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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,151 --> 00:00:02,585 - It's pretty neat. - Mm-hmm. 2 00:00:02,586 --> 00:00:05,521 Cheryl Hines inviting us to her party. 3 00:00:05,522 --> 00:00:07,423 I think we're the only Groundlings she invited. 4 00:00:07,424 --> 00:00:09,625 I wanna meet that husband. He's a Kennedy. 5 00:00:09,626 --> 00:00:11,260 Really? Which one? 6 00:00:11,261 --> 00:00:13,129 John F. Kennedy. 7 00:00:13,130 --> 00:00:15,331 Ooh, the main one. 8 00:00:15,332 --> 00:00:17,033 Is he a lot older than her? 9 00:00:17,034 --> 00:00:19,735 Oh, and there are a lot of Hollywood bigwigs 10 00:00:19,736 --> 00:00:21,370 at this party, and Cheryl made it very clear 11 00:00:21,371 --> 00:00:22,772 we should network. 12 00:00:22,773 --> 00:00:24,006 Did you remember the wine? 13 00:00:24,007 --> 00:00:25,875 Yes. Okay. 14 00:00:25,876 --> 00:00:27,076 Where's the label? 15 00:00:27,077 --> 00:00:28,577 I peeled the label off. 16 00:00:28,578 --> 00:00:29,979 You peeled it off? 17 00:00:29,980 --> 00:00:32,448 She's gonna think it's moonshine, you idiot. 18 00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:34,083 Well, I don't know what else I was supposed to do. 19 00:00:34,084 --> 00:00:35,251 It was a cheap bottle. 20 00:00:35,252 --> 00:00:36,318 (SCOFFING) Oh, my God. 21 00:00:36,319 --> 00:00:37,720 I mean, you know, with the label off though, 22 00:00:37,721 --> 00:00:39,221 I figured it could be anything. 23 00:00:39,222 --> 00:00:41,357 Maybe she'll think we own a vineyard. 24 00:00:41,358 --> 00:00:43,426 Oh, so we can tell people when they ask 25 00:00:43,427 --> 00:00:45,094 why we're not successful in the entertainment business, 26 00:00:45,095 --> 00:00:46,662 we've been making wine. 27 00:00:46,663 --> 00:00:48,397 (CHERYL) Hi, guys! 28 00:00:48,398 --> 00:00:49,765 Oh, you look perfect. 29 00:00:49,766 --> 00:00:53,369 For you and your husband. He's a Kennedy. 30 00:00:53,370 --> 00:00:55,571 Oh, is that right? (CHUCKLES) 31 00:00:55,572 --> 00:00:57,239 Where is this from? 32 00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:59,075 Probably a gas station. 33 00:00:59,076 --> 00:01:00,309 Oh. (CHUCKLES) 34 00:01:00,310 --> 00:01:01,610 Gas station... 35 00:01:01,611 --> 00:01:04,847 Cheryl, thank you so much for having us, really. 36 00:01:04,848 --> 00:01:06,749 I know it's been a hard year for you guys, 37 00:01:06,750 --> 00:01:08,751 and this is the least I can do. 38 00:01:08,752 --> 00:01:11,120 So why don't you take off your jackets and follow me? 39 00:01:11,121 --> 00:01:13,622 Thank you. 40 00:01:13,623 --> 00:01:15,257 Fancy, fancy. Take off our...? 41 00:01:15,258 --> 00:01:17,126 I think yes. Really? 42 00:01:17,127 --> 00:01:18,494 Oh, hey. 43 00:01:18,495 --> 00:01:20,429 Thank you. 44 00:01:20,430 --> 00:01:22,764 So, here are your aprons. 45 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,302 And just keep filling up the champagne glasses 46 00:01:26,303 --> 00:01:28,204 and passing around the hors d'oeuvres. 47 00:01:28,205 --> 00:01:30,306 Oh, and if you guys get hungry, 48 00:01:30,307 --> 00:01:32,408 don't eat any of this, it's for the guests. 49 00:01:32,409 --> 00:01:34,009 Thank you. I'm sorry. 50 00:01:34,010 --> 00:01:36,846 Gotta get back out there. 51 00:01:36,847 --> 00:01:38,446 Thanks, guys. 52 00:01:40,751 --> 00:01:42,685 We are working at this party? 53 00:01:42,686 --> 00:01:44,120 No. No, no, no, no. 54 00:01:44,121 --> 00:01:47,989 Her email said, "Do you guys wanna come work the party?" 55 00:01:49,025 --> 00:01:50,426 What?! 56 00:01:50,427 --> 00:01:52,228 I thought she meant work it. 57 00:01:52,229 --> 00:01:55,163 Work it, network, schmooze! 58 00:01:57,701 --> 00:01:59,335 Let's just get the hell outta here. 59 00:01:59,336 --> 00:02:01,270 Let's find our jackets and get the hell outta here. 60 00:02:01,271 --> 00:02:02,538 Wait. 61 00:02:02,539 --> 00:02:05,506 I mean, I can actually use the money. 62 00:02:07,477 --> 00:02:09,677 I could too. 63 00:02:11,481 --> 00:02:14,683 Oh my God. 64 00:02:14,684 --> 00:02:17,119 (SIGHS) 65 00:02:17,120 --> 00:02:19,355 - You're a good friend, Hugh. - You're a great friend. 