All language subtitles for The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet S02E14 The Credit Reference 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-ZEW_track3_[eng]

- [SINGING] Point, point to
Hotpoint and a life of ease,

for Hotpoint makes the toughest
job around the house a breeze.

Yes, Hotpoint means
the best for you.

Appliances and cabinets, too.

Electric kitchens through
and through that work

automatically for you.

So point, point to
Hotpoint for your laundry.

Move Hotpoint in, and it moves
out all washing drudgery.

So point, point to
Hotpoint, as the Nelsons do.

You'll toss your
cares up in the air

when Hotpoint works for you.

Let Hotpoint work for you.

[theme music]

- And now, Hotpoint presents
America's favorite family

comedy, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson family.

Here is Ozzie, who plays
the part of Ozzie Nelson.

And of course, his lovely wife
Harriet as Harriet Nelson.

The older of the Nelson boys,
David, appears as David Nelson.

And his younger brother,
the irrepressible Ricky,

played by Ricky Nelson.

The Nelson's next-door
neighbor, Thorny,

is played by Don DeFore.

- Here's the mail, Mom.

- Oh, thank you, dear.

- Has Will Thornberry
been over here yet?

- No, not that I know of.
Why?

Was he supposed to?

- Yeah.

He was going to loan me his
Bob and Ray counterfeit set.

- What's this?

- It's a real neat thing.

Heck, you can make real, genuine
counterfeit money with it.

- Well, they'll put
you in jail for that.

- Oh, it's not real
counterfeit money, Mom.

It's just imitation stuff.

You know, the kind of
stuff they use on a stage.

- Oh, well, you be very
careful what you do with it.

- Well, you just use
it for jokes and stuff.

Heck, you can make all
kinds of money with it.

You can make Chinese
money, French money.

You can even make
Confederate money.

- That reminds me, I think we'll
have Southern-fried chicken

for dinner tonight.

Oh, say, look, if you're
going over to Will's,

will you give that
to the Thornberrys?

The mailman left
it here by mistake.

Oh, look at this.
- What is it?

Money?

- No, it's an ad from Wentworth.

You know, the new store in town.
They're having a sale.

- Oh, yeah.

That store's really
beautiful, Mom.

You ought to see it.

- I understand that it is.

- Well, I'll see you later, Mom.
- Oh, here.

Don't forget the letter.

- Oh, loafing on the job, eh?

- I sure am.

I'm getting some ideas here
that may scare you, too.

- Now, wait a minute.

Don't tell me you're
going to cook us

another Hungarian dinner now.

- No, I've just been looking
over this opening sales

advertisement from Wentworth.

- Oh, yeah, they tell
me that's quite a store.

- If looks like
quite a sale, too.

Listen to this.

"10% off on everything
from toothpicks to pianos."

- Oh, say, that's
pretty interesting.

After all, we could
use a new piano.

Ours is only three
years old, you know,

and a couple of the
strings are out of tune.

- What's going on?

You're having a picnic in here?

- No, Dave, but I
understand they're

having one down at
Wentworth's department store.

Only the women are invited.

- That sure is a swell
looking store, though.

Ricky did a real nice job.

- Well, what did Ricky
have to do with it?

- He spent so much
time down there

watching them build it that
they made him honorary foreman.

- Oh.

- Where is Ricky, anyway?

- Oh, he's over at
Will Thornberry's.

They're fooling around with
Will's counterfeiting set.

- Oh.

He promised to help me
get some firewood tonight,

but I guess he
forgot all about it.

- What's the firewood for?

- The school rally
tomorrow night.

We were going to have a
picnic, but it got too cold,

so we decided to have
a bonfire instead.

Our club was elected
to get the wood.

- Uh, Dave?
- Yes, sir?

- Are you sure they're
going to let you

have a big bonfire like that?

- Oh, sure, Pop.

We got permission.

Now all we need is the wood.

- Well, that might not
be so easy to run down

at the last minute.

- Yeah, that's what
I'm worried about, too.

I'm chairman of the committee.

- Does anybody want any money?

- Well, you're
back pretty quick.

- Yeah, that machine at Will
Thornberry's was really great.

- I hate to change
the subject, old boy,

but did you forget
you're supposed to help

me collect the firewood today?

