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1
00:00:02,913 --> 00:00:04,540
[ Birds Chirping ]
2
00:00:06,484 --> 00:00:07,951
Let me go!
3
00:00:08,018 --> 00:00:09,110
Get off it!
4
00:00:09,186 --> 00:00:10,312
I can't breathe.
5
00:00:10,387 --> 00:00:11,376
Ow!
6
00:00:11,455 --> 00:00:13,286
[ Crashing ]
7
00:00:17,027 --> 00:00:19,291
[ Loud Arguing ]
8
00:00:29,740 --> 00:00:30,934
[ Glass Breaking ]
9
00:00:31,008 --> 00:00:33,943
[ Snoring ]
10
00:00:34,011 --> 00:00:38,277
Leave the squirrel alone
and get the fire extinguisher.
11
00:00:38,349 --> 00:00:39,281
Reese, no!
12
00:00:39,350 --> 00:00:42,808
[ Crashing ]
13
00:00:42,887 --> 00:00:44,252
Blood tastes funny.
14
00:00:44,321 --> 00:00:46,289
You better be naked
when I get back.
15
00:00:46,357 --> 00:00:47,881
Done.
16
00:00:49,527 --> 00:00:52,394
?? Yes, no, maybe??
17
00:00:52,463 --> 00:00:54,931
??I don't know??
18
00:00:54,999 --> 00:00:58,264
?? Can you repeat the question???
19
00:00:58,335 --> 00:01:00,530
?? You're not the boss of me now??
20
00:01:00,604 --> 00:01:02,936
?? You're not the boss of me now??
21
00:01:03,007 --> 00:01:05,305
?? You're not the boss of me now??
22
00:01:05,376 --> 00:01:07,367
??And you're not so big??
23
00:01:07,444 --> 00:01:09,878
?? You're not the boss of me now??
24
00:01:09,947 --> 00:01:11,881
?? You're not the boss of me now??
25
00:01:11,949 --> 00:01:14,383
?? You're not the boss of me now??
26
00:01:14,451 --> 00:01:17,181
??And you're not so big??
27
00:01:17,254 --> 00:01:21,884
??Life is unfair????
28
00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:24,689
[ Reese, Softly ]
Malcolm...
29
00:01:24,762 --> 00:01:27,094
Malcolm...
30
00:01:28,566 --> 00:01:29,555
[ Screaming ]
31
00:01:31,068 --> 00:01:33,195
How was that even remotely fair?
32
00:01:33,270 --> 00:01:36,364
That's for us all having to go
to your stupid Krelboyne picnic today.
33
00:01:36,440 --> 00:01:38,431
You think I want you to go?
34
00:01:40,678 --> 00:01:44,614
My special class is having a family day
and, if that's not bad enough,
35
00:01:44,682 --> 00:01:47,048
it's on the weekend
that Francis is home.
36
00:01:47,117 --> 00:01:50,245
I'm going to look like
a total idiot in front of him.
37
00:01:50,321 --> 00:01:53,552
Pretty bunnies.
38
00:01:53,624 --> 00:01:55,558
Pretty bunnies.
39
00:01:55,626 --> 00:01:59,062
Luckily, I've got a brilliant plan
to get out of this.
40
00:01:59,129 --> 00:02:01,393
[ Gagging ]
41
00:02:01,465 --> 00:02:04,764
Oh, poor baby.
42
00:02:04,835 --> 00:02:07,565
Yeah, I'm sick.
43
00:02:07,638 --> 00:02:09,606
No, you're grounded for pouring...
44
00:02:09,673 --> 00:02:11,698
perfectly good vegetable soup
in the toilet...
45
00:02:11,775 --> 00:02:14,039
and you owe me 49 cents.
46
00:02:14,111 --> 00:02:15,874
[ Flushing ]
47
00:02:17,915 --> 00:02:19,780
I don't understand
why you don't want to go...
48
00:02:19,850 --> 00:02:22,148
to this picnic, Malcolm;
I think it sounds like fun.
49
00:02:22,219 --> 00:02:24,016
Yeah, sitting on the grass,
eating barbecue.
50
00:02:24,088 --> 00:02:25,282
It's Krelboyne.
51
00:02:25,356 --> 00:02:28,052
It's not going to be on the grass
because half the class is allergic...
52
00:02:28,125 --> 00:02:29,922
and don't expect any meat either,
53
00:02:29,994 --> 00:02:33,794
because they all voted not to serve
anything that ever had a mother.
54
00:02:33,864 --> 00:02:36,025
Cousin Nancy doesn't have a mother.
55
00:02:36,100 --> 00:02:38,432
That's right.
She has two daddies.
56
00:02:38,502 --> 00:02:40,493
Oh, man,
two guys as your parents?
57
00:02:40,571 --> 00:02:43,199
That house has got to be
a dude's paradise.
58
00:02:43,273 --> 00:02:46,731
You know, there are a lotof proven health benefits...
59
00:02:46,810 --> 00:02:48,539
to the vegetarian lifestyle.