66 00:02:19,356 --> 00:02:21,390 - Yes, I am. - Yeah. 67 00:02:21,391 --> 00:02:23,692 Also, Larry, you're the one that drove us here, 68 00:02:23,693 --> 00:02:25,694 so I can't go anywhere without you. 69 00:02:25,695 --> 00:02:26,962 It's gonna be fun though. 70 00:02:26,963 --> 00:02:28,931 - It's gonna be super, super, super fun. - Yeah. 71 00:02:28,932 --> 00:02:30,699 - All right. - Gonna have good attitudes, right? 72 00:02:30,700 --> 00:02:32,368 Great attitudes. 73 00:02:32,369 --> 00:02:36,539 Just go out there, and we... we make it look easy. 74 00:02:36,540 --> 00:02:38,172 (GLASSES BREAKING) 75 00:02:44,848 --> 00:02:47,315 (PEOPLE CHATTERING) 76 00:02:50,520 --> 00:02:52,221 Ugh! Tastes like cheese! 77 00:02:52,222 --> 00:02:54,623 Ick. Can't have cheese. 78 00:02:54,624 --> 00:02:57,393 ? I've got something burning ? 79 00:02:57,394 --> 00:03:00,563 Oh, sorry. Very sorry about that. 80 00:03:00,564 --> 00:03:03,032 It's hard to know how much she's gonna rise there. 81 00:03:03,033 --> 00:03:04,500 I'm sorry, sip it, sip it, sip it, sip it, sip it, 82 00:03:04,501 --> 00:03:06,035 sip it, sip it, sip it, sip it, sip it! 83 00:03:06,036 --> 00:03:08,103 That was your fault, that was completely your fault. 84 00:03:08,104 --> 00:03:11,106 Seriously, who would you rather have sex with? 85 00:03:11,107 --> 00:03:15,411 ? Baby, I can't get enough ? 86 00:03:15,412 --> 00:03:20,381 ? Baby, I can't get enough, oh ? 87 00:03:22,352 --> 00:03:25,254 Uh... does this... this belong to anyone? 88 00:03:25,255 --> 00:03:27,790 Is anyone working on this? Hello? 89 00:03:27,791 --> 00:03:30,693 - Excuse me. - Hi. 90 00:03:30,694 --> 00:03:31,961 Hi. 91 00:03:31,962 --> 00:03:34,462 That toilet's overflowing upstairs. 92 00:03:36,499 --> 00:03:38,566 Kidding me? 93 00:03:41,571 --> 00:03:43,739 Die, you son of a bitch! 94 00:03:43,740 --> 00:03:46,876 Oh, oh! Did you clog the toilet? 95 00:03:46,877 --> 00:03:48,377 (LARRY) Oh, did you have diarrhea? 96 00:03:48,378 --> 00:03:51,247 You had diarrhea in Cheryl Hines' bathroom? 97 00:03:51,248 --> 00:03:53,815 Who had diarrhea in Cheryl Hines' bathroom? 98 00:03:55,552 --> 00:03:58,787 Hugh, Larry, and Rachel. What a surprise. 99 00:03:58,788 --> 00:04:00,990 It's been too long, huh? 100 00:04:00,991 --> 00:04:03,926 Hey, have you had the pleasure of seeing "The First Gentleman"? 101 00:04:03,927 --> 00:04:05,961 I'm sure you're aware it's the number-one movie 102 00:04:05,962 --> 00:04:08,063 in America for the past five and a half weeks. 103 00:04:08,064 --> 00:04:11,200 They say that it'll be the first comedy to gross 104 00:04:11,201 --> 00:04:13,168 over a billion dollars worldwide, 105 00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:16,105 and to see my name in the credits, oh my God! 106 00:04:16,106 --> 00:04:18,807 I just... you know, I just have to pinch myself. 107 00:04:18,808 --> 00:04:20,843 Ow! Ah! 108 00:04:20,844 --> 00:04:22,244 Why did you pinch me? 109 00:04:22,245 --> 00:04:24,280 Because you will never know the feeling. 110 00:04:24,281 --> 00:04:26,448 So, tell me, you guys, 111 00:04:26,449 --> 00:04:28,651 what are you working on these days, huh? 112 00:04:28,652 --> 00:04:30,286 Hey... oh! 113 00:04:30,287 --> 00:04:32,588 Did somebody take a shit in my bathroom? 114 00:04:32,589 --> 00:04:34,290 You guys can't poop in this bathroom. 115 00:04:34,291 --> 00:04:37,760 Listen, the dishes aren't gonna wash themselves, come on! 116 00:04:37,761 --> 00:04:40,095 Oh, and people have been putting recycling 117 00:04:40,096 --> 00:04:41,430 in with the regular trash, 118 00:04:41,431 --> 00:04:43,933 so I need you to take it outside, dump it, 119 00:04:43,934 --> 00:04:45,668 sift through it and then separate it. 120 00:04:45,669 --> 00:04:50,539 Dump it, sift, separate. 121 00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:51,840 You guys! 122 00:04:51,841 --> 00:04:54,043 Geez! Now! 123 00:04:54,044 --> 00:04:57,613 Uh, we also... have a vineyard 124 00:04:57,614 --> 00:05:00,349 where we make wine. 125 00:05:00,350 --> 00:05:04,285 I'm sure you do... shitfaces. 126 00:05:07,991 --> 00:05:10,125 Morning, family. 127 00:05:10,126 --> 00:05:11,460 - Morning. - Morning. 128 00:05:11,461 --> 00:05:12,995 Mwah! Did everyone sleep well? 129 00:05:12,996 --> 00:05:15,531 No, because your dog was barking all night. 