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1
00:00:38,552 --> 00:00:40,782
Good evening,
ladies and gentlemen.
2
00:00:41,321 --> 00:00:43,619
I'm making credit cards.
3
00:00:52,966 --> 00:00:54,866
As you can see,
4
00:00:54,968 --> 00:00:59,667
this credit card is cleverly
patterned after the L5 note.
5
00:01:00,407 --> 00:01:03,968
In this way we do away with
such troublesome features
6
00:01:04,144 --> 00:01:09,013
as the monthly statement
or the necessity for solvency.
7
00:01:09,549 --> 00:01:13,679
Furthermore, these are good
in any city in the country
8
00:01:13,754 --> 00:01:16,450
and in any business
establishment.
9
00:01:17,057 --> 00:01:20,083
Provided the cashier
is near-sighted.
10
00:01:20,627 --> 00:01:23,289
And now you may
watch our play...
11
00:01:24,231 --> 00:01:26,290
If your credit is good.
12
00:02:05,439 --> 00:02:06,838
Can I come in?
13
00:02:07,941 --> 00:02:09,636
I'm Lois.
14
00:02:10,110 --> 00:02:12,010
I just fell in your ocean.
15
00:02:12,379 --> 00:02:13,846
I know you won't mind.
16
00:02:13,947 --> 00:02:16,040
Oh, I don't mind...
17
00:02:16,116 --> 00:02:19,711
I mean, it's not as though we couldn't
find another ocean, if we had to.
18
00:02:19,820 --> 00:02:22,584
Jimmy told me you'd
loan me your blanket.
19
00:02:22,656 --> 00:02:25,090
At least until
we get to his place.
20
00:02:25,192 --> 00:02:28,684
He's getting some things
out of the car.
21
00:02:31,131 --> 00:02:32,120
Jimmy?
22
00:02:32,299 --> 00:02:33,561
Jimmy Dolan, you mean?
23
00:02:33,633 --> 00:02:38,263
Mm-hmm. I'm just getting
started in the business.
24
00:02:38,738 --> 00:02:41,832
We came from
the studio together.
25
00:02:43,176 --> 00:02:44,200
I see.
26
00:02:44,945 --> 00:02:47,675
Well, you seem to have
been pretty well laundered.
27
00:02:48,515 --> 00:02:50,005
I'm cold.
28
00:02:50,083 --> 00:02:53,382
Look, I own a blanket, but
I think it's out on the line.
29
00:02:54,154 --> 00:02:55,451
Just a minute.
30
00:03:02,729 --> 00:03:04,720
There. How's that?
Thank you.
31
00:03:06,066 --> 00:03:08,557
Stevie! Stevie,
Stevie, listen,
32
00:03:08,635 --> 00:03:10,262
I gotta talk to ya.
Why?
33
00:03:10,437 --> 00:03:14,373
Why? So you can shine like a glow-worm
instead of a schnook, that's why.
34
00:03:14,441 --> 00:03:17,103
And maybe pick yourself up
two, 300 bucks.
35
00:03:17,477 --> 00:03:18,967
How much?
You heard me, man.
36
00:03:19,045 --> 00:03:22,173
Maybe I can't guarantee the three, but
there's at least two bills in it for you
37
00:03:22,249 --> 00:03:23,648
if you want
to wade through this.
38
00:03:23,717 --> 00:03:25,412
Another publicity job
for the studio?
39
00:03:25,552 --> 00:03:27,349
My biggest and best.
Well, no thanks.
40
00:03:27,420 --> 00:03:30,583
I'm halfway through my book. Oh,
halfway through your miserable book.
41
00:03:30,657 --> 00:03:32,955
Three-quarters through the
soles of your one pair of shoes.
42
00:03:33,026 --> 00:03:34,015
Jimmy.
43
00:03:34,327 --> 00:03:35,794
This is the
literary life?
44
00:03:35,862 --> 00:03:37,124
Thirty-five minutes
from Hollywood
45
00:03:37,197 --> 00:03:39,028
with all the comforts
of an abandoned mineshaft.
46
00:03:39,132 --> 00:03:41,066
Jimmy?
Look, Lilacs,
47
00:03:41,134 --> 00:03:43,295
go plant yourself someplace
until you're ready to bloom again.
48
00:03:43,370 --> 00:03:45,634
I'm talking with a man.
Can't you see that?
49
00:03:45,705 --> 00:03:51,200
Now look... Not here. My place,
baby. My place. You know the way.
50
00:03:51,278 --> 00:03:54,179
Don't ya, huh?
Come on.
51
00:03:55,282 --> 00:03:57,250
And don't brush your teeth
with the vodka again.
52
00:03:57,317 --> 00:03:58,807
Remember what
I told you last time?
53
00:03:58,885 --> 00:04:03,117
That was real sweet, Jimmy.
It gets a fella here.
54
00:04:03,623 --> 00:04:06,148
Come off it. Sentiment's
a waste of time.
55
00:04:06,226 --> 00:04:08,285
Can you do something
for her?
56
00:04:09,896 --> 00:04:12,091
What an awful
question to ask me.
