All language subtitles for The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet S06E35 A Cruise For Harriet 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-CRFW (1)_track4_[eng]

[music playing]

- Eastman Kodak Company
is happy to bring you

America's favorite
family, the Nelsons:

Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky.

They enjoy good times
together, and, like most of us,

they enjoy them over
again in pictures,

in black and white, and, of
course, in beautiful color

snapshots.

- I was showing these color
snapshots to a friend of mine.

And he said, "Sure,
color pictures are fine,

but I don't have
a color camera."

I said to him, "Well, you
don't need a special camera

to take color pictures.

Every camera's a color camera."

And I showed him
this Kodacolor film.

See, it says,
"Kodacolor" right here.

All you do is put this
film in the camera

you've got right now.

I thought you might like
to know about this, too.

You can get just
terrific color pictures

with your present snapshot
or miniature camera

and the new Kodacolor film.

Try it, and you'll
see what I mean.

- And now, Kodak invites
you to enjoy "The Adventures

of Ozzie and Harriet."

[phone ringing]

- Hello?

- Hi, Harriet.

Guess who?

- Oh, hi, Clara.

- Oh, you're just too smart.

- [laughs] I'm psychic.

What's new?

- Well, hold on to your hat.

You and Ozzie are going
on a vacation next week.

- We are?

- That's what I hear.

Ozzie decided to
take next week off.

- When did you hear this?

- Today.

Sally Darby told me.

She heard it from Mary Williams.

Mary got it from Doc.

One of Doc's patients was
eating at Martin's Cafeteria,

and she overheard Ozzie's barber
telling somebody about it.

- Oh, well, I'm glad
Ozzie got a haircut.

- Do you have any
idea where you'll go?

- I have a pretty good idea.

This is just about
the time of year

Ozzie likes to go on
his annual fishing trip.

- Oh, I didn't know
you liked fishing.

- I don't.

I usually stay home.

- That doesn't
sound like much fun.

- Oh, I don't mind.

We usually go someplace
together later in the summer.

- Well, that doesn't seem fair.

Why should Ozzie get two
vacations and you only get one?

- Oh, I guess he wouldn't
mind if I went along.

It's just I don't like fishing.

- Well, then why don't you
go on a vacation someplace

without him?
- Oh, I don't know.

I don't think much of this
idea of separate vacations.

Neither does Ozzie.

- Well, maybe if he thought you
were going on a vacation alone,

he'd change his mind
and take you some place.

- Say, you know, you
may have an idea there.

I know just where
I'd like to go, too.

It's called the SS
John Paul Jones.

Have you ever heard of it?
- No, I haven't.

What's it like?

- Well, I understand it's
owned by this old sea captain.

He runs it just like
a ship on a cruise.

You dress for dinner,
and they have dancing.

And during the day, you
sit out on deckchairs

and soak up the sunshine.

It's just like taking
an ocean cruise,

except they guarantee
you won't get seasick.

- Sounds like fun.

Do you think Ozzie will go?

- Well, it depends
on how interested

he is in the fishing trip.

I know he won't want me
to go on a vacation alone,

so maybe I can bluff him.

Oh, Ozzie just came in.

Maybe I can get him interested
before he has a chance

to mention the fishing trip.

- OK, goodbye, dear.

- Goodbye, Clara.

- Harriet?

- Hi.

- Where do you think
I'm going next week?

That's fine.

Thanks.

- Sounds like a pretty
crazy place, Mom.

- Oh, I don't know.

- A ship out of water?

- Well, it may sound crazy,
but there is such a place.

I've checked on it.

- Yeah, but what
fun can you have?

If you're going to be on a ship,
you want to be on the water.

- Not me.

- I know what you mean,
but it sounds pretty silly.

- This whole problem
sounds very simple to me.

- What problem?

- Well, let's say there's
a division of thought.

Pop wants to go fishing, and
Mom wants to go on this cruise.

- Well, Pop's right.

That's no problem.

If I know Mom, Pop
will go on the cruise.

- Wait a minute.

It's true I often bow
to your mother's wishes.

- When?

- This is different.

I've been going on this
fishing trip every year,

and for the same reason.

- I never knew
there was a reason.

- Well, maybe "reason"
is the wrong word.

Anyway, I'm going fishing.

- Oh, I'm not objecting to that.

I just thought as long as you
were going to take a vacation,

I might as well take one
too and go on this cruise.

