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♪ The Simpsons ♪
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D'
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Aah!
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Why, Homer, you silly goose,
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the weed whacker's just
for the edges.
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- You're gonna be out here all day.
- I'm almost done.
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You are a picture and a half.
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Well, if you're finished
by tomorrow, come on over
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and strap on the feedbag.
We're gonna fire up
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ol' Propane Elaine
and put the heat to the meat.
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- Nummy-nummy-num!
- I'll be there!
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Notty-notty-not.
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"The Flanders are having
a beef-a-thon!
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Incredible Nedibles!
Maudacious Vittles!"
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I think it means
he's having a barbecue.
16
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Well, why doesn't
he just say so?
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He's trying to be friendly.
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You know, if you gave
Ned Flanders a chance...
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Here we go again.
Look, I don't care
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if Ned Flanders is
the nicest guy in the world.
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He's a jerk.
End of story.
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Well, we can't
hold it against him
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just because he has things
a little better than we do.
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Excuse me? Better?
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Thanks a lot, Marge.
You really put me in my place.
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- Homer.
- Don't get me wrong.
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It's worth feeling
three inches tall
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to find out what kind
of a person you really are,
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Marge Simpson,
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president of the international
"We Love Flanders" Fan Club!
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Fee, fie, foe, fum!
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I smell the potatoes au gratin
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of Marge Simpson.
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Hi, Ned.
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Um... Homer sends
his apologies
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but, um...
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there was some important work
at the plant
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that only he could take care of.
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00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:43,913
We now return you
to exciting 15th-round action
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00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:45,623
at the Canadian Football
League draft.
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00:02:45,707 --> 00:02:47,375
And so, the Saskatchewan
Rough Riders,
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who scored only four rouges
all last season, Jack...
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Stupid Flanders.
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Go ahead, Marge.
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Have a ball.
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What if they came back
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and I was dead from not eating?
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They'd cry their eyes out.
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"We should have never gone
to the Flanders'.
50
00:03:01,055 --> 00:03:02,891
"Why did we go
to the Flanders' house
51
00:03:02,974 --> 00:03:05,268
and leave Homer alone
with no food?"
52
00:03:05,351 --> 00:03:07,896
And I'd be laughing...
Laughing from my grave.
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Heh, heh, heh.
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What is it, boy? What?
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Barbecue.
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Hey, everyone, I'm back.
Nice to see you. Nice to meet you.
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Hey!
58
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Hey, hey, Homer!
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Okay. Thanks for coming.
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00:03:48,978 --> 00:03:51,189
- You're it.
- Electricity.
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No electricity.
Electricity only in freeze tag.
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Okay. Now you're it!
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00:03:55,109 --> 00:03:56,861
- Hey! No tag-backs!
- Yeah, you cheater.
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00:03:56,945 --> 00:03:58,821
You lie like a fly
with a booger in its eye.
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The fly was funny,
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00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:03,660
and the booger
was the icing on the cake.
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00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:05,578
Friends, we love you all,
68
00:04:05,662 --> 00:04:08,414
but I also have
a sinister motive
69
00:04:08,498 --> 00:04:09,874
for asking you all here...
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00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:12,001
Sinister being Latin
for left-handed.
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00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:13,878
But enough joking.
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00:04:13,962 --> 00:04:15,338
- That was a joke?
- Shh!
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00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:17,131
As of Friday,
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00:04:17,215 --> 00:04:19,175
I'm saying toodle-loo
to the pharmaceutical game.
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00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:21,487
- Leaving? I can't believe it.
- What's he talkin' about?
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00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:25,598
No, I kid you not. Here's the noose
I had to wear for ten years.
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What are you going to do, Ned?
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00:04:29,727 --> 00:04:31,813
Well, sir, like one out
of every nine Americans,
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I'm left-handed,
and let me tell you
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it ain't all peaches and cream.
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Your writing gets smeared,
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Lord help you if you want to
drive a standard transmission.
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- Amen to that.
- Well, sir,
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00:04:41,531 --> 00:04:43,783
I'm opening up
a one-stop store for southpaws.
