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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
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[Kids] Yeah! (giggling)
4
00:00:22,690 --> 00:00:25,359
(band marching)
5
00:00:50,384 --> 00:00:53,654
(sharp dramatic music)
6
00:00:59,026 --> 00:01:02,296
(upbeat drumming music)
7
00:01:03,231 --> 00:01:06,200
(snoring)
8
00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:10,938
("Morning Light"
by Rachel Goodrich)
9
00:01:10,938 --> 00:01:15,476
* I wasn't feeling low,
I wasn't feeling high *
10
00:01:15,476 --> 00:01:20,481
* Baby, kept me up all night,
he kept me up all night *
11
00:01:21,649 --> 00:01:23,451
* And I gotta get going,
I gotta get going *
12
00:01:23,451 --> 00:01:28,456
* I gotta get going
before the morning light *
13
00:01:30,524 --> 00:01:35,229
* I wasn't up for games
of who's wrong or right *
14
00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:40,234
* Baby made me put up a fight,
he kept me up all night *
15
00:01:41,435 --> 00:01:43,204
* And I gotta get going,
I gotta get going *
16
00:01:43,204 --> 00:01:47,408
* I gotta get going
back on to my home *
17
00:01:47,408 --> 00:01:49,243
Oh! (groans)
18
00:01:49,243 --> 00:01:50,077
Oh, damn.
19
00:01:52,846 --> 00:01:53,681
No!
20
00:02:01,589 --> 00:02:04,425
(lightly snoring)
21
00:02:15,169 --> 00:02:16,370
(startling snoring)
22
00:02:16,370 --> 00:02:20,608
("Morning Light"
by Rachel Goodrich)
23
00:02:33,587 --> 00:02:35,122
[Guy] Hey.
24
00:02:35,122 --> 00:02:36,290
[Sarah] Hey.
25
00:02:39,593 --> 00:02:40,594
[Guy] Ouch.
26
00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:41,762
[Sarah] Yeah.
27
00:02:41,762 --> 00:02:42,596
Yeah.
28
00:02:42,596 --> 00:02:43,864
Yeah, I...
29
00:02:43,864 --> 00:02:48,702
Yeah, I left my car at
the bar, so. (laughs)
30
00:02:49,203 --> 00:02:50,238
Wow.
31
00:02:50,238 --> 00:02:51,071
Really?
32
00:02:51,071 --> 00:02:52,373
Yeah.
33
00:02:52,373 --> 00:02:54,275
- Pretty sure I was in
no position to drive.
34
00:02:54,275 --> 00:02:55,509
Yeah.
35
00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:58,246
Well, I'm a little fuzzy
on that part myself.
36
00:02:58,246 --> 00:02:59,847
Yeah.
37
00:02:59,847 --> 00:03:01,148
Okay.
38
00:03:01,148 --> 00:03:03,251
I'll take you back there.
39
00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:07,321
- Or, you know, I could
just call the cab if--
40
00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:09,189
That's okay.
41
00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:11,259
I'll take you back there.
42
00:03:15,729 --> 00:03:17,231
[Sarah] Thanks.
43
00:03:36,116 --> 00:03:36,950
Kelly?
44
00:03:42,490 --> 00:03:43,324
Kimberly?
45
00:03:50,564 --> 00:03:51,699
Ready?
46
00:03:51,699 --> 00:03:52,533
Hon?
47
00:03:55,503 --> 00:03:57,505
Well, this is not ideal.
48
00:04:02,843 --> 00:04:05,513
(horns honking)
49
00:04:12,886 --> 00:04:16,056
(helicopter whirring)
50
00:04:25,165 --> 00:04:26,266
* Oh, yeah
51
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:29,937
(upbeat dance music)
52
00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:32,039
* Don't leave me hanging
53
00:04:32,039 --> 00:04:34,041
* Like you don't care
54
00:04:34,041 --> 00:04:35,576
* Last night was banging
55
00:04:35,576 --> 00:04:38,512
* And now we're going nowhere
56
00:04:38,512 --> 00:04:41,582
(upbeat dance music)
57
00:04:50,558 --> 00:04:54,795
* You think it's easy
to live in my skin *
58
00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:59,800
* You wouldn't tease me if
you knew where I'd been *
59
00:05:03,203 --> 00:05:05,272
What do you think, man?
60
00:05:06,840 --> 00:05:08,241
Fuck.
61
00:05:08,241 --> 00:05:10,511
Cock-sucking
motherfucking bullshit.
62
00:05:10,511 --> 00:05:11,445
Don't be that guy.
63
00:05:11,445 --> 00:05:12,179
No, I'm gonna be that guy.
64
00:05:12,179 --> 00:05:13,013
Aw.
65
00:05:13,013 --> 00:05:16,249
(horn honking)
66
00:05:16,249 --> 00:05:17,551
(baby crying)
67
00:05:17,551 --> 00:05:21,722
* Gonna buy you a diamond ring
68
00:05:21,722 --> 00:05:26,494
* And if that honking
jerk don't stop *
69
00:05:26,494 --> 00:05:29,096
* Mama's gonna pop a
cap in his mother *
70
00:05:29,096 --> 00:05:30,564
You know what, buddy?
71
00:05:30,564 --> 00:05:33,100
I got a poopy diaper
in here and no wipes.
72
00:05:33,100 --> 00:05:34,034
All right.
73
00:05:34,034 --> 00:05:36,269
I think I got it worse off.
74
00:05:38,439 --> 00:05:41,108
(horns honking)
75
00:05:42,209 --> 00:05:45,312
(upbeat dance music)
76
00:05:47,715 --> 00:05:48,549
Move.
77
00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:51,885
- [Caller] Know
I love you honey,
78
00:05:51,885 --> 00:05:54,054
but if you would
sleep home one night
79
00:05:54,054 --> 00:05:56,089
instead of staying at his house,
80
00:05:56,089 --> 00:05:59,493
you would be here
helping me instead of--
81
00:06:04,798 --> 00:06:06,299
I did.
82
00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:07,134
Okay.
83
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:08,502
That sounds good.
84
00:06:08,502 --> 00:06:09,970
Tonight?
85
00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:13,373
(light orchestral music)
86
00:06:17,144 --> 00:06:18,646
* Heads, shoulders,
knees, and toes *
87
00:06:18,646 --> 00:06:20,581
Mom, he's on my side.
88
00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:21,482
She's lying.
89
00:06:21,482 --> 00:06:23,951
I'm not touching.
90
00:06:23,951 --> 00:06:25,085
Stop it.
91
00:06:25,085 --> 00:06:26,286
You guys, cool down, you two.
92
00:06:26,286 --> 00:06:27,220
Cool it.
93
00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:28,155
Do not make me come back there.
94
00:06:28,155 --> 00:06:29,890
I didn't even do anything.
95
00:06:29,890 --> 00:06:31,091
Okay.
96
00:06:31,091 --> 00:06:32,125
Please, honey, stop
with the crying.
97
00:06:32,125 --> 00:06:33,594
Stop picking on me.
98
00:06:33,594 --> 00:06:35,095
- You know what, if you guys
can't sit still for 20 minutes,
99
00:06:35,095 --> 00:06:36,029
I'm turning the car around.
100
00:06:36,029 --> 00:06:37,465
- I'm--
- Honestly.
101
00:06:37,465 --> 00:06:38,432
- That's what we're
doing, I'm turning around,
102
00:06:38,432 --> 00:06:39,366
- we're not going.
- Yeah, right.
103
00:06:39,366 --> 00:06:40,601
You haven't gone anywhere.
104
00:06:40,601 --> 00:06:42,202
There's just millions
of cars in our way.
105
00:06:42,202 --> 00:06:46,540
- You lost that one.
(kid laughing)
106
00:07:07,127 --> 00:07:09,129
(sighs)
107
00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:13,767
- What the?
- I need to--
108
00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:14,602
- Go ahead.
- No.
109
00:07:14,602 --> 00:07:16,136
What were you saying?
110
00:07:16,136 --> 00:07:18,405
- I was just wondering what
the hell was going on here.
111
00:07:18,405 --> 00:07:22,142
Torture (laughs), I think.
112
00:07:27,815 --> 00:07:28,782
What are you doing?
113
00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:29,650
Getting comfortable.
114
00:07:29,650 --> 00:07:30,584
You can't do that.
115
00:07:30,584 --> 00:07:31,519
What if we start to move?
116
00:07:31,519 --> 00:07:32,486
We're not going anywhere.
117
00:07:32,486 --> 00:07:33,320
But what if we start to?
118
00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:34,287
Well, then I'll go.
119
00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:36,657
- I need to--
- It doesn't...
120
00:07:37,858 --> 00:07:39,860
- I just really need to
not be here right now.
121
00:07:39,860 --> 00:07:41,094
Yeah.
122
00:07:41,094 --> 00:07:42,530
Well, if you would
have snuck out like
123
00:07:42,530 --> 00:07:46,667
any decent one-night stand,
we wouldn't be, right?
124
00:07:52,740 --> 00:07:54,407
- I can feel you
staring, you know.
125
00:07:54,407 --> 00:07:55,242
Sorry.
126
00:08:00,981 --> 00:08:02,249
This is ridiculous.
127
00:08:02,249 --> 00:08:04,985
Everyone's turning
off their engines.
128
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:12,425
There better be a
big wreck up there.
129
00:08:13,794 --> 00:08:15,596
What did you just say?
130
00:08:15,596 --> 00:08:16,530
What?
131
00:08:16,530 --> 00:08:17,798
If my time's being wasted,
132
00:08:17,798 --> 00:08:20,634
I'd like it to be
for a good reason.
133
00:08:20,634 --> 00:08:22,803
Wow, you are kinda dark.
134
00:08:24,071 --> 00:08:25,272
What?
135
00:08:25,272 --> 00:08:27,474
A little twisted up
metal never hurt anyone.
136
00:08:27,474 --> 00:08:28,942
No.
137
00:08:28,942 --> 00:08:30,911
I'm actually pretty sure
that that is the exact type
138
00:08:30,911 --> 00:08:33,581
of thing that hurts people.
139
00:08:33,581 --> 00:08:35,015
- It's just that
there's nothing worse
140
00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:37,685
than when traffic
lifts for no reason.
141
00:08:37,685 --> 00:08:38,852
Except for maybe, you know,
142
00:08:38,852 --> 00:08:40,754
wishing somebody getting
in a car accident.
143
00:08:40,754 --> 00:08:41,989
There's that.
144
00:08:41,989 --> 00:08:43,624
- Is it so wrong to
want a little evidence
145
00:08:43,624 --> 00:08:45,192
to justify all this
as opposed to--
146
00:08:45,192 --> 00:08:46,694
Right.
147
00:08:46,694 --> 00:08:47,928
- Oh, you're just freed up and
then you don't even know why
148
00:08:47,928 --> 00:08:49,229
you were stuck in
the first place.
149
00:08:49,229 --> 00:08:50,798
I'm sorry, but a giant fire
150
00:08:50,798 --> 00:08:53,734
would make it at
least worthwhile.
151
00:08:53,734 --> 00:08:54,568
Okay.
152
00:08:57,537 --> 00:09:02,075
There's got to be a science
behind traffic, right?
153
00:09:02,075 --> 00:09:03,711
Don't you think?
154
00:09:03,711 --> 00:09:04,878
No, I don't.
155
00:09:06,647 --> 00:09:07,480
Oh.
156
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:08,548
I do.
157
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,550
A lot actually.
158
00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:12,853
Yeah, it's like none of
that makes sense, you know.
159
00:09:12,853 --> 00:09:14,655
Like it it can't just...
160
00:09:14,655 --> 00:09:15,488
- [Radio Announcer]
Kick off your shoes.
161
00:09:15,488 --> 00:09:16,590
It's gonna be a while.
162
00:09:16,590 --> 00:09:18,091
And talk to your neighbor.
163
00:09:18,091 --> 00:09:20,393
And please keep the road
rage to a minimum, folks.
164
00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:23,130
It's a fucking Sunday, people.
165
00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:24,197
- [Traffic Reporter]
Heading north down
166
00:09:24,197 --> 00:09:26,333
to the southbound 406.
167
00:09:26,333 --> 00:09:28,035
- [Traffic Reporter] Directions
all the way up the highway
168
00:09:28,035 --> 00:09:28,969
and down the interstate.
169
00:09:28,969 --> 00:09:29,903
It turns out--
170
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,371
[Radio Announcer] Sorry.
171
00:09:31,371 --> 00:09:32,806
There is no reason, but as
soon as we hear, you will too.
172
00:09:32,806 --> 00:09:34,307
Somebody.
173
00:09:34,307 --> 00:09:36,877
It can't just be 'cause
of some guy who slams
174
00:09:36,877 --> 00:09:38,812
on his brakes to
stare at some ducks
175
00:09:38,812 --> 00:09:41,448
or 'cause he spilled
a Slurpee on himself.
176
00:09:41,448 --> 00:09:43,817
There's got to be a mathematical
equation to all this.
177
00:09:43,817 --> 00:09:45,285
Right?
178
00:09:45,285 --> 00:09:47,154
I think about guys who
get into the carpool lane
179
00:09:47,154 --> 00:09:48,789
even though that's
going slower than the--
180
00:09:48,789 --> 00:09:49,723
Greatt.
181
00:09:49,723 --> 00:09:51,191
Than the normal traffic.
182
00:09:51,191 --> 00:09:52,726
Makes no sense.
183
00:09:52,726 --> 00:09:54,261
- Oh my God, there better
be a dead body up there
184
00:09:54,261 --> 00:09:56,096
because I just can't
take this anymore.
185
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,130
Now somebody has to die?
186
00:09:57,130 --> 00:09:57,965
Yeah.
187
00:09:57,965 --> 00:09:59,132
They do, thanks to you.
188
00:09:59,132 --> 00:10:00,333
- Why don't we
just go all the way
189
00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:01,869
and just say somebody
loses their head.
190
00:10:01,869 --> 00:10:03,403
That'd be fun.
191
00:10:03,403 --> 00:10:05,806
You put that out in the world
and somebody gets decapitated,
192
00:10:05,806 --> 00:10:08,308
so it will be worth your time.
193
00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:13,446
- There's something
seriously wrong with you.
194
00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:16,016
Well, we have that in common.
195
00:10:16,984 --> 00:10:18,752
It's true.
196
00:10:18,752 --> 00:10:20,087
It's really true.
197
00:10:20,087 --> 00:10:21,955
What's that?
198
00:10:21,955 --> 00:10:25,592
- Oh, you know, it's just easier
to have sex with a stranger
199
00:10:25,592 --> 00:10:27,995
than converse with one.
200
00:10:27,995 --> 00:10:29,062
(Guy mumbling)
201
00:10:29,062 --> 00:10:29,963
What?
202
00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:31,164
Huh?
203
00:10:31,164 --> 00:10:32,099
- [Guy] You want
me deep inside you?
204
00:10:32,099 --> 00:10:34,101
I want you inside me so deep.
205
00:10:34,101 --> 00:10:35,168
[Guy] Yeah.
206
00:10:35,168 --> 00:10:37,470
Oh, give it to me.
207
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:38,972
Well, you give it to me.
208
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:39,807
Wait.
209
00:10:41,041 --> 00:10:42,609
Don't you want me
to give it to you?
210
00:10:42,609 --> 00:10:43,576
Yeah.
211
00:10:43,576 --> 00:10:44,611
Yeah, just put it in already.
212
00:10:44,611 --> 00:10:46,446
- Okay, okay.
- Okay.
213
00:10:46,446 --> 00:10:48,248
You like that?
214
00:10:48,248 --> 00:10:51,084
(groaning)
215
00:10:51,084 --> 00:10:52,753
You're screwing the blanket.
216
00:10:52,753 --> 00:10:53,586
What?
217
00:10:54,521 --> 00:10:55,355
Good try.
218
00:10:55,355 --> 00:10:56,189
Oh my God.
219
00:10:56,189 --> 00:10:57,791
(laughing)
220
00:10:57,791 --> 00:11:01,361
I can't feel anything
with this thing on.
221
00:11:01,361 --> 00:11:03,463
- I told you you
couldn't get it in.
222
00:11:03,463 --> 00:11:05,432
I guess that is what she said.
223
00:11:05,432 --> 00:11:07,600
(laughing)
224
00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:08,601
Come here.
225
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:14,942
(groaning)
226
00:11:22,950 --> 00:11:23,784
Ugh.
227
00:11:28,588 --> 00:11:30,357
- Well, I guess they don't
call it a one-night stand
228
00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:32,760
and the morning
after for a reason.
229
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:33,593
Right?
230
00:11:33,593 --> 00:11:35,295
What are you doing?
231
00:11:35,295 --> 00:11:37,130
(Sarah throwing up)
232
00:11:37,130 --> 00:11:37,965
Fuck.
233
00:11:42,569 --> 00:11:44,371
Do you need any help or?
234
00:11:44,371 --> 00:11:45,205
[Sarah] I'm fine.
235
00:11:45,205 --> 00:11:47,307
(throwing up)
236
00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:48,776
I'm fine.
237
00:11:48,776 --> 00:11:51,278
[Man] Oh, man, that's nasty.
238
00:11:53,914 --> 00:11:54,948
What is she doing?
239
00:11:54,948 --> 00:11:57,450
You let that all out, honey.
240
00:11:59,152 --> 00:12:00,653
[Driver] Fucking bullshit.
241
00:12:00,653 --> 00:12:01,955
I'm disappointed.
242
00:12:01,955 --> 00:12:03,957
You're better than that.
243
00:12:05,292 --> 00:12:07,961
(horns honking)
244
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:23,877
- If it's any consolation, I
have that effect on all women.
245
00:12:23,877 --> 00:12:28,348
- You don't have to try to be
charming or funny right now.