130 00:05:15,532 --> 00:05:16,966 I didn't hear anything. 131 00:05:16,967 --> 00:05:19,268 Well, maybe that's because you take fistfuls of pills 132 00:05:19,269 --> 00:05:20,703 before you go to bed? 133 00:05:20,704 --> 00:05:23,005 Uh, I take one pill, and it's prescribed. 134 00:05:23,006 --> 00:05:25,207 - By your doctor? - Someone's doctor. 135 00:05:25,208 --> 00:05:28,010 Ethan, she's our guest, all right? 136 00:05:28,011 --> 00:05:29,845 You're just cranky because you're not eating bread. 137 00:05:29,846 --> 00:05:32,114 I think after 11 months, the word is "squatter," 138 00:05:32,115 --> 00:05:33,949 and I lost four pounds. 139 00:05:33,950 --> 00:05:35,184 Okay, Gandhi. 140 00:05:35,185 --> 00:05:37,453 Well, I can't afford my old apartment. 141 00:05:37,454 --> 00:05:38,921 Do you know how hard it is to find a place 142 00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:41,590 that takes dogs and is in a safe neighborhood 143 00:05:41,591 --> 00:05:43,792 where I'm not gonna get murdered every five minutes? 144 00:05:43,793 --> 00:05:44,927 Well, it's definitely much harder 145 00:05:44,928 --> 00:05:46,195 when you never look. 146 00:05:46,196 --> 00:05:48,197 Lois, let's take Izzy for a walk. 147 00:05:48,198 --> 00:05:50,232 Daddy, do I have time? What time's the movie? 148 00:05:50,233 --> 00:05:51,400 Oh, you guys are going to a movie? 149 00:05:51,401 --> 00:05:52,868 What are you seeing? (STAMMERING) 150 00:05:52,869 --> 00:05:54,837 - "The First Gentleman." - Seriously? 151 00:05:54,838 --> 00:05:56,138 It's getting great reviews. 152 00:05:56,139 --> 00:05:57,239 It's doing really well. 153 00:06:00,710 --> 00:06:04,013 Oh my God. 154 00:06:04,014 --> 00:06:06,181 (SAM) Look at you, you're so comfortable 155 00:06:06,182 --> 00:06:07,683 - on that horse. - (HUGH CHUCKLING) 156 00:06:07,684 --> 00:06:10,019 I didn't know this was gonna be part of my daily routine. 157 00:06:10,020 --> 00:06:11,720 You know, we really do have a nice life. 158 00:06:11,721 --> 00:06:13,188 - (PHONE RINGING) - Oh, oh, oh. 159 00:06:13,189 --> 00:06:14,623 I thought we weren't answering our phones. 160 00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:17,259 It's work, I have to. Hi, Libby. 161 00:06:17,260 --> 00:06:21,363 What's up? Oh no, you're kidding! 162 00:06:21,364 --> 00:06:22,731 We're not gonna get the Cumberland Suite 163 00:06:22,732 --> 00:06:24,099 at the Four Seasons. 164 00:06:24,100 --> 00:06:25,768 That's all right, we can get any room, I don't care. 165 00:06:25,769 --> 00:06:27,436 I know, but we're gonna be in Toronto for three months. 166 00:06:27,437 --> 00:06:28,871 We're gonna want lots of space. 167 00:06:28,872 --> 00:06:31,407 You know what, how about we just rent a house 168 00:06:31,408 --> 00:06:33,075 in a cool neighborhood, you know what I like. 169 00:06:33,076 --> 00:06:36,779 But make sure there is a good coffee spot for Hugh nearby. 170 00:06:36,780 --> 00:06:38,113 I don't need a good coffee spot. 171 00:06:38,114 --> 00:06:39,882 Yeah, but you're not gonna want to hang out with me 172 00:06:39,883 --> 00:06:41,250 on set every day. 173 00:06:41,251 --> 00:06:42,451 Wait, what? 174 00:06:42,452 --> 00:06:43,952 No, that's supposed to be at noon. 175 00:06:43,953 --> 00:06:46,121 No, it's fine, just, um, tell Paul 176 00:06:46,122 --> 00:06:47,423 I'll be there as soon as I can. 177 00:06:47,424 --> 00:06:49,758 Okay, thanks, bye. 178 00:06:49,759 --> 00:06:51,260 I need a day off. 179 00:06:51,261 --> 00:06:52,728 Can we trade places? 180 00:06:52,729 --> 00:06:57,066 (GRUNTS) Um, will you do me a favor? 181 00:06:57,067 --> 00:06:58,934 Can you untack Ulysses for me? 182 00:06:58,935 --> 00:07:01,270 Untack means take him to the glue factory, right? 183 00:07:01,271 --> 00:07:02,404 No, don't listen to him. 184 00:07:02,405 --> 00:07:04,406 But remember, he's got this... 185 00:07:04,407 --> 00:07:06,275 he doesn't like that ear touched. 186 00:07:06,276 --> 00:07:09,445 I wasn't gonna touch it. Okay. 187 00:07:09,446 --> 00:07:11,413 Mwah. I love you. 188 00:07:11,414 --> 00:07:12,947 Love you too. 189 00:07:19,622 --> 00:07:21,289 (GASPS) No. 190 00:07:24,027 --> 00:07:26,395 Uh... sh... 191 00:07:26,396 --> 00:07:28,863 (DOG PANTING) 192 00:07:29,999 --> 00:07:32,367 (GRUNTING) 193 00:07:32,368 --> 00:07:33,936 Oh, gotcha. 