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00:04:43,866 --> 00:04:46,786
Everything from
left-handed apple peelers
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00:04:46,869 --> 00:04:48,413
to left-handed zithers.
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Going to call it
"The Leftorium."
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00:04:55,712 --> 00:04:57,338
So, Homer, I'm dying to know.
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00:04:57,422 --> 00:04:58,840
What do you think
of The Leftorium?
90
00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:01,384
It sounds like
a pretty dumb idea to me.
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00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:03,219
Well, I know it's
a little risky,
92
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,805
and it's going to be
a lot of hard work,
93
00:05:05,888 --> 00:05:08,141
but, gosh darn it, it's going
to be a lot of fun too.
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00:05:08,224 --> 00:05:10,768
Fun? Where is this store,
Flanders?
95
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The merry old Land of Oz?
96
00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:14,522
No. The Springfield Mall.
97
00:05:14,605 --> 00:05:16,858
- Here, you two, make a wish.
- Nah!
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00:05:16,941 --> 00:05:18,651
- It's fun.
- No, it isn't.
99
00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:21,654
Hey, you must have something
you want to wish for, Homer.
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00:05:21,738 --> 00:05:24,032
Let's see...
101
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Nah.
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00:05:28,119 --> 00:05:30,330
- Hey!
- Come on, Homer.
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00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:32,415
I've got an ambition
to do some wishin'.
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Keep your pants on, Flanders!
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I'm wishing as fast as I can!
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Ooh!
107
00:05:39,964 --> 00:05:43,051
Heh, heh, heh, heh.
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00:05:43,134 --> 00:05:45,261
Too far.
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00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:47,346
Okay, ready.
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Yes! Yes!
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Read it and weep!
In your face!
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- I've got more chicken bone!
- What did you wish for, Homer?
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No! No, no, no.
Don't say.
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Otherwise, it won't come true.
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Ooh, that would be a shame.
116
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Wouldn't it, Flanders?
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♪ They fight and fight ♪
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♪ They fight
and fight and fight ♪
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♪ Fight-fight-fight,
fight-fight-fight ♪
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♪ The Itchy & Scratchy Show ♪
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♪ Dum-da-dah... ♪
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Duh!
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Bart!
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00:06:56,541 --> 00:06:59,043
How many hours a day
do you watch TV?
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00:06:59,127 --> 00:07:01,796
Six... seven if there's
something good on.
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00:07:01,879 --> 00:07:05,049
Don't you think you should get a little
fresh air and maybe some exercise?
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00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:07,135
Yeah, but what are
you going to do?
128
00:07:07,218 --> 00:07:09,262
Marge, TV gives so much
and asks so little.
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00:07:09,345 --> 00:07:11,055
It's a boy's best friend.
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That's the problem.
131
00:07:12,557 --> 00:07:14,058
Even as we speak,
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00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:16,853
millions of children
are staring at the TV,
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00:07:16,936 --> 00:07:19,814
instead of getting
some much-needed exercise.
134
00:07:19,897 --> 00:07:22,137
Those children's parents should be
ashamed of themselves.
135
00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:26,028
Hello, I am Akira. Huah!
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That didn't hurt very much
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00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:30,324
because I know the ancient art
of karate.
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Karate focuses the mind
and gives one self-confidence.
139
00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:36,873
People from all walks of life:
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00:07:36,956 --> 00:07:38,708
- Doctors.
- Hi-yah!
141
00:07:38,791 --> 00:07:40,168
- Homemakers.
- Hu-yah!
142
00:07:40,251 --> 00:07:42,795
- Landscape architects.
- Yah!
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00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:44,547
- Choreographers.
- Haww.
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High karate at low, low prices.
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I cannot tell a lie.
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This is a great deal. Hohh!
147
00:07:51,179 --> 00:07:52,472
Ha!
148
00:07:52,555 --> 00:07:54,390
Hey, Mom, how about
if I learn karate?
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00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:56,017
Will that make you happy?
150
00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:57,727
That sounds fine, Bart.