246
00:12:28,348 --> 00:12:29,917
I'm perfectly fine.
247
00:12:42,062 --> 00:12:44,631
(Sarah crying)
248
00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:02,449
- [Guy] Are you sure
I can't do anything?
249
00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:03,383
I'm fine!
250
00:13:18,098 --> 00:13:20,167
Nothing came out by the way.
251
00:13:20,167 --> 00:13:21,001
Just...
252
00:13:25,005 --> 00:13:25,839
("A More Uncertain
Future" by Love Is All)
253
00:13:25,839 --> 00:13:26,940
* Memories away
254
00:13:26,940 --> 00:13:29,776
* I'm starting any day
255
00:13:29,776 --> 00:13:34,247
* At last
256
00:13:34,247 --> 00:13:36,049
* Baby, please come with me
257
00:13:36,049 --> 00:13:38,085
* I've had enough of fantasy
258
00:13:38,085 --> 00:13:40,153
* But maybe if I promise you
259
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:42,089
* A promise is enough for you
260
00:13:42,089 --> 00:13:43,156
* I'll be back
261
00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:44,491
* I won't wait
262
00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:45,959
So.
263
00:13:45,959 --> 00:13:47,460
What's the verdict?
264
00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:51,198
'Cause it looks like we
have quite the hung jury.
265
00:13:51,198 --> 00:13:52,699
You are so sexy.
266
00:13:58,405 --> 00:14:00,073
You've been naughty.
267
00:14:11,284 --> 00:14:12,419
Want some of this?
268
00:14:12,419 --> 00:14:13,653
Oh, yeah.
269
00:14:13,653 --> 00:14:14,687
Come here.
270
00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:16,189
Come and get this.
271
00:14:25,065 --> 00:14:26,566
Come here.
272
00:14:26,566 --> 00:14:27,634
[Guy] Yeah?
273
00:14:37,510 --> 00:14:39,346
Don't leave any marks.
274
00:14:39,346 --> 00:14:40,613
- [Guy] Uh-huh.
275
00:14:41,949 --> 00:14:43,416
I'm serious.
276
00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:45,418
[Guy] Right, all right.
277
00:14:45,418 --> 00:14:50,423
(heavy breathing)
(groaning)
278
00:14:55,929 --> 00:14:57,530
Oh, look what I found.
279
00:14:57,530 --> 00:14:58,365
Ding, ding.
280
00:14:58,365 --> 00:14:59,199
Ow!
281
00:14:59,199 --> 00:15:00,133
[Guy] Sexy time.
282
00:15:00,133 --> 00:15:01,401
Just put it in me.
283
00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:02,469
[Guy] Okay.
284
00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:09,076
You want me to fuck you?
285
00:15:09,076 --> 00:15:13,913
- No, I want you to
do my taxes. (laughs)
286
00:15:17,717 --> 00:15:19,019
(Guy mumbling)
287
00:15:19,019 --> 00:15:20,353
What, huh?
288
00:15:20,353 --> 00:15:21,989
- [Guy] You want
me deep inside you?
289
00:15:21,989 --> 00:15:23,890
I want you inside me so deep.
290
00:15:23,890 --> 00:15:25,125
[Guy] Yeah?
291
00:15:25,125 --> 00:15:26,226
Oh.
292
00:15:26,226 --> 00:15:27,227
Give it to me.
293
00:15:27,227 --> 00:15:28,895
You give it to me.
294
00:15:33,566 --> 00:15:36,069
So, you're a florist, right?
295
00:15:37,004 --> 00:15:38,771
Attorney.
296
00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:40,140
Right.
297
00:15:40,140 --> 00:15:43,143
It's a shame, I
really like flowers.
298
00:15:45,078 --> 00:15:47,780
- To think I could be
sitting in a cab right now.
299
00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:49,249
You're such a nice guy.
300
00:15:49,249 --> 00:15:50,450
Wow.
301
00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:51,918
I'm sorry.
302
00:15:51,918 --> 00:15:55,555
- No, I'm just impressed
that you remembered my name.
303
00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:57,857
You were more sober
than I thought.
304
00:15:57,857 --> 00:15:59,226
Was I?
305
00:15:59,226 --> 00:16:00,860
Yeah, 'cause...
306
00:16:00,860 --> 00:16:04,097
Oh, you just meant,
guy, like I'm a guy.
307
00:16:04,097 --> 00:16:05,032
No, 'cause that's my...
308
00:16:05,032 --> 00:16:06,033
- Right, Guy!
- I'm Guy.
309
00:16:06,033 --> 00:16:06,866
Yeah.
310
00:16:06,866 --> 00:16:07,700
Guy.
311
00:16:07,700 --> 00:16:10,037
See how that worked?
312
00:16:10,037 --> 00:16:11,938
- Well, I guess I just
got lucky with that one.
313
00:16:11,938 --> 00:16:13,040
It happens.
314
00:16:16,176 --> 00:16:18,345
It's a pleasure to meet you.
315
00:16:18,345 --> 00:16:19,179
Oh.
316
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:21,748
Sarah.
317
00:16:21,748 --> 00:16:23,050
Sarah.
318
00:16:23,050 --> 00:16:24,517
Sarah.
319
00:16:24,517 --> 00:16:25,352
Oh.
320
00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:31,491
So, what kind of an
attorney are you, Sarah?
321
00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:34,427
- I do international,
commercial arbitration.
322
00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:35,695
Oh, cool.
323
00:16:35,695 --> 00:16:37,197
What jurisdiction?
324
00:16:38,598 --> 00:16:39,799
You have no idea what I do.
325
00:16:39,799 --> 00:16:40,867
Nope, not in the slightest.
326
00:16:40,867 --> 00:16:41,701
No.
327
00:16:43,136 --> 00:16:44,337
I deal with dispute resolution
328
00:16:44,337 --> 00:16:47,774
over international
sale of goods.
329
00:16:47,774 --> 00:16:49,076
I'm an accountant.
330
00:16:49,076 --> 00:16:50,743
I do people's taxes.
331
00:16:51,711 --> 00:16:53,080
Well, that's easier.
332
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:54,281
Yeah.
333
00:16:54,281 --> 00:16:55,282
To explain.
334
00:16:55,282 --> 00:16:57,784
Sure, I know what you meant.
335
00:17:00,087 --> 00:17:03,123
I think I hired a lawyer for
a traffic ticket one time.
336
00:17:03,123 --> 00:17:04,991
- Oh, yeah, how'd
that work out for ya?
337
00:17:04,991 --> 00:17:07,860
- It was like 140 bucks
for a 10 minute phone call.
338
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:08,828
- Really?
- Yeah.
339
00:17:08,828 --> 00:17:10,330
You got off cheap.
340
00:17:10,330 --> 00:17:12,332
- It was dismissed before
you could even do anything.
341
00:17:12,332 --> 00:17:14,601
I woulda charged you double.
342
00:17:14,601 --> 00:17:15,435
Really?
343
00:17:16,669 --> 00:17:18,138
Just when I was likin' ya.
344
00:17:18,138 --> 00:17:19,839
Tell me you're being sarcastic.
345
00:17:19,839 --> 00:17:21,108
What can I say.
346
00:17:21,108 --> 00:17:23,810
You can take the girl
out of Brooklyn, but.
347
00:17:23,810 --> 00:17:25,478
- Brooklyn, huh?
- Uh-huh.
348
00:17:25,478 --> 00:17:26,813
- I like Brooklyn.
(phone chiming)
349
00:17:26,813 --> 00:17:28,181
I think I have some
family up there.
350
00:17:28,181 --> 00:17:30,117
Yeah, everybody does.
351
00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:36,223
(keys jingling)
352
00:17:36,223 --> 00:17:37,490
[Guy] I can't get it in.
353
00:17:37,490 --> 00:17:38,925
[Sarah] That's what she said.
354
00:17:38,925 --> 00:17:41,060
- [Guy] Oh my God,
really, with that one?
355
00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:41,994
- (doorbell ringing)
- Oops!
356
00:17:41,994 --> 00:17:44,197
You're leanin' on my doorbell.
357
00:17:44,197 --> 00:17:45,031
Wow.
358
00:17:46,133 --> 00:17:47,234
Look at that.
359
00:17:48,201 --> 00:17:49,969
The city is gorgeous!
360
00:17:52,239 --> 00:17:53,173
Oh my gosh.
361
00:17:54,073 --> 00:17:56,809
I love the sound of ambulances.
362
00:17:56,809 --> 00:17:58,245
It's so soothing.
363
00:17:59,479 --> 00:18:01,013
Reminds me of home.
364
00:18:05,017 --> 00:18:06,286
Give me a tour.
365
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:09,689
This is it.
366
00:18:10,990 --> 00:18:11,924
Oh, my God.
367
00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:14,427
Really?
368
00:18:15,562 --> 00:18:18,798
- Well, give it a
whirl before ya judge.
369
00:18:21,968 --> 00:18:23,170
Oh.
370
00:18:23,170 --> 00:18:24,571
- [Guy] That's real
money in there.
371
00:18:24,571 --> 00:18:26,573
Okay, this is awesome.
372
00:18:28,275 --> 00:18:29,442
Ooh, you play?
373
00:18:30,577 --> 00:18:31,511
Oh, yeah.
374
00:18:32,679 --> 00:18:36,015
Oh, oh...
(playing piano)
375
00:18:36,015 --> 00:18:37,617
It's loud.
376
00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:38,618
Oh, sorry.
377
00:18:39,586 --> 00:18:41,388
And the neighbors.
378
00:18:41,388 --> 00:18:42,222
Oh.
379
00:18:43,089 --> 00:18:45,758
(playing piano)
380
00:18:47,527 --> 00:18:49,962
That is some hot ass music.
381
00:18:59,239 --> 00:19:00,440
Look at that.
382
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:03,876
Where was this taken?
383
00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:05,645
That.
384
00:19:06,513 --> 00:19:07,347
That...
385
00:19:10,750 --> 00:19:11,851
I don't know.
386
00:19:13,119 --> 00:19:14,053
You don't know?
387
00:19:14,053 --> 00:19:15,955
I don't know, I have no idea.
388
00:19:15,955 --> 00:19:17,990
But, I prefer it that way,
389
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:22,429
you know, 'cause then it's
mine, wherever I want it to be.
390
00:19:22,429 --> 00:19:25,031
(birds cawing)
391
00:19:28,268 --> 00:19:31,971
- Yeah, but I would still
wanna know, you know?
392
00:19:31,971 --> 00:19:34,241
It's in your home.
393
00:19:34,241 --> 00:19:35,174
Right.
394
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:37,043
Ooh, old school, I love it.
395
00:19:37,043 --> 00:19:38,478
Can I play it low?
396
00:19:38,478 --> 00:19:39,712
Yeah.
397
00:19:39,712 --> 00:19:41,013
But you have to play
it really low, please.
398
00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:41,848
Okay.
399
00:19:56,929 --> 00:19:58,331
(light tropical music)
400
00:19:58,331 --> 00:20:01,100
- Oh, oh, listen
to that crackle.
401
00:20:03,169 --> 00:20:07,507
Oh, you just don't get that
on nineteens, you know?
402
00:20:07,507 --> 00:20:10,810
Well, glad you appreciate it.
403
00:20:10,810 --> 00:20:11,644
Totally.
404
00:20:13,145 --> 00:20:14,381
How can you not, though?
405
00:20:14,381 --> 00:20:16,283
It's just so damn sexy.
406
00:20:24,991 --> 00:20:26,893
Look at this place.
407
00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:30,397
You've done pretty
good for yourself, huh?
408
00:20:32,999 --> 00:20:33,833
Ooh.
409
00:20:35,001 --> 00:20:38,070
This is like the
softest carpet ever!
410
00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:41,107
This is amazing.
411
00:20:41,107 --> 00:20:41,941
Ooh.
412
00:20:44,777 --> 00:20:46,646
Oh, I love this carpet.
413
00:20:46,646 --> 00:20:49,148
I just wanna have sex with it.
414
00:20:50,350 --> 00:20:53,453
- Where'd you say
you were from again?
415
00:20:53,453 --> 00:20:55,522
- Don't you think
that we're way passed
416
00:20:55,522 --> 00:20:59,091
that get to know you
chit chat phase, Greg?
417
00:20:59,959 --> 00:21:00,827
It's Guy.
418
00:21:02,061 --> 00:21:02,895
Still.
419
00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:07,233
- [Guy] You know, we just never
got around to any of that.
420
00:21:07,233 --> 00:21:09,602
- There's just one,
teensy-weensy little thing
421
00:21:09,602 --> 00:21:11,704
you need to know about me.
422
00:21:11,704 --> 00:21:12,872
What's that?
423
00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:17,377
- Are you gonna
take me like this,
424
00:21:17,377 --> 00:21:18,445
or like this?
425
00:21:20,647 --> 00:21:21,481
Oh.
426
00:21:27,487 --> 00:21:30,323
I'm gonna...
427
00:21:30,323 --> 00:21:31,991
Make us some drinks.
428
00:21:34,727 --> 00:21:36,629
Well, that works, too.
429
00:21:36,629 --> 00:21:38,865
[Guy] I think I have vodka,
430
00:21:38,865 --> 00:21:40,867
a little bit of tequila.
431
00:21:42,201 --> 00:21:43,035
So.
432
00:21:44,771 --> 00:21:47,674
How many ladies have you
had out on that balcony?
433
00:21:47,674 --> 00:21:48,508
Hm?
434
00:21:49,476 --> 00:21:51,711
That is none of your business.
435
00:21:51,711 --> 00:21:54,481
(laughs) Zero.
436
00:21:55,382 --> 00:21:56,215
Okay.
437
00:21:58,785 --> 00:22:00,186
We're gonna do vodka.
438
00:22:00,186 --> 00:22:01,554
- [Sarah] Just bring
out the bottle.
439
00:22:01,554 --> 00:22:03,222
I don't need a fancy drink
440
00:22:03,222 --> 00:22:07,226
with a twist in it or
anything like that.
441
00:22:07,226 --> 00:22:10,296
- So, I have cranberry
and cranberry.
442
00:22:12,599 --> 00:22:14,634
- [Sarah] I'm taking
this carpet home with me.
443
00:22:14,634 --> 00:22:15,702
Right, okay.
444
00:22:15,702 --> 00:22:16,703
I will, too.
445
00:22:18,204 --> 00:22:19,706
- [Sarah] You have
really good taste.
446
00:22:19,706 --> 00:22:20,940
It's really neat in here.
447
00:22:20,940 --> 00:22:22,341
Are you sure you're not gay?
448
00:22:22,341 --> 00:22:25,512
- You are makin'
this very hard on me.
449
00:22:32,652 --> 00:22:35,154
(light music)
450
00:22:53,272 --> 00:22:54,507
I just...
451
00:22:54,507 --> 00:22:56,308
- I need to use the...
- Me first.
452
00:22:56,308 --> 00:22:58,811
(light music)
453
00:23:29,576 --> 00:23:32,311
(downcast music)
454
00:23:44,657 --> 00:23:47,594
* Baby, I just
got your message *
455
00:23:47,594 --> 00:23:49,428
* I heard you're
feelin' restless *
456
00:23:49,428 --> 00:23:51,498
* Needing new adventures
457
00:23:51,498 --> 00:23:53,600
* A more uncertain future
458
00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:55,434
* This time count me out
459
00:23:55,434 --> 00:24:00,406
* I'm better off without
your doubts for now *
460
00:24:05,545 --> 00:24:06,646
- Hey.
- Hey.
461
00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:12,451
[Guy] You come here often?
462
00:24:12,451 --> 00:24:17,189
- Well, I guess that
depends on you, doesn't it?
463
00:24:17,189 --> 00:24:19,425
(laughing)
464
00:24:22,094 --> 00:24:26,098
* Somewhere,
something, someone *
465
00:24:28,100 --> 00:24:33,105
So, have you decided how you're
gonna close this deal yet?
466
00:24:33,973 --> 00:24:35,808
Jury's still out on that.
467
00:24:37,076 --> 00:24:39,311
Oh, well, may I approach?
468
00:24:42,448 --> 00:24:44,116
[Guy] You may.
469
00:24:44,116 --> 00:24:44,951
Okay.
470
00:24:46,118 --> 00:24:48,921
- [Guy] What did
you have in mind?
471
00:24:50,757 --> 00:24:51,658
I just, oh.
472
00:24:53,292 --> 00:24:54,493
(zipper unzipping)
473
00:24:54,493 --> 00:24:56,896
You are out of
order, young lady.
474
00:24:58,130 --> 00:24:58,965
Okay.
475
00:25:01,601 --> 00:25:04,537
- [Sarah] Still
deliberating, I see.
476
00:25:04,537 --> 00:25:07,640
- [Guy] Yeah, this
may take awhile.
477
00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:11,544
* Oh, promises are not for you
478
00:25:12,679 --> 00:25:16,583
Work that thing like
it's goin' out of style.
479
00:25:16,583 --> 00:25:19,251
[Sarah] Ugh, not a compliment.
480
00:25:22,221 --> 00:25:26,993
- [Guy] The long-term effect
of texting can not be positive.
481
00:25:26,993 --> 00:25:29,061
[Sarah] What?
482
00:25:29,061 --> 00:25:30,663
[Guy] Nothin'.
483
00:25:30,663 --> 00:25:31,631
Oh, I know, right?
484
00:25:31,631 --> 00:25:33,132
It's so annoying,
485
00:25:33,132 --> 00:25:35,267
people being able to get
in contact with you 24/7.
486
00:25:35,267 --> 00:25:37,970
- Yeah, if I had mine,
we could text each other.
487
00:25:37,970 --> 00:25:38,805
That'd be fun.
