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1
00:00:01,937 --> 00:00:05,045
[ whistling sprightly tune ]
2
00:00:09,786 --> 00:00:12,426
Starring andy griffith...
3
00:00:12,458 --> 00:00:15,432
With ronny howard.
4
00:00:15,464 --> 00:00:19,472
Also starring don knotts.
5
00:00:20,842 --> 00:00:23,180
Sandwich sure
Hit the spot.
Didn't it, though?
6
00:00:23,215 --> 00:00:24,783
I was about to starve
To death.
7
00:00:24,816 --> 00:00:26,186
I don't know about you.
8
00:00:26,221 --> 00:00:27,623
Good fishin' hole,
Though.
9
00:00:27,656 --> 00:00:29,793
We ought to try
To slip over there again.
10
00:00:29,826 --> 00:00:32,166
Let me see them pretty things
One more time.
11
00:00:32,199 --> 00:00:33,534
Boy, you did do
All right.
12
00:00:33,568 --> 00:00:35,339
Sure, three trout
And two perch.
13
00:00:35,371 --> 00:00:37,276
Yeah, together with
What me opie got,
14
00:00:37,308 --> 00:00:38,711
We can have
A fine fish fry.
15
00:00:38,745 --> 00:00:41,184
And don't forget what
Barney will be bringing in.
16
00:00:41,217 --> 00:00:42,719
That's right.
Where is that boy?
17
00:00:42,753 --> 00:00:43,855
Hey, barney!
18
00:00:43,887 --> 00:00:45,225
Barney!
19
00:00:45,259 --> 00:00:48,365
Barney: what?
Come on!
20
00:00:48,397 --> 00:00:49,867
Him and that
Secret hole of his.
21
00:00:49,899 --> 00:00:51,903
For crying out loud,
You leaving so soon?
22
00:00:51,936 --> 00:00:53,375
Well, it's about time.
23
00:00:53,407 --> 00:00:54,909
We've been here
Three and a half hours.
24
00:00:54,942 --> 00:00:56,814
You do all right
At that secret place?
25
00:00:56,846 --> 00:00:58,285
Yeah.
Seems awful light.
26
00:00:58,318 --> 00:00:59,852
I done all right.
Well, let's see.
27
00:00:59,887 --> 00:01:01,491
I said I done all right.
28
00:01:01,523 --> 00:01:03,328
Well, what did you catch,
Perch or trout? Oh!
29
00:01:03,361 --> 00:01:05,332
The trouble with you
Barbers is you're always
30
00:01:05,364 --> 00:01:07,403
Sticking your nose
In other people's business.
31
00:01:07,435 --> 00:01:09,440
Barney, you know we agreed
To pool our catches
32
00:01:09,473 --> 00:01:11,276
For the fish fry --
Now, let us see it.
33
00:01:11,310 --> 00:01:12,613
We'll see it
Sooner or later.
34
00:01:12,646 --> 00:01:14,282
[ stops laughing ]
35
00:01:14,316 --> 00:01:17,689
Oh, boy, I bet your pole
Was just a-bendin'
36
00:01:17,723 --> 00:01:19,960
And a-quiverin'
Over that.
37
00:01:19,992 --> 00:01:22,399
A real monster
Of the deep!
38
00:01:22,432 --> 00:01:24,636
[ laughs ]
Are we going?
Let's go.
39
00:01:24,670 --> 00:01:26,474
Old frog man.
40
00:01:30,682 --> 00:01:31,950
Oo-wee,
Did you see that?
41
00:01:31,984 --> 00:01:33,587
Speed limit
Along here is 45.
42
00:01:33,620 --> 00:01:34,656
That car was doing 70!
43
00:01:34,690 --> 00:01:36,294
Andy: come on!
44
00:01:36,327 --> 00:01:37,796
Get in!
45
00:01:42,638 --> 00:01:45,678
[ siren wailing ]
46
00:01:51,656 --> 00:01:55,265
[ tires screeching ]
47
00:02:07,988 --> 00:02:12,432
Sheriff taylor.
48
00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:13,768
Is something the matter?
49
00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:14,902
Yes, ma'am.
50
00:02:14,936 --> 00:02:16,574
May I see your
Driver's license?
51
00:02:16,606 --> 00:02:18,009
"Something
The matter"?
52
00:02:18,042 --> 00:02:19,447
That's
A good one.
53
00:02:19,479 --> 00:02:22,485
"Elizabeth crowley,
54
00:02:22,519 --> 00:02:23,754
Washington, d.C."
55
00:02:23,788 --> 00:02:26,426
You don't set
A very good example
56
00:02:26,461 --> 00:02:28,398
For somebody that lives
Right in the capital of
57
00:02:28,430 --> 00:02:30,335
The united states, do you?
You were speeding.
58
00:02:30,369 --> 00:02:31,837
I was?
59
00:02:31,871 --> 00:02:33,038
Yes, ma'am.
60
00:02:33,073 --> 00:02:35,744
I'm so sorry.
I didn't mean to.
61
00:02:35,778 --> 00:02:37,483
It's these new cars.
62
00:02:37,516 --> 00:02:40,355
They make the engines
So powerful.
63
00:02:40,389 --> 00:02:43,461
One little touch
And they just... Zoom!
64
00:02:43,495 --> 00:02:46,467
I guess you have to watch out
For that, all right.
65
00:02:46,501 --> 00:02:47,735
Thank you.
66
00:02:47,768 --> 00:02:49,706
In the future,
I'll be much more careful.
67
00:02:49,739 --> 00:02:50,774
Yeah.
68
00:02:50,808 --> 00:02:52,578
Wait, hold on now.
