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[music playing]
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NARRATOR: The Dick Van Dyke Show.
3
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Starring Dick Van Dyke, Rose Marie, Morey
Amsterdam, Larry Matthews, and Mary Tyler Moore.
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Hey, hey I got one.
6
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I got one, you ready?
7
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Yeah, I'm ready, but is the world ready?
8
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Who needs em.
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All right, listen to this.
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What happens to ducks that fly upside down?
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They quack up.
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I knew you didn't know it.
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Rob, Allen's is not going to use junk like that on the show.
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Why not?
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He's using junk like you on the show.
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Mel, you going to be able to help us out on this?
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Well I don't know.
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What's this request I got for prisoner costumes?
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We're not doing a prison sketch on the show this week.
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Oh, it's not for the Alan Brady Show, it's for our show.
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- Your show? - Yeah.
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You see, we've been invited to do a benefit.
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And we're trying to put a few things together.
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Do you think we can get the costumes Mel?
25
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Well, I don't know.
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Alan does a lot of charity work.
27
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Oh, that's how you got your job.
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Oh, Buddy look what you did.
29
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what?
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You made Mel punch my papers.
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So?
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So now I got two dozen carbon copies of Mel's fist.
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Mel, can you help us out do you think?
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Well, I don't know.
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I'll do my best.
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Why prison costumes?
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Well, we kind of thought it would be appropriate
since we're doing a show in prison.
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You're doing a show in prison?
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Yeah, how about that?
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Hundreds of men, and not one of them can get away.
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Mel, while we're up there, maybe we
can get your hair out of solitary.
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Rob.
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It's true Mel.
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The entertainment director of Granville State Prison
asked us to come up there and do a show for the men.
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ROB PETRIE:
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Well, I think it's nice that you're doing it for them.
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Can I go along?
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Why give with one hand and take with the other?
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Rob, are you sure you want to use prison
costumes in a prison-- in a prison sketch?
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I mean, isn't that a little indelicate?
56
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No, Lyle says they love prison humor.
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- Who's Lyle? - Oh, Lyle Delp.
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He's the entertainment director up there.
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He's an old friend of mine.
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Oh, the social director.
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No, the social outcast.
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You mean he's a convict?
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Boy, if he ain't, he got the
worst case in clothes I ever saw.
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You mean you actually know someone who's in prison?
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Yeah, he's quite an old friend of mine.
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Well, how did you ever get to meet him?
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I Mean, was he an old school chum that went wrong?
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Oh no, just somebody that Laura and I met years ago.
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Hey Rob, you mean to say you never told Mel that story?
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Oh, Mel it's a very funny story.
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Don't tell it to him if it's funny.
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He'll never understand it.
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Rob, how did you meet this individual?
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Well, as a matter of fact, when we
first met the guy he was a hold up man.
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How did you know he was a holdup man?
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He held us up.
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You mean, you actually became
friends with a man who held you up?
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Yeah, we've been writing to him in prison for years.
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Yeah, he's sort of a pen pal.
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Sorry.
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Listen Mel, kidding aside, we got this letter
from him a few days ago and he's real cute.
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He really is.
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And you see that number?
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That's not a zip code, that's him.
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It's a wonderful story Mel, if you've got some time.
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Well, I've got plenty of time.
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My desk is clear.
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So is your head.
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Rob, come on.
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Tell him the story of how you met Lyle Delp.
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Well, it all started about a month before Richie was born.
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It was that long ago.
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And I was so afraid that Laura was going to have the
baby early that every time she had a pain I was
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straight through the ceiling.
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I hardly went so far as to take her
downtown to the doctor's office.
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It was late in the afternoon, and pouring rain.
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It's just silly coming all the way down
here in the rain, and at this hour.
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Honey, it's not silly.
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The book said when the pains got
regular, you got to go see the doctor.
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Yeah, but I don't feel ready.
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I think it's just something I ate.
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It's not something you ate.
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How do you know?
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Because something you ate
wouldn't give you regular pains.
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The last one was about 15 minutes ago.
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The other one should be due any minute.
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Ah!
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There it is, they're getting closer.
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That was my arm, dear.
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You just hit it with the umbrella.
120
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Oh honey, I'm sorry.
121
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- It's all right. - But you know something?
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That shouldn't have hurt that much.
123
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Have you been drinking your milk?
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No.
125
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Yes, it's probably a calcium deficiency in there.
126
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So, let me talk to the doctor about it.
127
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Rob, did you bring my bag of nuts?
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Yeah, they're in your purse.
129
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That's something else I've got to mention.
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You've become a salted nut addict.
131
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I'm not an addict.
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I just have a craving for them, that's all.
133
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Honey, cravings are supposed to
stop after the first three months.
135
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Oh Rob, I just hate to go all the
way up there and bother the doctor.
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Bother?
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Honey, he expects it.
139
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My wife, we're expecting a baby.
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Oh.
141
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Would you let me try that?
142
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No, I'll get it honey.
143
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The darn thing--
There, I got it.
144
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Here we go dear.
145
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Oh, good.
146
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OK.
147
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Oh, shoot!
148
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Excuse me.
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Rob!
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Oh, honey!
151
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Honey, don't panic!
152
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No, honey you-- I'll wait-- you
come-- My wife's on the elevator.
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Fine.
155
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Uh, just where are the stairs?
