All language subtitles for Mean Girls 2024 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP5 1 Atmos H 264-FLUX_track4_[eng]

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:23,010 --> 00:00:24,967 [person 1] Make sure I'm in the frame. 2 00:00:25,002 --> 00:00:26,936 Make sure you get my head. I want to see my hair. 3 00:00:26,971 --> 00:00:28,839 [person 2] All right, all right. [person 1] Janis, hurry up! 4 00:00:28,874 --> 00:00:30,313 [Janis] It's not easy making a movie. 5 00:00:30,348 --> 00:00:31,545 [person 1] You better not drop my phone. 6 00:00:32,350 --> 00:00:33,646 You got it? 7 00:00:33,681 --> 00:00:35,615 Yep. Yep. Yep. Okay, here we go. 8 00:00:35,650 --> 00:00:37,353 Hey... Oh, Lord. [Janis] Shit. 9 00:00:37,388 --> 00:00:39,487 [person 1] We're Cloverfielding. Pick it up. 10 00:00:39,522 --> 00:00:41,654 [Janis] Give me a minute. [person 1] Make sure I'm in the frame, girl. 11 00:00:41,689 --> 00:00:44,690 Give me a minute! Am I in the frame? 12 00:00:44,725 --> 00:00:46,021 I'm in there? [Janis] Yes. 13 00:00:46,056 --> 00:00:47,363 Get me in the frame? Yeah. 14 00:00:47,398 --> 00:00:48,562 You got my head in there? Yeah. 15 00:00:48,597 --> 00:00:50,894 Boom, let's go. 16 00:00:50,929 --> 00:00:53,303 ♪ It's a cautionary tale ♪ 17 00:00:53,338 --> 00:00:55,239 ♪ Of fear and lust and pride ♪ 18 00:00:55,274 --> 00:00:59,507 ♪ Based on actual events Where people died ♪ 19 00:00:59,542 --> 00:01:00,904 No one died. 20 00:01:00,939 --> 00:01:02,114 ♪ But how far Would you go ♪ 21 00:01:02,149 --> 00:01:04,644 ♪ To be popular and hot? ♪ 22 00:01:04,679 --> 00:01:07,284 ♪ Would you resist temptation? ♪ 23 00:01:07,319 --> 00:01:08,747 ♪ No, you would not! ♪ 24 00:01:08,782 --> 00:01:10,716 ♪ Just admit it sometimes ♪ 25 00:01:10,751 --> 00:01:15,688 ♪ Mean is what you are Mean is easier than nice ♪ 26 00:01:15,723 --> 00:01:18,691 ♪ And though mean Can take you far ♪ 27 00:01:18,726 --> 00:01:22,024 ♪ Maybe this will Make you think twice ♪ 28 00:01:22,059 --> 00:01:24,026 Spin. Clicker. Fosse! 29 00:01:24,061 --> 00:01:27,502 ♪ This is a cautionary tale ♪ 30 00:01:28,670 --> 00:01:31,033 ♪ About corruption And betrayal ♪ 31 00:01:31,068 --> 00:01:33,541 ♪ And getting hit by a bus! ♪ 32 00:01:33,576 --> 00:01:36,742 ♪ You can't buy integrity ♪ [vocalizing] 33 00:01:36,777 --> 00:01:41,780 ♪ At the mall It's not for sale ♪ 34 00:01:41,815 --> 00:01:42,946 Truth. 35 00:01:42,981 --> 00:01:46,653 ♪ This is a cautionary ♪ 36 00:01:46,688 --> 00:01:52,824 ♪ Tale! ♪ 37 00:02:03,573 --> 00:02:05,606 [birds chirping] 38 00:02:10,041 --> 00:02:11,711 [person] ♪ I used To think I would spend ♪ 39 00:02:11,746 --> 00:02:14,450 ♪ Every second I have ♪ 40 00:02:15,420 --> 00:02:17,849 ♪ Right where my story began ♪ 41 00:02:20,117 --> 00:02:21,820 ♪ I'd be happy here ♪ 42 00:02:21,855 --> 00:02:24,658 ♪ Every day, month Year of my life ♪ 43 00:02:24,693 --> 00:02:28,761 ♪ But now I'm wishing For whatever comes After goodbye ♪ 44 00:02:29,764 --> 00:02:32,534 ♪ On every star in the sky ♪ 45 00:02:34,703 --> 00:02:39,035 ♪ And I'm dreaming of What I could become ♪ 46 00:02:39,070 --> 00:02:42,313 ♪ This is where home will be ♪ 47 00:02:42,348 --> 00:02:45,910 ♪ As long as my lungs Can breathe ♪ 48 00:02:45,945 --> 00:02:49,683 ♪ But my heart is dyin' To leave ♪ 49 00:02:49,718 --> 00:02:52,389 ♪ 'Cause I know there's more To me ♪ 50 00:02:52,424 --> 00:02:54,688 ♪ I don't want to live with What ifs... ♪ 51 00:02:54,723 --> 00:02:56,151 [Mom] Cady? 52 00:02:56,186 --> 00:02:58,087 I've been thinking about what you said. 53 00:02:58,122 --> 00:03:00,958 About being frustrated by my decision 54 00:03:00,993 --> 00:03:02,597 and feeling a little stuck here, 55 00:03:02,632 --> 00:03:03,829 just me and you. 56 00:03:03,864 --> 00:03:05,193 I'm sorry I yelled. 57 00:03:05,228 --> 00:03:07,437 But you have a point. 58 00:03:07,472 --> 00:03:08,801 Maybe I've been a little selfish, 59 00:03:08,836 --> 00:03:10,407 putting my research ahead 60 00:03:10,442 --> 00:03:12,442 of your social and emotional development. 61 00:03:12,477 --> 00:03:14,477 I called the people from Northwestern back. 62 00:03:14,512 --> 00:03:15,709 I took the job. 63 00:03:16,580 --> 00:03:17,909 What? 64 00:03:17,944 --> 00:03:19,812 But they need me to start on September 9th. 65 00:03:19,847 --> 00:03:23,387 ♪ I don't want to live With what ifs, might haves ♪ 66 00:03:23,422 --> 00:03:27,050 ♪ Could have been if I had ♪ Cady? 67 00:03:27,085 --> 00:03:31,560 ♪ Only tried, not held back Oh, no ♪ 68 00:03:31,595 --> 00:03:33,694 ♪ That's not a part of my plan ♪ 69 00:03:33,729 --> 00:03:37,027 ♪ That's not the me that I That's not the me that I am ♪ 70 00:03:37,062 --> 00:03:39,535 ♪ This time There's no lookin' back ♪ 71 00:03:40,868 --> 00:03:44,540 ♪ I'm crossing things Off my list ♪ 72 00:03:44,575 --> 00:03:48,280 ♪ Don't want to run out of time Before I wake up and find ♪ 73 00:03:48,315 --> 00:03:50,612 ♪ There was a life That I missed ♪ 74 00:03:51,780 --> 00:03:54,451 ♪ My limit doesn't exist ♪ 75 00:03:57,786 --> 00:03:59,852 [students laughing, chattering] 76 00:04:01,592 --> 00:04:03,592 [school bell ringing] 77 00:04:04,562 --> 00:04:06,188 I'll pick you up at 3:00. 78 00:04:06,223 --> 00:04:07,464 [chuckles] 79 00:04:12,229 --> 00:04:16,198 ♪ I don't want to live With what ifs, might haves ♪ 80 00:04:16,233 --> 00:04:19,938 ♪ Could have been if I had ♪ 81 00:04:19,973 --> 00:04:24,206 ♪ Only tried, not held back Oh, no ♪ 82 00:04:24,241 --> 00:04:27,418 ♪ That's not a part of my plan That's not the me that I am ♪ 83 00:04:27,453 --> 00:04:30,619 ♪ No what ifs, regrets ♪ 84 00:04:30,654 --> 00:04:34,282 ♪ Wear my strengths And weakness ♪ 85 00:04:34,317 --> 00:04:38,759 ♪ I won't hide my feelings Oh, no ♪ 86 00:04:38,794 --> 00:04:41,729 ♪ That's not a part of my plan That's not the... ♪ 87 00:04:41,764 --> 00:04:43,599 [gasps] Bitch, move. 88 00:04:45,603 --> 00:04:47,339 [bubble pops] [chewing] 89 00:04:49,739 --> 00:04:50,771 [garbage bin thumps] 90 00:04:53,105 --> 00:04:54,643 [principal] Hope you all had a good summer. 91 00:04:54,678 --> 00:04:56,106 Mine was pretty good. 92 00:04:56,141 --> 00:04:58,581 I worked in my brother-in-law's 93 00:04:58,616 --> 00:05:00,385 golf pro shop. 94 00:05:00,420 --> 00:05:03,278 Did not make a lot of money, so of course I am back 95 00:05:03,313 --> 00:05:06,149 to help shepherd you all into the future. 96 00:05:06,184 --> 00:05:07,425 [snoring] 97 00:05:09,759 --> 00:05:10,791 [gasps] 98 00:05:11,860 --> 00:05:13,695 May I have everyone's attention, please? 99 00:05:13,730 --> 00:05:16,225 Eyes to the front of the room. 100 00:05:16,260 --> 00:05:19,327 You may notice we have a new student joining us today. 101 00:05:19,362 --> 00:05:20,867 She just moved here from Kentucky. 102 00:05:20,902 --> 00:05:21,967 Kenya. 103 00:05:22,002 --> 00:05:24,442 Kenya. Her name is Caddy. 104 00:05:24,477 --> 00:05:26,334 It's Cady. Cady Heron. 105 00:05:26,369 --> 00:05:28,908 My apologies. I will commit that to memory. 106 00:05:28,943 --> 00:05:32,813 Cady, like the Canadian songstress k.d. lang, 107 00:05:32,848 --> 00:05:36,146 and Heron, like the illegal street drug. 108 00:05:37,116 --> 00:05:39,083 Thank you, Caddy. It's Cady. 109 00:05:39,118 --> 00:05:41,822 Cady, hi. I'm Ms. Norbury. I'll be your homeroom teacher. 110 00:05:41,857 --> 00:05:43,252 This is your roster. 111 00:05:43,287 --> 00:05:45,023 I see I also have you for A.P. Calculus. 112 00:05:45,058 --> 00:05:47,223 You must have had excellent teachers at your old school. 113 00:05:47,258 --> 00:05:49,027 Oh, I was homeschooled. Homeschooled? 114 00:05:49,062 --> 00:05:51,799 Oh, that's a fun way to take jobs from my union. 115 00:05:51,834 --> 00:05:53,328 No, I'm joking. It's fine. Ah. 116 00:05:53,363 --> 00:05:55,297 Um, do you think you can follow this schedule? 117 00:05:55,332 --> 00:05:57,035 Yeah, I think so. Okay, you're gonna be moving 118 00:05:57,070 --> 00:05:58,707 from class to class with each... 119 00:05:58,742 --> 00:06:00,368 [school bell rings] 120 00:06:00,403 --> 00:06:01,237 That's it. 121 00:06:02,174 --> 00:06:03,547 [teacher] Everybody find a seat. 122 00:06:04,209 --> 00:06:05,076 Please. 123 00:06:09,016 --> 00:06:10,983 This is first period: 124 00:06:11,018 --> 00:06:12,721 American Literature. 125 00:06:12,756 --> 00:06:14,492 [rapping] ♪ My name is Mister Rapp ♪ 126 00:06:14,527 --> 00:06:16,626 ♪ And I take no...? ♪ 127 00:06:18,696 --> 00:06:21,191 ♪ My name is Mister Rapp And I take no...? ♪ 128 00:06:21,930 --> 00:06:23,358 "...care of myself"? 129 00:06:23,393 --> 00:06:27,967 "Crap." Correct answer was "crap." 130 00:06:29,267 --> 00:06:30,673 Find a seat. 131 00:06:30,708 --> 00:06:32,400 I don't want you to think of me 132 00:06:32,435 --> 00:06:34,006 as just any other teacher. 133 00:06:34,041 --> 00:06:35,546 I prefer to think of myself 134 00:06:35,581 --> 00:06:37,548 as a time traveler. [school bell rings] 135 00:06:37,583 --> 00:06:41,079 Maintenant nous choisissons nos noms français. 136 00:06:41,917 --> 00:06:43,653 Cady. Comment tu t'appelles? 137 00:06:43,688 --> 00:06:45,853 Je m'appelle Cady. Incorrecte! 138 00:06:45,888 --> 00:06:48,383 You have to pick a French name. 139 00:06:48,418 --> 00:06:49,758 All the French people I know 140 00:06:49,793 --> 00:06:52,024 just call me Cady. [chuckles] 141 00:06:52,059 --> 00:06:53,696 Just say Marie. 142 00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:56,501 Um... Marie? 143 00:06:56,536 --> 00:06:58,195 [in French pronunciation] Marie. 144 00:06:58,230 --> 00:07:00,703 J'anice. J'anice. 145 00:07:00,738 --> 00:07:03,332 Chanel. Non. 146 00:07:03,367 --> 00:07:04,872 Fantine. Non. 147 00:07:04,907 --> 00:07:06,170 Celine Dion? 148 00:07:06,205 --> 00:07:07,171 Non. 149 00:07:07,778 --> 00:07:09,140 Beyoncé. 150 00:07:09,175 --> 00:07:11,076 Quais. Mais non. 151 00:07:11,111 --> 00:07:13,012 [laughing] 152 00:07:13,047 --> 00:07:15,784 Welcome to "Health and Human Sexuality." 153 00:07:15,819 --> 00:07:18,215 Now, this fall we'll be getting 154 00:07:18,250 --> 00:07:21,559 into the state-mandated unit on Abstinence. 155 00:07:21,594 --> 00:07:23,187 Of course then followed by, in the spring, 156 00:07:23,222 --> 00:07:25,222 Condoms and Choking. 157 00:07:25,257 --> 00:07:27,796 Where do you think you're going there, hotshot? 158 00:07:27,831 --> 00:07:29,534 I need to urinate. 159 00:07:29,569 --> 00:07:30,799 No way, José. 160 00:07:30,834 --> 00:07:32,394 Uh, it's Cady. 161 00:07:32,429 --> 00:07:33,802 Well, Cady, 162 00:07:33,837 --> 00:07:35,903 first thing you need to do is ask permission. 163 00:07:35,938 --> 00:07:37,465 But the second thing you'll need 164 00:07:37,500 --> 00:07:39,643 is this lavatory pass 165 00:07:39,678 --> 00:07:41,645 that is shaped like a sperm whale. 166 00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:42,745 Get it? 167 00:07:43,308 --> 00:07:44,714 [Cady] Um... 168 00:07:44,749 --> 00:07:46,782 May I please have the lavatory pass? 169 00:07:46,817 --> 00:07:49,081 No, you may not. You may go sit back down. 170 00:07:49,116 --> 00:07:51,886 You can go at lunch. Nice try, kiddo. 171 00:07:51,921 --> 00:07:53,415 All right, let's jump into this! 172 00:07:53,450 --> 00:07:55,626 This won't be awkward at all, I swear to God. 173 00:07:57,520 --> 00:07:59,597 [students chattering] 174 00:08:34,128 --> 00:08:35,996 [toilet flushing] 175 00:08:41,740 --> 00:08:43,366 This one. [clears throat] 176 00:08:45,942 --> 00:08:48,305 Are you okay in there? 177 00:08:48,340 --> 00:08:49,944 [Cady] Uh, yes. 178 00:08:49,979 --> 00:08:51,539 'Cause you've been in there a very long time. 179 00:08:51,574 --> 00:08:52,980 We're concerned you're either doing drugs 180 00:08:53,015 --> 00:08:54,212 or having a toilet baby. 181 00:08:57,019 --> 00:08:58,689 Hi. I'm Janis. 182 00:08:58,724 --> 00:09:00,350 And je m'appelle Sasha Fierce. 183 00:09:00,385 --> 00:09:01,593 This is Damian. 184 00:09:01,628 --> 00:09:03,056 He is almost too gay to function. 185 00:09:03,091 --> 00:09:05,355 But I push through. I manage. 186 00:09:05,390 --> 00:09:06,829 Hi. 187 00:09:06,864 --> 00:09:07,962 [Damian] We've been watching you all day. 188 00:09:07,997 --> 00:09:09,458 You're a mess. 189 00:09:09,493 --> 00:09:13,704 So we volunteer to amplify your lunch experience. 190 00:09:13,739 --> 00:09:16,707 Yeah, what Damian is saying is we will help you, Caddy. 191 00:09:16,742 --> 00:09:20,777 Thanks so much. Um... it's Cady. 192 00:09:20,812 --> 00:09:22,746 Yeah. I'm gonna call you Caddy. 193 00:09:23,606 --> 00:09:24,847 Get out of the toilet! 194 00:09:24,882 --> 00:09:26,574 Mkay. 195 00:09:26,609 --> 00:09:29,511 You just need to find your clique and commit to it. 196 00:09:29,546 --> 00:09:31,051 You have your Jocks. 197 00:09:31,086 --> 00:09:32,855 [shouting] 198 00:09:32,890 --> 00:09:35,451 Your Corny Horny Band Freaks. 199 00:09:38,929 --> 00:09:40,258 Your Classic Burnouts. 200 00:09:40,293 --> 00:09:42,095 [growls] 201 00:09:42,130 --> 00:09:43,393 Do any of these feel like your people? 202 00:09:43,428 --> 00:09:45,362 I don't think so. [Damian] Hmm... 203 00:09:45,397 --> 00:09:47,364 You know what might be cute for her? 204 00:09:47,399 --> 00:09:48,739 [Janis] What, Grade Grubbers? 205 00:09:48,774 --> 00:09:50,609 [Damian] No, I was gonna say Theater Mess. 206 00:09:56,606 --> 00:09:58,507 And who's at that table? 207 00:09:58,542 --> 00:10:00,916 [indistinct chatter] [Damian] Oh, no, no, no. 208 00:10:00,951 --> 00:10:02,511 We call them the Plastics 209 00:10:02,546 --> 00:10:04,249 'cause they're shiny, fake and hard. 210 00:10:04,284 --> 00:10:05,855 Yeah, that's Gretchen Wieners. 211 00:10:05,890 --> 00:10:08,121 She knows everything about everybody. 212 00:10:08,156 --> 00:10:09,826 [Damian] That's why her hair's so big. 213 00:10:09,861 --> 00:10:11,553 [whispering] It's full of secrets. 214 00:10:11,588 --> 00:10:13,093 And that's Karen Shetty. 215 00:10:13,128 --> 00:10:14,831 She's the dumbest person you'll ever meet. 216 00:10:14,866 --> 00:10:18,197 I once saw her put a D in the word "orange." 217 00:10:18,232 --> 00:10:19,770 [bubbling] 218 00:10:20,905 --> 00:10:23,070 Could I just sit with you guys? 219 00:10:23,875 --> 00:10:25,402 I actually don't know. 220 00:10:25,437 --> 00:10:26,777 We've never been asked that question before. 221 00:10:26,812 --> 00:10:27,976 Could she? 222 00:10:28,011 --> 00:10:30,275 We are very exclusive, 223 00:10:30,310 --> 00:10:33,751 but I think we can make an exception. 224 00:10:33,786 --> 00:10:35,951 [electricity crackles] 225 00:10:35,986 --> 00:10:38,151 What was that? Oh, Lord, it's the Queen Bee. Don't look her in the eye! 226 00:10:38,186 --> 00:10:41,286 [footsteps approaching] 227 00:10:51,331 --> 00:10:56,103 ♪ My name is Regina George ♪ 228 00:10:57,172 --> 00:11:02,142 ♪ And I am a massive deal ♪ 229 00:11:02,980 --> 00:11:05,640 ♪ Fear me, love me ♪ 230 00:11:05,675 --> 00:11:09,347 ♪ Stand and stare at me ♪ 231 00:11:09,382 --> 00:11:11,646 ♪ And these? ♪ 232 00:11:11,681 --> 00:11:13,648 ♪ These are real ♪ 233 00:11:13,683 --> 00:11:17,157 ♪ I've got money and looks ♪ 234 00:11:18,864 --> 00:11:23,328 ♪ I am, like, drunk with power ♪ 235 00:11:23,363 --> 00:11:28,938 ♪ This whole school Humps my leg ♪ 236 00:11:28,973 --> 00:11:32,535 ♪ Like a Chihuahua ♪ 237 00:11:32,570 --> 00:11:37,848 ♪ I'm the prettiest poison You've ever seen ♪ 238 00:11:37,883 --> 00:11:43,018 ♪ That filter you use Looks just like me ♪ 239 00:11:43,053 --> 00:11:47,891 ♪ My name is Regina George ♪ 240 00:11:47,926 --> 00:11:52,830 ♪ And I am a massive deal ♪ 241 00:11:52,865 --> 00:11:57,659 ♪ I don't care who you are ♪ 242 00:11:57,694 --> 00:12:00,233 ♪ I don't care ♪ 243 00:12:00,268 --> 00:12:07,240 ♪ How you feel ♪ 244 00:12:07,275 --> 00:12:08,538 You. 245 00:12:08,573 --> 00:12:10,111 Yeah, you. Come here. 246 00:12:19,254 --> 00:12:20,616 Why don't I know you? 247 00:12:20,651 --> 00:12:23,553 I'm new. I just moved here from Kenya. 248 00:12:23,588 --> 00:12:24,961 Shut up. 249 00:12:25,623 --> 00:12:26,831 Shut up! 250 00:12:26,866 --> 00:12:28,591 I didn't say anything. 251 00:12:28,626 --> 00:12:29,966 You're, like, really pretty. 252 00:12:31,365 --> 00:12:33,431 Thanks. So you agree? 253 00:12:33,466 --> 00:12:34,663 You think you're really pretty? 254 00:12:36,007 --> 00:12:37,600 Oh, I don't know. 255 00:12:37,635 --> 00:12:40,735 You're an international student. That is so fetch. 256 00:12:40,770 --> 00:12:42,044 What is "fetch"? 257 00:12:42,079 --> 00:12:44,948 It's like slang from an old movie. 258 00:12:44,983 --> 00:12:48,116 Juno, I think. [sighs] 259 00:12:48,151 --> 00:12:49,579 Have you ever touched a tiger? 260 00:12:49,614 --> 00:12:52,120 Uh, no, those aren't indigenous to Kenya. 261 00:12:52,155 --> 00:12:54,650 'Cause that's one of my life goals. 262 00:12:54,685 --> 00:12:57,191 To not touch a tiger. 263 00:12:57,226 --> 00:12:59,292 Hey, new girl! You want to see a trick? 264 00:12:59,327 --> 00:13:00,898 I can guess any girl's bra size. 265 00:13:00,933 --> 00:13:02,790 All you got to do is jump one time. 266 00:13:02,825 --> 00:13:04,968 Ew, Jason! Do me. 267 00:13:05,003 --> 00:13:06,563 Oh, my God, Jason. 268 00:13:06,598 --> 00:13:09,599 You do not come to a party at my house with Gretchen 269 00:13:09,634 --> 00:13:11,436 and then skeeze on the new girl right in front of me. 270 00:13:11,471 --> 00:13:13,471 Do you want to have sex with him? 271 00:13:13,506 --> 00:13:15,770 Oh, uh... no, thank you. 272 00:13:15,805 --> 00:13:17,079 Okay, then it's settled. 273 00:13:17,114 --> 00:13:18,410 Jason, no one thinks you're funny. 274 00:13:18,445 --> 00:13:19,741 Okay? And this thing you're doing 275 00:13:19,776 --> 00:13:21,083 where you lower your voice when you talk 276 00:13:21,118 --> 00:13:22,480 is making people really sad. 277 00:13:22,515 --> 00:13:24,482 Excuse me, anyone who would like Jason Weems 278 00:13:24,517 --> 00:13:26,484 to go back to his normal speaking voice, 279 00:13:26,519 --> 00:13:27,452 please raise your hand. 280 00:13:31,821 --> 00:13:32,996 Yeah. 281 00:13:33,625 --> 00:13:34,965 Bitch. 282 00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:36,560 Wow. 283 00:13:36,595 --> 00:13:38,496 You're really gonna get noticed around here. 284 00:13:39,334 --> 00:13:40,531 We should help you. 285 00:13:42,469 --> 00:13:44,271 Can you give us some privacy for a sec? 286 00:13:44,306 --> 00:13:46,339 Oh. Yeah, sure. 287 00:13:48,244 --> 00:13:49,980 [both mouthing words] 288 00:13:50,015 --> 00:13:52,147 [softly] I have your lunch! 