Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,203 --> 00:00:04,987
♪ It seems today
that all you see
2
00:00:05,055 --> 00:00:08,189
♪ Is violence in
movies and sex on TV
3
00:00:08,258 --> 00:00:11,877
♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values
4
00:00:11,946 --> 00:00:14,913
♪ On which we used to rely?
5
00:00:14,982 --> 00:00:18,167
♪ Lucky there's a family guy
6
00:00:18,252 --> 00:00:21,453
♪ Lucky there's a man who
positively can do
7
00:00:21,522 --> 00:00:23,104
♪ All the things that make us
8
00:00:23,190 --> 00:00:24,856
♪ Laugh and cry
9
00:00:24,925 --> 00:00:29,928
♪ He's a family guy ♪
10
00:00:35,385 --> 00:00:37,085
I was very brave when the doctor
11
00:00:37,154 --> 00:00:38,787
gave me that shot,
wasn't I, Lois?
12
00:00:38,856 --> 00:00:40,684
Yes, Peter, you were very brave.
13
00:00:40,708 --> 00:00:42,807
Even when I knew that
he was gonna give me the shot,
14
00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:44,943
I just kept
looking at him in the eye
15
00:00:45,011 --> 00:00:47,045
and talking to him
about my summer plans.
16
00:00:47,114 --> 00:00:48,480
You did very good.
17
00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:50,527
See, Peter?
It wasn't so bad.
18
00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:51,794
Yeah, except for
having to sit next to
19
00:00:51,818 --> 00:00:53,952
that screaming autistic lady
in the waiting room.
20
00:01:08,519 --> 00:01:10,686
I don't know what you want!
I don't know how to help!
21
00:01:12,223 --> 00:01:13,566
Hi, there.
Excuse me.
22
00:01:13,590 --> 00:01:15,940
I seem to be lost.
Can you guys help me?
23
00:01:16,009 --> 00:01:18,260
Oh, my God.
Are you Ryan Reynolds?
24
00:01:18,329 --> 00:01:21,313
From The Proposal
and The Change-Up
and a ton of upcoming stuff?
25
00:01:21,382 --> 00:01:22,881
Yeah, that's me.
26
00:01:22,949 --> 00:01:24,794
I was on my way to Newport
and I kind of
got turned around.
27
00:01:24,818 --> 00:01:27,797
Of course, Mr. Reynolds,
we'd be happy to
give you directions.
28
00:01:27,821 --> 00:01:30,956
You take 138 to
the Jamestown Bridge,
and you're gonna follow the...
29
00:01:31,024 --> 00:01:32,090
There's a fire truck.
30
00:01:32,159 --> 00:01:34,237
Yes, I see it, Peter.
It's a fire truck.
31
00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:36,305
And after the bridge,
just follow the signs.
32
00:01:36,329 --> 00:01:38,541
Thanks.
Hey, what happened
to your arm?
33
00:01:38,565 --> 00:01:41,032
I just went to the doctor,
got my cholesterol checked.
34
00:01:41,101 --> 00:01:44,413
Wow. Why does a guy
in his 20s need to get
his cholesterol checked?
35
00:01:44,437 --> 00:01:45,771
Oh, come on, now.
36
00:01:45,839 --> 00:01:47,679
Oh, hey.
I never got your name.
37
00:01:47,707 --> 00:01:49,707
Peter. Peter Griffin.
And I'm...
38
00:01:49,777 --> 00:01:51,777
Catch you later, Peter.
39
00:01:52,295 --> 00:01:53,845
Wow, he was really nice.
40
00:01:53,913 --> 00:01:56,014
Not like when I met
that bitch Shelley Duvall.
41
00:01:57,584 --> 00:01:59,944
Hi, I'm Shelley Duvall.
Very nice to meet you.
42
00:01:59,986 --> 00:02:01,436
Big fucking deal.
43
00:02:01,505 --> 00:02:03,985
Came right up to me,
like I was just
dying to meet her.
44
00:02:04,041 --> 00:02:06,241
Peter, you're gonna
have to let that one go.
45
00:02:12,182 --> 00:02:14,116
Hi, Mrs. Janetti.
I'm here to pick up Stewie.
46
00:02:14,184 --> 00:02:16,829
Oh, sure, Brian.
He's in the playroom
with Gavin.
47
00:02:16,853 --> 00:02:19,138
Gavin.
That's a stupid name.
48
00:02:19,206 --> 00:02:20,872
And nobody likes you at school.
49
00:02:20,941 --> 00:02:23,892
I tried to stick up
for you but I can't,
because everybody hates you.
50
00:02:23,961 --> 00:02:25,694
You're gonna be
ugly when you grow up.
51
00:02:25,763 --> 00:02:29,113
And everything in
your house is cheap.
And it smells in here.
52
00:02:29,182 --> 00:02:30,766
Hey, Brian. Bye!
53
00:02:34,688 --> 00:02:37,383
That was fun. I like Gavin.