151
00:07:57,810 --> 00:08:00,605
See, Marge, you knock TV,
and then it helps you out.
152
00:08:00,688 --> 00:08:03,608
I think you owe somebody
a little apology.
153
00:08:10,948 --> 00:08:13,493
Well, if it isn't The Leftorium.
154
00:08:13,576 --> 00:08:16,704
Hey, Flanders, how's business?
155
00:08:16,787 --> 00:08:17,955
A little pokey
156
00:08:18,039 --> 00:08:19,319
but things are going to pick up.
157
00:08:19,373 --> 00:08:20,541
Ooh!
158
00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:22,084
I am so sorry.
159
00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:23,836
How much do I owe you?
160
00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:26,172
Now, you put that money away.
That was an accident.
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00:08:26,255 --> 00:08:27,507
Really?
162
00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:28,590
Well, thanks.
163
00:08:28,633 --> 00:08:30,885
Could you validate my parking?
164
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Absitively posolutely.
165
00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:36,307
So, Flanders,
have you sold anything?
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00:08:36,390 --> 00:08:38,726
Not yet, but one
of the mall security guards
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00:08:38,809 --> 00:08:40,436
took a good long look
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00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:42,688
at a left-handed ice cream scoop.
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00:08:42,772 --> 00:08:44,649
Greetings, I am Akira,
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your guide on the path
to true karate.
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00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:50,238
And this is our map,
The Art of War by Sun-Tzu.
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00:08:50,321 --> 00:08:53,115
It will teach us
our most important lesson.
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We learn karate
so that we need never use it.
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00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:57,328
Um, excuse me sir.
175
00:08:57,411 --> 00:08:59,288
I already know
how not to hit a guy.
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00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:01,249
Can we break out the nunchukas?
177
00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:03,834
Yes, the impetuousness of youth.
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00:09:03,918 --> 00:09:06,629
- For now, let us read.
- Akira, my good man,
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00:09:06,712 --> 00:09:08,357
when do we break blocks
of ice with our heads?
180
00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:10,841
First you must fill your head
with wisdom.
181
00:09:10,925 --> 00:09:12,260
Then, you can hit ice with it.
182
00:09:12,343 --> 00:09:13,695
Yo, Sensei,
can I go to the bathroom?
183
00:09:13,719 --> 00:09:15,846
You can if you believe you can.
184
00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:17,598
Pay money to read books.
185
00:09:17,682 --> 00:09:19,350
The hell with this.
186
00:09:22,853 --> 00:09:25,356
Come on. Touch of death!
Touch of death! Touch of death!
187
00:09:25,439 --> 00:09:26,607
Touch of death.
188
00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:33,739
I'm telling you,
189
00:09:33,823 --> 00:09:36,534
Flanders' store was dee-serted.
190
00:09:36,617 --> 00:09:39,370
So, what do you think of your
bestest buddy now, Marge?
191
00:09:39,453 --> 00:09:42,415
Dad, do you know what schadenfreude is?
192
00:09:42,498 --> 00:09:45,293
No, I do not know
what schadenfreude is.
193
00:09:45,376 --> 00:09:48,045
Please tell me,
because I'm dying to know.
194
00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:50,631
It's a German term
for "shameful joy."
195
00:09:50,715 --> 00:09:52,550
Taking pleasure
in the suffering of others.
196
00:09:52,633 --> 00:09:57,471
Come on, Lisa. I'm just
glad to see him fall flat on his butt.
197
00:09:57,555 --> 00:09:59,682
He's usually all happy
and comfortable
198
00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:03,019
and surrounded by loved ones,
and it makes me feel...
199
00:10:03,102 --> 00:10:04,871
What's the opposite of that
"shameful joy" thing of yours?
200
00:10:04,895 --> 00:10:05,938
Sour grapes.
201
00:10:06,022 --> 00:10:08,649
Boy, those Germans have
a word for everything.
202
00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:10,943
So Bart, what did you learn
in karate school today?
203
00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:13,613
Yeah, come on, boy, this better
be worth my ten bucks.
204
00:10:13,696 --> 00:10:16,532
I learned the touch of death.