60
00:02:48,612 --> 00:02:51,479
In fact, I've been seriously
considering it myself.
61
00:02:51,548 --> 00:02:53,209
It'll be nice to meetthe other parents.
62
00:02:53,283 --> 00:02:56,309
I'm sure they're better than
the carnival freaks in Reese's class.
63
00:02:56,387 --> 00:02:57,911
What a horrible bunch of people.
64
00:02:57,988 --> 00:02:59,455
Amen to that.
65
00:02:59,523 --> 00:03:01,923
Well, this just sounds
like a blast to me.
66
00:03:01,992 --> 00:03:03,584
Why do I have to go, again?
67
00:03:03,661 --> 00:03:05,288
Because it's a family picnic, Francis,
68
00:03:05,362 --> 00:03:06,829
and you're a member
of this family.
69
00:03:06,897 --> 00:03:09,525
Right, see, I just keep forgetting
that, being forced to live...
70
00:03:09,600 --> 00:03:11,693
a thousand miles away
at military school and all.
71
00:03:11,769 --> 00:03:14,135
Well, I can't wait to see
this academic circus.
72
00:03:14,204 --> 00:03:15,501
I bet it's really cute.
73
00:03:15,572 --> 00:03:16,869
It's not a circus.
74
00:03:16,940 --> 00:03:19,807
It's a bunch of social misfits
doing a bunch of weird stunts...
75
00:03:19,877 --> 00:03:21,367
to show off how smart they are.
76
00:03:21,445 --> 00:03:22,969
What's your weird stunt, honey?
77
00:03:23,047 --> 00:03:25,845
Just some lame thing--
nothing you want to see.
78
00:03:25,916 --> 00:03:29,044
You've got to get me out of there
before my turn comes.
79
00:03:29,119 --> 00:03:30,518
Why? What's the big deal?
80
00:03:30,587 --> 00:03:31,952
It just is, okay?
81
00:03:32,022 --> 00:03:33,512
I don't want to do my act.
82
00:03:33,590 --> 00:03:35,251
All right, relax.
83
00:03:35,325 --> 00:03:38,590
We'll hang out for like 1 5 minutes,
establish your presence,
84
00:03:38,662 --> 00:03:41,722
then we'll go over the fence
like at Grandma's wedding.
85
00:03:41,799 --> 00:03:43,061
[ Sighs ]
86
00:03:43,133 --> 00:03:44,828
That's why I love this guy.
87
00:03:44,902 --> 00:03:47,462
Welcome!
88
00:03:47,538 --> 00:03:48,800
Welcome, one and all!
89
00:03:48,872 --> 00:03:51,864
Run away with us
and join the circus!
90
00:03:51,942 --> 00:03:54,342
The academic circus!
91
00:03:54,411 --> 00:03:55,537
Oh, no.
92
00:03:55,612 --> 00:03:56,704
My teacher.
93
00:03:56,780 --> 00:03:58,270
Malcolm, thank goodness.
94
00:03:58,348 --> 00:03:59,815
I was so nervous.
95
00:03:59,883 --> 00:04:01,817
I had a dream you didn't come,
and I was...
96
00:04:01,885 --> 00:04:05,286
being chased by something big
but invisible and-- Never mind.
97
00:04:05,355 --> 00:04:07,448
You're here,
and that's all that matters.
98
00:04:08,826 --> 00:04:11,124
Hello, little guy.
99
00:04:12,863 --> 00:04:15,331
Ready to leave your family
and join the circus?
100
00:04:16,266 --> 00:04:17,665
- Oh.
- Huh?
101
00:04:17,735 --> 00:04:18,997
Little lower, son.
102
00:04:20,437 --> 00:04:22,837
Oh, look at all
your little friends.
103
00:04:22,906 --> 00:04:23,964
Hi.
104
00:04:24,041 --> 00:04:25,303
Hi there.
105
00:04:25,375 --> 00:04:26,706
They're not my friends.
106
00:04:26,777 --> 00:04:28,972
They're a bunch
of geeks and losers.
107
00:04:29,046 --> 00:04:30,070
Malcolm's in the house!
108
00:04:30,147 --> 00:04:31,671
Malcolm! Malcolm!
109
00:04:31,749 --> 00:04:34,946
Malcolm! Malcolm! Malcolm!
110
00:04:35,018 --> 00:04:37,851
Malcolm! Malcolm!
Malcolm! Malcolm!
111
00:04:37,921 --> 00:04:40,321
Malcolm! Malcolm!
112
00:04:40,390 --> 00:04:43,291
I'm going to kick
so much Krelboyne ass today...
113
00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:44,725
it's not even funny.
114
00:04:44,795 --> 00:04:47,992
Go, Malcolm! Go, Malcolm!
Go, Malcolm!
115
00:04:48,065 --> 00:04:49,191
Easy.
116
00:04:49,266 --> 00:04:50,961
You got all afternoon.
117
00:04:51,034 --> 00:04:54,299
We're getting out of here
in 1 5 minutes, right?
