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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:02,559 Come back here! 2 00:00:02,669 --> 00:00:04,034 [tires screeching] 3 00:00:05,839 --> 00:00:08,171 We were cleaned out. We've been hit. 4 00:00:08,241 --> 00:00:10,175 Nobody hits a lady. 5 00:00:10,710 --> 00:00:12,177 Anybody got your rent? 6 00:00:12,245 --> 00:00:14,440 Have you ever thought about trying to buy the place? 7 00:00:14,514 --> 00:00:16,072 Why don't you go back to work? 8 00:00:16,449 --> 00:00:17,541 [exclaiming] 9 00:00:21,654 --> 00:00:26,216 lt wasn't my fault. Some jerk put the beer-- ln the aisle. 10 00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:02,620 (Magnum) Somebody once described great art... 11 00:02:02,689 --> 00:02:04,486 as ""an improvement on perfection. "" 12 00:02:05,058 --> 00:02:08,619 I can"t remember if it was Picasso or Higgins. 13 00:02:08,695 --> 00:02:12,028 I feIt the satisfaction of the artist with my improvement... 14 00:02:12,098 --> 00:02:14,692 on the simpIe perfection of the beer can. 15 00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:18,202 This wasn"t just a stack of cheap six-packs. Here we had... 16 00:02:18,271 --> 00:02:21,866 A study in Day-N-Dark Extra Light by T. Magnum... 17 00:02:22,275 --> 00:02:23,537 signed and dated. 18 00:02:23,610 --> 00:02:26,044 (Heather) Magnum, that'll last about 10 minutes. 19 00:02:26,713 --> 00:02:28,738 You've got the beer curving out into the aisle... 20 00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:31,215 where some klutz is bound to knock it over. 21 00:02:31,284 --> 00:02:34,185 Look, Magnum, if you must play at being an employee... 22 00:02:34,254 --> 00:02:35,881 at least try to be convincing. 23 00:02:35,955 --> 00:02:38,890 Okay, fine, so you don't like me being here, fine... 24 00:02:38,958 --> 00:02:40,550 but don't blow my cover. 25 00:02:40,994 --> 00:02:42,586 l'm doing my best to look legit. 26 00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:45,893 Legit Day-N-Dark employees do not waste their time... 27 00:02:45,965 --> 00:02:48,365 trying to make beer cans look like Rodin. 28 00:02:48,434 --> 00:02:51,130 Rodin? You really think it's that good? 29 00:02:51,204 --> 00:02:52,796 [Heather sighing] l really think... 30 00:02:52,872 --> 00:02:55,340 that l am really upset that our corporate brains... 31 00:02:55,408 --> 00:02:58,673 chose to put a beach boy turned private eye into my store. 32 00:02:58,745 --> 00:03:00,804 Now, hold on. l am-- That l cannot change. 33 00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:02,313 But, l can remind you... 34 00:03:02,382 --> 00:03:04,714 that you were not commissioned to do a sculpture... 35 00:03:04,784 --> 00:03:07,582 you were hired to investigate the robberies. 36 00:03:07,654 --> 00:03:09,713 So, investigate. 37 00:03:09,789 --> 00:03:11,017 [beer cans crashing] 38 00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:15,354 [beer flowing] 39 00:03:19,132 --> 00:03:23,762 lt wasn't my fault. Some jerk put the beer-- ln the aisle. 40 00:03:24,337 --> 00:03:25,736 Yes, l know. 41 00:03:27,073 --> 00:03:30,065 Get the mop, Magnum. Your sculpture's leaking. 42 00:03:32,111 --> 00:03:34,511 l want a strawberry cup-a-dream. 43 00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:36,575 Please. 44 00:03:37,483 --> 00:03:38,711 Please. 45 00:03:47,994 --> 00:03:49,256 [whirring] 46 00:03:50,496 --> 00:03:52,396 And some more quarters. 47 00:03:56,803 --> 00:03:58,134 [cash register dings] 48 00:04:04,911 --> 00:04:06,503 Have a nice day. 49 00:04:06,779 --> 00:04:09,612 [car horn honking] No, wait! Come back with my quarters. 50 00:04:11,684 --> 00:04:13,015 [car tires screeching] 51 00:04:14,454 --> 00:04:15,716 Come back here! 52 00:04:15,788 --> 00:04:17,050 [car horn honking] 53 00:04:18,224 --> 00:04:19,885 Jeanie, look what you're doing. 54 00:04:19,959 --> 00:04:21,688 What's he doing? 55 00:04:30,870 --> 00:04:34,499 Are you all right? Anybody hurt? Oh, no, no. We're fine. 56 00:04:34,641 --> 00:04:37,769 [gasping] What have they done to my display? 57 00:04:37,844 --> 00:04:41,473 Oh, it's not their fault. lt's the kid and that guy in the Street Rod. 58 00:04:41,547 --> 00:04:43,947 Are you ladies all right? Should l call an ambulance? 59 00:04:44,017 --> 00:04:47,885 Oh, no. No, we're all right. l'm awfully sorry. l meant to hit the brake. 60 00:04:48,655 --> 00:04:51,453 You're getting all wet. Oh, well.... 61 00:04:51,524 --> 00:04:54,049 Look, if you'll take care of the ladies, l'll go call the police. 62 00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:55,355 Police? 63 00:04:55,428 --> 00:04:58,659 Nobody is going anywhere, until l find out who's responsible for this. 64 00:04:58,731 --> 00:05:02,895 l told you, the guy with the-- We are taking the total responsibility. 65 00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:04,960 Oh, you don't have to do that. lt's not your fault. 66 00:05:05,038 --> 00:05:06,471 Did you get a license number? 67 00:05:06,539 --> 00:05:08,268 No, the guy peeled out of here-- Oh! 68 00:05:08,341 --> 00:05:09,638 Look, Miss Wilcox... 69 00:05:09,709 --> 00:05:13,645 it was a 1969 Camaro Street Rod, electric blue. 70 00:05:13,713 --> 00:05:15,340 Now, how many of those are there on the island? 71 00:05:15,415 --> 00:05:17,542 No, wait. l think the car was green. 72 00:05:17,617 --> 00:05:21,109 Yes, l'm sure of it. Teal would be more precise, Madge. 73 00:05:21,187 --> 00:05:22,586 (Magnum) No, it was blue. 74 00:05:22,655 --> 00:05:24,350 That--that loud glow-in-the-dark paint. 75 00:05:24,424 --> 00:05:27,393 (Jeanie) l think it just looked blue in the sunlight. 76 00:05:27,894 --> 00:05:30,886 Teal has a funny way of-- Name? 77 00:05:31,230 --> 00:05:32,857 What are you doing? 78 00:05:32,932 --> 00:05:35,958 l have to fill out a report for Day-N-Dark. lt's procedure. 79 00:05:36,035 --> 00:05:37,059 Procedure? 80 00:05:37,136 --> 00:05:39,627 Miss Wilcox, we're getting drenched out here. 81 00:05:39,706 --> 00:05:41,571 (Jeanie) LaSalle. What? 82 00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:44,636 LaSalle. Our name. 83 00:05:44,711 --> 00:05:47,874 (Jeanie) Capital L-A-- l know how to spell it. 84 00:05:47,947 --> 00:05:50,609 Miss Wilcox, you take care of the really important stuff. 85 00:05:50,683 --> 00:05:53,550 l'm gonna call the water department and get that thing shut off... 86 00:05:53,619 --> 00:05:56,611 then l'm gonna call the police before the guy in the Camaro-- 87 00:05:56,689 --> 00:06:00,284 Are you sure it was a Camaro? All these cars look so much alike. 88 00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:02,920 l'm sure. Of course, you're sure. 89 00:06:02,995 --> 00:06:06,089 But it doesn't really matter because we're taking total responsibility... 90 00:06:06,165 --> 00:06:09,464 for all of the damages. Good. Name of insurance company? 91 00:06:09,535 --> 00:06:13,995 Do you think you could call us a taxi? l think the engine's flooded. 92 00:06:19,178 --> 00:06:21,305 (Magnum) Look, don't you worry about a thing. 93 00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:24,839 l'm going to personally see to it that we find that guy with the Street Rod. 94 00:06:24,917 --> 00:06:25,941 Oh, no, no. 95 00:06:26,018 --> 00:06:28,418 Now, we've decided that we're not really sure... 96 00:06:28,488 --> 00:06:30,581 about the make of the car... 97 00:06:30,656 --> 00:06:34,558 and, besides, we don't want to get involved with anything awkward. 98 00:06:34,627 --> 00:06:35,787 But it wasn't your fault... 