69
00:02:52,613 --> 00:02:55,452
I'm glad you're going to be
More careful in the future,
70
00:02:55,485 --> 00:02:57,655
But I got to give you
This ticket for the present.
71
00:03:01,731 --> 00:03:04,737
But this says to appear
Next week.
72
00:03:04,770 --> 00:03:05,838
Sorry, ma'am.
73
00:03:05,872 --> 00:03:08,009
Officer, I'm in a great hurry.
74
00:03:08,042 --> 00:03:10,949
I just finished a job
For my magazine
75
00:03:10,981 --> 00:03:13,987
And I've got to get back
To the office.
76
00:03:14,020 --> 00:03:17,563
Couldn't we just forget it
This time, officer?
77
00:03:17,595 --> 00:03:18,664
Hmm?
78
00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:21,168
I'm sorry, ma'am.
79
00:03:24,107 --> 00:03:25,744
Oh, I see.
80
00:03:25,779 --> 00:03:29,552
I've run into one of those
Small-town speedtraps.
81
00:03:29,587 --> 00:03:30,621
I beg your pardon?
82
00:03:30,655 --> 00:03:32,157
Oh, I've heard
About them.
83
00:03:32,190 --> 00:03:33,628
You just lie in wait
84
00:03:33,660 --> 00:03:36,099
For the first out-of-state car
You can bleed.
85
00:03:36,132 --> 00:03:39,205
We don't have speedtraps
In mayberry.
86
00:03:39,238 --> 00:03:41,511
We don't operate that way.
87
00:03:41,544 --> 00:03:43,814
You have a justice
Of the peace in mayberry?
88
00:03:43,847 --> 00:03:44,950
Yes, ma'am.
89
00:03:44,983 --> 00:03:45,985
Then I'd rather
90
00:03:46,019 --> 00:03:47,688
Discuss this with him.
91
00:03:47,723 --> 00:03:48,890
If you don't mind.
92
00:03:48,924 --> 00:03:50,694
I don't mind.
93
00:03:52,698 --> 00:03:54,035
Court's in session.
94
00:03:54,068 --> 00:03:56,674
You?
95
00:03:56,706 --> 00:03:59,846
Deputy fife, what's
The charge here?
96
00:03:59,879 --> 00:04:02,285
Doing 70
In a 45-mile zone.
97
00:04:02,318 --> 00:04:05,290
Well, the fine
For that is, oh...
98
00:04:05,324 --> 00:04:07,928
Ten dollars
Ought to do it.
99
00:04:07,962 --> 00:04:08,998
Ten dollars?
100
00:04:09,030 --> 00:04:10,601
That's the usual fine.
101
00:04:10,634 --> 00:04:12,271
Oh, I'm not
Fighting it.
102
00:04:12,305 --> 00:04:14,642
I'm just surprised
It's so low.
103
00:04:14,676 --> 00:04:17,782
After all, when you have
A fool-proof system...
104
00:04:17,816 --> 00:04:20,253
What do you mean,
"Fool-proof system"?
105
00:04:20,287 --> 00:04:21,656
Oh, come on, now.
106
00:04:21,691 --> 00:04:23,225
When the arresting officer
107
00:04:23,259 --> 00:04:25,765
Is also the man
Who tries the case,
108
00:04:25,798 --> 00:04:28,638
I have a feeling
You don't lose too often.
109
00:04:28,670 --> 00:04:31,209
Whoa, now, hold on there,
Just a minute.
110
00:04:31,241 --> 00:04:34,048
You wouldn't by any chance
Be insinuating
111
00:04:34,081 --> 00:04:37,354
That this court is prejudiced
In any way, would you?
112
00:04:37,387 --> 00:04:39,693
I'm not a child, sheriff.
113
00:04:39,727 --> 00:04:41,697
Then you are insinuating.
114
00:04:41,731 --> 00:04:44,936
That'll be ten dollars more
For contempt.
115
00:04:44,969 --> 00:04:46,205
I should have known.
116
00:04:46,239 --> 00:04:48,977
That first ten dollars
Was just a starter.
117
00:04:49,010 --> 00:04:51,382
You have no intentions
Of letting me go
118
00:04:51,415 --> 00:04:53,788
Until you drain me dry,
Have you?
119
00:04:53,820 --> 00:04:55,223
You're contempted
Again.
120
00:04:55,257 --> 00:04:56,627
Another ten dollars.
121
00:04:56,661 --> 00:04:58,830
Another ten dollars,
Another ten dollars.
122
00:04:58,865 --> 00:04:59,899
Why stop there?
123
00:04:59,932 --> 00:05:01,771
Why not see
How much I've got
124
00:05:01,803 --> 00:05:02,905
And take it all?
125
00:05:02,939 --> 00:05:04,877
Jesse james would.
Why not you?
126
00:05:04,909 --> 00:05:08,048
Lady, you're practically calling
Justice taylor a thief!
127
00:05:08,082 --> 00:05:09,318
That's right.
128
00:05:09,352 --> 00:05:11,691
And you've insulted
The dignity of my robes.
129
00:05:11,723 --> 00:05:12,926
Now, you got any idea
130
00:05:12,959 --> 00:05:15,162
What the fine is
For robe-insulting?
131
00:05:15,197 --> 00:05:16,164
Don't tell me.
132
00:05:16,199 --> 00:05:17,435
Another ten dollars.
133
00:05:17,467 --> 00:05:20,140
No, that's a biggie.
134
00:05:20,173 --> 00:05:21,976
That 'uns $30.
135
00:05:22,011 --> 00:05:24,683
And that brings us up
To the grand total of, um...
136
00:05:24,717 --> 00:05:26,284
Deputy, you been
Keeping track?
137
00:05:26,319 --> 00:05:29,392
Um... Well, let's see.
