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1
00:00:01,333 --> 00:00:03,368
And we go now live to Crimson Fox
2
00:00:03,370 --> 00:00:04,570
for an announcement.
3
00:00:04,572 --> 00:00:08,006
[sighs] Man, this is tough.
4
00:00:08,008 --> 00:00:10,341
Starting today, I'll
be leaving Charm City
5
00:00:10,343 --> 00:00:12,590
and taking my talents to Metropolis.
6
00:00:12,593 --> 00:00:14,546
- [crowd groans]
- Adjacent.
7
00:00:14,548 --> 00:00:17,982
I can't believe she's just leaving us.
8
00:00:17,984 --> 00:00:19,984
I mean, she is our main hero.
9
00:00:19,986 --> 00:00:22,019
What if somebody like the Joker attacks?
10
00:00:22,021 --> 00:00:23,721
The Joker is an A-list super villain.
11
00:00:23,723 --> 00:00:25,890
He wouldn't attack a
dump like Charm City.
12
00:00:25,892 --> 00:00:29,727
We begged for a WNBA team, Emily.
13
00:00:29,729 --> 00:00:31,361
They said no.
14
00:00:31,363 --> 00:00:33,698
A WNBA team.
15
00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:35,164
Now that Crimson Fox is leaving,
16
00:00:35,166 --> 00:00:37,033
maybe we'll get a cool new superhero.
17
00:00:37,035 --> 00:00:39,235
- What if we got Aqualad?
- Aqualad?
18
00:00:39,237 --> 00:00:41,104
No, Aqualad's a sidekick, not a hero.
19
00:00:41,106 --> 00:00:43,690
That's like hoping our city gets
protection from a cheese plate.
20
00:00:43,693 --> 00:00:45,008
- [both laugh]
- He's right.
21
00:00:45,010 --> 00:00:46,876
It's cool that you guys
can laugh about this,
22
00:00:46,878 --> 00:00:50,113
but with Crimson Fox gone,
petty crime will skyrocket,
23
00:00:50,115 --> 00:00:53,015
and let's be real: women
are always the target.
24
00:00:53,017 --> 00:00:54,449
Emily is right.
25
00:00:54,451 --> 00:00:56,719
The creeps are already
feeling emboldened.
26
00:00:56,721 --> 00:01:00,055
Weird Tony the hot dog guy
was extra weird this morning.
27
00:01:00,057 --> 00:01:03,525
Wait a minute, you mean
Fun Tony the hot dog guy.
28
00:01:03,527 --> 00:01:05,476
Yeah, what's wrong with
Fun Tony the hot dog guy?
29
00:01:05,479 --> 00:01:06,895
Yeah?
30
00:01:06,897 --> 00:01:11,232
All: "Hey, sexy lady,
come sit on Tony's lap
31
00:01:11,234 --> 00:01:14,468
and touch Tony's hot dog."
32
00:01:14,470 --> 00:01:16,636
Oh, he's definitely
talking about his penis.
33
00:01:16,639 --> 00:01:17,651
Yeah, that's his penis.
34
00:01:17,654 --> 00:01:19,573
All right, look, if
you're worried about crime,
35
00:01:19,576 --> 00:01:21,290
I can walk you guys
to your car at night.
36
00:01:21,292 --> 00:01:24,692
I mean, I don't look
intimidating, but...
37
00:01:26,715 --> 00:01:28,314
But what?
38
00:01:28,316 --> 00:01:30,050
I was hoping someone would disagree.
39
00:01:30,052 --> 00:01:31,384
Who cares?
40
00:01:31,386 --> 00:01:32,619
It's going to be fine.
41
00:01:32,621 --> 00:01:35,221
You ladies need to grow a pair.
42
00:01:35,223 --> 00:01:36,823
All of you.
43
00:01:36,825 --> 00:01:38,992
[insect buzzing]
44
00:01:38,994 --> 00:01:40,872
Jackie, there's a bee in my office!
45
00:01:40,875 --> 00:01:42,207
Aah, aah!
46
00:01:42,210 --> 00:01:44,843
Jackie! It looks stingy!
47
00:01:44,845 --> 00:01:46,912
Our fearless leader.
48
00:01:46,914 --> 00:01:49,948
[heroic music]
49
00:01:49,950 --> 00:01:56,889
50
00:02:12,719 --> 00:02:17,141
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
51
00:02:19,544 --> 00:02:21,344
Hey, you know, I was
thinking about taking
52
00:02:21,346 --> 00:02:23,914
a self-defense class now
that Crimson Fox is gone.
53
00:02:23,916 --> 00:02:25,415
Want to do it with me?
54
00:02:25,417 --> 00:02:27,132
Look, I don't have time for some class.
55
00:02:27,135 --> 00:02:28,635
I'm either taking care of a child...
56
00:02:28,638 --> 00:02:29,732
Jackie!
57
00:02:29,734 --> 00:02:30,933
Or I'm at home with my kid.
58
00:02:30,935 --> 00:02:32,401
I thought you might say that,
59
00:02:32,403 --> 00:02:34,603
so I already found us
a class during lunch.
60
00:02:34,605 --> 00:02:36,238
I'll take care of everything.
61
00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:38,682
All you need to do is show up.
62
00:02:38,685 --> 00:02:41,276
There's a chance you'll
get to punch a stranger.
63
00:02:41,278 --> 00:02:42,611
Jackie, hurry!
64
00:02:42,613 --> 00:02:44,412
All right, I'm in.
65
00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:45,380
[upbeat music]
66
00:02:45,382 --> 00:02:46,381
Yah, yah!
67
00:02:46,383 --> 00:02:47,882
Jackie!