118
00:04:54,371 --> 00:04:55,565
Make it ten.
119
00:04:55,639 --> 00:04:56,765
Yeah...
120
00:04:56,840 --> 00:04:58,432
Ooh, hello.
121
00:05:00,010 --> 00:05:02,035
[ Francis ]And who might you be?
122
00:05:02,112 --> 00:05:02,976
What?
123
00:05:03,046 --> 00:05:04,240
Nothing.
124
00:05:11,388 --> 00:05:13,481
Hello. I'm Lois. This is Hal.
125
00:05:13,557 --> 00:05:15,115
We're Malcolm's parents.
126
00:05:15,192 --> 00:05:17,057
That's very nice.
127
00:05:17,127 --> 00:05:19,595
I'm Dorene.
These are the girls.
128
00:05:19,663 --> 00:05:20,789
Hello, nice to meet you.
129
00:05:20,864 --> 00:05:21,853
Yeah, it's really...
130
00:05:25,969 --> 00:05:27,163
Whatever.
131
00:05:28,438 --> 00:05:30,235
Hope everybody likes brownies.
132
00:05:30,307 --> 00:05:32,332
Oh, my,
that is so thoughtful.
133
00:05:32,409 --> 00:05:33,433
Are those nuts?
134
00:05:33,510 --> 00:05:34,442
Walnuts.
135
00:05:34,511 --> 00:05:36,672
Oh... gee...
we can't have that.
136
00:05:36,747 --> 00:05:40,080
Some of the children
are severely allergic to nuts.
137
00:05:40,150 --> 00:05:41,549
Oh, my gosh, I had no idea.
138
00:05:41,618 --> 00:05:42,778
Whose child is allergic?
139
00:05:42,853 --> 00:05:45,117
Well, no one
in this class specifically,
140
00:05:45,189 --> 00:05:47,020
but you can never
be too careful.
141
00:05:56,333 --> 00:05:59,325
Believe me, this isn't meant
to publicly humiliate you.
142
00:05:59,403 --> 00:06:03,066
I'm sure they were delicious.
143
00:06:03,140 --> 00:06:05,267
Oh, hi, fellas.
144
00:06:05,342 --> 00:06:06,434
Hey there.
145
00:06:06,510 --> 00:06:10,105
What's your pleasure--
nature dog, health patty, tofu square?
146
00:06:10,180 --> 00:06:12,273
Good God.
147
00:06:12,349 --> 00:06:15,648
Want me to brown that chicken leg
a little more for you?
148
00:06:17,020 --> 00:06:19,511
Well...
149
00:06:19,590 --> 00:06:21,854
looks like I got here
just in time.
150
00:06:23,260 --> 00:06:25,524
Gentlemen...
151
00:06:25,596 --> 00:06:27,655
behold.
152
00:06:29,032 --> 00:06:30,499
Is that...
153
00:06:30,567 --> 00:06:31,556
meat?
154
00:06:31,635 --> 00:06:33,330
Nothing but.
155
00:06:39,009 --> 00:06:40,271
Hi.
156
00:06:40,344 --> 00:06:42,073
Hey.
157
00:06:45,182 --> 00:06:46,615
So, uh...
158
00:06:46,683 --> 00:06:48,207
you here?
159
00:06:48,285 --> 00:06:50,753
Yeah.
160
00:06:50,821 --> 00:06:51,753
You?
161
00:06:51,822 --> 00:06:53,551
Yeah.
162
00:06:59,596 --> 00:07:00,927
Hey, Stevie.
163
00:07:00,998 --> 00:07:02,989
[ Panting ]
Can't stop... to chat.
164
00:07:03,066 --> 00:07:05,330
Got to get... my chemicals...
165
00:07:05,402 --> 00:07:06,994
in the shade.
166
00:07:07,070 --> 00:07:09,436
I thought you were doing
your report on oscilloscopes.
167
00:07:09,506 --> 00:07:11,838
Changed to... catalytics.
168
00:07:11,909 --> 00:07:13,774
It's more... exciting.
169
00:07:13,844 --> 00:07:15,573
Right?
170
00:07:15,646 --> 00:07:17,170
What do you care?
171
00:07:17,247 --> 00:07:18,214
I'm up...
172
00:07:18,282 --> 00:07:19,374
after you.
173
00:07:19,449 --> 00:07:20,211
So?
174
00:07:20,284 --> 00:07:22,309
Following you...
175
00:07:22,386 --> 00:07:24,013
is like...
176
00:07:24,087 --> 00:07:25,418
following Streisand.
177
00:07:25,489 --> 00:07:26,854
Well, don't worry about it.
178
00:07:26,924 --> 00:07:28,255
You won't be following me.
179
00:07:29,626 --> 00:07:30,558
Why?
180
00:07:30,627 --> 00:07:33,187
Have I been... bumped?
181
00:07:35,098 --> 00:07:36,759
Francis, what are you doing?!
182
00:07:36,833 --> 00:07:38,630
Come on,
the coast is clear and...