488
00:25:38,805 --> 00:25:40,707
Yeah, that must suck.
489
00:25:42,875 --> 00:25:44,410
- Went on a date
once with this girl
490
00:25:44,410 --> 00:25:46,478
that texted the entire time.
491
00:25:46,478 --> 00:25:47,847
It was so annoying.
492
00:25:47,847 --> 00:25:48,848
Ugh, rude.
493
00:25:52,985 --> 00:25:56,222
- Okay, I'm gonna go find
out what the hell's goin' on.
494
00:25:56,222 --> 00:25:58,324
All right, let me know.
495
00:26:10,336 --> 00:26:12,104
* I will not play
by your rules *
496
00:26:12,104 --> 00:26:13,372
* You know, I've
heard them before *
497
00:26:13,372 --> 00:26:14,373
* I'm not a kid,
I'm not a fool, *
498
00:26:14,373 --> 00:26:17,710
* I'm walkin' out that door
499
00:26:17,710 --> 00:26:19,278
* Can you feel it
500
00:26:19,278 --> 00:26:21,748
* Yeah, baby, can you feel
me comin' like a whirlwind *
501
00:26:21,748 --> 00:26:22,915
* Mind and body open
502
00:26:22,915 --> 00:26:24,250
* Gonna jack it up, yo
503
00:26:24,250 --> 00:26:25,084
* Through the top,
504
00:26:25,084 --> 00:26:26,418
* 'Cause I can't stop
505
00:26:26,418 --> 00:26:27,419
* Gonna take you where
you ain't never been *
506
00:26:27,419 --> 00:26:28,988
* Through to sin
507
00:26:28,988 --> 00:26:31,624
* Yeah, baby, can you feel
me comin' like a whirlwind *
508
00:26:31,624 --> 00:26:32,859
* Mind and body open
509
00:26:32,859 --> 00:26:37,096
* Gonna jack it up,
yo, to the top *
510
00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:50,677
So, I got a bit of bad news.
511
00:26:50,677 --> 00:26:54,146
Unfortunately, I didn't see
any sign of a car wreck.
512
00:26:54,146 --> 00:26:56,749
But, that's not to say
that further down the line
513
00:26:56,749 --> 00:26:59,652
there's not like mass
carnage everywhere.
514
00:26:59,652 --> 00:27:01,954
- Oh, well I'll keep
my fingers crossed.
515
00:27:01,954 --> 00:27:04,323
- Oh, I ran into a
couple cops, also stuck,
516
00:27:04,323 --> 00:27:07,159
that politely told me to
stay the hell in my car.
517
00:27:07,159 --> 00:27:08,661
So, status quo then.
518
00:27:08,661 --> 00:27:11,330
(phone chiming)
519
00:27:12,899 --> 00:27:14,233
It appears so.
520
00:27:16,135 --> 00:27:19,305
Another vibrating device that
men have to compete with.
521
00:27:19,305 --> 00:27:20,139
How fun.
522
00:27:22,441 --> 00:27:23,976
Just so you know,
523
00:27:23,976 --> 00:27:25,444
I wrote the letter U
524
00:27:25,444 --> 00:27:28,080
as opposed to the word
y-o-u in a brief recently,
525
00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:30,382
so that would be the
effect of texting.
526
00:27:30,382 --> 00:27:32,351
- Total butchering of
the English language.
527
00:27:32,351 --> 00:27:34,020
- O-M-G!
528
00:27:34,020 --> 00:27:36,188
Thank God for spell check.
529
00:27:37,890 --> 00:27:39,391
You're quick.
530
00:27:39,391 --> 00:27:40,492
When I have to be.
531
00:27:40,492 --> 00:27:41,994
Why, is that surprising?
532
00:27:41,994 --> 00:27:44,630
- Under this circumstance,
yeah, it's not typical.
533
00:27:44,630 --> 00:27:47,133
- What, only stupid
girls are allowed
534
00:27:47,133 --> 00:27:48,935
to go home with
some random dude?
535
00:27:48,935 --> 00:27:51,804
Just me, usually. (laughs)
536
00:27:51,804 --> 00:27:53,005
- I mean--
- I wouldn't judge
537
00:27:53,005 --> 00:27:55,007
a girl's intellect based
on her life choices
538
00:27:55,007 --> 00:27:57,043
while under the
influence of a margarita.
539
00:27:57,043 --> 00:27:58,544
Whose margarita?
540
00:27:59,578 --> 00:28:01,113
Yeah, that was great.
541
00:28:01,113 --> 00:28:02,715
You know what, you
go ahead and judge.
542
00:28:02,715 --> 00:28:04,083
[Guy] All right.
543
00:28:04,083 --> 00:28:05,017
Are you serious?
544
00:28:05,017 --> 00:28:07,386
Texting, this fucking texting!
545
00:28:07,386 --> 00:28:08,888
It's ruining the world.
546
00:28:08,888 --> 00:28:10,656
- Honestly, who the hell
needs to get a hold of you
547
00:28:10,656 --> 00:28:13,225
at eight AM on a Sunday morning?
548
00:28:13,225 --> 00:28:14,060
Nobody.
549
00:28:16,028 --> 00:28:18,364
Somebody, boyfriend maybe?
550
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:22,735
Well, I hope he's
not the jealous type
551
00:28:22,735 --> 00:28:26,505
because I am a
lover, not a fighter.
552
00:28:26,505 --> 00:28:27,774
Yup.
553
00:28:27,774 --> 00:28:29,776
- You know, I'm really
not the type to impede
554
00:28:29,776 --> 00:28:31,477
on somebody else's happiness,
555
00:28:31,477 --> 00:28:34,180
so I think that we
should probably just end this right now.
556
00:28:34,180 --> 00:28:35,447
Oh, well, I understand.
557
00:28:35,447 --> 00:28:38,117
- Well, don't be so
broken up about it.
558
00:28:38,117 --> 00:28:38,951
I'm not.
559
00:28:41,287 --> 00:28:44,090
Well, it makes sense though.
560
00:28:44,090 --> 00:28:45,324
You don't really seem
like the single type,
561
00:28:45,324 --> 00:28:47,059
not sober, anyway.
562
00:28:47,059 --> 00:28:49,328
What single type?
563
00:28:49,328 --> 00:28:51,130
There's a type, you know?
564
00:28:51,130 --> 00:28:54,366
You know, there's a certain
charm, there's a certain spark.
565
00:28:54,366 --> 00:28:55,201
That I'm lacking.
566
00:28:55,201 --> 00:28:56,435
There's a spark.
567
00:28:56,435 --> 00:28:58,470
Constantly looking,
zigzagging around.
568
00:28:58,470 --> 00:29:00,339
Interested in other people.
569
00:29:00,339 --> 00:29:01,908
What, you don't have
any married friends?
570
00:29:01,908 --> 00:29:03,375
All my friends are married!
571
00:29:03,375 --> 00:29:04,476
Oh, okay.
572
00:29:04,476 --> 00:29:05,878
Well, you should ask them.
573
00:29:05,878 --> 00:29:08,080
I mean, that's why I'm
invited to all their parties,
574
00:29:08,080 --> 00:29:09,916
so they can watch all
the flirtiness go down
575
00:29:09,916 --> 00:29:11,317
and not be bored.
576
00:29:12,718 --> 00:29:13,719
That's messed up.
577
00:29:13,719 --> 00:29:14,653
Right?
578
00:29:14,653 --> 00:29:15,855
Think about that the next time
579
00:29:15,855 --> 00:29:19,058
you and your boyfriend
have people over.
580
00:29:22,761 --> 00:29:24,430
So, what's his deal?
581
00:29:26,665 --> 00:29:29,068
Is he a lawyer, too?
582
00:29:29,068 --> 00:29:32,204
- He's 6'3" all muscle,
black belt in TaeKwonDo.
583
00:29:32,204 --> 00:29:33,772
Don't worry, I think that
he finally understands
584
00:29:33,772 --> 00:29:36,375
that we're seeing other people.
585
00:29:39,211 --> 00:29:42,414
My vote is that you
take me home with you.
586
00:29:42,414 --> 00:29:44,083
Oh, is that right?
587
00:29:45,351 --> 00:29:47,686
And do dirty things to me.
588
00:29:52,458 --> 00:29:54,460
Somebody agrees with me.
589
00:29:59,765 --> 00:30:01,600
- Well, that somebody
doesn't always make
590
00:30:01,600 --> 00:30:03,102
the best decisions.
591
00:30:03,102 --> 00:30:05,571
Seems pretty smart to me.
592
00:30:05,571 --> 00:30:06,405
Oh, God.
593
00:30:07,773 --> 00:30:09,375
You are bad.
594
00:30:09,375 --> 00:30:10,309
Really?
595
00:30:10,309 --> 00:30:12,444
Yeah, yeah, you are bad.
596
00:30:13,645 --> 00:30:16,715
I know it when I see
it and you are bad.
597
00:30:17,583 --> 00:30:18,417
Good.
598
00:30:20,319 --> 00:30:24,390
- Oh, you're gonna make
me do things I shouldn't.
599
00:30:25,757 --> 00:30:26,926
And I'll make you do things
600
00:30:26,926 --> 00:30:29,428
that you thought you couldn't.
601
00:30:30,897 --> 00:30:32,798
Wait, you're not
gonna take me home
602
00:30:32,798 --> 00:30:34,533
and chop me into
little pieces, are you,
603
00:30:34,533 --> 00:30:37,203
'cause I'm not really
into that kind of thing?
604
00:30:37,203 --> 00:30:38,037
You're not?
605
00:30:38,037 --> 00:30:39,571
- Mm-mm.
606
00:30:39,571 --> 00:30:41,908
Okay, I think you're sexy.
607
00:30:43,042 --> 00:30:43,943
Relatively.
608
00:30:45,011 --> 00:30:45,844
Oh, wow.
609
00:30:46,745 --> 00:30:49,381
You just got me a little wet.
610
00:30:49,381 --> 00:30:51,183
Oh, my God.
611
00:30:51,183 --> 00:30:52,551
Excuse me, sir?
612
00:30:52,551 --> 00:30:53,385
Sir?
613
00:30:59,091 --> 00:31:01,027
I don't know about this.
614
00:31:05,331 --> 00:31:06,165
Hey?
615
00:31:19,178 --> 00:31:22,014
(phone vibrating)
616
00:31:23,482 --> 00:31:25,651
Your boyfriend's calling.
617
00:31:25,651 --> 00:31:27,186
It's not my boyfriend.
618
00:31:27,186 --> 00:31:28,787
Oh, does he know that?
619
00:31:28,787 --> 00:31:30,156
Oh, my God.
620
00:31:30,156 --> 00:31:31,623
Can you do something
to get us moving?
621
00:31:31,623 --> 00:31:32,558
I mean, really.
622
00:31:32,558 --> 00:31:33,492
And what would you suggest?
623
00:31:33,492 --> 00:31:35,361
I don't know, it's just...
624
00:31:35,361 --> 00:31:37,629
What, is the President
in town or something?
625
00:31:37,629 --> 00:31:39,331
- You know, it may not
be my place to say,
626
00:31:39,331 --> 00:31:42,168
but what's up with this guy
gettin' you all freaked out?
627
00:31:42,168 --> 00:31:44,870
- It's not a guy, it's
my crazy sisters, okay?
628
00:31:44,870 --> 00:31:46,805
We were supposed to meet up
and whenever we have a plan,
629
00:31:46,805 --> 00:31:49,508
my whole world has
to revolve around it.
630
00:31:49,508 --> 00:31:51,310
I just thought we'd
be out of here by now,
631
00:31:51,310 --> 00:31:54,046
so I don't know what to type.
632
00:31:54,046 --> 00:31:56,482
- Why don't you try
typing the truth?
633
00:31:56,482 --> 00:31:58,484
What, "Hey guys, I had sex
634
00:31:58,484 --> 00:32:00,319
"with some random
stranger last night
635
00:32:00,319 --> 00:32:02,654
"and I won't be able to make
our morning brunch after all
636
00:32:02,654 --> 00:32:04,356
"'cause I'll be stuck
in the drive of shame
637
00:32:04,356 --> 00:32:06,525
"and forced to make chit-chat
638
00:32:06,525 --> 00:32:08,460
"for God knows how much longer."
639
00:32:08,460 --> 00:32:09,828
So, is that what you
want me to write?
640
00:32:09,828 --> 00:32:11,730
That sounds about right.
641
00:32:11,730 --> 00:32:12,931
My phone would explode,
642
00:32:12,931 --> 00:32:14,600
we don't have that
kind of relationship.
643
00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:15,534
Really?
644
00:32:15,534 --> 00:32:17,836
I tell my dad everything.
645
00:32:17,836 --> 00:32:19,571
He's gonna get a kick
out of this shit.
646
00:32:19,571 --> 00:32:21,573
- I'm so glad my nightmare
makes for a good story.
647
00:32:21,573 --> 00:32:23,042
- Oh, now, don't
take all the credit.
648
00:32:23,042 --> 00:32:25,177
It's my nightmare, too.
649
00:32:25,177 --> 00:32:28,914
- I'll just tell them
I'm not feeling well.
650
00:32:28,914 --> 00:32:31,750
Oh, my God, I have to
get the hell out of here!
651
00:32:31,750 --> 00:32:33,252
- Wow, you know, I'm
getting a really,
652
00:32:33,252 --> 00:32:37,456
like, over bearing, clingy
vibe from you right now.
653
00:32:37,456 --> 00:32:38,924
You are so not funny.
654
00:32:38,924 --> 00:32:40,426
It's cool.
655
00:32:40,426 --> 00:32:42,028
I've never actually really
had a stalker, this is fun.
656
00:32:42,028 --> 00:32:44,863
- If it wasn't five miles in
heels, I would be walking.
657
00:32:44,863 --> 00:32:47,899
- I'm all for the women
empowerment thing, right,
658
00:32:47,899 --> 00:32:50,069
but don't let the after
sex cuddle chemicals
659
00:32:50,069 --> 00:32:52,104
go to your head.
660
00:32:52,104 --> 00:32:55,474
- You'd have to make me
orgasm to release oxytocin,
661
00:32:55,474 --> 00:32:57,609
so don't worry, you're
in the clear, buddy.
662
00:32:57,609 --> 00:33:00,112
Ouch, wow, you are ruthless.
663
00:33:01,313 --> 00:33:03,282
I bet you're really
good at what you do.
664
00:33:03,282 --> 00:33:05,217
When I have to be.
665
00:33:05,217 --> 00:33:06,818
- Why don't we just
listen to some music, huh?
666
00:33:06,818 --> 00:33:08,087
Great, great.
667
00:33:08,087 --> 00:33:09,988
- [Radio Announcer] To
the 808 show on KSOC--
668
00:33:09,988 --> 00:33:11,257
- Can you just--
669
00:33:11,257 --> 00:33:13,059
- Okay, I'm just,
I'm getting there.
670
00:33:13,059 --> 00:33:16,162
Give me three seconds to
get out of talk radio.
671
00:33:16,162 --> 00:33:17,696
- Well now, it's just
skipping, it's skipping.
672
00:33:17,696 --> 00:33:18,930
- Okay, it's skipping now--
673
00:33:18,930 --> 00:33:20,099
- You have to stop
pressing the button.
674
00:33:20,099 --> 00:33:21,467
It's static, you like that?
675
00:33:21,467 --> 00:33:25,137
You wanna listen to
some static for a while?
676
00:33:27,473 --> 00:33:28,640
- Huh?
- Just change it, okay?
677
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:30,642
- All right, I'll
change it, there we go.
678
00:33:30,642 --> 00:33:32,111
There we go, more talk radio.
679
00:33:32,111 --> 00:33:34,046
- [Sarah] Well, stop
pushing the button.
680
00:33:34,046 --> 00:33:35,514
You passed a good song.
681
00:33:35,514 --> 00:33:38,617
Stop pressing the button
and then it won't stop.
682
00:33:38,617 --> 00:33:41,420
- [Guy] I have stopped
pressing the button.
683
00:33:41,420 --> 00:33:44,656
- [Radio Preacher] And in
the joy of a new beginning.
684
00:33:44,656 --> 00:33:47,259
(upbeat music)
685
00:33:48,427 --> 00:33:49,895
Come on, man.
686
00:33:49,895 --> 00:33:51,397
- [Traffic Reporter] There's
traffic on the highway.
687
00:33:51,397 --> 00:33:53,299
No news on what's causing this
jam, but as soon as we know,
688
00:33:53,299 --> 00:33:55,567
you will, too, so
get comfortable.
689
00:33:55,567 --> 00:33:56,868
- You like that?
- No!
690
00:33:56,868 --> 00:33:59,071
- We'll listen to
this for a while?
691
00:33:59,071 --> 00:34:02,274
Don't, I know how to
use it, this is my car.
692
00:34:02,274 --> 00:34:05,277
I'm trying to get
back to that song.
693
00:34:06,478 --> 00:34:08,547
That concludes our music.
694
00:34:14,820 --> 00:34:19,391
- You know, I just wanted to
cut loose, just one night,
695
00:34:21,460 --> 00:34:24,062
just for once in
my life, you know?
696
00:34:24,062 --> 00:34:27,399
One night with no expectations.
697
00:34:27,399 --> 00:34:28,967
This is what I get.
698
00:34:29,968 --> 00:34:30,802
Sorry.
699
00:34:33,705 --> 00:34:36,308
- Well, at least I know why
I never did this before.
700
00:34:36,308 --> 00:34:39,578
- (chuckles) Uh-huh.
701
00:34:39,578 --> 00:34:40,412
What?
702
00:34:41,280 --> 00:34:42,948
Come on.
703
00:34:42,948 --> 00:34:45,050
Every girl says that.
704
00:34:45,050 --> 00:34:48,420
Oh, I've never done this
before, this so isn't me.