194 00:07:33,937 --> 00:07:37,606 Oh God, what is that? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! 195 00:07:37,607 --> 00:07:39,408 Izzy! 196 00:07:39,409 --> 00:07:41,577 Ohh! Izzy, help! 197 00:07:41,578 --> 00:07:43,312 Oh God. 198 00:07:43,313 --> 00:07:44,779 Oh... 199 00:07:47,317 --> 00:07:49,318 May I help you find something? 200 00:07:49,319 --> 00:07:50,686 Mark-Paul Gosselaar. 201 00:07:50,687 --> 00:07:53,655 You... oh, you know who you are. 202 00:07:53,656 --> 00:07:56,125 I, um... I dropped my phone. 203 00:07:56,126 --> 00:07:57,993 Oh, I thought you were just a crazy fan 204 00:07:57,994 --> 00:07:59,294 going through my trash. 205 00:07:59,295 --> 00:08:00,929 Oh, pfft, no, I'm not a fan. 206 00:08:00,930 --> 00:08:02,498 I mean, I am a fan, but I'm not, like, crazy. 207 00:08:02,499 --> 00:08:03,799 I mean, a little bit crazy, 208 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:04,933 but I'm not, like, diagnosed by a doctor, 209 00:08:04,934 --> 00:08:06,902 you know, 'cause he's not a doctor, 210 00:08:06,903 --> 00:08:08,504 so it doesn't matter what he says. 211 00:08:08,505 --> 00:08:12,374 Uh... I should get out of your garbage. 212 00:08:12,375 --> 00:08:13,609 Do you... do you need help? 213 00:08:13,610 --> 00:08:16,345 Uh, that'd be... that'd be great... 214 00:08:16,346 --> 00:08:18,547 Okay. If you don't mind. 215 00:08:18,548 --> 00:08:19,982 Here. (GRUNTS) 216 00:08:19,983 --> 00:08:23,150 Thanks. Okay. Yeah, got it. 217 00:08:24,254 --> 00:08:25,854 Okay, you're out. 218 00:08:25,855 --> 00:08:27,256 Oh, right, thanks. 219 00:08:27,257 --> 00:08:28,489 There you go. Yeah. 220 00:08:29,926 --> 00:08:31,760 Um, do you live here? 221 00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:35,430 I live right here, yeah. I was... I was away. 222 00:08:35,431 --> 00:08:37,599 I just... just got back from London. 223 00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,868 I spent the year in London, I was shooting a show for the BBC. 224 00:08:39,869 --> 00:08:41,203 Wow. 225 00:08:41,204 --> 00:08:44,706 I, uh... I live two houses down. 226 00:08:44,707 --> 00:08:46,842 I mean, I don't live there, I'm squatting... staying. 227 00:08:46,843 --> 00:08:49,111 That's Michael and Ethan. So you know Michael and Ethan? 228 00:08:49,112 --> 00:08:52,014 Yeah, I... I actually... I used to be married to Michael. 229 00:08:52,015 --> 00:08:54,750 - Oh. - Before he was gay. 230 00:08:54,751 --> 00:08:56,351 I mean, not before he was gay, he's always been gay, 231 00:08:56,352 --> 00:08:58,921 but it's not like I turned him gay, you know. 232 00:08:58,922 --> 00:09:00,989 But you can't turn someone gay, they're born gay, 233 00:09:00,990 --> 00:09:02,191 and that's who you are. 234 00:09:02,192 --> 00:09:04,693 Be what you wanna be and... 235 00:09:04,694 --> 00:09:06,962 - So you're Louise's mom? - L-Lois! 236 00:09:06,963 --> 00:09:09,565 - Lois' mom. - Lois, got it, yeah. 237 00:09:09,566 --> 00:09:12,301 She... she takes after her mom, she's cute. 238 00:09:12,302 --> 00:09:16,205 Oh... thank you. 239 00:09:16,206 --> 00:09:17,406 (CHUCKLES) 240 00:09:17,407 --> 00:09:21,376 This is... really weird for me, 'cause, um, 241 00:09:21,377 --> 00:09:24,680 I was a huge fan of "Saved By... " do you remember 242 00:09:24,681 --> 00:09:26,048 "Saved By the... " well, of course you remember 243 00:09:26,049 --> 00:09:27,916 - "Saved By the Bell." - Yes, I do. I remember. 244 00:09:27,917 --> 00:09:29,218 But I was a big, big fan. 245 00:09:29,219 --> 00:09:31,687 I actually wrote you a fan letter one time 246 00:09:31,688 --> 00:09:33,755 asking for, like, your autographed picture. 247 00:09:33,756 --> 00:09:35,390 - Yeah. - Probably don't remember. 248 00:09:35,391 --> 00:09:36,959 Absolutely not, no. 249 00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:39,761 I was... I was pretty young, so... 250 00:09:39,762 --> 00:09:41,330 Yeah, did you get anything back? 251 00:09:41,331 --> 00:09:42,731 - No. - That's too bad. 252 00:09:42,732 --> 00:09:44,099 - Yeah. - Well... 253 00:09:44,100 --> 00:09:45,400 It was really nice meeting you. 254 00:09:45,401 --> 00:09:47,936 Nice meeting you. What's your name? 255 00:09:47,937 --> 00:09:50,138 Oh, Rachel. I'm Rachel. 