289 00:13:53,381 --> 00:13:55,414 All right. 290 00:13:55,449 --> 00:13:57,515 So, we never really do this, but... 291 00:13:57,550 --> 00:13:58,989 ...you're invited to eat lunch with us 292 00:13:59,024 --> 00:14:01,222 for the rest of the week. Oh. Um... 293 00:14:01,257 --> 00:14:03,521 That's okay. On Wednesdays, we wear pink. 294 00:14:04,293 --> 00:14:05,292 [chuckles] 295 00:14:06,658 --> 00:14:08,592 They want me to have lunch with them all week. 296 00:14:08,627 --> 00:14:10,363 [chuckles] That is tits! 297 00:14:10,398 --> 00:14:12,002 She means "that's great." 298 00:14:12,037 --> 00:14:14,037 I don't really get why you guys hate them so much. 299 00:14:14,072 --> 00:14:16,138 Regina seems kind of cool. No, no... [chuckles] 300 00:14:16,173 --> 00:14:17,832 Regina George is not cool. 301 00:14:17,867 --> 00:14:19,702 She's a scum-sucking life ruiner. 302 00:14:19,737 --> 00:14:22,342 Janis hates Regina because when we were in sixth grade, 303 00:14:22,377 --> 00:14:24,509 she told everybody that she was-- Hey, Damian! 304 00:14:24,544 --> 00:14:25,576 What? 305 00:14:25,611 --> 00:14:26,742 Shall we not? 306 00:14:26,777 --> 00:14:28,183 [Damian] I am providing context. 307 00:14:28,218 --> 00:14:29,349 Caddy? 308 00:14:29,384 --> 00:14:31,153 You should have lunch with them 309 00:14:31,188 --> 00:14:33,056 and then report back and tell us 310 00:14:33,091 --> 00:14:35,223 every stupid, moronic thing they said. 311 00:14:35,258 --> 00:14:37,654 Spy on them? That's bad. 312 00:14:37,689 --> 00:14:39,095 No! Look at us. 313 00:14:40,395 --> 00:14:43,000 Would we ever ask you to do something bad? 314 00:14:43,035 --> 00:14:44,628 Uh... 315 00:14:47,270 --> 00:14:48,973 Okay. Yes! 316 00:14:49,008 --> 00:14:51,008 Do you have a pink shirt I can borrow? 317 00:14:51,043 --> 00:14:53,175 No! Yes! What shade? 318 00:14:53,210 --> 00:14:55,507 Welcome to A.P. Calculus. 319 00:14:55,542 --> 00:15:00,743 Congratulations. You know more math than 85% of Americans. 320 00:15:00,778 --> 00:15:03,845 But you will not rest on your laurels this year. 321 00:15:03,880 --> 00:15:06,254 I plan to push you. 322 00:15:06,289 --> 00:15:07,651 So let's get started. 323 00:15:07,686 --> 00:15:10,786 Chapter One, "Limits and Their Properties." 324 00:15:10,821 --> 00:15:12,326 What the heck are limits, you say? 325 00:15:12,361 --> 00:15:13,855 If I write out the equation, 326 00:15:13,890 --> 00:15:16,891 "The limit as x approaches two of [x + 1]," 327 00:15:16,926 --> 00:15:18,761 the function is what we're taking the limit of. 328 00:15:18,796 --> 00:15:20,631 I don't expect you to know how to do this yet. 329 00:15:20,666 --> 00:15:21,896 The limit equals three. 330 00:15:22,536 --> 00:15:24,074 That's right. 331 00:15:24,109 --> 00:15:25,537 Let's try another one. 332 00:15:25,572 --> 00:15:27,374 Find the value of k 333 00:15:27,409 --> 00:15:29,574 for which the following limit exists. 334 00:15:29,609 --> 00:15:31,873 K equals negative three. Damn, girl! 335 00:15:33,646 --> 00:15:34,909 Wow. 336 00:15:36,154 --> 00:15:38,748 Are you trying to make the rest of us feel dumb? 337 00:15:38,783 --> 00:15:41,949 No, I... I'm not trying to. It's just, uh, happening. 338 00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:45,821 Oh, okay, it's like that. All right, um, well... 339 00:15:46,890 --> 00:15:48,263 challenge accepted. 340 00:15:54,469 --> 00:15:55,897 [chuckles] 341 00:15:55,932 --> 00:15:57,965 ♪ When I was nine ♪ 342 00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,571 ♪ I fell in love ♪ 343 00:15:59,606 --> 00:16:01,309 ♪ This Peace Corps guy ♪ 344 00:16:02,840 --> 00:16:05,775 ♪ I waited hours Inside his tent with flowers ♪ 345 00:16:05,810 --> 00:16:08,316 ♪ Which made him laugh Which made me cry ♪ 346 00:16:08,351 --> 00:16:09,977 ♪ By 13 I gave up trying ♪ 347 00:16:10,012 --> 00:16:13,123 ♪ I decided I would be A mathematician ♪ 348 00:16:13,158 --> 00:16:14,751 ♪ 'Cause math is real ♪ 349 00:16:14,786 --> 00:16:16,687 ♪ I memorized a lot of pi ♪ 350 00:16:16,722 --> 00:16:19,327 ♪ Because addition And subtraction and division ♪ 351 00:16:19,362 --> 00:16:22,825 ♪ Would never make me feel So stupid with love ♪ 352 00:16:22,860 --> 00:16:24,266 ♪ I didn't get it ♪ 353 00:16:24,301 --> 00:16:27,368 ♪ I didn't get it, somehow ♪ 354 00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:30,470 ♪ Smart with math But stupid with love ♪ 355 00:16:30,505 --> 00:16:34,441 ♪ I didn't get it I didn't get it till now ♪ 356 00:16:35,774 --> 00:16:38,445 ♪ Mm, mm, mm ♪ 357 00:16:40,009 --> 00:16:42,680 ♪ So thank you, math For being there ♪ 358 00:16:42,715 --> 00:16:44,814 ♪ To bring me joy ♪ 359 00:16:46,092 --> 00:16:47,982 ♪ And thank you, math ♪ 360 00:16:48,017 --> 00:16:51,161 ♪ 'Cause now you've brought me This cute boy ♪ 361 00:16:51,196 --> 00:16:53,460 ♪ He's like someone from TV ♪ 362 00:16:53,495 --> 00:16:56,529 ♪ He's like that guy Who gives out roses To those women ♪ 363 00:16:56,564 --> 00:16:58,300 ♪ His clothes, his grooming ♪ 364 00:16:58,335 --> 00:17:00,401 ♪ And he's a foot away from me ♪ 365 00:17:00,436 --> 00:17:02,799 ♪ With swoopy hair And shiny eyes That I could swim in ♪ 366 00:17:02,834 --> 00:17:04,339 ♪ He's live and in the room! ♪ 367 00:17:04,374 --> 00:17:05,967 [sniffs] 368 00:17:06,002 --> 00:17:07,969 [Ms. Norbury lecturing] [exhales deeply] 369 00:17:10,941 --> 00:17:14,547 ♪ And I'm stupid with love I want to get it ♪ 370 00:17:14,582 --> 00:17:17,715 [group vocalizing] ♪ I want to get it, but how? ♪ 371 00:17:17,750 --> 00:17:21,015 ♪ Smart with math But stupid with love ♪ 372 00:17:21,050 --> 00:17:25,294 ♪ I want to get it I didn't get it till now ♪ 373 00:17:25,329 --> 00:17:28,429 [vocalizing continues] [indistinct chattering] 374 00:17:30,961 --> 00:17:32,730 [laughing] 375 00:17:33,964 --> 00:17:37,108 ♪ I'm astounded and nonplussed ♪ 376 00:17:37,143 --> 00:17:40,067 ♪ I am filled with calcu-lust ♪ 377 00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:43,279 ♪ Does this guy work out? He must ♪ 378 00:17:43,314 --> 00:17:46,381 ♪ All sweaty at the gym ♪ 379 00:17:46,416 --> 00:17:49,483 ♪ Could that image Be more hot? ♪ 380 00:17:49,518 --> 00:17:52,486 ♪ Let me just enjoy That thought ♪ 381 00:17:52,521 --> 00:17:55,456 ♪ School was rough But now it's not ♪ 382 00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:57,755 ♪ 'Cause now there's him ♪ 383 00:17:57,790 --> 00:18:01,231 ♪ Stupid with love I didn't get it ♪ 384 00:18:01,266 --> 00:18:04,366 ♪ I didn't get it, somehow ♪ 385 00:18:04,401 --> 00:18:07,435 ♪ Smart with math But stupid with love ♪ 386 00:18:07,470 --> 00:18:10,834 ♪ I didn't get it I didn't get it till now ♪ 387 00:18:10,869 --> 00:18:12,341 [horn blares] [screams] 388 00:18:14,312 --> 00:18:16,070 [Cady panting] 389 00:18:17,447 --> 00:18:18,413 I'm okay. 390 00:18:18,448 --> 00:18:19,876 [panting] 391 00:18:24,586 --> 00:18:27,290 Mom, you can't pick me up like this. 392 00:18:27,325 --> 00:18:28,555 It's embarrassing. 393 00:18:31,461 --> 00:18:33,230 You can't wear a tank top two days in a row 394 00:18:33,265 --> 00:18:36,431 and you can only wear your hair in a ponytail once a week. 395 00:18:36,466 --> 00:18:38,059 So I guess you've chosen today. 396 00:18:38,094 --> 00:18:42,063 Oh! And we only wear sweats or track pants on Fridays. 397 00:18:42,098 --> 00:18:43,900 If you break any of these rules, 398 00:18:43,935 --> 00:18:45,176 you can't sit with us. 399 00:18:45,211 --> 00:18:47,068 I mean, not just you, like, any of us. 400 00:18:47,103 --> 00:18:48,740 Like if I wore sweatpants today, 401 00:18:48,775 --> 00:18:50,137 I'd have to go sit over there... 402 00:18:50,172 --> 00:18:51,809 [whispering] ...with the Art Freaks. 403 00:18:52,812 --> 00:18:53,877 [Damian chuckles] 404 00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:56,077 That seems fair. 405 00:18:56,112 --> 00:18:58,618 120 calories and 48 calories from fat. 406 00:18:58,653 --> 00:18:59,685 What percent is that? 407 00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:02,149 Um, 48 into 120? 408 00:19:02,184 --> 00:19:03,887 There's no way of knowing. 409 00:19:04,791 --> 00:19:06,461 It's 40%. 410 00:19:06,496 --> 00:19:07,990 42 over 120 411 00:19:08,025 --> 00:19:10,124 equals x over 100, and then you cross-multiply 412 00:19:10,159 --> 00:19:11,664 to get the value of x. 413 00:19:12,337 --> 00:19:14,205 Hmm. 414 00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:15,965 Whatever. Um, I'm getting cheese fries. 415 00:19:20,279 --> 00:19:22,169 [chuckles] 416 00:19:22,204 --> 00:19:24,974 So, have you seen any guys you think are cute yet? 417 00:19:26,615 --> 00:19:30,782 Oh, um, well, actually, there's this one guy in my Calculus class. 418 00:19:30,817 --> 00:19:34,819 Ooh, a senior! Who is it? Uh, Aaron Samuels. 419 00:19:34,854 --> 00:19:37,987 You can't like Aaron Samuels! That is Regina's ex-boyfriend! No. No. Bad. Bad. Danger. 420 00:19:39,430 --> 00:19:42,189 Wait. I thought she dumped him for Shane Oman. 421 00:19:42,224 --> 00:19:43,564 Irregardless! 422 00:19:43,599 --> 00:19:45,027 Ex-boyfriends are off-limits for friends. 423 00:19:45,062 --> 00:19:46,699 That's just, like, the rules of feminism! 424 00:19:50,969 --> 00:19:52,199 Don't worry. 425 00:19:52,234 --> 00:19:54,674 I will never tell Regina what you said. 426 00:19:54,709 --> 00:19:56,544 I am very trustworthy. 427 00:19:56,579 --> 00:19:58,975 Karen's had sex with 11 people and I've never told anyone. 428 00:20:00,583 --> 00:20:01,780 Yo, Golf Bird. 429 00:20:01,815 --> 00:20:04,013 Those fractions were tight. What? 430 00:20:04,048 --> 00:20:07,324 "Caddy Heron." "Golf Bird." 431 00:20:07,359 --> 00:20:09,018 I don't like it. I don't get it. 432 00:20:09,053 --> 00:20:12,021 I'm Kevin Ganatra. I'm from your Calc class. 433 00:20:13,189 --> 00:20:14,991 I sit diagonally from you. 434 00:20:15,026 --> 00:20:17,191 I'm also captain of the North Shore Mathletes. 435 00:20:17,226 --> 00:20:21,129 We're a very chill, dope, extracurricular option. 436 00:20:21,164 --> 00:20:22,702 You know, serve your college rezzy 437 00:20:22,737 --> 00:20:24,836 and your thirst for knolly. Don't say "knolly." 438 00:20:24,871 --> 00:20:27,003 Also Ms. Norbury says we get twice as much funding 439 00:20:27,038 --> 00:20:29,236 if we had a girl on the team, so think about joining, 440 00:20:29,271 --> 00:20:31,007 because we'd love to get jackets. 441 00:20:31,042 --> 00:20:32,910 Okay, yeah, sure. Where do I... 442 00:20:32,945 --> 00:20:34,142 No, no, you cannot join Mathletes. 443 00:20:34,177 --> 00:20:35,418 That is, like, socially ruinous! 444 00:20:35,453 --> 00:20:38,355 Ew, no. Why is he by our table? 445 00:20:38,390 --> 00:20:39,851 I can hear you, by the way. 446 00:20:39,886 --> 00:20:41,424 Can you hear me now? 447 00:20:41,459 --> 00:20:43,888 [softly] Bye. 448 00:20:43,923 --> 00:20:47,122 Uh, anyways, uh, just take my card in case you change your mind? 449 00:20:50,534 --> 00:20:51,566 [sighs] 450 00:20:53,768 --> 00:20:56,472 God, you are so lucky you have us to guide you. 451 00:20:56,507 --> 00:20:58,705 What are you doing after school today? 452 00:20:58,740 --> 00:21:00,443 I want to give you some shoes. 453 00:21:00,478 --> 00:21:02,236 [chuckles] [school bell rings] 454 00:21:03,074 --> 00:21:04,744 What kind of shoes? 455 00:21:04,779 --> 00:21:07,450 I have no idea. I guess, um, something fancier than these? 456 00:21:07,980 --> 00:21:09,980 She's so rude! 457 00:21:10,015 --> 00:21:12,620 I mean, maybe she's just being generous. 458 00:21:12,655 --> 00:21:14,820 Maybe we can have a commensal relationship. 459 00:21:14,855 --> 00:21:17,185 What is that? I want one. 460 00:21:17,220 --> 00:21:20,925 [chuckles] So, in nature, okay, so lions, 461 00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:22,795 they're the apex predators, right? 462 00:21:22,830 --> 00:21:23,961 They're the top of the food chain. 463 00:21:23,996 --> 00:21:26,370 They can kill anything they want. 464 00:21:26,405 --> 00:21:28,570 But if you're a hyena, well, 465 00:21:28,605 --> 00:21:31,639 then you follow them around and you eat the carcasses that they leave behind. 466 00:21:31,674 --> 00:21:33,300 Whoa. Gretchen Wieners is a hyena. 467 00:21:33,335 --> 00:21:34,411 Got it. [chuckles] 468 00:21:34,446 --> 00:21:36,413 No, I did not say that. 469 00:21:36,448 --> 00:21:38,646 I'm just saying, if you're on Regina's good side... 470 00:21:38,681 --> 00:21:40,109 Whoa, Caddy! No, no, no. 471 00:21:40,144 --> 00:21:42,309 Regina George does not have a good side, okay? 472 00:21:42,344 --> 00:21:43,948 If you go over to her house today... 473 00:21:43,983 --> 00:21:45,180 I am not joking, 474 00:21:46,117 --> 00:21:47,622 be careful. 475 00:21:49,989 --> 00:21:51,989 [roaring, chittering] 476 00:21:58,470 --> 00:22:00,437 [Janis] ♪ Don't be fooled by the pink ♪ 477 00:22:00,472 --> 00:22:02,472 ♪ She is not playing dolls ♪ 478 00:22:02,507 --> 00:22:06,443 ♪ She is stalking the halls For the thrill of the kill ♪ 479 00:22:06,478 --> 00:22:10,447 ♪ Every person in school Is aware of her stare ♪ 480 00:22:10,482 --> 00:22:14,451 ♪ When she tosses her hair They go perfectly still ♪ 481 00:22:14,486 --> 00:22:18,455 ♪ All their eyes say "Don't attack me" ♪ 482 00:22:18,490 --> 00:22:22,459 ♪ Watch them sweat And pant and shake ♪ 483 00:22:22,494 --> 00:22:26,826 ♪ Every food chain Has its acme ♪ 484 00:22:26,861 --> 00:22:29,862 ♪ Regina George eats steak ♪ 485 00:22:29,897 --> 00:22:34,603 ♪ She's the queen of beasts She can smell your fear ♪ 486 00:22:34,638 --> 00:22:38,409 ♪ In this biosphere She's the apex predator ♪ 487 00:22:38,444 --> 00:22:40,510 [Damian] ♪ Like a lioness ♪ 488 00:22:40,545 --> 00:22:44,272 ♪ Only with less fur Do not mess with her ♪ 489 00:22:44,307 --> 00:22:46,175 [Janis] ♪ She's the apex predator ♪ 490 00:22:48,883 --> 00:22:51,422 Jason is crotch-sitting Taylor Wedell. 491 00:22:52,414 --> 00:22:54,458 Absolutely not. 492 00:22:54,493 --> 00:22:56,350 ♪ At the watering hole ♪ 493 00:22:56,385 --> 00:22:58,187 ♪ See the girls Who weren't nice ♪ 494 00:22:58,222 --> 00:23:00,387 ♪ Have to scatter like mice ♪ [chittering] 495 00:23:00,422 --> 00:23:02,664 ♪ From a jungle cat ♪ 496 00:23:02,699 --> 00:23:06,327 ♪ And though Janis is great She does not have this power ♪ 497 00:23:06,362 --> 00:23:08,637 ♪ People literally cower ♪ [roars] 498 00:23:08,672 --> 00:23:10,232 ♪ Janis can't do that ♪ 499 00:23:10,267 --> 00:23:14,511 ♪ See her mark her territory ♪ 500 00:23:14,546 --> 00:23:17,415 ♪ As they follow in her train ♪ 501 00:23:18,715 --> 00:23:22,882 ♪ They were victims In their stories ♪ 502 00:23:22,917 --> 00:23:26,457 [Damian, Janis] ♪ Now they shake their mane ♪ 503 00:23:26,492 --> 00:23:30,219 ♪ She's the queen of beasts And you're in her pride ♪ 504 00:23:30,254 --> 00:23:32,287 ♪ You have hitched a ride ♪ 505 00:23:32,322 --> 00:23:34,597 ♪ With the apex predator ♪ 506 00:23:34,632 --> 00:23:38,601 ♪ And it's kind of fun When she bares her claws ♪ 507 00:23:38,636 --> 00:23:40,394 [Damian, Janis] ♪ You think You're safe because ♪ 508 00:23:40,429 --> 00:23:42,165 ♪ You're with The apex predator ♪ 509 00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:44,398 Do you think she'll be mad if I like Aaron? 510 00:23:44,433 --> 00:23:46,741 Samuels? Are you unwell? You can't like Aaron Samuels! 511 00:23:46,776 --> 00:23:47,841 Okay, okay! 512 00:23:47,876 --> 00:23:49,876 I'll be careful. I promise. 513 00:23:52,584 --> 00:23:56,212 [Damian] ♪ Do not think You'll be protected ♪ 514 00:23:56,247 --> 00:24:00,084 ♪ By your new exotic pet ♪ 515 00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:04,451 ♪ Not a chance If she suspected ♪ 516 00:24:04,486 --> 00:24:07,960 ♪ You were any kind Of reproductive threat ♪ 517 00:24:07,995 --> 00:24:10,061 ♪ But she doesn't know yet ♪ 518 00:24:10,096 --> 00:24:12,426 ♪ She doesn't know yet! ♪ 519 00:24:12,461 --> 00:24:16,540 ♪ She's the queen of beasts At this beastly school ♪ 520 00:24:16,575 --> 00:24:20,269 ♪ Got to keep things cool With the apex predator! ♪ 521 00:24:30,116 --> 00:24:31,181 Get in, loser. 522 00:24:34,483 --> 00:24:36,758 ♪ With the apex predator! ♪ 523 00:24:36,793 --> 00:24:40,795 ♪ Will she braid your hair? Will she eat your heart? ♪ 524 00:24:40,830 --> 00:24:44,832 ♪ How can you outsmart ♪ 525 00:24:44,867 --> 00:24:46,603 [Damian] ♪ The apex predator? ♪ 526 00:24:49,003 --> 00:24:50,607 ♪ The apex predator? ♪ 527 00:24:50,642 --> 00:24:52,543 [Damian, Janis] ♪ The apex predator! ♪ 528 00:24:53,502 --> 00:24:56,712 You guys! Hey... 529 00:24:57,682 --> 00:25:00,276 Happy hump day, besties! 530 00:25:00,311 --> 00:25:03,147 Hi, Mrs. George. 531 00:25:03,182 --> 00:25:04,654 This is Cady. 532 00:25:04,689 --> 00:25:06,623 I just moved here. From Kenya. 533 00:25:06,658 --> 00:25:11,122 Welcome, Cady from Kenya. [chuckles] 534 00:25:11,157 --> 00:25:14,994 We haven't had any new meat in our little lady taco in so long. 535 00:25:15,029 --> 00:25:16,259 Mom, go make snacks. 536 00:25:16,294 --> 00:25:18,063 For sure. For sure, Regina, yeah. 537 00:25:18,098 --> 00:25:19,768 Thank you so much, Mrs. George. 538 00:25:19,803 --> 00:25:21,704 You have a beautiful mansion. 539 00:25:21,739 --> 00:25:25,499 Just slay, queens. Slay like no one's watching. 540 00:25:25,534 --> 00:25:28,304 But everybody's watching. Because you're gorgeous! 541 00:25:33,476 --> 00:25:35,619 Wow, your room is really nice. 542 00:25:35,654 --> 00:25:39,150 Thanks. It used to be my parents', but I made them trade me. 543 00:25:47,127 --> 00:25:50,524 Cady! I made you a Spotify playlist 544 00:25:50,559 --> 00:25:52,801 to help you catch up on culture. 545 00:25:52,836 --> 00:25:56,068 Karen, come here. I want to fix your eyebrows. 546 00:25:56,103 --> 00:25:57,201 Can I still have two? 547 00:25:57,236 --> 00:25:59,709 Gretchen, move. Sorry. 548 00:25:59,744 --> 00:26:02,470 God, my hips are so wide. 549 00:26:02,505 --> 00:26:04,109 God, my pores are huge! 550 00:26:04,144 --> 00:26:06,078 I want skin like Cady's. 551 00:26:07,147 --> 00:26:09,213 My B.O. smells like crayons. 552 00:26:12,119 --> 00:26:15,186 Um, me, too! I'm ugly, too. 553 00:26:15,221 --> 00:26:17,661 [chuckles] Oh, my God, I love her. She's like a Martian. 