All language subtitles for Roseanne s01e23 Lets Call It Quits.eng

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i never thought
i'd say this,

but i actually
miss booker.

well, that's because
our new supervisor's

- a real slime ball.
- i agree.

that mr. faber's a pain in
the butt. pardon my language.

you sewer mouth!

you know, faber wouldn't
get on my nerves so much

if he'd just die.

no, no, death's
too good for him.

what he really deserves is
to have to work for himself.

i don't know.

i think we should explore this
death idea a little further.

are you hens still cackling
about the new rooster?

when we find a rooster,
lou, we'll cackle.

okay, lou, how?
how do you handle faber?

two words:
look busy.

well, i got two
words for you, lou.

anyway.

well, are you little
ladies enjoying your lunch?

well, the veal
is tres bien.

and how was
your swordfish, sis?

as usual, the food is to die for,

but the
ambience stinks.

hey, uh, blondie,

your work station's
a mess.

well, we always clean up
at the end of the day.

i know.

but your area's
an obvious safety hazard.

and if you'll refer
to the employee's manual,

you'll note that
the supervisor

is responsible for spotting
and eliminating safety hazards.

well, great,

while you're doing that,
can we see the dessert tray?

i hate to give
an order twice.

aw, sit down,
blondie.

this here is a job
for a brunette.

- super brunette!
- da-da-da-da!

fABER:
i wasn't talking to you.

i was talking
to her.

well, then you're obviously
tampering with destiny here,

if you're willing to sweep up
little bits of plastic

on your lunch hour
for no apparent reason."

da-da-da-da!

boy, one thing i hate to see
in a plastics factory

is little bits of plastic
laying around.

well, they won't be
laying around much longer,

will they?

so you're just gonna
stand there and watch me?

maybe i will,

maybe i won't.

well, that's a big
decision there.

i guess that's why they
pay you the big bucks, huh?

will you hold this
for a minute?

honey, i'm not
here to hold.

i'm here
to supervise.

oh, yeah, i get it-
shirt, tie.

that's what you do.
i must be stupid.

well, when you're right,
you're right.

how long you
been here, anyway?

long enough.

your, uh,

personnel file
says 11 years.

you know, the last three supervisors
was checking out my personnel file,

but do you see any
of them around here?

your work is great
compared to your attitude.

well, i'm just keeping
the morale up, you know,

trying to make
your job easier.

that's what i'm talking
about, your attitude.

now, my brother
has this dairy farm.

you know, some of those cows
take to milking right off,

some of 'em take
a little longer.

every once in a while you
run across a real stubborn one.

but you
know what?

sooner or later...

they all give milk.

well, nothing like a little
livestock story to start out the day.

i think you know
what i mean, sugar.

girls, you'll never believe
what he wanted me to do!

well...

well, mr. faber.

well, i'm afraid
this old girl's

got to put
it to bed.

- sylvia, it's friday night.
- and it's early.

yeah, but i need
two days to recover.

- you know, these new quotas are killing me.
- cRYSTAL: yeah.

- good night, everybody.
- night, sylvia.

faber's a maniac.

oh, hey, he passed maniac
about a month ago.

you got that right.

when i'm really smokin', i can
pull maybe 15 units a minute.

that's, uh,
900 units an hour,

which is 7,200
units a day.

and my quota's
8,000.

what does
he think i am?

- a factory worker.
- you got that right.

here's a couple of cold ones for the
tired working masses yearning to be free.

hey, don't forget
the unemployed masses.

i better not drink this.
i may do something i regret.

yeah, like last time you left
your barrettes in the bathroom.

well, i'm one sip
of beer away

from going over to the phone, calling
that mr. faber and giving him what for.

dan, you better
hose her down.

my quota's 8,000.
i can't do 8,000.

- i can maybe do 7,000.
- i don't know what's with this guy.

- nobody can do 8,000 units.
- mm-mmm.

i heard him say
last week,

there may not be any room at wellman
for people who can't make the quota.

he'd fire us for
not making 8,000?

we gotta put a contract
out on this guy,

or we gotta send somebody up to the
front office and complain to mr. wellman.

what for? wellman doesn't set the quotas.

faber does. i used to
set 'em when i was there.

oh, it's so unfair.

- that scum bucket.
- so we're killing ourselves so he can look good?

it's so unfair!

now, when i was there,

i never set the quota
higher than 5,500.

boy, i like a guy
with low standards.

if faber set
the quotas too high,

you gotta tell him
he's unrealistic.

not to mention
just downright silly.

oh, dan,
cut me off.

well, somebody needs
to go and talk to faber.

somebody needs
to set this guy straight.

somebody
really does.

well, somebody
doesn't feel like it,

so just forget about it.

i mean, you're talking about
a guy that wants to see my head

mounted above
the women's restroom.

