Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,333 --> 00:00:03,333
Hello, young man.
How are you today?
2
00:00:03,910 --> 00:00:07,370
Fine. Would you care to make
a charitable donation towards...
3
00:00:07,417 --> 00:00:08,577
No, thanks, sorry.
4
00:00:08,578 --> 00:00:10,178
I haven't said what it's for yet.
5
00:00:10,218 --> 00:00:11,518
Yeah, but it will be a no, though.
6
00:00:11,545 --> 00:00:13,705
We're in a bit of a rush.
No, we're not. Are we not?
7
00:00:13,745 --> 00:00:16,345
Oh well, if you're not...
Because you have that audition.
8
00:00:16,385 --> 00:00:18,865
We've got loads of time.
What are you collecting for?
9
00:00:18,905 --> 00:00:21,225
Our injured and retired servicemen,
darling.
10
00:00:21,265 --> 00:00:23,225
Here's 10 denari.
11
00:00:23,265 --> 00:00:24,905
10? That's quite a lot.
12
00:00:24,945 --> 00:00:26,545
Thank you, love.
13
00:00:26,585 --> 00:00:28,585
And you, sir?
14
00:00:28,898 --> 00:00:30,898
Yes, OK, fine.
15
00:00:31,458 --> 00:00:33,178
Here's another 10, then.
16
00:00:33,218 --> 00:00:36,618
Splendid! And here are your
I Helped Conquer Britain badges.
17
00:00:38,418 --> 00:00:40,418
Thanks.
18
00:00:41,698 --> 00:00:43,858
OK, so you're gonna have
to get our money back.
19
00:00:43,898 --> 00:00:45,738
Really, why?
20
00:00:45,778 --> 00:00:49,458
My family are in Britain, I'm not
helping to conquer it. Get it back.
21
00:00:49,498 --> 00:00:52,138
I just don't think that's really
the done thing, though.
22
00:00:52,178 --> 00:00:54,218
Quickly. Please. Before we lose him.
23
00:00:56,098 --> 00:00:57,858
OK. Sorry!
24
00:00:57,898 --> 00:00:59,698
Hello. Sorry, hi.
25
00:00:59,738 --> 00:01:02,578
Hello again. We didn't
realise, she's actually from Britain
26
00:01:02,618 --> 00:01:04,538
so we are gonna need to
get that money back.
27
00:01:04,578 --> 00:01:06,178
It's already in the tin.
28
00:01:06,218 --> 00:01:08,378
Yeah, but you can open
the tin, though, surely?
29
00:01:08,418 --> 00:01:10,938
No. You can. Otherwise
you would be able to bank it.
30
00:01:10,978 --> 00:01:13,418
Oh, so you're the fucking
tin expert suddenly, are you?
31
00:01:13,458 --> 00:01:15,658
No, no.
I just... If I could just have it.
32
00:01:15,978 --> 00:01:18,498
Get your bloody hands off my tin.
I'm sure if I can just.
33
00:01:18,538 --> 00:01:20,138
Get back, you little ponce!
34
00:01:20,178 --> 00:01:22,298
All right, calm down.
What's going on?
35
00:01:24,298 --> 00:01:25,978
Agghh! Oh, my God!
36
00:01:26,018 --> 00:01:27,658
Help, help, help.
37
00:01:27,698 --> 00:01:29,258
Not the face.
Help!
38
00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:30,372
Not the face.
39
00:01:30,373 --> 00:01:45,418
40
00:01:47,778 --> 00:01:50,778
It looks like your eye
is sort of growing a plum.
41
00:01:50,818 --> 00:01:52,378
Right, thanks for that, Grumio.
42
00:01:52,418 --> 00:01:54,418
You know,
you should really report that guy.
43
00:01:54,458 --> 00:01:57,338
Well, I would, but
you know, it's a bit embarrassing,
44
00:01:57,378 --> 00:01:59,978
because, you know,
he was sort of older than me.
45
00:02:00,058 --> 00:02:02,898
Why is that embarrassing?
Because he's much older.
46
00:02:03,218 --> 00:02:05,738
How much older?
Well it's hard to say exactly.
47
00:02:06,418 --> 00:02:10,658
Yeah, but probably
around 50 years...
48
00:02:10,698 --> 00:02:12,578
50 years old or 50 years older?
49
00:02:12,618 --> 00:02:14,938
Hmm, yeah, older.
He was in his seventies?
50
00:02:15,498 --> 00:02:18,698
Well, early seventies and he was
very sprightly, to be fair to him.
51
00:02:18,738 --> 00:02:21,058
Oh, that's not cool.
I'm not saying it's cool, am I?
52
00:02:21,098 --> 00:02:23,618
That's older than my nan
and she needs help out the bath.
