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1
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:05,568
Tell Lizzie I'm sorry I can't
be there, but with everything-
2
00:00:05,569 --> 00:00:08,038
I'm sure she'll understand.
I'll give you a call
3
00:00:08,039 --> 00:00:10,206
as soon as there's
any news.
4
00:00:10,207 --> 00:00:11,708
Give her my best,
Molly.
5
00:00:11,709 --> 00:00:13,810
Bring back
a bucking son and heir!
6
00:00:13,811 --> 00:00:17,180
I'll try. Darling, are
you sure you won't come?
7
00:00:17,181 --> 00:00:19,349
A child? That's not
really my bag, darling.
8
00:00:19,350 --> 00:00:21,284
All that yelling
and thrashing about.
9
00:00:21,285 --> 00:00:23,620
I'll give you a call as
soon as we get to London.
10
00:00:23,621 --> 00:00:26,623
I expect a full report: Height,
weight, condition of teeth.
11
00:00:26,624 --> 00:00:29,325
Lexie: Newborn babies aren't
supposed to have teeth.
12
00:00:29,326 --> 00:00:31,795
I mean the father!
Find out when the bum
13
00:00:31,796 --> 00:00:35,231
is gonna make an honest
woman of my daughter!
14
00:00:35,232 --> 00:00:37,668
( moaning )
15
00:00:37,669 --> 00:00:40,804
- are you all right back there?
- Just about.
16
00:00:40,805 --> 00:00:44,407
Why don't you give them a call?
Tell 'em you're coming home.
17
00:00:44,408 --> 00:00:47,110
I'd rather do this
face to face- oh!
18
00:00:47,111 --> 00:00:48,244
Hold on!
19
00:00:48,245 --> 00:00:49,746
Good!
We're late!
20
00:00:51,049 --> 00:00:52,949
Foot down, Duncan.
21
00:00:52,950 --> 00:00:55,585
Kilwillie: So you still
haven't met the sire?
22
00:00:55,586 --> 00:00:57,854
She found him after
she left that weirdo Gerald.
23
00:00:57,855 --> 00:00:59,489
He's something
in the wine trade.
24
00:00:59,490 --> 00:01:02,392
Oh, capital.
Is he gonna marry her?
25
00:01:02,393 --> 00:01:03,794
( jeep revving )
26
00:01:08,866 --> 00:01:11,634
Hector: Someone remind
me why I employ that boy.
27
00:01:21,846 --> 00:01:23,479
Can't be far now.
28
00:01:23,480 --> 00:01:26,482
- Whoaaah!
- ( tires screeching )
29
00:01:28,786 --> 00:01:31,387
Have you gone
completely mad?!
30
00:01:31,388 --> 00:01:33,857
This is a private drive,
not Brand's Hatch!
31
00:01:33,858 --> 00:01:35,658
( woman moans )
32
00:01:35,659 --> 00:01:37,560
Hello, mommy.
33
00:01:37,561 --> 00:01:39,763
Lizzie, darling!
34
00:01:39,764 --> 00:01:42,132
I think I'm gonna
have the baby- ow!
35
00:01:42,133 --> 00:01:43,066
Oh, my!
36
00:01:44,736 --> 00:01:46,803
( theme music playing )
37
00:02:21,338 --> 00:02:23,539
It was Archie's idea
to use the old boathouse.
38
00:02:23,540 --> 00:02:25,008
Quite bright, really.
39
00:02:26,610 --> 00:02:28,478
So what do you think,
Kilwillie?
40
00:02:28,479 --> 00:02:30,013
Brave new world, eh?
41
00:02:30,014 --> 00:02:33,216
It's certainly a lot bigger
than I thought it was gonna be.
42
00:02:33,217 --> 00:02:35,318
Yes, Archie's
come up tops.
43
00:02:35,319 --> 00:02:37,854
- Chip off the old block.
- Hmm...
44
00:02:37,855 --> 00:02:41,057
come on, old man, you haven't
seen the half of it yet.
45
00:02:41,058 --> 00:02:43,326
I can't wait.
46
00:02:45,562 --> 00:02:47,330
So what time's
the journo coming?
47
00:02:47,331 --> 00:02:49,465
He's already here,
nosing around the place.
48
00:02:49,466 --> 00:02:51,334
You sure
you can't join us?
49
00:02:51,335 --> 00:02:52,836
I'm sorry, Arch,
I just-
50
00:02:52,837 --> 00:02:55,605
got a million things
to do before tomorrow.
51
00:02:55,606 --> 00:02:56,940
Packing and stuff.
52
00:02:56,941 --> 00:02:59,810
Actually, I was gonna ask
you and... Katrina, of course,
53
00:02:59,811 --> 00:03:01,945
if you'd like to come
to supper tonight?
54
00:03:01,946 --> 00:03:04,915
Give you a proper sendoff.
Of course, if you're busy-
55
00:03:04,916 --> 00:03:06,950
no, that'd be great.
56
00:03:06,951 --> 00:03:08,751
We'd both love to come.
57
00:03:08,752 --> 00:03:10,353
Good.
8:00 then?
58
00:03:10,354 --> 00:03:12,488
See you later.
59
00:03:12,489 --> 00:03:15,091
Hector: So we're
trying to create a place
60
00:03:15,092 --> 00:03:17,360
where there's something
for everyone to enjoy.
61
00:03:17,361 --> 00:03:19,896
- You will put that in the "Gazette"?
- Aye.
62
00:03:19,897 --> 00:03:22,065
- Name is Hector-
- "Naismith MacDonald. "
63
00:03:22,066 --> 00:03:25,302
Exactly. My good friend
and neighbor lord Kilwillie.
64
00:03:25,303 --> 00:03:27,938
- It's a big spread, is it?
- If there's a story.
65
00:03:27,939 --> 00:03:30,173
There's a story all
right. My son Archie.
66
00:03:30,174 --> 00:03:32,309
Campbell McCrory,
"Strathspey Gazette. "
67
00:03:32,310 --> 00:03:35,645
- Pleased to meet you- - Hector:
Shall we go and see your secret weapon?
68
00:03:35,646 --> 00:03:38,548
Secret weapon?
What secret weapon?
69
00:03:38,549 --> 00:03:40,383
All in good time,
Kilwillie.
70
00:03:40,384 --> 00:03:42,185
All in good time.
71
00:03:45,156 --> 00:03:47,891
She's been having
contractions since the loch.
72
00:03:47,892 --> 00:03:49,759
Come on, darling,
we're nearly there.
73
00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:52,428
Blimey, I didn't know
I was driving royalty.
74
00:03:52,429 --> 00:03:55,031
- You'd better call a midwife.
- Call a what?
75
00:03:55,032 --> 00:03:57,167
Oh!
No, don't bother, Lex.
76
00:03:57,168 --> 00:03:59,035
What is it, darling?
77
00:03:59,036 --> 00:04:02,205
Do you know, it's the strangest feeling.
78
00:04:02,206 --> 00:04:04,307
I think
they've stopped.
79
00:04:04,308 --> 00:04:07,177
They've just
completely stopped.
80
00:04:07,178 --> 00:04:08,245
Come on, sweetheart.
81
00:04:08,246 --> 00:04:10,247
Slowly.
That's it.
82
00:04:11,548 --> 00:04:13,216
( driver whistles )
83
00:04:13,217 --> 00:04:16,586
Molly: Why didn't you telephone,
let us know you were coming?
84
00:04:16,587 --> 00:04:18,521
Spur of the moment thing.
I just...
85
00:04:18,522 --> 00:04:21,391
knew I wanted my baby
to be born at home, so I...
86
00:04:21,392 --> 00:04:23,159
jumped on a train
and here I am.
87
00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:24,527
Oh, how lovely!
88
00:04:24,528 --> 00:04:27,530
You're coming back to spawn
at the place of your birth,
89
00:04:27,531 --> 00:04:30,566
just like a salmon.
I understand completely.
90
00:04:30,567 --> 00:04:31,968
I'm not in the way,
am I?
91
00:04:31,969 --> 00:04:34,404
I know Archie's got
other things on his mind,
92
00:04:34,405 --> 00:04:36,273
what with the opening
and so on.
93
00:04:36,274 --> 00:04:39,109
- More than that, to tell the truth.
- Oh? Do tell.
94
00:04:39,110 --> 00:04:41,378
Katrina's
leaving Glenbogle.
95
00:04:41,379 --> 00:04:44,014
- You're kidding! When?
- Tomorrow.
96
00:04:44,015 --> 00:04:45,848
- Oh!
- Quick, quick!
97
00:04:45,849 --> 00:04:47,183
Oh.
98
00:04:47,184 --> 00:04:48,618
No, no, I'm fine.
99
00:04:48,619 --> 00:04:51,454
Miss McLean is going to be
in charge next year,
100
00:04:51,455 --> 00:04:54,757
and she's promised to tell me
how you lot are behaving.
101
00:04:54,758 --> 00:04:58,428
So, when the bell goes,
I want you to walk, slowly-
102
00:04:58,429 --> 00:05:01,197
down the corridor
and get your stuff.
103
00:05:01,198 --> 00:05:02,532
Yes, Sandy?