- Well, by yourself?
- Well, why not?

You go fishing by yourself.

- Well, that seems fair.

Will you excuse me?

- Yes, certainly, dear.

- Where are you going?

- To the movies.

- By yourself?

- No, I was thinking of
going with a couple of girls.

- Oh.
Who are they?

- I don't know.
Who can you get?

- Will you excuse us?

We have a little
problem to settle.

- Yes, of course, dear.

- Now you see how easy it is?

- Frankly, no.
- Well, look.

David--

- We weren't
talking about David.

- Well, all right, I know that.

- After all, you go
fishing by yourself.

There's no reason why I can't
go on this cruise by myself.

- Harriet, that's like
taking separate vacations.

- Oh, don't be so old-fashioned.

Lots of people do it.

- Well, I suppose you're right.

- It'd be a wonderful change
for me, a complete rest.

I'll meet a lot of new
and interesting people.

Well, you know how
those cruises are.

You've seen those
pictures in the magazines.

- Well, yeah.

- Did you say something, dear?

- No, no, I was just thinking.

I-- I suppose it
would be more fun

to go on a cruise like
that with somebody.

- Yes, it would.

Of course, I don't want you to
worry about my being lonely.

I'd probably find lots
of company up there.

- Oh.

Well, if you really want to
go, I think you ought to go.

It might be fun.

I brought your bags
down from the attic.

- Oh, thank you.
I got some things for the trip.

How do you like this?

- Oh, it's a bathing--

no, no, no, it's a--

- A cocktail dress.

- Yeah, it's very nice.
Very smart.

- Think it's too extreme?

- No, no, I think
it's very nice.

Hey, that smells good.

What's that?

- It's a new perfume
called Irresistible.

I thought I'd take
that along, too.

- Yeah, it's very exotic.

Mm, that smells good.
- Well, wait a minute.

Don't go away.

I got some other
things to show you.

How do you like this?

- [chuckles] What
the heck is this?

- It's a bathing suit.

- Oh!

I'll be darned.

That's a cute little thing.

Uh, Harriet?

- Yes?

- I was just thinking.

Uh, have you seen my new
fishing lures any place?

Have you got your tickets?

- Uh huh, right here.

You all set for your trip?

- Yes, I am.

- Got your fishing lures?

- Oh, yes, I found them.
Thanks.

- Good morning.

My name is Courtney.

I'm cruise director.

- Oh, good morning.

- We'll be shoving off
in just a few minutes.

Are these your bags?
- Yes, they are.

Thank you.

- If there's anything
I can do to make

your cruise more pleasant,
don't hesitate to call on me.

- Well, thank you very much.

- Nice, young fella.

- Yes, he is.

Looks like this is going
to be a lot of fun.

- Yeah, well,
should we get going.

- Hey, Mom, bon voyage.

- Oh, well, thank you, dear.

That's very nice of you.

Did you have any
trouble finding me?

- No, there are not many ships
leaving from this bus station.

- I see what you mean.

- May I take that for you?

- Oh, well, yes, thank you.

- Well, I guess you'd better
get on the bus, that is,

climb aboard.

- Aren't you going
to see me off?

- Well, I'm parked in a
10-minute zone out there.

I don't think I'd better.

- Oh, well, goodbye.

- Goodbye, dear.
Have a nice time.

- Thank you.
You, too.

- Bye, Mom.
- Goodbye, dear.

- Well, I'll be
seeing you, Dave.

Boy, will your
mother be surprised

when she sees me up there.

- She will.

She didn't suspect a thing.

- It worked perfectly.

- You'd better get
started if you're

going to beat the bus up there.
- OK, Dave.

Well, say goodbye
to Rick for me.

- OK, Pop.

[music playing]

Mom!

What are you doing back here?

- Oh, I decided not to go.

It just wouldn't be any
fun without your father.

- Good afternoon, folks.

Welcome aboard the
SS John Paul Jones.

Even though our
ship is on dry land,

we want you to enjoy all
the thrills and pleasures

of an ocean cruise.

According to the
latest weather report,

we're going to have smooth
sailing and lots of sunshine.

The stewards will show you to
your cabins and staterooms now.

Oh, and don't forget, we have
lifeboat drill once a day.

- Welcome aboard, sir.

- Oh, thank you very much.

Has the bus arrived yet?

