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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,000 Synced and corrected by Katniss Everdeen. www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:03,506 --> 00:00:06,875 Oh! Extra-thick gym socks? 3 00:00:06,877 --> 00:00:08,410 Thank you, Dad! 4 00:00:09,879 --> 00:00:12,681 Okay, so somebody else open a present. 5 00:00:12,683 --> 00:00:15,217 It's Christmas Eve and Momma's got a family newsletter to write 6 00:00:15,219 --> 00:00:17,219 and a big meal to cook, so let's get this 7 00:00:17,221 --> 00:00:19,187 wonderful family tradition over with. 8 00:00:19,189 --> 00:00:22,691 And also, Merry Christmas. 9 00:00:22,693 --> 00:00:28,296 It is a Rooney custom to open one gift on the morning of Christmas Eve. 10 00:00:28,298 --> 00:00:29,331 Yeah. 11 00:00:29,333 --> 00:00:31,199 When Joey was five, he whined and whined 12 00:00:31,201 --> 00:00:34,002 and whined until Mom and Dad finally let him 13 00:00:34,004 --> 00:00:36,171 open one present a day early. Hmph. 14 00:00:36,173 --> 00:00:39,508 He also whined when he was six, seven, eight, and nine. 15 00:00:39,510 --> 00:00:46,048 And by the time I was 13, a Christmas tradition was born. 16 00:00:46,050 --> 00:00:48,016 I've got my own tradition. 17 00:00:48,018 --> 00:00:51,420 I always get Mom a book of coupons she can redeem for cutesy things, 18 00:00:51,422 --> 00:00:55,257 like smiles and hugs, none of which cost me a dime. 19 00:00:55,259 --> 00:00:59,361 Christmas is a cow, and I milk it for all it's worth. 20 00:00:59,363 --> 00:01:00,729 Christmas milk. 21 00:01:00,731 --> 00:01:03,598 Feliz Navidad, mis amigos. 22 00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:05,400 Here, Mommy! Open my present! 23 00:01:05,402 --> 00:01:06,368 No! No, no, no, no, no! 24 00:01:06,370 --> 00:01:07,402 I wanna go next! 25 00:01:07,404 --> 00:01:09,771 I wanna see what my little bro gave me! 26 00:01:09,773 --> 00:01:13,275 Momma! Momma, pleeeeease? 27 00:01:13,277 --> 00:01:15,911 Okay, Whiney. I mean, Joey. 28 00:01:15,913 --> 00:01:17,679 (Chuckles) 29 00:01:20,349 --> 00:01:21,683 (Gasps) 30 00:01:21,685 --> 00:01:25,620 A handmade Parker Coupon Book?! 31 00:01:25,622 --> 00:01:27,089 Sickness! 32 00:01:28,458 --> 00:01:30,625 That wasn't for Joey! That was for Mom! 33 00:01:30,627 --> 00:01:32,527 I must've switched the boxes! 34 00:01:32,529 --> 00:01:34,796 - No! Joey, you got the wrong gift. - Wait. 35 00:01:34,798 --> 00:01:37,566 Okay, hold on. A foot massage... 36 00:01:37,568 --> 00:01:41,470 a ten-second nose nuzzle... 37 00:01:41,472 --> 00:01:44,473 "Parky's Hug-tacular Love-A-Thon"? 38 00:01:45,741 --> 00:01:47,809 What? 39 00:01:47,811 --> 00:01:50,779 You seriously gave these coupons to Joey? 40 00:01:50,781 --> 00:01:54,916 Okay, there is no way Parker gave me a book 41 00:01:54,918 --> 00:01:58,086 full of coupons for free snuggles on purpose. 42 00:01:58,088 --> 00:02:04,126 But I am not passing up a Christmas with Parker as my personal play toy. 43 00:02:05,962 --> 00:02:09,397 I will take the "One-Minute Hug of Joy," please. 44 00:02:09,399 --> 00:02:12,334 Joey, I'm not doing any of those coupons for you. 45 00:02:12,336 --> 00:02:13,802 It's a stupid, meaningless book. 46 00:02:13,804 --> 00:02:15,270 Really, Parker? 47 00:02:15,272 --> 00:02:17,405 Was it stupid and meaningless when you gave it to me 48 00:02:17,407 --> 00:02:18,740 for the past eight years? 