104
00:05:02,533 --> 00:05:05,268
What's so great
about New Zealand, miss?
105
00:05:05,269 --> 00:05:07,804
Well...
it's very beautiful.
106
00:05:07,805 --> 00:05:10,440
And it's got lots
of great things there,
107
00:05:10,441 --> 00:05:13,243
like mountains
and lakes and...
108
00:05:13,244 --> 00:05:15,678
- wildlife.
- How far is it?
109
00:05:15,679 --> 00:05:17,280
Come up here
and I'll show you.
110
00:05:20,818 --> 00:05:22,452
We're here...
111
00:05:22,453 --> 00:05:25,188
and tomorrow, I've
got to go to Edinburgh
112
00:05:25,189 --> 00:05:26,923
to catch the sleeper
to London,
113
00:05:26,924 --> 00:05:28,658
which is where
I get my visa.
114
00:05:28,659 --> 00:05:31,161
And then I catch a flight all the way...
115
00:05:33,730 --> 00:05:36,266
- to New Zealand.
- That's miles, miss.
116
00:05:36,267 --> 00:05:37,633
I know.
117
00:05:39,870 --> 00:05:42,005
We'll have it put back
just the way it was.
118
00:05:42,006 --> 00:05:44,640
You can have your baby
right here in your old room.
119
00:05:44,641 --> 00:05:46,776
- Want this put in here?
- Thank you.
120
00:05:46,777 --> 00:05:49,179
Do you know, I had
all three of my children
121
00:05:49,180 --> 00:05:52,215
in this house
on that very beanbag!
122
00:05:52,216 --> 00:05:54,284
I'll go get the rest
of your stuff.
123
00:05:54,285 --> 00:05:56,619
He seems a nice enough
young man.
124
00:05:56,620 --> 00:05:59,255
He is, certainly compared
to what I'm used to.
125
00:05:59,256 --> 00:06:02,258
Will, uh, Donald
be joining us?
126
00:06:02,259 --> 00:06:04,160
It's David.
127
00:06:04,161 --> 00:06:07,163
- Of course.
- No, he won't.
128
00:06:07,164 --> 00:06:09,265
It's a long story.
129
00:06:10,534 --> 00:06:11,968
I rather thought
it might be.
130
00:06:13,570 --> 00:06:15,638
Why don't you
tell me
131
00:06:15,639 --> 00:06:17,740
and then I can prime
your father?
132
00:06:26,450 --> 00:06:28,418
Archie:
Our head ranger discovered
133
00:06:28,419 --> 00:06:31,388
that the Woodland Trust
is organising a competition.
134
00:06:31,389 --> 00:06:33,223
There's a big cash prize,
of course,
135
00:06:33,224 --> 00:06:35,558
and it would be great publicity
for us if we win.
136
00:06:35,559 --> 00:06:37,260
What do you think
of that, eh?
137
00:06:37,261 --> 00:06:40,196
Proud symbol of the renaissance
of the MacDonald family!
138
00:06:40,197 --> 00:06:42,965
What kind of competition
are we talking about here?
139
00:06:45,569 --> 00:06:48,171
Gentlemen,
we very much hope
140
00:06:48,172 --> 00:06:50,206
that what you're
looking at is
141
00:06:50,207 --> 00:06:52,708
the tallest tree
in Scotland.
142
00:06:52,709 --> 00:06:55,045
( chuckling )
Oh no, you're not.
143
00:06:55,046 --> 00:06:56,879
I beg your pardon?
144
00:06:56,880 --> 00:06:58,181
Oh no.
145
00:06:58,182 --> 00:06:59,982
Not by a long chalk.
146
00:07:10,294 --> 00:07:12,995
( mccrory muttering )
147
00:07:12,996 --> 00:07:16,199
...no, no. "all's fir
in love and war. "
148
00:07:20,804 --> 00:07:23,039
( sheep bleating )
149
00:07:24,608 --> 00:07:26,309
Kilwillie:
This is it.
150
00:07:26,310 --> 00:07:29,245
- This is the tallest tree in Scotland.
- Rubbish!
151
00:07:29,246 --> 00:07:32,115
It's an absolute monster.
You can see for yourself.
152
00:07:32,116 --> 00:07:35,585
- A mere sapling! - It's open competition.
The judges will decide.
153
00:07:35,586 --> 00:07:38,020
It's blatant treachery!
He's stolen your idea!
154
00:07:38,021 --> 00:07:40,156
I've never stolen
anything in my life!
155
00:07:40,157 --> 00:07:41,324
That's
your story!
156
00:07:41,325 --> 00:07:43,793
Well, there's an easy way to prove it.
157
00:07:43,794 --> 00:07:45,995
- William?
- Yes, your lordship?
158
00:07:45,996 --> 00:07:48,864
There's a modest little pine
on the neighboring estate.
159
00:07:48,865 --> 00:07:51,267
Bit of a shrimp,
but perhaps you would
160
00:07:51,268 --> 00:07:54,204
- be so good as to go measure it for me?
- Right you are, sir.
161
00:07:54,205 --> 00:07:56,005
Certainly not!
Who the devil are you?
162
00:07:56,006 --> 00:07:58,074
This is William,
my new man.
163
00:07:58,075 --> 00:08:00,710
Golly, if you see this oik
within 50 yards of my tree,
164
00:08:00,711 --> 00:08:02,945
you have my permission
to shoot him on sight!
165
00:08:02,946 --> 00:08:05,915
- Right you are, boss.
- And who might you be?
166
00:08:05,916 --> 00:08:07,850
They call me Golly.
167
00:08:07,851 --> 00:08:10,653
Golly... the ghillie.
168
00:08:10,654 --> 00:08:13,556
That is my name, friend.
Don't wear it out.
169
00:08:13,557 --> 00:08:16,126
You'll be Kilwillie's new ghillie...
170
00:08:16,127 --> 00:08:18,461
Billy.
171
00:08:18,462 --> 00:08:20,963
Face facts, Hector.
You're just fizzing.
172
00:08:20,964 --> 00:08:22,999
Because my tree's
taller than yours.
173
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:25,268
- It is not!
- It is so! It's much taller.
174
00:08:25,269 --> 00:08:26,369
That is enough.
175
00:08:26,370 --> 00:08:27,703
- Not!
- Is!
176
00:08:27,704 --> 00:08:29,939
- Not!
- Jolly well is, and you know it!
177
00:08:29,940 --> 00:08:32,275
Very well, we'll just have to find out,
178
00:08:32,276 --> 00:08:33,476
won't we?
179
00:08:35,579 --> 00:08:37,913
A centuries old
tribal enmity
180
00:08:37,914 --> 00:08:40,316
- rekindled.
- Steady on, mate.
181
00:08:40,317 --> 00:08:42,051
Come on.
182
00:08:42,052 --> 00:08:45,021
Clan warfare has
returned to Glenbogle!
183
00:08:45,022 --> 00:08:46,088
( chuckles )
184
00:08:51,228 --> 00:08:53,163
- Thanks very much.
- No problem.
185
00:08:53,164 --> 00:08:54,764
Have a good summer.
186
00:08:54,765 --> 00:08:56,799
I'm never going
to be able to do all that.
187
00:08:56,800 --> 00:08:58,201
Head teacher!
188
00:08:58,202 --> 00:09:00,170
You are going
to be brilliant.
189
00:09:00,171 --> 00:09:02,405
You can still change
your mind, you know.
190
00:09:02,406 --> 00:09:04,641
I can always get a job
somewhere else.
191
00:09:04,642 --> 00:09:06,643
Why are you feeling
so sorry for me?
192
00:09:06,644 --> 00:09:09,379
I am going to a beautiful
place with a wonderful man.
193
00:09:09,380 --> 00:09:11,314
What can be so bad
about that?
194
00:09:11,315 --> 00:09:13,216
And Archie?
195
00:09:13,217 --> 00:09:15,552
Haven't heard from him
since Fergal told him.
196
00:09:15,553 --> 00:09:17,820
Do you think
he's avoiding you?
197
00:09:17,821 --> 00:09:20,956
I think it's more likely
he couldn't care less.
198
00:09:22,959 --> 00:09:24,794
It is just a tree
after all.
199
00:09:24,795 --> 00:09:26,696
How much did I spend
on your education?
200
00:09:26,697 --> 00:09:28,631
It's a totem!
The clan of the MacDonalds
201
00:09:28,632 --> 00:09:31,367
against the sniveling
loyalists of Kilwillie castle.
202
00:09:31,368 --> 00:09:33,703
Hector! Molly's told me
to tell you-
203
00:09:33,704 --> 00:09:35,405
never mind
that now!
204
00:09:35,406 --> 00:09:37,940
Get a shotgun, ammunition,
and a sleeping bag-
205
00:09:37,941 --> 00:09:40,210
- but- - guard Archie's
tree with your life!
206
00:09:40,211 --> 00:09:43,145
If I know my neighbor, its
continued good health is in jeopardy!
207
00:09:43,146 --> 00:09:45,981
- Okay, Hector.
- Before you go, can you explain
208
00:09:45,982 --> 00:09:48,251
why a hackney carriage
is parked on my drive?