205
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:19,160
- Ooh, the touch of death.
- Permit me to demonstrate.
206
00:10:19,243 --> 00:10:22,788
Lisa, shut your eyes.
Soon you will be at peace.
207
00:10:22,872 --> 00:10:25,291
Hey, quit it, Bart. Quit it. Hey!
208
00:10:25,374 --> 00:10:27,460
Quit it! Quit it!
Quit it! Quit it! Mom!
209
00:10:27,543 --> 00:10:30,046
Bart, don't use the touch
of death on your sister.
210
00:10:31,839 --> 00:10:33,424
♪ They fought and fit ♪
211
00:10:33,507 --> 00:10:34,967
♪ They fought
and fought and fit ♪
212
00:10:35,051 --> 00:10:36,594
♪ Fought-fought-fought,
fit-fit-fit ♪
213
00:10:36,677 --> 00:10:38,596
♪ The Itchy and Scratchy Show ♪
214
00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:40,640
Got to get back to karate class.
215
00:10:43,184 --> 00:10:45,186
- Missed a spot.
- Dopey kid.
216
00:10:47,396 --> 00:10:49,541
Alright, coming through.
Outta my way. Move it or lose it.
217
00:10:49,565 --> 00:10:51,359
- Step aside, lady.
- Baby.
218
00:10:52,777 --> 00:10:54,904
Hey, boy.
How was class?
219
00:10:54,987 --> 00:10:56,757
Today, we learned how
to rip a man's heart out
220
00:10:56,781 --> 00:10:58,824
and show it to him
before he dies.
221
00:10:58,908 --> 00:10:59,950
Ooh, that will learn him.
222
00:11:02,453 --> 00:11:03,913
What did you swipe?
223
00:11:03,996 --> 00:11:05,581
An "I Love Lefty" shot-glass.
224
00:11:05,665 --> 00:11:08,376
- Left-handed pinking shears.
- Pinking shears?
225
00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:11,128
Let's go to the food court
and steal some baked potatoes.
226
00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:15,549
Hey, Flanders,
when are your busy hours?
227
00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:18,636
I expect things to start
picking up soon.
228
00:11:18,719 --> 00:11:21,806
Yeah, I think word of mouth
is starting to spread.
229
00:11:21,889 --> 00:11:24,475
Hey, I hear you validate
parking tickets without purchase.
230
00:11:24,558 --> 00:11:26,394
Right as rain.
231
00:11:26,477 --> 00:11:28,813
Or as we say around here,
"left as rain."
232
00:11:28,896 --> 00:11:31,816
- Just stamp the ticket.
- Okay.
233
00:11:34,443 --> 00:11:37,363
Hey, Homer, how's your
neighbor's store doing?
234
00:11:37,446 --> 00:11:40,574
Lousy.
He just sits there all day.
235
00:11:40,658 --> 00:11:43,327
He'd have a great job
if he didn't own the place.
236
00:11:45,121 --> 00:11:47,748
Crummy right-handed corkscrews.
237
00:11:47,832 --> 00:11:49,166
What does he sell?
238
00:11:49,250 --> 00:11:51,001
Well, actually, Moe...
239
00:11:53,671 --> 00:11:54,672
I don't know.
240
00:11:56,674 --> 00:11:59,301
- Hey, Lise, change the channel.
- You change it.
241
00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:03,097
Okay, okay.
242
00:12:04,807 --> 00:12:06,809
I grow weary
of this new channel.
243
00:12:06,892 --> 00:12:08,811
- Change it back.
- But, Bart...
244
00:12:10,771 --> 00:12:13,858
Apple... apple... apple...
245
00:12:13,941 --> 00:12:15,943
Come on, candy bar.
246
00:12:16,026 --> 00:12:18,696
Hey, I know you.
You're that first apple I didn't want!
247
00:12:18,779 --> 00:12:20,656
That sinks it.
248
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,783
I'm really going
to let them have it this time.
249
00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:32,084
Simpson, put that box
on Mr. Burns' desk.
250
00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:33,252
Chop-chop!
