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1
00:00:35,082 --> 00:00:36,417
Come on.
2
00:00:36,484 --> 00:00:38,752
How long's it take to find
your kid a Halloween costume?
3
00:00:38,820 --> 00:00:40,521
Quit rushin' me, man.
You're the one
4
00:00:40,588 --> 00:00:42,589
who took 20 minutes
smelling shampoos.
5
00:00:42,657 --> 00:00:44,925
Let's go!
6
00:00:44,992 --> 00:00:46,692
I'm trying. He wants
to be a superhero
7
00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:48,994
and there are no
black superheroes.
8
00:00:50,063 --> 00:00:51,096
How about this:
9
00:00:51,164 --> 00:00:52,799
Get him a leather
coat, a turtleneck,
10
00:00:52,866 --> 00:00:54,066
let him go as shaft?
11
00:00:55,903 --> 00:00:58,504
I can't have my kid be
shaft for Halloween.
12
00:00:58,571 --> 00:01:00,071
He can't be the
black private dick
13
00:01:00,139 --> 00:01:02,007
that's a sex machine
to all the chicks?
14
00:01:02,075 --> 00:01:03,108
He's 6.
15
00:01:04,110 --> 00:01:05,110
Whatever.
16
00:01:10,682 --> 00:01:12,216
And how many kids
are you expecting
17
00:01:12,284 --> 00:01:13,617
to come to your house?
18
00:01:13,685 --> 00:01:15,519
This isn't for the kids.
This is for me.
19
00:01:16,121 --> 00:01:17,421
So if that's all for you,
20
00:01:17,489 --> 00:01:19,555
what do your trick-or-treaters
get, the finger?
21
00:01:19,624 --> 00:01:20,790
Nah.
22
00:01:20,858 --> 00:01:22,391
We usually just
shut the lights out
23
00:01:22,459 --> 00:01:24,260
and pretend we're not home.
24
00:01:24,328 --> 00:01:26,930
Does that mean Carrie's gotta take an
occasional egg to the back of the head?
25
00:01:26,998 --> 00:01:29,032
Sure. But you know what?
The trade-off's worth it.
26
00:01:29,100 --> 00:01:31,233
Come on, man. My kid wants
to come to your house
27
00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:33,168
to trick-or-treat.
Can't you do something
28
00:01:33,236 --> 00:01:35,203
to make the place look
a little halloweenish?
29
00:01:35,271 --> 00:01:36,805
I mean, get a pumpkin at least.
Damn.
30
00:01:36,873 --> 00:01:38,641
If it'll shut you up,
I'll get a pumpkin.
31
00:01:38,708 --> 00:01:39,742
That's all?
32
00:01:39,809 --> 00:01:41,309
6 bucks?
33
00:01:41,377 --> 00:01:43,645
It's an orange
vegetable with a dent.
34
00:01:45,113 --> 00:01:46,180
So could we go, already?
35
00:01:46,248 --> 00:01:47,815
All right, all right. Ooh!
36
00:01:47,883 --> 00:01:49,784
I'll just give him Darth Vader.
37
00:01:49,852 --> 00:01:50,952
I mean, he's black, right?
38
00:01:51,020 --> 00:01:53,187
And James Earl Jones
did his voice.
39
00:01:53,255 --> 00:01:56,823
But wait when his mask finally
comes off, he's a white guy.
40
00:01:56,891 --> 00:01:57,924
What do you think?
41
00:01:57,926 --> 00:02:00,260
Let's go!
42
00:02:19,712 --> 00:02:21,345
Hey, how's it goin'?
43
00:02:21,881 --> 00:02:23,014
What is that?
44
00:02:23,081 --> 00:02:24,148
Oh, boy.
45
00:02:24,983 --> 00:02:26,651
It's a pumpkin.
46
00:02:26,719 --> 00:02:28,152
What is it doing in this house?
47
00:02:28,220 --> 00:02:29,453
Dad...
48
00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:31,655
It's a Halloween thing for the kids.
What are you...
49
00:02:33,858 --> 00:02:35,893
There will be no
Halloween in this house!
50
00:02:35,961 --> 00:02:38,128
You understand? It's forbidden.
51
00:02:38,196 --> 00:02:39,696
Forbidden!
52
00:02:43,667 --> 00:02:45,768
What the hell was that?
53
00:02:45,836 --> 00:02:47,904
Nothing. He just hates Halloween.
That's all.
54
00:02:47,971 --> 00:02:50,238
Yes, I gleaned that.
55
00:02:50,306 --> 00:02:52,707
It doesn't give him the right
to smash my pumpkin, does it?
56
00:02:52,775 --> 00:02:54,743
Does it? All right! Calm down.
57
00:02:54,811 --> 00:02:57,278
It's a pumpkin, not
your entenmann's cake.
58
00:02:59,449 --> 00:03:02,716
We never do Halloween, anyway.
Why do you care so much?
59
00:03:02,784 --> 00:03:05,286
I don't. I just got it 'cause
Deacon's bringin' Kirby over.
60
00:03:05,354 --> 00:03:06,888
Now I gotta go get another one.