256 00:09:50,139 --> 00:09:52,107 I'd shake your hand, but you were in my trash, so... 257 00:09:52,108 --> 00:09:53,475 Right, filthy. Next time. 258 00:09:53,476 --> 00:09:54,952 - Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you. 259 00:09:54,953 --> 00:09:56,645 - All right. - Okay, come on, baby. 260 00:09:56,646 --> 00:09:58,380 I'm gonna close up shop here. 261 00:09:58,381 --> 00:10:00,348 - Okay. - Bye-bye. 262 00:10:02,619 --> 00:10:04,186 (CHUCKLES) 263 00:10:04,187 --> 00:10:05,387 (PHONE RINGING) 264 00:10:05,388 --> 00:10:06,588 (LARRY) Hey. 265 00:10:06,589 --> 00:10:07,923 (JEN, ON PHONE) When are you coming home? 266 00:10:07,924 --> 00:10:10,459 I don't know, I was gonna go until the bars close, I guess. 267 00:10:10,460 --> 00:10:12,194 - I'm so tired, Larry. - (BABY CRYING) 268 00:10:12,195 --> 00:10:13,528 The second I get one to fall asleep, 269 00:10:13,529 --> 00:10:15,631 the other wakes up, and they're gonna wake up Jack and Elliot. 270 00:10:15,632 --> 00:10:17,532 I don't know what to do, I have to work. 271 00:10:17,533 --> 00:10:19,101 Well, can you at least give me a couple hours tomorrow 272 00:10:19,102 --> 00:10:21,937 so I can get out of the house? I'm losing my mind. 273 00:10:21,938 --> 00:10:23,772 No, I'm sorry, I have to write tomorrow. 274 00:10:23,773 --> 00:10:25,407 Well, I cannot keep doing this. 275 00:10:25,408 --> 00:10:27,676 Maybe it's time my parents come down. 276 00:10:27,677 --> 00:10:30,379 No! Your parents are not living with us. 277 00:10:30,380 --> 00:10:32,147 Definitely not! 278 00:10:32,148 --> 00:10:34,316 - And it's "come up." - What? 279 00:10:34,317 --> 00:10:35,884 Your parents live in Long Beach. 280 00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:37,819 That's south of us. We're "up." 281 00:10:37,820 --> 00:10:39,655 Shut up, Larry. I'm calling my parents. 282 00:10:39,656 --> 00:10:42,457 No! I'm not living with a man 283 00:10:42,458 --> 00:10:43,992 who stood up at our wedding and said, 284 00:10:43,993 --> 00:10:46,094 "If no one will object, I'll object." 285 00:10:46,095 --> 00:10:47,496 Just a minute, honey. 286 00:10:47,497 --> 00:10:50,365 Hey! Ho! I gotta go. 287 00:10:50,366 --> 00:10:53,701 Hey, no! Stop it! Hey! 288 00:10:59,021 --> 00:11:01,088 Hello? 289 00:11:01,089 --> 00:11:03,424 Hugh? 290 00:11:03,425 --> 00:11:06,327 I don't like how white everything is. 291 00:11:06,328 --> 00:11:09,263 It's like she's obsessed with white. 292 00:11:09,264 --> 00:11:11,465 Kinda looks like you're obsessed with denim. 293 00:11:11,466 --> 00:11:12,800 You look like Jay Leno. 294 00:11:12,801 --> 00:11:14,035 Has anybody ever told you that one? 295 00:11:14,036 --> 00:11:15,670 You did, just now, thanks. 296 00:11:15,671 --> 00:11:18,406 I'll tell you what, if one of my 47 children lived here, 297 00:11:18,407 --> 00:11:22,242 all this white would be white for about point-zero seconds. 298 00:11:24,413 --> 00:11:27,014 They look so happy together. 299 00:11:27,015 --> 00:11:28,049 Hugh! 300 00:11:28,050 --> 00:11:30,585 Hello! Sorry, I couldn't hear anything. 301 00:11:30,586 --> 00:11:33,754 These waves are so ridiculously loud. 302 00:11:33,755 --> 00:11:35,590 My God, do you wanna switch lives for a week? 303 00:11:35,591 --> 00:11:36,891 Maybe. 304 00:11:36,892 --> 00:11:39,527 Are you sick or...? 305 00:11:39,528 --> 00:11:41,629 Do you guys want something to drink? 306 00:11:41,630 --> 00:11:42,930 What... 307 00:11:42,931 --> 00:11:45,032 Is that scotch? 308 00:11:45,033 --> 00:11:47,568 Sir Winston Churchill began every single day with scotch. 309 00:11:47,569 --> 00:11:49,704 But he would make it last until noon. 310 00:11:49,705 --> 00:11:52,373 Well, it's 11:00 in the morning. 311 00:11:52,374 --> 00:11:54,441 Well, I guess I'm no Winston Churchill. 312 00:11:57,713 --> 00:12:00,781 All right, let's focus. Robin Hood. 313 00:12:00,782 --> 00:12:03,084 Maybe we have to have Li'l John say something, 314 00:12:03,085 --> 00:12:04,585 you know, so we know his plan worked. 315 00:12:04,586 --> 00:12:07,221 Like, "great" or "amazing." 316 00:12:07,222 --> 00:12:09,090 No, they don't say "amazing." 