All language subtitles for The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet S04E05 Carnation Perfume 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-CRFW (1)_track4_[eng]

[music playing]

- [SINGING] Every day's
a holiday with Hotpoint.

The dishwasher stops all
your dish-washing drudgery.

Hotpoint's electric range
cooks automatically.

Every day's a holiday
with Hotpoint.

The refrigerator with
wonderful Frost-away.

Washer and dryer mean
goodbye to wash day.

Hotpoint dealers bring you
"The Ozzie and Harriet Show."

[theme music]

- And now, Hotpoint presents
America's favorite family

comedy, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family--

Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky--

with Don DeFore as Thorny.

- Anybody want
any more biscuits?

- Not me.
Thanks.

- Can I have one?

These sure are good.

- You sure have a
healthy appetite today.

- I'm eating for two.

- For two?

- Yes, ma'am, two meals.

I skipped breakfast
this morning.

Can I have some more potatoes?

- Yes, there's some
more out in the kitchen.

- How about some lamb chops?

- Yes, there are a couple
more out in the kitchen.

There's some salad
out there, too.

- Why do we eat in the kitchen?

There's more food out there
than there is in here.

- Want some rolls, Dave?

- No thanks, Pop.

I'm not very hungry.

- You'd better
start eating, boy.

Don't you want to grow up to
be big and strong like me?

- Stop threatening me.

- You don't feel sick or
anything, do you, Dave?

- No, I just don't
feel like eating.

- Don't you recognize
the symptoms, Pop?

No appetite, mooning around
the house all the time.

You know what that means?

This boy's overdrawn
at the bank.

- I am not.

- Then how about lending me $1?

- How about leaving me alone?

- If you lend me $1,
I can go to the movies

and leave you alone
the whole afternoon.

- Well, I must admit,
it's a temptation.

- I can't understand
you're passing up

this good food, Dave.

Something must be the matter.

Is there anything I
can help you with?

- Don't let him
go out with girls.

That'll do it.

- Oh, Ricky, will you get lost?

- Don't be funny, Ricky.

- I'm just trying to
cheer him up, Mom.

Those sad eyes of his
are spoiling my appetite.

Do you have another lamb chop?

- Yeah, they're
out in the broiler.

- This sure is a swell meal.

- Now that he's
gone, I can tell you.

- Speak up!

I don't want to miss anything.

- What happened?

Did you have an
argument with Susie?

- No, I didn't.

That's what makes it
so hard to figure out.

- But you did have some
sort of misunderstanding?

- No, not even that.

I asked her if she wanted to
go to the show with me tonight,

and she said OK.

But she acted kind of
strange, like she expected

me to say something else.

I don't know, it's kind
of hard to explain.

- But she did say she'd
go to the show with you.

- Well, she said OK,
but it was the way

she said it, like she didn't
care whether she went or not.

- Maybe she's already
seen the picture.

- Go eat your chop and
mind your own business.

- This is my business.

We're not going to stand
by and watch some girl push

my brother around.

I'll tell you what, Dave, why
don't I take her out tonight

and find out what
the trouble is?

- Get your own girl.

- Get your own girl.

Get your own chop.

Nobody can say I'm pampered.

- Dave?

- Yes, ma'am?

- Where do you usually take
Susan when you take her out?

- Most of the time,
we go to a show.

- Hey, I think your mother's
hit on something there, Dave.

Maybe she's tired of going
to the show all the time.

Why don't you take
her someplace else?

- Where?

- Well, why don't you take her
to where your father took me

on our first date?

Do you remember, dear?

- Oh, do I remember?

Sure.

Why don't you take
her there, Dave?

Uh, well, you tell him, Harriet.

- No, it was your idea.

You tell him, dear.

- Uh, well, uh--

now, on second
thought, I don't think

they'd enjoy that very much.

- Why not?

What's wrong with ice skating?

- Oh.

Well, yeah, I think it'd
be a lot of fun, Dave.

Gee, I'll never forget
the fun your mother

and I had the first date
that we went ice skating.

- We went bowling.

- Oh, oh, yeah, bowling.

Boy, I'll never forget it.

- You already have.

- We went to Monahan's
Bowling Alley.

- It was Sweeney's.

- Well, uh, Sweeney is
Monahan's brother-in-law.

You see, Dave, you
got to watch out.

Women like you to remember
those little details.

[chuckles]

- Why don't you phone
Susie and ask her

if she'd like to go bowling?

- Yeah, I think I will.

Excuse me for a minute,
will you, please?

