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1
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Something terrible in this coffee.
2
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Oh! Ha, ha. It's my finger.
3
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[DOOR OPENS]
4
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Hey, who are you?
5
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I am Señor Wences,
the ventriloquist and juggler.
6
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Oh, Señor Wences.
7
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Of course, I knew you was a ventriloquist,
but I didn't know you was a juggler.
8
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Hey. You come back here and pick those up.
9
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It's The Muppet Show,
10
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with our very special guest star,
Señor Wences. Yay!
11
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[BAND PLAYING THEME MUSIC]
12
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♪ It's time to play the music ♪
13
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♪ It's time to light the lights ♪
14
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♪ It's time to meet the Muppets
On The Muppet Show tonight ♪
15
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♪ It's time to put on makeup ♪
16
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♪ It's time to dress up right ♪
17
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♪ It's time to raise the curtain
On The Muppet Show tonight ♪
18
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♪ Why do we always come here? ♪
19
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♪ I guess we'll never know ♪
20
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♪ It's like a kind of torture ♪
21
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-♪ To have to watch this show ♪
-♪ To have to watch this show ♪
22
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♪ But now let's get things started ♪
23
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♪ Why don't you get things started? ♪
24
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♪ It's time to get things started
On the most sensational, inspirational ♪
25
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♪ Celebrational, Muppetational ♪
26
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♪ This is what we call ♪
27
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♪ The Muppet Show ♪
28
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[PLAYS BEETHOVEN SYMPHONY OPENING]
29
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What were you expecting, Rachmaninoff?
30
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[SIGHS]
31
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[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
32
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Thank you, hi-ho,
and welcome again to The Muppet Show.
33
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We've got a super surprise treat
in store for you,
34
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because our guest star is one of
the world's great ventriloquists,
35
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the amazing Señor Wences.
36
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[AUDIENCE GASPS]
37
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Yes. And we also have a guest puppeteer,
Mr. Bruce Schwartz.
38
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[AUDIENCE GASPS]
39
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Right. So we're gonna switch
the entire show around.
40
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It's a complete change of pace, folks.
41
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Tonight, we're going to do a Puppet Show.
42
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[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
43
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Yes. Yes, it's a real first.
44
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And now, to start things off,
45
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here is Pinocchio himself,
singing "Puppet Man."
46
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[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
47
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♪ Papa, Papa, you know it's true ♪
48
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♪ I'm a puppet just for you ♪
49
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♪ I'll do anything you say ♪
50
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♪ I won't have it any other way ♪
51
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♪ Take my heart and take my soul ♪
52
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♪ I'm giving you complete control ♪
53
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♪ If you wanna see me do my thing ♪
54
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♪ Pull my string ♪
55
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♪ Pull my string? ♪
56
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♪ Puppet man ♪
57
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♪ Puppet man ♪
58
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-♪ Puppet man ♪
-♪ Papa, Papa, I'm your sweet pet ♪
59
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♪ I'm just your personal marionette ♪
60
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♪ Wind me up and let me go ♪
61
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♪ Don't you know I'm a one-man show ♪
62
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♪ Raise your finger and I'll perform
Cracker-jack 'til the crack of dawn ♪
63
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♪ If you wanna see me do my thing ♪
64
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♪ Pull my string ♪
65
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♪ Pull my string ♪
66
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♪ Puppet man ♪
67
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♪ Puppet man ♪
68
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♪ Puppet man ♪
69
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[ALL HUMMING]
70
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♪ If you wanna see me do my thing ♪
71
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♪ Pull my string, yeah! ♪
72
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♪ If you wanna see him do his thing ♪
73
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♪ Pull my string! ♪
74
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[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
75
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Personally, I don't care for puppets much.
I don't find them believable.
76
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I don't believe you.
77
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Okay, nice number.
78
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Pinocchio, I have good news for you,
79
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because Dr. Bob agreed
to do something about your nose.
80
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Well, nose news is good news.
81
00:04:49,748 --> 00:04:51,958
Oh, boy. I just love the show tonight.
82
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I think the idea of an all-puppet show
is not too shabby.
83
00:04:55,587 --> 00:04:57,130
-Kermit, Kermit, Kermit.
-Hm?
84
00:04:57,213 --> 00:04:59,007
I wanna do a puppet act.
85
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Stand by for disaster.
86
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-Hey, guys.