317 00:12:09,091 --> 00:12:10,758 What do they say? Um... 318 00:12:10,759 --> 00:12:12,126 Can you stop saying "they"? 319 00:12:12,127 --> 00:12:13,427 Hugh, what's the black word for "amazing"? 320 00:12:13,428 --> 00:12:14,695 Amazing. 321 00:12:14,696 --> 00:12:17,231 I believe that's one of the words we all share. 322 00:12:17,232 --> 00:12:19,533 Interesting. 323 00:12:19,534 --> 00:12:20,635 (DOORBELL RINGS) 324 00:12:20,636 --> 00:12:23,904 Oh. Oh, Jesus. We gotta get up. 325 00:12:23,905 --> 00:12:25,640 They're taking all these couches. 326 00:12:25,641 --> 00:12:27,475 Why, what's wrong with 'em? 327 00:12:27,476 --> 00:12:29,243 I have no idea. 328 00:12:29,244 --> 00:12:33,648 Oh, hey, it's unlocked! It's these three, guys, thanks. 329 00:12:33,649 --> 00:12:35,616 You're going to Toronto on Monday? 330 00:12:35,617 --> 00:12:38,753 Uh... yeah, Sam's shooting a movie up there, 331 00:12:38,754 --> 00:12:40,288 so I thought I would, like, go up with her 332 00:12:40,289 --> 00:12:41,889 and hang out for a little bit. 333 00:12:41,890 --> 00:12:43,491 How long are you going? 334 00:12:43,492 --> 00:12:45,393 I don't know, not long. 335 00:12:45,394 --> 00:12:47,128 Like the weekend, I don't know. 336 00:12:47,129 --> 00:12:49,430 I wish I was going to Toronto on Monday. 337 00:12:49,431 --> 00:12:52,466 Instead, I'll be helping my in-laws move into my house. 338 00:12:52,467 --> 00:12:54,135 What?! 339 00:12:54,136 --> 00:12:56,003 I thought that's what you didn't want. 340 00:12:56,004 --> 00:12:57,638 Yeah, well, it is, but apparently, 341 00:12:57,639 --> 00:12:59,874 I was outvoted, one-to-one. 342 00:12:59,875 --> 00:13:01,676 Oh my God, this is like a bad sitcom. 343 00:13:01,677 --> 00:13:03,911 This is the thing we should be writing. 344 00:13:03,912 --> 00:13:07,114 The... the nitwit husband and his stressed-out wife 345 00:13:07,115 --> 00:13:08,516 who can't handle their four boys, 346 00:13:08,517 --> 00:13:10,151 so they have to have the in-laws move in with 'em. 347 00:13:10,152 --> 00:13:13,254 And in classic sitcom style, 348 00:13:13,255 --> 00:13:18,025 the father-in-law hates you, and you gotta live together. 349 00:13:18,026 --> 00:13:19,460 Maybe no more scotch for you. 350 00:13:19,461 --> 00:13:20,661 You know what we'll call it? 351 00:13:20,662 --> 00:13:22,263 "The Dorf Is Always Open." 352 00:13:22,264 --> 00:13:25,466 No, um... "Open Dorf Policy." 353 00:13:25,467 --> 00:13:27,368 That's better 'cause it's stupider. 354 00:13:27,369 --> 00:13:29,670 Okay. 355 00:13:29,671 --> 00:13:32,707 Aren't those like the exact same couches? 356 00:13:32,708 --> 00:13:37,043 No, the old ones were cream, and these new ones are bone. 357 00:13:42,818 --> 00:13:44,785 I mean, what is Hugh's problem? 358 00:13:44,786 --> 00:13:46,921 I feel like he's worse every time we see him. 359 00:13:46,922 --> 00:13:49,490 I mean, how many scotches did he have... three, four? 360 00:13:49,491 --> 00:13:53,194 Does he just lie around all day drinking, hating people? 361 00:13:53,195 --> 00:13:55,128 Is that what he does for a living? 362 00:13:57,999 --> 00:14:00,034 Larry? 363 00:14:00,035 --> 00:14:01,469 What's that? 364 00:14:01,470 --> 00:14:03,504 Where are you right now? 365 00:14:03,505 --> 00:14:05,706 I was just thinking about something. 366 00:14:05,707 --> 00:14:09,110 So I'm this nitwit of a husband, right? 367 00:14:09,111 --> 00:14:13,414 And I got this stressed-out wife and we got the two boys at home. 368 00:14:13,415 --> 00:14:16,917 And then out of nowhere, boom, we get two more, 369 00:14:16,918 --> 00:14:18,986 and they're twins, twin boys. 370 00:14:18,987 --> 00:14:20,755 And then if that's not crazy enough, 371 00:14:20,756 --> 00:14:23,557 who comes knocking at the door, but my in-laws! 372 00:14:23,558 --> 00:14:26,260 And in classic sitcom style, 373 00:14:26,261 --> 00:14:28,596 my father-in-law, he hates me. 374 00:14:28,597 --> 00:14:32,298 But now, we all have to live together. 375 00:14:39,107 --> 00:14:40,174 I love it! 376 00:14:40,175 --> 00:14:42,376 It's great. It's great. 377 00:14:42,377 --> 00:14:46,347 And I was thinking maybe it's called "Open Dorf Policy." 378 00:14:46,348 --> 00:14:50,284 Ha! Is that a wordplay? 