- How about that?

I guess I did forget.
- Come on.

Let's go.

- OK.

- Hey, hey, wait a minute.
Rick.

What do you got sticking
out of your back pocket?

Looks like the afternoon mail.

- Oh, yeah.

Mom asked me to take these
over to the Thornberrys.

- Wait a minute!
Come back here.

I didn't say
anything of the kind.

I told you to take one letter
over to the Thornberrys.

- Gee, I guess you're right.

Guess I'm a little mixed up.

- Well, here, I'll
take the letters, son.

Look, Ricky, you're
a part of our family.

You accept the advantages
of being one of the members,

so it's up to you to accept a
few of the responsibilities,

too.

- I must admit you're right.

And I'm not just saying that
because Christmas is almost

here.

- Your father's right.

You showed plenty of
initiative about other things

like Will's counterfeiting set.

Let's have a little interest
in things around the house.

- OK, Mom.
- Come on, Ricky.

Let's go.
- OK.

Mom and Pop are just smoothing
out a few of my rough edges.

- If you ask me,
they're too late.

- Oh, hey, here's a
letter from Thorny.

- Oh, I know.

I asked Ricky to take
that over to them.

The mailman left
it here by mistake.

- No, no, no.
I know about that one.

I mean, this is a letter
from Thorny to me.

Oh, for goodness sakes.

Sometimes he acts
like a big kid.

[chuckles] Here, read this.

- "I'm tired of hearing
you complain about my not

paying off on the Rutgers
Princeton football bet.

Since you're so
impatient, here's the $5."

Well, wait a minute.

I thought Princeton
beat Rutgers.

- Well, not in 1948.

That's the year we made the bet.

- Well, at least
he's paying off.

- Yes, but look what
he paid me with:

Confederate money, and
counterfeit Confederate money

at that.

He attaches a little note.

"Hang on to these, Oz.

The South will rise again.

Signed Jefferson
Davis Thornberry."

- Oh, look.

Here's another letter from
Wentworth's Department Store.

They must really like us.

- Oh, it's probably another
advertisement for their opening

sale.

- Oh, no.

Apparently, the
Thornberrys are opening up

a charge account down
there, and they've

given us as credit reference.

- Well, that's Thorny for you.

He owes me a football
bet for about five years,

pays me with counterfeit
money, and then

gives me as a credit reference.

Here, let me see it.

Do you think this man is
a good financial risk?

Hey, I've just got
a fiendish idea.

- I don't like the
gleam in your eye.

- I'm going to answer some
of these questions honestly.

[chuckles] Uh,
would you consider

this man a good financial risk?

Definitely not.

Let's see.

There's another thing I
think they should know about.

He has an illegal source of
income, this Confederate money.

- You're not going to
mail that, are you?

- Oh, no, of course not.

I'm just going to kid
him along a little.

- Hi, Oz!

- Hiya, Thorny.

- I was just coming
over to see you all.

- Oh.
[chuckles]

- Hope you got my message, sir.

- We did, Thorny.

We got a tremendous
kick out of it.

It was very funny.

- I thought it was
inspirational myself.

- Oh, say, by the
way, evidently, you

applied for credit at
the new department store

and gave us as a reference.

They sent us a little
application form to fill out.

- Yeah, yeah.

What'd you say about me, Oz?

Nothing bad, I hope.

- Uh, well, of course, you
realize in a case like this,

a person has to tell the truth.

I mean, they can check up on
you, you know, if you don't.

- Well, of course.

- Well, I simply
told them the truth.

I said, in my opinion, I thought
you were a very poor risk,

that you issued counterfeit
money, paid your debts with it,

and that you were a bad
influence on the neighborhood.

- Wonderful, Oz, wonderful.

Now, what did you
really say about me?

- Uh, just that.

- What are you saying?

You mean you actually
told them I was a bad risk

and I use counterfeit money?

- Well, yes, Thorny.

After all, you did
welsh on a bet with me

and paid me off in
counterfeit money.

- But, Oz, that was only
a gag, and you know it!

- Well, I know, Thorny, but
after all, there's a civic duty

to perform in a case like this.

I mean, they wanted
straight facts,

and so I felt it was my
duty to give it to them.