68
00:02:47,884 --> 00:02:49,917
69
00:02:49,919 --> 00:02:52,286
The bee did not lay eggs in your hair.
70
00:02:52,288 --> 00:02:54,021
I Googled it. It's impossible.
71
00:02:54,023 --> 00:02:57,059
No, something horrible has happened.
72
00:02:57,062 --> 00:02:58,625
Round up the floor.
73
00:02:58,628 --> 00:03:00,861
74
00:03:00,863 --> 00:03:02,463
A violation has occurred.
75
00:03:02,465 --> 00:03:04,265
At approximately 10:02 this morning,
76
00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:05,932
I walked into my personal bathroom
77
00:03:05,934 --> 00:03:07,968
to discover evidence
78
00:03:07,970 --> 00:03:10,903
that it had been used by another.
79
00:03:13,508 --> 00:03:15,441
Why is no one gasping? Gasp.
80
00:03:15,443 --> 00:03:18,010
[all gasp]
81
00:03:18,012 --> 00:03:19,945
Thank you, I feel the same way.
82
00:03:19,947 --> 00:03:22,649
Before today, the only cheeks
that had graced that throne
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00:03:22,651 --> 00:03:24,317
belonged to me
84
00:03:24,319 --> 00:03:28,119
and, of course, my beloved
golden retriever, Boomer,
85
00:03:28,121 --> 00:03:31,490
whom I painstakingly
taught to go human-style
86
00:03:31,492 --> 00:03:33,858
before he promptly ran away.
87
00:03:33,860 --> 00:03:36,695
Now, I promise you that
justice will be swift and fair.
88
00:03:36,697 --> 00:03:38,129
You will be fired.
89
00:03:39,933 --> 00:03:41,700
So please step forward
90
00:03:41,702 --> 00:03:44,302
and take your punishment with dignity.
91
00:03:47,807 --> 00:03:48,919
No one?
92
00:03:50,610 --> 00:03:52,142
No one?
93
00:03:52,144 --> 00:03:53,444
Dorothy...
94
00:03:53,446 --> 00:03:54,679
was it you?
95
00:03:54,681 --> 00:03:56,380
Looking a little depleted,
96
00:03:56,382 --> 00:04:00,183
a little "Turder, She
Wrote," maybe, hmm?
97
00:04:00,185 --> 00:04:02,452
A little "Law & Order: IBS"?
98
00:04:04,523 --> 00:04:06,189
That is a guilty face.
99
00:04:06,191 --> 00:04:10,227
Okay, okay, I will flush you out.
100
00:04:10,229 --> 00:04:12,295
And then you'll be fired.
101
00:04:12,297 --> 00:04:16,965
102
00:04:16,967 --> 00:04:19,468
Hey, have you seen Jackie?
103
00:04:19,470 --> 00:04:21,169
Who's "Bitch I'ma"?
104
00:04:21,171 --> 00:04:23,805
Oh, it makes more sense
when Jackie wears hers.
105
00:04:23,807 --> 00:04:25,841
- "Bitch I'ma End You!"
- [laughs]
106
00:04:25,843 --> 00:04:27,710
We're taking self-defense classes.
107
00:04:27,712 --> 00:04:30,011
If she ever gets here.
108
00:04:30,013 --> 00:04:33,314
"I'ma Bitch"? Hmm, inappropriate, Emily.
109
00:04:33,316 --> 00:04:35,550
Appreciate the honesty, but still...
110
00:04:35,552 --> 00:04:36,884
inappropriate.
111
00:04:36,886 --> 00:04:38,720
- [sighs]
- You think Jackie's
112
00:04:38,722 --> 00:04:41,689
gonna take self-defense classes
in matching shirts with you?
113
00:04:41,691 --> 00:04:43,591
Well, it's sort of,
like, an inside joke.
114
00:04:43,593 --> 00:04:45,627
I don't think Jackie does inside jokes.
115
00:04:45,629 --> 00:04:48,363
Well, that's because
you're not on the inside.
116
00:04:48,365 --> 00:04:51,465
Me and Jackie, we've got our own thing.
117
00:04:51,467 --> 00:04:52,932
And yet she's not here.
118
00:04:52,934 --> 00:04:55,602
Well, she probably just
decided to meet me there.
119
00:04:55,604 --> 00:04:59,406
So I'm gonna go learn
to kick ass with Jackie.
120
00:04:59,408 --> 00:05:02,409
[light music]
121
00:05:02,411 --> 00:05:03,744
[sighs]
122
00:05:05,714 --> 00:05:07,546
Emily?
123
00:05:07,548 --> 00:05:08,581
Hi.
124
00:05:08,583 --> 00:05:10,416
Whoa, that class is no joke.
125
00:05:10,418 --> 00:05:11,884
Yeah, well, Jackie didn't show,
126
00:05:11,886 --> 00:05:13,586
and on my way back,
I ran into an alleyway
127
00:05:13,588 --> 00:05:15,755
to avoid one of
Jack-O-Lantern's fireballs
128
00:05:15,757 --> 00:05:17,456
and tripped and fell into the trash.
129
00:05:17,458 --> 00:05:21,226
Oh, sexy lady covered in garbage.
130
00:05:21,228 --> 00:05:23,095
Still sexy. [chuckles]
131
00:05:23,097 --> 00:05:24,796
Not now, Tony.
132
00:05:24,798 --> 00:05:26,898
Yeah, that is disrespectful, Tony!
133
00:05:28,402 --> 00:05:30,902
- Mm?
- I can't believe it.
