All language subtitles for Gomer Pyle U S M C S05E27 Hare Today Gone Tomorrow 1080p BluRay FLAC2 0 H 264-BTN_track5_[eng]

[marching band plays]

[male announcer] Gomer Pyle - USMC.

Starring Jim Nabors as Gomer Pyle.

Also starring Frank Sutton
as Sergeant Carter.

[Marines cheering]

- All right, knock it off, you crumbs.
- Hit the road, let's go. Come on.

Hit the road.

Come on, come on, move, move, move, move.

Just because you've been fighting
a little brush fire

don't mean
you got the rest of the day off.

Habab, fall in!

All right, at ease.

Now you people listen up.

Since the fire loused up our schedule
for today,

first thing tomorrow morning
we'll head for the rifle range.

Pyle.

Why is a rabbit
sticking out of your shirt?

Oh, you mean this rabbit?

You got another one?

No, sir.

Well, you see, what happened was,

is there he was, sitting there
all trembling and scared to death

about ten feet from the fire
when I come along. So I thought...

Get rid of it, Pyle.

- But Sergeant, I just...
- Get rid of it fast, you got that?

Yes, sir.

Are you sure, Roger?

You sure your little girl wouldn't like
a real live bunny for a pet?

- They make awful nice pals.
- I'm sorry, Gome.

It took me two months talking my wife
into letting her have an ant farm.

Why don't you just turn it loose?
That's the easy way out.

I know, but, well, he's such a cute
little feller, and he's so friendly.

It's almost like
he knows he owes his life...

Excuse me a minute, Rushkie.

Hey, little boy, can I ask you something?

Hey, a real rabbit!

Well, that's what I wanted
to ask you about.

- Can I hold him?
- Well, yeah, you sure can.

What's his name?

Well, I'd say that's left up to you.

- Would you like him?
- You mean you want to give him away?

Uh-huh.

Since I gotta get rid of him

and you two seem to be getting on
just fine, would you like him?

I sure would.

Only I'd better ask first.

Can I?

It'll just take a minute
and I know it'll be okay.

Well, sure, I'll wait right here for you.

Isn't he great, Uncle Ed?

Uh, yes. Yes he is, Danny.

- Uh, he's a present, you say?
- Uh-huh.

From a Marine who can't keep him.
I told him I'd ask you first.

But Danny,
you're only visiting for the weekend.

It hardly seems worth all the trouble
just for a few days.

But if you let me keep him,
I can take him home with me.

But don't you think we should check
with your mom and dad?

Sure, Uncle Ed.

But they already said I could have a pet
as soon as I decided what I wanted.

Well, okay,
if you're sure they won't mind.

But you'll have to promise
to take care of him when you get home.

I will, Uncle Ed, I promise.

All right, Danny. Now, if you don't mind,

he's sitting on classified information.

Thank you.

Why don't you name him Pinky?

Pinky?

No. That's like
we're making fun of his eyes.

I know. I just thought of a name.

Why don't we call him Harvey?

Harvey?

It's from a play that I saw
when I was in high school.

And it's all about this big rabbit
named Harvey that was six feet tall.

Only he wasn't real,
except to this friend of his.

And to him,
he was just as real as could be.

And smart, almost like he was human.

Harvey...

Seeing you talk to him so much
made me think of that.

Harvey.

That sounds nice.

And he is awful smart.

Hi, Harvey. Look!
He's twitching his nose at me.

I think he likes it.

Why don't you put Harvey in here
and see how he likes his new home?

- There you go, Harvey.
- There you are.

Isn't it neat, Harvey?

Your own house, thanks to Gomer.

Hi, Harvey. I like that name.

Gomer, what happened
to Harvey in that play?

Oh, he and his friend
went off to this home together,

- just as happy as could be.
- That's good.

Listen, I gotta get back to duty.
You don't stay out here too long, now.

All right, Gomer.

See ya later, Gomer.

Hi, Harvey. Come here, boy.
Come on, fella.

Slater! Over here.

This will be fine. They'll hold
the field inspection right through here.

Right, Sarge.

- What's that?
- What's what?

That.

Beats me.

Ain't that the rabbit Pyle had,
the one I told him to get rid of?

- Sure looks like it.
- He built a little house for it.

Well, how can you be sure it was Pyle?

Come on, look at this thing.

Only the Pied Piper of Camp Henderson
could have built it.

All right. Come on, rabbit.

Come on, boy. There we go. Scoot, scoot.

Scoot, scoot.

Wait till I get a hold
of that knucklehead.