- What else do you remember
about our first date?

- Oh, well, I remember
we had a wonderful time.

And, uh, I remember
on the way home,

I said to myself, boy, I've got
to take that girl out again.

[chuckles]

- Did you?

- Well, sure.

- Do you remember
the dress I wore?

- Oh, yeah, Uh, pardon me.

Uh, Rick?

Could I have that other
lamb chop, please?

- I'm sorry, Pop.

I'm eating it right now.

- Oh, gee.

Uh, well, how about
some more carrots?

- Oh, I ate those, too.

Would you like some salad?

- Uh, no thanks.

- Well, that's good
because I ate that.

- Kid sure has an appetite.

- He sure has.

Tell me some more about
our first date, dear.

I'd like to refresh my memory.

- Now, wait a minute.

You mean to say you've
forgotten our first date?

- Oh, now that was very
clever of you, dear.

Now you've got me
on the defensive.

- Don't be silly.

How could I forget
our first date?

The night we went, uh, bowling.

- Thank you, dear.

Let's hope bowling
proves as lucky for Dave.

- Well, I called Susan and
told her we were going bowling.

- Oh, what was her reaction?

- Just about the same.

She said OK and hung up.

- May I say a few words here?

- Go ahead.

- Now, I know my opinion in this
case is completely unsolicited.

- That's for sure.

- However, I'd like to ask
a few pertinent questions.

First of all, when you
take this girl out,

are you polite and considerate?

- Naturally.

- You help her on with her coat?

Do you open the car
door and help her in?

- Of course.

- You get her home
at a reasonable hour?

- Well, naturally.

- Well, that's your
trouble right there.

- What do you mean?

- You're a big square.

[music playing]

Going out, Pop?

- Yeah, I thought I'd
take a little ride down

to the emporium.
I want to buy something.

- Mom finally got
through to you, huh?

- What do you mean?

- All that hinting she was
doing about your first date.

She even got through to me,
and I was out in the kitchen.

- Oh.

[chuckles] Your mother
has many attributes,

and knowing when not to
be subtle is one of them.

- Maybe she was
afraid you'd forget.

- Oh, no, she knows I wouldn't
forget anything as important

as that.

- What are you going
to do about it?

- Well, I usually manage
to commemorate the event

by buying her some little gift.

- Sort of helps keep peace
in the family, huh, Pop?

- Well, yes.

See, women like to
receive little gifts

on special occasions
like the first date,

the day we moved
into the new house.

- What about my birthday?

That's a special occasion.

If it hadn't been for me,
David would be an only-child.

- Yes, I suppose your mother
deserves something for that.

- She sure does.

Just remember, Pop, a
gentlemen never strikes a lady.

[music playing]

- Good afternoon, sir.

May I help you?

- Yes, I'd like to buy
some perfume, please.

- Well, we have a
wonderful selection here.

This one is called Parlez Moi
d'Amour: "speak to me of love."

- Oh, yes, I know, I studied
French in high school.

- Oh!

- Oh, uh, yes,
that's, uh, very nice.

However, it's not
exactly what I want.

- Oh.

Well, now here we
have a lovely perfume.

It's called Something.

It's for the woman
who has everything.

- Well, well, uh,
this is for my wife.

- Oh, well, then you
probably would like something

a little less expensive.

- Oh, no, not necessarily.

It's just that I know
exactly what I want.

It's a perfume called Carnation.

- Carnation?

I don't believe I've
ever heard of it.

- Oh?

Well, it comes in
a little bottle

about like that, has a picture
of a carnation on the front.

I've been buying it
here for about 15 years.

- Oh.

Well, I'll ask one
of the older girls.

Excuse me.

- Hi, Oz!

- Oh, hiya, Thorny.

- Hey, cut that out, will you?

You want to get me in trouble?

I'm in enough as it is.
- Oh?

What's the matter?

- Well, I bought these
earrings for Catherine

for our anniversary, but
she doesn't like them.

- Oh, gee, that's too bad.

- Yeah, too bad is right.

I got them here on sale and
didn't read the fine print.

Now the store won't
take them back.

I'm stuck for $4.95.

- Hey, how about that?

- Uh, excuse me, sir.

That was Carnation?

- Yes, that's right, Carnation.

- Thank you.

- What are you doing here?

- Well, I just came in to
buy a present for Harriet,

some Carnation perfume.

- Say, why don't you give her
some nice earrings instead?

I'll let you happen for
exactly what I paid for them.

Nice?

- Yes, they look lovely on you.