209
00:09:48,252 --> 00:09:50,420
That's what I've been
trying to tell you.
210
00:09:50,421 --> 00:09:52,422
Lizzie's here!
211
00:09:52,423 --> 00:09:54,023
What?
212
00:09:57,160 --> 00:09:59,295
She's in her old
bedroom.
213
00:10:01,432 --> 00:10:03,533
So, you must be
the man.
214
00:10:03,534 --> 00:10:06,402
- If you say so.
- I've been waiting a long time to meet you.
215
00:10:06,403 --> 00:10:08,504
I'm Lizzie's father,
head of the family.
216
00:10:08,505 --> 00:10:10,607
Oh, right. Pleased to meet you, sir.
217
00:10:10,608 --> 00:10:12,275
Never mind the sir.
218
00:10:12,276 --> 00:10:14,711
In the circumstances,
you may call me Hector.
219
00:10:20,183 --> 00:10:23,152
Fergal: I'm nervous about this
too, if it's any consolation.
220
00:10:23,153 --> 00:10:26,122
I wouldn't have thought you
got nervous about anything.
221
00:10:26,123 --> 00:10:28,958
Hey, half man,
half jellyfish.
222
00:10:28,959 --> 00:10:31,661
Well, I'm all jellyfish.
223
00:10:31,662 --> 00:10:35,030
Come on, it's scary.
Of course, it is.
224
00:10:35,031 --> 00:10:36,633
What you do every day-
225
00:10:36,634 --> 00:10:39,168
teaching a class of kids-
that is terrifying.
226
00:10:39,169 --> 00:10:40,836
I could never do that.
227
00:10:40,837 --> 00:10:43,573
That's 'cause you could
never stand still long enough.
228
00:10:47,411 --> 00:10:50,780
It's 24 hours in a plane.
That's all.
229
00:10:50,781 --> 00:10:53,683
Come on, it's not like it's
the other side of the world.
230
00:10:57,120 --> 00:10:59,289
What do you want to do on our last night
231
00:10:59,290 --> 00:11:01,424
in the northern
hemisphere?
232
00:11:01,425 --> 00:11:05,895
Well, actually... Archie's invited
us up to the big house tonight.
233
00:11:07,097 --> 00:11:08,998
Oh.
234
00:11:10,100 --> 00:11:11,901
We don't have to go.
235
00:11:11,902 --> 00:11:14,704
Of course we have to go.
236
00:11:21,178 --> 00:11:24,514
One near birth and one
near crash later, here I am.
237
00:11:24,515 --> 00:11:27,082
And the black cab?
238
00:11:27,083 --> 00:11:29,585
- Belongs to Sean.
- Who is?
239
00:11:29,586 --> 00:11:32,888
My helpful and very heroic taxi driver.
240
00:11:32,889 --> 00:11:34,957
Right.
241
00:11:34,958 --> 00:11:37,092
So you're here
on your own then?
242
00:11:37,093 --> 00:11:39,729
You know me, Arch,
243
00:11:39,730 --> 00:11:41,997
always travel light.
244
00:11:43,066 --> 00:11:44,233
( pops )
245
00:11:48,472 --> 00:11:50,473
What do you think?
246
00:11:52,309 --> 00:11:54,109
Tastes cracking to me.
247
00:12:01,852 --> 00:12:04,019
That's an expensive
one then?
248
00:12:04,020 --> 00:12:05,688
Chateau La Touche, '64.
249
00:12:05,689 --> 00:12:07,990
I'm sure a man in
your line of business
250
00:12:07,991 --> 00:12:09,726
will appreciate
its caliber,
251
00:12:09,727 --> 00:12:12,562
the bouquet, the subtle
influence of strawberries.
252
00:12:13,964 --> 00:12:16,065
Aye, pretty good.
253
00:12:16,066 --> 00:12:18,234
How about a refill?
254
00:12:18,235 --> 00:12:19,869
Of course.
255
00:12:23,039 --> 00:12:24,574
So, uh...
256
00:12:24,575 --> 00:12:26,041
what firm do you
work for?
257
00:12:26,042 --> 00:12:27,943
It's just me
and my dad, really.
258
00:12:27,944 --> 00:12:29,579
- A family business?
- Yeah.
259
00:12:29,580 --> 00:12:32,382
- Lucrative?
- Well, it puts food on the table,
260
00:12:32,383 --> 00:12:33,983
and clothes
on the wee'uns.
261
00:12:33,984 --> 00:12:37,520
- Wee'uns?
- Bairns.
262
00:12:37,521 --> 00:12:39,789
Kids.
263
00:12:39,790 --> 00:12:41,557
Children?!
264
00:12:41,558 --> 00:12:44,994
Aye, three. I live with them
and their mother in Glasgow.
265
00:12:44,995 --> 00:12:47,329
And- and- Lizzie
knows about this?
266
00:12:47,330 --> 00:12:50,633
Sure. I told her all about
them on the way up here.
267
00:12:51,702 --> 00:12:53,836
So who do I speak to
about my money?
268
00:12:53,837 --> 00:12:56,539
- Your what?
- Aye, it's 173 quid.
269
00:12:56,540 --> 00:12:59,275
But seeing as you're doing
me bed and breakfast,
270
00:12:59,276 --> 00:13:01,010
we'll call it
150 for cash, eh?
271
00:13:01,011 --> 00:13:04,046
So your true color
is revealed.
272
00:13:04,047 --> 00:13:06,181
I'm sorry to have
to tell you,
273
00:13:06,182 --> 00:13:09,118
that the gravy train to
Glenbogle has just been derailed!
274
00:13:09,119 --> 00:13:11,821
Ahem. I've not got cash.
I can do you a check.
275
00:13:11,822 --> 00:13:13,556
Pay the bounder off,
Archie!
276
00:13:13,557 --> 00:13:15,157
Don't want his kind
around here.
277
00:13:15,158 --> 00:13:17,092
Father, Sean is
Lizzie's taxi driver.
278
00:13:17,093 --> 00:13:20,296
- He drove her up from Glasgow.
- Taxi driver?
279
00:13:21,632 --> 00:13:23,833
From Glasgow?!
280
00:13:23,834 --> 00:13:26,268
You won't be needing this,
for a start, will you?
281
00:13:33,977 --> 00:13:35,545
( insects buzzing )
282
00:13:37,948 --> 00:13:39,081
( groaning )
283
00:13:42,018 --> 00:13:44,353
Listen,
I'll tell you what,
284
00:13:44,354 --> 00:13:46,322
we'll have
a password, okay?
285
00:13:46,323 --> 00:13:48,658
If either of us'll say...
286
00:13:48,659 --> 00:13:51,026
I don't know...
rota rew are mod?
287
00:13:52,095 --> 00:13:55,665
- Kiwi fruit.
- Okay. Kiwi fruit it is.
288
00:13:55,666 --> 00:13:57,500
"Kiwi fruit-"
and off we shoot.
289
00:14:01,738 --> 00:14:05,040
- Hello, stranger!
- Lizzie! Look at you!
290
00:14:07,511 --> 00:14:09,946
- This is Fergal.
- I've heard all about you.
291
00:14:09,947 --> 00:14:11,981
- All good, I hope?
- Highly recommended.
292
00:14:11,982 --> 00:14:14,083
This is Lizzie,
Archie's sister.
293
00:14:14,084 --> 00:14:16,652
- big sister.
- Very big sister.
294
00:14:18,321 --> 00:14:21,023
If that cabbie isn't
the father, who is?
295
00:14:21,024 --> 00:14:22,892
We'll talk about it later, darling.
296
00:14:22,893 --> 00:14:25,394
- ( clinking crystal )
- Lexie: Speech!
297
00:14:27,764 --> 00:14:30,766
We were thinking of
something to give Fergal
298
00:14:30,767 --> 00:14:32,401
to thank him for
all his hard work
299
00:14:32,402 --> 00:14:34,303
in helping to turn
the estate around...
300
00:14:34,304 --> 00:14:36,405
apart from
a you-know-who.
301
00:14:36,406 --> 00:14:38,240
...and we came up
with these.
302
00:14:41,411 --> 00:14:44,413
A compass, so you won't
get lost on your travels.
303
00:14:46,082 --> 00:14:48,784
A stopwatch, so you'll
always be on time.
304
00:14:50,220 --> 00:14:52,321
And this...
305
00:14:52,322 --> 00:14:54,390
so you can open
a bottle of beer,
306
00:14:54,391 --> 00:14:57,693
while taking stones out of a
horse's hoof at the same time.
307
00:14:59,997 --> 00:15:01,163
Thank you, Archie.
308
00:15:01,164 --> 00:15:03,533
No, thank you.
Thanks for everything.
309
00:15:03,534 --> 00:15:05,434
( cheers )
310
00:15:09,006 --> 00:15:11,106
( insects swarming )
311
00:15:15,512 --> 00:15:17,547
Ugh- no!
312
00:15:19,816 --> 00:15:21,216
Guard it yourself!
313
00:15:23,420 --> 00:15:25,588
Hector:
So, there you are.
314
00:15:25,589 --> 00:15:27,823
I gather your young man
is not able to join us?