554 00:26:17,696 --> 00:26:19,553 Who's hungry? 555 00:26:19,588 --> 00:26:21,027 Now, Cady, 556 00:26:21,062 --> 00:26:24,558 this is a very American snack called guac. 557 00:26:24,593 --> 00:26:26,934 Is it okay or are you vegan? 558 00:26:26,969 --> 00:26:28,969 Oh, no, I'm an omnivore. 559 00:26:29,004 --> 00:26:31,037 Yum-yum-yum. Okay, come here! 560 00:26:31,072 --> 00:26:33,908 I need you to tell me everything. 561 00:26:33,943 --> 00:26:37,010 Have you seen any boys that you think are cute yet? 562 00:26:37,045 --> 00:26:40,310 Oh. Uh, well, I... [Gretchen coughing] 563 00:26:40,345 --> 00:26:41,949 No. 564 00:26:41,984 --> 00:26:44,413 Well, don't worry. It's just a matter of time. 565 00:26:44,448 --> 00:26:48,219 You know, I always say that this school district has the highest taxes, 566 00:26:48,254 --> 00:26:50,859 but the hottest boys. That's disgusting. 567 00:26:50,894 --> 00:26:53,356 Oh, Regina! You're never gonna believe what I found 568 00:26:53,391 --> 00:26:54,764 in your closet this morning. 569 00:26:54,799 --> 00:26:56,359 Why were you in my closet? 570 00:26:56,394 --> 00:26:58,229 Because I'm doing that Japanese organizing thing 571 00:26:58,264 --> 00:27:00,902 where you take a little nap in the closet. 572 00:27:00,937 --> 00:27:02,398 [Mrs. George gasps] 573 00:27:02,433 --> 00:27:05,566 I found your Burn Book! 574 00:27:05,601 --> 00:27:08,470 Cady, this is just, like, the funniest thing 575 00:27:08,505 --> 00:27:09,944 that the girls used to do. 576 00:27:09,979 --> 00:27:11,407 Please leave. [Mrs. George] You got it, baby. 577 00:27:11,442 --> 00:27:13,178 But, girls, I'm gonna be right downstairs 578 00:27:13,213 --> 00:27:15,081 if you need to talk to me about anything. 579 00:27:15,116 --> 00:27:19,118 I mean it. Deep stuff or boy troubles or blackheads 580 00:27:19,153 --> 00:27:21,450 or alcohol poisoning. 581 00:27:21,485 --> 00:27:23,617 You know, I have been through it all. 582 00:27:23,652 --> 00:27:26,290 Honey, I am not a regular mom. 583 00:27:26,325 --> 00:27:29,260 I'm @coolmom with six O's. 584 00:27:29,295 --> 00:27:31,427 Hashtag AgingHotly. Hashtag... 585 00:27:31,462 --> 00:27:33,462 Get out. [Mrs. George] Okay. 586 00:27:33,497 --> 00:27:35,937 Girls, just have so much fun. 587 00:27:35,972 --> 00:27:40,304 [chuckles] Remember, these are the best days of your life. 588 00:27:41,472 --> 00:27:43,538 It does not get better. 589 00:27:46,312 --> 00:27:49,720 I remember this. It was the week they took all of our phones away. 590 00:27:52,318 --> 00:27:55,451 [Gretchen] "Trang Pham is a grotsky little byotch." 591 00:27:55,486 --> 00:27:56,925 [laughs] Still true. 592 00:27:56,960 --> 00:27:59,961 "Dawn Schweitzer is a horny shrimp." 593 00:27:59,996 --> 00:28:01,655 Well, she's taller now. 594 00:28:01,690 --> 00:28:05,395 [Gretchen] Oh, my God. "Janis 'Imi'ike, Pyro-Lez." 595 00:28:05,430 --> 00:28:06,869 I forgot about that. 596 00:28:06,904 --> 00:28:08,497 Oh, my God, she is so weird. 597 00:28:08,532 --> 00:28:10,532 She is? She's in my homeroom. 598 00:28:10,567 --> 00:28:13,568 Oh, well, watch out, 'cause she's violent. 599 00:28:13,603 --> 00:28:15,812 Yeah, people think she's really good at art, 600 00:28:15,847 --> 00:28:17,979 but it's just 'cause she had to do art therapy. 601 00:28:18,014 --> 00:28:20,674 Yeah, Regina tried to be friends with her in middle school. 602 00:28:20,709 --> 00:28:22,214 Oh, my God, she was obsessed with me. 603 00:28:22,249 --> 00:28:24,645 And then when I got my first boyfriend, Kyle, 604 00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:26,680 she lit my backpack on fire. 605 00:28:28,255 --> 00:28:29,650 [Karen] Who's that? 606 00:28:29,685 --> 00:28:32,026 [Regina] Mmm... That's that kid Damian. 607 00:28:32,061 --> 00:28:34,490 Oh, yeah, he's almost too gay to function. 608 00:28:34,525 --> 00:28:36,195 [laughing] 609 00:28:36,230 --> 00:28:38,164 No, I didn't... I didn't mean that in a bad way. 610 00:28:38,199 --> 00:28:40,265 No, that's funny. Put that in there. 611 00:28:40,300 --> 00:28:41,398 Um... 612 00:28:42,599 --> 00:28:44,500 No, I don't... Oh! No, no. 613 00:28:44,535 --> 00:28:46,634 Don't worry, Cady, we only write stuff about randos in here. 614 00:28:46,669 --> 00:28:49,879 Friends are, like, very deserving of respect. 615 00:28:49,914 --> 00:28:52,376 Gretchen... she gets it. 616 00:28:53,082 --> 00:28:54,147 Go find the shoes. 617 00:28:54,952 --> 00:28:56,248 [chuckles] 618 00:28:56,283 --> 00:28:58,580 The shoes we're giving to Cady. 619 00:28:58,615 --> 00:29:01,990 Oh, my God, you are literally being so annoying. 620 00:29:03,752 --> 00:29:04,619 Sorry. 621 00:29:14,367 --> 00:29:15,663 Are you okay? 622 00:29:15,698 --> 00:29:17,731 No... uh, totally. 623 00:29:17,766 --> 00:29:19,634 Regina's just joking. 624 00:29:19,669 --> 00:29:21,438 These are cute. Try 'em. 625 00:29:23,706 --> 00:29:26,212 Once I processed that Regina's love language is anger, 626 00:29:26,247 --> 00:29:27,312 it's been much... 627 00:29:28,678 --> 00:29:31,118 Aw. 628 00:29:31,153 --> 00:29:33,989 It's the music box I gave Regina that my abuelito gave me. 629 00:29:36,928 --> 00:29:39,258 [music box playing gentle music] 630 00:29:43,759 --> 00:29:46,430 ♪ Tell me What's wrong with me ♪ 631 00:29:46,465 --> 00:29:49,004 ♪ My body, face, my hair ♪ 632 00:29:50,040 --> 00:29:53,767 ♪ Tell me all my many faults ♪ 633 00:29:53,802 --> 00:29:55,637 ♪ Tell me like you care ♪ 634 00:29:55,672 --> 00:29:58,981 ♪ When we both Know you're cruel ♪ 635 00:29:59,016 --> 00:30:02,314 ♪ And we both know You're right ♪ 636 00:30:02,349 --> 00:30:05,581 ♪ I could listen to you ♪ 637 00:30:05,616 --> 00:30:08,683 ♪ Like a fool all night ♪ 638 00:30:08,718 --> 00:30:11,785 ♪ What's wrong with me? ♪ 639 00:30:11,820 --> 00:30:14,821 ♪ How I speak? How I dress? ♪ 640 00:30:14,856 --> 00:30:18,363 ♪ What's wrong with me? ♪ 641 00:30:18,398 --> 00:30:21,938 ♪ You keep me guessing ♪ 642 00:30:21,973 --> 00:30:27,108 ♪ Mama called me "beautiful" Don't believe her anymore ♪ 643 00:30:27,143 --> 00:30:30,639 ♪ Now I'm listening to you ♪ 644 00:30:30,674 --> 00:30:33,983 ♪ What do I do that for? ♪ 645 00:30:34,018 --> 00:30:39,890 ♪ Please don't ignore me ♪ 646 00:30:40,783 --> 00:30:43,256 [humming] 647 00:30:45,095 --> 00:30:46,325 [Regina] Gretchen! 648 00:30:46,360 --> 00:30:47,964 What are you doing in there? 649 00:30:47,999 --> 00:30:49,493 I'm... I'm gonna go. 650 00:30:49,528 --> 00:30:51,693 Yep. Be right there! 651 00:30:54,005 --> 00:30:56,698 [cranking music box] [gentle music resumes] 652 00:30:56,733 --> 00:30:58,975 ♪ What's wrong with me? What can I do? ♪ 653 00:30:59,010 --> 00:31:01,703 ♪ What's wrong with me? Could it be you? ♪ 654 00:31:01,738 --> 00:31:03,309 ♪ It's probably me ♪ 655 00:31:03,344 --> 00:31:06,147 ♪ See that? You see? ♪ 656 00:31:06,182 --> 00:31:09,315 ♪ What's wrong with me? ♪ 657 00:31:09,350 --> 00:31:11,680 [humming] 658 00:31:22,594 --> 00:31:25,166 They have this book, this "Burn Book," 659 00:31:25,201 --> 00:31:27,300 where they write mean things about girls in our grade. 660 00:31:27,335 --> 00:31:29,434 Ooh, ooh! What does it say about me? 661 00:31:30,272 --> 00:31:32,371 Um... you're not in it. 662 00:31:32,901 --> 00:31:34,340 Those bitches! 663 00:31:34,375 --> 00:31:35,902 What is this, by the way? It's terrible. 664 00:31:35,937 --> 00:31:37,607 Oh, it's a Kälteen bar. 665 00:31:37,642 --> 00:31:39,840 Here, my mom used to give them to elderly people in Kapedo 666 00:31:39,875 --> 00:31:42,117 to help them gain weight. Mmm. 667 00:31:42,152 --> 00:31:43,987 I can feel it working. 668 00:31:44,022 --> 00:31:46,418 We should, like, crush this up and put it in Regina's food! 669 00:31:46,453 --> 00:31:47,914 [Cady] What? Oh. 670 00:31:47,949 --> 00:31:49,487 No. No, no. 671 00:31:49,522 --> 00:31:51,357 I will keep having lunch with them, that's it. 672 00:31:51,392 --> 00:31:54,525 Also, we feel bad we yelled at you 673 00:31:54,560 --> 00:31:56,230 about liking Aaron. [groans] 674 00:31:56,265 --> 00:31:58,562 You should go for what you want. 675 00:31:58,597 --> 00:32:00,894 Hetero allyship. Oh, okay. 676 00:32:00,929 --> 00:32:03,699 [Cady] It's so dumb. I only ever see him in Calc anyway. 677 00:32:03,734 --> 00:32:07,406 Oh. You're definitely safe in Calc. 678 00:32:07,441 --> 00:32:09,276 Regina will never set foot in there. 679 00:32:22,753 --> 00:32:24,819 New shoes? Uh, yeah. 680 00:32:24,854 --> 00:32:26,557 Regina gave them to me. 681 00:32:26,592 --> 00:32:29,230 Huh. I didn't know you guys were friends. 682 00:32:29,265 --> 00:32:31,067 [Ms. Norbury] Okay, let's get back into it. 683 00:32:31,102 --> 00:32:32,761 Continuity. Removable discont... 684 00:32:32,796 --> 00:32:34,103 Cady? Eyes up front, please. 685 00:32:35,469 --> 00:32:37,733 Let's get back into where we were Thursday. 686 00:32:37,768 --> 00:32:39,801 Who was awake Thursday? Who was still awake? 687 00:32:41,508 --> 00:32:43,376 [Cady] I like your jacket. 688 00:32:43,411 --> 00:32:44,740 Thanks, I made it. 689 00:32:44,775 --> 00:32:46,610 But why do you sew on top of your drawings? 690 00:32:46,645 --> 00:32:49,481 It's... like the drawings are facts 691 00:32:49,516 --> 00:32:50,911 and the threads are feelings. 692 00:32:50,946 --> 00:32:53,089 It's so cool. [chuckles] 693 00:32:55,654 --> 00:32:58,424 So, you talk to your man yet? 694 00:32:58,459 --> 00:33:00,195 [chuckles] 695 00:33:00,230 --> 00:33:02,131 [Cady] I mean, I don't even know what to say to him. 696 00:33:02,166 --> 00:33:05,266 I always come off sounding like a lunatic. 697 00:33:05,301 --> 00:33:07,202 Do you like gum? Sure. 698 00:33:08,469 --> 00:33:10,964 Oh, I don't have any. I was just... 699 00:33:10,999 --> 00:33:13,241 Oh. [chuckles lightly] 700 00:33:15,872 --> 00:33:19,775 [chuckles] What? Why did you say that? 701 00:33:19,810 --> 00:33:23,152 Maybe just try to have one successful interaction per day? 702 00:33:26,157 --> 00:33:28,454 I like your shirt. Thanks. 703 00:33:28,489 --> 00:33:30,687 It smells like sausage from the last time I wore it. 704 00:33:32,130 --> 00:33:33,162 [both chuckle] 705 00:33:34,198 --> 00:33:36,022 Dear God, woman. 706 00:33:36,057 --> 00:33:39,399 Have you successfully been a functioning human being even once? 707 00:33:41,172 --> 00:33:44,668 On October 3rd, he asked me what day it was. 708 00:33:44,703 --> 00:33:47,374 What day is it? It's October 3rd. 709 00:33:47,409 --> 00:33:51,444 ♪ October 3rd ♪ 710 00:33:51,479 --> 00:33:53,083 That was two weeks ago. 711 00:33:54,449 --> 00:33:55,976 But today I kind of... 712 00:33:56,011 --> 00:33:57,318 I don't know, I tried something 713 00:33:57,353 --> 00:34:00,189 and it just came to me instinctively. 714 00:34:02,017 --> 00:34:03,522 I said I was lost. 715 00:34:03,557 --> 00:34:06,195 I'm totally lost. Can you help me? 716 00:34:07,198 --> 00:34:08,692 But I wasn't lost. 717 00:34:08,727 --> 00:34:10,463 I knew exactly what Ms. Norbury was talking about. 718 00:34:10,498 --> 00:34:14,060 [softly] It's the derivative of the natural log function. 719 00:34:14,095 --> 00:34:16,766 You just take the reciprocal of the ln. 720 00:34:18,473 --> 00:34:19,373 Thanks. 721 00:34:20,607 --> 00:34:22,673 You're so smart. [chuckles] 722 00:34:24,776 --> 00:34:25,907 He was wrong. 723 00:34:25,942 --> 00:34:27,645 Wait, wait. Hold up. 724 00:34:27,680 --> 00:34:29,581 Guys, pause! Oh. 725 00:34:29,616 --> 00:34:30,648 [music stops] 726 00:34:32,388 --> 00:34:34,190 You pretended to be dumb 727 00:34:34,225 --> 00:34:36,720 so you could keep talking to a guy? 728 00:34:36,755 --> 00:34:39,591 Uh... Yeah. It worked. 729 00:34:39,626 --> 00:34:41,428 'Cause that shit always works, Caddy. 730 00:34:41,463 --> 00:34:43,056 It doesn't mean that it's not evil. 731 00:34:43,091 --> 00:34:46,136 Fracking "works." Red-lining "works." 732 00:34:46,171 --> 00:34:48,138 Gasoline and rags... 733 00:34:48,173 --> 00:34:50,569 Aren't you worried Regina will eat your face if she finds out? 734 00:34:50,604 --> 00:34:52,373 No, she won't find out. 735 00:34:52,408 --> 00:34:55,739 It's just my little Calculus class secret. 736 00:34:55,774 --> 00:34:58,379 Oh, um... 737 00:34:58,414 --> 00:35:01,283 So its h prime of x equals five. 738 00:35:01,318 --> 00:35:03,252 You just forgot the Product Rule. 739 00:35:03,287 --> 00:35:04,979 I don't get any of this. 740 00:35:06,587 --> 00:35:07,685 Nice job, Cady. 741 00:35:07,720 --> 00:35:09,522 It sure seems like you get it. 742 00:35:11,152 --> 00:35:12,459 [school bell rings] 743 00:35:15,266 --> 00:35:19,961 Hey, my friend Chris is, uh, having a Halloween party. 744 00:35:19,996 --> 00:35:21,666 Would you want to come to that? 745 00:35:21,701 --> 00:35:24,097 It's like a costume party. People get pretty into it. 746 00:35:24,132 --> 00:35:25,868 Grool. 747 00:35:25,903 --> 00:35:28,772 I meant to say "great," and then I started to say "cool." 748 00:35:28,807 --> 00:35:29,971 Okay. 749 00:35:30,677 --> 00:35:31,874 Grool. 750 00:35:34,384 --> 00:35:35,647 [chuckles] 751 00:35:35,682 --> 00:35:36,846 [dings] 752 00:35:37,519 --> 00:35:38,881 Hi. 753 00:35:38,916 --> 00:35:40,421 ♪ If I could change the world ♪ 754 00:35:40,456 --> 00:35:44,491 ♪ I'd make it Halloween ♪ 755 00:35:45,560 --> 00:35:48,495 ♪ Every single day ♪ 756 00:35:48,530 --> 00:35:51,993 ♪ And also have world peace ♪ 757 00:35:52,028 --> 00:35:55,128 ♪ Maybe world peace Should be first ♪ 758 00:35:55,163 --> 00:35:57,801 ♪ World peace And then Halloween ♪ 759 00:35:57,836 --> 00:35:59,275 Wait, let me start over. 760 00:36:01,543 --> 00:36:02,443 [pings] 761 00:36:02,478 --> 00:36:03,774 Hi. 762 00:36:03,809 --> 00:36:05,171 ♪ If I could change the world ♪ 763 00:36:05,206 --> 00:36:09,648 ♪ I'd make us have world peace ♪ 764 00:36:09,683 --> 00:36:13,586 ♪ And also Halloween ♪ 765 00:36:13,621 --> 00:36:16,017 ♪ Every single day ♪ 766 00:36:16,052 --> 00:36:17,656 ♪ On Halloween ♪ 767 00:36:17,691 --> 00:36:21,693 ♪ You can pretend To be someone else ♪ 768 00:36:21,728 --> 00:36:24,465 ♪ It's like the Internet ♪ 769 00:36:24,500 --> 00:36:30,471 ♪ Only in person And with candy ♪ 770 00:36:30,506 --> 00:36:33,540 Wait. Mama, use the back camera. 771 00:36:33,575 --> 00:36:37,104 It's prettier 'cause science. 772 00:36:37,139 --> 00:36:38,941 ♪ When you are The hot one ♪ 773 00:36:38,976 --> 00:36:40,712 ♪ It's a full-time gig ♪ 774 00:36:40,747 --> 00:36:43,814 ♪ Lookin' like what people Want to see ♪ 775 00:36:43,849 --> 00:36:47,620 ♪ Once a year I'm not I dress up and dream big ♪ 776 00:36:47,655 --> 00:36:49,820 ♪ Disguised as someone else Who is not me ♪ 777 00:36:49,855 --> 00:36:51,426 ♪ But is still hot! ♪ 778 00:36:51,461 --> 00:36:52,724 ♪ I can be ♪ 779 00:36:52,759 --> 00:36:55,331 ♪ Who I want to be and sexy! ♪ 780 00:36:55,366 --> 00:36:58,697 ♪ I can be Who I want to be and hot! ♪ 781 00:36:58,732 --> 00:37:02,404 ♪ Don't like who you are Then hit that costume shop ♪ 782 00:37:02,439 --> 00:37:06,199 ♪ Rock a new And different sexy look ♪ 783 00:37:06,234 --> 00:37:09,510 ♪ Why be so downhearted? Blast some trashy pop ♪ 784 00:37:09,545 --> 00:37:12,810 ♪ And drop it to this hot And sexy hook ♪ 785 00:37:12,845 --> 00:37:17,012 ♪ I can be Who I want to be and sexy! ♪ 786 00:37:17,047 --> 00:37:20,587 ♪ I can be Who I want to be and hot! ♪ 787 00:37:20,622 --> 00:37:23,722 ♪ Be somebody new ♪ 788 00:37:23,757 --> 00:37:27,891 ♪ Do a total transformation ♪ 789 00:37:27,926 --> 00:37:31,367 ♪ Animal or mineral, too ♪ 790 00:37:31,402 --> 00:37:35,437 ♪ Or even vegetation! ♪ 791 00:37:35,472 --> 00:37:37,197 I give you sexy corn. 792 00:37:37,232 --> 00:37:40,475 ♪ I can be who I want to be ♪ 793 00:37:40,510 --> 00:37:43,445 ♪ And sexy! ♪ 794 00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:45,876 [upbeat dance music playing over speakers] 795 00:37:49,112 --> 00:37:51,112 [teenagers scream] [music stops] 796 00:37:54,216 --> 00:37:55,886 Why are you dressed so scary? 797 00:37:55,921 --> 00:37:57,250 It's Halloween. 798 00:37:57,285 --> 00:37:58,889 Cady, if you don't dress slutty, 799 00:37:58,924 --> 00:38:00,594 that is slut-shaming us. 800 00:38:05,964 --> 00:38:09,438 Um, it's just, like, traditionally, 801 00:38:09,473 --> 00:38:11,198 girls had to be witches or clowns 802 00:38:11,233 --> 00:38:14,201 and we've worked really hard to progress past that. 803 00:38:14,236 --> 00:38:16,005 [Cady] That makes sense. 804 00:38:18,482 --> 00:38:20,548 I'm gonna go find Aaron. 805 00:38:20,583 --> 00:38:21,615 Okay. 806 00:38:22,519 --> 00:38:23,980 [mouths] 807 00:38:24,015 --> 00:38:26,719 ♪ A sexy Quint From sexy Jaws ♪ 808 00:38:26,754 --> 00:38:28,424 ♪ Catching sexy sharks ♪ 809 00:38:28,459 --> 00:38:31,988 ♪ Sexy Eleanor Roosevelt Or sexy Joan of Arc ♪ 810 00:38:32,023 --> 00:38:35,761 ♪ I can be a sexy pirate Or a sexy ballet dancer ♪ 811 00:38:35,796 --> 00:38:40,601 ♪ I can be a sexy doctor And cure some sexy cancer! ♪ 812 00:38:40,636 --> 00:38:42,636 That's not right, is it? No. 813 00:38:43,705 --> 00:38:45,606 I can sexy cure some cancer? 814 00:38:45,641 --> 00:38:47,102 No. 815 00:38:47,137 --> 00:38:49,236 I can cure sex cancer! 816 00:38:49,271 --> 00:38:51,304 Sex cancer doesn't exist. 817 00:38:51,339 --> 00:38:53,614 [gasps] I did it. 818 00:38:53,649 --> 00:38:54,615 Dance break. 819 00:38:54,650 --> 00:38:56,111 [dubstep music playing] 820 00:38:56,685 --> 00:38:57,882 [vocalizing] 821 00:39:06,728 --> 00:39:08,497 [all] ♪ Happy Halloween! ♪ 822 00:39:12,063 --> 00:39:15,966 ♪ This is Modern feminism talkin' ♪ 823 00:39:16,001 --> 00:39:19,541 ♪ Watch me as I run the world In shoes I cannot walk in ♪ 824 00:39:19,576 --> 00:39:22,973 ♪ I can be who I want to be ♪ 825 00:39:23,008 --> 00:39:26,614 ♪ And sex... sex ♪ 826 00:39:26,649 --> 00:39:30,717 ♪ Sexy! ♪ 827 00:39:32,182 --> 00:39:35,018 I'm a sexy mouse. Duh! 828 00:39:35,053 --> 00:39:36,888 [electronic music playing over speakers] 829 00:39:36,923 --> 00:39:38,527 [teenagers chattering] 830 00:39:38,562 --> 00:39:40,023 Hey. Hi. 831 00:39:40,058 --> 00:39:41,354 [Aaron] Cady! 832 00:39:41,389 --> 00:39:43,026 [Karen yelps] Hi! 833 00:39:43,061 --> 00:39:45,358 [Karen] Ow. Hey. [screams playfully] 834 00:39:45,393 --> 00:39:47,063 [chuckles] I like your costume. 835 00:39:47,098 --> 00:39:48,966 Different from everyone else's. 836 00:39:49,001 --> 00:39:51,837 [chuckles] I didn't know I was supposed to... 837 00:39:51,872 --> 00:39:53,036 [both chuckle] 838 00:39:53,071 --> 00:39:54,741 I'm such a weird foreign loser. 