- forget it.
- jACKIE: roseanne?

remember when we were little kids
and we used to go out in the backyard

way in the corner so we
couldn't see the house,

and we'd imagine what we
were gonna do when we grew up?

i was gonna own and operate
a chain of pet stores,

and you were gonna go to new york city and
become editor in chief of mother earth news.

so, how come
20 years later

we're sitting
in a dive like this

figuring out how to hang
on to a job that we hate

for eight bucks an hour, which
we can't even live off of anyway,

try to fill quotas
that we can't fill,

'cause if we don't, we're
gonna get canned? it's-

you got some pretzel
hanging off your chin.

come in.

well, you sure keep this place
neater than booker ever did.

and you got rid of
miss january.

i'm personally
grateful for that.

what do you want,
roseanne?

well, i was wondering if we could
maybe talk, you know, like people.

sure. have yourself
a seat, sugar.

can i close
the door?

whenever that door closes, things
tend to slow down out there.

yeah, well, i guess
you're right about that.

yeah, you'd know.

what can i
do for you?

well, i was hoping that
maybe this would be

a good time to, um,
discuss quotas.

sure.

okay, you know that new
8,000 unit quota thing?

that's, like, very difficult.
i mean, it's very difficult.

uh-huh.

here we are, working
eight hours a day,

and we're busting our hump,
and we still come up short.

we can't do it.

it's very demoralizing,
you know?

live with it.

hey, i'm telling you that
we can't meet our quotas.

then what do you suggest
we do about it, honey bunch?

- i suggest you lower the quotas.
- yeah.

then maybe a couple days a week
we could all knock off early

and have
a factory picnic.

yeah, like that!

okay, like you
lower the quotas, okay?

what happens is, like,
then morale goes up,

and then when morale goes up, i mean,
the productivity increases, you know?

i mean, we look good,
you look good.

i know how business
works, sugar.

you scratch my back,
i scratch your back.

now, i'm more than willing
to scratch your back.

the big question is,

are you willing
to scratch mine?

now, mrs. faber isn't
gonna pop out of a closet

dressed up like
a dutch girl, now is she?

that's exactly what
i'm talking about:

disrespect
and a smart mouth.

okay, so just cut
to the chase, faber.

you want the quotas lowered?
i'll lower the quotas.

thank you very much.

what a minute.

i've still
got an itch.

so, lay it on me.
what do you want?

i want you to modify
your behavior.

i don't want you ever
talking back to me.

i don't want to be
the butt of your jokes.

and when you speak to me, i
want you to do it with respect.

and no one but you and me will
ever know we had this little talk.

no one,

or else
the quotas stay up

and the pink slips
go out.

do we have a deal?

yes.

yes, what?

yes, we have a deal.

sir.

- what are you gonna do this weekend?
- hey, that's right.

we've got an actual weekend i don't
have to use to catch up on sleep.

i never thought 6,500 units
would seem like a vacation.

what do you guys
got lined up?

oh, probably
just the usual.

i'm going to the science
fair at willy's school.

he made a brontosaurus
out of egg cartons.

once when roseanne was in school,
you made something out of egg cartons.

- what was that?
- stonehenge.

hey, you guys, uh,

why don't we take care of
this before we go on break?

why don't we take care
of it after work?

'cause we're gonna get in a hassle
with faber and he's gonna win,

and life is
just too short,

so let's take care of it
and forget about it.

roseanne, honey,
you know the rule:

no food outside
the lunchroom.

oh.
this is gum.

thank you, doll.
i appreciate your cooperation.

and, uh...

when you're
done here,

would you mind putting some
paper towels in the men's room?

no, i don't mind.

thanks.

what's
with you?

come on, he lowered the quota.
why push our luck?

come on, mom!

yeah, just five
more minutes.

not five more minutes. not
one more minute. it is 9:00.

9:00 is your bedtime.
what does that tell you?

- you're ticked off.
- go.

what's all
the hubbub, bub?

you know,
they're your kids too,

or maybe you just don't even
care what time they go to bed.

they're two minutes late.
what's the big deal?

the big deal is that they don't
know how to obey the rules.

- what's the matter, hon?
- don't call me hon.

- babe, i've been calling you hon for 15 years.
- don't call me babe neither.

look, lady!

i'm sorry, dan.
it ain't you.