156
00:05:02,075 --> 00:05:04,811
I've got-- Why don't you
wait till it comes back down?
158
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Oh, that's a good idea.
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She's-- We're expecting a baby, I'm a little nervous.
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She's got a little calcium deficiency in her arm there.
161
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Oh.
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I'm sorry I made you miss the elevator.
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That's OK.
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Oh.
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You go ahead.
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Oh.
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Oh honey, you all right?
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Just fine.
169
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Oh.
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Oh, excuse me.
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Oh.
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Honey, why did you go up like that?
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Why didn't you get on?
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Well, this darn thing wouldn't close.
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You want to press the button darling?
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Oh, yeah.
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What-- Number 5, isn't it?
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Yeah.
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Hold onto your stomach, honey.
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Oh, would you stop?
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I feel fine.
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Why doesn't the door open?
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This is 5, isn't it?
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No, 4 and 1/2.
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Did you press the emergency button by mistake?
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No mistake.
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Oh, what's the matter fella?
188
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Nothing's the matter.
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This is just a simple little stick up.
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Huh?
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You mean a hold up?
192
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Hey, you're kidding!
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Does this look like I'm kidding?
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No, look you-- Hey, hey get
back, back, back, back!
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Don't hurt her.
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Don't get dramatic.
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Nobody is going to get hurt.
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00:06:35,135 --> 00:06:36,569
Oh, Rob I told you we shouldn't have come.
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Honey, don't be afraid.
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I know his kind.
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What do you mean my kind?
203
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What kind of crack is that?
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Well, I didn't mean it like you didn't like it.
205
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I just meant that it's pretty rotten
to hold up an expectant mother.
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Hey, look Dr. Spock,
you weren't my first choice, you know.
209
00:06:51,785 --> 00:06:55,355
Young couples like you aren't exactly the
type that have money, you know what I mean?
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Remember the first couple that went up?
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They're over 50.
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That's where the money is.
214
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Well, why didn't you stick them up then?
215
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Because your umbrella kept me out, that's why!
216
00:07:05,532 --> 00:07:08,735
Hey listen, in my business you just
can't stand around waiting for customers.
218
00:07:08,835 --> 00:07:10,670
Now come on, come on, come on give me your wallet.
219
00:07:10,770 --> 00:07:12,372
- Rob, do what he says. - All right.
220
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Hurry up, hurry up, come on.
221
00:07:13,740 --> 00:07:15,141
You're not going to get away with this.
222
00:07:15,241 --> 00:07:16,242
I'll get away with it.
223
00:07:16,342 --> 00:07:19,979
Huh, what's to get away with?
224
00:07:20,079 --> 00:07:21,080
11 bucks?
225
00:07:21,181 --> 00:07:22,115
That's all there is.
226
00:07:22,215 --> 00:07:23,616
And some change.
227
00:07:23,716 --> 00:07:24,951
Come on lady. Give me yours.
228
00:07:25,051 --> 00:07:25,718
Look, leave her alone.
229
00:07:25,819 --> 00:07:26,586
She hasn't got any money.
230
00:07:26,686 --> 00:07:27,487
Yeah, sure she hasn't.
231
00:07:27,587 --> 00:07:28,621
Come on, hurry up.
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00:07:28,721 --> 00:07:30,790
I'm telling you, she doesn't
get her allowance till tomorrow.
234
00:07:30,890 --> 00:07:31,724
Yeah, what do I care about tomorrow?
235
00:07:31,825 --> 00:07:33,393
Stand back, stand back.
236
00:07:33,493 --> 00:07:34,661
OK.
237
00:07:34,761 --> 00:07:36,396
Let's see what you got here.
238
00:07:36,496 --> 00:07:38,231
Hey, not bad.
239
00:07:38,331 --> 00:07:40,300
Look at this, 40 bucks!
240
00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:42,268
What $40 is that?
241
00:07:42,368 --> 00:07:43,770
It's Millie's.
242
00:07:43,870 --> 00:07:46,206
She asked me to get Jerry's birthday present for her.
243
00:07:46,306 --> 00:07:47,240
Boy, that is unfair!
244
00:07:47,340 --> 00:07:48,641
I mean, Millie isn't even here!
245
00:07:51,344 --> 00:07:52,412
Millie's lucky.
246
00:07:52,512 --> 00:07:54,080
She spared all this terror.
247
00:07:54,180 --> 00:07:55,882
Right Rob!
248
00:07:55,982 --> 00:07:57,717
You call me Rob like we're old friends or something.
249
00:07:57,817 --> 00:07:59,219
OK, OK any way you want it Rob.
250
00:07:59,319 --> 00:08:01,254
Now come on, come on hand over your watches and rings.
251
00:08:01,354 --> 00:08:02,222
Step it up.
252
00:08:02,322 --> 00:08:03,256
Come on, come on, come on.
253
00:08:03,356 --> 00:08:04,424
Boy, you haven't got a chance.
254
00:08:04,524 --> 00:08:05,625
People know this elevator is stopped.
255
00:08:05,725 --> 00:08:07,727
I got all the time I need.
256
00:08:07,827 --> 00:08:12,765
The average person pushes an elevator button six or
seven minutes before realizing it's not working.
259
00:08:12,866 --> 00:08:14,267
I made a study of this thing you know.
260
00:08:14,367 --> 00:08:16,703
You mean, you've held up people in elevators before?