- I'm gonna tell him once and for all...
- Hey! What are you doing?

- Huh?
- You let Harvey go.

- What are you talking about?
- You let him go.

Harvey? Harvey!

Harvey! Harvey!

What was that all about?

Who's Harvey?

Who's that kid?

I don't know.
You suppose it was an officer's kid?

I hope not.

Harvey?

- That's him! That's the sergeant.
- Oh, Sergeant.

- Sir?
- That's the man who let him go.

All right, Danny, I'll take care of this.

At ease, Sergeant.

Sergeant Carter, it seems there was
a little mistake made this morning,

according to my nephew here.

Nephew?

Oh, hi there, son.

In any case, he had a rabbit,
and I understand you let him run free.

Oh, was that your rabbit?

- Yes, it was.
- What happened, Sergeant?

Eh, well, you see, sir,

what happened was that I thought
it belonged to one of my men.

If you're talking about Private Pyle,
he's the man who gave it to Danny.

- I didn't know that, sir.
- I'm sure you didn't, Sergeant.

I just wish there were some way
to get the little fellow back.

With the colonel's permission, sir,
I'll sure try.

Don't you worry, son.
We'll get little Peter Cottontail back.

His name is Harvey
and you'll never find him.

- Never!
- Oh, don't say that.

I'm gonna try.

You hear that, Danny? I have
the fullest confidence in the sergeant,

especially now that he knows
how much it means to you.

- Right, Sergeant?
- Uh, right, sir.

- Carry on.
- Yes, sir.

I can understand
how you can be stupid enough

to give a rabbit to the colonel's nephew,

but how could you be stupid enough
not to tell me about it?

But Sergeant, I didn't know who he was.

And at the time,
I didn't even think to ask.

Of course not. You never think, Pyle.

That'd take something you ain't got...
a brain.

Well, golly, Sergeant, I sure am sorry,

but I didn't know you was gonna
come along and let the rabbit loose.

But I got rid of it like you told me to,
'cause I knew you'd be angry if I...

- Find the rabbit, Pyle.
- Harvey?

Harvey. Find it.

Sergeant, there must be hundreds of little
white rabbits in the woods around here.

That's right, Pyle,
and one of them's Harvey.

- But Sergeant...
- Find him!

[crunching]

[chewing]

[crunch]

- [chewing]
- Shh!

What are you shushing me for? I'm hungry!

We've been sitting out here
for almost two hours.

I'm sorry, Sergeant, but it takes time.
Harvey's gotta get hungry.

Thanks for getting me into this, Pyle.

I'm supposed to be getting ready
for an inspection,

and here I am, sitting out in the woods
with a string wrapped around my finger,

waiting for a rabbit
to work up an appetite.

- Shh!
- Hmm?

Now.

You got him, Sergeant, you got him!
I told you my trap would work.

Well, it figures, Pyle.

You want to catch a rabbit, you go out
and find a guy with a rabbit brain.

- [chuckles]
- Hi, Harvey.

- Hi, Harvey.
- There we go.

- There you go.
- [laughs]

We got him!

Golly, I just can't wait
to see the look on Danny's face.

And the colonel's face,
don't forget the colonel's face.

Gomer!

- Oh, hi, Danny.
- You got him! You got Harvey!

- Just like I promised. [laughs]
- Hi, boy.

What's the matter?

- It's not him.
- Huh?

[Gomer] Well, sure it is, Danny.

The sergeant caught him
in the same place he let him go.

- But it's not Harvey.
- It's gotta be.

It's not, I can tell.

- Uncle Ed!
- No, wait. Shh!

Listen, uh, maybe it's Harvey's brother.

He's soft and white and everything, and...

Look at him wiggle his nose.
That's how much he loves you.

But it's not Harvey. Uncle Ed!

But kid... wait a minute.

A promise is a promise.
I'll find Harvey for you.

We'll just let this one go.

[Gomer] Excuse me, Sergeant,
but don't you think we'd better keep him?

- Huh?
- So as we don't waste our time

catching him all over again,
since how he looks so much like Harvey?

Oh, yeah, Pyle. Good idea.

Look, Danny, give me until noon tomorrow.
I'll find Harvey for you, okay?

Okay.

And don't go worrying Uncle Ed.
He's the colonel.

He's got lots of things on his mind.
Come on, Pyle.

All right, you people, listen up.

This morning we will proceed
to the survival course,

a phase of training
which proves that the Marine in the field

is only as good
as his ability to survive off the land.