138
00:05:29,425 --> 00:05:33,333
30 and ten and ten
And ten is, um...
139
00:05:33,367 --> 00:05:36,071
60.
60.
140
00:05:36,104 --> 00:05:37,943
Andy: see how it mounts up?
141
00:05:37,975 --> 00:05:39,747
But in view of the fact
142
00:05:39,780 --> 00:05:42,953
That you undoubtedly spoke
Without thinking,
143
00:05:42,985 --> 00:05:45,959
We can settle the whole thing
For, oh...
144
00:05:45,991 --> 00:05:47,362
$25 ought to do it.
145
00:05:47,395 --> 00:05:49,733
Just pay
The deputy.
146
00:05:49,767 --> 00:05:50,902
I will not.
147
00:05:52,136 --> 00:05:53,506
How's that?
148
00:05:53,539 --> 00:05:55,210
I refuse to be railroaded.
149
00:05:55,243 --> 00:05:56,413
I won't pay a cent.
150
00:05:56,445 --> 00:05:58,885
You mean you're pleading
"Not guilty"?
151
00:05:58,918 --> 00:06:00,721
That's exactly what I plead.
152
00:06:00,721 --> 00:06:04,295
And I demand a trial before
An honest-to-goodness judge.
153
00:06:04,328 --> 00:06:07,267
Well, we do have mayor's court.
154
00:06:07,301 --> 00:06:10,107
Fine, mayor's court.
I'll appear there.
155
00:06:10,140 --> 00:06:11,375
All right,
156
00:06:11,409 --> 00:06:13,446
And you're entitled
To legal counsel
157
00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:15,050
Of your own choosing.
158
00:06:15,083 --> 00:06:17,422
We got some fine attorneys
Here in mayberry.
159
00:06:17,454 --> 00:06:19,458
Barney, is rafe peterson
Available?
160
00:06:19,492 --> 00:06:22,030
I don't know, andy.
Things is kind of slow.
161
00:06:22,064 --> 00:06:24,401
Last I heard,
He was selling aluminum siding.
162
00:06:24,436 --> 00:06:27,007
Andy: that's right,
That's right.
163
00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:28,878
She might get
Clarence polk, though.
164
00:06:28,910 --> 00:06:30,981
He don't start umpiring
Ball games till june.
165
00:06:31,015 --> 00:06:32,317
If you don't mind,
166
00:06:32,351 --> 00:06:35,323
I'll pass up these
Brilliant barristers of yours
167
00:06:35,357 --> 00:06:36,961
And be my own counsel.
168
00:06:36,994 --> 00:06:38,095
Fine, fine.
169
00:06:38,128 --> 00:06:39,598
Uh, there's one thing
170
00:06:39,631 --> 00:06:42,405
That I did forget
To mention.
171
00:06:42,438 --> 00:06:45,077
Mayor's court
Don't take up
172
00:06:45,109 --> 00:06:47,246
Till, uh...
Tomorrow.
173
00:06:47,280 --> 00:06:50,119
I'll have to keep you
In jail.
174
00:06:50,152 --> 00:06:52,557
Very well.
175
00:06:54,997 --> 00:06:59,070
Ma'am, we're not prepared
For lady customers here.
176
00:06:59,105 --> 00:07:00,841
Then you're letting me go.
177
00:07:00,841 --> 00:07:02,645
Well, no...
178
00:07:02,678 --> 00:07:05,117
But you sure would save us
A heap of trouble
179
00:07:05,149 --> 00:07:07,989
All the way around
If you'd just pay the fine.
180
00:07:08,022 --> 00:07:13,466
Sheriff, I have no intention
Of paying one red cent.
181
00:07:13,499 --> 00:07:14,937
All right.
182
00:07:14,969 --> 00:07:17,206
Be a stubborn female.
183
00:07:17,241 --> 00:07:20,047
I can be just as stubborn.
184
00:07:20,079 --> 00:07:22,350
We'll make
Accommodations.
185
00:07:22,384 --> 00:07:24,020
Barney, lock her up
186
00:07:24,055 --> 00:07:26,291
And buy some
Pink towels.
187
00:07:58,023 --> 00:08:00,561
It's locked!
188
00:08:00,594 --> 00:08:03,265
Aunt bee, open up!
It's us!
189
00:08:03,299 --> 00:08:04,702
Aunt bee:
Just a minute.
190
00:08:04,735 --> 00:08:09,410
You can't come in now,
We're not decent.
191
00:08:09,445 --> 00:08:12,284
Can't even get in
Our own office.
192
00:08:13,686 --> 00:08:16,692
It's all right,
You can come in now.
193
00:08:16,726 --> 00:08:19,330
Well, thanks a whole lot.
194
00:08:21,769 --> 00:08:24,274
Aunt bee,
What's going on here?
195
00:08:24,308 --> 00:08:26,712
Well, liz is just
Drying out a few things.
196
00:08:26,746 --> 00:08:28,049
Oh, boy.
197
00:08:28,083 --> 00:08:29,752
Now, what did I do
With that list?
198
00:08:29,785 --> 00:08:31,523
Oh, it's in your purse,
Aunt bee.
199
00:08:31,556 --> 00:08:33,425
Oh... Yes,
Here we are.
200
00:08:33,458 --> 00:08:36,398
Barney, we want
These things right away.
201
00:08:36,431 --> 00:08:38,169
Please?
202
00:08:38,203 --> 00:08:39,270
Nail polish?
203
00:08:39,305 --> 00:08:41,508
O-dee cologne?
Aw, come on.
204
00:08:41,543 --> 00:08:43,412
Aunt bee, it ain't part
Of our service
205
00:08:43,445 --> 00:08:45,317
To run errands
For prisoners.
206
00:08:45,349 --> 00:08:47,787
Well, you've never had
A female prisoner before.