61
00:03:06,955 --> 00:03:08,356
And maybe an entenmann's cake.
62
00:03:08,423 --> 00:03:09,857
Whoa... whoa... whoa... whoa!
63
00:03:09,925 --> 00:03:11,392
Don't get another pumpkin, Doug.
64
00:03:11,459 --> 00:03:12,693
Why not? Just don't.
65
00:03:12,761 --> 00:03:16,363
Why? Why? 'Cause it's
forbidden by wrinkles McGee?
66
00:03:16,430 --> 00:03:18,431
Why do you wanna
upset him so much?
67
00:03:18,499 --> 00:03:20,367
I mean, Kirby can see
a pumpkin anywhere.
68
00:03:20,434 --> 00:03:22,535
This town is stupid
with pumpkins.
69
00:03:22,603 --> 00:03:23,836
That's not the point, ok?
70
00:03:23,905 --> 00:03:26,071
I'm sick of him and his
forbidding things.
71
00:03:26,139 --> 00:03:28,540
First, we can only buy
an American-made v.C.R.
72
00:03:28,608 --> 00:03:31,176
Hey, the dugan-Edwards
works pretty well.
73
00:03:33,113 --> 00:03:34,346
Oh, yeah, it's great
74
00:03:34,414 --> 00:03:36,380
if you don't need it
to "rewind" or "play."
75
00:03:38,150 --> 00:03:39,650
Let's not forget:
76
00:03:39,718 --> 00:03:42,720
No red pens, no soft cheese,
no mention of f.D.R.'S polio.
77
00:03:42,788 --> 00:03:44,455
All right, so he's
got some quirks.
78
00:03:44,523 --> 00:03:46,357
Suddenly, this is news to you?
79
00:03:46,425 --> 00:03:47,691
I'm just sick of it, Carrie.
80
00:03:47,758 --> 00:03:49,927
You know, at some point,
someone's gotta take a stand
81
00:03:49,994 --> 00:03:51,695
against that lunatic,
and you know what?
82
00:03:51,762 --> 00:03:53,663
I'm takin' that stand.
I'm gettin' a pumpkin.
83
00:03:53,731 --> 00:03:54,798
Oh, so that's your stand?
84
00:03:54,866 --> 00:03:56,099
Your big stand is for Halloween?
85
00:03:56,167 --> 00:03:57,167
That's right.
86
00:03:57,235 --> 00:03:58,767
World hunger, no, but...
but Halloween,
87
00:03:58,836 --> 00:03:59,836
that's your cause?
88
00:03:59,903 --> 00:04:01,137
They're both important.
89
00:04:01,205 --> 00:04:03,472
Right now, I'm
focusing on Halloween.
90
00:04:03,540 --> 00:04:05,407
Doug, honey, I am begging you.
91
00:04:05,475 --> 00:04:07,809
You've gotta pick your
battles with my father.
92
00:04:07,877 --> 00:04:09,544
This is not worth fighting for.
93
00:04:11,213 --> 00:04:12,446
Fine.
94
00:04:15,684 --> 00:04:17,451
Fun-sized kit-kats.
95
00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:19,521
Also forbidden!
96
00:04:29,597 --> 00:04:32,398
Costume-shopping
twice in one week.
97
00:04:32,466 --> 00:04:36,302
If this is a dream,
do not wake me up.
98
00:04:36,370 --> 00:04:38,838
Give me a break, will ya?
Darth Vader made him cry.
99
00:04:38,906 --> 00:04:40,373
Too scary.
100
00:04:40,440 --> 00:04:41,774
I hear that.
101
00:04:41,842 --> 00:04:43,442
By the way, don't
bother bringin' him
102
00:04:43,510 --> 00:04:44,910
by the house this year. Why not?
103
00:04:44,978 --> 00:04:46,345
Stupid Arthur
smashed the pumpkin
104
00:04:46,412 --> 00:04:47,746
all over our backyard.
105
00:04:47,813 --> 00:04:49,047
Huge mess.
106
00:04:49,115 --> 00:04:50,349
Plus the neighborhood cats
107
00:04:50,383 --> 00:04:53,218
are takin' their sweet-ass
time lickin' it up.
108
00:04:53,285 --> 00:04:55,786
He smashed the pumpkin?
What's that guy's problem?
109
00:04:55,854 --> 00:04:58,488
Apparently, he's forbidden
Halloween in my house.
110
00:04:58,556 --> 00:05:00,624
Man, I've never understood
how you let someone
111
00:05:00,692 --> 00:05:02,626
push you around who's
just sponging off you
112
00:05:02,694 --> 00:05:03,694
in the first place.
113
00:05:03,762 --> 00:05:05,095
Oh, I'm gettin' pushed around?
114
00:05:05,163 --> 00:05:06,595
You're the one who's runnin'
115
00:05:06,664 --> 00:05:08,564
back and forth to a drugstore
trying to find a costume
116
00:05:08,632 --> 00:05:10,066
for someone who, let's face it,
117
00:05:10,134 --> 00:05:11,600
is totally spongin' off of you.
118
00:05:11,669 --> 00:05:13,636
You mean my kid?
119
00:05:13,671 --> 00:05:16,139
That's right. Cold glass
of water, isn't it?