134
00:05:30,904 --> 00:05:33,305
Jackie knew how much I was
looking forward to this class,
135
00:05:33,307 --> 00:05:34,839
and she just stands me up?
136
00:05:34,841 --> 00:05:36,641
Well, maybe she had an emergency,
137
00:05:36,643 --> 00:05:40,044
or maybe she's sitting in a
car over there reading a book.
138
00:05:40,046 --> 00:05:42,012
What?
139
00:05:42,014 --> 00:05:43,580
140
00:05:43,582 --> 00:05:45,416
[exhales deeply]
141
00:05:46,125 --> 00:05:47,182
- [thud]
- [shrieks]
142
00:05:47,185 --> 00:05:48,519
Self-defense class!
143
00:05:48,521 --> 00:05:50,120
Where the hell were you?
144
00:05:50,122 --> 00:05:52,589
I was busy. I figured
you'd just go alone.
145
00:05:52,591 --> 00:05:54,858
[sniffs] Why do you smell like garbage?
146
00:05:54,860 --> 00:05:56,660
Actually, can we talk about this later?
147
00:05:56,662 --> 00:05:59,228
No, we're talking about this right now.
148
00:05:59,230 --> 00:06:01,130
Friends don't stand each other up.
149
00:06:01,132 --> 00:06:02,998
They send a text with enough sad emojis
150
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:05,335
to make you feel how sorry they are.
151
00:06:05,337 --> 00:06:06,336
[door slides open]
152
00:06:06,338 --> 00:06:07,503
[shrieks]
153
00:06:09,941 --> 00:06:12,342
Is this an UberPOOL?
'Cause I didn't select pool.
154
00:06:12,345 --> 00:06:13,394
It is not a pool.
155
00:06:13,397 --> 00:06:15,610
I was just telling this
little homeless lady
156
00:06:15,612 --> 00:06:17,479
to get out of my car.
157
00:06:17,481 --> 00:06:19,848
I'm trying to make a little
extra cash on the side, okay?
158
00:06:19,850 --> 00:06:21,950
Why didn't you just tell me that?
159
00:06:21,952 --> 00:06:23,452
So are we going or what?
160
00:06:23,454 --> 00:06:26,087
You heard her. Get out
of my car, sporty hobo.
161
00:06:27,758 --> 00:06:29,257
Tiny water bottle?
162
00:06:29,259 --> 00:06:30,258
[door slams]
163
00:06:30,260 --> 00:06:32,827
164
00:06:36,645 --> 00:06:40,286
[tense music]
165
00:06:40,288 --> 00:06:41,921
166
00:06:41,923 --> 00:06:44,256
Jackie, I'm not sure why you... Ow!
167
00:06:44,258 --> 00:06:45,424
Ow, ow, ow, ow,
168
00:06:45,426 --> 00:06:46,759
ow, ow, ow, ow,
169
00:06:46,761 --> 00:06:49,696
ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
170
00:06:49,698 --> 00:06:52,264
I'm gonna be direct, which is
something you love about me.
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00:06:52,266 --> 00:06:53,365
Oh, yeah.
172
00:06:53,367 --> 00:06:54,667
My daughter Ruby's class
173
00:06:54,669 --> 00:06:56,768
is taking a trip to
Six Flags Metropolis.
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00:06:56,770 --> 00:06:59,270
It's $500, and money's
a little tight right now.
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00:06:59,272 --> 00:07:01,940
I really don't need any of these
human bedbugs knowing that,
176
00:07:01,942 --> 00:07:05,844
so as far as you're concerned,
I am not an Uber driver.
177
00:07:05,846 --> 00:07:07,779
Yeah, but with Crimson Fox gone,
178
00:07:07,781 --> 00:07:10,782
you could get mugged or get hit
by Jack-O-Lantern's fireball.
179
00:07:10,784 --> 00:07:13,751
It's just not safe for you to
be driving strangers around.
180
00:07:13,753 --> 00:07:14,919
- All right.
- Aah!
181
00:07:14,921 --> 00:07:16,220
Who drives strangers around?
182
00:07:16,222 --> 00:07:18,455
No one, not one person ever.
183
00:07:19,558 --> 00:07:20,725
Where'd you learn that?
184
00:07:20,727 --> 00:07:22,036
[sighs] I have two brothers.
185
00:07:22,039 --> 00:07:23,928
Oh, you have two
brothers? Older or younger?
186
00:07:23,930 --> 00:07:25,307
Please stop bonding with me.
187
00:07:25,310 --> 00:07:27,698
- Listen, if you need...
- I don't want to talk about it,
188
00:07:27,700 --> 00:07:30,900
and I really don't want
you to "Emily" this.
189
00:07:30,902 --> 00:07:34,370
Aww, people are using my name as a verb?
190
00:07:34,372 --> 00:07:37,040
Aah! I will not Emily this.
191
00:07:37,042 --> 00:07:39,209
So I don't want to
make this a big thing,
192
00:07:39,211 --> 00:07:41,077
but someone who I'm not going to mention
193
00:07:41,079 --> 00:07:42,311
needs a little help.
194
00:07:42,313 --> 00:07:45,338
Oh, are you trying to Emily something?
195
00:07:45,341 --> 00:07:46,882
Look, we're not gonna
give money to Jackie
196
00:07:46,884 --> 00:07:47,862
unless we know what it's for.
197
00:07:47,864 --> 00:07:49,818
Well, she told me not to... Damn it.
198
00:07:49,820 --> 00:07:51,419
- Oh.
- I knew it was Jackie.
199
00:07:51,421 --> 00:07:53,555
Now, that was some David Blaine [bleep].
200
00:07:53,557 --> 00:07:55,057
Okay, this cannot be repeated.