839 00:39:54,776 --> 00:39:56,369 No. It's great. 840 00:39:57,680 --> 00:39:58,910 You want a drink? 841 00:39:58,945 --> 00:40:00,978 Thanks. Uh, do they have juice? 842 00:40:02,443 --> 00:40:04,245 I can check. Wait here. 843 00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:09,888 I think you and Aaron would be a really cute couple. 844 00:40:09,923 --> 00:40:11,219 Really? Yeah. 845 00:40:11,254 --> 00:40:12,759 I just said so. Don't be thirsty. 846 00:40:12,794 --> 00:40:15,993 You know, I could talk to him for you. If you want. 847 00:40:16,028 --> 00:40:18,259 See if he likes you back. 848 00:40:18,294 --> 00:40:20,602 You would do that for me? Mm-hmm. 849 00:40:20,637 --> 00:40:23,198 Trust me. I know exactly how to play it. 850 00:40:26,907 --> 00:40:29,402 I need to talk to you. Me? 851 00:40:29,437 --> 00:40:31,206 I thought you were done talking to me 852 00:40:31,241 --> 00:40:32,944 when you started talking to Shane last summer. 853 00:40:32,979 --> 00:40:36,277 Shut up. 'Cause you know that homeschooled girl, Cady? 854 00:40:37,412 --> 00:40:38,917 Yeah, I invited her tonight. 855 00:40:40,250 --> 00:40:41,920 Yeah, well, be careful. 856 00:40:41,955 --> 00:40:43,658 'Cause she has a huge crush on you. 857 00:40:43,693 --> 00:40:46,452 [laughs] Really? 858 00:40:46,487 --> 00:40:48,058 Don't be gross. 859 00:40:48,698 --> 00:40:50,566 She's my friend and... 860 00:40:50,601 --> 00:40:54,295 [sighs] ...she's, like, really inexperienced and, um... 861 00:41:00,006 --> 00:41:02,402 Wow, sorry. 862 00:41:02,437 --> 00:41:04,470 I didn't think this would be so hard for me. 863 00:41:04,505 --> 00:41:05,746 What? 864 00:41:05,781 --> 00:41:07,275 I don't know, I guess I just... 865 00:41:07,310 --> 00:41:10,476 just have, like, a lot of, like, unresolved trauma 866 00:41:10,511 --> 00:41:12,247 from how things ended with us. 867 00:41:12,282 --> 00:41:13,754 Give me a break. 868 00:41:15,186 --> 00:41:16,251 [scoffs] 869 00:41:17,628 --> 00:41:18,660 Regina. 870 00:41:20,829 --> 00:41:22,631 Regina. Leave me alone. 871 00:41:22,666 --> 00:41:24,567 G, why are you upset? 872 00:41:24,602 --> 00:41:25,799 Please. 873 00:41:25,834 --> 00:41:28,967 [Aaron] What do you mean, please? G! 874 00:41:29,002 --> 00:41:31,200 [ominous intro music playing] 875 00:41:41,619 --> 00:41:44,620 [Regina] ♪ Yes, I look perfect ♪ 876 00:41:44,655 --> 00:41:47,084 ♪ Ice Queen That's what you see ♪ 877 00:41:47,119 --> 00:41:50,483 ♪ It's what they all expect From me ♪ 878 00:41:50,518 --> 00:41:53,420 ♪ But it's all show ♪ 879 00:41:53,455 --> 00:41:56,258 ♪ Face it, you used me ♪ 880 00:41:56,293 --> 00:41:59,063 ♪ You saw the sexy clothes ♪ 881 00:41:59,098 --> 00:42:02,902 ♪ My supermodel pose ♪ 882 00:42:02,937 --> 00:42:05,201 ♪ What did you know? ♪ 883 00:42:05,236 --> 00:42:08,369 ♪ Was I a game to you? ♪ 884 00:42:08,404 --> 00:42:11,207 ♪ Was I a way to be cool? ♪ 885 00:42:11,242 --> 00:42:14,507 ♪ I truly cared ♪ 886 00:42:14,542 --> 00:42:17,345 ♪ Was I the fool? ♪ 887 00:42:17,380 --> 00:42:19,952 ♪ It's fine for you ♪ 888 00:42:19,987 --> 00:42:23,153 ♪ It's fine to flirt ♪ 889 00:42:23,188 --> 00:42:28,158 ♪ It's fine ♪ 890 00:42:28,193 --> 00:42:29,731 ♪ Till someone gets hurt ♪ 891 00:42:29,766 --> 00:42:31,733 [rustling] 892 00:42:35,596 --> 00:42:38,069 ♪ Feel my heart beating? ♪ 893 00:42:38,104 --> 00:42:41,204 ♪ I'm just like her or you ♪ 894 00:42:41,239 --> 00:42:44,372 ♪ People forget I'm human, too ♪ 895 00:42:44,407 --> 00:42:46,539 ♪ Yes, they do that ♪ 896 00:42:47,850 --> 00:42:50,576 ♪ This is performance ♪ 897 00:42:50,611 --> 00:42:53,689 ♪ This is all self-defense ♪ 898 00:42:53,724 --> 00:42:56,824 ♪ I thought you had the sense ♪ 899 00:42:56,859 --> 00:42:59,354 ♪ To see through that ♪ 900 00:42:59,389 --> 00:43:02,258 ♪ Was I too proud with you? ♪ 901 00:43:02,293 --> 00:43:05,668 ♪ Was I too cold And forbidding? ♪ 902 00:43:05,703 --> 00:43:08,869 ♪ You chose her over me Well ♪ 903 00:43:08,904 --> 00:43:11,366 ♪ Are you kidding? ♪ 904 00:43:11,401 --> 00:43:13,940 ♪ It's fine for you ♪ 905 00:43:13,975 --> 00:43:16,305 ♪ It's fine to flirt ♪ 906 00:43:17,176 --> 00:43:22,047 ♪ It's fine ♪ 907 00:43:22,082 --> 00:43:24,082 ♪ Till someone gets hurt ♪ 908 00:43:24,117 --> 00:43:26,183 [intense rock music playing] 909 00:43:28,286 --> 00:43:33,553 ♪ Till someone gets hurt! ♪ 910 00:43:35,425 --> 00:43:37,095 ♪ Poor little me ♪ 911 00:43:37,130 --> 00:43:41,099 ♪ I'm trapped In this fabulous show ♪ 912 00:43:41,134 --> 00:43:43,970 ♪ You could set me free ♪ 913 00:43:44,005 --> 00:43:48,777 ♪ But if you're going, go ♪ 914 00:43:51,276 --> 00:43:54,376 ♪ It's fine for you ♪ 915 00:43:54,411 --> 00:43:57,148 ♪ It's fine to flirt ♪ 916 00:43:57,183 --> 00:44:00,415 ♪ And, God, you're hot! ♪ 917 00:44:00,450 --> 00:44:03,385 ♪ Why do you even Wear a shirt? ♪ 918 00:44:03,420 --> 00:44:07,422 ♪ No, it's fine ♪ 919 00:44:07,457 --> 00:44:09,556 ♪ Damn, you're fine! ♪ 920 00:44:09,591 --> 00:44:14,803 ♪ And it's fine ♪ 921 00:44:14,838 --> 00:44:16,101 ♪ Till someone gets... ♪ 922 00:44:16,136 --> 00:44:18,972 [gasps] [intense outro music playing] 923 00:44:30,150 --> 00:44:32,447 [suspenseful music playing over TV] 924 00:44:42,162 --> 00:44:43,194 [screams] 925 00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:47,968 She took him back. She took Aaron back. 926 00:44:48,003 --> 00:44:49,937 Of course she did. 927 00:44:49,972 --> 00:44:52,698 It's because Regina's a life ruiner! 928 00:44:52,733 --> 00:44:54,304 When we were in sixth grade, she told everybody 929 00:44:54,339 --> 00:44:55,877 that Janis was... Damian! 930 00:44:55,912 --> 00:44:57,978 Okay. She does not need to hear that right now. 931 00:44:58,013 --> 00:45:00,178 No, I know the story. 932 00:45:00,213 --> 00:45:02,851 You lit a fire 'cause Regina got a boyfriend. 933 00:45:02,886 --> 00:45:04,446 [Damian] She said what? 934 00:45:04,481 --> 00:45:05,821 Oh, hell no. 935 00:45:05,856 --> 00:45:09,286 Damian... No! The truth will be told. 936 00:45:09,321 --> 00:45:10,518 Stay with me, Cady. 937 00:45:15,030 --> 00:45:18,427 Like all history, this is emotionally layered and culturally dense. 938 00:45:22,268 --> 00:45:24,873 Janis and Regina were best friends in middle school. 939 00:45:24,908 --> 00:45:29,141 And at that time, females expressed their identities through collectible plushies. 940 00:45:29,176 --> 00:45:30,879 I don't know what those... 941 00:45:30,914 --> 00:45:35,180 It's these bastards. And they were everywhere. 942 00:45:35,215 --> 00:45:38,744 Regina gave Janis a BFF set for her birthday. 943 00:45:38,779 --> 00:45:41,021 Janis put a rainbow patch on hers. 944 00:45:41,056 --> 00:45:42,858 This is how she came out to her friend. 945 00:45:42,893 --> 00:45:44,288 And Regina put one on hers, too, 946 00:45:44,323 --> 00:45:47,093 out of allyship because she used to be human. 947 00:45:47,128 --> 00:45:52,065 Cut to eight months later, Regina becomes obsessed with this gross boy. Kyle! 948 00:45:52,100 --> 00:45:54,463 Your scale is completely off. Hush! 949 00:45:56,434 --> 00:45:58,698 One night, they were all playing spin the bottle... 950 00:45:58,733 --> 00:46:01,701 And Regina was worried that Kyle liked Karen more. 951 00:46:01,736 --> 00:46:05,078 So when she spun and got Janis, 952 00:46:05,916 --> 00:46:07,443 Regina put on a little show. 953 00:46:10,019 --> 00:46:11,018 [dolls gasp] 954 00:46:11,053 --> 00:46:12,481 And Kyle was like "boing"! 955 00:46:12,516 --> 00:46:13,922 And Regina was like... 956 00:46:13,957 --> 00:46:15,352 [as Regina] ..."I knew she would let me! 957 00:46:15,387 --> 00:46:17,827 She's, like, obsessed with me!" 958 00:46:17,862 --> 00:46:19,257 [in normal voice] Not okay. 959 00:46:19,292 --> 00:46:21,226 Please put this all back in its box. 960 00:46:21,261 --> 00:46:23,063 They got into a huge fight. 961 00:46:23,098 --> 00:46:25,032 Regina started avoiding Janis at school, 962 00:46:25,067 --> 00:46:26,902 but did she give back that plush animal? 963 00:46:26,937 --> 00:46:29,762 Oh, no. She took it everywhere. 964 00:46:29,797 --> 00:46:32,600 She named her "Sissy Liz" and she made everyone say 965 00:46:32,635 --> 00:46:33,975 "good morning" to it every day, 966 00:46:34,010 --> 00:46:35,372 and it was very weird and boring. 967 00:46:35,407 --> 00:46:36,637 Fast forward. 968 00:46:36,672 --> 00:46:38,573 [Damian] One day in Science, 969 00:46:38,608 --> 00:46:41,279 Regina was making everyone say hi to Sissy Liz. 970 00:46:41,314 --> 00:46:43,281 And Janis finally heard it. 971 00:46:43,316 --> 00:46:45,888 "Sissy Liz" was short for "Obsessed Lesbian." 972 00:46:45,923 --> 00:46:48,990 Regina had been making fun of Janis this entire time 973 00:46:49,025 --> 00:46:50,321 and everyone but her knew it. 974 00:46:51,357 --> 00:46:53,489 So, and this is regrettable... 975 00:46:55,900 --> 00:46:57,295 Janis took her Bunsen burner... 976 00:46:59,200 --> 00:47:01,827 and torched the doll. 977 00:47:01,862 --> 00:47:04,137 And Regina's backpack caught on fire a little bit 978 00:47:04,172 --> 00:47:07,338 and Janis was kicked out of school for the remainder of the year. 979 00:47:07,373 --> 00:47:09,835 And the adults didn't know why. 980 00:47:09,870 --> 00:47:12,211 Janis just seemed crazy. 981 00:47:14,578 --> 00:47:16,512 I'm really sorry that happened. 982 00:47:18,483 --> 00:47:20,054 It's worse than my thing. 983 00:47:21,552 --> 00:47:23,255 Caddy, don't be sorry. 984 00:47:23,290 --> 00:47:26,621 Now you know Regina George is not your friend. 985 00:47:26,656 --> 00:47:28,425 We are your friends. 986 00:47:28,460 --> 00:47:29,932 And we're gonna make her pay. 987 00:47:31,793 --> 00:47:33,793 [backup singers singing] 988 00:47:33,828 --> 00:47:35,036 [Janis] ♪ You know what friends do? ♪ 989 00:47:35,071 --> 00:47:37,038 ♪ They got your back ♪ 990 00:47:37,073 --> 00:47:39,975 ♪ And they are fun To be around ♪ ♪ Whoa ♪ 991 00:47:40,010 --> 00:47:42,175 ♪ When someone hurts you Then they attack ♪ 992 00:47:42,210 --> 00:47:44,705 ♪ And grind your foe Into the ground! ♪ 993 00:47:44,740 --> 00:47:46,608 ♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪ 994 00:47:46,643 --> 00:47:49,149 [Janis] ♪ Imagine a party With dresses and cake ♪ 995 00:47:49,184 --> 00:47:52,119 ♪ And singing and dancing And cake ♪ 996 00:47:52,154 --> 00:47:55,485 ♪ And there's a magic act That saws Regina in half ♪ 997 00:47:55,520 --> 00:47:59,093 ♪ And this time It'll take ♪ [screaming] 998 00:47:59,128 --> 00:48:03,328 Now that's a party! ♪ It's a revenge party A party that ends ♪ 999 00:48:03,363 --> 00:48:05,561 ♪ With somebody's head On a spike ♪ 1000 00:48:05,596 --> 00:48:09,532 ♪ It's a revenge party With your two best friends ♪ 1001 00:48:09,567 --> 00:48:12,271 ♪ It's like a party With revenge Is what it's like ♪ 1002 00:48:13,769 --> 00:48:15,208 Caddy, in order for this to work, 1003 00:48:15,243 --> 00:48:16,803 you need to act like a huge phony. 1004 00:48:16,838 --> 00:48:18,277 Can you do it? 1005 00:48:18,312 --> 00:48:19,476 I... I think so. 1006 00:48:19,511 --> 00:48:21,346 Practice. 1007 00:48:21,381 --> 00:48:24,382 Regina wanted me to tell you that she tried to talk to Aaron, 1008 00:48:24,417 --> 00:48:27,583 but he just wanted her back, and that's not Regina's fault. 1009 00:48:27,618 --> 00:48:29,321 Of course. Oh, my gosh. 1010 00:48:30,225 --> 00:48:31,686 Love ya. See you at lunch. 1011 00:48:31,721 --> 00:48:34,590 Perfect! On to phase two. 1012 00:48:34,625 --> 00:48:36,999 ♪ I'll bring The glow sticks ♪ 1013 00:48:37,034 --> 00:48:40,002 ♪ I'll bring balloons And we'll have Chocolate ice cream cones ♪ 1014 00:48:40,037 --> 00:48:41,729 ♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪ 1015 00:48:41,764 --> 00:48:44,237 ♪ I'll be the DJ Spinnin' the tunes ♪ 1016 00:48:44,272 --> 00:48:47,306 ♪ On a turntable made Of her bones ♪ 1017 00:48:47,341 --> 00:48:50,606 [Janis] ♪ We'll get a piñata 'Cause that would be fun ♪ 1018 00:48:50,641 --> 00:48:52,179 ♪ And play dress up And Barbies ♪ 1019 00:48:52,214 --> 00:48:53,807 ♪ And tag ♪ [chainsaw whirring] 1020 00:48:53,842 --> 00:48:55,248 ♪ And we'll roll on the grass ♪ 1021 00:48:55,283 --> 00:48:57,085 ♪ And stare up at the sun ♪ 1022 00:48:57,120 --> 00:48:59,945 ♪ Then we'll stuff her remains In a bag ♪ 1023 00:48:59,980 --> 00:49:01,749 ♪ And throw 'em in the river! ♪ 1024 00:49:01,784 --> 00:49:05,060 [Janis] ♪ A revenge party A party that ends ♪ 1025 00:49:05,095 --> 00:49:07,755 ♪ With entrails All over the lawn ♪ 1026 00:49:07,790 --> 00:49:11,033 [Damian, Janis] ♪ A revenge party With your two best friends ♪ 1027 00:49:11,068 --> 00:49:13,563 ♪ And I end up with Aaron When she's gone ♪ 1028 00:49:13,598 --> 00:49:15,763 ♪ Yes, bitch! ♪ 1029 00:49:17,338 --> 00:49:19,701 I end up with Aaron when she's gone. 1030 00:49:20,308 --> 00:49:21,637 Yes, bitch. 1031 00:49:26,446 --> 00:49:27,346 [gasps] 1032 00:49:31,187 --> 00:49:32,582 I think I need a tutor. 1033 00:49:32,617 --> 00:49:34,848 I could tutor you, if you want. 1034 00:49:36,357 --> 00:49:38,423 ♪ What's Regina doin'? ♪ 1035 00:49:38,458 --> 00:49:39,820 ♪ What's Regina wearin'? ♪ 1036 00:49:39,855 --> 00:49:42,064 ♪ Is she back with Aaron? ♪ 1037 00:49:42,099 --> 00:49:45,826 ♪ Regina! Regina! She has everything She gets everything ♪ 1038 00:49:47,467 --> 00:49:49,269 ♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪ 1039 00:49:50,272 --> 00:49:51,469 [Gretchen] What is that? 1040 00:49:51,504 --> 00:49:53,141 Ugh, I'm so fat and disgusting. 1041 00:49:53,176 --> 00:49:54,472 I'm not having anything 1042 00:49:54,507 --> 00:49:56,276 but Kälteen bars until I lose weight. 1043 00:49:56,311 --> 00:49:57,838 Well, I need to lose three pounds. 1044 00:49:57,873 --> 00:49:59,004 How many calories from fat? 1045 00:49:59,039 --> 00:50:00,280 Zero. 1046 00:50:00,315 --> 00:50:02,117 You cross-multiply x over a thousand 1047 00:50:02,152 --> 00:50:03,943 and divide it by 0.5 because it's in kilograms. 1048 00:50:03,978 --> 00:50:06,517 Whatever. Bring me a whole box. 1049 00:50:06,552 --> 00:50:08,684 No, um, bring me two. 1050 00:50:09,819 --> 00:50:11,654 [marching band music playing] 1051 00:50:15,726 --> 00:50:18,991 ♪ A revenge party A party that ends ♪ 1052 00:50:19,026 --> 00:50:21,796 ♪ With somebody crushed And alone ♪ ♪ And ugly-crying! ♪ 1053 00:50:21,831 --> 00:50:24,997 ♪ A revenge party With your two best friends ♪ 1054 00:50:25,032 --> 00:50:27,505 ♪ It's like a party With revenge Is what we're throwin'! ♪ 1055 00:50:27,540 --> 00:50:29,177 [screams] 1056 00:50:29,212 --> 00:50:30,706 [marching band playing upbeat music] 1057 00:50:30,741 --> 00:50:34,006 [yelping] [spectators clamor] 1058 00:50:38,650 --> 00:50:40,716 [mouthing] 1059 00:50:41,983 --> 00:50:44,357 [camera shutter clicking] 1060 00:50:44,392 --> 00:50:46,326 ♪ What's Regina eating? ♪ 1061 00:50:46,361 --> 00:50:48,097 ♪ God, look at her figure ♪ 1062 00:50:48,132 --> 00:50:50,858 ♪ Did her boobs get bigger? Regina! Regina! ♪ 1063 00:50:50,893 --> 00:50:52,662 ♪ She has everything! ♪ [camera shutter clicks] 1064 00:50:52,697 --> 00:50:54,862 ♪ She gets everything! ♪ [camera shutter clicking] 1065 00:50:54,897 --> 00:50:57,403 ♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪ 1066 00:51:01,442 --> 00:51:04,377 Six weeks and all we've done is make Regina hotter and revive the wet look. 1067 00:51:04,412 --> 00:51:06,313 We have to pivot. 1068 00:51:06,348 --> 00:51:08,909 If we can make Gretchen Wieners think that Regina is mad at her... 1069 00:51:08,944 --> 00:51:10,812 No, no, no. Gretchen is fragile. 1070 00:51:10,847 --> 00:51:12,748 Exactly! 1071 00:51:12,783 --> 00:51:14,552 If we crack her open, maybe she'll spill something we can use. 1072 00:51:14,587 --> 00:51:16,422 [French teacher clears throat] 1073 00:51:22,430 --> 00:51:24,397 ♪ Party ♪ 1074 00:51:24,432 --> 00:51:26,927 Hey, girl, you sending any candy canes this year? 1075 00:51:26,962 --> 00:51:29,897 Oh. [chuckles] I don't send them. I just get them. 1076 00:51:31,439 --> 00:51:33,934 Um, stop pulling it down. 1077 00:51:33,969 --> 00:51:36,112 Your hair looks so sexy pushed back. 1078 00:51:37,181 --> 00:51:38,906 Cady, would you please tell him 1079 00:51:38,941 --> 00:51:41,007 that his hair looks sexy pushed back? 1080 00:51:42,648 --> 00:51:44,681 Your hair looks sexy pushed back. 1081 00:51:44,716 --> 00:51:45,748 Oh... 1082 00:51:51,327 --> 00:51:52,392 Thanks. 1083 00:51:56,332 --> 00:51:58,365 I'll, uh, see you in Calc. 1084 00:52:00,468 --> 00:52:03,205 ♪ At every party There might be a low ♪ 1085 00:52:03,240 --> 00:52:06,802 ♪ Where the energy dips ♪ ♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪ 1086 00:52:06,837 --> 00:52:13,710 ♪ You might be thinking "It's late, we should go And they ran out of chips" ♪ 1087 00:52:13,745 --> 00:52:17,483 ♪ No! I can't even watch When she touches his hair ♪ 1088 00:52:17,518 --> 00:52:20,189 ♪ And I've watched a snake Eat a cow ♪ 1089 00:52:20,224 --> 00:52:23,819 ♪ Regina needs to be toppled Sorry, Gretchen, I swear ♪ 1090 00:52:23,854 --> 00:52:26,954 ♪ We'll get our party now! ♪ 1091 00:52:26,989 --> 00:52:29,022 One candy cane, please! 1092 00:52:31,499 --> 00:52:34,929 ♪ A revenge party A party that ends ♪ 1093 00:52:34,964 --> 00:52:37,129 ♪ With lions in a Roman arena ♪ 1094 00:52:37,164 --> 00:52:39,967 ♪ She has everything! She gets everything! ♪ 1095 00:52:41,311 --> 00:52:43,102 ♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪ 1096 00:52:43,137 --> 00:52:44,873 Ho, ho, ho! 1097 00:52:44,908 --> 00:52:47,139 Candy Cane Gram for Shane Oman! 1098 00:52:47,174 --> 00:52:48,580 ♪ She has everything! ♪ 1099 00:52:48,615 --> 00:52:50,648 [Damian] And one for Cady Heron. 1100 00:52:50,683 --> 00:52:52,012 ♪ She gets everything! ♪ 1101 00:52:52,047 --> 00:52:54,080 Four for Glenn Cocco? 1102 00:52:54,115 --> 00:52:55,983 You go, Glenn Cocco! 1103 00:52:56,018 --> 00:52:58,018 ♪ Glenn Cocco! Glenn Cocco! Glenn Cocco! ♪ 1104 00:52:59,329 --> 00:53:02,990 And... none for Gretchen Wieners, bye. 1105 00:53:03,729 --> 00:53:04,827 Who sent that? 1106 00:53:04,862 --> 00:53:06,125 Oh, it's from... 1107 00:53:06,160 --> 00:53:08,270 ♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪ 1108 00:53:08,305 --> 00:53:11,537 "Thanks for being such a great best friend." 