57
00:04:14,935 --> 00:04:19,201
Stevie-boy, you're looking at a
man who just spent four solid hours
58
00:04:19,272 --> 00:04:20,967
in the M.P.'s
private office.
59
00:04:21,141 --> 00:04:24,372
In whose office? M.P., the
owner, the boss of the studio.
60
00:04:24,945 --> 00:04:26,537
He listened to everything
I had to say,
61
00:04:26,613 --> 00:04:27,910
and he said to me,
M.P. did, he said,
62
00:04:27,981 --> 00:04:31,439
"Jimmy, this can be the
biggest public relations deal
63
00:04:31,518 --> 00:04:33,452
"since the invention
of the Easter Bunny."
64
00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:34,748
What can be?
65
00:04:36,489 --> 00:04:39,219
The Betsy Blake thing.
What do you think? Oh.
66
00:04:39,626 --> 00:04:40,991
Well, you know what
happened to her, don't you?
67
00:04:41,261 --> 00:04:43,889
Well, sure. There hasn't been much
else in the paper for the past week.
68
00:04:44,631 --> 00:04:46,895
She got herself killed
in a speedboat accident.
69
00:04:46,967 --> 00:04:49,435
Just out beyond Catalina
Harbor, wasn't it? That's right.
70
00:04:50,203 --> 00:04:52,137
Her speedboat went head-on
into another speedboat,
71
00:04:52,205 --> 00:04:56,141
killing Mr. Louis Fryer, a fairly
important citizen in Pasadena, and herself.
72
00:04:56,876 --> 00:04:58,343
But the most important
thing is this.
73
00:05:00,747 --> 00:05:02,374
Until I had my talk
with M.P. this afternoon,
74
00:05:02,449 --> 00:05:06,180
it looked like Betsy had also sunk
a $6,000,000 Goliath production
75
00:05:06,252 --> 00:05:09,813
in living, breathing color, and
Audacio, the newest dimension in sound.
76
00:05:10,156 --> 00:05:12,090
You mean that picture,
Splendor? That's right.
77
00:05:12,292 --> 00:05:14,692
Well, it's all wrapped up.
No more retakes.
78
00:05:14,761 --> 00:05:17,286
The sets have been struck,
the whole thing's in a can.
79
00:05:17,430 --> 00:05:20,092
Just two days before she goes
out and gets herself killed.
80
00:05:21,668 --> 00:05:23,363
Well, that's kinda tough
on Betsy, I suppose,
81
00:05:23,436 --> 00:05:25,097
but how's it going
to hurt the picture?
82
00:05:25,438 --> 00:05:27,906
I mean, you've had nothing but
publicity for the past week.
83
00:05:28,608 --> 00:05:30,371
It could help the picture.
84
00:05:30,443 --> 00:05:34,402
Help it just great if we were going
into distribution today or tomorrow.
85
00:05:34,481 --> 00:05:36,949
But the important thing is that
we're all set for late autumn release,
86
00:05:37,017 --> 00:05:41,579
around Thanksgiving, to catch the holiday
trade and make a bid for the awards.
87
00:05:41,655 --> 00:05:43,418
Well, that's
three months away.
88
00:05:43,990 --> 00:05:45,787
By that time all
the excitement's over.
89
00:05:46,126 --> 00:05:49,186
The public interest is gonna
be as dead as Betsy Blake.
90
00:05:49,729 --> 00:05:52,562
By November you can change the
title to Asleep In The Deep.
91
00:06:06,513 --> 00:06:09,311
She was a real dish in her
day. I'll tell you that.
92
00:06:10,817 --> 00:06:12,785
What makes you think
they'll forget her so soon?
93
00:06:13,687 --> 00:06:14,915
Are you kidding?
94
00:06:15,989 --> 00:06:19,550
I was raised in this business,
Stevie-boy. It's in my blood.
95
00:06:20,427 --> 00:06:22,793
I've got what M.P. calls
"box-office instinct."
96
00:06:22,929 --> 00:06:24,863
I can't help it. Lights
go on and off inside of me.
97
00:06:24,931 --> 00:06:26,523
You know what I mean?
Oh, save it, please.
98
00:06:26,599 --> 00:06:28,624
Don't start talking like
a Hollywood pioneer to me.
99
00:06:28,702 --> 00:06:32,103
I happen to know you're just a
fresh kid chasing a rapid dollar.
100
00:06:32,338 --> 00:06:34,306
You're 23 years old.
101
00:06:34,874 --> 00:06:36,034
How do you know?
102
00:06:36,109 --> 00:06:38,976
That time two summers ago, when the
waiter wouldn't serve you a drink.
103
00:06:39,045 --> 00:06:40,740
You had to show him
your driver's license.
104
00:06:40,914 --> 00:06:42,643
You were 21 at the time.
105
00:06:43,183 --> 00:06:44,480
You think you're
pretty smart, don't ya?
106
00:06:44,551 --> 00:06:46,348
Well, I can add 21 and two.
107
00:06:46,453 --> 00:06:49,286
You think you're so smart that you have
to sit here in this sun-kissed pig sty,
108
00:06:49,355 --> 00:06:52,415
waiting for some kid like me to bail you
out of hock for a couple of hundred bucks.