Now, as you all know,
the woods around here

are just teeming
with little white rabbits,

about so big.

Therefore, as a test of your ability

to catch the protein
necessary for your survival

should supply lines be cut,

you will split up into pairs of two each
and proceed to...

Sergeant? Excuse me, Sergeant.

What is it, Pyle?
Am I going too fast for you?

No, sir. I just wanted to be sure
everybody understood that these rabbits

is just for catching and not for cooking.

Oh!

Um, naturally this is just an exercise.

I will therefore expect every man

to proceed in a humane and careful manner

when returning with his white rabbit

to the starting point,
where I will be waiting.

Now, remember,
that's one white rabbit for each team.

About so big, with the normal pink eyes.

- Well?
- Nope.

This isn't Harvey either.

Aw, come on.

- We've still got one more to go, Sergeant.
- Here.

Don't tell me.

- I'm sorry, Sergeant.
- [whimpers]

I know how hard you and Gomer tried.
But maybe Uncle Ed'll have an idea.

No, no!

Don't bother Uncle Ed.

I told you, he's a busy man.

It's just like I was telling Gomer
this morning,

if at first you don't succeed,
try, try again.

- That right, Gomer?
- When was that, Sergeant?

Never mind,
just get them rabbits outta here!

Yes, sir, it's no use
crying over spoiled milk.

We got work to do, and that's that.

But listen, Danny.

We'll do our part, but you gotta do yours.

- What?
- Stay away from Uncle Ed.

And last on the order of
Monday's inspection will be the barracks.

Gentlemen, you all know the importance
of an IG inspection.

Therefore, I expect you to act
accordingly. Are there any questions?

Good.

Then I can expect nothing less
than a top-notch effort.

Dismissed.

- Oh, Sergeant Carter.
- Sir?

One moment.

- Sir.
- At ease.

Danny told me what happened this morning.

- Too bad.
- Oh, yes, sir.

I'm sorry about that, sir.

It'll be a shame if Danny
had to go back home tomorrow

without his little friend.

Tomorrow?

[chuckles] You should have heard

Danny talking on the phone to his folks
about that rabbit.

His dad's even getting a hutch ready
for him in the back of his quarters.

- Quarters?
- Yes.

Danny's father is in the service, too.
My brother-in-law.

Oh, you certainly know the name.

Brigadier General Louis Dormeier,

in charge of Marine personnel
at the Pentagon.

General Dormeier?

That's right.

Oh, then that would be
little Danny Dormeier.

[nervous laughter] And he wants his rabbit.

Boy, oh boy.

Seventeen-fifty they soaked me!

Seventeen-fifty for two pounds of sawdust
and a couple of glass eyes.

I sure hope your idea works, Sergeant.

Are you kidding?

You gotta know kids, Pyle, and I know 'em.
You gotta work on they're fickle.

- They're what?
- Fickle. Fickle.

They can't stick with anything
for more than two minutes.

Just watch, one look at this thing

and that kid'll forget
all about his dumb rabbit.

- Hi, Danny.
- Did you find Harvey?

Well, as a matter of fact, we didn't.

Aw.

- Sergeant has a better idea.
- Let me say it, please.

I'm footing the bill.

Come on over here, Danny.

[chuckles]

Allow me to introduce you
to Harvey the second.

A stuffed Harvey?

Yeah, how about that?

And he's washable too,
and guaranteed non-allergic.

- You like him, Danny?
- [yelling] Sure he likes him.

But I don't, Sergeant.

He's nothing like Harvey.

Are you kidding? Look at this thing.

He's soft and cuddly and...

and he's clean.

No muss, no fuss.
You could even take him to bed with you.

And rabies.

You don't have to worry about him
getting rabies. What do you say?

- It's not Harvey.
- I know what he means, Sergeant.

There's nothing that can replace
a real live pet.

Pyle, what are you?

An Arnold Benedict?

Look, Danny, take him. You'll like him.

No. I don't want him. Uncle Ed!

Danny, don't do that.
You're bothering Uncle Ed.

Good evening, sir.

Evening, Sergeant, Private.
Uh, what do we have here?

Oh, well, uh, this is a little present
for Danny, sir.

Until we find the real thing.

But the sergeant said
this was supposed...

That's just what I said.
This is supposed to be

until we find the real thing.

[laughs] Here, take him.

Take him! Let's go, Pyle. Good night, sir.

Pyle!

Danny, believe me. These ain't
the same ones we caught before.

These are nine new ones. Pyle, tell him.

That's right, Danny,
and we caught 'em nearby,

so it's hard to believe
that one of 'em ain't Harvey.

