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00:00:02,176 --> 00:00:04,482
♪♪ [theme]
2
00:00:51,094 --> 00:00:55,881
♪♪ [1950s pop]
3
00:00:55,925 --> 00:00:57,274
Ohh! I can't believe
4
00:00:57,318 --> 00:00:59,755
the Mayo brothers
started this way.
5
00:00:59,798 --> 00:01:01,452
Or even
the Mills Brothers.
6
00:01:01,496 --> 00:01:03,933
Try reading something.
7
00:01:03,976 --> 00:01:05,239
I read everything.
8
00:01:05,282 --> 00:01:06,892
Toss a ball.
9
00:01:08,503 --> 00:01:12,115
I've tossed everything,
including breakfast.
10
00:01:12,159 --> 00:01:14,204
There's always
trawling for nurses.
11
00:01:14,248 --> 00:01:16,163
I've trawled all the nurses.
12
00:01:16,206 --> 00:01:18,339
Let's have a blast.
13
00:01:18,382 --> 00:01:20,036
We could drown
the dull in booze.
14
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:21,646
It won't do any good.
15
00:01:21,690 --> 00:01:24,388
My dull has learned
how to swim.
16
00:01:24,432 --> 00:01:26,086
Maybe I can get a note
from my parents
17
00:01:26,129 --> 00:01:27,739
excusing me from the war.
18
00:01:27,783 --> 00:01:29,393
MAN [on P.A.]:
Attention, all personnel.
19
00:01:29,437 --> 00:01:31,308
Due to conditions
beyond our control,
20
00:01:31,352 --> 00:01:34,355
we regret to announce that
lunch is now being served.
21
00:01:34,398 --> 00:01:35,617
They got a lot of guts.
22
00:01:35,660 --> 00:01:37,140
And they keep
serving them.
23
00:01:39,621 --> 00:01:42,145
You realize this
is an anniversary?
24
00:01:42,189 --> 00:01:45,148
They've given us liver or fish
ten straight days in a row.
25
00:01:45,192 --> 00:01:46,323
Eleven.
26
00:01:48,891 --> 00:01:51,198
If they try to serve that
to us one more time today,
27
00:01:51,241 --> 00:01:53,243
-I'm gonna throw a fit.
-You won't throw a fit.
28
00:01:53,287 --> 00:01:54,723
All right, then,
I'll throw a berserk
29
00:01:54,766 --> 00:01:56,159
with a strong
resemblance to a fit.
30
00:01:56,203 --> 00:01:57,552
It's somethin' to do.
31
00:01:57,595 --> 00:01:59,075
Gonna eat with your feet?
32
00:02:01,208 --> 00:02:02,905
Only if they have
corn on the cob.
33
00:02:20,183 --> 00:02:21,837
Terrific outfit, Klinger.
34
00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:24,361
Like it? I don't usually wear
floor-length during the day,
35
00:02:24,405 --> 00:02:26,407
but once in a while,
you feel like bein' dressy.
36
00:02:28,235 --> 00:02:29,801
You look like
my dead aunt.
37
00:02:29,845 --> 00:02:31,455
MAN [on P.A.]:
Nurse Chetsberger,
38
00:02:31,499 --> 00:02:34,415
please contact the Red Cross
representative.
39
00:02:34,458 --> 00:02:36,156
Nurse Chetsberger,
40
00:02:36,199 --> 00:02:38,636
please contact the Red Cross
representative.
41
00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:40,247
How can you
eat this slop?
42
00:02:42,640 --> 00:02:44,642
My mouth is tone-deaf.
43
00:02:47,819 --> 00:02:49,125
Succotash, Doc?
44
00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:50,387
Yes, please.
45
00:02:50,431 --> 00:02:51,432
Potatoes?
46
00:02:51,475 --> 00:02:52,694
Fine.
47
00:02:54,304 --> 00:02:55,784
Creamed corn?
48
00:02:55,827 --> 00:02:56,785
Thank you.
49
00:02:57,873 --> 00:02:58,917
[ladle tapping]
50
00:03:00,223 --> 00:03:01,703
And for the entree today...
51
00:03:01,746 --> 00:03:03,183
Here it comes.
52
00:03:03,226 --> 00:03:04,227
Steady.
53
00:03:06,708 --> 00:03:09,058
We have liver or fish.
54
00:03:10,755 --> 00:03:13,889
I didn't hear
you say that.
55
00:03:13,932 --> 00:03:15,717
'cause it isn't possible.
56
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:19,460
It's inhuman to serve the
same food day after day.
57
00:03:19,503 --> 00:03:21,288
The Geneva Convention
prohibits the killing
58
00:03:21,331 --> 00:03:22,985
-of our taste buds!
-Easy.
59
00:03:23,028 --> 00:03:25,727
I simply cannot eat
the same food every day!
60
00:03:25,770 --> 00:03:27,859
Fish, liver, day after day!
61
00:03:27,903 --> 00:03:30,558
I've eaten a river of liver
and an ocean of fish!
62
00:03:32,255 --> 00:03:35,084
I've eaten so much fish,
I'm ready to grow gills!
63
00:03:36,172 --> 00:03:37,695
I've eaten so much liver,
64
00:03:37,739 --> 00:03:39,001
I can only make love
65
00:03:39,044 --> 00:03:40,655
if I'm smothered
in bacon and onions!
66
00:03:40,698 --> 00:03:42,222
Are we gonna stand for this?
67
00:03:42,265 --> 00:03:43,919
Are we gonna let them
do this to us?
68
00:03:43,962 --> 00:03:45,747
No, I say! No!
69
00:03:45,790 --> 00:03:48,184
We're not gonna eat
this dreck anymore!
70
00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:52,057
We want something else!
We want something else!
71
00:03:52,101 --> 00:03:53,885
We want something else!
72
00:03:53,929 --> 00:03:55,670
[all chanting]
We want something else!
73
00:03:55,713 --> 00:03:57,933
Draftees of the world, arise!
74
00:03:57,976 --> 00:03:59,978
You have noting to lose
but your cookies!
75
00:04:00,022 --> 00:04:03,068
We want something else!
We want something else!
76
00:04:03,112 --> 00:04:06,507
We want something else!
We want something else!
77
00:04:06,550 --> 00:04:09,466
We want something else!
We want something else!
78
00:04:09,510 --> 00:04:12,991
We want something else!
We want something else!
