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1
00:00:22,990 --> 00:00:24,947
Make sure
I'm in the frame.
2
00:00:24,947 --> 00:00:26,916
Make sure you get my head.
I want to see my hair.
3
00:00:26,916 --> 00:00:28,819
- All right, all right.- Janis, hurry up!
4
00:00:28,819 --> 00:00:30,293
It's not easy
making a movie.
5
00:00:30,293 --> 00:00:31,525
You better not
drop my phone.
6
00:00:32,330 --> 00:00:33,626
You got it?
7
00:00:33,626 --> 00:00:35,595
Yep. Yep. Yep.
Okay, here we go.
8
00:00:35,595 --> 00:00:37,333
Hey... Oh, Lord.
Shit.
9
00:00:37,333 --> 00:00:39,467
We're Cloverfielding.
Pick it up.
10
00:00:39,467 --> 00:00:41,634
- Give me a minute.
- Make sure I'm in the frame, girl.
11
00:00:41,634 --> 00:00:44,670
Give me a minute!
Am I in the frame?
12
00:00:44,670 --> 00:00:46,001
I'm in there?
Yes.
13
00:00:46,001 --> 00:00:47,343
Get me in the frame?
Yeah.
14
00:00:47,343 --> 00:00:48,542
You got my head in there?
Yeah.
15
00:00:48,542 --> 00:00:50,874
Boom, let's go.
16
00:00:50,874 --> 00:00:53,283
♪ It's a cautionary tale ♪
17
00:00:53,283 --> 00:00:55,219
♪ Of fear and lust and pride ♪
18
00:00:55,219 --> 00:00:59,487
♪ Based on actual events
Where people died ♪
19
00:00:59,487 --> 00:01:00,884
No one died.
20
00:01:00,884 --> 00:01:02,094
♪ But how far
Would you go ♪
21
00:01:02,094 --> 00:01:04,624
♪ To be popular and hot? ♪
22
00:01:04,624 --> 00:01:07,264
♪ Would you resist temptation? ♪
23
00:01:07,264 --> 00:01:08,727
♪ No, you would not! ♪
24
00:01:08,727 --> 00:01:10,696
♪ Just admit it sometimes ♪
25
00:01:10,696 --> 00:01:15,668
♪ Mean is what you are
Mean is easier than nice ♪
26
00:01:15,668 --> 00:01:18,671
♪ And though mean
Can take you far ♪
27
00:01:18,671 --> 00:01:22,004
♪ Maybe this will
Make you think twice ♪
28
00:01:22,004 --> 00:01:24,006
Spin. Clicker. Fosse!
29
00:01:24,006 --> 00:01:27,482
♪ This is a cautionary tale ♪
30
00:01:28,650 --> 00:01:31,013
♪ About corruption
And betrayal ♪
31
00:01:31,013 --> 00:01:33,521
♪ And getting hit by a bus! ♪
32
00:01:33,521 --> 00:01:36,722
♪ You can't buy integrity ♪
33
00:01:36,722 --> 00:01:41,760
♪ At the mall
It's not for sale ♪
34
00:01:41,760 --> 00:01:42,926
Truth.
35
00:01:42,926 --> 00:01:46,633
♪ This is a cautionary ♪
36
00:01:46,633 --> 00:01:52,804
♪ Tale! ♪
37
00:02:10,021 --> 00:02:11,691
♪ I used
To think I would spend ♪
38
00:02:11,691 --> 00:02:14,430
♪ Every second I have ♪
39
00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:17,829
♪ Right where my story began ♪
40
00:02:20,097 --> 00:02:21,800
♪ I'd be happy here ♪
41
00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:24,638
♪ Every day, month
Year of my life ♪
42
00:02:24,638 --> 00:02:28,741
♪ But now I'm wishing
For whatever comes
After goodbye ♪
43
00:02:29,744 --> 00:02:32,514
♪ On every star in the sky ♪
44
00:02:34,683 --> 00:02:39,015
♪ And I'm dreaming of
What I could become ♪
45
00:02:39,015 --> 00:02:42,293
♪ This is where home will be ♪
46
00:02:42,293 --> 00:02:45,890
♪ As long as my lungs
Can breathe ♪
47
00:02:45,890 --> 00:02:49,663
♪ But my heart is dyin'
To leave ♪
48
00:02:49,663 --> 00:02:52,369
♪ 'Cause I know there's more
To me ♪
49
00:02:52,369 --> 00:02:54,668
♪ I don't want to live with
What ifs... ♪
50
00:02:54,668 --> 00:02:56,131
Cady?
51
00:02:56,131 --> 00:02:58,067
I've been thinking
about what you said.
52
00:02:58,067 --> 00:03:00,938
About being frustrated
by my decision
53
00:03:00,938 --> 00:03:02,577
and feeling
a little stuck here,
54
00:03:02,577 --> 00:03:03,809
just me and you.
55
00:03:03,809 --> 00:03:05,173
I'm sorry I yelled.
56
00:03:05,173 --> 00:03:07,417
But you have a point.
57
00:03:07,417 --> 00:03:08,781
Maybe I've been
a little selfish,
58
00:03:08,781 --> 00:03:10,387
putting my research ahead
59
00:03:10,387 --> 00:03:12,422
of your social
and emotional development.
60
00:03:12,422 --> 00:03:14,457
I called the people
from Northwestern back.
61
00:03:14,457 --> 00:03:15,689
I took the job.
62
00:03:16,560 --> 00:03:17,889
What?
63
00:03:17,889 --> 00:03:19,792
But they need me
to start on September 9th.
64
00:03:19,792 --> 00:03:23,367
♪ I don't want to live
With what ifs, might haves ♪
65
00:03:23,367 --> 00:03:27,030
♪ Could have been if I had ♪
Cady?
66
00:03:27,030 --> 00:03:31,540
♪ Only tried, not held back
Oh, no ♪
67
00:03:31,540 --> 00:03:33,674
♪ That's not a part of my plan ♪
68
00:03:33,674 --> 00:03:37,007
♪ That's not the me that I
That's not the me that I am ♪
69
00:03:37,007 --> 00:03:39,515
♪ This time
There's no lookin' back ♪
70
00:03:40,848 --> 00:03:44,520
♪ I'm crossing things
Off my list ♪
71
00:03:44,520 --> 00:03:48,260
♪ Don't want to run out of time
Before I wake up and find ♪
72
00:03:48,260 --> 00:03:50,592
♪ There was a life
That I missed ♪
73
00:03:51,760 --> 00:03:54,431
♪ My limit doesn't exist ♪
74
00:04:04,542 --> 00:04:06,168
I'll pick you up at 3:00.
75
00:04:12,209 --> 00:04:16,178
♪ I don't want to live
With what ifs, might haves ♪
76
00:04:16,178 --> 00:04:19,918
♪ Could have been if I had ♪
77
00:04:19,918 --> 00:04:24,186
♪ Only tried, not held back
Oh, no ♪
78
00:04:24,186 --> 00:04:27,398
♪ That's not a part of my plan
That's not the me that I am ♪
79
00:04:27,398 --> 00:04:30,599
♪ No what ifs, regrets ♪
80
00:04:30,599 --> 00:04:34,262
♪ Wear my strengths
And weakness ♪
81
00:04:34,262 --> 00:04:38,739
♪ I won't hide my feelings
Oh, no ♪
82
00:04:38,739 --> 00:04:41,709
♪ That's not a part of my plan
That's not the... ♪
83
00:04:41,709 --> 00:04:43,579
Bitch, move.
84
00:04:53,085 --> 00:04:54,623
Hope you all
had a good summer.
85
00:04:54,623 --> 00:04:56,086
Mine was pretty good.
86
00:04:56,086 --> 00:04:58,561
I worked
in my brother-in-law's
87
00:04:58,561 --> 00:05:00,365
golf pro shop.
88
00:05:00,365 --> 00:05:03,258
Did not make a lot of money,
so of course I am back
89
00:05:03,258 --> 00:05:06,129
to help shepherd you all
into the future.
90
00:05:11,840 --> 00:05:13,675
May I have everyone's
attention, please?
91
00:05:13,675 --> 00:05:16,205
Eyes to the front of the room.
92
00:05:16,205 --> 00:05:19,307
You may notice
we have a new student
joining us today.
93
00:05:19,307 --> 00:05:20,847
She just moved here
from Kentucky.
94
00:05:20,847 --> 00:05:24,422
Kenya. Her name is Caddy.
95
00:05:24,422 --> 00:05:26,314
It's Cady. Cady Heron.
96
00:05:26,314 --> 00:05:28,888
My apologies.
I will commit that to memory.
97
00:05:28,888 --> 00:05:32,793
Cady, like the Canadian
songstress k.d. lang,
98
00:05:32,793 --> 00:05:36,126
and Heron,
like the illegal street drug.
99
00:05:37,096 --> 00:05:39,063
Thank you, Caddy.
It's Cady.
100
00:05:39,063 --> 00:05:41,802
Cady, hi. I'm Ms. Norbury.
I'll be your homeroom teacher.
101
00:05:41,802 --> 00:05:43,232
This is your roster.
102
00:05:43,232 --> 00:05:45,003
I see I also have you
for A.P. Calculus.
103
00:05:45,003 --> 00:05:47,203
You must have had excellent
teachers at your old school.
104
00:05:47,203 --> 00:05:49,007
Oh, I was homeschooled.
Homeschooled?
105
00:05:49,007 --> 00:05:51,779
Oh, that's a fun way
to take jobs from my union.
106
00:05:51,779 --> 00:05:53,308
No, I'm joking. It's fine.
Ah.
107
00:05:53,308 --> 00:05:55,277
Um, do you think you can
follow this schedule?
108
00:05:55,277 --> 00:05:57,015
Yeah, I think so.
Okay, you're gonna be moving
109
00:05:57,015 --> 00:05:58,687
from class to class
with each...
110
00:06:00,348 --> 00:06:01,217
That's it.
111
00:06:02,154 --> 00:06:03,527
Everybody find a seat.
112
00:06:04,189 --> 00:06:05,056
Please.
113
00:06:08,996 --> 00:06:10,963
This is first period:
114
00:06:10,963 --> 00:06:12,701
American Literature.
115
00:06:12,701 --> 00:06:14,472
♪ My name is Mister Rapp ♪
116
00:06:14,472 --> 00:06:16,606
♪ And I take no...? ♪
117
00:06:18,676 --> 00:06:21,171
♪ My name is Mister Rapp
And I take no...? ♪
118
00:06:21,910 --> 00:06:23,338
"...care of myself"?
119
00:06:23,338 --> 00:06:27,947
"Crap."
Correct answer was "crap."
120
00:06:29,247 --> 00:06:30,653
Find a seat.
121
00:06:30,653 --> 00:06:32,380
I don't want you
to think of me
122
00:06:32,380 --> 00:06:33,986
as just any other teacher.
123
00:06:33,986 --> 00:06:35,526
I prefer to think of myself
124
00:06:35,526 --> 00:06:37,528
as a time traveler.
125
00:06:37,528 --> 00:06:41,059
Maintenant nous choisissons
nos noms français.
126
00:06:41,897 --> 00:06:43,633
Cady. Comment tu t'appelles?
127
00:06:43,633 --> 00:06:45,833
Je m'appelle Cady.
Incorrecte!
128
00:06:45,833 --> 00:06:48,363
You have to pick
a French name.
129
00:06:48,363 --> 00:06:49,738
All the French people I know
130
00:06:49,738 --> 00:06:52,004
just call me Cady.
131
00:06:52,004 --> 00:06:53,676
Just say Marie.
132
00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:56,481
Um... Marie?
133
00:06:56,481 --> 00:06:58,175
Marie.
134
00:06:58,175 --> 00:07:00,683
J'anice.
J'anice.
135
00:07:00,683 --> 00:07:03,312
Chanel.
Non.
136
00:07:03,312 --> 00:07:04,852
Fantine.
Non.
137
00:07:04,852 --> 00:07:06,150
Celine Dion?
138
00:07:06,150 --> 00:07:07,151
Non.
139
00:07:07,758 --> 00:07:09,120
Beyoncé.
140
00:07:09,120 --> 00:07:11,056
Quais. Mais non.
141
00:07:12,992 --> 00:07:15,764
Welcome to "Health
and Human Sexuality."
142
00:07:15,764 --> 00:07:18,195
Now, this fall
we'll be getting
143
00:07:18,195 --> 00:07:21,539
into the state-mandated unit
on Abstinence.
144
00:07:21,539 --> 00:07:23,167
Of course then followed by,
in the spring,
145
00:07:23,167 --> 00:07:25,202
Condoms and Choking.
146
00:07:25,202 --> 00:07:27,776
Where do you think
you're going there, hotshot?
147
00:07:27,776 --> 00:07:29,514
I need to urinate.
148
00:07:29,514 --> 00:07:30,779
No way, José.
149
00:07:30,779 --> 00:07:32,374
Uh, it's Cady.
150
00:07:32,374 --> 00:07:33,782
Well, Cady,
151
00:07:33,782 --> 00:07:35,883
first thing you need to do
is ask permission.
152
00:07:35,883 --> 00:07:37,445
But the second thing
you'll need
153
00:07:37,445 --> 00:07:39,623
is this lavatory pass
154
00:07:39,623 --> 00:07:41,625
that is shaped
like a sperm whale.
155
00:07:41,625 --> 00:07:42,725
Get it?
156
00:07:43,288 --> 00:07:44,694
Um...
157
00:07:44,694 --> 00:07:46,762
May I please have
the lavatory pass?
158
00:07:46,762 --> 00:07:49,061
No, you may not.
You may go sit back down.
159
00:07:49,061 --> 00:07:51,866
You can go at lunch.
Nice try, kiddo.
160
00:07:51,866 --> 00:07:53,395
All right,
let's jump into this!
161
00:07:53,395 --> 00:07:55,606
This won't be awkward at all,
I swear to God.
162
00:08:41,720 --> 00:08:43,346
This one.
163
00:08:45,922 --> 00:08:48,285
Are you okay in there?
164
00:08:48,285 --> 00:08:49,924
Uh, yes.
165
00:08:49,924 --> 00:08:51,519
'Cause you've been in there
a very long time.
166
00:08:51,519 --> 00:08:52,960
We're concerned
you're either doing drugs
167
00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:54,192
or having a toilet baby.
168
00:08:56,999 --> 00:08:58,669
Hi. I'm Janis.
169
00:08:58,669 --> 00:09:00,330
And je m'appelle Sasha Fierce.
170
00:09:00,330 --> 00:09:01,573
This is Damian.
171
00:09:01,573 --> 00:09:03,036
He is almost too gay
to function.
172
00:09:03,036 --> 00:09:05,335
But I push through.
I manage.
173
00:09:05,335 --> 00:09:06,809
Hi.
174
00:09:06,809 --> 00:09:07,942
We've been
watching you all day.
175
00:09:07,942 --> 00:09:09,438
You're a mess.
176
00:09:09,438 --> 00:09:13,684
So we volunteer to amplify
your lunch experience.
177
00:09:13,684 --> 00:09:16,687
Yeah, what Damian is saying is
we will help you, Caddy.
178
00:09:16,687 --> 00:09:20,757
Thanks so much.
Um... it's Cady.
179
00:09:20,757 --> 00:09:22,726
Yeah.
I'm gonna call you Caddy.
180
00:09:23,586 --> 00:09:24,827
Get out of the toilet!
181
00:09:24,827 --> 00:09:26,554
Mkay.
182
00:09:26,554 --> 00:09:29,491
You just need to find
your clique and commit to it.
183
00:09:29,491 --> 00:09:31,031
You have your Jocks.
184
00:09:32,835 --> 00:09:35,431
Your Corny Horny Band Freaks.
185
00:09:38,909 --> 00:09:40,238
Your Classic Burnouts.
186
00:09:42,075 --> 00:09:43,373
Do any of these feel
like your people?
187
00:09:43,373 --> 00:09:45,342
I don't think so.
Hmm...
188
00:09:45,342 --> 00:09:47,344
You know what might
be cute for her?
189
00:09:47,344 --> 00:09:48,719
What, Grade Grubbers?
190
00:09:48,719 --> 00:09:50,589
No, I was gonna say
Theater Mess.
191
00:09:56,586 --> 00:09:58,487
And who's at that table?
192
00:09:58,487 --> 00:10:00,896
Oh, no, no, no.
193
00:10:00,896 --> 00:10:02,491
We call them the Plastics
194
00:10:02,491 --> 00:10:04,229
'cause they're shiny,
fake and hard.
195
00:10:04,229 --> 00:10:05,835
Yeah, that's Gretchen Wieners.
196
00:10:05,835 --> 00:10:08,101
She knows everything
about everybody.
197
00:10:08,101 --> 00:10:09,806
That's why
her hair's so big.
198
00:10:09,806 --> 00:10:11,533
It's full of secrets.
199
00:10:11,533 --> 00:10:13,073
And that's Karen Shetty.
200
00:10:13,073 --> 00:10:14,811
She's the dumbest person
you'll ever meet.
201
00:10:14,811 --> 00:10:18,177
I once saw her put a D
in the word "orange."
202
00:10:20,885 --> 00:10:23,050
Could I just sit
with you guys?
203
00:10:23,855 --> 00:10:25,382
I actually don't know.
204
00:10:25,382 --> 00:10:26,757
We've never been asked
that question before.
205
00:10:26,757 --> 00:10:27,956
Could she?
206
00:10:27,956 --> 00:10:30,255
We are very exclusive,
207
00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:33,731
but I think we can make
an exception.
208
00:10:35,931 --> 00:10:38,131
What was that?
Oh, Lord, it's the Queen Bee.
Don't look her in the eye!
209
00:10:51,311 --> 00:10:56,083
♪ My name is Regina George ♪
210
00:10:57,152 --> 00:11:02,122
♪ And I am a massive deal ♪
211
00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:05,620
♪ Fear me, love me ♪
212
00:11:05,620 --> 00:11:09,327
♪ Stand and stare at me ♪
213
00:11:09,327 --> 00:11:11,626
♪ And these? ♪
214
00:11:11,626 --> 00:11:13,628
♪ These are real ♪
215
00:11:13,628 --> 00:11:17,137
♪ I've got money and looks ♪
216
00:11:18,844 --> 00:11:23,308
♪ I am, like, drunk with power ♪
217
00:11:23,308 --> 00:11:28,918
♪ This whole school
Humps my leg ♪
218
00:11:28,918 --> 00:11:32,515
♪ Like a Chihuahua ♪
219
00:11:32,515 --> 00:11:37,828
♪ I'm the prettiest poison
You've ever seen ♪
220
00:11:37,828 --> 00:11:42,998
♪ That filter you use
Looks just like me ♪
221
00:11:42,998 --> 00:11:47,871
♪ My name is Regina George ♪
222
00:11:47,871 --> 00:11:52,810
♪ And I am a massive deal ♪
223
00:11:52,810 --> 00:11:57,639
♪ I don't care who you are ♪
224
00:11:57,639 --> 00:12:00,213
♪ I don't care ♪
225
00:12:00,213 --> 00:12:07,220
♪ How you feel ♪
226
00:12:07,220 --> 00:12:08,518
You.
227
00:12:08,518 --> 00:12:10,091
Yeah, you. Come here.
228
00:12:19,234 --> 00:12:20,596
Why don't I know you?
229
00:12:20,596 --> 00:12:23,533
I'm new. I just moved here
from Kenya.
230
00:12:23,533 --> 00:12:24,941
Shut up.
231
00:12:25,603 --> 00:12:26,811
Shut up!
232
00:12:26,811 --> 00:12:28,571
I didn't say anything.
233
00:12:28,571 --> 00:12:29,946
You're, like, really pretty.
234
00:12:31,345 --> 00:12:33,411
Thanks.
So you agree?
235
00:12:33,411 --> 00:12:34,643
You think
you're really pretty?
236
00:12:35,987 --> 00:12:37,580
Oh, I don't know.
237
00:12:37,580 --> 00:12:40,715
You're an international
student. That is so fetch.
238
00:12:40,715 --> 00:12:42,024
What is "fetch"?
239
00:12:42,024 --> 00:12:44,928
It's like slang
from an old movie.
240
00:12:44,928 --> 00:12:48,096
Juno, I think.
241
00:12:48,096 --> 00:12:49,559
Have you ever touched a tiger?
242
00:12:49,559 --> 00:12:52,100
Uh, no, those aren't
indigenous to Kenya.
243
00:12:52,100 --> 00:12:54,630
'Cause that's one
of my life goals.
244
00:12:54,630 --> 00:12:57,171
To not touch a tiger.
245
00:12:57,171 --> 00:12:59,272
Hey, new girl!
You want to see a trick?
246
00:12:59,272 --> 00:13:00,878
I can guess
any girl's bra size.
247
00:13:00,878 --> 00:13:02,770
All you got to do
is jump one time.
248
00:13:02,770 --> 00:13:04,948
Ew, Jason!
Do me.
249
00:13:04,948 --> 00:13:06,543
Oh, my God, Jason.
250
00:13:06,543 --> 00:13:09,579
You do not come to a party
at my house with Gretchen
251
00:13:09,579 --> 00:13:11,416
and then skeeze on the new girl
right in front of me.
252
00:13:11,416 --> 00:13:13,451
Do you want to have sex
with him?
253
00:13:13,451 --> 00:13:15,750
Oh, uh... no, thank you.
254
00:13:15,750 --> 00:13:17,059
Okay, then it's settled.
255
00:13:17,059 --> 00:13:18,390
Jason, no one thinks
you're funny.
256
00:13:18,390 --> 00:13:19,721
Okay? And this thing
you're doing
257
00:13:19,721 --> 00:13:21,063
where you lower your voice
when you talk
258
00:13:21,063 --> 00:13:22,460
is making people really sad.
259
00:13:22,460 --> 00:13:24,462
Excuse me, anyone
who would like Jason Weems
260
00:13:24,462 --> 00:13:26,464
to go back
to his normal speaking voice,
261
00:13:26,464 --> 00:13:27,432
please raise your hand.
262
00:13:31,801 --> 00:13:32,976
Yeah.
263
00:13:33,605 --> 00:13:34,945
Bitch.
264
00:13:34,945 --> 00:13:36,540
Wow.