251
00:12:35,087 --> 00:12:38,340
Look, Smithers
252
00:12:38,424 --> 00:12:39,884
another member
of our nuclear family
253
00:12:39,967 --> 00:12:41,302
with some helpful suggestions.
254
00:12:41,385 --> 00:12:42,762
And what's your name?
255
00:12:42,845 --> 00:12:44,013
Homer Simpson, sir.
256
00:12:44,096 --> 00:12:46,891
- Simpson?
- I'm Monty Burns.
257
00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:52,271
"Keep that handsome owner
out of sight.
258
00:12:52,354 --> 00:12:54,648
He's distracting
the female employees."
259
00:12:54,732 --> 00:12:56,108
Smithers?
260
00:12:56,192 --> 00:12:57,943
Got me, sir.
261
00:12:58,027 --> 00:12:59,945
It's a real one.
262
00:13:00,029 --> 00:13:03,324
"No more apples
in the vending machine, please."
263
00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:05,701
Well, that's almost a sentence.
264
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:08,788
- Can I leave, Mr. Burns?
- Of course, and don't worry,
265
00:13:08,871 --> 00:13:11,791
there will be plenty
of apples for you.
266
00:13:11,874 --> 00:13:14,960
Nobody will take away
your precious apples.
267
00:13:15,044 --> 00:13:16,837
But the note was
asking you to...
268
00:13:16,921 --> 00:13:18,881
No, no, no!
Tell my secretary
269
00:13:18,964 --> 00:13:20,925
I said you could have
a free apple.
270
00:13:21,008 --> 00:13:24,762
She'll make everything all right,
I promise.
271
00:13:26,847 --> 00:13:28,891
Damned infernal gizmo.
272
00:13:28,974 --> 00:13:31,060
My kingdom for
a left-handed can opener!
273
00:13:31,143 --> 00:13:33,646
Mr. Burns?
274
00:13:33,729 --> 00:13:36,524
Come on, Homer,
tell him about the store.
275
00:13:36,607 --> 00:13:37,900
I'm dying out here.
276
00:13:37,983 --> 00:13:39,443
Sorry, Flanders.
277
00:13:44,198 --> 00:13:45,616
Are you sure
you're not interested?
278
00:13:45,699 --> 00:13:48,577
$200 is only the asking price.
279
00:13:48,661 --> 00:13:50,371
- Sorry, Ned.
- Hey, I'm flexible.
280
00:13:50,454 --> 00:13:52,706
You don't have to pay
all at once.
281
00:13:52,790 --> 00:13:55,584
I'll be here all night,
if you change your mind.
282
00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,670
Hey, Flanders,
is everything okay?
283
00:13:57,753 --> 00:14:00,065
Yeah, sure. Thought I'd just
get rid of some of the clutter.
284
00:14:00,089 --> 00:14:01,715
See anything you like?
285
00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:04,301
I get it.
It's not good enough for you,
286
00:14:04,385 --> 00:14:06,220
but it's good enough for me?
287
00:14:06,303 --> 00:14:09,223
Well, I wouldn't be caught
dead buying this... Hello.
288
00:14:09,306 --> 00:14:11,475
Got your eye on the gas grill?
289
00:14:11,559 --> 00:14:13,978
- She's a butane beaut.
- I'll give you 20 bucks for it.
290
00:14:14,061 --> 00:14:18,440
Twenty? Homer, I paid $300
for this just last year.
291
00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:20,794
You were swindled, my friend.
Twenty bucks. Take it or leave it.
292
00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:23,112
- Homer, be reasonable.
- Sorry!
293
00:14:23,195 --> 00:14:25,781
No cash for Neddy.
Homer keep all money.
294
00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,992
Bye-bye, Neddy. Bye-bye.
295
00:14:28,075 --> 00:14:29,994
All right, Homer.
296
00:14:30,077 --> 00:14:31,579
- $20?
- $20.
297
00:14:31,662 --> 00:14:33,038
- Now I don't want it.
- What?
298
00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:35,165
I changed my mind.
It was a passing fancy.