109
00:06:52,492 --> 00:06:55,484
You can go now, Jimmy, and
take your money with you.
110
00:06:55,562 --> 00:06:58,053
Nobody asked you
to come down here.
111
00:06:59,666 --> 00:07:01,065
Can't you take a joke?
112
00:07:02,702 --> 00:07:06,399
Look, Stevie-boy, why do
you think I'm here, huh?
113
00:07:06,940 --> 00:07:09,841
Because you have to grind out 90
yards of copy about Betsy Blake
114
00:07:09,909 --> 00:07:13,106
and you haven't got the writing
talent of a backward high school boy.
115
00:07:13,179 --> 00:07:14,373
An equally important reason
116
00:07:14,447 --> 00:07:17,575
is that you don't want the people who
pay you a big fat salary to find it out.
117
00:07:22,055 --> 00:07:23,784
Well, looks like we
understand each other, right?
118
00:07:24,090 --> 00:07:25,114
I wouldn't say that,
119
00:07:25,191 --> 00:07:27,751
but we understand a few things we
mightn't have understood before.
120
00:07:31,531 --> 00:07:33,158
But about Betsy Blake,
121
00:07:33,666 --> 00:07:36,191
her body wasn't recovered
until this morning, was it?
122
00:07:36,269 --> 00:07:38,237
That's right. She washed up on the shore.
123
00:07:38,371 --> 00:07:39,668
The identification
was positive?
124
00:07:39,739 --> 00:07:40,831
Well, sure. Well...
125
00:07:41,741 --> 00:07:44,835
Naturally, she couldn't have
looked like Miss Palm Frond of 1943,
126
00:07:44,911 --> 00:07:46,936
but the authorities
were satisfied.
127
00:07:47,013 --> 00:07:48,844
That's what I told M.P.
this afternoon. I said,
128
00:07:48,915 --> 00:07:52,851
"That wraps it up. That makes
it official. The mystery's gone."
129
00:07:52,919 --> 00:07:56,184
A month from now people won't remember
whether it was Betsy Blake or Betty Boop
130
00:07:56,256 --> 00:07:58,121
that went for
a ride in that speedboat.
131
00:07:58,258 --> 00:08:00,055
They won't remember
unless...
132
00:08:00,727 --> 00:08:03,025
And that's when the
inspiration hit me, Steve.
133
00:08:03,096 --> 00:08:04,723
What inspiration?
134
00:08:05,698 --> 00:08:10,135
I pointed to a picture hanging on the
wall in M.P.'s office, and I said to him,
135
00:08:10,670 --> 00:08:12,001
"There's your solution,
right there."
136
00:08:12,071 --> 00:08:16,440
And it was a picture of Mr. Rudolph
Valentino. M.P. got the message.
137
00:08:16,843 --> 00:08:18,606
Well, what's Valentino
got to do with it?
138
00:08:19,746 --> 00:08:21,043
Death, man.
139
00:08:21,214 --> 00:08:23,273
Death turned Rudolph
Valentino into a legend.
140
00:08:23,349 --> 00:08:25,317
That's what M.P.
was able to understand.
141
00:08:25,485 --> 00:08:29,148
Some smart people saw to it that
Rudy had the most sensational funeral
142
00:08:29,222 --> 00:08:32,817
this country ever saw,
up to, but not including,
143
00:08:32,892 --> 00:08:35,019
the burial
of Miss Betsy Blake.
144
00:08:35,628 --> 00:08:37,289
What was done for the
screen's greatest lover
145
00:08:37,363 --> 00:08:38,955
certainly can be done
for Madame Mystery.
146
00:08:39,032 --> 00:08:40,090
Madame who?
147
00:08:40,166 --> 00:08:42,293
Madame Mystery, some name they
pinned on her a few years back
148
00:08:42,368 --> 00:08:44,165
when she was...
Mysterious?
149
00:08:44,237 --> 00:08:45,602
Yeah, mysterious.
150
00:08:45,839 --> 00:08:47,807
This thing that I'm about
to create, Stevie-boy,
151
00:08:47,874 --> 00:08:50,240
is an ark that's gonna
really be able to float.
152
00:08:51,044 --> 00:08:53,979
We're gonna bury Betsy Blake
like she was Mother Machree,
153
00:08:54,047 --> 00:08:56,481
Sweet Georgia Brown,
Cleopatra,
154
00:08:56,549 --> 00:08:58,016
The Sweetheart
of Sigma Chi,
155
00:08:58,084 --> 00:08:59,847
Salome, all wrapped
up into one.
156
00:08:59,919 --> 00:09:01,614
I'm going out, boy.
I'm going way, way out.
157
00:09:01,754 --> 00:09:03,949
And it's gonna make me
a big man in this town.
158
00:09:04,023 --> 00:09:05,354
I can just see it.
159
00:09:05,592 --> 00:09:07,719
Then we go into
the spook department.
160
00:09:10,496 --> 00:09:12,487
You'll hear it around
for a little while,
161
00:09:12,699 --> 00:09:14,894
but then you'll see
the first printed rumor.