-Gonzo, you wanna do a puppet act with me?
87
00:05:05,388 --> 00:05:07,098
Cue the disaster.
88
00:05:07,182 --> 00:05:09,017
-What's a puppet?
-Oh, well, see--
89
00:05:09,100 --> 00:05:12,103
-It's a doll that's made to look alive...
-Yeah. It's a doll.
90
00:05:12,187 --> 00:05:15,398
...by wiggling strings
or putting your hand inside of it, and--
91
00:05:15,482 --> 00:05:17,776
-Like that.
-What a stupid idea.
92
00:05:17,859 --> 00:05:20,820
Who wants to watch dolls wiggle?
93
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Well...
94
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Even I wouldn't do an act like that.
Doll wiggling, talk about boring.
95
00:05:28,620 --> 00:05:30,163
But...
96
00:05:30,246 --> 00:05:32,248
I didn't have the heart to tell him.
97
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Okay. Now tonight's special guest star,
ladies and gentlemen,
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one of our very favorite performers,
99
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the international, the fabulous,
the terrific Señor Wences!
100
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Olé! Olé!
101
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[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
102
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-Ready? Good.
-Yes.
103
00:05:53,645 --> 00:05:54,854
-Your name?
-Johnny.
104
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-Johnny.
-Martin.
105
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-Martin. Good boy?
-Yes.
106
00:05:57,482 --> 00:05:59,859
-Good. How do you feel today?
-No good.
107
00:05:59,943 --> 00:06:01,861
-No good?
-No.
108
00:06:01,945 --> 00:06:02,987
-Headache?
-Yes.
109
00:06:03,071 --> 00:06:04,948
-Fever?
-Yes.
110
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-Fever, no. No.
-No? No.
111
00:06:06,741 --> 00:06:08,743
No. Give me your breath.
112
00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:10,995
-I don't think so.
-No?
113
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No. Open your mouth.
114
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Little more.
115
00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:16,042
More. No, no, no.
116
00:06:16,126 --> 00:06:18,378
-No?
-No, too much. Open like me. "Ah."
117
00:06:18,461 --> 00:06:20,296
Good. Show me your tongue.
118
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:21,923
Very good.
119
00:06:23,299 --> 00:06:24,884
-I have one idea, Johnny.
-Yes?
120
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-Yes. Do you remember the Spanish song?
-Yes.
121
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-Can you sing for me now?
-Please? Yeah.
122
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Okay. You alone.
123
00:06:32,851 --> 00:06:36,146
[SINGING IN SPANISH]
124
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Louder.
125
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[MUFFLED SINGING]
126
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[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
127
00:07:11,348 --> 00:07:12,557
-Very good, Johnny.
-Yeah?
128
00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:13,683
-Yes.
-Nice?
129
00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:15,018
Very nice. Nice voice.
130
00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:16,728
-Yes?
-Yes. I like you very much.
131
00:07:16,811 --> 00:07:18,563
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
132
00:07:18,646 --> 00:07:19,856
-Rest for a while?
-Yes.
133
00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:21,524
Sure.
134
00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:23,318
-Ready, my friend?
MUFFLED VOICE: No.
135
00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:25,111
-Not yet. No, okay.
-No.
136
00:07:25,195 --> 00:07:27,405
-It's all right.
-That's good.
137
00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:30,575
-Would you like, Pedro, to sing with me?
-Sure.
138
00:07:30,658 --> 00:07:32,369
Good. I have one idea.
139
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,829
-Before, we need to vocalize.
-Why?
140
00:07:34,913 --> 00:07:39,209
Very important.
Because I need to know your lung capacity.
141
00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:40,627
-That's all?
-That's all.
142
00:07:40,710 --> 00:07:43,171
When you see me close, open the door,
do you mind?
143
00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:44,964
-No.
-No. You see. Do this.
144
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[SINGS]
145
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Repeat.
146
00:07:48,426 --> 00:07:49,928
[SINGS]
147
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-Better.
-Good.
148
00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:53,848
And repeat the same,
you see the difference.
149
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:56,309
[SINGING]
150
00:07:56,393 --> 00:07:58,103
[SINGING]
151
00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:06,736
-Very good.
JOHNNY: Very nice.
152
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:07,862
-You like?
JOHNNY: Yes.
153
00:08:07,946 --> 00:08:09,656
Thank you very much.