183
00:07:38,702 --> 00:07:40,966
it's already been ten minutes and--
184
00:07:43,307 --> 00:07:45,537
We're not ditching out, are we?
185
00:07:55,085 --> 00:07:57,781
[ Children Conversing, Indistinct ]
186
00:08:02,292 --> 00:08:04,886
A small pack of Krelboynes
has ventured out of hiding...
187
00:08:04,962 --> 00:08:06,327
to bask in the afternoon sun.
188
00:08:06,396 --> 00:08:08,091
Their defenses down,
189
00:08:08,165 --> 00:08:10,633
they're an easy target
for nearby predators.
190
00:08:10,701 --> 00:08:16,139
[ Sniffing ]
191
00:08:17,841 --> 00:08:19,900
They sense danger,but it is too late.
192
00:08:19,977 --> 00:08:22,309
Their hesitation is fatal.
193
00:08:22,379 --> 00:08:24,370
[ Roaring ]
194
00:08:24,448 --> 00:08:26,712
[ Frightened Yelps ]
195
00:08:37,961 --> 00:08:39,986
[ Panting ]
196
00:08:40,063 --> 00:08:42,793
And the circle of life goes on.
197
00:08:51,575 --> 00:08:53,270
Kafkaesque, isn't it?
198
00:08:53,343 --> 00:08:54,503
Huh?
199
00:08:54,578 --> 00:08:55,510
Never mind.
200
00:08:55,579 --> 00:08:57,604
Kick his butt, Alphonse.
201
00:09:01,952 --> 00:09:05,183
Wait... wait.
202
00:09:05,255 --> 00:09:06,779
Here it comes.
203
00:09:06,857 --> 00:09:08,415
Yes, there!
204
00:09:08,492 --> 00:09:10,892
I've arrested the cellular mitosis!
205
00:09:16,133 --> 00:09:17,122
Thank you, Dabney.
206
00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:18,224
That was riveting.
207
00:09:18,301 --> 00:09:20,235
Our next act needs no introduction,
208
00:09:20,303 --> 00:09:22,965
having been the buzz
of last year's math fair.
209
00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:25,668
Please welcome Flora Mayesh...
210
00:09:25,742 --> 00:09:28,734
and Fermat's Last Theorem!
211
00:09:30,847 --> 00:09:32,109
Hello? Is this...?
212
00:09:32,182 --> 00:09:33,513
Testing.
213
00:09:33,583 --> 00:09:37,383
So, I understand that Malcolm
has quite the vocabulary.
214
00:09:37,454 --> 00:09:40,184
Yeah, he's just yap, yap,
yap, yap, yap all day long.
215
00:09:40,257 --> 00:09:42,521
Well, that's not
the vocabulary I meant.
216
00:09:42,592 --> 00:09:43,923
It seems that he's taught...
217
00:09:43,994 --> 00:09:45,962
several of the children
the ''R'' word.
218
00:09:46,029 --> 00:09:47,428
The ''R'' word?
219
00:09:47,497 --> 00:09:50,933
I'm sure it's just something
he picked up off the street--
220
00:09:51,001 --> 00:09:52,366
certainly not at home.
221
00:09:52,436 --> 00:09:55,530
Yeah, well, ''R'' you, lady.
222
00:09:59,342 --> 00:10:01,003
So, this is going well, right?
223
00:10:01,078 --> 00:10:03,638
It's pretty much
everything I expected.
224
00:10:03,713 --> 00:10:04,941
So, you ready, Malcolm?
225
00:10:05,015 --> 00:10:06,539
I mean, you're all set, right?
226
00:10:06,616 --> 00:10:07,708
Sure.
227
00:10:07,784 --> 00:10:09,183
Good.
228
00:10:11,221 --> 00:10:13,849
I'm... ready.
229
00:10:13,924 --> 00:10:16,518
Thanks for... asking.
230
00:10:16,593 --> 00:10:19,255
You know what's so great
about our relationship?
231
00:10:19,329 --> 00:10:22,196
It just still feels so fresh,
you know what I mean?
232
00:10:22,265 --> 00:10:23,197
Totally.
233
00:10:23,266 --> 00:10:24,392
All right, take it away.
234
00:10:24,468 --> 00:10:26,959
I need two burgers and a dog, Hal.
235
00:10:27,037 --> 00:10:29,528
Coming up. Dewey?
236
00:10:30,707 --> 00:10:31,765
Thank you, sir.
237
00:10:31,842 --> 00:10:33,309
All right. Thank you.
238
00:10:33,376 --> 00:10:35,071
What have I told you
about raw meat, son?
239
00:10:35,145 --> 00:10:37,613
I'm not.
240
00:10:37,681 --> 00:10:39,706
Dad, I want you to meet someone.
241
00:10:39,783 --> 00:10:40,715
This is Jody.
242
00:10:40,784 --> 00:10:41,808
Hi.
243
00:10:41,885 --> 00:10:43,876
Oh, it's so great
to finally meet you.