120
00:05:16,207 --> 00:05:18,240
Ok, first of all, Kirby's
in grade school.
121
00:05:18,308 --> 00:05:20,376
And second, he actually
doesn't sponge off of us.
122
00:05:20,443 --> 00:05:22,378
He does a lot to help
out around the house.
123
00:05:22,445 --> 00:05:23,912
Like what?
124
00:05:23,980 --> 00:05:26,281
Cleans his room, makes his
bed, rinses his dinner plates.
125
00:05:26,349 --> 00:05:27,816
He does? Yeah.
126
00:05:27,884 --> 00:05:30,851
Son of a mother!
127
00:05:30,919 --> 00:05:32,320
Arthur doesn't do any of that.
128
00:05:32,388 --> 00:05:34,855
I mean, the guy contributes
nothing to our house,
129
00:05:34,923 --> 00:05:37,758
except the smell of
brylcreem and old.
130
00:05:39,928 --> 00:05:42,428
Man, he is wearin'
me like a sombrero.
131
00:05:44,598 --> 00:05:46,099
Black power ranger.
132
00:05:46,167 --> 00:05:47,901
I guess I'll give this a shot.
133
00:05:57,978 --> 00:06:00,045
A little witchy-witch action.
134
00:06:00,113 --> 00:06:02,815
♪ Witchy tah
135
00:06:02,882 --> 00:06:04,949
you, my friend, can
go right over here.
136
00:06:05,017 --> 00:06:08,452
Oh, 'cause we are takin' back
the house tonight. Slim, huh?
137
00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:09,553
Yeah!
138
00:06:14,458 --> 00:06:15,692
Trick or treat.
139
00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:17,761
Hey, my first customer!
140
00:06:17,829 --> 00:06:19,563
Who are you supposed
to be there, kirb?
141
00:06:19,631 --> 00:06:20,997
A powerpuff girl.
142
00:06:22,933 --> 00:06:24,334
We, uh,
143
00:06:24,401 --> 00:06:27,069
fo-fought about this
for 7 straight hours.
144
00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:28,837
Which powerpuff
girl are you, kirb?
145
00:06:28,939 --> 00:06:30,038
Blossom.
146
00:06:31,541 --> 00:06:33,008
Blossom?
147
00:06:33,076 --> 00:06:34,577
Cool.
148
00:06:34,611 --> 00:06:36,312
All right, well, here
you go, blossom.
149
00:06:36,380 --> 00:06:39,247
Take whatever you like.
150
00:06:39,315 --> 00:06:41,649
A... a Mary Jane, Kirby?
Take the 3 musketeers.
151
00:06:41,717 --> 00:06:42,884
I want a Mary Jane.
152
00:06:42,952 --> 00:06:45,053
No. No. He wants the
three musketeers.
153
00:06:45,121 --> 00:06:46,721
3 men in tights?
154
00:06:46,789 --> 00:06:48,689
Feels like a lateral move, Deac.
155
00:06:48,756 --> 00:06:49,790
Thanks.
156
00:06:50,925 --> 00:06:51,993
Hello?
157
00:06:52,060 --> 00:06:53,060
It's Arthur. I gotta go.
158
00:06:53,128 --> 00:06:54,128
Yeah. Come on, Kirby
159
00:06:54,196 --> 00:06:55,196
Bye.
160
00:06:55,263 --> 00:06:56,297
See you later.
161
00:06:58,533 --> 00:07:00,433
It's showtime.
162
00:07:01,602 --> 00:07:02,768
Hey, Arthur.
163
00:07:04,338 --> 00:07:05,372
Hello, Douglas.
164
00:07:05,439 --> 00:07:06,939
Hey, look, if you've
gotta second,
165
00:07:07,008 --> 00:07:09,175
you might want to mosey
on into the living room.
166
00:07:09,243 --> 00:07:10,410
What for?
167
00:07:10,478 --> 00:07:12,378
'Cause I just think there's
somethin' in there
168
00:07:12,445 --> 00:07:13,845
that might interest ya. Come on.
169
00:07:34,032 --> 00:07:36,399
Hey, I like your costume.
170
00:07:36,467 --> 00:07:38,334
Huh?
171
00:07:38,402 --> 00:07:40,203
I.P.S. Driver. That's hilarious.
172
00:07:40,271 --> 00:07:42,105
Hey, if you really
want to be convincing,
173
00:07:42,173 --> 00:07:44,407
make sure your candy gets
to the kids 3 days late.
174
00:07:44,475 --> 00:07:46,108
Right.
175
00:07:50,379 --> 00:07:52,681
Doug, how's my dad?
Is everything ok?
176
00:07:52,749 --> 00:07:54,149
Yeah, he's fine. He's fine, ok?
177
00:07:54,217 --> 00:07:56,085
The doctor's in there
now checking him out.
178
00:07:56,152 --> 00:07:59,220
He had what they called,
uh, a heart ischemia.
179
00:07:59,287 --> 00:08:01,089
A heart ischemia?
180
00:08:01,156 --> 00:08:02,890
What the hell is that?
Did he tell you?