201
00:07:55,059 --> 00:07:57,226
Her kid needs $500 for a school trip.
202
00:07:57,228 --> 00:07:58,994
I thought we could all
pitch in to help her out.
203
00:07:58,996 --> 00:08:00,428
Jackie is never gonna take our money.
204
00:08:00,430 --> 00:08:02,197
She is crazy private.
205
00:08:02,199 --> 00:08:04,198
I have a pretty genius way around that.
206
00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:05,833
- Oh, so you're gonna Teddy it.
- What's that?
207
00:08:05,835 --> 00:08:06,685
- Well, that's...
- That's when you try
208
00:08:06,687 --> 00:08:09,203
to turn your name into
a verb unsuccessfully.
209
00:08:09,205 --> 00:08:10,304
[laughter]
210
00:08:10,306 --> 00:08:12,473
Ooh, you just got Wendy-ed.
211
00:08:12,475 --> 00:08:13,975
[laughter]
212
00:08:13,977 --> 00:08:16,769
Everyone in my office except I'ma Bitch.
213
00:08:16,772 --> 00:08:18,138
You can stay here.
214
00:08:18,141 --> 00:08:20,140
That's not even what the shirt said.
215
00:08:21,261 --> 00:08:23,183
The Three Amigos,
216
00:08:23,185 --> 00:08:25,285
the Three Musketeers,
217
00:08:25,287 --> 00:08:27,821
the Dynamic Duo...
218
00:08:27,823 --> 00:08:29,722
and you.
219
00:08:29,724 --> 00:08:31,557
I bet you thought you were in the clear,
220
00:08:31,559 --> 00:08:33,894
but you're the only three
people who were in the office
221
00:08:33,896 --> 00:08:35,361
when the crime was committed.
222
00:08:35,363 --> 00:08:38,463
I know. I checked the logs.
223
00:08:38,465 --> 00:08:40,766
[chortles] I just want to point out
224
00:08:40,768 --> 00:08:42,534
that we're talking about a poop crime,
225
00:08:42,536 --> 00:08:44,636
and you said "logs."
226
00:08:44,638 --> 00:08:46,772
[all chuckling]
227
00:08:46,774 --> 00:08:47,795
That's fair.
228
00:08:49,610 --> 00:08:50,810
Who did this?
229
00:08:50,812 --> 00:08:52,644
Van, this is silly. It wasn't us.
230
00:08:52,646 --> 00:08:55,713
Pedro, could you come in here, please?
231
00:08:57,984 --> 00:08:59,550
It's, uh, Peter, sir.
232
00:08:59,552 --> 00:09:01,252
Pedro, when you entered
233
00:09:01,254 --> 00:09:03,754
into my personal bathroom
yesterday to clean it,
234
00:09:03,756 --> 00:09:05,211
what did you find?
235
00:09:05,214 --> 00:09:06,930
Oh, there were these small scissors
236
00:09:06,933 --> 00:09:08,666
and all these clumps
of short, curly hairs
237
00:09:08,669 --> 00:09:10,094
all around the base of the bowl.
238
00:09:10,096 --> 00:09:11,161
Not that!
239
00:09:11,163 --> 00:09:12,996
I told you, not that. Wh...
240
00:09:12,998 --> 00:09:14,266
The other thing.
241
00:09:16,668 --> 00:09:18,001
This magazine, sir.
242
00:09:18,003 --> 00:09:19,502
Thank you, Pedrito.
243
00:09:19,504 --> 00:09:20,503
It's Peter.
244
00:09:20,505 --> 00:09:22,439
Witness excused.
245
00:09:22,441 --> 00:09:23,673
Adios.
246
00:09:23,675 --> 00:09:26,643
Who does this belong to?
247
00:09:26,645 --> 00:09:29,568
Who was perusing while
they were number twos-ing?
248
00:09:31,045 --> 00:09:32,815
Come on, people, I'm
giving you an opportunity
249
00:09:32,817 --> 00:09:33,865
to snitch on a friend.
250
00:09:33,868 --> 00:09:36,018
I used to live for
this in boarding school.
251
00:09:37,889 --> 00:09:39,322
None of us did it.
252
00:09:39,324 --> 00:09:40,701
All right.
253
00:09:40,704 --> 00:09:43,759
You're sticking together, okay.
254
00:09:43,761 --> 00:09:45,093
No, well, let's see how long that lasts
255
00:09:45,095 --> 00:09:47,162
once I move your workspaces...
256
00:09:47,164 --> 00:09:50,665
to Conference Room... B.
257
00:09:50,667 --> 00:09:53,301
[screams]
258
00:09:54,905 --> 00:09:56,604
Wait, what's Conference Room B?
259
00:09:56,606 --> 00:09:57,939
[door creaks]
260
00:09:57,941 --> 00:09:59,107
[ominous music]
261
00:09:59,109 --> 00:10:00,541
Oh. [chuckles]
262
00:10:00,543 --> 00:10:02,176
Please, come in.
263
00:10:02,178 --> 00:10:04,578
Take in your surroundings,
264
00:10:04,580 --> 00:10:08,182
because this hellscape is
where you will be living
265
00:10:08,184 --> 00:10:10,684
until someone tells me who did it.
266
00:10:10,686 --> 00:10:13,354
Um, okay, so, uh, what was so bad
267
00:10:13,356 --> 00:10:15,289
about this conference room, again?
268
00:10:15,291 --> 00:10:19,392
I think you may have noticed
the terrifying lighting.
269
00:10:22,264 --> 00:10:24,397
[Van laughs maniacally]
270
00:10:24,399 --> 00:10:25,491
Oh, come on.