1109 00:53:11,572 --> 00:53:12,538 Aw. 1110 00:53:13,409 --> 00:53:14,672 Oh. 1111 00:53:15,840 --> 00:53:16,905 Okay. 1112 00:53:18,381 --> 00:53:20,249 If you and Regina are "best friends" now, 1113 00:53:20,284 --> 00:53:23,142 then you can be in charge of keeping all her secrets, okay? 1114 00:53:23,177 --> 00:53:26,178 For example, she gave you those high-heel shoes just to make fun of you 1115 00:53:26,213 --> 00:53:29,258 because she knew you wouldn't be able to walk in them. Sorry! 1116 00:53:29,293 --> 00:53:32,118 Also, she says she has a nose job, 1117 00:53:32,153 --> 00:53:33,691 but that's just to distract from the fact 1118 00:53:33,726 --> 00:53:36,188 that she had one of her ears moved! 1119 00:53:36,223 --> 00:53:38,894 Also, she totally cheats on Aaron. 1120 00:53:38,929 --> 00:53:41,864 Yeah. Every Tuesday, she says she has College Prep, 1121 00:53:41,899 --> 00:53:43,536 but really she's hooking up with Shane Oman 1122 00:53:43,571 --> 00:53:45,373 in the third-floor janitorial closet 1123 00:53:45,408 --> 00:53:48,200 on the bags of sawdust that they use for barf! 1124 00:53:48,235 --> 00:53:50,378 [over cell phone] And I never told anyone 1125 00:53:50,413 --> 00:53:52,578 because I'm such a good friend! 1126 00:53:52,613 --> 00:53:54,547 [exclaims] 1127 00:53:54,582 --> 00:53:57,418 And I'm only telling you because you're such a good friend. 1128 00:54:04,251 --> 00:54:06,119 [Janis] ♪ It's a revenge party ♪ 1129 00:54:06,154 --> 00:54:07,857 ♪ A party that ends ♪ 1130 00:54:07,892 --> 00:54:10,563 ♪ With somebody's head On a spike! ♪ 1131 00:54:10,598 --> 00:54:13,599 [Damian, Janis] ♪ A revenge party With your two best friends ♪ 1132 00:54:13,634 --> 00:54:17,306 ♪ It's like a party With revenge Is what it's like ♪ 1133 00:54:36,283 --> 00:54:38,360 ♪ A party with revenge Is what it's like ♪ 1134 00:54:39,561 --> 00:54:42,694 [Janis] ♪ A party with revenge ♪ 1135 00:54:42,729 --> 00:54:46,797 [Damian] ♪ With revenge ♪ 1136 00:54:46,832 --> 00:54:48,128 [Damian, Janis] ♪ Is what it's like! ♪ 1137 00:54:55,940 --> 00:54:57,511 [school bell rings] 1138 00:55:00,846 --> 00:55:03,748 Hey, do you have time to go over derivatives for a minute? 1139 00:55:04,487 --> 00:55:06,652 Oh, um... no, not today. 1140 00:55:09,316 --> 00:55:10,359 Cady? 1141 00:55:12,660 --> 00:55:14,495 Um... 1142 00:55:14,530 --> 00:55:16,827 You've failed your last five quizzes. Is everything okay? 1143 00:55:16,862 --> 00:55:19,467 I'm... I'm sorry. I'll just try harder. 1144 00:55:19,502 --> 00:55:21,260 Okay, because if you need extra help, 1145 00:55:21,295 --> 00:55:23,328 there's a Mathletes meeting starting in a couple minutes. 1146 00:55:23,363 --> 00:55:25,671 I can't. I'm sorry. I have to go to my friend Regina's house. 1147 00:55:25,706 --> 00:55:27,739 We're doing a dance in the talent show. 1148 00:55:27,774 --> 00:55:30,137 "Rockin' Around the Pole"? Yeah, how did you know? 1149 00:55:30,172 --> 00:55:32,106 They do it every year. It's like a... 1150 00:55:32,141 --> 00:55:33,844 Tradition? Recurring nightmare. 1151 00:55:35,045 --> 00:55:37,617 Okay, I could probably get Kevin to tutor you. 1152 00:55:37,652 --> 00:55:39,553 Well, Aaron's tutoring me now, so... 1153 00:55:39,588 --> 00:55:42,281 Oh, he's tutoring you? Sure, okay, well, 1154 00:55:42,316 --> 00:55:44,657 let Aaron know that the weird thing with your quizzes 1155 00:55:44,692 --> 00:55:47,858 is that all the work is right and only the answers are wrong. 1156 00:55:47,893 --> 00:55:50,256 Huh. Huh. 1157 00:55:50,291 --> 00:55:53,226 Cady, I am not gonna stop pushing you, because I'm a pusher. 1158 00:55:53,261 --> 00:55:55,470 And I know you're smarter than this. 1159 00:55:55,505 --> 00:55:59,837 Maybe I should just push your seat away from Aaron's. 1160 00:55:59,872 --> 00:56:02,807 Ugh! And she was like, "I'm a pusher, Cady. I'm a pusher." 1161 00:56:02,842 --> 00:56:05,172 Wait, what does she even mean, she's a "pusher"? 1162 00:56:05,207 --> 00:56:09,649 Like a drug pusher? I don't know. She's so weird. 1163 00:56:09,684 --> 00:56:12,454 Let it all out, honey. Put it in the book. 1164 00:56:15,184 --> 00:56:17,349 [shouts] Look at this thing! 1165 00:56:18,858 --> 00:56:21,958 I can't even see it. It's sexy, like a face breast. 1166 00:56:21,993 --> 00:56:25,533 It happens to me, too. It's just the Kälteen bars flushing your toxins. 1167 00:56:25,568 --> 00:56:27,029 Huh. Okay. 1168 00:56:27,064 --> 00:56:29,097 Well, this skin stuff you gave me sucks! 1169 00:56:29,737 --> 00:56:31,066 Where did you get it? 1170 00:56:32,608 --> 00:56:34,102 [Damian chuckling] 1171 00:56:38,779 --> 00:56:39,778 [dings] 1172 00:56:40,517 --> 00:56:41,714 The Paris airport. 1173 00:56:41,749 --> 00:56:43,045 Oh, "the Paris airport." 1174 00:56:43,080 --> 00:56:44,915 Well, it's garbage. And so are you. 1175 00:56:47,755 --> 00:56:50,349 She's just grouchy because Aaron broke up with her. 1176 00:56:50,384 --> 00:56:51,889 He did? 1177 00:56:51,924 --> 00:56:53,462 Someone told him about Shane. 1178 00:56:54,355 --> 00:56:56,025 Do you think it was Santa? 1179 00:56:57,127 --> 00:56:59,094 Oh... 1180 00:56:59,129 --> 00:57:01,899 Also, all that she's been eating are those Kälteen bars, 1181 00:57:01,934 --> 00:57:04,033 and I don't think she's pooped in, like, two weeks. 1182 00:57:04,068 --> 00:57:05,672 Uh... 1183 00:57:05,707 --> 00:57:07,542 Hey, G, we've practiced a bunch with Cady. 1184 00:57:07,577 --> 00:57:08,741 You want to run it once? 1185 00:57:08,776 --> 00:57:10,875 Why? I'm perfect every year. 1186 00:57:10,910 --> 00:57:12,338 Mm-hmm. 1187 00:57:12,373 --> 00:57:14,549 Yeah, but it's, uh, Cady's first time 1188 00:57:14,584 --> 00:57:16,551 and there's a bunch of traffic patterns... 1189 00:57:16,586 --> 00:57:19,411 Stop playing with that stupid babyish book! 1190 00:57:19,446 --> 00:57:20,555 [yelps] 1191 00:57:22,086 --> 00:57:23,624 [button clicks] 1192 00:57:23,659 --> 00:57:24,757 [inhales deeply] [piano music plays] 1193 00:57:24,792 --> 00:57:26,385 [singing in French] 1194 00:58:04,359 --> 00:58:06,568 [mic feedback] Uh, that was Damian Hubbard singing... 1195 00:58:06,603 --> 00:58:09,065 [Janis cheering] ...the iCarly theme song 1196 00:58:09,100 --> 00:58:10,704 in French for extra credit. 1197 00:58:10,739 --> 00:58:11,804 Yeah! 1198 00:58:13,434 --> 00:58:15,874 Our next act describes their music 1199 00:58:15,909 --> 00:58:19,273 as "Like a sine wave, they don't stop." 1200 00:58:19,308 --> 00:58:22,716 Please welcome Kevin G and the Power of Three. 1201 00:58:22,751 --> 00:58:24,949 [applause] [Kevin G] Uh. Yeah. 1202 00:58:24,984 --> 00:58:27,215 ♪ All you ♪ 1203 00:58:27,250 --> 00:58:29,382 ♪ Suckah emcees Ain't got nothin' on me ♪ 1204 00:58:29,417 --> 00:58:31,692 ♪ From my grades to my rhymes You can't touch Kevin G ♪ 1205 00:58:31,727 --> 00:58:32,957 ♪ I'm a Mathlete ♪ 1206 00:58:32,992 --> 00:58:34,926 ♪ So good under pressure ♪ 1207 00:58:34,961 --> 00:58:36,763 ♪ I'ma find acute angles To prioritize your pleasure ♪ 1208 00:58:36,798 --> 00:58:39,128 ♪ I'm a Model UN rep Out in these streets ♪ 1209 00:58:39,163 --> 00:58:41,361 ♪ But I'm a overachiever Under the sheets ♪ 1210 00:58:41,396 --> 00:58:44,001 ♪ She be like "Uhhhh, Kevin G!" ♪ 1211 00:58:44,036 --> 00:58:45,497 [principal] Inappropriate. 1212 00:58:45,532 --> 00:58:47,004 Kevin, we talked about this. 1213 00:58:47,039 --> 00:58:49,501 Well, happy holidays, everybody. 1214 00:58:49,536 --> 00:58:51,679 [audience applauds, cheers] 1215 00:58:51,714 --> 00:58:54,209 [groans] Why is this so tight? 1216 00:58:54,244 --> 00:58:55,980 You've had it since the sixth grade. 1217 00:58:56,015 --> 00:58:58,015 You're probably maturing. 1218 00:58:58,050 --> 00:59:00,853 [Gretchen] Um, do you just, like, want to run it one time real quick? 1219 00:59:00,888 --> 00:59:04,186 Gretchen, literally no one cares. 1220 00:59:04,221 --> 00:59:06,320 Mm-hmm. No, totally. 1221 00:59:06,355 --> 00:59:08,553 Um, do you just want to run the acro? 1222 00:59:08,588 --> 00:59:10,731 Because none of us really does gymnastics anymore 1223 00:59:10,766 --> 00:59:12,964 and when we made up this dance, we all weighed, like, 70 pounds, 1224 00:59:12,999 --> 00:59:16,165 so maybe we should just make sure everyone's center of gravity is still... 1225 00:59:16,200 --> 00:59:17,331 Still what? 1226 00:59:18,565 --> 00:59:19,608 Nothing. 1227 00:59:19,643 --> 00:59:20,675 [muffled music playing] 1228 00:59:24,945 --> 00:59:26,912 [music ends] [audience applauding] 1229 00:59:26,947 --> 00:59:30,685 [principal] Thank you, Shelby and Timmy, for tapping. 1230 00:59:30,720 --> 00:59:32,687 Also, if anyone finds a retainer 1231 00:59:32,722 --> 00:59:35,987 in a bright aqua case, that is mine. 1232 00:59:36,022 --> 00:59:37,483 Please return it. 1233 00:59:37,518 --> 00:59:39,595 My insurance won't cover a replacement. 1234 00:59:40,895 --> 00:59:42,730 Karen, I can see your bra. 1235 00:59:42,765 --> 00:59:44,633 It's on purpose. I'm going for a look. 1236 00:59:44,668 --> 00:59:46,492 [chuckles] Is it "girl who slept with 11 people"? 1237 00:59:46,527 --> 00:59:47,702 'Cause you're nailing it. 1238 00:59:49,563 --> 00:59:52,531 I think your top is fetch. Gretchen! 1239 00:59:52,566 --> 00:59:54,566 Stop trying to make "fetch" happen. 1240 00:59:54,601 --> 00:59:57,437 It's not going to happen. 1241 01:00:01,146 --> 01:00:03,883 [principal] Okay, please welcome Santa's Helpers 1242 01:00:03,918 --> 01:00:05,852 doing "Rockin' Around the Pole." 1243 01:00:05,887 --> 01:00:07,084 [audience applauding] 1244 01:00:07,119 --> 01:00:09,053 [festive music playing over speakers] 1245 01:00:15,798 --> 01:00:18,194 ♪ We're gonna Take a Christmas train ♪ 1246 01:00:18,229 --> 01:00:20,262 ♪ To where Santa lives ♪ 1247 01:00:20,297 --> 01:00:23,331 ♪ Up through the sleet And snow ♪ 1248 01:00:23,366 --> 01:00:26,741 ♪ Then we'll hop and bop Straight to the top ♪ 1249 01:00:26,776 --> 01:00:29,436 ♪ Last stop the North Pole ♪ 1250 01:00:31,440 --> 01:00:34,980 ♪ And we'll be rock, rock Rockin' around the pole ♪ 1251 01:00:35,015 --> 01:00:37,983 ♪ Where the northern lights Are bright ♪ 1252 01:00:38,018 --> 01:00:41,690 ♪ Rock, rock, rockin' Around the pole ♪ 1253 01:00:41,725 --> 01:00:44,825 ♪ We'll rock that pole All night ♪ 1254 01:00:44,860 --> 01:00:48,026 ♪ And we'll be sing, sing Singin' a Christmas tune ♪ 1255 01:00:48,061 --> 01:00:49,588 Thank you, next! 1256 01:00:51,295 --> 01:00:55,033 ♪ Yeah, we'll be rock Rock, rockin' up on that pole ♪ 1257 01:00:55,068 --> 01:00:58,003 ♪ Rockin' till the break Of day ♪ 1258 01:00:58,038 --> 01:01:01,039 ♪ Yeah, we'll be rockin' Stuffin' a stockin' ♪ 1259 01:01:01,074 --> 01:01:04,207 ♪ And they'll be talkin' About us in town ♪ 1260 01:01:04,242 --> 01:01:06,473 ♪ Yeah, we'll be rockin' ♪ [audience gasps] 1261 01:01:06,508 --> 01:01:08,343 ♪ And rollin' and lockin' And strollin' ♪ [laughing] 1262 01:01:08,378 --> 01:01:11,984 ♪ Till the North Pole police Come shut us down ♪ 1263 01:01:12,019 --> 01:01:14,052 [music slows down] 1264 01:01:21,831 --> 01:01:24,194 [audience distorted laughter] 1265 01:01:31,401 --> 01:01:33,698 [music stops] 1266 01:01:33,733 --> 01:01:36,844 So, I went to the Christmas show and it was a mess, y'all. 1267 01:01:36,879 --> 01:01:38,670 Regina ate total shit. 1268 01:01:38,705 --> 01:01:40,375 I think people saw her nipple. 1269 01:01:40,410 --> 01:01:41,706 It's just unprofessional. 1270 01:01:41,741 --> 01:01:43,312 This was kind of hilarious. 1271 01:01:43,347 --> 01:01:45,479 [thudding] [audience gasping] 1272 01:01:45,514 --> 01:01:47,151 [laughs] [vlogger 1] I've watched 1273 01:01:47,186 --> 01:01:50,550 this video a thousand times. Gretchen piledrived Regina. 1274 01:01:50,585 --> 01:01:52,222 Regina really should be lifting through her glutes. 1275 01:01:52,257 --> 01:01:54,290 Regina challenge! 1276 01:01:54,325 --> 01:01:55,896 [vlogger 2] You know what that bitch gets? 1277 01:01:55,931 --> 01:01:57,293 Not my sympathy. 1278 01:01:57,328 --> 01:01:58,723 It's not like we like Regina anyway. 1279 01:01:58,758 --> 01:02:00,626 She's such a bitch. She's so spoiled. 1280 01:02:00,661 --> 01:02:02,870 [vlogger 3] Regina always wanted to be the center of attention. 1281 01:02:02,905 --> 01:02:05,070 [vlogger 4] Girl, we all see you. 1282 01:02:05,105 --> 01:02:07,138 Regina got what she deserves. 1283 01:02:07,173 --> 01:02:08,975 But you know, that Cady girl was kind of cute. 1284 01:02:09,010 --> 01:02:10,042 You know, she stayed, she waved. 1285 01:02:10,077 --> 01:02:12,407 She ate, like, house down. 1286 01:02:12,442 --> 01:02:14,277 Cady Heron was the only one that acted normal. 1287 01:02:14,312 --> 01:02:15,850 [vlogger 5] Oh, yeah. [vlogger 6] I think she salvaged 1288 01:02:15,885 --> 01:02:17,544 the worst tradition of the year. 1289 01:02:17,579 --> 01:02:19,513 [vlogger 7] Period. She was... She's kind of hot. 1290 01:02:19,548 --> 01:02:21,515 She might even be hotter than Regina George. 1291 01:02:21,550 --> 01:02:24,386 No zits. Gum health. American Eagle. 1292 01:02:24,421 --> 01:02:26,025 Cady doesn't even have to wear deodorant. 1293 01:02:26,060 --> 01:02:27,587 I'm thinking of going red. 1294 01:02:27,622 --> 01:02:29,061 Okay, so, somebody sent me this look, and I was like, 1295 01:02:29,096 --> 01:02:31,030 "Hot girls, we are going back to red! 1296 01:02:31,065 --> 01:02:32,834 Y2K fire-crotch is back!" 1297 01:02:32,869 --> 01:02:34,660 Thank you, Cady Heron. 1298 01:02:34,695 --> 01:02:36,332 [vlogger 6] Cady was looking good. 1299 01:02:37,841 --> 01:02:39,137 [Janis] Caddy! 1300 01:02:40,107 --> 01:02:41,766 Did you hear me? 1301 01:02:41,801 --> 01:02:44,340 What? We did it. 1302 01:02:44,375 --> 01:02:45,770 Regina lost her hot boyfriend. 1303 01:02:45,805 --> 01:02:47,244 She lost her status over everyone. 1304 01:02:47,279 --> 01:02:48,883 She popped her blemish against the stage floor. 1305 01:02:48,918 --> 01:02:50,214 That's rock bottom. [chuckles] 1306 01:02:51,118 --> 01:02:53,250 We can stop. We're even. 1307 01:02:53,285 --> 01:02:55,120 Finally you don't have to talk to them anymore. 1308 01:02:55,155 --> 01:02:57,419 [Damian] We can finally have lunch together tomorrow. 1309 01:02:57,454 --> 01:02:58,992 I'm getting dumplings. 1310 01:02:59,027 --> 01:03:00,829 Unless they have pizza bagels, then I might get both. 1311 01:03:00,864 --> 01:03:02,457 [Janis] So good. I can't. 1312 01:03:04,692 --> 01:03:06,593 I need one more lunch. 1313 01:03:12,535 --> 01:03:14,601 [students chattering] 1314 01:03:30,322 --> 01:03:33,026 I'm sorry, Regina. You can't sit with us. 1315 01:03:35,294 --> 01:03:36,788 What? 1316 01:03:38,033 --> 01:03:40,660 You're wearing sweatpants. It's Thursday. 1317 01:03:41,696 --> 01:03:43,465 Whatever. Those rules aren't real. 1318 01:03:43,500 --> 01:03:45,005 They were real that day I wore a vest. 1319 01:03:45,040 --> 01:03:46,633 Yeah, because that vest was disgusting! 1320 01:03:46,668 --> 01:03:49,075 You can't sit with us! 1321 01:03:49,110 --> 01:03:50,703 [students stop talking] 1322 01:04:01,881 --> 01:04:04,255 These sweatpants are all that fit me right now. 1323 01:04:07,722 --> 01:04:08,963 What do you think, Cady? 1324 01:04:16,005 --> 01:04:19,732 Sorry, Regina. Rules are rules. 1325 01:04:21,802 --> 01:04:22,834 Fine. 1326 01:04:25,212 --> 01:04:28,081 [student] Oh. [laughs mockingly] 1327 01:04:30,415 --> 01:04:32,382 Take a picture, losers. It'll last longer. 1328 01:04:41,030 --> 01:04:42,755 And that... ...was the beginning... 1329 01:04:42,790 --> 01:04:43,690 ...of the... ...mother******á 1330 01:04:43,725 --> 01:04:45,230 [trilling] ...end. 1331 01:04:48,862 --> 01:04:50,400 Hello, may I have your attention 1332 01:04:50,435 --> 01:04:51,907 for this morning's announcements? 1333 01:04:53,405 --> 01:04:55,108 In honor of Women's History Month, 1334 01:04:55,143 --> 01:04:58,705 the cafeteria is offering vegan "Confident Joannes" 1335 01:04:58,740 --> 01:05:01,213 which are Sloppy Joes made of beans. 1336 01:05:03,415 --> 01:05:05,250 Secondly, we want to wish good luck 1337 01:05:05,285 --> 01:05:07,648 to junior, Janis 'Imi'ike... [student snoring] 1338 01:05:07,683 --> 01:05:09,089 ...who is a finalist 1339 01:05:09,124 --> 01:05:11,652 in the Illinois Art Expo this Saturday. 1340 01:05:11,687 --> 01:05:14,160 Go, Lions! Even for Art. 1341 01:05:14,195 --> 01:05:15,920 Art, art, art! [Mr. Duvall] Next up, 1342 01:05:15,955 --> 01:05:18,362 the Students Activities Committee voted, 1343 01:05:18,397 --> 01:05:20,133 and the theme for this year's Spring Fling... 1344 01:05:20,168 --> 01:05:22,663 What's that lip color? Oh, it's e.l.f. O Face in... 1345 01:05:22,698 --> 01:05:24,104 No, amazing, yeah. 1346 01:05:24,139 --> 01:05:25,831 I was just making sure your ears still worked. 1347 01:05:25,866 --> 01:05:30,473 And finally, the nominees for Spring Fling King and Queen 1348 01:05:30,508 --> 01:05:31,903 are as follows: 1349 01:05:31,938 --> 01:05:34,048 For King, Aaron Samuels, 1350 01:05:34,083 --> 01:05:37,051 Christian Wiggins and Shane Oman. 1351 01:05:37,086 --> 01:05:39,086 And Damian Hubbard. What? 1352 01:05:40,122 --> 01:05:41,550 For Queen... 1353 01:05:41,585 --> 01:05:43,024 ...Regina George... 1354 01:05:43,059 --> 01:05:45,587 ...Karen Shetty and Gretchen Wieners. 1355 01:05:45,622 --> 01:05:47,820 Same old, same old. [Mr. Duvall] And Caddy Heron. 1356 01:05:47,855 --> 01:05:49,459 [gasps] 1357 01:05:50,792 --> 01:05:52,099 Wow. 1358 01:05:52,134 --> 01:05:53,034 Wait, my mistake. 1359 01:05:55,665 --> 01:05:57,005 Cady Heron. 1360 01:05:57,931 --> 01:05:58,974 [chuckles] 1361 01:06:01,275 --> 01:06:02,736 Oh, my God. 1362 01:06:02,771 --> 01:06:06,146 Oh, my God, so many people are texting me. 1363 01:06:06,181 --> 01:06:08,775 Should I, um, text Aaron and congratulate him? 1364 01:06:08,810 --> 01:06:10,084 [Damian, Janis] No. 1365 01:06:10,119 --> 01:06:11,910 Hey, do you want a lift this weekend? 1366 01:06:11,945 --> 01:06:13,978 'Cause Damian's borrowing his grandma's Jazzy. 1367 01:06:14,013 --> 01:06:15,518 A lift to what? 1368 01:06:17,060 --> 01:06:19,621 My art show. Didn't you just hear Mr. Duvall talking about it? 1369 01:06:19,656 --> 01:06:22,459 Oh, that's this weekend? Yeah. 1370 01:06:22,494 --> 01:06:26,397 Oh, shoot. I have tickets to this thing in Madison with my mom. 1371 01:06:26,432 --> 01:06:27,629 Uh, I'm sorry. 