I want to buy her some perfume.

- Pardon me, sir.

How do you spell that?

- C-A-R-N-A-T-I-O-N.

- Well, I'd better check
with the stock room.

- Where did you ever
hear of that stuff?

- Oh, well, Harriet wore
it on our very first date.

It's an imported perfume.

- Oz, most of those
countries were wiped out

in the first World War.

- I'm sure they still make it.

I buy it for Harriet every year.

It's her favorite perfume.

- Hasn't she got
any sense of smell?

- Well, sure.
It's very nice.

She likes it.

- Well, she has to like it.

You keep buying it for her.

- I'm sure if she
didn't, she'd tell me.

We always tell each other
if we don't like something.

She hasn't registered
any complaints yet.

- Here we are, sir.

- Oh, yes, that's right.

I'm surprised you had such
difficulty finding it.

- Well, I'm sorry, sir, but the
country it was imported from

was wiped out during
the first World War.

[music playing]

- Hey, you're forgetting
your gladiola water.

- Uh, Carnation perfume.

Thanks a lot.

- I'll tell you
what, I'll trade you

the earrings for the perfume.

- Thorny, you don't understand.

I'd love to help
you out, but this

is sort of a family
tradition, like a ritual.

And Harriet would be
terribly disappointed

if I didn't give her
this particular perfume.

- Wait, Oz!
You'll ruin the wrapping.

- Well, I don't
want her to see it.

- Look, Oz, I'll tell
you what, why don't you

throw in the earrings too?

You're going to be a real sport,
and it will only cost you 4.95.

- Oh, hiya, Pop.

Boy, am I glad to see you.

Hi, Mr. Thornberry.
- Hi, Dave.

- What's the trouble, son?

- I was supposed to be
at Susan's in 20 minutes.

I wanted to ask you a favor.

- How much do you need?

- Oh, it's nothing like that.

See, I spilled some jam
on my brown sport coat,

and my other one's
at the cleaners.

- Oh, you want to borrow this?

- Well, yes, sir,
if you don't mind.

- It sounds like our house.

- I would have taken
one of your other ones

but this is my favorite.

It's got the broader shoulders.

- Oh.

- Yeah, there is
quite a letdown.

- Thorny, please.

- Oh, uh, Pop, that's
my favorite tie, too.

- Oh.

Uh, you are satisfied with the
pants you've got on, I hope?

- Yes, sir.

- OK, have a good time, son.

- Uh, Pop?

There is one other thing.

My car hasn't been running
so well lately, and I was--

Thanks a lot, Pop.

- OK, have a good time.

- Well, he did all
right, didn't he?

- Actually, his own
clothes for them better,

but, you know, there's nothing
like wearing dad's coat

and tie.

- Yeah, and driving dad's car.

- Oh, hi, dear.

Where have you been?

- Oh, just downtown,
around, eh, Thorny?

- That's right.
- Hi, Thorny.

- Hi.

Say, those are mighty
nice-looking earrings

you're wearing there.
- Well, thank you.

I didn't think you could
see them from there.

- Oh, yes.

I always say, earrings add
to a woman's attractiveness.

Don't you think?
- Uh, Thorny.

- Well, I suppose.
- Oh, definitely.

A woman just can't
have too many earrings.

- Uh, Thorny, we'll
be seeing you, Thorny.

- I'll be seeing you, Oz.

- Where's your coat, dear?

- Oh, uh, Dave borrowed it.

Borrowed my tie too.

- Oh, yes, he was
waiting for you.

Oh, incidentally,
there's a package

in on the hall chair
for you, from me to you.

- Oh, well, that's very nice.

And I've got a--

Oh.

Uh, David, I...

Oh, uh, pardon me
just a second, dear.

[music playing]

Hello?

- Hiya, Pop.

- Oh, hiya, son.

Boy, don't tell me the emporium
is closed at this hour.

- See your present?

- Hello?

- Mom left it over
there on your chair.

- How do you like that?

They're closed.

What time is it?

- Quarter after 5:00.

- Oh, I'd better put
this in the closet, son.

- Don't you want to open it?

- No, I don't want open this
until your mother opens her's.

- When's she going
to open her's.

- Well, uh, when
I give it to her.

- What are you waiting for?

- Well, I'm waiting
for David to come back.

- I don't get it.

- He's got my coat.

- Oh, come on, Pop,
don't be so formal.

You can give it to her
in your shirt sleeves.

- That's not the point.

See, it's in my coat pocket,
and David borrowed my coat.