162
00:09:16,035 --> 00:09:18,265
"Is Betsy Blake Still Alive?"
163
00:09:21,374 --> 00:09:24,571
Now, how can you get away with that
when she's being buried this week?
164
00:09:24,878 --> 00:09:30,282
That's the mystery angle, man.
You've got no imagination.
165
00:09:31,017 --> 00:09:32,382
We know she's dead.
166
00:09:32,886 --> 00:09:35,377
We know she's gone like
an old dropped lemon pie,
167
00:09:35,755 --> 00:09:38,553
but you gotta realize she's been
floating around in the water for a week,
168
00:09:38,625 --> 00:09:41,253
and she didn't look like...
You can skip the details.
169
00:09:41,828 --> 00:09:43,591
I keep forgetting
you're sensitive.
170
00:09:44,297 --> 00:09:47,789
Meanwhile, I'm juggling a couple
of other ideas for this campaign,
171
00:09:47,867 --> 00:09:50,836
The Real Betsy Blake and
The Betsy Blake Nobody Knows.
172
00:09:50,904 --> 00:09:51,996
What do you
think of that?
173
00:09:52,071 --> 00:09:53,299
Depends.
174
00:09:53,873 --> 00:09:57,866
I guess you can get a lot of mileage
out of The Betsy Blake that Nobody Knows.
175
00:09:57,944 --> 00:09:59,241
Did you know her?
176
00:09:59,312 --> 00:10:00,336
Are you kidding?
177
00:10:00,413 --> 00:10:02,210
I handled her
publicity for years.
178
00:10:02,282 --> 00:10:03,647
Oh, at your age?
179
00:10:03,750 --> 00:10:05,615
Look, will you lay off my age!
180
00:10:05,685 --> 00:10:09,246
Maybe Stalzbuck took the bows, as head
of promotion, but it was me, Stevie,
181
00:10:09,322 --> 00:10:11,790
little Jimmy here, that was
digging in there with that spade.
182
00:10:11,858 --> 00:10:13,120
That's what M.P.
was able to understand.
183
00:10:13,192 --> 00:10:15,183
What do you think he gave me
this big chance for, anyway?
184
00:10:15,261 --> 00:10:18,389
Now does that satisfy you?
Look, it's no skin off my nose.
185
00:10:18,464 --> 00:10:20,728
But incidentally,
how old was Betsy Blake?
186
00:10:21,534 --> 00:10:24,662
Well, let's say she was
no spring chicken,
187
00:10:24,737 --> 00:10:27,035
but she kept her feathers nice and smooth.
188
00:10:27,106 --> 00:10:29,336
Seems to me she was
around a pretty long time.
189
00:10:29,409 --> 00:10:31,240
Look, Stevie-boy, I've
got to have a prospectus
190
00:10:31,311 --> 00:10:33,404
in M.P.'s hands
by Monday morning.
191
00:10:33,479 --> 00:10:36,243
I'm counting on you, pal, to
help me with the fancy prose.
192
00:10:36,316 --> 00:10:37,715
So he'll think
you wrote it?
193
00:10:37,784 --> 00:10:39,115
Okay, I'll level with you.
194
00:10:39,319 --> 00:10:41,253
That 200 bucks comes
out of my pocket.
195
00:10:41,321 --> 00:10:42,720
So what?
So who cares?
196
00:10:42,789 --> 00:10:44,814
So it'll take you off
the K-rations for a while
197
00:10:44,891 --> 00:10:47,382
and you can go back to your
corny book with your stomach full.
198
00:10:47,560 --> 00:10:48,686
No. The answer is no.
199
00:10:49,862 --> 00:10:53,628
You know how I feel about
razzle-dazzle promotions of this kind.
200
00:11:12,051 --> 00:11:14,076
Three hundred bucks
on the table.
201
00:11:17,056 --> 00:11:20,457
One, two, three.
202
00:11:20,526 --> 00:11:22,016
Now, there could be a bonus
in this for you, Stevie,
203
00:11:22,095 --> 00:11:23,357
as soon as
the picture comes out.
204
00:11:23,429 --> 00:11:26,330
You might even be able to
get your plumbing fixed.
205
00:11:26,399 --> 00:11:28,026
Now, what do you say?
Last chance.
206
00:11:35,508 --> 00:11:37,476
Tell me some more
about Betsy Blake.
207
00:11:48,121 --> 00:11:49,486
Well, look,
I gotta be knocking off.
208
00:11:49,555 --> 00:11:51,420
I'll leave the tools
inside there for you.
209
00:11:51,491 --> 00:11:53,891
You know it gets dark pretty
early down here in November.
210
00:11:54,594 --> 00:11:57,495
You don't get lonesome down
here all by yourself, do you?
211
00:11:57,730 --> 00:11:59,595
Nah, it's one
of those things.
212
00:11:59,665 --> 00:12:04,466
Well, uh-oh, I forgot
about Friday night.
213
00:12:04,971 --> 00:12:06,438
That must be
the genius.
214
00:12:10,576 --> 00:12:13,010
I don't see no chorus line
of broads down there.
215
00:12:13,079 --> 00:12:14,307
You think he's sick?