54
00:02:37,407 --> 00:02:39,107
Yay! This is such
a great song.
55
00:02:40,577 --> 00:02:42,644
Really?
Yeah, really.
56
00:02:42,712 --> 00:02:44,679
I don't have to defend
Carrie Underwood to you.
57
00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:46,481
She is doing just
fine without you.
58
00:02:50,954 --> 00:02:53,266
Brian, I'm just going
to sit in the car
till the song's over.
59
00:02:53,290 --> 00:02:55,468
All right,
but don't take too long.
It'll drain the battery.
60
00:02:55,492 --> 00:02:57,475
Oh, shut up. It's not
draining the battery.
61
00:02:59,746 --> 00:03:03,264
♪ I took a Louisville slugger
to both headlights
62
00:03:03,333 --> 00:03:06,635
♪ I slashed
a hole in all four tires
63
00:03:06,703 --> 00:03:10,706
♪ Maybe next time
he'll think before he cheats ♪
64
00:03:10,774 --> 00:03:12,123
I should be on Glee.
65
00:03:12,893 --> 00:03:14,408
I should be on Glee!
66
00:03:18,065 --> 00:03:20,715
Oh, my God.
I just drove.
67
00:03:20,784 --> 00:03:23,518
That was amazing.
I can drive!
68
00:03:23,587 --> 00:03:27,155
Now I can do
a slow cruise past my
ex-girlfriend's apartment.
69
00:03:28,892 --> 00:03:31,343
11:45 and the lights are on.
70
00:03:31,412 --> 00:03:33,378
Doing it with
the lights on now, whore?
71
00:03:33,447 --> 00:03:35,447
Don't mind looking at his body?
72
00:03:35,516 --> 00:03:36,815
I love you so much, though.
73
00:03:41,622 --> 00:03:44,822
Lois, that dog
with the different
colored eyes is back.
74
00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:47,470
Eww. And gross!
It looks like
he's got a boner.
75
00:03:47,494 --> 00:03:49,138
Peter, just leave him alone.
76
00:03:49,162 --> 00:03:51,996
No, this is what Bob Barker's
been talking about
all these years.
77
00:03:53,484 --> 00:03:55,804
Go on! Get!
Get out of here,
weird boner dog!
78
00:03:57,554 --> 00:03:59,438
Hey, look who it is.
79
00:03:59,506 --> 00:04:02,152
Hey, Ryan Reynolds.
What are you doing
in Cleveland's house?
80
00:04:02,176 --> 00:04:04,536
Well, believe it or not,
they've decided
to shoot my movie
81
00:04:04,561 --> 00:04:06,495
in Quahog instead of Newport.
82
00:04:06,563 --> 00:04:08,996
I'm playing Hitler.
But he's a young Hitler,
83
00:04:09,065 --> 00:04:12,166
and he's got a rocking body.
It's called Hotler.
84
00:04:12,235 --> 00:04:14,013
Color me seven bucks lighter.
85
00:04:14,037 --> 00:04:16,016
Hey, I'm so excited that
we're gonna be neighbors.
86
00:04:16,040 --> 00:04:17,439
We should totally hang out.
87
00:04:17,507 --> 00:04:18,873
Yeah, that'd be great.
88
00:04:18,942 --> 00:04:21,209
Okay, I'm embarrassed.
89
00:04:21,277 --> 00:04:23,211
I'm standing out
here without a shirt on
90
00:04:23,279 --> 00:04:26,715
and my pajama bottoms
are riding insanely
low on my hips.
91
00:04:26,784 --> 00:04:28,461
Hey, how much money you make?
92
00:04:28,485 --> 00:04:31,103
You'd think enough
for a shirt, right?
93
00:04:31,171 --> 00:04:33,071
So I'm having this
housewarming thing tonight
94
00:04:33,140 --> 00:04:34,550
and I'd love it if you came by.
95
00:04:34,574 --> 00:04:35,874
Yeah, that sounds great.
96
00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:38,303
Anything beats what goes on
at my house Friday nights.
97
00:04:39,379 --> 00:04:40,706
Hey, Lois, what's going on here?
98
00:04:40,730 --> 00:04:43,398
Oh, it's my book club, Peter.
Come join us.
99
00:04:43,483 --> 00:04:44,650
Oh, okay!
100
00:04:51,558 --> 00:04:54,142
All right, let's see.
New novel, new novel.
101
00:04:54,211 --> 00:04:56,310
New novel.
What's it about?
102
00:04:56,379 --> 00:04:58,713
What's it about? A guy...
103
00:04:58,782 --> 00:05:01,349
A guy who loses everything,
104
00:05:01,417 --> 00:05:03,484
but finds his soul
105
00:05:03,553 --> 00:05:05,153
in Canada.
106
00:05:05,222 --> 00:05:07,222
All right, we're cooking now.
107
00:05:07,290 --> 00:05:10,291
Cooking now.
And the whole book
is an e-mail
108
00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:11,727
to his daughter,
109
00:05:11,795 --> 00:05:13,729
who's dead.