53
00:02:23,658 --> 00:02:25,298
Don't compare him to your nan, OK.
54
00:02:25,338 --> 00:02:27,778
This guy was a veteran, you know,
he's a trained killer.
55
00:02:27,818 --> 00:02:29,498
Yeah, but trained when?
Like ages ago?
56
00:02:29,538 --> 00:02:32,818
It doesn't matter, does it?
Once you're trained, you're trained.
57
00:02:32,858 --> 00:02:35,578
What did Cynthia make of it?
Well, she did dab my face.
58
00:02:35,618 --> 00:02:38,098
Hey, result! Yeah, but
then she called me a poor lamb.
59
00:02:38,138 --> 00:02:40,138
Oh, no.
I know. Of all the animals.
60
00:02:40,978 --> 00:02:42,978
No-one wants to fuck a lamb.
61
00:02:43,418 --> 00:02:45,938
I'm not sure I'm really cut out
for this. For what?
62
00:02:45,978 --> 00:02:47,698
I don't know, life.
63
00:02:47,738 --> 00:02:49,338
Oh, come on, man, it will pick up.
64
00:02:49,378 --> 00:02:51,578
You know, one door closes
and another door opens.
65
00:02:51,618 --> 00:02:55,738
You reckon? Because right now
it's more like one door gets repeatedly slammed into my nuts.
66
00:02:55,778 --> 00:02:57,778
'Ey up.
67
00:03:07,858 --> 00:03:10,378
So, this is the
dining room/conference area.
68
00:03:10,778 --> 00:03:13,378
Those tiles may look cracked,
but that's deliberate.
69
00:03:13,418 --> 00:03:15,018
That's actually a mosaic.
70
00:03:15,058 --> 00:03:17,058
Ah, landlord. Sorry!
71
00:03:17,298 --> 00:03:20,858
Oh, hello boys, all right?
Yeah, fine. Sorry, who is this?
72
00:03:20,898 --> 00:03:23,298
Oh, yes. Allow me
to introduce you to Irina.
73
00:03:23,498 --> 00:03:25,338
Lovely to meet you.
74
00:03:25,378 --> 00:03:26,978
Hi, hello, I'm Stylax.
75
00:03:27,018 --> 00:03:28,778
And what are those?
76
00:03:28,818 --> 00:03:30,778
Oh, and allow me to introduce
you to bananae.
77
00:03:30,818 --> 00:03:32,418
It's a fruit.
78
00:03:32,458 --> 00:03:35,458
They're very popular back home.
I'm trying to sell them here.
79
00:03:35,498 --> 00:03:37,338
Oh, amazing. Can I try a bit?
80
00:03:37,378 --> 00:03:39,378
Oh sure, of course.
81
00:03:41,618 --> 00:03:43,618
Hmm, that's gorgeous.
82
00:03:47,858 --> 00:03:50,058
Sorry? Sorry?
What the hell is going on?
83
00:03:50,418 --> 00:03:53,938
So, if you'd just like to step
into the bathroom/study for a sec.
84
00:03:55,338 --> 00:03:57,018
Here, keep it.
85
00:03:57,058 --> 00:03:59,058
I have many.
86
00:04:01,538 --> 00:04:02,898
So what happened to your face, then?
87
00:04:02,938 --> 00:04:05,018
He got beaten up by an old man.
Man! Just say man.
88
00:04:05,058 --> 00:04:06,698
Oh, dear. How old are we talking?
89
00:04:06,738 --> 00:04:08,458
Mid-seventies.
It's not important.
90
00:04:08,498 --> 00:04:10,338
Why is that woman in our bathroom?
91
00:04:10,378 --> 00:04:12,378
Ah, well, Irina's from Thrace,
92
00:04:12,778 --> 00:04:15,258
which you may have heard
we've just conquered.
93
00:04:15,298 --> 00:04:17,418
So now they're all flooding
over here.
94
00:04:17,498 --> 00:04:19,098
To our flat?
95
00:04:19,138 --> 00:04:22,898
Yeah, well she just needs
something temporary until her banana business gets going.
96
00:04:22,938 --> 00:04:24,498
I was gonna send her packing,
97
00:04:24,538 --> 00:04:26,738
but then I thought,
'Hang on a minute.
98
00:04:26,778 --> 00:04:30,338
The boys might wanna hold onto her.'
Ah, good thinking.
99
00:04:30,378 --> 00:04:32,018
Right, but for nothing?
100
00:04:32,058 --> 00:04:34,138
Oh, absolutely.
It won't cost you a thing.
101
00:04:34,178 --> 00:04:37,258
No, I mean, we pay the same rent
and have another person living here?
