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1
00:00:23,066 --> 00:00:24,894
Make sure
I'’m in the frame.
2
00:00:25,068 --> 00:00:26,852
Make sure you get my head.
I want to see my hair.
3
00:00:27,027 --> 00:00:28,767
All right, all right.Janis, hurry up!
4
00:00:28,941 --> 00:00:30,247
It'’s not easy
making a movie.
5
00:00:30,421 --> 00:00:31,553
You better not
drop my phone.
6
00:00:32,380 --> 00:00:33,555
You got it?
7
00:00:33,729 --> 00:00:35,513
- Yep. Yep. Yep.
- Okay, here we go.
8
00:00:35,687 --> 00:00:37,298
Hey... Oh, Lord. Shit.
9
00:00:37,472 --> 00:00:39,430
We'’re Cloverfielding.
Pick it up.
10
00:00:39,604 --> 00:00:41,563
Give me a minute. Make sure
I'’m in the frame, girl.
11
00:00:41,737 --> 00:00:44,609
- Give me a minute!
- Am I in the frame?
12
00:00:44,783 --> 00:00:45,958
I'’m in there? Yes.
13
00:00:46,133 --> 00:00:47,264
Get me in the frame? Yeah.
14
00:00:47,438 --> 00:00:48,483
You got my head in there? Yeah.
15
00:00:48,657 --> 00:00:50,833
Boom, let'’s go.
16
00:00:51,007 --> 00:00:53,183
♪ It'’s a cautionary tale ♪
17
00:00:53,357 --> 00:00:55,185
♪ Of fear and lust and pride ♪
18
00:00:55,359 --> 00:00:59,407
♪ Based on actual events
Where people died ♪
19
00:00:59,581 --> 00:01:00,843
No one died.
20
00:01:01,017 --> 00:01:02,062
♪ But how far
Would you go ♪
21
00:01:02,236 --> 00:01:04,542
♪ To be popular and hot? ♪
22
00:01:04,716 --> 00:01:07,197
♪ Would you resist temptation? ♪
23
00:01:07,371 --> 00:01:08,677
♪ No, you would not! ♪
24
00:01:08,851 --> 00:01:10,679
♪ Just admit it sometimes ♪
25
00:01:10,853 --> 00:01:15,597
♪ Mean is what you are
Mean is easier than nice ♪
26
00:01:15,771 --> 00:01:18,600
♪ And though mean
Can take you far ♪
27
00:01:18,774 --> 00:01:21,907
♪ Maybe this will
Make you think twice ♪
28
00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:23,953
Spin. Clicker. Fosse!
29
00:01:24,127 --> 00:01:27,522
♪ This is a cautionary tale ♪
30
00:01:28,740 --> 00:01:30,960
♪ About corruption
And betrayal ♪
31
00:01:31,134 --> 00:01:33,484
♪ And getting hit by a bus! ♪
32
00:01:33,658 --> 00:01:36,661
♪ You can'’t buy integrity ♪
33
00:01:36,835 --> 00:01:41,666
♪ At the mall
It'’s not for sale ♪
34
00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:42,885
Truth.
35
00:01:43,059 --> 00:01:46,584
♪ This is a cautionary ♪
36
00:01:46,758 --> 00:01:52,851
♪ Tale! ♪
37
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:11,609
♪ I used
To think I would spend ♪
38
00:02:11,783 --> 00:02:14,438
♪ Every second I have ♪
39
00:02:15,439 --> 00:02:17,876
♪ Right where my story began ♪
40
00:02:20,183 --> 00:02:21,750
♪ I'’d be happy here ♪
41
00:02:21,924 --> 00:02:24,622
♪ Every day, month
Year of my life ♪
42
00:02:24,796 --> 00:02:28,757
♪ But now I'’m wishing
For whatever comes
After goodbye ♪
43
00:02:29,801 --> 00:02:32,543
♪ On every star in the sky ♪
44
00:02:34,806 --> 00:02:38,984
♪ And I'’m dreaming of
What I could become ♪
45
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:42,249
♪ This is where home will be ♪
46
00:02:42,423 --> 00:02:45,817
♪ As long as my lungs
Can breathe ♪
47
00:02:45,991 --> 00:02:49,647
♪ But my heart is dyin'’
To leave ♪
48
00:02:49,821 --> 00:02:52,346
♪ '’Cause I know there'’s more
To me ♪
49
00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:54,609
♪ I don'’t want to live with
What ifs...♪
50
00:02:54,783 --> 00:02:56,088
Cady?
51
00:02:56,263 --> 00:02:58,003
I'’ve been thinking
about what you said.
52
00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,876
About being frustrated
by my decision
53
00:03:01,050 --> 00:03:02,486
and feeling
a little stuck here,
54
00:03:02,660 --> 00:03:03,748
just me and you.
55
00:03:03,922 --> 00:03:05,097
I'’m sorry I yelled.
56
00:03:05,272 --> 00:03:07,317
But you have a point.
57
00:03:07,491 --> 00:03:08,710
Maybe I'’ve been
a little selfish,
58
00:03:08,884 --> 00:03:10,320
putting my research ahead
59
00:03:10,494 --> 00:03:12,366
of your social
and emotional development.
60
00:03:12,540 --> 00:03:14,368
I called the people
from Northwestern back.
61
00:03:14,542 --> 00:03:15,717
I took the job.
62
00:03:16,631 --> 00:03:17,849
What?
63
00:03:18,023 --> 00:03:19,764
But they need me
to start on September 9th.
64
00:03:19,938 --> 00:03:23,333
♪ I don'’t want to live
With what ifs, might haves ♪
65
00:03:23,507 --> 00:03:26,989
♪ Could have been if I had ♪ Cady?
66
00:03:27,163 --> 00:03:31,472
♪ Only tried, not held back
Oh, no ♪
67
00:03:31,646 --> 00:03:33,648
♪ That'’s not a part of my plan ♪
68
00:03:33,822 --> 00:03:36,955
♪ That'’s not the me that I
That'’s not the me that I am ♪
69
00:03:37,129 --> 00:03:39,523
♪ This time
There'’s no lookin'’ back ♪
70
00:03:40,916 --> 00:03:44,485
♪ I'’m crossing things
Off my list ♪
71
00:03:44,659 --> 00:03:48,228
♪ Don'’t want to run out of time
Before I wake up and find ♪
72
00:03:48,402 --> 00:03:50,621
♪ There was a life
That I missed ♪
73
00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:54,451
♪ My limit doesn'’t exist ♪
74
00:04:04,592 --> 00:04:06,071
I'’ll pick you up at 3:00.
75
00:04:12,295 --> 00:04:16,125
♪ I don'’t want to live
With what ifs, might haves ♪
76
00:04:16,299 --> 00:04:19,868
♪ Could have been if I had ♪
77
00:04:20,042 --> 00:04:24,176
♪ Only tried, not held back
Oh, no ♪
78
00:04:24,351 --> 00:04:27,310
♪ That'’s not a part of my plan
That'’s not the me that I am ♪
79
00:04:27,484 --> 00:04:30,574
♪ No what ifs, regrets ♪
80
00:04:30,748 --> 00:04:34,230
♪ Wear my strengths
And weakness ♪
81
00:04:34,404 --> 00:04:38,713
♪ I won'’t hide my feelings
Oh, no ♪
82
00:04:38,887 --> 00:04:41,629
♪ That'’s not a part of my plan
That'’s not the...♪
83
00:04:41,803 --> 00:04:43,587
Bitch, move.
84
00:04:53,162 --> 00:04:54,555
Hope you all
had a good summer.
85
00:04:54,729 --> 00:04:56,034
Mine was pretty good.
86
00:04:56,208 --> 00:04:58,472
I worked
in my brother-in-law'’s
87
00:04:58,646 --> 00:05:00,300
golf pro shop.
88
00:05:00,474 --> 00:05:03,215
Did not make a lot of money,
so of course I am back
89
00:05:03,390 --> 00:05:06,044
to help shepherd you all
into the future.
90
00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:13,617
May I have everyone'’s
attention, please?
91
00:05:13,791 --> 00:05:16,141
Eyes to the front of the room.
92
00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:19,275
You may notice
we have a new student
joining us today.
93
00:05:19,449 --> 00:05:20,755
She just moved here
from Kentucky.
94
00:05:20,929 --> 00:05:21,886
Kenya.
95
00:05:22,060 --> 00:05:24,324
Kenya. Her name is Caddy.
96
00:05:24,498 --> 00:05:26,282
It'’s Cady. Cady Heron.
97
00:05:26,456 --> 00:05:28,806
My apologies.
I will commit that to memory.
98
00:05:28,980 --> 00:05:32,723
Cady, like the Canadian
songstress k.d. lang,
99
00:05:32,897 --> 00:05:36,161
and Heron,
like the illegal street drug.
100
00:05:37,162 --> 00:05:38,990
- Thank you, Caddy.
- It'’s Cady.
101
00:05:39,164 --> 00:05:41,732
Cady, hi. I'’m Ms. Norbury.
I'’ll be your homeroom teacher.
102
00:05:41,906 --> 00:05:43,168
This is your roster.
103
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:44,953
I see I also have you
for A.P. Calculus.
104
00:05:45,127 --> 00:05:47,172
You must have had excellent
teachers at your old school.
105
00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:48,957
- Oh, I was homeschooled.
- Homeschooled?
106
00:05:49,131 --> 00:05:51,699
Oh, that'’s a fun way
to take jobs from my union.
107
00:05:51,873 --> 00:05:53,265
- No, I'’m joking. It'’s fine.
- Ah.
108
00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:55,224
Um, do you think you can
follow this schedule?
109
00:05:55,398 --> 00:05:56,965
- Yeah, I think so.
- Okay, you'’re gonna be moving
110
00:05:57,139 --> 00:05:58,619
from class to class
with each...
111
00:06:00,447 --> 00:06:01,273
That'’s it.
112
00:06:02,231 --> 00:06:03,537
Everybody find a seat.
113
00:06:04,233 --> 00:06:05,103
Please.
114
00:06:09,064 --> 00:06:10,892
This is first period:
115
00:06:11,066 --> 00:06:12,676
American Literature.
116
00:06:12,850 --> 00:06:14,374
♪ My name is Mister Rapp ♪
117
00:06:14,548 --> 00:06:16,637
♪ And I take no...? ♪
118
00:06:18,769 --> 00:06:21,206
♪ My name is Mister Rapp
And I take no...?♪
119
00:06:21,990 --> 00:06:23,295
"...care of myself"?
120
00:06:23,470 --> 00:06:27,996
"Crap."
Correct answer was "crap."
121
00:06:29,301 --> 00:06:30,564
Find a seat.
122
00:06:30,738 --> 00:06:32,304
I don'’t want you
to think of me
123
00:06:32,479 --> 00:06:33,915
as just any other teacher.
124
00:06:34,089 --> 00:06:35,482
I prefer to think of myself
125
00:06:35,656 --> 00:06:37,484
as a time traveler.
126
00:06:37,658 --> 00:06:41,096
Maintenant nous choisissons
nos noms français.
127
00:06:41,966 --> 00:06:43,577
Cady. Comment tu t'’appelles?
128
00:06:43,751 --> 00:06:45,753
Je m'’appelle Cady. Incorrecte!
129
00:06:45,927 --> 00:06:48,277
You have to pick
a French name.
130
00:06:48,451 --> 00:06:49,670
All the French people I know
131
00:06:49,844 --> 00:06:51,933
just call me Cady.
132
00:06:52,107 --> 00:06:53,674
Just say Marie.
133
00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:56,372
Um... Marie?
134
00:06:56,546 --> 00:06:58,113
Marie.
135
00:06:58,287 --> 00:07:00,594
- J'’anice.
- J'’anice.
136
00:07:00,768 --> 00:07:03,205
Chanel. Non.
137
00:07:03,379 --> 00:07:04,772
Fantine. Non.
138
00:07:04,946 --> 00:07:06,034
Celine Dion?
139
00:07:06,208 --> 00:07:07,209
Non.
140
00:07:07,818 --> 00:07:09,037
Beyoncé.
141
00:07:09,211 --> 00:07:10,952
Quais. Mais non.
142
00:07:13,084 --> 00:07:15,696
Welcome to "Health
and Human Sexuality."
143
00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:18,133
Now, this fall
we'’ll be getting
144
00:07:18,307 --> 00:07:21,484
into the state-mandated unit
on Abstinence.
145
00:07:21,658 --> 00:07:23,051
Of course then followed by,
in the spring,
146
00:07:23,225 --> 00:07:25,140
Condoms and Choking.
147
00:07:25,314 --> 00:07:27,708
Where do you think
you'’re going there, hotshot?
148
00:07:27,882 --> 00:07:29,405
I need to urinate.
149
00:07:29,579 --> 00:07:30,711
No way, José.
150
00:07:30,885 --> 00:07:32,277
Uh, it'’s Cady.
151
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:33,714
Well, Cady,
152
00:07:33,888 --> 00:07:35,803
first thing you need to do
is ask permission.
153
00:07:35,977 --> 00:07:37,369
But the second thing
you'’ll need
154
00:07:37,544 --> 00:07:39,546
is this lavatory pass
155
00:07:39,720 --> 00:07:41,548
that is shaped
like a sperm whale.
156
00:07:41,722 --> 00:07:42,723
Get it?
157
00:07:43,332 --> 00:07:44,594
Um...
158
00:07:44,768 --> 00:07:46,683
May I please have
the lavatory pass?
159
00:07:46,857 --> 00:07:48,990
No, you may not.
You may go sit back down.
160
00:07:49,164 --> 00:07:51,775
You can go at lunch.
Nice try, kiddo.
161
00:07:51,949 --> 00:07:53,342
All right,
let'’s jump into this!
162
00:07:53,516 --> 00:07:55,605
This won'’t be awkward at all,
I swear to God.
163
00:08:41,782 --> 00:08:43,392
This one.
164
00:08:46,003 --> 00:08:48,179
Are you okay in there?
165
00:08:48,353 --> 00:08:49,877
Uh, yes.
166
00:08:50,051 --> 00:08:51,487
'’Cause you'’ve been in there
a very long time.
167
00:08:51,661 --> 00:08:52,880
We'’re concerned
you'’re either doing drugs
168
00:08:53,054 --> 00:08:54,229
or having a toilet baby.
169
00:08:57,058 --> 00:08:58,625
Hi. I'’m Janis.
170
00:08:58,799 --> 00:09:00,235
And je m'’appelle Sasha Fierce.
171
00:09:00,409 --> 00:09:01,497
This is Damian.
172
00:09:01,671 --> 00:09:02,977
He is almost too gay
to function.
173
00:09:03,151 --> 00:09:05,240
But I push through.
I manage.
174
00:09:05,414 --> 00:09:06,763
Hi.
175
00:09:06,937 --> 00:09:07,851
We'’ve been
watching you all day.
176
00:09:08,025 --> 00:09:09,374
You'’re a mess.
177
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:13,640
So we volunteer to amplify
your lunch experience.
178
00:09:13,814 --> 00:09:16,643
Yeah, what Damian is saying is
we will help you, Caddy.
179
00:09:16,817 --> 00:09:20,690
Thanks so much.
Um... it'’s Cady.
180
00:09:20,864 --> 00:09:22,736
Yeah.
I'’m gonna call you Caddy.
181
00:09:23,650 --> 00:09:24,738
Get out of the toilet!
182
00:09:24,912 --> 00:09:26,522
Mkay.
183
00:09:26,696 --> 00:09:29,394
You just need to find
your clique and commit to it.
184
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:30,961
You have your Jocks.
185
00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:35,487
Your Corny Horny Band Freaks.
186
00:09:38,969 --> 00:09:40,144
Your Classic Burnouts.
187
00:09:42,190 --> 00:09:43,321
Do any of these feel
like your people?
188
00:09:43,495 --> 00:09:45,280
I don'’t think so. Hmm...
189
00:09:45,454 --> 00:09:47,282
You know what might
be cute for her?
190
00:09:47,456 --> 00:09:48,675
What, Grade Grubbers?
191
00:09:48,849 --> 00:09:50,590
No, I was gonna say
Theater Mess.
192
00:09:56,639 --> 00:09:58,423
And who'’s at that table?
193
00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:00,817
Oh, no, no, no.
194
00:10:00,991 --> 00:10:02,427
We call them The Plastics
195
00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:04,168
'’cause they'’re shiny,
fake and hard.
196
00:10:04,342 --> 00:10:05,735
Yeah, that'’s Gretchen Wieners.
197
00:10:05,909 --> 00:10:08,042
She knows everything
about everybody.
198
00:10:08,216 --> 00:10:09,739
That'’s why
her hair'’s so big.
199
00:10:09,913 --> 00:10:11,436
It'’s full of secrets.
200
00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:13,003
And that'’s Karen Shetty.
201
00:10:13,177 --> 00:10:14,788
She'’s the dumbest person
you'’ll ever meet.
202
00:10:14,962 --> 00:10:18,052
I once saw her put a D
in the word "orange."
203
00:10:20,924 --> 00:10:23,057
Could I just sit
with you guys?
204
00:10:23,927 --> 00:10:25,320
I actually don'’t know.
205
00:10:25,494 --> 00:10:26,669
We'’ve never been asked
that question before.
206
00:10:26,843 --> 00:10:27,888
Could she?
207
00:10:28,062 --> 00:10:30,194
We are very exclusive,
208
00:10:30,368 --> 00:10:33,633
but I think we can make
an exception.
209
00:10:36,070 --> 00:10:38,072
- What was that?
- Oh, Lord, it'’s the Queen Bee.
Don'’t look her in the eye!
210
00:10:51,389 --> 00:10:56,090
♪ My name is Regina George ♪
211
00:10:57,221 --> 00:11:02,139
♪ And I am a massive deal ♪
212
00:11:03,010 --> 00:11:05,577
♪ Fear me, love me ♪
213
00:11:05,752 --> 00:11:09,277
♪ Stand and stare at me ♪
214
00:11:09,451 --> 00:11:11,540
♪ And these? ♪
215
00:11:11,714 --> 00:11:13,585
♪ These are real ♪
216
00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:17,154
♪ I'’ve got money and looks ♪
217
00:11:18,939 --> 00:11:23,247
♪ I am, like, drunk with power ♪
218
00:11:23,421 --> 00:11:28,818
♪ This whole school
Humps my leg ♪
219
00:11:28,992 --> 00:11:32,474
♪ Like a Chihuahua ♪
220
00:11:32,648 --> 00:11:37,784
♪ I'’m the prettiest poison
You'’ve ever seen ♪
221
00:11:37,958 --> 00:11:42,919
♪ That filter you use
Looks just like me ♪
222
00:11:43,093 --> 00:11:47,794
♪ My name is Regina George ♪
223
00:11:47,968 --> 00:11:52,755
♪ And I am a massive deal ♪
224
00:11:52,929 --> 00:11:57,586
♪ I don'’t care who you are ♪
225
00:11:57,760 --> 00:12:00,154
♪ I don'’t care ♪
226
00:12:00,328 --> 00:12:07,117
♪ How you feel ♪
227
00:12:07,291 --> 00:12:08,423
You.
228
00:12:08,597 --> 00:12:10,120
Yeah, you. Come here.
229
00:12:19,303 --> 00:12:20,565
Why don'’t I know you?
230
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:23,438
I'’m new. I just moved here
from Kenya.
231
00:12:23,612 --> 00:12:24,961
Shut up.
232
00:12:25,657 --> 00:12:26,702
Shut up!
233
00:12:26,876 --> 00:12:28,530
I didn'’t say anything.
234
00:12:28,704 --> 00:12:29,966
You'’re, like, really pretty.
235
00:12:31,402 --> 00:12:33,361
- Thanks.
- So you agree?
236
00:12:33,535 --> 00:12:34,710
You think
you'’re really pretty?
237
00:12:36,059 --> 00:12:37,539
Oh, I don'’t know.
238
00:12:37,713 --> 00:12:40,629
You'’re an international
student. That is so fetch.
239
00:12:40,803 --> 00:12:41,935
What is "fetch"?
240
00:12:42,109 --> 00:12:44,851
It'’s like slang
from an old movie.
241
00:12:45,025 --> 00:12:48,028
Juno, I think.
242
00:12:48,202 --> 00:12:49,507
Have you ever touched a tiger?
243
00:12:49,681 --> 00:12:52,032
Uh, no, those aren'’t
indigenous to Kenya.
244
00:12:52,206 --> 00:12:54,556
'’Cause that'’s one
of my life goals.
245
00:12:54,730 --> 00:12:57,080
To not touch a tiger.
246
00:12:57,254 --> 00:12:59,213
Hey, new girl!
You want to see a trick?
247
00:12:59,387 --> 00:13:00,823
I can guess
any girl'’s bra size.
248
00:13:00,997 --> 00:13:02,694
All you got to do
is jump one time.
249
00:13:02,869 --> 00:13:04,871
- Ew, Jason!
- Do me.
250
00:13:05,045 --> 00:13:06,481
Oh, my God, Jason.
251
00:13:06,655 --> 00:13:09,527
You do not come to a party
at my house with Gretchen
252
00:13:09,701 --> 00:13:11,355
and then skeeze on the new girl
right in front of me.
253
00:13:11,529 --> 00:13:13,401
Do you want to have sex
with him?
254
00:13:13,575 --> 00:13:15,664
Oh, uh... no, thank you.
255
00:13:15,838 --> 00:13:16,970
Okay, then it'’s settled.
256
00:13:17,144 --> 00:13:18,319
Jason, no one thinks
you'’re funny.
257
00:13:18,493 --> 00:13:19,668
Okay? And this thing
you'’re doing
258
00:13:19,842 --> 00:13:20,974
where you lower your voice
when you talk
259
00:13:21,148 --> 00:13:22,410
is making people really sad.
260
00:13:22,584 --> 00:13:24,412
Excuse me, anyone
who would like Jason Weems
261
00:13:24,586 --> 00:13:26,414
to go back
to his normal speaking voice,
262
00:13:26,588 --> 00:13:27,458
please raise your hand.
263
00:13:31,854 --> 00:13:32,986
Yeah.
264
00:13:33,638 --> 00:13:34,857
Bitch.
265
00:13:35,031 --> 00:13:36,467
Wow.
266
00:13:36,641 --> 00:13:38,513
You'’re really gonna
get noticed around here.
267
00:13:39,383 --> 00:13:40,558
We should help you.
268
00:13:42,517 --> 00:13:44,171
Can you give us some privacy
for a sec?
269
00:13:44,345 --> 00:13:46,347
Oh. Yeah, sure.
270
00:13:50,046 --> 00:13:52,135
I have your lunch!
271
00:13:53,397 --> 00:13:55,312
All right.