154
00:08:09,739 --> 00:08:12,867
Now, Johnny,
I have a very nice treat for you.
155
00:08:12,951 --> 00:08:14,160
JOHNNY: Now?
-Now.
156
00:08:14,244 --> 00:08:15,286
-Yes?
-Yes.
157
00:08:15,370 --> 00:08:16,663
-Are you interested?
-Very.
158
00:08:16,746 --> 00:08:17,872
Thank you very much.
159
00:08:17,956 --> 00:08:21,126
You see? You can do beautiful things.
Slowly. See?
160
00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:23,420
Don't be nervous. Watch.
161
00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:24,546
-You like it?
-Yes.
162
00:08:24,629 --> 00:08:26,297
-Finished?
-Not finished.
163
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,467
-Finished?
-Not yet.
164
00:08:29,551 --> 00:08:31,094
-No?
-No.
165
00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:32,887
Finished?
166
00:08:32,971 --> 00:08:35,306
Not yet. I said, not yet.
167
00:08:35,390 --> 00:08:36,933
-Not yet?
-Not yet.
168
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,184
PEDRO: Please.
-Sorry.
169
00:08:38,268 --> 00:08:40,937
-It's all right.
-All right. All right.
170
00:08:42,147 --> 00:08:43,940
Watch, okay?
171
00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:45,442
Don't be nervous.
172
00:08:48,486 --> 00:08:50,572
JOHNNY:
Not so close.
173
00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:53,450
-I know what I am doing.
JOHNNY: Yes, but I don't.
174
00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:56,494
-Tell me, Johnny, are you afraid?
-No.
175
00:08:56,578 --> 00:08:57,954
-You're not afraid?
-No.
176
00:08:58,038 --> 00:08:59,414
-Are you afraid?
PEDRO: Not yet.
177
00:08:59,497 --> 00:09:01,291
All right, don't worry.
178
00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:04,169
-You don't care, Pedro, if I open?
PEDRO: No.
179
00:09:04,252 --> 00:09:05,920
-Okay.
-Okay, that's good.
180
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,550
JOHNNY:
Ay-ay-ay.
181
00:09:10,633 --> 00:09:12,344
-Don't worry.
JOHNNY: Please.
182
00:09:12,427 --> 00:09:15,180
Don't worry. And now you do this. Look.
183
00:09:15,263 --> 00:09:17,098
And center.
184
00:09:20,435 --> 00:09:21,895
That's good.
185
00:09:22,937 --> 00:09:24,731
JOHNNY:
One o'clock.
186
00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:29,778
-It's nice, eh?
JOHNNY: Yes.
187
00:09:29,861 --> 00:09:31,654
-Please.
-Don't worry.
188
00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:33,865
JOHNNY: Ay-ay-ay.
-Don't worry.
189
00:09:33,948 --> 00:09:37,577
PEDRO: Close the door.
-All right, don't worry, I will.
190
00:09:37,660 --> 00:09:39,746
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
191
00:09:49,255 --> 00:09:50,757
-Olé!
-Bravo!
192
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,676
-It's all right?
-It's all right.
193
00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:59,349
NARRATOR: Time once again
for Veterinarian's Hospital,
194
00:09:59,432 --> 00:10:03,687
the continuing story of a quack...
195
00:10:05,146 --> 00:10:08,233
who's gone to the dogs.
196
00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:12,612
Dr. Bob, this is Pinocchio.
197
00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:15,031
He wants a nose job.
198
00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:16,408
[GROANS]
199
00:10:16,491 --> 00:10:18,743
Listen, it's more than a job,
it's a career.
200
00:10:20,286 --> 00:10:24,958
How'd his nose get so long?
Was his mother frightened by the Concorde?
201
00:10:25,041 --> 00:10:27,836
Dr. Bob, he is made out of wood.
202
00:10:27,919 --> 00:10:28,962
-Wood?
-Mm.
203
00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:31,965
Then he doesn't need a doctor,
he needs a tree surgeon.
204
00:10:33,008 --> 00:10:36,845
You don't understand. Every time
I tell a lie, my nose grows a foot.
205
00:10:36,928 --> 00:10:39,389
Then he needs a foot doctor.
206
00:10:39,472 --> 00:10:41,850
That's funny.