102
00:04:37,298 --> 00:04:38,978
Correct.
So what's in it for us?
103
00:04:39,018 --> 00:04:42,218
Well, she is. You know
what they say about Thracian women?
104
00:04:42,258 --> 00:04:44,138
No.
What do they say?
105
00:04:44,178 --> 00:04:45,778
Dirty.
Really?
106
00:04:45,818 --> 00:04:47,818
Oh, yeah, filthy in the bedroom.
107
00:04:49,018 --> 00:04:52,418
So what do you say? You interested?
Yes, we are. No, thank you.
108
00:04:52,498 --> 00:04:54,498
A quick word if I may.
109
00:04:58,418 --> 00:05:00,338
Where would she even stay?
We don't have a spare room.
110
00:05:00,378 --> 00:05:02,658
No, we don't need one,
because, right, hear me out.
111
00:05:02,698 --> 00:05:04,298
I've thought this through.
But how?
112
00:05:04,338 --> 00:05:06,018
We've only just met her.
113
00:05:06,058 --> 00:05:08,898
Yeah, but I've had this exact
fantasy loads, right?
114
00:05:08,978 --> 00:05:11,698
And what we do is we give her
my room and then I come in with you.
115
00:05:11,738 --> 00:05:13,858
Ah, no. No, no, we are not sharing
a bed.
116
00:05:14,018 --> 00:05:15,738
Yeah, but we won't have to,
not for long.
117
00:05:15,778 --> 00:05:17,738
Because, right,
here's the genius bit.
118
00:05:17,778 --> 00:05:19,778
Oh, I'm glad there's a genius bit.
There is.
119
00:05:19,818 --> 00:05:22,338
After, like, one or two nights
me and her get it on
120
00:05:22,378 --> 00:05:24,098
and then
I get my room back anyway.
121
00:05:24,138 --> 00:05:25,898
And what if she doesn't fancy you?
122
00:05:25,938 --> 00:05:27,658
What? One - she's filthy.
123
00:05:27,698 --> 00:05:29,298
Two - she does.
124
00:05:29,338 --> 00:05:30,938
Even you couldn't miss those vibes.
125
00:05:30,978 --> 00:05:33,938
I know you fancy her. She had you
eating out of her hand, literally.
126
00:05:33,978 --> 00:05:35,858
I'm not cleaning up
after someone else.
127
00:05:35,898 --> 00:05:37,658
I've got enough on my plate as it is.
128
00:05:37,698 --> 00:05:40,298
OK, look, look. Both of you,
stop cock blocking me.
129
00:05:40,338 --> 00:05:42,498
I'm not doing that.
I don't know how to do that.
130
00:05:42,538 --> 00:05:44,378
First, Cynthia's out of bounds.
131
00:05:44,418 --> 00:05:47,178
And now her. It's like
you're a human chastity belt, mate.
132
00:05:47,218 --> 00:05:50,578
You won't rest till you've cut off
my wang and locked me in a dungeon.
133
00:05:50,618 --> 00:05:53,018
OK, that is honestly
not my long-term plan.
134
00:05:53,058 --> 00:05:55,898
I just don't wanna live with
a random fruit seller from Thrace.
135
00:05:55,938 --> 00:05:58,538
Yeah, but, you know, she
is exactly what this place needs.
136
00:05:58,578 --> 00:06:00,578
You know, a woman's touch.
137
00:06:01,058 --> 00:06:02,778
And fruit!
138
00:06:02,818 --> 00:06:05,418
And she's nice.
OK, what are you basing that on?
139
00:06:08,218 --> 00:06:10,218
Irina, sorry.
Yes?
140
00:06:10,298 --> 00:06:12,298
You're nice, right?
Yes, very nice.
141
00:06:13,138 --> 00:06:15,138
Yeah.
142
00:06:16,018 --> 00:06:17,698
OK, well that checks out.
143
00:06:17,738 --> 00:06:19,858
Please let me keep
the dirty Thracian.
144
00:06:20,138 --> 00:06:22,858
I'll look after her.
Come on, man. Throw me a bone.
145
00:06:30,858 --> 00:06:32,498
No, I don't want to,
I don't want to.
146
00:06:32,538 --> 00:06:34,138
I don't like the look of it.
147
00:06:34,178 --> 00:06:36,778
Just try a bit. You're
trying to get it on my bloody face.
148
00:06:36,818 --> 00:06:38,618
Come on, just try a bit.
Stay away from me!
149
00:06:38,858 --> 00:06:40,818
All right, chill out.
I said I don't like it.
150
00:06:40,858 --> 00:06:43,298
Why is it penis-shaped anyway?
You're penis shaped.
151
00:06:43,338 --> 00:06:45,978
What? No, I'm not. You are actually.