299
00:14:35,249 --> 00:14:37,501
Although, perhaps if you
threw in a few lawn chairs,
300
00:14:37,585 --> 00:14:41,463
maybe that tool bench,
it might rekindle my interest.
301
00:14:43,674 --> 00:14:46,135
Hey, Bartely-boobely.
Care for a steakarooni?
302
00:14:46,218 --> 00:14:48,363
Sounds scrum-diddley-umptious,
dear old duddely-doodely.
303
00:14:48,387 --> 00:14:52,558
Duddely-doodely.
304
00:14:52,641 --> 00:14:55,060
Homer, this is the Flanders'
entire living room set.
305
00:14:55,144 --> 00:14:56,562
How much did you pay for this?
306
00:14:56,645 --> 00:14:58,397
Only 75 beans.
307
00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:01,275
$75? Ned must be desperate.
308
00:15:01,358 --> 00:15:03,819
I'm sure you did nothing
to discourage this,
309
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:05,946
you scavenger of human misery.
310
00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:08,365
Hey! Keep your hands off
my china hutch.
311
00:15:08,449 --> 00:15:11,994
♪ Let's go
to Barney's Bowl-er-ama... ♪
312
00:15:13,996 --> 00:15:17,082
Good afternoon, sir.
I'm Chuck Ellis
313
00:15:17,166 --> 00:15:19,168
from the Springfield
Collection Agency,
314
00:15:19,251 --> 00:15:20,604
and I'm here to ask you
why you don't think
315
00:15:20,628 --> 00:15:22,379
you need to pay your bills.
316
00:15:22,463 --> 00:15:25,841
I know I need to pay them,
but there's just so many.
317
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:28,278
Does it make you feel good about
yourself to owe people money?
318
00:15:28,302 --> 00:15:30,846
We've been very patient
with you, Mr. Flanders.
319
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,848
I know, but... Wait a minute.
320
00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,183
I'm Homer Simpson.
321
00:15:34,266 --> 00:15:35,976
Ned Flanders lives over there.
322
00:15:36,060 --> 00:15:39,396
Flanders is in debt? Are you sure?
323
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:41,774
We don't make mistakes.
324
00:15:41,857 --> 00:15:44,068
Damned right-handed ledgers.
325
00:15:44,151 --> 00:15:46,831
- I can't write in these things.
- Why, there's a store where you...
326
00:15:46,862 --> 00:15:48,656
- Hey, you said you're Homer Simpson?
- Yeah.
327
00:15:48,739 --> 00:15:50,741
- See you on Thursday.
- D'
328
00:15:50,824 --> 00:15:52,952
Knock 'em dead, boy.
329
00:15:53,035 --> 00:15:55,412
Kid's going to be
a black belt in no time.
330
00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:11,303
♪♪
331
00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:13,055
Hey, check out the saxophone.
332
00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:15,933
Pretty boss, but there's
something stuck on it.
333
00:16:16,016 --> 00:16:17,059
Hey!
334
00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:19,895
Hey, look at me.
335
00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:21,146
I'm Elvis, man!
336
00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:22,439
You give that back!
337
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:23,565
That belongs to me!
338
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:25,150
If you want it, just take it.
339
00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:29,113
Okay. We're sorry.
340
00:16:29,196 --> 00:16:32,825
This time we're really
going to give it to you.
341
00:16:32,908 --> 00:16:34,326
Hey, stop that!
342
00:16:39,790 --> 00:16:41,583
Hey, Lise, something wrong?
343
00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:43,794
Not anymore!
344
00:16:43,877 --> 00:16:45,462
You punks are about to get
345
00:16:45,546 --> 00:16:47,673
a taste of your own medicine.
346
00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:51,468
This is my brother,
and he knows karate.
347
00:16:51,552 --> 00:16:54,346
We're real scared.
348
00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:56,724
Please don't hurt us, Bart.
349
00:16:56,807 --> 00:16:59,268
What are you going to do?
Throw your diapers at us?
350
00:17:01,103 --> 00:17:03,355
Yeah, just keep laughing.
351
00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:05,399
It only makes him madder.