272
00:13:55,486 --> 00:13:57,445
So, we never really
do this, but...
273
00:13:57,619 --> 00:13:58,881
...you'’re invited
to eat lunch with us
274
00:13:59,055 --> 00:14:01,188
- for the rest of the week.
- Oh. Um...
275
00:14:01,362 --> 00:14:03,538
- That'’s okay.
- On Wednesdays,
we wear pink.
276
00:14:06,715 --> 00:14:08,499
They want me to have lunch
with them all week.
277
00:14:08,673 --> 00:14:10,284
That is tits!
278
00:14:10,458 --> 00:14:11,938
She means "that'’s great."
279
00:14:12,112 --> 00:14:13,983
I don'’t really get why
you guys hate them so much.
280
00:14:14,157 --> 00:14:16,029
- Regina seems kind of cool.
- No, no...
281
00:14:16,203 --> 00:14:17,769
Regina George is not cool.
282
00:14:17,944 --> 00:14:19,641
She'’s a scum-sucking
life ruiner.
283
00:14:19,815 --> 00:14:22,252
Janis hates Regina
because when we were
in sixth grade,
284
00:14:22,426 --> 00:14:24,385
she told everybody
that she was--Hey, Damian!
285
00:14:24,559 --> 00:14:25,473
What?
286
00:14:25,647 --> 00:14:26,691
Shall we not?
287
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:28,084
I am providing context.
288
00:14:28,258 --> 00:14:29,259
Caddy?
289
00:14:29,433 --> 00:14:31,044
You should have lunch
with them
290
00:14:31,218 --> 00:14:32,959
and then report back
and tell us
291
00:14:33,133 --> 00:14:35,135
every stupid, moronic thing
they said.
292
00:14:35,309 --> 00:14:37,528
Spy on them? That'’s bad.
293
00:14:37,702 --> 00:14:39,095
No! Look at us.
294
00:14:40,444 --> 00:14:42,882
Would we ever ask you
to do something bad?
295
00:14:43,056 --> 00:14:44,666
Uh...
296
00:14:47,321 --> 00:14:48,888
- Okay.
- Yes!
297
00:14:49,062 --> 00:14:50,890
Do you have a pink shirt
I can borrow?
298
00:14:51,064 --> 00:14:53,066
- No!
- Yes! What shade?
299
00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:55,459
Welcome to A.P. Calculus.
300
00:14:55,633 --> 00:15:00,682
Congratulations.
You know more math
than 85% of Americans.
301
00:15:00,856 --> 00:15:03,728
But you will not rest
on your laurels this year.
302
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:06,166
I plan to push you.
303
00:15:06,340 --> 00:15:07,558
So let'’s get started.
304
00:15:07,732 --> 00:15:10,735
Chapter One, "Limits
and Their Properties."
305
00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:12,215
What the heck are limits,
you say?
306
00:15:12,389 --> 00:15:13,782
If I write out the equation,
307
00:15:13,956 --> 00:15:16,828
"The limit as x approaches two
of ,"
308
00:15:17,003 --> 00:15:18,700
the function is what
we'’re taking the limit of.
309
00:15:18,874 --> 00:15:20,571
I don'’t expect you to know
how to do this yet.
310
00:15:20,745 --> 00:15:21,921
The limit equals three.
311
00:15:22,573 --> 00:15:23,966
That'’s right.
312
00:15:24,140 --> 00:15:25,446
Let'’s try another one.
313
00:15:25,620 --> 00:15:27,274
Find the value of k
314
00:15:27,448 --> 00:15:29,493
for which the following
limit exists.
315
00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:31,887
- K equals negative three.
- Damn, girl!
316
00:15:33,671 --> 00:15:34,934
Wow.
317
00:15:36,239 --> 00:15:38,676
Are you trying to make
the rest of us feel dumb?
318
00:15:38,850 --> 00:15:41,897
No, I... I'’m not trying to.
It'’s just, uh, happening.
319
00:15:42,071 --> 00:15:45,857
Oh, okay, it'’s like that.
All right, um, well...
320
00:15:46,902 --> 00:15:48,251
challenge accepted.
321
00:15:55,998 --> 00:15:57,869
♪ When I was nine ♪
322
00:15:58,044 --> 00:15:59,480
♪ I fell in love ♪
323
00:15:59,654 --> 00:16:01,308
♪ This Peace Corps guy ♪
324
00:16:02,918 --> 00:16:05,703
♪ I waited hours
Inside his tent with flowers ♪
325
00:16:05,877 --> 00:16:08,228
♪ Which made him laugh
Which made me cry ♪
326
00:16:08,402 --> 00:16:09,925
♪ By 13 I gave up trying ♪
327
00:16:10,099 --> 00:16:13,015
♪ I decided I would be
A mathematician ♪
328
00:16:13,189 --> 00:16:14,669
♪ '’Cause math is real ♪
329
00:16:14,843 --> 00:16:16,627
♪ I memorized a lot of pi ♪
330
00:16:16,801 --> 00:16:19,282
♪ Because addition
And subtraction and division ♪
331
00:16:19,456 --> 00:16:22,764
♪ Would never make me feel
So stupid with love ♪
332
00:16:22,938 --> 00:16:24,157
♪ I didn'’t get it ♪
333
00:16:24,331 --> 00:16:27,334
♪ I didn'’t get it, somehow ♪
334
00:16:27,508 --> 00:16:30,424
♪ Smart with math
But stupid with love ♪
335
00:16:30,598 --> 00:16:34,428
♪ I didn'’t get it
I didn'’t get it till now ♪
336
00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:38,432
♪ Mm, mm, mm ♪
337
00:16:40,086 --> 00:16:42,610
♪ So thank you, math
For being there ♪
338
00:16:42,784 --> 00:16:44,829
♪ To bring me joy ♪
339
00:16:46,135 --> 00:16:47,919
♪ And thank you, math ♪
340
00:16:48,094 --> 00:16:51,097
♪ '’Cause now you'’ve brought me
This cute boy ♪
341
00:16:51,271 --> 00:16:53,403
♪ He'’s like someone from TV ♪
342
00:16:53,577 --> 00:16:56,450
♪ He'’s like that guy
Who gives out roses
To those women ♪
343
00:16:56,624 --> 00:16:58,234
♪ His clothes, his grooming ♪
344
00:16:58,408 --> 00:17:00,367
♪ And he'’s a foot away from me ♪
345
00:17:00,541 --> 00:17:02,717
♪ With swoopy hair
And shiny eyes
That I could swim in ♪
346
00:17:02,891 --> 00:17:04,240
♪ He'’s live and in the room! ♪
347
00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:14,511
♪ And I'’m stupid with love
I want to get it ♪
348
00:17:14,685 --> 00:17:17,645
♪ I want to get it, but how? ♪
349
00:17:17,819 --> 00:17:20,952
♪ Smart with math
But stupid with love ♪
350
00:17:21,127 --> 00:17:25,218
♪ I want to get it
I didn'’t get it till now ♪
351
00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:37,056
♪ I'’m astounded and nonplussed ♪
352
00:17:37,230 --> 00:17:40,015
♪ I am filled with calcu-lust ♪
353
00:17:40,189 --> 00:17:43,192
♪ Does this guy work out?
He must ♪
354
00:17:43,366 --> 00:17:46,326
♪ All sweaty at the gym ♪
355
00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:49,416
♪ Could that image
Be more hot?♪
356
00:17:49,590 --> 00:17:52,419
♪ Let me just enjoy
That thought ♪
357
00:17:52,593 --> 00:17:55,378
♪ School was rough
But now it'’s not ♪
358
00:17:55,552 --> 00:17:57,685
♪ '’Cause now there'’s him ♪
359
00:17:57,859 --> 00:18:01,167
♪ Stupid with love
I didn'’t get it ♪
360
00:18:01,341 --> 00:18:04,300
♪ I didn'’t get it, somehow ♪
361
00:18:04,474 --> 00:18:07,390
♪ Smart with math
But stupid with love ♪
362
00:18:07,564 --> 00:18:10,741
♪ I didn'’t get it
I didn'’t get it till now ♪
363
00:18:17,487 --> 00:18:18,314
I'’m okay.
364
00:18:24,625 --> 00:18:27,193
Mom, you can'’t
pick me up like this.
365
00:18:27,367 --> 00:18:28,542
It'’s embarrassing.
366
00:18:31,545 --> 00:18:33,155
You can'’t wear a tank top
two days in a row
367
00:18:33,329 --> 00:18:36,332
and you can
only wear your hair
in a ponytail once a week.
368
00:18:36,506 --> 00:18:37,986
So I guess
you'’ve chosen today.
369
00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:41,990
Oh! And we only wear sweats
or track pants on Fridays.
370
00:18:42,164 --> 00:18:43,818
If you break any
of these rules,
371
00:18:43,992 --> 00:18:45,124
you can'’t sit with us.
372
00:18:45,298 --> 00:18:46,995
I mean, not just you,
like, any of us.
373
00:18:47,169 --> 00:18:48,649
Like if I wore sweatpants today,
374
00:18:48,823 --> 00:18:50,085
I'’d have to
go sit over there...
375
00:18:50,259 --> 00:18:51,826
...with the Art Freaks.
376
00:18:54,611 --> 00:18:56,004
That seems fair.
377
00:18:56,178 --> 00:18:58,528
120 calories
and 48 calories from fat.
378
00:18:58,702 --> 00:18:59,616
What percent is that?
379
00:18:59,790 --> 00:19:02,053
Um, 48 into 120?
380
00:19:02,228 --> 00:19:03,925
There'’s no way of knowing.
381
00:19:04,795 --> 00:19:06,362
It'’s 40%.
382
00:19:06,536 --> 00:19:07,929
42 over 120
383
00:19:08,103 --> 00:19:10,018
equals x over 100,
and then you cross-multiply
384
00:19:10,192 --> 00:19:11,672
to get the value of x.
385
00:19:12,368 --> 00:19:14,153
Hmm.
386
00:19:14,327 --> 00:19:15,980
Whatever.
Um, I'’m getting cheese fries.
387
00:19:22,291 --> 00:19:24,989
So, have you seen any guys
you think are cute yet?
388
00:19:26,687 --> 00:19:30,691
Oh, um, well, actually,
there'’s this one guy
in my Calculus class.
389
00:19:30,865 --> 00:19:34,782
- Ooh, a senior! Who is it?
- Uh, Aaron Samuels.
390
00:19:34,956 --> 00:19:38,002
You can'’t like Aaron Samuels!
- That is Regina'’s ex-boyfriend!
- No. No. Bad. Bad. Danger.
391
00:19:39,526 --> 00:19:42,093
Wait. I thought she
dumped him for Shane Oman.
392
00:19:42,268 --> 00:19:43,486
Irregardless!
393
00:19:43,660 --> 00:19:44,966
Ex-boyfriends are
off-limits for friends.
394
00:19:45,140 --> 00:19:46,707
That'’s just, like,
the rules of feminism!
395
00:19:50,972 --> 00:19:52,147
Don'’t worry.
396
00:19:52,321 --> 00:19:54,584
I will never tell Regina
what you said.
397
00:19:54,758 --> 00:19:56,499
I am very trustworthy.
398
00:19:56,673 --> 00:19:58,980
Karen'’s had sex with 11 people
and I'’ve never told anyone.
399
00:20:00,634 --> 00:20:01,678
Yo, Golf Bird.
400
00:20:01,852 --> 00:20:03,941
- Those fractions were tight.
- What?
401
00:20:04,115 --> 00:20:07,249
"Caddy Heron." "Golf Bird."
402
00:20:07,423 --> 00:20:08,946
- I don'’t like it.
- I don'’t get it.
403
00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:12,036
I'’m Kevin Ganatra.
I'’m from your Calc class.
404
00:20:13,212 --> 00:20:14,909
I sit diagonally from you.
405
00:20:15,083 --> 00:20:17,128
I'’m also captain
of the North Shore Mathletes.
406
00:20:17,303 --> 00:20:21,045
We'’re a very chill, dope,
extracurricular option.
407
00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:22,612
You know,
serve your college rezzy
408
00:20:22,786 --> 00:20:24,745
- and your thirst for knolly.
- Don'’t say "knolly."
409
00:20:24,919 --> 00:20:26,921
Also Ms. Norbury says
we get twice as much funding
410
00:20:27,095 --> 00:20:29,184
if we had a girl on the team,
so think about joining,
411
00:20:29,358 --> 00:20:30,925
because we'’d love
to get jackets.
412
00:20:31,099 --> 00:20:32,840
Okay, yeah, sure.
Where do I...
413
00:20:33,014 --> 00:20:34,058
No, no,
you cannot join Mathletes.
414
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:35,321
That is, like,
socially ruinous!
415
00:20:35,495 --> 00:20:38,237
Ew, no.
Why is he by our table?
416
00:20:38,411 --> 00:20:39,760
I can hear you, by the way.
417
00:20:39,934 --> 00:20:41,327
Can you hear me now?
418
00:20:41,501 --> 00:20:43,851
Bye.
419
00:20:44,025 --> 00:20:47,158
Uh, anyways,
uh, just take my card
in case you change your mind?
420
00:20:53,817 --> 00:20:56,385
God, you are so lucky
you have us to guide you.
421
00:20:56,559 --> 00:20:58,605
What are you doing
after school today?
422
00:20:58,779 --> 00:21:00,346
I want to give you some shoes.
423
00:21:03,087 --> 00:21:04,698
What kind of shoes?
424
00:21:04,872 --> 00:21:07,440
I have no idea. I guess, um,
something fancier than these?
425
00:21:08,005 --> 00:21:09,920
She'’s so rude!
426
00:21:10,094 --> 00:21:12,532
I mean, maybe
she'’s just being generous.
427
00:21:12,706 --> 00:21:14,751
Maybe we can have
a commensal relationship.
428
00:21:14,925 --> 00:21:17,101
What is that? I want one.
429
00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:20,844
So, in nature,
okay, so lions,
430
00:21:21,018 --> 00:21:22,716
they'’re the apex predators, right?
431
00:21:22,890 --> 00:21:23,891
They'’re the top
of the food chain.
432
00:21:24,065 --> 00:21:26,241
They can kill anything
they want.
433
00:21:26,415 --> 00:21:28,504
But if you'’re a hyena, well,
434
00:21:28,678 --> 00:21:31,551
then you follow them around
and you eat the carcasses
that they leave behind.
435
00:21:31,725 --> 00:21:33,204
- Whoa.
- Gretchen Wieners is a hyena.
436
00:21:33,379 --> 00:21:34,293
Got it.
437
00:21:34,467 --> 00:21:36,338
No, I did not say that.
438
00:21:36,512 --> 00:21:38,558
I'’m just saying, if you'’re
on Regina'’s good side...
439
00:21:38,732 --> 00:21:40,037
Whoa, Caddy! No, no, no.
440
00:21:40,211 --> 00:21:42,257
Regina George does not have
a good side, okay?
441
00:21:42,431 --> 00:21:43,824
If you go over
to her house today...
442
00:21:43,998 --> 00:21:45,216
I am not joking,
443
00:21:46,130 --> 00:21:47,610
be careful.
444
00:21:58,534 --> 00:22:00,362
♪ Don'’t be fooled by the pink ♪
445
00:22:00,536 --> 00:22:02,408
♪ She is not playing dolls ♪
446
00:22:02,582 --> 00:22:06,368
♪ She is stalking the halls
For the thrill of the kill ♪
447
00:22:06,542 --> 00:22:10,372
♪ Every person in school
Is aware of her stare ♪
448
00:22:10,546 --> 00:22:14,376
♪ When she tosses her hair
They go perfectly still ♪
449
00:22:14,550 --> 00:22:18,380
♪ All their eyes say
"Don'’t attack me"♪
450
00:22:18,554 --> 00:22:22,384
♪ Watch them sweat
And pant and shake ♪
451
00:22:22,558 --> 00:22:26,736
♪ Every food chain
Has its acme ♪
452
00:22:26,910 --> 00:22:29,826
♪ Regina George eats steak ♪
453
00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:34,527
♪ She'’s the queen of beasts
She can smell your fear ♪
454
00:22:34,701 --> 00:22:38,357
♪ In this biosphere
She'’s the apex predator ♪
455
00:22:38,531 --> 00:22:40,446
♪ Like a lioness ♪
456
00:22:40,620 --> 00:22:44,188
♪ Only with less fur
Do not mess with her ♪
457
00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:46,190
♪ She'’s the apex predator ♪
458
00:22:48,932 --> 00:22:51,413
Jason is crotch-sitting
Taylor Wedell.
459
00:22:52,458 --> 00:22:54,329
Absolutely not.
460
00:22:54,503 --> 00:22:56,287
♪ At the watering hole ♪
461
00:22:56,462 --> 00:22:58,115
♪ See the girls
Who weren'’t nice ♪
462
00:22:58,289 --> 00:23:00,291
♪ Have to scatter like mice ♪
463
00:23:00,466 --> 00:23:02,598
♪ From a jungle cat ♪
464
00:23:02,772 --> 00:23:06,254
♪ And though Janis is great
She does not have this power ♪
465
00:23:06,428 --> 00:23:08,517
♪ People literally cower ♪
466
00:23:08,691 --> 00:23:10,171
♪ Janis can'’t do that ♪
467
00:23:10,345 --> 00:23:14,436
♪ See her mark her territory ♪
468
00:23:14,610 --> 00:23:17,439
♪ As they follow in her train ♪
469
00:23:18,788 --> 00:23:22,836
♪ They were victims
In their stories ♪
470
00:23:23,010 --> 00:23:26,405
♪ Now they shake their mane ♪
471
00:23:26,579 --> 00:23:30,147
♪ She'’s the queen of beasts
And you'’re in her pride ♪
472
00:23:30,321 --> 00:23:32,236
♪ You have hitched a ride ♪
473
00:23:32,411 --> 00:23:34,543
♪ With the apex predator ♪
474
00:23:34,717 --> 00:23:38,547
♪ And it'’s kind of fun
When she bares her claws ♪
475
00:23:38,721 --> 00:23:40,331
♪ You think
You'’re safe because ♪
476
00:23:40,506 --> 00:23:42,072
♪ You'’re with
The apex predator ♪
477
00:23:42,246 --> 00:23:44,335
Do you think she'’ll be mad
if I like Aaron?
478
00:23:44,510 --> 00:23:46,642
- Samuels? Are you unwell?
- You can'’t like
Aaron Samuels!
479
00:23:46,816 --> 00:23:47,730
Okay, okay!
480
00:23:47,904 --> 00:23:49,863
I'’ll be careful. I promise.
481
00:23:52,648 --> 00:23:56,130
♪ Do not think
You'’ll be protected ♪
482
00:23:56,304 --> 00:24:00,003
♪ By your new exotic pet ♪
483
00:24:00,177 --> 00:24:04,399
♪ Not a chance
If she suspected ♪
484
00:24:04,573 --> 00:24:07,881
♪ You were any kind
Of reproductive threat ♪
485
00:24:08,055 --> 00:24:09,970
♪ But she doesn'’t know yet ♪
486
00:24:10,144 --> 00:24:12,363
♪ She doesn'’t know yet! ♪
487
00:24:12,538 --> 00:24:16,455
♪ She'’s the queen of beasts
At this beastly school ♪
488
00:24:16,629 --> 00:24:20,284
♪ Got to keep things cool
With the apex predator!♪
489
00:24:30,120 --> 00:24:31,208
Get in, loser.
490
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:36,692
♪ With the apex predator! ♪
491
00:24:36,866 --> 00:24:40,696
♪ Will she braid your hair?
Will she eat your heart?♪
492
00:24:40,870 --> 00:24:44,744
♪ How can you outsmart ♪
493
00:24:44,918 --> 00:24:46,572
♪ The apex predator? ♪
494
00:24:49,052 --> 00:24:50,532
♪ The apex predator? ♪
495
00:24:50,706 --> 00:24:52,534
♪ The apex predator! ♪
496
00:24:53,535 --> 00:24:56,712
You guys! Hey...
497
00:24:57,713 --> 00:25:00,150
Happy hump day, besties!
498
00:25:00,324 --> 00:25:03,023
Hi, Mrs. George.
499
00:25:03,197 --> 00:25:04,546
This is Cady.
500
00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:06,548
- I just moved here.
- From Kenya.
501
00:25:06,722 --> 00:25:11,074
Welcome, Cady from Kenya.
502
00:25:11,248 --> 00:25:14,904
We haven'’t had any new meat
in our little lady taco
in so long.
503
00:25:15,078 --> 00:25:16,166
Mom, go make snacks.
504
00:25:16,340 --> 00:25:17,994
For sure.
For sure, Regina, yeah.
505
00:25:18,168 --> 00:25:19,648
Thank you so much,
Mrs. George.
506
00:25:19,822 --> 00:25:21,650
You have a beautiful mansion.
507
00:25:21,824 --> 00:25:25,436
Just slay, queens.
Slay like no one'’s watching.
508
00:25:25,611 --> 00:25:28,309
But everybody'’s watching.
Because you'’re gorgeous!
509
00:25:33,532 --> 00:25:35,534
Wow, your room is really nice.
510
00:25:35,708 --> 00:25:39,146
Thanks.
It used to be my parents'’,
but I made them trade me.
511
00:25:47,197 --> 00:25:50,461
Cady! I made you
a Spotify playlist
512
00:25:50,636 --> 00:25:52,725
to help you catch up
on culture.
513
00:25:52,899 --> 00:25:55,989
Karen, come here.
I want to fix your eyebrows.
514
00:25:56,163 --> 00:25:57,120
Can I still have two?
515
00:25:57,294 --> 00:25:59,601
- Gretchen, move.
- Sorry.
516
00:25:59,775 --> 00:26:02,343
God, my hips are so wide.
517
00:26:02,517 --> 00:26:04,040
God, my pores are huge!
518
00:26:04,214 --> 00:26:06,086
I want skin like Cady'’s.
519
00:26:07,217 --> 00:26:09,219
My B.O. smells like crayons.
520
00:26:12,179 --> 00:26:15,138
Um, me, too! I'’m ugly, too.
521
00:26:15,312 --> 00:26:17,532
Oh, my God, I love her.
She'’s like a Martian.
522
00:26:17,706 --> 00:26:19,447
Who'’s hungry?
523
00:26:19,621 --> 00:26:20,927
Now, Cady,
524
00:26:21,101 --> 00:26:24,452
this is a very American snack
called guac.
525
00:26:24,626 --> 00:26:26,846
Is it okay or are you vegan?
526
00:26:27,020 --> 00:26:28,891
Oh, no, I'’m an omnivore.
527
00:26:29,065 --> 00:26:30,937
Yum-yum-yum. Okay, come here!