271
00:10:25,494 --> 00:10:26,933
- Yeah, that's it.
- That's it.
272
00:10:26,935 --> 00:10:28,701
Well, let me tell you this.
273
00:10:28,703 --> 00:10:31,204
These chairs... are the old ones,
274
00:10:31,206 --> 00:10:32,438
before the upgrade.
275
00:10:32,440 --> 00:10:34,908
They're unable to spin.
276
00:10:34,910 --> 00:10:36,909
Actually, you need to
just reach back here,
277
00:10:36,911 --> 00:10:39,311
hit this little doohickey, and...
278
00:10:39,313 --> 00:10:40,946
you could go wherever you want.
279
00:10:40,948 --> 00:10:41,947
- I got it.
- Hee!
280
00:10:41,949 --> 00:10:44,616
Yeah, whee!
281
00:10:44,618 --> 00:10:46,218
- Whee!
- Whee!
282
00:10:46,220 --> 00:10:47,519
[phone clatters]
283
00:10:49,957 --> 00:10:52,090
All right, "whee" all you want,
284
00:10:52,092 --> 00:10:55,293
but let me put this
little notion in your ear.
285
00:10:55,295 --> 00:10:57,094
No one crosses Vanderveer Wayne
286
00:10:57,096 --> 00:11:00,398
and gets out clean on the other side.
287
00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:02,599
It's about to get nasty.
288
00:11:02,601 --> 00:11:05,102
289
00:11:05,104 --> 00:11:06,537
[door slams]
290
00:11:07,974 --> 00:11:09,640
all: Whee!
291
00:11:09,642 --> 00:11:11,090
[laughter]
292
00:11:14,361 --> 00:11:16,181
[bell rings]
293
00:11:16,184 --> 00:11:17,980
Hi there, are you Mrs. Fry?
294
00:11:17,982 --> 00:11:19,916
Yes, are... Are you a parent?
295
00:11:19,918 --> 00:11:21,984
[laughs] Me, a parent?
296
00:11:21,986 --> 00:11:24,319
That's hilarious. I'm super young.
297
00:11:24,321 --> 00:11:26,388
Look, uh, one of my good
friends has a daughter
298
00:11:26,390 --> 00:11:27,755
in your class, Ruby?
299
00:11:27,757 --> 00:11:29,490
- Mm-hmm.
- I just wanted to drop off
300
00:11:29,492 --> 00:11:31,092
this check, you know, on the down-low
301
00:11:31,094 --> 00:11:32,160
for her class trip.
302
00:11:32,162 --> 00:11:33,728
What class trip?
303
00:11:33,730 --> 00:11:36,798
Uh, you're all going
to Six Flags Metropolis.
304
00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:40,302
We're all going to Six Flags Metropolis!
305
00:11:40,304 --> 00:11:41,501
All: Yay!
306
00:11:41,503 --> 00:11:43,637
No! No, class, calm down.
307
00:11:43,639 --> 00:11:45,839
We are not going to
Six Flags Metropolis.
308
00:11:45,841 --> 00:11:47,641
[all groan]
309
00:11:47,643 --> 00:11:50,077
Look, I don't know what kind
of sick joke you're playing.
310
00:11:50,079 --> 00:11:51,511
This is a public school.
311
00:11:51,513 --> 00:11:53,447
We don't go to Six Flags Metropolis.
312
00:11:53,449 --> 00:11:56,683
We go to cemeteries and read sad poems.
313
00:11:56,685 --> 00:11:58,017
Leave.
314
00:11:58,019 --> 00:12:00,186
[growls]
315
00:12:03,758 --> 00:12:06,025
All right, Operation:
Help Jackie is over.
316
00:12:06,027 --> 00:12:08,161
Now we're doing Operation:
Mind Your Own Business
317
00:12:08,163 --> 00:12:09,595
and Just Act Cool.
318
00:12:09,597 --> 00:12:11,297
Okay, so you want us to un-Emily this?
319
00:12:11,299 --> 00:12:12,932
Um, I don't think acting cool
320
00:12:12,934 --> 00:12:15,367
is the opposite of Emily-ing something.
321
00:12:16,937 --> 00:12:18,803
All: No.
322
00:12:18,805 --> 00:12:20,772
Mm-mm.
323
00:12:20,774 --> 00:12:22,574
So we're good on dropping this?
324
00:12:22,576 --> 00:12:23,908
I was trying to be a good friend,
325
00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:25,110
and I just went too far.
326
00:12:25,112 --> 00:12:26,611
Jackie is my friend,
327
00:12:26,613 --> 00:12:28,913
and if she needs my
help, she'll come to me.
328
00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:31,649
The important thing
is that no one mentions
329
00:12:31,651 --> 00:12:33,817
that I went to her daughter's school.
330
00:12:33,819 --> 00:12:36,187
That's the lady!
331
00:12:36,189 --> 00:12:39,823
She's the one who said we
were going to Six Flags.
332
00:12:39,825 --> 00:12:42,326
Oh, my God, Jackie! [chuckles nervously]
333
00:12:42,328 --> 00:12:43,861
Is this your daughter
334
00:12:43,863 --> 00:12:46,130
who I am definitely
meeting for the first time?
335
00:12:46,132 --> 00:12:49,132
[dramatic music]
336
00:12:49,134 --> 00:12:52,234
337
00:12:52,237 --> 00:12:55,938
[lamp creaking]
338
00:12:55,940 --> 00:12:58,008
Um, Van, this is ridiculous.
339
00:12:58,010 --> 00:13:00,810
Teddy, you're a dignified guy.
340
00:13:00,812 --> 00:13:03,546
You wouldn't crap up
another man's toilet.