216
00:12:14,380 --> 00:12:15,642
You'll have to ask him.
217
00:12:15,982 --> 00:12:18,644
He's got a convertible out there
as long as a hook and ladder.
218
00:12:19,385 --> 00:12:22,411
Public Relations Manager
for Goliath Pictures, huh?
219
00:12:23,656 --> 00:12:26,124
Well, Steve, tell me
something, will ya?
220
00:12:26,325 --> 00:12:29,021
How does a young punk his age
hold on to a job like that?
221
00:12:29,562 --> 00:12:31,427
You think he knows where
some bodies are buried?
222
00:12:31,497 --> 00:12:34,523
You got me. I'll let you
know if I ever find out.
223
00:12:35,168 --> 00:12:36,760
I'll see ya.
224
00:12:37,070 --> 00:12:39,061
Alfredo, my good man,
how are ya?
225
00:12:44,744 --> 00:12:45,972
What's with him?
226
00:12:46,045 --> 00:12:49,208
His daughter brought home Love
Secrets From Beyond The Grave.
227
00:12:49,282 --> 00:12:51,113
You're kidding?
228
00:12:51,284 --> 00:12:54,720
Hey, you know those phony fan
clubs I organized eight weeks ago?
229
00:12:54,787 --> 00:12:57,187
That I remember. Well,
they ain't phony no more.
230
00:12:57,390 --> 00:13:00,291
I got 50,000
love-sick volunteers
231
00:13:00,359 --> 00:13:03,328
gazing into their tea leaves and
their Betsy Blake voodoo rings.
232
00:13:03,396 --> 00:13:04,863
You think
I'm kidding you?
233
00:13:04,931 --> 00:13:06,899
What about
your conscience?
234
00:13:07,233 --> 00:13:08,632
My what?
Oh, my conscience.
235
00:13:08,701 --> 00:13:10,191
Oh, yeah,
I forgot to tell ya,
236
00:13:10,603 --> 00:13:14,061
I swapped it to the Daughters
of Salvation for a bass drum.
237
00:13:15,975 --> 00:13:18,569
We open up nation-wide
next week, Stevie-boy.
238
00:13:18,945 --> 00:13:21,812
No sneak previews or test
patterns for my sky-rocket.
239
00:13:21,881 --> 00:13:24,714
Just solid bookings
right across the nation.
240
00:13:25,251 --> 00:13:28,379
You think M.P. doesn't know
who wrapped this package up?
241
00:13:28,621 --> 00:13:31,613
I've got a contract in my pocket
that he gave me this afternoon.
242
00:13:32,058 --> 00:13:33,787
I don't wanna shock ya, pal.
243
00:13:34,060 --> 00:13:37,723
But the salary figures read like
the roundtrip mileage to the moon.
244
00:13:38,030 --> 00:13:39,554
Congratulations.
245
00:13:42,502 --> 00:13:45,266
Love Secrets From Beyond The
Grave. How do you like that?
246
00:13:45,338 --> 00:13:47,101
And Madame Mystery,
no less.
247
00:13:47,173 --> 00:13:49,607
And I Was Betsy Blake's
Astrologist.
248
00:13:49,675 --> 00:13:51,666
I'm telling you,
it's killing me.
249
00:13:52,411 --> 00:13:55,938
The best thing that washed-out,
platinum-rinsed old pelican
250
00:13:56,015 --> 00:13:59,917
ever did in her life was to ram her
speedboat into that jerk from Pasadena.
251
00:13:59,986 --> 00:14:01,078
What was... Mr...
252
00:14:01,154 --> 00:14:03,588
Mr. Fryer,
of Pasadena, Jimmy.
253
00:14:03,956 --> 00:14:06,447
Mr. Louis Fryer
was the gentleman's name.
254
00:14:08,694 --> 00:14:11,754
I think the next episode should
be the cutest one, don't you?
255
00:14:12,231 --> 00:14:14,699
The Return of Betsy Blake.
256
00:14:20,973 --> 00:14:23,203
Do you have to stare
at me like that?
257
00:14:24,510 --> 00:14:26,944
It's not possible.
You've got no right...
258
00:14:27,013 --> 00:14:30,312
Sure, it was thoughtless of
me. I should have stayed dead.
259
00:14:30,516 --> 00:14:33,280
Old bag comes stumbling back after 90 days,
260
00:14:33,352 --> 00:14:36,685
with her hair three different colors,
and a poached-egg look in each eye.
261
00:14:36,756 --> 00:14:40,283
Listen, I... Don't say any
more. Just keep your mouth shut!
262
00:14:44,897 --> 00:14:48,389
You've got a kind face, dear.
Stupid but compassionate.
263
00:14:49,535 --> 00:14:51,765
You got a little drink for
little ol' Madame Mystery?
264
00:14:52,171 --> 00:14:53,661
There's some...
265
00:14:53,739 --> 00:14:56,367
Don't apologize
to Betsy, angel-boy.
266
00:14:56,442 --> 00:14:57,739
I spotted it already.
267
00:14:57,843 --> 00:14:59,708
This all you got?
I'm afraid so.