99 00:06:35,862 --> 00:06:38,160 and you don't have to get involved. l'll be discreet. 100 00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:40,529 See, l'm a private investigator. 101 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:42,831 Bless your heart. What? 102 00:06:42,902 --> 00:06:44,836 Don't give up your dreams. 103 00:06:44,904 --> 00:06:48,635 Madge wanted to be a ballerina, l wanted to be a pilot. 104 00:06:48,708 --> 00:06:52,838 You want to be a private investigator, be a private investigator. 105 00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:56,245 No, no, no. Listen, 19 of those Day-N-Dark stores... 106 00:06:56,315 --> 00:06:59,773 have been robbed in the last three months. No M.O., no clues, no nothing. 107 00:06:59,852 --> 00:07:02,514 They just turn around, and the money is gone. 108 00:07:02,588 --> 00:07:04,522 So l'm there to investigate. 109 00:07:04,590 --> 00:07:06,922 That's what investigators do, you understand? 110 00:07:06,993 --> 00:07:08,517 (Jeanie) Of course. 111 00:07:08,661 --> 00:07:11,061 Only don't let it interfere with your job. 112 00:07:14,467 --> 00:07:15,866 ♪♪[piano playing] 113 00:07:17,203 --> 00:07:18,795 (Jeanie) Well.... 114 00:07:21,407 --> 00:07:24,570 This is it. lt's quite a mess. 115 00:07:24,677 --> 00:07:28,306 But, then, old troupers are used to roughing it. 116 00:07:28,381 --> 00:07:29,370 (Magnum) Troupers? 117 00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:33,283 Nearly all of us here were in the business. Entertainers. 118 00:07:33,352 --> 00:07:37,880 Jeanie and l were actresses for a while. Can't you come in 119 00:07:37,957 --> 00:07:40,585 Oh, no, l've got to get back. Oh, just for five minutes? 120 00:07:40,660 --> 00:07:41,786 For milk and cookies? 121 00:07:41,861 --> 00:07:45,058 We'd love to give you something for bringing us home. 122 00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:46,758 Well, five minutes. 123 00:07:46,833 --> 00:07:47,959 [chuckling] 124 00:07:57,610 --> 00:08:01,774 Hello, everybody. Jeanie, did you get him? 125 00:08:01,914 --> 00:08:03,006 Yes. 126 00:08:03,449 --> 00:08:07,044 Johnny, at least you could comment on our news. 127 00:08:07,119 --> 00:08:10,611 We wrecked the car. Okay. Okay. 128 00:08:10,690 --> 00:08:12,055 [man chattering on TV] 129 00:08:12,124 --> 00:08:14,820 Oh, Herman, here's your music. 130 00:08:18,097 --> 00:08:19,359 ♪♪[playing piano] 131 00:08:22,435 --> 00:08:25,962 [exclaiming] l got Larry Parrish. That's the whole team. 132 00:08:26,038 --> 00:08:27,198 [chuckling] 133 00:08:27,273 --> 00:08:29,867 Texas Ranger fan? (Johnnie) Parrish. 134 00:08:29,942 --> 00:08:32,172 l've been trying to get this card for months. 135 00:08:32,245 --> 00:08:35,476 lt's too bad we didn't meet sooner. l've got two Parrishes. 136 00:08:35,548 --> 00:08:37,175 You got any Tigers up for trade? 137 00:08:37,250 --> 00:08:39,844 Are you kidding? Who collects Detroit? 138 00:08:39,919 --> 00:08:43,355 Wait a minute. l collect Detroit. Then you got a problem. 139 00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:50,026 All right. l'll save you my Detroit stuff. Thanks. 140 00:08:50,563 --> 00:08:53,464 How can they get the nerve to call this ''The Game of the Week''? 141 00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,660 Seattle versus Minnesota. 142 00:08:55,735 --> 00:08:58,329 Dull, but never mind. 143 00:08:58,404 --> 00:09:00,702 My kid's sending me the money to get cable. 144 00:09:00,773 --> 00:09:03,765 Oh, Johnny, it came. 145 00:09:04,844 --> 00:09:07,836 The money from your son. Really? 146 00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:10,909 l don't suppose he sent you your rent? 147 00:09:16,622 --> 00:09:18,487 Anybody got your rent? 148 00:09:18,891 --> 00:09:20,256 Rent money? 149 00:09:21,594 --> 00:09:24,085 Just one of you. lt'll make my day. 150 00:09:29,302 --> 00:09:32,169 Oh, no. Mr. Cole, please. 151 00:09:34,206 --> 00:09:36,003 This is right on half a month, Johnny. 152 00:09:36,075 --> 00:09:37,633 You're still a month and a half behind... 153 00:09:37,710 --> 00:09:39,541 and he's the closest to being paid up. 154 00:09:39,612 --> 00:09:42,206 l guess you're the landlord? (Harvey) No, l'm not the landlord. 155 00:09:42,281 --> 00:09:44,545 l'm Harvey Cole, the agent for the owners. 156 00:09:44,617 --> 00:09:47,279 Who are trying to sell this place right out from under us. 157 00:09:47,353 --> 00:09:50,254 They're not even gonna carry you that long. The owners have decided... 158 00:09:50,323 --> 00:09:52,382 that they would rather have the place empty... 159 00:09:52,458 --> 00:09:55,359 than to pay the electric bill for a bunch of deadbeats. 160 00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:59,558 You all have till after the Labor Day weekend to get paid up... 161 00:09:59,632 --> 00:10:02,931 or hit the street. Mr. Cole, no. 162 00:10:03,002 --> 00:10:05,937 That's only three days. Three and a half... 163 00:10:06,372 --> 00:10:09,500 and between you all, you owe $1,800. 164 00:10:09,709 --> 00:10:10,903 $1,750. 165 00:10:10,977 --> 00:10:13,707 Come on, Harvey, that's his cable money. 166 00:10:13,779 --> 00:10:15,406 They don't hook up cable to a park bench... 167 00:10:15,481 --> 00:10:17,176 which is where he's gonna be on Tuesday. 168 00:10:17,249 --> 00:10:20,844 l'll save you the trouble of telling the rest of the sponges. 169 00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:23,547 [gasping] 170 00:10:24,757 --> 00:10:25,985 [ladies laughing] 171 00:10:29,228 --> 00:10:30,627 What a dump! 172 00:10:31,163 --> 00:10:32,994 No wonder, they can't sell it. 173 00:10:33,065 --> 00:10:34,794 ♪♪[Herman playing an ominous tune] 174 00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:39,601 (Harvey) l hear that. 175 00:10:43,909 --> 00:10:45,171 Jeanie... 176 00:10:46,879 --> 00:10:49,040 do any of you have the back rent money? 177 00:10:49,115 --> 00:10:53,051 Tommy, you're being indelicate. No. l'm being realistic. 178 00:10:53,119 --> 00:10:54,984 How do you expect to pay, for the damages you did... 179 00:10:55,054 --> 00:10:56,919 when you're having trouble meeting the rent? 180 00:10:56,989 --> 00:11:00,186 Tommy, we have auto insurance. 181 00:11:00,259 --> 00:11:02,819 We do not have rent insurance. 182 00:11:02,895 --> 00:11:04,419 Now, really, this is none of your affair... 183 00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:06,124 so why don't you go back to the store... 184 00:11:06,198 --> 00:11:08,792 before somebody misses you. Now, come on. 185 00:11:08,868 --> 00:11:10,529 Go on, Tommy, go. 186 00:11:12,371 --> 00:11:15,340 (Magnum) I feIt as if I"d just been to my famiIy reunion. 187 00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:18,306 I knew everybody in that hoteI room by a different name. 188 00:11:18,377 --> 00:11:20,811 Even Harvey, reminded me of my UncIe Richie... 189 00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:24,179 kind of the bIack sheep of our famiIy who made his Iiving pIaying cards. 190 00:11:24,250 --> 00:11:27,845 Anyway, even though Madge and Jeanie had an unerring knack... 191 00:11:27,920 --> 00:11:30,855 for making me feeI Iike a 10-year-oId, I wanted to heIp them out. 192 00:11:30,923 --> 00:11:33,357 I mean, everybody shouId do their bit in a famiIy crisis. 193 00:11:33,426 --> 00:11:36,589 So, I spent the rest of the day driving by garages... 194 00:11:36,662 --> 00:11:38,630 that serviced high-performance Street Rods. 195 00:11:41,434 --> 00:11:43,527 I know what you"re thinking, and you"re right. 196 00:11:43,602 --> 00:11:46,696 My chances of running across that car were next to impossibIe... 