- Just a minute.
- Oh, now wait a minute!

- That hasn't been mailed
yet, and it's not going to be.

- What do you
think you're doing?

- There goes your
poison pen letter.

There you are.

Now what you got
to say about it?

- Well, simply this,
that the credit reference

is in on our kitchen table.

- What is it I just tore up?

- Well, that's your
telephone bill.

They sent it to us by mistake.

Goodness sakes, man.

Calm down.

Don't blow your top.

Oh, oh, Harriet, there you are.

The gag was terrific.

- You mean about the
credit reference?

- Oh, Thorny really went for it.

- Oh, I hope he didn't
take it too seriously.

- Are you kidding?
He tore up his phone bill.

He thought that was a letter
to the department store.

He still thinks I'm
going to mail it.

- Oh, Ozzie, it seems
like an awful dirty trick

to play on him.
- Oh, are you kidding?

He'd do the same thing to
me if he had the chance.

Poor Thorny.

You know, it went
over so big, I think

I'll take the real letter
out there and tantalize

him a little more.

- Oh, great.

And you were calling
him childish.

- Uh, Harriet?

- Huh?

- What did you do with
the credit reference?

I left it on the kitchen
table, right in the envelope.

- Well, if you left it there,
dear, it must still be there.

- Hiya, Pop.

- Oh, hi, son.

- Looking for something?

- Yes, something very important.

- It wouldn't happen to
be a letter, would it?

- Well, yes, it was, a letter
to the department store.

Did you see it?

- Yes, sir.

You forgot to mail it,
so I mailed it for you.

- You really mailed it?
- Yes, sir.

I did even better than that.

I took it down to
the store myself

and delivered it in person.

- Well, for goodness sakes, son.

Why did you do that?

- You told me to
use my initiative.

- Well, I know.

- I don't mess around, boy!

- Yes, I know.

Holy smokes.

This is awful.

- Gee, I do
something wrong, Pop?

- No, no, you didn't do
anything wrong, son, but, gee,

I sure did.

- You told me to
use my initiative.

- I know I did.
- I don't mess around, boy.

- Yeah, I know.

You don't mess around.

- Well, if there's anything
else I can do for you,

Pop, just whistle.

- I will, son.

Oh, uh, Rick?

Rick?

[whistles] Uh, Rick, uh,
there is something else

you can do for me, son.

I know this is a rather unusual
request for your old dad

to make, but I think it's
fitting to the occasion.

Uh, I wonder if, uh--

no, I guess those shoes of
yours aren't quite heavy enough.

- Yes?

May I help you?

- Uh, you're the credit
manager, I assume.

- That's right.

Won't you sit down?

- Yes, thank you.

My name is Nelson, Ozzie Nelson.

- How do you do?

I assume you are here to open
a charge account at the store.

- Uh, no.

It's my neighbor who wants
to open the charge account.

He listed me as a reference.

- Oh, then you've
mailed in the reply?

- Yes, that's what I want
to speak to you about.

A, uh-- [chuckles] a
rather humorous situation

has developed.

You see, my neighbor is a
bit of a practical joker.

He pays his debts in
counterfeit money--

uh, not exactly
counterfeit money.

I mean, counterfeit-counterfeit
money, if you know what I mean.

- I'm not so sure that I do.

- Well, I'll explain that later.

At any rate, he's applied
for credit here at the store.

- Uh, wait just a minute now.

You say this friend of yours,
who is a counterfeiter,

is asking for credit?

- Oh, no, no.

No, no, no, he's
not a counterfeiter.

As a matter of fact, Mr.
Thornberry is a very fine man.

He's been my neighbor
for some years now,

and his son sent away for
this little outfit to make--

- Mr. Nelson, you've
done us a great favor.

Believe me.

We want to thank you
for tipping us off

to this deadbeat Thornberry.

Well naturally, we have
thrown his application

in the wastebasket.
- Oh, oh, oh--

- Mr. Nelson, it's a great
pleasure to meet an honest man.

- Oh, oh, I filled out the card.

See, that's what I
wanted to clear up.

- It's perfectly clear,
as far as I'm concerned.

My job would be so
much easier if there

were more men like you, sir.

I wonder if the police
shouldn't know about this man.

- Oh, no, no, no, no!

