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Downloaded From www.AllSubs.org
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what's with
the laundry stuff all over?
3
00:00:54,969 --> 00:00:57,334
i gotta find my blue skirt
for the picture.
4
00:00:57,369 --> 00:01:00,501
- what picture?
- dad's getting a photographer
5
00:01:00,536 --> 00:01:02,667
to take some stupid
family portrait.
6
00:01:02,702 --> 00:01:05,033
he's doing what?
7
00:01:05,068 --> 00:01:07,133
if i order
the 32-piece package,
8
00:01:07,168 --> 00:01:08,501
you'll throw in
the wallet size?
9
00:01:08,536 --> 00:01:10,367
- dan!
- one sec, babe.
10
00:01:10,402 --> 00:01:12,801
yeah, i understand the offer
expires this weekend.
11
00:01:12,836 --> 00:01:15,267
what are you doing?
what are you doing?
12
00:01:15,302 --> 00:01:18,400
i think i better
talk to my wife first.
13
00:01:18,435 --> 00:01:20,200
right, bye.
14
00:01:23,133 --> 00:01:25,567
honey, guess what
i just did.
15
00:01:25,602 --> 00:01:28,200
it doesn't have anything to do
with a once-in-a-lifetime
16
00:01:28,235 --> 00:01:30,467
money-saving offer,
does it?
17
00:01:30,502 --> 00:01:33,567
no. what would you say
to a full-color
18
00:01:33,602 --> 00:01:35,634
commemorative
family portrait?
19
00:01:35,669 --> 00:01:38,100
of whose family?
20
00:01:38,135 --> 00:01:39,601
ours.
21
00:01:39,636 --> 00:01:42,467
- what do we need that for?
- 'cause this came today.
22
00:01:42,502 --> 00:01:44,667
we got our 15-year high school
reunion coming up.
23
00:01:45,734 --> 00:01:47,734
oh, spare me.
24
00:01:47,769 --> 00:01:49,434
what happened
to your school spirit?
25
00:01:49,469 --> 00:01:53,767
i lost it on prom night
along with everything else.
26
00:01:56,133 --> 00:01:59,167
ah, great, cream-style!
27
00:01:59,202 --> 00:02:01,067
no, check this out.
28
00:02:01,102 --> 00:02:03,067
the reunion committee
is updating the yearbook
29
00:02:03,102 --> 00:02:05,267
and they want us to send in
a family portrait.
30
00:02:05,302 --> 00:02:08,734
why, to see if we've
improved with age?
31
00:02:08,769 --> 00:02:12,100
roseanne, people will be looking
at this yearbook for years to come.
32
00:02:12,135 --> 00:02:14,400
i think we should send in the
best picture we possibly can.
33
00:02:14,435 --> 00:02:17,868
we should send 'em in that
one of us in yellowstone park.
34
00:02:17,903 --> 00:02:22,033
rosie, we're mooning
old faithful in that one.
35
00:02:23,267 --> 00:02:25,567
i know, but it fits in
with the theme here,
36
00:02:25,602 --> 00:02:28,000
"looking back on 15 years."
37
00:02:29,934 --> 00:02:33,300
whose lame-brain idea
is this anyways?
38
00:02:33,335 --> 00:02:35,501
oh, my god,
it's phyllis zimmer.
39
00:02:35,536 --> 00:02:37,501
that pointy-head little phony.
40
00:02:37,536 --> 00:02:40,100
wasn't she the one
that was always in charge
41
00:02:40,135 --> 00:02:42,067
of everything
in high school?
42
00:02:48,102 --> 00:02:49,968
"come on, everybody.
grab some crepe paper.
43
00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:51,367
we're gonna go in the gym
and decorate,
44
00:02:51,402 --> 00:02:53,000
and then we'll make punch."
45
00:02:54,300 --> 00:02:56,133
i like it.
46
00:02:56,168 --> 00:02:58,334
do it again,
only jump up and down.
47
00:02:58,369 --> 00:02:59,934
shake your pom-poms.
48
00:02:59,969 --> 00:03:01,467
get away from me.
49
00:03:01,502 --> 00:03:03,901
you know why she wants us
to send in a picture?
50
00:03:03,936 --> 00:03:08,167
to make sure her life
turned out the best.
51
00:03:13,634 --> 00:03:16,000
mom, d.j.'s bothering me.
52
00:03:16,035 --> 00:03:17,567
i'm a cowboy.
53
00:03:17,602 --> 00:03:20,934
no, you're not
any kind of a cowboy.
54
00:03:37,903 --> 00:03:39,801
mom, i can't do my homework.