207
00:08:47,822 --> 00:08:49,191
Come along, barney.
208
00:08:49,225 --> 00:08:50,661
Drop me off home.
209
00:08:50,694 --> 00:08:52,832
I have
To get running.
210
00:08:57,406 --> 00:08:59,145
Well...
211
00:08:59,178 --> 00:09:00,412
You sure got aunt bee
212
00:09:00,446 --> 00:09:02,617
Eating out of your hands,
Ain'tcha?
213
00:09:02,652 --> 00:09:04,288
Oh, please
Believe me.
214
00:09:04,321 --> 00:09:06,459
I wouldn't take
Advantage of her.
215
00:09:06,492 --> 00:09:09,599
It's just that she's a very
Sweet and thoughtful person.
216
00:09:09,631 --> 00:09:12,136
Mm. She's that, all right.
217
00:09:13,473 --> 00:09:16,345
I think it was very sweet
And thoughtful of you
218
00:09:16,378 --> 00:09:18,515
To send her over
To take care of me.
219
00:09:18,548 --> 00:09:19,719
You didn't have to.
220
00:09:19,751 --> 00:09:22,523
A female prisoner
Has to have a matron.
221
00:09:22,556 --> 00:09:23,660
That's the law.
222
00:09:23,694 --> 00:09:26,331
Well... All the same,
223
00:09:26,365 --> 00:09:29,270
I do appreciate it.
224
00:09:35,784 --> 00:09:37,421
I'm sorry.
225
00:09:37,453 --> 00:09:40,293
I'm afraid I've kind of
Upset things around here.
226
00:09:40,327 --> 00:09:43,633
I'll go along with that.
227
00:09:43,667 --> 00:09:47,441
Honestly, I wish this whole
Thing had never happened.
228
00:09:48,643 --> 00:09:50,247
Do you mean that?
229
00:09:52,685 --> 00:09:54,587
Well, that makes
Two of us.
230
00:09:54,621 --> 00:09:56,424
I wish it hadn't
Happened myself.
231
00:09:56,459 --> 00:09:59,265
I guess it's just a case
Of too much bull-headedness.
232
00:09:59,298 --> 00:10:01,201
It would seem so.
233
00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:04,507
Look, couldn't we
Act like grown-ups
234
00:10:04,541 --> 00:10:06,311
And start all over again?
235
00:10:06,345 --> 00:10:07,947
I'm for that.
236
00:10:07,982 --> 00:10:08,949
Oh, good.
237
00:10:08,984 --> 00:10:10,453
Then you let me out,
238
00:10:10,486 --> 00:10:12,557
I'll pay the fine
And be on my way.
239
00:10:12,591 --> 00:10:16,532
Now you're talking
Like real folks.
240
00:10:16,565 --> 00:10:18,502
[ laughs ]
241
00:10:18,536 --> 00:10:20,473
Old aunt bee and barney
Will be surprised
242
00:10:20,506 --> 00:10:22,745
When they come back and find
Everything's settled.
243
00:10:22,778 --> 00:10:23,879
I should think so.
244
00:10:23,914 --> 00:10:25,350
Shouldn't take me
Long to pack.
245
00:10:25,382 --> 00:10:27,287
I know you'll be glad
To get on the way.
246
00:10:27,321 --> 00:10:28,990
Yeah, this is the way
To handle things.
247
00:10:29,023 --> 00:10:31,930
As I recall,
The fine was $10.
248
00:10:31,962 --> 00:10:33,065
There you are.
249
00:10:33,097 --> 00:10:36,472
Well, that was
The original fine,
250
00:10:36,504 --> 00:10:39,645
But as you recall,
The fine is now $25.
251
00:10:39,678 --> 00:10:42,785
Oh, you're not going to
Hold me to that.
252
00:10:42,818 --> 00:10:44,856
Well, as a servant
Of the people,
253
00:10:44,889 --> 00:10:46,860
I have to,
And the fine is $25.
254
00:10:46,893 --> 00:10:50,767
What were you saying
About bull-headedness?
255
00:10:50,801 --> 00:10:53,874
I was referring to your
Bull-headedness, not mine.
256
00:10:53,907 --> 00:10:55,911
My--
257
00:10:55,944 --> 00:10:57,747
Let me tell you something,
Sheriff.
258
00:10:57,781 --> 00:10:59,718
I am going to win this case.
259
00:10:59,751 --> 00:11:02,624
If not here,
I'll appeal to a higher court.
260
00:11:02,656 --> 00:11:05,496
If necessary, I'll...Take it
To the supreme court!
261
00:11:05,530 --> 00:11:08,102
Suit yourself, lady,
But you sure are
262
00:11:08,134 --> 00:11:11,007
Taking the hard way
Back to washington.
263
00:11:27,173 --> 00:11:28,443
[ door opens ]
264
00:11:28,476 --> 00:11:30,011
Oh, barney,
I'm glad you're back.
265
00:11:30,046 --> 00:11:31,682
Take over here,
Will you?
266
00:11:31,715 --> 00:11:33,118
I want to go see floyd.
267
00:11:33,151 --> 00:11:35,523
I want to alert him
To stand by as a witness.
268
00:11:35,557 --> 00:11:36,926
Okay.
269
00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:39,932
Oh, you'll be called on
To testify, too,
270
00:11:39,966 --> 00:11:41,168
Along with opie.
271
00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:44,174
That ought to shut the lid
Pretty tight.
272
00:11:48,147 --> 00:11:53,859
He's got the cards all neatly
Stacked against me, hasn't he?
273
00:11:53,893 --> 00:11:55,196
Just doing a job,
Ma'am, that's all.
274
00:11:55,228 --> 00:11:56,565
Thank you.