244
00:10:43,954 --> 00:10:46,047
Francis talks about you
all the time.
245
00:10:46,123 --> 00:10:48,057
Oh, yeah?
246
00:10:48,125 --> 00:10:49,251
You, too.
247
00:10:51,628 --> 00:10:52,617
Oh...
248
00:10:52,696 --> 00:10:54,129
I'm so glad that went well.
249
00:10:54,197 --> 00:10:57,462
Ladies and gentlemen,
250
00:10:57,534 --> 00:11:01,732
I give to you
the Nixon electromagnet.
251
00:11:03,006 --> 00:11:03,938
[ Whirring Hum ]
252
00:11:04,007 --> 00:11:05,998
[ Loud Clang ]
253
00:11:06,076 --> 00:11:09,239
[ Muffled Yelling And Sobbing ]
Turn it off!.
254
00:11:09,312 --> 00:11:11,837
This is going dreadfully.
255
00:11:11,915 --> 00:11:12,973
Am I wrong?
256
00:11:13,049 --> 00:11:15,609
Please tell me I'm wrong.
257
00:11:15,685 --> 00:11:16,845
Excuse me.
258
00:11:16,920 --> 00:11:18,012
For what?
259
00:11:18,088 --> 00:11:20,522
[ Sniffing ]
260
00:11:24,961 --> 00:11:27,395
[ Liquid Bubbling ]
261
00:11:27,464 --> 00:11:28,761
This is it.
262
00:11:28,832 --> 00:11:31,266
You're almost... up.
263
00:11:31,334 --> 00:11:33,268
Stop reminding me.
264
00:11:33,336 --> 00:11:34,303
Nervous?
265
00:11:34,371 --> 00:11:36,737
No, I just don't want to do this.
266
00:11:36,806 --> 00:11:39,240
Don't you ever get sick
of being a Krelboyne?
267
00:11:39,309 --> 00:11:41,743
Of people thinking
you're some kind of freak?
268
00:11:41,811 --> 00:11:44,075
You are...
269
00:11:44,147 --> 00:11:45,842
what you are.
270
00:11:45,916 --> 00:11:47,144
Accept it.
271
00:11:47,217 --> 00:11:48,377
Not without a fight.
272
00:11:48,451 --> 00:11:51,420
You're harshing... my buzz.
273
00:11:53,290 --> 00:11:54,917
Don't let... anyone...
274
00:11:54,991 --> 00:11:57,824
mess with... my stuff.
275
00:12:00,897 --> 00:12:02,797
You know, in the wrong hands,
276
00:12:02,866 --> 00:12:05,596
these chemicals can make
a pretty powerful stink bomb.
277
00:12:07,604 --> 00:12:09,538
These hands look wrong enough.
278
00:12:11,775 --> 00:12:14,869
And this field trip
to the historic ghost town,
279
00:12:14,945 --> 00:12:17,277
I think we all know
what that leads to--
280
00:12:17,347 --> 00:12:20,714
the occult, devil worship,
state colleges.
281
00:12:20,784 --> 00:12:24,151
So then it's agreed
that the trip will be canceled.
282
00:12:24,221 --> 00:12:26,689
Wait a minute.
You can't decide that.
283
00:12:26,756 --> 00:12:28,155
You didn't even vote.
284
00:12:28,225 --> 00:12:31,319
I was only going
by the general tone of the group.
285
00:12:31,394 --> 00:12:32,383
General tone?
286
00:12:32,462 --> 00:12:33,724
I haven't heard a peep...
287
00:12:33,797 --> 00:12:35,492
out of any of these
other women all day.
288
00:12:35,565 --> 00:12:36,862
What, you all agree...
289
00:12:36,933 --> 00:12:39,231
with what Mrs. Control Freak
here is saying?
290
00:12:39,302 --> 00:12:40,428
Well--
291
00:12:40,503 --> 00:12:41,401
Phyllis!
292
00:12:41,471 --> 00:12:44,167
My name isn't Phyllis!
293
00:12:44,241 --> 00:12:47,438
And, no, I don't feel that way.
294
00:12:47,510 --> 00:12:49,341
[ Woman ]I don't either! I never liked--
295
00:12:49,412 --> 00:12:50,879
My husband told me
to stand up to you...
296
00:12:50,947 --> 00:12:52,915
after I came home
from that bake sale in tears.
297
00:12:52,983 --> 00:12:54,041
[ Women Arguing ]
298
00:12:54,117 --> 00:12:56,551
My soy burger...
299
00:12:56,620 --> 00:12:59,214
it's bleeding!
300
00:12:59,289 --> 00:13:00,779
This is meat!
301
00:13:00,857 --> 00:13:02,119
We're eating meat!
302
00:13:02,192 --> 00:13:03,659
Oh, my God!
303
00:13:05,662 --> 00:13:07,823
We're eating meat!
304
00:13:09,199 --> 00:13:10,461
[ Yelling ]
305
00:13:18,041 --> 00:13:19,235
[ Reese ]
Get out of the way!
306
00:13:19,309 --> 00:13:20,435
Come here!