Try again, huh? Maybe you was
just too excited. [chuckles]

I don't have to.
I know Harvey isn't there.

But how? How?

They all look just alike,
every one of 'em.

No, they don't. There isn't one of 'em

that has a little black spot
on his front leg.

Huh? What are you talking about?

Harvey had a little black spot
on his front leg.

Shazam!

Now that I think of it, he's right.
It was right over here.

You could see it when you was hugging him.

Pyle, why?

Why? Why didn't you tell me before?

Golly, Sergeant, I guess I just forgot.

Why didn't you tell me?

You didn't ask me.

[bell dings]

Oh. Yes, sir. Can I help you, sir?

Uh, yeah. You sell rabbits, don't you?

For every commercial use possible.

Medical, table,
agricultural, you just name it.

How about lovable, like for a pet?

[chuckles] Well, naturally.

All my little guys are lovable.
I mean, what's to hate about a rabbit?

You got a few hours?

- How much are they?
- Five bucks apiece, 50 a dozen.

Okay, I'll take a white one
with a black spot on its leg.

- I beg your pardon?
- A black spot.

Well, why do you need a black spot?

Believe me, it's a long story.

It starts with a kid
and it ends with a general.

Okay, I'll try to get one for you
by tomorrow.

Tomorrow? But I gotta have it to go.

It'll take me hours to go through
all the white rabbits

I got in here and out back.

You gotta help me.
Believe me, it's an emergency.

Uh, okay.

That'll be $15.

You just said five bucks.

For the rabbit.

The other $10 is a finder's fee.

My time's worth something, ain't it?

Hey! Hey Danny, come here.

Well, hey, Sergeant.

Hi, Danny.
I was over at Uncle Ed's looking for you.

Pyle, why ain't you working?

Oh, we just took those last nine rabbits
and put 'em with the rest of 'em.

Yeah? Well, you can just turn around
and let 'em all go, Pyle.

You mean this is Harvey?

Yeah, and this time for real.

Hi, Harvey! Hiya, fella.

Golly, just like that.

Well, once I got the description straight.

- This isn't Harvey.
- What are you talking about?

Don't you see?
The spot's on the wrong leg.

But you said he had a spot right here.

Well, no I didn't, Sergeant.

I said the spot was on the other side.

Pyle!

We're never gonna find him.

I just know it!

I'm sorry, Sergeant. I thought you knew
which side the spot was on.

Take the rabbit, Pyle.

I know how bad
you feel about this, Sergeant.

Just take the rabbit, Pyle.

Danny's not leaving
until late this afternoon.

When I want a countdown, I'll ask for it.

Now take the rabbit!

Sergeant? I was just thinking.

Harvey's gotta be somewhere on the base,
what with the fence and all.

So why don't you put a notice up
on the bulletin board

and offer a reward?

Forget it, Pyle. I'm broke.

I've just got $10 to last me
for the rest of the month,

thanks to that miserable rabbit.

[scraping]

Ten bucks reward. Looks like the sarge
has blown his whole bankroll

on this thing. Any results?

Well, just seven more false leads is all.

They all had spots,
but they was in the wrong place.

- I guess the sergeant told you.
- He didn't have to.

I got the message when he dented
the file cabinet with his fist.

Excuse me, Private.

Are you bringing that rabbit
in answer to the sergeant's ad?

Well, the offer's still good, isn't it?

It sure is, if it's the right one.

Do you mind if I take a look?

No, go ahead.

You can see it's got
the spot and everything.

Hmm.

Gosh, I'm sure sorry, Private,
but that's just a spot of dirt.

See? It rubs right off.

Huh?

How about that?

And I nearly broke my neck
crawling under the mess hall.

Do you mind if we keep him here

so somebody else won't waste their time
catching him all over again?

Be my guest.

Just another false lead.

Yeah, well,
you better let me take it, Gomer.

And, uh, stand back about 20 yards,
in case the sarge blows out the walls.

- [Carter] Yeah, what is it?
- It's me, Sarge. Is it all clear?

[Carter] Yeah, come on in.

Is that it? Did you get it?

Afraid not, Sarge.
Just another false alarm.

Sure. What else?

Well, at least he had a little spot
on him. Just a smudge of dirt.

It rubbed right off.

A spot?

And it rubbed off?

- Yeah, like I said, it was just a...
- Slater, lock the door.

- What?
- Lock the door.

Sarge, it ain't gonna work.
The shoe polish is too shiny.

Yeah.