379 00:14:50,285 --> 00:14:51,619 (BEN) I see what you did there, Lar. 380 00:14:51,620 --> 00:14:53,521 It's a word... it's on... It's a wordplay. 381 00:14:53,522 --> 00:14:55,446 It's based on open door policy, is that right? 382 00:14:55,447 --> 00:14:58,292 - Yeah. - And "Dorf" and "door." 383 00:14:58,293 --> 00:15:00,428 - Ohh! - Which I never, ever thought about before. 384 00:15:00,429 --> 00:15:02,129 It's very clever. 385 00:15:02,130 --> 00:15:03,230 - That's a great title. - Boy. 386 00:15:03,231 --> 00:15:05,132 - A-plus. - A-plus-plus! 387 00:15:05,133 --> 00:15:06,834 Wow, hilarious. 388 00:15:06,835 --> 00:15:09,570 "Open Dorf Policy." "Open Dorf Policy," 389 00:15:09,571 --> 00:15:13,641 based on... you being a Dorf. 390 00:15:13,642 --> 00:15:15,943 - Wow. - And who would write it? 391 00:15:15,944 --> 00:15:17,745 I'd write it, by myself. 392 00:15:17,746 --> 00:15:19,547 (BOTH LAUGHING) 393 00:15:19,548 --> 00:15:20,981 No! 394 00:15:20,982 --> 00:15:23,617 (LAUGHING CONTINUES) 395 00:15:23,618 --> 00:15:25,986 Oh, Larry, no! 396 00:15:25,987 --> 00:15:28,055 No, no, you misunderstand me. 397 00:15:28,056 --> 00:15:31,258 What I meant was I'd write it 398 00:15:31,259 --> 00:15:33,861 with you and Rachel, by ourselves. 399 00:15:33,862 --> 00:15:35,329 - Oh, okay, okay. - Oh! 400 00:15:35,330 --> 00:15:37,598 - So Rachel could write most of it. - Yeah. 401 00:15:37,599 --> 00:15:39,200 - Yeah, okay, yeah. - Well, probably. 402 00:15:39,201 --> 00:15:40,968 - Melissa? - Yes? 403 00:15:40,969 --> 00:15:42,336 Should we do this? 404 00:15:42,337 --> 00:15:44,972 I think we should do this. 405 00:15:44,973 --> 00:15:48,576 (BOTH MAKING KISSING NOISES) 406 00:15:48,577 --> 00:15:50,978 Welcome to On the Day Productions, Larry. 407 00:15:50,979 --> 00:15:52,947 (MELISSA) We are so excited 408 00:15:52,948 --> 00:15:55,449 about starting the "Open Dorf Policy" 409 00:15:55,450 --> 00:15:56,750 journey with you. 410 00:15:56,751 --> 00:15:58,819 To be honest, I was a little nervous 411 00:15:58,820 --> 00:16:00,588 coming in here today, you know, 412 00:16:00,589 --> 00:16:03,657 given our rocky history. 413 00:16:06,487 --> 00:16:07,788 Well, you hurt us. 414 00:16:07,789 --> 00:16:10,023 Yeah, you hurt us real bad, Larry. 415 00:16:10,024 --> 00:16:12,592 You and Rachel and Hugh. 416 00:16:12,593 --> 00:16:15,662 But we're past the anger at the three of you, 417 00:16:15,663 --> 00:16:16,997 and we're into a forgiveness phase. 418 00:16:16,998 --> 00:16:19,299 That is so big of you guys. 419 00:16:19,300 --> 00:16:21,635 It is. It's huge, actually. 420 00:16:21,636 --> 00:16:23,870 But luckily, we have been 421 00:16:23,871 --> 00:16:26,707 so fortunate and... just blessed 422 00:16:26,708 --> 00:16:29,843 to have been working through our trauma therapy 423 00:16:29,844 --> 00:16:33,380 with an amazing guru, Dr. Blaine Kaine. 424 00:16:33,381 --> 00:16:34,848 Well, he's not a doctor. 425 00:16:34,849 --> 00:16:36,149 He's a doctor. 426 00:16:36,150 --> 00:16:40,220 How do you feel about Larry, Hugh, and Rachel now? 427 00:16:40,221 --> 00:16:43,657 I wish they were underneath us. 428 00:16:43,658 --> 00:16:45,492 (LAUGHS) 429 00:16:45,493 --> 00:16:46,626 (LAUGHS) 430 00:16:47,706 --> 00:16:49,825 Are we crazy to work with Ben and Melissa again? 431 00:16:49,826 --> 00:16:51,899 - Yes! - All I know, 432 00:16:51,899 --> 00:16:53,132 is with me in the room, 433 00:16:53,133 --> 00:16:55,401 they called the main guy at CBS, 434 00:16:55,402 --> 00:16:57,537 and he said, "We're gonna do the pilot." 435 00:16:57,538 --> 00:16:59,739 Well then, he's the crazy one. 436 00:16:59,740 --> 00:17:01,207 I'm in. 437 00:17:01,208 --> 00:17:02,542 - What?! - Yes. 438 00:17:02,543 --> 00:17:03,910 No, I don't wanna high five. 439 00:17:03,911 --> 00:17:05,311 What, you think I wanna spend the rest of my life 440 00:17:05,312 --> 00:17:08,047 living with my ex-husband and his husband? 441 00:17:08,048 --> 00:17:10,283 That actually sounds like a good show too. 442 00:17:10,284 --> 00:17:12,085 Maybe if this one doesn't go, we do that one 443 00:17:12,086 --> 00:17:14,087 with the CBS guy. _ 444 00:17:14,088 --> 00:17:15,588 What's going on? 445 00:17:15,589 --> 00:17:16,923 Uh, nothing. 