I'm just standing up.
152
00:06:46,018 --> 00:06:48,498
An erect penis then.
I do not look like an erect penis.
153
00:06:48,538 --> 00:06:50,738
Oh, I don't know, water boy.
You are a bit of a prick!
154
00:06:50,778 --> 00:06:53,058
Water man. Copier,
what's wrong with your face?
155
00:06:53,098 --> 00:06:55,858
Yes, he claims to have slipped.
I did slip, it was an accident.
156
00:06:55,898 --> 00:06:59,218
Right, that sounds suspiciously
like the sort of thing abused wives say.
157
00:06:59,258 --> 00:07:01,658
Has Shredder been abusing you?
I would never do that.
158
00:07:01,698 --> 00:07:04,018
I clearly wouldn't
be the wife out of me and him, so...
159
00:07:04,058 --> 00:07:06,378
No, you are so the wife.
I'm pretty sure you are, mate.
160
00:07:06,418 --> 00:07:08,938
There's no way I'm the wife.
Yeah, you are, you are, yes.
161
00:07:08,978 --> 00:07:11,298
Put your face away. It's ghastly.
It's worse for me.
162
00:07:11,338 --> 00:07:13,138
Not really, you don't have
to look at it.
163
00:07:13,178 --> 00:07:15,458
Pop it on the table, there's a love.
You want me to?
164
00:07:15,498 --> 00:07:17,858
Pop it. Pop, pop, pop, pop, pop,
pop. Right, OK.
165
00:07:17,898 --> 00:07:20,098
Oh, my good jove, Shredder,
what are you doing?
166
00:07:20,138 --> 00:07:21,898
I'm eating a banana.
It's a new fruit.
167
00:07:21,938 --> 00:07:24,298
Well now,
that is glorious, isn't it?
168
00:07:24,338 --> 00:07:26,858
Can you get hold of one for me?
Hmm, yeah, sure.
169
00:07:29,018 --> 00:07:32,618
Maybe I got you wrong, Shredder.
Maybe you are the wife after all.
170
00:07:33,658 --> 00:07:35,658
Ha.
171
00:07:39,498 --> 00:07:41,098
It'll be like a slumber party.
172
00:07:41,138 --> 00:07:44,138
Having you in my bed is not a party
and I doubt I'll get to slumber.
173
00:07:44,178 --> 00:07:46,178
Of course you will.
I'll help you slumber.
174
00:07:46,218 --> 00:07:47,938
Just think of me as
a big teddy bear.
175
00:07:47,978 --> 00:07:51,098
A big naked teddy bear with herpes.
176
00:07:51,138 --> 00:07:53,458
Oh, one or two nights?
Max, two nights max.
177
00:07:53,898 --> 00:07:57,818
Wow, that's come up a treat, hasn't
it? I'm not sure it's a treat, but...
178
00:07:57,938 --> 00:07:59,578
Well, it is for me.
I feel awful.
179
00:07:59,618 --> 00:08:02,058
It was my fault you got duffed up
in the first place.
180
00:08:02,098 --> 00:08:04,338
He didn't duff me up.
He just caught me by surprise.
181
00:08:04,378 --> 00:08:07,498
Several times. Yeah, they're pretty
stealthy these 90-year-olds?
182
00:08:07,538 --> 00:08:09,138
What? You said 70.
Cynth said 90.
183
00:08:09,178 --> 00:08:11,258
Yeah, well he wasn't.
Yeah, well we don't know.
184
00:08:11,298 --> 00:08:14,098
All right, Mets, leave him alone,
he's a poor lamb.
185
00:08:14,138 --> 00:08:17,578
I'm really not a poor lamb.
I just feel bad that Cynthia missed her audition.
186
00:08:17,618 --> 00:08:20,258
Oh, don't worry, I managed
to re-arrange it for tomorrow.
187
00:08:20,298 --> 00:08:22,058
Oh, cool, I'll come with you.
188
00:08:22,098 --> 00:08:25,018
OK, great. Maybe wait outside
just because of the whole...
189
00:08:25,058 --> 00:08:27,058
Yeah, will do.
190
00:08:28,618 --> 00:08:30,618
Oi, oi.
191
00:08:34,418 --> 00:08:36,738
I guess I could make my move
on her tonight.
192
00:08:37,138 --> 00:08:39,098
Just sleepwalk into my old room
and be like,
193
00:08:39,138 --> 00:08:41,138
'Oh, sorry, Irina, force of habit.'
194
00:08:41,178 --> 00:08:44,738
I don't think force of habit is
a valid excuse for sexual assault.
195
00:08:44,778 --> 00:08:48,738
Yeah. She'll probably just
invite me in anyway. Dirty minx.