49 00:02:21,511 --> 00:02:24,579 Well, uh, what had... what had happened was... 50 00:02:24,581 --> 00:02:27,749 Then you will have no problem honoring those coupons. 51 00:02:27,751 --> 00:02:31,353 And if not... no presents for you this Christmas. 52 00:02:31,355 --> 00:02:32,787 - What? - (Gasps) 53 00:02:32,789 --> 00:02:34,356 Parker: Fine. 54 00:02:34,358 --> 00:02:37,292 One "Hug of Joy" coming up. 55 00:02:37,294 --> 00:02:39,628 Father, will you time this? 56 00:02:39,630 --> 00:02:41,830 I wanna get my full 60 seconds. 57 00:02:43,533 --> 00:02:45,167 - And go. - (Timer beeps) 58 00:02:45,169 --> 00:02:47,002 - Mm! - (Groans) 59 00:02:49,205 --> 00:02:51,106 (Theme music playing) 60 00:02:51,108 --> 00:02:52,541 Better in stereo 61 00:02:52,543 --> 00:02:54,643 B-B-Better in stereo 62 00:02:54,645 --> 00:02:56,678 - I'm up with the sunshine - Let's go 63 00:02:56,680 --> 00:02:59,181 - I lace up my high-tops - Oh, no 64 00:02:59,183 --> 00:03:01,049 Slam dunk, ready or not 65 00:03:01,051 --> 00:03:02,784 Yeah, show me what you got 66 00:03:02,786 --> 00:03:05,287 - I'm under the spotlight - Holler 67 00:03:05,289 --> 00:03:07,289 I dare you, come on and follow 68 00:03:07,291 --> 00:03:09,558 You dance to your own beat 69 00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:11,560 I'll sing the melody 70 00:03:11,562 --> 00:03:14,196 When you say yea-ah-ah 71 00:03:14,198 --> 00:03:16,031 I say no-oh-oh 72 00:03:16,033 --> 00:03:18,366 When you say stop 73 00:03:18,368 --> 00:03:20,735 All I want to do is go, go, go 74 00:03:20,737 --> 00:03:23,738 You, you, the other half of me, me 75 00:03:23,740 --> 00:03:25,740 The half I'll never be-e 76 00:03:25,742 --> 00:03:29,578 The half that drives me crazy 77 00:03:29,580 --> 00:03:32,380 You, you, the better half of me, me 78 00:03:32,382 --> 00:03:34,983 The half I'll always need 79 00:03:34,985 --> 00:03:36,551 But we both know 80 00:03:36,553 --> 00:03:38,787 We're better in stereo 81 00:03:40,656 --> 00:03:41,723 (Lightning cracks) 82 00:03:51,067 --> 00:03:53,802 Well, that's never happened before. 83 00:03:55,238 --> 00:03:56,671 (Beep) 84 00:03:56,673 --> 00:03:59,941 Zaydock: We meet again, SkyVolt. 85 00:03:59,943 --> 00:04:01,243 Zaydock! 86 00:04:02,378 --> 00:04:03,878 What do you want? 87 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:08,250 It's not what I want, it's what I have... 88 00:04:08,252 --> 00:04:11,086 your friend, Garrison. 89 00:04:11,088 --> 00:04:16,591 If you want him back, meet me here. 90 00:04:16,593 --> 00:04:18,426 - And cut! - (Ringing) 91 00:04:18,428 --> 00:04:20,262 That's a wrap for the holidays. 92 00:04:21,297 --> 00:04:23,465 That was fantastic, Liv. 93 00:04:23,467 --> 00:04:26,434 Ah, nothing says Christmas like a glowing alien relic! 94 00:04:27,737 --> 00:04:30,038 Pretty sure Christmas has never said that. 95 00:04:30,040 --> 00:04:32,374 (Sighs) Doesn't say a lot of things, kid. 96 00:04:32,376 --> 00:04:35,377 Never said I'd be spending Christmas Eve here in Stevens Point. 97 00:04:35,379 --> 00:04:38,546 Oh, what? I thought you were flying back to LA to see your mom. 98 00:04:38,548 --> 00:04:42,651 Ah, no flights until tomorrow, so what's left of the crew is stuck here... 99 00:04:42,653 --> 00:04:43,818 (Chuckles) 100 00:04:43,820 --> 00:04:46,221 away from friends and family. 