705
00:34:48,420 --> 00:34:51,357
Honestly, that's the
oldest cliche in the book
706
00:34:51,357 --> 00:34:54,760
and, frankly, I expected
more out of you.
707
00:34:55,961 --> 00:34:57,729
- Well, maybe the
really smart girls
708
00:34:57,729 --> 00:34:59,831
that you're used to
taking home say things
709
00:34:59,831 --> 00:35:03,835
just to get a reaction or some
false sense of non-slutiness,
710
00:35:03,835 --> 00:35:06,071
but I say what I mean
and I stick to the facts.
711
00:35:06,071 --> 00:35:07,539
It makes for a cleaner argument.
712
00:35:07,539 --> 00:35:10,075
- Well, first of all, this
is my Honda, not a courtroom,
713
00:35:10,075 --> 00:35:12,578
second, I'm not arguing,
I'm just disagreeing.
714
00:35:12,578 --> 00:35:14,346
You can't disagree with facts,
715
00:35:14,346 --> 00:35:15,947
that's what makes them facts.
716
00:35:15,947 --> 00:35:17,416
Otherwise, they'd be opinions.
717
00:35:17,416 --> 00:35:18,884
No, they're your facts
718
00:35:18,884 --> 00:35:20,419
and since you're saying them,
719
00:35:20,419 --> 00:35:21,987
that makes them your opinion.
720
00:35:21,987 --> 00:35:22,921
That doesn't make sense.
721
00:35:22,921 --> 00:35:24,055
Yeah, it makes total sense.
722
00:35:24,055 --> 00:35:25,056
I'll explain it to you.
723
00:35:25,056 --> 00:35:26,258
Please do.
724
00:35:26,258 --> 00:35:27,459
- Okay, good, since
you're confused?
725
00:35:27,459 --> 00:35:31,029
- I'm not confused, your
logic isn't logical.
726
00:35:31,029 --> 00:35:31,863
Illogical.
727
00:35:31,863 --> 00:35:33,131
Okay, whatever.
728
00:35:33,131 --> 00:35:35,033
- You sure you're
not confused here?
729
00:35:35,033 --> 00:35:37,836
- I am a little bit,
actually, but only because
730
00:35:37,836 --> 00:35:39,371
you're not making any
sense and not because
731
00:35:39,371 --> 00:35:41,640
I can't grasp your
attempt to be esoteric,
732
00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:43,074
but really idiotic point.
733
00:35:43,074 --> 00:35:44,276
- Wow, is that what you
do in the courtroom,
734
00:35:44,276 --> 00:35:46,412
just call the defense names?
735
00:35:46,412 --> 00:35:49,948
- No, I prove your illogic
via an analogy, okay?
736
00:35:49,948 --> 00:35:51,617
But I thought I'd water
it down for the layman.
737
00:35:51,617 --> 00:35:54,253
- Oh, there you go again,
calling the defense names.
738
00:35:54,253 --> 00:35:55,954
- I'm a commercial
arbitrator, okay?
739
00:35:55,954 --> 00:35:58,690
There's no defense because
there's no fucking courtroom.
740
00:35:58,690 --> 00:36:00,659
- I don't think I
appreciate your tone.
741
00:36:00,659 --> 00:36:03,128
Five minutes of silence!
742
00:36:03,128 --> 00:36:07,266
- What, did you just
give me a time out?
743
00:36:07,266 --> 00:36:08,667
- I think that we
should just have
744
00:36:08,667 --> 00:36:12,070
five minutes to just regroup,
for both of us, okay?
745
00:36:12,070 --> 00:36:12,971
No talking.
746
00:36:14,806 --> 00:36:19,811
- Okay, we were sort of in the
middle of that, but whatever.
747
00:36:40,932 --> 00:36:43,435
This is kind of silence.
748
00:36:43,435 --> 00:36:44,270
Sorry.
749
00:36:52,344 --> 00:36:54,813
- [Radio Announcer] Be a
little bit more selective,
750
00:36:54,813 --> 00:36:56,047
then maybe you.
751
00:36:58,684 --> 00:37:00,085
* I'm alone in this world
752
00:37:00,085 --> 00:37:01,853
* My only friend is a BIC
753
00:37:01,853 --> 00:37:04,222
* And opportunity was knocking
at the end of my wrist *
754
00:37:04,222 --> 00:37:05,491
* Defended by my words
755
00:37:05,491 --> 00:37:07,125
* I rock my tongue
on my sleeve *
756
00:37:07,125 --> 00:37:09,127
* But I made some bad choices
757
00:37:09,127 --> 00:37:13,198
- Oh, my god, I gotta
pee, I gotta pee.
758
00:37:13,198 --> 00:37:14,266
I can do it.
759
00:37:14,266 --> 00:37:15,100
Go pee!
760
00:37:23,775 --> 00:37:26,077
(baby crying)
(horn honking)
761
00:37:26,077 --> 00:37:26,978
It's okay.
762
00:37:26,978 --> 00:37:27,813
It's okay.
763
00:37:48,700 --> 00:37:52,771
- I think we should just
agree to disagree, okay?
764
00:37:54,205 --> 00:37:56,542
I hear you and I disagree.
765
00:37:57,809 --> 00:37:59,478
And I agree, okay.
766
00:38:00,679 --> 00:38:04,049
- No, I disagree with
agreeing to disagree.
767
00:38:05,351 --> 00:38:06,785
- You don't wanna
agree to disagree?
768
00:38:06,785 --> 00:38:08,820
No, I disagree with you
769
00:38:08,820 --> 00:38:10,856
and I disagree with
agreeing to disagree
770
00:38:10,856 --> 00:38:13,224
'cause I don't agree.
771
00:38:13,224 --> 00:38:15,861
Disagreeing is not something
that we should agree on.
772
00:38:15,861 --> 00:38:17,863
That just means that we
can't come to an agreement.
773
00:38:17,863 --> 00:38:19,331
Well, I don't agree,
774
00:38:19,331 --> 00:38:21,066
I think that you and I
can come to an agreement,
775
00:38:21,066 --> 00:38:23,101
so I disagree with
agreeing to the idea
776
00:38:23,101 --> 00:38:24,670
that we can't come
to an agreement,
777
00:38:24,670 --> 00:38:26,838
so all around, I disagree.
778
00:38:29,341 --> 00:38:33,178
- Well, you argue almost
as well as you dance.
779
00:38:36,648 --> 00:38:37,549
* Make it
780
00:38:37,549 --> 00:38:38,450
* Taste it
781
00:38:38,450 --> 00:38:39,284
* Touch it
782
00:38:39,284 --> 00:38:40,118
* Groove it
783
00:38:40,118 --> 00:38:40,952
* Move it
784
00:38:40,952 --> 00:38:41,920
* Prove it
785
00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:42,821
* Hit it
786
00:38:42,821 --> 00:38:43,822
* Tap it
787
00:38:43,822 --> 00:38:44,756
* Oh
788
00:38:44,756 --> 00:38:49,361
* Gimme some
789
00:38:49,361 --> 00:38:53,699
* I want it
790
00:38:53,699 --> 00:38:54,900
* Come and get it
791
00:38:54,900 --> 00:38:59,137
* I want it
792
00:38:59,137 --> 00:39:03,174
* Gimme some
793
00:39:03,174 --> 00:39:05,343
* You make me wanna
794
00:39:05,343 --> 00:39:07,278
* Make me wanna rub it good
795
00:39:07,278 --> 00:39:08,880
* I ain't tryin'
to fall in love *
796
00:39:08,880 --> 00:39:11,683
* I just wanna
797
00:39:11,683 --> 00:39:12,518
* I want it
798
00:39:12,518 --> 00:39:13,719
* Come and get it
799
00:39:13,719 --> 00:39:15,854
* I want it
800
00:39:15,854 --> 00:39:17,322
* Come and get it
801
00:39:17,322 --> 00:39:19,758
* Gimme some
802
00:39:25,831 --> 00:39:26,898
So, why me?
803
00:39:27,799 --> 00:39:29,435
Hm?
804
00:39:29,435 --> 00:39:30,669
- I mean, you say
you don't do this,
805
00:39:30,669 --> 00:39:32,671
so why'd you come home with me?
806
00:39:32,671 --> 00:39:34,339
- You Travolta'ed your
way into my pants.
807
00:39:34,339 --> 00:39:36,307
- Oh, come on, I've danced
with a lot of girls.
808
00:39:36,307 --> 00:39:38,209
They don't just drop skirt.
809
00:39:38,209 --> 00:39:41,312
I had to put forth half of
the effort that I usually do.
810
00:39:41,312 --> 00:39:42,147
Usually?
811
00:39:42,147 --> 00:39:43,348
Yeah.
812
00:39:43,348 --> 00:39:44,883
- How many times
constitutes usually?
813
00:39:44,883 --> 00:39:47,486
- It's not like I'm some
player or something,
814
00:39:47,486 --> 00:39:50,922
but I tend to have the
type of relationship
815
00:39:50,922 --> 00:39:53,258
that lasts, like, one night.
816
00:39:55,794 --> 00:39:57,295
Where are you going with this
817
00:39:57,295 --> 00:39:58,897
because it kind of sounds
like you're calling me easy?
818
00:39:58,897 --> 00:39:59,865
No, that's not exactly
819
00:39:59,865 --> 00:40:01,066
- what I'm saying.
- Pretty much.
820
00:40:01,066 --> 00:40:02,734
- Okay, fine, that's
exactly what I'm saying,
821
00:40:02,734 --> 00:40:04,503
but because I don't
think that that's you.
822
00:40:04,503 --> 00:40:07,105
Otherwise, this wouldn't
be so awkward, right?
823
00:40:07,105 --> 00:40:09,007
It would've just been,
like, whatever, no big deal.
824
00:40:09,007 --> 00:40:10,175
You would know.
825
00:40:10,175 --> 00:40:11,577
Yeah, wait, no.
826
00:40:12,544 --> 00:40:14,079
You don't know me.
827
00:40:14,079 --> 00:40:16,582
- No, I don't, but thanks
for reminding me of that.
828
00:40:16,582 --> 00:40:18,884
- Look, usually, I'd have
showered you off by now
829
00:40:18,884 --> 00:40:20,285
and gone about my day.
830
00:40:20,285 --> 00:40:21,520
Ew.
831
00:40:21,520 --> 00:40:23,755
- So, let's consider
this a moment in time
832
00:40:23,755 --> 00:40:25,423
that should've never happened.
833
00:40:25,423 --> 00:40:26,625
- Right?
- Right.
834
00:40:26,625 --> 00:40:28,159
- Whether it's the
president's motorcade
835
00:40:28,159 --> 00:40:30,095
or some, like,
fiery car accident
836
00:40:30,095 --> 00:40:32,163
where people are getting
decapitated all over.
837
00:40:32,163 --> 00:40:33,632
- That was you, okay?
- Okay.
838
00:40:33,632 --> 00:40:37,536
But the point is we shouldn't
probably be here right now
839
00:40:37,536 --> 00:40:39,871
and because we'll most
likely go our separate ways
840
00:40:39,871 --> 00:40:41,306
and never see each other again,
841
00:40:41,306 --> 00:40:45,076
I say we take full advantage
of this opportunity.
842
00:40:45,076 --> 00:40:46,845
Take advantage?
843
00:40:46,845 --> 00:40:48,814
Are you being creepy right
now, don't be creepy.
844
00:40:48,814 --> 00:40:50,916
- No, I'm not, I'm saying
that there's no reason
845
00:40:50,916 --> 00:40:53,418
not to be dead honest
with each other
846
00:40:53,418 --> 00:40:56,454
and the only girls that I
know that go to bars alone
847
00:40:56,454 --> 00:41:00,091
are, frankly,
alcoholics or cougars.
848
00:41:00,091 --> 00:41:01,727
Wow, you keep good company.
849
00:41:01,727 --> 00:41:03,662
- Which is why it
doesn't add up.
850
00:41:03,662 --> 00:41:06,297
So, either you're lying
and you do like me
851
00:41:06,297 --> 00:41:08,600
and care about what I think.
852
00:41:10,769 --> 00:41:12,037
Or?
853
00:41:12,037 --> 00:41:15,674
- Or I was in the wrong
place at the wrong time.
854
00:41:17,108 --> 00:41:19,110
- Don't you mean the right
place at the right time?
855
00:41:19,110 --> 00:41:20,979
No, not with someone who says
856
00:41:20,979 --> 00:41:22,447
they don't do this, Sarah.
857
00:41:22,447 --> 00:41:24,716
That's what doesn't add up.
858
00:41:27,786 --> 00:41:28,620
What?
859
00:41:29,821 --> 00:41:30,922
It's Holly.
860
00:41:31,890 --> 00:41:33,124
What's Holly?
861
00:41:36,227 --> 00:41:39,164
- My name, if
we're being honest.
862
00:41:39,164 --> 00:41:41,667
If we're not, then it's Sarah.
863
00:41:44,736 --> 00:41:45,571
Wow.
864
00:41:48,173 --> 00:41:51,342
What about Kim, you
sure it's not Kim?
865
00:41:52,578 --> 00:41:56,414
- That'd be pretty funny
after all this, but no.
866
00:41:56,414 --> 00:41:57,683
That's so unnecessary,
867
00:41:57,683 --> 00:41:59,818
like I'm gonna stalk
you or something.
868
00:41:59,818 --> 00:42:02,688
- No, I just thought
it would be...
869
00:42:02,688 --> 00:42:05,356
I thought it'd be easier to
be someone else, you know?
870
00:42:05,356 --> 00:42:06,758
For you, maybe.
871
00:42:06,758 --> 00:42:07,993
Yeah, for me.
872
00:42:15,200 --> 00:42:18,203
- Well, I'm still
Guy if it matters.
873
00:42:20,405 --> 00:42:21,807
I know you are.
874
00:42:23,742 --> 00:42:25,677
Dead honest, right?
875
00:42:25,677 --> 00:42:26,912
Sure.
876
00:42:26,912 --> 00:42:30,616
- Okay, why did you come
back in this morning?
877
00:42:32,083 --> 00:42:36,354
What, so you wouldn't make
me feel like I was cheap?
878
00:42:36,354 --> 00:42:38,289
I left my cell phone.
879
00:42:41,793 --> 00:42:44,429
Well, now I feel cheap.
880
00:42:44,429 --> 00:42:47,498
(upbeat dance music)
881
00:43:02,648 --> 00:43:04,816
- That, my friend,
is a purple nurple.
882
00:43:04,816 --> 00:43:06,251
Yeah.
883
00:43:06,251 --> 00:43:07,753
- That'll get you through
any old kind of day.
884
00:43:07,753 --> 00:43:09,420
Oh, that is awful.
885
00:43:11,289 --> 00:43:13,424
Put hair on your chest there?
886
00:43:13,424 --> 00:43:14,660
- Hey!
- I'm just saying!
887
00:43:14,660 --> 00:43:17,228
- Don't look at
my purple nurples.
888
00:43:19,230 --> 00:43:20,531
That's horrible.
889
00:43:20,531 --> 00:43:22,600
- You're real funny with
the compliments there.
890
00:43:22,600 --> 00:43:23,735
I'm sorry.
891
00:43:23,735 --> 00:43:26,337
I guess I'll take it as such.
892
00:43:27,538 --> 00:43:29,775
- What can I say,
I'm a cheap date.
893
00:43:29,775 --> 00:43:31,609
[Bartender] Incoming!
894
00:43:31,609 --> 00:43:33,278
- Whoo!
- Coming at ya.
895
00:43:33,278 --> 00:43:34,680
Oh, what, wait.
896
00:43:35,847 --> 00:43:38,884
- Good job, you can
keep 'em cominin'.
897
00:43:38,884 --> 00:43:41,219
Keep 'em cominin', what's up?
898
00:43:41,219 --> 00:43:43,254
I thought you said one more?
899
00:43:43,254 --> 00:43:44,690
Of each.
900
00:43:44,690 --> 00:43:47,025
Come on, 'bama slamma.
901
00:43:47,025 --> 00:43:48,393
- Bama slamma?
- Ready?
902
00:43:48,393 --> 00:43:49,327
How do you spell that?
903
00:43:49,327 --> 00:43:52,097
Is that all one word there?
904
00:43:52,097 --> 00:43:53,398
- You're asking
too many questions
905
00:43:53,398 --> 00:43:55,266
and need to be drinking again.
906
00:43:55,266 --> 00:43:57,168
Four, three, two, one.
907
00:43:57,168 --> 00:43:59,004
Why can't you be ugly?
908
00:44:03,775 --> 00:44:04,776
That one's worse.
909
00:44:04,776 --> 00:44:07,746
These steadily get worse.
910
00:44:07,746 --> 00:44:10,816
- Come on. tough guy, it's
time to spin a lady proper.
911
00:44:10,816 --> 00:44:11,983
Oh, God.
912
00:44:11,983 --> 00:44:13,919
Okay, hold on, hold on, hold on,
913
00:44:13,919 --> 00:44:15,453
hold your thought, all right?
914
00:44:15,453 --> 00:44:17,122
Just hold the phone here.
915
00:44:17,122 --> 00:44:18,623
What?
916
00:44:18,623 --> 00:44:22,293
- I really appreciate what
you're doing, all right?
917
00:44:23,729 --> 00:44:27,165
And I thank you,
but I think that...
918
00:44:27,165 --> 00:44:28,934
I think we're even.
919
00:44:28,934 --> 00:44:29,768
Steven?
920
00:44:30,635 --> 00:44:31,469
No, Guy.
921
00:44:32,437 --> 00:44:33,772
Oh.
922
00:44:33,772 --> 00:44:35,306
Wow, yeah.
923
00:44:35,306 --> 00:44:39,044
See what you did, you went
and got a man drunk here.