196
00:08:53,138 --> 00:08:54,818
Where is she? She's here, right?
197
00:08:54,858 --> 00:08:56,538
Oh, yeah. And then some.
198
00:08:56,578 --> 00:08:58,298
How's my breath?
199
00:08:58,338 --> 00:08:59,898
Ooh! Hot and bananary.
200
00:08:59,938 --> 00:09:01,538
Perfect.
201
00:09:01,578 --> 00:09:03,578
Boys! Here she is.
You are home.
202
00:09:06,378 --> 00:09:08,378
Oh, hi.
203
00:09:08,418 --> 00:09:10,418
Wow.
204
00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:12,778
Really?
205
00:09:12,818 --> 00:09:14,538
Hello!
206
00:09:14,578 --> 00:09:16,178
Oh. Yeah.
207
00:09:16,218 --> 00:09:18,258
Erm, what?
This is my husband, Cosmo.
208
00:09:19,698 --> 00:09:21,698
Your... Husband.
Cosmo!
209
00:09:22,738 --> 00:09:24,698
Ah, no.
210
00:09:24,738 --> 00:09:29,938
Great to meet you. We're
going to have such fun time, huh?
211
00:09:39,258 --> 00:09:41,258
Two nights max!
212
00:09:42,098 --> 00:09:43,898
It might take a bit longer.
Oh, you think?
213
00:09:43,938 --> 00:09:45,738
This wasn't part
of your fantasy, then?
214
00:09:45,778 --> 00:09:48,458
The sexy new flatmate has
a massive pony-tailed husband?
215
00:09:48,498 --> 00:09:52,178
Not really. It's bonkers
our landlord never mentioned him, innit?
216
00:09:52,218 --> 00:09:55,138
Really bonkers, Grumio.
Really battleship mental.
217
00:09:55,418 --> 00:09:57,418
Oh, come on, mate. Hurry up.
218
00:10:03,698 --> 00:10:05,698
Oh, I think
this might be the finale.
219
00:10:11,338 --> 00:10:13,338
Hmm, might be doing an encore.
220
00:10:15,458 --> 00:10:17,458
- Oh, oh!
- Ohhhh!
221
00:10:34,830 --> 00:10:38,570
All right?
Pony tail is in there. Oh, God.
222
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:40,438
I'm next.
Oh, no, swap with me.
223
00:10:40,520 --> 00:10:43,080
No, thanks. Well, yes, thanks,
Grumio. You're my slave.
224
00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:45,240
I didn't sleep,
so please swap with me.
225
00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:47,960
Why didn't you sleep?
Because of you, mate.
226
00:10:48,120 --> 00:10:50,360
What do you mean?
I'm an ideal bedfellow.
227
00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:52,800
Are you?
Yeah.
228
00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:56,040
Do you know you napsterbate?
I do what now?
229
00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:58,080
You napsterbate. You sleep wank.
230
00:10:58,640 --> 00:11:01,520
Shut up!
No-one's ever mentioned it before.
231
00:11:01,560 --> 00:11:03,680
No-one's ever hung around
to find out.
232
00:11:04,560 --> 00:11:06,320
Did I get to the end?
233
00:11:06,360 --> 00:11:07,960
I didn't watch.
234
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,000
You did, yeah.
235
00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:12,200
Ha, morning!
All right.
236
00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:14,800
I have left anus cloth next to sink.
237
00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:16,840
Right, cool.
What's an anus cloth?
238
00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:19,280
Do you mean my face flannel?
239
00:11:19,640 --> 00:11:22,480
Have a nice day. I'd leave
that for a bit if I were you.
240
00:11:24,520 --> 00:11:26,520
OK, you can go first.
241
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:32,480
I had no idea there was a husband.
Well, I think you did.
242
00:11:32,560 --> 00:11:34,760
I think you lead us into
a honey trap. How dare you.
243
00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:37,560
I did no such thing.
You said Thracian women were dirty.
244
00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:40,040
They are very dirty, but
also very faithful.
245
00:11:40,680 --> 00:11:42,280
That's a terrible combination.
246
00:11:42,320 --> 00:11:44,520
Not for the Thracian blokes.
They bloody love it.
247
00:11:44,560 --> 00:11:46,200
We want the Thracians
out of our flat.
248
00:11:46,240 --> 00:11:48,640
They're noisy and they leave
their fruit everywhere.
249
00:11:48,680 --> 00:11:50,920
Ah, now you're being Thracist.
What? No, I'm not.
250
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,960
No, I'm not having Thracism
in my building.
251
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:55,320
Those guys have suffered.
They've been invaded.
252
00:11:55,560 --> 00:11:58,280
And now we've been invaded.