261
00:08:16,803 --> 00:08:19,639
No, I held them up in front of a police station dumdum.
262
00:08:23,776 --> 00:08:25,712
Now, give me your rings.
263
00:08:25,812 --> 00:08:28,515
Oh, but these are our wedding rings.
264
00:08:28,615 --> 00:08:29,883
Come on, give me your rings.
265
00:08:29,983 --> 00:08:30,617
Hey, hey, hey.
266
00:08:30,717 --> 00:08:33,553
Watch it, watch it.
267
00:08:33,653 --> 00:08:35,288
Honey, I'll get you another one.
268
00:08:35,388 --> 00:08:36,222
I promise.
269
00:08:36,322 --> 00:08:38,324
I can't get it off.
270
00:08:38,424 --> 00:08:39,492
Oh, it's stuck on there.
271
00:08:39,592 --> 00:08:40,827
Her finger's are a little swollen.
272
00:08:40,927 --> 00:08:44,464
My luck, I got to stick up a fat lady.
273
00:08:44,564 --> 00:08:47,467
Look, you probably don't believe
me, but I really can't get it off.
275
00:08:47,567 --> 00:08:48,601
I believe you, I believe you.
276
00:08:48,701 --> 00:08:49,869
My mother had eight kids.
277
00:08:49,969 --> 00:08:51,704
Tell her to lay off the salt!
278
00:08:55,041 --> 00:08:57,410
Her feet are a little bit swollen too.
279
00:08:57,510 --> 00:08:59,512
I don't want her shoes.
280
00:08:59,612 --> 00:09:00,947
Give me yours! Hurry up, come on.
281
00:09:01,047 --> 00:09:01,714
My shoes?
282
00:09:01,814 --> 00:09:03,216
No, your ring, your ring!
283
00:09:03,316 --> 00:09:05,118
Boy, I'll remember you.
284
00:09:05,218 --> 00:09:05,919
Wonderful.
285
00:09:06,019 --> 00:09:07,854
That's a big thrill for me.
286
00:09:07,954 --> 00:09:09,522
Hey, hey, hey don't get frisky!
287
00:09:09,622 --> 00:09:13,126
[inaudible] Don't get frisky buddy.
288
00:09:13,226 --> 00:09:15,061
Hey, is this real gold?
289
00:09:15,161 --> 00:09:17,830
To one love.
290
00:09:17,931 --> 00:09:20,366
Hey, that's beautiful.
291
00:09:20,466 --> 00:09:22,001
We think it's beautiful.
292
00:09:22,101 --> 00:09:23,236
I think so too.
293
00:09:23,336 --> 00:09:24,504
You don't think I spend all my time in an elevator.
294
00:09:24,604 --> 00:09:25,805
I lead a life too you know.
295
00:09:25,905 --> 00:09:27,106
Oh, I'll bet you do.
296
00:09:27,206 --> 00:09:27,907
Yeah.
297
00:09:28,007 --> 00:09:29,242
I had a girl once you know.
298
00:09:29,342 --> 00:09:31,511
Made me an ID bracelet while she was in prison.
299
00:09:31,611 --> 00:09:32,445
You know what it said?
300
00:09:32,545 --> 00:09:33,413
Wish you were here.
301
00:09:33,513 --> 00:09:36,382
Ah, smart guy.
302
00:09:36,482 --> 00:09:37,884
Oh boy.
303
00:09:37,984 --> 00:09:39,419
Watch that, watch that lady!
304
00:09:39,519 --> 00:09:40,353
That was another one.
305
00:09:40,453 --> 00:09:41,521
Another one honey?
306
00:09:41,621 --> 00:09:43,723
Look you-- OK,
OK don't get excited!
307
00:09:43,823 --> 00:09:44,991
I'll get you out of here.
308
00:09:45,091 --> 00:09:47,794
And listen lady, I'll press the button,
we'll go right to the roof, you hear?
310
00:09:47,894 --> 00:09:49,195
And then we'll come right back down.
311
00:09:49,295 --> 00:09:51,197
And just hold on.
312
00:09:51,297 --> 00:09:52,198
Nothing happened.
313
00:09:54,300 --> 00:09:55,134
We're not moving.
314
00:09:55,234 --> 00:09:56,002
The elevator's stuck.
315
00:09:56,102 --> 00:10:00,940
Back-- Hey, we can't be stuck.
316
00:10:01,040 --> 00:10:05,144
I got to get out of here.
317
00:10:05,244 --> 00:10:07,113
[music playing]
318
00:10:07,213 --> 00:10:09,515
Hey, we're stuck!
319
00:10:09,616 --> 00:10:11,117
We're stuck down here.
320
00:10:12,217 --> 00:10:13,352
Go ahead, go ahead!
321
00:10:13,452 --> 00:10:16,521
You're stuck in an elevator, and with a hold
up man, and Laura's about to give birth.
323
00:10:16,622 --> 00:10:18,123
What happened? - Nothing happened.
324
00:10:18,223 --> 00:10:19,391
They're still stuck!
325
00:10:19,491 --> 00:10:21,093
The kid was born in the elevator and he named him Otis.
326
00:10:24,830 --> 00:10:26,198
Oh my gosh, it's 3 o'clock.
327
00:10:26,298 --> 00:10:28,233
I promised to check the sketch in the rehearsal hall.