268
00:15:00,313 --> 00:15:02,281
I'm sorry to take
all your vitamins, dear.
269
00:15:02,515 --> 00:15:04,881
Remind me to get you
a case some day.
270
00:15:10,223 --> 00:15:12,054
That's much, much better.
271
00:15:12,124 --> 00:15:14,388
I haven't had a drink
in an hour and a half.
272
00:15:15,528 --> 00:15:19,225
Well, Junior, maybe I can tell
you what this is all about.
273
00:15:19,498 --> 00:15:23,195
Actually, well, the newspapers
didn't have anything right,
274
00:15:23,269 --> 00:15:26,295
except Louie Fryer's
name and my own.
275
00:15:26,539 --> 00:15:28,063
I had to laugh!
276
00:15:28,140 --> 00:15:30,131
Laugh someplace else.
Come on, let's get...
277
00:15:30,576 --> 00:15:32,544
No, no, no, let her talk.
278
00:15:34,413 --> 00:15:36,244
You weren't
in a speedboat accident?
279
00:15:36,315 --> 00:15:38,909
Oh, sure!
We hit, all right.
280
00:15:39,051 --> 00:15:42,817
I went into Louie Fryer and
his girlfriend like a torpedo.
281
00:15:43,256 --> 00:15:46,089
"The Blonde Torpedo,"
they used to call me.
282
00:15:46,158 --> 00:15:47,250
You remember that, Jim?
283
00:15:47,326 --> 00:15:49,453
Louie Fryer's girlfriend?
What girlfriend?
284
00:15:49,528 --> 00:15:52,793
Well, like I was gonna tell
you, see, there was this doll.
285
00:15:53,065 --> 00:15:56,501
Some floozy that he must've
picked up on the beach.
286
00:15:56,569 --> 00:15:59,868
That was Louie Fryer
for you, every time.
287
00:16:00,206 --> 00:16:03,607
She was blonde, and so I supposed
people figured her for me.
288
00:16:04,010 --> 00:16:06,535
Especially after
seven days in the water.
289
00:16:07,413 --> 00:16:08,573
Go on.
290
00:16:08,648 --> 00:16:10,946
This is gonna
kill you, Junior.
291
00:16:11,017 --> 00:16:13,485
There must've been a lot of cork
in the stuff I drank that day
292
00:16:13,586 --> 00:16:15,520
because I just wasn't
easy to sink.
293
00:16:17,957 --> 00:16:19,652
A fishing trawler
picked me up.
294
00:16:20,192 --> 00:16:22,820
An old tub out of San Diego
with a new coat of paint.
295
00:16:24,497 --> 00:16:27,022
Must have looked
a little bit like me, huh?
296
00:16:27,800 --> 00:16:30,166
Well, anyway, it was on its way to Seattle.
297
00:16:30,836 --> 00:16:33,828
A Swede by the name of Eric
fished me out of the channel.
298
00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:37,505
He was sort of a blonde
Humphrey Bogart with muscles.
299
00:16:38,177 --> 00:16:41,237
He mixed his own
booze in an oil drum.
300
00:16:42,882 --> 00:16:44,907
We were the only ones
on board.
301
00:16:45,384 --> 00:16:48,182
Best three months I had
in my whole life.
302
00:16:48,454 --> 00:16:49,819
It's not possible.
303
00:16:50,022 --> 00:16:51,546
It's just not possible!
304
00:16:51,957 --> 00:16:55,484
Well, you stick to your dreams,
Junior, and I'll stick to mine.
305
00:16:58,631 --> 00:17:00,929
It was a whole week before
we saw the Seattle newspapers.
306
00:17:01,467 --> 00:17:05,836
Eric brought a stack onboard and laughed
and I thought we'd split the deck.
307
00:17:05,905 --> 00:17:07,998
I shouldn't imitate
Eric's accent,
308
00:17:08,307 --> 00:17:11,606
but when he said,
"Where do we go from here?"
309
00:17:12,244 --> 00:17:14,439
I took one look at that
Nordic rooster
310
00:17:14,513 --> 00:17:18,882
and said, "As far away from Goliath
Studios as you can sail this tub!"
311
00:17:19,285 --> 00:17:20,274
So we took off.
312
00:17:20,886 --> 00:17:21,875
For three months?
313
00:17:22,888 --> 00:17:26,119
Why not? First vacation I've
ever had in my whole life.
314
00:17:26,425 --> 00:17:29,826
Nobody around to say,
"Betsy, watch the calories."
315
00:17:29,895 --> 00:17:34,855
"Betsy, lay off the grape."
So what if I did gain weight?
316
00:17:35,501 --> 00:17:38,561
We'd have been gone three years
if he hadn't run out of cash,
317
00:17:39,004 --> 00:17:42,599
and I plan to change that just as
soon as I get to my safe deposit box.
318
00:17:44,477 --> 00:17:48,573
But there's one thing, Junior.
You did a great publicity job!
319
00:17:49,849 --> 00:17:52,977
I especially enjoyed the
accounts of my own funeral.
320
00:17:53,285 --> 00:17:55,219
I like the magazine
articles, too.