181
00:08:02,958 --> 00:08:04,792
Yeah. Yeah. He said
it's not that serious.
182
00:08:04,860 --> 00:08:08,562
It's just when the heart
a-a-and the ischemia part
183
00:08:08,629 --> 00:08:10,263
of the heart...
184
00:08:10,331 --> 00:08:14,033
It doesn't throb in
the traditional...
185
00:08:14,669 --> 00:08:16,269
I don't know.
186
00:08:16,337 --> 00:08:18,905
Would you listen when
the man talks to you?
187
00:08:18,973 --> 00:08:20,105
Hi. I'm Dr. Davis.
188
00:08:20,173 --> 00:08:21,674
Are you Mr. Spooner's daughter?
189
00:08:21,741 --> 00:08:23,709
Yes. Is... is he ok? Is
everything all right?
190
00:08:23,844 --> 00:08:25,110
Yes. Your father's
stable right now.
191
00:08:25,178 --> 00:08:26,812
His condition isn't
life-threatening,
192
00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:28,915
but we are going to keep
him here to run some tests
193
00:08:28,982 --> 00:08:30,315
tomorrow just so we can find out
194
00:08:30,383 --> 00:08:32,083
exactly what's going on.
195
00:08:32,151 --> 00:08:33,852
Ok, do you know what
could have caused this?
196
00:08:33,920 --> 00:08:34,986
Oh, for God's sake, Carrie,
197
00:08:35,054 --> 00:08:36,654
there's no reason to
live in the past.
198
00:08:36,723 --> 00:08:38,323
Whatever happened, happened.
199
00:08:38,390 --> 00:08:40,224
Just shut up. I wanna know.
200
00:08:40,292 --> 00:08:41,359
What... what could've caused it?
201
00:08:41,427 --> 00:08:42,826
Probably salt or
somethin', right?
202
00:08:42,894 --> 00:08:44,595
I mean, the man
likes his pickles.
203
00:08:44,662 --> 00:08:46,463
Well, these things are
usually brought on
204
00:08:46,531 --> 00:08:48,099
by some sort of shock
to the system.
205
00:08:48,166 --> 00:08:50,201
Actually, he said his son-in-law
206
00:08:50,268 --> 00:08:51,735
tried to scare him to death.
207
00:08:53,403 --> 00:08:54,770
Anyhow, he's awake now,
208
00:08:54,838 --> 00:08:56,873
so you can head on
in and say hello.
209
00:08:56,941 --> 00:08:57,941
Ok.
210
00:09:04,381 --> 00:09:06,214
Doctors.
211
00:09:06,282 --> 00:09:07,982
They think they're God.
212
00:09:11,187 --> 00:09:12,487
What'd you do, Doug?
213
00:09:12,555 --> 00:09:13,755
Nothing. Doug!
214
00:09:13,823 --> 00:09:15,824
I put up a few Halloween decorations.
That's all.
215
00:09:15,892 --> 00:09:17,825
Your father walked in,
he saw a paper ghost
216
00:09:17,893 --> 00:09:18,926
and he just dropped!
217
00:09:18,994 --> 00:09:20,127
Oh, my God.
218
00:09:20,195 --> 00:09:21,495
Carrie, it was a paper ghost.
219
00:09:21,563 --> 00:09:23,564
He might as well have been
scared by an envelope.
220
00:09:23,631 --> 00:09:26,967
I asked you not to push him
on this Halloween thing.
221
00:09:27,035 --> 00:09:28,602
Why couldn't you just let it go?
222
00:09:28,669 --> 00:09:31,170
Because it's my house, ok?
And he doesn't respect that.
223
00:09:31,238 --> 00:09:33,406
The... the man doesn't
even rinse his dishes.
224
00:09:33,474 --> 00:09:34,741
Neither do you.
225
00:09:35,710 --> 00:09:37,143
I do.
226
00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:38,677
I did that time.
227
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:44,182
Hi, daddy.
228
00:09:44,250 --> 00:09:45,784
How you doin'?
229
00:09:47,020 --> 00:09:48,253
Been better.
230
00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:50,087
I know.
231
00:09:50,155 --> 00:09:51,589
But you're gonna be fine.
232
00:09:51,657 --> 00:09:53,590
Listen, can you do
me a little favor?
233
00:09:53,658 --> 00:09:55,192
Sure.
234
00:09:55,260 --> 00:09:57,195
Could you go through
my address book
235
00:09:57,262 --> 00:09:59,631
and call all my friends
and my loved ones?
236
00:09:59,698 --> 00:10:00,765
Don't alarm them.
237
00:10:00,832 --> 00:10:03,633
Just bring them up to
speed on my predicament.
238
00:10:03,701 --> 00:10:05,035
Sure.
239
00:10:05,102 --> 00:10:06,570
Anything else?
240
00:10:06,637 --> 00:10:08,171
I'd love a pack of sen-sen
241
00:10:08,238 --> 00:10:09,906
and the latest issue of gent.
242
00:10:11,275 --> 00:10:13,109
Ok, I don't know
243
00:10:13,177 --> 00:10:15,011
what either of those things are,
244
00:10:15,078 --> 00:10:17,246
but I will do my best.