197 00:11:46,772 --> 00:11:49,104 but my UncIe Richie aIways toId me... 198 00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:51,643 ""Expect to get Iucky and you wiII. "" 199 00:12:00,086 --> 00:12:01,485 Hey, man... 200 00:12:02,521 --> 00:12:04,113 don't mess with my car. 201 00:12:04,190 --> 00:12:07,216 Your car? Were you at the Day-N-Dark on Kuhio? 202 00:12:27,913 --> 00:12:29,175 [car engine starting] 203 00:12:29,615 --> 00:12:30,980 [car tires screeching] 204 00:12:38,257 --> 00:12:39,519 ♪♪[piano playing] 205 00:12:45,397 --> 00:12:49,493 (Jeanie) Tommy, it's quite theatrical, but not very logical. 206 00:12:49,568 --> 00:12:51,729 Jeanie.... l don't think the man in the teal car... 207 00:12:51,804 --> 00:12:55,001 meant to harm you in any way. Jeanie, please... 208 00:12:56,342 --> 00:12:58,867 would you mind not calling me Tommy? 209 00:12:59,512 --> 00:13:02,538 Tommy is a little boy with an all-day sucker. 210 00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:07,109 Tommy, please. Please, dear, come and sit down. 211 00:13:07,186 --> 00:13:08,778 [man chattering on TV] 212 00:13:12,525 --> 00:13:15,722 Your career goals are important to you. 213 00:13:15,795 --> 00:13:17,695 You know, your detective thing. 214 00:13:17,763 --> 00:13:19,458 So, it's quite understandable... 215 00:13:19,532 --> 00:13:22,194 that you wish to turn a harmless prank... 216 00:13:22,334 --> 00:13:25,531 into a television drama. lt wasn't a prank. 217 00:13:25,604 --> 00:13:27,299 (Magnum) The guy who caused your accident just-- 218 00:13:27,373 --> 00:13:30,638 Gave you a bad paint job. Yes, you've said that. 219 00:13:30,709 --> 00:13:34,145 So, did you ask the owner of the garage... 220 00:13:34,213 --> 00:13:37,205 if he knew the man in the teal car? Blue. lt was blue... 221 00:13:37,283 --> 00:13:38,944 and there was no one else there. 222 00:13:39,018 --> 00:13:41,043 Then you should have waited for someone to come back. 223 00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:45,284 Why come here? Because l thought you might be interested. 224 00:13:45,357 --> 00:13:49,225 Fine, fine, never mind. lt doesn't matter. 225 00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:52,293 Because l have the license number... 226 00:13:52,364 --> 00:13:54,229 of the Street Rod and l'll just.... 227 00:13:55,601 --> 00:13:57,125 Wait a minute. 228 00:13:57,236 --> 00:14:00,637 [chuckling] lt was ''M.'' M-E... 229 00:14:01,607 --> 00:14:02,869 M-E-A.... 230 00:14:03,142 --> 00:14:04,973 ♪♪[piano continues playing] 231 00:14:06,579 --> 00:14:07,807 Herman! 232 00:14:11,917 --> 00:14:15,944 The carpenter will be here at 10:00 on Monday to fix the stair railing. 233 00:14:16,088 --> 00:14:20,149 Don't want anyone to hurt yourself when you're moving your stuff out. 234 00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:22,956 l'm deadly serious, people. Tuesday. 235 00:14:24,997 --> 00:14:28,296 This receipt for the $50 l got yesterday, Wells. 236 00:14:28,367 --> 00:14:31,734 l was wrong. You're still two months behind. 237 00:14:36,041 --> 00:14:37,167 [snorts] 238 00:14:39,178 --> 00:14:42,773 Wells? No wonder, he's a Texas Ranger fan. 239 00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:49,214 Johnnie, you know, the Rangers are okay, but... 240 00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:51,920 l lived in Virginia... 241 00:14:52,091 --> 00:14:55,254 and l don't think l ever got over the Senators leaving Washington. 242 00:14:55,327 --> 00:14:56,589 Oh, come on. 243 00:14:56,662 --> 00:14:59,563 The wisest thing they ever did was moving the franchise to Texas. 244 00:14:59,632 --> 00:15:01,862 The Senators were never great. No. 245 00:15:01,934 --> 00:15:05,426 No, but they had some pretty good ball players over the years. 246 00:15:05,504 --> 00:15:10,407 Walter Johnson, Frank Howard, Mickey Vernon and a second baseman... 247 00:15:10,476 --> 00:15:11,966 named Johnnie Wells. 248 00:15:13,946 --> 00:15:15,470 l saw you play. 249 00:15:16,482 --> 00:15:19,110 lt was June 10, 1952. 250 00:15:19,184 --> 00:15:21,084 lt was the second major league game l ever saw. 251 00:15:21,153 --> 00:15:23,178 Did l have a good day? ''O'' for four. 252 00:15:23,255 --> 00:15:26,053 But you got on twice. lt was an error and a walk... 253 00:15:26,125 --> 00:15:28,184 and you--you pulled off a couple of miraculous steals. 254 00:15:28,260 --> 00:15:31,093 That was the year you led the league with 46. You hit 381 . 255 00:15:31,163 --> 00:15:34,758 No, no, no. 281 . l never hit over 300. 256 00:15:34,833 --> 00:15:37,301 Johnnie, l got your card. lt's on the back. 257 00:15:37,369 --> 00:15:39,303 You got that card? Yeah. 258 00:15:39,371 --> 00:15:43,831 That's the one. The misprint. lt says 381 instead of 2. 259 00:15:43,909 --> 00:15:47,606 Oh, man, are you lucky. That little jewel's worth over $50. 260 00:15:47,913 --> 00:15:49,778 l sold mine last year. 261 00:15:49,915 --> 00:15:51,815 [maIe commentator chattering on TV] 262 00:15:51,984 --> 00:15:54,179 You sold your own card? Yeah. 263 00:15:55,020 --> 00:15:59,582 For $50 worth of spending money, huh, l should be sentimental? 264 00:16:00,059 --> 00:16:03,153 [crowd cheering on TV] Diabetes. Every little bit helps. 265 00:16:05,831 --> 00:16:07,958 Whee! Another home run. 266 00:16:10,135 --> 00:16:11,363 Girls... 267 00:16:12,738 --> 00:16:14,467 how long has this place been on the market? 268 00:16:14,540 --> 00:16:15,734 Almost a year. 269 00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:20,074 Which means it's not exactly the hottest listing in town, am l right? 270 00:16:20,145 --> 00:16:21,271 So... 271 00:16:22,114 --> 00:16:25,447 have you ever thought about trying to buy the place? 272 00:16:25,551 --> 00:16:29,351 Tommy, what a nice suggestion. Why don't you go back to work? 273 00:16:29,421 --> 00:16:30,615 No, no, just listen to me. 274 00:16:30,689 --> 00:16:35,558 You have to come up with $1,800 by Tuesday, regardless, right? 275 00:16:35,627 --> 00:16:38,095 So, instead of using the money for the rent... 276 00:16:38,230 --> 00:16:40,755 you just walk in, make a viable bid... 277 00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:43,063 with earnest money, and the owners are bound to jump at it. 278 00:16:43,135 --> 00:16:47,469 With business logic like that, you'll never be President of Day-N-Dark. 279 00:16:47,973 --> 00:16:49,338 lt could work. 280 00:16:49,508 --> 00:16:52,341 We're all on rigid fixed incomes here. 281 00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:55,640 And we're not fund raisers. 282 00:16:56,048 --> 00:16:58,141 Would you like to meet a guy who is? 283 00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:02,844 (Higgins) LaSalle, that name seems so familiar to me. 284 00:17:02,921 --> 00:17:07,358 Of course we do carry the name of a famous French explorer... 285 00:17:07,426 --> 00:17:09,792 and of a very fine car. 286 00:17:10,295 --> 00:17:12,729 Both dead for some years now. 287 00:17:13,232 --> 00:17:16,429 Yes, of course. Well.... 288 00:17:16,769 --> 00:17:19,602 But, we've never met? 289 00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:23,672 Oh, l'm sorry, no. l feel confident we would remember. 290 00:17:23,842 --> 00:17:25,139 Yes, of course. 291 00:17:25,210 --> 00:17:29,613 Ladies, let me just say that l am most sympathetic to your plight. 292 00:17:29,681 --> 00:17:32,206 However, Magnum's suggestion that we hold a Bingo Bazaar... 293 00:17:32,284 --> 00:17:36,584 on the Robin Masters' estate is out of the question, l'm afraid. 294 00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:38,952 Of course, Mr. Higgins. 