207
00:10:44,728 --> 00:10:49,315
Dr. Bob, with a nose like that,
I wonder if he has a keen sense of smell.
208
00:10:49,399 --> 00:10:51,693
I hope not. This sketch could kill him.
209
00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:57,157
Bob, you've got to help him.
Shorten his nose. He'll feel better.
210
00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:58,491
I got a better idea.
211
00:10:58,575 --> 00:11:01,911
I'll shorten the sketch,
and then everybody will feel better.
212
00:11:02,954 --> 00:11:05,957
-And so we come to the end.
NARRATOR: And so we come to the end...
213
00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:09,085
-Good.
-...of another Veterinarian's Hospital.
214
00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:11,921
Tune in next week,
when you'll hear Dr. Bob say:
215
00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:16,134
Wait a minute. I just remembered, I can't
operate on anybody made out of wood.
216
00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:19,012
-Why not?
-I can't stand the sight of sawdust.
217
00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:24,976
-Boo!
-Terrible!
218
00:11:25,060 --> 00:11:26,311
-Bad!
-Not bad.
219
00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:28,396
-Well, pretty good.
-Okay.
220
00:11:28,480 --> 00:11:29,564
-Decent.
-Fair.
221
00:11:29,647 --> 00:11:30,690
-Great.
-I loved it.
222
00:11:30,774 --> 00:11:32,484
Bravo!
223
00:11:34,402 --> 00:11:37,072
Ladies and gentlemen,
no puppet show would be complete
224
00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:41,117
without a performance
of Swedish bread-lump puppetry,
225
00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:44,829
as demonstrated here
by our own Swedish Chef. Yay!
226
00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:54,756
[SINGING GIBBERISH]
227
00:12:10,313 --> 00:12:12,440
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
228
00:12:17,028 --> 00:12:20,407
Wow, Tanya, if you could do that,
we'd have a great act.
229
00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:21,533
Go practice.
230
00:12:21,616 --> 00:12:24,327
-Excuse me, Mister Señor Wences.
-It's all right, don't worry.
231
00:12:24,411 --> 00:12:29,040
Yeah. I didn't wanna interrupt you,
but Mr. The Frog wanted me to tell you
232
00:12:29,124 --> 00:12:33,712
that the telephone in this dressing room
is not working.
233
00:12:33,795 --> 00:12:35,880
-This telephone?
-Yeah. That's the one.
234
00:12:35,964 --> 00:12:37,007
[PHONE RINGS]
235
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:39,092
-You make me laugh.
-Huh?
236
00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:40,802
[VOICE SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY ON PHONE]
237
00:12:40,885 --> 00:12:41,928
-Yeah.
-Yeah?
238
00:12:42,012 --> 00:12:45,056
Yes, I was waiting for you
for the last two weeks.
239
00:12:45,140 --> 00:12:46,474
-Yes?
-Yes.
240
00:12:46,558 --> 00:12:48,101
Everybody nice.
241
00:12:48,184 --> 00:12:49,602
[VOICE SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
242
00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:51,354
Yes, I know.
243
00:12:52,397 --> 00:12:57,861
-Hey. What the hey.
-Yes. Yes, yes, yes, I know that.
244
00:12:57,944 --> 00:13:01,197
Yes. Okay.
245
00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:03,908
Yes. One second, yes, yes.
246
00:13:03,992 --> 00:13:05,869
Of course. He's here.
247
00:13:05,952 --> 00:13:07,120
-Lew?
-Huh?
248
00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:08,997
I have a message for you.
249
00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:12,917
-For me? Oh, you must be mistaken.
-No mistake at all.
250
00:13:13,001 --> 00:13:14,669
It is the phone company.
251
00:13:14,753 --> 00:13:18,673
They want you
to stop breaking the telephone.
252
00:13:18,757 --> 00:13:20,467
Okay?
253
00:13:20,550 --> 00:13:23,136
-Okay.
PEDRO: It's all right.
254
00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:24,804
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
255
00:13:26,056 --> 00:13:29,434
Kermit, theater manager,
green thing, and boss.
256
00:13:29,517 --> 00:13:30,727
Uh, yes, Beauregard?
257
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:33,772
Well, did you know
that I have some puppets?
258
00:13:33,855 --> 00:13:35,815
-No.
-Yes.
259
00:13:35,899 --> 00:13:38,902
When I heard about the show tonight,
I brought them.