528
00:26:31,111 --> 00:26:33,853
I need you
to tell me everything.
529
00:26:34,027 --> 00:26:36,899
Have you seen any boys
that you think are cute yet?
530
00:26:37,073 --> 00:26:40,207
Oh. Uh, well, I...
531
00:26:40,381 --> 00:26:41,904
No.
532
00:26:42,078 --> 00:26:44,385
Well, don'’t worry.
It'’s just a matter of time.
533
00:26:44,559 --> 00:26:48,128
You know, I always say
that this school district
has the highest taxes,
534
00:26:48,302 --> 00:26:50,783
- but the hottest boys.
- That'’s disgusting.
535
00:26:50,957 --> 00:26:53,263
Oh, Regina!
You'’re never gonna believe
what I found
536
00:26:53,437 --> 00:26:54,656
in your closet this morning.
537
00:26:54,830 --> 00:26:56,266
Why were you in my closet?
538
00:26:56,440 --> 00:26:58,138
Because I'’m doing
that Japanese organizing thing
539
00:26:58,312 --> 00:27:00,793
where you take a little nap
in the closet.
540
00:27:02,490 --> 00:27:05,493
I found your Burn Book!
541
00:27:05,667 --> 00:27:08,365
Cady, this is just, like,
the funniest thing
542
00:27:08,539 --> 00:27:09,889
that the girls used to do.
543
00:27:10,063 --> 00:27:11,325
Please leave. You got it, baby.
544
00:27:11,499 --> 00:27:13,109
But, girls, I'’m gonna be
right downstairs
545
00:27:13,283 --> 00:27:15,024
if you need to talk to me
about anything.
546
00:27:15,198 --> 00:27:19,028
I mean it. Deep stuff
or boy troubles or blackheads
547
00:27:19,202 --> 00:27:21,378
or alcohol poisoning.
548
00:27:21,552 --> 00:27:23,511
You know, I have
been through it all.
549
00:27:23,685 --> 00:27:26,209
Honey, I am not a regular mom.
550
00:27:26,383 --> 00:27:29,169
I'’m {coolmom with six O'’s.
551
00:27:29,343 --> 00:27:31,345
Hashtag AgingHotly. Hashtag...
552
00:27:31,519 --> 00:27:33,390
Get out. Okay.
553
00:27:33,564 --> 00:27:35,871
Girls, just have so much fun.
554
00:27:36,045 --> 00:27:40,310
Remember,
these are the best days
of your life.
555
00:27:41,529 --> 00:27:43,574
It does not get better.
556
00:27:46,403 --> 00:27:49,711
I remember this.
It was the week they took
all of our phones away.
557
00:27:52,366 --> 00:27:55,369
"Trang Pham is
a grotsky little byotch."
558
00:27:55,543 --> 00:27:56,805
Still true.
559
00:27:56,979 --> 00:27:59,852
"Dawn Schweitzer
is a horny shrimp."
560
00:28:00,026 --> 00:28:01,592
Well, she'’s taller now.
561
00:28:01,767 --> 00:28:05,292
Oh, my God.
"Janis '’Imi'’ike, Pyro-Lez."
562
00:28:05,466 --> 00:28:06,772
I forgot about that.
563
00:28:06,946 --> 00:28:08,425
Oh, my God, she is so weird.
564
00:28:08,599 --> 00:28:10,471
She is? She'’s in my homeroom.
565
00:28:10,645 --> 00:28:13,517
Oh, well, watch out,
'’cause she'’s violent.
566
00:28:13,692 --> 00:28:15,737
Yeah, people think
she'’s really good at art,
567
00:28:15,911 --> 00:28:17,913
but it'’s just '’cause
she had to do art therapy.
568
00:28:18,087 --> 00:28:20,611
Yeah, Regina tried
to be friends with her
in middle school.
569
00:28:20,786 --> 00:28:22,135
Oh, my God,
she was obsessed with me.
570
00:28:22,309 --> 00:28:24,528
And then when I got
my first boyfriend, Kyle,
571
00:28:24,703 --> 00:28:26,705
she lit my backpack on fire.
572
00:28:28,315 --> 00:28:29,577
Who'’s that?
573
00:28:29,751 --> 00:28:31,971
Mmm...
That'’s that kid Damian.
574
00:28:32,145 --> 00:28:34,364
Oh, yeah, he'’s almost too gay
to function.
575
00:28:36,323 --> 00:28:38,064
No, I didn'’t... I didn'’t
mean that in a bad way.
576
00:28:38,238 --> 00:28:40,153
No, that'’s funny.
Put that in there.
577
00:28:40,327 --> 00:28:41,415
Um...
578
00:28:42,677 --> 00:28:44,461
No, I don'’t... Oh! No, no.
579
00:28:44,635 --> 00:28:46,550
Don'’t worry, Cady,
we only write stuff
about randos in here.
580
00:28:46,725 --> 00:28:49,771
Friends are, like,
very deserving of respect.
581
00:28:49,945 --> 00:28:52,382
Gretchen... she gets it.
582
00:28:53,122 --> 00:28:54,167
Go find the shoes.
583
00:28:56,343 --> 00:28:58,519
The shoes we'’re giving
to Cady.
584
00:28:58,693 --> 00:29:02,001
Oh, my God, you are literally
being so annoying.
585
00:29:03,785 --> 00:29:04,655
Sorry.
586
00:29:14,404 --> 00:29:15,536
Are you okay?
587
00:29:15,710 --> 00:29:17,625
No... uh, totally.
588
00:29:17,799 --> 00:29:19,583
Regina'’s just joking.
589
00:29:19,758 --> 00:29:21,455
These are cute. Try '’em.
590
00:29:23,762 --> 00:29:26,112
Once I processed that Regina'’s
love language is anger,
591
00:29:26,286 --> 00:29:27,330
it'’s been much...
592
00:29:28,723 --> 00:29:31,073
Aw.
593
00:29:31,247 --> 00:29:33,989
It'’s the music box
I gave Regina
that my abuelito gave me.
594
00:29:43,825 --> 00:29:46,349
♪ Tell me
What'’s wrong with me ♪
595
00:29:46,523 --> 00:29:49,004
♪ My body, face, my hair ♪
596
00:29:50,092 --> 00:29:53,704
♪ Tell me all my many faults ♪
597
00:29:53,879 --> 00:29:55,576
♪ Tell me like you care ♪
598
00:29:55,750 --> 00:29:58,927
♪ When we both
Know you'’re cruel ♪
599
00:29:59,101 --> 00:30:02,235
♪ And we both know
You'’re right ♪
600
00:30:02,409 --> 00:30:05,499
♪ I could listen to you ♪
601
00:30:05,673 --> 00:30:08,632
♪ Like a fool all night ♪
602
00:30:08,807 --> 00:30:11,722
♪ What'’s wrong with me? ♪
603
00:30:11,897 --> 00:30:14,769
♪ How I speak?
How I dress?♪
604
00:30:14,943 --> 00:30:18,294
♪ What'’s wrong with me? ♪
605
00:30:18,468 --> 00:30:21,863
♪ You keep me guessing ♪
606
00:30:22,037 --> 00:30:26,999
♪ Mama called me "beautiful"
Don'’t believe her anymore ♪
607
00:30:27,173 --> 00:30:30,567
♪ Now I'’m listening to you ♪
608
00:30:30,741 --> 00:30:33,919
♪ What do I do that for? ♪
609
00:30:34,093 --> 00:30:39,881
♪ Please don'’t ignore me ♪
610
00:30:45,147 --> 00:30:46,235
Gretchen!
611
00:30:46,409 --> 00:30:47,846
What are you doing in there?
612
00:30:48,020 --> 00:30:49,412
I'’m... I'’m gonna go.
613
00:30:49,586 --> 00:30:51,719
Yep. Be right there!
614
00:30:56,811 --> 00:30:58,900
♪ What'’s wrong with me?
What can I do?♪
615
00:30:59,074 --> 00:31:01,642
♪ What'’s wrong with me?
Could it be you?♪
616
00:31:01,816 --> 00:31:03,209
♪ It'’s probably me ♪
617
00:31:03,383 --> 00:31:06,038
♪ See that? You see? ♪
618
00:31:06,212 --> 00:31:09,215
♪ What'’s wrong with me? ♪
619
00:31:22,663 --> 00:31:25,100
They have this book,
this "Burn Book,"
620
00:31:25,274 --> 00:31:27,189
where they write mean things
about girls in our grade.
621
00:31:27,363 --> 00:31:29,452
Ooh, ooh! What does
it say about me?
622
00:31:30,323 --> 00:31:32,368
Um... you'’re not in it.
623
00:31:32,934 --> 00:31:34,240
Those bitches!
624
00:31:34,414 --> 00:31:35,806
What is this, by the way?
It'’s terrible.
625
00:31:35,981 --> 00:31:37,547
Oh, it'’s a Kaälteen bar.
626
00:31:37,721 --> 00:31:39,767
Here, my mom used to give them
to elderly people in Kapedo
627
00:31:39,941 --> 00:31:42,030
to help them
- gain weight.
- Mmm.
628
00:31:42,204 --> 00:31:43,902
I can feel it working.
629
00:31:44,076 --> 00:31:46,339
We should, like, crush this up
and put it in Regina'’s food!
630
00:31:46,513 --> 00:31:47,818
- What?
- Oh.
631
00:31:47,993 --> 00:31:49,385
No. No, no.
632
00:31:49,559 --> 00:31:51,257
I will keep having
lunch with them, that'’s it.
633
00:31:51,431 --> 00:31:54,434
Also, we feel bad
we yelled at you
634
00:31:54,608 --> 00:31:56,131
about liking Aaron.
635
00:31:56,305 --> 00:31:58,481
You should go
for what you want.
636
00:31:58,655 --> 00:32:00,831
- Hetero allyship.
- Oh, okay.
637
00:32:01,006 --> 00:32:03,617
It'’s so dumb. I only
ever see him in Calc anyway.
638
00:32:03,791 --> 00:32:07,316
Oh. You'’re definitely
safe in Calc.
639
00:32:07,490 --> 00:32:09,275
Regina will never set foot
in there.
640
00:32:22,810 --> 00:32:24,725
- New shoes?
- Uh, yeah.
641
00:32:24,899 --> 00:32:26,466
Regina gave them to me.
642
00:32:26,640 --> 00:32:29,164
Huh. I didn'’t know
you guys were friends.
643
00:32:29,338 --> 00:32:30,949
Okay, let'’s get back into it.
644
00:32:31,123 --> 00:32:32,689
Continuity.
Removable discont...
645
00:32:32,863 --> 00:32:34,082
Cady? Eyes up front, please.
646
00:32:35,518 --> 00:32:37,651
Let'’s get back
into where we were Thursday.
647
00:32:37,825 --> 00:32:39,827
Who was awake Thursday?
Who was still awake?
648
00:32:41,568 --> 00:32:43,265
I like your jacket.
649
00:32:43,439 --> 00:32:44,658
Thanks, I made it.
650
00:32:44,832 --> 00:32:46,529
But why do you sew
on top of your drawings?
651
00:32:46,703 --> 00:32:49,402
It'’s... like the drawings
are facts
652
00:32:49,576 --> 00:32:50,794
and the threads are feelings.
653
00:32:50,969 --> 00:32:53,058
It'’s so cool.
654
00:32:55,712 --> 00:32:58,324
So, you talk to your man yet?
655
00:33:00,326 --> 00:33:02,067
I mean, I don'’t even
know what to say to him.
656
00:33:02,241 --> 00:33:05,157
I always come off sounding
like a lunatic.
657
00:33:05,331 --> 00:33:07,202
- Do you like gum?
- Sure.
658
00:33:08,508 --> 00:33:10,858
Oh, I don'’t have any.
I was just...
659
00:33:11,032 --> 00:33:13,252
Oh.
660
00:33:15,950 --> 00:33:19,693
What?
Why did you say that?
661
00:33:19,867 --> 00:33:23,131
Maybe just try to have
one successful interaction
per day?
662
00:33:26,178 --> 00:33:28,397
- I like your shirt.
- Thanks.
663
00:33:28,571 --> 00:33:30,704
It smells like sausage
from the last time I wore it.
664
00:33:34,229 --> 00:33:35,970
Dear God, woman.
665
00:33:36,144 --> 00:33:39,408
Have you successfully been
a functioning human being
even once?
666
00:33:41,236 --> 00:33:44,587
On October 3rd,
he asked me what day it was.
667
00:33:44,761 --> 00:33:47,286
- What day is it?
- It'’s October 3rd.
668
00:33:47,460 --> 00:33:51,333
♪ October 3rd ♪
669
00:33:51,507 --> 00:33:53,074
That was two weeks ago.
670
00:33:54,510 --> 00:33:55,903
But today I kind of...
671
00:33:56,077 --> 00:33:57,209
I don'’t know,
I tried something
672
00:33:57,383 --> 00:34:00,168
and it just came to me
instinctively.
673
00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:03,432
I said I was lost.
674
00:34:03,606 --> 00:34:06,174
I'’m totally lost.
Can you help me?
675
00:34:07,219 --> 00:34:08,611
But I wasn'’t lost.
676
00:34:08,785 --> 00:34:10,396
I knew exactly what
Ms. Norbury was talking about.
677
00:34:10,570 --> 00:34:14,008
It'’s the derivative
of the natural log function.
678
00:34:14,182 --> 00:34:16,793
You just take the reciprocal
of the ln.
679
00:34:18,534 --> 00:34:19,361
Thanks.
680
00:34:20,667 --> 00:34:22,669
You'’re so smart.
681
00:34:24,801 --> 00:34:25,802
He was wrong.
682
00:34:25,976 --> 00:34:27,543
Wait, wait. Hold up.
683
00:34:27,717 --> 00:34:29,502
- Guys, pause!
- Oh.
684
00:34:32,418 --> 00:34:34,115
You pretended to be dumb
685
00:34:34,289 --> 00:34:36,639
so you could keep talking
to a guy?
686
00:34:36,813 --> 00:34:39,512
Uh... Yeah. It worked.
687
00:34:39,686 --> 00:34:41,340
'’Cause that shit
always works, Caddy.
688
00:34:41,514 --> 00:34:42,993
It doesn'’t mean
that it'’s not evil.
689
00:34:43,168 --> 00:34:46,040
Fracking "works."
Red-lining "works."
690
00:34:46,214 --> 00:34:48,086
Gasoline and rags...
691
00:34:48,260 --> 00:34:50,479
Aren'’t you worried
Regina will eat your face
if she finds out?
692
00:34:50,653 --> 00:34:52,307
No, she won'’t find out.
693
00:34:52,481 --> 00:34:55,615
It'’s just my little
Calculus class secret.
694
00:34:55,789 --> 00:34:58,270
Oh, um...
695
00:34:58,444 --> 00:35:01,186
So its h prime of x
equals five.
696
00:35:01,360 --> 00:35:03,144
You just forgot
the Product Rule.
697
00:35:03,318 --> 00:35:05,015
I don'’t get any of this.
698
00:35:06,626 --> 00:35:07,583
Nice job, Cady.
699
00:35:07,757 --> 00:35:09,542
It sure seems like you get it.
700
00:35:15,330 --> 00:35:19,900
Hey, my friend Chris is, uh,
having a Halloween party.
701
00:35:20,074 --> 00:35:21,641
Would you want
to come to that?
702
00:35:21,815 --> 00:35:23,991
It'’s like a costume party.
People get pretty into it.
703
00:35:24,165 --> 00:35:25,775
Grool.
704
00:35:25,949 --> 00:35:28,648
I meant to say "great," and
then I started to say "cool."
705
00:35:28,822 --> 00:35:29,997
Okay.
706
00:35:30,693 --> 00:35:31,912
Grool.
707
00:35:37,570 --> 00:35:38,788
Hi.
708
00:35:38,962 --> 00:35:40,312
♪ If I could change the world ♪
709
00:35:40,486 --> 00:35:44,490
♪ I'’d make it Halloween ♪
710
00:35:45,621 --> 00:35:48,407
♪ Every single day ♪
711
00:35:48,581 --> 00:35:51,932
♪ And also have world peace ♪
712
00:35:52,106 --> 00:35:55,065
♪ Maybe world peace
Should be first ♪
713
00:35:55,240 --> 00:35:57,720
♪ World peace
And then Halloween ♪
714
00:35:57,894 --> 00:35:59,244
Wait, let me start over.
715
00:36:02,508 --> 00:36:03,683
Hi.
716
00:36:03,857 --> 00:36:05,119
♪ If I could change the world ♪
717
00:36:05,293 --> 00:36:09,558
♪ I'’d make us have world peace ♪
718
00:36:09,732 --> 00:36:13,475
♪ And also Halloween ♪
719
00:36:13,649 --> 00:36:15,956
♪ Every single day ♪
720
00:36:16,130 --> 00:36:17,610
♪ On Halloween ♪
721
00:36:17,784 --> 00:36:21,614
♪ You can pretend
To be someone else ♪
722
00:36:21,788 --> 00:36:24,399
♪ It'’s like the Internet ♪
723
00:36:24,573 --> 00:36:30,362
♪ Only in person
And with candy ♪
724
00:36:30,536 --> 00:36:33,452
Wait. Mama,
use the back camera.
725
00:36:33,626 --> 00:36:37,020
It'’s prettier '’cause science.
726
00:36:37,195 --> 00:36:38,848
♪ When you are
The hot one ♪
727
00:36:39,022 --> 00:36:40,676
♪ It'’s a full-time gig ♪
728
00:36:40,850 --> 00:36:43,766
♪ Lookin'’ like what people
Want to see ♪
729
00:36:43,940 --> 00:36:47,553
♪ Once a year I'’m not
I dress up and dream big ♪
730
00:36:47,727 --> 00:36:49,729
♪ Disguised as someone else
Who is not me ♪
731
00:36:49,903 --> 00:36:51,339
♪ But is still hot! ♪
732
00:36:51,513 --> 00:36:52,645
♪ I can be ♪
733
00:36:52,819 --> 00:36:55,256
♪ Who I want to be and sexy! ♪
734
00:36:55,430 --> 00:36:58,651
♪ I can be
Who I want to be and hot!♪
735
00:36:58,825 --> 00:37:02,350
♪ Don'’t like who you are
Then hit that costume shop ♪
736
00:37:02,524 --> 00:37:06,136
♪ Rock a new
And different sexy look ♪
737
00:37:06,311 --> 00:37:09,444
♪ Why be so downhearted?
Blast some trashy pop ♪
738
00:37:09,618 --> 00:37:12,708
♪ And drop it to this hot
And sexy hook ♪
739
00:37:12,882 --> 00:37:16,930
♪ I can be
Who I want to be and sexy!♪
740
00:37:17,104 --> 00:37:20,499
♪ I can be
Who I want to be and hot!♪
741
00:37:20,673 --> 00:37:23,632
♪ Be somebody new ♪
742
00:37:23,806 --> 00:37:27,810
♪ Do a total transformation ♪
743
00:37:27,984 --> 00:37:31,249
♪ Animal or mineral, too ♪
744
00:37:31,423 --> 00:37:35,340
♪ Or even vegetation! ♪
745
00:37:35,514 --> 00:37:37,124
I give you sexy corn.
746
00:37:37,298 --> 00:37:40,388
♪ I can be who I want to be ♪
747
00:37:40,562 --> 00:37:43,391
♪ And sexy! ♪
748
00:37:54,272 --> 00:37:55,795
Why are you dressed so scary?
749
00:37:55,969 --> 00:37:57,187
It'’s Halloween.
750
00:37:57,362 --> 00:37:58,798
Cady,
if you don'’t dress slutty,
751
00:37:58,972 --> 00:38:00,582
that is slut-shaming us.
752
00:38:06,022 --> 00:38:09,330
Um, it'’s just,
like, traditionally,
753
00:38:09,504 --> 00:38:11,114
girls had to be witches
or clowns
754
00:38:11,289 --> 00:38:14,074
and we'’ve worked really hard
to progress past that.
755
00:38:14,248 --> 00:38:16,032
That makes sense.
756
00:38:18,513 --> 00:38:20,428
I'’m gonna go find Aaron.
757
00:38:20,602 --> 00:38:21,603
Okay.
758
00:38:24,084 --> 00:38:26,608
♪ A sexy Quint
From sexy Jaws ♪
759
00:38:26,782 --> 00:38:28,349
♪ Catching sexy sharks ♪
760
00:38:28,523 --> 00:38:31,961
♪ Sexy Eleanor Roosevelt
Or sexy Joan of Arc ♪
761
00:38:32,135 --> 00:38:35,704
♪ I can be a sexy pirate
Or a sexy ballet dancer ♪
762
00:38:35,878 --> 00:38:40,492
♪ I can be a sexy doctor
And cure some sexy cancer!♪
763
00:38:40,666 --> 00:38:42,624
That'’s not right,
- is it?
- No.
764
00:38:43,756 --> 00:38:45,497
I can sexy cure some cancer?
765
00:38:45,671 --> 00:38:46,976
No.
766
00:38:47,150 --> 00:38:49,152
I can cure sex cancer!
767
00:38:49,327 --> 00:38:51,198
Sex cancer doesn'’t exist.
768
00:38:51,372 --> 00:38:53,505
I did it.
769
00:38:53,679 --> 00:38:54,506
Dance break.
770
00:39:06,779 --> 00:39:08,476
♪ Happy Halloween! ♪
771
00:39:12,132 --> 00:39:15,918
♪ This is
Modern feminism talkin'’♪
772
00:39:16,092 --> 00:39:19,444
♪ Watch me as I run the world
In shoes I cannot walk in ♪
773
00:39:19,618 --> 00:39:22,882
♪ I can be who I want to be ♪
774
00:39:23,056 --> 00:39:26,494
♪ And sex... sex ♪
775
00:39:26,668 --> 00:39:30,716
♪ Sexy! ♪
776
00:39:32,239 --> 00:39:34,937
I'’m a sexy mouse. Duh!
777
00:39:38,593 --> 00:39:39,899
- Hey.
- Hi.
778
00:39:40,073 --> 00:39:41,248
Cady!
779
00:39:41,422 --> 00:39:42,945
Hi!
780
00:39:43,119 --> 00:39:45,295
- Ow.
- Hey.
781
00:39:45,470 --> 00:39:46,993
I like your costume.
782
00:39:47,167 --> 00:39:48,864
Different
from everyone else'’s.
783
00:39:49,038 --> 00:39:51,737
I didn'’t know
I was supposed to...
784
00:39:53,129 --> 00:39:54,653
I'’m such a weird
foreign loser.
785
00:39:54,827 --> 00:39:56,394
No. It'’s great.
786
00:39:57,699 --> 00:39:58,831
You want a drink?