295 00:17:39,024 --> 00:17:43,051 We tried to talk him out of it, but Tommy does get so excited. 296 00:17:43,128 --> 00:17:45,255 Yes, l'm well aware of that. 297 00:17:46,532 --> 00:17:49,057 Now if we could stage an event with a proper decorum... 298 00:17:49,134 --> 00:17:51,125 perhaps a bridge tournament at the Yacht Club-- 299 00:17:51,203 --> 00:17:53,501 One! One. 300 00:17:54,273 --> 00:17:57,071 M-E-A 1 . Two more to go. 301 00:17:57,142 --> 00:18:01,010 Oh, dear, are we back to the man in the hot Rod again? 302 00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:04,379 Tommy, wouldn't you like to go outside and play? 303 00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:07,808 [exclaiming] 304 00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:11,651 What a beautiful volume. Poetry? 305 00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:15,325 No, it's nothing really. Just a little diary l keep. 306 00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:17,725 Wonderful penmanship. 307 00:18:19,031 --> 00:18:22,831 The Crisis in the Suez by Jonathan Quayle Higgins. 308 00:18:23,068 --> 00:18:25,195 Just a little diary? Well.... 309 00:18:25,270 --> 00:18:29,969 Yes, l do like to jot down my past remembrances from time to time. 310 00:18:30,042 --> 00:18:33,569 My husband was in the Suez during the trouble there. 311 00:18:33,745 --> 00:18:36,543 Good heavens, what was his name? (Madge) 312 00:18:37,082 --> 00:18:38,447 My God. 313 00:18:38,584 --> 00:18:40,245 He had that effect on many people. 314 00:18:40,319 --> 00:18:41,445 [Higgins chuckling] 315 00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:43,886 l only knew your husband by reputation. 316 00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:46,686 But Gordon Archer was legendary in his own time. 317 00:18:46,859 --> 00:18:48,827 (Madge) l was very proud of him. 318 00:18:49,094 --> 00:18:52,894 And we had such wonderful times together. 319 00:18:53,198 --> 00:18:56,565 l remember one particularly exciting experience... 320 00:18:56,635 --> 00:19:00,799 crossing the Zambezi, just north of the Mozambique Channel. 321 00:19:00,873 --> 00:19:03,808 Archer was risking everything to take me to safety. 322 00:19:03,876 --> 00:19:04,900 Madge.... 323 00:19:04,977 --> 00:19:07,468 Magnum, how incredibly rude, even for you. 324 00:19:08,547 --> 00:19:10,572 l'm sorry, Madge, but it's Saturday. 325 00:19:10,649 --> 00:19:12,879 We have to raise the money by Tuesday. 326 00:19:12,951 --> 00:19:15,511 Madge tells stories like you tell stories, Higgins. 327 00:19:15,587 --> 00:19:16,747 One story apiece... 328 00:19:16,822 --> 00:19:18,483 and we're non-stop into Wednesday afternoon. 329 00:19:18,557 --> 00:19:21,321 lt is impossible to arrange a bridge tournament by Tuesday. 330 00:19:21,393 --> 00:19:23,861 So, invite the same philanthropic people... 331 00:19:23,929 --> 00:19:27,387 who play ''tax deductible'' bridge over to play ''tax deductible'' bingo. 332 00:19:27,466 --> 00:19:30,162 The only difference will be instead of trumping or bidding... 333 00:19:30,235 --> 00:19:33,432 you put cute little kernels of corn on a piece of paper. 334 00:19:33,539 --> 00:19:34,767 Please? 335 00:19:36,608 --> 00:19:40,271 Even though l never met Gordon Archer, we stood inches apart one evening... 336 00:19:40,345 --> 00:19:42,279 as we fought for our very lives. 337 00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:44,872 Higgins! Tuesday. 338 00:19:44,950 --> 00:19:48,784 Magnum, we will have the bingo gala, Monday afternoon at 1 :00. 339 00:19:49,488 --> 00:19:52,218 Now, please go and find something to do. 340 00:19:54,993 --> 00:19:56,392 [computer keys clacking] 341 00:20:12,377 --> 00:20:15,471 Thank you. Keep that Day-N-Dark smile. 342 00:20:22,955 --> 00:20:24,752 (T.C.) Pickled egg, please? 343 00:20:26,592 --> 00:20:28,355 T.C., no. 344 00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:31,086 Come on, can't you come up with another joke? 345 00:20:31,163 --> 00:20:33,063 l mean, three days in a row. 346 00:20:33,131 --> 00:20:35,656 Besides, you know l hate to fish those stinky things out. 347 00:20:35,734 --> 00:20:38,168 l hate them. Pickled egg, please. 348 00:20:57,222 --> 00:21:00,521 What the hell are you doing? We have a store full of customers. 349 00:21:00,592 --> 00:21:04,084 Why aren't you watching them? Because l'm watching this, 350 00:21:04,162 --> 00:21:05,789 Please, not now. 351 00:21:10,936 --> 00:21:12,096 [sighing] There. 352 00:21:14,973 --> 00:21:16,338 $.59. 353 00:21:17,476 --> 00:21:20,411 How stupid of me. l must've forgotten my wallet. 354 00:21:26,351 --> 00:21:27,443 T.C.! 355 00:21:29,488 --> 00:21:30,546 [sighing] 356 00:21:30,622 --> 00:21:32,180 Come back here. 357 00:21:32,691 --> 00:21:33,885 Magnum. 358 00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:36,120 [sighing] 359 00:21:37,929 --> 00:21:39,556 Fifty-nine cents. 360 00:21:40,399 --> 00:21:43,027 Come on, guys, cut the fifth grade comedy routine. 361 00:21:43,101 --> 00:21:45,592 Day-N-Dark was hit for the 20th time this morning. 362 00:21:45,671 --> 00:21:47,605 Here? No, not here. l was here. 363 00:21:47,673 --> 00:21:51,109 lt was store number 27 on the Lia. The same as usual. 364 00:21:51,176 --> 00:21:53,542 The cash register was emptied out without a clue... 365 00:21:53,612 --> 00:21:54,840 the customers were clean. 366 00:21:54,913 --> 00:21:58,747 Well, l guess, you got to get to the other stores more often, T.M. 367 00:21:59,151 --> 00:22:01,949 That's it. Great cover. 368 00:22:02,387 --> 00:22:04,355 You can drop into any Day-N-Night... 369 00:22:04,423 --> 00:22:06,516 as the official pickled egg pronger. 370 00:22:07,759 --> 00:22:11,559 That's cute, T.C. Real cute. Rick, what about lce Pick? 371 00:22:11,630 --> 00:22:13,996 What about him? Well, Ronnie's speed shop? 372 00:22:14,066 --> 00:22:16,660 You promised me he'd lean on the owner, for info on his employees. 373 00:22:16,735 --> 00:22:18,965 Thomas, lce Pick wants a fee. 374 00:22:19,171 --> 00:22:21,139 How much? Well, it's really nothing. 375 00:22:21,206 --> 00:22:23,674 He just wants an invite to your bingo game. What? 376 00:22:23,742 --> 00:22:26,404 Oh, come on, Thomas, it means a lot to lce Pick. 377 00:22:26,478 --> 00:22:28,412 He used to be a bingo caller in the old days... 378 00:22:28,480 --> 00:22:30,641 and he wants to be seen at a function like this. 379 00:22:30,716 --> 00:22:33,947 No, not lce Pick. Rick, this is strictly a class event. 380 00:22:34,019 --> 00:22:37,182 You know, the Higgins Hot 100. Okay, just forget it. 381 00:22:37,255 --> 00:22:39,815 No lce Pick invite, no info. 382 00:22:42,327 --> 00:22:43,919 Follow that car. 383 00:22:43,995 --> 00:22:45,257 [tires screeching] 384 00:22:45,764 --> 00:22:46,924 Right! 385 00:22:47,032 --> 00:22:48,260 [tires screeching] 386 00:22:49,167 --> 00:22:53,365 And Rick.... Hey, Rick! Rick, l wanna go with you! 387 00:22:53,705 --> 00:22:56,401 You don't know why l want you to follow him! 388 00:22:56,475 --> 00:22:57,601 Rick! 389 00:22:57,776 --> 00:22:58,765 [grunts] 390 00:23:10,655 --> 00:23:13,146 l want four quarters... 391 00:23:13,258 --> 00:23:15,852 and the price of a tank full of Strawberry Dream. 392 00:23:15,927 --> 00:23:19,658 l wasn't stealing from the jar. l was just making change. 393 00:23:19,731 --> 00:23:22,165 Oh, yeah? How do you make change for four cents? 394 00:23:22,234 --> 00:23:23,565 Magnum? What? 395 00:23:23,635 --> 00:23:24,932 l've got the little thief. 