321
00:17:55,488 --> 00:17:58,821
Love Secrets From
Beyond The Grave.
322
00:17:59,024 --> 00:18:00,992
Eric liked
that one, too.
323
00:18:02,628 --> 00:18:05,654
What's the matter? You don't
look happy, Jim-precious.
324
00:18:06,165 --> 00:18:07,655
Should I? Now?
325
00:18:08,768 --> 00:18:10,065
Come on, I need a drink more than you do.
326
00:18:10,136 --> 00:18:13,833
Well, anybody's booze
is better than no booze.
327
00:18:17,176 --> 00:18:19,701
I'll see you later, Steve, there'll
be something I wanna talk to you about.
328
00:18:19,779 --> 00:18:20,768
You know what I mean?
329
00:18:29,755 --> 00:18:32,451
So? Looks like a course built for goats.
330
00:18:32,591 --> 00:18:34,889
Not a goat as old
as this one, huh?
331
00:18:35,594 --> 00:18:37,027
You had to ruin it,
didn't ya?
332
00:18:37,096 --> 00:18:39,564
You had to come back and
hog your way into the act?
333
00:18:39,698 --> 00:18:40,995
Well I had it made.
Do you hear me?
334
00:18:41,066 --> 00:18:43,500
I had it all wrapped up at
Goliath. I was man of the year,
335
00:18:43,569 --> 00:18:45,935
until you come in here looking
like something from Halloween.
336
00:18:46,005 --> 00:18:47,768
Thank you. Tell me more.
337
00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:49,974
I'll tell you more, but it
won't be any news to you.
338
00:18:50,042 --> 00:18:52,033
You had to come back
and take your curtain call.
339
00:18:52,111 --> 00:18:54,909
And take the shine off the only
success I ever made on my own.
340
00:18:55,080 --> 00:18:56,411
Well, that's Betsy for you.
341
00:18:56,482 --> 00:18:58,040
Good ol' Betsy Blake.
342
00:18:58,117 --> 00:19:00,711
Well, I worked like a pig in
a pit to put this promotion on.
343
00:19:00,786 --> 00:19:02,447
I went without rest
for 90 days
344
00:19:02,521 --> 00:19:04,421
to turn an old crow like
you into a bird of paradise.
345
00:19:04,490 --> 00:19:08,722
And, whammy, right into the tin can
the old crow comes stumbling home.
346
00:19:09,128 --> 00:19:11,756
You are sweet, Jimmy.
Real sweet.
347
00:19:12,465 --> 00:19:13,796
I should have
remembered that.
348
00:19:13,899 --> 00:19:15,423
Well, if you don't
believe me, ask M.P.
349
00:19:15,501 --> 00:19:17,765
He told me this afternoon, that
when they talk about legends,
350
00:19:17,837 --> 00:19:19,930
they're not gonna talk about
Valentino or Jimmy Dean,
351
00:19:20,105 --> 00:19:22,596
they're gonna say it all started
with Jimmy Dolan and Betsy Blake.
352
00:19:22,975 --> 00:19:25,375
I turned your rotten picture
into a guaranteed success.
353
00:19:25,444 --> 00:19:26,877
That's who did it! Me! Me!
354
00:19:26,946 --> 00:19:28,811
I made your... Took your
nickelodeon talent
355
00:19:28,881 --> 00:19:31,076
and turned it into the kind of
success that the public would buy...
356
00:19:31,183 --> 00:19:34,050
Listen, you couldn't have gotten into
Goliath Studios with a pistol and a crowbar,
357
00:19:34,119 --> 00:19:36,019
if it hadn't have
been for me.
358
00:19:36,088 --> 00:19:38,454
You had the brains of a moth
and the personality of a cobra
359
00:19:38,524 --> 00:19:40,754
when I went to M.P. and told
him he had to give you a job.
360
00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:44,324
What do you want me to do for
you I haven't done already?
361
00:20:20,032 --> 00:20:22,057
Hey, what's
the matter with you?
362
00:20:24,203 --> 00:20:25,500
Where's Betsy?
363
00:20:28,340 --> 00:20:30,467
What makes you think that
old dame was Betsy Blake?
364
00:20:30,576 --> 00:20:34,376
Come on. Come off it. How
many drinks did you have?
365
00:20:34,647 --> 00:20:35,636
Suppose...
366
00:20:36,549 --> 00:20:39,677
Suppose for the sake of an idea
I had, suppose it wasn't her.
367
00:20:40,352 --> 00:20:42,582
Look, I've been to the
movies too many times.
368
00:20:42,655 --> 00:20:44,555
Why, her voice,
the way she talks...
369
00:20:50,462 --> 00:20:52,123
Where is Betsy now?
370
00:20:54,733 --> 00:20:58,829
There was an accident.
It wasn't my fault.
371
00:20:59,471 --> 00:21:00,870
She was hurt?
372
00:21:03,242 --> 00:21:04,641
Is she dead?
373
00:21:09,014 --> 00:21:10,140
Well, is she?
374
00:21:10,215 --> 00:21:12,274
Steve, you've got to help me.
Like I said, it wasn't my fault.