924
00:44:39,044 --> 00:44:41,412
- Come on, I promise I won't
laugh at your dance moves,
925
00:44:41,412 --> 00:44:43,782
even if they're terrible.
926
00:44:43,782 --> 00:44:48,386
- Maybe I should sit back
down here or something?
927
00:44:48,386 --> 00:44:49,821
Come on.
928
00:44:49,821 --> 00:44:50,922
Okay, okay.
929
00:44:51,790 --> 00:44:54,359
No, I'm afraid I can't,
930
00:44:54,359 --> 00:44:57,695
but you are beautiful,
all three of you.
931
00:44:59,264 --> 00:45:02,167
- Make sure you don't
regret this in the morning.
932
00:45:02,167 --> 00:45:05,837
- That is what I'm
in the mood for.
933
00:45:05,837 --> 00:45:08,840
Okay, don't make
me eat the peanuts.
934
00:45:14,045 --> 00:45:17,148
It's a pleasure to
meet you, not Kim.
935
00:45:18,449 --> 00:45:20,185
And you not Steven.
936
00:45:21,352 --> 00:45:22,187
Toodle-oo.
937
00:45:37,168 --> 00:45:38,937
You made the right decision.
938
00:45:38,937 --> 00:45:40,906
It was the right choice.
939
00:45:40,906 --> 00:45:42,908
I couldn't help but overhear.
940
00:45:42,908 --> 00:45:45,777
You sort of dropped the
ball on that one, buddy.
941
00:45:45,777 --> 00:45:47,412
Well, maybe you be a
little more comfortable
942
00:45:47,412 --> 00:45:50,849
at that joint around the corner?
943
00:45:50,849 --> 00:45:51,817
No, I'm good.
944
00:45:51,817 --> 00:45:54,019
I'll just take another drink.
945
00:45:54,019 --> 00:45:57,622
- All right, well, I'm
just trying to help.
946
00:46:02,828 --> 00:46:05,897
- Wait, what joint
around the corner?
947
00:46:07,232 --> 00:46:10,969
- Oh, you know, it's a
boys bar for the boys.
948
00:46:12,470 --> 00:46:13,805
You don't say.
949
00:46:19,510 --> 00:46:22,413
(fast dance music)
950
00:46:27,018 --> 00:46:31,689
* I want it
951
00:46:31,689 --> 00:46:36,627
* Gimme some
952
00:46:36,627 --> 00:46:38,329
* You make me wanna
953
00:46:38,329 --> 00:46:40,731
* Make me wanna
954
00:46:40,731 --> 00:46:42,333
* I ain't tryin'
to fall in love *
955
00:46:42,333 --> 00:46:45,103
* I just wanna
956
00:46:45,103 --> 00:46:45,937
* I want it
957
00:46:45,937 --> 00:46:50,942
* Come get it
958
00:46:55,914 --> 00:46:59,250
* Baby, come and get it
959
00:47:13,865 --> 00:47:14,699
* Taste it
960
00:47:14,699 --> 00:47:15,600
* Touch it
961
00:47:15,600 --> 00:47:16,534
* Prove it
962
00:47:16,534 --> 00:47:17,435
* Move it
963
00:47:17,435 --> 00:47:18,403
* Groove it
964
00:47:18,403 --> 00:47:19,337
* Hit it
965
00:47:19,337 --> 00:47:21,406
* Tap it
966
00:47:24,042 --> 00:47:28,446
I should've gone in for the
kiss right then and there.
967
00:47:28,446 --> 00:47:30,581
- These kind of things
can't be rushed.
968
00:47:30,581 --> 00:47:32,550
Don't be so hard on yourself.
969
00:47:32,550 --> 00:47:33,784
Yeah, I just...
970
00:47:33,784 --> 00:47:35,620
I want it to mean
something, you know?
971
00:47:35,620 --> 00:47:37,288
I mean, I didn't care if
I was the last to kiss
972
00:47:37,288 --> 00:47:38,723
out of all my friends,
973
00:47:38,723 --> 00:47:41,927
but it had to be Eliza Bross,
974
00:47:41,927 --> 00:47:45,563
'cause I was in love
with Eliza Bross.
975
00:47:45,563 --> 00:47:46,797
How old were you?
976
00:47:46,797 --> 00:47:48,299
Sixth grade.
977
00:47:48,299 --> 00:47:50,635
- Sixth grade, you weren't
afraid of catching cooties,
978
00:47:50,635 --> 00:47:52,570
'cause I had that, you
don't want that stuff?
979
00:47:52,570 --> 00:47:55,106
Wait, cooties are curable?
980
00:47:55,106 --> 00:47:56,341
No.
981
00:47:56,341 --> 00:47:57,275
- No, you're just
stuck with them?
982
00:47:57,275 --> 00:47:59,710
Yeah, they're just there.
983
00:47:59,710 --> 00:48:00,711
Well, good to know.
984
00:48:00,711 --> 00:48:01,947
When I was in third grade,
985
00:48:01,947 --> 00:48:05,150
I rode my Schwinn like
15 blocks to her house,
986
00:48:05,150 --> 00:48:06,717
rang the doorbell, she answered,
987
00:48:06,717 --> 00:48:08,153
but I asked to
speak to her father.
988
00:48:08,153 --> 00:48:10,388
Said, "Sir, may I have
permission to take Eliza
989
00:48:10,388 --> 00:48:11,957
"to the sixth grade dance."
990
00:48:11,957 --> 00:48:12,991
In third grade?
991
00:48:12,991 --> 00:48:14,459
Yeah, man.
992
00:48:14,459 --> 00:48:18,596
I wanted to lock that down,
didn't want to take any chances.
993
00:48:18,596 --> 00:48:21,332
- I gave Craig
Grayson my red crown
994
00:48:21,332 --> 00:48:23,935
as a token of my
love in kindergarten.
995
00:48:23,935 --> 00:48:26,404
Well, that is pretty adorable.
996
00:48:26,404 --> 00:48:30,008
- He ate it, he just
chewed it right up.
997
00:48:30,008 --> 00:48:31,576
Guys can be such jerks,
998
00:48:31,576 --> 00:48:34,012
never ends the way you think.
999
00:48:35,313 --> 00:48:38,016
My first kiss was Jodie Fladal
1000
00:48:38,016 --> 00:48:39,617
in the back of the library.
1001
00:48:39,617 --> 00:48:42,587
It didn't mean anything,
it was just a kiss.
1002
00:48:42,587 --> 00:48:44,422
Life is cruel.
1003
00:48:44,422 --> 00:48:47,092
Seventh grade, there was
a spin the bottle party
1004
00:48:47,092 --> 00:48:48,526
and I was praying
the whole night
1005
00:48:48,526 --> 00:48:50,295
that it would land on Craig,
1006
00:48:50,295 --> 00:48:52,630
but every time that stupid
two liter went around,
1007
00:48:52,630 --> 00:48:54,432
it was Arie Kowalski,
1008
00:48:54,432 --> 00:48:55,400
Arie Kowalski,
1009
00:48:55,400 --> 00:48:57,302
Arie Kowalski again!
1010
00:48:57,302 --> 00:48:58,836
Seriously, it was
like that thing
1011
00:48:58,836 --> 00:49:00,071
was magnetized or something,
1012
00:49:00,071 --> 00:49:02,640
we must've kissed
11 times that night.
1013
00:49:02,640 --> 00:49:03,474
What?
1014
00:49:03,474 --> 00:49:04,675
Yeah.
1015
00:49:04,675 --> 00:49:05,943
- You never got around
to kissing Craig?
1016
00:49:05,943 --> 00:49:07,445
Well, by that point,
1017
00:49:07,445 --> 00:49:11,349
me and Arie were pretty much
boyfriend and girlfriend, so.
1018
00:49:11,349 --> 00:49:12,183
So.
1019
00:49:13,951 --> 00:49:15,286
- I don't know, I guess
I'm just not the type
1020
00:49:15,286 --> 00:49:17,288
to go around kissing whomever.
1021
00:49:17,288 --> 00:49:18,456
No, clearly.
1022
00:49:19,590 --> 00:49:21,159
- Hey, me and Arie
dated actually
1023
00:49:21,159 --> 00:49:23,228
until, like, the 10th grade, so.
1024
00:49:23,228 --> 00:49:26,131
- Wow, by then
Eliza was a lesbian.
1025
00:49:27,165 --> 00:49:28,633
What about sixth grade dance?
1026
00:49:28,633 --> 00:49:29,834
Oh, we went.
1027
00:49:29,834 --> 00:49:32,470
No kiss, how could she resist?
1028
00:49:32,470 --> 00:49:35,006
- Well, I didn't really
possess those skills back then,
1029
00:49:35,006 --> 00:49:37,075
but that didn't stop my
sister from draggin' me
1030
00:49:37,075 --> 00:49:39,177
to dance class two times a week.
1031
00:49:39,177 --> 00:49:41,112
There was no boys in the class,
1032
00:49:41,112 --> 00:49:42,080
so she used to dress me up
1033
00:49:42,080 --> 00:49:44,282
in this, like, rhinestone outfit
1034
00:49:44,282 --> 00:49:47,818
and made me practice with
all her friends after school.
1035
00:49:47,818 --> 00:49:50,755
Eventually, I picked up a couple
dance moves along the way.
1036
00:49:50,755 --> 00:49:52,523
- Well, you see, I grew
up with five siblings,
1037
00:49:52,523 --> 00:49:54,525
so I learned to dance waiting
in line for the bathroom.
1038
00:49:54,525 --> 00:49:56,527
- I noticed the pee-pee shuffle.
1039
00:49:56,527 --> 00:49:58,229
Yeah, how'd that go again?
1040
00:49:58,229 --> 00:49:59,264
Kind of like this, right?
1041
00:49:59,264 --> 00:50:01,532
There it is, in the hips.
1042
00:50:03,734 --> 00:50:05,936
Yeah, and what
about your sister?
1043
00:50:05,936 --> 00:50:06,871
Is she still dressing you up
1044
00:50:06,871 --> 00:50:08,273
in all that glitter and?
1045
00:50:08,273 --> 00:50:11,176
- No, fortunately,
she got married
1046
00:50:11,176 --> 00:50:13,078
and opened up a baby factory.
1047
00:50:13,078 --> 00:50:15,713
- Ugh, tell me
about it, mine, too.
1048
00:50:15,713 --> 00:50:19,517
I'm just gonna have a
boy first, just one,
1049
00:50:19,517 --> 00:50:20,951
and then three
years later, a girl,
1050
00:50:20,951 --> 00:50:22,120
and then I'm closing up shop.
1051
00:50:22,120 --> 00:50:23,454
- Yeah, just shutting
that shit down?
1052
00:50:23,454 --> 00:50:25,856
Just sealing it up forever.
1053
00:50:28,426 --> 00:50:32,530
* Where I am going
1054
00:50:32,530 --> 00:50:37,535
* 'Cause I do things
that I have lost my way *
1055
00:50:39,904 --> 00:50:42,507
Not many bars around here, huh?
1056
00:50:44,309 --> 00:50:46,277
- What's wrong with
the one you're in?
1057
00:50:46,277 --> 00:50:48,346
I meant your phone reception.
1058
00:50:48,346 --> 00:50:49,647
Oh.
1059
00:50:49,647 --> 00:50:50,948
Yeah.
1060
00:50:50,948 --> 00:50:53,618
- I have full bars if
you want to call her.
1061
00:50:53,618 --> 00:50:55,553
No, thanks, I'm good.
1062
00:51:03,194 --> 00:51:04,462
Need a drink?
1063
00:51:05,596 --> 00:51:08,032
- You know what, I'm
actually gonna take off.
1064
00:51:08,032 --> 00:51:09,700
Come on, just one.
1065
00:51:10,735 --> 00:51:11,736
Just one, huh?
1066
00:51:11,736 --> 00:51:13,438
Yeah, just one.
1067
00:51:13,438 --> 00:51:15,640
- Thank you, but I'm
not accepting charity
1068
00:51:15,640 --> 00:51:17,808
from pretty ladies anymore.
1069
00:51:17,808 --> 00:51:20,645
- Oh, that's a strange
rule for a guy.
1070
00:51:20,645 --> 00:51:22,447
Strange rule for anyone, really.
1071
00:51:22,447 --> 00:51:24,215
You're a strange guy, huh.
1072
00:51:24,215 --> 00:51:26,617
- Okay, kick a man
when he's down.
1073
00:51:26,617 --> 00:51:29,019
- Aw, now I gotta
buy you a drink.
1074
00:51:29,019 --> 00:51:30,455
Unless you wanna
keep up the illusion
1075
00:51:30,455 --> 00:51:32,257
that you're just
sitting here alone.
1076
00:51:32,257 --> 00:51:35,160
I mean, she might still show.
1077
00:51:35,160 --> 00:51:38,763
- Wow, do they teach you
this secret mind game
1078
00:51:38,763 --> 00:51:40,698
in some sort of school?
1079
00:51:40,698 --> 00:51:43,168
It's pretty much innate.
1080
00:51:43,168 --> 00:51:44,869
Let me ask you something.
1081
00:51:44,869 --> 00:51:46,003
Why?
1082
00:51:46,003 --> 00:51:47,872
Why do girls do it?
1083
00:51:47,872 --> 00:51:50,375
Why give a guy your phone number
1084
00:51:50,375 --> 00:51:51,842
if you're not interested?
1085
00:51:51,842 --> 00:51:54,945
Why text him witty banter
throughout the day?
1086
00:51:54,945 --> 00:51:59,350
And why set up a date if you
don't intend on keeping it?
1087
00:51:59,350 --> 00:52:01,719
He'll have what I'm having.
1088
00:52:03,854 --> 00:52:05,823
Yeah, I do get the phone
number thing though.
1089
00:52:05,823 --> 00:52:06,757
Do you?
1090
00:52:06,757 --> 00:52:07,992
[Holly] Yeah, of course.
1091
00:52:07,992 --> 00:52:09,860
Because we put all
this effort into it
1092
00:52:09,860 --> 00:52:11,296
and we get our hopes up
1093
00:52:11,296 --> 00:52:13,364
and then we wait the
three days before calling,
1094
00:52:13,364 --> 00:52:16,133
but then we call and it
goes straight to voice mail.
1095
00:52:16,133 --> 00:52:18,703
Ah, it crushes our hearts.
1096
00:52:18,703 --> 00:52:21,372
(phone ringing)
1097
00:52:22,907 --> 00:52:24,409
Right on cue.
1098
00:52:24,409 --> 00:52:27,178
- Oh, no, it's not what
you think, trust me.
1099
00:52:27,178 --> 00:52:28,713
You sure?
1100
00:52:28,713 --> 00:52:33,083
- It's just easier sometimes
with caller ID to just not.
1101
00:52:33,083 --> 00:52:35,353
- Why not just give him a
fake phone number then, huh?
1102
00:52:35,353 --> 00:52:37,121
That way he calls,
he doesn't get you,
1103
00:52:37,121 --> 00:52:39,524
end of social transaction.
1104
00:52:39,524 --> 00:52:41,426
- But what if he calls
right in front of you
1105
00:52:41,426 --> 00:52:42,860
and then you're busted?
1106
00:52:42,860 --> 00:52:44,061
So awkward.
1107
00:52:44,061 --> 00:52:45,663
- God forbid that the
guy you don't like
1108
00:52:45,663 --> 00:52:46,831
and don't wanna
spend any time with
1109
00:52:46,831 --> 00:52:48,032
knows you don't like him
1110
00:52:48,032 --> 00:52:49,867
and don't wanna spend
any time with him.
1111
00:52:49,867 --> 00:52:51,669
- Okay, but what
would you prefer,
1112
00:52:51,669 --> 00:52:53,838
that she says she
has a boyfriend?
1113
00:52:53,838 --> 00:52:58,843
- I don't know, how 'bout that
you're just not feelin' it?
1114
00:52:59,744 --> 00:53:01,479
I'm just not feelin' it.
1115
00:53:01,479 --> 00:53:03,648
You see, there you go?
1116
00:53:03,648 --> 00:53:07,017
And then I get up and walk
away and that's the end.
1117
00:53:07,017 --> 00:53:09,387
- I don't like that,
where's the fun in that?
1118
00:53:09,387 --> 00:53:10,921
No, no, no, see,
1119
00:53:10,921 --> 00:53:13,924
none of this is fun on the
guy's side, it's all work.
1120
00:53:13,924 --> 00:53:18,696
The fun comes, for lack of
a better term, when we do.
1121
00:53:18,696 --> 00:53:20,498
What a douche.
1122
00:53:20,498 --> 00:53:21,332
Exactly.
1123
00:53:24,402 --> 00:53:26,103
- You're just enjoying
this whole thing.
1124
00:53:26,103 --> 00:53:27,204
No.
1125
00:53:27,204 --> 00:53:28,038
Yeah.
1126
00:53:28,038 --> 00:53:28,873
Okay, maybe a little.
1127
00:53:28,873 --> 00:53:30,408
Yeah, a little bit.
1128
00:53:30,408 --> 00:53:32,910
- But it's a laughing with,
enjoying with kind of thing.
1129
00:53:32,910 --> 00:53:35,280
- Oh, good, good, that
gives me confidence.
1130
00:53:35,280 --> 00:53:36,947
Yeah.
1131
00:53:36,947 --> 00:53:39,083
- What the hell is
this, it's yellow?
1132
00:53:39,083 --> 00:53:42,287
- This is on behalf
of my entire gender,
1133
00:53:42,287 --> 00:53:45,155
since you were stood
up, an apology.
1134
00:53:45,155 --> 00:53:48,326
- Okay, in that case,
keep 'em comin'.
