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1
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♪♪
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♪♪
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-Hand my friends over
and I'll let you live!
4
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-You misunderstand.
5
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Bounty hunters don't negotiate.
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-Any last words, Crite?
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-Yes.
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Now!
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♪♪
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♪♪
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-Ah!
-Oh!
12
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-Ladies and gentlemen,
13
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it appears there are
hundreds of hairy balls
14
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descending through the air!
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-[ Screaming ]
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-He brought them to us!
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He's gone full-Crite!
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Make peace with your gods!
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-No!
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♪♪
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♪♪
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-Aah!
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-Sheriff,
it's just like the video!
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-No shit!
25
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-There are red ones?
What do they do?
26
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Oh.
-Yes! Keep eating!
27
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-But the bounty hunters
are gone.
28
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Let's get Christopher
and his friends
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and get the hell out of here.
30
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-My people have traveled far
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and performed marginally
above expectations.
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They deserve this feast.
33
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Keep eating!
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Keep eating until there
is nothing left to eat!
35
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Oh, yes, I see
it's turning you on.
36
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Deep down, it always did.
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The carnage.
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The bloodshed.
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The mayhem...
40
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[ Choking, gagging ]
41
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Why?
42
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-I won't let you have my son.
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Christopher!
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-Guys!
-Christopher!
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-Everything's gonna be okay!
Come on!
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-You came back for us.
47
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-That's how I roll.
48
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Dana, there's something
that I have to tell you.
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-I know how you feel about me.
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-I knew it!
51
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-Charlie told me.
52
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And if I wasn't such an idiot,
53
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I probably would've
noticed sooner.
54
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Sorry that I didn't.
55
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-Listen, I know that I'm not...
56
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sexy in the traditional sense.
57
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Or...
58
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in any sense anymore, but --
-I think you're beautiful.
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-I'm gonna leave you two alone.
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-Really?
-Yeah. I do.
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-Gonna hit the high road.
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♪♪
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♪♪
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♪♪
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-Your very existence
threatens the universe.
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You must be destroyed.
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-Hey! Delivery guy?
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This package is damaged.
69
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-I don't get it.
70
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-Double entendre, bitch!
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Oh, hell no!
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Wait! Oh, wait!
Don't you have balls?
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I was just kidding!
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♪♪
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[ Stomach rumbles ]
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Whoa!
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-[ Growls ]
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♪♪
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-Aah!
80
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-Good shooting, Sheriff.
81
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-We're basically invincible.
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-Aah!
That's right, motherfuckers!
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♪♪
84
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-Everything's gonna be okay.
85
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[ Screaming ]
86
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-Mom!
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♪♪
88
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Mom?
Everything's gonna be okay.
89
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Just stay still.
90
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-How bad is it?
91
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-Uh...
92
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-On a scale of 1 to 10,
with 10 being really bad?
93
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-Oh. Uh...
94
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-4?
95
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-Uh...
96
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-Mm, 6?
97
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Uh, uh...
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Oh, I'm not gonna make
spin class on Monday.
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You may be half-Crite, but
you're nothing like them, Chris.
100
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Your heart is bigger than all
their little bodies together.
101
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I love you, Pork Chop.
102
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-I love you, too, Mom.
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♪♪
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♪♪
105
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-You will achieve
your spot in this world.
106
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Or some other world.
107
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Need any Viagra?
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♪♪
109
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♪♪
110
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♪♪
111
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[ High-pitched whine ]
112
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[ Both screaming ]
113
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-Aah!
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♪♪
115
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♪♪
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♪♪
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-Officials are still
trying to make sense
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of the senseless attack
that occurred at Livingston's
119
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45th Annual "Meat Your Destiny"
Hot Dog Eating Championship.
120
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Multiple witnesses are
giving accounts
121
00:08:05,833 --> 00:08:08,923
of "extra-terrestrials"
and "hairy black balls,"
122
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but the attack was apparently
foiled by one heroic senior
123
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from Sotto Valley High School.
124
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-No, my eyes are fine.
125
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What don't you get?
126
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It's my ears.
127
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It's my bleeding ears.
128
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-Chris?
129
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-Dana, uh...
130
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Look, I know
what you're thinking.
131
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You said you don't like
destructive assholes.
132
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And look at what I just did.
133
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-I know.
134
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-I guess this is
just who I am.
135
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It's in my blood.
136
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-You don't have to
explain yourself to me.
137
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You were a hero today.
138
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Whoa, what are you doing?
139
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-Oh, I -- I thought that, uh...
140
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you wanted...
we were gonna, uh...kiss?
141
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-How about you try
asking me on a date first?
142
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-Dana?
-Yes, Chris?
143
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-Would you like
to go out sometime?
144
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-I'll think about it.
145
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-Guys, I got the prize money
and the trophy!
146
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Let's bail!
147
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♪♪
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-[ Laughing ]
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♪♪
150
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♪♪
151
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♪♪
152
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♪♪
153
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♪♪
9347
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