245
00:10:17,314 --> 00:10:18,714
Ok, get some rest.
246
00:10:19,650 --> 00:10:21,217
I love you.
247
00:10:21,285 --> 00:10:23,319
I'm just gonna talk to
him for a couple secs.
248
00:10:23,386 --> 00:10:24,419
Be nice. I will.
249
00:10:34,797 --> 00:10:36,463
All right, Arthur, I get it.
250
00:10:36,531 --> 00:10:37,998
Cold shoulder, ok?
251
00:10:38,066 --> 00:10:39,800
Look, I... I feel
bad, all right?
252
00:10:39,867 --> 00:10:43,637
I'm sorry I made you have a heart...
Thing.
253
00:10:44,906 --> 00:10:46,206
I'm... I'm sorry.
254
00:10:47,273 --> 00:10:49,475
Arthur, I'm apologizing to you.
255
00:10:49,543 --> 00:10:51,110
You know? But you gotta admit,
256
00:10:51,178 --> 00:10:53,512
you went a little insane over
some Halloween decorations...
257
00:10:53,580 --> 00:10:56,148
All right.
258
00:10:56,216 --> 00:10:58,416
You just can't keep doing things like...
would you stop?
259
00:10:58,484 --> 00:10:59,818
Could you please stop moving?
260
00:10:59,886 --> 00:11:02,020
Arthur. All right, forget it!
Ok, forget it.
261
00:11:02,088 --> 00:11:04,189
I tried to talk to you, but
you just won't listen,
262
00:11:04,257 --> 00:11:05,957
so, you know, I'm
outta here, ok?
263
00:11:06,659 --> 00:11:08,493
Douglas!
264
00:11:08,561 --> 00:11:09,693
Yeah.
265
00:11:09,761 --> 00:11:11,495
Did I ever tell you
about my father?
266
00:11:14,098 --> 00:11:15,533
No.
267
00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:18,102
The man was a rotten gambler.
268
00:11:18,170 --> 00:11:20,871
Oh, sure, once in a while
he'd stumble on a winner
269
00:11:20,938 --> 00:11:22,605
and toss a nickel my way.
270
00:11:22,673 --> 00:11:24,040
Before he could change his mind,
271
00:11:24,108 --> 00:11:25,408
I'd run down to Gabe's pizzeria
272
00:11:25,476 --> 00:11:27,777
for some lemon ices.
273
00:11:27,878 --> 00:11:31,348
Nothing ever tasted better.
274
00:11:31,415 --> 00:11:32,914
You ever been to Gabe's?
275
00:11:32,982 --> 00:11:34,516
It's a Bronx landmark.
276
00:11:34,584 --> 00:11:35,985
Gabe's pizzeria?
277
00:11:36,052 --> 00:11:37,752
I... I don't think so.
278
00:11:37,820 --> 00:11:39,221
They have a picture of a chimp
279
00:11:39,288 --> 00:11:41,623
with a big Italian
moustache in the window.
280
00:11:42,992 --> 00:11:44,192
It's hilarious.
281
00:11:44,260 --> 00:11:45,626
Ok. All right.
282
00:11:45,694 --> 00:11:49,263
You do understand chimps don't
usually have moustaches?
283
00:11:50,532 --> 00:11:52,533
I get the funny. I just, uh...
284
00:11:52,601 --> 00:11:54,669
Wh-where... where are you
goin' with this, Arthur?
285
00:11:54,736 --> 00:11:58,705
Well, as I said, my
father was usually broke.
286
00:11:58,772 --> 00:12:02,308
One Halloween, when I was 8,
things were especially bad.
287
00:12:02,376 --> 00:12:04,577
It looked like we
might go hungry.
288
00:12:04,645 --> 00:12:06,245
In those days, on Halloween,
289
00:12:06,312 --> 00:12:08,214
people would give out
apples and cakes,
290
00:12:08,281 --> 00:12:11,483
and sometimes, even a penny.
291
00:12:11,518 --> 00:12:14,153
My father made me go
trick-or-treating
292
00:12:14,221 --> 00:12:16,989
till my feet were numb.
293
00:12:17,057 --> 00:12:19,457
I had to change
costumes a few times
294
00:12:19,525 --> 00:12:21,226
so I could repeat houses.
295
00:12:23,629 --> 00:12:25,963
But the neighbors knew.
296
00:12:26,031 --> 00:12:27,565
I tell you, Douglas,
297
00:12:27,733 --> 00:12:30,534
it doesn't feel
good to be pitied.
298
00:12:30,602 --> 00:12:33,737
So you'll forgive me if
I don't share your love
299
00:12:33,805 --> 00:12:36,640
for a holiday called Halloween.
300
00:12:40,144 --> 00:12:41,644
I'm feelin' a little punk.
301
00:12:43,180 --> 00:12:44,647
Good night.
302
00:13:01,764 --> 00:13:03,931
So you knew that's why
he hated Halloween?
303
00:13:03,999 --> 00:13:05,166
Why didn't you tell me?
304
00:13:05,233 --> 00:13:06,233
It's a horrible story.