110
00:05:13,797 --> 00:05:16,331
And his name will be Norm Hull.
111
00:05:16,399 --> 00:05:18,600
Because he's just a normal guy.
112
00:05:18,668 --> 00:05:20,013
But not everybody will get that.
113
00:05:20,037 --> 00:05:22,887
That's just for the scholars
a hundred years from now.
114
00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:25,023
Okay, Rupert,
you ready to go for a drive?
115
00:05:39,823 --> 00:05:42,107
Oh, my God, Rupert.
This is such a thrill!
116
00:05:42,176 --> 00:05:45,911
Look at me, I'm driving.
I'm driving a real car!
I don't believe it!
117
00:05:45,979 --> 00:05:48,073
Well, I'd say we need
to put on some tunes.
118
00:05:48,097 --> 00:05:51,382
Hey, welcome back to
Weenie and The Butt on 97.1.
119
00:05:51,435 --> 00:05:53,567
♪ 97.1! ♪
120
00:05:53,636 --> 00:05:56,416
Ooh! Weenie and The Butt.
Just like the grown-ups
listen to.
121
00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:59,758
And that was
Baby by Justin Bieberfeaturing Ludacris,
122
00:05:59,827 --> 00:06:02,827
which means it's timeto give away someJustin Bieber tickets!
123
00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:06,898
That's right, Butt.Our fifth callerwill ween those tickets!
124
00:06:06,966 --> 00:06:08,895
♪ Fifth caller
Caller number five
125
00:06:08,919 --> 00:06:10,218
♪ Not four, not six
126
00:06:10,287 --> 00:06:11,552
♪ Oh, five ♪
127
00:06:11,621 --> 00:06:13,065
Cinco! Cinco! Cinco!
128
00:06:13,089 --> 00:06:14,267
Hey, you know what, Rupert?
129
00:06:14,291 --> 00:06:16,269
You know what I should do,
just, like, as a goof?
130
00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:18,437
I should try to win those
Justin Bieber tickets
131
00:06:18,461 --> 00:06:20,306
just so I can,
like, tear them up
132
00:06:20,330 --> 00:06:22,490
or use them to
go to the concert.
133
00:06:23,766 --> 00:06:25,411
It's ringing, Rupert.
It's ringing.
134
00:06:25,435 --> 00:06:28,755
I'm too nervous.
They're celebrities.
You talk to them.
135
00:06:38,649 --> 00:06:41,183
Oh, God. Oh, my God.
I'm in so much trouble.
136
00:06:41,251 --> 00:06:43,751
Congratulations.
You're caller number five.
137
00:06:43,820 --> 00:06:45,860
You're going to
see Justin Bieber!
138
00:06:45,922 --> 00:06:51,092
Oh, sweet Jesus!Yes! Jesse, I won!Never say never!
139
00:07:06,910 --> 00:07:10,245
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Brian's gonna be so mad at me.
140
00:07:10,314 --> 00:07:12,547
What am I gonna do?
Okay, it's all right.
141
00:07:12,615 --> 00:07:15,128
I'll just get
a little bit of paint
and cover up the dents.
142
00:07:15,152 --> 00:07:17,535
Unattractive women
do it all the time.
143
00:07:17,587 --> 00:07:19,032
You look pretty today, Carol.
144
00:07:19,056 --> 00:07:22,257
Thanks. It's probably
just the dress
and the makeup.
145
00:07:22,325 --> 00:07:25,525
Now that I look closer,
yeah, I think that's
what it is, too.
146
00:07:29,099 --> 00:07:30,881
Hey, you made it!
147
00:07:30,950 --> 00:07:32,867
And you brought a friend.
Great.
148
00:07:32,953 --> 00:07:35,737
I'm his wife, Lois.
We actually met the other day.
149
00:07:35,822 --> 00:07:37,989
Oh, sorry,
I meet so many people.
150
00:07:38,058 --> 00:07:39,668
But there's really no way
you could know that.
151
00:07:39,692 --> 00:07:42,221
Yeah, she's a housewife,
she don't know.
Whatever.
152
00:07:42,245 --> 00:07:44,111
You got booze in here?
153
00:07:44,180 --> 00:07:46,158
Is it me, or did she
just make that weird?
154
00:07:46,182 --> 00:07:48,183
Please.
It was definitely not you.
155
00:07:48,252 --> 00:07:49,896
Hey, is this shirt too tight?
156
00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:51,130
I'm feeling really
self-conscious.
157
00:07:51,154 --> 00:07:53,016
No, not at all.
So it looks good
like this?
158
00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:54,956
Yeah, it looks good.
Thanks.
159
00:07:55,024 --> 00:07:56,419
Now I don't know what to say.
160
00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:59,577
Hey, I got, like, an insider
Hollywood question for you.
161
00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:02,097
Is "L.A." short
for something?
162
00:08:02,165 --> 00:08:03,848
Ha! You're a riot.