If you'll just let me explain.

This whole thing is a joke.

- A joke?

- Yes!

You see, Mr. Thornberry
is a fine man.

He's a good friend of mine.

I didn't mean anything
I put down on the card.

- I think I understand what's
bothering you, Mr. Nelson.

Obviously, a man of this
type could be dangerous.

However, all the
information you've given us

will be held in
strictest confidence.

He'll never know who
lowered the boom.

- Please, if you'll just
give me a moment to explain.

You see, Mr. Thornberry, as I
say, is quite a practical joke.

Now, he and I always play
little jokes on each other.

So when I got this
credit reference,

I thought it might
be funny to put down

a few devastating
things about my friend.

I'll guarantee he'd have
said the same thing about me

if he had the opportunity.

- Oh, don't you
worry about that.

His word doesn't carry
any weight around here.

There won't be any problem
with your charge account.

I'll just fill out
an application,

and we'll send it right through.

- No, no, that
won't be necessary.

- Oh, we appreciate
what you've done.

As of now, you have a charge
account with Wentworth's.

- Well, thank you very much,
but I didn't come down here

to open a charge account.

- Well, the least
we could do is let

you have one without
the usual red tape.

I'll tell you what.

On your way out, stop in the
sporting goods department

and pick yourself out
a nice little gift.

- No, no, no, no.

Believe me, you
don't understand.

- Mr. Nelson, I
hate to seem rude,

but, really, I'm very busy.

- Well, but what
about Mr. Thornberry?

- Don't you worry about that.

You'll be protected.

Your name won't
even be mentioned.

Thank you very much for the
information, Mr. Stool Pigeon.

- Not at all, huh?

Oh, I got a little
wood, but not very much.

OK, you guys keep looking.

Yeah, I'll see you later.

So long.

Oh, hiya, Pop.

- Hi, Dave.
- What's the matter?

Something wrong?

- Oh, uh, where's your mother?

- She and Mrs.
Thornberry went downtown.

- Oh.

- Gee, I haven't been able
to find any firewood yet.

- Oh.

It looks like you might have
to dip into your club treasury

and buy some.

- We spent all the money
from the party fund.

- Oh, you have a party fund?

- Yes, sir.

We split the treasury into
three funds: the party fund,

the recreation fund,
and the athletic fund.

We spent the party fund on a
big party we had last month.

- Oh.

Well, maybe you can borrow
some from the recreation fund

just this once.

- We spent the recreation
fund on the party, too.

We figured the party
was recreation.

- Oh.

Well, that leaves the athletic
fund then, doesn't it?

Or does it?

- Well, that's just it.

We spent the athletic
fund on the party, too.

After all, we did play games.

- Hi, David.

Hiya, Pop.

- Oh, hiya, son.

Here, help yourself.
I've had plenty.

- Thanks, Pop.
- Where have you been?

- I've been outside getting some
firewood for our party tonight.

- What do you mean "our party"?

- You wouldn't have a party
and not invite your old pal,

would you, old pal?

- This party's just for the guys
in our club and their dates.

- It just so happens that
I'm available tonight.

- It just so happens I've
got a date for tonight, too.

- Let me put it this way.

You wouldn't have
a party and not

invite your old pal and
his firewood, would you?

- Now, wait a minute.

Did you really
find some firewood?

- I sure did, boy.

I found plenty.

I just used the old initiative.

Now all I need is a hatchet.

- Well, look, Ricky, if you're
thinking of chopping down

the elm tree, forget it.

- No, I really found a lot.

- Uh, Ricky?

- Yeah?

- How would you like to
go to a party tonight?

- Oh, you really mean it?

- Sure, it's just like you said.

I wouldn't have a party
and not invite my old pal.

- And I don't have to sit
out in the car this time?

- No, you can come inside
with all the human beings.

You and your firewood are
cordially invited to our party.

Now, where is it?

- Well, come on outside.

I'll show you.

Oh, Pop, I forgot to tell you.

Mr. Thornberry's
looking for you.

- Oh.

Uh, uh, where is he?

- He's out in his front yard.

- Oh.

Uh, I think I'll go
out back for a while.

[door knocking]

- Oh, there you are, Oz.

- Oh, uh--

- I was looking
all over for you.