787
00:39:59,005 --> 00:40:01,007
Thanks.
Uh, do they have juice?
788
00:40:02,487 --> 00:40:04,271
I can check. Wait here.
789
00:40:06,969 --> 00:40:09,798
I think you and Aaron
would be a really cute couple.
790
00:40:09,972 --> 00:40:11,147
- Really?
- Yeah.
791
00:40:11,321 --> 00:40:12,714
I just said so.
Don'’t be thirsty.
792
00:40:12,888 --> 00:40:15,891
You know, I could talk
to him for you. If you want.
793
00:40:16,065 --> 00:40:18,198
See if he likes you back.
794
00:40:18,372 --> 00:40:20,548
- You would do that for me?
- Mm-hmm.
795
00:40:20,722 --> 00:40:23,203
Trust me. I know exactly
how to play it.
796
00:40:26,946 --> 00:40:29,339
- I need to talk to you.
- Me?
797
00:40:29,514 --> 00:40:31,124
I thought you were done
talking to me
798
00:40:31,298 --> 00:40:32,908
when you started talking
to Shane last summer.
799
00:40:33,082 --> 00:40:36,303
Shut up. '’Cause you know
that homeschooled girl, Cady?
800
00:40:37,435 --> 00:40:38,914
Yeah, I invited her tonight.
801
00:40:40,307 --> 00:40:41,830
Yeah, well, be careful.
802
00:40:42,004 --> 00:40:43,571
'’Cause she has
a huge crush on you.
803
00:40:43,745 --> 00:40:46,356
Really?
804
00:40:46,531 --> 00:40:48,054
Don'’t be gross.
805
00:40:48,750 --> 00:40:50,491
She'’s my friend and...
806
00:40:50,665 --> 00:40:54,321
...she'’s, like, really
inexperienced and, um...
807
00:41:00,066 --> 00:41:02,329
Wow, sorry.
808
00:41:02,503 --> 00:41:04,374
I didn'’t think this
would be so hard for me.
809
00:41:04,549 --> 00:41:05,637
What?
810
00:41:05,811 --> 00:41:07,203
I don'’t know,
I guess I just...
811
00:41:07,377 --> 00:41:10,380
just have, like, a lot
of, like, unresolved trauma
812
00:41:10,555 --> 00:41:12,121
from how things ended with us.
813
00:41:12,295 --> 00:41:13,732
Give me a break.
814
00:41:17,649 --> 00:41:18,650
Regina.
815
00:41:20,869 --> 00:41:22,523
- Regina.
- Leave me alone.
816
00:41:22,697 --> 00:41:24,438
G, why are you upset?
817
00:41:24,612 --> 00:41:25,700
Please.
818
00:41:25,874 --> 00:41:28,877
What do you mean,
please? G!
819
00:41:41,673 --> 00:41:44,545
♪ Yes, I look perfect ♪
820
00:41:44,719 --> 00:41:46,982
♪ Ice Queen
That'’s what you see ♪
821
00:41:47,156 --> 00:41:50,420
♪ It'’s what they all expect
From me ♪
822
00:41:50,595 --> 00:41:53,336
♪ But it'’s all show ♪
823
00:41:53,511 --> 00:41:56,165
♪ Face it, you used me ♪
824
00:41:56,339 --> 00:41:58,994
♪ You saw the sexy clothes ♪
825
00:41:59,168 --> 00:42:02,824
♪ My supermodel pose ♪
826
00:42:02,998 --> 00:42:05,131
♪ What did you know? ♪
827
00:42:05,305 --> 00:42:08,308
♪ Was I a game to you? ♪
828
00:42:08,482 --> 00:42:11,137
♪ Was I a way to be cool? ♪
829
00:42:11,311 --> 00:42:14,401
♪ I truly cared ♪
830
00:42:14,575 --> 00:42:17,273
♪ Was I the fool? ♪
831
00:42:17,447 --> 00:42:19,841
♪ It'’s fine for you ♪
832
00:42:20,015 --> 00:42:23,062
♪ It'’s fine to flirt ♪
833
00:42:23,236 --> 00:42:28,067
♪ It'’s fine ♪
834
00:42:28,241 --> 00:42:29,634
♪ Till someone gets hurt ♪
835
00:42:35,683 --> 00:42:37,990
♪ Feel my heart beating? ♪
836
00:42:38,164 --> 00:42:41,123
♪ I'’m just like her or you ♪
837
00:42:41,297 --> 00:42:44,300
♪ People forget I'’m human, too ♪
838
00:42:44,474 --> 00:42:46,564
♪ Yes, they do that ♪
839
00:42:47,869 --> 00:42:50,524
♪ This is performance ♪
840
00:42:50,698 --> 00:42:53,614
♪ This is all self-defense ♪
841
00:42:53,788 --> 00:42:56,704
♪ I thought you had the sense ♪
842
00:42:56,878 --> 00:42:59,272
♪ To see through that ♪
843
00:42:59,446 --> 00:43:02,188
♪ Was I too proud with you? ♪
844
00:43:02,362 --> 00:43:05,583
♪ Was I too cold
And forbidding?♪
845
00:43:05,757 --> 00:43:08,760
♪ You chose her over me
Well ♪
846
00:43:08,934 --> 00:43:11,284
♪ Are you kidding? ♪
847
00:43:11,458 --> 00:43:13,852
♪ It'’s fine for you ♪
848
00:43:14,026 --> 00:43:16,332
♪ It'’s fine to flirt ♪
849
00:43:17,246 --> 00:43:21,947
♪ It'’s fine ♪
850
00:43:22,121 --> 00:43:23,992
♪ Till someone gets hurt ♪
851
00:43:28,344 --> 00:43:33,567
♪ Till someone gets hurt! ♪
852
00:43:35,482 --> 00:43:37,049
♪ Poor little me ♪
853
00:43:37,223 --> 00:43:41,009
♪ I'’m trapped
In this fabulous show ♪
854
00:43:41,183 --> 00:43:43,882
♪ You could set me free ♪
855
00:43:44,056 --> 00:43:48,756
♪ But if you'’re going, go ♪
856
00:43:51,324 --> 00:43:54,283
♪ It'’s fine for you ♪
857
00:43:54,457 --> 00:43:57,069
♪ It'’s fine to flirt ♪
858
00:43:57,243 --> 00:44:00,333
♪ And, God, you'’re hot! ♪
859
00:44:00,507 --> 00:44:03,292
♪ Why do you even
Wear a shirt?♪
860
00:44:03,466 --> 00:44:07,340
♪ No, it'’s fine ♪
861
00:44:07,514 --> 00:44:09,472
♪ Damn, you'’re fine! ♪
862
00:44:09,647 --> 00:44:14,695
♪ And it'’s fine ♪
863
00:44:14,869 --> 00:44:16,001
♪ Till someone gets... ♪
864
00:44:44,638 --> 00:44:47,859
She took him back.
She took Aaron back.
865
00:44:48,033 --> 00:44:49,861
Of course she did.
866
00:44:50,035 --> 00:44:52,646
It'’s because Regina'’s
a life ruiner!
867
00:44:52,820 --> 00:44:54,213
When we were in sixth grade,
she told everybody
868
00:44:54,387 --> 00:44:55,823
that Janis was... Damian!
869
00:44:55,997 --> 00:44:57,869
Okay. She does not need
to hear that right now.
870
00:44:58,043 --> 00:45:00,088
No, I know the story.
871
00:45:00,262 --> 00:45:02,743
You lit a fire '’cause Regina
got a boyfriend.
872
00:45:02,917 --> 00:45:04,310
She said what?
873
00:45:04,484 --> 00:45:05,746
Oh, hell no.
874
00:45:05,920 --> 00:45:09,184
Damian... No! The truth
will be told.
875
00:45:09,358 --> 00:45:10,533
Stay with me, Cady.
876
00:45:15,103 --> 00:45:18,454
Like all history,
this is emotionally layered
and culturally dense.
877
00:45:22,328 --> 00:45:24,852
Janis and Regina were
best friends in middle school.
878
00:45:25,026 --> 00:45:29,030
And at that time, females
expressed their identities
through collectible plushies.
879
00:45:29,204 --> 00:45:30,815
I don'’t know what those...
880
00:45:30,989 --> 00:45:35,080
It'’s these bastards.
And they were everywhere.
881
00:45:35,254 --> 00:45:38,692
Regina gave Janis a BFF set
for her birthday.
882
00:45:38,866 --> 00:45:40,912
Janis put a rainbow patch
on hers.
883
00:45:41,086 --> 00:45:42,740
This is how she came out
to her friend.
884
00:45:42,914 --> 00:45:44,219
And Regina put one
on hers, too,
885
00:45:44,393 --> 00:45:47,048
out of allyship because
she used to be human.
886
00:45:47,222 --> 00:45:51,966
Cut to eight months later,
Regina becomes obsessed
with this gross boy. Kyle!
887
00:45:52,140 --> 00:45:54,490
Your scale is
- completely off.
- Hush!
888
00:45:56,492 --> 00:45:58,625
One night, they were
all playing spin the bottle...
889
00:45:58,799 --> 00:46:01,628
And Regina was worried
that Kyle liked Karen more.
890
00:46:01,802 --> 00:46:05,066
So when she spun
and got Janis,
891
00:46:05,937 --> 00:46:07,460
Regina put on a little show.
892
00:46:11,072 --> 00:46:12,421
And Kyle was like "boing"!
893
00:46:12,595 --> 00:46:13,858
And Regina was like...
894
00:46:14,032 --> 00:46:15,250
..."I knew she would let me!
895
00:46:15,424 --> 00:46:17,731
She'’s, like,
obsessed with me!"
896
00:46:17,905 --> 00:46:19,167
Not okay.
897
00:46:19,341 --> 00:46:21,126
Please put this all back
in its box.
898
00:46:21,300 --> 00:46:22,954
They got into a huge fight.
899
00:46:23,128 --> 00:46:24,912
Regina started avoiding Janis
at school,
900
00:46:25,086 --> 00:46:26,784
but did she give back
that plush animal?
901
00:46:26,958 --> 00:46:29,699
Oh, no.
She took it everywhere.
902
00:46:29,874 --> 00:46:32,528
She named her "Sissy Liz"
and she made everyone say
903
00:46:32,702 --> 00:46:33,878
"good morning" to it
every day,
904
00:46:34,052 --> 00:46:35,270
and it was very weird
and boring.
905
00:46:35,444 --> 00:46:36,576
Fast forward.
906
00:46:36,750 --> 00:46:38,491
One day in Science,
907
00:46:38,665 --> 00:46:41,189
Regina was making everyone
say hi to Sissy Liz.
908
00:46:41,363 --> 00:46:43,191
And Janis finally heard it.
909
00:46:43,365 --> 00:46:45,803
"Sissy Liz" was short
for "Obsessed Lesbian."
910
00:46:45,977 --> 00:46:48,893
Regina had been making fun
of Janis this entire time
911
00:46:49,067 --> 00:46:50,329
and everyone but her knew it.
912
00:46:51,417 --> 00:46:53,506
So, and this is regrettable...
913
00:46:55,943 --> 00:46:57,292
Janis took
her Bunsen burner...
914
00:46:59,251 --> 00:47:01,775
and torched the doll.
915
00:47:01,949 --> 00:47:04,082
And Regina'’s backpack
caught on fire a little bit
916
00:47:04,256 --> 00:47:07,259
and Janis was kicked
out of school
for the remainder of the year.
917
00:47:07,433 --> 00:47:09,739
And the adults
didn'’t know why.
918
00:47:09,914 --> 00:47:12,220
Janis just seemed crazy.
919
00:47:14,657 --> 00:47:16,529
I'’m really sorry
that happened.
920
00:47:18,531 --> 00:47:20,054
It'’s worse than my thing.
921
00:47:21,621 --> 00:47:23,144
Caddy, don'’t be sorry.
922
00:47:23,318 --> 00:47:26,495
Now you know Regina George
is not your friend.
923
00:47:26,669 --> 00:47:28,323
We are your friends.
924
00:47:28,497 --> 00:47:29,934
And we'’re gonna
make her pay.
925
00:47:33,894 --> 00:47:34,939
♪ You know what friends do? ♪
926
00:47:35,113 --> 00:47:36,984
♪ They got your back ♪
927
00:47:37,158 --> 00:47:39,900
♪ And they are fun
To be around♪♪ Whoa ♪
928
00:47:40,074 --> 00:47:42,120
♪ When someone hurts you
Then they attack ♪
929
00:47:42,294 --> 00:47:44,644
♪ And grind your foe
Into the ground!♪
930
00:47:44,818 --> 00:47:46,559
♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪
931
00:47:46,733 --> 00:47:49,083
♪ Imagine a party
With dresses and cake ♪
932
00:47:49,257 --> 00:47:52,043
♪ And singing and dancing
And cake ♪
933
00:47:52,217 --> 00:47:55,437
♪ And there'’s a magic act
That saws Regina in half ♪
934
00:47:55,611 --> 00:47:59,093
♪ And this time
It'’ll take♪
935
00:47:59,267 --> 00:48:03,271
Now that'’s a party!♪ It'’s a revenge party
A party that ends ♪
936
00:48:03,445 --> 00:48:05,534
♪ With somebody'’s head
On a spike ♪
937
00:48:05,708 --> 00:48:09,495
♪ It'’s a revenge party
With your two best friends ♪
938
00:48:09,669 --> 00:48:12,280
♪ It'’s like a party
With revenge
Is what it'’s like ♪
939
00:48:13,847 --> 00:48:15,109
Caddy, in order
for this to work,
940
00:48:15,283 --> 00:48:16,676
you need to act
like a huge phony.
941
00:48:16,850 --> 00:48:18,199
Can you do it?
942
00:48:18,373 --> 00:48:19,331
I... I think so.
943
00:48:19,505 --> 00:48:21,289
Practice.
944
00:48:21,463 --> 00:48:24,336
Regina wanted me to tell you
that she tried
to talk to Aaron,
945
00:48:24,510 --> 00:48:27,513
but he just wanted her back,
and that'’s not Regina'’s fault.
946
00:48:27,687 --> 00:48:29,341
Of course. Oh, my gosh.
947
00:48:30,255 --> 00:48:31,604
Love ya. See you at lunch.
948
00:48:31,778 --> 00:48:34,520
- Perfect!
- On to phase two.
949
00:48:34,694 --> 00:48:36,957
♪ I'’ll bring
The glow sticks ♪
950
00:48:37,131 --> 00:48:39,873
♪ I'’ll bring balloons
And we'’ll have
Chocolate ice cream cones ♪
951
00:48:40,047 --> 00:48:41,657
♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪
952
00:48:41,831 --> 00:48:44,182
♪ I'’ll be the DJ
Spinnin'’ the tunes ♪
953
00:48:44,356 --> 00:48:47,272
♪ On a turntable made
Of her bones ♪
954
00:48:47,446 --> 00:48:50,536
♪ We'’ll get a piñata
'’Cause that would be fun ♪
955
00:48:50,710 --> 00:48:52,103
♪ And play dress up
And Barbies ♪
956
00:48:52,277 --> 00:48:53,756
♪ And tag ♪
957
00:48:53,931 --> 00:48:55,149
♪ And we'’ll roll on the grass ♪
958
00:48:55,323 --> 00:48:57,021
♪ And stare up at the sun ♪
959
00:48:57,195 --> 00:48:59,893
♪ Then we'’ll stuff her remains
In a bag ♪
960
00:49:00,067 --> 00:49:01,677
♪ And throw '’em in the river! ♪
961
00:49:01,851 --> 00:49:04,985
♪ A revenge party
A party that ends ♪
962
00:49:05,159 --> 00:49:07,727
♪ With entrails
All over the lawn ♪
963
00:49:07,901 --> 00:49:10,948
♪ A revenge party
With your two best friends ♪
964
00:49:11,122 --> 00:49:13,428
♪ And I end up with Aaron
When she'’s gone ♪
965
00:49:13,602 --> 00:49:15,778
Yes, bitch!
966
00:49:17,389 --> 00:49:19,739
I end up with Aaron
when she'’s gone.
967
00:49:20,348 --> 00:49:21,654
Yes, bitch.
968
00:49:31,229 --> 00:49:32,491
I think I need a tutor.
969
00:49:32,665 --> 00:49:34,884
I could tutor you,
if you want.
970
00:49:36,408 --> 00:49:38,323
♪ What'’s Regina doin'’? ♪
971
00:49:38,497 --> 00:49:39,759
♪ What'’s Regina wearin'’? ♪
972
00:49:39,933 --> 00:49:42,022
♪ Is she back with Aaron? ♪
973
00:49:42,196 --> 00:49:45,852
♪ Regina! Regina!
She has everything
She gets everything ♪
974
00:49:47,506 --> 00:49:49,247
♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪
975
00:49:50,291 --> 00:49:51,379
What is that?
976
00:49:51,553 --> 00:49:53,033
Ugh, I'’m so fat
and disgusting.
977
00:49:53,207 --> 00:49:54,382
I'’m not having anything
978
00:49:54,556 --> 00:49:56,167
but Kaälteen bars
until I lose weight.
979
00:49:56,341 --> 00:49:57,777
Well, I need
to lose three pounds.
980
00:49:57,951 --> 00:49:58,908
How many calories from fat?
981
00:49:59,083 --> 00:50:00,171
Zero.
982
00:50:00,345 --> 00:50:02,042
You cross-multiply x
over a thousand
983
00:50:02,216 --> 00:50:03,870
and divide it by 0.5
because it'’s in kilograms.
984
00:50:04,044 --> 00:50:06,438
Whatever.
Bring me a whole box.
985
00:50:06,612 --> 00:50:08,701
No, um, bring me two.
986
00:50:15,795 --> 00:50:18,972
♪ A revenge party
A party that ends ♪
987
00:50:19,146 --> 00:50:21,714
♪ With somebody crushed
And alone♪♪ And ugly-crying! ♪
988
00:50:21,888 --> 00:50:24,978
♪ A revenge party
With your two best friends ♪
989
00:50:25,152 --> 00:50:27,415
♪ It'’s like a party
With revenge
Is what we'’re throwin'’!♪
990
00:50:44,432 --> 00:50:46,217
♪ What'’s Regina eating? ♪
991
00:50:46,391 --> 00:50:48,045
♪ God, look at her figure ♪
992
00:50:48,219 --> 00:50:50,786
♪ Did her boobs get bigger?
Regina! Regina!♪
993
00:50:50,960 --> 00:50:52,614
♪ She has everything! ♪
994
00:50:52,788 --> 00:50:54,790
♪ She gets everything! ♪
995
00:50:54,964 --> 00:50:57,402
♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪
996
00:51:01,536 --> 00:51:04,278
Six weeks and all we'’ve done
is make Regina hotter
and revive the wet look.
997
00:51:04,452 --> 00:51:06,237
We have to pivot.
998
00:51:06,411 --> 00:51:08,848
If we can make
Gretchen Wieners think
that Regina is mad at her...
999
00:51:09,022 --> 00:51:10,676
No, no, no.
Gretchen is fragile.
1000
00:51:10,850 --> 00:51:12,721
Exactly!
1001
00:51:12,895 --> 00:51:14,462
If we crack her open,
maybe she'’ll spill
something we can use.
1002
00:51:22,470 --> 00:51:24,342
♪ Party ♪
1003
00:51:24,516 --> 00:51:26,866
Hey, girl, you sending
any candy canes this year?
1004
00:51:27,040 --> 00:51:29,912
Oh.
I don'’t send them.
I just get them.
1005
00:51:31,479 --> 00:51:33,873
Um, stop pulling it down.
1006
00:51:34,047 --> 00:51:36,093
Your hair looks so sexy
pushed back.
1007
00:51:37,224 --> 00:51:38,834
Cady, would you
please tell him
1008
00:51:39,008 --> 00:51:41,054
that his hair looks sexy
pushed back?
1009
00:51:42,708 --> 00:51:44,536
Your hair looks sexy
pushed back.
1010
00:51:44,710 --> 00:51:45,754
Oh...
1011
00:51:51,369 --> 00:51:52,370
Thanks.
1012
00:51:56,374 --> 00:51:58,376
I'’ll, uh, see you in Calc.
1013
00:52:00,552 --> 00:52:03,120
♪ At every party
There might be a low ♪
1014
00:52:03,294 --> 00:52:06,775
♪ Where the energy dips♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪
1015
00:52:06,949 --> 00:52:13,652
♪ You might be thinking
"It'’s late, we should go
And they ran out of chips"♪
1016
00:52:13,826 --> 00:52:17,438
♪ No! I can'’t even watch
When she touches his hair ♪
1017
00:52:17,612 --> 00:52:20,137
♪ And I'’ve watched a snake
Eat a cow ♪
1018
00:52:20,311 --> 00:52:23,749
♪ Regina needs to be toppled
Sorry, Gretchen, I swear ♪
1019
00:52:23,923 --> 00:52:26,839
♪ We'’ll get our party now! ♪
1020
00:52:27,013 --> 00:52:29,058
One candy cane, please!
1021
00:52:31,583 --> 00:52:34,847
♪ A revenge party
A party that ends ♪
1022
00:52:35,021 --> 00:52:37,066
♪ With lions in a Roman arena ♪
1023
00:52:37,241 --> 00:52:39,982
♪ She has everything!
She gets everything!♪
1024
00:52:41,375 --> 00:52:42,985
♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪
1025
00:52:43,160 --> 00:52:44,813
Ho, ho, ho!
1026
00:52:44,987 --> 00:52:47,076
Candy Cane Gram
for Shane Oman!
1027
00:52:47,251 --> 00:52:48,469
♪ She has everything! ♪
1028
00:52:48,643 --> 00:52:50,558
And one for Cady Heron.
1029
00:52:50,732 --> 00:52:51,907
♪ She gets everything! ♪
1030
00:52:52,081 --> 00:52:53,953
Four for Glen Coco?
1031
00:52:54,127 --> 00:52:55,911
You go, Glen Coco!
1032
00:52:56,085 --> 00:52:58,044
♪ Glen Coco!
Glen Coco! Glen Coco!♪
1033
00:52:59,393 --> 00:53:03,005
And... none
for Gretchen Wieners, bye.
1034
00:53:03,789 --> 00:53:04,746
Who sent that?
1035
00:53:04,920 --> 00:53:06,052
Oh, it'’s from...
1036
00:53:06,226 --> 00:53:08,185
♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪
1037
00:53:08,359 --> 00:53:11,449
"Thanks for being
such a great best friend."
1038
00:53:11,623 --> 00:53:12,537
Aw.
1039
00:53:13,451 --> 00:53:14,669
Oh.
1040
00:53:15,844 --> 00:53:16,932
Okay.