396 00:23:25,003 --> 00:23:25,992 [groaning] 397 00:23:27,406 --> 00:23:28,737 (Magnum) No, you don't. 398 00:23:28,807 --> 00:23:29,933 [grunting] 399 00:23:30,375 --> 00:23:31,569 Pay up. 400 00:23:32,644 --> 00:23:33,804 [groaning] 401 00:23:34,746 --> 00:23:36,771 Please, mister. Don't hit me anymore. 402 00:23:36,848 --> 00:23:39,043 l'll do anything you say, but just don't hit me. 403 00:23:39,117 --> 00:23:40,641 Hey, you hit the kid? 404 00:23:40,719 --> 00:23:42,448 No, of course not. 405 00:23:42,621 --> 00:23:45,556 Yes, he did, sir, but it wasn't his fault. 406 00:23:45,624 --> 00:23:50,357 l was stealing for my pregnant sister. She's got nothing to eat. 407 00:23:50,429 --> 00:23:53,262 Oh, come on. Did you hit the kid? 408 00:23:53,331 --> 00:23:54,821 No, he hit me. 409 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:56,194 Magnum! (Magnum) What? 410 00:23:56,268 --> 00:23:58,259 This is the sister? No. 411 00:23:58,336 --> 00:24:00,133 Miss Wilcox, will you please explain to him... 412 00:24:00,205 --> 00:24:01,729 that l did not hit this brat. What? 413 00:24:01,807 --> 00:24:03,604 (Heather) We've been robbed. Where'd he go? What? 414 00:24:03,675 --> 00:24:06,143 Hey, Skeeter, got a real pervert here. 415 00:24:06,211 --> 00:24:07,610 He hits kids. 416 00:24:07,679 --> 00:24:11,672 With you standing right here solving the cookie jar crime, we were cleaned out. 417 00:24:11,750 --> 00:24:14,583 The cash register's empty. We've been hit. 418 00:24:15,020 --> 00:24:19,457 You hit the kid and the lady? Of course not. Nobody hit anybody. 419 00:24:19,524 --> 00:24:21,424 (Heather) Yes, we were. Just now. 420 00:24:23,829 --> 00:24:28,528 Nobody hits a lady. He bothers you again, you come and see me. 421 00:24:30,535 --> 00:24:32,969 Well, l hope you're satisfied. 422 00:24:33,038 --> 00:24:36,496 You've made a mess of everything. Me? 423 00:24:36,575 --> 00:24:39,203 Wait a minute, will you? Just hold all the customers... 424 00:24:39,277 --> 00:24:40,676 l'll question them. 425 00:24:40,745 --> 00:24:43,270 Surprise. There's nobody in there. 426 00:24:58,563 --> 00:25:00,394 (Magnum) FaiIure"s a funny thing. 427 00:25:00,465 --> 00:25:02,626 A baby Iearns to waIk by faIIing down. 428 00:25:02,834 --> 00:25:05,302 A chiId Iearns to swim by aImost drowning. 429 00:25:05,504 --> 00:25:08,871 And what kid hits the baII the first time he swings a bat? 430 00:25:09,040 --> 00:25:10,200 Aha! 431 00:25:10,876 --> 00:25:13,470 So, why is it that the oIder we get... 432 00:25:13,545 --> 00:25:16,378 the harder it is to deaI with the Iessons of faiIure? 433 00:25:16,448 --> 00:25:20,646 Right after the robbery, the Day-N-Dark head office advised me... 434 00:25:20,719 --> 00:25:22,380 that I was fired. 435 00:25:23,855 --> 00:25:26,847 But I stiII had some peopIe who were counting on me... 436 00:25:26,925 --> 00:25:29,860 incIuding a great base steaIer in a squeeze. 437 00:25:31,563 --> 00:25:34,623 It made the momentary faiIure easier to handIe. 438 00:25:38,003 --> 00:25:39,163 [door opening] 439 00:25:39,671 --> 00:25:43,038 Magnum, there you are. We've run into a bit of a snag, l'm afraid. 440 00:25:43,108 --> 00:25:45,872 Higgins, this is much more important than your Bingo Bazaar. 441 00:25:45,944 --> 00:25:47,536 There's a problem with the bingo party? 442 00:25:47,612 --> 00:25:49,876 Nothing that can't be resolved. Thomas.... 443 00:25:49,948 --> 00:25:52,382 Just a second. You are still planning on having it? 444 00:25:52,450 --> 00:25:55,248 Of course, but Agatha's having difficulty finding the corn kernels... 445 00:25:55,320 --> 00:25:56,651 for the bingo tokens. 446 00:25:56,721 --> 00:25:59,656 l risk life and limb to get this license plate number for you... 447 00:25:59,724 --> 00:26:02,056 and you wanna talk corn? You got the number? 448 00:26:02,127 --> 00:26:04,061 l lost him halfway to Pearl, but l got it. 449 00:26:04,129 --> 00:26:06,689 Agatha came up with what l consider a charming suggestion. 450 00:26:06,765 --> 00:26:08,858 Simple little pearl buttons. That's wrong. 451 00:26:08,934 --> 00:26:10,458 l think ''wrong'' is a bit of an overstatement. 452 00:26:10,535 --> 00:26:12,765 l know you were very specific in requesting corn. Maize. 453 00:26:12,837 --> 00:26:15,863 But l think the buttons would do quite nicely. No, no. 454 00:26:15,941 --> 00:26:18,501 You chased the wrong car. Oh, sure. lt's my fault. 455 00:26:18,577 --> 00:26:20,943 Maybe the guy changed plates, or maybe he's got a matching set... 456 00:26:21,012 --> 00:26:22,240 of '69 Street Rods. 457 00:26:22,314 --> 00:26:25,647 All l know is, this is the number of the car you told me to follow. 458 00:26:25,717 --> 00:26:27,412 lmitation pearl, of course. They're relatively-- 459 00:26:27,485 --> 00:26:29,419 All right, you're right. Splendid. 460 00:26:29,487 --> 00:26:31,785 There's gotta be an explanation. l don't think 461 00:26:31,856 --> 00:26:34,984 l'll call Agatha right away. Oh, yeah, Higgins. You take care of that. 462 00:26:35,060 --> 00:26:38,188 Listen, can you get me the registration? How am l supposed to do that? 463 00:26:38,263 --> 00:26:39,321 lce Pick. 464 00:26:39,397 --> 00:26:42,025 l'm afraid he didn't get an invitation to the Bingo game. 465 00:26:42,100 --> 00:26:43,465 Higgins. Higgins. 466 00:26:45,103 --> 00:26:48,334 You really do have to invite a fellow named lce Pick to the party. 467 00:26:48,406 --> 00:26:50,738 l'm terribly sorry, but the guest list is complete... 468 00:26:50,809 --> 00:26:52,902 and l'm not familiar with the name lce Pick. 469 00:26:52,978 --> 00:26:56,004 A pseudonym for a shy patron? Yeah, something like that. 470 00:26:56,081 --> 00:26:58,572 He's from an old, established Chicago family... 471 00:26:58,650 --> 00:27:01,084 and he's willing to make a sizeable donation. 472 00:27:01,152 --> 00:27:03,416 Really? Which family? 473 00:27:03,488 --> 00:27:06,787 Their name is very respected. They're big in cement. 474 00:27:08,927 --> 00:27:11,862 Just have him here at 1 :00 in formal attire. 475 00:27:11,930 --> 00:27:15,024 Now, if you will both excuse me... 476 00:27:15,100 --> 00:27:18,331 l have something really important to take care of. 477 00:27:26,544 --> 00:27:29,513 What sort of a man chooses the name lce Pick? 478 00:27:31,816 --> 00:27:33,078 [people chattering] 479 00:27:35,820 --> 00:27:38,880 lsn't it terrific? lt arrived late last night. 480 00:27:39,157 --> 00:27:41,091 Has to be from my kid. 481 00:27:41,159 --> 00:27:44,492 Did l tell you he still lives in Washington? Yeah? 482 00:27:46,131 --> 00:27:48,292 Hey, Johnnie... 483 00:27:48,366 --> 00:27:52,894 l've got a little gift for you, too, l mean, it can't compare with the TV, but.... 484 00:27:54,139 --> 00:27:56,130 [man chattering on TV] 485 00:27:56,775 --> 00:27:58,538 My '52 card. Yeah. 486 00:27:58,610 --> 00:28:00,339 The misprint. 487 00:28:00,412 --> 00:28:04,542 No, go on, take it back. Don't go around giving away $50. 488 00:28:04,616 --> 00:28:07,779 No, l'm getting a million out of giving it to you. 489 00:28:07,852 --> 00:28:09,820 Just don't sell it. (Johnnie) Sorry. 490 00:28:09,888 --> 00:28:12,584 This card is worth two months of cable. 491 00:28:13,558 --> 00:28:16,083 Johnnie, l've kept that card for over 30 years. 492 00:28:16,161 --> 00:28:19,392 Yeah, l know, and you go on keeping it. 493 00:28:20,432 --> 00:28:24,266 For you, this is a prize possession. That means a lot to me. 494 00:28:25,036 --> 00:28:28,267 But all it is to Johnnie Wells is $50. 495 00:28:33,945 --> 00:28:35,640 [commentator chattering on TV] 496 00:28:39,884 --> 00:28:43,047 Why, my dear, not working this afternoon? 497 00:28:43,121 --> 00:28:44,645 l was fired. 