328
00:10:28,333 --> 00:10:29,835
No, wait a minute, don't leave me hanging.
329
00:10:29,935 --> 00:10:32,404
That's the best way to leave him.
330
00:10:32,504 --> 00:10:33,572
Hey!
331
00:10:33,672 --> 00:10:35,340
- Thank you. - Welcome.
332
00:10:35,440 --> 00:10:36,842
Go on Rob, finish the story.
333
00:10:36,942 --> 00:10:40,078
Well, anyway there we were banging and yelling away.
334
00:10:40,178 --> 00:10:44,249
All the elevators in town, I got to get a looser.
335
00:10:44,349 --> 00:10:45,651
Honey, you feel all right?
336
00:10:45,751 --> 00:10:47,152
Yeah, I think so.
337
00:10:47,252 --> 00:10:49,287
I'll push the emergency button again.
338
00:10:49,388 --> 00:10:50,455
What do you think I'm doing?
339
00:10:50,555 --> 00:10:51,690
Plugging a dike?
340
00:10:54,426 --> 00:10:58,797
Hey lady, sit down, It's no good for you to be standing.
341
00:10:58,897 --> 00:11:00,265
We don't need any advice from you.
342
00:11:00,365 --> 00:11:01,366
You got us into this mess.
343
00:11:01,466 --> 00:11:03,735
And if anything happens to her--
Hey, is it my fault?
345
00:11:03,835 --> 00:11:05,137
My fault the elevator broke down?
346
00:11:05,237 --> 00:11:07,039
I don't want to harm you, I just want to rob you!
347
00:11:07,139 --> 00:11:07,973
Well, you did.
348
00:11:08,073 --> 00:11:10,342
So we don't need any of your ideas!
349
00:11:10,442 --> 00:11:11,710
Honey, you should sit down.
350
00:11:11,810 --> 00:11:13,445
I'd love to, my feet are killing me.
351
00:11:13,545 --> 00:11:19,251
Sit-- Sit on-- What happened to elevators that have
those stools that fold down and people to run them?
354
00:11:19,351 --> 00:11:22,487
What happened to elevators that go up and down?
355
00:11:22,587 --> 00:11:24,189
Honey, look, sit on my coat.
356
00:11:24,289 --> 00:11:25,824
Than you dear.
357
00:11:28,493 --> 00:11:30,762
We'll be out of here in no time.
358
00:11:30,862 --> 00:11:33,632
Oh, I feel just like an old cow.
359
00:11:33,732 --> 00:11:36,768
Honey, you look beautiful.
360
00:11:36,868 --> 00:11:39,104
Capacity 2,000 pounds.
361
00:11:39,204 --> 00:11:50,215
Inspected 1954, Sidney Burns, 1955 Sidney Burns,
1956 Sidney Burns, 1957 Wendell Henderson.
363
00:11:50,315 --> 00:11:51,917
They should have stuck with Sidney.
364
00:11:54,619 --> 00:11:56,455
Let me see that thing.
365
00:11:56,555 --> 00:11:57,556
Yeah, just as I thought.
366
00:11:57,656 --> 00:12:00,725
In an emergency, call MU8-8599.
367
00:12:00,826 --> 00:12:03,328
And where am I going to call?
368
00:12:03,428 --> 00:12:04,763
I'm going to call then when I get home!
369
00:12:04,863 --> 00:12:07,766
Yeah, give them a zing for me too.
370
00:12:07,866 --> 00:12:09,000
Hey, hey lady.
371
00:12:09,101 --> 00:12:10,735
You don't look very comfortable lady.
372
00:12:10,836 --> 00:12:11,770
Take my coat.
373
00:12:11,870 --> 00:12:13,505
No thank you, I don't need it.
374
00:12:13,605 --> 00:12:14,506
Go ahead and take it honey.
375
00:12:14,606 --> 00:12:15,574
No, I really don't need it.
376
00:12:15,674 --> 00:12:16,575
Yes you do need it.
377
00:12:16,675 --> 00:12:17,676
The softer the better honey.
378
00:12:17,776 --> 00:12:19,144
Yeah.
379
00:12:19,244 --> 00:12:22,314
Here now, let's just put it behind you.
380
00:12:22,414 --> 00:12:23,315
What?
381
00:12:27,652 --> 00:12:29,488
What are you--
What are you doing?
382
00:12:29,588 --> 00:12:30,989
I'm covering you with a comb.
383
00:12:31,089 --> 00:12:34,493
You held me up with a comb!
384
00:12:34,593 --> 00:12:35,961
That's why you wanted my coat!
385
00:12:36,061 --> 00:12:37,762
You wanted my comb!
386
00:12:37,863 --> 00:12:39,364
And I was concerned about her!
387
00:12:39,464 --> 00:12:40,398
Oh, Rob!
388
00:12:47,105 --> 00:12:49,574
You mean that you held us up at comb point?
389
00:12:49,674 --> 00:12:51,276
Of course, I never carry a gun.
390
00:12:51,376 --> 00:12:52,210
You get in trouble.
391
00:12:52,310 --> 00:12:56,882
Borrowed one from my brother
once and I almost killed myself.
393
00:12:56,982 --> 00:12:58,917
Look at my big plan and I get a comb.
394
00:12:59,017 --> 00:13:00,152
Look at this human nature.