163
00:08:03,917 --> 00:08:05,684
Hey, hey,
so what's all this about,
164
00:08:05,752 --> 00:08:07,863
everyone in Quahog
likes to tickle fight?
165
00:08:07,887 --> 00:08:09,053
What is that?
166
00:08:09,122 --> 00:08:10,438
What? I never heard that.
167
00:08:10,506 --> 00:08:11,850
Yeah, apparently,
it's like a thing.
168
00:08:11,874 --> 00:08:13,119
It is?
Yeah.
169
00:08:13,143 --> 00:08:14,520
I mean,
they also said that people
170
00:08:14,544 --> 00:08:17,156
who pretend not
to have heard of it
are chicken.
171
00:08:17,180 --> 00:08:18,379
Well, I ain't no chicken.
172
00:08:18,448 --> 00:08:19,992
One-nothing!
173
00:08:20,016 --> 00:08:21,615
No, two-nothing!
174
00:08:22,753 --> 00:08:25,370
Three-nothing!
Fight over! Fight over!
175
00:08:25,438 --> 00:08:27,216
Wow, you got a lot
of catching up to do,
176
00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:28,951
and tomorrow night
in the dark, huh?
177
00:08:28,975 --> 00:08:31,008
In the dark?
Yeah, if you say so.
178
00:08:31,077 --> 00:08:34,345
Just don't tickle me
in my lower abdomen.
I'm super ticklish there.
179
00:08:34,414 --> 00:08:36,131
Lower abdomen.
180
00:08:36,199 --> 00:08:38,716
You're gonna wish
you never said that.
181
00:08:38,785 --> 00:08:41,069
This might be
totally off-the-wall,
182
00:08:42,338 --> 00:08:44,216
but are you doing
anything Thursday night?
183
00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:45,585
You probably have plans anyway.
184
00:08:45,609 --> 00:08:48,576
You know what.
Forget it,
forget it, forget it.
185
00:08:49,412 --> 00:08:51,195
Nervous.
186
00:08:51,264 --> 00:08:53,275
You know, Ryan,
most people take
one look at me
187
00:08:53,299 --> 00:08:55,099
and just
assume that I have plans.
188
00:08:55,168 --> 00:08:56,367
So I never get asked out.
189
00:08:56,436 --> 00:08:58,469
But I frequently
don't have plans,
190
00:08:58,539 --> 00:09:01,205
so yes, I would love to do
something with you
on Thursday night.
191
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:04,086
Yes! Oh, my God,
right now would
be the worst time
192
00:09:04,110 --> 00:09:05,588
for you to tickle
my lower abdomen.
193
00:09:05,612 --> 00:09:07,790
Because it's so exposed
'cause I'm cheering.
194
00:09:07,814 --> 00:09:09,581
Yeah, Thursday night!
195
00:09:09,650 --> 00:09:12,367
Your big mouth just
got you in trouble.
196
00:09:12,436 --> 00:09:13,780
I lose.
Peter one, you zero.
197
00:09:13,804 --> 00:09:15,348
Oh, I lose again.
Peter two, you zero.
198
00:09:15,372 --> 00:09:16,572
You've been practicing.
199
00:09:18,675 --> 00:09:20,235
We now return to
200
00:09:20,293 --> 00:09:22,460
the end of a depressing
1970s sci-fi movie,
201
00:09:22,529 --> 00:09:24,178
starring a guy in a turtleneck.
202
00:09:26,666 --> 00:09:28,249
We've gone far enough.
203
00:09:28,318 --> 00:09:30,702
I think we're safe from
The Corporation here.
204
00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:31,771
Adzin, look!
205
00:09:43,633 --> 00:09:45,166
It can't be.
206
00:09:45,235 --> 00:09:49,404
No! We'll never
defeat The Corporation!
207
00:09:49,473 --> 00:09:50,872
They've won!
208
00:09:50,957 --> 00:09:52,740
There is one way, Adzin.
209
00:09:52,809 --> 00:09:54,642
You can shoot yourself.
210
00:09:54,711 --> 00:09:57,294
If it's the only way, I must.
211
00:10:21,405 --> 00:10:23,571
What the hell?
Stewie, get out here!
212
00:10:25,942 --> 00:10:28,120
Look at this.
Do you know
anything about this?
213
00:10:28,144 --> 00:10:30,411
About what?
About what
a beautiful day it...
214
00:10:30,479 --> 00:10:33,614
Oh, my God, that is surprising.
215
00:10:33,683 --> 00:10:35,400
I had to stop that last sentence
216
00:10:35,469 --> 00:10:37,235
in the middle
because I was so surprised.
217
00:10:37,304 --> 00:10:38,881
What happened?
Gee, I don't know.
218
00:10:38,905 --> 00:10:39,982
Do you know what happened?
219
00:10:41,107 --> 00:10:42,323
I'm sorry, what was that?
220
00:10:42,392 --> 00:10:43,825
I was laughing
at that funny thing
221
00:10:43,894 --> 00:10:45,510
you said at dinner
the other night.