- Well, I-- I--

I was going to stop over
to your house, uh, tomorrow

or the next day.

- I wanted to see you about
the credit reference you wrote.

- Oh, well, Thorny,
surely, you know

I didn't mean any of that stuff.

I mean, I think you're
a wonderful guy.

- Yes, that's true.

- I couldn't ask for
a finer neighbor.

- OK, Oz, I can take the hint.

I'll pay you the five I owe you.

- No, no, no, no, no
rush about it, Thorny.

You're good for it and
you've been good for it

for all these years.

- No, Oz, I want to be prompt.

There you are.

1, 2, 3, 4--

- No, no, no, no.
That's enough, Thorny.

- Oh, just a minute.
- That's plenty.

I'm lucky to get this.

- 4.50, 5.
There you are.

- Real money.

Well, gee, thanks a lot, Thorny.

You didn't need to rush
this like this, really.

- Oz, what were some
of those things you

said in the credit reference?

- Oh, well, Thorny,
you know I was only

kidding about that stuff.

I didn't mean any of it.

- Wait a minute now.

What were some of those
flattering things?

Deadbeat, welcher,
untrustworthy.

- Oh, I was just--

- You know, if somebody
actually read that stuff,

they would think I
was a bad credit risk.

- Oh, gee, it's lucky you
have such a wonderful sense

of humor, Thorny.

I mean, actually, I
didn't mean to mail--

I mean--

- What do you mean?

- Uh, uh, sit down, Thorny,
but start laughing again.

- Wait, Oz.

Tell me something, honestly.

Did you mail the letter?

- Believe me, Thorny,
it was an accident.

I know it's a terrible
thing, and I'll

do anything I can to
make it up to you.

Here, here, take back your--

take back one of the dollars.

- Oh, no, Oz.

I couldn't think of it.

Oh, I'm glad you
mail the letter.

As a matter of fact, if
you hadn't, I would've.

- What are you talking about?

- Oh, Oz.

You see, this gives
me an opportunity

to play a dirty
trick on my wife.

I mean, not dirty trick,
just a funny little joke.

[chuckles]

- Well, I must admire
you as a guy who

likes to live dangerously.

Come on out in the kitchen.

I'll get you a little drink, and
you can tell me all about it.

- That's not a bad idea.

- Sit down, Thorny.

- Thanks.

- I have to hand it to you.

You have a wonderful
sense of humor.

Now, what was this little
joke you played on Catherine?

- Oh.

Well, this morning,
she mentioned

she was going
shopping with Harriet,

so I told her to go on down
to the new department store

and take advantage
of the big sale.

I said, "Buy the place
out and charge it."

Get that, Oz?
"Charge it?"

It's too bad I was such
a poor credit risk.

- Oh.

[laughs] Thorny, that's
an awful dirty trick

to play on Catherine.

I mean, the poor
girl goes down there

and tries to buy a few
things, and they tell her

she has no credit.

- Wait a minute.

Holy smokes, Oz!

- [laughs]

- Oz, Catherine must have
bought out the whole store!

- Well, isn't that what
you told her to do?

- Well, yes, but I didn't think
my credit was any good there.

- Well, frankly,
I didn't either,

but it looks as if they
decided to trust you

for a few small things.

- Few small things?

Oz, these few small things
are enough to drive a guy

right into bankruptcy.

- Really was a pretty
funny idea you had, Thorny.

It's a shame it backfired.

[laughs] You'll forgive
me for laughing,

but it is kind of funny.
- No, no.

Go right ahead.

I'd join you, but it's
a little difficult

to laugh with the walls of
the poor house closing in.

- Oh, Thorny, you don't
have a sense of humor.

Holy smokes!

What's that?

- What's what?

- Well, look over in my yard!

- Well, laughing boy, it
looks like Harriet's been

do a little shopping herself.

- Oh, this is fantastic!

Look at all this stuff.

It looks like a warehouse!

- Boy, it must have
been a wonderful sale.

- Uh, Harriet?

- Oh, hi.

- Hey, Catherine and I had the
best time down at the store

today.
- Yeah, so I noticed.

You kind of lost your
head, didn't you?

- Well, no.

I only bought a few things,
very practical things

too that we need.

- Oh, yes, like a new piano.