275
00:11:56,599 --> 00:11:57,701
Uh, tell me...
276
00:11:57,734 --> 00:11:59,571
Did you actually
See me speeding?
277
00:11:59,605 --> 00:12:02,611
Oh, ma'am, a witness ain't
Allowed to discuss the case
278
00:12:02,643 --> 00:12:05,016
With the prisoner
He's witnessin' against.
279
00:12:05,049 --> 00:12:07,620
Well, thank you...
Sheriff.
280
00:12:07,654 --> 00:12:09,691
Oh, I'm not the sheriff.
281
00:12:09,724 --> 00:12:11,160
That other man is?
282
00:12:11,194 --> 00:12:13,131
Yes, ma'am,
He's the high sheriff.
283
00:12:13,164 --> 00:12:14,634
I'm the deputy.
284
00:12:14,667 --> 00:12:15,838
But that's amazing.
285
00:12:15,871 --> 00:12:17,807
I certainly
Would have guessed
286
00:12:17,842 --> 00:12:19,545
You to be
The top man.
287
00:12:19,578 --> 00:12:21,783
Oh, really?
288
00:12:21,815 --> 00:12:23,719
Uh, say...
289
00:12:23,753 --> 00:12:26,190
Would you mind?
290
00:12:26,224 --> 00:12:27,293
[ gasps ]
291
00:12:27,325 --> 00:12:30,299
Oh, goodness,
Not only attractive,
292
00:12:30,331 --> 00:12:31,835
But so strong.
293
00:12:31,870 --> 00:12:33,573
Uh, but I guess
294
00:12:33,606 --> 00:12:36,278
You have
To keep in shape.
295
00:12:36,310 --> 00:12:39,184
You must face plenty of risks
Being a police officer.
296
00:12:40,752 --> 00:12:41,855
Yeah, well...
297
00:12:41,889 --> 00:12:44,595
Every time you walk
Out that door,
298
00:12:44,628 --> 00:12:47,734
Don't you wonder
If you're ever coming back?
299
00:12:50,139 --> 00:12:53,145
Well, we can learn
To live with danger.
300
00:12:55,049 --> 00:12:58,656
Well, your wife must suffer
Some anxious moments.
301
00:12:58,689 --> 00:13:01,293
I don't have a wife.
302
00:13:01,328 --> 00:13:03,966
You're not married?
303
00:13:06,071 --> 00:13:08,709
I can't believe that
A man like you
304
00:13:08,742 --> 00:13:10,948
Hasn't been
Snapped up by now.
305
00:13:10,981 --> 00:13:13,284
Well, I have a girl,
Thelma lou.
306
00:13:13,318 --> 00:13:14,989
Just, uh, one girl?
307
00:13:15,021 --> 00:13:16,158
That's all.
308
00:13:16,190 --> 00:13:18,763
Oh, come on, now,
A man like you?
309
00:13:18,795 --> 00:13:21,134
There must be
More than one.
310
00:13:21,168 --> 00:13:22,235
Well...
311
00:13:22,270 --> 00:13:24,875
There is juanita
Down at the diner.
312
00:13:24,909 --> 00:13:26,344
I knew it, I knew it.
313
00:13:26,377 --> 00:13:30,219
And plenty more who'd like
To be your girl, I'll bet.
314
00:13:30,251 --> 00:13:31,288
Plenty more.
315
00:13:31,320 --> 00:13:34,093
Not so many as you might think.
316
00:13:34,127 --> 00:13:36,665
I... Try to discourage 'em.
317
00:13:36,699 --> 00:13:39,839
Because you don't want them
To be hurt.
318
00:13:39,871 --> 00:13:42,109
That's right -- if there's one
Thing I don't want to do,
319
00:13:42,143 --> 00:13:43,312
It's hurt
A lot of women.
320
00:13:45,851 --> 00:13:47,353
Say... Do you sing?
321
00:13:47,385 --> 00:13:48,355
Hmm?
322
00:13:48,387 --> 00:13:50,760
Well, it just
Struck me...
323
00:13:50,793 --> 00:13:53,232
You bear an amazing
Resemblance
324
00:13:53,265 --> 00:13:54,801
To frank sinatra.
325
00:13:54,836 --> 00:13:58,709
The same magnetism,
The same appeal.
326
00:13:58,743 --> 00:14:00,948
Noticed that, did you?
327
00:14:00,980 --> 00:14:01,681
You've been told that before?
328
00:14:01,681 --> 00:14:05,056
No, but...
I've noticed it myself.
329
00:14:05,088 --> 00:14:09,230
Frankie and me are sort of birds
Of a feather, you might say.
330
00:14:09,264 --> 00:14:10,398
[ chuckling ]
331
00:14:10,432 --> 00:14:12,235
Well, I'd like to stay
332
00:14:12,270 --> 00:14:15,109
And chat with you
Some more, ma'am,
333
00:14:15,141 --> 00:14:16,879
But I got work to do.
334
00:14:21,088 --> 00:14:23,525
* it's a quarter to three
335
00:14:23,557 --> 00:14:26,398
* there's no one in the place
336
00:14:26,430 --> 00:14:28,868
* except you and me...
337
00:14:31,809 --> 00:14:34,179
Aunt bee? I just had
A few minutes.
338
00:14:34,213 --> 00:14:36,483
I thought I'd stop by
Just to see
339
00:14:36,518 --> 00:14:38,856
How the case
Was coming along.
340
00:14:38,890 --> 00:14:40,426
Oh, good.
341
00:14:44,868 --> 00:14:45,938
Hello, there.
342
00:14:47,239 --> 00:14:48,944
Aunt bee, tell her
She can't talk to me.
343
00:14:48,977 --> 00:14:50,412
I'm a witness
Against her.