1041
00:53:18,456 --> 00:53:20,197
If you and Regina are
"best friends" now,
1042
00:53:20,371 --> 00:53:23,112
then you can be in charge of
keeping all her secrets, okay?
1043
00:53:23,287 --> 00:53:26,115
For example, she gave you
those high-heel shoes
just to make fun of you
1044
00:53:26,290 --> 00:53:29,206
because she knew
you wouldn'’t be able
to walk in them. Sorry!
1045
00:53:29,380 --> 00:53:32,034
Also, she says
she has a nose job,
1046
00:53:32,209 --> 00:53:33,601
but that'’s just to distract
from the fact
1047
00:53:33,775 --> 00:53:36,125
that she had one
of her ears moved!
1048
00:53:36,300 --> 00:53:38,824
Also, she totally cheats
on Aaron.
1049
00:53:38,998 --> 00:53:41,783
Yeah. Every Tuesday,
she says she has College Prep,
1050
00:53:41,957 --> 00:53:43,437
but really she'’s hooking up
with Shane Oman
1051
00:53:43,611 --> 00:53:45,309
in the third-floor
janitorial closet
1052
00:53:45,483 --> 00:53:48,137
on the bags of sawdust
that they use for barf!
1053
00:53:48,312 --> 00:53:50,314
And I never told anyone
1054
00:53:50,488 --> 00:53:52,490
because I'’m such
a good friend!
1055
00:53:54,666 --> 00:53:57,408
And I'’m only telling you
because you'’re such
a good friend.
1056
00:54:04,328 --> 00:54:06,068
♪ It'’s a revenge party ♪
1057
00:54:06,243 --> 00:54:07,766
♪ A party that ends ♪
1058
00:54:07,940 --> 00:54:10,508
♪ With somebody'’s head
On a spike!♪
1059
00:54:10,682 --> 00:54:13,554
♪ A revenge party
With your two best friends ♪
1060
00:54:13,728 --> 00:54:17,297
♪ It'’s like a party
With revenge
Is what it'’s like ♪
1061
00:54:36,360 --> 00:54:38,362
♪ A party with revenge
Is what it'’s like ♪
1062
00:54:39,580 --> 00:54:42,583
♪ A party with revenge ♪
1063
00:54:42,757 --> 00:54:46,761
♪ With revenge ♪
1064
00:54:46,935 --> 00:54:48,154
♪ Is what it'’s like! ♪
1065
00:55:00,949 --> 00:55:03,735
Hey, do you have time to go
over derivatives for a minute?
1066
00:55:04,518 --> 00:55:06,651
Oh, um... no, not today.
1067
00:55:09,349 --> 00:55:10,350
Cady?
1068
00:55:12,700 --> 00:55:14,441
Um...
1069
00:55:14,615 --> 00:55:16,748
You'’ve failed
your last five quizzes.
Is everything okay?
1070
00:55:16,922 --> 00:55:19,403
I'’m... I'’m sorry.
I'’ll just try harder.
1071
00:55:19,577 --> 00:55:21,187
Okay, because
if you need extra help,
1072
00:55:21,361 --> 00:55:23,276
there'’s a Mathletes meeting
starting in a couple minutes.
1073
00:55:23,450 --> 00:55:25,583
I can'’t. I'’m sorry.
I have to go
to my friend Regina'’s house.
1074
00:55:25,757 --> 00:55:27,672
We'’re doing a dance
in the talent show.
1075
00:55:27,846 --> 00:55:30,065
"Rockin'’ Around
- the Pole"?
- Yeah, how did you know?
1076
00:55:30,239 --> 00:55:32,024
They do it every year.
It'’s like a...
1077
00:55:32,198 --> 00:55:33,852
- Tradition?
- Recurring nightmare.
1078
00:55:35,114 --> 00:55:37,508
Okay, I could probably
get Kevin to tutor you.
1079
00:55:37,682 --> 00:55:39,510
Well, Aaron'’s tutoring me now,
so...
1080
00:55:39,684 --> 00:55:42,208
Oh, he'’s tutoring you?
Sure, okay, well,
1081
00:55:42,382 --> 00:55:44,602
let Aaron know that the weird
thing with your quizzes
1082
00:55:44,776 --> 00:55:47,779
is that all the work is right
and only the answers are wrong.
1083
00:55:47,953 --> 00:55:50,172
- Huh.
- Huh.
1084
00:55:50,347 --> 00:55:53,175
Cady, I am not gonna
stop pushing you,
because I'’m a pusher.
1085
00:55:53,350 --> 00:55:55,395
And I know you'’re smarter
than this.
1086
00:55:55,569 --> 00:55:59,791
Maybe I should just push
your seat away from Aaron'’s.
1087
00:55:59,965 --> 00:56:02,750
Ugh! And she was like,
"I'’m a pusher, Cady.
I'’m a pusher."
1088
00:56:02,924 --> 00:56:05,100
Wait, what does she even mean,
she'’s a "pusher"?
1089
00:56:05,274 --> 00:56:09,540
- Like a drug pusher?
- I don'’t know.
She'’s so weird.
1090
00:56:09,714 --> 00:56:12,456
Let it all out, honey.
Put it in the book.
1091
00:56:15,241 --> 00:56:17,374
Look at this thing!
1092
00:56:18,940 --> 00:56:21,900
- I can'’t even see it.
- It'’s sexy,
like a face breast.
1093
00:56:22,074 --> 00:56:25,425
It happens to me, too.
It'’s just the Kaälteen bars
flushing your toxins.
1094
00:56:25,599 --> 00:56:26,948
Huh. Okay.
1095
00:56:27,122 --> 00:56:29,124
Well, this skin stuff
you gave me sucks!
1096
00:56:29,777 --> 00:56:31,083
Where did you get it?
1097
00:56:40,527 --> 00:56:41,615
The Paris airport.
1098
00:56:41,789 --> 00:56:42,964
Oh, "the Paris airport."
1099
00:56:43,138 --> 00:56:44,923
Well, it'’s garbage.
And so are you.
1100
00:56:47,839 --> 00:56:50,232
She'’s just grouchy
because Aaron
broke up with her.
1101
00:56:50,407 --> 00:56:51,799
He did?
1102
00:56:51,973 --> 00:56:53,453
Someone told him
about Shane.
1103
00:56:54,367 --> 00:56:56,021
Do you think it was Santa?
1104
00:56:57,152 --> 00:56:59,067
Oh...
1105
00:56:59,241 --> 00:57:01,853
Also,
all that she'’s been eating
are those Kaälteen bars,
1106
00:57:02,027 --> 00:57:03,898
and I don'’t think she'’s pooped
in, like, two weeks.
1107
00:57:04,072 --> 00:57:05,596
Uh...
1108
00:57:05,770 --> 00:57:07,424
Hey, G, we'’ve practiced
a bunch with Cady.
1109
00:57:07,598 --> 00:57:08,642
You want to run it once?
1110
00:57:08,816 --> 00:57:10,775
Why? I'’m perfect every year.
1111
00:57:10,949 --> 00:57:12,254
Mm-hmm.
1112
00:57:12,429 --> 00:57:14,474
Yeah, but it'’s,
uh, Cady'’s first time
1113
00:57:14,648 --> 00:57:16,476
and there'’s a bunch
of traffic patterns...
1114
00:57:16,650 --> 00:57:19,305
Stop playing with
that stupid babyish book!
1115
00:57:25,529 --> 00:57:28,445
♪ All things are meant to be ♪
1116
00:57:28,619 --> 00:57:30,272
♪ So ♪
1117
00:57:30,447 --> 00:57:32,318
♪ Give me your best ♪
1118
00:57:33,406 --> 00:57:35,234
♪ And leave me ♪
1119
00:57:35,408 --> 00:57:36,888
♪ The rest ♪
1120
00:57:39,020 --> 00:57:42,502
♪ Leave it all to me ♪
1121
00:57:43,677 --> 00:57:45,636
♪ Leave it all to me ♪
1122
00:57:47,464 --> 00:57:51,163
♪ Leave it all to me ♪
1123
00:57:51,337 --> 00:57:54,775
♪ Leave it all ♪
1124
00:57:54,949 --> 00:57:56,560
♪ To ♪
1125
00:57:57,909 --> 00:58:02,479
♪ Me ♪
1126
00:58:04,437 --> 00:58:06,483
Uh, that was
Damian Hubbard singing...
1127
00:58:06,657 --> 00:58:08,963
...the iCarly theme song
1128
00:58:09,137 --> 00:58:10,617
in French for extra credit.
1129
00:58:10,791 --> 00:58:11,792
Yeah!
1130
00:58:13,490 --> 00:58:15,796
Our next act describes
their music
1131
00:58:15,970 --> 00:58:19,191
as "Like a sine wave,
they don'’t stop."
1132
00:58:19,365 --> 00:58:22,629
Please welcome Kevin G
and the Power of Three.
1133
00:58:22,803 --> 00:58:24,849
Uh. Yeah.
1134
00:58:25,023 --> 00:58:27,199
♪ All you ♪
1135
00:58:27,373 --> 00:58:29,331
♪ Suckah emcees
Ain'’t got nothin'’ on me ♪
1136
00:58:29,506 --> 00:58:31,595
♪ From my grades to my rhymes
You can'’t touch Kevin G ♪
1137
00:58:31,769 --> 00:58:32,857
♪ I'’m a Mathlete ♪
1138
00:58:33,031 --> 00:58:34,859
♪ So good under pressure ♪
1139
00:58:35,033 --> 00:58:36,687
♪ I'’ma find acute angles
To prioritize your pleasure ♪
1140
00:58:36,861 --> 00:58:39,080
♪ I'’m a Model UN rep
Out in these streets ♪
1141
00:58:39,254 --> 00:58:41,300
♪ But I'’m a overachiever
Under the sheets ♪
1142
00:58:41,474 --> 00:58:43,911
♪ She be like
"Uhhhh, Kevin G!"♪
1143
00:58:44,085 --> 00:58:45,391
Inappropriate.
1144
00:58:45,565 --> 00:58:46,914
Kevin, we talked about this.
1145
00:58:47,088 --> 00:58:49,395
Well,
happy holidays, everybody.
1146
00:58:51,745 --> 00:58:54,139
Why is this so tight?
1147
00:58:54,313 --> 00:58:55,880
You'’ve had it
since the sixth grade.
1148
00:58:56,054 --> 00:58:57,969
You'’re probably maturing.
1149
00:58:58,143 --> 00:59:00,754
Um, do you just,
like, want to run it one time
real quick?
1150
00:59:00,928 --> 00:59:04,105
Gretchen,
literally no one cares.
1151
00:59:04,279 --> 00:59:06,238
Mm-hmm. No, totally.
1152
00:59:06,412 --> 00:59:08,501
Um, do you just want
to run the acro?
1153
00:59:08,675 --> 00:59:10,677
Because none of us really does
gymnastics anymore
1154
00:59:10,851 --> 00:59:12,897
and when we made up this dance,
we all weighed, like, 70 pounds,
1155
00:59:13,071 --> 00:59:16,030
so maybe we should
just make sure everyone'’s
center of gravity is still...
1156
00:59:16,204 --> 00:59:17,336
Still what?
1157
00:59:18,598 --> 00:59:19,512
Nothing.
1158
00:59:27,041 --> 00:59:30,567
Thank you,
Shelby and Timmy, for tapping.
1159
00:59:30,741 --> 00:59:32,612
Also, if anyone finds
a retainer
1160
00:59:32,786 --> 00:59:35,876
in a bright aqua case,
that is mine.
1161
00:59:36,050 --> 00:59:37,399
Please return it.
1162
00:59:37,574 --> 00:59:39,576
My insurance won'’t cover
a replacement.
1163
00:59:40,925 --> 00:59:42,666
Karen, I can see your bra.
1164
00:59:42,840 --> 00:59:44,581
It'’s on purpose.
I'’m going for a look.
1165
00:59:44,755 --> 00:59:46,408
Is it "girl
who slept with 11 people"?
1166
00:59:46,583 --> 00:59:47,671
'’Cause you'’re nailing it.
1167
00:59:49,629 --> 00:59:52,458
- I think your top is fetch.
- Gretchen!
1168
00:59:52,632 --> 00:59:54,460
Stop trying
to make "fetch" happen.
1169
00:59:54,634 --> 00:59:57,463
It'’s not going to happen.
1170
01:00:01,206 --> 01:00:03,774
Okay,
please welcome Santa'’s Helpers
1171
01:00:03,948 --> 01:00:05,732
doing "Rockin'’
Around the Pole."
1172
01:00:15,873 --> 01:00:18,092
♪ We'’re gonna
Take a Christmas train ♪
1173
01:00:18,266 --> 01:00:20,181
♪ To where Santa lives ♪
1174
01:00:20,355 --> 01:00:23,315
♪ Up through the sleet
And snow ♪
1175
01:00:23,489 --> 01:00:26,666
♪ Then we'’ll hop and bop
Straight to the top ♪
1176
01:00:26,840 --> 01:00:29,451
♪ Last stop the North Pole ♪
1177
01:00:31,540 --> 01:00:34,935
♪ And we'’ll be rock, rock
Rockin'’ around the pole ♪
1178
01:00:35,109 --> 01:00:37,938
♪ Where the northern lights
Are bright ♪
1179
01:00:38,112 --> 01:00:41,638
♪ Rock, rock, rockin'’
Around the pole ♪
1180
01:00:41,812 --> 01:00:44,771
♪ We'’ll rock that pole
All night ♪
1181
01:00:44,945 --> 01:00:47,948
♪ And we'’ll be sing, sing
Singin'’ a Christmas tune ♪
1182
01:00:48,122 --> 01:00:49,602
Thank you, next!
1183
01:00:51,386 --> 01:00:54,999
♪ Yeah, we'’ll be rock
Rock, rockin'’ up on that pole ♪
1184
01:00:55,173 --> 01:00:57,958
♪ Rockin'’ till the break
Of day ♪
1185
01:00:58,132 --> 01:01:01,005
♪ Yeah, we'’ll be rockin'’
Stuffin'’ a stockin'’♪
1186
01:01:01,179 --> 01:01:04,182
♪ And they'’ll be talkin'’
About us in town ♪
1187
01:01:04,356 --> 01:01:06,445
♪ Yeah, we'’ll be rockin'’ ♪
1188
01:01:06,619 --> 01:01:08,316
♪ And rollin'’ and lockin'’
And strollin'’♪
1189
01:01:08,490 --> 01:01:11,885
♪ Till the North Pole police
Come shut us down ♪
1190
01:01:33,820 --> 01:01:36,736
So, I went
to the Christmas show
and it was a mess, y'’all.
1191
01:01:36,910 --> 01:01:38,564
Regina ate total shit.
1192
01:01:38,738 --> 01:01:40,305
I think people saw her nipple.
1193
01:01:40,479 --> 01:01:41,610
It'’s just unprofessional.
1194
01:01:41,785 --> 01:01:43,221
This was kind of hilarious.
1195
01:01:45,571 --> 01:01:47,094
I'’ve watched
1196
01:01:47,268 --> 01:01:50,489
this video a thousand times. Gretchen piledrived Regina.
1197
01:01:50,663 --> 01:01:52,143
Regina really should be
lifting through her glutes.
1198
01:01:52,317 --> 01:01:54,188
Regina challenge!
1199
01:01:54,362 --> 01:01:55,799
You know
what that bitch gets?
1200
01:01:55,973 --> 01:01:57,191
Not my sympathy.
1201
01:01:57,365 --> 01:01:58,671
It'’s not like
we like Regina anyway.
1202
01:01:58,845 --> 01:02:00,542
She'’s such a bitch.
She'’s so spoiled.
1203
01:02:00,717 --> 01:02:02,806
Regina always wanted
to be the center of attention.
1204
01:02:02,980 --> 01:02:04,982
Girl, we all see you.
1205
01:02:05,156 --> 01:02:07,027
Regina got what she deserves.
1206
01:02:07,201 --> 01:02:08,855
But you know, that Cady girl
was kind of cute.
1207
01:02:09,029 --> 01:02:09,943
You know, she stayed,
she waved.
1208
01:02:10,117 --> 01:02:12,337
She ate, like, house down.
1209
01:02:12,511 --> 01:02:14,252
Cady Heron was the only one
that acted normal.
1210
01:02:14,426 --> 01:02:15,775
Oh, yeah.I think she salvaged
1211
01:02:15,949 --> 01:02:17,472
the worst tradition
of the year.
1212
01:02:17,646 --> 01:02:19,431
Period. She was... She'’s kind of hot.
1213
01:02:19,605 --> 01:02:21,433
She might even be hotter
than Regina George.
1214
01:02:21,607 --> 01:02:24,305
No zits. Gum health.
American Eagle.
1215
01:02:24,479 --> 01:02:25,916
Cady doesn'’t even have
to wear deodorant.
1216
01:02:26,090 --> 01:02:27,526
I'’m thinking of going red.
1217
01:02:27,700 --> 01:02:28,962
Okay, so, somebody sent me
this look, and I was like,
1218
01:02:29,136 --> 01:02:31,486
"Hot girls,
we are going back to red!
1219
01:02:32,879 --> 01:02:34,576
Thank you, Cady Heron.
1220
01:02:34,751 --> 01:02:36,361
Cady was looking good.
1221
01:02:37,884 --> 01:02:39,146
Caddy!
1222
01:02:40,147 --> 01:02:41,670
Did you hear me?
1223
01:02:41,845 --> 01:02:44,238
- What?
- We did it.
1224
01:02:44,412 --> 01:02:45,718
Regina lost
her hot boyfriend.
1225
01:02:45,892 --> 01:02:47,154
She lost her status
over everyone.
1226
01:02:47,328 --> 01:02:48,765
She popped her blemish
against the stage floor.
1227
01:02:48,939 --> 01:02:50,201
That'’s rock bottom.
1228
01:02:51,158 --> 01:02:53,160
We can stop. We'’re even.
1229
01:02:53,334 --> 01:02:55,075
Finally you don'’t have
to talk to them anymore.
1230
01:02:55,249 --> 01:02:57,338
We can finally
have lunch together tomorrow.
1231
01:02:57,512 --> 01:02:58,949
I'’m getting dumplings.
1232
01:02:59,123 --> 01:03:00,733
Unless they have pizza bagels,
then I might get both.
1233
01:03:00,907 --> 01:03:02,474
- So good.
- I can'’t.
1234
01:03:04,737 --> 01:03:06,608
I need one more lunch.
1235
01:03:30,371 --> 01:03:33,026
I'’m sorry, Regina.
You can'’t sit with us.
1236
01:03:35,289 --> 01:03:36,813
What?
1237
01:03:38,118 --> 01:03:40,686
You'’re wearing sweatpants.
It'’s Thursday.
1238
01:03:41,774 --> 01:03:43,384
Whatever.
Those rules aren'’t real.
1239
01:03:43,558 --> 01:03:44,951
They were real
that day I wore a vest.
1240
01:03:45,125 --> 01:03:46,561
Yeah, because that vest
was disgusting!
1241
01:03:46,735 --> 01:03:48,955
You can'’t sit with us!
1242
01:04:01,968 --> 01:04:04,275
These sweatpants
are all that fit me right now.
1243
01:04:07,756 --> 01:04:08,932
What do you think, Cady?
1244
01:04:16,026 --> 01:04:19,768
Sorry, Regina.
Rules are rules.
1245
01:04:21,814 --> 01:04:22,859
Fine.
1246
01:04:25,252 --> 01:04:28,081
Oh.
1247
01:04:30,475 --> 01:04:32,390
Take a picture, losers.
It'’ll last longer.
1248
01:04:41,094 --> 01:04:42,704
And that......was the beginning...
1249
01:04:42,879 --> 01:04:43,575
...of the......mother#*#*#*#*#*#*#*
1250
01:04:43,749 --> 01:04:45,229
...end.
1251
01:04:48,928 --> 01:04:50,321
Hello,
may I have your attention
1252
01:04:50,495 --> 01:04:51,888
for this morning'’s
announcements?
1253
01:04:53,454 --> 01:04:55,065
In honor
of Women'’s History Month,
1254
01:04:55,239 --> 01:04:58,633
the cafeteria is offering
vegan "Confident Joannes"
1255
01:04:58,807 --> 01:05:01,201
which are Sloppy Joes
made of beans.
1256
01:05:03,464 --> 01:05:05,205
Secondly, we want
to wish good luck
1257
01:05:05,379 --> 01:05:07,555
to junior, Janis '’Imi'’ike...
1258
01:05:07,729 --> 01:05:09,035
...who is a finalist
1259
01:05:09,209 --> 01:05:11,559
in the Illinois Art Expo
this Saturday.
1260
01:05:11,733 --> 01:05:14,040
Go, Lions! Even for Art.
1261
01:05:14,214 --> 01:05:15,868
Art, art, art! Next up,
1262
01:05:16,042 --> 01:05:18,262
the Students Activities
Committee voted,
1263
01:05:18,436 --> 01:05:20,090
and the theme for
this year'’s Spring Fling...
1264
01:05:20,264 --> 01:05:22,527
- What'’s that lip color?
- Oh, it'’s e.l.f. O Face in...
1265
01:05:22,701 --> 01:05:24,050
No, amazing, yeah.
1266
01:05:24,224 --> 01:05:25,747
I was just making sure
your ears still worked.
1267
01:05:25,922 --> 01:05:30,404
And finally, the nominees for
Spring Fling King and Queen
1268
01:05:30,578 --> 01:05:31,797
are as follows:
1269
01:05:31,971 --> 01:05:33,973
For King, Aaron Samuels,
1270
01:05:34,147 --> 01:05:36,933
Christian Wiggins
and Shane Oman.
1271
01:05:37,107 --> 01:05:39,065
And Damian Hubbard. What?
1272
01:05:40,153 --> 01:05:41,459
For Queen...
1273
01:05:41,633 --> 01:05:42,939
...Regina George...
1274
01:05:43,113 --> 01:05:45,506
...Karen Shetty
and Gretchen Wieners.
1275
01:05:45,680 --> 01:05:47,726
Same old, same old. And Caddy Heron.
1276
01:05:50,816 --> 01:05:51,991
Wow.
1277
01:05:52,165 --> 01:05:53,036
Wait, my mistake.
1278
01:05:55,690 --> 01:05:56,996
Cady Heron.
1279
01:06:01,305 --> 01:06:02,654
Oh, my God.
1280
01:06:02,828 --> 01:06:06,092
Oh, my God,
so many people are texting me.
1281
01:06:06,266 --> 01:06:08,660
Should I, um, text Aaron
and congratulate him?
1282
01:06:08,834 --> 01:06:10,009
No.
1283
01:06:10,183 --> 01:06:11,837
Hey, do you want a lift
this weekend?