79
00:04:13,035 --> 00:04:16,343
We want something else!
We want something else!
80
00:04:16,386 --> 00:04:19,520
We want something else!
We want something else!
81
00:04:19,563 --> 00:04:21,130
[shouting]
82
00:04:21,173 --> 00:04:22,087
We want something else!
83
00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:26,135
We want something else!
84
00:04:26,178 --> 00:04:27,919
[shouting]
85
00:04:27,963 --> 00:04:29,704
We want something else!
86
00:04:32,228 --> 00:04:35,318
Just who do you think
you are, Pierce?
87
00:04:35,362 --> 00:04:38,495
I broke under
the pressure, warden.
88
00:04:38,539 --> 00:04:40,628
Eleven straight days,
Henry.
89
00:04:40,671 --> 00:04:43,065
Well, don't you think
I've tried for some
relieviation?
90
00:04:43,108 --> 00:04:44,414
-Yes, sir.
-Radar--
91
00:04:44,458 --> 00:04:46,024
What happened
to the frozen turkey
92
00:04:46,068 --> 00:04:47,417
I ordered you to order?
93
00:04:47,461 --> 00:04:48,810
Well, I put in
the requisition, sir,
94
00:04:48,853 --> 00:04:50,377
-marked "urgent."
-Well?
95
00:04:50,420 --> 00:04:52,074
They sent us 5,000
athletic supporters.
96
00:04:52,117 --> 00:04:54,642
Marked "urgent."
[laughing]
97
00:04:54,685 --> 00:04:57,297
I don't find that such
a rib-tickler, McIntyre.
98
00:04:59,081 --> 00:05:00,822
Ribs.
99
00:05:00,865 --> 00:05:02,389
All right, Radar,
why don't you get on the horn--
100
00:05:02,432 --> 00:05:03,999
Trade the athletic supporters.
101
00:05:04,042 --> 00:05:05,305
...see if we can't trade
those athletic supporters?
102
00:05:06,654 --> 00:05:08,612
Barbecued spareribs!
103
00:05:08,656 --> 00:05:10,832
That's what I want!
That's what I need!
104
00:05:10,875 --> 00:05:13,182
What you need
is a tranquilizer
105
00:05:13,225 --> 00:05:15,227
about the size of
a horse's rump!
106
00:05:15,271 --> 00:05:16,794
There's a place in Chicago
107
00:05:16,838 --> 00:05:18,230
near the Dearborn Street
Station.
108
00:05:18,274 --> 00:05:19,754
I don't know
the name of it.
109
00:05:19,797 --> 00:05:22,713
They served ribs.
The best in the world!
110
00:05:22,757 --> 00:05:24,541
They had a barbecue
sauce with it--
111
00:05:24,585 --> 00:05:28,371
a flamboyant, devil-may-care,
yet introspective sauce.
112
00:05:28,415 --> 00:05:29,503
Spareribs?
113
00:05:30,634 --> 00:05:31,983
Ambrosia.
114
00:05:32,027 --> 00:05:33,202
The gods on Olympus,
115
00:05:33,245 --> 00:05:34,595
when they got tired
of pizza,
116
00:05:34,638 --> 00:05:35,987
they sent out
for these ribs!
117
00:05:36,031 --> 00:05:37,293
Ha! Yum, yum.
118
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,643
I think he's gonna
have an accident.
119
00:05:39,687 --> 00:05:42,080
Get him the barbecue
ribs, Henry.
120
00:05:42,124 --> 00:05:44,082
I don't just want ribs.
I want those ribs.
121
00:05:44,126 --> 00:05:46,389
Pierce, you're acting
like one of my kids.
122
00:05:46,433 --> 00:05:50,175
Henry, I'm all ribbed out.
I have barbecue deficiency.
123
00:05:50,219 --> 00:05:51,786
Don't you get the
clinical picture?
124
00:05:51,829 --> 00:05:53,309
Withdrawal trauma.
125
00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:55,050
Take blood, you'll see.
126
00:05:55,093 --> 00:05:58,140
Half hemoglobin, half
barbecue sauce from Chicago.
127
00:05:58,183 --> 00:06:00,098
You're off your hinges.
128
00:06:00,142 --> 00:06:02,318
Henry, they were
sensational.
129
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,059
The ribs burned
my upper lip.
130
00:06:04,102 --> 00:06:05,452
I had a little cut.
131
00:06:05,495 --> 00:06:07,192
I kept the scar alive
for a year.
132
00:06:07,236 --> 00:06:08,411
The pain was exquisite.
133
00:06:08,455 --> 00:06:09,891
What was the name
of this place?
134
00:06:09,934 --> 00:06:11,371
I can't remember!
135
00:06:11,414 --> 00:06:12,894
It was near the
Dearborn Street Station.
136
00:06:12,937 --> 00:06:14,939
Well, why don't you call
the station and ask?
137
00:06:14,983 --> 00:06:17,464
The number's
DEarborn 5-7500.
138
00:06:17,507 --> 00:06:18,813
How the hell
do you know that?
139
00:06:18,856 --> 00:06:20,902
I was born in Illinois.
140
00:06:20,945 --> 00:06:23,513
I spent half my life
at the Dearborn Station.
141
00:06:23,557 --> 00:06:24,775
It was the first place
my mother let me
142
00:06:24,819 --> 00:06:26,690
go to the men's
room alone.
143
00:06:26,734 --> 00:06:28,344
Come to think of it,
144
00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:30,825
it's where I met
my wife Lorraine.
145
00:06:30,868 --> 00:06:32,609
I gotta have those ribs.
146
00:06:32,653 --> 00:06:34,655
Sounds like you're
ready to go into labor.
147
00:06:34,698 --> 00:06:37,745
I'll get 'em...
somehow.
148
00:06:37,788 --> 00:06:40,704
Pierce, I don't care
what you do in private.
149
00:06:40,748 --> 00:06:43,315
You want ribs?
It makes me no never mind.
150
00:06:43,359 --> 00:06:45,187
But as long as you're
in this man's army camp,
151
00:06:45,230 --> 00:06:47,755
you behave yourself,
and you fly in formation.
152
00:06:47,798 --> 00:06:49,452
-RADAR: Yes, sir.
-Radar?
153
00:06:49,496 --> 00:06:51,236
Let's get started
on the inspection.
154
00:06:51,280 --> 00:06:52,281
Yes, sir.