265
00:13:36,540 --> 00:13:38,476
You're really gonna
get noticed around here.
266
00:13:39,314 --> 00:13:40,511
We should help you.
267
00:13:42,449 --> 00:13:44,251
Can you give us some privacy
for a sec?
268
00:13:44,251 --> 00:13:46,319
Oh. Yeah, sure.
269
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:52,127
I have your lunch!
270
00:13:53,361 --> 00:13:55,394
All right.
271
00:13:55,394 --> 00:13:57,495
So, we never really
do this, but...
272
00:13:57,495 --> 00:13:58,969
...you're invited
to eat lunch with us
273
00:13:58,969 --> 00:14:01,202
for the rest of the week.
Oh. Um...
274
00:14:01,202 --> 00:14:03,501
That's okay.
On Wednesdays,
we wear pink.
275
00:14:06,638 --> 00:14:08,572
They want me to have lunch
with them all week.
276
00:14:08,572 --> 00:14:10,343
That is tits!
277
00:14:10,343 --> 00:14:11,982
She means "that's great."
278
00:14:11,982 --> 00:14:14,017
I don't really get why
you guys hate them so much.
279
00:14:14,017 --> 00:14:16,118
Regina seems kind of cool.
No, no...
280
00:14:16,118 --> 00:14:17,812
Regina George is not cool.
281
00:14:17,812 --> 00:14:19,682
She's a scum-sucking
life ruiner.
282
00:14:19,682 --> 00:14:22,322
Janis hates Regina
because when we were
in sixth grade,
283
00:14:22,322 --> 00:14:24,489
she told everybody
that she was--
Hey, Damian!
284
00:14:24,489 --> 00:14:25,556
What?
285
00:14:25,556 --> 00:14:26,722
Shall we not?
286
00:14:26,722 --> 00:14:28,163
I am providing context.
287
00:14:28,163 --> 00:14:29,329
Caddy?
288
00:14:29,329 --> 00:14:31,133
You should have lunch
with them
289
00:14:31,133 --> 00:14:33,036
and then report back
and tell us
290
00:14:33,036 --> 00:14:35,203
every stupid, moronic thing
they said.
291
00:14:35,203 --> 00:14:37,634
Spy on them? That's bad.
292
00:14:37,634 --> 00:14:39,075
No! Look at us.
293
00:14:40,375 --> 00:14:42,980
Would we ever ask you
to do something bad?
294
00:14:42,980 --> 00:14:44,608
Uh...
295
00:14:47,250 --> 00:14:48,953
Okay.
Yes!
296
00:14:48,953 --> 00:14:50,988
Do you have a pink shirt
I can borrow?
297
00:14:50,988 --> 00:14:53,155
No!
Yes! What shade?
298
00:14:53,155 --> 00:14:55,487
Welcome to A.P. Calculus.
299
00:14:55,487 --> 00:15:00,723
Congratulations.
You know more math
than 85% of Americans.
300
00:15:00,723 --> 00:15:03,825
But you will not rest
on your laurels this year.
301
00:15:03,825 --> 00:15:06,234
I plan to push you.
302
00:15:06,234 --> 00:15:07,631
So let's get started.
303
00:15:07,631 --> 00:15:10,766
Chapter One, "Limits
and Their Properties."
304
00:15:10,766 --> 00:15:12,306
What the heck are limits,
you say?
305
00:15:12,306 --> 00:15:13,835
If I write out the equation,
306
00:15:13,835 --> 00:15:16,871
"The limit as x approaches two
of ,"
307
00:15:16,871 --> 00:15:18,741
the function is what
we're taking the limit of.
308
00:15:18,741 --> 00:15:20,611
I don't expect you to know
how to do this yet.
309
00:15:20,611 --> 00:15:21,876
The limit equals three.
310
00:15:22,516 --> 00:15:24,054
That's right.
311
00:15:24,054 --> 00:15:25,517
Let's try another one.
312
00:15:25,517 --> 00:15:27,354
Find the value of k
313
00:15:27,354 --> 00:15:29,554
for which the following
limit exists.
314
00:15:29,554 --> 00:15:31,853
K equals negative three.
Damn, girl!
315
00:15:33,626 --> 00:15:34,889
Wow.
316
00:15:36,134 --> 00:15:38,728
Are you trying to make
the rest of us feel dumb?
317
00:15:38,728 --> 00:15:41,929
No, I... I'm not trying to.
It's just, uh, happening.
318
00:15:41,929 --> 00:15:45,801
Oh, okay, it's like that.
All right, um, well...
319
00:15:46,870 --> 00:15:48,243
challenge accepted.
320
00:15:55,877 --> 00:15:57,945
♪ When I was nine ♪
321
00:15:57,945 --> 00:15:59,551
♪ I fell in love ♪
322
00:15:59,551 --> 00:16:01,289
♪ This Peace Corps guy ♪
323
00:16:02,820 --> 00:16:05,755
♪ I waited hours
Inside his tent with flowers ♪
324
00:16:05,755 --> 00:16:08,296
♪ Which made him laugh
Which made me cry ♪
325
00:16:08,296 --> 00:16:09,957
♪ By 13 I gave up trying ♪
326
00:16:09,957 --> 00:16:13,103
♪ I decided I would be
A mathematician ♪
327
00:16:13,103 --> 00:16:14,731
♪ 'Cause math is real ♪
328
00:16:14,731 --> 00:16:16,667
♪ I memorized a lot of pi ♪
329
00:16:16,667 --> 00:16:19,307
♪ Because addition
And subtraction and division ♪
330
00:16:19,307 --> 00:16:22,805
♪ Would never make me feel
So stupid with love ♪
331
00:16:22,805 --> 00:16:24,246
♪ I didn't get it ♪
332
00:16:24,246 --> 00:16:27,348
♪ I didn't get it, somehow ♪
333
00:16:27,348 --> 00:16:30,450
♪ Smart with math
But stupid with love ♪
334
00:16:30,450 --> 00:16:34,421
♪ I didn't get it
I didn't get it till now ♪
335
00:16:35,754 --> 00:16:38,425
♪ Mm, mm, mm ♪
336
00:16:39,989 --> 00:16:42,660
♪ So thank you, math
For being there ♪
337
00:16:42,660 --> 00:16:44,794
♪ To bring me joy ♪
338
00:16:46,072 --> 00:16:47,962
♪ And thank you, math ♪
339
00:16:47,962 --> 00:16:51,141
♪ 'Cause now you've brought me
This cute boy ♪
340
00:16:51,141 --> 00:16:53,440
♪ He's like someone from TV ♪
341
00:16:53,440 --> 00:16:56,509
♪ He's like that guy
Who gives out roses
To those women ♪
342
00:16:56,509 --> 00:16:58,280
♪ His clothes, his grooming ♪
343
00:16:58,280 --> 00:17:00,381
♪ And he's a foot away from me ♪
344
00:17:00,381 --> 00:17:02,779
♪ With swoopy hair
And shiny eyes
That I could swim in ♪
345
00:17:02,779 --> 00:17:04,319
♪ He's live and in the room! ♪
346
00:17:10,921 --> 00:17:14,527
♪ And I'm stupid with love
I want to get it ♪
347
00:17:14,527 --> 00:17:17,695
♪ I want to get it, but how? ♪
348
00:17:17,695 --> 00:17:20,995
♪ Smart with math
But stupid with love ♪
349
00:17:20,995 --> 00:17:25,274
♪ I want to get it
I didn't get it till now ♪
350
00:17:33,944 --> 00:17:37,088
♪ I'm astounded and nonplussed ♪
351
00:17:37,088 --> 00:17:40,047
♪ I am filled with calcu-lust ♪
352
00:17:40,047 --> 00:17:43,259
♪ Does this guy work out?
He must ♪
353
00:17:43,259 --> 00:17:46,361
♪ All sweaty at the gym ♪
354
00:17:46,361 --> 00:17:49,463
♪ Could that image
Be more hot? ♪
355
00:17:49,463 --> 00:17:52,466
♪ Let me just enjoy
That thought ♪
356
00:17:52,466 --> 00:17:55,436
♪ School was rough
But now it's not ♪
357
00:17:55,436 --> 00:17:57,735
♪ 'Cause now there's him ♪
358
00:17:57,735 --> 00:18:01,211
♪ Stupid with love
I didn't get it ♪
359
00:18:01,211 --> 00:18:04,346
♪ I didn't get it, somehow ♪
360
00:18:04,346 --> 00:18:07,415
♪ Smart with math
But stupid with love ♪
361
00:18:07,415 --> 00:18:10,814
♪ I didn't get it
I didn't get it till now ♪
362
00:18:17,427 --> 00:18:18,393
I'm okay.
363
00:18:24,566 --> 00:18:27,270
Mom, you can't
pick me up like this.
364
00:18:27,270 --> 00:18:28,535
It's embarrassing.
365
00:18:31,441 --> 00:18:33,210
You can't wear a tank top
two days in a row
366
00:18:33,210 --> 00:18:36,411
and you can
only wear your hair
in a ponytail once a week.
367
00:18:36,411 --> 00:18:38,039
So I guess
you've chosen today.
368
00:18:38,039 --> 00:18:42,043
Oh! And we only wear sweats
or track pants on Fridays.
369
00:18:42,043 --> 00:18:43,880
If you break any
of these rules,
370
00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:45,156
you can't sit with us.
371
00:18:45,156 --> 00:18:47,048
I mean, not just you,
like, any of us.
372
00:18:47,048 --> 00:18:48,720
Like if I wore sweatpants today,
373
00:18:48,720 --> 00:18:50,117
I'd have to
go sit over there...
374
00:18:50,117 --> 00:18:51,789
...with the Art Freaks.
375
00:18:54,530 --> 00:18:56,057
That seems fair.
376
00:18:56,057 --> 00:18:58,598
120 calories
and 48 calories from fat.
377
00:18:58,598 --> 00:18:59,665
What percent is that?
378
00:18:59,665 --> 00:19:02,129
Um, 48 into 120?
379
00:19:02,129 --> 00:19:03,867
There's no way of knowing.
380
00:19:04,771 --> 00:19:06,441
It's 40%.
381
00:19:06,441 --> 00:19:07,970
42 over 120
382
00:19:07,970 --> 00:19:10,104
equals x over 100,
and then you cross-multiply
383
00:19:10,104 --> 00:19:11,644
to get the value of x.
384
00:19:12,317 --> 00:19:14,185
Hmm.
385
00:19:14,185 --> 00:19:15,945
Whatever.
Um, I'm getting cheese fries.
386
00:19:22,149 --> 00:19:24,954
So, have you seen any guys
you think are cute yet?
387
00:19:26,595 --> 00:19:30,762
Oh, um, well, actually,
there's this one guy
in my Calculus class.
388
00:19:30,762 --> 00:19:34,799
Ooh, a senior! Who is it?
Uh, Aaron Samuels.
389
00:19:34,799 --> 00:19:37,967
You can't like Aaron Samuels!
That is Regina's ex-boyfriend!
No. No. Bad. Bad. Danger.
390
00:19:39,410 --> 00:19:42,169
Wait. I thought she
dumped him for Shane Oman.
391
00:19:42,169 --> 00:19:43,544
Irregardless!
392
00:19:43,544 --> 00:19:45,007
Ex-boyfriends are
off-limits for friends.
393
00:19:45,007 --> 00:19:46,679
That's just, like,
the rules of feminism!
394
00:19:50,949 --> 00:19:52,179
Don't worry.
395
00:19:52,179 --> 00:19:54,654
I will never tell Regina
what you said.
396
00:19:54,654 --> 00:19:56,524
I am very trustworthy.
397
00:19:56,524 --> 00:19:58,955
Karen's had sex with 11 people
and I've never told anyone.
398
00:20:00,563 --> 00:20:01,760
Yo, Golf Bird.
399
00:20:01,760 --> 00:20:03,993
Those fractions were tight.
What?
400
00:20:03,993 --> 00:20:07,304
"Caddy Heron." "Golf Bird."
401
00:20:07,304 --> 00:20:08,998
I don't like it.
I don't get it.
402
00:20:08,998 --> 00:20:12,001
I'm Kevin Ganatra.
I'm from your Calc class.
403
00:20:13,169 --> 00:20:14,971
I sit diagonally from you.
404
00:20:14,971 --> 00:20:17,171
I'm also captain
of the North Shore Mathletes.
405
00:20:17,171 --> 00:20:21,109
We're a very chill, dope,
extracurricular option.
406
00:20:21,109 --> 00:20:22,682
You know,
serve your college rezzy
407
00:20:22,682 --> 00:20:24,816
and your thirst for knolly.
Don't say "knolly."
408
00:20:24,816 --> 00:20:26,983
Also Ms. Norbury says
we get twice as much funding
409
00:20:26,983 --> 00:20:29,216
if we had a girl on the team,
so think about joining,
410
00:20:29,216 --> 00:20:30,987
because we'd love
to get jackets.
411
00:20:30,987 --> 00:20:32,890
Okay, yeah, sure.
Where do I...
412
00:20:32,890 --> 00:20:34,122
No, no,
you cannot join Mathletes.
413
00:20:34,122 --> 00:20:35,398
That is, like,
socially ruinous!
414
00:20:35,398 --> 00:20:38,335
Ew, no.
Why is he by our table?
415
00:20:38,335 --> 00:20:39,831
I can hear you, by the way.
416
00:20:39,831 --> 00:20:41,404
Can you hear me now?
417
00:20:41,404 --> 00:20:43,868
Bye.
418
00:20:43,868 --> 00:20:47,102
Uh, anyways,
uh, just take my card
in case you change your mind?
419
00:20:53,748 --> 00:20:56,452
God, you are so lucky
you have us to guide you.
420
00:20:56,452 --> 00:20:58,685
What are you doing
after school today?
421
00:20:58,685 --> 00:21:00,423
I want to give you some shoes.
422
00:21:03,054 --> 00:21:04,724
What kind of shoes?
423
00:21:04,724 --> 00:21:07,430
I have no idea. I guess, um,
something fancier than these?
424
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:09,960
She's so rude!
425
00:21:09,960 --> 00:21:12,600
I mean, maybe
she's just being generous.
426
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:14,800
Maybe we can have
a commensal relationship.
427
00:21:14,800 --> 00:21:17,165
What is that? I want one.
428
00:21:17,165 --> 00:21:20,905
So, in nature,
okay, so lions,
429
00:21:20,905 --> 00:21:22,775
they're the apex predators, right?
430
00:21:22,775 --> 00:21:23,941
They're the top
of the food chain.
431
00:21:23,941 --> 00:21:26,350
They can kill anything
they want.
432
00:21:26,350 --> 00:21:28,550
But if you're a hyena, well,
433
00:21:28,550 --> 00:21:31,619
then you follow them around
and you eat the carcasses
that they leave behind.
434
00:21:31,619 --> 00:21:33,280
Whoa.
Gretchen Wieners is a hyena.
435
00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:34,391
Got it.
436
00:21:34,391 --> 00:21:36,393
No, I did not say that.
437
00:21:36,393 --> 00:21:38,626
I'm just saying, if you're
on Regina's good side...
438
00:21:38,626 --> 00:21:40,089
Whoa, Caddy! No, no, no.
439
00:21:40,089 --> 00:21:42,289
Regina George does not have
a good side, okay?
440
00:21:42,289 --> 00:21:43,928
If you go over
to her house today...
441
00:21:43,928 --> 00:21:45,160
I am not joking,
442
00:21:46,097 --> 00:21:47,602
be careful.
443
00:21:58,450 --> 00:22:00,417
♪ Don't be fooled by the pink ♪
444
00:22:00,417 --> 00:22:02,452
♪ She is not playing dolls ♪
445
00:22:02,452 --> 00:22:06,423
♪ She is stalking the halls
For the thrill of the kill ♪
446
00:22:06,423 --> 00:22:10,427
♪ Every person in school
Is aware of her stare ♪
447
00:22:10,427 --> 00:22:14,431
♪ When she tosses her hair
They go perfectly still ♪
448
00:22:14,431 --> 00:22:18,435
♪ All their eyes say
"Don't attack me" ♪
449
00:22:18,435 --> 00:22:22,439
♪ Watch them sweat
And pant and shake ♪
450
00:22:22,439 --> 00:22:26,806
♪ Every food chain
Has its acme ♪
451
00:22:26,806 --> 00:22:29,842
♪ Regina George eats steak ♪
452
00:22:29,842 --> 00:22:34,583
♪ She's the queen of beasts
She can smell your fear ♪
453
00:22:34,583 --> 00:22:38,389
♪ In this biosphere
She's the apex predator ♪
454
00:22:38,389 --> 00:22:40,490
♪ Like a lioness ♪
455
00:22:40,490 --> 00:22:44,252
♪ Only with less fur
Do not mess with her ♪
456
00:22:44,252 --> 00:22:46,155
♪ She's the apex predator ♪
457
00:22:48,863 --> 00:22:51,402
Jason is crotch-sitting
Taylor Wedell.
458
00:22:52,394 --> 00:22:54,438
Absolutely not.
459
00:22:54,438 --> 00:22:56,330
♪ At the watering hole ♪
460
00:22:56,330 --> 00:22:58,167
♪ See the girls
Who weren't nice ♪
461
00:22:58,167 --> 00:23:00,367
♪ Have to scatter like mice ♪
462
00:23:00,367 --> 00:23:02,644
♪ From a jungle cat ♪
463
00:23:02,644 --> 00:23:06,307
♪ And though Janis is great
She does not have this power ♪
464
00:23:06,307 --> 00:23:08,617
♪ People literally cower ♪
465
00:23:08,617 --> 00:23:10,212
♪ Janis can't do that ♪
466
00:23:10,212 --> 00:23:14,491
♪ See her mark her territory ♪
467
00:23:14,491 --> 00:23:17,395
♪ As they follow in her train ♪
468
00:23:18,695 --> 00:23:22,862
♪ They were victims
In their stories ♪
469
00:23:22,862 --> 00:23:26,437
♪ Now they shake their mane ♪
470
00:23:26,437 --> 00:23:30,199
♪ She's the queen of beasts
And you're in her pride ♪
471
00:23:30,199 --> 00:23:32,267
♪ You have hitched a ride ♪
472
00:23:32,267 --> 00:23:34,577
♪ With the apex predator ♪
473
00:23:34,577 --> 00:23:38,581
♪ And it's kind of fun
When she bares her claws ♪
474
00:23:38,581 --> 00:23:40,374
♪ You think
You're safe because ♪
475
00:23:40,374 --> 00:23:42,145
♪ You're with
The apex predator ♪
476
00:23:42,145 --> 00:23:44,378
Do you think she'll be mad
if I like Aaron?
477
00:23:44,378 --> 00:23:46,721
Samuels? Are you unwell?
You can't like
Aaron Samuels!
478
00:23:46,721 --> 00:23:47,821
Okay, okay!
479
00:23:47,821 --> 00:23:49,856
I'll be careful. I promise.
480
00:23:52,564 --> 00:23:56,192
♪ Do not think
You'll be protected ♪
481
00:23:56,192 --> 00:24:00,064
♪ By your new exotic pet ♪
482
00:24:00,064 --> 00:24:04,431
♪ Not a chance
If she suspected ♪
483
00:24:04,431 --> 00:24:07,940
♪ You were any kind
Of reproductive threat ♪
484
00:24:07,940 --> 00:24:10,041
♪ But she doesn't know yet ♪
485
00:24:10,041 --> 00:24:12,406
♪ She doesn't know yet! ♪
486
00:24:12,406 --> 00:24:16,520
♪ She's the queen of beasts
At this beastly school ♪
487
00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:20,249
♪ Got to keep things cool
With the apex predator! ♪
488
00:24:30,096 --> 00:24:31,161
Get in, loser.
489
00:24:34,463 --> 00:24:36,738
♪ With the apex predator! ♪
490
00:24:36,738 --> 00:24:40,775
♪ Will she braid your hair?
Will she eat your heart? ♪
491
00:24:40,775 --> 00:24:44,812
♪ How can you outsmart ♪
492
00:24:44,812 --> 00:24:46,583
♪ The apex predator? ♪
493
00:24:48,983 --> 00:24:50,587
♪ The apex predator? ♪
494
00:24:50,587 --> 00:24:52,523
♪ The apex predator! ♪
495
00:24:53,482 --> 00:24:56,692
You guys! Hey...
496
00:24:57,662 --> 00:25:00,256
Happy hump day, besties!
497
00:25:00,256 --> 00:25:03,127
Hi, Mrs. George.
498
00:25:03,127 --> 00:25:04,634
This is Cady.
499
00:25:04,634 --> 00:25:06,603
I just moved here.
From Kenya.
500
00:25:06,603 --> 00:25:11,102
Welcome, Cady from Kenya.
501
00:25:11,102 --> 00:25:14,974
We haven't had any new meat
in our little lady taco
in so long.
502
00:25:14,974 --> 00:25:16,239
Mom, go make snacks.
503
00:25:16,239 --> 00:25:18,043
For sure.
For sure, Regina, yeah.
504
00:25:18,043 --> 00:25:19,748
Thank you so much,
Mrs. George.
505
00:25:19,748 --> 00:25:21,684
You have a beautiful mansion.
506
00:25:21,684 --> 00:25:25,479
Just slay, queens.
Slay like no one's watching.
507
00:25:25,479 --> 00:25:28,284
But everybody's watching.
Because you're gorgeous!
508
00:25:33,456 --> 00:25:35,599
Wow, your room is really nice.
509
00:25:35,599 --> 00:25:39,130
Thanks.
It used to be my parents',
but I made them trade me.
510
00:25:47,107 --> 00:25:50,504
Cady! I made you
a Spotify playlist
511
00:25:50,504 --> 00:25:52,781
to help you catch up
on culture.
512
00:25:52,781 --> 00:25:56,048
Karen, come here.
I want to fix your eyebrows.
513
00:25:56,048 --> 00:25:57,181
Can I still have two?
514
00:25:57,181 --> 00:25:59,689
Gretchen, move.
Sorry.
515
00:25:59,689 --> 00:26:02,450
God, my hips are so wide.
516
00:26:02,450 --> 00:26:04,089
God, my pores are huge!
517
00:26:04,089 --> 00:26:06,058
I want skin like Cady's.