260
00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:40,362
Look.
261
00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:43,490
KERMIT:
Hey. Those look great.
262
00:13:43,573 --> 00:13:47,327
Yes. And now I'm going to give you
an amateur puppet show.
263
00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:50,121
Oh, wonderful. I just love puppet shows.
264
00:13:50,205 --> 00:13:53,625
Great. Okay, I'll go down now.
265
00:13:53,708 --> 00:13:55,710
Whoops. Wrong one.
266
00:13:58,588 --> 00:13:59,798
Bravo, bravo.
267
00:13:59,881 --> 00:14:01,466
Thank you, thank you.
268
00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:03,718
-Uh, not you, Beau.
-Oh.
269
00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:07,514
Well, who are you?
270
00:14:07,597 --> 00:14:10,392
Oh, I am just a big friendly dog.
271
00:14:10,475 --> 00:14:12,602
Well, then why are you green?
272
00:14:12,686 --> 00:14:14,771
I am an Irish setter.
273
00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:18,191
Oh. I hope you wouldn't bite my hand.
274
00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:19,734
Here.
275
00:14:19,818 --> 00:14:22,821
Ow! Hey. You bit my thumb.
276
00:14:22,904 --> 00:14:27,492
-Uh, you're not supposed to come up.
-Yeah, but he hurt me.
277
00:14:27,575 --> 00:14:28,952
Just watch it.
278
00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:31,204
Well, let's see, where was I?
279
00:14:31,287 --> 00:14:34,374
Oh, I was going to bite you very badly.
280
00:14:34,457 --> 00:14:38,211
Oh, I hope you don't.
I might have to get out my stick.
281
00:14:38,294 --> 00:14:40,714
Well, that's too bad. Here I come.
282
00:14:42,048 --> 00:14:43,758
-[SHOUTING]
-Kermit.
283
00:14:43,842 --> 00:14:46,886
Uh, just a second.
I'm watching a puppet show right now.
284
00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:52,809
Kermit, is this what you have booked
on the show tonight instead of moi?
285
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:53,935
Piggy, please.
286
00:14:54,019 --> 00:14:58,231
I had a song for tonight
but you said the dolls are going to be on.
287
00:14:58,982 --> 00:15:02,360
-Uh, yeah-- But-- Uh...
-Kermit, watch me.
288
00:15:02,444 --> 00:15:04,821
-These are not just dolls.
-Why can't I do my number?
289
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:08,158
-Puppetry is an art form, Piggy.
-You call that violence art?
290
00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:10,994
-Well, violence belongs with puppets.
-He's hitting her?
291
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:13,288
That's Punch and Judy.
They've always been violent.
292
00:15:13,371 --> 00:15:14,706
-Punch and Judy?
-It's good.
293
00:15:14,789 --> 00:15:17,375
-It's a good aggressive behavior.
-Yeah? Better than my act?
294
00:15:17,459 --> 00:15:19,252
-Piggy--
-I'll show you aggressive.
295
00:15:19,336 --> 00:15:22,047
-What--? Piggy--
-I'll show you behavior. I'll show you.
296
00:15:22,130 --> 00:15:24,174
-I'll show you. Hi-yah!
-What-- Piggy--
297
00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:25,425
Aah!
298
00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:27,010
Punch and Judy.
299
00:15:28,511 --> 00:15:30,847
Bravo! Bravo!
300
00:15:32,349 --> 00:15:36,644
Now, ladies and gentlemen, we have with us
one of the world's great puppeteers--
301
00:15:36,728 --> 00:15:38,271
Oh! Oh, thank you.
302
00:15:38,355 --> 00:15:39,564
Thank you. Ha, ha!
303
00:15:39,647 --> 00:15:40,857
Not you, Fozzie.
304
00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:43,443
-I'm talking about Bruce Schwartz.
-Oh.
305
00:15:43,526 --> 00:15:47,155
Well, when you're ready, I'm ready.
306
00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:49,616
That's a mighty iffy "when."
307
00:15:49,699 --> 00:15:53,578
Uh, and now, ladies and gentlemen,
with a traditional Japanese ghost story,
308
00:15:53,661 --> 00:15:56,164
our guest puppeteer, Bruce Schwartz.