1284
01:06:12,011 --> 01:06:13,882
'’Cause Damian'’s borrowing
his grandma'’s Jazzy.
1285
01:06:14,057 --> 01:06:15,536
A lift to what?
1286
01:06:17,147 --> 01:06:19,540
My art show.
Didn'’t you just hear
Mr. Duvall talking about it?
1287
01:06:19,714 --> 01:06:22,413
- Oh, that'’s this weekend?
- Yeah.
1288
01:06:22,587 --> 01:06:26,286
Oh, shoot.
I have tickets to this thing
in Madison with my mom.
1289
01:06:26,460 --> 01:06:27,635
Uh, I'’m sorry.
1290
01:06:29,724 --> 01:06:32,336
Yeah, you seem
super sad about it.
1291
01:06:35,165 --> 01:06:37,254
So, what are we doing
this weekend?
1292
01:06:37,428 --> 01:06:39,038
Why is everyone asking me
about the weekend?
1293
01:06:39,212 --> 01:06:40,518
It'’s Tuesday.
1294
01:06:40,692 --> 01:06:44,130
Yeah, the weekend is only...
several days away.
1295
01:06:44,304 --> 01:06:46,480
I have to go to this thing
in Madison with my mom.
1296
01:06:46,654 --> 01:06:48,265
Your mom is going away?
You should have people over.
1297
01:06:48,439 --> 01:06:50,049
No, I'’m going with her.
1298
01:06:50,223 --> 01:06:53,139
Well, if you have people over,
you can invite Aaron.
1299
01:06:56,534 --> 01:06:58,014
Huh.
1300
01:06:58,188 --> 01:06:59,711
Yeah, I guess
I could get out of it.
1301
01:06:59,885 --> 01:07:01,887
But, like,
1302
01:07:02,061 --> 01:07:05,238
we would keep it small, right?
Like five or six people?
1303
01:07:05,412 --> 01:07:06,718
- Yes!
- Sure!
1304
01:07:06,892 --> 01:07:09,373
Why are you doing this to me?!
1305
01:07:09,547 --> 01:07:12,289
I promised my friend Janis
I'’d go to her art show!
1306
01:07:12,463 --> 01:07:14,639
But, binti, we'’ve had
these tickets for months.
1307
01:07:14,813 --> 01:07:16,119
You love Neil deGrasse Tyson.
1308
01:07:16,293 --> 01:07:17,250
Mom!
1309
01:07:17,424 --> 01:07:19,687
Janis is my best friend!
1310
01:07:19,861 --> 01:07:21,515
Do you not want me
to be a good friend?!
1311
01:07:21,689 --> 01:07:22,995
No! Yes! What?
1312
01:07:23,169 --> 01:07:27,130
You can, uh, stay home
on your own, I guess.
1313
01:07:27,304 --> 01:07:29,480
Hey. I'’m having
a small get-together
1314
01:07:29,654 --> 01:07:32,570
at my house tomorrow night.
My mom'’s away, so...
1315
01:07:32,744 --> 01:07:33,919
Is Regina going?
1316
01:07:34,093 --> 01:07:36,530
No! Do you think
I'’m an idiot? No.
1317
01:07:36,704 --> 01:07:38,576
It'’s just gonna be
a few cool people,
1318
01:07:38,750 --> 01:07:40,404
and you better be
one of them, byotch.
1319
01:07:41,622 --> 01:07:43,450
Okay. I'’ll be there.
1320
01:08:01,599 --> 01:08:02,861
No, no, no!
1321
01:08:14,568 --> 01:08:16,222
Have you seen Aaron?
1322
01:08:16,396 --> 01:08:18,006
- What?
- Aaron!
1323
01:08:18,181 --> 01:08:19,660
Karen?
1324
01:08:20,879 --> 01:08:21,923
Hi.
1325
01:08:26,319 --> 01:08:28,234
Whoo!
1326
01:08:35,589 --> 01:08:37,069
I'’ve been looking for you.
1327
01:08:37,896 --> 01:08:39,419
Me as well.
1328
01:08:39,593 --> 01:08:42,335
I like your costume.
I mean, um, your dress.
1329
01:08:43,771 --> 01:08:45,556
Is this you holding
a crocodile?
1330
01:08:45,730 --> 01:08:48,385
Oh, my God,
don'’t look at that.
That is so embarrassing.
1331
01:08:48,559 --> 01:08:50,865
No, it'’s not. It'’s awesome.
1332
01:08:51,823 --> 01:08:52,998
You miss Kenya?
1333
01:08:53,172 --> 01:08:54,304
Yes.
1334
01:08:54,478 --> 01:08:56,044
No. I mean, I...
1335
01:08:57,133 --> 01:08:58,917
Well, I miss...
1336
01:08:59,091 --> 01:09:01,311
I could see
a lot more sky there.
1337
01:09:01,485 --> 01:09:02,747
At night.
1338
01:09:02,921 --> 01:09:05,880
My mom and I used
to map the constellations.
1339
01:09:06,707 --> 01:09:08,056
The stars.
1340
01:09:17,065 --> 01:09:18,719
You still on
the treadmill, honey?
1341
01:09:18,893 --> 01:09:20,460
No, I'’m over there.
1342
01:09:21,896 --> 01:09:25,117
You got any plans tonight?
It'’s Saturday.
1343
01:09:25,291 --> 01:09:27,641
Mom, don'’t bother me.
1344
01:09:27,815 --> 01:09:30,862
I know you'’re not
feeling your best
about your body right now,
1345
01:09:31,036 --> 01:09:34,996
but remember that real beauty
comes from the face.
1346
01:09:35,171 --> 01:09:38,609
Don'’t ever talk about my body!
1347
01:09:38,783 --> 01:09:40,741
Okay, okay.
1348
01:09:44,441 --> 01:09:47,835
Wait, honey, why are
you eating Kaälteen bars?
1349
01:09:48,009 --> 01:09:50,186
These are what
we gave Nana Joan
1350
01:09:50,360 --> 01:09:51,970
when we needed her
to gain weight.
1351
01:10:15,820 --> 01:10:17,604
I am drinking
1352
01:10:17,778 --> 01:10:19,693
not juice tonight.
1353
01:10:19,867 --> 01:10:21,652
I know. I can tell.
1354
01:10:22,609 --> 01:10:23,741
We should go downstairs.
1355
01:10:23,915 --> 01:10:26,309
No, no, no, sit down.
I'’m amazing.
1356
01:10:32,967 --> 01:10:36,188
I think you should wear
your hair however you want.
1357
01:10:36,362 --> 01:10:38,930
I think it looks good
both ways.
1358
01:10:42,760 --> 01:10:45,589
Thank you
for inviting me tonight.
1359
01:10:45,763 --> 01:10:48,418
I think
I'’ve spent too much time
being pissed at Regina.
1360
01:10:48,592 --> 01:10:50,028
Yeah, you really have.
1361
01:10:50,202 --> 01:10:53,118
- No more liars.
- I would never lie to you.
1362
01:10:54,728 --> 01:10:56,948
I mean,
I did lie to you once.
1363
01:10:57,122 --> 01:10:59,472
But you are totally
gonna laugh when I tell you.
1364
01:10:59,646 --> 01:11:00,908
Tell me what?
1365
01:11:01,082 --> 01:11:02,910
We'’re in here!
1366
01:11:08,264 --> 01:11:11,223
I pretended
to be bad at math
1367
01:11:11,397 --> 01:11:13,834
to get you to help me,
but I'’m not bad at math.
1368
01:11:14,008 --> 01:11:16,533
I'’m actually... I'’m actually
really good at math.
1369
01:11:16,707 --> 01:11:20,406
You'’re the one who'’s only
kind of okay at math.
1370
01:11:20,580 --> 01:11:22,713
Anyways, um,
now I'’m failing.
1371
01:11:22,887 --> 01:11:26,804
- So isn'’t that so dumb?
- That is dumb, yeah.
1372
01:11:27,979 --> 01:11:29,415
Why wouldn'’t you
just talk to me?
1373
01:11:29,589 --> 01:11:31,374
Because of Regina.
'’Cause you were her property.
1374
01:11:31,548 --> 01:11:33,376
- Her property?
- Shut up. Not her property.
1375
01:11:33,550 --> 01:11:34,768
Don'’t tell me to shut up.
1376
01:11:36,466 --> 01:11:38,729
What? Aaron, sit down.
1377
01:11:38,903 --> 01:11:40,513
You are a clone of Regina.
1378
01:11:43,429 --> 01:11:44,952
No. No, no, no!
1379
01:11:45,126 --> 01:11:47,433
What are you thinking about?
1380
01:11:47,607 --> 01:11:48,695
Chicken wings later.
1381
01:11:48,869 --> 01:11:50,175
Do you ever think about me?
1382
01:11:50,349 --> 01:11:53,047
Sometimes.
When I'’m looking right at you.
1383
01:12:01,534 --> 01:12:03,319
- Cady, Cady, Cady!
- No, no, no.
1384
01:12:07,540 --> 01:12:08,933
Aaron!
1385
01:12:09,107 --> 01:12:11,414
Aaron, wait!
1386
01:12:17,985 --> 01:12:19,770
You dirty little liar.
1387
01:12:20,814 --> 01:12:22,207
I... I can explain.
1388
01:12:22,381 --> 01:12:23,991
Explain how you'’re supposed
to be out of town
1389
01:12:24,165 --> 01:12:25,384
but there are
60 different people
1390
01:12:25,558 --> 01:12:27,212
posting pictures
from your party?
1391
01:12:27,386 --> 01:12:28,648
You know
I couldn'’t invite you.
1392
01:12:28,822 --> 01:12:30,563
I... I have to act
like I don'’t know you.
1393
01:12:30,737 --> 01:12:32,652
You are full of lies!
1394
01:12:32,826 --> 01:12:34,524
Janis, I cannot stop
this Jazzy.
1395
01:12:34,698 --> 01:12:35,786
You know I have a curfew!
1396
01:12:35,960 --> 01:12:37,788
You would hate this party.
1397
01:12:37,962 --> 01:12:39,442
Why? Aren'’t you having
an amazing time
1398
01:12:39,616 --> 01:12:40,965
with your amazing friends?
1399
01:12:41,139 --> 01:12:42,967
Janis, I can'’t spend
every minute with you.
1400
01:12:43,141 --> 01:12:44,969
It'’s not my fault you'’re like
obsessed with me or something!
1401
01:12:48,189 --> 01:12:51,628
- What?
- Oh, no, she didn'’t.
1402
01:12:51,802 --> 01:12:54,065
See, this is the problem
with you Plastics.
1403
01:12:54,239 --> 01:12:56,154
You think everyone
is obsessed with you
1404
01:12:56,328 --> 01:12:57,982
when actually
everybody hates you.
1405
01:12:58,156 --> 01:12:59,897
You made me like this.
1406
01:13:00,071 --> 01:13:02,160
It was your idea for me
to pretend to be Plastic!
1407
01:13:02,334 --> 01:13:03,857
Buddy, it'’s not pretend!
1408
01:13:04,031 --> 01:13:05,642
♪ You are as plastic
As they come ♪
1409
01:13:05,816 --> 01:13:07,252
♪ You think
Your shit don'’t stink ♪
1410
01:13:07,426 --> 01:13:08,819
♪ You think
The rest of us are dumb ♪
1411
01:13:08,993 --> 01:13:10,603
♪ I hate Regina'’s guts ♪
1412
01:13:10,777 --> 01:13:11,865
♪ But here'’s what
You don'’t comprehend ♪
1413
01:13:12,039 --> 01:13:13,432
♪ At least she has the guts ♪
1414
01:13:13,606 --> 01:13:15,695
♪ To not pretend
To be my friend!♪
1415
01:13:17,088 --> 01:13:17,958
Here.
1416
01:13:18,959 --> 01:13:22,049
- Have this. It won an award.
- Janis.
1417
01:13:22,223 --> 01:13:25,226
♪ No, it'’s fine ♪
1418
01:13:25,401 --> 01:13:28,316
♪ Really fine ♪
1419
01:13:28,491 --> 01:13:34,192
♪ Go be fine! ♪
1420
01:13:35,585 --> 01:13:37,369
And I want my pink shirt.
1421
01:14:16,147 --> 01:14:20,499
♪ My name is Regina George ♪
1422
01:14:21,631 --> 01:14:26,766
♪ And I am a massive deal ♪
1423
01:14:26,940 --> 01:14:32,598
♪ I will grind you to sand ♪
1424
01:14:32,772 --> 01:14:37,864
♪ Beneath my Louboutin-ed heel ♪
1425
01:14:38,038 --> 01:14:42,608
♪ This is what I get
For helping ♪
1426
01:14:42,782 --> 01:14:47,831
♪ Helping someone lame fit in ♪
1427
01:14:48,005 --> 01:14:50,355
♪ Cady Heron ♪
1428
01:14:50,529 --> 01:14:55,229
♪ Enjoy your temporary win ♪
1429
01:14:58,711 --> 01:15:02,715
♪ My name is Regina George ♪
1430
01:15:03,890 --> 01:15:09,156
♪ "This girl is a fugly cow" ♪
1431
01:15:09,330 --> 01:15:11,594
♪ Hey, Cady ♪
1432
01:15:11,768 --> 01:15:18,775
♪ How you like me now? ♪
1433
01:15:20,385 --> 01:15:22,605
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1434
01:15:22,779 --> 01:15:25,521
♪ I brought the gasoline ♪
1435
01:15:25,695 --> 01:15:27,523
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1436
01:15:27,697 --> 01:15:30,874
♪ And everyone get mean ♪
1437
01:15:31,048 --> 01:15:33,398
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1438
01:15:33,572 --> 01:15:35,618
♪ I got the gasoline ♪
1439
01:15:35,792 --> 01:15:38,142
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1440
01:15:38,316 --> 01:15:41,667
♪ And everyone get ♪
1441
01:15:41,841 --> 01:15:46,063
♪ Mean ♪
1442
01:16:02,558 --> 01:16:05,430
♪ Cady, time to
Watch your back ♪
1443
01:16:05,604 --> 01:16:07,911
♪ Cady, time to turn and cough ♪
1444
01:16:08,085 --> 01:16:10,740
♪ Because you took me down ♪
1445
01:16:10,914 --> 01:16:15,614
♪ But you didn'’t finish me off ♪
1446
01:16:18,574 --> 01:16:21,054
♪ My name is Regina George ♪
1447
01:16:21,228 --> 01:16:23,622
♪ And in case
You'’re keeping score ♪
1448
01:16:23,796 --> 01:16:25,972
♪ Cady may have won the battle ♪
1449
01:16:26,146 --> 01:16:28,714
♪ But I will win the war ♪
1450
01:16:30,673 --> 01:16:33,719
I'’m just so upset, Mr. Duvall.
1451
01:16:33,893 --> 01:16:35,286
We found it in the hallway.
1452
01:16:35,460 --> 01:16:37,767
I mean, the things
it says about me?
1453
01:16:37,941 --> 01:16:39,333
The things it says
about all of us?
1454
01:16:39,507 --> 01:16:41,161
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1455
01:16:41,335 --> 01:16:43,686
♪ Trang Pham
Is a grotsky byotch!♪
1456
01:16:45,905 --> 01:16:49,648
"Rachel Hamilton fills
her inhaler with vodka"?
1457
01:16:49,822 --> 01:16:52,085
I mean... does that work?
1458
01:16:54,479 --> 01:16:55,741
♪ I got the gasoline ♪
1459
01:16:55,915 --> 01:16:57,438
♪ Ms. Norbury'’s ♪
1460
01:16:57,613 --> 01:16:58,875
♪ A drug pusher! ♪ No, no, no. No!
1461
01:16:59,049 --> 01:17:02,095
"Ms. Norbury is a sad,
old drug pusher"?
1462
01:17:03,836 --> 01:17:06,578
"Haley Fralenger has" ...what?
1463
01:17:06,752 --> 01:17:07,884
- What'’s this?
- Hairy nips.
1464
01:17:09,755 --> 01:17:11,539
Good Lord.
1465
01:17:11,714 --> 01:17:14,586
♪ Mmm, I want
To make the world burn ♪
1466
01:17:14,760 --> 01:17:17,110
♪ Janis is a pyro-lez! ♪
1467
01:17:17,284 --> 01:17:19,504
Don'’t you worry.
We'’re gonna find out
who did this.
1468
01:17:19,678 --> 01:17:22,115
There'’s only three girls
in the whole school
who aren'’t in it.
1469
01:17:22,289 --> 01:17:24,857
♪ Regina is a fugly cow! ♪
1470
01:17:25,031 --> 01:17:27,338
♪ Regina is a fugly cow! ♪
1471
01:17:27,512 --> 01:17:29,209
♪ You wrote this ♪
1472
01:17:29,383 --> 01:17:32,604
♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa! ♪
1473
01:17:32,778 --> 01:17:35,085
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1474
01:17:35,259 --> 01:17:37,696
♪ I got the gasoline ♪
1475
01:17:37,870 --> 01:17:40,090
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1476
01:17:40,264 --> 01:17:43,049
♪ And everyone turn ♪
1477
01:17:43,223 --> 01:17:47,663
♪ Mean... Mean ♪
1478
01:17:47,837 --> 01:17:53,190
♪ Mean! ♪
1479
01:17:53,364 --> 01:17:55,409
"Damian Hubbard
is too gay to function"?
1480
01:17:55,583 --> 01:17:56,976
That is only okay
when I say it.
1481
01:17:57,150 --> 01:17:58,543
Only Cady could
have written that.
1482
01:18:03,417 --> 01:18:08,509
♪ I want to watch
The world burn ♪
1483
01:18:08,684 --> 01:18:12,688
♪ I want to make
The world turn ♪
1484
01:18:12,862 --> 01:18:18,128
♪ So mean! ♪
1485
01:18:18,302 --> 01:18:19,999
Oh, hell no!
1486
01:18:20,173 --> 01:18:24,003
I did not go
to graduate school for this.
1487
01:18:24,177 --> 01:18:29,182
♪ I want to watch
The world burn!♪
1488
01:18:29,356 --> 01:18:34,840
All junior girls report
to the gymnasium immediately!
1489
01:18:35,014 --> 01:18:36,624
Immediately!
1490
01:18:49,202 --> 01:18:52,249
Never in my 31 years
as an educator
1491
01:18:52,423 --> 01:18:54,120
have I seen such behavior.
1492
01:18:54,294 --> 01:18:57,210
I have half a mind to cancel
your Spring Fling dance!
1493
01:18:57,384 --> 01:18:59,299
- No!
- I object.
1494
01:19:01,214 --> 01:19:02,433
But we'’re not gonna do that
1495
01:19:02,607 --> 01:19:04,130
because we'’ve already paid
the DJ.
1496
01:19:04,304 --> 01:19:08,874
But I am taking
this "Burn Book" seriously.
1497
01:19:09,048 --> 01:19:10,920
Now who has something
to say about this?
1498
01:19:19,667 --> 01:19:20,843
Someone wrote in that book
1499
01:19:21,017 --> 01:19:22,061
that I'’m lying
about being a virgin
1500
01:19:22,235 --> 01:19:24,803
because I use
super-jumbo tampons.
1501
01:19:24,977 --> 01:19:27,066
But I can'’t help it
if I have a heavy flow
1502
01:19:27,240 --> 01:19:28,764
and a wideset vagina.
1503
01:19:28,938 --> 01:19:32,593
Okay. Thank you.
Hold that thought.
1504
01:19:33,899 --> 01:19:36,162
Sharon, you need
- to run this.
- Oh, come on.
1505
01:19:36,336 --> 01:19:37,773
I need to be able
to tell parents
1506
01:19:37,947 --> 01:19:40,036
that we fixed this,
and honestly,
1507
01:19:40,210 --> 01:19:41,777
you need to prove
whoever called you
1508
01:19:41,951 --> 01:19:45,041
a drug pusher
was just joking.
1509
01:19:45,215 --> 01:19:46,912
Okay, fine,
but you are walking the dogs
1510
01:19:47,086 --> 01:19:48,958
every morning
for the rest of the week.
1511
01:19:49,132 --> 01:19:50,568
Thank you. I love you.
1512
01:19:50,742 --> 01:19:52,265
I love you, too.
1513
01:19:57,705 --> 01:19:58,968
♪ Well ♪
1514
01:19:59,142 --> 01:20:00,708
Excuse me.
1515
01:20:02,275 --> 01:20:05,931
Well, okay, hotshots,
1516
01:20:06,802 --> 01:20:08,281
who wrote all this junk?
1517
01:20:10,980 --> 01:20:11,894
Cady?
1518
01:20:12,895 --> 01:20:14,461
Any ideas?
1519
01:20:16,899 --> 01:20:17,725
No.
1520
01:20:17,900 --> 01:20:19,379
Interesting.
1521
01:20:19,553 --> 01:20:21,120
Um, can I just say,
1522
01:20:21,294 --> 01:20:23,209
I don'’t think we have a clique
problem at this school?
1523
01:20:23,383 --> 01:20:25,472
And some of us
shouldn'’t have to participate
1524
01:20:25,646 --> 01:20:27,474
in whatever this is,
1525
01:20:27,648 --> 01:20:29,476
um, just because
of a few bad people.
1526
01:20:29,650 --> 01:20:31,827
"A few bad people."Mm-hmm.
1527
01:20:32,001 --> 01:20:35,787
Okay.
Well, let'’s unpack that.
1528
01:20:35,961 --> 01:20:38,137
I want everybody
to close your eyes.
1529
01:20:40,487 --> 01:20:41,749
And I want you
to raise your hand
1530
01:20:41,924 --> 01:20:43,664
if you have ever had
a girl say something bad
1531
01:20:43,839 --> 01:20:45,057
about you behind your back.
1532
01:20:47,059 --> 01:20:49,235
Open your eyes.
1533
01:20:52,369 --> 01:20:54,066
Now close them again.
1534
01:20:54,240 --> 01:20:56,503
This time I want you
to raise your hand
1535
01:20:56,677 --> 01:20:58,505
if you have ever said
something bad
1536
01:20:58,679 --> 01:21:00,333
about a friend
behind her back.
1537
01:21:09,342 --> 01:21:10,822
Open your eyes.
1538
01:21:14,260 --> 01:21:15,392
Hmm.
1539
01:21:15,566 --> 01:21:17,133
Seems like maybe
we could take a break
1540
01:21:17,307 --> 01:21:20,092
from being victims
in this situation
1541
01:21:20,266 --> 01:21:21,920
and start taking
responsibility
1542
01:21:22,094 --> 01:21:23,922
for our own actions.