- that faber guy?
- god, i hate him!

want me to beat
him up for you?

no.

come on, i will.

- what would you do to him?
- okay.

okay, like, um, i'd wait for him
by the bike rack after school.

and then, you know, i'd wait
for him to come out of gym class,

um, and i'd put a bunch
of marbles in my sock

and i'd say, "hey, keith, come
on over to my house after school.

i've got the original cast
recording of carousel."

god, i sold my soul to
the devil for 6,500 units!

what the hell are
you talking about?

i made a deal
with him.

he said he'd lower the
quotas if i lowered myself

and showed him
some respect,

but a little's
turned into a lot.

i just can't
take it anymore.

honey, if you're that miserable, just quit.

- it's not worth it.
- i can't quit.

well, you can't
go on like this.

i mean, i'd lose everything. i
wouldn't get any hospitalization.

i couldn't get any
kind of unemployment.

the kids could never
get sick, or grow.

we had kids before
we had hospitalization.

we'll manage.

it'll take a long time
to find another job.

we'll manage.

we got married, they
said we wouldn't make it.

we had three kids,
they said we wouldn't make it.

you know what
we're like?

we're like one of
those clown balloons

that every time
you knock it over,

it just turns
right-side up again.

we'll be okay.

well, say i quit,
okay?

and then becky comes
in here and she wants

a new pair of
designer jeans, okay?

- mm-hmm. - so then what
are you gonna tell her?

well, i'd have to
tell her the truth.

i'd just look her right
in the eye and say, "honey,

you know you could've
had those jeans

if your mom hadn't been a
big baby and quit her job."

- supportive?
- i think so.

not.

roseanne, you know i'm right. admit it.

jackie, did it
ever occur to you

that maybe i just do not
like putting people down?

no, no. it did occur to me
that you were losing your touch.

- well, think again.
- how about yesterday?

faber was in here
throwing his weight around,

you had a golden opportunity
to slam him, and you didn't.

you stooped to an all-time
low and called him "sir."

- don't remind me.
- what's the matter with you?

jackie, maybe she's going
through something personal.

oh, yeah,
right, crystal.

ladies, can i have
your attention?

sure, mr. faber.

i have a little
announcement to make.

now, plastics is
a competitive industry.

now, let's face it, we
make money selling product.

so it only stands to reason,
the more product we sell,

the more money
we're gonna make.

so what are
you raising our quotas to?

nothing you girls
can't handle.

we're gonna try
8,000 again.

and i have every confidence that
you girls can cut the mustard.

and if you can't,

it's been nice
working with you.

can you
believe that?

- i'll never make that quota.
- come on, roseanne.

i'll buy you
a cup of coffee.

i'll be there
in a minute.

what the hell do you think
you're doing? we had a deal.

the operative word here,
roseanne, is "had."

yeah, i know
who you are.

i know who you are, and if you didn't
have this job, you'd be in an alley.

you sound angry,
roseanne.

you told me if i towed the line that you'd
drop the quotas. why are you doing this?

- because i can.
- no, you can't.

i did, and when
i broke you,

i knew you were just
like the rest of 'em.

and you'll stay
and you'll do your 8,000,

and so will your loser friends,
or they're gone.

well, this ain't the way
you motivate people.

and you know what?
any manager would know that.

and you are a lot of things,
but you ain't no manager.

sweetheart, you just bought
yourself a bunch of trouble.

no, sweetheart,
you did.

hey, i'm not done with you. don't
you walk away when i'm talking to you.

- you okay, sis?
- no, i'm not okay.

i mean, i tried
to be okay,

but he doesn't
want me to be okay.

he doesn't want any of us
to be okay. you know why?

because he's
not okay, okay?

roseanne, i told you
not to walk away from me.

i'm walking away from you, faber, and i'm
walking away from this stinking factory.

i'm walking away
from this lousy job.

well, that was a wonderful
performance, roseanne.

but if any of you are
considering joining her,

may i point out there are
two doors to this room:

one that pays
and one that doesn't.

i guess we're not gonna make
our quota today, honey bunch.

- here goes.
- thank you.

i can't believe i did this.

i mean, i'm glad i did it,

but i can't believe i did it.

oh, so you spilled
the beer nuts.

big deal.

i can't believe
i quit.

oh, oh.

you know, i was at that factory
longer than anybody here.

you know what i'm going
to miss about wellman most?

not one damn thing!

i can't believe
i quit.

it's high time
that we thank

the woman responsible
for our emancipation-

my sister,
ex-wellman employee,

and a heck of a woman
in her own right-

what was your
name again?

sally field.

aLL: yay!

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