518
00:26:07,127 --> 00:26:09,193
My B.O. smells like crayons.
519
00:26:12,099 --> 00:26:15,166
Um, me, too! I'm ugly, too.
520
00:26:15,166 --> 00:26:17,641
Oh, my God, I love her.
She's like a Martian.
521
00:26:17,641 --> 00:26:19,533
Who's hungry?
522
00:26:19,533 --> 00:26:21,007
Now, Cady,
523
00:26:21,007 --> 00:26:24,538
this is a very American snack
called guac.
524
00:26:24,538 --> 00:26:26,914
Is it okay or are you vegan?
525
00:26:26,914 --> 00:26:28,949
Oh, no, I'm an omnivore.
526
00:26:28,949 --> 00:26:31,017
Yum-yum-yum. Okay, come here!
527
00:26:31,017 --> 00:26:33,888
I need you
to tell me everything.
528
00:26:33,888 --> 00:26:36,990
Have you seen any boys
that you think are cute yet?
529
00:26:36,990 --> 00:26:40,290
Oh. Uh, well, I...
530
00:26:40,290 --> 00:26:41,929
No.
531
00:26:41,929 --> 00:26:44,393
Well, don't worry.
It's just a matter of time.
532
00:26:44,393 --> 00:26:48,199
You know, I always say
that this school district
has the highest taxes,
533
00:26:48,199 --> 00:26:50,839
but the hottest boys.
That's disgusting.
534
00:26:50,839 --> 00:26:53,336
Oh, Regina!
You're never gonna believe
what I found
535
00:26:53,336 --> 00:26:54,744
in your closet this morning.
536
00:26:54,744 --> 00:26:56,339
Why were you in my closet?
537
00:26:56,339 --> 00:26:58,209
Because I'm doing
that Japanese organizing thing
538
00:26:58,209 --> 00:27:00,882
where you take a little nap
in the closet.
539
00:27:02,378 --> 00:27:05,546
I found your Burn Book!
540
00:27:05,546 --> 00:27:08,450
Cady, this is just, like,
the funniest thing
541
00:27:08,450 --> 00:27:09,924
that the girls used to do.
542
00:27:09,924 --> 00:27:11,387
Please leave.
You got it, baby.
543
00:27:11,387 --> 00:27:13,158
But, girls, I'm gonna be
right downstairs
544
00:27:13,158 --> 00:27:15,061
if you need to talk to me
about anything.
545
00:27:15,061 --> 00:27:19,098
I mean it. Deep stuff
or boy troubles or blackheads
546
00:27:19,098 --> 00:27:21,430
or alcohol poisoning.
547
00:27:21,430 --> 00:27:23,597
You know, I have
been through it all.
548
00:27:23,597 --> 00:27:26,270
Honey, I am not a regular mom.
549
00:27:26,270 --> 00:27:29,240
I'm {coolmom with six O's.
550
00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:31,407
Hashtag AgingHotly. Hashtag...
551
00:27:31,407 --> 00:27:33,442
Get out.
Okay.
552
00:27:33,442 --> 00:27:35,917
Girls, just have so much fun.
553
00:27:35,917 --> 00:27:40,284
Remember,
these are the best days
of your life.
554
00:27:41,452 --> 00:27:43,518
It does not get better.
555
00:27:46,292 --> 00:27:49,700
I remember this.
It was the week they took
all of our phones away.
556
00:27:52,298 --> 00:27:55,431
"Trang Pham is
a grotsky little byotch."
557
00:27:55,431 --> 00:27:56,905
Still true.
558
00:27:56,905 --> 00:27:59,941
"Dawn Schweitzer
is a horny shrimp."
559
00:27:59,941 --> 00:28:01,635
Well, she's taller now.
560
00:28:01,635 --> 00:28:05,375
Oh, my God.
"Janis 'Imi'ike, Pyro-Lez."
561
00:28:05,375 --> 00:28:06,849
I forgot about that.
562
00:28:06,849 --> 00:28:08,477
Oh, my God, she is so weird.
563
00:28:08,477 --> 00:28:10,512
She is? She's in my homeroom.
564
00:28:10,512 --> 00:28:13,548
Oh, well, watch out,
'cause she's violent.
565
00:28:13,548 --> 00:28:15,792
Yeah, people think
she's really good at art,
566
00:28:15,792 --> 00:28:17,959
but it's just 'cause
she had to do art therapy.
567
00:28:17,959 --> 00:28:20,654
Yeah, Regina tried
to be friends with her
in middle school.
568
00:28:20,654 --> 00:28:22,194
Oh, my God,
she was obsessed with me.
569
00:28:22,194 --> 00:28:24,625
And then when I got
my first boyfriend, Kyle,
570
00:28:24,625 --> 00:28:26,660
she lit my backpack on fire.
571
00:28:28,235 --> 00:28:29,630
Who's that?
572
00:28:29,630 --> 00:28:32,006
Mmm...
That's that kid Damian.
573
00:28:32,006 --> 00:28:34,470
Oh, yeah, he's almost too gay
to function.
574
00:28:36,175 --> 00:28:38,144
No, I didn't... I didn't
mean that in a bad way.
575
00:28:38,144 --> 00:28:40,245
No, that's funny.
Put that in there.
576
00:28:40,245 --> 00:28:41,378
Um...
577
00:28:42,579 --> 00:28:44,480
No, I don't...
Oh! No, no.
578
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:46,614
Don't worry, Cady,
we only write stuff
about randos in here.
579
00:28:46,614 --> 00:28:49,859
Friends are, like,
very deserving of respect.
580
00:28:49,859 --> 00:28:52,356
Gretchen... she gets it.
581
00:28:53,062 --> 00:28:54,127
Go find the shoes.
582
00:28:56,228 --> 00:28:58,560
The shoes we're giving
to Cady.
583
00:28:58,560 --> 00:29:01,970
Oh, my God, you are literally
being so annoying.
584
00:29:03,732 --> 00:29:04,599
Sorry.
585
00:29:14,347 --> 00:29:15,643
Are you okay?
586
00:29:15,643 --> 00:29:17,711
No... uh, totally.
587
00:29:17,711 --> 00:29:19,614
Regina's just joking.
588
00:29:19,614 --> 00:29:21,418
These are cute. Try 'em.
589
00:29:23,686 --> 00:29:26,192
Once I processed that Regina's
love language is anger,
590
00:29:26,192 --> 00:29:27,292
it's been much...
591
00:29:28,658 --> 00:29:31,098
Aw.
592
00:29:31,098 --> 00:29:33,969
It's the music box
I gave Regina
that my abuelito gave me.
593
00:29:43,739 --> 00:29:46,410
♪ Tell me
What's wrong with me ♪
594
00:29:46,410 --> 00:29:48,984
♪ My body, face, my hair ♪
595
00:29:50,020 --> 00:29:53,747
♪ Tell me all my many faults ♪
596
00:29:53,747 --> 00:29:55,617
♪ Tell me like you care ♪
597
00:29:55,617 --> 00:29:58,961
♪ When we both
Know you're cruel ♪
598
00:29:58,961 --> 00:30:02,294
♪ And we both know
You're right ♪
599
00:30:02,294 --> 00:30:05,561
♪ I could listen to you ♪
600
00:30:05,561 --> 00:30:08,663
♪ Like a fool all night ♪
601
00:30:08,663 --> 00:30:11,765
♪ What's wrong with me? ♪
602
00:30:11,765 --> 00:30:14,801
♪ How I speak?
How I dress? ♪
603
00:30:14,801 --> 00:30:18,343
♪ What's wrong with me? ♪
604
00:30:18,343 --> 00:30:21,918
♪ You keep me guessing ♪
605
00:30:21,918 --> 00:30:27,088
♪ Mama called me "beautiful"
Don't believe her anymore ♪
606
00:30:27,088 --> 00:30:30,619
♪ Now I'm listening to you ♪
607
00:30:30,619 --> 00:30:33,963
♪ What do I do that for? ♪
608
00:30:33,963 --> 00:30:39,870
♪ Please don't ignore me ♪
609
00:30:45,075 --> 00:30:46,305
Gretchen!
610
00:30:46,305 --> 00:30:47,944
What are you doing in there?
611
00:30:47,944 --> 00:30:49,473
I'm... I'm gonna go.
612
00:30:49,473 --> 00:30:51,673
Yep. Be right there!
613
00:30:56,678 --> 00:30:58,955
♪ What's wrong with me?
What can I do? ♪
614
00:30:58,955 --> 00:31:01,683
♪ What's wrong with me?
Could it be you? ♪
615
00:31:01,683 --> 00:31:03,289
♪ It's probably me ♪
616
00:31:03,289 --> 00:31:06,127
♪ See that? You see? ♪
617
00:31:06,127 --> 00:31:09,295
♪ What's wrong with me? ♪
618
00:31:22,574 --> 00:31:25,146
They have this book,
this "Burn Book,"
619
00:31:25,146 --> 00:31:27,280
where they write mean things
about girls in our grade.
620
00:31:27,280 --> 00:31:29,414
Ooh, ooh! What does
it say about me?
621
00:31:30,252 --> 00:31:32,351
Um... you're not in it.
622
00:31:32,881 --> 00:31:34,320
Those bitches!
623
00:31:34,320 --> 00:31:35,882
What is this, by the way?
It's terrible.
624
00:31:35,882 --> 00:31:37,587
Oh, it's a Kälteen bar.
625
00:31:37,587 --> 00:31:39,820
Here, my mom used to give them
to elderly people in Kapedo
626
00:31:39,820 --> 00:31:42,097
to help them
gain weight.
Mmm.
627
00:31:42,097 --> 00:31:43,967
I can feel it working.
628
00:31:43,967 --> 00:31:46,398
We should, like, crush this up
and put it in Regina's food!
629
00:31:46,398 --> 00:31:47,894
What?
Oh.
630
00:31:47,894 --> 00:31:49,467
No. No, no.
631
00:31:49,467 --> 00:31:51,337
I will keep having
lunch with them, that's it.
632
00:31:51,337 --> 00:31:54,505
Also, we feel bad
we yelled at you
633
00:31:54,505 --> 00:31:56,210
about liking Aaron.
634
00:31:56,210 --> 00:31:58,542
You should go
for what you want.
635
00:31:58,542 --> 00:32:00,874
Hetero allyship.
Oh, okay.
636
00:32:00,874 --> 00:32:03,679
It's so dumb. I only
ever see him in Calc anyway.
637
00:32:03,679 --> 00:32:07,386
Oh. You're definitely
safe in Calc.
638
00:32:07,386 --> 00:32:09,256
Regina will never set foot
in there.
639
00:32:22,733 --> 00:32:24,799
New shoes?
Uh, yeah.
640
00:32:24,799 --> 00:32:26,537
Regina gave them to me.
641
00:32:26,537 --> 00:32:29,210
Huh. I didn't know
you guys were friends.
642
00:32:29,210 --> 00:32:31,047
Okay, let's get back into it.
643
00:32:31,047 --> 00:32:32,741
Continuity.
Removable discont...
644
00:32:32,741 --> 00:32:34,083
Cady? Eyes up front, please.
645
00:32:35,449 --> 00:32:37,713
Let's get back
into where we were Thursday.
646
00:32:37,713 --> 00:32:39,781
Who was awake Thursday?
Who was still awake?
647
00:32:41,488 --> 00:32:43,356
I like your jacket.
648
00:32:43,356 --> 00:32:44,720
Thanks, I made it.
649
00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:46,590
But why do you sew
on top of your drawings?
650
00:32:46,590 --> 00:32:49,461
It's... like the drawings
are facts
651
00:32:49,461 --> 00:32:50,891
and the threads are feelings.
652
00:32:50,891 --> 00:32:53,069
It's so cool.
653
00:32:55,634 --> 00:32:58,404
So, you talk to your man yet?
654
00:33:00,175 --> 00:33:02,111
I mean, I don't even
know what to say to him.
655
00:33:02,111 --> 00:33:05,246
I always come off sounding
like a lunatic.
656
00:33:05,246 --> 00:33:07,182
Do you like gum?
Sure.
657
00:33:08,449 --> 00:33:10,944
Oh, I don't have any.
I was just...
658
00:33:10,944 --> 00:33:13,221
Oh.
659
00:33:15,852 --> 00:33:19,755
What?
Why did you say that?
660
00:33:19,755 --> 00:33:23,132
Maybe just try to have
one successful interaction
per day?
661
00:33:26,137 --> 00:33:28,434
I like your shirt.
Thanks.
662
00:33:28,434 --> 00:33:30,667
It smells like sausage
from the last time I wore it.
663
00:33:34,178 --> 00:33:36,002
Dear God, woman.
664
00:33:36,002 --> 00:33:39,379
Have you successfully been
a functioning human being
even once?
665
00:33:41,152 --> 00:33:44,648
On October 3rd,
he asked me what day it was.
666
00:33:44,648 --> 00:33:47,354
What day is it?
It's October 3rd.
667
00:33:47,354 --> 00:33:51,424
♪ October 3rd ♪
668
00:33:51,424 --> 00:33:53,063
That was two weeks ago.
669
00:33:54,429 --> 00:33:55,956
But today I kind of...
670
00:33:55,956 --> 00:33:57,298
I don't know,
I tried something
671
00:33:57,298 --> 00:34:00,169
and it just came to me
instinctively.
672
00:34:01,997 --> 00:34:03,502
I said I was lost.
673
00:34:03,502 --> 00:34:06,175
I'm totally lost.
Can you help me?
674
00:34:07,178 --> 00:34:08,672
But I wasn't lost.
675
00:34:08,672 --> 00:34:10,443
I knew exactly what
Ms. Norbury was talking about.
676
00:34:10,443 --> 00:34:14,040
It's the derivative
of the natural log function.
677
00:34:14,040 --> 00:34:16,746
You just take the reciprocal
of the ln.
678
00:34:18,453 --> 00:34:19,353
Thanks.
679
00:34:20,587 --> 00:34:22,653
You're so smart.
680
00:34:24,756 --> 00:34:25,887
He was wrong.
681
00:34:25,887 --> 00:34:27,625
Wait, wait. Hold up.
682
00:34:27,625 --> 00:34:29,561
Guys, pause!
Oh.
683
00:34:32,368 --> 00:34:34,170
You pretended to be dumb
684
00:34:34,170 --> 00:34:36,700
so you could keep talking
to a guy?
685
00:34:36,700 --> 00:34:39,571
Uh... Yeah. It worked.
686
00:34:39,571 --> 00:34:41,408
'Cause that shit
always works, Caddy.
687
00:34:41,408 --> 00:34:43,036
It doesn't mean
that it's not evil.
688
00:34:43,036 --> 00:34:46,116
Fracking "works."
Red-lining "works."
689
00:34:46,116 --> 00:34:48,118
Gasoline and rags...
690
00:34:48,118 --> 00:34:50,549
Aren't you worried
Regina will eat your face
if she finds out?
691
00:34:50,549 --> 00:34:52,353
No, she won't find out.
692
00:34:52,353 --> 00:34:55,719
It's just my little
Calculus class secret.
693
00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:58,359
Oh, um...
694
00:34:58,359 --> 00:35:01,263
So its h prime of x
equals five.
695
00:35:01,263 --> 00:35:03,232
You just forgot
the Product Rule.
696
00:35:03,232 --> 00:35:04,959
I don't get any of this.
697
00:35:06,567 --> 00:35:07,665
Nice job, Cady.
698
00:35:07,665 --> 00:35:09,502
It sure seems like you get it.
699
00:35:15,246 --> 00:35:19,941
Hey, my friend Chris is, uh,
having a Halloween party.
700
00:35:19,941 --> 00:35:21,646
Would you want
to come to that?
701
00:35:21,646 --> 00:35:24,077
It's like a costume party.
People get pretty into it.
702
00:35:24,077 --> 00:35:25,848
Grool.
703
00:35:25,848 --> 00:35:28,752
I meant to say "great," and
then I started to say "cool."
704
00:35:28,752 --> 00:35:29,951
Okay.
705
00:35:30,657 --> 00:35:31,854
Grool.
706
00:35:37,499 --> 00:35:38,861
Hi.
707
00:35:38,861 --> 00:35:40,401
♪ If I could change the world ♪
708
00:35:40,401 --> 00:35:44,471
♪ I'd make it Halloween ♪
709
00:35:45,540 --> 00:35:48,475
♪ Every single day ♪
710
00:35:48,475 --> 00:35:51,973
♪ And also have world peace ♪
711
00:35:51,973 --> 00:35:55,108
♪ Maybe world peace
Should be first ♪
712
00:35:55,108 --> 00:35:57,781
♪ World peace
And then Halloween ♪
713
00:35:57,781 --> 00:35:59,255
Wait, let me start over.
714
00:36:02,423 --> 00:36:03,754
Hi.
715
00:36:03,754 --> 00:36:05,151
♪ If I could change the world ♪
716
00:36:05,151 --> 00:36:09,628
♪ I'd make us have world peace ♪
717
00:36:09,628 --> 00:36:13,566
♪ And also Halloween ♪
718
00:36:13,566 --> 00:36:15,997
♪ Every single day ♪
719
00:36:15,997 --> 00:36:17,636
♪ On Halloween ♪
720
00:36:17,636 --> 00:36:21,673
♪ You can pretend
To be someone else ♪
721
00:36:21,673 --> 00:36:24,445
♪ It's like the Internet ♪
722
00:36:24,445 --> 00:36:30,451
♪ Only in person
And with candy ♪
723
00:36:30,451 --> 00:36:33,520
Wait. Mama,
use the back camera.
724
00:36:33,520 --> 00:36:37,084
It's prettier 'cause science.
725
00:36:37,084 --> 00:36:38,921
♪ When you are
The hot one ♪
726
00:36:38,921 --> 00:36:40,692
♪ It's a full-time gig ♪
727
00:36:40,692 --> 00:36:43,794
♪ Lookin' like what people
Want to see ♪
728
00:36:43,794 --> 00:36:47,600
♪ Once a year I'm not
I dress up and dream big ♪
729
00:36:47,600 --> 00:36:49,800
♪ Disguised as someone else
Who is not me ♪
730
00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:51,406
♪ But is still hot! ♪
731
00:36:51,406 --> 00:36:52,704
♪ I can be ♪
732
00:36:52,704 --> 00:36:55,311
♪ Who I want to be and sexy! ♪
733
00:36:55,311 --> 00:36:58,677
♪ I can be
Who I want to be and hot! ♪
734
00:36:58,677 --> 00:37:02,384
♪ Don't like who you are
Then hit that costume shop ♪
735
00:37:02,384 --> 00:37:06,179
♪ Rock a new
And different sexy look ♪
736
00:37:06,179 --> 00:37:09,490
♪ Why be so downhearted?
Blast some trashy pop ♪
737
00:37:09,490 --> 00:37:12,790
♪ And drop it to this hot
And sexy hook ♪
738
00:37:12,790 --> 00:37:16,992
♪ I can be
Who I want to be and sexy! ♪
739
00:37:16,992 --> 00:37:20,567
♪ I can be
Who I want to be and hot! ♪
740
00:37:20,567 --> 00:37:23,702
♪ Be somebody new ♪
741
00:37:23,702 --> 00:37:27,871
♪ Do a total transformation ♪
742
00:37:27,871 --> 00:37:31,347
♪ Animal or mineral, too ♪
743
00:37:31,347 --> 00:37:35,417
♪ Or even vegetation! ♪
744
00:37:35,417 --> 00:37:37,177
I give you sexy corn.
745
00:37:37,177 --> 00:37:40,455
♪ I can be who I want to be ♪
746
00:37:40,455 --> 00:37:43,425
♪ And sexy! ♪
747
00:37:54,196 --> 00:37:55,866
Why are you dressed so scary?
748
00:37:55,866 --> 00:37:57,230
It's Halloween.
749
00:37:57,230 --> 00:37:58,869
Cady,
if you don't dress slutty,
750
00:37:58,869 --> 00:38:00,574
that is slut-shaming us.
751
00:38:05,944 --> 00:38:09,418
Um, it's just,
like, traditionally,
752
00:38:09,418 --> 00:38:11,178
girls had to be witches
or clowns
753
00:38:11,178 --> 00:38:14,181
and we've worked really hard
to progress past that.
754
00:38:14,181 --> 00:38:15,985
That makes sense.
755
00:38:18,462 --> 00:38:20,528
I'm gonna go find Aaron.
756
00:38:20,528 --> 00:38:21,595
Okay.
757
00:38:23,960 --> 00:38:26,699
♪ A sexy Quint
From sexy Jaws ♪
758
00:38:26,699 --> 00:38:28,404
♪ Catching sexy sharks ♪
759
00:38:28,404 --> 00:38:31,968
♪ Sexy Eleanor Roosevelt
Or sexy Joan of Arc ♪
760
00:38:31,968 --> 00:38:35,741
♪ I can be a sexy pirate
Or a sexy ballet dancer ♪
761
00:38:35,741 --> 00:38:40,581
♪ I can be a sexy doctor
And cure some sexy cancer! ♪
762
00:38:40,581 --> 00:38:42,616
That's not right,
is it?
No.
763
00:38:43,685 --> 00:38:45,586
I can sexy cure some cancer?
764
00:38:45,586 --> 00:38:47,082
No.
765
00:38:47,082 --> 00:38:49,216
I can cure sex cancer!
766
00:38:49,216 --> 00:38:51,284
Sex cancer doesn't exist.
767
00:38:51,284 --> 00:38:53,594
I did it.
768
00:38:53,594 --> 00:38:54,595
Dance break.
769
00:39:06,708 --> 00:39:08,477
♪ Happy Halloween! ♪
770
00:39:12,043 --> 00:39:15,946
♪ This is
Modern feminism talkin' ♪
771
00:39:15,946 --> 00:39:19,521
♪ Watch me as I run the world
In shoes I cannot walk in ♪
772
00:39:19,521 --> 00:39:22,953
♪ I can be who I want to be ♪
773
00:39:22,953 --> 00:39:26,594
♪ And sex... sex ♪
774
00:39:26,594 --> 00:39:30,697
♪ Sexy! ♪
775
00:39:32,162 --> 00:39:34,998
I'm a sexy mouse. Duh!
776
00:39:38,507 --> 00:39:40,003
Hey.