344
00:14:50,446 --> 00:14:53,251
He can't talk to you because
He's a witness against you.
345
00:14:53,285 --> 00:14:56,090
Oh, I don't want
To talk about the case.
346
00:14:56,123 --> 00:14:58,428
I'm, uh, interested
In his profession.
347
00:15:06,043 --> 00:15:07,412
You're a barber?
348
00:15:07,446 --> 00:15:10,418
Uh-huh. Floyd's
Tonsorial parlor.
349
00:15:10,451 --> 00:15:12,957
Floyd lawson,
Proprietor.
350
00:15:12,991 --> 00:15:14,426
I'm floyd lawson.
351
00:15:14,459 --> 00:15:16,298
How fortunate for me.
352
00:15:16,331 --> 00:15:17,566
Now, I wonder...
353
00:15:17,599 --> 00:15:20,339
Would you mind
Combing out my hair?
354
00:15:20,372 --> 00:15:23,445
[stuttering] No-no-no,
I couldn't...Really...
355
00:15:23,477 --> 00:15:24,580
Well, why not?
356
00:15:24,613 --> 00:15:26,283
Well, I'm
A man barber.
357
00:15:26,317 --> 00:15:28,554
I've never combed out
A woman's hair in all my life.
358
00:15:28,588 --> 00:15:29,891
No, I couldn't.
359
00:15:29,925 --> 00:15:31,461
Oh, of course you could.
360
00:15:31,493 --> 00:15:35,036
Why, men make the best
Hairdressers in the world.
361
00:15:35,069 --> 00:15:36,603
If they have the touch.
362
00:15:36,638 --> 00:15:39,276
And I'm sure you do.
363
00:15:39,309 --> 00:15:40,981
I can tell.
364
00:15:41,014 --> 00:15:44,420
Such artistic hands.
365
00:15:47,325 --> 00:15:48,929
Please?
366
00:15:48,964 --> 00:15:51,633
Oh, no, no, no...
367
00:15:51,668 --> 00:15:54,174
I-I... Well...
368
00:15:54,206 --> 00:15:56,377
[chuckling]
Well...
369
00:15:56,411 --> 00:15:58,115
[ clears throat ]
370
00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:10,672
Oh, he does have the touch.
371
00:16:10,705 --> 00:16:13,077
Floyd: that's good,
Huh?
An artist.
372
00:16:13,111 --> 00:16:17,485
A real artist.
373
00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:19,589
The court calls
The first witness,
374
00:16:19,624 --> 00:16:21,427
Floyd lawson,
To the stand.
375
00:16:21,461 --> 00:16:26,370
[ all talking ]
376
00:16:26,403 --> 00:16:28,008
Uh, miss crowley,
377
00:16:28,042 --> 00:16:29,644
Would you like to start
The questioning?
378
00:16:29,676 --> 00:16:32,150
Yes, please.
Thank you.
379
00:16:35,056 --> 00:16:36,158
Mr. Lawson,
380
00:16:36,191 --> 00:16:39,030
Would you tell us,
In your own words,
381
00:16:39,064 --> 00:16:40,465
What happened?
382
00:16:40,499 --> 00:16:42,469
What happened when?
383
00:16:42,503 --> 00:16:45,375
When the prisoner was given
A citation for speeding.
384
00:16:45,408 --> 00:16:47,312
You ought to know,
You was there.
385
00:16:47,345 --> 00:16:49,084
It's not your turn yet,
Andy!
386
00:16:49,117 --> 00:16:50,418
Uh, proceed, miss crowley.
387
00:16:50,451 --> 00:16:52,255
Thank you, your honor.
388
00:16:52,290 --> 00:16:54,694
Not at all.
Now, just tell us
389
00:16:54,727 --> 00:16:56,298
Exactly what you saw.
390
00:16:56,330 --> 00:16:58,767
Well, now, that's going
To be kind of tough,
391
00:16:58,802 --> 00:17:01,273
'cause it's hard to say
Exactly what I saw,
392
00:17:01,308 --> 00:17:04,446
But, you see, my glasses have
Just been giving me so much...
393
00:17:04,479 --> 00:17:06,584
I really should
Have them checked.
394
00:17:06,618 --> 00:17:08,287
Haven't they,
Aunt bee?
395
00:17:09,723 --> 00:17:11,628
No, floyd,
She's over there.
396
00:17:11,660 --> 00:17:13,731
Oh, come on, floyd!
397
00:17:13,764 --> 00:17:15,735
Andy, please!
398
00:17:15,768 --> 00:17:18,407
In other words,
Mr. Lawson,
399
00:17:18,442 --> 00:17:21,314
You are a man
Of integrity who,
400
00:17:21,347 --> 00:17:23,284
If he's not sure
Of what he saw,
401
00:17:23,318 --> 00:17:26,423
Refuses to bear witness
Against a person
402
00:17:26,458 --> 00:17:28,861
Who may be...
Totally innocent.
403
00:17:28,895 --> 00:17:30,332
Oh, y-yeah.
404
00:17:30,365 --> 00:17:33,205
Oh, I've got a lot
Of integrity that way.
405
00:17:33,237 --> 00:17:36,378
No more questions.
406
00:17:36,410 --> 00:17:38,847
Your witness, sheriff.
407
00:17:38,882 --> 00:17:40,485
Never mind.
408
00:17:42,223 --> 00:17:43,225
[ all talking ]
409
00:17:43,258 --> 00:17:44,794
Quiet, quiet.
410
00:17:44,827 --> 00:17:46,463
Quiet, quiet!
411
00:17:46,497 --> 00:17:48,601
Uh, next witness--
Barney fife.