155
00:07:00,811 --> 00:07:02,334
It was oregano
in the sauce,
156
00:07:02,378 --> 00:07:04,511
and just the slightest
suggestion of vinegar.
157
00:07:04,554 --> 00:07:06,774
And the coleslaw
tasted like heather.
158
00:07:08,471 --> 00:07:10,560
But those ribs, those ribs!
159
00:07:10,604 --> 00:07:12,780
I'm sure they came from pigs
that were virgins.
160
00:07:12,823 --> 00:07:15,783
You know? You know?
161
00:07:15,826 --> 00:07:18,220
[laughing]
They were terrific.
162
00:07:18,263 --> 00:07:19,613
Mm!
163
00:07:19,656 --> 00:07:21,789
-HAWKEYE: Mm.
-[muffled groaning]
164
00:07:29,536 --> 00:07:30,798
I gotta have 'em.
165
00:07:32,060 --> 00:07:33,757
I gotta have 'em, Trap.
166
00:07:37,544 --> 00:07:38,936
[clatter]
167
00:07:38,980 --> 00:07:40,547
Halt!
What's the password?
168
00:07:40,590 --> 00:07:42,897
Out of my way, or I'll
split your head open.
169
00:07:42,940 --> 00:07:44,594
Close enough.
170
00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:50,470
Radar?
171
00:07:51,993 --> 00:07:53,037
Radar, it's Hawkeye.
Let me in.
172
00:07:53,081 --> 00:07:54,256
I gotta use the phone.
173
00:07:54,299 --> 00:07:55,736
[knocking continues]
174
00:07:55,779 --> 00:07:57,215
Radar!
Come on, wake up!
175
00:07:57,259 --> 00:07:58,826
The war's over.
We won, 8-5.
176
00:08:05,267 --> 00:08:06,921
-Radar.
-Don't shoot!
177
00:08:06,964 --> 00:08:08,226
Get on the phone.
178
00:08:08,270 --> 00:08:10,011
-Who's calling?
-You are.
179
00:08:10,054 --> 00:08:11,752
Get out of bed, or I'll
take your tonsils out
180
00:08:11,795 --> 00:08:13,014
through your armpits.
181
00:08:13,057 --> 00:08:14,755
Come on.
We're calling Chicago.
182
00:08:14,798 --> 00:08:16,670
DEarborn 5-7500.
183
00:08:16,713 --> 00:08:18,585
-Chicago?
-That toddlin' town.
184
00:08:18,628 --> 00:08:20,978
Home of the stockyards,
Mrs. O'Leary's cow,
185
00:08:21,022 --> 00:08:23,546
The White Sox, The Cubs,
Carl Sandburg.
186
00:08:23,590 --> 00:08:25,766
Who's he pitch for?
187
00:08:25,809 --> 00:08:27,202
The poet.
188
00:08:27,245 --> 00:08:29,247
"Chicago."
189
00:08:29,291 --> 00:08:31,162
Hog Butcher for the world.
190
00:08:31,206 --> 00:08:34,035
Tool maker, stacker of wheat,
191
00:08:34,078 --> 00:08:36,951
Player with railroads and
the nation's freight handler.
192
00:08:36,994 --> 00:08:40,781
Stormy, husky, brawling,
city of the big shoulders.
193
00:08:40,824 --> 00:08:42,565
Sandburg knew, Radar.
194
00:08:42,609 --> 00:08:44,567
Spare-ribber for the universe.
195
00:08:44,611 --> 00:08:46,569
Maker of meat on a bone.
196
00:08:46,613 --> 00:08:48,310
The home of the Pigsicle.
197
00:08:50,312 --> 00:08:53,750
Give me your tired,
your poor, your coleslaw.
198
00:08:53,794 --> 00:08:54,882
Sparky?
199
00:08:54,925 --> 00:08:57,406
Yeah, it's-it's Radar.
200
00:08:57,449 --> 00:08:59,669
Yeah, listen, I really--
I-I know it's late, Sparky.
201
00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:02,803
But, uh, can you patch me
through to Tokyo,
202
00:09:02,846 --> 00:09:05,153
Honolulu, San Francisco?
203
00:09:05,196 --> 00:09:08,069
Yeah, I'm headed
for Chicago. I'll hold.
204
00:09:08,112 --> 00:09:10,593
Radar, I'll let you
lick my fingers for this.
205
00:09:10,637 --> 00:09:12,464
Are these ribs
really that great?
206
00:09:12,508 --> 00:09:15,772
Ah... better than sex.
207
00:09:15,816 --> 00:09:18,296
I don't know
how good sex is.
208
00:09:18,340 --> 00:09:20,777
No woman could follow them.
Especially the big ones.
209
00:09:22,779 --> 00:09:23,954
The ribs, not the women.
210
00:09:25,608 --> 00:09:27,784
They come in a sheet
about that size.
211
00:09:27,828 --> 00:09:29,090
Wow!
212
00:09:29,133 --> 00:09:31,179
It's like making love
to a xylophone.
213
00:09:31,222 --> 00:09:33,747
He's got Honolulu
asking for San Francisco.
214
00:09:33,790 --> 00:09:35,226
Good man, that Sparky.
215
00:09:35,270 --> 00:09:37,011
There may be a knighthood
in this for him.
216
00:09:37,054 --> 00:09:38,882
With sparerib clusters.
217
00:09:38,926 --> 00:09:41,363
Okay, pal.
I'll take it from here.
218
00:09:41,406 --> 00:09:42,756
Thanks.
You done terrific!
219
00:09:42,799 --> 00:09:43,974
You did terrific.
220
00:09:44,018 --> 00:09:45,149
That's what I said he done.
221
00:09:47,630 --> 00:09:48,588
Hello--
222
00:09:49,719 --> 00:09:51,068
Hello!
223
00:09:51,112 --> 00:09:53,593
San Francisco? Right.
224
00:09:53,636 --> 00:09:55,595
Uh, can you speak up
a little louder, please?
225
00:09:55,638 --> 00:09:57,379
I'm calling from Korea.
226
00:09:57,422 --> 00:09:58,728
Korea!
227
00:09:58,772 --> 00:10:00,991
Rhymes with "dia."
228
00:10:01,035 --> 00:10:05,561
Right. The place that Bob Hope
comes to all the time.
229
00:10:05,605 --> 00:10:08,042
Uh, listen, this is official
military business,
230
00:10:08,085 --> 00:10:09,478
priority one!
231
00:10:09,521 --> 00:10:11,828
Uh, can you put me
through to Chicago?
232
00:10:11,872 --> 00:10:14,091
Chicago!
233
00:10:14,135 --> 00:10:17,138
Y-Yeah, the place
with the big shoulders.
234
00:10:17,181 --> 00:10:19,662
DEarborn 5-7500.
235
00:10:19,706 --> 00:10:22,360
DEarborn 5-7500.
236
00:10:22,404 --> 00:10:23,927
Right!
237
00:10:23,971 --> 00:10:25,189
They're dialing.
238
00:10:25,233 --> 00:10:26,843
-I love her.
-It's a he.
239
00:10:26,887 --> 00:10:28,062
I love him.
240
00:10:28,105 --> 00:10:29,411
It's ringing.
241
00:10:31,021 --> 00:10:32,762
Dearborn Station?
242
00:10:32,806 --> 00:10:35,199
Yeah? Hold on!
243
00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:38,812
Uh, hello. This is, uh,
Cranston Lamont
244
00:10:38,855 --> 00:10:40,465
of the Chicago Tribune.
245
00:10:40,509 --> 00:10:42,511
Uh, I'm over here
in Korea, doing a, uh,
246
00:10:42,554 --> 00:10:45,079
story on our star-freckled
spangled fighting boys.
247
00:10:45,122 --> 00:10:47,255
-Wow!
-Uh, I'm doing a backgrounder
248
00:10:47,298 --> 00:10:48,691
on a Windy City boy,
249
00:10:48,735 --> 00:10:50,171
and I need to
know something.
250
00:10:50,214 --> 00:10:51,694
Uh, across the street
from the station,
251
00:10:51,738 --> 00:10:53,435
down the block,
there's a five-and-ten.
252
00:10:53,478 --> 00:10:55,176
And right next to that
there's a dry cleaning
253
00:10:55,219 --> 00:10:56,786
and, uh, and dyeing place.
254
00:10:56,830 --> 00:10:58,222
And right next to that,
255
00:10:58,266 --> 00:10:59,441
there's this place
that sells ribs.
256
00:10:59,484 --> 00:11:01,269
What-what's the name--
257
00:11:01,312 --> 00:11:03,271
Adam's Ribs!
That's it. Adam's Ribs.
258
00:11:03,314 --> 00:11:05,708
A-D-A-M-S R-I-B-S.
259
00:11:05,752 --> 00:11:07,492
That's it.
That's it.
260
00:11:07,536 --> 00:11:08,842
-Mm!
-You'll smear it.
261
00:11:08,885 --> 00:11:10,974
I-I got it engraved
on my tongue.
262
00:11:11,018 --> 00:11:12,889
Listen, you got
a telephone book there?
263
00:11:12,933 --> 00:11:14,412
Uh, all right--
264
00:11:14,456 --> 00:11:16,719
I want you to look up
the number for me!
265
00:11:16,763 --> 00:11:18,155
Look, I know
you're busy, Mister.
266
00:11:18,199 --> 00:11:21,245
Um, what is your name,
please?
267
00:11:21,289 --> 00:11:22,943
For the article.
268
00:11:22,986 --> 00:11:24,292
Resnick?
269
00:11:24,335 --> 00:11:25,815
Bernard Resnick?
270
00:11:25,859 --> 00:11:28,296
Is that with an S or a Z?
271
00:11:28,339 --> 00:11:30,733
Uh, thank you,
Mr. Resnick.
272
00:11:30,777 --> 00:11:32,387
That's a lovely name.
273
00:11:32,430 --> 00:11:34,650
One of my daughters
is called Resnick.
274
00:11:36,043 --> 00:11:38,262
You got it? All r--
275
00:11:38,306 --> 00:11:40,525
DEarborn 5 2-7-5-0.
276
00:11:40,569 --> 00:11:42,658
5 2-7-5-0.
277
00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:44,747
Wait, wait, wait!
D-Don't-don't hang up!
278
00:11:44,791 --> 00:11:46,793
Get the operator for me.
279
00:11:46,836 --> 00:11:49,709
Thank you, Mr. Resnick.
God bless your choo-choos.
280
00:11:51,667 --> 00:11:53,190
Operator?
281
00:11:53,234 --> 00:11:56,498
I want DEarborn 5 2-7-5-0.
282
00:11:58,239 --> 00:12:00,067
This is it, Radar.
We're approaching Nirvana.
283
00:12:00,110 --> 00:12:01,503
Is that near Chicago?
284
00:12:03,157 --> 00:12:04,114
Hello!
285
00:12:05,376 --> 00:12:06,508
What do you mean, busy?
286
00:12:08,249 --> 00:12:10,991
Operator, I'm a soldier.
I'm a wounded man in Korea.
287
00:12:11,034 --> 00:12:13,689
I'm trying to reach my family
from a foxhole!
288
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:16,344
[imitating shell whistling
and explosion]
289
00:12:16,387 --> 00:12:18,302
[imitating cannon firing]
290
00:12:18,346 --> 00:12:23,612
[imitating rifles firing]
291
00:12:23,655 --> 00:12:26,049
Hello, Adam's Ribs?
292
00:12:26,093 --> 00:12:28,225
I'd like to place
a takeout order, please.
293
00:12:28,269 --> 00:12:30,706
All right,
you got a pencil?
294
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,447
I want 20 pounds--
295
00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:35,102
No, make that 40 pounds
of your best ribs.
296
00:12:35,145 --> 00:12:37,017
The jumbos.
297
00:12:37,060 --> 00:12:39,410
And I want some
barbecue sauce.
298
00:12:39,454 --> 00:12:41,543
A gallon.
299
00:12:41,586 --> 00:12:43,066
Yeah, we're
having a party.
300
00:12:43,110 --> 00:12:45,503
My mother's
out on parole.
301
00:12:45,547 --> 00:12:47,288
All right, now, look.
Now, don't cook 'em.
302
00:12:47,331 --> 00:12:48,550
I just want them packaged.
303
00:12:48,593 --> 00:12:50,552
Name of Pierce.
B.F. Pierce.
304
00:12:50,595 --> 00:12:53,207
Somebody'll pick 'em up.
305
00:12:53,250 --> 00:12:54,817
Good, okay.
Thank you.
306
00:12:56,993 --> 00:12:58,603
Couldn't have done it
without you, Radar.
307
00:12:58,647 --> 00:13:01,084
Thank you, sir.
308
00:13:01,128 --> 00:13:02,738
-Oh!
-What?
309
00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:04,305
-Damn it.
-What?
310
00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:07,221
I forgot to order
the coleslaw.
311
00:13:08,526 --> 00:13:09,832
Hello?
312
00:13:17,753 --> 00:13:19,276
Step one. Spareribs ordered.
313
00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:20,495
Check.
314
00:13:20,538 --> 00:13:23,150
Step two.
Ribs must be picked up.
315
00:13:23,193 --> 00:13:25,674
Step three.
Ribs must be paid for.
316
00:13:25,717 --> 00:13:27,067
Step four.
317
00:13:27,110 --> 00:13:29,721
Ribs must be flown to us
here in Paradise Valley.
318
00:13:29,765 --> 00:13:33,334
What a picture you are
of gluttony, greed, lust,
319
00:13:33,377 --> 00:13:34,944
oral sensation.
320
00:13:34,988 --> 00:13:36,467
You're seeing the real me.
321
00:13:36,511 --> 00:13:39,644
As a child, I once ate
12 banana sandwiches.
322
00:13:39,688 --> 00:13:42,169
I slept in the bathroom
for a week.
323
00:13:42,212 --> 00:13:43,692
-Charming.
-Now, Inspector,
324
00:13:43,735 --> 00:13:45,085
I figure that the same person
325
00:13:45,128 --> 00:13:46,869
who picks the ribs up
can pay for them
326
00:13:46,913 --> 00:13:48,479
and take them over to
the airport in Chicago.
327
00:13:48,523 --> 00:13:50,046
Elementary.
328
00:13:50,090 --> 00:13:52,396
This as-yet-unknown person
gives them to a pilot
329
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:53,920
or a stewardess,
who delivers them
330
00:13:53,963 --> 00:13:56,139
to Military Air Transport
in San Francisco.
331
00:13:56,183 --> 00:13:57,488
The rest is downhill.
332
00:13:57,532 --> 00:13:59,099
So is your head.
333
00:13:59,142 --> 00:14:00,796
They all laughed at
Christopher Columbus
334
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:02,276
when he said
the world was round,
335
00:14:02,319 --> 00:14:04,365
but he went on to
write a great song.
336
00:14:04,408 --> 00:14:06,106
You keep this up and
the squirrels are gonna
337
00:14:06,149 --> 00:14:07,759
bury your head somewhere.
338
00:14:07,803 --> 00:14:10,632
Pilots and stewardesses
love to do us favors.
339
00:14:10,675 --> 00:14:12,982
I once did a stewardess
a great favor.
340
00:14:13,026 --> 00:14:15,463
I didn't scream while
she forced herself on me.
341
00:14:18,466 --> 00:14:20,033
TRAPPER: There's
an interesting couple.
342
00:14:20,076 --> 00:14:21,425
Tillie and Mac.
343
00:14:21,469 --> 00:14:23,166
Sir, I've got a bone
344
00:14:23,210 --> 00:14:24,689
I'd like to pick with you.
345
00:14:24,733 --> 00:14:25,908
Wait a minute, Klinger.
346
00:14:25,952 --> 00:14:27,692
First bones first.
Any luck, Radar?
347
00:14:27,736 --> 00:14:30,347
Oh, I checked the personnel
roster and all the patients,
348
00:14:30,391 --> 00:14:31,914
and nobody lives in Chicago.
349
00:14:31,958 --> 00:14:33,307
What a great time
to steal it.
350
00:14:33,350 --> 00:14:35,396
Rats!
Double rats!
351
00:14:35,439 --> 00:14:38,573
Sir, in the riot you caused
by going off your noodle,
352
00:14:38,616 --> 00:14:41,054
you got succotash
on my stole!
353
00:14:41,097 --> 00:14:44,013
I apologize, Klinger,
from the heart of my bottom.
354
00:14:44,057 --> 00:14:46,059
And liver, too,
you got on it!
355
00:14:46,102 --> 00:14:47,669
Don't say "liver!"
356
00:14:47,712 --> 00:14:50,628
You say that word again,
I'll set your teeth on fire!
357
00:14:50,672 --> 00:14:52,979
I'll have your skunk cleaned.
358
00:14:54,850 --> 00:14:57,157
Right now I'm thinking
about bigger things.
359
00:14:57,200 --> 00:14:58,767
Don't you come
from Chicago?
360
00:14:58,810 --> 00:15:00,160
No, he's from Toledo.
361
00:15:00,203 --> 00:15:01,639
But I get my lingerie
from Chicago.
362
00:15:01,683 --> 00:15:02,771
And it's beautiful.
363
00:15:03,946 --> 00:15:04,904
I hear.
364
00:15:06,383 --> 00:15:07,689
You know anybody
in Chicago?
365
00:15:07,732 --> 00:15:09,212
I got an uncle there.
366
00:15:09,256 --> 00:15:10,648
This could be something.
367
00:15:10,692 --> 00:15:12,433
Does he like you?
Would he do you a favor?
368
00:15:12,476 --> 00:15:14,174
Favor?
He'd kill for me.
369
00:15:14,217 --> 00:15:15,697
He'd kill for you.
370
00:15:15,740 --> 00:15:17,873
For $100,
he'd kill for anybody.
371
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:20,571
Why don't you put out
a contract on the spareribs?
372
00:15:20,615 --> 00:15:22,617
Would your uncle handle
a package for me?
373
00:15:22,660 --> 00:15:24,010
Sure, for a price.
374
00:15:24,053 --> 00:15:25,620
He doesn't have to
kill the package.
375
00:15:25,663 --> 00:15:28,144
Just pick it up and deliver it
to the airport in Chicago.
376
00:15:28,188 --> 00:15:30,755
It's done.
Won't cost you a dime.
377
00:15:30,799 --> 00:15:33,410
Lady, you're a real gentleman.
378
00:15:33,454 --> 00:15:36,326
All you gotta do is sign
my psycho discharge papers,
379
00:15:36,370 --> 00:15:38,241
you and Captain McIntyre.
380
00:15:38,285 --> 00:15:40,548
Klinger, that paper has to
be signed by three doctors.
381
00:15:40,591 --> 00:15:41,810
We're only two.
382
00:15:41,853 --> 00:15:43,812
Nobody else
wants to be three.
383
00:15:43,855 --> 00:15:45,553
Okay. The deal's off!
384
00:15:45,596 --> 00:15:46,902
Wait a second! Wait--
385
00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:49,078
No discharge,
no package,
386
00:15:49,122 --> 00:15:52,777
And I expect you to
un-succotash my stole, sir!
387
00:15:54,692 --> 00:15:56,346
TRAPPER:
So emotional.
388
00:15:56,390 --> 00:15:57,957
Meanwhile, my ribs
are sitting there
389
00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:59,567
like barbecued orphans.
390
00:15:59,610 --> 00:16:01,699
Gee, I wish
I could help.
391
00:16:01,743 --> 00:16:03,527
I wonder how you'd
taste charcoaled.
392
00:16:03,571 --> 00:16:04,920
Hey!
393
00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:06,748
You know,
I just remembered.
394
00:16:06,791 --> 00:16:09,272
I knew a redhead
in Chicago.
395
00:16:09,316 --> 00:16:11,579
Oh, boy.
You talk about your ribs.
396
00:16:11,622 --> 00:16:12,797
Yeah, yeah?
397
00:16:12,841 --> 00:16:15,017
What was her name?
398
00:16:15,061 --> 00:16:16,279
Mildred.
399
00:16:16,323 --> 00:16:18,455
That's right.
Mildred Feeney.
400
00:16:18,499 --> 00:16:20,022
Would she do
you a favor?
401
00:16:20,066 --> 00:16:21,328
She already did.
402
00:16:21,371 --> 00:16:22,851
She could pick up the ribs.
403
00:16:22,894 --> 00:16:24,635
She could pay for them
and put 'em on a plane.
404
00:16:24,679 --> 00:16:26,072
-I'd send her a check.
-You're hallucinating.
405
00:16:26,115 --> 00:16:27,421
I haven't seen her in years.
406
00:16:27,464 --> 00:16:28,726
It was a one-night stand.
407
00:16:29,901 --> 00:16:31,773
No, it was a two-night.
408
00:16:31,816 --> 00:16:34,515
No, I think it was three.
409
00:16:34,558 --> 00:16:36,996
Radar, prepare finger.
Ready to dial.
410
00:16:40,477 --> 00:16:42,044
Hello.
411
00:16:42,088 --> 00:16:44,003
Uh, yeah, Mildred Feeney?
412
00:16:44,046 --> 00:16:46,048
Uh, right. Hold on. Go.
413
00:16:47,658 --> 00:16:49,356
Hi, Mildred?
414
00:16:49,399 --> 00:16:51,053
This is John McIntyre.
415
00:16:53,055 --> 00:16:54,926
That's right, Big John.
416
00:16:54,970 --> 00:16:56,276
Big John?
417
00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:58,104
Lucky.
418
00:16:58,147 --> 00:17:01,324
Look, honey, I know it's been
a lot of years, but, uh--
419
00:17:01,368 --> 00:17:03,196
No, I'm not actually
in Chicago now.
420
00:17:03,239 --> 00:17:04,762
Little bit west of there.
421
00:17:04,806 --> 00:17:07,069
I'm in Korea, to be exact.
422
00:17:07,113 --> 00:17:08,766
Well, I got called up
into the war,
423
00:17:08,810 --> 00:17:11,334
and, uh, I got to
thinkin' about you.
424
00:17:11,378 --> 00:17:13,075
What?
425
00:17:13,119 --> 00:17:15,208
The war, Mildred.
426
00:17:15,251 --> 00:17:16,644
The war!
427
00:17:16,687 --> 00:17:19,168
[imitating bomb exploding]
428
00:17:19,212 --> 00:17:20,648
Come on, you guys,
take it easy.
429
00:17:20,691 --> 00:17:22,389
You're worse than
the real thing.
430
00:17:22,432 --> 00:17:24,826
-Lay it on her, will ya?
-What, baby?
431
00:17:24,869 --> 00:17:27,133
Me? Married? Married?
432
00:17:27,176 --> 00:17:28,786
Of course I'm not
married, Mildred.
433
00:17:28,830 --> 00:17:30,223
-Come on.
-Who could follow you?
434
00:17:30,266 --> 00:17:31,267
Cut it out.
435
00:17:31,311 --> 00:17:32,529
We could
lose this line.
436
00:17:32,573 --> 00:17:34,531
Lay it on her, will ya?
437
00:17:34,575 --> 00:17:37,186
Uh, honey, look.
I want you to do me a favor.
438
00:17:37,230 --> 00:17:40,581
There's a package
under the name of Pierce
439
00:17:40,624 --> 00:17:42,583
at a place called Adam's Ribs
440
00:17:42,626 --> 00:17:44,889
next to the Dearborn
Street Station.
441
00:17:44,933 --> 00:17:46,674
I want you to go in there
and pay for it,
442
00:17:46,717 --> 00:17:49,894
and take it to the M.P.s
at Midway Airport.
443
00:17:49,938 --> 00:17:52,114
Yeah, I'll send you
a check for it.
444
00:17:52,158 --> 00:17:56,640
Uh, mark the package
"Dr. B.F. Pierce.
445
00:17:56,684 --> 00:18:00,383
"4077 MASH, Korea.
446
00:18:00,427 --> 00:18:03,212
Rush: Medical Supplies."
447
00:18:03,256 --> 00:18:04,605
What?
448
00:18:04,648 --> 00:18:06,520
It's ribs and sauce.
449
00:18:06,563 --> 00:18:09,000
-Yeah, we use 'em for, uh...
-Anatomy practice.
450
00:18:09,044 --> 00:18:11,307
Anatomy practice, right.
451
00:18:11,351 --> 00:18:14,136
Well, they don't allow us
to work on real people.
452
00:18:14,180 --> 00:18:15,746
The sauce?
453
00:18:15,790 --> 00:18:19,663
Well, uh, they don't let us
use real blood, either.
454
00:18:19,707 --> 00:18:21,491
You understand?
455
00:18:21,535 --> 00:18:23,711
Boy, she's smart.
456
00:18:23,754 --> 00:18:26,366
Thanks a lot, Mildred.
Right, honey.
457
00:18:26,409 --> 00:18:28,585
-Bye-bye.
-Come on, come on.
458
00:18:28,629 --> 00:18:30,370
Mildred, I can't keep
the war on hold.
459
00:18:30,413 --> 00:18:32,154
I gotta go. Bye-bye.
460
00:18:33,938 --> 00:18:35,505
Ha ha!
461
00:18:35,549 --> 00:18:37,116
-Radar.
-Yeah?
462
00:18:37,159 --> 00:18:39,379
Wire the M.P.s
at Midway Airport.
463
00:18:39,422 --> 00:18:40,771
Tell 'em that
the package is for
464
00:18:40,815 --> 00:18:41,990
Captain Benjamin
Franklin Pierce.
465
00:18:42,033 --> 00:18:43,339
Yeah-yeah.
466
00:18:43,383 --> 00:18:45,515
General MacArthur's
personal physician.
467
00:18:45,559 --> 00:18:47,169
MacArthur. Wow.
468
00:18:47,213 --> 00:18:49,215
I've never been in
the stockade before.
469
00:18:49,258 --> 00:18:51,739
Then wire the, uh, Military
Air Transport Service.
470
00:18:51,782 --> 00:18:53,697
-A.P.O. San Francisco.
-"A.P.O"...
471
00:18:53,741 --> 00:18:55,830
Tell 'em it's urgent.
Critical medical supplies.
472
00:18:55,873 --> 00:18:58,833
-"Critical"...
-Handle with Care.
Highly Infectious.
473
00:18:58,876 --> 00:19:00,922
Uh, mark it
"Quickest possible.
474
00:19:00,965 --> 00:19:03,185
Do not spill.
Keep refrigerated."
475
00:19:03,229 --> 00:19:05,144
Way to go, Big John.
476
00:19:13,804 --> 00:19:15,545
Sir. Wake up, sir.
477
00:19:15,589 --> 00:19:16,894
The spareribs are here.
478
00:19:16,938 --> 00:19:18,418
Where? Where?
479
00:19:18,461 --> 00:19:20,985
They're in a supply
depot down in Ouijongbu.
480
00:19:21,029 --> 00:19:22,509
Uh, they're hung up
in channels.
481
00:19:22,552 --> 00:19:23,814
Who hung 'em?
482
00:19:23,858 --> 00:19:26,643
Well, I talked
to a Major Pfiefer.
483
00:19:26,687 --> 00:19:28,645
He wouldn't even talk to me
when I talked to him.
484
00:19:28,689 --> 00:19:29,907
What'd he say?
What'd he say?
485
00:19:29,951 --> 00:19:31,692
He started with,
uh, "Drop dead,"
486
00:19:31,735 --> 00:19:33,998
and then he got rude!
487
00:19:34,042 --> 00:19:36,697
We'll get him, even if we
have to call Klinger's uncle.
488
00:19:38,046 --> 00:19:40,048
-Trap.
-Mildred...
489
00:19:40,091 --> 00:19:43,269
Wake up. Me and the ribs,
we're all in Korea!
490
00:19:43,312 --> 00:19:44,357
Let's eat!
491
00:19:47,969 --> 00:19:49,623
Come on, Dan.
It's on the way to Seoul!
492
00:19:49,666 --> 00:19:52,539
No room. I gotta take
this kid down for X-ray.
493
00:19:52,582 --> 00:19:55,063
Unless you wanna use
the rumble seats.
494
00:19:55,106 --> 00:19:57,196
-Okay, you got it!
-Gimme your hand.
495
00:19:57,239 --> 00:19:58,849
Climb under.
496
00:19:58,893 --> 00:20:00,895
Watch your head.
Okay, get him in.
497
00:20:25,136 --> 00:20:26,964
"4077 MASH."
498
00:20:27,008 --> 00:20:29,967
Oh, yes, talked to some cocky
little nurse at your outfit.
499
00:20:30,011 --> 00:20:31,273
Radar.
500
00:20:31,317 --> 00:20:33,797
Tried to muscle me
on the phone.
501
00:20:33,841 --> 00:20:35,886
She's a tough
little cookie.
502
00:20:35,930 --> 00:20:38,541
There it is. "One box,
medical supplies.
503
00:20:38,585 --> 00:20:40,978
Marked urgent." Figures.
504
00:20:41,022 --> 00:20:42,893
We're doctors.
We need that stuff, Major.
505
00:20:42,937 --> 00:20:44,068
It's important.
506
00:20:44,112 --> 00:20:46,375
Yeah, it's a new
wonder drug.
507
00:20:47,811 --> 00:20:49,683
Top shelf.
508
00:20:53,034 --> 00:20:54,470
Keep those code numbers
to the front
509
00:20:54,514 --> 00:20:55,950
so we can read them.
510
00:20:55,993 --> 00:20:58,735
Oh, sorry. It's only
our first day on the job.
511
00:20:58,779 --> 00:21:00,171
What about our package?
512
00:21:00,215 --> 00:21:02,130
You know what I've
got to process?
513
00:21:02,173 --> 00:21:04,785
Twelve Sherman tanks,
2,000 blankets,
514
00:21:04,828 --> 00:21:07,309
100,000 rolls of toilet paper,
515
00:21:07,353 --> 00:21:09,920
A trainload of
semiautomatic corn poppers,
516
00:21:09,964 --> 00:21:11,487
and baby A-bomb components.
517
00:21:11,531 --> 00:21:13,054
They're delicious
with popcorn.
518
00:21:13,097 --> 00:21:14,969
Whatever it is,
I've got it.
519
00:21:15,012 --> 00:21:16,362
And you want me to find
520
00:21:16,405 --> 00:21:18,668
one insignificant little
box of med supplies.
521
00:21:20,061 --> 00:21:22,063
We sometimes use
them in our work.
522
00:21:22,106 --> 00:21:25,632
You think because you
save lives, it's important.
523
00:21:25,675 --> 00:21:27,808
Move this over there.
524
00:21:27,851 --> 00:21:28,809
Sure.
525
00:21:30,506 --> 00:21:32,029
Another box of hernias, huh?
526
00:21:32,073 --> 00:21:33,335
[grunting, sighing]
527
00:21:33,379 --> 00:21:36,425
Major, you're not
gonna cooperate, huh?
528
00:21:36,469 --> 00:21:39,602
If I help one person,
I have to help everybody.
529
00:21:39,646 --> 00:21:43,040
You can't run a war
on cooperation.
530
00:21:43,084 --> 00:21:45,347
All right, fine.
We'll go up the line.
531
00:21:45,391 --> 00:21:47,523
-Who's your boss?
-My sergeant.
532
00:21:47,567 --> 00:21:49,438
-Where is he?
-Look, he's very busy,
533
00:21:49,482 --> 00:21:50,700
and I don't
want him upset.
534
00:21:50,744 --> 00:21:52,876
We're not
gonna upset him.
535
00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:55,226
He's over in Admin.
Sergeant Tarola.
536
00:21:55,270 --> 00:21:57,228
Please don't tell him
I sent you.
537
00:21:57,272 --> 00:21:59,318
Thank you, Major. You've
been a tower of Jell-O.
538
00:22:00,884 --> 00:22:03,409
Nobody cut requisition
orders on this.
539
00:22:03,452 --> 00:22:05,193
Emergency medical
shipment, Sergeant.
540
00:22:05,236 --> 00:22:08,022
Yeah, there's no
S47-19J accompanying.
541
00:22:08,065 --> 00:22:10,372
I told you we should've got
an S47-19J accompanying,
542
00:22:10,416 --> 00:22:11,678
but you wouldn't listen.
543
00:22:11,721 --> 00:22:12,896
That's necessary?
544
00:22:12,940 --> 00:22:14,898
Necessary?
545
00:22:14,942 --> 00:22:16,291
We don't go to
latrine around here
546
00:22:16,335 --> 00:22:18,511
without an S47-19J.
547
00:22:18,554 --> 00:22:19,860
Sorry.
548
00:22:23,733 --> 00:22:25,474
You know, I wasn't
gonna say anything,
549
00:22:25,518 --> 00:22:26,823
but this little
supermarket of yours here
550
00:22:26,867 --> 00:22:28,999
-isn't all that clean.
-Yeah.
551
00:22:29,043 --> 00:22:32,481
Ideal breeding environment
for cholera, the plague.
552
00:22:32,525 --> 00:22:34,396
You're kidding.
553
00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:36,616
You always sweat in
40 degree temperature?
554
00:22:36,659 --> 00:22:39,227
-I'm not sweating.
-You should be.
555
00:22:39,270 --> 00:22:41,229
Nothin' wrong with me.
I feel sensational.
556
00:22:41,272 --> 00:22:43,710
Ah, there it is.
Say that again, will ya?
557
00:22:45,015 --> 00:22:46,582
I feel sensational?
558
00:22:46,626 --> 00:22:48,671
Definite slurring
of the S.
559
00:22:48,715 --> 00:22:50,281
Classic early symptom.
560
00:22:50,325 --> 00:22:52,458
Followed by the eyes blinking
561
00:22:52,501 --> 00:22:54,024
-in an up-and-down motion.
-Mm-hmm.
562
00:22:54,068 --> 00:22:55,330
You know, if there's
plague here,
563
00:22:55,374 --> 00:22:56,723
we'll have to
close the place.
564
00:22:56,766 --> 00:22:58,246
Post it as
a contagious area.
565
00:22:58,289 --> 00:22:59,769
Give you a chance
to be reassigned.
566
00:22:59,813 --> 00:23:01,249
You're probably
anxious to get up
567
00:23:01,292 --> 00:23:02,946
to the fighting war
anyway, aren't you?
568
00:23:06,341 --> 00:23:07,690
What's in the package?
569
00:23:09,997 --> 00:23:12,173
Spareribs and sauce
from Chicago.
570
00:23:13,957 --> 00:23:15,437
Adam's Ribs?
571
00:23:15,481 --> 00:23:17,396
You know?
572
00:23:17,439 --> 00:23:19,310
I'm from Joliet.
573
00:23:19,354 --> 00:23:21,487
I'd walk to Chicago
on my knees in the snow
574
00:23:21,530 --> 00:23:22,966
for a takeout order.
575
00:23:23,010 --> 00:23:24,925
He's one of you.
576
00:23:26,143 --> 00:23:28,276
-How many you got?
-40 pounds.
577
00:23:28,319 --> 00:23:30,409
I'll take 20
and a quart of sauce.
578
00:23:32,585 --> 00:23:34,543
10 and a pint of sauce.
579
00:23:34,587 --> 00:23:35,979
12 and a pint and a half.
580
00:23:36,023 --> 00:23:37,416
And coleslaw.
581
00:23:40,941 --> 00:23:43,073
We didn't order
any coleslaw.
582
00:23:44,335 --> 00:23:46,250
You sent all the way
to Chicago
583
00:23:46,294 --> 00:23:47,687
and no coleslaw?
584
00:23:49,819 --> 00:23:51,342
Forgive us.
We're draftees.
585
00:24:14,888 --> 00:24:15,932
Ah.
586
00:24:18,544 --> 00:24:21,460
[whistling]
587
00:24:25,551 --> 00:24:27,074
Shall we give thanks?
588
00:24:28,989 --> 00:24:31,034
Praise the Lord
and pass the sauce.
589
00:24:31,078 --> 00:24:33,254
MAN [on P.A.]: Attention,
all personnel. Attention.
590
00:24:33,297 --> 00:24:35,299
Ambulances
in the lower compound.
591
00:24:35,343 --> 00:24:36,953
Choppers on the upper pad.
592
00:24:36,997 --> 00:24:39,521
Incoming wounded.
Repeat, incoming wounded.
593
00:24:39,565 --> 00:24:41,654
All O.R. personnel
report on the double.
594
00:24:41,697 --> 00:24:43,177
-Come on!
-Repeat,
595
00:24:43,220 --> 00:24:44,526
ambulances
in the lower compound.
596
00:24:44,570 --> 00:24:45,527
-No!
-Choppers on the upper deck.
597
00:24:45,571 --> 00:24:46,963
No, that's not fair!
598
00:24:48,574 --> 00:24:50,010
-Come on.
-No, no, wait a minute!
599
00:24:50,053 --> 00:24:51,751
No, it's not fair!
We got ribs now!
600
00:24:51,794 --> 00:24:53,404
We got ribs from
Adam's Ribs in Chicago!
601
00:24:53,448 --> 00:24:54,797
We lied to Mildred
and everything!
602
00:24:54,841 --> 00:24:56,233
I had to send her a check!
603
00:24:56,277 --> 00:24:57,800
Let me have a rib.
One rib. One little--
604
00:24:57,844 --> 00:24:59,062
A riblet. A little rib.
605
00:25:04,590 --> 00:25:06,896
♪♪ [theme]
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