1543
01:21:24,096 --> 01:21:26,316
Okay, we'’re gonna write out
some apologies
1544
01:21:26,490 --> 01:21:28,535
to people that we'’ve hurt
in our lives.
1545
01:21:28,709 --> 01:21:30,059
Everybody up.
1546
01:21:32,844 --> 01:21:34,977
I'’m gonna kill you.
1547
01:21:35,151 --> 01:21:37,849
'’Cause one thing
I know for sure, guys:
1548
01:21:38,023 --> 01:21:41,809
Calling someone "ugly" is not
gonna make you better looking.
1549
01:21:41,984 --> 01:21:45,378
Calling somebody else "stupid"
does not make you any smarter.
1550
01:21:45,552 --> 01:21:48,033
And we as women have
to be able to trust
1551
01:21:48,207 --> 01:21:50,644
and support each other.
1552
01:21:50,818 --> 01:21:51,863
Like this.
1553
01:21:55,649 --> 01:21:57,129
Okay, that was good.
That was really good.
1554
01:21:57,303 --> 01:21:59,436
That could have
really backfired.
1555
01:21:59,610 --> 01:22:01,133
Alyssa,
1556
01:22:01,307 --> 01:22:02,874
I'’m sorry I said you look
like you comb your hair
1557
01:22:03,048 --> 01:22:04,049
with a chicken bone.
1558
01:22:05,921 --> 01:22:07,923
I know you'’re vegetarian.
1559
01:22:11,665 --> 01:22:14,538
Gretchen, I'’m sorry I
laughed at you that time
you got diarrhea
1560
01:22:14,712 --> 01:22:16,714
on the Ferris wheel.
1561
01:22:16,888 --> 01:22:18,846
And I'’m sorry
for repeating it now.
1562
01:22:19,021 --> 01:22:20,936
And I'’m sorry to the people
who were below us.
1563
01:22:24,243 --> 01:22:25,375
Soona,
1564
01:22:25,549 --> 01:22:27,159
I'’m sorry I said
you were dragging
1565
01:22:27,333 --> 01:22:29,292
during "Revenge Party."
1566
01:22:29,466 --> 01:22:31,120
There was just, like,
so much pressure on us
1567
01:22:31,294 --> 01:22:32,948
to move the story forward
through montage.
1568
01:22:33,122 --> 01:22:34,079
Like, you know how it is.
1569
01:22:34,253 --> 01:22:36,560
What is going on?
1570
01:22:36,734 --> 01:22:37,909
Don'’t worry about it.
1571
01:22:38,083 --> 01:22:39,998
I just wish
we could all get along
1572
01:22:40,172 --> 01:22:42,174
like we used to
in elementary school.
1573
01:22:42,348 --> 01:22:44,655
I wish
I could bake a cake
1574
01:22:44,829 --> 01:22:48,050
made out of rainbows
and smiles.
1575
01:22:48,224 --> 01:22:50,617
Then we could all eat it
and be happy.
1576
01:22:50,791 --> 01:22:53,011
She don'’t even go here!
1577
01:22:54,273 --> 01:22:55,840
Do you go to this school?
1578
01:22:56,014 --> 01:22:58,538
I'’m here for a track meet.
1579
01:22:58,712 --> 01:23:00,888
I just have a lot of feelings!
1580
01:23:01,063 --> 01:23:02,890
Okay, sweetheart,
you got to go home.
1581
01:23:03,065 --> 01:23:05,067
Okay.
1582
01:23:05,241 --> 01:23:06,633
Come on, we'’re gonna... Oh, thank you.
1583
01:23:06,807 --> 01:23:08,287
...we'’re gonna call
your grown-up.
1584
01:23:09,027 --> 01:23:10,463
My turn, I guess.
1585
01:23:10,637 --> 01:23:12,465
Watch, this is either gonna be
some really crappy art
1586
01:23:12,639 --> 01:23:13,858
or really good fire.
1587
01:23:21,431 --> 01:23:23,128
Okay, sure.
1588
01:23:23,302 --> 01:23:25,043
I have an apology.
1589
01:23:26,523 --> 01:23:28,394
My friend and I thought
it would be fun
1590
01:23:28,568 --> 01:23:31,267
to mess up
Regina George'’s life.
1591
01:23:31,441 --> 01:23:33,530
So we got
these candy-bar things
1592
01:23:33,704 --> 01:23:35,184
to make her gain weight...
1593
01:23:35,358 --> 01:23:38,013
...and we told her lard
was face cream.
1594
01:23:39,579 --> 01:23:42,582
And we turned her best friends
against her.
1595
01:23:43,627 --> 01:23:45,194
And then my friend Cady...
1596
01:23:45,368 --> 01:23:47,805
Yeah, you all know
my friend Cady.
1597
01:23:47,979 --> 01:23:52,897
She got Regina'’s boyfriend
to dump her!
1598
01:23:53,071 --> 01:23:54,594
Oh!
1599
01:23:54,768 --> 01:23:55,987
And it turns out,
1600
01:23:56,161 --> 01:23:57,815
Cady'’s actually
just as selfish
1601
01:23:57,989 --> 01:24:00,644
and phony as Regina George.
1602
01:24:02,298 --> 01:24:04,300
So this apology is to myself.
1603
01:24:05,649 --> 01:24:07,390
Because I should'’ve
known better.
1604
01:24:09,131 --> 01:24:10,567
♪ So your best friend
Screwed you over ♪
1605
01:24:10,741 --> 01:24:12,308
♪ Acted nice when
She'’s not nice ♪
1606
01:24:12,482 --> 01:24:14,266
♪ Well, I have some advice ♪
1607
01:24:14,440 --> 01:24:16,225
♪ '’Cause it'’s happened
To me twice ♪
1608
01:24:16,399 --> 01:24:19,532
♪ Here'’s my secret strategy
It always works because ♪
1609
01:24:19,706 --> 01:24:22,405
♪ The world doesn'’t end
It just feels like it does ♪
1610
01:24:22,579 --> 01:24:25,625
♪ Just raise your right finger ♪
1611
01:24:25,799 --> 01:24:29,977
♪ And solemnly swear ♪
1612
01:24:30,152 --> 01:24:33,155
♪ Whatever they say about me ♪
1613
01:24:33,329 --> 01:24:36,680
♪ I don'’t care ♪
1614
01:24:36,854 --> 01:24:38,551
♪ I won'’t twist in knots
To join your game ♪
1615
01:24:38,725 --> 01:24:40,684
♪ I will say
"You make me mad"♪
1616
01:24:40,858 --> 01:24:43,600
♪ And if you treat me bad
I'’ll say, "You'’re bad"♪
1617
01:24:43,774 --> 01:24:45,558
♪ If I eat alone
From this moment on ♪
1618
01:24:45,732 --> 01:24:47,517
♪ That'’s just what I'’ll do ♪
1619
01:24:47,691 --> 01:24:50,650
♪ '’Cause I'’d rather be me
I'’d rather be me ♪
1620
01:24:50,824 --> 01:24:53,218
♪ I'’d rather be me ♪
1621
01:24:53,392 --> 01:24:55,742
♪ Than be with you ♪
1622
01:25:01,400 --> 01:25:02,967
♪ We'’re supposed
To all be ladies ♪
1623
01:25:03,141 --> 01:25:04,838
♪ And be nurturing and care ♪
1624
01:25:05,012 --> 01:25:06,492
♪ Is that really fair? ♪
1625
01:25:06,666 --> 01:25:08,277
♪ Boys get to fight
We have to share ♪
1626
01:25:08,451 --> 01:25:09,452
♪ Here'’s the way that
That turns out ♪
1627
01:25:09,626 --> 01:25:11,628
♪ We always understand ♪
1628
01:25:11,802 --> 01:25:14,587
♪ How to slap someone down
With our underhand ♪
1629
01:25:14,761 --> 01:25:18,374
♪ So here is my right finger ♪
1630
01:25:18,548 --> 01:25:21,942
♪ To how girls should behave ♪
1631
01:25:22,117 --> 01:25:25,511
♪ '’Cause sometimes
What'’s meant to break you ♪
1632
01:25:25,685 --> 01:25:28,949
♪ Makes you brave ♪
1633
01:25:29,124 --> 01:25:32,214
♪ So I will not act all innocent
I won'’t fake apologize ♪
1634
01:25:32,388 --> 01:25:33,998
♪ Let'’s just fight
And then make up ♪
1635
01:25:34,172 --> 01:25:35,913
♪ Not tell these lies ♪
1636
01:25:36,087 --> 01:25:37,654
♪ Let'’s call our damage even ♪
1637
01:25:37,828 --> 01:25:39,743
♪ Clean the slate
Till it'’s like new ♪
1638
01:25:39,917 --> 01:25:42,963
♪ It'’s a new life for me
Where I'’d rather be me ♪
1639
01:25:43,138 --> 01:25:45,444
♪ I'’d rather be me ♪
1640
01:25:45,618 --> 01:25:47,751
♪ Than be with you ♪
1641
01:25:49,666 --> 01:25:51,320
♪ I'’ll say, "No"♪ No! ♪
1642
01:25:51,494 --> 01:25:52,843
♪ I'’ll say, "Knock it off
With your notes ♪
1643
01:25:53,017 --> 01:25:55,237
♪ And your rules
And your games"♪
1644
01:25:55,411 --> 01:25:57,108
♪ And those sycophants
Who follow you
I'’ll remember all their names ♪
1645
01:25:57,282 --> 01:26:00,416
♪ And when they drag you down
Like they inevitably do ♪
1646
01:26:00,590 --> 01:26:02,200
♪ I will not laugh along
With them ♪
1647
01:26:02,374 --> 01:26:03,549
♪ And approve
Their palace coup ♪
1648
01:26:03,723 --> 01:26:05,290
♪ '’Cause that'’s not me ♪
1649
01:26:07,553 --> 01:26:08,989
♪ I don'’t need
Their good opinions ♪
1650
01:26:09,164 --> 01:26:11,166
♪ I'’ve got plenty of opinions ♪
1651
01:26:11,340 --> 01:26:14,386
♪ Every asshole has opinions
But it doesn'’t make '’em true ♪
1652
01:26:14,560 --> 01:26:17,824
♪ What'’s true is being me
And I'’d rather be me ♪
1653
01:26:17,998 --> 01:26:20,349
♪ I'’d rather be me ♪
1654
01:26:20,523 --> 01:26:22,829
♪ Than be with you ♪
1655
01:26:24,527 --> 01:26:28,095
♪ So raise '’em high
'’Cause playing nice and shy ♪
1656
01:26:28,270 --> 01:26:32,622
♪ Is insulting my IQ ♪
1657
01:26:32,796 --> 01:26:36,060
♪ I'’d rather be me
I'’d rather be me ♪
1658
01:26:36,234 --> 01:26:39,455
♪ I'’d rather be me
Than be with you ♪
1659
01:26:39,629 --> 01:26:41,196
Walk away, turd.
1660
01:26:41,370 --> 01:26:43,981
Regina, I'’m so sorry!
I didn'’t mean to hurt you!
1661
01:26:44,155 --> 01:26:46,505
You are
a lowlife version of me...
1662
01:26:46,679 --> 01:26:49,987
♪ I'’d rather be me
I'’d rather be me ♪
1663
01:26:50,161 --> 01:26:55,297
♪ I'’d rather be me
Than be with ♪
1664
01:26:55,471 --> 01:26:58,865
♪ You! ♪
1665
01:27:07,178 --> 01:27:09,876
And that'’s how
Regina George died.
1666
01:27:10,050 --> 01:27:13,663
Again, no one died!
1667
01:27:13,837 --> 01:27:16,361
I mean, technically, Regina
did die for, like, 15 seconds
1668
01:27:16,535 --> 01:27:18,320
but then she was revived.
1669
01:27:18,494 --> 01:27:21,540
And of course,
the rumor mill
started going insane.
1670
01:27:21,714 --> 01:27:24,064
I just saw
Regina get hit by a bus.
1671
01:27:24,239 --> 01:27:26,415
An artery come out
of her neck and her head
went all the way around!
1672
01:27:26,589 --> 01:27:27,938
Guys, street safety
is so important.
1673
01:27:28,112 --> 01:27:29,809
I'’m just sad, like,
that'’s all I can say.
1674
01:27:33,987 --> 01:27:35,641
We are sending
our love and prayers...
1675
01:27:35,815 --> 01:27:38,078
Link in bio to my GoFundMe
page to raise money.
1676
01:27:38,253 --> 01:27:39,297
Regina, we knew
you would pull through.
1677
01:27:39,471 --> 01:27:40,907
How do I get this
off my algorithm?
1678
01:27:41,081 --> 01:27:42,822
I'’m not one
to spread rumors,
1679
01:27:42,996 --> 01:27:44,955
but I'’m pretty sure I saw Cady
push her right in front of it.
1680
01:27:45,129 --> 01:27:46,913
On my life, Cady pushed her.
1681
01:27:47,087 --> 01:27:49,438
I literally saw Cady
push Regina.
1682
01:27:49,612 --> 01:27:51,353
Don'’t fill up my comments,
but... karma.
1683
01:27:51,527 --> 01:27:54,443
Girls are made deranged
by what'’s called hormones.
1684
01:27:54,617 --> 01:27:55,792
Hormones.
1685
01:27:55,966 --> 01:28:00,275
W-H-O-R...
1686
01:28:06,281 --> 01:28:08,413
F that bitch. F that wench.
1687
01:28:15,899 --> 01:28:17,335
All right.
1688
01:28:17,509 --> 01:28:21,339
Ms. Norbury is on a, uh,
temporary leave of absence.
1689
01:28:21,513 --> 01:28:23,036
- Jail.
- Hey.
1690
01:28:23,210 --> 01:28:25,735
I heard that, Miss Rockwell.
1691
01:28:25,909 --> 01:28:28,390
Anyways, we'’re not sure
who your substitute...
1692
01:28:28,564 --> 01:28:30,305
I did it.
1693
01:28:32,742 --> 01:28:35,658
I wrote that Ms. Norbury is
a drug pusher, and it'’s a lie.
1694
01:28:46,233 --> 01:28:49,062
Three-week suspension.
1695
01:28:49,236 --> 01:28:52,370
This is not
who I know you to be.
1696
01:28:52,544 --> 01:28:53,458
I know.
1697
01:28:57,767 --> 01:28:59,159
Where is my Ndebele vase?
1698
01:28:59,334 --> 01:29:02,206
What?
What do you mean, what?
1699
01:29:02,380 --> 01:29:04,948
You know, the colorful vase
that'’s always in that window.
1700
01:29:05,122 --> 01:29:06,428
Where is it?
1701
01:29:10,997 --> 01:29:13,696
I had some friends over
when you were away.
1702
01:29:13,870 --> 01:29:15,001
Go.
1703
01:29:15,175 --> 01:29:16,655
Go do your homework!
1704
01:29:16,829 --> 01:29:18,744
Um, also...
1705
01:29:20,355 --> 01:29:22,531
I need you to sign
my Calculus test,
1706
01:29:22,705 --> 01:29:23,880
'’cause I'’m failing.
1707
01:29:54,824 --> 01:29:56,565
Hey.
1708
01:29:56,739 --> 01:29:59,568
I guess you'’ll need this back
to set an alarm for tomorrow.
1709
01:30:00,395 --> 01:30:01,961
Don'’t want it.
1710
01:30:02,135 --> 01:30:04,224
You only have one message.
1711
01:30:04,399 --> 01:30:06,879
From someone named Karen,
who says:
1712
01:30:07,053 --> 01:30:10,143
"Donut worry.
I am still your freend."
1713
01:30:14,539 --> 01:30:16,628
How bad is it gonna
be tomorrow?
1714
01:30:16,802 --> 01:30:18,369
I was thinking maybe
I should go back
1715
01:30:18,543 --> 01:30:20,066
to being homeschooled.
1716
01:30:20,240 --> 01:30:21,198
Sweetie, no.
1717
01:30:21,372 --> 01:30:22,895
It'’s too small, me and you.
1718
01:30:23,069 --> 01:30:24,854
And I think
you'’re learning things now
1719
01:30:25,028 --> 01:30:26,812
that I don'’t know
how to teach.
1720
01:30:33,079 --> 01:30:34,472
Good night.
1721
01:30:35,560 --> 01:30:37,301
- Mom?
- Hmm?
1722
01:30:39,085 --> 01:30:43,133
Can you sit with me
till I fall asleep?
1723
01:30:43,960 --> 01:30:44,917
Mm-hmm.
1724
01:30:56,363 --> 01:30:58,453
Oh, sweetie.
1725
01:31:18,821 --> 01:31:21,214
Oh, hi. Did you want
to buy some drugs?
1726
01:31:21,388 --> 01:31:24,000
No, I was just handing
my quiz back.
1727
01:31:24,174 --> 01:31:26,785
You know, when the police
tore apart my house
1728
01:31:26,959 --> 01:31:28,526
looking for imaginary heroin,
1729
01:31:28,700 --> 01:31:31,398
I found this old calculator
that I thought I lost, so...
1730
01:31:31,573 --> 01:31:33,052
totally worth it.
1731
01:31:33,966 --> 01:31:35,098
I'’m really sorry.
1732
01:31:35,272 --> 01:31:36,882
Thank you.
1733
01:31:37,056 --> 01:31:38,710
But I know you didn'’t write
that whole book yourself.
1734
01:31:38,884 --> 01:31:40,233
You gonna tell Mr. Duvall
who did?
1735
01:31:41,539 --> 01:31:42,801
No.
1736
01:31:42,975 --> 01:31:44,890
Trying this new thing
where I don'’t talk
1737
01:31:45,064 --> 01:31:46,457
about people
behind their backs.
1738
01:31:46,631 --> 01:31:49,721
Getting hit by a bus seems
like enough punishment.
1739
01:31:51,114 --> 01:31:53,420
- 100.
- Welcome back, nerd.
1740
01:31:55,422 --> 01:31:57,686
Will you be attending
the Spring Fling this weekend?
1741
01:31:57,860 --> 01:32:00,036
No. Everyone hates me.
1742
01:32:00,210 --> 01:32:02,255
Perfect, because
I figured out a way for you
1743
01:32:02,429 --> 01:32:03,605
to earn some extra credit.
1744
01:32:03,779 --> 01:32:05,432
Hey, Bird,
you ready to suit up
1745
01:32:05,607 --> 01:32:07,522
and show off
your math schquills?
1746
01:32:07,696 --> 01:32:09,524
Kev, stop trying
to make "schquills" happen.
It'’s not gonna happen.
1747
01:32:09,698 --> 01:32:12,657
- Jacob, get off my dick.
- Hey! PG-13, please.
1748
01:32:30,501 --> 01:32:32,938
Welcome to the ICMT
State Math Championships.
1749
01:32:33,112 --> 01:32:34,810
Sponsored by SeatGeek.
1750
01:32:34,984 --> 01:32:36,507
Yeah, SeatGeek!
1751
01:32:36,681 --> 01:32:38,117
Tonight will be
the culmination
1752
01:32:38,291 --> 01:32:41,033
of all you'’ve worked for.
1753
01:32:41,207 --> 01:32:43,122
Each right answer
will be worth two points.
1754
01:32:43,296 --> 01:32:46,822
The highest score at the end
of 40 minutes of play wins.
1755
01:32:46,996 --> 01:32:49,781
As always, no calculators.
1756
01:32:51,130 --> 01:32:53,916
- Question one.
- Two, three, four!
1757
01:32:59,182 --> 01:33:01,967
Determine the equation of
the tangent line to the graph.
1758
01:33:03,403 --> 01:33:05,449
The answer is B. Correct.
1759
01:33:05,623 --> 01:33:08,452
Solve the equation above
using prime numbers.
1760
01:33:08,626 --> 01:33:10,541
Prime factor 41.
1761
01:33:10,715 --> 01:33:12,108
Correct.
1762
01:33:12,282 --> 01:33:13,849
Please solve for x.
1763
01:33:14,023 --> 01:33:16,155
x = 2? Incorrect.
1764
01:33:16,329 --> 01:33:17,853
x is greater
than the value of y.
1765
01:33:18,027 --> 01:33:19,681
Correct.
1766
01:33:21,291 --> 01:33:23,423
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1767
01:33:23,598 --> 01:33:26,165
♪ I didn'’t get it ♪
1768
01:33:26,339 --> 01:33:30,474
♪ I didn'’t get it, somehow ♪
1769
01:33:30,648 --> 01:33:34,434
♪ Smart with math
But stupid with love ♪
1770
01:33:34,609 --> 01:33:36,523
♪ I didn'’t get it ♪
1771
01:33:36,698 --> 01:33:37,742
Negative two!
1772
01:33:37,916 --> 01:33:38,830
Correct.
1773
01:33:39,004 --> 01:33:40,658
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1774
01:33:42,660 --> 01:33:44,749
♪ Whoa-oa-oa
Stupid with love♪
1775
01:33:44,923 --> 01:33:47,447
- Function = mx + c.
- Correct.
1776
01:33:47,622 --> 01:33:49,493
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1777
01:33:51,364 --> 01:33:52,801
♪ Whoa-oa-oa
Stupid with love ♪
1778
01:33:52,975 --> 01:33:54,411
Both polynomials
are second degree,
1779
01:33:54,585 --> 01:33:55,978
so the asymptote is at y = 5.
1780
01:33:56,152 --> 01:33:57,719
Excellent.
1781
01:33:57,893 --> 01:33:59,329
♪ I feel my brain
Begin to rust ♪
1782
01:33:59,503 --> 01:34:01,505
♪ I am filled with calcu-lust ♪
1783
01:34:01,679 --> 01:34:03,463
♪ Does this guy work out?
He must ♪
1784
01:34:03,638 --> 01:34:05,727
♪ All sweaty at the gym ♪
1785
01:34:05,901 --> 01:34:10,035
♪ Could that image be more hot?
Let me just enjoy
That thought ♪
1786
01:34:10,209 --> 01:34:11,254
♪ School was rough ♪
1787
01:34:11,428 --> 01:34:12,385
♪ But now it'’s not ♪
1788
01:34:12,559 --> 01:34:13,386
Negative four?
1789
01:34:13,560 --> 01:34:14,779
True.
1790
01:34:14,953 --> 01:34:15,998
29?
1791
01:34:16,172 --> 01:34:17,173
The slope is zero.
1792
01:34:17,347 --> 01:34:18,522
Incorrect.
1793
01:34:18,696 --> 01:34:20,002
The slope
of the tangent line is four.
1794
01:34:20,176 --> 01:34:22,874
Excellent.
1795
01:34:23,048 --> 01:34:25,529
Well, this has only ever
happened once before.
1796
01:34:25,703 --> 01:34:28,663
Ladies and gentlemen,
we have a tie.