352
00:17:05,482 --> 00:17:07,735
C'mon Bart. Start them off
with the touch of death
353
00:17:07,818 --> 00:17:09,528
and go from there.
354
00:17:09,611 --> 00:17:11,739
I think they've learned
their lesson already, Lise.
355
00:17:11,822 --> 00:17:13,866
No, we want to see
the touch of death.
356
00:17:13,949 --> 00:17:16,827
Yeah. Come on, Karate Kid,
waste me.
357
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:26,295
It's funny how two wrongs
sometimes make a right.
358
00:17:31,383 --> 00:17:33,969
Homer! Over here.
359
00:17:35,637 --> 00:17:38,974
Flanders, I want to give you
your stuff back.
360
00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:42,311
Well, there's no house
to put it in, Homer.
361
00:17:42,394 --> 00:17:44,855
Not since that nice fellow
from the bank...
362
00:17:44,938 --> 00:17:48,317
Who was only doing his job...
Came and locked it up.
363
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:49,902
You're gonna live in your car?
364
00:17:49,985 --> 00:17:53,072
No. It's just
a little camp-out tonight,
365
00:17:53,155 --> 00:17:55,449
then off to my sister's
apartment in Capital City.
366
00:17:55,532 --> 00:17:57,034
Hey, what do you think, kids?
367
00:17:57,117 --> 00:17:58,494
The big city.
368
00:18:00,871 --> 00:18:03,665
Say, Todd, I want to talk
to your Uncle Homer.
369
00:18:03,749 --> 00:18:05,268
You're head of the car
till I get back.
370
00:18:05,292 --> 00:18:06,877
Okay, Dad.
371
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:08,504
♪ Grey skies
are gonna clear up ♪
372
00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:11,131
♪ Put on a happy face ♪
373
00:18:11,215 --> 00:18:13,926
♪ Brush off the clouds
and cheer up ♪
374
00:18:14,009 --> 00:18:15,928
♪ Put on a happy face... ♪
375
00:18:16,011 --> 00:18:19,264
Listen to that singing.
376
00:18:19,348 --> 00:18:21,391
Those poor fools.
377
00:18:21,475 --> 00:18:23,852
Homer, I'm ruined.
378
00:18:23,936 --> 00:18:25,604
I know.
379
00:18:25,687 --> 00:18:27,272
At times like these
380
00:18:27,356 --> 00:18:29,858
I used to turn to the Bible
and find solace,
381
00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:32,277
but even the good book
382
00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:35,030
- can't help me now.
- Why not?
383
00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:37,616
I sold it to you for seven cents.
384
00:18:37,699 --> 00:18:41,286
You know,
ever since that barbecue,
385
00:18:41,370 --> 00:18:43,247
nothing's gone right.
386
00:18:43,330 --> 00:18:46,917
It's like there's been
a curse on me.
387
00:18:48,335 --> 00:18:50,170
It's all my fault.
388
00:18:50,254 --> 00:18:52,089
- No, it's not.
- Yes, it is.
389
00:18:52,172 --> 00:18:54,007
No! You tried to warn me
390
00:18:54,091 --> 00:18:55,926
about gambling
my family's future
391
00:18:56,009 --> 00:18:58,053
on some pig in a poke.
392
00:18:58,137 --> 00:18:59,596
I didn't listen.
393
00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:01,348
Homer, you were a true friend.
394
00:19:01,431 --> 00:19:03,433
No, I was a swine.
395
00:19:03,517 --> 00:19:05,811
- Listen, Flanders.
- What?
396
00:19:05,894 --> 00:19:07,437
Do you still have that store?
397
00:19:07,521 --> 00:19:08,939
For two more days.
398
00:19:09,022 --> 00:19:12,234
Then it becomes
Libertarian Party headquarters.
399
00:19:12,317 --> 00:19:14,194
I hope they have better luck
than I did.
400
00:19:14,278 --> 00:19:16,446
Flanders, you open
that store tomorrow.
401
00:19:16,530 --> 00:19:18,198
Homer, there's no point.
402
00:19:18,282 --> 00:19:20,367
I said do it!