Hi.
777
00:39:40,003 --> 00:39:41,334
Cady!
778
00:39:41,334 --> 00:39:43,006
Hi!
779
00:39:43,006 --> 00:39:45,338
- Ow.
- Hey.
780
00:39:45,338 --> 00:39:47,043
I like your costume.
781
00:39:47,043 --> 00:39:48,946
Different
from everyone else's.
782
00:39:48,946 --> 00:39:51,817
I didn't know
I was supposed to...
783
00:39:53,016 --> 00:39:54,721
I'm such a weird
foreign loser.
784
00:39:54,721 --> 00:39:56,349
No. It's great.
785
00:39:57,660 --> 00:39:58,890
You want a drink?
786
00:39:58,890 --> 00:40:00,958
Thanks.
Uh, do they have juice?
787
00:40:02,423 --> 00:40:04,225
I can check. Wait here.
788
00:40:06,900 --> 00:40:09,868
I think you and Aaron
would be a really cute couple.
789
00:40:09,868 --> 00:40:11,199
Really?
Yeah.
790
00:40:11,199 --> 00:40:12,739
I just said so.
Don't be thirsty.
791
00:40:12,739 --> 00:40:15,973
You know, I could talk
to him for you. If you want.
792
00:40:15,973 --> 00:40:18,239
See if he likes you back.
793
00:40:18,239 --> 00:40:20,582
You would do that for me?
Mm-hmm.
794
00:40:20,582 --> 00:40:23,178
Trust me. I know exactly
how to play it.
795
00:40:26,887 --> 00:40:29,382
I need to talk to you.
Me?
796
00:40:29,382 --> 00:40:31,186
I thought you were done
talking to me
797
00:40:31,186 --> 00:40:32,924
when you started talking
to Shane last summer.
798
00:40:32,924 --> 00:40:36,257
Shut up. 'Cause you know
that homeschooled girl, Cady?
799
00:40:37,392 --> 00:40:38,897
Yeah, I invited her tonight.
800
00:40:40,230 --> 00:40:41,900
Yeah, well, be careful.
801
00:40:41,900 --> 00:40:43,638
'Cause she has
a huge crush on you.
802
00:40:43,638 --> 00:40:46,432
Really?
803
00:40:46,432 --> 00:40:48,038
Don't be gross.
804
00:40:48,678 --> 00:40:50,546
She's my friend and...
805
00:40:50,546 --> 00:40:54,275
...she's, like, really
inexperienced and, um...
806
00:40:59,986 --> 00:41:02,382
Wow, sorry.
807
00:41:02,382 --> 00:41:04,450
I didn't think this
would be so hard for me.
808
00:41:04,450 --> 00:41:05,726
What?
809
00:41:05,726 --> 00:41:07,255
I don't know,
I guess I just...
810
00:41:07,255 --> 00:41:10,456
just have, like, a lot
of, like, unresolved trauma
811
00:41:10,456 --> 00:41:12,227
from how things ended with us.
812
00:41:12,227 --> 00:41:13,734
Give me a break.
813
00:41:17,608 --> 00:41:18,640
Regina.
814
00:41:20,809 --> 00:41:22,611
Regina.
Leave me alone.
815
00:41:22,611 --> 00:41:24,547
G, why are you upset?
816
00:41:24,547 --> 00:41:25,779
Please.
817
00:41:25,779 --> 00:41:28,947
What do you mean,
please? G!
818
00:41:41,599 --> 00:41:44,600
♪ Yes, I look perfect ♪
819
00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:47,064
♪ Ice Queen
That's what you see ♪
820
00:41:47,064 --> 00:41:50,463
♪ It's what they all expect
From me ♪
821
00:41:50,463 --> 00:41:53,400
♪ But it's all show ♪
822
00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:56,238
♪ Face it, you used me ♪
823
00:41:56,238 --> 00:41:59,043
♪ You saw the sexy clothes ♪
824
00:41:59,043 --> 00:42:02,882
♪ My supermodel pose ♪
825
00:42:02,882 --> 00:42:05,181
♪ What did you know? ♪
826
00:42:05,181 --> 00:42:08,349
♪ Was I a game to you? ♪
827
00:42:08,349 --> 00:42:11,187
♪ Was I a way to be cool? ♪
828
00:42:11,187 --> 00:42:14,487
♪ I truly cared ♪
829
00:42:14,487 --> 00:42:17,325
♪ Was I the fool? ♪
830
00:42:17,325 --> 00:42:19,932
♪ It's fine for you ♪
831
00:42:19,932 --> 00:42:23,133
♪ It's fine to flirt ♪
832
00:42:23,133 --> 00:42:28,138
♪ It's fine ♪
833
00:42:28,138 --> 00:42:29,711
♪ Till someone gets hurt ♪
834
00:42:35,576 --> 00:42:38,049
♪ Feel my heart beating? ♪
835
00:42:38,049 --> 00:42:41,184
♪ I'm just like her or you ♪
836
00:42:41,184 --> 00:42:44,352
♪ People forget I'm human, too ♪
837
00:42:44,352 --> 00:42:46,519
♪ Yes, they do that ♪
838
00:42:47,830 --> 00:42:50,556
♪ This is performance ♪
839
00:42:50,556 --> 00:42:53,669
♪ This is all self-defense ♪
840
00:42:53,669 --> 00:42:56,804
♪ I thought you had the sense ♪
841
00:42:56,804 --> 00:42:59,334
♪ To see through that ♪
842
00:42:59,334 --> 00:43:02,238
♪ Was I too proud with you? ♪
843
00:43:02,238 --> 00:43:05,648
♪ Was I too cold
And forbidding? ♪
844
00:43:05,648 --> 00:43:08,849
♪ You chose her over me
Well ♪
845
00:43:08,849 --> 00:43:11,346
♪ Are you kidding? ♪
846
00:43:11,346 --> 00:43:13,920
♪ It's fine for you ♪
847
00:43:13,920 --> 00:43:16,285
♪ It's fine to flirt ♪
848
00:43:17,156 --> 00:43:22,027
♪ It's fine ♪
849
00:43:22,027 --> 00:43:24,062
♪ Till someone gets hurt ♪
850
00:43:28,266 --> 00:43:33,533
♪ Till someone gets hurt! ♪
851
00:43:35,405 --> 00:43:37,075
♪ Poor little me ♪
852
00:43:37,075 --> 00:43:41,079
♪ I'm trapped
In this fabulous show ♪
853
00:43:41,079 --> 00:43:43,950
♪ You could set me free ♪
854
00:43:43,950 --> 00:43:48,757
♪ But if you're going, go ♪
855
00:43:51,256 --> 00:43:54,356
♪ It's fine for you ♪
856
00:43:54,356 --> 00:43:57,128
♪ It's fine to flirt ♪
857
00:43:57,128 --> 00:44:00,395
♪ And, God, you're hot! ♪
858
00:44:00,395 --> 00:44:03,365
♪ Why do you even
Wear a shirt? ♪
859
00:44:03,365 --> 00:44:07,402
♪ No, it's fine ♪
860
00:44:07,402 --> 00:44:09,536
♪ Damn, you're fine! ♪
861
00:44:09,536 --> 00:44:14,783
♪ And it's fine ♪
862
00:44:14,783 --> 00:44:16,081
♪ Till someone gets... ♪
863
00:44:44,540 --> 00:44:47,948
She took him back.
She took Aaron back.
864
00:44:47,948 --> 00:44:49,917
Of course she did.
865
00:44:49,917 --> 00:44:52,678
It's because Regina's
a life ruiner!
866
00:44:52,678 --> 00:44:54,284
When we were in sixth grade,
she told everybody
867
00:44:54,284 --> 00:44:55,857
that Janis was...
Damian!
868
00:44:55,857 --> 00:44:57,958
Okay. She does not need
to hear that right now.
869
00:44:57,958 --> 00:45:00,158
No, I know the story.
870
00:45:00,158 --> 00:45:02,831
You lit a fire 'cause Regina
got a boyfriend.
871
00:45:02,831 --> 00:45:04,426
She said what?
872
00:45:04,426 --> 00:45:05,801
Oh, hell no.
873
00:45:05,801 --> 00:45:09,266
Damian...
No! The truth
will be told.
874
00:45:09,266 --> 00:45:10,498
Stay with me, Cady.
875
00:45:15,010 --> 00:45:18,407
Like all history,
this is emotionally layered
and culturally dense.
876
00:45:22,248 --> 00:45:24,853
Janis and Regina were
best friends in middle school.
877
00:45:24,853 --> 00:45:29,121
And at that time, females
expressed their identities
through collectible plushies.
878
00:45:29,121 --> 00:45:30,859
I don't know what those...
879
00:45:30,859 --> 00:45:35,160
It's these bastards.
And they were everywhere.
880
00:45:35,160 --> 00:45:38,724
Regina gave Janis a BFF set
for her birthday.
881
00:45:38,724 --> 00:45:41,001
Janis put a rainbow patch
on hers.
882
00:45:41,001 --> 00:45:42,838
This is how she came out
to her friend.
883
00:45:42,838 --> 00:45:44,268
And Regina put one
on hers, too,
884
00:45:44,268 --> 00:45:47,073
out of allyship because
she used to be human.
885
00:45:47,073 --> 00:45:52,045
Cut to eight months later,
Regina becomes obsessed
with this gross boy. Kyle!
886
00:45:52,045 --> 00:45:54,443
Your scale is
completely off.
Hush!
887
00:45:56,414 --> 00:45:58,678
One night, they were
all playing spin the bottle...
888
00:45:58,678 --> 00:46:01,681
And Regina was worried
that Kyle liked Karen more.
889
00:46:01,681 --> 00:46:05,058
So when she spun
and got Janis,
890
00:46:05,896 --> 00:46:07,423
Regina put on a little show.
891
00:46:10,998 --> 00:46:12,461
And Kyle was like "boing"!
892
00:46:12,461 --> 00:46:13,902
And Regina was like...
893
00:46:13,902 --> 00:46:15,332
..."I knew she would let me!
894
00:46:15,332 --> 00:46:17,807
She's, like,
obsessed with me!"
895
00:46:17,807 --> 00:46:19,237
Not okay.
896
00:46:19,237 --> 00:46:21,206
Please put this all back
in its box.
897
00:46:21,206 --> 00:46:23,043
They got into a huge fight.
898
00:46:23,043 --> 00:46:25,012
Regina started avoiding Janis
at school,
899
00:46:25,012 --> 00:46:26,882
but did she give back
that plush animal?
900
00:46:26,882 --> 00:46:29,742
Oh, no.
She took it everywhere.
901
00:46:29,742 --> 00:46:32,580
She named her "Sissy Liz"
and she made everyone say
902
00:46:32,580 --> 00:46:33,955
"good morning" to it
every day,
903
00:46:33,955 --> 00:46:35,352
and it was very weird
and boring.
904
00:46:35,352 --> 00:46:36,617
Fast forward.
905
00:46:36,617 --> 00:46:38,553
One day in Science,
906
00:46:38,553 --> 00:46:41,259
Regina was making everyone
say hi to Sissy Liz.
907
00:46:41,259 --> 00:46:43,261
And Janis finally heard it.
908
00:46:43,261 --> 00:46:45,868
"Sissy Liz" was short
for "Obsessed Lesbian."
909
00:46:45,868 --> 00:46:48,970
Regina had been making fun
of Janis this entire time
910
00:46:48,970 --> 00:46:50,301
and everyone but her knew it.
911
00:46:51,337 --> 00:46:53,469
So, and this is regrettable...
912
00:46:55,880 --> 00:46:57,275
Janis took
her Bunsen burner...
913
00:46:59,180 --> 00:47:01,807
and torched the doll.
914
00:47:01,807 --> 00:47:04,117
And Regina's backpack
caught on fire a little bit
915
00:47:04,117 --> 00:47:07,318
and Janis was kicked
out of school
for the remainder of the year.
916
00:47:07,318 --> 00:47:09,815
And the adults
didn't know why.
917
00:47:09,815 --> 00:47:12,191
Janis just seemed crazy.
918
00:47:14,558 --> 00:47:16,492
I'm really sorry
that happened.
919
00:47:18,463 --> 00:47:20,034
It's worse than my thing.
920
00:47:21,532 --> 00:47:23,235
Caddy, don't be sorry.
921
00:47:23,235 --> 00:47:26,601
Now you know Regina George
is not your friend.
922
00:47:26,601 --> 00:47:28,405
We are your friends.
923
00:47:28,405 --> 00:47:29,912
And we're gonna
make her pay.
924
00:47:33,773 --> 00:47:35,016
♪ You know what friends do? ♪
925
00:47:35,016 --> 00:47:37,018
♪ They got your back ♪
926
00:47:37,018 --> 00:47:39,955
♪ And they are fun
To be around ♪♪ Whoa ♪
927
00:47:39,955 --> 00:47:42,155
♪ When someone hurts you
Then they attack ♪
928
00:47:42,155 --> 00:47:44,685
♪ And grind your foe
Into the ground! ♪
929
00:47:44,685 --> 00:47:46,588
♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪
930
00:47:46,588 --> 00:47:49,129
♪ Imagine a party
With dresses and cake ♪
931
00:47:49,129 --> 00:47:52,099
♪ And singing and dancing
And cake ♪
932
00:47:52,099 --> 00:47:55,465
♪ And there's a magic act
That saws Regina in half ♪
933
00:47:55,465 --> 00:47:59,073
♪ And this time
It'll take ♪
934
00:47:59,073 --> 00:48:03,308
Now that's a party!
♪ It's a revenge party
A party that ends ♪
935
00:48:03,308 --> 00:48:05,541
♪ With somebody's head
On a spike ♪
936
00:48:05,541 --> 00:48:09,512
♪ It's a revenge party
With your two best friends ♪
937
00:48:09,512 --> 00:48:12,251
♪ It's like a party
With revenge
Is what it's like ♪
938
00:48:13,749 --> 00:48:15,188
Caddy, in order
for this to work,
939
00:48:15,188 --> 00:48:16,783
you need to act
like a huge phony.
940
00:48:16,783 --> 00:48:18,257
Can you do it?
941
00:48:18,257 --> 00:48:19,456
I... I think so.
942
00:48:19,456 --> 00:48:21,326
Practice.
943
00:48:21,326 --> 00:48:24,362
Regina wanted me to tell you
that she tried
to talk to Aaron,
944
00:48:24,362 --> 00:48:27,563
but he just wanted her back,
and that's not Regina's fault.
945
00:48:27,563 --> 00:48:29,301
Of course. Oh, my gosh.
946
00:48:30,205 --> 00:48:31,666
Love ya. See you at lunch.
947
00:48:31,666 --> 00:48:34,570
Perfect!
On to phase two.
948
00:48:34,570 --> 00:48:36,979
♪ I'll bring
The glow sticks ♪
949
00:48:36,979 --> 00:48:39,982
♪ I'll bring balloons
And we'll have
Chocolate ice cream cones ♪
950
00:48:39,982 --> 00:48:41,709
♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪
951
00:48:41,709 --> 00:48:44,217
♪ I'll be the DJ
Spinnin' the tunes ♪
952
00:48:44,217 --> 00:48:47,286
♪ On a turntable made
Of her bones ♪
953
00:48:47,286 --> 00:48:50,586
♪ We'll get a piñata
'Cause that would be fun ♪
954
00:48:50,586 --> 00:48:52,159
♪ And play dress up
And Barbies ♪
955
00:48:52,159 --> 00:48:53,787
♪ And tag ♪
956
00:48:53,787 --> 00:48:55,228
♪ And we'll roll on the grass ♪
957
00:48:55,228 --> 00:48:57,065
♪ And stare up at the sun ♪
958
00:48:57,065 --> 00:48:59,925
♪ Then we'll stuff her remains
In a bag ♪
959
00:48:59,925 --> 00:49:01,729
♪ And throw 'em in the river! ♪
960
00:49:01,729 --> 00:49:05,040
♪ A revenge party
A party that ends ♪
961
00:49:05,040 --> 00:49:07,735
♪ With entrails
All over the lawn ♪
962
00:49:07,735 --> 00:49:11,013
♪ A revenge party
With your two best friends ♪
963
00:49:11,013 --> 00:49:13,543
♪ And I end up with Aaron
When she's gone ♪
964
00:49:13,543 --> 00:49:15,743
♪ Yes, bitch! ♪
965
00:49:17,318 --> 00:49:19,681
I end up with Aaron
when she's gone.
966
00:49:20,288 --> 00:49:21,617
Yes, bitch.
967
00:49:31,167 --> 00:49:32,562
I think I need a tutor.
968
00:49:32,562 --> 00:49:34,828
I could tutor you,
if you want.
969
00:49:36,337 --> 00:49:38,403
♪ What's Regina doin'? ♪
970
00:49:38,403 --> 00:49:39,800
♪ What's Regina wearin'? ♪
971
00:49:39,800 --> 00:49:42,044
♪ Is she back with Aaron? ♪
972
00:49:42,044 --> 00:49:45,806
♪ Regina! Regina!
She has everything
She gets everything ♪
973
00:49:47,447 --> 00:49:49,249
♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪
974
00:49:50,252 --> 00:49:51,449
What is that?
975
00:49:51,449 --> 00:49:53,121
Ugh, I'm so fat
and disgusting.
976
00:49:53,121 --> 00:49:54,452
I'm not having anything
977
00:49:54,452 --> 00:49:56,256
but Kälteen bars
until I lose weight.
978
00:49:56,256 --> 00:49:57,818
Well, I need
to lose three pounds.
979
00:49:57,818 --> 00:49:58,984
How many calories from fat?
980
00:49:58,984 --> 00:50:00,260
Zero.
981
00:50:00,260 --> 00:50:02,097
You cross-multiply x
over a thousand
982
00:50:02,097 --> 00:50:03,923
and divide it by 0.5
because it's in kilograms.
983
00:50:03,923 --> 00:50:06,497
Whatever.
Bring me a whole box.
984
00:50:06,497 --> 00:50:08,664
No, um, bring me two.
985
00:50:15,706 --> 00:50:18,971
♪ A revenge party
A party that ends ♪
986
00:50:18,971 --> 00:50:21,776
♪ With somebody crushed
And alone ♪♪ And ugly-crying! ♪
987
00:50:21,776 --> 00:50:24,977
♪ A revenge party
With your two best friends ♪
988
00:50:24,977 --> 00:50:27,485
♪ It's like a party
With revenge
Is what we're throwin'! ♪
989
00:50:44,337 --> 00:50:46,306
♪ What's Regina eating? ♪
990
00:50:46,306 --> 00:50:48,077
♪ God, look at her figure ♪
991
00:50:48,077 --> 00:50:50,838
♪ Did her boobs get bigger?
Regina! Regina! ♪
992
00:50:50,838 --> 00:50:52,642
♪ She has everything! ♪
993
00:50:52,642 --> 00:50:54,842
♪ She gets everything! ♪
994
00:50:54,842 --> 00:50:57,383
♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪
995
00:51:01,422 --> 00:51:04,357
Six weeks and all we've done
is make Regina hotter
and revive the wet look.
996
00:51:04,357 --> 00:51:06,293
We have to pivot.
997
00:51:06,293 --> 00:51:08,889
If we can make
Gretchen Wieners think
that Regina is mad at her...
998
00:51:08,889 --> 00:51:10,792
No, no, no.
Gretchen is fragile.
999
00:51:10,792 --> 00:51:12,728
Exactly!
1000
00:51:12,728 --> 00:51:14,532
If we crack her open,
maybe she'll spill
something we can use.
1001
00:51:22,410 --> 00:51:24,377
♪ Party ♪
1002
00:51:24,377 --> 00:51:26,907
Hey, girl, you sending
any candy canes this year?
1003
00:51:26,907 --> 00:51:29,877
Oh.
I don't send them.
I just get them.
1004
00:51:31,419 --> 00:51:33,914
Um, stop pulling it down.
1005
00:51:33,914 --> 00:51:36,092
Your hair looks so sexy
pushed back.
1006
00:51:37,161 --> 00:51:38,886
Cady, would you
please tell him
1007
00:51:38,886 --> 00:51:40,987
that his hair looks sexy
pushed back?
1008
00:51:42,628 --> 00:51:44,661
Your hair looks sexy
pushed back.
1009
00:51:44,661 --> 00:51:45,728
Oh...
1010
00:51:51,307 --> 00:51:52,372
Thanks.
1011
00:51:56,312 --> 00:51:58,345
I'll, uh, see you in Calc.
1012
00:52:00,448 --> 00:52:03,185
♪ At every party
There might be a low ♪
1013
00:52:03,185 --> 00:52:06,782
♪ Where the energy dips ♪
♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪
1014
00:52:06,782 --> 00:52:13,690
♪ You might be thinking
"It's late, we should go
And they ran out of chips" ♪
1015
00:52:13,690 --> 00:52:17,463
♪ No! I can't even watch
When she touches his hair ♪
1016
00:52:17,463 --> 00:52:20,169
♪ And I've watched a snake
Eat a cow ♪
1017
00:52:20,169 --> 00:52:23,799
♪ Regina needs to be toppled
Sorry, Gretchen, I swear ♪
1018
00:52:23,799 --> 00:52:26,934
♪ We'll get our party now! ♪
1019
00:52:26,934 --> 00:52:29,002
One candy cane, please!
1020
00:52:31,479 --> 00:52:34,909
♪ A revenge party
A party that ends ♪
1021
00:52:34,909 --> 00:52:37,109
♪ With lions in a Roman arena ♪
1022
00:52:37,109 --> 00:52:39,947
♪ She has everything!
She gets everything! ♪
1023
00:52:41,291 --> 00:52:43,082
♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪
1024
00:52:43,082 --> 00:52:44,853
Ho, ho, ho!
1025
00:52:44,853 --> 00:52:47,119
Candy Cane Gram
for Shane Oman!
1026
00:52:47,119 --> 00:52:48,560
♪ She has everything! ♪
1027
00:52:48,560 --> 00:52:50,628
And one for Cady Heron.
1028
00:52:50,628 --> 00:52:51,992
♪ She gets everything! ♪
1029
00:52:51,992 --> 00:52:54,060
Four for Glenn Cocco?
1030
00:52:54,060 --> 00:52:55,963
You go, Glenn Cocco!