307
00:13:21,211 --> 00:13:23,076
[ All Arguing ]
308
00:13:34,691 --> 00:13:36,625
[ People Shrieking ]
309
00:13:37,961 --> 00:13:39,952
Okay, the difference
between a stink bomb...
310
00:13:40,030 --> 00:13:41,827
and a level-three toxic biohazard...
311
00:13:41,898 --> 00:13:44,799
is apparently two extra drops
of sulfur tetroxide.
312
00:13:44,868 --> 00:13:46,631
I'm totally suing that web site.
313
00:13:46,703 --> 00:13:48,534
- I didn't do it!
- I didn't do it!
314
00:14:04,721 --> 00:14:07,781
I want... a receipt.
315
00:14:07,857 --> 00:14:09,552
[ Sobbing ]
316
00:14:09,626 --> 00:14:10,854
I'm kind of conflicted.
317
00:14:10,927 --> 00:14:13,293
On the one hand,
I ruined Caroline's picnic...
318
00:14:13,363 --> 00:14:15,831
and very possibly endangered
a hundred lives.
319
00:14:15,899 --> 00:14:18,390
On the other hand,
now I don't have to do my act.
320
00:14:18,468 --> 00:14:20,459
[ Whimpering ]
321
00:14:20,537 --> 00:14:22,505
Did you miss me?
322
00:14:22,572 --> 00:14:24,506
Mm-hmm.
323
00:14:24,574 --> 00:14:27,270
So who was that girl
with her hands all over you?
324
00:14:27,344 --> 00:14:29,073
What girl, the paramedic?
325
00:14:29,145 --> 00:14:32,080
She was making sure
I didn't inhale any toxic fumes.
326
00:14:32,148 --> 00:14:34,776
Oh, I'm sure you loved
every moment of it.
327
00:14:34,851 --> 00:14:36,580
God, would you quit nagging me?
328
00:14:36,653 --> 00:14:38,712
Maybe if you paid a little
more attention to me.
329
00:14:38,788 --> 00:14:39,755
More attention?
330
00:14:39,823 --> 00:14:40,881
You're smothering me.
331
00:14:40,957 --> 00:14:42,117
I need space.
332
00:14:42,192 --> 00:14:43,819
Oh, you'll get your space.
333
00:14:43,893 --> 00:14:45,383
We're through.
334
00:14:45,462 --> 00:14:46,588
Fine by me.
335
00:14:49,232 --> 00:14:51,564
Here's the school ring
you gave me.
336
00:14:52,769 --> 00:14:54,703
The teddy bear key chain.
337
00:14:57,807 --> 00:14:59,468
- Your shirt.
- Your two poems.
338
00:14:59,542 --> 00:15:01,407
The book you lent me.
339
00:15:01,478 --> 00:15:03,673
Your Depeche Mode tape!
340
00:15:03,747 --> 00:15:04,714
And here's your gum.
341
00:15:07,217 --> 00:15:08,445
I love Krelboynes.
342
00:15:08,518 --> 00:15:11,316
And I swear,
I'm not just saying that.
343
00:15:11,388 --> 00:15:13,583
Why would I?
344
00:15:13,656 --> 00:15:15,590
Nice hang time.
345
00:15:15,658 --> 00:15:17,148
Well, it's really a simple function...
346
00:15:17,227 --> 00:15:19,388
of the tensile strength
of the elastic waistband.
347
00:15:19,462 --> 00:15:21,828
[ Sinister Chuckle ]
348
00:15:21,898 --> 00:15:24,458
[ Crying ]
349
00:15:28,638 --> 00:15:30,196
I brought you a hamburger.
350
00:15:30,273 --> 00:15:32,798
This should make us even, right?
351
00:15:32,876 --> 00:15:34,810
[ Sniffling ]
352
00:15:34,878 --> 00:15:36,812
Thank you.
353
00:15:42,619 --> 00:15:44,018
Is this meat?
354
00:15:44,087 --> 00:15:45,520
Uh, it might be.
355
00:15:49,526 --> 00:15:52,256
Look what I've been reduced to.
356
00:15:52,328 --> 00:15:53,625
[ Sobs ]
357
00:15:53,696 --> 00:15:56,529
Okay, well, um...
358
00:15:56,599 --> 00:15:58,829
I'm going to...
359
00:15:58,902 --> 00:16:01,132
Oh, Malcolm, I'm so sorry.
360
00:16:01,204 --> 00:16:02,136
Huh?
361
00:16:02,205 --> 00:16:04,139
I know how much...
362
00:16:04,207 --> 00:16:06,971
you were looking forward
to doing your act,
363
00:16:07,043 --> 00:16:09,375
especially
with your family here.
364
00:16:09,446 --> 00:16:11,243
I failed you.
365
00:16:11,314 --> 00:16:13,248
No, you didn't.
366
00:16:13,316 --> 00:16:15,250
Yes, I did.
367
00:16:15,318 --> 00:16:19,414
After today, they're going
to fire my ass so fast.