498 00:28:44,723 --> 00:28:47,920 Well, l'm sorry to say it, l'm not surprised. 499 00:28:48,626 --> 00:28:51,720 You must end your involvement with our problems. 500 00:28:51,796 --> 00:28:53,423 We're doing just fine. 501 00:28:53,498 --> 00:28:57,127 Now, call Miss Wilcox and tell her that you're sorry... 502 00:28:57,202 --> 00:28:59,830 and that you really want to do better. 503 00:28:59,971 --> 00:29:01,768 ♪♪[playing an ominous tune] 504 00:29:03,708 --> 00:29:06,541 Have your kicks, Herman, it doesn't get to me. 505 00:29:07,645 --> 00:29:11,479 Will you look at that? Do you believe it? 506 00:29:11,583 --> 00:29:13,778 Okay, Johnnie, it goes. (Johnnie) No. 507 00:29:13,852 --> 00:29:17,481 Come on. Harvey, that TV is not going anywhere. 508 00:29:17,555 --> 00:29:20,023 His son gave it to him. So? 509 00:29:20,091 --> 00:29:23,788 l got my orders, and these guys with me got a big truck. 510 00:29:23,862 --> 00:29:26,660 We're here to get the piano that Herman's nephew bought... 511 00:29:26,731 --> 00:29:28,892 the recliner that David's ex-agent bought... 512 00:29:28,967 --> 00:29:33,131 and the brand new $500 TV set that Johnnie's son bought. 513 00:29:34,572 --> 00:29:37,939 The owners said, ''confiscate.'' The owners can't confiscate. 514 00:29:38,009 --> 00:29:40,637 lt's illegal. This'll say it's legal. 515 00:29:41,780 --> 00:29:45,079 Thought they had until Tuesday? Read it and weep. 516 00:29:45,283 --> 00:29:47,877 How do l know this is real? Call your lawyer. 517 00:29:47,952 --> 00:29:49,544 We don't have a lawyer. 518 00:29:49,621 --> 00:29:50,849 Aw. 519 00:29:50,922 --> 00:29:53,857 We can't call a lawyer, Harvey. lt's Sunday. 520 00:29:54,058 --> 00:29:57,425 Start with the piano, then the TV. Harvey. 521 00:30:31,262 --> 00:30:32,559 ♪♪[accordion playing] 522 00:30:34,566 --> 00:30:35,897 [people chattering] 523 00:30:52,150 --> 00:30:53,515 Thank you. 524 00:30:54,452 --> 00:30:56,181 (Agatha) AII right, everyone... 525 00:30:56,254 --> 00:31:00,953 get your cards and your buckets ready, and Iet"s begin. 526 00:31:01,025 --> 00:31:04,756 How is it going, Higgins? Splendidly, considering your Mr. lce Pick... 527 00:31:04,829 --> 00:31:06,820 cancelled on us at the last moment. 528 00:31:06,898 --> 00:31:09,628 We're just fortunate Agatha was available to fill in. 529 00:31:09,701 --> 00:31:12,693 Yeah, well, he felt real bad about that. He had to fly out. 530 00:31:12,770 --> 00:31:14,397 Contract dispute. 531 00:31:14,973 --> 00:31:16,770 (Rick) So, what's the take? 532 00:31:17,442 --> 00:31:18,534 The ''take''? 533 00:31:18,610 --> 00:31:22,046 l think we're all wondering if we've reached the 3,000 mark. 534 00:31:22,113 --> 00:31:26,447 Well, the total at this hour is $32,000-- $32,000? 535 00:31:28,486 --> 00:31:29,817 What? Oh. 536 00:31:33,491 --> 00:31:36,824 Thank you, Mr. Higgins. We don't know what to say. 537 00:31:36,895 --> 00:31:40,262 Well, that's just the total without taking into account the debit factor. 538 00:31:40,331 --> 00:31:42,891 The grand prize still has to come out of the gross receipts. 539 00:31:42,967 --> 00:31:45,162 $10,000. $10,000! 540 00:31:47,305 --> 00:31:51,401 Higgins, why? The grand prize is for the coverall finale. 541 00:31:51,476 --> 00:31:53,273 The winner must cover every number on the card. 542 00:31:53,344 --> 00:31:55,312 That's crazy. lt'll take all day. 543 00:31:55,380 --> 00:31:59,612 The numerical possibilities allow for a game of 45 minutes at the outside. 544 00:31:59,684 --> 00:32:03,017 l assume you'll both be purchasing cards? No, not me. 545 00:32:03,087 --> 00:32:05,851 Like l told Madge and Jeanie, l never win at these things. 546 00:32:05,924 --> 00:32:09,621 Mr. Calvin, it's for a good cause. lt really is. 547 00:32:12,830 --> 00:32:17,062 Under the ""G"" as in George, 51. (man) 548 00:32:17,402 --> 00:32:20,929 Bingo! Oh, how wonderfuI. We have a winner. 549 00:32:22,740 --> 00:32:23,934 CongratuIations. 550 00:32:24,008 --> 00:32:26,909 Thank you, Agatha, you"ve done a superb job. 551 00:32:26,978 --> 00:32:28,240 [people clapping] 552 00:32:33,117 --> 00:32:35,608 Ladies and gentIemen, may I have your attention, pIease? 553 00:32:35,687 --> 00:32:38,850 It"s time for the grand finaIe of the Bingo GaIa. 554 00:32:38,923 --> 00:32:40,584 This wiII be the coveraII noveIty match... 555 00:32:40,658 --> 00:32:42,182 in which the winning pIayer... 556 00:32:42,260 --> 00:32:45,787 must cover every number on the card, not just a singIe Iine... 557 00:32:45,863 --> 00:32:47,763 for a grand prize of $10,000. 558 00:32:47,865 --> 00:32:49,025 [all exclaiming] 559 00:32:49,100 --> 00:32:52,399 Is everyone seated comfortabIy? Then Iet"s begin. 560 00:32:58,910 --> 00:33:00,400 G-51. 561 00:33:00,478 --> 00:33:02,844 Under the ""G, "" 51. 562 00:33:02,914 --> 00:33:06,179 Odd, I once had occasion to use that exact combination... 563 00:33:06,250 --> 00:33:09,549 in connection with a secret code in a fIeet of submarines. 564 00:33:17,228 --> 00:33:20,254 I had the misfortune of Ianding in the middIe of a herd of goats... 565 00:33:20,331 --> 00:33:23,459 during the second WorId War when CIive Krefting... 566 00:33:23,534 --> 00:33:26,594 the piIot was rendered unconscious, by a gunshot wound. 567 00:33:26,671 --> 00:33:29,538 AIthough, I had no previous training in Ianding such an aircraft... 568 00:33:29,607 --> 00:33:31,336 I did manage to.... 569 00:33:33,845 --> 00:33:35,005 [yawning] 570 00:33:36,080 --> 00:33:39,641 But, perhaps, this isn"t the time for such recoIIections. 571 00:33:40,251 --> 00:33:41,878 That was B-13. 572 00:33:42,420 --> 00:33:44,911 Forty-five minutes on the outside... 573 00:33:44,989 --> 00:33:48,254 just inside of four hours. This must be a world record. 574 00:33:48,426 --> 00:33:50,894 [snoring] PIease watch your cards. We must have a winner. 575 00:33:50,962 --> 00:33:52,725 N-37. 576 00:33:53,264 --> 00:33:54,731 N-37. 577 00:33:55,500 --> 00:33:57,593 N-37! You won? 578 00:33:57,668 --> 00:34:00,228 T.C., you won. N-37. 579 00:34:02,073 --> 00:34:03,233 l won? 580 00:34:06,544 --> 00:34:07,772 ''N-37.'' 581 00:34:07,845 --> 00:34:09,369 [people chattering] 582 00:34:10,815 --> 00:34:12,009 l won. 583 00:34:14,285 --> 00:34:15,684 ♪♪[accordion playing] 584 00:34:17,288 --> 00:34:18,687 l won! 585 00:34:18,756 --> 00:34:22,021 l never won anything, since l won an Ellery Queen decoder ring... 586 00:34:22,093 --> 00:34:23,321 when l was seven years old! 587 00:34:23,394 --> 00:34:26,158 $10,000! 588 00:34:26,230 --> 00:34:28,130 l won! l won! 589 00:34:28,199 --> 00:34:30,224 Look, you know, l've always wondered what l would do... 590 00:34:30,301 --> 00:34:32,132 if l came into a large sum of money. 591 00:34:32,203 --> 00:34:35,036 Maybe, l'll make the down payment on a house. 592 00:34:35,940 --> 00:34:39,808 A down payment on a new heIicopter, or maybe expand my business. 593 00:34:39,877 --> 00:34:42,812 TraveI. Rio, Mardi Gras. 594 00:34:43,414 --> 00:34:44,676 [whooping] 595 00:34:45,283 --> 00:34:46,477 [T.C. Iaughing] 596 00:34:51,923 --> 00:34:55,825 But, shoot. If I did that, I"d have to come up with... 597 00:34:56,961 --> 00:34:59,054 a whoIe new bunch of dreams. 598 00:35:00,565 --> 00:35:03,932 So, if it"s aII the same with you guys... 599 00:35:04,669 --> 00:35:07,661 I"d rather give my $10,000 prize... 600 00:35:08,172 --> 00:35:11,369 to the FountainbIeu Residence Purchase Fund. 601 00:35:11,509 --> 00:35:12,737 [all clapping] 602 00:35:12,810 --> 00:35:13,799 Oh. 603 00:35:26,624 --> 00:35:30,025 $39,61 7. 