309
00:15:56,247 --> 00:15:58,333
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
310
00:16:04,798 --> 00:16:07,300
[JAPANESE FOLK MUSIC PLAYING]
311
00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:06,396
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
312
00:19:13,778 --> 00:19:16,823
Boy, these puppets
are really classing things up around here.
313
00:19:16,906 --> 00:19:20,702
You think that's classy?
Look at Gumdrop the Gorilla.
314
00:19:20,785 --> 00:19:23,621
Uh, Gumdrop is part of
your marionette act, right?
315
00:19:23,705 --> 00:19:25,290
Yeah, yeah, see, he dances.
316
00:19:25,373 --> 00:19:27,292
Dance, dance, dance.
317
00:19:27,375 --> 00:19:28,877
And he talks.
318
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:31,588
Hello, Mr. Frog.
319
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:36,134
Huh? Huh? See, what's gonna happen,
I'll open with Gumdrop the Gorilla,
320
00:19:36,217 --> 00:19:39,596
and then I'll follow
with the dancing clown. Huh?
321
00:19:40,638 --> 00:19:44,601
Yeah. Well, well,
Gumdrop looks a little tangled up there.
322
00:19:44,684 --> 00:19:47,437
Oh, yeah, well,
you have to know how to do this.
323
00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:49,356
Uh, gotta be a professional here.
324
00:19:49,439 --> 00:19:53,693
You see, what happens with the strings,
all you have to do...
325
00:19:56,571 --> 00:19:58,907
I'll open with the dancing clown.
326
00:19:58,990 --> 00:20:00,700
-I'll introduce you.
-Thank you.
327
00:20:00,784 --> 00:20:02,744
Never thank the executioner.
328
00:20:02,827 --> 00:20:04,245
-What?
-Nothing.
329
00:20:05,497 --> 00:20:08,500
All right, it's showtime.
330
00:20:10,001 --> 00:20:12,379
Wiggling dolls is weird.
331
00:20:12,462 --> 00:20:14,297
In fact, it might even be sick.
332
00:20:17,008 --> 00:20:20,345
Okay, well, I think
there's no way to avoid it, folks.
333
00:20:20,428 --> 00:20:24,557
So here he is, Fozzie Bear
and his high-strung marionette.
334
00:20:24,641 --> 00:20:26,726
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
335
00:20:32,190 --> 00:20:34,818
Oh, boy. This is terrific.
336
00:20:34,901 --> 00:20:37,195
This could be a whole new career.
337
00:20:37,278 --> 00:20:38,530
I-- I mean, I--
338
00:20:38,613 --> 00:20:43,118
I never felt so-- So in command before.
Look at that.
339
00:20:47,247 --> 00:20:51,042
Ha. It moves at my command.
340
00:20:52,460 --> 00:20:57,132
I pull the string,
and it does anything that I want it to.
341
00:20:59,259 --> 00:21:02,804
You know, I don't wanna do this anymore.
342
00:21:02,887 --> 00:21:04,139
Hey, you.
343
00:21:04,222 --> 00:21:05,640
Rug-face.
344
00:21:05,724 --> 00:21:06,975
What? Who, me?
345
00:21:07,058 --> 00:21:09,436
Yeah. Come here.
346
00:21:09,519 --> 00:21:11,187
[FOZZIE YELLS]
347
00:21:12,564 --> 00:21:15,316
[CLOWN CHUCKLES]
348
00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:17,277
It's all part of the act, folks.
349
00:21:18,570 --> 00:21:20,155
Kermit!
350
00:21:21,156 --> 00:21:24,617
Fozzie was right.
It's a terrific idea for an act.
351
00:21:25,994 --> 00:21:29,831
Ah, what do you know about it,
banana beak?
352
00:21:32,500 --> 00:21:33,626
Poor Fozzie.
353
00:21:33,710 --> 00:21:36,254
I don't know whether to laugh
or feel sorry for him.
354
00:21:36,338 --> 00:21:39,632
-He wanted to make us laugh.
-I feel sorry for him.
355
00:21:42,177 --> 00:21:44,220
Hey, Fozzie, are you coming off-stage
or what?
356
00:21:44,304 --> 00:21:46,639
Yeah, come on,
why don't you get a class act?
357
00:21:46,723 --> 00:21:48,975
-Boy, that was terrible.
-But you saw what happened.
358
00:21:49,059 --> 00:21:50,810
It was good.
359
00:21:50,894 --> 00:21:52,771
Hush, hush up. Quiet down.