1135
00:53:52,630 --> 00:53:57,468
- Oh, no, not if you plan on
kissing me, deathly allergic.
1136
00:54:01,972 --> 00:54:02,807
All right.
1137
00:54:09,414 --> 00:54:10,615
What is that?
1138
00:54:10,615 --> 00:54:11,982
- It's a protein
bar, we'll split it.
1139
00:54:11,982 --> 00:54:13,851
Is that peanut butter?
1140
00:54:13,851 --> 00:54:16,587
What, oh shit, I forgot.
1141
00:54:16,587 --> 00:54:18,456
- Unless you want me to
go into anaphylactic shock
1142
00:54:18,456 --> 00:54:19,924
with no chance of
getting me to a hospital,
1143
00:54:19,924 --> 00:54:21,392
kindly put it away.
1144
00:54:21,392 --> 00:54:22,860
All right, okay.
1145
00:54:22,860 --> 00:54:23,694
Over there, please.
1146
00:54:23,694 --> 00:54:24,529
Okay.
1147
00:54:27,264 --> 00:54:30,267
- FYI, girls like
a guy who listens.
1148
00:54:31,402 --> 00:54:33,037
To everything?
1149
00:54:33,037 --> 00:54:35,005
Deathly allergic.
1150
00:54:35,005 --> 00:54:36,040
I wasn't kidding.
1151
00:54:36,040 --> 00:54:37,942
All right, I'm sorry.
1152
00:54:39,076 --> 00:54:41,612
I had a buddy who was
allergic to latex.
1153
00:54:41,612 --> 00:54:43,280
Yeah, right.
1154
00:54:43,280 --> 00:54:44,849
He is, what?
1155
00:54:44,849 --> 00:54:46,551
- If condoms were
made of bubblegum,
1156
00:54:46,551 --> 00:54:49,153
then all guys would be
allergic to Bubbalicious.
1157
00:54:49,153 --> 00:54:50,655
Okay, fair enough.
1158
00:54:50,655 --> 00:54:53,123
But I am actually allergic
to shellfish though.
1159
00:54:53,123 --> 00:54:53,958
[Holly] Me, too.
1160
00:54:53,958 --> 00:54:54,892
Oh, see?
1161
00:54:54,892 --> 00:54:56,160
We have another thing in common.
1162
00:54:56,160 --> 00:54:58,095
- Along with coconuts,
cashews, Brazil nuts,
1163
00:54:58,095 --> 00:54:59,564
chocolates, and bee stings.
1164
00:54:59,564 --> 00:55:01,165
Okay, not so much.
1165
00:55:02,600 --> 00:55:03,868
Does your throat close up?
1166
00:55:03,868 --> 00:55:06,337
Do you get those
hives everywhere?
1167
00:55:06,337 --> 00:55:08,573
No, no, I just get drunk.
1168
00:55:10,107 --> 00:55:11,342
What?
1169
00:55:11,342 --> 00:55:12,877
- I know that it
sounds ridiculous,
1170
00:55:12,877 --> 00:55:15,680
but shellfish makes
me feel wasted.
1171
00:55:15,680 --> 00:55:20,084
I slur my speech, I lose my
balance, I get all happy.
1172
00:55:21,218 --> 00:55:24,088
- That's bullshit and
completely unfair.
1173
00:55:24,088 --> 00:55:25,289
Hey, it's no picnic,
1174
00:55:25,289 --> 00:55:26,557
I get that pit in my stomach
1175
00:55:26,557 --> 00:55:30,428
every time I pass a Red
Lobster, I swear to God.
1176
00:55:31,662 --> 00:55:33,163
Well, if a bee comes near me,
1177
00:55:33,163 --> 00:55:36,200
it's no party, it's a funeral.
1178
00:55:36,200 --> 00:55:37,735
Oh, death by bee sting,
1179
00:55:37,735 --> 00:55:39,404
what a lousy way to go.
1180
00:55:39,404 --> 00:55:40,871
It almost happened once.
1181
00:55:40,871 --> 00:55:42,773
I was at a family
picnic and I was walking
1182
00:55:42,773 --> 00:55:45,610
and I step on a bee,
boom, anaphylactic shock.
1183
00:55:45,610 --> 00:55:47,144
The next thing I know
I was on a gurney,
1184
00:55:47,144 --> 00:55:49,480
being rushed to the ER in
front of, like, a hundred
1185
00:55:49,480 --> 00:55:52,082
of my relatives, all
panicked and neurotic,
1186
00:55:52,082 --> 00:55:55,820
hence the overcautious
handling of your...
1187
00:55:55,820 --> 00:55:58,856
Were you about to say my nuts?
1188
00:55:58,856 --> 00:56:01,058
(laughing)
1189
00:56:02,460 --> 00:56:04,328
You little, dirty girl.
1190
00:56:04,328 --> 00:56:05,396
Unbelievable.
1191
00:56:06,697 --> 00:56:08,699
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
1192
00:56:08,699 --> 00:56:10,167
So, when we were like, you know,
1193
00:56:10,167 --> 00:56:12,069
fooling around or
whatever last night,
1194
00:56:12,069 --> 00:56:13,438
I could've killed you
1195
00:56:13,438 --> 00:56:16,006
if I had a coconut
daiquiri or something?
1196
00:56:16,006 --> 00:56:18,008
- Well, I wouldn't
have gone home with you
1197
00:56:18,008 --> 00:56:19,410
if you'd had a coconut daiquiri,
1198
00:56:19,410 --> 00:56:23,213
but I might've swelled
up and fainted.
1199
00:56:23,213 --> 00:56:26,651
- My kiss does have
that effect on women.
1200
00:56:38,228 --> 00:56:39,063
Kim?
1201
00:56:40,865 --> 00:56:41,699
Yeah?
1202
00:56:43,233 --> 00:56:46,904
- Wow, it's nice to
actually meet you.
1203
00:56:46,904 --> 00:56:47,805
You, too.
1204
00:56:49,239 --> 00:56:51,742
- Rob said to look for the
girl who walks into the bar
1205
00:56:51,742 --> 00:56:53,944
like she owns the place, so.
1206
00:56:53,944 --> 00:56:54,779
Oh.
1207
00:56:55,780 --> 00:56:58,215
Okay, you're on a blind date?
1208
00:56:59,450 --> 00:57:00,985
Yeah, aren't you?
1209
00:57:02,186 --> 00:57:04,789
Oh, okay, I'm confused,
1210
00:57:04,789 --> 00:57:06,390
you just said that you were Kim.
1211
00:57:06,390 --> 00:57:10,995
- Oh, I know, I just kinda
wanted to go with it, sorry.
1212
00:57:11,829 --> 00:57:12,763
Wow.
1213
00:57:12,763 --> 00:57:15,265
Hold on, what if you are Kim
1214
00:57:15,265 --> 00:57:16,767
but you're not telling
me 'cause, you know,
1215
00:57:16,767 --> 00:57:18,603
you don't think I'm cute.
1216
00:57:18,603 --> 00:57:20,270
Aw.
1217
00:57:20,270 --> 00:57:21,472
No, I think you're cute.
1218
00:57:21,472 --> 00:57:25,275
* Let's play a game
1219
00:57:25,275 --> 00:57:27,444
- What am I supposed
to do with that?
1220
00:57:27,444 --> 00:57:29,814
* I will be the good
1221
00:57:29,814 --> 00:57:30,948
I'll take it now.
1222
00:57:30,948 --> 00:57:33,383
* You could be the bad
1223
00:57:33,383 --> 00:57:35,219
Hey, hey, excuse me.
1224
00:57:36,821 --> 00:57:37,655
Hi.
1225
00:57:38,756 --> 00:57:40,457
Can I get a Jack and coke?
1226
00:57:40,457 --> 00:57:41,959
More Jack than coke.
1227
00:57:41,959 --> 00:57:46,964
* Ask 'em why we
can't just get along *
1228
00:57:48,132 --> 00:57:52,737
* And if they don't
answer to my big knife *
1229
00:57:53,871 --> 00:57:58,876
* You can pull out your 45
1230
00:58:00,144 --> 00:58:05,082
* And they can beg
for their lives *
1231
00:58:09,520 --> 00:58:14,525
* Let's play a game
called Good cop, Bad cop *
1232
00:58:15,492 --> 00:58:18,295
* You can be the good
1233
00:58:18,295 --> 00:58:21,331
* I will be the bad
1234
00:58:21,331 --> 00:58:26,336
* Let's find the lovers
who broke our hearts *
1235
00:58:28,706 --> 00:58:32,877
* And shoot 'em
down just for fun *
1236
00:58:35,179 --> 00:58:38,148
- He isn't really a
black belt, is he?
1237
00:58:38,148 --> 00:58:39,383
That was the one before.
1238
00:58:39,383 --> 00:58:40,217
Oh.
1239
00:58:42,252 --> 00:58:43,087
Yup.
1240
00:58:44,388 --> 00:58:45,355
Yup.
1241
00:58:45,355 --> 00:58:46,190
Yup, what?
1242
00:58:48,425 --> 00:58:49,660
Nothin'.
1243
00:58:49,660 --> 00:58:51,596
- No, yup something,
or no yup at all,
1244
00:58:51,596 --> 00:58:53,530
so what's up with the yup?
1245
00:58:53,530 --> 00:58:54,531
Yup, you're the type of girl
1246
00:58:54,531 --> 00:58:56,701
that always has a boyfriend.
1247
00:58:56,701 --> 00:59:00,170
- Oh, yup, pretty much
since high school.
1248
00:59:00,170 --> 00:59:02,673
- I could tell,
you got that vibe.
1249
00:59:02,673 --> 00:59:04,508
I don't have a vibe.
1250
00:59:04,508 --> 00:59:05,776
You don't?
1251
00:59:05,776 --> 00:59:07,244
Okay.
1252
00:59:07,244 --> 00:59:11,448
What were you doing three
years ago for New Year's Eve?
1253
00:59:11,448 --> 00:59:12,482
Random.
1254
00:59:12,482 --> 00:59:14,518
What were you doing?
1255
00:59:14,518 --> 00:59:15,986
I was with Rick in Aruba.
1256
00:59:15,986 --> 00:59:16,921
Right.
1257
00:59:16,921 --> 00:59:19,489
You were with Rick in Aruba.
1258
00:59:19,489 --> 00:59:22,993
You weren't in Aruba with Rick,
you were with Rick in Aruba.
1259
00:59:22,993 --> 00:59:24,261
Yeah, so?
1260
00:59:24,261 --> 00:59:25,462
- So you figure out
what you were doing
1261
00:59:25,462 --> 00:59:27,197
based on who you
were with, you know?
1262
00:59:27,197 --> 00:59:29,767
Like it's a measurement of time.
1263
00:59:29,767 --> 00:59:31,969
That's a serial
monogamist talking.
1264
00:59:31,969 --> 00:59:34,639
- All right, what's your
longest relationship?
1265
00:59:34,639 --> 00:59:35,773
This.
1266
00:59:35,773 --> 00:59:37,007
Exactly.
1267
00:59:37,007 --> 00:59:38,208
- Okay, what's your
shortest relationship?
1268
00:59:38,208 --> 00:59:39,610
This.
1269
00:59:39,610 --> 00:59:40,544
Right.
1270
00:59:40,544 --> 00:59:41,779
So you're a serial monogamist.
1271
00:59:41,779 --> 00:59:43,347
And you're a serial datist.
1272
00:59:43,347 --> 00:59:45,415
- Okay, well, what
do we have in common?
1273
00:59:45,415 --> 00:59:48,518
- The beginning of
a really bad joke?
1274
00:59:49,954 --> 00:59:53,490
- Look, I admit, I've had my
fair share of meaningless sex,
1275
00:59:53,490 --> 00:59:55,993
but I haven't done
this in quite a while.
1276
00:59:55,993 --> 00:59:57,461
Oh, that's comforting.
1277
00:59:57,461 --> 01:00:01,632
- Yeah, I sort of made a
vow not to do this anymore.
1278
01:00:03,033 --> 01:00:03,868
Like ever.
1279
01:00:06,103 --> 01:00:07,304
You took...
1280
01:00:07,304 --> 01:00:08,773
Oh, my God, you're married?
1281
01:00:08,773 --> 01:00:10,407
No, I'm...
1282
01:00:10,407 --> 01:00:11,441
Yes, you are!
1283
01:00:11,441 --> 01:00:13,443
No, trust me, I'm not married!
1284
01:00:13,443 --> 01:00:14,945
- Then what are
you talking about?
1285
01:00:14,945 --> 01:00:16,781
Look, I can't meet a real girl
1286
01:00:16,781 --> 01:00:20,184
if I'm bangin' a bunch
of worthless chicks.
1287
01:00:20,184 --> 01:00:21,018
Not cool!
1288
01:00:21,018 --> 01:00:22,286
Okay, worthless to me!
1289
01:00:22,286 --> 01:00:23,654
I don't mean you're worthless.
1290
01:00:23,654 --> 01:00:24,922
Oh, I'm sorry, stop!
1291
01:00:24,922 --> 01:00:26,957
Please, stop hitting
me for just a second
1292
01:00:26,957 --> 01:00:29,459
and let me explain, all right?
1293
01:00:35,499 --> 01:00:38,703
It's been seven months
since I woke up next
1294
01:00:38,703 --> 01:00:42,472
to this random Asian girl whose
name I still don't remember,
1295
01:00:42,472 --> 01:00:44,174
and I promised myself right then
1296
01:00:44,174 --> 01:00:49,179
that I wasn't gonna have anymore
unemotional sex ever again.
1297
01:00:50,147 --> 01:00:51,749
- Well, you need
to work on that.
1298
01:00:51,749 --> 01:00:55,920
- Yeah, well, I was doin'
fine up until I met you.
1299
01:00:57,888 --> 01:01:01,591
- So, then why break
this mighty vow over me?
1300
01:01:02,760 --> 01:01:06,096
Call it a moment of weakness.
1301
01:01:06,096 --> 01:01:09,166
- Wow, you really know how
to make a girl feel special.
1302
01:01:09,166 --> 01:01:10,100
- I wasn't trying to--
1303
01:01:10,100 --> 01:01:12,502
Oh, smooth, yeah, keep going.
1304
01:01:12,502 --> 01:01:13,804
No, that's not what I meant.
1305
01:01:13,804 --> 01:01:14,872
I meant that--
1306
01:01:14,872 --> 01:01:16,306
So what, this is all my fault?
1307
01:01:16,306 --> 01:01:17,842
You could've said no, you know.
1308
01:01:17,842 --> 01:01:19,643
I believe that I tried.
1309
01:01:19,643 --> 01:01:21,511
Who the hell knows
with all the poison
1310
01:01:21,511 --> 01:01:23,280
you were feeding me last night.
1311
01:01:23,280 --> 01:01:25,649
- So, what, I got you
drunk and took advantage?
1312
01:01:25,649 --> 01:01:28,485
- Both of those
things did happen.
1313
01:01:29,686 --> 01:01:30,520
Shit.
1314
01:01:31,756 --> 01:01:33,924
You didn't stand a chance.
1315
01:01:33,924 --> 01:01:36,193
I'm the reason that girls
think guys are jerks.
1316
01:01:36,193 --> 01:01:37,361
I'm that girl,
1317
01:01:37,361 --> 01:01:39,296
I hate that girl.
1318
01:01:39,296 --> 01:01:41,398
I give girls like me a bad name!
1319
01:01:41,398 --> 01:01:43,500
I just gave myself a bad name!
1320
01:01:43,500 --> 01:01:47,637
- You know how hard it is to
not have sex for seven months?
1321
01:01:47,637 --> 01:01:49,706
- Please, I was in a
relationship for six years
1322
01:01:49,706 --> 01:01:51,608
that should have
been over after four.
1323
01:01:51,608 --> 01:01:53,410
I get not having
sex for a while.
1324
01:01:53,410 --> 01:01:54,879
Jesus.
1325
01:01:54,879 --> 01:01:56,113
Yeah.
1326
01:01:56,113 --> 01:01:58,382
- You're like the poster
child for monogamy.
1327
01:01:58,382 --> 01:02:00,985
- Well, which is why I don't
have genital herpes, so.
1328
01:02:00,985 --> 01:02:01,819
Oh, that's good to know.
1329
01:02:01,819 --> 01:02:03,954
Yeah, you're welcome.
1330
01:02:03,954 --> 01:02:07,191
- All right, so since
we're here, you know,
1331
01:02:07,191 --> 01:02:10,027
and we did what
we did last night,
1332
01:02:11,295 --> 01:02:13,931
there's something
I wanna ask you.
1333
01:02:13,931 --> 01:02:14,765
Do I...
1334
01:02:16,600 --> 01:02:17,434
Do I...
1335
01:02:22,239 --> 01:02:23,140
Never mind.
1336
01:02:24,708 --> 01:02:25,943
You did not just do that.
1337
01:02:25,943 --> 01:02:27,511
- Okay, I'm sorry
that I did that,
1338
01:02:27,511 --> 01:02:28,712
I hate it when people do that,
1339
01:02:28,712 --> 01:02:31,048
but I just don't
wanna talk about it.
1340
01:02:31,048 --> 01:02:32,149
Come on, just say it.
1341
01:02:32,149 --> 01:02:33,283
No, I don't, just forget it,
1342
01:02:33,283 --> 01:02:35,886
forget I ever said anything.
1343
01:02:35,886 --> 01:02:38,455
(Holly screams)
1344
01:02:38,455 --> 01:02:41,191
What the hell was that?
1345
01:02:41,191 --> 01:02:42,326
What are you talking about?
1346
01:02:42,326 --> 01:02:44,428
That is very bizarre.
1347
01:02:44,428 --> 01:02:46,530
You freaked the guy
out right next to us.
1348
01:02:46,530 --> 01:02:47,364
[Holly] What guy?