1372 01:06:29,666 --> 01:06:32,436 Yeah, you seem super sad about it. 1373 01:06:32,471 --> 01:06:35,043 [camera shutter clicking] 1374 01:06:35,078 --> 01:06:37,342 So, what are we doing this weekend? 1375 01:06:37,377 --> 01:06:39,146 Why is everyone asking me about the weekend? 1376 01:06:39,181 --> 01:06:40,609 It's Tuesday. 1377 01:06:40,644 --> 01:06:44,184 Yeah, the weekend is only... several days away. 1378 01:06:44,219 --> 01:06:46,549 I have to go to this thing in Madison with my mom. 1379 01:06:46,584 --> 01:06:48,353 Your mom is going away? You should have people over. 1380 01:06:48,388 --> 01:06:50,124 No, I'm going with her. 1381 01:06:50,159 --> 01:06:53,160 Well, if you have people over, you can invite Aaron. 1382 01:06:56,528 --> 01:06:58,099 Huh. 1383 01:06:58,134 --> 01:06:59,793 Yeah, I guess I could get out of it. 1384 01:06:59,828 --> 01:07:01,960 [both chuckle] But, like, 1385 01:07:01,995 --> 01:07:05,337 we would keep it small, right? Like five or six people? 1386 01:07:05,372 --> 01:07:06,800 Yes! Sure! 1387 01:07:06,835 --> 01:07:09,407 Why are you doing this to me?! 1388 01:07:09,442 --> 01:07:12,344 I promised my friend Janis I'd go to her art show! 1389 01:07:12,379 --> 01:07:14,709 But, binti, we've had these tickets for months. 1390 01:07:14,744 --> 01:07:16,216 You love Neil deGrasse Tyson. 1391 01:07:16,251 --> 01:07:17,349 Mom! 1392 01:07:17,384 --> 01:07:19,780 Janis is my best friend! 1393 01:07:19,815 --> 01:07:21,584 Do you not want me to be a good friend?! 1394 01:07:21,619 --> 01:07:23,047 No! Yes! What? 1395 01:07:23,082 --> 01:07:27,194 You can, uh, stay home on your own, I guess. 1396 01:07:27,229 --> 01:07:29,526 Hey. I'm having a small get-together 1397 01:07:29,561 --> 01:07:32,661 at my house tomorrow night. My mom's away, so... 1398 01:07:32,696 --> 01:07:33,992 Is Regina going? 1399 01:07:34,027 --> 01:07:36,632 No! Do you think I'm an idiot? No. 1400 01:07:36,667 --> 01:07:38,667 It's just gonna be a few cool people, 1401 01:07:38,702 --> 01:07:40,405 and you better be one of them, byotch. 1402 01:07:41,573 --> 01:07:43,441 Okay. I'll be there. 1403 01:07:46,743 --> 01:07:49,040 [upbeat music playing over speakers] 1404 01:07:51,550 --> 01:07:53,814 [camera shutter clicking] 1405 01:08:01,560 --> 01:08:02,955 No, no, no! 1406 01:08:02,990 --> 01:08:04,957 [grunts] [vase shatters] 1407 01:08:06,532 --> 01:08:07,993 [cheering] 1408 01:08:14,507 --> 01:08:16,342 Have you seen Aaron? 1409 01:08:16,377 --> 01:08:18,102 [Gretchen] What? Aaron! 1410 01:08:18,137 --> 01:08:19,642 Karen? 1411 01:08:20,876 --> 01:08:21,908 Hi. 1412 01:08:26,288 --> 01:08:28,255 Whoo! [coughing] 1413 01:08:30,457 --> 01:08:32,292 [muffled upbeat music playing over speakers] 1414 01:08:32,327 --> 01:08:33,656 [chuckles softly] 1415 01:08:34,263 --> 01:08:35,526 [Cady gasps] 1416 01:08:35,561 --> 01:08:37,055 I've been looking for you. 1417 01:08:37,893 --> 01:08:39,497 Me as well. 1418 01:08:39,532 --> 01:08:42,335 I like your costume. I mean, um, your dress. 1419 01:08:43,734 --> 01:08:45,602 Is this you holding a crocodile? 1420 01:08:45,637 --> 01:08:48,473 Oh, my God, don't look at that. That is so embarrassing. 1421 01:08:48,508 --> 01:08:50,838 No, it's not. It's awesome. 1422 01:08:51,808 --> 01:08:53,104 You miss Kenya? 1423 01:08:53,139 --> 01:08:54,413 Yes. 1424 01:08:54,448 --> 01:08:56,008 No. I mean, I... 1425 01:08:57,110 --> 01:08:58,978 Well, I miss... 1426 01:08:59,013 --> 01:09:01,420 I could see a lot more sky there. 1427 01:09:01,455 --> 01:09:02,817 At night. 1428 01:09:02,852 --> 01:09:05,853 My mom and I used to map the constellations. 1429 01:09:06,658 --> 01:09:08,020 The stars. 1430 01:09:09,826 --> 01:09:11,628 [treadmill humming] 1431 01:09:16,998 --> 01:09:18,800 You still on the treadmill, honey? 1432 01:09:18,835 --> 01:09:20,472 No, I'm over there. 1433 01:09:21,838 --> 01:09:25,213 You got any plans tonight? It's Saturday. 1434 01:09:25,248 --> 01:09:27,677 Mom, don't bother me. 1435 01:09:27,712 --> 01:09:30,944 I know you're not feeling your best about your body right now, 1436 01:09:30,979 --> 01:09:35,080 but remember that real beauty comes from the face. 1437 01:09:35,115 --> 01:09:38,721 Don't ever talk about my body! 1438 01:09:38,756 --> 01:09:40,723 Okay, okay. 1439 01:09:44,366 --> 01:09:47,895 Wait, honey, why are you eating Kälteen bars? 1440 01:09:47,930 --> 01:09:50,271 These are what we gave Nana Joan 1441 01:09:50,306 --> 01:09:51,932 when we needed her to gain weight. 1442 01:09:56,235 --> 01:09:57,839 [breathing heavily] 1443 01:10:08,181 --> 01:10:10,148 [screaming] 1444 01:10:15,760 --> 01:10:17,694 I am drinking 1445 01:10:17,729 --> 01:10:19,762 not juice tonight. [chuckles] 1446 01:10:19,797 --> 01:10:21,632 I know. I can tell. 1447 01:10:22,569 --> 01:10:23,832 We should go downstairs. 1448 01:10:23,867 --> 01:10:26,406 No, no, no, sit down. I'm amazing. 1449 01:10:26,441 --> 01:10:27,473 [chuckles] 1450 01:10:32,909 --> 01:10:36,240 I think you should wear your hair however you want. 1451 01:10:36,275 --> 01:10:38,913 I think it looks good both ways. 1452 01:10:40,752 --> 01:10:42,686 [chuckles] 1453 01:10:42,721 --> 01:10:45,656 Thank you for inviting me tonight. 1454 01:10:45,691 --> 01:10:48,527 I think I've spent too much time being pissed at Regina. 1455 01:10:48,562 --> 01:10:50,089 Yeah, you really have. 1456 01:10:50,124 --> 01:10:53,092 No more liars. I would never lie to you. 1457 01:10:54,700 --> 01:10:57,030 I mean, I did lie to you once. 1458 01:10:57,065 --> 01:10:59,571 But you are totally gonna laugh when I tell you. 1459 01:10:59,606 --> 01:11:01,001 Tell me what? [door opens] 1460 01:11:01,036 --> 01:11:02,904 [laughing] We're in here! 1461 01:11:03,808 --> 01:11:05,379 [laughs] 1462 01:11:05,414 --> 01:11:06,611 [chuckles] 1463 01:11:08,208 --> 01:11:11,275 I pretended to be bad at math 1464 01:11:11,310 --> 01:11:13,915 to get you to help me, but I'm not bad at math. 1465 01:11:13,950 --> 01:11:16,588 I'm actually... I'm actually really good at math. 1466 01:11:16,623 --> 01:11:20,493 You're the one who's only kind of okay at math. 1467 01:11:20,528 --> 01:11:22,792 Anyways, um, now I'm failing. 1468 01:11:22,827 --> 01:11:26,796 So isn't that so dumb? That is dumb, yeah. 1469 01:11:27,931 --> 01:11:29,469 Why wouldn't you just talk to me? 1470 01:11:29,504 --> 01:11:31,438 Because of Regina. 'Cause you were her property. 1471 01:11:31,473 --> 01:11:33,473 Her property? Shut up. Not her property. 1472 01:11:33,508 --> 01:11:34,771 Don't tell me to shut up. 1473 01:11:36,445 --> 01:11:38,808 [Cady] What? Aaron, sit down. 1474 01:11:38,843 --> 01:11:40,612 You are a clone of Regina. 1475 01:11:40,647 --> 01:11:42,515 [upbeat music playing over speakers] 1476 01:11:43,419 --> 01:11:45,045 No. No, no, no! 1477 01:11:45,080 --> 01:11:47,520 What are you thinking about? 1478 01:11:47,555 --> 01:11:48,785 Chicken wings later. 1479 01:11:48,820 --> 01:11:50,248 Do you ever think about me? 1480 01:11:50,283 --> 01:11:53,020 Sometimes. When I'm looking right at you. 1481 01:12:01,503 --> 01:12:03,338 Cady, Cady, Cady! No, no, no. 1482 01:12:07,509 --> 01:12:09,003 Aaron! [panting] 1483 01:12:09,038 --> 01:12:11,511 Aaron, wait! [yelps] 1484 01:12:11,546 --> 01:12:13,106 [teenagers laughing] 1485 01:12:17,948 --> 01:12:19,783 You dirty little liar. 1486 01:12:20,786 --> 01:12:22,280 I... I can explain. 1487 01:12:22,315 --> 01:12:24,051 Explain how you're supposed to be out of town 1488 01:12:24,086 --> 01:12:25,492 but there are 60 different people 1489 01:12:25,527 --> 01:12:27,285 posting pictures from your party? 1490 01:12:27,320 --> 01:12:28,759 You know I couldn't invite you. 1491 01:12:28,794 --> 01:12:30,662 I... I have to act like I don't know you. 1492 01:12:30,697 --> 01:12:32,763 You are full of lies! 1493 01:12:32,798 --> 01:12:34,633 Janis, I cannot stop this Jazzy. 1494 01:12:34,668 --> 01:12:35,865 You know I have a curfew! 1495 01:12:35,900 --> 01:12:37,834 You would hate this party. 1496 01:12:37,869 --> 01:12:39,539 [in high-pitched voice] Why? Aren't you having an amazing time 1497 01:12:39,574 --> 01:12:41,035 with your amazing friends? 1498 01:12:41,070 --> 01:12:43,004 Janis, I can't spend every minute with you. 1499 01:12:43,039 --> 01:12:45,072 It's not my fault you're like obsessed with me or something! 1500 01:12:45,107 --> 01:12:46,238 [brakes screech] 1501 01:12:48,143 --> 01:12:51,716 What? Oh, no, she didn't. 1502 01:12:51,751 --> 01:12:54,147 See, this is the problem with you Plastics. 1503 01:12:54,182 --> 01:12:56,215 You think everyone is obsessed with you 1504 01:12:56,250 --> 01:12:58,052 when actually everybody hates you. 1505 01:12:58,087 --> 01:12:59,988 You made me like this. 1506 01:13:00,023 --> 01:13:02,221 It was your idea for me to pretend to be Plastic! 1507 01:13:02,256 --> 01:13:03,959 Buddy, it's not pretend! 1508 01:13:03,994 --> 01:13:05,697 ♪ You are as plastic As they come ♪ 1509 01:13:05,732 --> 01:13:07,325 ♪ You think Your shit don't stink ♪ 1510 01:13:07,360 --> 01:13:08,898 ♪ You think The rest of us are dumb ♪ 1511 01:13:08,933 --> 01:13:10,669 ♪ I hate Regina's guts ♪ 1512 01:13:10,704 --> 01:13:11,967 ♪ But here's what You don't comprehend ♪ 1513 01:13:12,002 --> 01:13:13,507 ♪ At least she has the guts ♪ 1514 01:13:13,542 --> 01:13:15,707 ♪ To not pretend To be my friend! ♪ 1515 01:13:17,073 --> 01:13:17,940 Here. 1516 01:13:18,910 --> 01:13:22,142 Have this. It won an award. Janis. 1517 01:13:22,177 --> 01:13:25,343 ♪ No, it's fine ♪ 1518 01:13:25,378 --> 01:13:28,412 ♪ Really fine ♪ 1519 01:13:28,447 --> 01:13:34,319 ♪ Go be fine! ♪ 1520 01:13:34,354 --> 01:13:35,529 [music stops] 1521 01:13:35,564 --> 01:13:37,498 And I want my pink shirt. 1522 01:13:37,533 --> 01:13:38,565 [horn honks] 1523 01:13:49,270 --> 01:13:50,709 [distant laughter from party] 1524 01:14:16,099 --> 01:14:20,475 ♪ My name is Regina George ♪ 1525 01:14:21,577 --> 01:14:26,844 ♪ And I am a massive deal ♪ 1526 01:14:26,879 --> 01:14:32,685 ♪ I will grind you to sand ♪ 1527 01:14:32,720 --> 01:14:37,954 ♪ Beneath my Louboutin-ed heel ♪ 1528 01:14:37,989 --> 01:14:42,728 ♪ This is what I get For helping ♪ 1529 01:14:42,763 --> 01:14:47,931 ♪ Helping someone lame fit in ♪ 1530 01:14:47,966 --> 01:14:50,428 ♪ Cady Heron ♪ 1531 01:14:50,463 --> 01:14:55,202 ♪ Enjoy your temporary win ♪ 1532 01:14:58,680 --> 01:15:02,715 ♪ My name is Regina George ♪ 1533 01:15:03,850 --> 01:15:09,249 ♪ "This girl is a fugly cow" ♪ 1534 01:15:09,284 --> 01:15:11,691 ♪ Hey, Cady ♪ 1535 01:15:11,726 --> 01:15:18,797 ♪ How you like me now? ♪ 1536 01:15:20,328 --> 01:15:22,702 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1537 01:15:22,737 --> 01:15:25,606 ♪ I brought the gasoline ♪ 1538 01:15:25,641 --> 01:15:27,641 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1539 01:15:27,676 --> 01:15:30,974 ♪ And everyone get mean ♪ 1540 01:15:31,009 --> 01:15:33,471 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1541 01:15:33,506 --> 01:15:35,682 ♪ I got the gasoline ♪ 1542 01:15:35,717 --> 01:15:38,212 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1543 01:15:38,247 --> 01:15:41,787 ♪ And everyone get ♪ 1544 01:15:41,822 --> 01:15:46,055 ♪ Mean ♪ 1545 01:16:02,502 --> 01:16:05,503 ♪ Cady, time to Watch your back ♪ 1546 01:16:05,538 --> 01:16:08,011 ♪ Cady, time to turn and cough ♪ 1547 01:16:08,046 --> 01:16:10,783 ♪ Because you took me down ♪ 1548 01:16:10,818 --> 01:16:15,722 ♪ But you didn't finish me off ♪ 1549 01:16:15,757 --> 01:16:17,251 [laughing] 1550 01:16:18,485 --> 01:16:21,090 ♪ My name is Regina George ♪ 1551 01:16:21,125 --> 01:16:23,697 ♪ And in case You're keeping score ♪ 1552 01:16:23,732 --> 01:16:26,062 ♪ Cady may have won the battle ♪ 1553 01:16:26,097 --> 01:16:28,801 ♪ But I will win the war ♪ 1554 01:16:28,836 --> 01:16:30,561 [crying] 1555 01:16:30,596 --> 01:16:33,839 I'm just so upset, Mr. Duvall. 1556 01:16:33,874 --> 01:16:35,368 We found it in the hallway. 1557 01:16:35,403 --> 01:16:37,876 I mean, the things it says about me? 1558 01:16:37,911 --> 01:16:39,405 The things it says about all of us? 1559 01:16:39,440 --> 01:16:41,242 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1560 01:16:41,277 --> 01:16:43,783 ♪ Trang Pham Is a grotsky byotch! ♪ 1561 01:16:43,818 --> 01:16:45,785 [laughing] 1562 01:16:45,820 --> 01:16:49,756 "Rachel Hamilton fills her inhaler with vodka"? 1563 01:16:49,791 --> 01:16:52,088 I mean... does that work? 1564 01:16:54,422 --> 01:16:55,828 [Regina] ♪ I got the gasoline ♪ 1565 01:16:55,863 --> 01:16:57,522 [chorus] ♪ Ms. Norbury's ♪ 1566 01:16:57,557 --> 01:16:58,963 ♪ A drug pusher! ♪ No, no, no. No! 1567 01:16:58,998 --> 01:17:02,098 "Ms. Norbury is a sad, old drug pusher"? 1568 01:17:03,805 --> 01:17:06,707 "Haley Fralenger has" ...what? 1569 01:17:06,742 --> 01:17:07,972 What's this? Hairy nips. 1570 01:17:08,007 --> 01:17:09,677 [laughing] 1571 01:17:09,712 --> 01:17:11,602 Good Lord. 1572 01:17:11,637 --> 01:17:14,638 [Regina] ♪ Mmm, I want To make the world burn ♪ 1573 01:17:14,673 --> 01:17:17,146 ♪ Janis is a pyro-lez! ♪ 1574 01:17:17,181 --> 01:17:19,544 Don't you worry. We're gonna find out who did this. 1575 01:17:19,579 --> 01:17:22,217 There's only three girls in the whole school who aren't in it. 1576 01:17:22,252 --> 01:17:24,956 [chorus] ♪ Regina is a fugly cow! ♪ 1577 01:17:24,991 --> 01:17:27,420 ♪ Regina is a fugly cow! ♪ 1578 01:17:27,455 --> 01:17:29,290 ♪ You wrote this ♪ 1579 01:17:29,325 --> 01:17:32,656 [Regina] ♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa! ♪ 1580 01:17:32,691 --> 01:17:35,164 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1581 01:17:35,199 --> 01:17:37,771 ♪ I got the gasoline ♪ 1582 01:17:37,806 --> 01:17:40,169 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1583 01:17:40,204 --> 01:17:43,139 ♪ And everyone turn ♪ 1584 01:17:43,174 --> 01:17:47,781 ♪ Mean... Mean ♪ 1585 01:17:47,816 --> 01:17:53,281 ♪ Mean! ♪ 1586 01:17:53,316 --> 01:17:55,481 "Damian Hubbard is too gay to function"? 1587 01:17:55,516 --> 01:17:57,087 That is only okay when I say it. 1588 01:17:57,122 --> 01:17:58,517 Only Cady could have written that. 1589 01:18:00,455 --> 01:18:01,894 [yelping] 1590 01:18:03,326 --> 01:18:08,593 [Regina] ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1591 01:18:08,628 --> 01:18:12,806 ♪ I want to make The world turn ♪ 1592 01:18:12,841 --> 01:18:18,207 ♪ So mean! ♪ 1593 01:18:18,242 --> 01:18:20,110 Oh, hell no! 1594 01:18:20,145 --> 01:18:24,048 I did not go to graduate school for this. 1595 01:18:24,083 --> 01:18:29,284 [fire alarm ringing] ♪ I want to watch The world burn! ♪ 1596 01:18:29,319 --> 01:18:34,960 All junior girls report to the gymnasium immediately! 1597 01:18:34,995 --> 01:18:36,588 Immediately! 1598 01:18:41,331 --> 01:18:43,364 [students whispering] 1599 01:18:49,174 --> 01:18:52,340 Never in my 31 years as an educator 1600 01:18:52,375 --> 01:18:54,177 have I seen such behavior. 1601 01:18:54,212 --> 01:18:57,279 I have half a mind to cancel your Spring Fling dance! 1602 01:18:57,314 --> 01:18:59,380 No! I object. 1603 01:18:59,415 --> 01:19:01,151 [students clamoring] 1604 01:19:01,186 --> 01:19:02,515 But we're not gonna do that 1605 01:19:02,550 --> 01:19:04,220 because we've already paid the DJ. 1606 01:19:04,255 --> 01:19:08,961 But I am taking this "Burn Book" seriously. 1607 01:19:08,996 --> 01:19:10,930 Now who has something to say about this? 1608 01:19:19,600 --> 01:19:20,907 Someone wrote in that book 1609 01:19:20,942 --> 01:19:22,172 that I'm lying about being a virgin 1610 01:19:22,207 --> 01:19:24,878 because I use super-jumbo tampons. 1611 01:19:24,913 --> 01:19:27,177 But I can't help it if I have a heavy flow 1612 01:19:27,212 --> 01:19:28,816 and a wideset vagina. 1613 01:19:28,851 --> 01:19:32,578 Okay. Thank you. Hold that thought. 1614 01:19:33,812 --> 01:19:36,252 Sharon, you need to run this. Oh, come on. 1615 01:19:36,287 --> 01:19:37,891 I need to be able to tell parents 1616 01:19:37,926 --> 01:19:40,124 that we fixed this, and honestly, 1617 01:19:40,159 --> 01:19:41,895 you need to prove whoever called you 1618 01:19:41,930 --> 01:19:45,129 a drug pusher was just joking. 1619 01:19:45,164 --> 01:19:47,032 Okay, fine, but you are walking the dogs 1620 01:19:47,067 --> 01:19:49,067 every morning for the rest of the week. 1621 01:19:49,102 --> 01:19:50,695 Thank you. I love you. 1622 01:19:50,730 --> 01:19:52,268 I love you, too. 1623 01:19:55,108 --> 01:19:56,140 [Ms. Norbury sighs] 1624 01:19:57,638 --> 01:19:59,011 [singing off-key] ♪ Well ♪ 1625 01:19:59,046 --> 01:20:00,672 [music stops] [clears throat] Excuse me. 1626 01:20:02,247 --> 01:20:05,952 Well, okay, hotshots, 1627 01:20:06,779 --> 01:20:08,284 who wrote all this junk? 1628 01:20:10,959 --> 01:20:11,925 Cady? 1629 01:20:12,851 --> 01:20:14,455 Any ideas? 1630 01:20:16,855 --> 01:20:17,821 No. 1631 01:20:17,856 --> 01:20:19,460 Interesting. 1632 01:20:19,495 --> 01:20:21,165 Um, can I just say, 1633 01:20:21,200 --> 01:20:23,299 I don't think we have a clique problem at this school? 1634 01:20:23,334 --> 01:20:25,598 And some of us shouldn't have to participate 1635 01:20:25,633 --> 01:20:27,567 in whatever this is, 1636 01:20:27,602 --> 01:20:29,536 um, just because of a few bad people. 1637 01:20:29,571 --> 01:20:31,912 "A few bad people." Mm-hmm. 1638 01:20:31,947 --> 01:20:35,839 [Ms. Norbury] Okay. Well, let's unpack that. 1639 01:20:35,874 --> 01:20:38,149 I want everybody to close your eyes. 1640 01:20:40,417 --> 01:20:41,812 And I want you to raise your hand 1641 01:20:41,847 --> 01:20:43,781 if you have ever had a girl say something bad 1642 01:20:43,816 --> 01:20:45,057 about you behind your back. 1643 01:20:47,028 --> 01:20:49,226 Open your eyes. 1644 01:20:52,330 --> 01:20:54,165 Now close them again. 1645 01:20:54,200 --> 01:20:56,563 This time I want you to raise your hand 1646 01:20:56,598 --> 01:20:58,598 if you have ever said something bad 1647 01:20:58,633 --> 01:21:00,336 about a friend behind her back. 1648 01:21:09,314 --> 01:21:10,808 Open your eyes. 1649 01:21:14,220 --> 01:21:15,483 Hmm. 1650 01:21:15,518 --> 01:21:17,221 Seems like maybe we could take a break 1651 01:21:17,256 --> 01:21:20,191 from being victims in this situation 1652 01:21:20,226 --> 01:21:22,028 and start taking responsibility 1653 01:21:22,063 --> 01:21:23,997 for our own actions. 1654 01:21:24,032 --> 01:21:26,395 Okay, we're gonna write out some apologies 1655 01:21:26,430 --> 01:21:28,661 to people that we've hurt in our lives. 