See if the one with the paint is dry yet.

Nah. No good.

The spot ran down under his stomach.

Want to take another try
with the marking pen?

Nah, that looked as bad
as the axle grease.

Oh, wait a minute.
Get another fresh rabbit.

Right.

- India ink?
- Yeah.

It dries fast and it doesn't come off.
Hold him.

Hey, that looks good, Sarge.

Yeah.

[laughs] It's gonna work, Slate,
it's gonna work!

[knock at door]

- Who is it?
- [Gomer] It's me and Danny, Sergeant.

Eh, just a minute.

Come on, quick.

Put that junk away.

Right, Sergeant.

Just a second.

Danny!

What a coincidence.

I was just on my way over to see you.

Look what I got here.

- It's him! It's Harvey!
- Yeah.

Well, I'll be, it is Harvey.
He's got the spot and everything.

- Thank you, Sergeant!
- Where did you find him?

Oh, out in the woods.

It's just a matter of sticking with it
and a little ingenuity, right, Slater?

Right, Sarge.
Where there's a will, there's a way.

Well, I guess all that leaves

is just getting these little fellers
back to the woods where they belong.

- You don't have to do that, Pyle...
- Hey, Sergeant?

That one's got a spot on him too.

And so does this one.

Only this one's all smeared
underneath his belly.

Uh, let me have him.

Sergeant, this spot's coming off.

And it smells like paint.

And this spot isn't real either.

The fur on top is black,
but underneath it's white.

I think somebody's trying
to trick us, Sergeant.

Let me see that.

It isn't him. It isn't Harvey.

Yeah.

What some guys won't do
for a ten-buck reward.

Danny!

Pyle!

Sergeant, we've still got an hour
before Danny has to leave for the airport.

If there was some way we could just...

Shazam!

What's the matter with me?

In general,
or do you want to go alphabetical?

I don't know why
I didn't think of it before.

- I mean, where to look for Harvey.
- Forget it, Pyle.

I don't have room
for any more of your ideas.

Now get outta here. Out!

Out, out, out, out, out, out, out. Out!

Well, Danny will be leaving
in about five minutes.

- What are you gonna tell him, Sarge?
- What can I tell him?

I couldn't find his rabbit.

The colonel sure ain't gonna like that.

What's worse, Danny's father ain't gonna
like it. Brigadier General Louis Dormeier.

Slater, you don't have to
keep reminding me.

Well, what are you gonna tell him?

I told you, I'm going to tell him
the truth. I couldn't find his rabbit.

Sure. Sure, what can they do to you?

Yeah. What can they do to me?

[whimpers] Might as well get it over with.

Well, uh, here they come.

See ya later, Sarge.

- Sergeant Carter.
- Good afternoon, sir.

Hi, Sergeant. Did you find him?

Did you, Sergeant?

Well, sir, Danny,
the fact of the matter is, I...

[Gomer] Sergeant Carter? Danny?

Wait a minute.

- Look what I found.
- Is it Harvey?

It sure is.

It is Harvey!

Congratulations, Pyle.
How did you find him?

Wasn't me that found him, sir,
it was Sergeant Carter.

- Huh?
- After the sergeant rounded up

all the other rabbits in the woods,
I guess Harvey got lonesome.

He went on back to the little hutch that
Danny and I had him in in the first place.

Well, that's great.

All right, Danny,
you can get in the car now.

Congratulations, Sergeant.

I wasn't aware that you knew so much
about animal instinct.

Oh, thank you, sir.

I guess it comes from
my mother's side of the family.

She was a farm girl, you know.

[laughs] And then there was Tag.

He was my dog.
I could read him like a book.

I'm going back 20, 25 years now.

I remember one day...

[inaudible]

- Okay, let's go, Pyle.
- [Colonel Gray] Oh, Sergeant Carter.

Hold it, Pyle.

- Good morning, sir.
- I thought you might like to know

that I just spoke to General Dormeier
on the phone,

and he was telling me that Danny and
his rabbit are getting along just fine.

Oh, good. Good, sir.

By the way,
whoever thought up the name Harvey?

That's an interesting name for a pet.

Well, sir, I was...

Well, actually, Colonel,
we went through a lot of names

before we came up with Harvey.

But the fact of the matter is,
Harvey just seemed to fit him so well.

Part of your, uh, natural instinct
with animals, Sergeant?

Well, it's all part of it, sir.

I see.

Well, it may interest you to know

that Harvey gave birth to six babies
at 5:00 this morning.

Carry on, Sergeant.

Go-o-Olly!