1349
01:02:47,364 --> 01:02:48,966
He's a sensitive soul.
1350
01:02:48,966 --> 01:02:50,434
Yeah, right.
1351
01:02:50,434 --> 01:02:54,638
Are you gonna ask me what
you were gonna ask me or not?
1352
01:02:56,506 --> 01:02:58,608
- Do I look like an
epileptic when I cum?
1353
01:02:58,608 --> 01:03:00,811
(laughing)
1354
01:03:01,745 --> 01:03:02,579
What?
1355
01:03:03,747 --> 01:03:05,415
- Totally, is that what
you were gonna ask me?
1356
01:03:05,415 --> 01:03:07,751
- Wait, I do, seriously?
- Yeah.
1357
01:03:07,751 --> 01:03:09,219
Shit, really?
1358
01:03:09,219 --> 01:03:11,121
Yeah, you go, uh, uh, uh.
1359
01:03:11,121 --> 01:03:12,789
Yeah, you like that?
1360
01:03:14,191 --> 01:03:16,593
- What, that's not
what, no, come on.
1361
01:03:16,593 --> 01:03:18,662
- I literally thought
that you'd stuck your foot
1362
01:03:18,662 --> 01:03:21,665
in like an electrical
socket or something.
1363
01:03:21,665 --> 01:03:24,068
That's just, that's stupid.
1364
01:03:27,137 --> 01:03:28,338
Okay, okay, I get it,
1365
01:03:28,338 --> 01:03:30,674
you can stop laughing at me.
1366
01:03:32,910 --> 01:03:34,211
With the eye and everything?
1367
01:03:34,211 --> 01:03:36,280
What, I look like Popeye.
1368
01:03:37,948 --> 01:03:40,484
That's ridiculous, I don't
even wanna look at myself.
1369
01:03:40,484 --> 01:03:41,785
Geez.
1370
01:03:41,785 --> 01:03:43,220
- Did somebody actually
say this to you?
1371
01:03:43,220 --> 01:03:45,655
- Yes, yes, but she
wasn't wearing her glasses
1372
01:03:45,655 --> 01:03:46,891
when we were doin' it,
1373
01:03:46,891 --> 01:03:50,094
so I didn't know if
she was to be trusted.
1374
01:03:50,094 --> 01:03:51,595
It's just weird, I just...
1375
01:03:51,595 --> 01:03:53,330
I've practiced this in the
mirror like a million times,
1376
01:03:53,330 --> 01:03:56,200
but every time I start to
get there my eyes close,
1377
01:03:56,200 --> 01:03:57,434
and I can't see anything.
1378
01:03:57,434 --> 01:03:59,403
(laughing)
1379
01:03:59,403 --> 01:04:00,770
No, I'm serious.
1380
01:04:00,770 --> 01:04:03,440
I literally, I physically
cannot, I know.
1381
01:04:03,440 --> 01:04:04,909
I'm gonna pee my pants.
1382
01:04:04,909 --> 01:04:07,777
- I can't keep my eyes open,
there's no, it's like a sneeze.
1383
01:04:07,777 --> 01:04:10,147
Like they just shut, you know?
1384
01:04:10,147 --> 01:04:11,748
And then after
that, I'm just like,
1385
01:04:11,748 --> 01:04:14,985
uh, who gives a shit
what I look like.
1386
01:04:16,987 --> 01:04:18,155
Oh, God, oh.
1387
01:04:20,891 --> 01:04:22,927
There's something you
should know, by the way,
1388
01:04:22,927 --> 01:04:23,994
something else.
1389
01:04:23,994 --> 01:04:24,828
What, oh God.
1390
01:04:24,828 --> 01:04:26,296
No, no, no, no.
1391
01:04:26,296 --> 01:04:28,565
It's just that last night
when I was down there,
1392
01:04:28,565 --> 01:04:33,137
you know, I didn't actually,
I didn't actually swallow.
1393
01:04:34,004 --> 01:04:35,139
Wait, you didn't?
1394
01:04:35,139 --> 01:04:37,007
No, I just...
1395
01:04:37,007 --> 01:04:39,276
I spit it out on the floor.
1396
01:04:40,510 --> 01:04:43,080
- Hold on, how the hell
did I not know what?
1397
01:04:43,080 --> 01:04:45,215
What are you, a magician?
1398
01:04:45,215 --> 01:04:46,683
I'm just wondering,
because, you know,
1399
01:04:46,683 --> 01:04:48,618
it's not like I was in a
meeting, I was right there.
1400
01:04:48,618 --> 01:04:51,388
- I know, well, you were
in the throes of your.
1401
01:04:51,388 --> 01:04:53,857
- Okay, all right,
we've covered that.
1402
01:04:53,857 --> 01:04:55,459
I don't know, that's
a little weird.
1403
01:04:55,459 --> 01:04:59,829
- And expecting me to swallow
a stranger's man milk isn't?
1404
01:04:59,829 --> 01:05:02,332
- I don't know, it's a
recreational hazard, right?
1405
01:05:02,332 --> 01:05:05,335
Unless it's on your allergen
list, what's the big deal?
1406
01:05:05,335 --> 01:05:06,870
- It's just really
personal, you know,
1407
01:05:06,870 --> 01:05:08,405
if we were dating it
would be different.
1408
01:05:08,405 --> 01:05:09,739
Okay, how does the definition
1409
01:05:09,739 --> 01:05:11,575
of a relationship
change anything?
1410
01:05:11,575 --> 01:05:13,077
You're either doin'
what you're doin'
1411
01:05:13,077 --> 01:05:14,644
with the guy you're doin'
it with, or you're not.
1412
01:05:14,644 --> 01:05:17,014
- Well, sue me for wanting
to know a guy a little better
1413
01:05:17,014 --> 01:05:19,116
before I have a pool
party in my stomach
1414
01:05:19,116 --> 01:05:21,585
with 100 million of
his closest friends.
1415
01:05:21,585 --> 01:05:23,053
Wow, that is a case
1416
01:05:23,053 --> 01:05:25,889
that I just might pursue,
right there, counsel.
1417
01:05:25,889 --> 01:05:29,726
I mean, you know, you spit out
my essence like a Gobstopper.
1418
01:05:29,726 --> 01:05:30,927
Come on.
1419
01:05:30,927 --> 01:05:31,895
- You kill a country
full of my DNA.
1420
01:05:31,895 --> 01:05:33,663
That's genocide!
1421
01:05:33,663 --> 01:05:34,798
You're a monster!
1422
01:05:34,798 --> 01:05:36,200
Oh, my God!
1423
01:05:36,200 --> 01:05:37,867
You're a Republican.
1424
01:05:39,269 --> 01:05:40,670
My parents are both Republicans,
1425
01:05:40,670 --> 01:05:42,106
but just 'cause they
wanna save money.
1426
01:05:42,106 --> 01:05:44,241
They're pro-choice
and for gay rights,
1427
01:05:44,241 --> 01:05:45,875
it doesn't make an sense.
1428
01:05:45,875 --> 01:05:47,944
- Yeah, well, my sister's
a ham-eating Jew,
1429
01:05:47,944 --> 01:05:49,779
what are you gonna do?
1430
01:05:50,847 --> 01:05:52,349
I find it interesting
1431
01:05:52,349 --> 01:05:55,352
that people just hear the
parts that they wanna hear.
1432
01:05:55,352 --> 01:05:56,886
- I'm sorry, did
you say something?
1433
01:05:56,886 --> 01:05:58,122
Pork is nasty.
1434
01:05:58,122 --> 01:06:01,325
- Well, we can finally
agree on something.
1435
01:06:02,459 --> 01:06:03,693
- I used to eat
all kinds of animal
1436
01:06:03,693 --> 01:06:05,495
before I watched
this documentary.
1437
01:06:05,495 --> 01:06:07,697
- Oh, no, come on, come
on, please don't with that
1438
01:06:07,697 --> 01:06:09,466
'cause I really
love me some steak
1439
01:06:09,466 --> 01:06:11,401
and I don't wanna ruin it.
1440
01:06:11,401 --> 01:06:12,902
You think that that's better?
1441
01:06:12,902 --> 01:06:15,405
They hang the animal upside
down and they slit its throat
1442
01:06:15,405 --> 01:06:16,873
and they just let it
bleed out on the floor!
1443
01:06:16,873 --> 01:06:19,209
- La-la-la, don't
ruin this for me!
1444
01:06:19,209 --> 01:06:20,644
Just a minute ago you
were talkin' about
1445
01:06:20,644 --> 01:06:22,612
how you swallowed my, you know,
1446
01:06:22,612 --> 01:06:23,947
my, however you put it,
1447
01:06:23,947 --> 01:06:25,082
can we just get back to that?
1448
01:06:25,082 --> 01:06:26,450
No, 'cause I didn't!
1449
01:06:26,450 --> 01:06:27,884
Yeah, I know you didn't,
1450
01:06:27,884 --> 01:06:29,153
but you acted like you did,
1451
01:06:29,153 --> 01:06:31,588
which I thought was
really sweet, really.
1452
01:06:31,588 --> 01:06:33,090
La-la-la-la-la-la!
1453
01:06:35,725 --> 01:06:37,694
Okay, you're safe.
1454
01:06:37,694 --> 01:06:38,528
Promise?
1455
01:06:38,528 --> 01:06:39,363
Yeah.
1456
01:06:40,264 --> 01:06:42,732
It's just that there's all this
1457
01:06:42,732 --> 01:06:44,801
fecal matter in the hamburger.
1458
01:06:44,801 --> 01:06:47,171
Oh, you went to
the fecal matter.
1459
01:06:47,171 --> 01:06:48,004
I'm sorry.
1460
01:06:48,004 --> 01:06:48,838
That's ridiculous.
1461
01:06:48,838 --> 01:06:50,874
Done, sustained!
1462
01:06:50,874 --> 01:06:52,342
People like you.
1463
01:06:52,342 --> 01:06:55,179
All you wanna do is lock
people up in your tofu jail,
1464
01:06:55,179 --> 01:06:56,946
you blood-sucking lawyer.
1465
01:06:56,946 --> 01:06:59,183
- You're the one that
wanted to be dead honest.
1466
01:06:59,183 --> 01:07:00,650
Yeah, but not about that.
1467
01:07:00,650 --> 01:07:01,885
In fact, not about anything
1468
01:07:01,885 --> 01:07:04,821
that would change
my view on anything.
1469
01:07:04,821 --> 01:07:06,356
Way to grow.
1470
01:07:06,356 --> 01:07:09,326
- You slap me,
you call me names.
1471
01:07:09,326 --> 01:07:10,627
I didn't call you any names,
1472
01:07:10,627 --> 01:07:13,297
what names did I call you?
1473
01:07:13,297 --> 01:07:14,131
Layman?
1474
01:07:15,499 --> 01:07:16,866
- Oh, well, I'm sure
you've been called worse.
1475
01:07:16,866 --> 01:07:17,967
And Steven.
1476
01:07:19,503 --> 01:07:21,638
That's pretty bad.
1477
01:07:21,638 --> 01:07:23,840
- And now I don't know if I
can eat a hamburger anymore.
1478
01:07:23,840 --> 01:07:26,476
- Oh boo-hoo, I ruined Hanukah.
1479
01:07:26,476 --> 01:07:27,644
- Whoa-whoa-whoa, hold on.
1480
01:07:27,644 --> 01:07:29,446
Do you know the license
plate to this car?
1481
01:07:29,446 --> 01:07:30,280
No, how would I?
1482
01:07:30,280 --> 01:07:31,948
- Yeah, it's APR-15,
1483
01:07:32,816 --> 01:07:34,284
do you know what that means?
1484
01:07:34,284 --> 01:07:35,219
April 15th?
1485
01:07:35,219 --> 01:07:38,021
April 15th, and you know why?
1486
01:07:38,021 --> 01:07:39,489
Because it's my car,
1487
01:07:39,489 --> 01:07:42,592
it's registered to me
under my name, my address,
1488
01:07:42,592 --> 01:07:44,761
my car, that means my rules.
1489
01:07:44,761 --> 01:07:46,730
When you're in your
car it's your rules,
1490
01:07:46,730 --> 01:07:47,931
but now you're in my car,
1491
01:07:47,931 --> 01:07:50,467
April 15th, my rules.
1492
01:07:50,467 --> 01:07:51,701
Okay, Dad.
1493
01:07:51,701 --> 01:07:53,170
- Okay, so you go
over to your window
1494
01:07:53,170 --> 01:07:55,839
and think about what you've
done, I'm callin' five minutes.
1495
01:07:55,839 --> 01:07:57,307
- You can't call five
minutes, that's my thing!
1496
01:07:57,307 --> 01:07:58,375
April 15th!
1497
01:08:05,182 --> 01:08:08,785
("When I Go" by Slow Club)
1498
01:08:24,067 --> 01:08:28,138
* If we're both
not married by 22 *
1499
01:08:28,138 --> 01:08:32,242
* Could I be so
bold and ask you *
1500
01:08:32,242 --> 01:08:37,247
* If we're both
not married by 23 *
1501
01:08:38,515 --> 01:08:41,651
* Will you make my
year, and ask me *
1502
01:08:41,651 --> 01:08:45,822
* If we're both
not married by 24 *
1503
01:08:45,822 --> 01:08:49,893
* Will you pass me those knee
pads and I'll get on the floor *
1504
01:08:49,893 --> 01:08:52,762
* If we're both
not married by 25 *
1505
01:08:52,762 --> 01:08:55,165
- There is no crying
on ladies night.
1506
01:08:55,165 --> 01:08:57,534
* I hope that there's some
childish spark still alive *
1507
01:08:57,534 --> 01:09:00,637
Smile, there's free
drinks till nine.
1508
01:09:00,637 --> 01:09:02,138
There we go, that's a smile,
1509
01:09:02,138 --> 01:09:04,174
come on, free drinks till nine.
1510
01:09:04,174 --> 01:09:06,543
Free drinks till nine?
1511
01:09:06,543 --> 01:09:07,477
Beautiful ladies
that are crying,
1512
01:09:07,477 --> 01:09:09,879
double free drinks till nine.
1513
01:09:12,449 --> 01:09:13,283
Yes!
1514
01:09:14,818 --> 01:09:17,987
Yes, all right,
you're gonna have fun.
1515
01:09:20,757 --> 01:09:21,725
You see that shit?
1516
01:09:21,725 --> 01:09:22,559
I'm gonna hit that,
1517
01:09:22,559 --> 01:09:23,393
oh, I'm gonna hit that.
1518
01:09:23,393 --> 01:09:25,161
* My hand when I go
1519
01:09:25,161 --> 01:09:29,299
* Will you hold my
hand when I go *
1520
01:09:29,299 --> 01:09:31,901
* Will you hold my hand
1521
01:09:31,901 --> 01:09:34,238
* When I go
1522
01:09:36,172 --> 01:09:37,207
Kim?
1523
01:09:37,207 --> 01:09:38,041
Yeah.
1524
01:09:53,423 --> 01:09:57,561
* If I get to 30 and
I don't have a wife *
1525
01:09:57,561 --> 01:10:01,598
* I'll ask you nicely,
but I won't ask twice *
1526
01:10:01,598 --> 01:10:06,603
* If I get to 40 and I
don't have a spouse *
1527
01:10:07,337 --> 01:10:08,272
- Boom, whoa-ho-ho!
1528
01:10:10,240 --> 01:10:11,841
- Who calls that
on a river, man?
1529
01:10:11,841 --> 01:10:14,110
I don't know who does it.
1530
01:10:16,580 --> 01:10:20,817
* If I get to 60, will
you let me slip away *
1531
01:10:20,817 --> 01:10:24,688
* Into an armchair for
the rest of my days *
1532
01:10:24,688 --> 01:10:27,190
* 'Cause you've got your
family and I've got mine *
1533
01:10:27,190 --> 01:10:30,294
- [Mom] Did you give her a
kiss and say you're sorry?
1534
01:10:30,294 --> 01:10:31,695
- You guys could do
a high-five, yeah.
1535
01:10:31,695 --> 01:10:33,096
Can you blow it?
1536
01:10:33,096 --> 01:10:34,431
Oh, that's good.
1537
01:10:36,900 --> 01:10:38,402
Yeah, no really.
1538
01:10:39,403 --> 01:10:41,638
Tell me, tell me the truth.
1539
01:10:42,839 --> 01:10:44,608
You know you miss me.
1540
01:10:45,909 --> 01:10:48,812
(speaking in a foreign language)
1541
01:10:48,812 --> 01:10:52,115
- What time is
firework spectacle?
1542
01:10:52,115 --> 01:10:55,352
(speaking in a foreign language)
1543
01:10:55,352 --> 01:10:58,355
Is this the line
for Space Mountain?
1544
01:11:00,223 --> 01:11:01,725
- [Traffic Reporter]
And, finally, an update
1545
01:11:01,725 --> 01:11:03,827
for those of you stuck in
that dead-stop traffic jam.
1546
01:11:03,827 --> 01:11:05,429
It turns out, and
get a load of this,
1547
01:11:05,429 --> 01:11:07,464
the reason for the
delay is because of a--
1548
01:11:07,464 --> 01:11:09,132
* My hand, when I go
1549
01:11:09,132 --> 01:11:12,969
* Will you hold my
hand when I go *
1550
01:11:12,969 --> 01:11:15,972
(breathing heavily)
1551
01:11:17,541 --> 01:11:18,642
Okay, okay.
1552
01:11:19,876 --> 01:11:20,777
Okay, okay.
1553
01:11:22,211 --> 01:11:23,880
You can handle this.
1554
01:11:40,830 --> 01:11:41,665
Oh, God.
1555
01:12:00,617 --> 01:12:03,186
(car starting)
1556
01:12:04,187 --> 01:12:05,389
Oh, no.