1656 01:21:28,696 --> 01:21:30,069 Everybody up. 1657 01:21:32,766 --> 01:21:35,041 [softly] I'm gonna kill you. 1658 01:21:35,076 --> 01:21:37,901 'Cause one thing I know for sure, guys: 1659 01:21:37,936 --> 01:21:41,872 Calling someone "ugly" is not gonna make you better looking. 1660 01:21:41,907 --> 01:21:45,480 Calling somebody else "stupid" does not make you any smarter. 1661 01:21:45,515 --> 01:21:48,153 And we as women have to be able to trust 1662 01:21:48,188 --> 01:21:50,749 and support each other. 1663 01:21:50,784 --> 01:21:51,849 Like this. 1664 01:21:53,853 --> 01:21:55,556 [exhales] [students gasp] 1665 01:21:55,591 --> 01:21:57,228 Okay, that was good. That was really good. 1666 01:21:57,263 --> 01:21:59,560 That could have really backfired. 1667 01:21:59,595 --> 01:22:01,199 Alyssa, 1668 01:22:01,234 --> 01:22:03,003 I'm sorry I said you look like you comb your hair 1669 01:22:03,038 --> 01:22:04,070 with a chicken bone. 1670 01:22:05,898 --> 01:22:07,942 I know you're vegetarian. 1671 01:22:09,605 --> 01:22:11,539 [yelps] 1672 01:22:11,574 --> 01:22:14,608 Gretchen, I'm sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea 1673 01:22:14,643 --> 01:22:16,775 on the Ferris wheel. 1674 01:22:16,810 --> 01:22:18,909 And I'm sorry for repeating it now. 1675 01:22:18,944 --> 01:22:21,054 And I'm sorry to the people who were below us. 1676 01:22:21,089 --> 01:22:22,220 [students snicker] 1677 01:22:23,124 --> 01:22:24,189 [students gasp] 1678 01:22:24,224 --> 01:22:25,454 Soona, 1679 01:22:25,489 --> 01:22:27,258 I'm sorry I said you were dragging 1680 01:22:27,293 --> 01:22:29,392 during "Revenge Party." 1681 01:22:29,427 --> 01:22:31,229 There was just, like, so much pressure on us 1682 01:22:31,264 --> 01:22:33,066 to move the story forward through montage. 1683 01:22:33,101 --> 01:22:34,166 Like, you know how it is. 1684 01:22:34,201 --> 01:22:36,630 What is going on? 1685 01:22:36,665 --> 01:22:37,961 Don't worry about it. 1686 01:22:37,996 --> 01:22:40,073 I just wish we could all get along 1687 01:22:40,108 --> 01:22:42,273 like we used to in elementary school. 1688 01:22:42,308 --> 01:22:44,737 [cries] I wish I could bake a cake 1689 01:22:44,772 --> 01:22:48,114 made out of rainbows and smiles. 1690 01:22:48,149 --> 01:22:50,710 Then we could all eat it and be happy. 1691 01:22:50,745 --> 01:22:53,020 She don't even go here! 1692 01:22:54,254 --> 01:22:55,946 Do you go to this school? 1693 01:22:55,981 --> 01:22:58,619 I'm here for a track meet. 1694 01:22:58,654 --> 01:23:00,951 I just have a lot of feelings! [crying] 1695 01:23:00,986 --> 01:23:02,986 Okay, sweetheart, you got to go home. 1696 01:23:03,021 --> 01:23:05,131 Okay. [crying] 1697 01:23:05,166 --> 01:23:06,693 Come on, we're gonna... [student] Oh, thank you. 1698 01:23:06,728 --> 01:23:08,299 ...we're gonna call your grown-up. 1699 01:23:08,994 --> 01:23:10,565 [Janis] My turn, I guess. 1700 01:23:10,600 --> 01:23:12,534 Watch, this is either gonna be some really crappy art 1701 01:23:12,569 --> 01:23:13,964 or really good fire. 1702 01:23:13,999 --> 01:23:15,669 [students laughing] 1703 01:23:21,380 --> 01:23:23,215 Okay, sure. 1704 01:23:23,250 --> 01:23:25,052 I have an apology. 1705 01:23:26,484 --> 01:23:28,484 My friend and I thought it would be fun 1706 01:23:28,519 --> 01:23:31,355 to mess up Regina George's life. 1707 01:23:31,390 --> 01:23:33,621 So we got these candy-bar things 1708 01:23:33,656 --> 01:23:35,293 to make her gain weight... [students gasp] 1709 01:23:35,328 --> 01:23:38,131 ...and we told her lard was face cream. 1710 01:23:38,166 --> 01:23:39,495 [students laughing] 1711 01:23:39,530 --> 01:23:42,564 And we turned her best friends against her. 1712 01:23:43,567 --> 01:23:45,303 And then my friend Cady... 1713 01:23:45,338 --> 01:23:47,866 Yeah, you all know my friend Cady. 1714 01:23:47,901 --> 01:23:52,970 She got Regina's boyfriend to dump her! 1715 01:23:53,005 --> 01:23:54,675 [students] Oh! [Janis chuckles] 1716 01:23:54,710 --> 01:23:56,039 And it turns out, 1717 01:23:56,074 --> 01:23:57,909 Cady's actually just as selfish 1718 01:23:57,944 --> 01:24:00,615 and phony as Regina George. 1719 01:24:02,256 --> 01:24:04,289 So this apology is to myself. 1720 01:24:05,589 --> 01:24:07,391 Because I should've known better. 1721 01:24:09,054 --> 01:24:10,658 ♪ So your best friend Screwed you over ♪ 1722 01:24:10,693 --> 01:24:12,396 ♪ Acted nice when She's not nice ♪ 1723 01:24:12,431 --> 01:24:14,332 ♪ Well, I have some advice ♪ 1724 01:24:14,367 --> 01:24:16,301 ♪ 'Cause it's happened To me twice ♪ 1725 01:24:16,336 --> 01:24:19,568 ♪ Here's my secret strategy It always works because ♪ 1726 01:24:19,603 --> 01:24:22,505 ♪ The world doesn't end It just feels like it does ♪ 1727 01:24:22,540 --> 01:24:25,706 ♪ Just raise your right finger ♪ 1728 01:24:25,741 --> 01:24:30,040 ♪ And solemnly swear ♪ 1729 01:24:30,075 --> 01:24:33,252 ♪ Whatever they say about me ♪ 1730 01:24:33,287 --> 01:24:36,717 ♪ I don't care ♪ 1731 01:24:36,752 --> 01:24:38,653 ♪ I won't twist in knots To join your game ♪ 1732 01:24:38,688 --> 01:24:40,721 ♪ I will say "You make me mad" ♪ 1733 01:24:40,756 --> 01:24:43,691 ♪ And if you treat me bad I'll say, "You're bad" ♪ 1734 01:24:43,726 --> 01:24:45,627 ♪ If I eat alone From this moment on ♪ 1735 01:24:45,662 --> 01:24:47,563 ♪ That's just what I'll do ♪ 1736 01:24:47,598 --> 01:24:50,731 ♪ 'Cause I'd rather be me I'd rather be me ♪ 1737 01:24:50,766 --> 01:24:53,305 ♪ I'd rather be me ♪ 1738 01:24:53,340 --> 01:24:55,736 ♪ Than be with you ♪ 1739 01:25:01,315 --> 01:25:03,040 ♪ We're supposed To all be ladies ♪ 1740 01:25:03,075 --> 01:25:04,910 ♪ And be nurturing and care ♪ 1741 01:25:04,945 --> 01:25:06,549 ♪ Is that really fair? ♪ 1742 01:25:06,584 --> 01:25:08,353 ♪ Boys get to fight We have to share ♪ 1743 01:25:08,388 --> 01:25:09,552 ♪ Here's the way that That turns out ♪ 1744 01:25:09,587 --> 01:25:11,686 ♪ We always understand ♪ 1745 01:25:11,721 --> 01:25:14,689 ♪ How to slap someone down With our underhand ♪ 1746 01:25:14,724 --> 01:25:18,462 ♪ So here is my right finger ♪ 1747 01:25:18,497 --> 01:25:22,026 ♪ To how girls should behave ♪ 1748 01:25:22,061 --> 01:25:25,601 ♪ 'Cause sometimes What's meant to break you ♪ 1749 01:25:25,636 --> 01:25:28,967 ♪ Makes you brave ♪ 1750 01:25:29,002 --> 01:25:32,278 ♪ So I will not act all innocent I won't fake apologize ♪ 1751 01:25:32,313 --> 01:25:34,071 ♪ Let's just fight And then make up ♪ 1752 01:25:34,106 --> 01:25:35,974 ♪ Not tell these lies ♪ 1753 01:25:36,009 --> 01:25:37,745 ♪ Let's call our damage even ♪ 1754 01:25:37,780 --> 01:25:39,780 ♪ Clean the slate Till it's like new ♪ 1755 01:25:39,815 --> 01:25:43,047 ♪ It's a new life for me Where I'd rather be me ♪ 1756 01:25:43,082 --> 01:25:45,522 ♪ I'd rather be me ♪ 1757 01:25:45,557 --> 01:25:47,722 ♪ Than be with you ♪ 1758 01:25:49,561 --> 01:25:51,363 ♪ I'll say, "No" ♪ ♪ No! ♪ 1759 01:25:51,398 --> 01:25:52,925 ♪ I'll say, "Knock it off With your notes ♪ 1760 01:25:52,960 --> 01:25:55,268 ♪ And your rules And your games" ♪ 1761 01:25:55,303 --> 01:25:57,160 ♪ And those sycophants Who follow you I'll remember all their names ♪ 1762 01:25:57,195 --> 01:26:00,471 ♪ And when they drag you down Like they inevitably do ♪ 1763 01:26:00,506 --> 01:26:02,275 ♪ I will not laugh along With them ♪ 1764 01:26:02,310 --> 01:26:03,639 ♪ And approve Their palace coup ♪ 1765 01:26:03,674 --> 01:26:05,311 ♪ 'Cause that's not me ♪ 1766 01:26:07,480 --> 01:26:09,073 ♪ I don't need Their good opinions ♪ 1767 01:26:09,108 --> 01:26:11,218 ♪ I've got plenty of opinions ♪ 1768 01:26:11,253 --> 01:26:14,452 ♪ Every asshole has opinions But it doesn't make 'em true ♪ 1769 01:26:14,487 --> 01:26:17,884 ♪ What's true is being me And I'd rather be me ♪ 1770 01:26:17,919 --> 01:26:20,425 ♪ I'd rather be me ♪ 1771 01:26:20,460 --> 01:26:22,823 ♪ Than be with you ♪ [camera shutter clicks] 1772 01:26:24,464 --> 01:26:28,191 ♪ So raise 'em high 'Cause playing nice and shy ♪ 1773 01:26:28,226 --> 01:26:32,668 ♪ Is insulting my IQ ♪ 1774 01:26:32,703 --> 01:26:36,133 ♪ I'd rather be me I'd rather be me ♪ 1775 01:26:36,168 --> 01:26:39,543 ♪ I'd rather be me Than be with you ♪ 1776 01:26:39,578 --> 01:26:41,248 Walk away, turd. 1777 01:26:41,283 --> 01:26:44,042 Regina, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you! 1778 01:26:44,077 --> 01:26:46,550 You are a lowlife version of me... 1779 01:26:46,585 --> 01:26:50,048 ♪ I'd rather be me I'd rather be me ♪ 1780 01:26:50,083 --> 01:26:55,394 ♪ I'd rather be me Than be with ♪ 1781 01:26:55,429 --> 01:26:58,991 ♪ You! ♪ 1782 01:26:59,026 --> 01:27:00,861 [students screaming] 1783 01:27:07,100 --> 01:27:10,002 And that's how Regina George died. 1784 01:27:10,037 --> 01:27:13,709 Again, no one died! 1785 01:27:13,744 --> 01:27:16,448 I mean, technically, Regina did die for, like, 15 seconds 1786 01:27:16,483 --> 01:27:18,384 but then she was revived. 1787 01:27:18,419 --> 01:27:21,585 And of course, the rumor mill started going insane. 1788 01:27:21,620 --> 01:27:24,082 [student 1] I just saw Regina get hit by a bus. 1789 01:27:24,117 --> 01:27:26,491 [student 2] An artery come out of her neck and her head went all the way around! 1790 01:27:26,526 --> 01:27:28,020 [student 3] Guys, street safety is so important. 1791 01:27:28,055 --> 01:27:29,791 I'm just sad, like, that's all I can say. 1792 01:27:33,929 --> 01:27:35,731 We are sending our love and prayers... 1793 01:27:35,766 --> 01:27:38,162 Link in bio to my GoFundMe page to raise money. 1794 01:27:38,197 --> 01:27:39,405 Regina, we knew you would pull through. 1795 01:27:39,440 --> 01:27:41,000 How do I get this off my algorithm? 1796 01:27:41,035 --> 01:27:42,870 [student 1] I'm not one to spread rumors, 1797 01:27:42,905 --> 01:27:45,037 but I'm pretty sure I saw Cady push her right in front of it. 1798 01:27:45,072 --> 01:27:46,973 On my life, Cady pushed her. 1799 01:27:47,008 --> 01:27:49,514 I literally saw Cady push Regina. 1800 01:27:49,549 --> 01:27:51,417 Don't fill up my comments, but... karma. 1801 01:27:51,452 --> 01:27:54,552 Girls are made deranged by what's called hormones. 1802 01:27:54,587 --> 01:27:55,883 Hormones. 1803 01:27:55,918 --> 01:28:00,294 W-H-O-R... [laughing] 1804 01:28:06,225 --> 01:28:08,434 F that bitch. [student 3] F that wench. 1805 01:28:09,503 --> 01:28:11,932 [students chattering] 1806 01:28:15,839 --> 01:28:17,410 [Mr. Duvall] All right. 1807 01:28:17,445 --> 01:28:21,447 Ms. Norbury is on a, uh, temporary leave of absence. 1808 01:28:21,482 --> 01:28:23,108 Jail. Hey. 1809 01:28:23,143 --> 01:28:25,814 I heard that, Miss Rockwell. 1810 01:28:25,849 --> 01:28:28,487 Anyways, we're not sure who your substitute... 1811 01:28:28,522 --> 01:28:30,324 [breath trembles] I did it. 1812 01:28:32,658 --> 01:28:35,659 I wrote that Ms. Norbury is a drug pusher, and it's a lie. 1813 01:28:40,501 --> 01:28:42,292 [students whispering] 1814 01:28:46,166 --> 01:28:49,134 Three-week suspension. [sighs] 1815 01:28:49,169 --> 01:28:52,478 This is not who I know you to be. 1816 01:28:52,513 --> 01:28:53,479 I know. 1817 01:28:57,716 --> 01:28:59,243 Where is my Ndebele vase? 1818 01:28:59,278 --> 01:29:02,279 What? [Ms. Heron] What do you mean, what? 1819 01:29:02,314 --> 01:29:05,084 You know, the colorful vase that's always in that window. 1820 01:29:05,119 --> 01:29:06,459 Where is it? 1821 01:29:07,319 --> 01:29:09,396 [teenagers clamoring] 1822 01:29:10,960 --> 01:29:13,829 I had some friends over when you were away. 1823 01:29:13,864 --> 01:29:15,127 Go. 1824 01:29:15,162 --> 01:29:16,766 Go do your homework! 1825 01:29:16,801 --> 01:29:18,735 Um, also... 1826 01:29:20,266 --> 01:29:22,640 I need you to sign my Calculus test, 1827 01:29:22,675 --> 01:29:23,872 'cause I'm failing. 1828 01:29:53,838 --> 01:29:54,771 [knocking on door] 1829 01:29:54,806 --> 01:29:56,608 Hey. 1830 01:29:56,643 --> 01:29:59,578 I guess you'll need this back to set an alarm for tomorrow. 1831 01:30:00,372 --> 01:30:02,042 Don't want it. 1832 01:30:02,077 --> 01:30:04,275 You only have one message. 1833 01:30:04,310 --> 01:30:06,948 From someone named Karen, who says: 1834 01:30:06,983 --> 01:30:10,116 "Donut worry. I am still your freend." 1835 01:30:14,529 --> 01:30:16,727 How bad is it gonna be tomorrow? 1836 01:30:16,762 --> 01:30:18,498 I was thinking maybe I should go back 1837 01:30:18,533 --> 01:30:20,159 to being homeschooled. 1838 01:30:20,194 --> 01:30:21,259 [Ms. Heron] Sweetie, no. 1839 01:30:21,294 --> 01:30:22,997 It's too small, me and you. 1840 01:30:23,032 --> 01:30:24,933 And I think you're learning things now 1841 01:30:24,968 --> 01:30:26,803 that I don't know how to teach. 1842 01:30:33,075 --> 01:30:34,481 Good night. 1843 01:30:35,550 --> 01:30:37,275 Mom? Hmm? 1844 01:30:39,015 --> 01:30:43,116 Can you sit with me till I fall asleep? 1845 01:30:43,921 --> 01:30:44,920 Mm-hmm. 1846 01:30:56,329 --> 01:30:58,472 Oh, sweetie. [crying] 1847 01:31:00,069 --> 01:31:01,233 [sniffles] 1848 01:31:06,009 --> 01:31:07,976 [breath trembling] 1849 01:31:18,791 --> 01:31:21,286 Oh, hi. Did you want to buy some drugs? 1850 01:31:21,321 --> 01:31:24,091 No, I was just handing my quiz back. 1851 01:31:24,126 --> 01:31:26,896 You know, when the police tore apart my house 1852 01:31:26,931 --> 01:31:28,601 looking for imaginary heroin, 1853 01:31:28,636 --> 01:31:31,494 I found this old calculator that I thought I lost, so... 1854 01:31:31,529 --> 01:31:33,034 totally worth it. 1855 01:31:33,905 --> 01:31:35,201 I'm really sorry. 1856 01:31:35,236 --> 01:31:36,939 Thank you. 1857 01:31:36,974 --> 01:31:38,809 But I know you didn't write that whole book yourself. 1858 01:31:38,844 --> 01:31:40,206 You gonna tell Mr. Duvall who did? 1859 01:31:41,506 --> 01:31:42,879 No. 1860 01:31:42,914 --> 01:31:44,980 Trying this new thing where I don't talk 1861 01:31:45,015 --> 01:31:46,509 about people behind their backs. 1862 01:31:46,544 --> 01:31:49,721 Getting hit by a bus seems like enough punishment. 1863 01:31:51,054 --> 01:31:53,384 100. Welcome back, nerd. 1864 01:31:55,355 --> 01:31:57,795 Will you be attending the Spring Fling this weekend? 1865 01:31:57,830 --> 01:32:00,127 No. Everyone hates me. 1866 01:32:00,162 --> 01:32:02,360 Perfect, because I figured out a way for you 1867 01:32:02,395 --> 01:32:03,702 to earn some extra credit. 1868 01:32:03,737 --> 01:32:05,495 Hey, Bird, you ready to suit up 1869 01:32:05,530 --> 01:32:07,574 and show off your math schquills? 1870 01:32:07,609 --> 01:32:09,609 Kev, stop trying to make "schquills" happen. It's not gonna happen. 1871 01:32:09,644 --> 01:32:12,678 Jacob, get off my dick. Hey! PG-13, please. 1872 01:32:14,374 --> 01:32:17,815 [instruments tuning] 1873 01:32:24,087 --> 01:32:26,351 [drumroll] 1874 01:32:26,386 --> 01:32:27,957 [guitar strums] 1875 01:32:28,993 --> 01:32:30,388 [cymbal crashes] 1876 01:32:30,423 --> 01:32:33,028 Welcome to the ICMT State Math Championships. 1877 01:32:33,063 --> 01:32:34,898 Sponsored by SeatGeek. 1878 01:32:34,933 --> 01:32:36,559 Yeah, SeatGeek! 1879 01:32:36,594 --> 01:32:38,198 Tonight will be the culmination 1880 01:32:38,233 --> 01:32:41,135 of all you've worked for. [playing soulful tune] 1881 01:32:41,170 --> 01:32:43,203 Each right answer will be worth two points. 1882 01:32:43,238 --> 01:32:46,910 The highest score at the end of 40 minutes of play wins. 1883 01:32:46,945 --> 01:32:49,781 As always, no calculators. 1884 01:32:51,081 --> 01:32:54,016 Question one. Two, three, four! 1885 01:32:54,051 --> 01:32:56,183 [rock music playing] 1886 01:32:59,089 --> 01:33:02,057 Determine the equation of the tangent line to the graph. 1887 01:33:02,092 --> 01:33:03,322 [buzzer buzzes] 1888 01:33:03,357 --> 01:33:05,522 The answer is B. [moderator] Correct. 1889 01:33:05,557 --> 01:33:08,525 Solve the equation above using prime numbers. 1890 01:33:08,560 --> 01:33:10,637 [buzzer buzzes] [Marymount captain] Prime factor 41. 1891 01:33:10,672 --> 01:33:12,199 [moderator] Correct. 1892 01:33:12,234 --> 01:33:13,937 Please solve for x. [buzzer buzzes] 1893 01:33:13,972 --> 01:33:16,236 x = 2? [moderator] Incorrect. 1894 01:33:16,271 --> 01:33:17,941 x is greater than the value of y. 1895 01:33:17,976 --> 01:33:19,679 Correct. 1896 01:33:21,243 --> 01:33:23,507 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1897 01:33:23,542 --> 01:33:26,246 ♪ I didn't get it ♪ 1898 01:33:26,281 --> 01:33:30,547 ♪ I didn't get it, somehow ♪ 1899 01:33:30,582 --> 01:33:34,485 ♪ Smart with math But stupid with love ♪ 1900 01:33:34,520 --> 01:33:36,619 ♪ I didn't get it ♪ 1901 01:33:36,654 --> 01:33:37,862 [buzzer buzzes] Negative two! 1902 01:33:37,897 --> 01:33:38,929 [moderator] Correct. 1903 01:33:38,964 --> 01:33:40,667 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1904 01:33:42,594 --> 01:33:44,836 ♪ Whoa-oa-oa Stupid with love ♪ [buzzer buzzes] 1905 01:33:44,871 --> 01:33:47,498 Function [x] = mx + c. Correct. 1906 01:33:47,533 --> 01:33:49,467 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1907 01:33:51,306 --> 01:33:52,910 ♪ Whoa-oa-oa Stupid with love ♪ 1908 01:33:52,945 --> 01:33:54,472 Both polynomials are second degree, 1909 01:33:54,507 --> 01:33:56,078 so the asymptote is at y = 5. 1910 01:33:56,113 --> 01:33:57,783 [moderator] Excellent. 1911 01:33:57,818 --> 01:33:59,411 [band] ♪ I feel my brain Begin to rust ♪ 1912 01:33:59,446 --> 01:34:01,578 ♪ I am filled with calcu-lust ♪ 1913 01:34:01,613 --> 01:34:03,547 ♪ Does this guy work out? He must ♪ 1914 01:34:03,582 --> 01:34:05,791 ♪ All sweaty at the gym ♪ 1915 01:34:05,826 --> 01:34:10,092 ♪ Could that image be more hot? Let me just enjoy That thought ♪ 1916 01:34:10,127 --> 01:34:11,324 ♪ School was rough ♪ [Regina groans in pain] 1917 01:34:11,359 --> 01:34:12,457 ♪ But now it's not ♪ 1918 01:34:12,492 --> 01:34:13,491 [buzzer buzzes] Negative four? 1919 01:34:13,526 --> 01:34:14,899 [buzzer buzzes] True. 1920 01:34:14,934 --> 01:34:16,098 [buzzer buzzes] 29? 1921 01:34:16,133 --> 01:34:17,264 [buzzer buzzes] The slope is zero. 1922 01:34:17,299 --> 01:34:18,595 Incorrect. [buzzer buzzes] 1923 01:34:18,630 --> 01:34:20,102 The slope of the tangent line is four. 1924 01:34:20,137 --> 01:34:22,940 Excellent. [music halts] 1925 01:34:22,975 --> 01:34:25,602 Well, this has only ever happened once before. 