604 00:35:34,165 --> 00:35:37,259 (Magnum) Those IittIe faiIure cIouds were starting to bIow away. 605 00:35:37,335 --> 00:35:38,996 True, I"d Iost a day and a haIf... 606 00:35:39,070 --> 00:35:41,129 trying to track down Madge and Jeanie"s property... 607 00:35:41,205 --> 00:35:43,435 but, finaIIy, I"d hit pay dirt. 608 00:35:43,508 --> 00:35:45,476 The goods were on their way back to the hoteI. 609 00:35:45,543 --> 00:35:46,908 And in about an hour... 610 00:35:46,978 --> 00:35:50,106 I wouId take Madge and Jeanie to put a down payment on the FountainbIeu. 611 00:35:50,181 --> 00:35:52,945 [tape rewinding] The onIy dark cIoud Ieft was the Day-N-Dark robberies. 612 00:35:53,017 --> 00:35:56,111 I knew there was a thread somewhere, something simpIe that I"d overIooked. 613 00:35:56,187 --> 00:35:57,950 But I couIdn"t think what it was. 614 00:35:58,022 --> 00:36:00,320 (Rick on answering machine) Yeah, Thomas, I heard from Ice Pick. 615 00:36:00,391 --> 00:36:01,858 He got the registration on the car. 616 00:36:01,926 --> 00:36:04,918 Yeah? OnIy thing is, it"s kind of weird. 617 00:36:04,996 --> 00:36:07,794 It doesn"t make any sense. What? What? 618 00:36:07,865 --> 00:36:10,333 The Camaro beIongs to a guy named BiIIy Princeton... 619 00:36:10,401 --> 00:36:14,735 but here"s the weird part, the pIates on it beIong to a "38 Caddy... 620 00:36:14,805 --> 00:36:18,935 and it"s registered to a Jeanine K. and Margaret L. LaSaIIe. 621 00:36:19,043 --> 00:36:20,442 [tape rewinding] 622 00:36:21,012 --> 00:36:24,311 ...a "38 Caddy and it"s registered to a Jeanine K... 623 00:36:24,382 --> 00:36:26,077 and Margaret L. LaSaIIe. 624 00:36:26,317 --> 00:36:28,945 Thomas, those are the LaSaIIe sisters. 625 00:36:30,788 --> 00:36:31,777 [birds chirping] 626 00:36:31,856 --> 00:36:35,257 (Higgins) Perhaps the plates were stolen from Madge and Jeanie's car. 627 00:36:35,927 --> 00:36:39,556 lt doesn't make sense. He nearly runs two ladies over... 628 00:36:39,630 --> 00:36:41,530 and then tracks them down and steals their plates? 629 00:36:41,599 --> 00:36:42,588 l see your point. 630 00:36:42,667 --> 00:36:45,101 Madge and Jeanie did not want me to trace that car. 631 00:36:45,169 --> 00:36:46,568 They know the guy. 632 00:36:46,637 --> 00:36:49,470 Who are you calling? The LaSalle sisters. 633 00:36:50,074 --> 00:36:51,302 [phone ringing] 634 00:36:52,009 --> 00:36:54,807 (Johnnie) HeIIo? Johnnie? lt's me, Tommy. 635 00:36:54,879 --> 00:36:57,109 May l speak to Madge or Jeanie for a minute? 636 00:36:57,181 --> 00:36:58,808 Magnum, aren't they with you? 637 00:36:58,883 --> 00:37:01,545 l haven't seen them since before the bingo party yesterday. 638 00:37:01,619 --> 00:37:03,644 They didn't come back here last night. 639 00:37:03,721 --> 00:37:05,484 Herman said they were waiting to see you. 640 00:37:05,556 --> 00:37:08,047 We figured you might have asked them to stay over. 641 00:37:08,125 --> 00:37:10,593 Magnum, where are they? 642 00:37:10,828 --> 00:37:13,228 [sighing] They were carrying $39,000. 643 00:37:15,333 --> 00:37:17,130 Something must have happened to them. 644 00:37:17,201 --> 00:37:18,998 I"m caIIing the cops. No. 645 00:37:19,070 --> 00:37:21,937 Just give me a couple of hours, l think l know where they might be. 646 00:37:22,006 --> 00:37:23,371 l'll call you as soon as l find them. 647 00:37:23,441 --> 00:37:24,999 Magnum, there's something you ought to see. 648 00:37:25,076 --> 00:37:26,805 What? My old yearbook. 649 00:37:26,877 --> 00:37:30,244 Higgins, not now. This is regarding the LaSalle sisters. 650 00:37:30,314 --> 00:37:33,772 l first saw them 37 years ago this July. 651 00:37:34,352 --> 00:37:36,013 And? Do you recall that when the sisters... 652 00:37:36,087 --> 00:37:38,078 first came to tea, l had the curious sensation... 653 00:37:38,155 --> 00:37:41,488 of having known them before? What's your point, Higgins? l'm in a hurry. 654 00:37:41,559 --> 00:37:43,789 The LaSalle sisters were performers. 655 00:37:43,861 --> 00:37:45,795 This is the theatre program from Blackpool... 656 00:37:45,863 --> 00:37:48,423 the summer l completed my upper second at Sandhurst. 657 00:37:48,499 --> 00:37:50,660 My father felt that some sort of family celebration... 658 00:37:50,735 --> 00:37:52,726 of my accomplishment was in order, although... 659 00:37:52,803 --> 00:37:54,566 of course, l never admitted this to Father... 660 00:37:54,639 --> 00:37:57,233 Blackpool was a bit gaudy, by my standards. 661 00:37:57,575 --> 00:37:59,202 They were quick change artists. 662 00:37:59,277 --> 00:38:02,474 Well, that's hardly the description for a classic performance. 663 00:38:02,546 --> 00:38:05,310 They presented a unique multi-charactered mime. 664 00:38:05,383 --> 00:38:09,080 Just the two of them. Quite an extraordinary display of.... 665 00:38:09,153 --> 00:38:10,142 [door closing] 666 00:38:11,756 --> 00:38:16,090 Ollie, it isn't fair of you to ask this of us. And not very bright. 667 00:38:16,360 --> 00:38:18,351 The cash registers were one thing... 668 00:38:18,429 --> 00:38:22,866 but, $150,000 is a very serious crime. 669 00:38:22,933 --> 00:38:26,562 Girls, believe me, now this is fair. And you owe me. 670 00:38:26,637 --> 00:38:29,401 Why do you think l didn't turn you in after the first robbery, huh? 671 00:38:29,473 --> 00:38:32,135 All these other jobs, they were just a warm-up for this one. 672 00:38:32,209 --> 00:38:35,303 Forget it. Okay. 673 00:38:35,413 --> 00:38:37,074 You really wanna forget it, huh? 674 00:38:37,148 --> 00:38:39,810 That bingo money belongs to Johnnie... 675 00:38:39,884 --> 00:38:43,786 and Herman and all the other people at the Fountainbleu. 676 00:38:43,854 --> 00:38:47,551 And they'll get it back just as soon as you pull this job. 677 00:38:48,125 --> 00:38:49,319 Ollie... 678 00:38:51,662 --> 00:38:53,892 there aren't going to be any guns. 679 00:38:54,332 --> 00:38:57,460 Promise me. l promise. No guns. 680 00:39:02,573 --> 00:39:04,905 (Magnum) Footnote to the dissertation on faiIure. 681 00:39:04,975 --> 00:39:06,442 My IittIe voice had convinced me... 682 00:39:06,510 --> 00:39:10,571 that aII my faiIures of the Iast few days had been carefuIIy pIanned. 683 00:39:10,648 --> 00:39:12,411 It was aIso saying... 684 00:39:12,483 --> 00:39:16,647 ""Thomas, despite what the LaSaIIe sisters have Ied you to beIieve... 685 00:39:16,721 --> 00:39:20,680 ""you are a functioning aduIt, and proving it is sometimes... 686 00:39:20,758 --> 00:39:22,316 ""very painfuI. "" 687 00:39:22,393 --> 00:39:25,191 Please, go away. l want to buy something. 688 00:39:29,934 --> 00:39:31,561 What time's the big pick up? 689 00:39:31,635 --> 00:39:33,102 What are you talking about? 690 00:39:33,938 --> 00:39:35,132 Miss Wilcox... 691 00:39:35,206 --> 00:39:38,607 l happen to know that Day-N-Dark is too cheap to pay armed guards... 692 00:39:38,676 --> 00:39:40,735 overtime for holidays. Too cheap? 693 00:39:40,811 --> 00:39:44,474 Which means that all the money from all the stores is in one location. 694 00:39:45,216 --> 00:39:46,547 One guard. 695 00:39:47,051 --> 00:39:48,848 lt's here, isn't it? 696 00:39:49,520 --> 00:39:52,182 They come for the money at 1 2:00, but l don't need any help. 697 00:39:52,256 --> 00:39:56,215 You have been replaced by a very competent Day-N-Dark security guard. 698 00:39:56,293 --> 00:39:58,056 Where is he? ln the back. 699 00:39:58,129 --> 00:39:59,118 Fine. 700 00:39:59,196 --> 00:40:01,858 l'll need to see those reports that l left behind on the robberies. 701 00:40:01,932 --> 00:40:03,832 You know, the photos, police interviews, all of that. 702 00:40:03,901 --> 00:40:05,960 You did not leave the reports, Magnum. 703 00:40:06,036 --> 00:40:09,233 You were asked to return them after you were fired. 