395
00:13:00,252 --> 00:13:03,054
He's upset because I didn't use a gun.
396
00:13:03,155 --> 00:13:05,090
You don't even need a comb!
397
00:13:05,190 --> 00:13:07,259
You sure know how to hurt a guy Rob.
398
00:13:10,428 --> 00:13:11,463
You know something?
399
00:13:11,563 --> 00:13:12,898
There's a lot of things you do that upset me.
400
00:13:12,998 --> 00:13:15,500
And now that I know you're not armed, I'm
going to turn you in when we get downstairs!
402
00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:16,468
Rob, look up there.
403
00:13:16,568 --> 00:13:17,402
What?
404
00:13:17,502 --> 00:13:18,637
Is it a trick?
405
00:13:18,737 --> 00:13:20,105
Rob, I told you.
406
00:13:20,205 --> 00:13:20,939
Oh.
407
00:13:21,039 --> 00:13:22,841
In the ceiling, a trap door.
408
00:13:22,941 --> 00:13:24,943
Yeah, yeah a trap door.
409
00:13:25,043 --> 00:13:25,877
Of course a trap door.
410
00:13:25,977 --> 00:13:27,779
Boost me up there.
411
00:13:27,879 --> 00:13:29,714
Hey, wait a minute.
412
00:13:29,814 --> 00:13:32,751
You stay here with the wife, I'll go.
413
00:13:32,851 --> 00:13:34,052
Oh, no you don't.
414
00:13:34,152 --> 00:13:35,820
You go up there, we'll never see you again.
415
00:13:35,921 --> 00:13:37,322
Boy oh boy.
416
00:13:37,422 --> 00:13:39,357
Do you think I'd leave an expectant mother stuck here?
417
00:13:39,457 --> 00:13:41,593
What do you think I am?
418
00:13:41,693 --> 00:13:42,894
You know what you are.
419
00:13:42,994 --> 00:13:43,962
Oh yeah, I know what you're going to say.
420
00:13:44,062 --> 00:13:44,963
Sure, I'm a crook.
421
00:13:45,063 --> 00:13:46,498
Does that make me inhumane?
422
00:13:46,598 --> 00:13:48,099
I have feelings too!
423
00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:50,068
Just because I life a few bucks from somebody doesn't mean I'm
424
00:13:50,168 --> 00:13:52,804
going to leave a fat lady stuck here, does it?
425
00:13:52,904 --> 00:13:54,806
There's a difference you know!
426
00:13:54,906 --> 00:13:56,007
All right, I guess there is.
427
00:13:56,107 --> 00:13:58,076
All right, OK, and lay off!
428
00:14:01,713 --> 00:14:04,049
People driving me crazy.
429
00:14:04,149 --> 00:14:07,886
Hey, you go climb up.
430
00:14:07,986 --> 00:14:10,689
But, you just said-- I know,
I know what I just said.
432
00:14:10,789 --> 00:14:13,391
Go ahead up, you be the hero.
433
00:14:13,491 --> 00:14:15,460
All right honey, I'll be right back.
434
00:14:15,560 --> 00:14:16,361
You feeling all right?
435
00:14:16,461 --> 00:14:17,295
Yeah.
436
00:14:17,395 --> 00:14:18,296
Rob, just fine.
437
00:14:18,396 --> 00:14:19,931
But, I wish you wouldn't go up there.
438
00:14:20,031 --> 00:14:21,967
Well honey, what could happen in an elevator shaft?
439
00:14:22,067 --> 00:14:23,635
I'll be careful.
440
00:14:23,735 --> 00:14:28,773
John, maybe Mr.-- Mr.--
What'd you say your name was?
442
00:14:28,873 --> 00:14:31,877
Delp, Lyle Delp.
443
00:14:31,977 --> 00:14:33,578
Lyle Delp?
444
00:14:33,678 --> 00:14:34,746
Yeah.
445
00:14:34,846 --> 00:14:36,882
Lyle Francis Delp.
446
00:14:36,982 --> 00:14:40,118
You want to make something out of it?
447
00:14:40,218 --> 00:14:42,387
Darling, maybe Mr. Delp should go up.
448
00:14:42,487 --> 00:14:44,456
Honey, I'll be careful.
449
00:14:44,556 --> 00:14:45,824
All right, come on.
450
00:14:45,924 --> 00:14:48,360
Wait a minute, I got to get the trap door out of the way.
451
00:14:48,460 --> 00:14:51,229
OK, come on.
452
00:14:51,329 --> 00:14:52,397
OK.
453
00:14:52,497 --> 00:14:53,531
All right, on three.
454
00:14:53,632 --> 00:14:56,468
OK, 1, 2, 3.
455
00:14:58,803 --> 00:14:59,938
I made it.
456
00:15:11,916 --> 00:15:13,685
There it is.
457
00:15:13,785 --> 00:15:15,520
A stuck elevator.
458
00:15:20,091 --> 00:15:20,925
LAURA PETRIE: What was that?
459
00:15:21,026 --> 00:15:23,061
Uh-- LAURA PETRIE:
Rob, are you all right?
460
00:15:23,161 --> 00:15:24,029
Oh, nothing honey.
461
00:15:24,129 --> 00:15:25,330
I just kicked a beer can.
462
00:15:25,430 --> 00:15:27,465
Look at this bullet they gave us.