222
00:10:45,579 --> 00:10:47,712
What funny thing?
223
00:10:47,781 --> 00:10:51,449
You remember what
you said about Lois's
"potatoes au rotten?"
224
00:10:51,518 --> 00:10:52,533
Huh.
225
00:10:52,602 --> 00:10:54,247
Didn't think anybody heard that.
226
00:10:54,271 --> 00:10:55,514
Wish you'd laughed at the time.
227
00:10:55,538 --> 00:10:57,149
What the hell
happened to my car?
228
00:10:57,173 --> 00:10:58,689
Well, I don't know, man,
229
00:10:58,758 --> 00:11:01,476
but the good news is,
it doesn't look
all that bad, Brian.
230
00:11:01,544 --> 00:11:04,979
It's just,
it's that spot right there
that's upsetting you, right?
231
00:11:05,065 --> 00:11:06,481
Stewie, I know it was you.
232
00:11:11,537 --> 00:11:13,299
Your potato joke was terrible.
233
00:11:13,323 --> 00:11:15,290
I can't believe
you drove my car!
234
00:11:15,358 --> 00:11:17,075
You could have
gotten yourself killed!
235
00:11:17,144 --> 00:11:18,571
I'm gonna have to
tell Peter and Lois.
236
00:11:18,595 --> 00:11:21,328
No! No, you can't tell them!
I'll be in so much trouble!
237
00:11:21,397 --> 00:11:22,881
Stewie, I have to.
238
00:11:22,949 --> 00:11:25,111
All right,
I have covered for you
plenty of times before,
239
00:11:25,135 --> 00:11:26,351
but not this time.
240
00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:27,797
This is very dangerous,
and I have to
241
00:11:27,821 --> 00:11:29,141
make sure you never do it again.
242
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,771
I won't, I swear!
243
00:11:35,645 --> 00:11:37,211
Stewie, calm down.
244
00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:40,181
Sometimes in life,
you just have to
accept what's coming to you.
245
00:11:40,249 --> 00:11:42,209
Like the contestant
who gets the lesser showcase
246
00:11:42,251 --> 00:11:44,185
on The Price is Right.
247
00:11:44,254 --> 00:11:47,638
Lindsay, your showcase
is all about relaxation.
248
00:11:47,708 --> 00:11:50,942
And what better placeto relax than in yourbrand-new hammock?
249
00:11:52,546 --> 00:11:54,706
This sturdy andportable hammockfrom Swingway
250
00:11:54,730 --> 00:11:57,665
turns any patio into
a tropical paradise.
251
00:11:57,733 --> 00:12:02,520
And you can entertain yourselfon your patio bydrawing with chalk!
252
00:12:02,589 --> 00:12:04,939
Yes, Pratt and Millwood
eight-color pastel chalk
253
00:12:05,008 --> 00:12:08,025
will turn your patio
into a tropical art studio.
254
00:12:08,094 --> 00:12:09,805
But you'll have
to pack your chalk,
255
00:12:09,829 --> 00:12:12,575
because you're going to bestaying six daysand seven nights
256
00:12:12,599 --> 00:12:15,749
at your parents' house
in Wilmington, Delaware!
257
00:12:16,853 --> 00:12:18,752
I moved my abortion for this.
258
00:12:26,963 --> 00:12:29,997
Um, hey, thanks for taking me
out to dinner, Ryan,
259
00:12:30,066 --> 00:12:32,077
but I got to say,
this food looks
a little weird.
260
00:12:32,101 --> 00:12:34,702
Oh, Peter,
Moroccan food is the jizz.
261
00:12:34,770 --> 00:12:37,383
I don't know.
Looks like it might give me
the kind of farts I get
262
00:12:37,407 --> 00:12:38,607
from eating Mexican food.
263
00:12:48,134 --> 00:12:49,616
Hey, do these
pants look all right?
264
00:12:49,685 --> 00:12:51,997
Sometimes I put them on,
and I'm thinking
I look all-balls.
265
00:12:52,021 --> 00:12:53,487
No, I think you're good.
266
00:12:53,556 --> 00:12:54,989
You think my balls are good?
267
00:12:55,058 --> 00:12:57,408
You're so weird.
It's awesome, though.
268
00:12:57,476 --> 00:12:58,742
Oh, I...
269
00:12:58,812 --> 00:13:00,378
I don't know.
270
00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:02,491
Hey, have you noticed
what a jerk the mailman
is in this town?
271
00:13:02,515 --> 00:13:04,983
Like, he said there is no way
272
00:13:05,051 --> 00:13:07,018
Peter Griffin
could crush a baby bird
273
00:13:07,087 --> 00:13:08,987
with his bare foot
while I watched.
274
00:13:09,055 --> 00:13:11,372
That guy talks
more crap about me...
275
00:13:13,193 --> 00:13:14,742
Mmm. Oh!