1557
01:12:05,389 --> 01:12:06,623
What?
1558
01:12:06,623 --> 01:12:08,392
- I think we're
starting to move.
1559
01:12:08,392 --> 01:12:09,225
Oh.
1560
01:12:11,327 --> 01:12:12,161
Great.
1561
01:12:14,664 --> 01:12:15,499
Just.
1562
01:12:16,766 --> 01:12:18,435
I'll make sure that.
1563
01:12:26,075 --> 01:12:27,611
- I think your seat
was a little more.
1564
01:12:27,611 --> 01:12:28,578
Oh, just a little more up?
1565
01:12:28,578 --> 01:12:29,679
Yeah.
1566
01:12:29,679 --> 01:12:30,514
Like that?
1567
01:12:30,514 --> 01:12:31,347
Like, yeah.
1568
01:12:31,347 --> 01:12:32,348
There we go.
1569
01:12:32,348 --> 01:12:35,985
(horns honking)
Okay, all right!
1570
01:12:35,985 --> 01:12:36,820
Hold on.
1571
01:12:36,820 --> 01:12:37,687
What?
1572
01:12:37,687 --> 01:12:38,522
Seatbelt.
1573
01:12:38,522 --> 01:12:39,523
Ah, right.
1574
01:13:02,045 --> 01:13:04,648
(upbeat music)
1575
01:13:14,157 --> 01:13:15,324
I got it, Dad.
1576
01:13:17,794 --> 01:13:19,929
Yes, I'm not sleeping
with anybody,
1577
01:13:19,929 --> 01:13:21,965
you can let mom know that.
1578
01:13:21,965 --> 01:13:22,832
I gotta go into this thing,
1579
01:13:22,832 --> 01:13:24,000
all right, I love you.
1580
01:13:24,000 --> 01:13:25,702
- Ladies lookin'
right on Ladies Night.
1581
01:13:25,702 --> 01:13:26,736
Come on, it's free cover!
1582
01:13:26,736 --> 01:13:27,571
No!
1583
01:13:28,738 --> 01:13:29,806
Hey.
1584
01:13:29,806 --> 01:13:31,575
It's 10 bucks, bro.
1585
01:13:32,909 --> 01:13:35,044
- It's 10 bucks.
- Right.
1586
01:13:35,044 --> 01:13:36,546
That's, okay, man.
1587
01:13:37,581 --> 01:13:39,315
Hey, you have a good time.
1588
01:13:39,315 --> 01:13:40,584
* Gonna kick in my door
1589
01:13:40,584 --> 01:13:42,552
* I'm dating defeat
1590
01:13:42,552 --> 01:13:45,221
* I got no friends 'cause
the damage is done *
1591
01:13:45,221 --> 01:13:48,458
* I am packin' my bags
1592
01:13:53,329 --> 01:13:54,731
What'll it be?
1593
01:13:54,731 --> 01:13:58,067
- Oh, I'm actually
waiting for somebody, so.
1594
01:14:07,443 --> 01:14:11,414
- So, what, you're just gonna
sit at my bar and not drink?
1595
01:14:11,414 --> 01:14:14,050
- No, I'm gonna drink, I'm
just gonna wait for her,
1596
01:14:14,050 --> 01:14:17,220
- and then we'll both--
- Cheap asshole.
1597
01:14:18,287 --> 01:14:19,122
What?
1598
01:14:26,896 --> 01:14:29,933
* You and I, you and I
1599
01:14:29,933 --> 01:14:33,036
* All we need is who we are
1600
01:14:33,036 --> 01:14:36,005
* We can be, we can be
1601
01:14:36,005 --> 01:14:40,009
* Brighter than
a shooting star *
1602
01:14:52,589 --> 01:14:53,422
Hey.
1603
01:14:54,758 --> 01:14:56,860
Hey, you made it.
1604
01:14:56,860 --> 01:14:57,961
How you doin', Dad?
1605
01:14:57,961 --> 01:14:59,262
I'm doing good.
1606
01:14:59,262 --> 01:15:00,396
How about you?
1607
01:15:01,998 --> 01:15:02,832
Are you good?
1608
01:15:02,832 --> 01:15:03,867
Yeah, I'm fine.
1609
01:15:03,867 --> 01:15:04,868
You sure?
1610
01:15:04,868 --> 01:15:06,135
Yeah, I'm good.
1611
01:15:06,135 --> 01:15:07,370
- Okay, I've been
bragging about you
1612
01:15:07,370 --> 01:15:09,005
to your Uncle Ken
and his wife Stella.
1613
01:15:09,005 --> 01:15:09,839
Okay.
1614
01:15:11,040 --> 01:15:12,308
Holly!
1615
01:15:12,308 --> 01:15:14,277
[Holly] Hello.
1616
01:15:14,277 --> 01:15:16,613
Look how beautiful you are!
1617
01:15:16,613 --> 01:15:18,081
[Holly] Thank you.
1618
01:15:18,081 --> 01:15:21,718
- So which one of these
gorgeous little kids are yours?
1619
01:15:21,718 --> 01:15:23,219
I'm not married.
1620
01:15:23,219 --> 01:15:27,290
- Oh, well, I don't think
you have to be anymore.
1621
01:15:29,893 --> 01:15:31,795
Oh, there she is with dad,
1622
01:15:31,795 --> 01:15:34,363
talking to cousins
number 28 and 29.
1623
01:15:34,363 --> 01:15:36,499
- No, that's
definitely some kind
1624
01:15:36,499 --> 01:15:38,501
of aunt and uncle of some sort.
1625
01:15:38,501 --> 01:15:40,336
- Oh, God, she's giving
me the save me eyes.
1626
01:15:40,336 --> 01:15:41,605
Quick, call her over.
1627
01:15:41,605 --> 01:15:43,472
- Your face was blown
up like a big tomato,
1628
01:15:43,472 --> 01:15:45,809
the bee sting, do
you remember that?
1629
01:15:45,809 --> 01:15:47,010
(laughing)
1630
01:15:47,010 --> 01:15:49,846
- Oh, my God, we've
had so much fun.
1631
01:15:49,846 --> 01:15:51,447
Hols!
1632
01:15:51,447 --> 01:15:52,849
Hi!
1633
01:15:52,849 --> 01:15:55,952
- Oh, sorry, so nice
to meet you Uncle Ken.
1634
01:15:55,952 --> 01:15:59,188
- Great to see you again.
- Aunt Stella.
1635
01:16:01,490 --> 01:16:03,126
- What is she doing
with her hair?
1636
01:16:03,126 --> 01:16:05,294
Okay, stop it.
1637
01:16:05,294 --> 01:16:06,129
Thanks, guys.
1638
01:16:06,129 --> 01:16:08,031
Hey, sis, nice shoes.
1639
01:16:08,031 --> 01:16:10,133
- Oh, thanks, you've
seen these before.
1640
01:16:10,133 --> 01:16:10,967
I know.
1641
01:16:12,769 --> 01:16:13,937
Where's, Rick?
1642
01:16:13,937 --> 01:16:14,771
Oh, yeah.
1643
01:16:14,771 --> 01:16:16,105
Oh, he's good.
1644
01:16:19,242 --> 01:16:20,744
Um, where is he?
1645
01:16:21,811 --> 01:16:22,646
Uh.
1646
01:16:23,880 --> 01:16:24,714
Oh, no.
1647
01:16:24,714 --> 01:16:25,548
What happened?
1648
01:16:25,548 --> 01:16:26,482
Noth...
1649
01:16:26,482 --> 01:16:27,283
What are you talking about?
1650
01:16:27,283 --> 01:16:29,853
Oh, shut up, again?
1651
01:16:29,853 --> 01:16:32,756
- You know, it's for the
best, it wasn't right.
1652
01:16:32,756 --> 01:16:34,123
He wasn't ready, you know.
1653
01:16:34,123 --> 01:16:36,325
- But why are they
all never ready?
1654
01:16:36,325 --> 01:16:40,664
- I don't know, but I'm not
gonna waste my time, so.
1655
01:16:40,664 --> 01:16:43,199
- Well, we're way past that
point by now, aren't we?
1656
01:16:43,199 --> 01:16:44,734
- Oh yeah, I mean,
after three years,
1657
01:16:44,734 --> 01:16:46,903
he's still not sure at this age?
1658
01:16:46,903 --> 01:16:48,104
There must be something
else going on.
1659
01:16:48,104 --> 01:16:50,674
- I mean, this is crazy,
he was a good one.
1660
01:16:50,674 --> 01:16:51,607
Yeah.
1661
01:16:51,607 --> 01:16:54,277
Not to mention, gorgeous!
1662
01:16:54,277 --> 01:16:57,413
- I mean, I completely
picture you two together.
1663
01:16:57,413 --> 01:16:58,614
You're a cute couple!
1664
01:16:58,614 --> 01:17:00,383
What exactly did you do?
1665
01:17:00,383 --> 01:17:01,785
I didn't do anything.
1666
01:17:01,785 --> 01:17:03,252
Well, maybe that's the issue.
1667
01:17:03,252 --> 01:17:04,487
- Oh, yeah, remember when
you broke up with Max,
1668
01:17:04,487 --> 01:17:06,489
and he said he felt like
he wasn't number one.
1669
01:17:06,489 --> 01:17:08,124
- Wasn't it the same
with David, too?
1670
01:17:08,124 --> 01:17:09,492
There's something with you?
1671
01:17:09,492 --> 01:17:10,326
Excuse me?
1672
01:17:10,326 --> 01:17:11,194
Be nice.
1673
01:17:11,194 --> 01:17:12,395
I am nice.
1674
01:17:12,395 --> 01:17:14,397
- Did you ever think
that maybe it's not me,
1675
01:17:14,397 --> 01:17:16,265
maybe it's them?
1676
01:17:16,265 --> 01:17:17,834
- You're the only
common denominator
1677
01:17:17,834 --> 01:17:20,269
in your relationships, Holly.
1678
01:17:20,269 --> 01:17:23,172
- Well, there still must be
some way we can fix this.
1679
01:17:23,172 --> 01:17:24,640
There's nothing to fix.
1680
01:17:24,640 --> 01:17:28,344
- I just think the fixing maybe
needs to happen right here.
1681
01:17:28,344 --> 01:17:29,713
Still, not nice.
1682
01:17:29,713 --> 01:17:30,546
Vicious.
1683
01:17:30,546 --> 01:17:32,081
Well, she's drunk.
1684
01:17:32,081 --> 01:17:33,082
I mean, it's the truth,
1685
01:17:33,082 --> 01:17:35,484
she just needs to swallow it.
1686
01:17:37,086 --> 01:17:39,222
- Okay, I'm done.
- No, sweetie!
1687
01:17:39,222 --> 01:17:41,791
- Just don't do anything
before you think about it.
1688
01:17:41,791 --> 01:17:42,959
Those shoes.
1689
01:17:45,294 --> 01:17:48,798
- [Holly] It's this
red one up here.
1690
01:17:48,798 --> 01:17:50,299
- Ah.
- This is me.
1691
01:17:59,175 --> 01:18:00,076
- So.
- So.
1692
01:18:08,852 --> 01:18:11,921
I think I found a way for
you to keep your record.
1693
01:18:11,921 --> 01:18:13,089
My record?
1694
01:18:13,089 --> 01:18:14,590
Yeah.
1695
01:18:14,590 --> 01:18:18,561
Oh, of, never having done
this one-night thing before.
1696
01:18:18,561 --> 01:18:20,029
Oh, my record.
1697
01:18:20,029 --> 01:18:20,964
Yeah.
1698
01:18:20,964 --> 01:18:21,898
Well, I'm not sure that's what
1699
01:18:21,898 --> 01:18:23,699
this still is, technically.
1700
01:18:23,699 --> 01:18:25,434
- Well, I think technically
it is, you know,
1701
01:18:25,434 --> 01:18:27,370
until we do it again.
1702
01:18:27,370 --> 01:18:30,439
So, that's all we
have to do, right?
1703
01:18:30,439 --> 01:18:32,842
You know, see each other
again is what I'm proposing,
1704
01:18:32,842 --> 01:18:34,077
not just like--
1705
01:18:34,077 --> 01:18:36,045
- Oh, yeah, for the
sake of my record.
1706
01:18:36,045 --> 01:18:38,481
Strictly for that, yes.
1707
01:18:38,481 --> 01:18:40,049
Yeah, okay, okay.
1708
01:18:43,920 --> 01:18:46,422
Nice to meet you, Guy, really.
1709
01:18:47,290 --> 01:18:48,124
Actually.
1710
01:18:49,993 --> 01:18:51,494
You, too, Holly.
1711
01:18:57,266 --> 01:18:58,101
Oh.
1712
01:19:02,772 --> 01:19:03,940
Kay.
1713
01:19:03,940 --> 01:19:05,341
Um, each other.
1714
01:19:07,010 --> 01:19:07,844
What?
1715
01:19:09,378 --> 01:19:11,580
- What do a serial datist
and a serial monogamist
1716
01:19:11,580 --> 01:19:12,816
have in common?
1717
01:19:14,217 --> 01:19:15,284
Each other.
1718
01:19:15,284 --> 01:19:18,387
(light upbeat music)
1719
01:19:23,893 --> 01:19:32,401
* Oh, oh, oh, oh
1720
01:19:32,401 --> 01:19:34,437
* Let's run away together
1721
01:19:34,437 --> 01:19:36,739
* You drive until you're tired
1722
01:19:36,739 --> 01:19:38,908
* I'll sing till
you get better *
1723
01:19:38,908 --> 01:19:41,277
* You'll see the
stars in my eyes *
1724
01:19:41,277 --> 01:19:43,412
* You'll bring your
favorite sweater *
1725
01:19:43,412 --> 01:19:45,548
* I'll bring my tambourine
1726
01:19:45,548 --> 01:19:47,783
* Our songs can last forever
1727
01:19:47,783 --> 01:19:51,254
* It's like a movie scene
1728
01:19:51,254 --> 01:19:55,658
* Let's not stop until
we reach the stars *
1729
01:19:55,658 --> 01:20:00,063
* If I'm with you then
nowhere seems too far *
1730
01:20:00,063 --> 01:20:04,400
* I feel the distance
and it's calling me *
1731
01:20:04,400 --> 01:20:08,504
* Something about it
makes me believe *
1732
01:20:08,504 --> 01:20:12,241
* Oh, oh, oh, oh
1733
01:20:12,241 --> 01:20:15,144
(fast dance music)
1734
01:20:48,444 --> 01:20:50,446
* You make me wanna
1735
01:20:50,446 --> 01:20:52,515
* Make me wanna rub it good
1736
01:20:52,515 --> 01:20:54,217
* I ain't tryin'
to fall in love *
1737
01:20:54,217 --> 01:20:56,986
* I just wanna
1738
01:20:56,986 --> 01:20:57,853
* I want it
1739
01:20:57,853 --> 01:20:59,088
* Come and get it
1740
01:20:59,088 --> 01:21:00,289
* I want it now
1741
01:21:00,289 --> 01:21:02,525
* I want it right now
1742
01:21:02,525 --> 01:21:03,993
* I want it now
1743
01:21:03,993 --> 01:21:06,329
* I want it right now
1744
01:21:06,329 --> 01:21:07,830
* I want it now
1745
01:21:07,830 --> 01:21:09,765
* I want it right now
1746
01:21:09,765 --> 01:21:11,534
* I want it now
1747
01:21:11,534 --> 01:21:14,703
* I want it right now
1748
01:21:27,883 --> 01:21:32,521
* Give me some
1749
01:21:32,521 --> 01:21:34,023
* I want it now
1750
01:21:34,023 --> 01:21:35,858
* I want it right now
1751
01:21:35,858 --> 01:21:37,660
* I want it now
1752
01:21:37,660 --> 01:21:40,829
* I want it right now
1753
01:21:54,343 --> 01:21:56,279
* Oh
1754
01:21:56,279 --> 01:21:57,413
* Baby
1755
01:21:57,413 --> 01:22:00,083
* Turn it on
1756
01:22:00,083 --> 01:22:01,917
* Yeah, yeah, I got it
1757
01:22:01,917 --> 01:22:03,619
* Don't you want it
1758
01:22:03,619 --> 01:22:06,889
* Yeah, yeah, I got it
1759
01:22:14,130 --> 01:22:15,031
* Touch it
1760
01:22:15,031 --> 01:22:15,965
* Prove it
1761
01:22:15,965 --> 01:22:16,799
* Rub it
1762
01:22:16,799 --> 01:22:17,800
* Prove it
1763
01:22:17,800 --> 01:22:18,734
* Hit it
1764
01:22:18,734 --> 01:22:19,668
* Tap it
1765
01:22:19,668 --> 01:22:21,404
* Oh
1766
01:22:50,666 --> 01:22:52,101
* You make me wanna
1767
01:22:52,101 --> 01:22:54,137
* Make me wanna rub it up
1768
01:22:54,137 --> 01:22:56,439
* I ain't tryin'
to fall in love *
1769
01:22:56,439 --> 01:22:59,542
* I just wanna
1770
01:22:59,542 --> 01:23:02,978
* Come get it
1771
01:23:02,978 --> 01:23:05,248
* Come and get it
1772
01:23:05,248 --> 01:23:06,915
* Want it now
1773
01:23:06,915 --> 01:23:09,052
* Want it right now
1774
01:23:09,052 --> 01:23:10,753
* Want it now
1775
01:23:10,753 --> 01:23:12,655
* Want it right now
1776
01:23:12,655 --> 01:23:14,357
* Want it now
1777
01:23:14,357 --> 01:23:18,561
* Want it right now
1778
01:23:18,561 --> 01:23:21,564
* Don't you want it
112897
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