403
00:19:22,911 --> 00:19:24,913
Hello, Jerry? Homer Simpson.
404
00:19:24,997 --> 00:19:27,499
Remember last month
when I paid back that loan?
405
00:19:27,583 --> 00:19:31,170
Well, now I need you
to do a favor for me.
406
00:19:31,253 --> 00:19:33,922
A left-handed corkscrew?
407
00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:35,132
Baby!
408
00:19:35,215 --> 00:19:37,676
"Kiss me, I'm left-handed"?
409
00:19:39,636 --> 00:19:42,139
That's a classic.
Whoa!
410
00:19:42,222 --> 00:19:45,100
- Homer Simpson's on the phone.
- Tell him I went out.
411
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:46,852
He needs you
to help Ned Flanders.
412
00:19:46,935 --> 00:19:48,145
Ned Flanders is in trouble?
413
00:19:49,646 --> 00:19:51,315
Smithers, I'm licked.
414
00:19:51,398 --> 00:19:52,941
You open this can.
415
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:54,860
Okay, but you softened
it up for me, sir.
416
00:19:56,028 --> 00:19:57,362
Hold it, Smithers.
417
00:19:57,446 --> 00:19:59,156
- I'll open the can.
- But, sir, how?
418
00:19:59,239 --> 00:20:01,617
To the mall!
I'll explain on the way.
419
00:20:07,539 --> 00:20:11,043
Hurry, Neddy, hurry.
Golly, it's a miracle.
420
00:20:12,461 --> 00:20:14,129
Come on, ya' lefties.
421
00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:15,297
What did I tell you?
422
00:20:15,380 --> 00:20:17,007
Homer?
423
00:20:17,090 --> 00:20:20,469
It's all here,
and it's all backwards.
424
00:20:20,552 --> 00:20:21,678
That's right.
425
00:20:28,018 --> 00:20:32,397
Well, the worm has turned,
has it not, my tin-plated friend?
426
00:20:32,481 --> 00:20:35,317
Look at you...
You who were once so proud.
427
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:39,154
Feel the wrath
of the left hand of Burns.
428
00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:42,199
My life begins today.
429
00:20:42,282 --> 00:20:44,326
Wow! What an icebreaker.
430
00:20:44,409 --> 00:20:45,953
Left-handed ledgers.
431
00:20:46,036 --> 00:20:48,247
Now, I can write
all the way to the edge.
432
00:20:48,330 --> 00:20:51,250
Left-handed nunchukas.
433
00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:53,502
Wow!
434
00:20:53,585 --> 00:20:57,506
The boys at the Diners Club
will think I've gone quite mad.
435
00:20:57,589 --> 00:21:00,175
I'll have that roadster
in the corner as well.
436
00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:05,472
- Yes, sir.
- Huzzah for the shopkeep.
437
00:21:05,555 --> 00:21:07,432
Huzzah!
438
00:21:07,516 --> 00:21:11,228
Homer, affordable tract housing
made us neighbors,
439
00:21:11,311 --> 00:21:13,105
but you made us friends.
440
00:21:13,188 --> 00:21:14,564
To Ned Flanders,
441
00:21:14,648 --> 00:21:17,359
the richest left-handed man
in town.
442
00:21:17,442 --> 00:21:19,111
Everybody!
443
00:21:19,194 --> 00:21:20,612
♪ Grey skies are
gonna clear up ♪
444
00:21:20,696 --> 00:21:23,156
♪ Stick out that noble chin ♪
445
00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:25,951
♪ Wipe off
that full-of-doubt look ♪
446
00:21:26,034 --> 00:21:28,787
♪ Slap on a happy grin ♪
447
00:21:28,870 --> 00:21:34,167
♪ And spread sunshine
all over the place ♪
448
00:21:34,251 --> 00:21:39,006
♪ Just put on a happy face ♪
449
00:21:44,886 --> 00:21:46,722
♪♪
450
00:22:49,242 --> 00:22:50,827
Shh!
451
00:22:54,081 --> 00:22:56,958
CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY
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