1926 01:34:25,637 --> 01:34:28,781 Ladies and gentlemen, we have a tie. 1927 01:34:28,816 --> 01:34:30,948 [rock music resumes] 1928 01:34:30,983 --> 01:34:32,411 In the event of a tie, 1929 01:34:32,446 --> 01:34:35,018 we move into a one-on-one sudden-death round 1930 01:34:35,053 --> 01:34:37,086 where each team may choose their opponent. 1931 01:34:43,655 --> 01:34:45,160 We pick the girl. 1932 01:34:46,900 --> 01:34:48,559 We pick the girl, too. 1933 01:34:51,399 --> 01:34:53,872 Ms. Krafft, Ms. Heron, please step forward. 1934 01:34:53,907 --> 01:34:54,972 [camera shutter clicks] 1935 01:34:57,009 --> 01:34:58,206 [camera shutter clicks] 1936 01:35:00,441 --> 01:35:03,211 [cheerful rock music playing] [band vocalizing] 1937 01:35:10,484 --> 01:35:13,485 Nice to meet you. Whatever, slut. 1938 01:35:13,520 --> 01:35:16,994 Contestants, please find the limit of this expression. 1939 01:35:21,693 --> 01:35:23,726 You know, it's not me against you. 1940 01:35:23,761 --> 01:35:26,971 It's North Shore versus Marymount. 1941 01:35:28,106 --> 01:35:30,073 A very wise teacher... [buzzer buzzes] 1942 01:35:30,108 --> 01:35:31,569 The limit is negative one. 1943 01:35:33,078 --> 01:35:34,781 That answer is incorrect. 1944 01:35:37,280 --> 01:35:40,182 If Ms. Heron can answer correctly, we have a winner. 1945 01:35:40,217 --> 01:35:43,020 You got this, Golf Bird. [Cady chuckles lightly] 1946 01:35:43,055 --> 01:35:46,023 Why can't I remember anything about limits? 1947 01:35:46,058 --> 01:35:48,025 Honey, I don't know your life. 1948 01:35:49,688 --> 01:35:51,798 Why did you waste time insulting me? 1949 01:35:51,833 --> 01:35:53,723 Why did I waste time judging your hair? 1950 01:35:53,758 --> 01:35:55,428 This is not a competition. 1951 01:35:56,299 --> 01:35:58,167 It kind of is, though. 1952 01:35:58,202 --> 01:35:59,729 Right. 1953 01:36:00,600 --> 01:36:01,940 A math one. 1954 01:36:03,405 --> 01:36:05,240 ♪ I was stupid ♪ 1955 01:36:06,441 --> 01:36:08,243 ♪ But now I get it ♪ 1956 01:36:08,278 --> 01:36:12,346 ♪ No what ifs, might haves Could have been if I had ♪ 1957 01:36:12,381 --> 01:36:14,711 ♪ Only tried, not held back ♪ 1958 01:36:14,746 --> 01:36:17,054 ♪ That's not a part of my plan ♪ 1959 01:36:17,089 --> 01:36:19,122 ♪ I see the things That I missed ♪ 1960 01:36:19,157 --> 01:36:21,487 ♪ No, that's not the me That I am ♪ 1961 01:36:21,522 --> 01:36:24,457 ♪ The limit It doesn't exist! ♪ [buzzer buzzes] 1962 01:36:25,493 --> 01:36:27,229 The limit does not exist. 1963 01:36:27,264 --> 01:36:30,232 Our new state champions, the North Shore Mathletes. 1964 01:36:30,267 --> 01:36:31,629 [cheering, laughing] 1965 01:36:31,664 --> 01:36:33,136 [cheering] 1966 01:36:34,436 --> 01:36:35,908 Yeah, you like that, Marymount? 1967 01:36:35,943 --> 01:36:38,306 Get some! Get some! 1968 01:36:38,341 --> 01:36:40,044 Don't hold me back! Don't hold me back! 1969 01:36:40,079 --> 01:36:41,848 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1970 01:36:42,675 --> 01:36:44,477 ♪ But now I get it ♪ 1971 01:36:44,512 --> 01:36:46,809 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1972 01:36:46,844 --> 01:36:48,987 ♪ But now I get it ♪ 1973 01:36:49,022 --> 01:36:51,055 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1974 01:36:51,090 --> 01:36:54,124 ♪ But now I get it Stupid! ♪ 1975 01:36:54,687 --> 01:36:55,928 Have you seen Jason? 1976 01:36:55,963 --> 01:36:57,996 Like right now or like ever in life? 1977 01:36:58,031 --> 01:36:59,591 Ohhh, miss! 1978 01:36:59,626 --> 01:37:02,000 I'm supposed to hang with my fallback in there 1979 01:37:02,035 --> 01:37:03,496 but, you know, if you wanted to slip out, 1980 01:37:03,531 --> 01:37:05,663 meet in my Jeep or... Jason! 1981 01:37:05,698 --> 01:37:07,137 It's me! 1982 01:37:07,172 --> 01:37:08,633 "Fallback"? 1983 01:37:08,668 --> 01:37:10,877 No, I... I know. Yeah, I knew the whole time. 1984 01:37:10,912 --> 01:37:13,011 No, we are done! 1985 01:37:13,046 --> 01:37:14,243 Because you know what? 1986 01:37:14,278 --> 01:37:18,214 I have a 140 IQ, very toned legs, 1987 01:37:18,249 --> 01:37:20,315 and my parents love me! 1988 01:37:20,350 --> 01:37:22,416 And you will regret this when you're old 1989 01:37:22,451 --> 01:37:24,891 because I am fricking fetch! 1990 01:37:24,926 --> 01:37:27,586 That's how you use it. Come on. 1991 01:37:28,193 --> 01:37:29,654 [chattering] 1992 01:37:29,689 --> 01:37:31,557 [Mr. Duvall on mic] Okay, attention, everybody. 1993 01:37:32,560 --> 01:37:35,495 Whoo-hoo-hoo, let's go! 1994 01:37:39,369 --> 01:37:40,401 [water running] 1995 01:37:42,834 --> 01:37:43,877 Regina! 1996 01:37:46,871 --> 01:37:48,409 You look pretty. 1997 01:37:50,809 --> 01:37:52,985 I'm wearing a corrective neck collar. 1998 01:37:55,385 --> 01:37:56,846 [makeup clatters] 1999 01:37:59,488 --> 01:38:02,819 I'm sorry about the bus. I feel like it's all my fault. 2000 01:38:02,854 --> 01:38:05,228 No... No, it's not your fault. 2001 01:38:05,263 --> 01:38:07,967 Cady, don't apologize for things that aren't your fault. 2002 01:38:08,002 --> 01:38:10,464 But, yeah, I forgive you, 'cause... 2003 01:38:12,369 --> 01:38:14,204 I'm on a lot of pain medication right now. 2004 01:38:14,239 --> 01:38:16,976 You know I died for 15 seconds? 2005 01:38:17,011 --> 01:38:18,043 Yeah. 2006 01:38:19,673 --> 01:38:23,675 Anyway, my mom was really pumped to be on the news. 2007 01:38:23,710 --> 01:38:24,984 [both chuckle] 2008 01:38:25,019 --> 01:38:26,414 It's weird when people treat you 2009 01:38:26,449 --> 01:38:27,712 like you're famous or something. 2010 01:38:27,747 --> 01:38:30,088 It's amazing. [chuckles] 2011 01:38:30,123 --> 01:38:31,452 Until it's not. 2012 01:38:33,258 --> 01:38:37,194 [clears throat] Look, I... I know I have to change. 2013 01:38:38,296 --> 01:38:40,461 And I was harsh. 2014 01:38:40,496 --> 01:38:42,232 And people say that I'm a bitch. 2015 01:38:42,267 --> 01:38:44,861 You know what they would call me if I was a boy? 2016 01:38:44,896 --> 01:38:47,831 Strong. "Reginald." 2017 01:38:47,866 --> 01:38:51,736 That's what my mom was gonna name me if I was a boy, so... 2018 01:38:51,771 --> 01:38:54,772 Honestly, I would rather be "bitch." 2019 01:38:55,709 --> 01:38:57,082 [Regina laughs] 2020 01:39:00,648 --> 01:39:02,846 I like you. 2021 01:39:02,881 --> 01:39:05,717 But this medicine makes me like everyone, so... 2022 01:39:05,752 --> 01:39:07,994 [Mr. Duvall] Okay, do we have all of our nominees 2023 01:39:08,029 --> 01:39:10,656 for the Spring Fling King and Queen onstage? 2024 01:39:10,691 --> 01:39:13,032 I just want to say you're all winners. 2025 01:39:13,067 --> 01:39:18,235 And I am retiring as soon as this evening is over. 2026 01:39:18,270 --> 01:39:19,566 [drumroll] 2027 01:39:19,601 --> 01:39:22,305 The winner of the Spring Fling King is... 2028 01:39:22,340 --> 01:39:24,142 Shane Oman. 2029 01:39:24,177 --> 01:39:26,144 [all cheering] 2030 01:39:26,179 --> 01:39:27,805 Whoo! Yeah! 2031 01:39:31,184 --> 01:39:32,216 Hey. 2032 01:39:33,813 --> 01:39:35,813 Um, have you seen Janis? 2033 01:39:35,848 --> 01:39:38,090 Every day since 2009. 2034 01:39:38,125 --> 01:39:39,586 But she doesn't want to see you. 2035 01:39:39,621 --> 01:39:42,193 [Mr. Duvall] And your Spring Fling Queen... 2036 01:39:42,228 --> 01:39:44,987 Damian, I'm... I'm really sorry. 2037 01:39:45,022 --> 01:39:47,330 [Mr. Duvall] Cady Heron. [all gasp] 2038 01:39:47,365 --> 01:39:50,069 What? I mean, of course she is. 2039 01:39:50,104 --> 01:39:52,434 [mathletes cheering] [students applauding] 2040 01:39:52,469 --> 01:39:54,040 [Kevin G] Go, Cady! 2041 01:39:55,637 --> 01:39:56,867 Where is Cady? 2042 01:40:00,807 --> 01:40:02,873 [students whispering] 2043 01:40:11,422 --> 01:40:12,685 Congratulations. 2044 01:40:16,691 --> 01:40:17,723 Um... 2045 01:40:18,957 --> 01:40:20,891 I think people voted for me 2046 01:40:20,926 --> 01:40:22,431 because they think I pushed someone 2047 01:40:22,466 --> 01:40:23,795 in front of a bus. 2048 01:40:23,830 --> 01:40:27,040 It's not your fault. A bus pushed me. 2049 01:40:30,870 --> 01:40:34,146 But what is my fault is 2050 01:40:34,181 --> 01:40:35,708 the way I treated my friends. 2051 01:40:37,514 --> 01:40:40,548 I used you and I lied to you and I'm... I'm so sorry. 2052 01:40:44,048 --> 01:40:46,686 I'm also sorry to everyone 2053 01:40:46,721 --> 01:40:48,754 whose feelings got hurt from the Burn Book. 2054 01:40:48,789 --> 01:40:50,360 You know, it's really not required 2055 01:40:50,395 --> 01:40:51,988 for you to make a speech. 2056 01:40:52,023 --> 01:40:54,100 Right. Almost done, I promise. Um... 2057 01:40:55,268 --> 01:40:59,204 I think everyone looks like royalty tonight. 2058 01:40:59,239 --> 01:41:04,770 It just seems weird for one person to win this. 2059 01:41:07,412 --> 01:41:10,083 I mean, it's just a chunk of plastic. 2060 01:41:12,351 --> 01:41:14,945 We could just share it. 2061 01:41:14,980 --> 01:41:16,749 [all gasp] 2062 01:41:18,918 --> 01:41:23,228 ♪ Cheap, fake Easy to break ♪ 2063 01:41:23,263 --> 01:41:26,055 ♪ That's how I used to be ♪ 2064 01:41:26,090 --> 01:41:28,860 Here... Take it. 2065 01:41:28,895 --> 01:41:31,236 ♪ Now I'm awake ♪ 2066 01:41:31,271 --> 01:41:33,898 ♪ I'll tell you what I see ♪ 2067 01:41:33,933 --> 01:41:36,901 ♪ Plastic don't shine Glitter don't shine ♪ 2068 01:41:36,936 --> 01:41:41,070 ♪ Rhinestones don't shine The way you do ♪ 2069 01:41:41,105 --> 01:41:44,447 ♪ You are so real You are so rare ♪ 2070 01:41:44,482 --> 01:41:47,076 ♪ I see you there ♪ [piece clatters] 2071 01:41:47,111 --> 01:41:50,783 ♪ I see you ♪ 2072 01:41:50,818 --> 01:41:53,082 ♪ I see stars ♪ 2073 01:41:53,117 --> 01:41:56,459 ♪ So many stars tonight ♪ 2074 01:41:56,494 --> 01:42:00,694 ♪ You could make diamonds dull ♪ 2075 01:42:00,729 --> 01:42:04,335 ♪ You are so beautiful ♪ 2076 01:42:04,370 --> 01:42:07,239 ♪ I see stars ♪ 2077 01:42:07,274 --> 01:42:10,869 ♪ You shine as bright as day ♪ 2078 01:42:10,904 --> 01:42:14,037 ♪ I will look out for you ♪ 2079 01:42:14,072 --> 01:42:17,810 ♪ We'll light each other's way ♪ 2080 01:42:17,845 --> 01:42:21,979 ♪ You're all stars ♪ 2081 01:42:23,818 --> 01:42:25,521 All right, have a good time, everyone. 2082 01:42:25,556 --> 01:42:26,588 No vaping. 2083 01:42:26,623 --> 01:42:27,820 Rachel Hamilton! 2084 01:42:27,855 --> 01:42:28,920 Give me that inhaler. 2085 01:42:43,673 --> 01:42:45,574 Are you still mad at me? 2086 01:42:45,609 --> 01:42:47,972 I don't know. Are you still an asshole? 2087 01:42:48,843 --> 01:42:50,249 I don't think so? 2088 01:42:56,587 --> 01:42:58,015 Cute. [chuckles] 2089 01:42:59,689 --> 01:43:02,294 [student] ♪ Wherever darkness falls ♪ 2090 01:43:02,329 --> 01:43:07,497 ♪ I'll be the light ♪ 2091 01:43:07,532 --> 01:43:11,061 ♪ To guide you home ♪ 2092 01:43:11,096 --> 01:43:13,206 She sounds good. 2093 01:43:14,198 --> 01:43:16,671 But she does not go here, y'all. 2094 01:43:16,706 --> 01:43:19,542 Would you look over there? Oh, my gosh! 2095 01:43:21,876 --> 01:43:24,041 Do you want to dance? Yeah. 2096 01:43:25,550 --> 01:43:26,747 [both chuckle] 2097 01:43:29,081 --> 01:43:31,950 Congrats on winning state. The jacket looks, uh, really good on you. 2098 01:43:31,985 --> 01:43:35,624 Thanks. It has a pocket inside for a calculator. 2099 01:43:35,659 --> 01:43:36,889 What? Yeah. 2100 01:43:36,924 --> 01:43:38,055 Grool. 2101 01:43:38,090 --> 01:43:39,430 [laughs] 2102 01:43:39,465 --> 01:43:40,794 Grool. 2103 01:43:43,469 --> 01:43:46,734 [student] ♪ You stars ♪ 2104 01:43:46,769 --> 01:43:50,342 ♪ So many stars tonight ♪ 2105 01:43:50,377 --> 01:43:53,202 ♪ I see stars ♪ 2106 01:43:53,237 --> 01:43:54,874 [Damian] And that was the first time in history 2107 01:43:54,909 --> 01:43:57,382 that Spring Fling was actually fun. 2108 01:43:57,417 --> 01:44:02,046 [Janis] Ms. Norbury and Mr. Duvall got wasted. JK, JK. 2109 01:44:02,081 --> 01:44:04,818 [Damian] Karen discovered the safe joy 2110 01:44:04,853 --> 01:44:07,920 of dancing with theater boys. [Karen yelps] 2111 01:44:07,955 --> 01:44:11,759 [Janis] And Plastics and Jocks partied with math nerds. 2112 01:44:11,794 --> 01:44:13,365 [Damian] Janis danced to a pop song 2113 01:44:13,400 --> 01:44:15,059 and didn't burst into flames. 2114 01:44:15,897 --> 01:44:17,864 [Regina] Ow. Ow. Ow! 2115 01:44:17,899 --> 01:44:20,834 [Janis] And everyone else just kind of floated. 2116 01:44:23,300 --> 01:44:25,641 So the moral of our story is thus: 2117 01:44:25,676 --> 01:44:28,039 Calling someone stupid won't make you any smarter. 2118 01:44:28,074 --> 01:44:30,074 And even the people you really don't like 2119 01:44:30,109 --> 01:44:32,582 are still people who just want to coexist. 2120 01:44:32,617 --> 01:44:35,079 So get off their dicks! 2121 01:44:38,249 --> 01:44:40,216 [student] ♪ I see ♪ 2122 01:44:40,251 --> 01:44:44,055 [all] ♪ Stars! ♪ 2123 01:44:44,090 --> 01:44:46,189 [students cheering] 2124 01:44:46,224 --> 01:44:48,290 ["Not My Fault" by Reneé Rapp & Megan Thee Stallion plays] 2125 01:44:48,325 --> 01:44:49,995 ♪ Where she at? What she doing? ♪ 2126 01:44:50,030 --> 01:44:52,030 ♪ Who she with And where she from? ♪ 2127 01:44:52,065 --> 01:44:53,933 ♪ Well, she's this Oh, she's that ♪ 2128 01:44:53,968 --> 01:44:56,232 ♪ She's a flight risk On the run ♪ 2129 01:44:56,267 --> 01:44:58,036 ♪ She's back, she's back ♪ 2130 01:44:58,071 --> 01:44:59,906 ♪ Yeah, I'm back, bitch Are you done? ♪ 2131 01:44:59,941 --> 01:45:03,811 ♪ Excuse me While I bite my tongue ♪ 2132 01:45:03,846 --> 01:45:07,881 ♪ I'm back on that same shit From before ♪ 2133 01:45:07,916 --> 01:45:11,522 ♪ I can't take this pettiness Now I'm bored ♪ 2134 01:45:11,557 --> 01:45:15,790 ♪ We can champagne There's enough for us all ♪ 2135 01:45:15,825 --> 01:45:18,793 ♪ Told you who I am And what it is It's not my fault ♪ 2136 01:45:18,828 --> 01:45:22,830 ♪ It's not my fault You came with her But she might leave with me ♪ 2137 01:45:22,865 --> 01:45:26,471 ♪ It's not my fault You've got to pay For what I get for free ♪ 2138 01:45:26,506 --> 01:45:28,671 ♪ It's not my fault ♪ 2139 01:45:28,706 --> 01:45:30,640 ♪ You're like, you're like You're like in love with me ♪ 2140 01:45:30,675 --> 01:45:32,642 ♪ It's not my fault You're like in love with me ♪ 2141 01:45:32,677 --> 01:45:34,974 ♪ You're like in love with me ♪ 2142 01:45:35,009 --> 01:45:38,549 ♪ Get her number, get her name Get a good thing While you can ♪ 2143 01:45:38,584 --> 01:45:42,850 ♪ Kiss a blonde, kiss a friend Can a gay girl get an amen? ♪ 2144 01:45:42,885 --> 01:45:46,282 ♪ I'm back on that same shit From before ♪ 2145 01:45:46,317 --> 01:45:50,154 ♪ I can't take this pettiness Now I'm bored ♪ 2146 01:45:50,189 --> 01:45:54,257 ♪ We can champagne There's enough for us all ♪ 2147 01:45:54,292 --> 01:45:56,468 ♪ I told you who I am And what it is ♪ 2148 01:45:56,503 --> 01:45:58,998 ♪ It's not my fault It's not my fault ♪ 2149 01:45:59,033 --> 01:46:01,297 ♪ You came with her But she might leave with me ♪ 2150 01:46:01,332 --> 01:46:03,167 ♪ It's not my fault ♪ 2151 01:46:03,202 --> 01:46:05,939 ♪ You've got to pay For what I get for free ♪ 2152 01:46:05,974 --> 01:46:09,305 ♪ It's not my fault You're like, you're like You're like in love with me ♪ 2153 01:46:09,340 --> 01:46:11,813 ♪ It's not my fault You're like in love with me ♪ 2154 01:46:11,848 --> 01:46:13,815 ♪ You're like in love with me ♪ 2155 01:46:13,850 --> 01:46:15,685 ♪ I mean, who wouldn't want To be in love with me ♪ 2156 01:46:15,720 --> 01:46:17,687 ♪ I'm a mood board Girls got to Pinterest me ♪ 2157 01:46:17,722 --> 01:46:19,722 ♪ I'm a stallion but they come And f... me like Trojan ♪ 2158 01:46:19,757 --> 01:46:22,021 ♪ And it wouldn't be me If I ain't cause commotion ♪ 2159 01:46:22,056 --> 01:46:24,661 ♪ I'm so bad Dudes thought I was AI I ballin' like AI ♪ 2160 01:46:24,696 --> 01:46:27,158 ♪ I stick to a whole lot Of paper like a stapler Stack like Jenga ♪ 2161 01:46:27,193 --> 01:46:29,061 ♪ And you basic bitch Get stroke like a painter ♪ 2162 01:46:29,096 --> 01:46:31,195 ♪ It's funny how the mean girl Open all the doors ♪ 2163 01:46:31,230 --> 01:46:33,098 ♪ I've been told y'all I'm the black Regina George ♪ 2164 01:46:33,133 --> 01:46:35,034 ♪ Bikini top, booty shorts Megan core ♪ 2165 01:46:35,069 --> 01:46:36,838 ♪ You was hating back then Now you finna hate more ♪ 2166 01:46:36,873 --> 01:46:38,807 ♪ I got influence They do anything I endorse ♪ 2167 01:46:38,842 --> 01:46:41,073 ♪ I run s... To be a bad bitch is a sport ♪ 2168 01:46:41,108 --> 01:46:43,746 ♪ I woke up hotter Than I was yesterday ♪ 2169 01:46:43,781 --> 01:46:47,849 ♪ Don't care about no rules 'Cause I always get my way ♪ 2170 01:46:47,884 --> 01:46:49,686 ♪ It's not my fault ♪ 2171 01:46:49,721 --> 01:46:52,183 ♪ You came with her But she might leave with me ♪ 2172 01:46:52,218 --> 01:46:55,725 ♪ It's not my fault You've got to pay For what I get for free ♪ 2173 01:46:55,760 --> 01:46:59,322 ♪ It's not my fault You're like, you're like You're like in love with me ♪ 2174 01:46:59,357 --> 01:47:02,358 ♪ It's not my fault You're like in love with me ♪ 2175 01:47:02,393 --> 01:47:03,832 ♪ You're like in love with me ♪ 2176 01:47:03,867 --> 01:47:06,395 [cheers, applause] 2177 01:47:06,430 --> 01:47:08,639 [Karen] ♪ A sexy Quint From sexy Jaws ♪ 2178 01:47:08,674 --> 01:47:10,476 ♪ Catching sexy sharks ♪ 2179 01:47:10,511 --> 01:47:13,908 ♪ Sexy Eleanor Roosevelt Or sexy Joan of Arc ♪ 2180 01:47:13,943 --> 01:47:17,780 ♪ I can be a sexy pirate Or a sexy ballet dancer ♪ 2181 01:47:17,815 --> 01:47:22,147 ♪ I can be a sexy doctor And cure some sexy cancer! ♪ 2182 01:47:34,227 --> 01:47:35,996 ♪ Happy Halloween! ♪ 2183 01:47:39,804 --> 01:47:43,267 ♪ This is Modern feminism talkin' ♪ 2184 01:47:43,302 --> 01:47:46,908 ♪ Watch me as I run the world In shoes I cannot walk in ♪ 2185 01:47:46,943 --> 01:47:50,307 ♪ I can be who I want to be ♪ 2186 01:47:50,342 --> 01:47:53,915 ♪ And sex... sex ♪ 2187 01:47:53,950 --> 01:47:58,755 ♪ Sexy! ♪ 2188 01:47:58,790 --> 01:48:00,988 I'm a sexy mouse. Duh! 2189 01:48:03,322 --> 01:48:05,531 ["Let Me Go" by Nahscha playing] 2190 01:49:56,501 --> 01:49:59,106 ["Someone Gets Hurt" by Reneé Rapp playing] 2191 01:52:00,427 --> 01:52:01,899 You're next. 2192 01:52:01,934 --> 01:52:04,495 You could be really hot if you change, like, 2193 01:52:04,530 --> 01:52:05,837 everything. 166276

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