375
00:21:12,351 --> 00:21:13,579
She had it coming to her.
376
00:21:13,652 --> 00:21:14,949
Yeah, Jimmy?
377
00:21:15,154 --> 00:21:17,679
I don't mean that. What I
mean... I mean, she was drunk.
378
00:21:18,090 --> 00:21:20,684
Steve, you gotta help me.
She tripped and she fell.
379
00:21:21,860 --> 00:21:24,693
Why did you
kill her? Why?
380
00:21:27,666 --> 00:21:30,829
The greatest publicity job
in the last 20 years,
381
00:21:31,637 --> 00:21:34,834
and she turns it
into a farce!
382
00:21:37,509 --> 00:21:39,443
Do you know for certain
that she's dead?
383
00:21:43,882 --> 00:21:46,544
She's dead, all right.
384
00:21:51,457 --> 00:21:54,221
I tried to... I tried to
drag her away from my place,
385
00:21:55,060 --> 00:21:56,584
but I couldn't.
386
00:21:56,795 --> 00:21:58,922
I heard people
walking along the beach,
387
00:21:59,331 --> 00:22:01,731
and I got scared
and I came here.
388
00:22:01,934 --> 00:22:04,164
Steve, you gotta help me!
Please! Sure, I'll help you.
389
00:22:04,236 --> 00:22:05,601
You're such
a real nice kid.
390
00:22:05,671 --> 00:22:07,502
I'll call the cops and have
them come and take the body away.
391
00:22:09,541 --> 00:22:11,600
Steve, she's no good.
She's a drunk.
392
00:22:11,744 --> 00:22:13,177
She's a lie.
She's no good.
393
00:22:13,312 --> 00:22:17,112
I've got five grand home. $5,000 that
I got as a bonus from this campaign.
394
00:22:17,216 --> 00:22:18,740
It's all yours,
if you'll just help me!
395
00:22:19,618 --> 00:22:22,678
As far as anybody's concerned, Betsy
Blake's been dead for three months!
396
00:22:22,888 --> 00:22:26,847
You could help me. Help me move the
body and put it in the trunk of my car.
397
00:22:33,465 --> 00:22:34,989
Give me the police.
398
00:22:37,970 --> 00:22:42,373
You'd kill your own mother to be a big
man at Goliath Studios, wouldn't you?
399
00:22:51,717 --> 00:22:53,048
My mother?
400
00:22:56,488 --> 00:22:58,820
That's right, Stevie,
401
00:23:00,559 --> 00:23:02,493
but how did you know
that's who she was?
402
00:23:16,709 --> 00:23:19,906
So much for our ode
to mother love.
403
00:23:20,245 --> 00:23:24,682
I must say, it was a pleasant
change to meet Jimmy Dolan.
404
00:23:24,750 --> 00:23:28,516
Here's a boy unsullied
by any Oedipus complex,
405
00:23:28,654 --> 00:23:31,384
not tied by any silver cord,
406
00:23:31,457 --> 00:23:34,756
unfettered by any
sentimental claptrap.
407
00:23:35,294 --> 00:23:38,991
Just a healthy, happy,
well-adjusted killer.
408
00:23:39,565 --> 00:23:41,396
It's all very refreshing.
409
00:23:41,900 --> 00:23:46,394
And now for those of you who are
accustomed to enjoying television,
410
00:23:46,472 --> 00:23:50,272
here is something that is
also refreshingly different.
411
00:23:50,809 --> 00:23:52,538
After which, I'll be back.
412
00:23:55,848 --> 00:23:59,750
By the way, I am no longer
in the credit card business.
413
00:24:00,486 --> 00:24:02,886
Someone was
flooding the country
414
00:24:02,955 --> 00:24:06,015
with exact reproductions
of our cards.
415
00:24:06,692 --> 00:24:09,252
When I discovered the
culprit was the government,
416
00:24:09,728 --> 00:24:12,253
I thought it best
to bow out gracefully.
417
00:24:13,232 --> 00:24:14,699
As for our story,
418
00:24:14,833 --> 00:24:18,428
I must say it was a pleasant
change to meet Jimmy Dolan.
419
00:24:19,037 --> 00:24:22,905
Here was a boy unsullied
by any Oedipus complex,
420
00:24:23,175 --> 00:24:25,666
not tied by any silver cord,
421
00:24:25,744 --> 00:24:28,804
unfettered by any
sentimental claptrap.
422
00:24:29,615 --> 00:24:32,914
Just a healthy, happy,
well-adjusted killer.
423
00:24:33,652 --> 00:24:37,019
However, Jimmy subsequently
had a bit of bad luck.
424
00:24:37,556 --> 00:24:43,290
He met with an accident in his
home, and died as a result of a fall.
425
00:24:43,829 --> 00:24:46,229
He tripped over his grandmother
while he was attempting
426
00:24:46,298 --> 00:24:48,528
to throw her down
a flight of stairs.
427
00:24:49,067 --> 00:24:50,227
Very sad.
428
00:24:50,636 --> 00:24:54,902
Next time, I shall return with
another story equally uplifting.
429
00:24:55,240 --> 00:24:57,231
Until then, goodnight.
35627
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