412
00:17:48,635 --> 00:17:49,804
[ all talking ]
413
00:17:49,837 --> 00:17:51,440
Mayor, I'd like to question
414
00:17:51,473 --> 00:17:53,645
This witness first,
If it's all right.
415
00:17:53,678 --> 00:17:56,718
Uh, is that all right with you,
Miss crowley?
416
00:18:01,428 --> 00:18:03,598
Barney...
417
00:18:03,632 --> 00:18:07,373
You're, uh, deputy barney fife,
That right?
418
00:18:07,405 --> 00:18:09,210
That's right.
419
00:18:09,244 --> 00:18:11,681
Would you tell the court
In your own words
420
00:18:11,713 --> 00:18:13,284
What happened yesterday?
421
00:18:13,317 --> 00:18:16,591
Well, you and me and floyd
And opie went fishing.
422
00:18:16,623 --> 00:18:18,995
Did you see a convertible
On the road?
423
00:18:19,027 --> 00:18:20,398
[ clears throat ]
424
00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:21,667
Uh, yeah.
425
00:18:21,701 --> 00:18:24,274
Was the defendant
Driving that convertible?
426
00:18:26,311 --> 00:18:27,580
[ clears throat ]
427
00:18:27,612 --> 00:18:28,582
Yeah.
428
00:18:28,614 --> 00:18:29,950
How fast was it going?
429
00:18:29,983 --> 00:18:31,987
Uh, when it was
Going by us?
430
00:18:32,021 --> 00:18:33,292
That's right.
431
00:18:33,325 --> 00:18:35,996
Well, andy,
You know, uh,
432
00:18:36,028 --> 00:18:38,634
When a car's going by you
And you're standing still,
433
00:18:38,667 --> 00:18:40,772
It's awful hard to tell
How fast it's going.
434
00:18:40,806 --> 00:18:43,345
You know, you and me have
Talked about that a lot.
435
00:18:43,378 --> 00:18:46,418
How fast was the car going
When we overtook it?
436
00:18:46,451 --> 00:18:48,355
Well, andy, by the time
We got to it,
437
00:18:48,388 --> 00:18:49,489
It was stopped.
438
00:18:49,524 --> 00:18:51,493
Barney, how fast
Was the car going
439
00:18:51,528 --> 00:18:53,965
When we was in full pursuit
And you was lookin'
440
00:18:53,997 --> 00:18:56,371
At the speedometer,
Clocking her speed?
441
00:19:01,781 --> 00:19:03,817
[quietly] Andy,
Don't you think
442
00:19:03,852 --> 00:19:06,590
We're making a little bit
Too much out of this?
443
00:19:06,624 --> 00:19:07,826
What was that?
444
00:19:07,860 --> 00:19:09,896
We're making
Too much out of this.
445
00:19:09,930 --> 00:19:12,034
Yes, I think you're making
Too much out of this.
446
00:19:12,067 --> 00:19:13,372
Step down.
447
00:19:13,404 --> 00:19:15,006
Call the next witness.
448
00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:16,743
This 'un I'm sure of.
449
00:19:16,778 --> 00:19:19,884
All right, opie taylor,
Take the stand.
450
00:19:19,917 --> 00:19:22,054
Oh, boy,
There goes opie.
451
00:19:22,087 --> 00:19:23,392
Quiet, quiet.
452
00:19:23,425 --> 00:19:24,659
Hi, son.
453
00:19:24,694 --> 00:19:25,761
Hi.
454
00:19:25,795 --> 00:19:27,633
Where'd you get that?
455
00:19:27,665 --> 00:19:29,637
Miss crowley
Gave it to me.
456
00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:32,443
It's autographed
By the new york yankees.
457
00:19:32,475 --> 00:19:33,477
All of 'em.
458
00:19:33,512 --> 00:19:35,616
She gave it to me
For nothin'!
459
00:19:35,648 --> 00:19:37,420
Ain't she
A nice lady?
460
00:19:43,664 --> 00:19:47,004
Yeah.
461
00:19:47,038 --> 00:19:49,075
I know when I'm licked.
462
00:19:49,107 --> 00:19:50,479
Will, uh...
463
00:19:50,512 --> 00:19:53,885
Will the prisoner
Step forward, please?
464
00:19:53,918 --> 00:19:55,456
[ all talking ]
465
00:19:55,489 --> 00:19:57,158
Quiet. Quiet, folks.
466
00:19:57,190 --> 00:19:59,127
Well, it seems the court
Can't come up with
467
00:19:59,162 --> 00:20:00,899
A witness against you,
Miss crowley,
468
00:20:00,932 --> 00:20:02,402
So therefore
The case is dismissed.
469
00:20:02,402 --> 00:20:03,905
You're free to go.
470
00:20:03,937 --> 00:20:07,178
Oh, thank you so much.
471
00:20:07,211 --> 00:20:09,649
Thank you, all.
472
00:20:09,684 --> 00:20:12,020
Does my hair...
473
00:20:12,053 --> 00:20:13,591
Well...
474
00:20:13,624 --> 00:20:16,095
Fine day's work.
475
00:20:16,128 --> 00:20:17,800
You've outsmarted justice
476
00:20:17,833 --> 00:20:20,506
And you've made a mockery
Of this court.
477
00:20:20,539 --> 00:20:22,909
And you've turned three people
Against me
478
00:20:22,943 --> 00:20:25,816
That I would've sworn
Would never leave my side.
479
00:20:25,848 --> 00:20:28,887
Oh, I can understand
A shiny autographed baseball
480
00:20:28,921 --> 00:20:30,658
Turning a little boy's head,
481
00:20:30,692 --> 00:20:33,264
But I am a little
Disappointed in floyd...
482
00:20:33,296 --> 00:20:35,901
And I'm real disappointed
In my deputy.