446 00:17:16,924 --> 00:17:19,292 Um... you know, to hell with it. 447 00:17:19,293 --> 00:17:20,426 I'm in too. 448 00:17:20,427 --> 00:17:21,995 - Really? - Yes. 449 00:17:21,996 --> 00:17:24,297 - Hey! - Oh, yay! 450 00:17:24,298 --> 00:17:26,132 I should go home to the 1,000 people 451 00:17:26,133 --> 00:17:28,668 who are currently living in my house. 452 00:17:28,669 --> 00:17:30,003 You guys got the bill? 453 00:17:30,004 --> 00:17:31,137 - Oh... - Ah. 454 00:17:31,138 --> 00:17:34,474 I got you jobs. You gotta impress the boss. 455 00:17:34,475 --> 00:17:36,174 You're disgusting. 456 00:17:38,145 --> 00:17:40,580 It would be pretty fun to write the Larry character. 457 00:17:40,581 --> 00:17:45,784 He is a uniquely unlikeable, likeable person. 458 00:17:46,954 --> 00:17:48,588 - See, I like this. - (CHUCKLES) 459 00:17:48,589 --> 00:17:50,690 No, it's true. You're excited. 460 00:17:50,691 --> 00:17:52,358 Kind of buzzing. 461 00:17:52,359 --> 00:17:54,292 This is fun, this is the you I love. 462 00:17:55,796 --> 00:17:58,498 To hang out with, and be friends with. 463 00:17:58,499 --> 00:18:01,833 - (CHUCKLES) - And, um... 464 00:18:04,438 --> 00:18:06,372 - Uh... - Can I... 465 00:18:06,373 --> 00:18:09,642 Yeah, yeah, why don't we... that's a great idea. 466 00:18:09,643 --> 00:18:11,110 Yeah. 467 00:18:11,111 --> 00:18:12,811 (PHONE CHIMES) 468 00:18:28,862 --> 00:18:30,430 Hey, Hugh? 469 00:18:30,431 --> 00:18:33,032 Um, I'm actually gonna head home. 470 00:18:33,033 --> 00:18:35,901 Um, it's later than I thought. 471 00:18:37,905 --> 00:18:40,672 What... all right. 472 00:18:45,813 --> 00:18:48,380 (SIGHS) 473 00:18:50,517 --> 00:18:51,684 Oh my God! 474 00:18:51,685 --> 00:18:54,887 You are such a disappointment. 475 00:18:54,888 --> 00:18:58,558 I cooked steaks for everyone, you weren't even here. 476 00:18:58,559 --> 00:19:00,827 I'm sorry, I had to work. 477 00:19:00,828 --> 00:19:03,863 Hey... I'm just riding ya. 478 00:19:03,864 --> 00:19:05,698 I thought you Jews were funny. 479 00:19:05,699 --> 00:19:07,332 (POLITELY CHUCKLES) 480 00:19:08,569 --> 00:19:11,104 Jen says I'm supposed to congratulate you. 481 00:19:11,105 --> 00:19:12,872 Sold a TV show or something? 482 00:19:12,873 --> 00:19:14,607 Yes, I did. 483 00:19:14,608 --> 00:19:16,242 Yeah, I'm gonna be acting in it too. 484 00:19:16,243 --> 00:19:18,011 Wow, well, if that had happened a year ago, 485 00:19:18,012 --> 00:19:20,780 Mary Ellen and I wouldn't have had to drag our old asses 486 00:19:20,781 --> 00:19:23,349 down from Long Beach, live in your tiny house 487 00:19:23,350 --> 00:19:25,218 while you chase your queer little dreams 488 00:19:25,219 --> 00:19:28,254 being a big Jew in Hollywood. 489 00:19:28,255 --> 00:19:30,356 Congratulations. 490 00:19:30,357 --> 00:19:32,290 Thank you very much. 491 00:19:33,460 --> 00:19:36,129 Oop, you got something right there. 492 00:19:36,130 --> 00:19:39,065 (LAUGHS) 493 00:19:39,066 --> 00:19:41,600 Every time! 494 00:19:44,371 --> 00:19:47,105 That'd actually be a very funny scene. 495 00:19:48,138 --> 00:19:50,560 Hey, babe? Libby wants to know 496 00:19:50,561 --> 00:19:53,496 if you have any dietary restrictions for the flight? 497 00:19:53,497 --> 00:19:55,465 I'm gonna tell her vegan. 498 00:19:55,466 --> 00:19:56,932 Kidding. 499 00:19:58,636 --> 00:20:00,336 Uh, Sam? 500 00:20:00,337 --> 00:20:01,703 Yeah? 501 00:20:03,140 --> 00:20:06,609 Um... nothing. 502 00:20:06,610 --> 00:20:08,945 I... I don't know what I was gonna say. 503 00:20:08,946 --> 00:20:11,580 Okay, well, let me know if it comes to you. 504 00:20:14,118 --> 00:20:16,585 (WATER RUNNING) 505 00:20:23,160 --> 00:20:25,595 I'm not going to Toronto. 506 00:20:25,596 --> 00:20:28,764 ?? 507 00:20:33,104 --> 00:20:35,971 ? Eight dollars and the truth ? 508 00:20:38,008 --> 00:20:41,343 ? I could never make you want me ? 509 00:20:43,447 --> 00:20:46,448 ? One foot still in the door ? 510 00:20:52,381 --> 00:20:55,349 ? One foot in something worse ? 511 00:20:57,553 --> 00:21:00,921 ? And Charlie, you were right ?? 512 00:21:01,127 --> 00:21:08,112 Subtitle sync and corrections by awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com. 513 00:21:08,162 --> 00:21:12,712 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 36515

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