305
00:13:06,301 --> 00:13:07,701
I didn't want to embarrass him.
306
00:13:07,769 --> 00:13:09,803
Now you don't want
to embarrass him?
307
00:13:09,871 --> 00:13:11,505
Last week you sent me down there
308
00:13:11,573 --> 00:13:14,540
to apply ointment to
his inflamed area.
309
00:13:16,577 --> 00:13:17,743
This is different.
310
00:13:17,811 --> 00:13:20,480
I didn't think I had to
tell you a tragic story
311
00:13:20,548 --> 00:13:22,715
to keep you from trying
to make his heart stop.
312
00:13:22,850 --> 00:13:24,583
It was a paper ghost.
313
00:13:24,651 --> 00:13:26,417
Here, is this scary to you?
Look!
314
00:13:26,485 --> 00:13:29,354
It's wavin' at ya. "How-do?"
315
00:13:29,421 --> 00:13:32,090
Ok, well, why doesn't he "how-do"
in the garbage? All right?
316
00:13:32,158 --> 00:13:35,093
Now I gotta start makin'
these calls for my dad.
317
00:13:35,161 --> 00:13:36,694
I just...
318
00:13:36,763 --> 00:13:38,763
I feel so bad.
319
00:13:38,830 --> 00:13:40,231
I mean, all these years
320
00:13:40,298 --> 00:13:41,632
I thought Arthur
was being insane
321
00:13:41,699 --> 00:13:43,367
just to annoy me.
322
00:13:43,434 --> 00:13:45,269
Never thought that
things in his life
323
00:13:45,336 --> 00:13:47,071
actually made him that way.
324
00:13:47,139 --> 00:13:49,205
Oh, God, I can't get that
image out of my mind
325
00:13:49,273 --> 00:13:51,407
of little Arthur
in his beanie hat
326
00:13:51,475 --> 00:13:53,076
running down to that
Gabe's pizzeria
327
00:13:53,144 --> 00:13:54,244
with a nickel in his hand.
328
00:13:54,312 --> 00:13:56,513
Lemon ices!
329
00:13:58,416 --> 00:13:59,982
All right, he sounds
like that now.
330
00:14:00,049 --> 00:14:02,318
I don't think he
did when he was 8.
331
00:14:05,788 --> 00:14:07,022
Where are you goin'?
332
00:14:07,090 --> 00:14:08,324
I need some air.
333
00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:14,562
Uh, hello. Uh, is
this dottie greco?
334
00:14:14,629 --> 00:14:17,898
Hi. Yeah. I have some
not-so-good news, um,
335
00:14:17,966 --> 00:14:20,168
about your friend
Arthur Spooner.
336
00:14:20,235 --> 00:14:23,269
Yeah. He's in the hospital
with a minor heart problem.
337
00:14:23,337 --> 00:14:25,539
He's not in any... huh?
338
00:14:26,574 --> 00:14:27,940
Uh, no.
339
00:14:28,008 --> 00:14:30,010
I don't know if he still
has your redd foxx album.
340
00:14:30,111 --> 00:14:33,280
But that's not really
why I was calling.
341
00:14:33,347 --> 00:14:35,581
No, I'm not gonna
go look for it now.
342
00:14:35,649 --> 00:14:37,683
I'm trying to tell you
something that...
343
00:14:38,318 --> 00:14:39,519
Hello?
344
00:14:44,725 --> 00:14:45,723
Ok, please tell me
345
00:14:45,791 --> 00:14:47,259
that was the right
Gabe's pizzeria.
346
00:14:47,326 --> 00:14:48,826
Nope. The guy said
347
00:14:48,894 --> 00:14:50,762
he's only been in
business since '83.
348
00:14:50,829 --> 00:14:53,432
F.Y.I.: Danny aiello's
had a slice there.
349
00:14:53,499 --> 00:14:55,267
All right, so where's
the next Gabe's?
350
00:14:55,334 --> 00:14:56,867
All right, the next one is
351
00:14:56,935 --> 00:14:59,370
"original Gabe's, 2850
kingsbridge road."
352
00:14:59,437 --> 00:15:00,604
There's an original Gabe's?
353
00:15:00,671 --> 00:15:02,572
Why the hell didn't we
start with that one?
354
00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:04,174
Because there's 4
original Gabe's.
355
00:15:04,242 --> 00:15:05,575
Can't we just go to any of them?
356
00:15:05,643 --> 00:15:07,378
No! I gotta get him lemon ices
357
00:15:07,445 --> 00:15:09,245
from the same place
he got 'em as a kid!
358
00:15:09,313 --> 00:15:10,446
I owe it to him.
359
00:15:10,514 --> 00:15:12,415
It's the least I can do for
almost killin' the guy.
360
00:15:12,482 --> 00:15:14,050
A Buck's worth of lemon ices?
361
00:15:14,118 --> 00:15:15,885
Actually, that is the
least you can do.
362
00:15:15,953 --> 00:15:18,054
You know what? You said
you'd help, all right?
363
00:15:18,122 --> 00:15:20,555
You don't wanna help,
I'll take you home.
364
00:15:20,623 --> 00:15:22,924
I don't feel like bein'
home right now anyway.