315
00:15:27,824 --> 00:15:29,358
That's right.
316
00:15:29,359 --> 00:15:32,595
I think we're entitled to meet
our prospective son-in-law.
317
00:15:32,596 --> 00:15:34,764
Hector, perhaps we
can talk about this later?
318
00:15:34,765 --> 00:15:37,166
Hector: Any sign of wedding
bells on the horizon,
319
00:15:37,167 --> 00:15:39,368
as an accompaniment
to a patter of tiny feet?
320
00:15:39,369 --> 00:15:41,871
- I don't think so. - Call me
old-fashioned if you'd like,
321
00:15:41,872 --> 00:15:43,839
but I believe a child
should have two parents,
322
00:15:43,840 --> 00:15:46,042
preferably of opposite gender,
and ideally, married.
323
00:15:46,043 --> 00:15:48,945
- He is married.
- I should hope- he's what?!
324
00:15:48,946 --> 00:15:51,180
We met in France
at a trade fair.
325
00:15:51,181 --> 00:15:52,982
One thing led to another.
326
00:15:52,983 --> 00:15:55,084
I think we can all see
what it led to.
327
00:15:55,085 --> 00:15:57,086
Up until two weeks ago,
I thought
328
00:15:57,087 --> 00:15:59,088
everything was going
to be okay.
329
00:15:59,089 --> 00:16:01,423
But now he's gone back
to his wife.
330
00:16:01,424 --> 00:16:04,359
- Why didn't you tell us?
- Because I knew how you'd react.
331
00:16:04,360 --> 00:16:06,228
What do you expect,
a pat on the back?
332
00:16:06,229 --> 00:16:08,030
Lizzie, darling,
don't upset yourself.
333
00:16:08,031 --> 00:16:11,333
- Hector, stop this at once! - You are
utterly irresponsible. Always have been.
334
00:16:11,334 --> 00:16:14,369
Getting yourself in this mess without
a thought of the effect on the family.
335
00:16:14,370 --> 00:16:16,138
That's all you care about,
isn't it?
336
00:16:16,139 --> 00:16:19,809
Who the father is? Whether I'm
polluting the great MacDonald gene pool?
337
00:16:19,810 --> 00:16:21,677
It's me that's having
the baby.
338
00:16:21,678 --> 00:16:24,213
If the father's not around-
I've rather got used
339
00:16:24,214 --> 00:16:27,516
to that state of affairs
over the past 30 years!
340
00:16:27,517 --> 00:16:29,685
How dare you speak like that
to your father!
341
00:16:29,686 --> 00:16:31,687
- Some father.
- What?!
342
00:16:31,688 --> 00:16:34,356
- Come on, Sean.
- Lizzie! I shall speak to you later.
343
00:16:36,793 --> 00:16:38,393
- Kiwi fruit.
- Kiwi fruit.
344
00:16:45,102 --> 00:16:47,870
I am so sorry you should
have seen us like this.
345
00:16:47,871 --> 00:16:50,572
Don't worry.
Goodbye, Molly.
346
00:16:57,213 --> 00:16:59,982
Are you sure you won't
stay for round two?
347
00:16:59,983 --> 00:17:02,317
I've got a busy day
tomorrow.
348
00:17:04,254 --> 00:17:06,355
I got you this-
349
00:17:07,590 --> 00:17:09,158
a pine cone?
350
00:17:09,159 --> 00:17:11,060
It's from the big fir
up on the hill.
351
00:17:11,061 --> 00:17:14,063
I was thinking about replanting
some of the ground spoor,
352
00:17:14,064 --> 00:17:16,032
and putting it back
to the way it was.
353
00:17:17,300 --> 00:17:20,002
That's a very lovely idea.
354
00:17:20,003 --> 00:17:23,172
I seem to remember it
was your very lovely idea.
355
00:17:25,642 --> 00:17:27,643
Right.
356
00:17:27,644 --> 00:17:30,445
- See you around, Arch.
- Have a good trip.
357
00:17:37,420 --> 00:17:39,588
Well...
358
00:17:39,589 --> 00:17:41,824
goodbye.
359
00:17:45,996 --> 00:17:47,863
Thanks for everything,
Katrina.
360
00:17:52,368 --> 00:17:54,503
Goodbye, Archie.
361
00:18:07,818 --> 00:18:10,385
Where do you think you're
going to, young lady?
362
00:18:10,386 --> 00:18:12,254
Sean's taking me
back to Glasgow.
363
00:18:12,255 --> 00:18:14,256
I think I might be a
wee bit over the limit.
364
00:18:14,257 --> 00:18:16,592
Kilwillie Castle, then.
365
00:18:16,593 --> 00:18:18,828
You're going
to Kilwillie's castle?
366
00:18:18,829 --> 00:18:20,529
That is treachery!
367
00:18:20,530 --> 00:18:23,733
- I'm sure he'll be more welcoming.
- Ho!
368
00:18:23,734 --> 00:18:26,802
"How sharper than
a serpent's tooth it is,
369
00:18:26,803 --> 00:18:29,839
to have
a thankless child. "
370
00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:31,841
Hector,
if you go on like this,
371
00:18:31,842 --> 00:18:34,309
I shall never, ever
speak to you again.
372
00:18:34,310 --> 00:18:36,645
Come on, Lizzie!
373
00:18:38,314 --> 00:18:40,515
Don't waste
your breath, mom,
374
00:18:40,516 --> 00:18:44,053
he obviously doesn't want
anything to do with his grandchild.
375
00:18:44,054 --> 00:18:47,156
Given my shortcomings
as a father,
376
00:18:47,157 --> 00:18:49,892
I should imagine that would
be a profound relief to you.
377
00:18:49,893 --> 00:18:53,162
Lizzie, there's a warm bed
waiting for you upstairs.
378
00:18:55,766 --> 00:18:57,833
She's impossible,
eh, Archie?
379
00:19:26,629 --> 00:19:28,597
I know what you're
going to say.
380
00:19:31,034 --> 00:19:32,768
You know what he's like.
381
00:19:32,769 --> 00:19:36,005
Snobbish, reactionary,
pigheaded!
382
00:19:36,006 --> 00:19:38,674
I'm 32 years old,
383
00:19:38,675 --> 00:19:41,677
and he can still wind me up
like nobody else.
384
00:19:41,678 --> 00:19:44,446
- He has his good points.
- Such as?!
385
00:19:44,447 --> 00:19:46,282
He's very- loyal.
386
00:19:46,283 --> 00:19:48,184
Not to me, he's not!
387
00:19:48,185 --> 00:19:50,986
Besides, I want more than that
from my father.
388
00:19:50,987 --> 00:19:53,122
Loyalty is something
you get from a dog!
389
00:19:56,459 --> 00:19:58,294
( sighs )
390
00:19:58,295 --> 00:20:00,262
( dogs whining )
391
00:20:08,038 --> 00:20:09,738
Ha!
392
00:20:09,739 --> 00:20:12,607
Et tu, Monty?
393
00:20:20,583 --> 00:20:23,085
I don't know what
I expected of him.
394
00:20:23,086 --> 00:20:26,288
Though unconditional love
wouldn't have been a bad start.
395
00:20:26,289 --> 00:20:28,623
I think you're going
to have to lower your sights.
396
00:20:28,624 --> 00:20:30,459
This is father
we're talking about.
397
00:20:30,460 --> 00:20:33,528
- right.
- He'll be fine.
398
00:20:33,529 --> 00:20:37,099
He just takes a little longer
to get there than the rest of us.
399
00:20:38,568 --> 00:20:40,236
In the meantime,
you have me.
400
00:20:43,073 --> 00:20:46,041
What did I do to deserve you
as little brother?
401
00:20:48,611 --> 00:20:51,513
You could have done without
me tonight, couldn't you?
402
00:20:51,514 --> 00:20:53,682
Don't be silly.
403
00:20:54,951 --> 00:20:57,719
So... how do you feel
about her going away?
404
00:20:59,455 --> 00:21:01,690
It's her decision.
405
00:21:03,260 --> 00:21:04,960
That's not
what I asked you.
406
00:21:06,930 --> 00:21:08,830
Besides,
it's too late now.
407
00:21:10,066 --> 00:21:12,001
I've lost her, Lizzie.
408
00:21:49,272 --> 00:21:52,041
I gather Kilwillie's tree
is simply enormous?
409
00:21:52,042 --> 00:21:53,675
What's that?!
410
00:21:53,676 --> 00:21:55,811
Molly: Don't bait your father, dear.
411
00:21:55,812 --> 00:21:57,813
He may be
an insufferable dinosaur,
412
00:21:57,814 --> 00:21:59,915
but there's no need
to stoop to his level.
413
00:21:59,916 --> 00:22:01,716
It's like teasing a child.
414
00:22:01,717 --> 00:22:04,086
Pass Lexie's burnt toast,
would you, dear?
415
00:22:04,087 --> 00:22:07,456
Molly: Do you know I had all
three of my children in this house,
416
00:22:07,457 --> 00:22:11,293
and Hector managed somehow not
to be here each and every time?
417
00:22:11,294 --> 00:22:14,096
I couldn't bear to see you suffer
- all that thrashing about.