55
00:03:39,836 --> 00:03:42,167
you can't do your homework
'cause the tv's on.
56
00:03:44,035 --> 00:03:46,434
gimme that rope, partner.
i need that for your daddy.
57
00:03:46,469 --> 00:03:49,067
- can i tie you up?
- yeah.
58
00:03:49,102 --> 00:03:51,200
i don't mean to push,
but i gotta call flash photo
59
00:03:51,235 --> 00:03:53,200
and let 'em know
what the deal is.
60
00:03:53,235 --> 00:03:55,501
your tail's really wagging
over this picture, isn't it?
61
00:03:56,602 --> 00:03:58,067
picture? what picture?
62
00:03:58,102 --> 00:04:00,100
are we getting
our picture taken?
63
00:04:00,135 --> 00:04:01,601
we're thinking about it.
64
00:04:01,636 --> 00:04:05,167
you guys aren't gonna do what
you did in yellowstone, are you?
65
00:04:06,267 --> 00:04:08,734
we're thinking about it.
66
00:04:12,701 --> 00:04:14,567
gimme one of these.
67
00:04:14,602 --> 00:04:17,667
- where is your lunch?
- i ate it.
68
00:04:17,702 --> 00:04:19,400
just one.
69
00:04:19,435 --> 00:04:20,734
hey, roseanne...
70
00:04:20,769 --> 00:04:23,400
i hear dan kept you up
half the night last night.
71
00:04:23,435 --> 00:04:25,467
ooh!
72
00:04:25,502 --> 00:04:28,667
it's not as good
as it sounds, porno-head.
73
00:04:29,736 --> 00:04:31,367
he was up all night
looking for a belt
74
00:04:31,402 --> 00:04:33,334
that matches his tie
and his shirt.
75
00:04:33,369 --> 00:04:36,000
he's gonna wear himself out
over this picture.
76
00:04:36,035 --> 00:04:38,067
yeah, and i have to give up
a whole saturday
77
00:04:38,102 --> 00:04:40,767
to impress some people
i didn't even like back then.
78
00:04:40,802 --> 00:04:43,100
i sure cared what
my schoolmates thought.
79
00:04:43,135 --> 00:04:45,300
we know, crystal.
80
00:04:46,434 --> 00:04:48,434
they voted me
second runner-up
81
00:04:48,469 --> 00:04:50,467
for junior sweetheart queen.
82
00:04:50,502 --> 00:04:53,334
i would've won,
except for tristi vane.
83
00:04:53,369 --> 00:04:56,934
she got her hair done...
which was against the rules.
84
00:04:56,969 --> 00:04:58,801
wOMAN:
i know the type.
85
00:04:58,836 --> 00:05:01,534
perfect hair,
perfect teeth.
86
00:05:01,569 --> 00:05:03,434
matching sweater
and headband.
87
00:05:04,702 --> 00:05:06,868
i think that's a smart look.
88
00:05:08,934 --> 00:05:12,234
well, that's why you
came in second, crystal.
89
00:05:12,269 --> 00:05:15,200
- i always hated those
frilly-dilly types. - uh-huh.
90
00:05:15,235 --> 00:05:18,634
we had a girl like that
in our school, huh, sis?
91
00:05:18,669 --> 00:05:20,834
i don't even like
remembering it.
92
00:05:20,869 --> 00:05:23,400
her locker was next to mine
this one day,
93
00:05:23,435 --> 00:05:26,067
and i didn't know
my rifle was loaded.
94
00:05:29,701 --> 00:05:31,467
it blew her right in half.
95
00:05:33,067 --> 00:05:34,667
she didn't know.
96
00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:37,834
it took me almost all of
fifth period to get over it.
97
00:05:39,567 --> 00:05:41,434
there's no paper towels.
98
00:05:41,469 --> 00:05:43,667
you know, this is
the third time this week.
99
00:05:43,702 --> 00:05:45,968
how come there's always
paper towels in the men's room?
100
00:05:46,003 --> 00:05:47,701
they never dry their hands.
101
00:05:47,736 --> 00:05:49,601
yeah, 'cause they never
wash their hands.
102
00:05:50,836 --> 00:05:52,734
i don't know why
management
103
00:05:52,769 --> 00:05:55,067
can't give us
the supplies we need.
104
00:05:55,102 --> 00:05:58,000
oh. this has got nothing
to do with paper towels.
105
00:05:58,035 --> 00:06:00,100
this is just a sneaky
old ploy by management
106
00:06:00,135 --> 00:06:02,701
to get us all worked up
in a huff about small stuff
107
00:06:02,736 --> 00:06:05,167
so we never think about things
that are really important
108
00:06:05,202 --> 00:06:09,534
like benefits and pay raises
and uh, fresher vending items.