704 00:40:09,306 --> 00:40:13,970 Miss Wilcox, please. You have over $150,000 in your office. 705 00:40:14,044 --> 00:40:15,409 lf that money is stolen... 706 00:40:15,479 --> 00:40:17,845 l don't think your bosses are gonna be too happy with you. 707 00:40:17,915 --> 00:40:21,009 So, can l please see those police reports? No. 708 00:40:22,887 --> 00:40:23,979 [sighing] 709 00:40:25,890 --> 00:40:27,653 Yes, may l help you? 710 00:40:30,694 --> 00:40:31,820 $1 .98. 711 00:40:31,896 --> 00:40:34,888 All right, let's see, that's $1 .98 a pound. 712 00:40:35,433 --> 00:40:37,765 This is $3.49. 713 00:40:37,902 --> 00:40:39,096 $5.67. 714 00:40:45,242 --> 00:40:46,573 Thank you. 715 00:40:55,853 --> 00:40:57,787 You stole the reports. Here. 716 00:40:57,855 --> 00:40:59,379 lt didn't seem important at the time... 717 00:40:59,457 --> 00:41:01,049 but it happened at every one of the robberies. 718 00:41:01,125 --> 00:41:03,252 ''10:05, nun slipped on wet floor. 719 00:41:03,327 --> 00:41:05,795 ''Cash register attendant ran to her assistance. 720 00:41:05,863 --> 00:41:08,593 ''10:09, attendant returned to find register empty. 721 00:41:08,666 --> 00:41:10,361 ''2:16, elderly man fainted. 722 00:41:10,434 --> 00:41:13,961 ''Day-N-Dark attendant called paramedics, returning to find cash register empty.'' 723 00:41:14,038 --> 00:41:16,632 All right, proving what? Proving.... 724 00:41:19,043 --> 00:41:22,535 Proving that none of us are infallible when it comes to judging character. 725 00:42:21,939 --> 00:42:23,065 [exclaiming] 726 00:42:23,274 --> 00:42:25,003 Oh, l knocked down.... 727 00:42:25,075 --> 00:42:27,976 Oh. Oh, my knee. 728 00:42:30,514 --> 00:42:31,811 Nice move, Madge. 729 00:42:31,882 --> 00:42:35,340 Although, l thought the nun's outfit was a nicer touch. 730 00:42:35,753 --> 00:42:38,449 Yeah, how's this for a nice touch, huh? 731 00:42:38,856 --> 00:42:41,518 Ollie, you promised. No guns. Hey, l lied. 732 00:42:41,792 --> 00:42:42,986 [exclaiming] 733 00:42:44,194 --> 00:42:47,857 (Jeanie) You dirty rat. You promised no guns. 734 00:42:47,932 --> 00:42:50,628 How dare you bring a gun in here? He's the one. 735 00:42:50,701 --> 00:42:54,330 You stinking raccoon! How dare you bring a gun in here? 736 00:42:54,405 --> 00:42:55,895 You promised. 737 00:43:09,453 --> 00:43:10,943 (Magnum) l still don't see... 738 00:43:11,021 --> 00:43:12,989 why you had to call the police right away. 739 00:43:13,057 --> 00:43:16,220 A crime has been committed, or perhaps you didn't notice. 740 00:43:16,293 --> 00:43:18,557 Of course l noticed. Well, if you don't mind... 741 00:43:18,629 --> 00:43:21,962 l would like to finish my report before they get here. 742 00:43:22,032 --> 00:43:23,465 (Madge) Ollie was the guard... 743 00:43:23,534 --> 00:43:27,800 at the very first Day-N-Dark we tried to rob. 744 00:43:27,871 --> 00:43:31,034 Jeanie was a high school boy getting a soft drink. 745 00:43:31,108 --> 00:43:34,077 l was a housewife waiting to check out. 746 00:43:36,747 --> 00:43:40,740 Ollie was outside waiting for us by our car. 747 00:43:41,385 --> 00:43:45,685 He said, ''High School boys don't wear cameo rings.'' 748 00:43:46,757 --> 00:43:49,692 lt always worked best when l played the men. 749 00:43:51,829 --> 00:43:56,425 After that first time, Oliver actually hit the registers. 750 00:43:56,500 --> 00:43:59,298 Yes, but that doesn't change the fact that you took the money. 751 00:43:59,370 --> 00:44:03,739 They'll give it back. Well, l'm not so sure about that. 752 00:44:03,807 --> 00:44:07,743 lt's all gone. Little expenses, damage to the car. 753 00:44:07,811 --> 00:44:09,836 The color TV, and Herman's piano... 754 00:44:09,913 --> 00:44:12,848 and the cable money, and the stereo for Millie. 755 00:44:13,250 --> 00:44:15,718 You guys bought those things and told the people at the hotel... 756 00:44:15,786 --> 00:44:17,845 it was from their relatives, right? 757 00:44:17,921 --> 00:44:21,914 You forgot David's recliner and Margaret's gall bladder... 758 00:44:22,226 --> 00:44:25,389 Duke's heart pacer, and Ralph's cordless telephone. 759 00:44:25,462 --> 00:44:28,260 Oh, we made sure everybody got something. 760 00:44:29,133 --> 00:44:30,691 (Heather) l can understand the operations. 761 00:44:30,768 --> 00:44:33,566 But why didn't you pay your rent, instead of buying toys? 762 00:44:33,637 --> 00:44:34,695 Toys? 763 00:44:34,772 --> 00:44:38,003 But they're just as important as operations, the rent. 764 00:44:39,043 --> 00:44:42,774 Sometimes health and having a place to live aren't important... 765 00:44:42,846 --> 00:44:44,746 unless you have a reason to live. 766 00:44:45,049 --> 00:44:46,949 Take Johnnie Wells. 767 00:44:47,017 --> 00:44:50,783 How long do you think he'd survive without his love for baseball? 768 00:44:51,455 --> 00:44:52,615 A television set... 769 00:44:52,690 --> 00:44:54,521 is just as important to his life... 770 00:44:54,958 --> 00:44:57,859 as a new heart pacer is to Duke's. 771 00:44:58,328 --> 00:44:59,852 And Herman... 772 00:45:00,297 --> 00:45:04,028 take away his piano, and he'll turn into a vegetable. 773 00:45:05,069 --> 00:45:08,038 No way to communicate... 774 00:45:09,139 --> 00:45:10,538 nothing to live for. 775 00:45:13,377 --> 00:45:15,106 We're here for the suspects. 776 00:45:17,247 --> 00:45:20,114 Ladies, no matter how noble your motive... 777 00:45:22,052 --> 00:45:23,644 it was still stealing. 778 00:45:23,887 --> 00:45:27,186 Miss Wilcox. Heather, please... 779 00:45:28,225 --> 00:45:31,888 we've got the bingo money from Oliver. They've got $40,000. 780 00:45:31,962 --> 00:45:35,420 They can pay back every cent they've stolen and Oliver's share... 781 00:45:35,499 --> 00:45:38,696 and besides, they did assist in stopping the big heist. 782 00:45:38,769 --> 00:45:40,634 No, dear, she's right. 783 00:45:40,771 --> 00:45:43,899 We committed a crime and we must pay. 784 00:45:46,043 --> 00:45:48,603 l just wondered, if we could... 785 00:45:48,679 --> 00:45:52,240 just change our clothes before they take us away. 786 00:45:59,123 --> 00:46:00,715 Oh... 787 00:46:00,791 --> 00:46:03,282 when the store gets back its money... 788 00:46:04,027 --> 00:46:05,858 would you take the rest to Johnnie? 789 00:46:05,996 --> 00:46:08,396 They can still make a down payment on the hotel. 790 00:46:08,866 --> 00:46:10,527 You can give it to him yourselves. 791 00:46:10,601 --> 00:46:13,069 Oh, l'm not so sure, Thomas. 792 00:46:13,737 --> 00:46:16,672 We're going to be away for a long, long time. 793 00:46:17,074 --> 00:46:19,269 That's ridiculous, you're.... 794 00:46:20,978 --> 00:46:23,776 You called me Thomas. Naturally. 795 00:46:24,948 --> 00:46:27,348 Tommy's a little boy with an all-day sucker. 796 00:46:28,018 --> 00:46:29,212 Thomas... 797 00:46:29,853 --> 00:46:32,879 is much more fitting for a private investigator. 798 00:46:35,392 --> 00:46:36,916 We'll be right back. 799 00:46:43,600 --> 00:46:44,692 [door closing] 800 00:47:15,732 --> 00:47:18,724 Oh, well, l hope you're happy. They got away. 801 00:47:18,802 --> 00:47:21,703 Do you realize how many forms l'm going to have to fill out for this? 802 00:47:21,772 --> 00:47:23,069 Why is it my fault? 803 00:47:23,140 --> 00:47:25,301 You're the one who said they could change their clothes. 804 00:47:25,375 --> 00:47:29,675 Oh, sure, try to shift the responsibility. How like you. 805 00:47:29,746 --> 00:47:30,735 Me? 806 00:47:31,081 --> 00:47:34,414 Me? You don't even know me. 807 00:47:34,464 --> 00:47:39,014 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 65833

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