483
00:20:35,935 --> 00:20:39,677
He's a law officer
And he ought to know better.
484
00:20:39,709 --> 00:20:41,548
Congratulations, ma'am.
485
00:20:41,581 --> 00:20:43,817
Been quite a day's work.
486
00:20:50,965 --> 00:20:52,735
[ door closes ]
487
00:20:57,680 --> 00:20:59,048
You're all set,
Ma'am.
488
00:20:59,082 --> 00:21:01,119
Oh, thank you, deputy.
Oh, that's all right.
489
00:21:01,152 --> 00:21:06,697
I guess the sheriff
Is pretty angry, isn't he?
490
00:21:06,731 --> 00:21:08,735
Yeah, I'd say he is.
491
00:21:08,767 --> 00:21:10,872
I suppose
You can't blame him.
492
00:21:10,906 --> 00:21:13,110
No, ma'am, you can't.
493
00:21:13,142 --> 00:21:17,819
Look, I'm sorry if I caused
A rift between you two.
494
00:21:17,853 --> 00:21:19,222
I didn't mean...
495
00:21:19,254 --> 00:21:22,193
Ma'am, if you're going,
Would you please just... Go?
496
00:21:49,115 --> 00:21:50,652
[ tires screeching ]
497
00:21:50,686 --> 00:21:52,354
Andy! She's doing it again!
498
00:21:52,389 --> 00:21:54,660
Well, I'm glad
You noticed.
499
00:21:56,831 --> 00:21:59,368
[ siren blaring ]
500
00:22:02,374 --> 00:22:03,977
Young woman --
501
00:22:04,012 --> 00:22:06,249
I know, I was speeding
And I must pay the penalty.
502
00:22:06,282 --> 00:22:08,722
I guess you know when
You're caught dead to rights.
503
00:22:08,754 --> 00:22:10,323
You ain't foolin'
With kids, you know.
504
00:22:10,358 --> 00:22:11,827
Let's run her in,
Andy.
505
00:22:11,860 --> 00:22:14,734
Well, now, that may not
Be necessary, barney.
506
00:22:14,766 --> 00:22:16,301
Andy, don't
You go soft.
507
00:22:16,335 --> 00:22:18,340
Andy: no, I just believe
I know a way
508
00:22:18,373 --> 00:22:21,279
That we can save us some time
All the way around.
509
00:22:21,311 --> 00:22:22,750
See, I happen to know
510
00:22:22,783 --> 00:22:24,953
The justice of the peace
Personally,
511
00:22:24,987 --> 00:22:27,825
And I believe I know the fine
That he'd impose,
512
00:22:27,860 --> 00:22:31,266
And I believe that it would be
The usual fine for speeding,
513
00:22:31,299 --> 00:22:33,403
Ten dollars.
514
00:22:36,108 --> 00:22:38,179
Here you are, sheriff.
515
00:22:38,213 --> 00:22:39,416
Ten dollars.
516
00:22:39,448 --> 00:22:42,187
And 25 more.
517
00:22:42,221 --> 00:22:44,292
25 more?
518
00:22:44,325 --> 00:22:45,829
For the other case.
519
00:22:45,862 --> 00:22:48,199
But the defendant
Won that case.
520
00:22:48,233 --> 00:22:51,339
By highly questionable methods.
521
00:22:51,373 --> 00:22:53,411
Please?
522
00:22:53,444 --> 00:22:56,048
I'd feel a lot better
About myself.
523
00:22:57,985 --> 00:23:00,223
Well, if you'll excuse me
A-sayin' so,
524
00:23:00,257 --> 00:23:02,361
I feel a lot better
About you, too,
525
00:23:02,395 --> 00:23:04,297
And I'd be mighty pleased
If you'd
526
00:23:04,332 --> 00:23:06,403
Come through mayberry
Again sometime.
527
00:23:06,436 --> 00:23:07,973
A little slower, of course.
528
00:23:08,005 --> 00:23:10,376
I'll try to do that.
529
00:23:10,411 --> 00:23:11,980
Real soon.
530
00:23:14,452 --> 00:23:16,990
You know something, deputy?
531
00:23:17,024 --> 00:23:22,267
I still say you bear an amazing
Resemblance to frank sinatra.
532
00:23:30,517 --> 00:23:32,454
You know, andy,
533
00:23:32,489 --> 00:23:35,560
There's one thing you've got to
Say about this case --
534
00:23:35,595 --> 00:23:38,501
It was a gas.
535
00:23:50,323 --> 00:23:51,961
[ laughing ]
536
00:23:51,994 --> 00:23:54,231
What are you
Laughing at?
537
00:23:54,264 --> 00:23:56,002
Oh, something
Miss crowley said.
538
00:23:56,036 --> 00:23:57,038
What?
539
00:23:57,071 --> 00:23:59,107
Oh, nothing.
540
00:23:59,142 --> 00:24:00,276
[ chuckles ]
541
00:24:00,309 --> 00:24:03,951
Well...See if
You can guess.
542
00:24:03,985 --> 00:24:06,689
[ clears throat ]
543
00:24:06,723 --> 00:24:09,061
[ clears throat ]
544
00:24:09,095 --> 00:24:12,067
* quarter to 3:00
545
00:24:12,100 --> 00:24:13,704
* there's no one
In the place *
546
00:24:13,737 --> 00:24:16,108
* except you and me
547
00:24:16,142 --> 00:24:19,984
Oh, oh, yeah,
That's, uh, uh, uh...
548
00:24:20,017 --> 00:24:23,524
Uh, oh, wait a sec,
Oh, uh, yeah, yeah,
549
00:24:23,556 --> 00:24:26,061
Uh, oh, oh, uh,
I don't know the song.
37607
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