418
00:22:14,097 --> 00:22:18,133
Molly: He was still in the reserves,
of course, when Jamie was born.
419
00:22:18,134 --> 00:22:20,369
- Posted overseas.
- Cheltenham.
420
00:22:20,370 --> 00:22:22,504
And then when you, Lizzie,
came along,
421
00:22:22,505 --> 00:22:25,807
he and Kilwillie went off
to the Royal Highland Show.
422
00:22:25,808 --> 00:22:29,911
Came back three days later-
still roaring drunk,
423
00:22:29,912 --> 00:22:31,713
with some kind of
combine harvester.
424
00:22:31,714 --> 00:22:34,716
Massey-Ferguson 340,
still in perfect working order.
425
00:22:34,717 --> 00:22:38,454
- I didn't think we did combine harvesting?
- We don't.
426
00:22:38,455 --> 00:22:42,057
And with Archie, I think we
managed to keep him home that time.
427
00:22:42,058 --> 00:22:44,659
Locked all the doors,
battened down the hatches.
428
00:22:44,660 --> 00:22:47,029
And then,
we found a rope ladder,
429
00:22:47,030 --> 00:22:49,198
hanging down
from the tower.
430
00:22:49,199 --> 00:22:51,766
Eventually got a phone call,
two days later,
431
00:22:51,767 --> 00:22:54,669
from a b&b in-
where was it again? Stromness.
432
00:22:54,670 --> 00:22:57,839
- Ullapool, actually, old darling.
- I'm not speaking to you.
433
00:22:59,376 --> 00:23:01,076
"Strathspey Gazette. "
434
00:23:01,077 --> 00:23:03,012
Ah. You made
the front page.
435
00:23:05,548 --> 00:23:07,383
Now then,
where are we-
436
00:23:07,384 --> 00:23:09,284
what's this?
437
00:23:09,285 --> 00:23:11,120
It's all about
bally trees!
438
00:23:11,121 --> 00:23:13,288
Nothing about your visitors'
center at all, Archie.
439
00:23:13,289 --> 00:23:15,724
And they spelt
my name wrong!
440
00:23:15,725 --> 00:23:18,027
And they say there's no
such thing as bad publicity.
441
00:23:18,028 --> 00:23:20,595
Hector, the tree-
sorry, breakfast.
442
00:23:20,596 --> 00:23:23,198
What is it, boy?
Spit it out!
443
00:23:23,199 --> 00:23:25,501
Somebody's chopped
the top of your tree off.
444
00:23:32,642 --> 00:23:33,842
Father.
445
00:23:34,911 --> 00:23:37,012
( all giggling )
446
00:23:37,013 --> 00:23:40,449
- Unspeakable bounder!
- You do not need the shotgun.
447
00:23:40,450 --> 00:23:43,318
- Come on, Golly, all hands on deck.
- What's happened?
448
00:23:43,319 --> 00:23:44,986
Sabotage!
449
00:23:51,627 --> 00:23:53,895
Oh, yes, I'm very
confident of victory.
450
00:23:53,896 --> 00:23:55,730
Wouldn't you agree,
William?
451
00:23:55,731 --> 00:23:57,166
Yes, sir.
452
00:23:58,601 --> 00:24:00,369
Kilwillie:
There she is.
453
00:24:00,370 --> 00:24:04,039
My Titan.
My Colossus.
454
00:24:14,350 --> 00:24:16,552
What have
they done to you?
455
00:24:23,726 --> 00:24:26,728
"Now cracks a noble heart. "
456
00:24:26,729 --> 00:24:29,631
( sobs )
457
00:24:29,632 --> 00:24:32,401
And vengeance
shall be mine!
458
00:24:38,007 --> 00:24:40,476
Please don't tell me
you've packed the coffee.
459
00:24:40,477 --> 00:24:42,211
Hello.
460
00:24:47,049 --> 00:24:49,585
I want to ask you
to be godmother.
461
00:24:51,221 --> 00:24:53,388
- Of course.
- look after the moral welfare
462
00:24:53,389 --> 00:24:56,091
of the child if I'm run over by a bus,
463
00:24:56,092 --> 00:24:59,060
in the absence of any
suitable paternal role models.
464
00:24:59,061 --> 00:25:01,430
Your dad'll come round.
465
00:25:01,431 --> 00:25:03,432
He's just worried
about you,
466
00:25:03,433 --> 00:25:06,235
about you bringing up
a child on your own.
467
00:25:06,236 --> 00:25:08,604
A lot he'd know about it, wouldn't he?
468
00:25:08,605 --> 00:25:10,339
Pack 'em off
to boarding school
469
00:25:10,340 --> 00:25:12,207
as soon as they're
out of nappies,
470
00:25:12,208 --> 00:25:14,510
that's his way of dealing with children.
471
00:25:14,511 --> 00:25:17,379
I left home when I was
seven, do you know that?
472
00:25:17,380 --> 00:25:19,615
You keep coming back,
though, don't you?
473
00:25:19,616 --> 00:25:22,184
Summer holidays,
Easter, Christmas-
474
00:25:22,185 --> 00:25:23,718
every chance
I could get.
475
00:25:23,719 --> 00:25:25,120
A sucker
for punishment.
476
00:25:27,357 --> 00:25:29,324
Now it's your turn
to leave home.
477
00:25:31,494 --> 00:25:34,095
Had to get out
before I hit 30.
478
00:25:34,096 --> 00:25:37,332
He really must have swept
you off your feet, lucky girl!
479
00:25:37,333 --> 00:25:39,934
It's all happened
so fast.
480
00:25:42,104 --> 00:25:43,639
Do you love him?
481
00:25:43,640 --> 00:25:45,407
Fergal?
482
00:25:46,709 --> 00:25:50,011
He's bright.
He's funny.
483
00:25:50,012 --> 00:25:52,281
He's got tons of energy.
484
00:25:52,282 --> 00:25:53,615
But?
485
00:25:55,718 --> 00:25:57,419
He's rootless.
486
00:25:58,988 --> 00:26:00,755
He doesn't
belong anywhere.
487
00:26:00,756 --> 00:26:02,191
And you do.
488
00:26:02,192 --> 00:26:04,293
Yes, I do.
489
00:26:05,562 --> 00:26:07,229
You can always come back.
490
00:26:07,230 --> 00:26:10,832
Summer holidays,
easter and Christmas?
491
00:26:12,802 --> 00:26:15,837
Stop me, if I'm being
completely dense here, but...
492
00:26:15,838 --> 00:26:19,341
this doesn't have anything
to do with Archie, does it?
493
00:26:23,213 --> 00:26:25,380
I just don't know
how it happened.
494
00:26:25,381 --> 00:26:27,849
Desertion was a court-martial
offense in my day.
495
00:26:27,850 --> 00:26:31,853
- What's the diagnosis? - Someone
has been up there with climbing spikes on,
496
00:26:31,854 --> 00:26:33,822
marks all over the tree.
497
00:26:33,823 --> 00:26:36,425
Duncan, Golly, saddle up.
We're going over the border.
498
00:26:36,426 --> 00:26:39,695
Ah ah ah. Do you not think there are
more important things to consider?
499
00:26:39,696 --> 00:26:42,698
Like your daughter? The imminent
arrival of your grandchild?
500
00:26:42,699 --> 00:26:45,867
There's plenty of time for
that later! This is war!
501
00:26:45,868 --> 00:26:48,036
( Archie sighs )
502
00:26:48,037 --> 00:26:50,472
I know you're trying
to be a good sister, Lizzie,
503
00:26:50,473 --> 00:26:53,842
but Archie's had months to say
something and he hasn't.
504
00:26:53,843 --> 00:26:57,379
- If he really cared about
me- - he's mad about you!
505
00:26:57,380 --> 00:26:59,914
He told me as much
last night.
506
00:26:59,915 --> 00:27:02,651
He doesn't want you to go.
507
00:27:02,652 --> 00:27:05,053
I don't want you to go.
508
00:27:05,054 --> 00:27:07,556
I think, in your heart of
hearts, you don't want to go.
509
00:27:07,557 --> 00:27:09,157
That's not true!
510
00:27:09,158 --> 00:27:12,193
You'd rather ride off into the
sunset with Fergal, would you?
511
00:27:12,194 --> 00:27:15,664
- Thousands of miles from home?
- Yes, I would.
512
00:27:15,665 --> 00:27:17,932
And you know why?
513
00:27:17,933 --> 00:27:20,101
Because he asked me to.
514
00:27:20,102 --> 00:27:23,705
He loves me and he wants me
to go with him.
515
00:27:23,706 --> 00:27:26,708
And pathetic as that sounds,
that makes me feel good.
516
00:27:28,177 --> 00:27:31,045
I'm not saying I've never
had feelings for Archie.
517
00:27:31,046 --> 00:27:33,515
I have.
518
00:27:33,516 --> 00:27:36,485
But what am I supposed to do
if he won't talk to me?
519
00:27:36,486 --> 00:27:37,719
Oh, god.
520
00:27:37,720 --> 00:27:39,788
Lizzie,
are you okay?
521
00:27:41,791 --> 00:27:44,526
I think the dress rehearsals
are over.