276
00:13:14,811 --> 00:13:17,261
You got to taste
this lamb tagine.
277
00:13:17,330 --> 00:13:18,957
Here.
No, that...
No, that's okay.
278
00:13:18,981 --> 00:13:20,114
Come on, you'll love it.
279
00:13:20,182 --> 00:13:21,222
Ah...
280
00:13:21,284 --> 00:13:22,566
Just a taste.
281
00:13:30,660 --> 00:13:34,228
That was intense.
282
00:13:34,297 --> 00:13:36,914
What you just did.
283
00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:39,234
Lots of...
Lots of flavors.
284
00:13:40,053 --> 00:13:41,786
Whoops.
285
00:13:41,854 --> 00:13:45,473
Whoa, freeze frame!
What's gonna happen next?
286
00:13:45,542 --> 00:13:47,823
I think I got to
go to the bathroom.
287
00:13:56,937 --> 00:13:57,977
What am I gonna do?
288
00:13:58,020 --> 00:13:59,715
I'm gonna be in so much trouble
289
00:13:59,739 --> 00:14:01,350
when they find out
I wrecked Brian's car!
290
00:14:01,374 --> 00:14:03,641
They'll probably
ship me off to Siberia.
291
00:14:03,710 --> 00:14:05,426
This sucks.
I hate it here.
292
00:14:05,495 --> 00:14:09,464
Shut up. Drink wolf milk
and watch Russian cartoons.
293
00:14:09,532 --> 00:14:11,310
We now return to popular
294
00:14:11,334 --> 00:14:13,262
Russian cartoon,
Shoe and Shoelace.
295
00:14:13,286 --> 00:14:14,552
Shoe and Shoelace!
296
00:14:14,620 --> 00:14:16,448
One is meaningless
without the other!
297
00:14:22,812 --> 00:14:25,263
Well, that's it.
I have no choice.
298
00:14:25,332 --> 00:14:26,530
I've got to run away.
299
00:14:34,023 --> 00:14:36,074
Guess I'm on my own now, Rupert.
300
00:14:36,142 --> 00:14:37,252
It could be worse, though.
301
00:14:37,276 --> 00:14:38,704
At least I'm not getting stabbed
302
00:14:38,728 --> 00:14:40,272
by some random
guy on the street.
303
00:14:42,465 --> 00:14:44,248
See? It's the exact opposite.
304
00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:46,133
Ow! It happened anyway!
305
00:14:51,975 --> 00:14:53,308
Hey, Stewie, you up?
306
00:14:56,379 --> 00:14:57,411
What the...
307
00:15:00,449 --> 00:15:02,329
Brian, I've decided to run away.
308
00:15:02,368 --> 00:15:03,734
Don't come looking for me.
309
00:15:03,803 --> 00:15:05,347
And definitely don't chase me to
310
00:15:05,371 --> 00:15:06,882
the airport
and catch me at the gate
311
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:08,584
just before I'm
about to get on the plane
312
00:15:08,608 --> 00:15:10,886
with, like,an emotional speechand possibly flowers.
313
00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:12,754
For example,
it would be awful if
314
00:15:12,778 --> 00:15:14,590
all the TSA people
were gathered around,
315
00:15:14,614 --> 00:15:16,258
watching this emotional moment,
316
00:15:16,282 --> 00:15:18,716
even the older black
female carry-on scanner
317
00:15:18,784 --> 00:15:20,896
who initially stopped you
at the baggage check,
318
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:23,254
but who after you told her
of your intentions,
319
00:15:23,323 --> 00:15:24,722
said, "Go get him, child,"
320
00:15:24,790 --> 00:15:27,125
in flagrant disregard
of all newly-implemented
321
00:15:27,193 --> 00:15:28,959
post-9/11 security measures.
322
00:15:29,028 --> 00:15:31,996
And if you were consideringbringing a boom boxto play music,
323
00:15:32,065 --> 00:15:34,531
I would suggest any
one of these six songs.
324
00:15:39,505 --> 00:15:41,550
So again, ran away.
Don't come after me.
325
00:15:41,574 --> 00:15:45,476
♪ And I want to thank you ♪
326
00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:52,567
Dirty whores, all of you.
327
00:15:53,353 --> 00:15:54,585
Hey, Peter.
328
00:15:54,654 --> 00:15:55,854
Lois, we got a problem.
329
00:15:55,921 --> 00:15:58,167
I think Ryan Reynolds
is in love with me.
330
00:15:58,191 --> 00:16:00,057
What? Don't be ridiculous.
331
00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:01,987
It's true.
Last night we were
at this restaurant,
332
00:16:02,011 --> 00:16:03,622
and he tried to gay kiss me.
333
00:16:03,646 --> 00:16:05,290
I'm telling you,
he wants to get with me.
334
00:16:05,314 --> 00:16:06,464
Peter, come on.
335
00:16:06,533 --> 00:16:08,699
Why would any man
dress well, groom himself,
336
00:16:08,768 --> 00:16:11,168
and lift weights
just to sleep with other men?