341
00:13:03,548 --> 00:13:05,715
But Ron?
342
00:13:05,717 --> 00:13:09,521
How much do we really know about... Ron?
343
00:13:09,524 --> 00:13:11,920
Lives with his grandma,
favorite food is pickles,
344
00:13:11,922 --> 00:13:13,822
birthday wish is always for
"Jurassic Park" to be real.
345
00:13:13,824 --> 00:13:15,870
Enough! No one has to know.
346
00:13:18,062 --> 00:13:20,129
Tell me it was Ron.
347
00:13:20,131 --> 00:13:23,164
348
00:13:23,166 --> 00:13:24,383
Pick it... pick it up!
349
00:13:24,386 --> 00:13:27,200
That's the... I... That's why I slid it.
350
00:13:27,203 --> 00:13:30,071
351
00:13:30,073 --> 00:13:32,380
$1,000 to Furniture Within Grasp?
352
00:13:32,383 --> 00:13:33,141
Mm.
353
00:13:33,144 --> 00:13:35,143
This could buy a whole
folding chair or an ottoman.
354
00:13:35,145 --> 00:13:36,577
And all of that can be yours
355
00:13:36,579 --> 00:13:38,646
if you just set the truth free.
356
00:13:38,648 --> 00:13:40,480
The truth is a little bird.
357
00:13:40,482 --> 00:13:42,315
It's cooped up in a cage.
358
00:13:42,317 --> 00:13:44,751
It's either open that door, set it free,
359
00:13:44,753 --> 00:13:48,488
let it fly out on the wings of...
360
00:13:48,490 --> 00:13:49,889
feathers... I don't...
361
00:13:49,891 --> 00:13:51,391
It's a bird, so it... I don't know.
362
00:13:51,393 --> 00:13:54,027
Just... look, it's 1,000 bucks.
363
00:13:54,029 --> 00:13:55,995
Grasp the furniture.
364
00:13:55,997 --> 00:13:58,931
365
00:13:58,933 --> 00:14:00,732
Teddy ratted you out.
366
00:14:00,734 --> 00:14:02,568
What? He did?
367
00:14:02,570 --> 00:14:05,904
Yup, he sold you out faster
than a Mumford & Sons concert
368
00:14:05,906 --> 00:14:07,706
in the whitest part of Portland.
369
00:14:07,708 --> 00:14:09,275
You could just say "Portland."
370
00:14:09,277 --> 00:14:11,043
He says it's you.
371
00:14:11,045 --> 00:14:14,112
Unless, of course, he's
lying to cover his own ass.
372
00:14:15,715 --> 00:14:18,183
Or maybe it's no one's friend, Wendy.
373
00:14:18,185 --> 00:14:21,352
374
00:14:21,354 --> 00:14:25,190
Wendy. Wendy, Wendy, Wendy.
375
00:14:25,192 --> 00:14:28,059
Tell me, Wendy,
376
00:14:28,061 --> 00:14:32,411
why does Wendy always pretend-y?
377
00:14:34,567 --> 00:14:37,701
- Are we flirting?
- What?
378
00:14:37,703 --> 00:14:39,769
- Finally.
- No.
379
00:14:39,771 --> 00:14:41,805
Hello.
380
00:14:41,807 --> 00:14:43,440
Hmm?
381
00:14:43,442 --> 00:14:44,975
Keep it on. Keep it on. Keep it on.
382
00:14:44,977 --> 00:14:48,011
383
00:14:48,013 --> 00:14:49,278
Missed you at coffee.
384
00:14:49,280 --> 00:14:51,981
I got you one anyways.
385
00:14:51,983 --> 00:14:56,085
Okay, obviously, you're
still needing space.
386
00:14:56,087 --> 00:14:58,254
You know, I just want
to say I've forgiven you
387
00:14:58,256 --> 00:15:01,457
for lying to me about needing
the money for Six Flags...
388
00:15:01,459 --> 00:15:03,459
- Seriously?
- And I want you to know that
389
00:15:03,461 --> 00:15:05,994
I don't expect you to tell
me why you need the money,
390
00:15:05,996 --> 00:15:08,497
but I am available to you as a friend.
391
00:15:08,499 --> 00:15:10,465
And that's the last thing I will say.
392
00:15:10,467 --> 00:15:11,466
[elevator dings]
393
00:15:11,468 --> 00:15:13,668
394
00:15:13,670 --> 00:15:16,704
Okay, the last thing I'll say
is, I think it would be a shame
395
00:15:16,706 --> 00:15:19,007
if a misunderstanding
that was born out of love
396
00:15:19,009 --> 00:15:21,143
had a negative effect on
a blossoming friendship
397
00:15:21,145 --> 00:15:23,010
that could be great for the both of us.
398
00:15:23,012 --> 00:15:25,078
There is nothing blossoming here.
399
00:15:25,080 --> 00:15:27,348
We work together. That's it.
400
00:15:27,350 --> 00:15:29,783
I don't want you butting into my life.
401
00:15:29,785 --> 00:15:31,952
- Leave me alone.
- Jackie, wait...
402
00:15:31,954 --> 00:15:34,121
I don't need your help.
403
00:15:36,526 --> 00:15:37,525
[rumbling]
404
00:15:37,527 --> 00:15:39,459
[evil laughter]
405
00:15:39,461 --> 00:15:41,827
Citizens of Charm City,
406
00:15:41,829 --> 00:15:45,532
where is your beloved Crimson Fox now?