522
00:27:46,729 --> 00:27:48,497
Oh.
523
00:27:49,699 --> 00:27:51,166
Go on, man,
hit it.
524
00:27:51,167 --> 00:27:52,634
Lex, I've got to go.
525
00:27:52,635 --> 00:27:54,736
It's my dad's turn
with the cab today.
526
00:27:54,737 --> 00:27:57,706
- I can't do it, can I?
- And why not?
527
00:27:57,707 --> 00:27:59,408
'Cause shanty's
a man's game.
528
00:27:59,409 --> 00:28:01,643
I wish you'd blow
the final whistle then.
529
00:28:01,644 --> 00:28:02,944
( horn honking )
530
00:28:05,381 --> 00:28:07,882
Oh, looks like we're
into extra time!
531
00:28:07,883 --> 00:28:09,284
Golly!
532
00:28:18,361 --> 00:28:20,862
MacDonald!
533
00:28:20,863 --> 00:28:22,163
Kilwillie!
534
00:28:25,835 --> 00:28:28,870
So the two opposing camps
faced each other
535
00:28:28,871 --> 00:28:32,106
across the barren moor.
The blood lust was stirring.
536
00:28:32,107 --> 00:28:34,643
You always were
a devious little toe rag,
537
00:28:34,644 --> 00:28:36,812
but I never thought
you'd stoop to that!
538
00:28:36,813 --> 00:28:38,112
You're the scoundrel!
539
00:28:38,113 --> 00:28:39,314
En guarde!
540
00:28:39,315 --> 00:28:41,115
On guard yourself!
541
00:28:43,319 --> 00:28:45,821
A hit!
A very palpable hit!
542
00:28:45,822 --> 00:28:47,889
Nonsense, a scratch,
a mere scratch.
543
00:28:47,890 --> 00:28:50,258
Come on, that is enough-
ow! Stop it.
544
00:28:51,327 --> 00:28:52,828
Oh, I say!
You cheat!
545
00:28:52,829 --> 00:28:55,196
- Baldy!
- Stick insect!
546
00:28:55,197 --> 00:28:56,765
That is it!
547
00:28:56,766 --> 00:28:58,433
Consider our friendship over!
548
00:28:58,434 --> 00:29:00,301
I'm sure my bank manager
549
00:29:00,302 --> 00:29:02,270
will be delighted
to hear it!
550
00:29:02,271 --> 00:29:04,506
Come on, father.
551
00:29:13,349 --> 00:29:16,117
Mccrory: The blood of the
MacDonalds once more spilt
552
00:29:16,118 --> 00:29:17,686
on the heather
of Glenbogle.
553
00:29:17,687 --> 00:29:18,720
( sobbing )
554
00:29:18,721 --> 00:29:20,655
We need the midwife,
clean sheets,
555
00:29:20,656 --> 00:29:23,157
lots of hot water. Can
you make it up the stairs?
556
00:29:23,158 --> 00:29:25,293
- Absolutely not!
- Right, come on.
557
00:29:25,294 --> 00:29:28,162
I'm not going to give birth
on a billiard table!
558
00:29:28,163 --> 00:29:30,131
Then it better be the library. Come on.
559
00:29:30,132 --> 00:29:31,933
Stay calm. That's good, darling.
560
00:29:31,934 --> 00:29:33,702
Come on,
stay calm.
561
00:29:33,703 --> 00:29:35,203
Lizzie: oww!
562
00:29:36,739 --> 00:29:40,041
The arrogance! The
sheer vanity of the man!
563
00:29:40,042 --> 00:29:41,443
Yes, sir.
564
00:29:41,444 --> 00:29:44,178
You realise I have more
than 8,000 of these.
565
00:29:45,648 --> 00:29:47,649
How big is mine again?
566
00:29:50,386 --> 00:29:53,422
210' 8"
from base to tip, sir.
567
00:29:53,423 --> 00:29:56,124
Oh, well...
568
00:29:56,125 --> 00:29:57,592
we're clear
of the field...
569
00:29:57,593 --> 00:29:59,928
so far.
570
00:29:59,929 --> 00:30:02,063
'Cause there's no
two ways about it,
571
00:30:02,064 --> 00:30:04,466
I simply must win!
572
00:30:04,467 --> 00:30:07,268
Bit below the belt
there, I thought.
573
00:30:07,269 --> 00:30:09,704
You were both behaving
rather foolishly.
574
00:30:09,705 --> 00:30:11,440
I suppose so.
575
00:30:12,975 --> 00:30:15,844
I did my best with the estate, you know.
576
00:30:15,845 --> 00:30:18,079
Not much talent for business, though.
577
00:30:18,080 --> 00:30:20,315
Not much talent for anything, really.
578
00:30:20,316 --> 00:30:22,050
Not much of a father
either.
579
00:30:22,051 --> 00:30:23,785
Come on,
that's not true.
580
00:30:23,786 --> 00:30:26,455
Cut me to the quick when
young Lizzie said that.
581
00:30:26,456 --> 00:30:29,023
I thought fatherhood
was the one thing
582
00:30:29,024 --> 00:30:32,093
I haven't made
a complete bish of.
583
00:30:32,094 --> 00:30:35,163
You've turned out all
right, though, haven't you?
584
00:30:35,164 --> 00:30:37,065
I don't have
any complaints.
585
00:30:38,367 --> 00:30:40,535
I barely knew
my own father.
586
00:30:40,536 --> 00:30:42,771
Nanny used to look
after all the children.
587
00:30:42,772 --> 00:30:45,607
We'd come downstairs from
the nursery in our kilts,
588
00:30:45,608 --> 00:30:47,776
stand to attention,
speak when spoken to.
589
00:30:47,777 --> 00:30:50,512
I can't imagine your sister
putting up with that, eh?
590
00:30:50,513 --> 00:30:51,580
No.
591
00:30:51,581 --> 00:30:54,349
So you must've done
something right.
592
00:30:54,350 --> 00:30:57,118
Lizzie: Oh, do I have
to have that old thing?
593
00:30:57,119 --> 00:30:59,187
Yes, darling,
it's family tradition.
594
00:30:59,188 --> 00:31:01,222
Oh, god,
it's disgusting!
595
00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:06,728
The midwife won't be
here for at least an hour,
596
00:31:06,729 --> 00:31:09,731
so we're just gonna have
to make a start ourselves.
597
00:31:09,732 --> 00:31:10,899
Lizzie: no...
598
00:31:10,900 --> 00:31:13,034
- hot water?
- Check.
599
00:31:13,035 --> 00:31:14,536
- Towels?
- Check.
600
00:31:14,537 --> 00:31:17,271
- Rope?
- Rope?!
601
00:31:17,272 --> 00:31:19,173
You have done this
before, haven't you?
602
00:31:19,174 --> 00:31:21,810
I got three of my own
- ten, eight and four.
603
00:31:21,811 --> 00:31:24,045
Try and relax,
breathe deeply.
604
00:31:24,046 --> 00:31:25,046
Remember?
605
00:31:25,047 --> 00:31:26,715
( all breathe deeply )
606
00:31:26,716 --> 00:31:28,383
- Ooh...
- right?
607
00:31:28,384 --> 00:31:30,785
Whatever you say,
doctor.
608
00:31:30,786 --> 00:31:32,821
( Lizzie groans )
609
00:31:32,822 --> 00:31:34,689
Look, she came home,
didn't she?
610
00:31:34,690 --> 00:31:36,391
It can't have been
easy for her.
611
00:31:36,392 --> 00:31:39,594
It's not how I imagined things
turning out for the girl.
612
00:31:39,595 --> 00:31:42,330
I'm sure it's not how Lizzie
would have wanted it either,
613
00:31:42,331 --> 00:31:44,365
but she's just got
to put up with it.
614
00:31:44,366 --> 00:31:47,201
The least you can do is give
her a bit of moral support.
615
00:31:47,202 --> 00:31:50,338
I don't think she wants my
support. You heard what she said.
616
00:31:50,339 --> 00:31:53,508
She was angry and upset.
She didn't mean it.
617
00:31:53,509 --> 00:31:56,177
Look, she didn't
come home for the...
618
00:31:56,178 --> 00:31:58,947
dodgy electricity and
the leaky taps, did she?
619
00:31:58,948 --> 00:32:00,715
She came home to be
with the people
620
00:32:00,716 --> 00:32:02,851
who love her and who'll look after her.
621
00:32:02,852 --> 00:32:04,385
I'm sure
she'd want you there.
622
00:32:23,172 --> 00:32:26,507
What are you doing
with that, man?
623
00:32:26,508 --> 00:32:29,110
I'm keeping it out of the
clutches of that vandal.
624
00:32:29,111 --> 00:32:30,979
It's all valuable
evidence.
625
00:32:30,980 --> 00:32:34,583
I'd have thought 50 years of friendship
was all the evidence you'd need.
626
00:32:34,584 --> 00:32:37,351
I admire your loyalty, but
you're wasting your breath.
627
00:32:37,352 --> 00:32:39,420
It's an open
and shut case.
628
00:32:39,421 --> 00:32:42,791
Hector and Archie were at the house
all night. I can vouch for that.