- You mean the launch?

- Oh, yes, uh, the one
that came up Highway 12.

- Yes, sir.

That arrived at 1300.

- Oh, doggone.

I thought maybe I
could beat it up here.

- Didn't you come up
on the launch, sir?

- No, I didn't.

I came up in my, uh, my yacht.

- I beg your pardon?

- I-- I drove my car.

- May I take you back
to your stateroom, sir?

- Oh, well, I don't
have a stateroom yet.

- Oh?

- I'm-- I'm staying
with my wife.

- Is she on board yet?

- Well, I imagine so.

She came up on the launch.

- I'll handle it for you.

Now hear this.

Now hear this.

- Oh, uh, just a--

maybe you'd better
not "now hear this."

I think I'll surprise her.

- Certainly.

- Oh, and what's
the nearest town?

I'd like to drive down
and buy her some flowers.

- I'm afraid that's
quite impossible, sir.

We're three miles offshore.

- Oh, oh, yes.

- We do have a
flower shop on board.

It's on B Deck, top
side, starboard.

- Top side?

- Um, upstairs
and to your right.

- Oh, oh, thank you.

- Yes, sir?

What can I do for you?

- Oh, uh, do you mind if
I look over here a minute?

- No, go right ahead.

- Do you suppose
you could deliver

this orchid corsage for me?

- Certainly.

What is the number of
the lady's stateroom.

- Oh, gee, I'm sorry.

I don't know.

Her name is Nelson.

- I'll check with
the purser, and we'll

deliver it right away.
- Oh, thank you, very much.

- Yes?

- I have some flowers for you.

- For me?

- Your name is Ms.
Nelson, isn't i?

- That's right.
- Here they are.

- Thank you.

"From one who
longs to meet you."

[music playing]

- Good evening, Mr. Nelson.

- Good evening.

Has she arrived yet?
- Yes, sir.

And, uh, I delivered the bottle
of champagne to her table.

- Oh, thank you, very much.

- Right this way, sir.

Here you are, sir.

- Well, good evening.

- Oh.

- Are you the
gentleman who sent me

the corsage and the champagne?

- Oh, well, I--

[chuckles] I-- I-- I guess I am.

- Well, won't you sit
down and share it with me?

- Would you, uh, pardon me
for just a moment, please?

- Certainly.

- Uh, pardon me, steward?

- Yes, sir?

- You, uh, delivered that
champagne to the wrong table.

- Oh, I'm terribly
sorry, but I thought

you said the lady's
name was Nelson.

- That's right, but I
meant a different Nelson.

She's not my wife.

- She isn't?

- I've never seen her
before in my life.

- Oh, my.

Do you suppose
she's an imposter?

- No, no.

It's just that she's
not the right wife.

- Shall I try to get the
bottle of champagne back?

- Oh, no, no, no.

You might embarrass her.

- I'm terribly sorry.

- Oh, well, that's OK.

I'll, uh-- well, I'll
be back a little later.

Pardon me.
- Yes, sir.

- Hmm.

No, sir.

I'm sorry, but there's no
Harriet Nelson on board.

- But-- but there must be.

She got on the launch.

- The launch?

- Yeah, it's the bus.

She came up by bus.

And I drove up here
in my, uh, in my car,

expecting to meet her here.

- Then you don't
have a stateroom?

- Well, I don't,
but my wife does.

- She's not on board.

Oh, uh, Captain, would you
mind stepping in here a moment,

please, sir?

- What's the trouble, Mr. Evans?

- I think we've got
a stowaway aboard.

- Oh!

No, no, no, I'm not a stowaway.

I can pay my own passage.

- Excuse me.
- Oh!

Oh, hello there.

- Hello.

What happened to you?

- Oh, well, I, uh, I got
tied up on some business

with the captain
and the purser here.

- Thanks for the champagne.

- Oh, that's OK.

Did you enjoy it?

- Yes, it was very nice.

But I wish you'd stayed
to enjoy it with me.

- Oh, well, uh, perhaps
some other time.

- Oh, Captain, I
wanted to tell you,

I found some strange
luggage in my room.

- Oh, oh, that must be mine.

Uh, I-- I-- see, uh,
her name is Nelson,

and I thought she was my wife.

- I haven't caused
you any trouble?

- Oh, no.
- Oh, no, Miss.

We're terribly sorry.