407
00:15:45,534 --> 00:15:48,501
[explosion, glass shattering]
408
00:15:48,503 --> 00:15:50,970
Buckle up! [laughs evilly]
409
00:15:55,011 --> 00:15:56,778
[light music]
410
00:15:56,781 --> 00:15:59,025
You just got a little bump on the head.
411
00:15:59,028 --> 00:15:59,988
You're all set to leave.
412
00:15:59,991 --> 00:16:01,460
We called your emergency contact.
413
00:16:01,462 --> 00:16:02,962
My emergency contact?
414
00:16:02,964 --> 00:16:05,164
Who did I put down for my...
415
00:16:05,166 --> 00:16:06,165
Oh, no.
416
00:16:06,167 --> 00:16:07,767
Jackie!
417
00:16:07,769 --> 00:16:10,970
I am so flattered and
also so glad you're okay.
418
00:16:10,972 --> 00:16:13,238
Calm down, I had to put somebody down,
419
00:16:13,241 --> 00:16:15,906
and you're kind of sort
of reliable and capable
420
00:16:15,908 --> 00:16:18,474
in a middle school hall
monitor kind of way.
421
00:16:18,476 --> 00:16:20,610
Oh, locker break-ins
dropped 24% on my watch.
422
00:16:20,612 --> 00:16:22,612
I have no doubt they did.
423
00:16:22,614 --> 00:16:24,981
Look, I know I overstepped my bounds...
424
00:16:24,983 --> 00:16:26,649
Yeah, you did.
425
00:16:26,650 --> 00:16:31,253
But maybe I have too
many bounds to step over.
426
00:16:31,256 --> 00:16:33,689
So do you want to know
what that money's for?
427
00:16:33,691 --> 00:16:35,257
I mean...
428
00:16:35,259 --> 00:16:37,126
Night classes.
429
00:16:37,128 --> 00:16:39,494
I don't want to spend the
rest of my life helping Van
430
00:16:39,496 --> 00:16:42,932
with his poop witch-hunts,
so I'm trying to get my MBA.
431
00:16:42,934 --> 00:16:44,266
I didn't want to tell you because...
432
00:16:44,268 --> 00:16:46,668
Oh, my God, Jackie, that is so amazing.
433
00:16:46,670 --> 00:16:48,003
Because of that.
434
00:16:48,005 --> 00:16:49,537
I don't like that kind of attention.
435
00:16:49,539 --> 00:16:51,973
The attention of people
who love and care for you?
436
00:16:51,975 --> 00:16:53,607
I'm not saying it's healthy.
437
00:16:53,609 --> 00:16:56,044
If I'm being honest, it
would probably be good for me
438
00:16:56,046 --> 00:16:58,779
to be friends with someone like you.
439
00:16:58,781 --> 00:17:01,682
But if you could just turn
the volume down a little?
440
00:17:01,684 --> 00:17:04,319
You want people to
lean in, not lean out.
441
00:17:04,321 --> 00:17:07,054
See, I like having a
friend who can tell me that.
442
00:17:07,056 --> 00:17:09,456
And I like having a friend
who would probably notice
443
00:17:09,458 --> 00:17:11,325
if I was dead in my apartment.
444
00:17:11,327 --> 00:17:12,559
Well, what about your kid?
445
00:17:12,561 --> 00:17:13,693
She has an iPad.
446
00:17:13,695 --> 00:17:15,729
Oh.
447
00:17:15,731 --> 00:17:19,166
Could we maybe, like, hug?
448
00:17:19,168 --> 00:17:20,433
Make it quick.
449
00:17:22,404 --> 00:17:24,003
Oh, really quick.
450
00:17:25,907 --> 00:17:29,909
Oh, Jackie is getting her MBA
451
00:17:29,911 --> 00:17:31,410
-
And she
- Turn it down.
452
00:17:31,412 --> 00:17:33,846
[whispering]
Called
me as her emergency
453
00:17:33,848 --> 00:17:35,248
- Turn it off.
- Contact.
454
00:17:35,250 --> 00:17:38,050
- Drive me home.
- Anytime.
455
00:17:38,052 --> 00:17:40,051
How much for the Eames lounger?
456
00:17:40,053 --> 00:17:42,720
Okay, and can I get
that with a cup holder?
457
00:17:42,722 --> 00:17:44,990
Traitor and tacky.
458
00:17:44,992 --> 00:17:46,424
Hey, what's happening?
459
00:17:46,426 --> 00:17:47,893
Oh, I'll tell you what's happening.
460
00:17:47,895 --> 00:17:49,560
Wendy's weak, and she sold one of us out
461
00:17:49,562 --> 00:17:50,828
for a fricking gift card.
462
00:17:50,830 --> 00:17:52,764
I did not sell anybody out.
463
00:17:52,766 --> 00:17:54,832
I bet you're the one
who used Van's toilet
464
00:17:54,834 --> 00:17:57,001
and you're trying to
throw people off the scent
465
00:17:57,003 --> 00:17:58,335
by blaming me.
466
00:17:58,337 --> 00:18:00,137
You know I can't use a work bathroom.
467
00:18:00,139 --> 00:18:02,039
That's why I have to drive
home at lunch every day.
468
00:18:02,041 --> 00:18:03,740
And you know that I
can't go to the bathroom
469
00:18:03,742 --> 00:18:05,209
unless there are people around
470
00:18:05,211 --> 00:18:07,744
to give me a sense of
comfort and security.
471
00:18:07,746 --> 00:18:09,546
- You've been there!
- I do know that.
472
00:18:09,548 --> 00:18:11,215
- That's a very strange thing.
- Well, does that...
473
00:18:11,217 --> 00:18:12,316
Enough!