1797
01:34:31,013 --> 01:34:32,318
In the event of a tie,
1798
01:34:32,492 --> 01:34:34,930
we move into a one-on-one
sudden-death round
1799
01:34:35,104 --> 01:34:37,106
where each team
may choose their opponent.
1800
01:34:43,678 --> 01:34:45,157
We pick the girl.
1801
01:34:46,942 --> 01:34:48,595
We pick the girl, too.
1802
01:34:51,468 --> 01:34:53,775
Ms. Krafft, Ms. Heron,
please step forward.
1803
01:35:10,530 --> 01:35:13,403
- Nice to meet you.
- Whatever, slut.
1804
01:35:13,577 --> 01:35:16,972
Contestants, please find
the limit of this expression.
1805
01:35:21,759 --> 01:35:23,674
You know,
it'’s not me against you.
1806
01:35:23,848 --> 01:35:26,982
It'’s North Shore
versus Marymount.
1807
01:35:28,157 --> 01:35:29,985
A very wise teacher...
1808
01:35:30,159 --> 01:35:31,595
The limit is negative one.
1809
01:35:33,118 --> 01:35:34,772
That answer is incorrect.
1810
01:35:37,383 --> 01:35:40,082
If Ms. Heron
can answer correctly,
we have a winner.
1811
01:35:40,256 --> 01:35:42,954
You got this, Golf Bird.
1812
01:35:43,128 --> 01:35:45,914
Why can'’t I remember
anything about limits?
1813
01:35:46,088 --> 01:35:48,003
Honey, I don'’t know your life.
1814
01:35:49,744 --> 01:35:51,746
Why did you waste time
insulting me?
1815
01:35:51,920 --> 01:35:53,617
Why did I waste time
judging your hair?
1816
01:35:53,791 --> 01:35:55,445
This is not a competition.
1817
01:35:56,359 --> 01:35:58,056
It kind of is, though.
1818
01:35:58,230 --> 01:35:59,754
Right.
1819
01:36:00,624 --> 01:36:01,930
A math one.
1820
01:36:03,453 --> 01:36:05,237
♪ I was stupid ♪
1821
01:36:06,499 --> 01:36:08,197
♪ But now I get it ♪
1822
01:36:08,371 --> 01:36:12,244
♪ No what ifs, might haves
Could have been if I had ♪
1823
01:36:12,418 --> 01:36:14,638
♪ Only tried, not held back ♪
1824
01:36:14,812 --> 01:36:16,988
♪ That'’s not a part of my plan ♪
1825
01:36:17,162 --> 01:36:19,077
♪ I see the things
That I missed ♪
1826
01:36:19,251 --> 01:36:21,471
♪ No, that'’s not the me
That I am ♪
1827
01:36:21,645 --> 01:36:24,474
♪ The limit
It doesn'’t exist!♪
1828
01:36:25,562 --> 01:36:27,129
The limit does not exist.
1829
01:36:27,303 --> 01:36:30,132
Our new state champions,
the North Shore Mathletes.
1830
01:36:34,484 --> 01:36:35,790
Yeah, you like that,
Marymount?
1831
01:36:35,964 --> 01:36:38,227
Get some! Get some!
1832
01:36:38,401 --> 01:36:39,924
Don'’t hold me back!
Don'’t hold me back!
1833
01:36:40,098 --> 01:36:41,883
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1834
01:36:42,753 --> 01:36:44,407
♪ But now I get it ♪
1835
01:36:44,581 --> 01:36:46,713
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1836
01:36:46,888 --> 01:36:48,890
♪ But now I get it ♪
1837
01:36:49,064 --> 01:36:50,979
♪ Stupid with love ♪
1838
01:36:51,153 --> 01:36:54,112
♪ But now I get it
Stupid!♪
1839
01:36:54,721 --> 01:36:55,853
Have you seen Jason?
1840
01:36:56,027 --> 01:36:57,899
Like right now
or like ever in life?
1841
01:36:58,073 --> 01:36:59,509
Ohhh, miss!
1842
01:36:59,683 --> 01:37:01,946
I'’m supposed to hang
with my fallback in there
1843
01:37:02,120 --> 01:37:03,426
but, you know,
if you wanted to slip out,
1844
01:37:03,600 --> 01:37:05,558
meet in my Jeep or... Jason!
1845
01:37:05,732 --> 01:37:07,038
It'’s me!
1846
01:37:07,212 --> 01:37:08,561
"Fallback"?
1847
01:37:08,735 --> 01:37:10,781
No, I... I know.
Yeah, I knew the whole time.
1848
01:37:10,955 --> 01:37:12,914
No, we are done!
1849
01:37:13,088 --> 01:37:14,132
Because you know what?
1850
01:37:14,306 --> 01:37:18,136
I have a 140 IQ,
very toned legs,
1851
01:37:18,310 --> 01:37:20,225
and my parents love me!
1852
01:37:20,399 --> 01:37:22,314
And you will regret this
when you'’re old
1853
01:37:22,488 --> 01:37:24,839
because I am fricking fetch!
1854
01:37:25,013 --> 01:37:27,624
- That'’s how you use it.
- Come on.
1855
01:37:29,756 --> 01:37:31,584
Okay, attention, everybody.
1856
01:37:32,629 --> 01:37:35,501
Whoo-hoo-hoo,
let'’s go!
1857
01:37:42,857 --> 01:37:43,858
Regina!
1858
01:37:46,904 --> 01:37:48,427
You look pretty.
1859
01:37:50,865 --> 01:37:52,954
I'’m wearing
a corrective neck collar.
1860
01:37:59,569 --> 01:38:02,746
I'’m sorry about the bus.
I feel like it'’s all my fault.
1861
01:38:02,920 --> 01:38:05,183
No... No, it'’s not your fault.
1862
01:38:05,357 --> 01:38:07,882
Cady, don'’t apologize for
things that aren'’t your fault.
1863
01:38:08,056 --> 01:38:10,493
But, yeah,
I forgive you, '’cause...
1864
01:38:12,408 --> 01:38:14,105
I'’m on a lot
of pain medication right now.
1865
01:38:14,279 --> 01:38:16,847
You know I died
for 15 seconds?
1866
01:38:17,021 --> 01:38:18,022
Yeah.
1867
01:38:19,719 --> 01:38:23,549
Anyway, my mom was really
pumped to be on the news.
1868
01:38:25,073 --> 01:38:26,335
It'’s weird
when people treat you
1869
01:38:26,509 --> 01:38:27,640
like you'’re famous
or something.
1870
01:38:27,814 --> 01:38:29,991
It'’s amazing.
1871
01:38:30,165 --> 01:38:31,470
Until it'’s not.
1872
01:38:33,342 --> 01:38:37,172
Look, I...
I know I have to change.
1873
01:38:38,347 --> 01:38:40,392
And I was harsh.
1874
01:38:40,566 --> 01:38:42,177
And people say
that I'’m a bitch.
1875
01:38:42,351 --> 01:38:44,744
You know what they would
call me if I was a boy?
1876
01:38:44,919 --> 01:38:47,747
Strong."Reginald."
1877
01:38:47,922 --> 01:38:51,664
That'’s what my mom was gonna
name me if I was a boy, so...
1878
01:38:51,838 --> 01:38:54,798
Honestly,
I would rather be "bitch."
1879
01:39:00,673 --> 01:39:02,762
I like you.
1880
01:39:02,937 --> 01:39:05,635
But this medicine
makes me like everyone, so...
1881
01:39:05,809 --> 01:39:07,942
Okay,
do we have all of our nominees
1882
01:39:08,116 --> 01:39:10,596
for the Spring Fling
King and Queen onstage?
1883
01:39:10,770 --> 01:39:12,947
I just want to say
you'’re all winners.
1884
01:39:13,121 --> 01:39:18,126
And I am retiring as soon
as this evening is over.
1885
01:39:19,649 --> 01:39:22,217
The winner
of the Spring Fling King is...
1886
01:39:22,391 --> 01:39:24,045
Shane Oman.
1887
01:39:26,221 --> 01:39:27,831
Whoo! Yeah!
1888
01:39:31,226 --> 01:39:32,227
Hey.
1889
01:39:33,837 --> 01:39:35,708
Um, have you seen Janis?
1890
01:39:35,882 --> 01:39:38,015
Every day since 2009.
1891
01:39:38,189 --> 01:39:39,495
But she doesn'’t want
to see you.
1892
01:39:39,669 --> 01:39:42,106
And
your Spring Fling Queen...
1893
01:39:42,280 --> 01:39:44,935
Damian, I'’m...
I'’m really sorry.
1894
01:39:45,109 --> 01:39:47,242
Cady Heron.
1895
01:39:47,416 --> 01:39:49,984
- What?
- I mean, of course she is.
1896
01:39:52,508 --> 01:39:54,031
Go, Cady!
1897
01:39:55,641 --> 01:39:56,903
Where is Cady?
1898
01:40:11,483 --> 01:40:12,702
Congratulations.
1899
01:40:16,706 --> 01:40:17,750
Um...
1900
01:40:18,969 --> 01:40:20,840
I think people voted for me
1901
01:40:21,015 --> 01:40:22,320
because they think
I pushed someone
1902
01:40:22,494 --> 01:40:23,713
in front of a bus.
1903
01:40:23,887 --> 01:40:27,021
It'’s not your fault.
A bus pushed me.
1904
01:40:30,894 --> 01:40:34,028
But what is my fault is
1905
01:40:34,202 --> 01:40:35,725
the way I treated my friends.
1906
01:40:37,596 --> 01:40:40,556
I used you and I lied to you
and I'’m... I'’m so sorry.
1907
01:40:44,081 --> 01:40:46,605
I'’m also sorry to everyone
1908
01:40:46,779 --> 01:40:48,694
whose feelings got hurt
from the Burn Book.
1909
01:40:48,868 --> 01:40:50,261
You know,
it'’s really not required
1910
01:40:50,435 --> 01:40:51,915
for you to make a speech.
1911
01:40:52,089 --> 01:40:54,135
Right. Almost done,
I promise. Um...
1912
01:40:55,353 --> 01:40:59,140
I think everyone looks
like royalty tonight.
1913
01:40:59,314 --> 01:41:04,797
It just seems weird
for one person to win this.
1914
01:41:07,452 --> 01:41:10,064
I mean,
it'’s just a chunk of plastic.
1915
01:41:12,370 --> 01:41:14,851
We could just share it.
1916
01:41:18,985 --> 01:41:23,164
♪ Cheap, fake
Easy to break ♪
1917
01:41:23,338 --> 01:41:25,949
♪ That'’s how I used to be ♪
1918
01:41:26,123 --> 01:41:28,778
Here... Take it.
1919
01:41:28,952 --> 01:41:31,172
♪ Now I'’m awake ♪
1920
01:41:31,346 --> 01:41:33,826
♪ I'’ll tell you what I see ♪
1921
01:41:34,000 --> 01:41:36,829
♪ Plastic don'’t shine
Glitter don'’t shine ♪
1922
01:41:37,003 --> 01:41:41,007
♪ Rhinestones don'’t shine
The way you do ♪
1923
01:41:41,182 --> 01:41:44,402
♪ You are so real
You are so rare ♪
1924
01:41:44,576 --> 01:41:46,970
♪ I see you there ♪
1925
01:41:47,144 --> 01:41:50,713
♪ I see you ♪
1926
01:41:50,887 --> 01:41:53,019
♪ I see stars ♪
1927
01:41:53,194 --> 01:41:56,371
♪ So many stars tonight ♪
1928
01:41:56,545 --> 01:42:00,592
♪ You could make diamonds dull ♪
1929
01:42:00,766 --> 01:42:04,248
♪ You are so beautiful ♪
1930
01:42:04,422 --> 01:42:07,164
♪ I see stars ♪
1931
01:42:07,338 --> 01:42:10,776
♪ You shine as bright as day ♪
1932
01:42:10,950 --> 01:42:13,953
♪ I will look out for you ♪
1933
01:42:14,128 --> 01:42:17,740
♪ We'’ll light each other'’s way ♪
1934
01:42:17,914 --> 01:42:22,005
♪ You'’re all stars ♪
1935
01:42:23,876 --> 01:42:25,443
All right,
have a good time, everyone.
1936
01:42:25,617 --> 01:42:26,488
No vaping.
1937
01:42:26,662 --> 01:42:27,750
Rachel Hamilton!
1938
01:42:27,924 --> 01:42:28,925
Give me that inhaler.
1939
01:42:43,722 --> 01:42:45,463
Are you still mad at me?
1940
01:42:45,637 --> 01:42:47,987
I don'’t know.
Are you still an asshole?
1941
01:42:48,901 --> 01:42:50,251
I don'’t think so?
1942
01:42:56,648 --> 01:42:58,041
Cute.
1943
01:42:59,738 --> 01:43:02,176
♪ Wherever darkness falls ♪
1944
01:43:02,350 --> 01:43:07,398
♪ I'’ll be the light ♪
1945
01:43:07,572 --> 01:43:10,967
♪ To guide you home ♪
1946
01:43:11,141 --> 01:43:13,230
She sounds good.
1947
01:43:14,275 --> 01:43:16,581
But she does not
go here, y'’all.
1948
01:43:16,755 --> 01:43:19,541
Would you look over there?
Oh, my gosh!
1949
01:43:21,934 --> 01:43:24,067
- Do you want to dance?
- Yeah.
1950
01:43:29,203 --> 01:43:31,857
Congrats on winning state.
The jacket looks, uh,
really good on you.
1951
01:43:32,031 --> 01:43:35,513
Thanks. It has a pocket inside
for a calculator.
1952
01:43:35,687 --> 01:43:36,775
- What?
- Yeah.
1953
01:43:36,949 --> 01:43:37,950
Grool.
1954
01:43:39,517 --> 01:43:40,823
Grool.
1955
01:43:43,521 --> 01:43:46,655
♪ You stars ♪
1956
01:43:46,829 --> 01:43:50,224
♪ So many stars tonight ♪
1957
01:43:50,398 --> 01:43:53,139
♪ I see stars ♪
1958
01:43:53,314 --> 01:43:54,793
And that was
the first time in history
1959
01:43:54,967 --> 01:43:57,318
that Spring Fling
was actually fun.
1960
01:43:57,492 --> 01:44:01,974
Ms. Norbury and
Mr. Duvall got wasted. JK, JK.
1961
01:44:02,148 --> 01:44:04,716
Karen discovered
the safe joy
1962
01:44:04,890 --> 01:44:07,850
of dancing with theater boys.
1963
01:44:08,024 --> 01:44:11,680
And Plastics and Jocks
partied with math nerds.
1964
01:44:11,854 --> 01:44:13,247
Janis danced
to a pop song
1965
01:44:13,421 --> 01:44:15,074
and didn'’t burst into flames.
1966
01:44:15,945 --> 01:44:17,773
Ow. Ow. Ow!
1967
01:44:17,947 --> 01:44:20,863
And everyone else
just kind of floated.
1968
01:44:23,387 --> 01:44:25,607
So the moral
of our story is thus:
1969
01:44:25,781 --> 01:44:27,957
Calling someone stupid
won'’t make you any smarter.
1970
01:44:28,131 --> 01:44:30,002
And even the people
you really don'’t like
1971
01:44:30,176 --> 01:44:32,483
are still people
who just want to coexist.
1972
01:44:32,657 --> 01:44:35,094
So get off their dicks!
1973
01:44:38,315 --> 01:44:40,099
♪ I see ♪
1974
01:44:40,274 --> 01:44:43,929
♪ Stars! ♪
1975
01:44:48,412 --> 01:44:49,935
♪ Where she at?
What she doing?♪
1976
01:44:50,109 --> 01:44:51,937
♪ Who she with
And where she from?♪
1977
01:44:52,111 --> 01:44:53,852
♪ Well, she'’s this
Oh, she'’s that ♪
1978
01:44:54,026 --> 01:44:56,159
♪ She'’s a flight risk
On the run ♪
1979
01:44:56,333 --> 01:44:57,943
♪ She'’s back, she'’s back ♪
1980
01:44:58,117 --> 01:44:59,815
♪ Yeah, I'’m back, bitch
Are you done?♪
1981
01:44:59,989 --> 01:45:03,775
♪ Excuse me
While I bite my tongue ♪
1982
01:45:03,949 --> 01:45:07,823
♪ I'’m back on that same shit
From before ♪
1983
01:45:07,997 --> 01:45:11,479
♪ I can'’t take this pettiness
Now I'’m bored ♪
1984
01:45:11,653 --> 01:45:15,744
♪ We can champagne
There'’s enough for us all ♪
1985
01:45:15,918 --> 01:45:18,747
♪ Told you who I am
And what it is
It'’s not my fault ♪
1986
01:45:18,921 --> 01:45:22,794
♪ It'’s not my fault
You came with her
But she might leave with me ♪
1987
01:45:22,968 --> 01:45:26,363
♪ It'’s not my fault
You'’ve got to pay
For what I get for free ♪
1988
01:45:26,537 --> 01:45:28,626
♪ It'’s not my fault ♪
1989
01:45:28,800 --> 01:45:30,585
♪ You'’re like, you'’re like
You'’re like in love with me ♪
1990
01:45:30,759 --> 01:45:32,543
♪ It'’s not my fault
You'’re like in love with me ♪
1991
01:45:32,717 --> 01:45:34,937
♪ You'’re like in love with me ♪
1992
01:45:35,111 --> 01:45:38,506
♪ Get her number, get her name
Get a good thing
While you can ♪
1993
01:45:38,680 --> 01:45:42,814
♪ Kiss a blonde, kiss a friend
Can a gay girl get an amen?♪
1994
01:45:42,988 --> 01:45:46,209
♪ I'’m back on that same shit
From before ♪
1995
01:45:46,383 --> 01:45:50,082
♪ I can'’t take this pettiness
Now I'’m bored ♪
1996
01:45:50,256 --> 01:45:54,173
♪ We can champagne
There'’s enough for us all ♪
1997
01:45:54,348 --> 01:45:56,393
♪ I told you who I am
And what it is ♪
1998
01:45:56,567 --> 01:45:58,961
♪ It'’s not my fault
It'’s not my fault ♪
1999
01:45:59,135 --> 01:46:01,224
♪ You came with her
But she might leave with me ♪
2000
01:46:01,398 --> 01:46:03,095
♪ It'’s not my fault ♪
2001
01:46:03,269 --> 01:46:05,924
♪ You'’ve got to pay
For what I get for free ♪
2002
01:46:06,098 --> 01:46:09,232
♪ It'’s not my fault
You'’re like, you'’re like
You'’re like in love with me ♪
2003
01:46:09,406 --> 01:46:11,713
♪ It'’s not my fault
You'’re like in love with me ♪
2004
01:46:11,887 --> 01:46:13,758
♪ You'’re like in love with me ♪
2005
01:46:13,932 --> 01:46:15,630
♪ I mean, who wouldn'’t want
To be in love with me ♪
2006
01:46:15,804 --> 01:46:17,632
♪ I'’m a mood board
Girls got to Pinterest me ♪
2007
01:46:17,806 --> 01:46:19,677
♪ I'’m a stallion but they come
And f... me like Trojan ♪
2008
01:46:19,851 --> 01:46:21,984
♪ And it wouldn'’t be me
If I ain'’t cause commotion ♪
2009
01:46:22,158 --> 01:46:24,595
♪ I'’m so bad
Dudes thought I was AI
I ballin'’ like AI ♪
2010
01:46:24,769 --> 01:46:27,076
♪ I stick to a whole lot
Of paper like a stapler
Stack like Jenga ♪
2011
01:46:27,250 --> 01:46:29,034
♪ And you basic bitch
Get stroke like a painter ♪
2012
01:46:29,208 --> 01:46:31,167
♪ It'’s funny how the mean girl
Open all the doors ♪
2013
01:46:31,341 --> 01:46:33,038
♪ I'’ve been told y'’all
I'’m the black Regina George ♪
2014
01:46:33,212 --> 01:46:34,997
♪ Bikini top, booty shorts
Megan core ♪
2015
01:46:35,171 --> 01:46:36,781
♪ You was hating back then
Now you finna hate more ♪
2016
01:46:36,955 --> 01:46:38,740
♪ I got influence
They do anything I endorse ♪
2017
01:46:38,914 --> 01:46:41,003
♪ I run s...
To be a bad bitch is a sport ♪
2018
01:46:41,177 --> 01:46:43,701
♪ I woke up hotter
Than I was yesterday ♪
2019
01:46:43,875 --> 01:46:47,749
♪ Don'’t care about no rules
'’Cause I always get my way ♪
2020
01:46:47,923 --> 01:46:49,620
♪ It'’s not my fault ♪
2021
01:46:49,794 --> 01:46:52,144
♪ You came with her
But she might leave with me ♪
2022
01:46:52,318 --> 01:46:55,713
♪ It'’s not my fault
You'’ve got to pay
For what I get for free ♪
2023
01:46:55,887 --> 01:46:59,238
♪ It'’s not my fault
You'’re like, you'’re like
You'’re like in love with me ♪
2024
01:46:59,413 --> 01:47:02,285
♪ It'’s not my fault
You'’re like in love with me ♪
2025
01:47:02,459 --> 01:47:03,721
♪ You'’re like in love with me ♪
2026
01:47:06,507 --> 01:47:08,552
♪ A sexy Quint
From sexy Jaws ♪
2027
01:47:08,726 --> 01:47:10,424
♪ Catching sexy sharks ♪
2028
01:47:10,598 --> 01:47:13,862
♪ Sexy Eleanor Roosevelt
Or sexy Joan of Arc ♪
2029
01:47:14,036 --> 01:47:17,735
♪ I can be a sexy pirate
Or a sexy ballet dancer ♪
2030
01:47:17,909 --> 01:47:22,174
♪ I can be a sexy doctor
And cure some sexy cancer!♪
2031
01:47:34,273 --> 01:47:36,014
♪ Happy Halloween! ♪
2032
01:47:39,888 --> 01:47:43,239
♪ This is
Modern feminism talkin'’♪
2033
01:47:43,413 --> 01:47:46,808
♪ Watch me as I run the world
In shoes I cannot walk in ♪
2034
01:47:46,982 --> 01:47:50,246
♪ I can be who I want to be ♪
2035
01:47:50,420 --> 01:47:53,815
♪ And sex... sex ♪
2036
01:47:53,989 --> 01:47:58,646
♪ Sexy! ♪
2037
01:47:58,820 --> 01:48:00,996
I'’m a sexy mouse. Duh!
2038
01:52:00,452 --> 01:52:01,845
You'’re next.
2039
01:52:02,019 --> 01:52:04,369
You could be really hot
if you change, like,
2040
01:52:04,543 --> 01:52:05,806
everything.
156803
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