Exactly. Serves us right.
253
00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:01,640
The bottom line is, lads, you
wanted her, you keep her. And him.
254
00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:03,960
Yeah, but for how long?
You said this was temporary.
255
00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:06,120
Well, that depends
on their banana business.
256
00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:08,360
I mean, if it takes off then
so will they.
257
00:12:12,880 --> 00:12:14,600
Off you go, then.
258
00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:17,960
Ahem! Introducing bananae.
259
00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:25,640
The hip new yellow fruit snack
that gives you energy and friends.
260
00:12:25,680 --> 00:12:27,680
Ooh, does it?
Yeah.
261
00:12:27,760 --> 00:12:31,880
This hand-held superfood
262
00:12:31,920 --> 00:12:37,600
is this season's must eat
for all thrillseeking execs.
263
00:12:37,640 --> 00:12:39,560
Ask Stylax for them now.
264
00:12:39,600 --> 00:12:43,200
Ah. You realise I can't put
out an advertisement as a memo.
265
00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:45,080
It's not an advertisement.
266
00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:46,680
I'm afraid it is
267
00:12:46,720 --> 00:12:49,120
if you're telling people to
ask Stylax for them now.
268
00:12:49,160 --> 00:12:52,600
OK. What about if we put
a question mark at the end?
269
00:12:52,640 --> 00:12:56,840
So it was like, 'Ask Stylax
for them now?'
270
00:12:57,480 --> 00:12:59,960
Oh, yes, all right.
271
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:02,040
Would you not like to
mention their shape?
272
00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:04,080
Ah... no.
273
00:13:04,680 --> 00:13:06,680
No, you're all right.
274
00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:12,600
We meet at last.
275
00:13:13,320 --> 00:13:14,920
Shredder, do you mind?
What's that?
276
00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:17,080
I don't want you looking
at me when I'm eating it.
277
00:13:17,120 --> 00:13:19,720
Oh, right, shall I?
No, stay. Just turn around.
278
00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:29,120
You have to peel it.
I know, I know you have to peel it.
279
00:13:35,120 --> 00:13:38,560
They're high in energy
and, erm, yellow.
280
00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:40,600
Sssh!
281
00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:52,800
Do you like them?
Yes.
282
00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:55,600
Yes, I do.
283
00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:57,760
So, maybe if you order some more in.
284
00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:02,200
Oh, I will. This is exactly what
the workforce need to defeat the mid-afternoon slump.
285
00:14:02,240 --> 00:14:03,840
Oh, big time.
Shredder?
286
00:14:03,880 --> 00:14:05,880
What?
Can you get me a shed load more?
287
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:12,800
Don't take it personally.
288
00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:15,920
I don't. It's just dispiriting
that so many auditions are fixed.
289
00:14:15,960 --> 00:14:19,280
By fixed you mean someone
else gets the part? Yeah, exactly.
290
00:14:19,320 --> 00:14:21,000
Help our brave boys.
291
00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:23,040
Oh, Marcus, there he is.
Oh, shit.
292
00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:26,880
Him? What? That frail old man there?
He's deceptive sprightly.
293
00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:28,640
Can we just go please
before he sees us?
294
00:14:28,680 --> 00:14:31,880
He won't see us. He's probably
got cataracts if he's in his eighties.
295
00:14:31,920 --> 00:14:34,560
He's late sixties tops.
Help our boys, sweetheart?
296
00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:37,320
I think I've already
helped quite enough, thank you.
297
00:14:37,360 --> 00:14:39,560
Do you mind if I ask you
how old you are, please?
298
00:14:39,600 --> 00:14:41,600
I'm too old for you, darling.
I'm 79.
299
00:14:42,280 --> 00:14:44,920
He's basically 80.
Seventies. He's in his seventies.
300
00:14:44,960 --> 00:14:47,800
Help our brave boys abroad, sir?
Just get out my face, yeah.
301
00:14:47,840 --> 00:14:51,040
Oh, it's you. Oh, that's come up
nice and shiny, hasn't it?
302
00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:53,200
Yeah, just piss off, you knob.
303
00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:56,000
Oh, so you're a tough guy now,
are you?
304
00:14:56,160 --> 00:14:57,960
Ignore him, Marcus, just walk away.
305
00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,320
Yeah, that's right, Marcus.
Jog on, mate.
306
00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:09,360
You got something to say, have you?
You little pussy.
307
00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:11,920
Ohhh!
308
00:15:11,960 --> 00:15:13,600
What the hell
did you do that for?
309
00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:15,400
He's an old man,
you bloody psychopath.
310
00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:18,040
He called me a pussy and you
were teasing me the whole time.