629
00:32:42,792 --> 00:32:45,627
Duncan was where he shouldn't
have been, home in bed.
630
00:32:45,628 --> 00:32:49,030
I know I didn't do it.
So you tell me exactly
631
00:32:49,031 --> 00:32:51,600
how you work out
Hector is responsible.
632
00:32:51,601 --> 00:32:53,401
Oh, it's all
mere details!
633
00:32:53,402 --> 00:32:54,970
No, no.
Plain facts.
634
00:32:54,971 --> 00:32:58,406
If Hector isn't responsible,
then who the bally hell is?
635
00:33:01,744 --> 00:33:04,245
How much do you trust
your new man?
636
00:33:04,246 --> 00:33:05,981
Don't be ridiculous.
637
00:33:05,982 --> 00:33:08,984
He comes to me highly recommended.
He's utterly trustworthy!
638
00:33:08,985 --> 00:33:10,685
Is he?
639
00:33:13,555 --> 00:33:15,389
What do you make
of that?
640
00:33:18,427 --> 00:33:20,862
What do you make
of these, then?
641
00:33:20,863 --> 00:33:23,431
I'd say you owe Hector an apology.
642
00:33:23,432 --> 00:33:25,299
Wouldn't you?
643
00:33:27,870 --> 00:33:29,303
You're doing
brilliantly.
644
00:33:29,304 --> 00:33:31,239
He's certainly on the move, all right.
645
00:33:31,240 --> 00:33:33,108
I know.
I can feel him.
646
00:33:33,109 --> 00:33:35,243
That's right, darling,
let it out.
647
00:33:35,244 --> 00:33:37,578
I was just the same,
a real screamer.
648
00:33:37,579 --> 00:33:39,714
They used to say
they could hear me
649
00:33:39,715 --> 00:33:41,415
on the far side
of the loch. Come on.
650
00:33:41,416 --> 00:33:43,652
( Lizzie wailing )
651
00:33:52,461 --> 00:33:54,629
( Lizzie moaning )
652
00:33:54,630 --> 00:33:56,965
Go on. I think you
should make up with her
653
00:33:56,966 --> 00:33:58,466
before she
has the baby.
654
00:33:58,467 --> 00:34:00,535
Quite right, my boy.
Carpe diem.
655
00:34:01,603 --> 00:34:03,437
What should I say?
656
00:34:03,438 --> 00:34:05,406
Just tell her
that you love her.
657
00:34:05,407 --> 00:34:09,477
Lizzie: Will you get
that thing out of here?!
658
00:34:09,478 --> 00:34:12,113
There you are. You'll just have to wait.
659
00:34:12,114 --> 00:34:13,915
Girls only
at the moment.
660
00:34:23,793 --> 00:34:25,760
( Lizzie wailing )
661
00:34:27,129 --> 00:34:29,397
I thought you'd be
at the station by now.
662
00:34:29,398 --> 00:34:31,933
I've lost Katrina. You
haven't seen her, have you?
663
00:34:31,934 --> 00:34:33,434
Nor have heard her.
664
00:34:33,435 --> 00:34:35,036
( Lizzie wails loudly )
665
00:34:39,108 --> 00:34:42,177
Archie, I can't take this.
666
00:34:42,178 --> 00:34:43,745
( baby crying )
667
00:34:48,517 --> 00:34:51,285
It's the most beautiful thing
I have ever seen.
668
00:34:51,286 --> 00:34:53,154
Oh...
669
00:35:10,639 --> 00:35:12,340
I say...
670
00:35:12,341 --> 00:35:14,743
well done,
old girl.
671
00:35:14,744 --> 00:35:16,978
Say hello
to your grandfather.
672
00:35:16,979 --> 00:35:18,479
Isn't she
beautiful?
673
00:35:19,548 --> 00:35:21,015
They both are.
674
00:35:24,887 --> 00:35:27,321
And I will
always love them.
675
00:35:30,492 --> 00:35:32,127
Archie:
Well done, sis.
676
00:35:32,128 --> 00:35:34,095
Thanks, Arch.
677
00:35:34,096 --> 00:35:36,798
She certainly looks like
a MacDonald, doesn't she?
678
00:35:36,799 --> 00:35:38,733
( baby crying )
679
00:35:41,103 --> 00:35:44,272
Fergal: We've only got 15
minutes. We really have to go.
680
00:35:44,273 --> 00:35:46,775
I can't leave without
saying goodbye to Lizzie.
681
00:35:46,776 --> 00:35:48,910
Just give me
two seconds, okay?
682
00:35:55,684 --> 00:35:58,219
I thought
we'd lost you.
683
00:35:58,220 --> 00:36:00,155
Not quite yet.
684
00:36:00,156 --> 00:36:02,924
Then we'd better not
stand on ceremony.
685
00:36:03,993 --> 00:36:06,460
Say hello
to your godmother,
686
00:36:06,461 --> 00:36:08,062
Katrina.
687
00:36:10,565 --> 00:36:13,334
Hello,
Miss MacDonald.
688
00:36:14,569 --> 00:36:16,404
And to your godfather,
689
00:36:16,405 --> 00:36:18,039
Archie.
690
00:36:18,040 --> 00:36:19,640
But I'm already
an uncle.
691
00:36:19,641 --> 00:36:20,975
I don't care.
692
00:36:20,976 --> 00:36:24,112
I can't think of two better
people for my firstborn.
693
00:36:30,686 --> 00:36:32,987
She's so gorgeous.
694
00:36:36,992 --> 00:36:38,927
I have to run.
695
00:36:41,330 --> 00:36:43,664
I'm so proud of you.
696
00:36:48,437 --> 00:36:50,504
Take care of yourself.
697
00:36:50,505 --> 00:36:52,307
And the little one.
698
00:37:07,056 --> 00:37:08,756
Bye.
699
00:37:09,925 --> 00:37:11,159
Goodbye.
700
00:37:30,479 --> 00:37:32,313
What?
701
00:37:32,314 --> 00:37:34,382
She won't be much use
as a godmother
702
00:37:34,383 --> 00:37:36,751
if she's on the other side
of the world.
703
00:37:36,752 --> 00:37:39,587
No, she won't.
704
00:37:39,588 --> 00:37:41,256
Well then?
705
00:37:59,574 --> 00:38:00,942
She's gone.
706
00:38:00,943 --> 00:38:02,777
Go after her,
my boy.
707
00:38:02,778 --> 00:38:03,778
What?
708
00:38:03,779 --> 00:38:06,014
- Go on, Archie.
- What do I say?
709
00:38:06,015 --> 00:38:07,181
For goodness sake,
710
00:38:07,182 --> 00:38:08,883
both:
Tell her you love her!
711
00:38:58,167 --> 00:39:00,034
( panting )
712
00:39:02,438 --> 00:39:04,339
They've gone.
713
00:39:22,424 --> 00:39:26,727
( Lexie singing lullaby )
714
00:40:21,983 --> 00:40:23,751
Oh, Archie,
I'm so sorry.
715
00:40:23,752 --> 00:40:25,420
At least
you tried, my boy.
716
00:40:25,421 --> 00:40:27,155
At least
you tried.
717
00:40:39,368 --> 00:40:41,536
Oh, goodbye,
and thank you so much.
718
00:40:41,537 --> 00:40:42,803
Do call again.
719
00:40:42,804 --> 00:40:44,205
- See you.
- Bye.
720
00:40:46,741 --> 00:40:48,242
What's this?
721
00:40:48,243 --> 00:40:50,678
�173.50, wasn't it?
722
00:40:50,679 --> 00:40:52,080
No charge.
723
00:40:53,482 --> 00:40:56,584
You really are a very
nice man, aren't you?
724
00:40:56,585 --> 00:40:57,518
Thank you.
725
00:41:29,884 --> 00:41:31,452
You looking
for these?
726
00:41:39,027 --> 00:41:41,662
And you have no idea
where she is?
727
00:41:42,998 --> 00:41:45,866
She was upset all the
way down on the train.
728
00:41:45,867 --> 00:41:48,902
Leaving so quickly...
your sister...
729
00:41:48,903 --> 00:41:50,271
the baby...
730
00:41:52,007 --> 00:41:54,074
I tried to be...
731
00:41:54,075 --> 00:41:56,210
you know, sympathetic.
732
00:41:56,211 --> 00:41:59,046
She just wouldn't
speak to me.
733
00:41:59,047 --> 00:42:00,948
We ended up having a row.
734
00:42:02,184 --> 00:42:03,384
Our first row.
735
00:42:04,520 --> 00:42:06,787
I went to the bar...
736
00:42:06,788 --> 00:42:10,090
came back just as we
pulled into Edinburgh.
737
00:42:10,091 --> 00:42:13,494
- She'd gone.
- Gone?
738
00:42:13,495 --> 00:42:15,696
Thought she might've
come back here.
739
00:42:15,697 --> 00:42:19,867
I don't think she really wanted
to leave in the first place.
740
00:42:19,868 --> 00:42:20,868
You know?
741
00:42:20,869 --> 00:42:23,471
To be honest...
742
00:42:23,472 --> 00:42:25,939
I don't know if
what she feels for me...