1031
00:52:55,963 --> 00:52:57,998
♪ Glenn Cocco!
Glenn Cocco! Glenn Cocco! ♪
1032
00:52:59,309 --> 00:53:02,970
And... none
for Gretchen Wieners, bye.
1033
00:53:03,709 --> 00:53:04,807
Who sent that?
1034
00:53:04,807 --> 00:53:06,105
Oh, it's from...
1035
00:53:06,105 --> 00:53:08,250
♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪
1036
00:53:08,250 --> 00:53:11,517
"Thanks for being
such a great best friend."
1037
00:53:11,517 --> 00:53:12,518
Aw.
1038
00:53:13,389 --> 00:53:14,652
Oh.
1039
00:53:15,820 --> 00:53:16,885
Okay.
1040
00:53:18,361 --> 00:53:20,229
If you and Regina are
"best friends" now,
1041
00:53:20,229 --> 00:53:23,122
then you can be in charge of
keeping all her secrets, okay?
1042
00:53:23,122 --> 00:53:26,158
For example, she gave you
those high-heel shoes
just to make fun of you
1043
00:53:26,158 --> 00:53:29,238
because she knew
you wouldn't be able
to walk in them. Sorry!
1044
00:53:29,238 --> 00:53:32,098
Also, she says
she has a nose job,
1045
00:53:32,098 --> 00:53:33,671
but that's just to distract
from the fact
1046
00:53:33,671 --> 00:53:36,168
that she had one
of her ears moved!
1047
00:53:36,168 --> 00:53:38,874
Also, she totally cheats
on Aaron.
1048
00:53:38,874 --> 00:53:41,844
Yeah. Every Tuesday,
she says she has College Prep,
1049
00:53:41,844 --> 00:53:43,516
but really she's hooking up
with Shane Oman
1050
00:53:43,516 --> 00:53:45,353
in the third-floor
janitorial closet
1051
00:53:45,353 --> 00:53:48,180
on the bags of sawdust
that they use for barf!
1052
00:53:48,180 --> 00:53:50,358
And I never told anyone
1053
00:53:50,358 --> 00:53:52,558
because I'm such
a good friend!
1054
00:53:54,527 --> 00:53:57,398
And I'm only telling you
because you're such
a good friend.
1055
00:54:04,231 --> 00:54:06,099
♪ It's a revenge party ♪
1056
00:54:06,099 --> 00:54:07,837
♪ A party that ends ♪
1057
00:54:07,837 --> 00:54:10,543
♪ With somebody's head
On a spike! ♪
1058
00:54:10,543 --> 00:54:13,579
♪ A revenge party
With your two best friends ♪
1059
00:54:13,579 --> 00:54:17,286
♪ It's like a party
With revenge
Is what it's like ♪
1060
00:54:36,263 --> 00:54:38,340
♪ A party with revenge
Is what it's like ♪
1061
00:54:39,541 --> 00:54:42,674
♪ A party with revenge ♪
1062
00:54:42,674 --> 00:54:46,777
♪ With revenge ♪
1063
00:54:46,777 --> 00:54:48,108
♪ Is what it's like! ♪
1064
00:55:00,826 --> 00:55:03,728
Hey, do you have time to go
over derivatives for a minute?
1065
00:55:04,467 --> 00:55:06,632
Oh, um... no, not today.
1066
00:55:09,296 --> 00:55:10,339
Cady?
1067
00:55:12,640 --> 00:55:14,475
Um...
1068
00:55:14,475 --> 00:55:16,807
You've failed
your last five quizzes.
Is everything okay?
1069
00:55:16,807 --> 00:55:19,447
I'm... I'm sorry.
I'll just try harder.
1070
00:55:19,447 --> 00:55:21,240
Okay, because
if you need extra help,
1071
00:55:21,240 --> 00:55:23,308
there's a Mathletes meeting
starting in a couple minutes.
1072
00:55:23,308 --> 00:55:25,651
I can't. I'm sorry.
I have to go
to my friend Regina's house.
1073
00:55:25,651 --> 00:55:27,719
We're doing a dance
in the talent show.
1074
00:55:27,719 --> 00:55:30,117
"Rockin' Around
the Pole"?
Yeah, how did you know?
1075
00:55:30,117 --> 00:55:32,086
They do it every year.
It's like a...
1076
00:55:32,086 --> 00:55:33,824
Tradition?
Recurring nightmare.
1077
00:55:35,025 --> 00:55:37,597
Okay, I could probably
get Kevin to tutor you.
1078
00:55:37,597 --> 00:55:39,533
Well, Aaron's tutoring me now,
so...
1079
00:55:39,533 --> 00:55:42,261
Oh, he's tutoring you?
Sure, okay, well,
1080
00:55:42,261 --> 00:55:44,637
let Aaron know that the weird
thing with your quizzes
1081
00:55:44,637 --> 00:55:47,838
is that all the work is right
and only the answers are wrong.
1082
00:55:47,838 --> 00:55:50,236
Huh.
Huh.
1083
00:55:50,236 --> 00:55:53,206
Cady, I am not gonna
stop pushing you,
because I'm a pusher.
1084
00:55:53,206 --> 00:55:55,450
And I know you're smarter
than this.
1085
00:55:55,450 --> 00:55:59,817
Maybe I should just push
your seat away from Aaron's.
1086
00:55:59,817 --> 00:56:02,787
Ugh! And she was like,
"I'm a pusher, Cady.
I'm a pusher."
1087
00:56:02,787 --> 00:56:05,152
Wait, what does she even mean,
she's a "pusher"?
1088
00:56:05,152 --> 00:56:09,629
Like a drug pusher?
I don't know.
She's so weird.
1089
00:56:09,629 --> 00:56:12,434
Let it all out, honey.
Put it in the book.
1090
00:56:15,164 --> 00:56:17,329
Look at this thing!
1091
00:56:18,838 --> 00:56:21,938
I can't even see it.
It's sexy,
like a face breast.
1092
00:56:21,938 --> 00:56:25,513
It happens to me, too.
It's just the Kälteen bars
flushing your toxins.
1093
00:56:25,513 --> 00:56:27,009
Huh. Okay.
1094
00:56:27,009 --> 00:56:29,077
Well, this skin stuff
you gave me sucks!
1095
00:56:29,717 --> 00:56:31,046
Where did you get it?
1096
00:56:40,497 --> 00:56:41,694
The Paris airport.
1097
00:56:41,694 --> 00:56:43,025
Oh, "the Paris airport."
1098
00:56:43,025 --> 00:56:44,895
Well, it's garbage.
And so are you.
1099
00:56:47,735 --> 00:56:50,329
She's just grouchy
because Aaron
broke up with her.
1100
00:56:50,329 --> 00:56:51,869
He did?
1101
00:56:51,869 --> 00:56:53,442
Someone told him
about Shane.
1102
00:56:54,335 --> 00:56:56,005
Do you think it was Santa?
1103
00:56:57,107 --> 00:56:59,074
Oh...
1104
00:56:59,074 --> 00:57:01,879
Also,
all that she's been eating
are those Kälteen bars,
1105
00:57:01,879 --> 00:57:04,013
and I don't think she's pooped
in, like, two weeks.
1106
00:57:04,013 --> 00:57:05,652
Uh...
1107
00:57:05,652 --> 00:57:07,522
Hey, G, we've practiced
a bunch with Cady.
1108
00:57:07,522 --> 00:57:08,721
You want to run it once?
1109
00:57:08,721 --> 00:57:10,855
Why? I'm perfect every year.
1110
00:57:10,855 --> 00:57:12,318
Mm-hmm.
1111
00:57:12,318 --> 00:57:14,529
Yeah, but it's,
uh, Cady's first time
1112
00:57:14,529 --> 00:57:16,531
and there's a bunch
of traffic patterns...
1113
00:57:16,531 --> 00:57:19,391
Stop playing with
that stupid babyish book!
1114
00:58:04,339 --> 00:58:06,548
Uh, that was
Damian Hubbard singing...
1115
00:58:06,548 --> 00:58:09,045
...the iCarly theme song
1116
00:58:09,045 --> 00:58:10,684
in French for extra credit.
1117
00:58:10,684 --> 00:58:11,784
Yeah!
1118
00:58:13,414 --> 00:58:15,854
Our next act describes
their music
1119
00:58:15,854 --> 00:58:19,253
as "Like a sine wave,
they don't stop."
1120
00:58:19,253 --> 00:58:22,696
Please welcome Kevin G
and the Power of Three.
1121
00:58:22,696 --> 00:58:24,929
Uh. Yeah.
1122
00:58:24,929 --> 00:58:27,195
♪ All you ♪
1123
00:58:27,195 --> 00:58:29,362
♪ Suckah emcees
Ain't got nothin' on me ♪
1124
00:58:29,362 --> 00:58:31,672
♪ From my grades to my rhymes
You can't touch Kevin G ♪
1125
00:58:31,672 --> 00:58:32,937
♪ I'm a Mathlete ♪
1126
00:58:32,937 --> 00:58:34,906
♪ So good under pressure ♪
1127
00:58:34,906 --> 00:58:36,743
♪ I'ma find acute angles
To prioritize your pleasure ♪
1128
00:58:36,743 --> 00:58:39,108
♪ I'm a Model UN rep
Out in these streets ♪
1129
00:58:39,108 --> 00:58:41,341
♪ But I'm a overachiever
Under the sheets ♪
1130
00:58:41,341 --> 00:58:43,981
♪ She be like
"Uhhhh, Kevin G!" ♪
1131
00:58:43,981 --> 00:58:45,477
Inappropriate.
1132
00:58:45,477 --> 00:58:46,984
Kevin, we talked about this.
1133
00:58:46,984 --> 00:58:49,481
Well,
happy holidays, everybody.
1134
00:58:51,659 --> 00:58:54,189
Why is this so tight?
1135
00:58:54,189 --> 00:58:55,960
You've had it
since the sixth grade.
1136
00:58:55,960 --> 00:58:57,995
You're probably maturing.
1137
00:58:57,995 --> 00:59:00,833
Um, do you just,
like, want to run it one time
real quick?
1138
00:59:00,833 --> 00:59:04,166
Gretchen,
literally no one cares.
1139
00:59:04,166 --> 00:59:06,300
Mm-hmm. No, totally.
1140
00:59:06,300 --> 00:59:08,533
Um, do you just want
to run the acro?
1141
00:59:08,533 --> 00:59:10,711
Because none of us really does
gymnastics anymore
1142
00:59:10,711 --> 00:59:12,944
and when we made up this dance,
we all weighed, like, 70 pounds,
1143
00:59:12,944 --> 00:59:16,145
so maybe we should
just make sure everyone's
center of gravity is still...
1144
00:59:16,145 --> 00:59:17,311
Still what?
1145
00:59:18,545 --> 00:59:19,588
Nothing.
1146
00:59:26,892 --> 00:59:30,665
Thank you,
Shelby and Timmy, for tapping.
1147
00:59:30,665 --> 00:59:32,667
Also, if anyone finds
a retainer
1148
00:59:32,667 --> 00:59:35,967
in a bright aqua case,
that is mine.
1149
00:59:35,967 --> 00:59:37,463
Please return it.
1150
00:59:37,463 --> 00:59:39,575
My insurance won't cover
a replacement.
1151
00:59:40,875 --> 00:59:42,710
Karen, I can see your bra.
1152
00:59:42,710 --> 00:59:44,613
It's on purpose.
I'm going for a look.
1153
00:59:44,613 --> 00:59:46,472
Is it "girl
who slept with 11 people"?
1154
00:59:46,472 --> 00:59:47,682
'Cause you're nailing it.
1155
00:59:49,543 --> 00:59:52,511
I think your top is fetch.
Gretchen!
1156
00:59:52,511 --> 00:59:54,546
Stop trying
to make "fetch" happen.
1157
00:59:54,546 --> 00:59:57,417
It's not going to happen.
1158
01:00:01,126 --> 01:00:03,863
Okay,
please welcome Santa's Helpers
1159
01:00:03,863 --> 01:00:05,832
doing "Rockin'
Around the Pole."
1160
01:00:15,778 --> 01:00:18,174
♪ We're gonna
Take a Christmas train ♪
1161
01:00:18,174 --> 01:00:20,242
♪ To where Santa lives ♪
1162
01:00:20,242 --> 01:00:23,311
♪ Up through the sleet
And snow ♪
1163
01:00:23,311 --> 01:00:26,721
♪ Then we'll hop and bop
Straight to the top ♪
1164
01:00:26,721 --> 01:00:29,416
♪ Last stop the North Pole ♪
1165
01:00:31,420 --> 01:00:34,960
♪ And we'll be rock, rock
Rockin' around the pole ♪
1166
01:00:34,960 --> 01:00:37,963
♪ Where the northern lights
Are bright ♪
1167
01:00:37,963 --> 01:00:41,670
♪ Rock, rock, rockin'
Around the pole ♪
1168
01:00:41,670 --> 01:00:44,805
♪ We'll rock that pole
All night ♪
1169
01:00:44,805 --> 01:00:48,006
♪ And we'll be sing, sing
Singin' a Christmas tune ♪
1170
01:00:48,006 --> 01:00:49,568
Thank you, next!
1171
01:00:51,275 --> 01:00:55,013
♪ Yeah, we'll be rock
Rock, rockin' up on that pole ♪
1172
01:00:55,013 --> 01:00:57,983
♪ Rockin' till the break
Of day ♪
1173
01:00:57,983 --> 01:01:01,019
♪ Yeah, we'll be rockin'
Stuffin' a stockin' ♪
1174
01:01:01,019 --> 01:01:04,187
♪ And they'll be talkin'
About us in town ♪
1175
01:01:04,187 --> 01:01:06,453
♪ Yeah, we'll be rockin' ♪
1176
01:01:06,453 --> 01:01:08,323
♪ And rollin' and lockin'
And strollin' ♪
1177
01:01:08,323 --> 01:01:11,964
♪ Till the North Pole police
Come shut us down ♪
1178
01:01:33,678 --> 01:01:36,824
So, I went
to the Christmas show
and it was a mess, y'all.
1179
01:01:36,824 --> 01:01:38,650
Regina ate total shit.
1180
01:01:38,650 --> 01:01:40,355
I think people saw her nipple.
1181
01:01:40,355 --> 01:01:41,686
It's just unprofessional.
1182
01:01:41,686 --> 01:01:43,292
This was kind of hilarious.
1183
01:01:45,459 --> 01:01:47,131
I've watched
1184
01:01:47,131 --> 01:01:50,530
this video a thousand times.
Gretchen piledrived Regina.
1185
01:01:50,530 --> 01:01:52,202
Regina really should be
lifting through her glutes.
1186
01:01:52,202 --> 01:01:54,270
Regina challenge!
1187
01:01:54,270 --> 01:01:55,876
You know
what that bitch gets?
1188
01:01:55,876 --> 01:01:57,273
Not my sympathy.
1189
01:01:57,273 --> 01:01:58,703
It's not like
we like Regina anyway.
1190
01:01:58,703 --> 01:02:00,606
She's such a bitch.
She's so spoiled.
1191
01:02:00,606 --> 01:02:02,850
Regina always wanted
to be the center of attention.
1192
01:02:02,850 --> 01:02:05,050
Girl, we all see you.
1193
01:02:05,050 --> 01:02:07,118
Regina got what she deserves.
1194
01:02:07,118 --> 01:02:08,955
But you know, that Cady girl
was kind of cute.
1195
01:02:08,955 --> 01:02:10,022
You know, she stayed,
she waved.
1196
01:02:10,022 --> 01:02:12,387
She ate, like, house down.
1197
01:02:12,387 --> 01:02:14,257
Cady Heron was the only one
that acted normal.
1198
01:02:14,257 --> 01:02:15,830
- Oh, yeah.- I think she salvaged
1199
01:02:15,830 --> 01:02:17,524
the worst tradition
of the year.
1200
01:02:17,524 --> 01:02:19,493
Period.
She was... She's kind of hot.
1201
01:02:19,493 --> 01:02:21,495
She might even be hotter
than Regina George.
1202
01:02:21,495 --> 01:02:24,366
No zits. Gum health.
American Eagle.
1203
01:02:24,366 --> 01:02:26,005
Cady doesn't even have
to wear deodorant.
1204
01:02:26,005 --> 01:02:27,567
I'm thinking of going red.
1205
01:02:27,567 --> 01:02:29,041
Okay, so, somebody sent me
this look, and I was like,
1206
01:02:29,041 --> 01:02:31,010
"Hot girls,
we are going back to red!
1207
01:02:31,010 --> 01:02:32,814
Y2K fire-crotch is back!"
1208
01:02:32,814 --> 01:02:34,640
Thank you, Cady Heron.
1209
01:02:34,640 --> 01:02:36,312
Cady was looking good.
1210
01:02:37,821 --> 01:02:39,117
Caddy!
1211
01:02:40,087 --> 01:02:41,746
Did you hear me?
1212
01:02:41,746 --> 01:02:44,320
What?
We did it.
1213
01:02:44,320 --> 01:02:45,750
Regina lost
her hot boyfriend.
1214
01:02:45,750 --> 01:02:47,224
She lost her status
over everyone.
1215
01:02:47,224 --> 01:02:48,863
She popped her blemish
against the stage floor.
1216
01:02:48,863 --> 01:02:50,194
That's rock bottom.
1217
01:02:51,098 --> 01:02:53,230
We can stop. We're even.
1218
01:02:53,230 --> 01:02:55,100
Finally you don't have
to talk to them anymore.
1219
01:02:55,100 --> 01:02:57,399
We can finally
have lunch together tomorrow.
1220
01:02:57,399 --> 01:02:58,972
I'm getting dumplings.
1221
01:02:58,972 --> 01:03:00,809
Unless they have pizza bagels,
then I might get both.
1222
01:03:00,809 --> 01:03:02,437
So good.
I can't.
1223
01:03:04,672 --> 01:03:06,573
I need one more lunch.
1224
01:03:30,302 --> 01:03:33,006
I'm sorry, Regina.
You can't sit with us.
1225
01:03:35,274 --> 01:03:36,768
What?
1226
01:03:38,013 --> 01:03:40,640
You're wearing sweatpants.
It's Thursday.
1227
01:03:41,676 --> 01:03:43,445
Whatever.
Those rules aren't real.
1228
01:03:43,445 --> 01:03:44,985
They were real
that day I wore a vest.
1229
01:03:44,985 --> 01:03:46,613
Yeah, because that vest
was disgusting!
1230
01:03:46,613 --> 01:03:49,055
You can't sit with us!
1231
01:04:01,861 --> 01:04:04,235
These sweatpants
are all that fit me right now.
1232
01:04:07,702 --> 01:04:08,943
What do you think, Cady?
1233
01:04:15,985 --> 01:04:19,712
Sorry, Regina.
Rules are rules.
1234
01:04:21,782 --> 01:04:22,814
Fine.
1235
01:04:25,192 --> 01:04:28,061
Oh.
1236
01:04:30,395 --> 01:04:32,362
Take a picture, losers.
It'll last longer.
1237
01:04:41,010 --> 01:04:42,735
And that...
...was the beginning...
1238
01:04:42,735 --> 01:04:43,670
...of the...
...mother******á
1239
01:04:43,670 --> 01:04:45,210
...end.
1240
01:04:48,842 --> 01:04:50,380
Hello,
may I have your attention
1241
01:04:50,380 --> 01:04:51,887
for this morning's
announcements?
1242
01:04:53,385 --> 01:04:55,088
In honor
of Women's History Month,
1243
01:04:55,088 --> 01:04:58,685
the cafeteria is offering
vegan "Confident Joannes"
1244
01:04:58,685 --> 01:05:01,193
which are Sloppy Joes
made of beans.
1245
01:05:03,395 --> 01:05:05,230
Secondly, we want
to wish good luck
1246
01:05:05,230 --> 01:05:07,628
to junior, Janis 'Imi'ike...
1247
01:05:07,628 --> 01:05:09,069
...who is a finalist
1248
01:05:09,069 --> 01:05:11,632
in the Illinois Art Expo
this Saturday.
1249
01:05:11,632 --> 01:05:14,140
Go, Lions! Even for Art.
1250
01:05:14,140 --> 01:05:15,900
Art, art, art!
Next up,
1251
01:05:15,900 --> 01:05:18,342
the Students Activities
Committee voted,
1252
01:05:18,342 --> 01:05:20,113
and the theme for
this year's Spring Fling...
1253
01:05:20,113 --> 01:05:22,643
What's that lip color?
Oh, it's e.l.f. O Face in...
1254
01:05:22,643 --> 01:05:24,084
No, amazing, yeah.
1255
01:05:24,084 --> 01:05:25,811
I was just making sure
your ears still worked.
1256
01:05:25,811 --> 01:05:30,453
And finally, the nominees for
Spring Fling King and Queen
1257
01:05:30,453 --> 01:05:31,883
are as follows:
1258
01:05:31,883 --> 01:05:34,028
For King, Aaron Samuels,
1259
01:05:34,028 --> 01:05:37,031
Christian Wiggins
and Shane Oman.
1260
01:05:37,031 --> 01:05:39,066
And Damian Hubbard. What?
1261
01:05:40,102 --> 01:05:41,530
For Queen...
1262
01:05:41,530 --> 01:05:43,004
...Regina George...
1263
01:05:43,004 --> 01:05:45,567
...Karen Shetty
and Gretchen Wieners.
1264
01:05:45,567 --> 01:05:47,800
Same old, same old.
And Caddy Heron.
1265
01:05:50,772 --> 01:05:52,079
Wow.
1266
01:05:52,079 --> 01:05:53,014
Wait, my mistake.
1267
01:05:55,645 --> 01:05:56,985
Cady Heron.
1268
01:06:01,255 --> 01:06:02,716
Oh, my God.
1269
01:06:02,716 --> 01:06:06,126
Oh, my God,
so many people are texting me.
1270
01:06:06,126 --> 01:06:08,755
Should I, um, text Aaron
and congratulate him?
1271
01:06:08,755 --> 01:06:10,064
No.
1272
01:06:10,064 --> 01:06:11,890
Hey, do you want a lift
this weekend?
1273
01:06:11,890 --> 01:06:13,958
'Cause Damian's borrowing
his grandma's Jazzy.