311
00:15:18,080 --> 00:15:19,680
So it's OK to deck him?
312
00:15:19,720 --> 00:15:23,440
Oh, I'm pathetic for being beaten up
by an old man but I'm a monster for beating him up?
313
00:15:23,480 --> 00:15:26,880
What am I supposed to do?
Neither. You're meant to do neither.
314
00:15:28,200 --> 00:15:30,200
Ah, come on.
315
00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:37,200
Ah, man, that's even less cool.
I know. It went down really badly.
316
00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:40,040
Clearly the only thing worse
than being attacked by an old man
317
00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:41,840
is attacking an old man.
318
00:15:41,880 --> 00:15:44,560
Well, so what am I meant to do
if he really wants to fight me?
319
00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:46,280
You just wait it out.
Just wait it out?
320
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:49,120
What, until he dies? Yeah,
that's what you do. You outlive him.
321
00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:52,480
I'm not even sure I would, mate.
He was so fucking sprightly.
322
00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:56,560
Well, tonight why don't
we try sleeping top and tail?
323
00:15:56,760 --> 00:15:58,920
I'm not worried about your
top or your tail.
324
00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:00,960
It's that area there.
Oi!
325
00:16:01,960 --> 00:16:03,960
Hello.
Hiya.
326
00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:18,880
Is this our flat?
327
00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:20,520
Get off me.
328
00:16:20,560 --> 00:16:23,600
Grumio, why does our flat look
like a community centre?
329
00:16:23,640 --> 00:16:25,720
They invited some more
Thracians round.
330
00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:28,760
They were all right at first,
then it all got a bit much.
331
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:31,000
I'll say. It's bloody heaving.
332
00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:33,600
Stylax, come here.
333
00:16:33,640 --> 00:16:35,640
Come meet my sister Eva.
334
00:16:38,240 --> 00:16:40,000
This is my sister Eva.
335
00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:41,920
Hello.
Hiya. My name's Stylax.
336
00:16:41,960 --> 00:16:43,640
Yeah.
337
00:16:43,680 --> 00:16:45,680
And her husband Gregor.
338
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:48,800
Right, yeah.
339
00:16:50,040 --> 00:16:52,800
Sorry, Cosmo. Yeah?
What's this?
340
00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:54,480
We have get-together.
341
00:16:54,520 --> 00:16:56,520
Well, can I...
I've got some food I wanna cook.
342
00:16:56,560 --> 00:16:59,000
No, no. No space in kitchen.
But we have food.
343
00:16:59,160 --> 00:17:00,960
What have you got?
344
00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:04,840
Banana fritter, banana cakes, a
Thracian dish called galvinta, hmm.
345
00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:08,040
What's galvinta?
Secret recipe.
346
00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:10,200
Banana-based?
Yes.
347
00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:13,200
This my friend Carlotta.
348
00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:15,240
Hey.
Hi. I'm Stylax.
349
00:17:15,760 --> 00:17:17,320
Pleased to meet you.
350
00:17:17,360 --> 00:17:19,040
And her husband Angelos.
351
00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:21,080
Yep, thought so.
352
00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:25,600
Mushroom. Mushroom, over here.
353
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:27,520
What does that mean?
For wrestling.
354
00:17:27,560 --> 00:17:30,120
They keep trying to get me
to wrestle that slippery lad.
355
00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:32,160
Come on, Mushroom,
he's only boy.
356
00:17:32,240 --> 00:17:34,120
And calling me Mushroom.
357
00:17:34,160 --> 00:17:37,000
And this is my cousin Petra.
Her husband passed away recently.
358
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,080
OK, cool.
Stylax. Lovely to meet you.
359
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:41,480
So she cannot touch a man
for one year.
360
00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:42,920
Yep, obviously.
361
00:17:42,960 --> 00:17:44,960
Mushroom, Mushroom, Mushroom!
362
00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:47,680
- Oh, look.
- Mushroom! Mushroom!
363
00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:50,720
Look at the Mushroom.
Mushroom! Mushroom! Mushroom!
364
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:58,320
Mushroom! Mushroom! Mushroom!
365
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:21,240
You really should be able
to take a 10-year-old boy, Grumio.
366
00:18:21,280 --> 00:18:24,200
There's no way that beast were 10.
He were at least 12.
367
00:18:26,040 --> 00:18:27,800
I can't live like this.
368
00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:29,440
These people are awful.
369
00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:32,240
I'm not being Thracist. I just
really want them out of my flat.
370
00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:33,960
Yeah, they'll be gone soon.
371
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:37,280
A couple more big banana orders
from work and they're out of here. Two days.
372
00:18:37,320 --> 00:18:39,160
Don't say it. Don't say anything.
373
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:42,200
Don't speak to me ever again.