We'll have the gentleman's
luggage removed immediately.

- Well, yes.
Here, I'll help you.

- Would you mind staying
here, Mr. Nelson?

Thank you, Miss.

And if you have
any more trouble,

be sure to let us know.

- Thank you.

- Mr. Nelson.

- Oh, uh, I was
wondering, uh, could you

arrange for some kind of a room
or something for me, Captain?

- Yes, we'll do our best to
find suitable accommodations

for you.

- Oh, hi, mate.

- Oh, hi.

They told me I could bunk here.

I'm one of the passengers.

- I don't care what you are,
as long as you don't snore.

[music playing]

- Good evening
again, Mr. Nelson.

- Oh, good evening.

- If you're looking for
the same young lady,

she's right over there.

- Oh, no, no, no, no.

I just want to sit in
the corner someplace

and listen to the dance music.

- Very good, sir.

Here you are, sir.

- Oh, thank you very much.

This is fine.

- Would you care for something?

- Oh, maybe just
a cup of coffee.

- Yes, sir.

[laughter]

- What's the matter, honey?

- Oh, look at that
poor man sitting over

there all by himself.

He looks like he
needs cheering up.

Why don't we invite him over?

- Well, it's OK with me.

Very sensitive girl.

- Hi.
My name is Florence.

What's yours?

- Oh, uh, my name is Ozzie.

- Well, come on over anyway.
We'd like you to join our party.

- Oh, no.
Thank you very much.

- Oh, come on.

You look like you
need some cheering up.

- Oh, well, no.

I'd just put a
damper on the party.

Thanks just the same.

- Excuse me, Mr. Nelson.

A young lady sent this
over with her compliments.

- Oh.
- Excuse me.

- Oh, no, uh, Miss.

Oh, well, I think I know
the young lady you mean.

Would you return it and tell
her thanks just the same?

- Yes, sir.

- What's the matter?

- I'm sorry, but the
gentleman sent it back.

- Oh.

Guess I'll have to
deliver it personally.

- Thank you.

- You're not very sociable.

- Oh, Harriet!

Well, for goodness sakes,
where have you been?

I've been looking
all over for you.

- I've been looking
all over for you.

Where have you been?

- Well, I have a
room below decks.

Not exactly a room, a bunk.

I'm in there with a
boiler man, third class.

Where are you?

- Oh, I've got a lovely
stateroom on A deck.

- Well, that's impossible.

I've been asking
the purser, and he

says there's no Mrs.
Nelson on board.

- Well, there isn't, but
there's a Ms. Hilliard.

- Oh, your mother's--

Ms. Hilliard?

What's the idea of that?

- Well, you told the boys I was
going to meet a handsome man up

here, and I didn't
think he'd be interested

if he found out I was married.

- Well, yeah, I was the hands--

I mean, I mean, it was
just a kind of a joke.

- Yes, I know, dear.

David told me all about it.

In fact, he drove me up here.

- But I thought you
came up on the bus.

- Well, it's a long story.

At any rate, aren't
you glad to see me?

- Well, gee, of course.

You know I am.

I was going back
tomorrow morning.

Gee, you don't
know how miserable

I've been up here without you.

- Did they get all
of your luggage out

of my stateroom, honey?

- [choking] Oh, uh, yes,
uh, y-- y-- yes, they did.

Thank you.

- Thanks again for the
corsage and the champagne.

- Oh, uh, this is
Ms. Nelson, my wife.

- I'm your wife.

- [chuckles] Well,
yes, of course.

This is my wife, uh--

- Harriet.

- --uh, Harriet.

This is Florence.

No, no, no, no, no.

The other girl is Florence.

- All I can say is you
sure do get around, sport.

- You should have seen
him when he was younger.

- Uh, Harriet, this whole
thing is very easily explained.

- Shall we dance?

- Oh, yes!

[music playing]

Good evening, Captain.
- Good evening.

- Good evening.

Shall we take a turn
around the deck?

- Oh, it's getting kind of late.

Why don't we go right
down to your stateroom?

- All right.

- Pardon me, please.

Mr. Evans, there's something
strange going on around here.

[buzzer]

- Oh, excuse me, Captain.

Purser speaking.

What was that
stateroom again, sir?

A63.

Yes, sir.

That's funny.

It's that Nelson guy again.

He wants his luggage
transferred to stateroom A63.

- And I'll bet I can tell
you whose stateroom that is--

Ms. Harriet Hilliard.

- You're right, sir.

- Mr. Evans, we'd
better see about this.

- Aye, aye, sir.

- Go ahead, knock.

- Me?

- Yes, you, and that's an order.

- An order?

We're not at sea.

- Oh, stand aside.

- Yes, gentlemen?

- Excuse me, Ms. Hilliard.

Is there a Mr. Nelson
in your stateroom?

- Well, yes, there is.

- Would you ask him to
step out here, please?

- Well, yes, certainly.

- Do you want to see me?

- Who are you?

- Uh, David Nelson.

- Are you sure his
name was Nelson?

- Positive, unless he
gave us a phony name.

Isn't there an old guy in there?

- Oh, you must mean Pop.

- Oh, good evening, Captain.

Is my luggage here?

- Mr. Nelson, was it your
intention-- well, that is,

this is Ms.
Hilliard's stateroom.

- It's Mrs. Nelson's stateroom.

- Maybe I can
straighten this out.

You see, my maiden
name was Hilliard,

but my married name is Nelson.

- Then you're married?

- Yeah, to the old guy.

- [chuckles]

- I'm terribly sorry.

- This is our son, David.

- He drove me up here.

- See, we have
another son home, too.

- And we're the young guys.

- Yes, of course.

- Do you suppose it's possible
to find accommodations for him?

- Oh, yes, of course.

I'll get right on it.

- Oh, well, thank you very much.

- Good night.

- Uh, good night.

- Evans, one of these days,
I'm going to get on that launch

and I'm going to
leave this phony hotel

and I'm going back to my farm.

- Hi.

- Hiya, mate.

- They told me I
could bunk in here.

- Sure.

Take the one down below.

What happened to the old guy?

- He's in a stateroom
up on A deck.

- Good.

He looked like a snorer to me.

- You know, it's pretty funny.

I started out on this
cruise by myself.

- [chuckles] Well,
it'll be a lot of fun.

We'll all get a good rest.
- Well, suits me.

[alarm blaring]

- Now hear this.

Now hear this.

This is the captain speaking.

All hands on deck.

This is a lifeboat drill.

[alarm blaring]

[music playing]

[applause]

[whistles]

Ladies and gentlemen, may I have
your attention for one moment,

please?

Two of our talented guests
have very graciously consented

to sing a couple of numbers for
us, Ozzie and Harriet Nelson.

[applause]

[music playing]

- Catch a falling star
and put it in your pocket.

Never let it fade away.

- Catch a falling star
and put it in your pocket.

Save it for a rainy day.

- Ooh, love may come and
tap you on the shoulder

some starless night.

And just in case you feel
you want to hold her--

- You'll have a pocket
full of starlight.

- You'll have a pocket
full of starlight.

- Catch a falling star
and put it in your pocket.

Never let it fade away.

- Never let it fade away.

- Catch a falling star
and put it in your pocket.

Save it for a rainy day.

- When your troubles
started multiplying,

and they just might, it's easy
to forget them without trying.

- With just a
pocketful of starlight.

- Catch a falling star
and put it in your pocket.

Never let it fade away.

- Never let it fade away.

- Catch a falling star
and put it in your pocket.

Save it for a rainy day.

- Save it for a rainy day.

- Save it for a rainy day.

- Save it for a
rainy, save it for a--

- Rainy day.

[applause]

[music playing]

- Just because you
think you're so pretty.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

- Just because your
mama thinks you're hot.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

- Just because you
think you got something-

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

- --that nobody else has got.

You caused me to
spend all my money.

You laughed and called
me old Santa Claus.

- Called me Santa Claus.

- But I'm telling you,
baby, I'm through with you

because, just because.

- Just because you
think you're so pretty.

Just because your mama
thinks you're hot.

Just because you think
you got something

that nobody else has got.

- No one else has got.

- You've caused me to
spend all my money.

You laughed and called
me old Santa Claus.

- Called me Santa Claus.

- But I'm telling you,
baby, I'm through with you

because, just because.

Because, just because.

[applause]

[ending theme]

- "Ozzie and Harriet" are
brought to you on film

by Eastman Kodak
Company, who remind you

that this month,
your Kodak dealer

is making a special feature
of Brownie movie cameras.

Now is the time to make
your family movie stars.

This has been an ABC television
network film presentation.