463
00:15:27,565 --> 00:15:29,100
Can you reach the door?
464
00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:31,536
Uh, not quite I don't think.
465
00:15:31,636 --> 00:15:32,537
Whoa!
466
00:15:35,840 --> 00:15:38,543
Can you see anything?
467
00:15:38,643 --> 00:15:40,645
Let's see.
468
00:15:40,745 --> 00:15:44,049
Fred loves Vivian.
469
00:15:44,149 --> 00:15:45,817
That's nothing.
470
00:15:45,917 --> 00:15:49,888
In 1936 John Freeney laid these bricks.
471
00:15:49,988 --> 00:15:53,625
I want to wish you lots of luck because
if you're reading this, you're stuck.
473
00:15:53,725 --> 00:15:56,861
[inaudible]
474
00:15:56,961 --> 00:15:58,663
Oh, a riot.
475
00:15:58,763 --> 00:16:01,599
Anything else up there?
476
00:16:01,700 --> 00:16:03,668
Fred is a-- LAURA PETRIE: What?
477
00:16:03,768 --> 00:16:04,703
Nothing honey.
478
00:16:09,040 --> 00:16:15,013
Here's something, danger, high voltage.
479
00:16:15,113 --> 00:16:16,648
Rob, maybe you ought to come back down.
480
00:16:19,851 --> 00:16:22,253
Hello, is anybody there?
481
00:16:22,354 --> 00:16:23,421
Yeah! We're stuck!
482
00:16:23,521 --> 00:16:24,723
Hey, we're here! We're here!
483
00:16:27,826 --> 00:16:29,561
Laura, that's me.
484
00:16:29,661 --> 00:16:32,497
Oh.
485
00:16:32,597 --> 00:16:34,265
Hey listen, throw me up the umbrella.
486
00:16:34,366 --> 00:16:34,999
Why?
487
00:16:35,100 --> 00:16:36,334
Is it raining up there?
488
00:16:40,839 --> 00:16:41,773
Thanks.
489
00:16:53,051 --> 00:16:54,586
Anybody got any chewing gum?
490
00:16:54,686 --> 00:16:56,788
Yeah, yeah gum.
491
00:16:56,888 --> 00:16:58,523
Here, here coming up!
492
00:16:58,623 --> 00:16:59,524
Thanks.
493
00:17:03,695 --> 00:17:05,563
LAURA PETRIE: What do you need the gum for?
494
00:17:05,663 --> 00:17:06,765
To chew honey.
495
00:17:12,837 --> 00:17:14,873
Hello.
496
00:17:14,973 --> 00:17:16,441
LAURA PETRIE: What is it?
497
00:17:16,541 --> 00:17:19,110
That skylight in the roof is wide open.
498
00:17:19,210 --> 00:17:20,879
LAURA PETRIE: Well, how far up is it?
499
00:17:20,979 --> 00:17:24,449
About 40 floors.
500
00:17:24,549 --> 00:17:25,483
Oh, don't Rob.
501
00:17:25,583 --> 00:17:26,217
Don't.
502
00:17:26,317 --> 00:17:27,919
I'm not going to honey.
503
00:17:28,019 --> 00:17:29,854
Can you climb down?
504
00:17:29,954 --> 00:17:31,856
Let's see.
505
00:17:31,956 --> 00:17:33,091
Not alive.
506
00:17:35,326 --> 00:17:39,531
I think I can climb up to this fifth
floor door and maybe get it open.
508
00:17:39,631 --> 00:17:41,833
LAURA PETRIE: Don't hurt yourself.
509
00:17:41,933 --> 00:17:43,401
But get us out of here!
510
00:17:43,501 --> 00:17:45,637
Boy, this thing's slippery and greasy.
511
00:17:57,248 --> 00:17:58,416
What was that?
512
00:17:58,516 --> 00:17:59,484
Nothing.
513
00:17:59,584 --> 00:18:02,554
Just some stuff dropped out of my pocket.
514
00:18:02,654 --> 00:18:06,324
Hey, hey I can't see him anymore.
515
00:18:09,093 --> 00:18:10,395
LAURA PETRIE: Rob!
516
00:18:10,495 --> 00:18:14,065
[inaudible] honey, I just lost the car keys.
517
00:18:14,165 --> 00:18:15,033
What do you need car keys!
518
00:18:15,133 --> 00:18:16,334
We're in an elevator!
519
00:18:16,434 --> 00:18:19,938
I have an extra set darling.
520
00:18:20,038 --> 00:18:21,773
She has an extra set darling.
521
00:18:25,410 --> 00:18:26,244
Well, here they are.
522
00:18:26,344 --> 00:18:27,178
I found them, it's OK.
523
00:18:27,278 --> 00:18:29,013
It's O-- Oh.
524
00:18:29,113 --> 00:18:31,916
It's OK, he found them.
525
00:18:32,016 --> 00:18:34,085
Rob, be careful.
526
00:18:34,185 --> 00:18:35,487
I will.
527
00:18:35,587 --> 00:18:40,859
Listen, I want to try to pry open that
fifth floor door with the umbrella.
529
00:18:40,959 --> 00:18:47,465
I can't-- Ah.
530
00:18:52,604 --> 00:18:53,505
Whoa.
531
00:18:58,776 --> 00:18:59,744
I'm coming down.
532
00:19:04,382 --> 00:19:05,183
Careful darling.