Don't know where he is.

If he doesn't get
home pretty soon,

your mother will think I forgot
to get a present for her.

You don't know where Dave
and Susie went, do you?

- They went bowling.

- What makes you so sure?

- It was your suggestion.

That's where you and Mom
went on your first date.

- No, no, your mother
and I went ice--

- Where are you going?

- Down to the bowling alley,
see if I can find them.

- Can I go?
- Yeah, sure, hurry up.

- I'll tell Mom.

- No, no, no, no,
don't tell your mother.

[music playing]

See them any place?

- Isn't that David over there?

- Where?

- Over there with
the gray slacks.

- No, she's too tall.

- How about you and me
bowling a couple of games?

- Look, Rick, we're not here to
bowl, we're here to find Dave.

I wonder where else
he could have gone.

- The movies, maybe?

- Yeah, I think you're right.

[music from film]

[WHISPERING] Have you seen him?

- [WHISPERING] Not yet.

It's hard to see in here.

- [WHISPERING] He wasn't
up in the balcony.

Dave?

Dave?

- Shh!

- [WHISPERING] Looks
like a good picture.

- Shh.

Dave?

Dave?

- [WHISPERING] I'm over here.

- [WHISPERING] Where?

- [WHISPERING] Over here.

Pardon me, sir.

Sorry.

Pardon me, sir.

Dave?

- [WHISPERING] I'm over here.

- [WHISPERING] Pardon me.

Pardon me.

I'm sorry.

Pardon me.

- What did-- what
did you want, sonny?

- [WHISPERING] Oh!

I'm sorry, you're
not the right David.

I was looking for my son.

- It must be somebody
else, sonny boy.

I'm an orphan.

-

[people shushing]

Pardon me.

I'm sorry.

Pardon me again, sir.

Sorry.

Pardon me.

Pardon me.

Dave?

Dave?

Ricky?

- What time you think
Pop will be back, Mom?

- Oh, I don't even know
where he went, Dave.

Is there anything
I can do for you?

- Oh, no thanks.
I just wanted to talk to Pop.

You don't mind waiting for a
few minutes, do you, Susie?

- Oh, no, that's all right.

- Would you care
for a Coke, Susie?

- Oh, yeah.
Do you want a Coke, Susie?

- I'd love one, if it
wouldn't be too much trouble.

- Oh, no.

Stay right there,
Ma, I'll get it.

- Maybe we should have
gone to a drug store.

They sell perfume.

- Yeah, but they're
all closed by now.

Besides, they don't
sell Carnation perfume.

- It's pretty late.

David should be home by now.

- Sure hope so.

- Oh, hiya, Pop!
- Oh, hiya, Dave!

- I got him, Pop!

- Hey, cut it out!

- Uh, do you have the present?

- How'd you know about it?

- Well, I left it in the--

oh, here we are.

- What's that?

- The present I
bought your mother.

What present were
you talking about?

- Susan's present.

It's her birthday today,
and I forgot all about it.

That's why she acted so funny
over the phone this morning.

Can you lend me $5 so I can go
downtown and buy her a present?

- We just been through all that.

The stores are all closed.

- What am I going to do?

The worst part of it is
she remembered my birthday.

- Why don't you just
give her the money?

- I can't do that.

- Uh, Dave, do you think she'd
like a bottle of perfume?

- Well, I'm sure she would.

- Well, here, give her this.

- Gee, Pop, I can't do that.

That's your present to Mom.
- That's OK.

I'm sure your mother
would understand.

Go ahead, son.

- Gee, thanks a lot, Pop.

- It's OK, Dave.

- What are you going to
do about Mom's present?

- Hey, wait a minute!

I know where I can get a
present for your mother.

Stay right there, son.

- That's what I like,
a lot of action.

[music playing]

- Thorny?

- Quiet, Oz.
Sit down.

It's real good.

- Oh, where's Catherine?

- She turned in early.

Too scary for her.
- Oh.

Well, uh--

- Say, how'd Harriet
like the perfume?

- That's what I want
to talk to you about.

I didn't give it to her.

- Oh, you chickened out, huh?

- Uh, no.

See, David needed
a birthday present

to give to his girlfriend, so I
gave it to him to give to her.

- Oz, what a dirty trick to
play on the poor little girl.

- Are you kidding?

It's good perfume.

Harriet's liked it
all these years.

- What are you going
to give Harriet?

- Well, that's the point.

Now, you still have these
earrings, don't you?

- Yeah, right over here.

- Uh, OK.