This is a new fucking low.
374
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,960
Oh, bloody hell. What's he doing?
375
00:18:50,560 --> 00:18:52,520
Mate, no! This isn't the toilet.
376
00:18:52,560 --> 00:18:54,560
Hello, Mushroom.
377
00:18:57,800 --> 00:18:59,800
Two days max.
378
00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:15,960
Water?
379
00:19:18,040 --> 00:19:19,880
Water?
380
00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:21,920
Oh, fuck!
381
00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:23,960
Aghh!
382
00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:27,000
The banana jacket
is an accident waiting to happen.
383
00:19:27,040 --> 00:19:28,600
Except it's already happened.
384
00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:31,040
Right. OK, it's an accident
waiting to happen again.
385
00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:33,320
Can you not just
look where you're going, water boy?
386
00:19:33,360 --> 00:19:35,240
Not if I'm carrying
the jug, no. Water man!
387
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:37,520
These things are a health
and safety nightmare.
388
00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:40,400
He just doesn't like them because
they're shaped like a penis.
389
00:19:40,440 --> 00:19:42,560
It is not that actually.
It isn't that actually.
390
00:19:42,600 --> 00:19:46,720
I insist you ban them or I will tell
head office you're putting the safety of the staff at risk.
391
00:19:46,760 --> 00:19:48,760
I will.
Fine, have it your way.
392
00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:51,960
No, wait.
As of now, I am banning bananae.
393
00:19:52,280 --> 00:19:55,200
They are bananned.
Do not bring them into the office.
394
00:19:55,640 --> 00:19:57,280
Now get out.
395
00:19:57,320 --> 00:19:59,320
Thank you for your time.
396
00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:02,280
But they're so tasty and hip.
397
00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:04,520
The deal is off, Shredder,
I'm banning them.
398
00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:06,880
Immediately after I've had
this last one.
399
00:20:13,120 --> 00:20:16,120
So that's that, then. We're
basically stuck with these fuckers.
400
00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:18,360
Looks like it. But you know,
it'll get better.
401
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:20,160
Oh, it won't.
Of course it will.
402
00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:22,680
After a time we'll adapt
to their ways and customs
403
00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:25,320
and maybe even meet
some single Thracian women
404
00:20:25,440 --> 00:20:27,240
who can be filthy and loyal to us.
405
00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:29,280
Make way!
406
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:31,600
Shit, get down.
407
00:20:31,640 --> 00:20:33,640
Down.
Halt!
408
00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:36,880
On me.
409
00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:49,280
Does Marcus Gallow live here?
410
00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:51,720
What do you want him for?
411
00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:54,800
The evil bastard attacked
a veteran, put him in hospital.
412
00:20:54,840 --> 00:20:56,840
Any idea where he is?
413
00:20:57,280 --> 00:20:59,280
Oh, yeah, he's right in here.
414
00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:02,120
He's that one with the pony tail.
415
00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:04,040
Thank you.
416
00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:06,080
Come on, boys.
417
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:12,000
These big oldies
all come barrelling in,
418
00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:15,080
then one of them, like, flung him
about by his pony tail.
419
00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:17,400
What was Irina doing?
420
00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:19,880
She was sort of squealing,
but not like before.
421
00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:23,000
This were less sexy, more angry.
422
00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:24,920
And then they just left?
423
00:21:24,960 --> 00:21:27,280
Just packed their bags
and buggered off. Awesome.
424
00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:30,200
Is it awesome, though, that
we had an innocent guy beaten up?
425
00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:32,240
Yeah. He was really annoying.
426
00:21:32,480 --> 00:21:34,920
I'm not sure that's enough.
Yeah, with all the kissing.
427
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,480
And the wrestling.
Did you see the size of his shits?
428
00:21:37,520 --> 00:21:39,160
They were bigger than me.
429
00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:41,040
I suppose it will be nice
to have my bed back
430
00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:43,520
without the herpes-ridden
teddy bear wanking in it.
431
00:21:43,560 --> 00:21:45,560
There you go.
This couldn't be any better.
432
00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:47,640
Oh, they didn't leave any bananae,
did they?
433
00:21:47,680 --> 00:21:50,880
No, sorry. But I did find
this under the bed.
434
00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:55,920
What the hell is that?
Haven't got a clue.
435
00:21:56,280 --> 00:21:58,280
It's worth a try, though, isn't it?
436
00:21:58,400 --> 00:22:00,400
Go for it.
437
00:22:04,920 --> 00:22:06,520
Yeah, it's not bad that.
438
00:22:06,619 --> 00:22:09,705
439
00:22:09,755 --> 00:22:14,305
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
34483
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Filipino
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Interlingua
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof
