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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:12,913 (Frank)'Nobody's saying the Chatsworth Estate is the Garden of Eden. 2 00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,309 'At least l don't think they are. 3 00:00:15,400 --> 00:00:19,678 'But it's been a good home to us, to me, Frank Gallagher, 4 00:00:19,760 --> 00:00:21,955 'and me kids, who l'm proud of, 5 00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:26,158 'cos every single one of them reminds me a little of me. 6 00:00:27,840 --> 00:00:32,118 'They can all think for themselves, which they've me to thank for. 7 00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:36,233 'Fiona, who's a big help, a massive help. 8 00:00:36,320 --> 00:00:41,235 'Lip, who's a bit of a gobshite, which is why nobody calls him Phillip any more. 9 00:00:41,320 --> 00:00:45,916 'lan, a lot like his mam, which is handy for the others, cos she's disappeared, 10 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:47,433 'and good luck to her. 11 00:00:47,520 --> 00:00:50,637 'And Carl. We daren't let him grow his hair for two reasons - 12 00:00:50,720 --> 00:00:54,315 'one, it stands on end and makes him look like Toyah, two, nits love him. 13 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:58,552 'Debbie. Sent by God. Total angel. 14 00:00:58,640 --> 00:01:02,918 'You have to check your change but she'll always do you a favour. 15 00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:06,231 'Plus Liam! Little rock'n'roller! 16 00:01:06,320 --> 00:01:10,472 'Gonna be a star... once we've got the fits under control. 17 00:01:10,560 --> 00:01:14,872 'Three things, see, are vital to a half-decent community. 18 00:01:14,960 --> 00:01:20,239 'Space. You need wide-open spaces where everyone goes mental. 19 00:01:20,320 --> 00:01:24,711 'And neighbourliness. Fantastic neighbours. 20 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:25,835 (Fireworks whizz) 21 00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:29,799 'Kev and Veronica. Lend you anything. Well, not anything. 22 00:01:29,880 --> 00:01:33,839 'But all of them, to a man, know first and foremost 23 00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:37,230 'one of the most vital necessities in this life 24 00:01:37,320 --> 00:01:40,949 'is they know how to throw a party.' 25 00:01:41,040 --> 00:01:43,156 (Sirens) 26 00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:23,269 Hiya. l said l'd help your Karen with her homework. 27 00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:27,239 OK. Take your shoes off. 28 00:02:27,320 --> 00:02:30,278 - Fair enough. - l'll get you a carrier bag. 29 00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:41,750 She's got this thing about people bringing soil into the house. 30 00:02:41,840 --> 00:02:44,638 - Right. - She's not as mad as she seems. 31 00:02:44,720 --> 00:02:48,190 - Agoraphobia. - Oh, right. 32 00:02:48,280 --> 00:02:51,477 - So how come you know all this? - lt's just something l do. 33 00:02:51,560 --> 00:02:53,676 - What, like a hobby? - No. 34 00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:55,557 - The plans. - What, physics? 35 00:02:55,640 --> 00:03:00,953 All sorts. Look. l've got a great 'un for Newton's First. Watch. 36 00:03:01,040 --> 00:03:09,152 Every body continues in a state of rest or uniform motion 37 00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:11,993 unless acted upon by an external... 38 00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:14,389 - (Zip unzips) - ..force. 39 00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:17,956 - Karen! - Hello. 40 00:03:18,040 --> 00:03:20,110 Don't do... Look, Karen! 41 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:22,236 To be honest, l could do with the money. 42 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:25,551 - What money? - l charge for homework. 43 00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:27,870 l'm skint. 44 00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:31,672 OK. 45 00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:36,038 (Whispers) Fuck! 46 00:03:43,720 --> 00:03:47,110 - Have you got any deodorant? - Erm... 47 00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:49,270 l'm using lan's. 48 00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:53,831 lf l stick this lot in the washer before l go out, will you keep an eye on it? 49 00:03:53,920 --> 00:03:56,639 - Do it tomorrow. - God, it stinks in here. 50 00:03:56,720 --> 00:03:59,712 - lt's the T-shirt l'm in. - That's why it stinks. 51 00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:02,268 - You three are like chimps. - (Veronica) Fiona! 52 00:04:02,360 --> 00:04:04,271 We need to go if we're gonna get a lift. 53 00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:07,272 (Fiona) Give us five minutes, Veronica. 54 00:04:35,840 --> 00:04:37,717 (Door slams) 55 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:40,794 Hiya. 56 00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:51,712 (Techno music) 57 00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:09,436 Oi! 58 00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:10,919 Excuse me! 59 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:13,833 - He's got me bag! - Excuse me. 60 00:05:13,920 --> 00:05:16,673 - Move! - Oi! He's got me bag! 61 00:05:18,160 --> 00:05:19,639 Move, move, move! 62 00:05:27,440 --> 00:05:29,635 Bastard! 63 00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:32,272 (Tyres squeal) 64 00:05:32,360 --> 00:05:34,112 Look, l'm sorry. 65 00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:37,954 l know you missed but that were top fucking notch. 66 00:05:38,040 --> 00:05:41,032 Steve. l was gonna offer to buy you a drink anyway. 67 00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:44,799 - Were you now? - Yeah, l was, actually. 68 00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:49,270 - What do you reckon, Veronica? - l don't know. Do l get one? 69 00:05:49,360 --> 00:05:51,715 Yeah, l think you will. 70 00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:55,679 - Snake bites all round, yeah? - Maybe. 71 00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:58,957 No, no, no. You're not getting back in like that. 72 00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:00,951 - What? - Look at the state of him. 73 00:06:01,040 --> 00:06:04,350 State of you. lf you were doing your job, he wouldn't have had to. 74 00:06:04,440 --> 00:06:07,318 - You fat twat. - You're barred. 75 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,470 - What for? - Er...drugs. 76 00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:14,596 - He let them get away. - Watch your mouth, spunk face. 77 00:06:14,680 --> 00:06:17,114 - Don't talk to her like that. - Or what? 78 00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:19,270 Forget it. Let's get a taxi. 79 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:23,872 - Thanks. - Thanks anyway. 80 00:06:27,600 --> 00:06:29,352 (Both scream) 81 00:06:33,240 --> 00:06:36,755 - Come on! - You fat wanker! 82 00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:46,834 (Lip) l got a blowjob today. 83 00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:50,594 What have you been told about encouraging pets? 84 00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:55,435 - Karen Jackson. - Yeah, right, Lip. 85 00:06:55,520 --> 00:06:58,956 She's desperate to get physics. l didn't ask. 86 00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:01,634 l didn't even know until she yanked it out. 87 00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:10,709 You'd have told me straightaway if you would have been noshed. 88 00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:13,519 You ever had yours sucked? 89 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:16,433 Well...once or twice. 90 00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:19,476 Didn't hear you telling me. 91 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:24,111 How come, lan? A breakthrough like that, if we tell each other everything... 92 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,510 Unless you got it sucked by a bloke. 93 00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:50,796 (Sobs) 94 00:07:50,880 --> 00:07:54,429 What was it he called you? A spunky monkey or something. 95 00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:58,718 lt wasn't me he called spunk face. lt was her. l'm more of a juice face. 96 00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:01,553 - Not in front of the kids, mate. - They've heard worse. 97 00:08:01,640 --> 00:08:06,156 - l get it off them. - (Steve) Here's the spunky monkey. 98 00:08:06,240 --> 00:08:11,473 l nearly wet meself when you whacked that guy. Well, l did a bit. 99 00:08:11,560 --> 00:08:13,994 He'll kill you if ever he sees you, Steve. 100 00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:15,957 Yeah? 101 00:08:17,280 --> 00:08:20,477 - How many people live here? - l'm next door but one. 102 00:08:20,560 --> 00:08:23,791 But next door's dead so l'm, erm...next door. 103 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:26,553 - Yeah? Are you a nurse, Veronica? - Er...part time. 104 00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:28,995 - (Fiona) You lying cow. - She's a cleaner. 105 00:08:29,080 --> 00:08:32,390 (Veronica) They asked me to train twice, at least. 106 00:08:32,480 --> 00:08:35,358 (Fiona) Just before they sacked you for thieving. 107 00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:38,398 lf you're using stolen goods, l'm on the blower. 108 00:08:38,480 --> 00:08:40,869 Will you shut up! You don't even know him! 109 00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:42,837 Sit still. 110 00:08:42,920 --> 00:08:45,912 l would do if you stopped nudging me with your knockers. 111 00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:49,269 - Argh, Jesus! - Sit still! 112 00:08:49,360 --> 00:08:51,590 l'm Steve, by the way. 113 00:08:51,680 --> 00:08:53,989 Debbie. 114 00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:56,752 - Lip. - Carl. 115 00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:59,274 - And that's lan. - Hi, lan. 116 00:08:59,360 --> 00:09:01,396 Hey, Debbie, why do they call him Lip? 117 00:09:01,480 --> 00:09:04,233 A- you stink, B- you're not as funny as you think, 118 00:09:04,320 --> 00:09:07,312 C- you whacked a bouncer so you'll be dead soon. 119 00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:10,597 - (Debbie) Stuff like that. - Yeah, boy meets death wish. 120 00:09:10,680 --> 00:09:13,478 We-hey! l thought you were fetching an lndian home. 121 00:09:13,560 --> 00:09:15,915 l couldn't be arsed so l found a tax payer. 122 00:09:17,840 --> 00:09:19,831 - What's going on? - We got turfed out. 123 00:09:19,920 --> 00:09:23,151 Steve stuck up for us. Decked a bouncer. 124 00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:26,596 - Which bouncer? - Jimmy Clifton. 125 00:09:26,680 --> 00:09:28,033 Fuck me. 126 00:09:28,120 --> 00:09:30,076 (Fiona) Come on, you lot. Off to bed. 127 00:09:31,920 --> 00:09:34,514 - Bed. - (Steve) Night, kids. See you later. 128 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:36,750 - Bye! - See you, love. 129 00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:47,716 - That's his? - Yeah. Well, work's. 130 00:09:47,800 --> 00:09:51,509 - What kind of work? - Car sales. 131 00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:54,558 - Where? - l don't know. Didn't ask. 132 00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:56,471 l'm not as nosy as you. 133 00:09:56,560 --> 00:09:59,791 Oh, right. But you didn't mind watching him take his shirt off. 134 00:09:59,880 --> 00:10:03,714 No. And if you hadn't walked in l'd have tripped him up and dived under. 135 00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:05,756 Phwoargh! (Giggles) 136 00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:28,275 Right, straight answer. 137 00:10:28,360 --> 00:10:32,512 lf l hadn't busted my skull for you, would you have looked twice? 138 00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:35,239 Who's saying l looked twice? 139 00:10:36,880 --> 00:10:39,110 You did then. 140 00:10:46,360 --> 00:10:48,396 l can't. 141 00:10:53,760 --> 00:10:58,675 99%/% of this world's problems are caused by little words that come in pairs. 142 00:11:01,040 --> 00:11:04,112 We're healthy and we're happy 143 00:11:04,200 --> 00:11:08,716 and yet when anybody asks us, we say, ''Not bad.'' 144 00:11:11,720 --> 00:11:17,078 When l saw you for the first time, dancing, about a month ago, by the way, 145 00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,993 l was desperate to buy you a drink. 146 00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:26,918 But you know what l said to myself? ''l can't. She won't. We wouldn't.'' 147 00:11:28,680 --> 00:11:33,071 And then you're there again tonight and me getting a second chance 148 00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:35,196 to make a good impression. 149 00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:38,829 So you say stop and l'll stop. 150 00:11:54,560 --> 00:11:56,516 Slower. 151 00:12:34,400 --> 00:12:37,597 Oh, yeah! Nearly! Nearly! 152 00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:44,115 - (Knocking) - Shit! 153 00:12:44,200 --> 00:12:45,918 Shit! 154 00:13:03,640 --> 00:13:06,950 - Fiona in? - Yeah. Er...yeah, she's upstairs. 155 00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:12,390 l'll just go get her. 156 00:13:17,680 --> 00:13:20,638 - Police. - l know. l'll sort it. 157 00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:26,637 (Shouting) Go away! 158 00:13:26,720 --> 00:13:29,598 (Girl) Come here, Liam. Back to bed. 159 00:13:38,040 --> 00:13:42,079 l wouldn't put him anywhere near a carpet until his kecks dry off a bit. 160 00:13:45,640 --> 00:13:48,518 (Steve) What the fuck's that? (Fiona) lt's me dad. 161 00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:56,835 Thanks, Tony. l appreciate it. 162 00:13:56,920 --> 00:14:00,356 Cheers, Fiona. Night. 163 00:14:07,720 --> 00:14:10,871 - Hey, do you want a hand? - No, you're all right. 164 00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:27,992 Do you, erm... do you leave him there all night? 165 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:30,799 He's never there when l get up. 166 00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:35,755 Who's the little 'un? Liam? 167 00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:38,956 Brother. 168 00:15:59,280 --> 00:16:01,999 (Knock at door, washing machine spinning) 169 00:16:11,160 --> 00:16:13,230 (Steve) Hiya. 170 00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:17,108 Listen, erm... l'm wondering how you're fixed for Friday. 171 00:16:18,160 --> 00:16:20,355 - Party. - Great. 172 00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:23,113 - You wouldn't get invited. - ls it a hen do? 173 00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:25,589 lt's just not that kind of party. 174 00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:28,672 Look, Steve, you're not that desperate. 175 00:16:28,760 --> 00:16:32,469 - Wanting to see you again is desperate? - Feeling like you have to. 176 00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:36,349 You could get laid anywhere. 177 00:16:36,440 --> 00:16:39,432 So l'm only here for a fuck? 178 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:41,511 Never crossed your mind? 179 00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:46,229 This is all a bit Hans Christian Andersen. 180 00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:50,829 You see, you think you find your dream girl, 181 00:16:50,920 --> 00:16:53,593 then her incontinent alcoholic father wrecks it. 182 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:57,070 - Don't take the piss. - Don't pretend you don't even know me. 183 00:16:57,160 --> 00:16:59,230 You weren't that drunk. 184 00:17:00,840 --> 00:17:05,277 lf the only reason last night happened was because it happened, 185 00:17:05,360 --> 00:17:07,555 don't knock it, all right? 186 00:17:07,640 --> 00:17:09,710 At least something did. 187 00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:13,709 lt did for me. 188 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:16,598 - Hey, it's the smart arse. - Hey, it's the loser. 189 00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:19,638 - No school today? - Two teeth out this morning. 190 00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:22,234 lf you're chewing, don't just do it on one side. 191 00:17:22,320 --> 00:17:25,835 That can bugger your jaw and that'll change the way you walk. 192 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:28,150 - ls that a fact? - lt's a skeletal fact. 193 00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:32,392 lf you talk out of your arse, you'll need a bigger toothbrush. Anal fact. 194 00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:34,436 Cheers. 195 00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:37,117 Lip. 196 00:17:42,840 --> 00:17:45,274 (Machine restarts) 197 00:17:47,280 --> 00:17:49,589 Look... 198 00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:52,795 Thanks about the bag. 199 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:57,550 - And stuff. - (Steve laughs) 200 00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:01,633 - Stuff? - l'm just not looking, Steve. 201 00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:09,235 l'm not having this. 202 00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:13,598 Look, just once, for me, then l swear l'll shut up about everything. 203 00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:16,672 Swear though, Lip, then. 204 00:18:16,760 --> 00:18:19,194 Just try it. You might like it. 205 00:18:22,280 --> 00:18:24,157 Oh, she's thrilled with you. 206 00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:26,674 She got an A for her physics. 207 00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:29,558 Karen, it's your little helper! 208 00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:32,598 l'll get you carrier bags. 209 00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:44,118 (Man) Right, l'm off. 210 00:18:45,120 --> 00:18:49,159 Oh, hiya, lads. Where's our Karen? 211 00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:52,994 Out looking for a felt tip. 212 00:18:58,120 --> 00:19:00,839 Guess. 213 00:19:00,920 --> 00:19:03,195 - Tuna. - Nope. 214 00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:05,430 - Corned beef. - Nope. 215 00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,715 Kiss and l'll tell. 216 00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:11,678 l'll find out what l've got when l eat 'em, won't l? 217 00:19:11,760 --> 00:19:15,799 Right, Karen, l'm late so l'm off. See you in the morning, sweetheart. 218 00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:35,317 What are you hiding for? 219 00:19:39,280 --> 00:19:41,589 What's she hiding for? 220 00:19:45,240 --> 00:19:48,391 Oh, Jesus Christ, no. 221 00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:50,471 No! 222 00:19:50,560 --> 00:19:52,391 (Screaming) 223 00:19:53,960 --> 00:19:57,236 - What? - He's gonna kill him! 224 00:19:59,840 --> 00:20:01,876 - He's gonna kill him! - Who? 225 00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:04,235 - (Crash and thud) - He's killed him. 226 00:20:12,760 --> 00:20:15,194 Come back here, you little animals! 227 00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:22,515 Round to ours. Top of the freezer. Two ice collars. 228 00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:24,795 - Don't drop 'em. They can split. - Right. 229 00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:27,792 Second cupboard above the sink - liquid ibuprofen. 230 00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:30,348 freeze spray and microthermal bandages. 231 00:20:30,440 --> 00:20:32,715 - Shouldn't he get it X-rayed? - Grow up. 232 00:20:32,800 --> 00:20:36,156 He'll be there till midnight. ''Submetatarsal haematoma.'' 233 00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:39,232 ''Yeah, cheers, we knew that five hours back.'' Fuck off. 234 00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:43,677 Microthermal bandages sizes eight and ten. Could need either so bring both. 235 00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:46,513 - Right. - And front bedroom, top of the video... 236 00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:49,160 - Yeah? - ..fags and lighter. 237 00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:55,151 - (Knocking) - l'm not here! 238 00:20:55,240 --> 00:20:57,151 Argh! 239 00:20:57,240 --> 00:20:59,754 Just say we're out or you've never heard of us. 240 00:20:59,840 --> 00:21:01,956 What have you done? 241 00:21:09,640 --> 00:21:11,631 Get back up the stairs. 242 00:21:16,120 --> 00:21:18,509 Can l get through here? 243 00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:20,636 - Hey? - Washer-dryer. 244 00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:22,517 Not me. 245 00:21:23,360 --> 00:21:27,035 - Gallagher, number 2? - Yeah. But it's not ours. 246 00:21:44,040 --> 00:21:46,349 Where the fuck are you going with them? 247 00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:50,592 - Veronica wants them. - Chuck us one over here. 248 00:22:08,320 --> 00:22:10,914 (Radio alarm) 249 00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:19,479 (Makes trumpet sound) 250 00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:24,196 Right. 251 00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:32,389 - l thought you'd no money. - We haven't. 252 00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:34,516 These were inside it. 253 00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:39,756 ''Steve.'' 254 00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:41,558 - No! - Yeah. 255 00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:44,154 - Who's Steve? - Other night. 256 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:46,196 - Never! - l know! 257 00:22:46,920 --> 00:22:48,876 - You haven't got a vase. - No. 258 00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:51,758 - Can l have them for doing Lip's leg? - No. 259 00:22:53,160 --> 00:22:55,469 Just button it and follow me, will you? 260 00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:58,233 - l am! Fucking hell. - Stop pulling it back. 261 00:22:58,320 --> 00:23:01,915 - l'm not pulling it back! - l'm taking the strain on it, aren't l? 262 00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:05,879 (Debbie) Lip! Watch how many l can do. Look. Look! 263 00:23:05,960 --> 00:23:10,511 15 years, l've done everything in my power to... What did l tell you? 264 00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:14,718 Sow and thou shalt reap. Well, she didn't reap that from me, did she? 265 00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:18,076 Reap what? What are you reaping now? 266 00:23:18,960 --> 00:23:22,589 Eddie, what if l try? Really try? 267 00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:24,910 Mum, don't beg him! 268 00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:27,309 lf the bastard can do this, he's not worth it. 269 00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:29,709 - You watch your mouth. - Get fucked! 270 00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:34,155 Don't try blaming me for this! 271 00:23:34,240 --> 00:23:37,073 You're your own worst enemies, you two. 272 00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:41,073 They say bad things come in threes. They don't. Twos. You twos. 273 00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:43,879 Now let me in or l'll tear this door off. 274 00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:45,951 (Karen) Sod off! 275 00:23:49,360 --> 00:23:51,715 (Mobile phone) 276 00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:58,995 (Fiona) 'How much have you paid for it?' 277 00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:01,878 Erm...l'm not gonna tell you that. 278 00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:05,316 'lt was a present so you'd remember my phone number.' 279 00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:08,039 Which obviously worked. 280 00:24:08,120 --> 00:24:11,874 Your washer-dryer's in the back yard. We don't want it, l don't need it. 281 00:24:11,960 --> 00:24:14,952 - So pick it up before it rots. - 'ls it?' 282 00:24:17,200 --> 00:24:20,510 - Well, no. - Did the guy connect it? 283 00:24:20,600 --> 00:24:22,397 Yes. 284 00:24:23,320 --> 00:24:26,949 - 'So it's working?' - Yes. 285 00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:30,991 So you've tried it. 286 00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:45,310 - Smell your breath. - Fuck off. 287 00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:49,236 - Pork scratchings. - No, it's not. 288 00:24:50,120 --> 00:24:52,156 They were mine. 289 00:24:52,240 --> 00:24:55,516 See? l wouldn't mind but scratchings aren't scratchings 290 00:24:55,600 --> 00:24:57,716 and they've never seen no pork. 291 00:24:57,800 --> 00:24:59,916 lan, l pay your wages. 292 00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:03,879 lf you catch him letting me down, you'd better be straight on the mobile. 293 00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:05,837 Message received. 294 00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:08,388 lf you're not at that mosque by midnight, 295 00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:10,675 you'll be in deep shit with your dad. 296 00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:15,197 - See you later, light of my life. - l mean it. We're all watching you. 297 00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:17,316 See you at home. 298 00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:22,237 Can you earn your money while you're taking the piss? 299 00:25:51,360 --> 00:25:53,999 Now you know what l feel like. 300 00:25:55,600 --> 00:25:57,909 Quit whingeing. 301 00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:01,869 Drink more. 302 00:26:01,960 --> 00:26:04,474 (Laughs) 303 00:26:17,200 --> 00:26:21,113 Mum, we've got to wear our shoes. There's bits of glass you can't see. 304 00:26:27,160 --> 00:26:29,799 - (Lip) Cheers. - Maybe Lip could do with a drink. 305 00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:35,308 Yes, sorry, Lip. lt's been a bit of an off day today, hasn't it, Karen? 306 00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:38,358 So. Vodka, some tonic. 307 00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:41,954 Plenty of rum but we're out of blackcurrant. 308 00:26:42,040 --> 00:26:44,076 - And gin. - Just coffee, Mum. 309 00:26:44,160 --> 00:26:47,630 - (Tearfully) And a few lagers. - Lager would be great. Cheers. 310 00:26:54,800 --> 00:26:58,031 - What if your dad comes back? - He won't. 311 00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:06,315 - That's my fault. - He's been looking for an excuse. 312 00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:10,590 Thanks. 313 00:27:13,040 --> 00:27:16,874 So, erm...what kind of impression did you get of lan? 314 00:27:16,960 --> 00:27:19,235 He seems nice. 315 00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:22,357 - Hard? - Couldn't tell. He didn't say much. 316 00:27:22,440 --> 00:27:24,351 No, l mean... 317 00:27:26,160 --> 00:27:29,675 - Did he get a hard-on? - No. 318 00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:53,836 (Panting and moaning) 319 00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:57,076 (Man) Shh! Shh! Shh! 320 00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:05,672 Count the crisps again, lan, and this time do it proper. 321 00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:09,150 And l'll do the peanuts, all right? Jeez! Lip. 322 00:28:09,240 --> 00:28:12,869 Just, er... Cheers for the tools, Kash. 323 00:28:12,960 --> 00:28:15,520 Any time, eh? So long as l get 'em back. 324 00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:18,717 - So orange juice. Let's count... - Two bottles. 325 00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:21,189 (Lip) Jesus Christ. 326 00:28:21,280 --> 00:28:23,748 Tell me you are taking the piss. 327 00:28:27,840 --> 00:28:30,559 You're fucking him? 328 00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:32,710 Him?! 329 00:28:36,120 --> 00:28:38,588 (Lip) Kash bought you the trainers, didn't he? 330 00:28:46,440 --> 00:28:49,273 He's married. With kids. 331 00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:54,154 - What else does he buy you? - Just stuff now and again. 332 00:28:57,240 --> 00:28:59,708 And you're happy with that? 333 00:29:00,680 --> 00:29:02,511 Eh? 334 00:29:04,240 --> 00:29:06,549 What does that make you? 335 00:29:06,640 --> 00:29:08,517 A fucking rent boy at best. 336 00:29:08,600 --> 00:29:12,149 Listen to me, bollock brains. You crack on you know everything. 337 00:29:12,240 --> 00:29:16,279 And you know what? Ask me what l've bought him. Go on. Ask me. 338 00:29:16,360 --> 00:29:19,591 Two Man United shirts, home and away, 339 00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:22,672 limited edition Beckham shin pads for Christmas. 340 00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:26,036 So what does that make you, Lip, eh? What does that make you? 341 00:29:26,120 --> 00:29:29,829 Wrong, that's what, you smart arse, short arse fuck. 342 00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:33,993 So go round there now and promise Kash you'll keep your mouth shut. 343 00:29:34,080 --> 00:29:37,675 Cos he's shitting himself and he's done nothing - understand? - 344 00:29:37,760 --> 00:29:40,035 absolutely fuck all to be sorry for. 345 00:29:42,040 --> 00:29:45,112 Fake Muslim cheats on white fundamentalist wife 346 00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:47,111 with gutless gay boy. 347 00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:51,515 Says more about United fans than it does about the rest of us. 348 00:29:57,600 --> 00:30:00,273 (Music drowns out conversation) 349 00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:47,875 - Tell me you haven't got a girl pregnant. - No danger. 350 00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:50,918 Not if that's all you end up being to your kids. 351 00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:58,271 - Did he give you your dinner money? - No, l'll pay it myself. 352 00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:00,351 No, you won't. 353 00:31:16,600 --> 00:31:18,511 There you go. 354 00:31:19,640 --> 00:31:22,791 You must be sick of having to think for everybody. 355 00:31:25,360 --> 00:31:28,272 At least l can, so it makes me feel wanted. 356 00:31:30,600 --> 00:31:33,353 lf the best you're aiming for is wanting to be wanted, 357 00:31:33,440 --> 00:31:37,115 you've a job for life with that clown, Fiona. 358 00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:42,111 Night. 359 00:31:59,560 --> 00:32:01,152 (Mobile phone) 360 00:32:11,840 --> 00:32:13,796 (Mobile phone continuing) 361 00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:21,594 - Hello. - What was l wearing? 362 00:32:21,680 --> 00:32:24,752 - 'Wearing?' - The first time you saw me. 363 00:32:26,840 --> 00:32:31,470 'You were wearing a pink top and black trousers. 364 00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:34,196 'Cropped black trousers. 365 00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:39,035 'And you had dangling earrings. Just one earring. 366 00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:41,395 'lt was a long, thin dazzler. 367 00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:47,396 'And you had your hair up in these little clips. These rosy clip things. 368 00:32:47,480 --> 00:32:51,268 'And you were dancing next to a red-haired girl in a green dress.' 369 00:32:51,360 --> 00:32:54,750 Gemma. Who's a lot better looking than l am. 370 00:32:54,840 --> 00:32:57,673 - 'You reckon?' - So why weren't you looking at her? 371 00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:02,557 Because you think like that and Gemma doesn't. 372 00:33:02,640 --> 00:33:06,918 Gemma's dancing for an audience and you're dancing like there's nobody there. 373 00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:12,879 Your life's not straightforward and a bit of that travels with you 374 00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:15,474 but you don't stop it showing. 375 00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:18,313 'You're not fake. You're not vain. 376 00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:20,675 'You're not lost so you don't need finding. 377 00:33:20,760 --> 00:33:23,513 'You're not trapped so you don't need springing. 378 00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:27,552 'This town belongs to the fucking Gemmas of this world 379 00:33:27,640 --> 00:33:30,996 'and l'm sick of the fucking sight of them.' 380 00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:35,392 'l swear to God, Fiona, you're just... You make me want to enjoy my life.' 381 00:33:37,160 --> 00:33:39,549 l've lost mates because l talk too much. 382 00:33:39,640 --> 00:33:44,350 But every time l try the opposite l get accused of sulking so... 383 00:33:44,440 --> 00:33:47,432 Are you still there? Hello? Hello? 384 00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:49,670 Hello? 385 00:34:10,840 --> 00:34:12,512 (Steve) l knew you'd come. 386 00:34:12,600 --> 00:34:15,353 People like you are used to getting your own way. 387 00:34:15,440 --> 00:34:17,590 Who are people like me? 388 00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:21,279 All right, agree or disagree. 389 00:34:22,560 --> 00:34:26,633 - He thinks the sun shines out his arse. - Agree. 390 00:34:26,720 --> 00:34:29,871 - He's overgenerous and that bugs me. - Agree. 391 00:34:29,960 --> 00:34:33,236 Because l'm not used to being spoiled. 392 00:34:33,320 --> 00:34:35,151 Agree. 393 00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:40,312 Nevertheless, he's overeducated and he's got more money than sense. 394 00:34:40,400 --> 00:34:43,073 - Your words, not mine. - But they fit. 395 00:34:43,840 --> 00:34:44,909 Agree. 396 00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:48,072 - He's had an easy life. - Definitely. 397 00:34:48,160 --> 00:34:50,628 And l prefer a bloke who's been around a bit. 398 00:34:50,720 --> 00:34:52,312 Maybe. 399 00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:55,870 - l can't help my upbringing. - l'm not apologising for mine. 400 00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:58,474 Was l asking you to? 401 00:34:58,560 --> 00:35:01,120 - (Waitress) Finished? - No. 402 00:35:02,240 --> 00:35:04,879 No, we're working on it. 403 00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:07,678 Please. 404 00:35:07,760 --> 00:35:10,638 Do you want to wait outside while l take care of the bill? 405 00:35:10,720 --> 00:35:12,995 You can smoke there. 406 00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:15,394 Sure. 407 00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:19,111 Can l borrow your lighter? 408 00:35:26,680 --> 00:35:29,319 - Time to get your jacket, sir? - Mm. 409 00:35:30,840 --> 00:35:32,432 Yeah, it is. 410 00:35:38,960 --> 00:35:40,313 (Classical music) 411 00:35:46,160 --> 00:35:48,799 Mr and Mrs Pace. You all right? 412 00:35:48,880 --> 00:35:51,838 How are you? Lovely to have you back again. 413 00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:53,672 - Enjoy your meal. - Thank you. 414 00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:09,116 (Mobile phone) 415 00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:22,116 Hello. 416 00:36:22,200 --> 00:36:25,078 (Steve) 'You seem a bit confused about how l pay my way. 417 00:36:25,160 --> 00:36:29,517 'Well, you're the last person in the world l need to confuse so here we go. 418 00:36:29,600 --> 00:36:34,037 'l don't buy and sell cars, l just sell them. 419 00:36:34,120 --> 00:36:37,351 'But they're not mine. 420 00:36:37,440 --> 00:36:39,670 'Satisfied?' 421 00:36:41,120 --> 00:36:43,076 No. 422 00:36:43,160 --> 00:36:47,551 They're really nice. They're really old. They'll be dead soon. 423 00:36:47,640 --> 00:36:51,394 Look, he has beef, gets blind drunk and swears a lot. 424 00:36:52,360 --> 00:36:54,555 'She can't drive so he tears home pissed.' 425 00:36:55,480 --> 00:36:59,519 l'll be doing everybody a favour by just taking them off the road. 426 00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:02,592 'Come on. Do you fancy a laugh or not, Fiona?' 427 00:37:04,800 --> 00:37:06,836 This car's mine. 428 00:37:36,400 --> 00:37:39,233 Sounds like they're all in bed. 429 00:37:42,840 --> 00:37:44,478 Gotcha. 430 00:37:46,600 --> 00:37:49,319 Who's been eating my porridge, then? 431 00:37:51,360 --> 00:37:53,191 Hiya, Dad. 432 00:37:53,280 --> 00:37:55,236 - This is Steve. - We've met but you... 433 00:37:55,320 --> 00:37:58,471 - How much do you weigh? - Wouldn't know. 434 00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:01,552 - That'd fit me. - lgnore him. 435 00:38:02,880 --> 00:38:04,996 Shift! 436 00:38:12,040 --> 00:38:15,077 Listen, l better get off and let you get to bed, all right? 437 00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:27,310 Thanks. 438 00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:29,630 That was really nice. 439 00:38:29,720 --> 00:38:31,836 You too. 440 00:38:40,400 --> 00:38:43,437 What l want to know... 441 00:38:43,520 --> 00:38:48,230 Who...signed...for this? 442 00:39:00,480 --> 00:39:03,074 - What the fuck's he on? - l think he bought Es. 443 00:39:03,160 --> 00:39:06,675 The only dealer he gets credit from is a registered schizophrenic. 444 00:39:10,760 --> 00:39:14,958 lt's not a case of whether l agree, Steve. lt's a fact. 445 00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:17,793 - lf l was a single parent... - Aren't you? 446 00:39:17,880 --> 00:39:19,950 Yeah, but if l had tits. 447 00:39:20,040 --> 00:39:24,272 Yeah, but if l had tits, Steve, they'd double the money. 448 00:39:24,360 --> 00:39:28,319 - With a bloke they don't fucking know. - l get it, Frank, l get it. 449 00:39:28,400 --> 00:39:31,597 - lt's ''Prove you're looking for work.'' - And the rest. 450 00:39:31,680 --> 00:39:35,389 What was World War ll about if blokes like me are still getting shit? 451 00:39:35,480 --> 00:39:38,756 Not ''How's a guy supposed to find work with kids this age?'' 452 00:39:39,680 --> 00:39:41,910 Correct. Hello! 453 00:39:42,720 --> 00:39:45,280 Oh! Good show. Well done. 454 00:39:45,360 --> 00:39:49,239 - Cos her mum, God rest her soul... - Dad, don't start. 455 00:39:49,320 --> 00:39:51,595 Cos she'd better be dead, the cunt. 456 00:39:51,680 --> 00:39:55,559 - Cut it out! - A four-month-old baby, Steve. 457 00:39:55,640 --> 00:39:58,029 A 16-year-old girl, just had her appendix out. 458 00:39:58,120 --> 00:40:02,716 1 1-year-old Lip, 10-year-old lan, 7-year-old, 5-year-old. 459 00:40:02,800 --> 00:40:06,031 Oh, and an Escort van, calypso blue. 460 00:40:07,240 --> 00:40:09,435 What's the one thing we needed? 461 00:40:09,520 --> 00:40:11,988 One word. One thing. 462 00:40:12,080 --> 00:40:15,436 - Sterilisation. - Continuity. 463 00:40:15,520 --> 00:40:17,078 Continuity. 464 00:40:17,160 --> 00:40:20,789 One Tuesday, right, we're out of bread, so l send her down the shops. 465 00:40:20,880 --> 00:40:22,677 She grabs the van keys. 466 00:40:24,600 --> 00:40:29,799 l haven't seen it since. And we haven't a fucking clue where she is, have we? 467 00:40:29,880 --> 00:40:33,270 Eh? We... Oh, l fucking love this. 468 00:40:33,360 --> 00:40:36,591 (Turns up the music volume) 469 00:40:37,640 --> 00:40:40,871 So what could l do, Steve? What could l do? 470 00:40:40,960 --> 00:40:43,235 Vanish for three weeks. 471 00:40:43,320 --> 00:40:46,710 - l had a breakdown. - (Fiona) You went on a bender. 472 00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:48,950 l had a nervous breakdown. 473 00:40:49,040 --> 00:40:50,837 Fair enough. 474 00:40:50,920 --> 00:40:53,195 - (Knocking) - Dad. 475 00:40:53,280 --> 00:40:54,918 Keys. 476 00:41:12,800 --> 00:41:14,916 - Do you know what time it is? - lt's Frank. 477 00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:17,116 - What have l told you? - Oi! 478 00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:21,830 (Frank) Eh! Here we go. Neighbours of Satan. 479 00:41:21,920 --> 00:41:25,310 The day you pay rent, like some of us, Frank, 480 00:41:25,400 --> 00:41:27,595 you can play whatever shit you want. 481 00:41:27,680 --> 00:41:31,229 But till then, if you're pumpin' it at this time of night, 482 00:41:31,320 --> 00:41:34,392 you play stuff that we like. 483 00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:36,837 All right? 484 00:41:36,920 --> 00:41:39,070 - Do you get it? - l get it. 485 00:41:47,080 --> 00:41:48,991 Go on, get that down you. 486 00:42:15,120 --> 00:42:17,714 (Loud music and raucous laughter) 487 00:42:20,120 --> 00:42:22,395 He made me follow you up. 488 00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:24,357 l know. 489 00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:27,668 But he's right. You can't drive now. 490 00:42:30,640 --> 00:42:32,392 But... 491 00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:37,638 Liam is in here somewhere. 492 00:42:39,560 --> 00:42:41,835 Don't the kids wake up? 493 00:42:43,600 --> 00:42:45,750 Would you? 494 00:43:02,520 --> 00:43:04,476 (Car alarm) 495 00:43:10,240 --> 00:43:12,515 (Fiona) lan, come and have your breakfast. 496 00:43:13,800 --> 00:43:16,837 - Have you seen lan? - He'd gone before l woke up. 497 00:43:16,920 --> 00:43:18,956 His school uniform's not here neither. 498 00:43:31,480 --> 00:43:33,550 - Good morning. - Good morning. 499 00:43:36,560 --> 00:43:38,471 Give me this. 500 00:43:45,240 --> 00:43:47,754 Tell me if you're not a morning person. 501 00:43:48,760 --> 00:43:51,911 lt's not something l've had much experience of. 502 00:43:53,960 --> 00:43:56,394 First time for everything. 503 00:44:26,080 --> 00:44:28,230 How can that be good for you? 504 00:44:31,600 --> 00:44:34,751 - Or that. - Do you know what's not funny? 505 00:44:34,840 --> 00:44:37,434 You. Ever. 506 00:44:48,160 --> 00:44:50,390 Anybody before Kash? 507 00:44:55,560 --> 00:44:57,915 - One. - Who? 508 00:44:58,000 --> 00:44:59,797 l'm not telling you. 509 00:44:59,880 --> 00:45:03,839 And actually...up the arse? 510 00:45:03,920 --> 00:45:06,354 Cos... Look, l'm not taking the piss. 511 00:45:06,440 --> 00:45:10,956 l've come through a toilet roll. And that's just one finger. Barely up the ring. 512 00:45:11,040 --> 00:45:13,429 Screamed the house down! 513 00:45:13,520 --> 00:45:15,829 Do you get used to that? Can you? 514 00:45:17,000 --> 00:45:20,834 The whole point of the digestive system is about one-way traffic. 515 00:45:24,880 --> 00:45:26,916 lt just is. 516 00:45:27,000 --> 00:45:29,275 What? 517 00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:31,749 - What? - You! 518 00:45:34,520 --> 00:45:36,112 ''lt just is.'' 519 00:45:37,680 --> 00:45:40,797 Like we're only given lungs so we can fucking smoke. 520 00:45:49,280 --> 00:45:52,033 (Singing oom-pah song) 521 00:45:55,440 --> 00:45:58,716 - Sit yourselves down. Who's for bacon? - All right. 522 00:46:00,720 --> 00:46:01,948 (Boy) Yummy! 523 00:46:02,040 --> 00:46:04,349 - What's all this? - Well, er... 524 00:46:04,440 --> 00:46:07,113 Debbie's the only person that gets up earlier than me 525 00:46:07,200 --> 00:46:10,237 so we shot off down to Apu's on the corner. 526 00:46:10,320 --> 00:46:14,632 She said breakfast is her favourite meal of the day and since it's her birthday... 527 00:46:14,720 --> 00:46:17,678 (Gasps) No, it's not! 528 00:46:18,680 --> 00:46:21,797 l didn't say it was, it said l wished it was. 529 00:46:21,880 --> 00:46:25,270 All right. Sorry, completely misheard that, Debs. 530 00:46:25,360 --> 00:46:28,875 Perforated eardrum on the right. M'lady. 531 00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:31,269 - Anyone else want a drink? - Who's for bacon? 532 00:46:31,360 --> 00:46:35,239 You got 15 minutes tops. lan, Lip, your turn to wash up. 533 00:46:35,320 --> 00:46:38,630 Debbie, Carl, you need to put them bins out. 534 00:46:38,720 --> 00:46:43,111 (Frank) 'Somebody said, ''Show me a child before he's seven 535 00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:45,350 '''and l'll show you the man.'' 536 00:46:45,440 --> 00:46:48,512 'My problem with kids is they're only seven once. 537 00:46:48,600 --> 00:46:51,831 'After that it's a fucking nightmare. Massive! 538 00:46:51,920 --> 00:46:57,233 'One thing l'll say about my lot, though, they've been raised to show respect. 539 00:46:57,320 --> 00:47:01,199 'And l like that. lt matters in our house.' 540 00:47:12,080 --> 00:47:13,911 Has anyone seen Dad since last night? 541 00:47:14,000 --> 00:47:17,117 (Frank) 'Six kids to keep on top of.' 542 00:47:19,320 --> 00:47:22,278 You can't file Frank as missing. He's always missing. 543 00:47:22,360 --> 00:47:23,634 Ooh, that is tight. 544 00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:28,155 Sorry. Was my dad in the pub this afternoon? 545 00:47:28,240 --> 00:47:30,071 Yeah, he were there. Slaughtered. 546 00:47:30,160 --> 00:47:32,230 How was he looking when you left him? 547 00:47:32,320 --> 00:47:34,550 He can't be far. He's never far. 548 00:47:34,640 --> 00:47:38,872 Police? l've just found a body exactly fitting Frank's description. 549 00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:41,269 (Screaming) 550 00:48:19,080 --> 00:48:21,355 You might be getting... 551 00:48:21,440 --> 00:48:24,989 but you've got a long way to go before you can catch up with... 552 00:48:41,760 --> 00:48:43,079 For fuck's sake! 553 00:48:43,129 --> 00:48:47,679 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 42496

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