1274
01:06:13,958 --> 01:06:15,498
A lift to what?
1275
01:06:17,040 --> 01:06:19,601
My art show.
Didn't you just hear
Mr. Duvall talking about it?
1276
01:06:19,601 --> 01:06:22,439
Oh, that's this weekend?
Yeah.
1277
01:06:22,439 --> 01:06:26,377
Oh, shoot.
I have tickets to this thing
in Madison with my mom.
1278
01:06:26,377 --> 01:06:27,609
Uh, I'm sorry.
1279
01:06:29,646 --> 01:06:32,416
Yeah, you seem
super sad about it.
1280
01:06:35,023 --> 01:06:37,322
So, what are we doing
this weekend?
1281
01:06:37,322 --> 01:06:39,126
Why is everyone asking me
about the weekend?
1282
01:06:39,126 --> 01:06:40,589
It's Tuesday.
1283
01:06:40,589 --> 01:06:44,164
Yeah, the weekend is only...
several days away.
1284
01:06:44,164 --> 01:06:46,529
I have to go to this thing
in Madison with my mom.
1285
01:06:46,529 --> 01:06:48,333
Your mom is going away?
You should have people over.
1286
01:06:48,333 --> 01:06:50,104
No, I'm going with her.
1287
01:06:50,104 --> 01:06:53,140
Well, if you have people over,
you can invite Aaron.
1288
01:06:56,508 --> 01:06:58,079
Huh.
1289
01:06:58,079 --> 01:06:59,773
Yeah, I guess
I could get out of it.
1290
01:06:59,773 --> 01:07:01,940
But, like,
1291
01:07:01,940 --> 01:07:05,317
we would keep it small, right?
Like five or six people?
1292
01:07:05,317 --> 01:07:06,780
Yes!
Sure!
1293
01:07:06,780 --> 01:07:09,387
Why are you doing this to me?!
1294
01:07:09,387 --> 01:07:12,324
I promised my friend Janis
I'd go to her art show!
1295
01:07:12,324 --> 01:07:14,689
But, binti, we've had
these tickets for months.
1296
01:07:14,689 --> 01:07:16,196
You love Neil deGrasse Tyson.
1297
01:07:16,196 --> 01:07:17,329
Mom!
1298
01:07:17,329 --> 01:07:19,760
Janis is my best friend!
1299
01:07:19,760 --> 01:07:21,564
Do you not want me
to be a good friend?!
1300
01:07:21,564 --> 01:07:23,027
No! Yes! What?
1301
01:07:23,027 --> 01:07:27,174
You can, uh, stay home
on your own, I guess.
1302
01:07:27,174 --> 01:07:29,506
Hey. I'm having
a small get-together
1303
01:07:29,506 --> 01:07:32,641
at my house tomorrow night.
My mom's away, so...
1304
01:07:32,641 --> 01:07:33,972
Is Regina going?
1305
01:07:33,972 --> 01:07:36,612
No! Do you think
I'm an idiot? No.
1306
01:07:36,612 --> 01:07:38,647
It's just gonna be
a few cool people,
1307
01:07:38,647 --> 01:07:40,385
and you better be
one of them, byotch.
1308
01:07:41,553 --> 01:07:43,421
Okay. I'll be there.
1309
01:08:01,540 --> 01:08:02,935
No, no, no!
1310
01:08:14,487 --> 01:08:16,322
Have you seen Aaron?
1311
01:08:16,322 --> 01:08:18,082
What?
Aaron!
1312
01:08:18,082 --> 01:08:19,622
Karen?
1313
01:08:20,856 --> 01:08:21,888
Hi.
1314
01:08:26,268 --> 01:08:28,235
Whoo!
1315
01:08:35,506 --> 01:08:37,035
I've been looking for you.
1316
01:08:37,873 --> 01:08:39,477
Me as well.
1317
01:08:39,477 --> 01:08:42,315
I like your costume.
I mean, um, your dress.
1318
01:08:43,714 --> 01:08:45,582
Is this you holding
a crocodile?
1319
01:08:45,582 --> 01:08:48,453
Oh, my God,
don't look at that.
That is so embarrassing.
1320
01:08:48,453 --> 01:08:50,818
No, it's not. It's awesome.
1321
01:08:51,788 --> 01:08:53,084
You miss Kenya?
1322
01:08:53,084 --> 01:08:54,393
Yes.
1323
01:08:54,393 --> 01:08:55,988
No. I mean, I...
1324
01:08:57,090 --> 01:08:58,958
Well, I miss...
1325
01:08:58,958 --> 01:09:01,400
I could see
a lot more sky there.
1326
01:09:01,400 --> 01:09:02,797
At night.
1327
01:09:02,797 --> 01:09:05,833
My mom and I used
to map the constellations.
1328
01:09:06,638 --> 01:09:08,000
The stars.
1329
01:09:16,978 --> 01:09:18,780
You still on
the treadmill, honey?
1330
01:09:18,780 --> 01:09:20,452
No, I'm over there.
1331
01:09:21,818 --> 01:09:25,193
You got any plans tonight?
It's Saturday.
1332
01:09:25,193 --> 01:09:27,657
Mom, don't bother me.
1333
01:09:27,657 --> 01:09:30,924
I know you're not
feeling your best
about your body right now,
1334
01:09:30,924 --> 01:09:35,060
but remember that real beauty
comes from the face.
1335
01:09:35,060 --> 01:09:38,701
Don't ever talk about my body!
1336
01:09:38,701 --> 01:09:40,703
Okay, okay.
1337
01:09:44,346 --> 01:09:47,875
Wait, honey, why are
you eating Kälteen bars?
1338
01:09:47,875 --> 01:09:50,251
These are what
we gave Nana Joan
1339
01:09:50,251 --> 01:09:51,912
when we needed her
to gain weight.
1340
01:10:15,740 --> 01:10:17,674
I am drinking
1341
01:10:17,674 --> 01:10:19,742
not juice tonight.
1342
01:10:19,742 --> 01:10:21,612
I know. I can tell.
1343
01:10:22,549 --> 01:10:23,812
We should go downstairs.
1344
01:10:23,812 --> 01:10:26,386
No, no, no, sit down.
I'm amazing.
1345
01:10:32,889 --> 01:10:36,220
I think you should wear
your hair however you want.
1346
01:10:36,220 --> 01:10:38,893
I think it looks good
both ways.
1347
01:10:42,666 --> 01:10:45,636
Thank you
for inviting me tonight.
1348
01:10:45,636 --> 01:10:48,507
I think
I've spent too much time
being pissed at Regina.
1349
01:10:48,507 --> 01:10:50,069
Yeah, you really have.
1350
01:10:50,069 --> 01:10:53,072
No more liars.
I would never lie to you.
1351
01:10:54,680 --> 01:10:57,010
I mean,
I did lie to you once.
1352
01:10:57,010 --> 01:10:59,551
But you are totally
gonna laugh when I tell you.
1353
01:10:59,551 --> 01:11:00,981
Tell me what?
1354
01:11:00,981 --> 01:11:02,884
We're in here!
1355
01:11:08,188 --> 01:11:11,255
I pretended
to be bad at math
1356
01:11:11,255 --> 01:11:13,895
to get you to help me,
but I'm not bad at math.
1357
01:11:13,895 --> 01:11:16,568
I'm actually... I'm actually
really good at math.
1358
01:11:16,568 --> 01:11:20,473
You're the one who's only
kind of okay at math.
1359
01:11:20,473 --> 01:11:22,772
Anyways, um,
now I'm failing.
1360
01:11:22,772 --> 01:11:26,776
So isn't that so dumb?
That is dumb, yeah.
1361
01:11:27,911 --> 01:11:29,449
Why wouldn't you
just talk to me?
1362
01:11:29,449 --> 01:11:31,418
Because of Regina.
'Cause you were her property.
1363
01:11:31,418 --> 01:11:33,453
Her property?
Shut up. Not her property.
1364
01:11:33,453 --> 01:11:34,751
Don't tell me to shut up.
1365
01:11:36,425 --> 01:11:38,788
What? Aaron, sit down.
1366
01:11:38,788 --> 01:11:40,592
You are a clone of Regina.
1367
01:11:43,399 --> 01:11:45,025
No. No, no, no!
1368
01:11:45,025 --> 01:11:47,500
What are you thinking about?
1369
01:11:47,500 --> 01:11:48,765
Chicken wings later.
1370
01:11:48,765 --> 01:11:50,228
Do you ever think about me?
1371
01:11:50,228 --> 01:11:53,000
Sometimes.
When I'm looking right at you.
1372
01:12:01,483 --> 01:12:03,318
Cady, Cady, Cady!
No, no, no.
1373
01:12:07,489 --> 01:12:08,983
Aaron!
1374
01:12:08,983 --> 01:12:11,491
Aaron, wait!
1375
01:12:17,928 --> 01:12:19,763
You dirty little liar.
1376
01:12:20,766 --> 01:12:22,260
I... I can explain.
1377
01:12:22,260 --> 01:12:24,031
Explain how you're supposed
to be out of town
1378
01:12:24,031 --> 01:12:25,472
but there are
60 different people
1379
01:12:25,472 --> 01:12:27,265
posting pictures
from your party?
1380
01:12:27,265 --> 01:12:28,739
You know
I couldn't invite you.
1381
01:12:28,739 --> 01:12:30,642
I... I have to act
like I don't know you.
1382
01:12:30,642 --> 01:12:32,743
You are full of lies!
1383
01:12:32,743 --> 01:12:34,613
Janis, I cannot stop
this Jazzy.
1384
01:12:34,613 --> 01:12:35,845
You know I have a curfew!
1385
01:12:35,845 --> 01:12:37,814
You would hate this party.
1386
01:12:37,814 --> 01:12:39,519
Why? Aren't you having
an amazing time
1387
01:12:39,519 --> 01:12:41,015
with your amazing friends?
1388
01:12:41,015 --> 01:12:42,984
Janis, I can't spend
every minute with you.
1389
01:12:42,984 --> 01:12:45,052
It's not my fault you're like
obsessed with me or something!
1390
01:12:48,123 --> 01:12:51,696
What?
Oh, no, she didn't.
1391
01:12:51,696 --> 01:12:54,127
See, this is the problem
with you Plastics.
1392
01:12:54,127 --> 01:12:56,195
You think everyone
is obsessed with you
1393
01:12:56,195 --> 01:12:58,032
when actually
everybody hates you.
1394
01:12:58,032 --> 01:12:59,968
You made me like this.
1395
01:12:59,968 --> 01:13:02,201
It was your idea for me
to pretend to be Plastic!
1396
01:13:02,201 --> 01:13:03,939
Buddy, it's not pretend!
1397
01:13:03,939 --> 01:13:05,677
♪ You are as plastic
As they come ♪
1398
01:13:05,677 --> 01:13:07,305
♪ You think
Your shit don't stink ♪
1399
01:13:07,305 --> 01:13:08,878
♪ You think
The rest of us are dumb ♪
1400
01:13:08,878 --> 01:13:10,649
♪ I hate Regina's guts ♪
1401
01:13:10,649 --> 01:13:11,947
♪ But here's what
You don't comprehend ♪
1402
01:13:11,947 --> 01:13:13,487
♪ At least she has the guts ♪
1403
01:13:13,487 --> 01:13:15,687
♪ To not pretend
To be my friend! ♪
1404
01:13:17,053 --> 01:13:17,920
Here.
1405
01:13:18,890 --> 01:13:22,122
Have this. It won an award.
Janis.
1406
01:13:22,122 --> 01:13:25,323
♪ No, it's fine ♪
1407
01:13:25,323 --> 01:13:28,392
♪ Really fine ♪
1408
01:13:28,392 --> 01:13:34,299
♪ Go be fine! ♪
1409
01:13:35,509 --> 01:13:37,478
And I want my pink shirt.
1410
01:14:16,079 --> 01:14:20,455
♪ My name is Regina George ♪
1411
01:14:21,557 --> 01:14:26,824
♪ And I am a massive deal ♪
1412
01:14:26,824 --> 01:14:32,665
♪ I will grind you to sand ♪
1413
01:14:32,665 --> 01:14:37,934
♪ Beneath my Louboutin-ed heel ♪
1414
01:14:37,934 --> 01:14:42,708
♪ This is what I get
For helping ♪
1415
01:14:42,708 --> 01:14:47,911
♪ Helping someone lame fit in ♪
1416
01:14:47,911 --> 01:14:50,408
♪ Cady Heron ♪
1417
01:14:50,408 --> 01:14:55,182
♪ Enjoy your temporary win ♪
1418
01:14:58,660 --> 01:15:02,695
♪ My name is Regina George ♪
1419
01:15:03,830 --> 01:15:09,229
♪ "This girl is a fugly cow" ♪
1420
01:15:09,229 --> 01:15:11,671
♪ Hey, Cady ♪
1421
01:15:11,671 --> 01:15:18,777
♪ How you like me now? ♪
1422
01:15:20,308 --> 01:15:22,682
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1423
01:15:22,682 --> 01:15:25,586
♪ I brought the gasoline ♪
1424
01:15:25,586 --> 01:15:27,621
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1425
01:15:27,621 --> 01:15:30,954
♪ And everyone get mean ♪
1426
01:15:30,954 --> 01:15:33,451
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1427
01:15:33,451 --> 01:15:35,662
♪ I got the gasoline ♪
1428
01:15:35,662 --> 01:15:38,192
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1429
01:15:38,192 --> 01:15:41,767
♪ And everyone get ♪
1430
01:15:41,767 --> 01:15:46,035
♪ Mean ♪
1431
01:16:02,482 --> 01:16:05,483
♪ Cady, time to
Watch your back ♪
1432
01:16:05,483 --> 01:16:07,991
♪ Cady, time to turn and cough ♪
1433
01:16:07,991 --> 01:16:10,763
♪ Because you took me down ♪
1434
01:16:10,763 --> 01:16:15,702
♪ But you didn't finish me off ♪
1435
01:16:18,465 --> 01:16:21,070
♪ My name is Regina George ♪
1436
01:16:21,070 --> 01:16:23,677
♪ And in case
You're keeping score ♪
1437
01:16:23,677 --> 01:16:26,042
♪ Cady may have won the battle ♪
1438
01:16:26,042 --> 01:16:28,781
♪ But I will win the war ♪
1439
01:16:30,541 --> 01:16:33,819
I'm just so upset, Mr. Duvall.
1440
01:16:33,819 --> 01:16:35,348
We found it in the hallway.
1441
01:16:35,348 --> 01:16:37,856
I mean, the things
it says about me?
1442
01:16:37,856 --> 01:16:39,385
The things it says
about all of us?
1443
01:16:39,385 --> 01:16:41,222
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1444
01:16:41,222 --> 01:16:43,763
♪ Trang Pham
Is a grotsky byotch! ♪
1445
01:16:45,765 --> 01:16:49,736
"Rachel Hamilton fills
her inhaler with vodka"?
1446
01:16:49,736 --> 01:16:52,068
I mean... does that work?
1447
01:16:54,402 --> 01:16:55,808
♪ I got the gasoline ♪
1448
01:16:55,808 --> 01:16:57,502
♪ Ms. Norbury's ♪
1449
01:16:57,502 --> 01:16:58,943
♪ A drug pusher! ♪
No, no, no. No!
1450
01:16:58,943 --> 01:17:02,078
"Ms. Norbury is a sad,
old drug pusher"?
1451
01:17:03,785 --> 01:17:06,687
"Haley Fralenger has" ...what?
1452
01:17:06,687 --> 01:17:07,952
What's this?
Hairy nips.
1453
01:17:09,657 --> 01:17:11,582
Good Lord.
1454
01:17:11,582 --> 01:17:14,618
♪ Mmm, I want
To make the world burn ♪
1455
01:17:14,618 --> 01:17:17,126
♪ Janis is a pyro-lez! ♪
1456
01:17:17,126 --> 01:17:19,524
Don't you worry.
We're gonna find out
who did this.
1457
01:17:19,524 --> 01:17:22,197
There's only three girls
in the whole school
who aren't in it.
1458
01:17:22,197 --> 01:17:24,936
♪ Regina is a fugly cow! ♪
1459
01:17:24,936 --> 01:17:27,400
♪ Regina is a fugly cow! ♪
1460
01:17:27,400 --> 01:17:29,270
♪ You wrote this ♪
1461
01:17:29,270 --> 01:17:32,636
♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa! ♪
1462
01:17:32,636 --> 01:17:35,144
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1463
01:17:35,144 --> 01:17:37,751
♪ I got the gasoline ♪
1464
01:17:37,751 --> 01:17:40,149
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1465
01:17:40,149 --> 01:17:43,119
♪ And everyone turn ♪
1466
01:17:43,119 --> 01:17:47,761
♪ Mean... Mean ♪
1467
01:17:47,761 --> 01:17:53,261
♪ Mean! ♪
1468
01:17:53,261 --> 01:17:55,461
"Damian Hubbard
is too gay to function"?
1469
01:17:55,461 --> 01:17:57,067
That is only okay
when I say it.
1470
01:17:57,067 --> 01:17:58,497
Only Cady could
have written that.
1471
01:18:03,306 --> 01:18:08,573
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1472
01:18:08,573 --> 01:18:12,786
♪ I want to make
The world turn ♪
1473
01:18:12,786 --> 01:18:18,187
♪ So mean! ♪
1474
01:18:18,187 --> 01:18:20,090
Oh, hell no!
1475
01:18:20,090 --> 01:18:24,028
I did not go
to graduate school for this.
1476
01:18:24,028 --> 01:18:29,264
♪ I want to watch
The world burn! ♪
1477
01:18:29,264 --> 01:18:34,940
All junior girls report
to the gymnasium immediately!
1478
01:18:34,940 --> 01:18:36,568
Immediately!
1479
01:18:49,154 --> 01:18:52,320
Never in my 31 years
as an educator
1480
01:18:52,320 --> 01:18:54,157
have I seen such behavior.
1481
01:18:54,157 --> 01:18:57,259
I have half a mind to cancel
your Spring Fling dance!
1482
01:18:57,259 --> 01:18:59,360
No!
I object.
1483
01:19:01,131 --> 01:19:02,495
But we're not gonna do that
1484
01:19:02,495 --> 01:19:04,200
because we've already paid
the DJ.
1485
01:19:04,200 --> 01:19:08,941
But I am taking
this "Burn Book" seriously.
1486
01:19:08,941 --> 01:19:10,910
Now who has something
to say about this?
1487
01:19:19,580 --> 01:19:20,887
Someone wrote in that book
1488
01:19:20,887 --> 01:19:22,152
that I'm lying
about being a virgin
1489
01:19:22,152 --> 01:19:24,858
because I use
super-jumbo tampons.
1490
01:19:24,858 --> 01:19:27,157
But I can't help it
if I have a heavy flow
1491
01:19:27,157 --> 01:19:28,796
and a wideset vagina.
1492
01:19:28,796 --> 01:19:32,558
Okay. Thank you.
Hold that thought.
1493
01:19:33,792 --> 01:19:36,232
Sharon, you need
to run this.
Oh, come on.
1494
01:19:36,232 --> 01:19:37,871
I need to be able
to tell parents
1495
01:19:37,871 --> 01:19:40,104
that we fixed this,
and honestly,
1496
01:19:40,104 --> 01:19:41,875
you need to prove
whoever called you
1497
01:19:41,875 --> 01:19:45,109
a drug pusher
was just joking.
1498
01:19:45,109 --> 01:19:47,012
Okay, fine,
but you are walking the dogs
1499
01:19:47,012 --> 01:19:49,047
every morning
for the rest of the week.
1500
01:19:49,047 --> 01:19:50,675
Thank you. I love you.
1501
01:19:50,675 --> 01:19:52,248
I love you, too.
1502
01:19:57,618 --> 01:19:58,991
♪ Well ♪
1503
01:19:58,991 --> 01:20:00,652
Excuse me.
1504
01:20:02,227 --> 01:20:05,932
Well, okay, hotshots,
1505
01:20:06,759 --> 01:20:08,264
who wrote all this junk?
1506
01:20:10,939 --> 01:20:11,905
Cady?
1507
01:20:12,831 --> 01:20:14,435
Any ideas?
1508
01:20:16,835 --> 01:20:17,801
No.
1509
01:20:17,801 --> 01:20:19,440
Interesting.
1510
01:20:19,440 --> 01:20:21,145
Um, can I just say,
1511
01:20:21,145 --> 01:20:23,279
I don't think we have a clique
problem at this school?
1512
01:20:23,279 --> 01:20:25,578
And some of us
shouldn't have to participate
1513
01:20:25,578 --> 01:20:27,547
in whatever this is,
1514
01:20:27,547 --> 01:20:29,516
um, just because
of a few bad people.
1515
01:20:29,516 --> 01:20:31,892
"A few bad people."
Mm-hmm.
1516
01:20:31,892 --> 01:20:35,819
Okay.
Well, let's unpack that.
1517
01:20:35,819 --> 01:20:38,129
I want everybody
to close your eyes.
1518
01:20:40,397 --> 01:20:41,792
And I want you
to raise your hand
1519
01:20:41,792 --> 01:20:43,761
if you have ever had
a girl say something bad
1520
01:20:43,761 --> 01:20:45,037
about you behind your back.
1521
01:20:47,008 --> 01:20:49,206
Open your eyes.
1522
01:20:52,310 --> 01:20:54,145
Now close them again.
1523
01:20:54,145 --> 01:20:56,543
This time I want you
to raise your hand
1524
01:20:56,543 --> 01:20:58,578
if you have ever said
something bad
1525
01:20:58,578 --> 01:21:00,316
about a friend
behind her back.
1526
01:21:09,294 --> 01:21:10,788
Open your eyes.
1527
01:21:14,200 --> 01:21:15,463
Hmm.
1528
01:21:15,463 --> 01:21:17,201
Seems like maybe
we could take a break
1529
01:21:17,201 --> 01:21:20,171
from being victims
in this situation
1530
01:21:20,171 --> 01:21:22,008
and start taking
responsibility
1531
01:21:22,008 --> 01:21:23,977
for our own actions.
1532
01:21:23,977 --> 01:21:26,375
Okay, we're gonna write out
some apologies
1533
01:21:26,375 --> 01:21:28,641
to people that we've hurt
in our lives.