360
00:21:52,854 --> 00:21:53,980
-Be quiet.
-What?
361
00:21:54,064 --> 00:21:57,275
We're trying to watch
the señor's big finale.
362
00:21:57,359 --> 00:22:00,528
You won't get to see it
unless you show respect and hush up.
363
00:22:00,612 --> 00:22:05,033
We won't get to see him if you don't show
respect and go out and introduce him.
364
00:22:06,076 --> 00:22:08,578
FOZZIE: Quiet, quiet.
-Shh. Shh.
365
00:22:08,661 --> 00:22:10,080
Quiet.
366
00:22:10,163 --> 00:22:12,040
[TRUMPETS PLAY FANFARE]
367
00:22:12,123 --> 00:22:13,667
Uh... Uh...
368
00:22:13,750 --> 00:22:16,211
Now, ladies and gentlemen,
once again, here he is,
369
00:22:16,294 --> 00:22:20,423
our very super special guest star,
Señor Wences! Yeah!
370
00:22:20,507 --> 00:22:22,592
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
371
00:22:27,263 --> 00:22:29,933
-Tell me, please, what is your first name?
-Cecilia.
372
00:22:30,016 --> 00:22:31,267
Oh, Cecilia.
373
00:22:31,351 --> 00:22:33,186
-And second name?
-Chicken.
374
00:22:33,269 --> 00:22:34,688
Chicken.
375
00:22:34,771 --> 00:22:37,774
-My name is Señor Wences.
-Oh.
376
00:22:38,817 --> 00:22:41,152
-This is Johnny.
JOHNNY: Martin.
377
00:22:41,236 --> 00:22:42,737
-Yes.
JOHNNY: Yes.
378
00:22:42,821 --> 00:22:44,447
-Nice?
-Nice boy.
379
00:22:44,531 --> 00:22:46,199
-You like Cecilia?
JOHNNY: Yes.
380
00:22:46,282 --> 00:22:47,909
-Thank you.
JOHNNY: Thank you.
381
00:22:47,992 --> 00:22:49,911
-Thank you.
JOHNNY: Thank you.
382
00:22:49,994 --> 00:22:51,496
-Eh.
JOHNNY: Eh.
383
00:22:52,622 --> 00:22:54,124
-Eh.
PEDRO: Eh.
384
00:22:55,250 --> 00:22:56,376
Who is that?
385
00:22:56,459 --> 00:22:58,086
[WHISPERS] Pedro.
386
00:22:59,921 --> 00:23:01,965
[PEDRO GRUMBLING]
387
00:23:02,048 --> 00:23:03,550
Please, don't worry.
388
00:23:03,633 --> 00:23:06,553
Tell me, Cecilia, please, what is that?
389
00:23:06,636 --> 00:23:07,762
My son.
390
00:23:08,805 --> 00:23:10,265
Your son or your daughter?
391
00:23:10,348 --> 00:23:12,350
-My son.
-How do you know?
392
00:23:12,434 --> 00:23:15,145
-I know my business.
-Your business? That's good.
393
00:23:15,228 --> 00:23:16,813
Can you help me, please?
394
00:23:16,896 --> 00:23:19,232
-Now?
-Now. Yes, please.
395
00:23:19,315 --> 00:23:21,026
[VOICE SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY ON PHONE]
396
00:23:21,109 --> 00:23:22,402
Yeah?
397
00:23:22,485 --> 00:23:24,195
-Who's this?
-Mary.
398
00:23:24,279 --> 00:23:25,363
-Mary?
-Moreno?
399
00:23:25,447 --> 00:23:26,489
Moreno is not here.
400
00:23:26,573 --> 00:23:27,991
-No?
-No, I'm sorry.
401
00:23:28,074 --> 00:23:30,452
-Señor Wences speaking, remember me?
-No.
402
00:23:30,535 --> 00:23:31,786
-Oh, no. No.
JOHNNY: No?
403
00:23:31,870 --> 00:23:33,288
-What?
-I don't know.
404
00:23:33,371 --> 00:23:34,706
The ventriloquist.
405
00:23:35,749 --> 00:23:39,169
-The ventriloquist. Yeah, how are you?
-Fine, you?
406
00:23:39,252 --> 00:23:42,255
Very well, please.
Will you do me a favor? Call your brother.