368
00:16:19,489 --> 00:16:20,649
[ Crying ]
369
00:16:22,759 --> 00:16:24,317
My parents were right.
370
00:16:24,394 --> 00:16:26,919
I never should have left
the cannery.
371
00:16:26,996 --> 00:16:28,520
[ Sniffling ]
372
00:16:28,598 --> 00:16:30,327
Want another hamburger?
373
00:16:32,535 --> 00:16:33,934
[ Gasping ]
374
00:16:34,003 --> 00:16:36,301
Yes!
375
00:16:38,208 --> 00:16:40,506
I do. I do.
376
00:16:40,577 --> 00:16:43,546
I really, really do. I...
377
00:16:43,613 --> 00:16:46,013
really... do.
378
00:16:46,082 --> 00:16:48,016
[ Sobbing ]
379
00:16:48,084 --> 00:16:49,551
Can you believe it? Meat.
380
00:16:49,619 --> 00:16:52,019
I don't know about you,
but I'm outraged.
381
00:16:52,088 --> 00:16:53,248
I want you to know...
382
00:16:53,323 --> 00:16:56,918
that I am going to see to it that you
never serve on a school committee,
383
00:16:56,993 --> 00:16:59,291
hold an office
or even so much as set foot...
384
00:16:59,362 --> 00:17:01,956
in a P.T.A. meeting
as long as I can help it.
385
00:17:02,031 --> 00:17:03,123
Is that a promise, lady?
386
00:17:03,199 --> 00:17:05,224
'Cause I'd really like
to get that in writing.
387
00:17:05,301 --> 00:17:07,098
I should have expected as much...
388
00:17:07,170 --> 00:17:09,638
from the mother
of a foul-mouthed thug.
389
00:17:09,706 --> 00:17:12,971
What he's even doing in this class,
I don't know.
390
00:17:14,677 --> 00:17:16,304
Oh, I see you made a friend.
391
00:17:16,379 --> 00:17:19,314
Yeah. Tomorrow we're
going shopping for shoes.
392
00:17:19,382 --> 00:17:20,815
Academic circus?
393
00:17:20,884 --> 00:17:22,181
You got the circus part right.
394
00:17:22,252 --> 00:17:24,186
This is the biggest debacle
I've ever seen.
395
00:17:24,254 --> 00:17:26,814
I guarantee you Principal Littledove
will hear about this.
396
00:17:26,890 --> 00:17:29,688
[ Man ]
He sure will, from all of us.
397
00:17:29,759 --> 00:17:31,249
Can I ask you a question?
398
00:17:31,327 --> 00:17:34,262
Yes. All women suck.
399
00:17:34,330 --> 00:17:36,025
No, I mean...
you'd still like me...
400
00:17:36,099 --> 00:17:39,933
even if you found out
I was a freak, right?
401
00:17:40,003 --> 00:17:42,198
The family wouldn't treat me
any different, right?
402
00:17:42,272 --> 00:17:44,399
Dude, we already know you're smart.
403
00:17:44,474 --> 00:17:47,409
Yeah, but-- Never mind.
404
00:17:47,477 --> 00:17:49,468
Just don't say I didn't warn you.
405
00:17:53,249 --> 00:17:54,477
Look, it's Malcolm!
406
00:17:54,551 --> 00:17:56,849
[ Girl ]Hey, hey, Malcolm's going to do it, Dad!
407
00:17:56,920 --> 00:17:58,319
The P.T.A. is on-line, missy.
408
00:17:58,388 --> 00:18:00,618
Are you aware of
the power of the Internet?
409
00:18:00,690 --> 00:18:03,124
[ Everyone Talking Excitedly ]
410
00:18:03,192 --> 00:18:05,126
Hey, everyone look!
411
00:18:05,194 --> 00:18:07,458
Look, Malcolm's doing it.
He's doing it.
412
00:18:07,530 --> 00:18:08,895
Hey, shut the hell up!
413
00:18:08,965 --> 00:18:11,593
[ Talking Stops ]
414
00:18:17,974 --> 00:18:19,407
Um...
415
00:18:19,475 --> 00:18:22,410
could somebody, please,
show me some credit cards?
416
00:18:27,050 --> 00:18:28,347
Okay.
417
00:18:28,418 --> 00:18:29,680
The numbers on them are:
418
00:18:29,752 --> 00:18:33,813
3699-7 41 2-6823...
419
00:18:33,890 --> 00:18:36,825
91 40 and... 342 4...
420
00:18:36,893 --> 00:18:39,293
1 804-1 83 5...
421
00:18:39,362 --> 00:18:40,989
3668.
422
00:18:41,064 --> 00:18:42,691
He's right!
423
00:18:48,471 --> 00:18:49,631
Okay.
424
00:18:51,374 --> 00:18:53,672
If you add the individual digitson each card...
425
00:18:53,743 --> 00:18:55,677
you get 7 4 and 66.
426
00:18:55,745 --> 00:18:58,976
If you multiply those numbers,
you get 4,884.