474
00:18:12,318 --> 00:18:14,117
We're all friends here,
475
00:18:14,119 --> 00:18:16,652
and Van is tearing us apart.
476
00:18:16,654 --> 00:18:18,254
And I'm putting an end to it.
477
00:18:18,256 --> 00:18:21,224
478
00:18:21,226 --> 00:18:23,592
You put the pig in the pit
479
00:18:23,594 --> 00:18:25,494
And then you eat it
480
00:18:25,496 --> 00:18:27,096
It's just indigenous
481
00:18:27,098 --> 00:18:28,798
It's not mischievous
482
00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:30,300
Van?
483
00:18:30,302 --> 00:18:32,167
I pooped in your toilet.
484
00:18:32,169 --> 00:18:36,438
Finally, the truth comes out.
485
00:18:36,440 --> 00:18:40,442
Ron, your punishment will
be of biblical proportions.
486
00:18:40,444 --> 00:18:42,744
Van, I pooped in your toilet.
487
00:18:42,746 --> 00:18:44,913
No, I pooped in your toilet.
488
00:18:44,915 --> 00:18:49,050
All three of you defecated in my toilet?
489
00:18:49,052 --> 00:18:51,919
Simultaneously?
490
00:18:51,921 --> 00:18:54,355
You are some dirty birdies.
491
00:18:54,357 --> 00:18:56,490
No, this is a gesture.
We're sticking together.
492
00:18:56,492 --> 00:18:57,925
If you want to punish one of us,
493
00:18:57,927 --> 00:18:59,327
you're gonna have to punish us all.
494
00:18:59,329 --> 00:19:00,828
Haven't you ever seen "Spartacus"?
495
00:19:00,830 --> 00:19:03,064
Thank you for ruining
"Spartacus" for me.
496
00:19:03,066 --> 00:19:04,365
[computer pings]
497
00:19:04,367 --> 00:19:08,001
Ah, they found the security footage
498
00:19:08,003 --> 00:19:10,003
of who crapped up my toilet.
499
00:19:10,005 --> 00:19:12,405
Now we'll know for sure.
500
00:19:12,407 --> 00:19:15,008
Jackie, there's a bee! It looks stingy!
501
00:19:15,010 --> 00:19:16,276
Okay, ignore that.
502
00:19:16,278 --> 00:19:17,477
[laughter]
503
00:19:17,479 --> 00:19:18,911
Jackie!
504
00:19:18,913 --> 00:19:20,613
- I'm meditating.
- Jackie, is it on me?
505
00:19:20,615 --> 00:19:22,381
It was above the desk!
506
00:19:22,383 --> 00:19:24,016
It's in the room!
507
00:19:24,018 --> 00:19:25,517
Do you see it?
508
00:19:25,519 --> 00:19:26,986
Huh.
509
00:19:26,988 --> 00:19:29,154
[thud]
510
00:19:29,156 --> 00:19:30,622
Did you get it?
511
00:19:30,624 --> 00:19:32,324
- It's dead.
- Oh.
512
00:19:32,326 --> 00:19:35,027
So no one pooped in your toilet.
513
00:19:35,029 --> 00:19:36,828
- Thank you.
- Jackie just used that magazine
514
00:19:36,830 --> 00:19:38,897
to kill a bee and left it there.
515
00:19:39,966 --> 00:19:41,966
That's right.
516
00:19:41,968 --> 00:19:44,369
I knew this all along.
517
00:19:44,371 --> 00:19:49,307
This was me teaching you
a very convoluted lesson...
518
00:19:49,309 --> 00:19:50,608
about friendship.
519
00:19:50,610 --> 00:19:53,644
- Hmm.
- Thank you.
520
00:19:53,646 --> 00:19:56,613
[playful music]
521
00:19:58,227 --> 00:19:59,692
Look at us.
522
00:19:59,695 --> 00:20:01,385
I'm only wearing this because I got
523
00:20:01,387 --> 00:20:03,153
the instructor's blood on the other one.
524
00:20:03,155 --> 00:20:06,656
Ooh, sexy ladies
wearing matching shirts.
525
00:20:06,658 --> 00:20:08,992
Hey, how about a matching foot-long?
526
00:20:08,994 --> 00:20:10,127
[chuckles]
527
00:20:10,129 --> 00:20:11,128
What the...
528
00:20:11,130 --> 00:20:12,229
Ow, ow!
529
00:20:12,231 --> 00:20:14,230
This stops now.
530
00:20:14,232 --> 00:20:16,165
Yeah, Tony, you got that?
531
00:20:16,167 --> 00:20:18,467
[squeaky voice] I got it.
Let go, please. It hurts.
532
00:20:18,469 --> 00:20:20,036
[whimpers]
533
00:20:20,038 --> 00:20:22,638
[dramatic music]
534
00:20:22,640 --> 00:20:24,306
You know this is our
last Tony dog, right?
535
00:20:24,308 --> 00:20:25,580
Yeah, I know.
536
00:20:25,583 --> 00:20:27,576
It's so hard to divorce
the artist from his work.
537
00:20:27,578 --> 00:20:29,412
Mm-hmm.
538
00:20:29,414 --> 00:20:30,845
Mmm.
539
00:20:30,847 --> 00:20:32,414
- But it's so good.
- It's so good!
540
00:20:32,416 --> 00:20:33,515
[suspenseful music]
541
00:20:33,517 --> 00:20:36,518
[video squealing]
542
00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:43,458
543
00:20:57,712 --> 00:21:00,600
_
544
00:21:00,603 --> 00:21:02,709
My name is Peter.
545
00:21:02,711 --> 00:21:08,757
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
546
00:21:08,807 --> 00:21:13,357
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
38107
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