337
00:16:11,237 --> 00:16:12,503
He's not gay.
338
00:16:12,572 --> 00:16:14,567
Well, I don't care
what you say.
He likes me.
339
00:16:14,591 --> 00:16:17,425
And we do have chemistry,
I won't deny that.
340
00:16:17,494 --> 00:16:20,327
I will take responsibility
for my part in this.
341
00:16:20,397 --> 00:16:22,557
I'm just gonna go over there
and let him down easy.
342
00:16:23,933 --> 00:16:25,399
Oh, Snooki died.
343
00:16:28,872 --> 00:16:30,072
Last stop.
344
00:16:32,608 --> 00:16:34,492
What? This isn't the airport.
345
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:37,995
Oh, my God, Rupert!
We've got to get out of here!
346
00:16:38,815 --> 00:16:40,831
Aw, damn it!
347
00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:43,000
Oh, no, no.
Baby fall down!
348
00:16:43,069 --> 00:16:45,109
Is that...
Is that Consuela?
349
00:16:46,773 --> 00:16:48,889
Baby all alone in street.
350
00:16:48,958 --> 00:16:50,357
I take baby home.
351
00:16:50,427 --> 00:16:51,608
It's me. Stewie.
352
00:16:51,677 --> 00:16:53,522
Don't you remember?
You used to clean for us.
353
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:56,786
We used to make
you use the bathroom
at the gas station.
354
00:17:00,136 --> 00:17:01,936
Hey, you.
Uh, hey, Ryan.
355
00:17:01,971 --> 00:17:03,304
Bad time?
356
00:17:03,372 --> 00:17:04,638
Um... Perfect time.
357
00:17:04,707 --> 00:17:06,323
Come on in.
I was just oiling my legs.
358
00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:09,571
So, hey, what's on for tonight?
359
00:17:09,595 --> 00:17:11,439
You know, my dentist
leaves his office unlocked.
360
00:17:11,463 --> 00:17:13,992
I was thinking we
could do some nitrous
and then have dinner in there.
361
00:17:14,016 --> 00:17:15,233
Look, Ryan,
362
00:17:15,301 --> 00:17:17,251
you're a great guy
and everything,
363
00:17:17,320 --> 00:17:19,386
but I don't like
you in that way.
364
00:17:19,455 --> 00:17:21,695
I mean, there are
some things that
I would do with you,
365
00:17:21,724 --> 00:17:23,774
but my heart wouldn't be in it.
366
00:17:23,843 --> 00:17:25,242
What are you talking about?
367
00:17:25,311 --> 00:17:27,995
That you like me,
and you want to
be my boyfriend.
368
00:17:30,700 --> 00:17:31,882
You think I'm gay?
369
00:17:31,951 --> 00:17:33,151
Where did you get that?
370
00:17:33,219 --> 00:17:35,786
Uh, um...
You tried to kiss me.
371
00:17:35,854 --> 00:17:38,801
Peter, I'm not gay.
What the hell's
the matter with you?
372
00:17:38,825 --> 00:17:40,919
Look, look, look,
let me put it to you
this way.
373
00:17:40,943 --> 00:17:42,209
I'm attracted to you
374
00:17:42,278 --> 00:17:45,346
in the way that a man
is attracted to a woman,
375
00:17:45,414 --> 00:17:46,541
but I'm not gay.
376
00:17:46,565 --> 00:17:47,776
When you live out in Hollywood,
377
00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:49,411
you learn that life is
about different spirits
378
00:17:49,435 --> 00:17:51,130
and energies you
meet along the way.
379
00:17:51,154 --> 00:17:54,166
I just thought maybe
our spirits could
intertwine, you know?
380
00:17:54,190 --> 00:17:55,856
Our energies could merge.
381
00:17:55,924 --> 00:17:58,526
Like my spirit could go
up inside your energy.
382
00:17:58,594 --> 00:18:01,345
I have so much to learn
about show business.
383
00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:02,991
But you know what?
I could never
384
00:18:03,015 --> 00:18:04,527
really be attracted to somebody
385
00:18:04,551 --> 00:18:08,185
somebody who uses labels
like "gay" and "straight."
386
00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:09,498
Maybe you should just go.
387
00:18:09,522 --> 00:18:11,655
Well, now, wait a second.
What do you mean?
388
00:18:11,724 --> 00:18:12,801
This isn't working.
389
00:18:12,825 --> 00:18:14,153
It was a nice thought,
but I think
390
00:18:14,177 --> 00:18:15,487
we should go our separate ways.
391
00:18:15,511 --> 00:18:18,246
No, Ryan. I get it now.
392
00:18:18,314 --> 00:18:20,047
I can be what you want.
We could...
393
00:18:20,115 --> 00:18:21,782
Peter.
Don't embarrass yourself.
394
00:18:21,851 --> 00:18:24,091
You need to just let this go.
395
00:18:25,754 --> 00:18:27,283
Tickle fight!