743
00:42:25,940 --> 00:42:28,576
or what she felt...
744
00:42:30,045 --> 00:42:31,912
was enough.
745
00:42:33,682 --> 00:42:35,149
So what are you
gonna do?
746
00:42:35,150 --> 00:42:37,885
I've got a ticket
to New Zealand...
747
00:42:37,886 --> 00:42:40,621
job waiting for me...
748
00:42:40,622 --> 00:42:43,023
another new life.
749
00:42:43,024 --> 00:42:45,359
If she loves me...
750
00:42:45,360 --> 00:42:47,728
she'll come after me.
751
00:42:49,531 --> 00:42:51,965
Are you sure you didn't
say anything to her?
752
00:42:51,966 --> 00:42:53,401
No.
753
00:42:54,836 --> 00:42:56,837
But I wish I had.
754
00:43:47,256 --> 00:43:49,990
Hector: Ahh, doesn't
want to go beddy-bye...
755
00:43:49,991 --> 00:43:53,394
- your grandpa will-
- uncanny, isn't it?
756
00:43:53,395 --> 00:43:56,264
The way they all manage to
look like Winston Churchill.
757
00:43:59,368 --> 00:44:02,503
Hector, I've been
a damn fool.
758
00:44:02,504 --> 00:44:05,539
We both have.
759
00:44:05,540 --> 00:44:08,709
I said a few things that
I shouldn't have, old chap.
760
00:44:08,710 --> 00:44:10,010
In the heat of the moment.
761
00:44:10,011 --> 00:44:11,545
Quite.
762
00:44:11,546 --> 00:44:13,180
That damn new ghillie
of mine...
763
00:44:13,181 --> 00:44:15,783
I swear to you, Hector, I
didn't know anything about it.
764
00:44:15,784 --> 00:44:19,153
I knew that even you
wouldn't stoop that low.
765
00:44:19,154 --> 00:44:22,222
He came highly recommended
by Tubby Mclnver.
766
00:44:22,223 --> 00:44:23,891
I can't understand it!
767
00:44:25,294 --> 00:44:27,795
The truth is...
I was jealous.
768
00:44:27,796 --> 00:44:28,929
Jealous of who?
769
00:44:28,930 --> 00:44:30,798
- Of you.
- Of me? Why?
770
00:44:30,799 --> 00:44:32,767
You've got it all,
old boy.
771
00:44:32,768 --> 00:44:34,635
A beautiful,
charming wife,
772
00:44:34,636 --> 00:44:37,705
young Archie turning
the estate around- look at me.
773
00:44:37,706 --> 00:44:40,007
I've got no son and heir
774
00:44:40,008 --> 00:44:42,543
ready to look after the place
when I'm gone.
775
00:44:44,045 --> 00:44:46,113
Kilwillie...
776
00:44:46,114 --> 00:44:48,182
give me your hand.
777
00:44:49,318 --> 00:44:51,385
Are we friends then?
778
00:44:51,386 --> 00:44:52,720
Absolutely.
779
00:44:53,888 --> 00:44:55,423
What about the, uh...
780
00:44:56,491 --> 00:44:58,392
it's only a tree.
781
00:44:58,393 --> 00:45:00,127
As you say.
782
00:45:00,128 --> 00:45:01,696
It's only a tree.
783
00:45:08,837 --> 00:45:10,438
Oh.
784
00:45:10,439 --> 00:45:12,005
Thanks, old man.
785
00:45:12,006 --> 00:45:13,641
There we go.
786
00:45:13,642 --> 00:45:15,643
- I've got it.
- Can you manage?
787
00:45:15,644 --> 00:45:16,844
- Yeah.
- Excellent.
788
00:45:16,845 --> 00:45:19,012
Hot off the press.
789
00:45:20,682 --> 00:45:22,550
The result
of the competition
790
00:45:22,551 --> 00:45:24,518
organised
by the Woodland Trust
791
00:45:24,519 --> 00:45:27,755
to find the tallest tree
in Scotland is as follows:
792
00:45:27,756 --> 00:45:29,156
The Kilwillie tree,
793
00:45:29,157 --> 00:45:31,024
or what remains of it-
794
00:45:31,025 --> 00:45:34,261
203' 6".
795
00:45:34,262 --> 00:45:35,896
Hurrah!
796
00:45:35,897 --> 00:45:37,931
The MacDonald tree,
797
00:45:37,932 --> 00:45:39,233
203 feet.
798
00:45:39,234 --> 00:45:41,201
Inches, man,
inches!
799
00:45:41,202 --> 00:45:42,903
203 feet,
800
00:45:42,904 --> 00:45:44,372
precisely.
801
00:45:44,373 --> 00:45:46,106
Ha ha!
802
00:45:46,107 --> 00:45:47,941
Oh, never mind,
old man.
803
00:45:47,942 --> 00:45:49,477
It's only a tree.
804
00:45:51,279 --> 00:45:53,581
Isn't that Tubby Mclnver over there?
805
00:45:53,582 --> 00:45:55,483
Yes.
806
00:45:55,484 --> 00:45:58,151
But... he's the chap
who recommended-
807
00:45:58,152 --> 00:46:01,288
- Billy the ghillie!
- Mccrory: so, with all competitors
808
00:46:01,289 --> 00:46:02,690
duly taken into account,
809
00:46:02,691 --> 00:46:05,359
it's now my final duty
to announce a winner.
810
00:46:05,360 --> 00:46:07,395
A fine specimen
of scottus pinas
811
00:46:07,396 --> 00:46:10,197
from the estate of
Lord Mclnver of Kilkern.
812
00:46:10,198 --> 00:46:11,198
Both: What?
813
00:46:12,801 --> 00:46:14,902
I could have told you
that Mclnver
814
00:46:14,903 --> 00:46:16,970
was a complete
and utter scoundrel!
815
00:46:16,971 --> 00:46:19,139
That's all very well,
Hector.
816
00:46:19,140 --> 00:46:20,541
What the bally Moses
817
00:46:20,542 --> 00:46:22,376
am I gonna do with these?
818
00:46:24,145 --> 00:46:27,882
How am I supposed to market the
second tallest tree in Scotland?
819
00:46:28,983 --> 00:46:30,618
Ah.
820
00:46:32,320 --> 00:46:34,988
Hector:
Wherever you roam,
821
00:46:34,989 --> 00:46:37,157
whatever path
you choose to take,
822
00:46:37,158 --> 00:46:39,794
this place will
always be your home,
823
00:46:39,795 --> 00:46:42,930
and this family will
always be your family.
824
00:46:42,931 --> 00:46:45,198
And that goes for you too, young lady.
825
00:46:45,199 --> 00:46:47,067
Thank you, daddy.
826
00:46:47,068 --> 00:46:48,936
Don't suppose you
can tear yourself away
827
00:46:48,937 --> 00:46:50,771
from the bright lights
of London?
828
00:46:50,772 --> 00:46:52,706
You could always come
and visit us, daddy.
829
00:46:52,707 --> 00:46:54,608
I could use
a cheap babysitter.
830
00:46:56,678 --> 00:46:58,446
Present the quaiche.
831
00:46:58,447 --> 00:46:59,947
The quaiche.
832
00:47:07,589 --> 00:47:10,023
This silver quaiche,
833
00:47:10,024 --> 00:47:11,859
engraved with the family motto...
834
00:47:11,860 --> 00:47:13,494
"takes one
to know one. "
835
00:47:13,495 --> 00:47:16,997
Has been handed down through
generations of MacDonalds.
836
00:47:16,998 --> 00:47:19,066
We use it again
today
837
00:47:19,067 --> 00:47:21,234
to bless
the arrival of-
838
00:47:21,235 --> 00:47:23,737
hang on... we don't have
a name for her yet, do we?
839
00:47:23,738 --> 00:47:24,872
Martha.
840
00:47:24,873 --> 00:47:27,207
Martha,
my mother's name!
841
00:47:27,208 --> 00:47:29,109
Thank you, Lizzie.
842
00:47:29,110 --> 00:47:30,845
Don't drop her,
will you?
843
00:47:30,846 --> 00:47:33,013
Would I drop
my own granddaughter?
844
00:47:38,487 --> 00:47:40,320
Thank you, Golly.
845
00:47:42,423 --> 00:47:44,492
Dearest Martha,
846
00:47:44,493 --> 00:47:46,961
we welcome you.
847
00:47:46,962 --> 00:47:50,297
Take your place on
god's good green earth.
848
00:47:50,298 --> 00:47:52,500
Play your part
in the...
849
00:47:52,501 --> 00:47:54,434
circle of life?
850
00:47:55,570 --> 00:47:57,872
Very good, Lexie, yes!
851
00:47:57,873 --> 00:48:00,674
The circle of life.
852
00:48:00,675 --> 00:48:02,710
Welcome to Glenbogle,
853
00:48:02,711 --> 00:48:04,411
Martha MacDonald.
854
00:48:04,412 --> 00:48:07,014
All:
Martha MacDonald.
855
00:48:07,015 --> 00:48:09,316
Jolly good show, what.
856
00:48:14,756 --> 00:48:16,724
( theme music playing )
857
00:48:16,774 --> 00:48:21,324
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