1534
01:21:28,641 --> 01:21:30,049
Everybody up.
1535
01:21:32,746 --> 01:21:35,021
I'm gonna kill you.
1536
01:21:35,021 --> 01:21:37,881
'Cause one thing
I know for sure, guys:
1537
01:21:37,881 --> 01:21:41,852
Calling someone "ugly" is not
gonna make you better looking.
1538
01:21:41,852 --> 01:21:45,460
Calling somebody else "stupid"
does not make you any smarter.
1539
01:21:45,460 --> 01:21:48,133
And we as women have
to be able to trust
1540
01:21:48,133 --> 01:21:50,729
and support each other.
1541
01:21:50,729 --> 01:21:51,829
Like this.
1542
01:21:55,536 --> 01:21:57,208
Okay, that was good.
That was really good.
1543
01:21:57,208 --> 01:21:59,540
That could have
really backfired.
1544
01:21:59,540 --> 01:22:01,179
Alyssa,
1545
01:22:01,179 --> 01:22:02,983
I'm sorry I said you look
like you comb your hair
1546
01:22:02,983 --> 01:22:04,050
with a chicken bone.
1547
01:22:05,878 --> 01:22:07,922
I know you're vegetarian.
1548
01:22:11,519 --> 01:22:14,588
Gretchen, I'm sorry I
laughed at you that time
you got diarrhea
1549
01:22:14,588 --> 01:22:16,755
on the Ferris wheel.
1550
01:22:16,755 --> 01:22:18,889
And I'm sorry
for repeating it now.
1551
01:22:18,889 --> 01:22:21,034
And I'm sorry to the people
who were below us.
1552
01:22:24,169 --> 01:22:25,434
Soona,
1553
01:22:25,434 --> 01:22:27,238
I'm sorry I said
you were dragging
1554
01:22:27,238 --> 01:22:29,372
during "Revenge Party."
1555
01:22:29,372 --> 01:22:31,209
There was just, like,
so much pressure on us
1556
01:22:31,209 --> 01:22:33,046
to move the story forward
through montage.
1557
01:22:33,046 --> 01:22:34,146
Like, you know how it is.
1558
01:22:34,146 --> 01:22:36,610
What is going on?
1559
01:22:36,610 --> 01:22:37,941
Don't worry about it.
1560
01:22:37,941 --> 01:22:40,053
I just wish
we could all get along
1561
01:22:40,053 --> 01:22:42,253
like we used to
in elementary school.
1562
01:22:42,253 --> 01:22:44,717
I wish
I could bake a cake
1563
01:22:44,717 --> 01:22:48,094
made out of rainbows
and smiles.
1564
01:22:48,094 --> 01:22:50,690
Then we could all eat it
and be happy.
1565
01:22:50,690 --> 01:22:53,000
She don't even go here!
1566
01:22:54,234 --> 01:22:55,926
Do you go to this school?
1567
01:22:55,926 --> 01:22:58,599
I'm here for a track meet.
1568
01:22:58,599 --> 01:23:00,931
I just have a lot of feelings!
1569
01:23:00,931 --> 01:23:02,966
Okay, sweetheart,
you got to go home.
1570
01:23:02,966 --> 01:23:05,111
Okay.
1571
01:23:05,111 --> 01:23:06,673
Come on, we're gonna...
Oh, thank you.
1572
01:23:06,673 --> 01:23:08,279
...we're gonna call
your grown-up.
1573
01:23:08,974 --> 01:23:10,545
My turn, I guess.
1574
01:23:10,545 --> 01:23:12,514
Watch, this is either gonna be
some really crappy art
1575
01:23:12,514 --> 01:23:13,944
or really good fire.
1576
01:23:21,360 --> 01:23:23,195
Okay, sure.
1577
01:23:23,195 --> 01:23:25,032
I have an apology.
1578
01:23:26,464 --> 01:23:28,464
My friend and I thought
it would be fun
1579
01:23:28,464 --> 01:23:31,335
to mess up
Regina George's life.
1580
01:23:31,335 --> 01:23:33,601
So we got
these candy-bar things
1581
01:23:33,601 --> 01:23:35,273
to make her gain weight...
1582
01:23:35,273 --> 01:23:38,111
...and we told her lard
was face cream.
1583
01:23:39,475 --> 01:23:42,544
And we turned her best friends
against her.
1584
01:23:43,547 --> 01:23:45,283
And then my friend Cady...
1585
01:23:45,283 --> 01:23:47,846
Yeah, you all know
my friend Cady.
1586
01:23:47,846 --> 01:23:52,950
She got Regina's boyfriend
to dump her!
1587
01:23:52,950 --> 01:23:54,655
Oh!
1588
01:23:54,655 --> 01:23:56,019
And it turns out,
1589
01:23:56,019 --> 01:23:57,889
Cady's actually
just as selfish
1590
01:23:57,889 --> 01:24:00,595
and phony as Regina George.
1591
01:24:02,236 --> 01:24:04,269
So this apology is to myself.
1592
01:24:05,569 --> 01:24:07,371
Because I should've
known better.
1593
01:24:09,034 --> 01:24:10,638
♪ So your best friend
Screwed you over ♪
1594
01:24:10,638 --> 01:24:12,376
♪ Acted nice when
She's not nice ♪
1595
01:24:12,376 --> 01:24:14,312
♪ Well, I have some advice ♪
1596
01:24:14,312 --> 01:24:16,281
♪ 'Cause it's happened
To me twice ♪
1597
01:24:16,281 --> 01:24:19,548
♪ Here's my secret strategy
It always works because ♪
1598
01:24:19,548 --> 01:24:22,485
♪ The world doesn't end
It just feels like it does ♪
1599
01:24:22,485 --> 01:24:25,686
♪ Just raise your right finger ♪
1600
01:24:25,686 --> 01:24:30,020
♪ And solemnly swear ♪
1601
01:24:30,020 --> 01:24:33,232
♪ Whatever they say about me ♪
1602
01:24:33,232 --> 01:24:36,697
♪ I don't care ♪
1603
01:24:36,697 --> 01:24:38,633
♪ I won't twist in knots
To join your game ♪
1604
01:24:38,633 --> 01:24:40,701
♪ I will say
"You make me mad" ♪
1605
01:24:40,701 --> 01:24:43,671
♪ And if you treat me bad
I'll say, "You're bad" ♪
1606
01:24:43,671 --> 01:24:45,607
♪ If I eat alone
From this moment on ♪
1607
01:24:45,607 --> 01:24:47,543
♪ That's just what I'll do ♪
1608
01:24:47,543 --> 01:24:50,711
♪ 'Cause I'd rather be me
I'd rather be me ♪
1609
01:24:50,711 --> 01:24:53,285
♪ I'd rather be me ♪
1610
01:24:53,285 --> 01:24:55,716
♪ Than be with you ♪
1611
01:25:01,295 --> 01:25:03,020
♪ We're supposed
To all be ladies ♪
1612
01:25:03,020 --> 01:25:04,890
♪ And be nurturing and care ♪
1613
01:25:04,890 --> 01:25:06,529
♪ Is that really fair? ♪
1614
01:25:06,529 --> 01:25:08,333
♪ Boys get to fight
We have to share ♪
1615
01:25:08,333 --> 01:25:09,532
♪ Here's the way that
That turns out ♪
1616
01:25:09,532 --> 01:25:11,666
♪ We always understand ♪
1617
01:25:11,666 --> 01:25:14,669
♪ How to slap someone down
With our underhand ♪
1618
01:25:14,669 --> 01:25:18,442
♪ So here is my right finger ♪
1619
01:25:18,442 --> 01:25:22,006
♪ To how girls should behave ♪
1620
01:25:22,006 --> 01:25:25,581
♪ 'Cause sometimes
What's meant to break you ♪
1621
01:25:25,581 --> 01:25:28,947
♪ Makes you brave ♪
1622
01:25:28,947 --> 01:25:32,258
♪ So I will not act all innocent
I won't fake apologize ♪
1623
01:25:32,258 --> 01:25:34,051
♪ Let's just fight
And then make up ♪
1624
01:25:34,051 --> 01:25:35,954
♪ Not tell these lies ♪
1625
01:25:35,954 --> 01:25:37,725
♪ Let's call our damage even ♪
1626
01:25:37,725 --> 01:25:39,760
♪ Clean the slate
Till it's like new ♪
1627
01:25:39,760 --> 01:25:43,027
♪ It's a new life for me
Where I'd rather be me ♪
1628
01:25:43,027 --> 01:25:45,502
♪ I'd rather be me ♪
1629
01:25:45,502 --> 01:25:47,702
♪ Than be with you ♪
1630
01:25:49,541 --> 01:25:51,343
♪ I'll say, "No" ♪
♪ No! ♪
1631
01:25:51,343 --> 01:25:52,905
♪ I'll say, "Knock it off
With your notes ♪
1632
01:25:52,905 --> 01:25:55,248
♪ And your rules
And your games" ♪
1633
01:25:55,248 --> 01:25:57,140
♪ And those sycophants
Who follow you
I'll remember all their names ♪
1634
01:25:57,140 --> 01:26:00,451
♪ And when they drag you down
Like they inevitably do ♪
1635
01:26:00,451 --> 01:26:02,255
♪ I will not laugh along
With them ♪
1636
01:26:02,255 --> 01:26:03,619
♪ And approve
Their palace coup ♪
1637
01:26:03,619 --> 01:26:05,291
♪ 'Cause that's not me ♪
1638
01:26:07,460 --> 01:26:09,053
♪ I don't need
Their good opinions ♪
1639
01:26:09,053 --> 01:26:11,198
♪ I've got plenty of opinions ♪
1640
01:26:11,198 --> 01:26:14,432
♪ Every asshole has opinions
But it doesn't make 'em true ♪
1641
01:26:14,432 --> 01:26:17,864
♪ What's true is being me
And I'd rather be me ♪
1642
01:26:17,864 --> 01:26:20,405
♪ I'd rather be me ♪
1643
01:26:20,405 --> 01:26:22,803
♪ Than be with you ♪
1644
01:26:24,444 --> 01:26:28,171
♪ So raise 'em high
'Cause playing nice and shy ♪
1645
01:26:28,171 --> 01:26:32,648
♪ Is insulting my IQ ♪
1646
01:26:32,648 --> 01:26:36,113
♪ I'd rather be me
I'd rather be me ♪
1647
01:26:36,113 --> 01:26:39,523
♪ I'd rather be me
Than be with you ♪
1648
01:26:39,523 --> 01:26:41,228
Walk away, turd.
1649
01:26:41,228 --> 01:26:44,022
Regina, I'm so sorry!
I didn't mean to hurt you!
1650
01:26:44,022 --> 01:26:46,530
You are
a lowlife version of me...
1651
01:26:46,530 --> 01:26:50,028
♪ I'd rather be me
I'd rather be me ♪
1652
01:26:50,028 --> 01:26:55,374
♪ I'd rather be me
Than be with ♪
1653
01:26:55,374 --> 01:26:58,971
♪ You! ♪
1654
01:27:07,080 --> 01:27:09,982
And that's how
Regina George died.
1655
01:27:09,982 --> 01:27:13,689
Again, no one died!
1656
01:27:13,689 --> 01:27:16,428
I mean, technically, Regina
did die for, like, 15 seconds
1657
01:27:16,428 --> 01:27:18,364
but then she was revived.
1658
01:27:18,364 --> 01:27:21,565
And of course,
the rumor mill
started going insane.
1659
01:27:21,565 --> 01:27:24,062
I just saw
Regina get hit by a bus.
1660
01:27:24,062 --> 01:27:26,471
An artery come out
of her neck and her head
went all the way around!
1661
01:27:26,471 --> 01:27:28,000
Guys, street safety
is so important.
1662
01:27:28,000 --> 01:27:29,771
I'm just sad, like,
that's all I can say.
1663
01:27:33,909 --> 01:27:35,711
We are sending
our love and prayers...
1664
01:27:35,711 --> 01:27:38,142
Link in bio to my GoFundMe
page to raise money.
1665
01:27:38,142 --> 01:27:39,385
Regina, we knew
you would pull through.
1666
01:27:39,385 --> 01:27:40,980
How do I get this
off my algorithm?
1667
01:27:40,980 --> 01:27:42,850
I'm not one
to spread rumors,
1668
01:27:42,850 --> 01:27:45,017
but I'm pretty sure I saw Cady
push her right in front of it.
1669
01:27:45,017 --> 01:27:46,953
On my life, Cady pushed her.
1670
01:27:46,953 --> 01:27:49,494
I literally saw Cady
push Regina.
1671
01:27:49,494 --> 01:27:51,397
Don't fill up my comments,
but... karma.
1672
01:27:51,397 --> 01:27:54,532
Girls are made deranged
by what's called hormones.
1673
01:27:54,532 --> 01:27:55,863
Hormones.
1674
01:27:55,863 --> 01:28:00,274
W-H-O-R...
1675
01:28:06,205 --> 01:28:08,414
F that bitch.
F that wench.
1676
01:28:15,819 --> 01:28:17,390
All right.
1677
01:28:17,390 --> 01:28:21,427
Ms. Norbury is on a, uh,
temporary leave of absence.
1678
01:28:21,427 --> 01:28:23,088
Jail.
Hey.
1679
01:28:23,088 --> 01:28:25,794
I heard that, Miss Rockwell.
1680
01:28:25,794 --> 01:28:28,467
Anyways, we're not sure
who your substitute...
1681
01:28:28,467 --> 01:28:30,304
I did it.
1682
01:28:32,638 --> 01:28:35,639
I wrote that Ms. Norbury is
a drug pusher, and it's a lie.
1683
01:28:46,146 --> 01:28:49,114
Three-week suspension.
1684
01:28:49,114 --> 01:28:52,458
This is not
who I know you to be.
1685
01:28:52,458 --> 01:28:53,459
I know.
1686
01:28:57,696 --> 01:28:59,223
Where is my Ndebele vase?
1687
01:28:59,223 --> 01:29:02,259
What?
What do you mean, what?
1688
01:29:02,259 --> 01:29:05,064
You know, the colorful vase
that's always in that window.
1689
01:29:05,064 --> 01:29:06,439
Where is it?
1690
01:29:10,940 --> 01:29:13,809
I had some friends over
when you were away.
1691
01:29:13,809 --> 01:29:15,107
Go.
1692
01:29:15,107 --> 01:29:16,746
Go do your homework!
1693
01:29:16,746 --> 01:29:18,715
Um, also...
1694
01:29:20,246 --> 01:29:22,620
I need you to sign
my Calculus test,
1695
01:29:22,620 --> 01:29:23,852
'cause I'm failing.
1696
01:29:54,751 --> 01:29:56,588
Hey.
1697
01:29:56,588 --> 01:29:59,558
I guess you'll need this back
to set an alarm for tomorrow.
1698
01:30:00,352 --> 01:30:02,022
Don't want it.
1699
01:30:02,022 --> 01:30:04,255
You only have one message.
1700
01:30:04,255 --> 01:30:06,928
From someone named Karen,
who says:
1701
01:30:06,928 --> 01:30:10,096
"Donut worry.
I am still your freend."
1702
01:30:14,509 --> 01:30:16,707
How bad is it gonna
be tomorrow?
1703
01:30:16,707 --> 01:30:18,478
I was thinking maybe
I should go back
1704
01:30:18,478 --> 01:30:20,139
to being homeschooled.
1705
01:30:20,139 --> 01:30:21,239
Sweetie, no.
1706
01:30:21,239 --> 01:30:22,977
It's too small, me and you.
1707
01:30:22,977 --> 01:30:24,913
And I think
you're learning things now
1708
01:30:24,913 --> 01:30:26,783
that I don't know
how to teach.
1709
01:30:33,055 --> 01:30:34,461
Good night.
1710
01:30:35,530 --> 01:30:37,255
Mom?
Hmm?
1711
01:30:38,995 --> 01:30:43,096
Can you sit with me
till I fall asleep?
1712
01:30:43,901 --> 01:30:44,900
Mm-hmm.
1713
01:30:56,309 --> 01:30:58,452
Oh, sweetie.
1714
01:31:18,771 --> 01:31:21,266
Oh, hi. Did you want
to buy some drugs?
1715
01:31:21,266 --> 01:31:24,071
No, I was just handing
my quiz back.
1716
01:31:24,071 --> 01:31:26,876
You know, when the police
tore apart my house
1717
01:31:26,876 --> 01:31:28,581
looking for imaginary heroin,
1718
01:31:28,581 --> 01:31:31,474
I found this old calculator
that I thought I lost, so...
1719
01:31:31,474 --> 01:31:33,014
totally worth it.
1720
01:31:33,885 --> 01:31:35,181
I'm really sorry.
1721
01:31:35,181 --> 01:31:36,919
Thank you.
1722
01:31:36,919 --> 01:31:38,789
But I know you didn't write
that whole book yourself.
1723
01:31:38,789 --> 01:31:40,186
You gonna tell Mr. Duvall
who did?
1724
01:31:41,486 --> 01:31:42,859
No.
1725
01:31:42,859 --> 01:31:44,960
Trying this new thing
where I don't talk
1726
01:31:44,960 --> 01:31:46,489
about people
behind their backs.
1727
01:31:46,489 --> 01:31:49,701
Getting hit by a bus seems
like enough punishment.
1728
01:31:51,034 --> 01:31:53,364
100.
Welcome back, nerd.
1729
01:31:55,335 --> 01:31:57,775
Will you be attending
the Spring Fling this weekend?
1730
01:31:57,775 --> 01:32:00,107
No. Everyone hates me.
1731
01:32:00,107 --> 01:32:02,340
Perfect, because
I figured out a way for you
1732
01:32:02,340 --> 01:32:03,682
to earn some extra credit.
1733
01:32:03,682 --> 01:32:05,475
Hey, Bird,
you ready to suit up
1734
01:32:05,475 --> 01:32:07,554
and show off
your math schquills?
1735
01:32:07,554 --> 01:32:09,589
Kev, stop trying
to make "schquills" happen.
It's not gonna happen.
1736
01:32:09,589 --> 01:32:12,658
Jacob, get off my dick.
Hey! PG-13, please.
1737
01:32:30,368 --> 01:32:33,008
Welcome to the ICMT
State Math Championships.
1738
01:32:33,008 --> 01:32:34,878
Sponsored by SeatGeek.
1739
01:32:34,878 --> 01:32:36,539
Yeah, SeatGeek!
1740
01:32:36,539 --> 01:32:38,178
Tonight will be
the culmination
1741
01:32:38,178 --> 01:32:41,115
of all you've worked for.
1742
01:32:41,115 --> 01:32:43,183
Each right answer
will be worth two points.
1743
01:32:43,183 --> 01:32:46,890
The highest score at the end
of 40 minutes of play wins.
1744
01:32:46,890 --> 01:32:49,761
As always, no calculators.
1745
01:32:51,061 --> 01:32:53,996
Question one.
Two, three, four!
1746
01:32:59,069 --> 01:33:02,037
Determine the equation of
the tangent line to the graph.
1747
01:33:03,302 --> 01:33:05,502
The answer is B.
Correct.
1748
01:33:05,502 --> 01:33:08,505
Solve the equation above
using prime numbers.
1749
01:33:08,505 --> 01:33:10,617
Prime factor 41.
1750
01:33:10,617 --> 01:33:12,179
Correct.
1751
01:33:12,179 --> 01:33:13,917
Please solve for x.
1752
01:33:13,917 --> 01:33:16,216
x = 2?
Incorrect.
1753
01:33:16,216 --> 01:33:17,921
x is greater
than the value of y.
1754
01:33:17,921 --> 01:33:19,659
Correct.
1755
01:33:21,223 --> 01:33:23,487
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1756
01:33:23,487 --> 01:33:26,226
♪ I didn't get it ♪
1757
01:33:26,226 --> 01:33:30,527
♪ I didn't get it, somehow ♪
1758
01:33:30,527 --> 01:33:34,465
♪ Smart with math
But stupid with love ♪
1759
01:33:34,465 --> 01:33:36,599
♪ I didn't get it ♪
1760
01:33:36,599 --> 01:33:37,842
Negative two!
1761
01:33:37,842 --> 01:33:38,909
Correct.
1762
01:33:38,909 --> 01:33:40,647
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1763
01:33:42,574 --> 01:33:44,816
♪ Whoa-oa-oa
Stupid with love ♪
1764
01:33:44,816 --> 01:33:47,478
Function = mx + c.
Correct.
1765
01:33:47,478 --> 01:33:49,447
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1766
01:33:51,286 --> 01:33:52,890
♪ Whoa-oa-oa
Stupid with love ♪
1767
01:33:52,890 --> 01:33:54,452
Both polynomials
are second degree,
1768
01:33:54,452 --> 01:33:56,058
so the asymptote is at y = 5.
1769
01:33:56,058 --> 01:33:57,763
Excellent.
1770
01:33:57,763 --> 01:33:59,391
♪ I feel my brain
Begin to rust ♪
1771
01:33:59,391 --> 01:34:01,558
♪ I am filled with calcu-lust ♪
1772
01:34:01,558 --> 01:34:03,527
♪ Does this guy work out?
He must ♪
1773
01:34:03,527 --> 01:34:05,771
♪ All sweaty at the gym ♪
1774
01:34:05,771 --> 01:34:10,072
♪ Could that image be more hot?
Let me just enjoy
That thought ♪
1775
01:34:10,072 --> 01:34:11,304
♪ School was rough ♪
1776
01:34:11,304 --> 01:34:12,437
♪ But now it's not ♪
1777
01:34:12,437 --> 01:34:13,471
Negative four?
1778
01:34:13,471 --> 01:34:14,879
True.
1779
01:34:14,879 --> 01:34:16,078
29?
1780
01:34:16,078 --> 01:34:17,244
The slope is zero.
1781
01:34:17,244 --> 01:34:18,575
Incorrect.
1782
01:34:18,575 --> 01:34:20,082
The slope
of the tangent line is four.
1783
01:34:20,082 --> 01:34:22,920
Excellent.
1784
01:34:22,920 --> 01:34:25,582
Well, this has only ever
happened once before.
1785
01:34:25,582 --> 01:34:28,761
Ladies and gentlemen,
we have a tie.