407
00:23:42,339 --> 00:23:44,591
-Really?
-Please. Very important.
408
00:23:44,674 --> 00:23:46,509
Nice kiss.
409
00:23:46,593 --> 00:23:48,261
Thank you.
410
00:23:48,345 --> 00:23:49,554
JOHNNY: To me.
-To you?
411
00:23:49,637 --> 00:23:51,848
-Yes?
-Yes. Yes, for a nice boy.
412
00:23:51,931 --> 00:23:53,975
JOHNNY: Thank you.
-Once to me.
413
00:23:54,059 --> 00:23:55,727
-To everyone.
PEDRO: Not to me.
414
00:23:55,810 --> 00:23:58,772
-Don't worry, Pedro. Hello?
-Moreno?
415
00:23:58,855 --> 00:24:00,732
-How are you?
-I'm good.
416
00:24:00,815 --> 00:24:03,026
Excuse me,
I call you at a very bad moment.
417
00:24:03,109 --> 00:24:04,736
-Excuse, eh? One second.
-Yeah.
418
00:24:04,819 --> 00:24:08,615
Yesterday, I spoke with the pianist, Mr.--
What is the name?
419
00:24:08,698 --> 00:24:10,408
JOHNNY: Manolo.
-Manolo.
420
00:24:10,492 --> 00:24:12,035
-Manolo.
-Yeah.
421
00:24:12,118 --> 00:24:16,414
I would like you to come tomorrow morning
in plenty of time to start the song.
422
00:24:16,498 --> 00:24:18,708
-Tomorrow morning?
-Tomorrow. One more second.
423
00:24:18,792 --> 00:24:22,045
At what time rehearsal tomorrow morning,
8:00 or 10:00?
424
00:24:22,128 --> 00:24:23,171
JOHNNY: Ten.
-Ten?
425
00:24:23,254 --> 00:24:24,798
JOHNNY: Yes.
-Yes. Ten o'clock, no?
426
00:24:24,881 --> 00:24:27,175
PEDRO: I don't care.
-All right. Don't worry.
427
00:24:27,258 --> 00:24:29,761
-Ten o'clock tomorrow morning.
-Tomorrow morning.
428
00:24:29,844 --> 00:24:32,055
-Don't forget. No. No.
-No. No. No.
429
00:24:32,138 --> 00:24:33,640
-Thank you very much.
JOHNNY: Okay?
430
00:24:33,723 --> 00:24:34,849
-Okay. Okay.
-Okay?
431
00:24:34,933 --> 00:24:37,310
-Okay?
PEDRO: It's all right.
432
00:24:37,394 --> 00:24:39,479
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
433
00:24:48,321 --> 00:24:50,365
[ALL SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]
434
00:24:58,540 --> 00:25:02,502
Okay, well, that just about brings
to an end the Muppet Puppet Show.
435
00:25:02,585 --> 00:25:05,630
But before we go,
let us thank our guest, Bruce Schwartz,
436
00:25:05,714 --> 00:25:09,175
and our incredible guest star,
Señor Wences! Yay!
437
00:25:09,259 --> 00:25:11,344
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
438
00:25:12,637 --> 00:25:14,681
Thank you for your having me, Kermit.
439
00:25:14,764 --> 00:25:18,476
It's been a pleasure, and I'd like
to apologize for Fozzie's puppet act.
440
00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:19,894
I liked that very much.
441
00:25:19,978 --> 00:25:22,814
-You did?
FOZZIE: Kermit! Kermit! Ha-ha-ha!
442
00:25:22,897 --> 00:25:26,192
How about a new act here, huh?
Terrific. Ah!
443
00:25:27,569 --> 00:25:31,489
Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, oh, yeah.
This dummy-wiggling is sensational.
444
00:25:31,573 --> 00:25:34,409
What a feeling of power.
445
00:25:35,618 --> 00:25:37,954
Well, we'll see you next time
on The Muppet Show.
446
00:25:38,038 --> 00:25:40,915
-Ah!
-Fozzie, uh-- It was a wonderful show...
447
00:25:40,999 --> 00:25:42,459
[FOZZIE YELLING]
448
00:25:42,542 --> 00:25:44,627
[BAND PLAYING THEME MUSIC]
449
00:26:21,873 --> 00:26:24,584
[BOTH HUMMING MUPPET SHOW THEME]
32583
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