Tickle fight!
No, Peter, no!
396
00:18:27,307 --> 00:18:28,917
Tickle fight!
Tickle fight! Tickle fight!
Peter! No! No!
397
00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:29,941
Oh, my God...
398
00:18:36,031 --> 00:18:37,514
It's time for you to leave.
399
00:18:40,253 --> 00:18:41,373
I can change.
400
00:18:42,037 --> 00:18:43,487
I can change.
401
00:18:43,556 --> 00:18:46,624
I'm sorry, Peter.
We're done.
We can never talk again.
402
00:18:46,693 --> 00:18:48,576
Here's a cell phone
so we can always talk.
403
00:18:54,333 --> 00:18:56,584
Don't you guys
have any tub toys?
404
00:18:56,669 --> 00:18:58,068
Here. Is rattle.
405
00:18:58,137 --> 00:19:00,137
This is prescription medication.
406
00:19:00,206 --> 00:19:02,939
And it's not even
your name on the label.
407
00:19:03,008 --> 00:19:05,154
What is this?
What's in this tub?
408
00:19:05,178 --> 00:19:06,877
Is jicama.
Jicama?
409
00:19:06,945 --> 00:19:10,514
And what is... What? What?
This is a chicken leg.
410
00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:12,316
Are you also making soup?
411
00:19:12,385 --> 00:19:13,851
For quinceanera.
412
00:19:13,919 --> 00:19:15,853
Big party.
Many peoples.
413
00:19:15,921 --> 00:19:17,001
Oh, my God.
414
00:19:20,510 --> 00:19:22,977
I bet even you guys
don't watch George Lopez.
415
00:19:24,446 --> 00:19:25,663
Consuela?
416
00:19:25,732 --> 00:19:27,915
Hey, it's Brian.
I'm looking for Stewie.
417
00:19:28,001 --> 00:19:30,668
No, no baby aqui.
418
00:19:30,737 --> 00:19:32,086
I peed in your soup.
419
00:19:32,155 --> 00:19:33,754
Happy 15th birthday.
420
00:19:33,823 --> 00:19:37,174
Which, by the way, is not
a special occasion
in the normal world.
421
00:19:37,243 --> 00:19:38,454
Stewie, I've been worried sick.
422
00:19:38,478 --> 00:19:39,638
What the hell
are you doing here?
423
00:19:39,662 --> 00:19:41,356
Brian?
How did you find me?
424
00:19:41,380 --> 00:19:44,214
I used my nose,
which I always forget about.
425
00:19:44,283 --> 00:19:45,616
Come on, let's go.
426
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:46,996
No, I'm not going back!
I can't!
427
00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:48,697
They're gonna be mad at me!
428
00:19:48,721 --> 00:19:50,187
I didn't tell anyone.
429
00:19:50,256 --> 00:19:52,156
You... You didn't?
430
00:19:52,225 --> 00:19:53,841
No, I didn't.
431
00:19:53,910 --> 00:19:56,760
Look, I thought about it,
and to be honest,
it's probably my fault
432
00:19:56,829 --> 00:19:58,628
for leaving you
alone in the car.
433
00:19:58,697 --> 00:20:01,159
And if you promise
never to do it again,
I won't say anything.
434
00:20:01,183 --> 00:20:02,549
Okay, I promise.
435
00:20:03,703 --> 00:20:05,130
My baby!
What?
436
00:20:05,154 --> 00:20:06,253
I say, let go of me.
437
00:20:06,322 --> 00:20:07,404
Consuela, we're leaving.
438
00:20:07,473 --> 00:20:08,572
My baby!
439
00:20:08,625 --> 00:20:10,908
Hey, she says
it's her baby, man.
440
00:20:10,976 --> 00:20:12,176
Now get out of here.
441
00:20:14,246 --> 00:20:16,346
Is my baby. Ernesto.
442
00:20:16,415 --> 00:20:18,160
No, I'm not...
I'm not Ernesto...
443
00:20:18,184 --> 00:20:20,304
Okay, this is so
eff'd up right now.
444
00:20:27,944 --> 00:20:29,471
I did not want to
have to do that.
445
00:20:29,495 --> 00:20:31,361
They were very
nice to me up until then.
446
00:20:35,501 --> 00:20:37,479
Peter, stop staring
out the window.
447
00:20:37,503 --> 00:20:40,705
Ryan's gone.
He finished his movie,
he's moved out.
448
00:20:40,773 --> 00:20:42,768
How could I have been so blind?
449
00:20:42,792 --> 00:20:45,226
How could I not have
seen what he offered?
450
00:20:45,311 --> 00:20:47,305
I think the whole
thing was very strange.
451
00:20:47,329 --> 00:20:49,296
He thought you were strange!
How about that?
452
00:20:49,364 --> 00:20:50,484
Whatever.
453
00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:54,218
I just can't help but wonder.
454
00:20:54,287 --> 00:20:56,070
Will I ever see him again?
32682
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