109
00:06:09,569 --> 00:06:11,868
those slimeballs
are trying to break us.
110
00:06:13,168 --> 00:06:16,100
yeah, i get so sick of how
you guys get so worked up
111
00:06:16,135 --> 00:06:18,033
over every little thing.
112
00:06:23,133 --> 00:06:25,400
mAN: hi, roseanne.
113
00:06:28,235 --> 00:06:31,033
what'd i tell you
about going in there?
114
00:06:31,068 --> 00:06:33,167
she likes it in there.
115
00:06:34,434 --> 00:06:35,968
she wants to be a man.
116
00:06:36,003 --> 00:06:38,901
that makes two of us,
huh, pete?
117
00:06:42,501 --> 00:06:46,033
hey, ladies, not only do they
have all the paper towels,
118
00:06:46,068 --> 00:06:49,834
but they got great, big old
drinking fountains in there too.
119
00:06:51,936 --> 00:06:53,901
you know what the problem
with you women is.
120
00:06:53,936 --> 00:06:56,167
you use too damn many
paper products.
121
00:06:56,202 --> 00:06:59,133
oh, shut up or i'll wipe
my hands on your bald head.
122
00:06:59,168 --> 00:07:01,501
bOOKER: i'll tell you what,
i'll make sure
123
00:07:01,536 --> 00:07:04,400
that you ladies
get some paper towels.
124
00:07:04,435 --> 00:07:08,234
hooker, we want 'em now,
or we don't go back to work.
125
00:07:08,269 --> 00:07:09,267
strike!
126
00:07:09,302 --> 00:07:11,000
strike!
127
00:07:12,634 --> 00:07:14,133
pete, get some towels.
128
00:07:34,667 --> 00:07:36,834
hey, dad. look,
you know what'd be cool?
129
00:07:36,869 --> 00:07:38,601
we can put this
in the picture.
130
00:07:38,636 --> 00:07:39,934
no, that'd be too much, honey.
131
00:07:39,969 --> 00:07:41,634
come on, dad.
it'd be so cool.
132
00:07:41,669 --> 00:07:43,801
look, we could
put it right here.
133
00:07:43,836 --> 00:07:46,767
yeah, it does add
a certain something.
134
00:07:46,802 --> 00:07:50,400
i hate my hair, i hate my
clothes, i hate my face.
135
00:07:50,435 --> 00:07:52,868
well, that makes two of us.
136
00:07:52,903 --> 00:07:56,334
honey, i already told you.
you look fine.
137
00:07:56,369 --> 00:07:58,000
i can't get my hair right.
138
00:07:58,035 --> 00:08:00,467
shave it and shut up.
139
00:08:00,502 --> 00:08:02,367
i hate this sweater.
140
00:08:02,402 --> 00:08:04,267
hey, dad,
you know what would be cool?
141
00:08:04,302 --> 00:08:06,234
we could all
wear our sunglasses
142
00:08:06,269 --> 00:08:09,167
and hang out
the back of the truck.
143
00:08:09,202 --> 00:08:11,033
ix-nay on the shades,
princess.
144
00:08:11,068 --> 00:08:13,767
let's just try and
look like a normal family.
145
00:08:13,802 --> 00:08:15,767
well, why can't
we be ourselves?
146
00:08:17,467 --> 00:08:19,734
how do i look, dad?
147
00:08:19,769 --> 00:08:22,367
top drawer, amigo!
148
00:08:22,402 --> 00:08:25,534
daddy's little man.
149
00:08:25,569 --> 00:08:27,400
what about this?
150
00:08:27,435 --> 00:08:29,267
fine, perfect.
okay, come on.
151
00:08:29,302 --> 00:08:31,667
d.j., you stand here.
becky, you're here.
152
00:08:31,702 --> 00:08:32,868
darlene, you're over here.
153
00:08:32,903 --> 00:08:35,601
darlene, hurry up.
ha-ha-ha-ha!
154
00:08:35,636 --> 00:08:36,834
hyah!
155
00:08:36,869 --> 00:08:38,801
okay, you're over here.
156
00:08:38,836 --> 00:08:41,801
mom's here.
okay, i'm here.
157
00:08:41,836 --> 00:08:44,200
darlene,
you're blocking the trophy.
158
00:08:47,634 --> 00:08:49,868
this ain't too shabby.
we look pretty good.
159
00:08:49,903 --> 00:08:51,868
rosie, come here
and check this out.
160
00:08:51,903 --> 00:08:55,634
- kIDS: whoa!
- bECKY: look at mom.
161
00:08:56,734 --> 00:08:58,934
ooh, la-la,
look at you.
162
00:08:58,969 --> 00:09:02,734
stunning, ain't it?
i brushed my teeth.
163
00:09:02,769 --> 00:09:04,601
what happened to you?
164
00:09:04,636 --> 00:09:06,634
this is the real me.
165
00:09:06,669 --> 00:09:08,434
that's my favorite dress.
166
00:09:08,469 --> 00:09:11,567
well, you can wear it tonight
when we're alone.
167
00:09:12,667 --> 00:09:14,300
help me with
this necklace, honey.
168
00:09:14,335 --> 00:09:15,968
all right.
169
00:09:16,003 --> 00:09:17,901
rOSEANNE:
don't choke me now.
170
00:09:17,936 --> 00:09:19,868
- hi.
- rOSEANNE: hi.
171
00:09:19,903 --> 00:09:22,334
am i in the wrong house?
172
00:09:22,369 --> 00:09:26,133
you bet. you want the one
right down the street.
173
00:09:26,168 --> 00:09:28,100
you guys look great!
174
00:09:28,135 --> 00:09:31,167
- what are you doing here?
- laundry. it's saturday.
175
00:09:31,202 --> 00:09:34,033
besides, i gotta make sure
this hack photographer you hired
176
00:09:34,068 --> 00:09:35,667
doesn't screw the picture up.
177
00:09:35,702 --> 00:09:39,000
oh, aunt jackie,
i have to show you something.
178
00:09:40,534 --> 00:09:41,834
hey.
179
00:09:41,869 --> 00:09:43,868
you look pretty
handsome there, sport.
180
00:09:43,903 --> 00:09:45,701
i know.
181
00:09:45,736 --> 00:09:48,334
you know, this is the first time
we've had a real photographer
182
00:09:48,369 --> 00:09:50,367
take our picture
since our wedding day.
183
00:09:50,402 --> 00:09:52,834
yeah, black sunday.
184
00:09:53,901 --> 00:09:56,234
who are you kiddin'?
you loved it.
185
00:09:56,269 --> 00:09:58,167
you practically
ran down the aisle.
186
00:09:58,202 --> 00:09:59,734
yeah, but i was just drunk
187
00:09:59,769 --> 00:10:02,000
and i meant to go
the other way.
188
00:10:04,969 --> 00:10:06,167
jACKIE:
come here, come here.
189
00:10:06,202 --> 00:10:09,033
- look at your dad.
- what you got here?
190
00:10:09,068 --> 00:10:11,801
- your senior yearbook.
- your football picture.
191
00:10:11,836 --> 00:10:13,000
old '67.
192
00:10:13,035 --> 00:10:14,467
ha!
193
00:10:14,502 --> 00:10:17,100
hey, wait a minute,
what's wrong with your nose?
194
00:10:17,135 --> 00:10:19,367
he always flared
his nostrils out like that
195
00:10:19,402 --> 00:10:21,334
'cause he thought
it made him look mean.
196
00:10:21,369 --> 00:10:25,634
no, it's 'cause of the way
the other guy smelled.
197
00:10:25,669 --> 00:10:28,634
oh, here's you, mom.
you look so queer.
198
00:10:28,669 --> 00:10:30,400
i can't believe
you wore a flip.
199
00:10:30,435 --> 00:10:32,601
that's when
i was going through
200
00:10:32,636 --> 00:10:36,200
my marlo thomas'
"that girl" phase.
201
00:10:36,235 --> 00:10:38,234
i was gonna
go to new york
202
00:10:38,269 --> 00:10:40,434
and become
a writer/spokesmodel.
203
00:10:40,469 --> 00:10:42,567
you gave it all up for
a guy with flared nostrils
204
00:10:42,602 --> 00:10:44,300
and stinky friends.
205
00:10:45,534 --> 00:10:47,100
i think you look pretty.
206
00:10:47,135 --> 00:10:50,200
well, i think
you look purdy too.
207
00:10:50,235 --> 00:10:52,200
dad, when did you
fall in love with mom?
208
00:10:52,235 --> 00:10:54,767
as soon as she
told me to, honey.
209
00:10:56,068 --> 00:10:58,701
you couldn't pry them apart.
it was disgusting.
210
00:10:58,736 --> 00:11:00,367
well, what about you, mom?
211
00:11:00,402 --> 00:11:02,701
were you always
in love with dad?
212
00:11:02,736 --> 00:11:06,634
he was all man and
all mine- ooh, baby, baby.
213
00:11:06,669 --> 00:11:09,667
it was shameless the way
your mother chased me.
214
00:11:09,702 --> 00:11:12,000
every day she'd be there at
my locker, panting and clawing.
215
00:11:12,035 --> 00:11:14,300
yeah, back in
the good old days
216
00:11:14,335 --> 00:11:17,501
when i still had a waistline
and some estrogen.
217
00:11:17,536 --> 00:11:19,367
i can't believe
how young we are here.
218
00:11:19,402 --> 00:11:21,701
we're all like five years
older than becky.
219
00:11:21,736 --> 00:11:25,901
don't give her any ideas.
it wasn't all a picnic.
220
00:11:25,936 --> 00:11:28,100
what about that week
you broke up with me?
221
00:11:28,135 --> 00:11:30,100
- i didn't break up with you.
- yeah, you did.
222
00:11:30,135 --> 00:11:32,000
that week of senior year.
223
00:11:32,035 --> 00:11:34,300
- you broke up with me.
- i did not.
224
00:11:34,335 --> 00:11:37,300
i was just trying to keep you on
your toes and shake you up a bit.
225
00:11:37,335 --> 00:11:39,267
we were at arnie patterson's
garage dance,
226
00:11:39,302 --> 00:11:41,868
and we had that big fight, and you
said you were gonna see other people.
227
00:11:41,903 --> 00:11:43,934
he's right, i remember,
'cause you had just read
228
00:11:43,969 --> 00:11:46,167
that article about how
to drive your boyfriend wild
229
00:11:46,202 --> 00:11:47,467
by making him jealous.
230
00:11:47,502 --> 00:11:50,701
well, don't tell him about it.
231
00:11:51,934 --> 00:11:54,067
that's why you
don't have a man,
232
00:11:54,102 --> 00:11:57,400
'cause you don't know
what to leave out.
233
00:11:57,435 --> 00:11:59,033
oh, so you leave out the part
234
00:11:59,068 --> 00:12:01,434
where you come crawling back
on your hands and knees.
235
00:12:01,469 --> 00:12:04,067
you really need to start
bleaching your moustache,
236
00:12:04,102 --> 00:12:06,601
it's coming in
a lot darker.
237
00:12:09,035 --> 00:12:10,767
oh, that's
the photographer.
238
00:12:10,802 --> 00:12:13,100
i'll get it.
i'll get the door!
239
00:12:13,135 --> 00:12:15,634
oh, look...
240
00:12:15,669 --> 00:12:16,901
lee eggblad.
241
00:12:16,936 --> 00:12:19,701
oh, eggie,
that psychopath.
242
00:12:19,736 --> 00:12:22,601
- wonder what he's doing now.
- probably 20 to life.
243
00:12:22,636 --> 00:12:24,501
there she is,
your personal favorite.
244
00:12:24,536 --> 00:12:27,067
phyllis "gag me" zimmer.
245
00:12:27,102 --> 00:12:29,734
what a waste of boobs.
246
00:12:29,769 --> 00:12:31,868
i can't believe
dan ever took her out.
247
00:12:33,033 --> 00:12:35,567
he never took her out.
248
00:12:35,602 --> 00:12:38,033
- what?
- when did he take her out?
249
00:12:38,068 --> 00:12:39,801
that week you guys broke up.
250
00:12:39,836 --> 00:12:41,234
no way.
251
00:12:41,269 --> 00:12:43,801
he never told you that?
252
00:12:43,836 --> 00:12:45,968
no.
253
00:12:46,003 --> 00:12:48,234
well-
254
00:12:48,269 --> 00:12:52,133
it wasn't... important.
255
00:12:53,669 --> 00:12:56,868
that's a very pretty dress
you have on.
256
00:13:02,834 --> 00:13:05,767
bob, um, we thought
that... this spot here
257
00:13:05,802 --> 00:13:07,767
would be good for the photo.
258
00:13:07,802 --> 00:13:10,167
oh, yes.
this is nice.
259
00:13:10,202 --> 00:13:13,200
now how many people will be
participating in the photo?
260
00:13:13,235 --> 00:13:15,801
- three children and two adults.
- splendid.
261
00:13:15,836 --> 00:13:16,901
where's becky?
262
00:13:16,936 --> 00:13:19,234
oh, she went upstairs
to change again.
263
00:13:19,269 --> 00:13:21,667
well, go get her. we're
getting ready to start here.
264
00:13:21,702 --> 00:13:23,667
do you have to go
to the bathroom?
265
00:13:23,702 --> 00:13:25,667
- no.
- are you sure?
266
00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:30,634
rosie, this is bob keeler
from flash photo.
267
00:13:30,669 --> 00:13:32,801
- hi, bob.
- hello.
268
00:13:34,567 --> 00:13:37,267
you have a...
lovely home.
269
00:13:37,302 --> 00:13:41,334
thank you. well,
it keeps me off the streets.
270
00:13:41,369 --> 00:13:44,000
you know,
we thought that...
271
00:13:44,035 --> 00:13:46,534
this would be a good spot
for the picture.
272
00:13:46,569 --> 00:13:48,267
hmm. i don't know.
273
00:13:48,302 --> 00:13:50,167
do you think phyllis
will like it?
274
00:13:51,302 --> 00:13:53,167
why should we care
what she thinks?
275
00:13:53,202 --> 00:13:55,934
because 15 years ago,
276
00:13:55,969 --> 00:14:00,100
we dated her behind our back.
277
00:14:00,135 --> 00:14:02,367
what are you talking about?
278
00:14:02,402 --> 00:14:04,968
15 years of lies.
279
00:14:05,003 --> 00:14:06,033
what?
280
00:14:06,068 --> 00:14:07,934
well, uh, we ready here
to start, hmm?
281
00:14:07,969 --> 00:14:09,801
no.
282
00:14:09,836 --> 00:14:13,033
you went out with her and you
didn't even tell me about it.
283
00:14:13,068 --> 00:14:15,334
rosie, bob here is on
a very tight schedule.
284
00:14:15,369 --> 00:14:17,601
can this possibly wait?
285
00:14:17,636 --> 00:14:19,501
another 15 years?
286
00:14:19,536 --> 00:14:21,100
should i leave?
287
00:14:21,135 --> 00:14:23,501
no, bob, you're a man.
288
00:14:23,536 --> 00:14:25,734
let me ask you a question.
289
00:14:25,769 --> 00:14:27,634
do you think
it's a lousy, low-down
290
00:14:27,669 --> 00:14:32,100
sleazebag thing to do to lie
to your own wife for 15 years?
291
00:14:33,302 --> 00:14:35,334
how many years?
292
00:14:35,369 --> 00:14:37,400
as long as we're giving
somebody the third degree,
293
00:14:37,435 --> 00:14:39,734
- let's start with your sister.
- you leave her out of this.
294
00:14:39,769 --> 00:14:41,968
why does she butt her nose
into our business?
295
00:14:42,003 --> 00:14:43,267
hey, it's your fault,
not hers.
296
00:14:43,302 --> 00:14:45,434
- jackie.
- yeah?
297
00:14:45,469 --> 00:14:48,601
you're the one who went out
with phyllis, not her.
298
00:14:48,636 --> 00:14:51,033
- thanks, big mouth.
- what?
299
00:14:51,068 --> 00:14:53,200
you had to blab
about phyllis.
300
00:14:53,235 --> 00:14:56,267
sorry, dan, i thought you
would have told her by now.
301
00:14:56,302 --> 00:14:59,701
there was nothing to tell.
it was one measly date.
302
00:14:59,736 --> 00:15:01,701
if it was so measly,
how come you didn't tell me
303
00:15:01,736 --> 00:15:04,934
- when we first got back together?
- jackie said not to.
304
00:15:04,969 --> 00:15:07,567
so you're the one that's responsible
for keeping me in the dark.
305
00:15:07,602 --> 00:15:09,667
you guys were
already back together.
306
00:15:09,702 --> 00:15:11,100
what's the point
in bringing it up?
307
00:15:11,135 --> 00:15:13,300
yeah, honey,
it was no big deal.
308
00:15:13,335 --> 00:15:15,067
i was trying to protect you.
309
00:15:15,102 --> 00:15:18,667
if it was no big deal, what were
you trying to protect me from?
310
00:15:18,702 --> 00:15:20,634
roseanne, it was
a long time ago.
311
00:15:20,669 --> 00:15:23,834
i gotta get out of here.
i got some better things to do.
312
00:15:26,202 --> 00:15:28,634
come on, rosie,
we got a picture to take.
313
00:15:30,601 --> 00:15:32,501
hey, i just want to know
why you went out with her
314
00:15:32,536 --> 00:15:35,167
- in the first place.
- roseanne, you dumped me.
315
00:15:35,202 --> 00:15:37,267
what was i supposed to do?
316
00:15:37,302 --> 00:15:40,334
go to your grave
wanting me back.
317
00:15:40,369 --> 00:15:42,367
i did want you back.
318
00:15:42,402 --> 00:15:45,601
yeah, well, you got
a funny way of showing it.
319
00:15:45,636 --> 00:15:49,200
- what'd you do on this date?
- nothing.
320
00:15:49,235 --> 00:15:51,667
get more
specific than that.
321
00:15:51,702 --> 00:15:54,634
she hopped on my motorcycle,
we went for a ride.
322
00:15:54,669 --> 00:15:57,067
so, that's all you did.
you just rode around.
323
00:15:57,102 --> 00:15:58,968
- yeah.
- uh-huh, yeah.
324
00:15:59,003 --> 00:16:00,434
and you didn't stop anyplace?
325
00:16:00,469 --> 00:16:03,367
i don't remember.
we just rode around.
326
00:16:03,402 --> 00:16:05,567
just riding, riding,
riding around,
327
00:16:05,602 --> 00:16:07,667
not stopping anywhere.
328
00:16:08,734 --> 00:16:10,934
we might have
stopped someplace.
329
00:16:10,969 --> 00:16:12,234
like where?
330
00:16:12,269 --> 00:16:14,567
- rosie.
- where?
331
00:16:14,602 --> 00:16:17,400
- what difference does it make?
- 'cause i want to know.
332
00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:19,968
watch-out hill.
333
00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:25,701
are we ever
gonna do this?
334
00:16:25,736 --> 00:16:28,567
in a minute.
335
00:16:29,667 --> 00:16:32,167
roseanne,
you broke my heart.
336
00:16:33,934 --> 00:16:35,634
did you do it with her?
337
00:16:36,968 --> 00:16:38,934
come on, roseanne.
338
00:16:38,969 --> 00:16:40,734
did you?
339
00:16:40,769 --> 00:16:43,100
yes.
340
00:16:47,934 --> 00:16:50,067
we're ready when you are.
341
00:16:50,102 --> 00:16:52,400
we may have to do this
another day.
342
00:16:52,435 --> 00:16:54,801
no, we can do it right now.
343
00:16:54,836 --> 00:16:56,200
we'll do it now.
344
00:16:56,235 --> 00:16:57,601
you're sure?
345
00:16:57,636 --> 00:17:00,100
yeah, let's take the picture.
346
00:17:03,934 --> 00:17:05,667
roseanne...
347
00:17:05,702 --> 00:17:08,234
i'm sorry.
348
00:17:22,801 --> 00:17:25,234
the kids are all tucked in.
349
00:17:28,033 --> 00:17:30,501
what you watching?
350
00:17:33,369 --> 00:17:35,334
d.j. was so cute.
351
00:17:35,369 --> 00:17:39,100
he wanted to know if
we're getting a divorce.
352
00:17:39,135 --> 00:17:40,767
are we?
353
00:17:42,901 --> 00:17:45,634
did i forget to tell you
i'm not talking to you?
354
00:17:45,669 --> 00:17:48,667
look, i want to tell you
everything that happened.
355
00:17:48,702 --> 00:17:51,701
you've obviously mistaken me
for someone who cares.
356
00:17:51,736 --> 00:17:54,100
look, when you
broke up with me,
357
00:17:54,135 --> 00:17:56,968
i guess i was trying to
prove something to myself.
358
00:17:57,003 --> 00:17:59,734
i don't know
why i picked phyllis.
359
00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:04,567
okay, i know.
360
00:18:04,602 --> 00:18:06,367
but she just broke up
with her boyfriend.
361
00:18:06,402 --> 00:18:09,100
i ran into her at a party,
we went for a ride,
362
00:18:09,135 --> 00:18:11,000
we wound up on the hill.
363
00:18:11,035 --> 00:18:14,067
and it just sort of happened.
364
00:18:15,234 --> 00:18:17,501
it didn't mean anything.
365
00:18:18,634 --> 00:18:20,167
could you explain that to me?
366
00:18:20,202 --> 00:18:22,801
can you tell me how
you make love with somebody
367
00:18:22,836 --> 00:18:24,901
and it doesn't mean nothing?
368
00:18:24,936 --> 00:18:28,300
well, you start
with a case of beer...
369
00:18:32,300 --> 00:18:33,868
then go get me
a case of beer
370
00:18:33,903 --> 00:18:37,901
so i can shower up
with the chicago bears.
371
00:18:37,936 --> 00:18:42,067
hell, honey, they're not even
a good team anymore.
372
00:18:44,968 --> 00:18:46,434
mean something,
mean something.
373
00:18:46,469 --> 00:18:48,267
why does it always
have to mean something?
374
00:18:48,302 --> 00:18:51,033
i don't know, dan,
i just always thought it did.
375
00:18:51,068 --> 00:18:54,200
look,
what happened that long ago
376
00:18:54,235 --> 00:18:56,334
doesn't have anything to do
with you and me now.
377
00:18:56,369 --> 00:18:58,300
yes, it does.
378
00:18:58,335 --> 00:19:01,367
'cause you're the one person
i thought i could trust.
379
00:19:01,402 --> 00:19:03,000
i still am.
380
00:19:03,035 --> 00:19:05,400
nothing's changed.
381
00:19:05,435 --> 00:19:07,801
then how come
i'm sitting here
382
00:19:07,836 --> 00:19:10,000
wondering what else
i don't know about you?
383
00:19:12,834 --> 00:19:15,567
i'm asking you to trust me.
384
00:19:18,501 --> 00:19:21,734
god, i hate you.
385
00:19:21,769 --> 00:19:24,634
i hate you too, baby.
386
00:19:24,669 --> 00:19:26,267
no one else has ever mattered.
387
00:19:26,302 --> 00:19:30,033
then why'd you go all out
over this picture?
388
00:19:31,402 --> 00:19:34,033
did you think i was
doing this for phyllis?
389
00:19:34,068 --> 00:19:36,634
i was doing this for us.
390
00:19:36,669 --> 00:19:38,501
i'm proud of this family.
391
00:19:38,536 --> 00:19:40,968
i'm proud of the fact that
we've been married 15 years.
392
00:19:41,003 --> 00:19:43,367
do you know
how amazing that is?
393
00:19:43,402 --> 00:19:47,934
yeah, pretty amazing
considering i can't stand you.
394
00:19:47,969 --> 00:19:50,033
everybody said
we got married too young,
395
00:19:50,068 --> 00:19:52,434
that we would never last.
396
00:19:52,469 --> 00:19:54,334
here we are.
397
00:19:54,369 --> 00:19:57,300
what do you suppose
our secret is?
398
00:19:58,767 --> 00:20:02,334
we can't afford
to pay two rents.
399
00:20:02,369 --> 00:20:06,701
hey, give me some
of that there blanket.
400
00:20:06,736 --> 00:20:08,133
no.
401
00:20:08,168 --> 00:20:10,734
come on, i'm freezing.
402
00:20:10,769 --> 00:20:12,467
why don't you
go find old phyllis
403
00:20:12,502 --> 00:20:15,167
to warm up
your big old butt?
404
00:20:15,202 --> 00:20:18,033
'cause nobody can
warm up my big old butt
405
00:20:18,068 --> 00:20:20,667
like you, babycakes.
406
00:20:20,702 --> 00:20:22,868
honey pie.
407
00:20:22,903 --> 00:20:24,701
sugar darling.
408
00:20:24,736 --> 00:20:26,234
snookie baby.
409
00:20:27,502 --> 00:20:29,968
etcetera, etcetera.
410
00:20:31,834 --> 00:20:35,100
this is nice.
411
00:20:43,834 --> 00:20:45,667
these shots turned out
pretty good.
412
00:20:45,702 --> 00:20:47,100
they're not too bad.
413
00:20:47,135 --> 00:20:48,901
i should have worn
my other belt.
414
00:20:48,936 --> 00:20:50,734
if you say one more word
about that belt,
415
00:20:50,769 --> 00:20:52,334
i'm going to
strangle you with it.
416
00:20:52,369 --> 00:20:54,300
i don't look
so bad in these.
417
00:20:54,335 --> 00:20:56,234
you're not too ugly.
418
00:20:56,269 --> 00:20:57,901
in fact,
i look pretty good.
419
00:20:57,936 --> 00:20:59,734
can i take this one
to school?
420
00:20:59,769 --> 00:21:01,167
sure.
421
00:21:01,202 --> 00:21:04,167
darlene's blocking my
softball trophy in that one.
422
00:21:04,202 --> 00:21:07,000
this is the one we want to
send in to the yearbook.
423
00:21:07,035 --> 00:21:10,367
no way! my eyes
are all closed up.
424
00:21:10,402 --> 00:21:11,868
let's send in that one.
425
00:21:11,903 --> 00:21:13,868
huh-uh...
426
00:21:13,903 --> 00:21:15,567
i'm making a face
in that one.
427
00:21:15,602 --> 00:21:17,934
no, that's your regular face.
428
00:21:17,969 --> 00:21:20,133
i don't look like that.
429
00:21:20,168 --> 00:21:21,567
yeah, you do.
430
00:21:21,602 --> 00:21:23,067
well, we're not
sending in that one.
431
00:21:23,102 --> 00:21:24,667
well, we're not sending
the other one.
432
00:21:24,702 --> 00:21:26,534
- well, what are we gonna do?
- well...
433
00:21:26,569 --> 00:21:28,801
there's always yellowstone.
434
00:21:29,801 --> 00:21:39,801
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