533
00:19:05,283 --> 00:19:06,117
Come on, I got you.
534
00:19:06,217 --> 00:19:07,352
I got you.
535
00:19:09,888 --> 00:19:10,922
There's no use.
536
00:19:11,022 --> 00:19:12,290
There's no way out up there at all.
537
00:19:12,390 --> 00:19:14,058
Look, somebody is bound to discover us.
538
00:19:14,158 --> 00:19:16,027
The best thing to do is just wait.
539
00:19:16,127 --> 00:19:17,095
Yeah.
540
00:19:17,195 --> 00:19:18,363
Might as well sit around here.
541
00:19:18,463 --> 00:19:19,964
It's better than sitting in jail.
542
00:19:20,064 --> 00:19:23,301
Oh, Mr. Delp you're not sure what's going to happen to you.
543
00:19:23,401 --> 00:19:25,270
Oh, it's jail, it's jail.
544
00:19:25,370 --> 00:19:26,871
This isn't my first rap.
545
00:19:26,971 --> 00:19:28,973
MAN: Hey anybody down there?
546
00:19:29,073 --> 00:19:29,874
Yeah!
547
00:19:29,974 --> 00:19:30,808
We're here!
548
00:19:30,909 --> 00:19:31,910
We're down here!
549
00:19:32,010 --> 00:19:33,111
MAN: Are you all right?
550
00:19:33,211 --> 00:19:34,546
Yeah, I guess so!
551
00:19:34,646 --> 00:19:36,948
MAN: We think the generator went out or something.
552
00:19:37,048 --> 00:19:38,216
Just sit tight.
553
00:19:38,316 --> 00:19:40,185
The repair man is on the way!
554
00:19:40,285 --> 00:19:41,452
Well listen, hurry it up.
555
00:19:41,553 --> 00:19:43,121
We've got an expectant mother down here.
556
00:19:43,221 --> 00:19:46,391
MAN: OK, we'll call the police emergency squad.
557
00:19:46,491 --> 00:19:48,993
The fire emergency squad!
558
00:19:49,093 --> 00:19:52,864
For everybody else they call the fire
department, for me they call the cops.
560
00:19:52,964 --> 00:19:55,767
I'm a loser.
561
00:19:55,867 --> 00:19:57,802
[music playing]
562
00:19:58,670 --> 00:20:01,005
Boy, these nuts make me thirsty.
563
00:20:01,105 --> 00:20:02,740
MAN: Won't be long now, folks!
564
00:20:02,840 --> 00:20:08,746
The generator is working, but some jerk threw an
umbrella down the shaft and shorted the main switch!
566
00:20:12,116 --> 00:20:14,986
Hang on!
567
00:20:15,086 --> 00:20:16,487
How you feel honey?
568
00:20:16,588 --> 00:20:18,623
I'm all right, just little tired.
569
00:20:18,723 --> 00:20:20,592
When was the last time you felt anything?
570
00:20:20,692 --> 00:20:22,860
Oh, they stopped a long time ago.
571
00:20:22,961 --> 00:20:28,066
Gee, must be-- You
still have our watches.
572
00:20:28,166 --> 00:20:32,337
Oh, yeah.
573
00:20:32,437 --> 00:20:34,539
Where I'm going I won't need them.
574
00:20:38,743 --> 00:20:40,612
Thanks Lyle.
575
00:20:40,712 --> 00:20:46,651
Hey Lyle, I hate to
mention it but-- Oh, yeah.
577
00:20:49,153 --> 00:20:51,189
51 bucks, count it.
578
00:20:51,289 --> 00:20:53,958
I don't have to count it.
579
00:20:54,058 --> 00:20:54,993
More nuts?
580
00:20:55,093 --> 00:20:57,195
Yeah, I'm dying I'm so hungry.
581
00:20:57,295 --> 00:20:58,396
How about you Lyle?
582
00:20:58,496 --> 00:20:59,397
Are there any Brazilian ones?
583
00:20:59,497 --> 00:21:01,933
They're not as salty you know.
584
00:21:02,033 --> 00:21:03,401
Sorry, I ate all of them.
585
00:21:03,501 --> 00:21:05,136
I think the only thing we have left are the peanuts.
586
00:21:05,236 --> 00:21:08,640
Story of my life, the leftovers.
587
00:21:08,740 --> 00:21:16,281
Ever since I was a kid, leftover food,
leftover clothing, leftover dreams.
589
00:21:16,381 --> 00:21:19,417
Didn't I hear that on Dragnet last night?
590
00:21:19,517 --> 00:21:23,388
Yeah, I identified with him.
591
00:21:23,488 --> 00:21:25,089
You identified with him?
592
00:21:25,189 --> 00:21:26,591
Yeah.
593
00:21:26,691 --> 00:21:29,694
We're both social misfits.
594
00:21:29,794 --> 00:21:33,498
I couldn't get a wife, couldn't get a job.
595
00:21:33,598 --> 00:21:36,267
Haven't you ever had a steady job?
596
00:21:36,367 --> 00:21:37,802
Never.
597
00:21:37,902 --> 00:21:40,004
Well, I don't think that's anything to brag about Lyle.
598
00:21:40,104 --> 00:21:41,072
Who's bragging?
599
00:21:41,172 --> 00:21:42,573
What's to brag about?
600
00:21:42,674 --> 00:21:46,711
Those doors slide open, I walk into the arms of a cop.
601
00:21:46,811 --> 00:21:51,449
You know, I once saw a movie where the crook
got away by switching jackets with another man
603
00:21:51,549 --> 00:21:53,017
and then ducking down low.
604
00:21:53,117 --> 00:21:56,154
Laura!
605
00:21:56,254 --> 00:21:57,188
That's all right Laura.
606
00:21:57,288 --> 00:21:58,623
Thanks anyway.
607
00:21:58,723 --> 00:22:01,359
Oh Rob, do we have to turn him in?
608
00:22:01,459 --> 00:22:02,727
I don't know honey.
609
00:22:05,196 --> 00:22:07,398
Hey, we're moving.
610
00:22:07,498 --> 00:22:12,303
Lyle, it isn't that we want to turn you in.
611
00:22:12,403 --> 00:22:14,839
You don't have to turn me in.
612
00:22:14,939 --> 00:22:16,407
What do you mean?
613
00:22:16,507 --> 00:22:18,042
I'm going to save you the trouble.
614
00:22:18,142 --> 00:22:19,877
Lyle you'd do that?
615
00:22:19,977 --> 00:22:20,978
That's right.
616
00:22:21,079 --> 00:22:24,182
Because you're nice people, and I like you.
617
00:22:24,282 --> 00:22:25,616
You hear that honey?
618
00:22:25,717 --> 00:22:29,887
Lyle, you know what you're about to do
is the first step on that long road back.
620
00:22:29,987 --> 00:22:31,389
To a better life.
621
00:22:31,489 --> 00:22:33,458
I know, I know.
622
00:22:33,558 --> 00:22:35,693
That's why I'm going to do it.
623
00:22:35,793 --> 00:22:41,999
Every man has to do something for
himself if he's ever to be free.
625
00:22:42,100 --> 00:22:43,067
Good luck to you Lyle.
626
00:22:47,038 --> 00:22:49,373
I'll need it.
627
00:22:49,474 --> 00:22:50,608
Thanks Rob.
628
00:22:54,379 --> 00:22:56,681
[music playing]
629
00:22:56,781 --> 00:23:01,352
Man must do some things for
himself if he's ever to be free.
631
00:23:01,452 --> 00:23:02,253
That's beautiful.
632
00:23:02,353 --> 00:23:03,821
Isn't it?
633
00:23:03,921 --> 00:23:05,590
And then when the elevator stopped, he turned himself in.
634
00:23:05,690 --> 00:23:08,760
No, he ran like a thief.
635
00:23:08,860 --> 00:23:09,827
Let's cast him.
636
00:23:09,927 --> 00:23:12,363
You mean-- You mean he
didn't turn himself in?
638
00:23:12,463 --> 00:23:13,831
No, he tried to turn us in.
639
00:23:13,931 --> 00:23:16,067
He told them that we tried to hold him up.
640
00:23:16,167 --> 00:23:17,535
And he ran in the confusion.
641
00:23:17,635 --> 00:23:21,706
Yeah, you see, and he'd have made it too
if he didn't stop to get a drink of water.
643
00:23:21,806 --> 00:23:24,842
The police looked at Laura and decided
she wasn't shaped like a holdup man.
645
00:23:24,942 --> 00:23:26,110
They caught him on down the hall.
646
00:23:26,210 --> 00:23:27,445
We had to identify him.
647
00:23:27,545 --> 00:23:28,746
And he doesn't hold a grudge?
648
00:23:28,846 --> 00:23:29,847
No.
649
00:23:29,947 --> 00:23:31,516
Even though he's been in for eight years?
650
00:23:31,616 --> 00:23:35,153
Well look Mel, during that time he's
been in and out, and in and out.
652
00:23:35,253 --> 00:23:36,487
You know.
653
00:23:36,587 --> 00:23:38,523
He's got the only cell with a swinging door.
654
00:23:38,623 --> 00:23:40,224
He's working in the library in the prison now.
655
00:23:40,324 --> 00:23:41,526
He's a trustee. - What do you say Mel?
656
00:23:41,626 --> 00:23:43,494
Is the story worth a few costumes?
657
00:23:43,594 --> 00:23:45,530
I will give you anything you need.
658
00:23:45,630 --> 00:23:47,832
We must do more to help our men behind bars.
659
00:23:47,932 --> 00:23:52,170
Yeah, let's put him in front of
the bar and give him some booze.
661
00:23:52,270 --> 00:23:53,437
I appreciate all the help Mel.
662
00:23:53,538 --> 00:23:54,872
We would like to give them a good show.
663
00:23:54,972 --> 00:23:59,277
Sociologists tell us that anybody is
potentially capable of committing a crime.
665
00:23:59,377 --> 00:24:00,578
Any one of us.
666
00:24:00,678 --> 00:24:02,914
Well, I don't think you ever have
to worry about being a Lyle Delp.
668
00:24:03,014 --> 00:24:04,048
Why not?
669
00:24:04,148 --> 00:24:05,550
Well, for one thing, you haven't got a comb.
670
00:24:13,891 --> 00:24:17,461
Next week by popular request,
the whole cast is going to prison.
672
00:24:17,562 --> 00:24:20,264
Join us, won't you?
673
00:24:20,364 --> 00:24:24,168
[music playing]
43140
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