427
00:18:59,048 --> 00:19:01,073
How do we even know he's right?
428
00:19:01,150 --> 00:19:03,015
Oh, he's right.
429
00:19:04,821 --> 00:19:07,847
4,884 squared...
430
00:19:07,924 --> 00:19:11,087
is 23,853,456.
431
00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:13,822
The square root of 4,884...
432
00:19:13,896 --> 00:19:16,763
is 69 and 885/1 ,000.
433
00:19:16,833 --> 00:19:18,824
The square root of that...
434
00:19:18,901 --> 00:19:21,495
is eight and 3,597 /1 0,000.
435
00:19:23,573 --> 00:19:24,631
Factor it!
436
00:19:24,707 --> 00:19:26,868
The factors are 23 2 and 73.
437
00:19:26,943 --> 00:19:28,274
Multiply it by pi.
438
00:19:28,344 --> 00:19:30,278
26 and 261 /1 ,000.
439
00:19:30,346 --> 00:19:33,110
- Cube it!
- 584 and 21 4/1 ,000.
440
00:19:33,182 --> 00:19:34,149
The arc tangent!
441
00:19:34,217 --> 00:19:35,514
89 and 9/1 0 degrees.
442
00:19:35,585 --> 00:19:36,313
Natural log!
443
00:19:36,386 --> 00:19:38,786
6 and 3,699/1 0,000.
444
00:19:38,855 --> 00:19:40,516
- What's the reciprocal?
- 1 7 /1 0,000.
445
00:19:40,590 --> 00:19:41,284
In base eight!
446
00:19:41,357 --> 00:19:42,654
1 1 ,431 .
447
00:19:42,725 --> 00:19:43,851
The capital of Iceland!
448
00:19:43,926 --> 00:19:45,689
Reykjavik--
but that's not math.
449
00:20:03,379 --> 00:20:05,313
[ Cloth Ripping ]
450
00:20:05,381 --> 00:20:07,008
Why can't you do that?
451
00:20:07,083 --> 00:20:08,311
Cellular mitosis.
452
00:20:08,384 --> 00:20:10,875
What are we paying your tutor for?
453
00:20:17,627 --> 00:20:19,458
Do you have any brothers?
454
00:20:19,529 --> 00:20:21,394
No.
455
00:20:21,464 --> 00:20:22,988
Ow!
456
00:20:25,134 --> 00:20:26,260
Hey.
457
00:20:26,335 --> 00:20:27,632
Hi.
458
00:20:29,305 --> 00:20:32,274
So, um... how you been?
459
00:20:32,341 --> 00:20:34,332
Fine.
460
00:20:35,845 --> 00:20:37,938
You look good.
461
00:20:38,014 --> 00:20:39,311
Yes, it was.
462
00:20:39,382 --> 00:20:40,906
It was a wonderful circus.
463
00:20:40,983 --> 00:20:43,213
So many people were worried--
464
00:20:43,286 --> 00:20:45,618
Was it as bad as I think it was?
465
00:20:45,688 --> 00:20:48,248
Man, you killed.
466
00:20:48,324 --> 00:20:49,951
That's what I was afraid of.
467
00:20:50,026 --> 00:20:52,187
Sorry you didn't get
to do your act.
468
00:20:52,261 --> 00:20:54,821
Shove... the sympathy,
469
00:20:54,897 --> 00:20:57,195
showboat.
470
00:20:57,266 --> 00:20:59,234
He fell on his butt
and everything.
471
00:20:59,302 --> 00:21:00,735
He was just, like, dazed.
472
00:21:11,981 --> 00:21:13,915
Is Malcolm a robot?
473
00:21:15,618 --> 00:21:17,085
No, son, he's just smart.
474
00:21:18,421 --> 00:21:20,480
Very, very,
475
00:21:20,556 --> 00:21:23,286
very, very, very, very smart.
476
00:21:25,595 --> 00:21:26,391
Hey, Malcolm...
477
00:21:28,231 --> 00:21:30,825
how many fingers am I holding up?
478
00:21:30,900 --> 00:21:32,026
[ Everyone Laughing ]
479
00:21:32,101 --> 00:21:34,228
Shut up.
480
00:21:35,304 --> 00:21:37,033
Analyze what I had for lunch.
481
00:21:37,106 --> 00:21:38,038
[ Burps ]
482
00:21:38,107 --> 00:21:39,574
Get off me, you moron.
483
00:21:39,642 --> 00:21:41,041
You know what I don't understand?
484
00:21:41,110 --> 00:21:42,338
You rattle off those numbers...
485
00:21:42,411 --> 00:21:44,174
but you can't remember
to brush your teeth.
486
00:21:44,247 --> 00:21:45,908
[ Hal ]Hey, who's for Burger Barn?
487
00:21:45,982 --> 00:21:48,576
[ Cheering ]
488
00:21:48,651 --> 00:21:49,447
Burger Barn!
489
00:21:49,519 --> 00:21:50,349
Burger Barn! Burger Barn!
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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