365
00:15:22,992 --> 00:15:25,293
This thing with Kirby's
got me kinda rattled.
366
00:15:25,361 --> 00:15:26,795
I'm afraid I'll walk in the door
367
00:15:26,863 --> 00:15:28,429
and he'll be wearing a girdle.
368
00:15:28,497 --> 00:15:29,931
Hey, take it easy, all right?
369
00:15:29,999 --> 00:15:31,932
Just 'cause he wants
to be a girl superhero
370
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:33,333
doesn't mean he's gay.
371
00:15:33,401 --> 00:15:35,136
You know they say
that most drag queens
372
00:15:35,203 --> 00:15:37,704
are actually straight?
373
00:15:37,773 --> 00:15:39,774
That's supposed to
make me feel better?
374
00:15:40,809 --> 00:15:41,841
A little.
375
00:15:42,609 --> 00:15:44,677
Arthur Spooner.
376
00:15:44,745 --> 00:15:49,082
S-p-o-o-n-e-r.
377
00:15:49,217 --> 00:15:50,717
Same name as you!
378
00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:55,654
Oh, now, come on.
Don't say that.
379
00:15:55,721 --> 00:15:58,524
That's not nice at all.
380
00:15:58,591 --> 00:16:00,492
Trick or treat!
381
00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:03,728
Oh, what great costumes.
382
00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:05,496
Listen, the man might die,
383
00:16:05,564 --> 00:16:07,798
then how would you feel, huh?
384
00:16:07,866 --> 00:16:09,334
What are you, a witch?
385
00:16:09,401 --> 00:16:10,501
Scary.
386
00:16:10,569 --> 00:16:13,071
Oh, you would, too,
give a rat's ass!
387
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:18,708
Stuart little right
here in my house.
388
00:16:18,776 --> 00:16:20,143
Oh, would you stop your whining?
389
00:16:20,211 --> 00:16:21,979
He taught me to
swim the same way.
390
00:16:22,046 --> 00:16:23,746
It's called tough
love, you idiot.
391
00:16:23,814 --> 00:16:25,148
Happy Halloween.
392
00:16:31,722 --> 00:16:32,921
Was that it?
393
00:16:32,989 --> 00:16:35,991
Nope. That was Gabe's
oriental massage.
394
00:16:36,059 --> 00:16:37,226
F.Y.I.:
395
00:16:37,294 --> 00:16:38,627
Danny aiello's been there, too.
396
00:16:41,997 --> 00:16:43,264
Ok, you know what?
397
00:16:43,332 --> 00:16:44,765
Just send your
ex-business partner
398
00:16:44,833 --> 00:16:46,033
a friggin' card, ok?
399
00:16:47,436 --> 00:16:48,403
Get a pen.
400
00:16:48,471 --> 00:16:51,037
Never mind who this is.
Get a pen!
401
00:16:52,340 --> 00:16:54,141
Trick or treat!
402
00:16:54,209 --> 00:16:55,875
I'm gonna need about 15 minutes.
403
00:17:08,022 --> 00:17:09,588
I told you we'd find it.
404
00:17:09,656 --> 00:17:11,024
Feel kinda stupid now, don't ya?
405
00:17:11,091 --> 00:17:13,691
Actually, I stopped
caring 5 gabes ago.
406
00:17:13,759 --> 00:17:14,993
Hey, how you doin'?
407
00:17:15,061 --> 00:17:16,928
A pint of lemon ices, please.
408
00:17:16,996 --> 00:17:18,063
We're closed.
409
00:17:18,131 --> 00:17:20,032
You know what? We're
headed right back out
410
00:17:20,099 --> 00:17:21,933
as soon as you hook
us up with some ices.
411
00:17:22,001 --> 00:17:23,635
Lem-eon-eonee-on!
412
00:17:23,702 --> 00:17:24,835
Buddy, do me a favor.
413
00:17:24,903 --> 00:17:26,803
I already z'd out the register.
414
00:17:26,871 --> 00:17:28,406
He already z'd out the register.
415
00:17:28,473 --> 00:17:29,740
Hey! Ok, would you, please?
416
00:17:29,807 --> 00:17:31,275
Look, here... Here's the deal.
417
00:17:31,343 --> 00:17:33,044
There's an old man
418
00:17:33,111 --> 00:17:35,412
who used to come to this
place when he was a kid,
419
00:17:35,479 --> 00:17:37,914
and eating these lemon ices
was the one bright spot
420
00:17:37,981 --> 00:17:40,149
in his whole rotten childhood.
421
00:17:40,217 --> 00:17:43,086
That man is lying in a bed
right now in a hospital
422
00:17:43,988 --> 00:17:45,888
with a heart ischemia.
423
00:17:46,890 --> 00:17:49,058
That's right, a heart ischemia.
424
00:17:50,459 --> 00:17:52,627
What do you say, friend, huh?
Come on.
425
00:17:54,297 --> 00:17:56,732
I had a heart ischemia.
426
00:17:56,799 --> 00:17:57,933
It ain't that bad.
427
00:17:59,968 --> 00:18:02,002
I'm beggin' ya. One cup of ices.
428
00:18:02,070 --> 00:18:03,070
I said no!
429
00:18:03,138 --> 00:18:04,572
Try pathmark.
430
00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:06,441
Come on. Let's just
go to pathmark.
431
00:18:06,508 --> 00:18:08,843
I need sucrets anyway. I
think I'm gettin' sick.
432
00:18:10,778 --> 00:18:11,845
All right.
433
00:18:11,912 --> 00:18:13,980
The dumpster's all
the way down there.
434
00:18:14,048 --> 00:18:15,449
What are you doin'?
435
00:18:15,516 --> 00:18:17,451
I'm gettin' my father-in-law
some lemon ices.
436
00:18:17,518 --> 00:18:19,919
What the hell are you doin', man?
That-that's stealing.
437
00:18:19,987 --> 00:18:22,455
Not if I leave him
20 bucks, it's not.
438
00:18:22,522 --> 00:18:24,022
You'll spot me 20?
439
00:18:24,090 --> 00:18:25,291
Fine.
440
00:18:25,359 --> 00:18:26,592
Hurry up, will ya?
441
00:18:27,961 --> 00:18:29,395
Ok.
442
00:18:29,463 --> 00:18:31,564
Wait a second!
This is pineapple!
443
00:18:31,632 --> 00:18:33,097
So? Get him pineapple.
444
00:18:33,165 --> 00:18:34,666
The man wants lemon!
445
00:18:37,270 --> 00:18:39,371
This is banana! Damn it,
they're all yellow!
446
00:18:39,438 --> 00:18:40,739
Will you hurry up?
447
00:18:40,806 --> 00:18:42,774
Well, there it is. Lemon.
There's lemon. Ok.
448
00:18:42,841 --> 00:18:43,940
Let's go.
449
00:18:44,008 --> 00:18:45,041
Ooh, it's a little gooey...
450
00:18:45,109 --> 00:18:46,209
Let's go! Ok!
451
00:18:50,047 --> 00:18:52,750
Hey, could I get a slice
and a coke, please?
452
00:18:53,951 --> 00:18:56,719
Uh, sorry. We're closed.
453
00:18:56,787 --> 00:18:58,988
Aw, come on, man. I
just got off my shift.
454
00:19:00,557 --> 00:19:02,825
Guy, I already z'd
out the register.
455
00:19:05,996 --> 00:19:08,363
Ok, fine.
456
00:19:20,842 --> 00:19:22,009
"Coke," you said?
457
00:19:22,076 --> 00:19:23,210
Yeah.
458
00:19:23,278 --> 00:19:24,712
Pepsi, ok?
459
00:19:24,780 --> 00:19:25,979
Sure.
460
00:19:41,394 --> 00:19:43,161
You havin' a good Halloween?
461
00:19:43,296 --> 00:19:44,696
Oh, yeah, sure, you know.
462
00:19:44,764 --> 00:19:46,865
Got stuck in traffic
comin' home, though.
463
00:19:46,932 --> 00:19:49,001
They're havin' that big gay
pride parade downtown.
464
00:19:49,068 --> 00:19:51,869
Oh, man, that's a wild
scene, I gotta tell ya.
465
00:19:53,071 --> 00:19:54,205
My son's gay.
466
00:19:56,508 --> 00:19:57,575
Oh, yeah?
467
00:19:57,643 --> 00:19:59,610
Yeah, yeah.
468
00:19:59,678 --> 00:20:01,779
Great kid. Great kid. Hmm.
469
00:20:02,447 --> 00:20:03,980
I love him a lot.
470
00:20:04,047 --> 00:20:05,182
Aw.
471
00:20:06,350 --> 00:20:08,384
Hey! Open the door!
472
00:20:08,452 --> 00:20:10,387
You know what? We,
uh, we gotta go.
473
00:20:32,541 --> 00:20:33,942
Hey!
474
00:20:33,976 --> 00:20:35,810
I got you somethin'.
475
00:20:35,877 --> 00:20:38,144
I think you're gonna
like it, pal.
476
00:20:58,231 --> 00:20:59,697
He's fine.
477
00:21:00,732 --> 00:21:02,801
He had another slight episode,
478
00:21:02,869 --> 00:21:05,036
but thankfully, there was
no additional damage
479
00:21:05,104 --> 00:21:06,170
to the heart.
480
00:21:06,238 --> 00:21:07,439
Oh! Thank God.
481
00:21:07,507 --> 00:21:10,275
But it might be a good
idea to stop scaring him.
482
00:21:10,343 --> 00:21:11,342
Mmm-hmm.
483
00:21:11,409 --> 00:21:12,676
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
484
00:21:12,744 --> 00:21:14,478
Thank you, doctor.
485
00:21:18,516 --> 00:21:20,884
It was a paper bag!
486
00:21:30,594 --> 00:21:31,860
So what do you think?
487
00:21:34,130 --> 00:21:35,630
Delicious, Douglas.
488
00:21:35,698 --> 00:21:36,898
Thank you.
489
00:21:38,835 --> 00:21:41,903
This really takes me back.
490
00:21:55,483 --> 00:21:57,383
Lemon ices!
33908
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