1786
01:34:30,928 --> 01:34:32,391
In the event of a tie,
1787
01:34:32,391 --> 01:34:34,998
we move into a one-on-one
sudden-death round
1788
01:34:34,998 --> 01:34:37,066
where each team
may choose their opponent.
1789
01:34:43,635 --> 01:34:45,140
We pick the girl.
1790
01:34:46,880 --> 01:34:48,539
We pick the girl, too.
1791
01:34:51,379 --> 01:34:53,852
Ms. Krafft, Ms. Heron,
please step forward.
1792
01:35:10,464 --> 01:35:13,465
Nice to meet you.
Whatever, slut.
1793
01:35:13,465 --> 01:35:16,974
Contestants, please find
the limit of this expression.
1794
01:35:21,673 --> 01:35:23,706
You know,
it's not me against you.
1795
01:35:23,706 --> 01:35:26,951
It's North Shore
versus Marymount.
1796
01:35:28,086 --> 01:35:30,053
A very wise teacher...
1797
01:35:30,053 --> 01:35:31,549
The limit is negative one.
1798
01:35:33,058 --> 01:35:34,761
That answer is incorrect.
1799
01:35:37,260 --> 01:35:40,162
If Ms. Heron
can answer correctly,
we have a winner.
1800
01:35:40,162 --> 01:35:43,000
You got this, Golf Bird.
1801
01:35:43,000 --> 01:35:46,003
Why can't I remember
anything about limits?
1802
01:35:46,003 --> 01:35:48,005
Honey, I don't know your life.
1803
01:35:49,668 --> 01:35:51,778
Why did you waste time
insulting me?
1804
01:35:51,778 --> 01:35:53,703
Why did I waste time
judging your hair?
1805
01:35:53,703 --> 01:35:55,408
This is not a competition.
1806
01:35:56,279 --> 01:35:58,147
It kind of is, though.
1807
01:35:58,147 --> 01:35:59,709
Right.
1808
01:36:00,580 --> 01:36:01,920
A math one.
1809
01:36:03,385 --> 01:36:05,220
♪ I was stupid ♪
1810
01:36:06,421 --> 01:36:08,223
♪ But now I get it ♪
1811
01:36:08,223 --> 01:36:12,326
♪ No what ifs, might haves
Could have been if I had ♪
1812
01:36:12,326 --> 01:36:14,691
♪ Only tried, not held back ♪
1813
01:36:14,691 --> 01:36:17,034
♪ That's not a part of my plan ♪
1814
01:36:17,034 --> 01:36:19,102
♪ I see the things
That I missed ♪
1815
01:36:19,102 --> 01:36:21,467
♪ No, that's not the me
That I am ♪
1816
01:36:21,467 --> 01:36:24,437
♪ The limit
It doesn't exist! ♪
1817
01:36:25,473 --> 01:36:27,209
The limit does not exist.
1818
01:36:27,209 --> 01:36:30,212
Our new state champions,
the North Shore Mathletes.
1819
01:36:34,416 --> 01:36:35,888
Yeah, you like that,
Marymount?
1820
01:36:35,888 --> 01:36:38,286
Get some! Get some!
1821
01:36:38,286 --> 01:36:40,024
Don't hold me back!
Don't hold me back!
1822
01:36:40,024 --> 01:36:41,828
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1823
01:36:42,655 --> 01:36:44,457
♪ But now I get it ♪
1824
01:36:44,457 --> 01:36:46,789
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1825
01:36:46,789 --> 01:36:48,967
♪ But now I get it ♪
1826
01:36:48,967 --> 01:36:51,035
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1827
01:36:51,035 --> 01:36:54,104
♪ But now I get it
Stupid! ♪
1828
01:36:54,667 --> 01:36:55,908
Have you seen Jason?
1829
01:36:55,908 --> 01:36:57,976
Like right now
or like ever in life?
1830
01:36:57,976 --> 01:36:59,571
Ohhh, miss!
1831
01:36:59,571 --> 01:37:01,980
I'm supposed to hang
with my fallback in there
1832
01:37:01,980 --> 01:37:03,476
but, you know,
if you wanted to slip out,
1833
01:37:03,476 --> 01:37:05,643
meet in my Jeep or...
Jason!
1834
01:37:05,643 --> 01:37:07,117
It's me!
1835
01:37:07,117 --> 01:37:08,613
"Fallback"?
1836
01:37:08,613 --> 01:37:10,857
No, I... I know.
Yeah, I knew the whole time.
1837
01:37:10,857 --> 01:37:12,991
No, we are done!
1838
01:37:12,991 --> 01:37:14,223
Because you know what?
1839
01:37:14,223 --> 01:37:18,194
I have a 140 IQ,
very toned legs,
1840
01:37:18,194 --> 01:37:20,295
and my parents love me!
1841
01:37:20,295 --> 01:37:22,396
And you will regret this
when you're old
1842
01:37:22,396 --> 01:37:24,871
because I am fricking fetch!
1843
01:37:24,871 --> 01:37:27,566
That's how you use it.
Come on.
1844
01:37:29,634 --> 01:37:31,537
Okay, attention, everybody.
1845
01:37:32,540 --> 01:37:35,475
Whoo-hoo-hoo,
let's go!
1846
01:37:42,814 --> 01:37:43,857
Regina!
1847
01:37:46,851 --> 01:37:48,389
You look pretty.
1848
01:37:50,789 --> 01:37:52,965
I'm wearing
a corrective neck collar.
1849
01:37:59,468 --> 01:38:02,799
I'm sorry about the bus.
I feel like it's all my fault.
1850
01:38:02,799 --> 01:38:05,208
No... No, it's not your fault.
1851
01:38:05,208 --> 01:38:07,947
Cady, don't apologize for
things that aren't your fault.
1852
01:38:07,947 --> 01:38:10,444
But, yeah,
I forgive you, 'cause...
1853
01:38:12,349 --> 01:38:14,184
I'm on a lot
of pain medication right now.
1854
01:38:14,184 --> 01:38:16,956
You know I died
for 15 seconds?
1855
01:38:16,956 --> 01:38:18,023
Yeah.
1856
01:38:19,653 --> 01:38:23,655
Anyway, my mom was really
pumped to be on the news.
1857
01:38:24,964 --> 01:38:26,394
It's weird
when people treat you
1858
01:38:26,394 --> 01:38:27,692
like you're famous
or something.
1859
01:38:27,692 --> 01:38:30,068
It's amazing.
1860
01:38:30,068 --> 01:38:31,432
Until it's not.
1861
01:38:33,238 --> 01:38:37,174
Look, I...
I know I have to change.
1862
01:38:38,276 --> 01:38:40,441
And I was harsh.
1863
01:38:40,441 --> 01:38:42,212
And people say
that I'm a bitch.
1864
01:38:42,212 --> 01:38:44,841
You know what they would
call me if I was a boy?
1865
01:38:44,841 --> 01:38:47,811
Strong.
"Reginald."
1866
01:38:47,811 --> 01:38:51,716
That's what my mom was gonna
name me if I was a boy, so...
1867
01:38:51,716 --> 01:38:54,752
Honestly,
I would rather be "bitch."
1868
01:39:00,628 --> 01:39:02,826
I like you.
1869
01:39:02,826 --> 01:39:05,697
But this medicine
makes me like everyone, so...
1870
01:39:05,697 --> 01:39:07,974
Okay,
do we have all of our nominees
1871
01:39:07,974 --> 01:39:10,636
for the Spring Fling
King and Queen onstage?
1872
01:39:10,636 --> 01:39:13,012
I just want to say
you're all winners.
1873
01:39:13,012 --> 01:39:18,215
And I am retiring as soon
as this evening is over.
1874
01:39:19,546 --> 01:39:22,285
The winner
of the Spring Fling King is...
1875
01:39:22,285 --> 01:39:24,122
Shane Oman.
1876
01:39:26,124 --> 01:39:27,785
Whoo! Yeah!
1877
01:39:31,164 --> 01:39:32,196
Hey.
1878
01:39:33,793 --> 01:39:35,793
Um, have you seen Janis?
1879
01:39:35,793 --> 01:39:38,070
Every day since 2009.
1880
01:39:38,070 --> 01:39:39,566
But she doesn't want
to see you.
1881
01:39:39,566 --> 01:39:42,173
And
your Spring Fling Queen...
1882
01:39:42,173 --> 01:39:44,967
Damian, I'm...
I'm really sorry.
1883
01:39:44,967 --> 01:39:47,310
Cady Heron.
1884
01:39:47,310 --> 01:39:50,049
What?
I mean, of course she is.
1885
01:39:52,414 --> 01:39:54,020
Go, Cady!
1886
01:39:55,617 --> 01:39:56,847
Where is Cady?
1887
01:40:11,402 --> 01:40:12,665
Congratulations.
1888
01:40:16,671 --> 01:40:17,703
Um...
1889
01:40:18,937 --> 01:40:20,871
I think people voted for me
1890
01:40:20,871 --> 01:40:22,411
because they think
I pushed someone
1891
01:40:22,411 --> 01:40:23,775
in front of a bus.
1892
01:40:23,775 --> 01:40:27,020
It's not your fault.
A bus pushed me.
1893
01:40:30,850 --> 01:40:34,126
But what is my fault is
1894
01:40:34,126 --> 01:40:35,688
the way I treated my friends.
1895
01:40:37,494 --> 01:40:40,528
I used you and I lied to you
and I'm... I'm so sorry.
1896
01:40:44,028 --> 01:40:46,666
I'm also sorry to everyone
1897
01:40:46,666 --> 01:40:48,734
whose feelings got hurt
from the Burn Book.
1898
01:40:48,734 --> 01:40:50,340
You know,
it's really not required
1899
01:40:50,340 --> 01:40:51,968
for you to make a speech.
1900
01:40:51,968 --> 01:40:54,080
Right. Almost done,
I promise. Um...
1901
01:40:55,248 --> 01:40:59,184
I think everyone looks
like royalty tonight.
1902
01:40:59,184 --> 01:41:04,750
It just seems weird
for one person to win this.
1903
01:41:07,392 --> 01:41:10,063
I mean,
it's just a chunk of plastic.
1904
01:41:12,331 --> 01:41:14,925
We could just share it.
1905
01:41:18,898 --> 01:41:23,208
♪ Cheap, fake
Easy to break ♪
1906
01:41:23,208 --> 01:41:26,035
♪ That's how I used to be ♪
1907
01:41:26,035 --> 01:41:28,840
Here... Take it.
1908
01:41:28,840 --> 01:41:31,216
♪ Now I'm awake ♪
1909
01:41:31,216 --> 01:41:33,878
♪ I'll tell you what I see ♪
1910
01:41:33,878 --> 01:41:36,881
♪ Plastic don't shine
Glitter don't shine ♪
1911
01:41:36,881 --> 01:41:41,050
♪ Rhinestones don't shine
The way you do ♪
1912
01:41:41,050 --> 01:41:44,427
♪ You are so real
You are so rare ♪
1913
01:41:44,427 --> 01:41:47,056
♪ I see you there ♪
1914
01:41:47,056 --> 01:41:50,763
♪ I see you ♪
1915
01:41:50,763 --> 01:41:53,062
♪ I see stars ♪
1916
01:41:53,062 --> 01:41:56,439
♪ So many stars tonight ♪
1917
01:41:56,439 --> 01:42:00,674
♪ You could make diamonds dull ♪
1918
01:42:00,674 --> 01:42:04,315
♪ You are so beautiful ♪
1919
01:42:04,315 --> 01:42:07,219
♪ I see stars ♪
1920
01:42:07,219 --> 01:42:10,849
♪ You shine as bright as day ♪
1921
01:42:10,849 --> 01:42:14,017
♪ I will look out for you ♪
1922
01:42:14,017 --> 01:42:17,790
♪ We'll light each other's way ♪
1923
01:42:17,790 --> 01:42:21,959
♪ You're all stars ♪
1924
01:42:23,798 --> 01:42:25,501
All right,
have a good time, everyone.
1925
01:42:25,501 --> 01:42:26,568
No vaping.
1926
01:42:26,568 --> 01:42:27,800
Rachel Hamilton!
1927
01:42:27,800 --> 01:42:28,900
Give me that inhaler.
1928
01:42:43,653 --> 01:42:45,554
Are you still mad at me?
1929
01:42:45,554 --> 01:42:47,952
I don't know.
Are you still an asshole?
1930
01:42:48,823 --> 01:42:50,229
I don't think so?
1931
01:42:56,567 --> 01:42:57,995
Cute.
1932
01:42:59,669 --> 01:43:02,274
♪ Wherever darkness falls ♪
1933
01:43:02,274 --> 01:43:07,477
♪ I'll be the light ♪
1934
01:43:07,477 --> 01:43:11,041
♪ To guide you home ♪
1935
01:43:11,041 --> 01:43:13,186
She sounds good.
1936
01:43:14,178 --> 01:43:16,651
But she does not
go here, y'all.
1937
01:43:16,651 --> 01:43:19,522
Would you look over there?
Oh, my gosh!
1938
01:43:21,856 --> 01:43:24,021
Do you want to dance?
Yeah.
1939
01:43:29,061 --> 01:43:31,930
Congrats on winning state.
The jacket looks, uh,
really good on you.
1940
01:43:31,930 --> 01:43:35,604
Thanks. It has a pocket inside
for a calculator.
1941
01:43:35,604 --> 01:43:36,869
What?
Yeah.
1942
01:43:36,869 --> 01:43:38,035
Grool.
1943
01:43:39,410 --> 01:43:40,774
Grool.
1944
01:43:43,449 --> 01:43:46,714
♪ You stars ♪
1945
01:43:46,714 --> 01:43:50,322
♪ So many stars tonight ♪
1946
01:43:50,322 --> 01:43:53,182
♪ I see stars ♪
1947
01:43:53,182 --> 01:43:54,854
And that was
the first time in history
1948
01:43:54,854 --> 01:43:57,362
that Spring Fling
was actually fun.
1949
01:43:57,362 --> 01:44:02,026
Ms. Norbury and
Mr. Duvall got wasted. JK, JK.
1950
01:44:02,026 --> 01:44:04,798
Karen discovered
the safe joy
1951
01:44:04,798 --> 01:44:07,900
of dancing with theater boys.
1952
01:44:07,900 --> 01:44:11,739
And Plastics and Jocks
partied with math nerds.
1953
01:44:11,739 --> 01:44:13,345
Janis danced
to a pop song
1954
01:44:13,345 --> 01:44:15,039
and didn't burst into flames.
1955
01:44:15,877 --> 01:44:17,844
Ow. Ow. Ow!
1956
01:44:17,844 --> 01:44:20,814
And everyone else
just kind of floated.
1957
01:44:23,280 --> 01:44:25,621
So the moral
of our story is thus:
1958
01:44:25,621 --> 01:44:28,019
Calling someone stupid
won't make you any smarter.
1959
01:44:28,019 --> 01:44:30,054
And even the people
you really don't like
1960
01:44:30,054 --> 01:44:32,562
are still people
who just want to coexist.
1961
01:44:32,562 --> 01:44:35,059
So get off their dicks!
1962
01:44:38,229 --> 01:44:40,196
♪ I see ♪
1963
01:44:40,196 --> 01:44:44,035
♪ Stars! ♪
1964
01:44:48,270 --> 01:44:49,975
♪ Where she at?
What she doing? ♪
1965
01:44:49,975 --> 01:44:52,010
♪ Who she with
And where she from? ♪
1966
01:44:52,010 --> 01:44:53,913
♪ Well, she's this
Oh, she's that ♪
1967
01:44:53,913 --> 01:44:56,212
♪ She's a flight risk
On the run ♪
1968
01:44:56,212 --> 01:44:58,016
♪ She's back, she's back ♪
1969
01:44:58,016 --> 01:44:59,886
♪ Yeah, I'm back, bitch
Are you done? ♪
1970
01:44:59,886 --> 01:45:03,791
♪ Excuse me
While I bite my tongue ♪
1971
01:45:03,791 --> 01:45:07,861
♪ I'm back on that same shit
From before ♪
1972
01:45:07,861 --> 01:45:11,502
♪ I can't take this pettiness
Now I'm bored ♪
1973
01:45:11,502 --> 01:45:15,770
♪ We can champagne
There's enough for us all ♪
1974
01:45:15,770 --> 01:45:18,773
♪ Told you who I am
And what it is
It's not my fault ♪
1975
01:45:18,773 --> 01:45:22,810
♪ It's not my fault
You came with her
But she might leave with me ♪
1976
01:45:22,810 --> 01:45:26,451
♪ It's not my fault
You've got to pay
For what I get for free ♪
1977
01:45:26,451 --> 01:45:28,651
♪ It's not my fault ♪
1978
01:45:28,651 --> 01:45:30,620
♪ You're like, you're like
You're like in love with me ♪
1979
01:45:30,620 --> 01:45:32,622
♪ It's not my fault
You're like in love with me ♪
1980
01:45:32,622 --> 01:45:34,954
♪ You're like in love with me ♪
1981
01:45:34,954 --> 01:45:38,529
♪ Get her number, get her name
Get a good thing
While you can ♪
1982
01:45:38,529 --> 01:45:42,830
♪ Kiss a blonde, kiss a friend
Can a gay girl get an amen? ♪
1983
01:45:42,830 --> 01:45:46,262
♪ I'm back on that same shit
From before ♪
1984
01:45:46,262 --> 01:45:50,134
♪ I can't take this pettiness
Now I'm bored ♪
1985
01:45:50,134 --> 01:45:54,237
♪ We can champagne
There's enough for us all ♪
1986
01:45:54,237 --> 01:45:56,448
♪ I told you who I am
And what it is ♪
1987
01:45:56,448 --> 01:45:58,978
♪ It's not my fault
It's not my fault ♪
1988
01:45:58,978 --> 01:46:01,277
♪ You came with her
But she might leave with me ♪
1989
01:46:01,277 --> 01:46:03,147
♪ It's not my fault ♪
1990
01:46:03,147 --> 01:46:05,919
♪ You've got to pay
For what I get for free ♪
1991
01:46:05,919 --> 01:46:09,285
♪ It's not my fault
You're like, you're like
You're like in love with me ♪
1992
01:46:09,285 --> 01:46:11,793
♪ It's not my fault
You're like in love with me ♪
1993
01:46:11,793 --> 01:46:13,795
♪ You're like in love with me ♪
1994
01:46:13,795 --> 01:46:15,665
♪ I mean, who wouldn't want
To be in love with me ♪
1995
01:46:15,665 --> 01:46:17,667
♪ I'm a mood board
Girls got to Pinterest me ♪
1996
01:46:17,667 --> 01:46:19,702
♪ I'm a stallion but they come
And f... me like Trojan ♪
1997
01:46:19,702 --> 01:46:22,001
♪ And it wouldn't be me
If I ain't cause commotion ♪
1998
01:46:22,001 --> 01:46:24,641
♪ I'm so bad
Dudes thought I was AI
I ballin' like AI ♪
1999
01:46:24,641 --> 01:46:27,138
♪ I stick to a whole lot
Of paper like a stapler
Stack like Jenga ♪
2000
01:46:27,138 --> 01:46:29,041
♪ And you basic bitch
Get stroke like a painter ♪
2001
01:46:29,041 --> 01:46:31,175
♪ It's funny how the mean girl
Open all the doors ♪
2002
01:46:31,175 --> 01:46:33,078
♪ I've been told y'all
I'm the black Regina George ♪
2003
01:46:33,078 --> 01:46:35,014
♪ Bikini top, booty shorts
Megan core ♪
2004
01:46:35,014 --> 01:46:36,818
♪ You was hating back then
Now you finna hate more ♪
2005
01:46:36,818 --> 01:46:38,787
♪ I got influence
They do anything I endorse ♪
2006
01:46:38,787 --> 01:46:41,053
♪ I run s...
To be a bad bitch is a sport ♪
2007
01:46:41,053 --> 01:46:43,726
♪ I woke up hotter
Than I was yesterday ♪
2008
01:46:43,726 --> 01:46:47,829
♪ Don't care about no rules
'Cause I always get my way ♪
2009
01:46:47,829 --> 01:46:49,666
♪ It's not my fault ♪
2010
01:46:49,666 --> 01:46:52,163
♪ You came with her
But she might leave with me ♪
2011
01:46:52,163 --> 01:46:55,705
♪ It's not my fault
You've got to pay
For what I get for free ♪
2012
01:46:55,705 --> 01:46:59,302
♪ It's not my fault
You're like, you're like
You're like in love with me ♪
2013
01:46:59,302 --> 01:47:02,338
♪ It's not my fault
You're like in love with me ♪
2014
01:47:02,338 --> 01:47:03,812
♪ You're like in love with me ♪
2015
01:47:06,375 --> 01:47:08,619
♪ A sexy Quint
From sexy Jaws ♪
2016
01:47:08,619 --> 01:47:10,456
♪ Catching sexy sharks ♪
2017
01:47:10,456 --> 01:47:13,888
♪ Sexy Eleanor Roosevelt
Or sexy Joan of Arc ♪
2018
01:47:13,888 --> 01:47:17,760
♪ I can be a sexy pirate
Or a sexy ballet dancer ♪
2019
01:47:17,760 --> 01:47:22,127
♪ I can be a sexy doctor
And cure some sexy cancer! ♪
2020
01:47:34,207 --> 01:47:35,976
♪ Happy Halloween! ♪
2021
01:47:39,784 --> 01:47:43,247
♪ This is
Modern feminism talkin' ♪
2022
01:47:43,247 --> 01:47:46,888
♪ Watch me as I run the world
In shoes I cannot walk in ♪
2023
01:47:46,888 --> 01:47:50,287
♪ I can be who I want to be ♪
2024
01:47:50,287 --> 01:47:53,895
♪ And sex... sex ♪
2025
01:47:53,895 --> 01:47:58,735
♪ Sexy! ♪
2026
01:47:58,735 --> 01:48:00,968
I'm a sexy mouse. Duh!
2027
01:52:00,407 --> 01:52:01,879
You're next.
2028
01:52:01,879 --> 01:52:04,475
You could be really hot
if you change, like,
2029
01:52:04,475 --> 01:52:05,817
everything.
153595
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