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1
00:00:00,453 --> 00:00:03,373
Oh, that so good.
2
00:00:03,383 --> 00:00:04,903
My back feels like jelly.
3
00:00:05,813 --> 00:00:07,633
Kinda looks like jelly too.
4
00:00:07,643 --> 00:00:10,263
We can't keep too much
chocolate around the house.
5
00:00:10,273 --> 00:00:11,793
Oh, what can I say honey.
6
00:00:11,803 --> 00:00:13,323
I had a great Halloween.
7
00:00:14,333 --> 00:00:16,253
Something not said by most adults.
8
00:00:16,963 --> 00:00:17,783
Okay.
9
00:00:17,793 --> 00:00:19,293
You're half hour's up.
time to switch.
10
00:00:21,143 --> 00:00:23,243
My shoulders have
been so tight.lately.
11
00:00:27,025 --> 00:00:29,527
Oh, that feels so good.
12
00:00:31,059 --> 00:00:33,260
No, wait. What are you doing?
13
00:00:33,261 --> 00:00:35,229
I think you know.
14
00:00:35,230 --> 00:00:38,399
No, don't stop the massage.
15
00:00:41,870 --> 00:00:44,372
Adam, I'm not holding
any tension in those.
16
00:00:44,373 --> 00:00:46,140
Oh!
17
00:00:46,141 --> 00:00:48,743
Ten seconds that massage lasted
18
00:00:48,744 --> 00:00:51,045
bere he started wildly humping me.
19
00:00:51,046 --> 00:00:54,081
You got a whole ten seconds?
20
00:00:54,082 --> 00:00:55,750
What do you mean?
21
00:00:55,751 --> 00:00:57,718
I mean, every man turns
a massage into sex
22
00:00:57,719 --> 00:01:00,921
as fast as they can.
23
00:01:00,922 --> 00:01:03,457
Some of Jeff's burps last longer.
24
00:01:03,458 --> 00:01:05,993
Longer than his massages or sex?
25
00:01:05,994 --> 00:01:08,429
Yes.
26
00:01:08,430 --> 00:01:10,464
Well, I'm not buying it.
27
00:01:10,465 --> 00:01:12,133
I refuse to accept
that a woman can't get
28
00:01:12,134 --> 00:01:13,968
a simple back rub from
the man that she loves.
29
00:01:13,969 --> 00:01:15,036
Uh-huh.
30
00:01:15,037 --> 00:01:16,203
Hey. Doreen. Hmm.
31
00:01:16,204 --> 00:01:17,605
Your husband ever
give you a massage?
32
00:01:17,606 --> 00:01:18,739
Sure.
33
00:01:18,740 --> 00:01:20,908
How do you think I got four kids?
34
00:01:22,911 --> 00:01:28,883
♪ How many ways to say I love you ♪
35
00:01:28,884 --> 00:01:33,421
♪ how many ways to say
that I'm not scared ♪
36
00:01:33,422 --> 00:01:35,990
♪ with you by my side ♪
37
00:01:35,991 --> 00:01:38,459
♪ there is no denying ♪
38
00:01:38,460 --> 00:01:41,131
♪ I can't wait for me and you ♪
39
00:01:41,141 --> 00:01:44,141
40
00:01:44,151 --> 00:01:49,051
41
00:01:54,678 --> 00:01:56,079
Hey.
42
00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:57,817
Uh, Russell's not here.
43
00:01:59,052 --> 00:02:02,989
He should be any minute.
44
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:06,074
Subtitles downloaded from www.OpenSubtitles.org
45
00:02:14,270 --> 00:02:15,470
What's your deal?
46
00:02:15,471 --> 00:02:19,407
Um...
47
00:02:19,408 --> 00:02:21,476
How--how do you mean?
48
00:02:21,477 --> 00:02:22,544
I don't know,
49
00:02:22,545 --> 00:02:26,781
you talk one way but
you look another, so...
50
00:02:26,782 --> 00:02:30,652
I don't know what's going on.
51
00:02:30,653 --> 00:02:34,889
Mr. Dunbar, over here,
please hurry.
52
00:02:34,890 --> 00:02:37,759
What's going on there, c-3po?
53
00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:40,628
Chewbacca.
54
00:02:40,629 --> 00:02:41,796
What's this?
55
00:02:41,797 --> 00:02:42,964
Oh.
56
00:02:42,965 --> 00:02:45,533
This is a cricket video
game my cousin sent me
57
00:02:45,534 --> 00:02:47,268
from South Africa.
58
00:02:47,269 --> 00:02:49,370
Why, is it not legal in the U.S.?
59
00:02:49,371 --> 00:02:52,807
You gotta get it
on the geek market?
60
00:02:52,808 --> 00:02:53,942
Nothing geeky about it.
61
00:02:53,943 --> 00:02:56,110
Cricket is a tremendously
exciting sport.
62
00:02:56,111 --> 00:02:57,345
Sport?
63
00:02:57,346 --> 00:02:58,446
Is it that game that they play
64
00:02:58,447 --> 00:03:01,082
in all those Harry Potter books?
65
00:03:01,083 --> 00:03:02,717
No, actually, that's Quidditch
66
00:03:02,718 --> 00:03:05,119
and you can only play it if
you're a witch or a wizard.
67
00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:06,287
And it wasn't in all the books.
68
00:03:06,288 --> 00:03:10,858
It wasn't in the
seventh one at all.
69
00:03:10,859 --> 00:03:12,860
And I'm the geek.
70
00:03:12,861 --> 00:03:14,462
I'll have you know,
71
00:03:14,463 --> 00:03:16,731
cricket is among the most
popular sports in the world.
72
00:03:16,732 --> 00:03:21,402
The guy on the box
is wearing a sweater.
73
00:03:21,403 --> 00:03:22,604
Oh, mommy, I'm playing cricket
74
00:03:22,605 --> 00:03:25,073
and it's ever so chilly.
75
00:03:25,074 --> 00:03:26,941
Well.
76
00:03:26,942 --> 00:03:30,345
I see the ugly American
has weighed in.
77
00:03:30,346 --> 00:03:31,512
At about 20 pounds more than
78
00:03:31,513 --> 00:03:34,749
most doctors would recommend.
79
00:03:34,750 --> 00:03:36,918
Kaboom.
80
00:03:36,919 --> 00:03:38,953
I'm sorry that we can't all have
81
00:03:38,954 --> 00:03:42,156
that ropey, underfed look.
82
00:03:42,157 --> 00:03:43,925
A dunk.
83
00:03:43,926 --> 00:03:45,259
Now look, there's a warning.
84
00:03:45,260 --> 00:03:49,764
Not suitable for anyone
who wants to get laid.
85
00:03:49,765 --> 00:03:54,135
Windmill jam.
86
00:03:55,504 --> 00:03:57,372
So typical.
87
00:03:57,373 --> 00:04:01,876
You can't do it, so you mock it.
88
00:04:01,877 --> 00:04:03,578
Oh, I could do it.
89
00:04:03,579 --> 00:04:05,446
Hmm.
90
00:04:05,447 --> 00:04:08,383
Well, then, why don't
you come on over...
91
00:04:08,384 --> 00:04:10,818
And we'll play?
92
00:04:10,819 --> 00:04:13,421
Oh, I have to see this.
93
00:04:13,422 --> 00:04:15,023
All right, fine,
94
00:04:15,024 --> 00:04:18,426
we'll call it America versus...
95
00:04:18,427 --> 00:04:21,362
Whatever other crappy
countries play cricket.
96
00:04:21,363 --> 00:04:25,400
The rest of them.
97
00:04:25,401 --> 00:04:26,668
Are you sure you want to invite
98
00:04:26,669 --> 00:04:28,503
the wrath of God into your home?
99
00:04:28,504 --> 00:04:31,105
Two words:
100
00:04:31,106 --> 00:04:35,276
Bring it.
101
00:04:35,277 --> 00:04:39,747
And come hungry. I'll make kabobs.
102
00:04:44,019 --> 00:04:46,621
Wow. Would you look at him.
103
00:04:46,622 --> 00:04:51,125
How lucky is that mail cart?
104
00:04:51,126 --> 00:04:52,560
Why, you want that guy to push you?
105
00:04:52,561 --> 00:04:57,198
Push, pull, lick, his call.
106
00:04:57,199 --> 00:04:59,167
Oh, my God, I know him.
107
00:04:59,168 --> 00:05:01,903
He interviewed for a position
as my assistant last week.
108
00:05:01,904 --> 00:05:05,740
I've got a position
I'd like to offer him.
109
00:05:05,741 --> 00:05:07,375
I've got to see him every day?
110
00:05:07,376 --> 00:05:09,911
Hope this isn't gonna be awkward.
111
00:05:09,912 --> 00:05:12,714
Holy crap, look at him.
112
00:05:12,715 --> 00:05:14,148
Does anybody have a razor?
113
00:05:14,149 --> 00:05:16,884
I need to shave my legs.
114
00:05:16,885 --> 00:05:19,087
I'm looking for Tracy sutter.
115
00:05:19,088 --> 00:05:21,022
Oh, that's me.
116
00:05:21,023 --> 00:05:23,791
I won.
117
00:05:23,792 --> 00:05:25,860
I'm Tracy.
118
00:05:25,861 --> 00:05:27,829
These are for you.
119
00:05:27,830 --> 00:05:29,197
Uh, Laura foley.
120
00:05:29,198 --> 00:05:31,966
Ms. Laura foley, single.
121
00:05:31,967 --> 00:05:34,202
Nice to meet you. I'm Ryan.
122
00:05:34,203 --> 00:05:36,337
Let's see I--I know I have
something for you here.
123
00:05:36,338 --> 00:05:38,840
I am very excited to...
124
00:05:38,841 --> 00:05:41,743
Receive it.
125
00:05:41,744 --> 00:05:44,145
Hi, Audrey Bingham.
We met last week.
126
00:05:44,146 --> 00:05:46,848
I remember.
127
00:05:46,849 --> 00:05:48,149
Nice to meet you.
128
00:05:48,150 --> 00:05:50,118
Yeah, you too, thanks. Mm-hmm.
129
00:05:50,119 --> 00:05:52,954
Bingo!
130
00:05:52,955 --> 00:05:55,456
Well, okay. So it is awkward.
131
00:05:55,457 --> 00:05:56,591
Gonna have to do something
132
00:05:56,592 --> 00:05:58,226
to make things more
comfortable between us.
133
00:05:58,227 --> 00:05:59,794
I know what I would do to
make things comfortable.
134
00:05:59,795 --> 00:06:01,963
I can make things real comfortable.
135
00:06:01,964 --> 00:06:05,066
Oh, ladies, get a grip.
136
00:06:10,105 --> 00:06:12,306
Hey. Oh, hey.
137
00:06:12,307 --> 00:06:14,175
Feel like trading massages?
138
00:06:14,176 --> 00:06:16,077
Definitely.
139
00:06:16,078 --> 00:06:17,945
I hate reading.
140
00:06:17,946 --> 00:06:21,549
Oh, no, no, no.
Today I wanna go first.
141
00:06:21,550 --> 00:06:23,417
Bet you do.
142
00:06:23,418 --> 00:06:27,021
No, I want a real
massage for a half hour
143
00:06:27,022 --> 00:06:28,823
with no touching of
my bathing suit areas.
144
00:06:28,824 --> 00:06:32,660
But that just leaves the rest.
145
00:06:32,661 --> 00:06:35,363
Look, I like doing all
that stuff with you.
146
00:06:35,364 --> 00:06:36,664
Ha, ha, yeah.
147
00:06:36,665 --> 00:06:38,332
But...
148
00:06:38,333 --> 00:06:40,001
I also love a massage.
149
00:06:40,002 --> 00:06:42,069
So today, we're gonna try no sex,
150
00:06:42,070 --> 00:06:45,239
just massage.
151
00:06:45,240 --> 00:06:50,044
I'd rather read.
152
00:06:52,347 --> 00:06:54,048
So what do you wanna
do this weekend?
153
00:06:54,049 --> 00:06:57,251
I kind of want to find a fair.
154
00:06:57,252 --> 00:06:59,687
One with corndogs.
155
00:06:59,688 --> 00:07:01,389
You know, Adam,
156
00:07:01,390 --> 00:07:03,991
the best masseuses don't
talk to their clients.
157
00:07:03,992 --> 00:07:06,093
They concentrate on
giving the massage.
158
00:07:06,094 --> 00:07:09,397
Sorry.
159
00:07:17,940 --> 00:07:20,575
Man on television: And now,
back to shark week.
160
00:07:20,576 --> 00:07:22,476
Oh, my God!
161
00:07:22,477 --> 00:07:24,512
You can't do this one thing for me
162
00:07:24,513 --> 00:07:26,280
without the promise of sex?
163
00:07:26,281 --> 00:07:27,782
Well, honey, it doesn't
have to be sex-sex.
164
00:07:27,783 --> 00:07:29,817
It could be the other thing.
165
00:07:29,818 --> 00:07:31,786
That's still sex.
166
00:07:33,222 --> 00:07:35,623
Yeah, it is.
167
00:07:41,396 --> 00:07:43,798
God, Ryan keeps
giving me dirty looks.
168
00:07:43,799 --> 00:07:46,467
I wish he'd give
me something dirty.
169
00:07:46,468 --> 00:07:47,802
Would you stop?
170
00:07:47,803 --> 00:07:49,337
You're at happy hour
with your coworkers,
171
00:07:49,338 --> 00:07:51,606
not spring break at senor frog's.
172
00:07:51,607 --> 00:07:54,242
Those were good days.
173
00:07:54,243 --> 00:07:56,110
All right, this is ridiculous.
174
00:07:56,111 --> 00:07:58,479
I'm just gonna go over there
and straighten it all out.
175
00:07:58,480 --> 00:08:00,514
Do you mind if I come with?
176
00:08:00,515 --> 00:08:02,617
I'd like to smell him.
177
00:08:02,618 --> 00:08:03,918
Casually mention that
178
00:08:03,919 --> 00:08:05,253
I have a background in burlesque.
179
00:08:05,254 --> 00:08:07,321
No.
180
00:08:07,322 --> 00:08:08,489
Really?
181
00:08:08,490 --> 00:08:12,159
Get me drunk and
ask me about Tokyo.
182
00:08:13,962 --> 00:08:15,029
Hi.
183
00:08:15,030 --> 00:08:16,397
Hi.
184
00:08:16,398 --> 00:08:18,766
Listen, um, we're gonna
be working together
185
00:08:18,767 --> 00:08:20,635
so I--I'd really like
to clear things up.
186
00:08:20,636 --> 00:08:23,938
I feel like you're mad at me
because I didn't hire you,
187
00:08:23,939 --> 00:08:26,674
but the thing is,
it wasn't anything personal.
188
00:08:26,675 --> 00:08:28,342
It was just there were a
lot of good candidates
189
00:08:28,343 --> 00:08:30,278
and I had to make a choice.
190
00:08:30,279 --> 00:08:32,046
I mean, the thing is,
you're young, you're smart,
191
00:08:32,047 --> 00:08:33,147
you're nice looking.
192
00:08:33,148 --> 00:08:34,382
You might be in the mail room now,
193
00:08:34,383 --> 00:08:36,550
but trust me, you're gonna go far.
194
00:08:36,551 --> 00:08:38,853
You really think so? No, I know so.
195
00:08:38,854 --> 00:08:40,554
So come on.
196
00:08:40,555 --> 00:08:42,556
Can we just put everything
behind us and start fresh?
197
00:08:44,426 --> 00:08:46,894
Well...Okay.
198
00:08:48,330 --> 00:08:50,197
Come on.
199
00:08:57,072 --> 00:08:58,572
Uh, there's my beer.
200
00:08:58,573 --> 00:09:00,274
Oh, hey. Put that on my tab.
201
00:09:00,275 --> 00:09:01,342
That's okay.
202
00:09:01,343 --> 00:09:03,577
Hey, don't argue with the boss.
203
00:09:06,682 --> 00:09:08,082
So how did it go?
204
00:09:08,083 --> 00:09:09,350
All better.
205
00:09:09,351 --> 00:09:10,985
I am such a people person.
206
00:09:10,986 --> 00:09:13,788
He filed a sexual harassment claim?
207
00:09:13,789 --> 00:09:15,656
Yes. Against me?
208
00:09:15,657 --> 00:09:16,691
Yes.
209
00:09:16,692 --> 00:09:18,960
Just this morning,
Tracy and Laura--
210
00:09:18,961 --> 00:09:20,061
who I'm pretty sure was
211
00:09:20,062 --> 00:09:22,663
some sort of sex worker in Japan,
212
00:09:22,664 --> 00:09:24,765
tried to coerce him into
a game of strip poker.
213
00:09:24,766 --> 00:09:27,034
They weren't mentioned.
214
00:09:27,035 --> 00:09:28,736
You've gotta be kidding me.
215
00:09:28,737 --> 00:09:30,204
No.
216
00:09:30,205 --> 00:09:33,641
I don't do that.
217
00:09:40,882 --> 00:09:42,716
"Unwanted physical interaction.
218
00:09:42,742 --> 00:09:44,810
"Uninvited comments
about his appearance.
219
00:09:44,811 --> 00:09:47,079
"Giving him alcohol
and implying that
220
00:09:47,080 --> 00:09:51,150
his compliance was tied to
his future at the company."
221
00:09:51,151 --> 00:09:54,653
That's my gal.
222
00:09:54,654 --> 00:09:56,255
God, I can't believe
I got called into
223
00:09:56,256 --> 00:09:58,524
the human resource
director's office.
224
00:09:58,525 --> 00:09:59,825
It's so humiliating.
225
00:09:59,826 --> 00:10:02,327
I know, but you know what else?
226
00:10:02,328 --> 00:10:05,064
I still haven't gotten
a massage from Adam.
227
00:10:05,065 --> 00:10:08,067
'Cause that's the same thing.
228
00:10:08,068 --> 00:10:09,368
Why are you getting
a massage from Adam?
229
00:10:09,369 --> 00:10:12,237
Clearly, Audrey's the
hands-y one around here.
230
00:10:12,238 --> 00:10:15,407
Thank you for your support.
231
00:10:15,408 --> 00:10:16,975
It's just so frustrating.
232
00:10:16,976 --> 00:10:19,178
I mean, I did nothing wrong.
233
00:10:19,179 --> 00:10:21,146
I'm sure if Ryan and
I could just talk--
234
00:10:21,147 --> 00:10:22,381
no.
235
00:10:22,382 --> 00:10:23,549
Yeah, everything would be fine.
236
00:10:23,550 --> 00:10:24,650
No, it wouldn't.
237
00:10:24,651 --> 00:10:26,785
Look, this guy is clearly
a vindictive type.
238
00:10:26,786 --> 00:10:29,621
Just stay away,
let the truth come out.
239
00:10:29,622 --> 00:10:30,923
Look.
240
00:10:30,924 --> 00:10:32,357
I can work this whole thing out.
241
00:10:32,358 --> 00:10:35,094
I'm a people person.
242
00:10:35,095 --> 00:10:38,263
You are?
243
00:10:38,264 --> 00:10:39,398
Yes.
244
00:10:39,399 --> 00:10:40,766
Audrey.
245
00:10:40,767 --> 00:10:42,968
I think we're overlooking
a valuable resource here.
246
00:10:42,969 --> 00:10:45,737
We happen to have years of
sexual harassment experience
247
00:10:45,738 --> 00:10:49,274
right here with us.
248
00:10:49,275 --> 00:10:52,744
Thanks, Jen,
I'll take it from here.
249
00:10:52,745 --> 00:10:55,214
Nice cans, by the way.
250
00:10:55,215 --> 00:10:58,083
The first thing you do
is create a gray area.
251
00:10:58,084 --> 00:11:01,153
Harassment likes facts, not doubt.
252
00:11:01,154 --> 00:11:03,789
Next, get your hands
on some hush money.
253
00:11:03,790 --> 00:11:05,757
Then go to your dad's office,
254
00:11:05,758 --> 00:11:08,694
tell him you're gonna
lay low for a few weeks.
255
00:11:08,695 --> 00:11:11,697
My dad doesn't own
the company, Russell.
256
00:11:11,698 --> 00:11:15,434
Then you're totally boned.
257
00:11:15,435 --> 00:11:18,670
But on the bright side, nice cans.
258
00:11:23,476 --> 00:11:27,713
Ooh, that was a wicked googly,
if I do say so myself.
259
00:11:27,714 --> 00:11:31,183
Don't "say so" yourself,
say real things.
260
00:11:31,184 --> 00:11:35,454
Get set, here comes
an absolute jaffa.
261
00:11:35,455 --> 00:11:37,789
Oh, swing and a miss!
262
00:11:37,790 --> 00:11:39,725
How was that?
You're out for a duck.
263
00:11:40,994 --> 00:11:43,328
Yeah, you're out for a duck.
264
00:11:43,329 --> 00:11:45,797
You don't even know
what that means.
265
00:11:45,798 --> 00:11:48,333
I know I'm not out for a duck.
266
00:11:48,334 --> 00:11:50,269
Well.
267
00:11:50,270 --> 00:11:51,937
I don't think we need
to continue this.
268
00:11:51,938 --> 00:11:53,872
Sorry, America,
but it looks as though
269
00:11:53,873 --> 00:11:56,642
the rest of the
world has triumphed.
270
00:11:56,643 --> 00:11:59,378
You've brought so much
shame to our country.
271
00:11:59,379 --> 00:12:02,214
But playing this video
game proves nothing.
272
00:12:02,215 --> 00:12:04,516
It's not like we're
playing the actual game.
273
00:12:04,517 --> 00:12:07,252
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
274
00:12:07,253 --> 00:12:08,954
You're saying you would beat me
275
00:12:08,955 --> 00:12:10,455
if we played a real
game of cricket.
276
00:12:10,456 --> 00:12:12,891
If it involves a bat and a ball
277
00:12:12,892 --> 00:12:16,995
and even a hint of testosterone,
278
00:12:16,996 --> 00:12:19,464
I win, you lose.
279
00:12:19,465 --> 00:12:21,934
I'll have you know that
back home in South Africa,
280
00:12:21,935 --> 00:12:23,368
I was such a fast bowler,
281
00:12:23,369 --> 00:12:25,637
I was known as the
cape town express.
282
00:12:25,638 --> 00:12:29,274
Sounds like a stomach virus I had.
283
00:12:29,275 --> 00:12:30,776
All right, here's a thought.
284
00:12:30,777 --> 00:12:33,345
Timmy, you're a dork who
actually owns cricket equipment.
285
00:12:33,346 --> 00:12:35,647
Jeff, you're a stubborn blockhead
286
00:12:35,648 --> 00:12:36,882
who would actually play him.
287
00:12:36,883 --> 00:12:38,350
I'd play him. As would I.
288
00:12:38,351 --> 00:12:40,419
Well, this works
out perfectly then.
289
00:12:40,420 --> 00:12:41,653
You two are idiots and I'm bored.
290
00:12:41,654 --> 00:12:44,323
Let's do this.
291
00:12:44,324 --> 00:12:46,225
Then it's decided. Yes, it is.
292
00:12:46,226 --> 00:12:48,894
We'll take this outside
and settle it like men.
293
00:12:48,895 --> 00:12:51,330
Great. Where are we
gonna get the men?
294
00:12:54,033 --> 00:12:57,102
We should go? Okay.
295
00:13:04,344 --> 00:13:07,379
Are you ready for a
totally legitimate
296
00:13:07,380 --> 00:13:11,383
and completely nonsexual massage?
297
00:13:11,384 --> 00:13:12,951
Yes, I am.
298
00:13:12,952 --> 00:13:15,053
I can't believe you did all this.
299
00:13:15,054 --> 00:13:16,521
Well, I realized you were right.
300
00:13:16,522 --> 00:13:18,090
And I want to make up
for all the massages
301
00:13:18,091 --> 00:13:19,858
that I hadn't given you.
302
00:13:19,859 --> 00:13:21,360
I even researched
some great techniques.
303
00:13:21,361 --> 00:13:22,894
Really?
304
00:13:22,895 --> 00:13:24,296
Yeah.
305
00:13:24,297 --> 00:13:28,433
And you know how
much I hate to read.
306
00:13:28,434 --> 00:13:30,636
Here it goes.
307
00:13:36,909 --> 00:13:40,812
Is that okay, baby?
308
00:13:40,813 --> 00:13:42,014
Yeah, it's great,
309
00:13:42,015 --> 00:13:43,615
but maybe you could ease up a bit?
310
00:13:43,616 --> 00:13:46,685
Okay.
311
00:13:49,656 --> 00:13:52,858
Is there anything you'd
like me to concentrate on?
312
00:13:54,294 --> 00:13:57,896
Not crushing my organs.
313
00:14:00,833 --> 00:14:03,735
Well, what do you think's
taking him so long?
314
00:14:03,736 --> 00:14:05,937
Uh, ironing a wrinkle
out of his sweater.
315
00:14:08,808 --> 00:14:10,275
Carb loading on crumpets.
316
00:14:12,545 --> 00:14:15,681
Uh...
317
00:14:15,682 --> 00:14:17,883
That's all I got.
318
00:14:42,508 --> 00:14:45,444
Let's do this.
319
00:14:48,815 --> 00:14:51,783
Shall we?
320
00:14:53,886 --> 00:14:55,754
This is based on a
Japanese technique.
321
00:14:55,755 --> 00:15:00,158
I think it's called reiki or "
wreck-you."
322
00:15:00,159 --> 00:15:03,328
Feels like the second one.
323
00:15:03,329 --> 00:15:06,598
Now this is gonna be amazing.
324
00:15:10,770 --> 00:15:14,172
Ooh! Son of a whore!
325
00:15:14,173 --> 00:15:16,375
Why?
326
00:15:16,376 --> 00:15:18,076
Time for the stomach massage.
327
00:15:18,077 --> 00:15:19,277
Please don't.
328
00:15:19,278 --> 00:15:21,913
No, baby, I insist.
329
00:15:21,914 --> 00:15:25,384
Now this will help with digestion.
330
00:15:25,385 --> 00:15:27,819
You may feel the urge to urinate,
331
00:15:27,820 --> 00:15:30,655
but that's normal.
332
00:15:35,595 --> 00:15:36,695
What are you doing?
333
00:15:36,696 --> 00:15:39,431
Do you have tension in those?
334
00:15:39,432 --> 00:15:40,899
No, I just have to have you.
335
00:15:40,900 --> 00:15:42,434
No, but honey, I felt some kidney--
336
00:15:42,435 --> 00:15:44,736
no.
337
00:15:44,737 --> 00:15:46,938
Okay, so I'm going to give you
338
00:15:46,939 --> 00:15:48,940
three chances to get a hit off me.
339
00:15:48,941 --> 00:15:51,143
Now to approximate the
size of the cricket field,
340
00:15:51,144 --> 00:15:53,178
we'll use the homeless
man to the South
341
00:15:53,179 --> 00:15:54,713
and the shopping cart with
the old chicken carcass
342
00:15:54,714 --> 00:15:55,947
to the East.
343
00:15:55,948 --> 00:15:58,116
So. Let's play.
344
00:15:58,117 --> 00:16:00,419
Uh, shall we wait for
the South boundary
345
00:16:00,420 --> 00:16:03,021
to finish taking a leak?
346
00:16:06,893 --> 00:16:10,796
I think we have that kind of time.
347
00:16:10,797 --> 00:16:12,731
Let's go. You ready?
348
00:16:12,732 --> 00:16:14,833
To hit a ball with the stick?
349
00:16:14,834 --> 00:16:16,134
I think so.
350
00:16:16,135 --> 00:16:19,004
All right. Here we go.
351
00:16:20,740 --> 00:16:23,074
Big hit, huh?
352
00:16:23,075 --> 00:16:26,178
Come on now.
353
00:16:26,179 --> 00:16:28,713
Oh-ho!
354
00:16:28,714 --> 00:16:31,550
Nice swing, Lou "gayrig."
355
00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:42,127
Dude, you're gonna get struck out
356
00:16:42,128 --> 00:16:46,131
by scooter from the muppets.
357
00:16:49,235 --> 00:16:52,137
This one. This one counts.
358
00:16:55,074 --> 00:16:57,309
Ooh.
359
00:16:57,310 --> 00:17:01,713
Right in the googlies.
360
00:17:01,714 --> 00:17:04,549
You were right.
361
00:17:04,550 --> 00:17:08,587
Cricket is a great game.
362
00:17:08,588 --> 00:17:10,755
Told you.
363
00:17:10,756 --> 00:17:12,924
Wait.
364
00:17:12,925 --> 00:17:17,162
Wait, I didn't come out for a duck.
365
00:17:24,403 --> 00:17:26,972
We just heard what
happened with you and Ryan.
366
00:17:26,973 --> 00:17:28,540
Yeah. Can you believe it?
367
00:17:28,541 --> 00:17:31,142
How was he?
368
00:17:31,143 --> 00:17:33,245
Does he smell like the sea?
369
00:17:33,246 --> 00:17:35,714
Oh, my God. Nothing happened.
370
00:17:35,715 --> 00:17:37,849
He is falsely accusing me
of something I didn't do.
371
00:17:37,850 --> 00:17:40,352
Well, that doesn't
sound like my Ryan.
372
00:17:40,353 --> 00:17:42,087
Yeah.
373
00:17:42,088 --> 00:17:44,089
You know, the bar
was the wrong place.
374
00:17:44,090 --> 00:17:45,857
Things were misconstrued, you know?
375
00:17:45,858 --> 00:17:48,126
But I feel like if I
just talk to him again--
376
00:17:48,127 --> 00:17:49,361
so then say something.
377
00:17:49,362 --> 00:17:51,329
Yeah, Jeff doesn't think I should.
378
00:17:51,330 --> 00:17:53,498
Well, does Jeff know
that Ryan's butt
379
00:17:53,499 --> 00:17:56,935
looks like two twinkies kissin'?
380
00:17:56,936 --> 00:17:58,570
Okay, you know what?
381
00:17:58,571 --> 00:18:01,239
Forget Jeff. I'm gonna fix this.
382
00:18:01,240 --> 00:18:02,507
I am a people person.
383
00:18:02,508 --> 00:18:04,509
You are?
384
00:18:04,510 --> 00:18:06,511
Yes! It is a known thing.
385
00:18:06,512 --> 00:18:07,712
Gosh.
386
00:18:07,713 --> 00:18:09,481
Ryan. Ryan.
387
00:18:09,482 --> 00:18:10,649
Oh, come on.
388
00:18:10,650 --> 00:18:11,883
Ryan, listen, we need to talk.
389
00:18:11,884 --> 00:18:13,351
I'd like to get on
the elevator, please.
390
00:18:13,352 --> 00:18:16,221
Yeah. First, just hear me out.
391
00:18:16,222 --> 00:18:18,189
All right, from the
first moment I met you,
392
00:18:18,190 --> 00:18:20,125
I liked you.
393
00:18:20,126 --> 00:18:22,694
And this situation has
been very hard for me.
394
00:18:22,695 --> 00:18:25,330
Because I have never done anything
395
00:18:25,331 --> 00:18:28,633
to even remotely
sexually harass you.
396
00:18:28,634 --> 00:18:29,868
I'm--what the hell?
397
00:18:29,869 --> 00:18:31,403
No.
398
00:18:31,404 --> 00:18:34,773
No. Oh, God, no, no, no!
399
00:18:36,375 --> 00:18:38,643
Don't just stand there,
rip my dress off me!
400
00:18:38,644 --> 00:18:43,114
Tear it off! Get it off!
401
00:18:43,115 --> 00:18:46,585
I will give you,
it was an unfortunate incident.
402
00:18:46,586 --> 00:18:48,887
Audrey, you exposed yourself.
403
00:18:48,888 --> 00:18:50,989
It was an accident.
404
00:18:50,990 --> 00:18:52,657
You're the first person
405
00:18:52,658 --> 00:18:54,693
to have this type of accident ever.
406
00:18:54,694 --> 00:18:58,430
Ugh. God, this is so unfair.
407
00:18:58,431 --> 00:19:00,532
And you need some more
tape on your dress.
408
00:19:00,533 --> 00:19:03,168
I'm gonna have my own claim soon.
409
00:19:03,169 --> 00:19:04,369
Sorry.
410
00:19:04,370 --> 00:19:07,005
The good news is,
because of your spotless record
411
00:19:07,006 --> 00:19:08,807
and no prior flashings,
412
00:19:08,808 --> 00:19:11,009
all you have to do
is apologize to Ryan.
413
00:19:11,010 --> 00:19:14,079
I most certainly will not.
414
00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:16,114
He is the one who should
be apologizing to me.
415
00:19:16,115 --> 00:19:18,049
I know, it seems unfair.
416
00:19:18,050 --> 00:19:19,384
But it won't go on your record
417
00:19:19,385 --> 00:19:22,554
if you apologize and
take a brief suspension.
418
00:19:22,555 --> 00:19:24,889
Oh-- I couldn't care less.
419
00:19:24,890 --> 00:19:27,125
You put it on my record.
I did nothing wrong.
420
00:19:27,126 --> 00:19:28,360
Audrey. No, no.
421
00:19:28,361 --> 00:19:30,362
I am standing up for
what is right here.
422
00:19:30,363 --> 00:19:32,664
I am a people person, you jerk.
423
00:19:32,665 --> 00:19:35,934
Your suspension is with pay.
424
00:19:39,205 --> 00:19:42,273
I am very sorry that I created
425
00:19:42,274 --> 00:19:43,875
a hostile work environment for you.
426
00:19:43,876 --> 00:19:45,977
Thank you.
427
00:19:45,978 --> 00:19:48,013
I'll be back in a week.
428
00:19:48,014 --> 00:19:49,881
Aloha.
429
00:19:49,882 --> 00:19:52,083
I mean, good-bye.
430
00:19:52,093 --> 00:19:56,993
431
00:19:57,000 --> 00:20:00,146
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