Well, here's the deal, as long
as you're stuck with them,

I'm willing to take them off
your hands for, oh, say, $2.

- How about taking them
off my hands for $10?

- You can get them at any
store in town for $4.95.

- Sure you can...

When they're open.

- OK, I'll give
it $2.50 for them.

- Good night, Oz.

Sleep tight, that is if you
can with a splint on your leg.

Oz, please, you're
blocking the screen.

- OK, I'll tell what I'll do,
I'll give you $3.50 for them.

- Well, they cost $4.95.

- OK, $4.95.

- They're yours.

- You drive a hard bargain.

- No, Oz, they're yours.

I'm giving them to
you, for nothing.

- Oh, Thorny.

Why, I don't know what to say.

- Well, Catherine
doesn't want them,

and, frankly, they
don't look good on me.

- Oh, this is very nice of you.

You're a real pal.

- Oz, will you leave
before I start crying?

[woman screaming on television]

- Thanks a lot.

- So long.

- Oh, they're beautiful, dear.

- Oh, thanks a lot.

I'm glad you like them.

- Oh, you shouldn't have
spent all that money, though.

They look terribly expensive.

- Well, no, uh, not really.

You sure you like them?

You know what we've always said.

- Oh, of course I like them.

They're beautiful.

- I thought it'd be nice for a
change instead of the perfume,

although I know you
always like that.

- You know, it's funny,
that's what David gave Susan

for her birthday present,
that same Carnation

perfume you always gave me.

- Oh?

Uh, did she open it?

- Yes, she did.

It was nice of you
to help him out.

- David shouldn't have told you.

- He didn't.

I kind of smelled it.

- [chuckles] Well, I hope
you aren't too disappointed.

- Oh, no, I love the earrings.

- You sure you'd tell
me if you didn't?

- Oh, yes.

- Just like with the perfume?

- Well, as long as you didn't
get me the perfume this year,

I might as well make
a little confession.

I never did like the
smell of carnations much.

- For goodness sakes, dear,
why didn't you tell me?

- Well, I didn't want
to hurt your feelings.

- And you mean to say
you just threw away

the perfume every year?

- Oh, no.

You don't think I
do that, do you?

Look here.

Some girls save old love letters
and some save handkerchiefs

and other save trinkets.

But each one of these bottles
represents a year of happiness

to me.

Each one shows that you
cared enough to remember,

and I wouldn't part
with them for the world.

- That's about the nicest
thing anybody has ever

said to anybody.

Oh, and now may I open my
present, my plaid wool sport

shirt?

- How'd you know
that's what it was?

- Well, that's what you've
given me every year.

And, you know,
just because you've

been so nice about the
perfume all these years,

I'm not going to put
this one up in the attic.

I'm going to wear it.

Even though I am
allergic to wool,

even though I itch and scratch
like crazy, even though I break

out with the hives, I'm
going to wear it and love

every moment of it.

[music playing]

- Oh, the shirt looks
wonderful, dear.

- Oh, thanks a lot.

The sleeves are just--

but, uh, I'll tell you what
I want to speak to you about.

I took another look at
those perfume bottles

you've been saving, and there's
no perfume in any of them.

I wondered what
had happened to it?

- Oh, well, it
hasn't gone to waste.

Fortunately, mother's
birthday is next week,

so each year, I've
given her the perfume

and I've saved the bottles.

- Oh.

Well, no wonder you--

now, wait a minute.

I don't remember
your mother ever

smelling like Carnation perfume.

- And that's funny.

Neither do I. What
do you suppose

she's been doing with that
perfume all these years?

- I'll tell you
this much, I'll bet

your mother has the sweetest
smelling water pipes in town.

[ending theme]

- Next week's show
will be presented

by Aunt Jemima Pancake Mix.

[vocalizing]

For pancakes with that
matchless flavor--

- That matchless flavor
from four flours.

- --that flavor you can't
duplicate in a homemade

batter--

- Or get with any other mix.

- --buy Aunt Jemima, America's
favorite pancake mix.

- Light and tender
Aunt Jemima pancakes.

My, they're good.

[ending theme]

- Well, good night, folks.
We'll see you again next week.

- Good night.

And remember, every day's
a holiday with Hotpoint.

- Seven days a week.

- 365 days a year.

- Every day's a
holiday with Hotpoint.

- Yvette Dugay played the
part of the sales girl.

Susie was Diane Jergens.

Emmett Lynn was the
man in the theater.

This is Verne Smith speaking.

This has been an ABC Television
Network presentation.