We only have one
for the living room.

We need one for the
den, desperately.

- What are you talking about?

- Pop, do you know
where the hatchet is?

- Hmm?

Oh, yes, it's right
out in the garage, son.

- Boy, the little man
here really came through.

You should see all
the firewood we got.

- Yeah, I don't
mess around, boy!

- That's fine.
Good for you.

- We got a whole
bunch of old crates

from the new department store.

They even delivered 'em for us.

- Well, that's swell, Dave.

Look, right now,
I'm shouting at--

I mean, I'm having
a little discussion

with your mother on something
that's rather important.

- Oh, pardon me.

- Wait a minute.

What did you just say, David?

- I said, "Oh, pardon me."

- Yes, yes, yes.

I mean, did you say that
those crates outside are empty

and the department store
gave them to Ricky?

- Yes, sir, for a bonfire.

- Oh!

Well, congratulations, boys!

- Oh, thanks, Pop.
- Wonderful!

Fine!
- Come on, Rick.

Let's chop 'em up.

- What's the matter, dear?

- Nothing, Harriet.

Just a mild case of shock.

I saw all those
big crates outside,

and I thought you'd
gone on a buying spree.

- So that's it.

Well, you can relax.

I bought a very
inexpensive dress.

- Oh, this is a dress?

- Well, of course, it's
the sort of a dress

you should wear a hat with.

- Oh, oh.

Well, a hat and a dress.

I'll settle for that.

- Well, of course,
I know you wouldn't

want me to go barefoot.

- Oh, well, a hat, and a
dress, and a pair of shoes.

Say, after the scare I just
got, I'd settle for about five

more items.
- Oh, fine.

I'll go shopping again tomorrow.

- Well...

- I think I did
pretty well by you.

Don't you?

- Yes, I think
you did very well.

Did Catherine buy anything?

- Well, not too much.

You know, she had trouble
with her charge account.

- Trouble?

- The credit manager
wouldn't say what it was,

but he was very
evasive about it.

They'll probably straighten
it out tomorrow, though.

- Oh, oh, yes.

Yes, it must have been just
some little, uh, mix-up.

You know, that
happens sometimes.

- Mhm.

And sometimes, practical
jokers accidentally

mail credit references
that say terrible things

about their next-door neighbors.

- How did you find
out about that?

- Well, for one thing,
the store detective

kept following
Catherine all afternoon.

- I know I don't sound
like it, but, honest, I'm

sorry it happened.

- So am I. And since it
was mainly your fault,

I told Catherine to use
your charge account.

- Oh, but you say she
didn't buy much, though?

- Well, not right at first, but
she made up for it later on.

It's all right.

I think she intends
to pay you back.

- Oh, yeah, sure.

Uh, not that I'm too
worried about it,

but when do you think
she will pay me?

- Oh, pretty soon.

Will's home printing
up the money right now.

- Hi, Oz.
- Oh, hiya, Thorny.

I've been looking for you.
Where have you been?

- Down at the new
department store.

I called and made an appointment
with a credit manager.

I figured I'd better get
this charge account business

straightened out right now.
- Oh, oh.

Yeah, that's a good idea.

How'd you make out?

- Oh, fine, fine.

I think everything
will be OK now.

- Oh, good.

You explained what happened?

- Oh, sure.

We had a nice chat.

The four of us had
a great big laugh.

- Oh.

[laughs] What do you
mean the four of you?

- Well, myself, the credit
manager, and the two

policemen he called in.

[ending theme]

- Next week, "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet,"

starring the entire
Nelson famil--

Ozzie, Harriet,
David, and Ricky--

will be brought to
you by Antizyme,

the new toothpaste that gives
you all-day immunity to tooth

decay acids.

- Well, good night, folks.
We'll see you again next week.

- Good night.

And remember, always look
to Hotpoint finest first.

- Yes, sir.

That's what I always say, boy.

- What do you always
say, little man?

- Always love to Hotpoint
for the finest first.

- Hal Smith played the
part of the credit manager.

This is Verne Smith speaking.

Don't forget that a
completely different episode

of "The Adventures
of Ozzie and Harriet"

is heard every Friday
night on radio.

Consult your newspaper for
time and radio station.

[theme music]