101 00:04:48,090 --> 00:04:51,092 No! Gemma, I'm so sorry. 102 00:04:51,094 --> 00:04:52,294 (Sighs) 103 00:04:52,296 --> 00:04:54,396 Liv Rooney, look at me. 104 00:04:54,398 --> 00:04:55,897 Closer. 105 00:04:55,899 --> 00:04:58,566 Gemma will be okay. 106 00:04:58,568 --> 00:05:00,635 McCorky's 24-Hour Diner is open, and they sell 107 00:05:00,637 --> 00:05:02,504 something called a Garbage Plate. 108 00:05:02,506 --> 00:05:06,241 Nothing says Christmas like Dumpster Fries! 109 00:05:07,310 --> 00:05:10,378 Christmas speaks way differently to you than everyone else. 110 00:05:11,947 --> 00:05:15,483 Hey, why don't you guys all have dinner at my house? 111 00:05:15,485 --> 00:05:16,951 Are you sure? 112 00:05:16,953 --> 00:05:18,753 I come to eat. 113 00:05:20,122 --> 00:05:24,626 Yeah. I mean, my mom always makes the most amazing Christmas Eve dinner, 114 00:05:24,628 --> 00:05:26,761 and I would love to share it with my new Voltage family. 115 00:05:26,763 --> 00:05:28,630 Thanks, Liv! 116 00:05:28,632 --> 00:05:31,966 Nothing says Christmas like kindness and goodwill to others! 117 00:05:31,968 --> 00:05:33,668 - Was that better? - Nailed it! 118 00:05:40,476 --> 00:05:44,479 Ho, ho, hello, Stevens Point! 119 00:05:44,481 --> 00:05:46,681 It's your ol' pal, Johnny Nimbus, 120 00:05:46,683 --> 00:05:50,518 spreading Christmas cheer here at the Ridgewood Porcu-Present Giveaway! 121 00:05:50,520 --> 00:05:51,886 Look who've I found! 122 00:05:51,888 --> 00:05:54,189 Hey there, Santa! How you feelin'? 123 00:05:58,661 --> 00:06:00,462 Christmas. 124 00:06:00,464 --> 00:06:03,631 Ha! We are crushing this present wrapping, Maddie! 125 00:06:03,633 --> 00:06:07,369 I can feel the Christmas spirit just oozing out of my eyeballs! 126 00:06:08,571 --> 00:06:14,743 Um... so hey... before we hand out all these presents to the kids, 127 00:06:14,745 --> 00:06:16,745 I got you something. 128 00:06:16,747 --> 00:06:17,746 Oh! 129 00:06:20,549 --> 00:06:22,150 (Stifles laugh) 130 00:06:26,255 --> 00:06:27,822 What is this? 131 00:06:27,824 --> 00:06:29,457 (Stifles laugh) 132 00:06:31,160 --> 00:06:33,628 That is a lump of coal. 133 00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:40,668 But that's what Santa gives kids on the naughty list. 134 00:06:40,670 --> 00:06:42,203 I've been a good girl. 135 00:06:42,205 --> 00:06:43,571 Why are you giving me this?! 136 00:06:45,674 --> 00:06:47,275 (Chortles) 137 00:06:47,277 --> 00:06:49,844 W... Willow, relax. 138 00:06:49,846 --> 00:06:51,546 It's... it's just a joke. 139 00:06:51,548 --> 00:06:52,847 - It's not your real present. - (Scoffs) 140 00:06:52,849 --> 00:06:53,882 No. 141 00:06:53,884 --> 00:06:55,617 Jokes make you laugh and feel like you have 142 00:06:55,619 --> 00:06:57,619 an ice cream sandwich in your tummy. 143 00:06:57,621 --> 00:06:59,354 This feels like a rotten, old shoe! 144 00:07:01,090 --> 00:07:02,857 No. 145 00:07:02,859 --> 00:07:07,195 I just like you so much that I felt comfortable giving you a gift 146 00:07:07,197 --> 00:07:11,299 with an itty-bitty mean component to its overall hilarious makeup. 147 00:07:11,301 --> 00:07:13,902 Oh. Oh. 148 00:07:13,904 --> 00:07:16,368 Well, then let me show you how much I like you. 149 00:07:16,399 --> 00:07:17,168 All right. 150 00:07:19,141 --> 00:07:22,944 I bought you a piece of the court where we won the state championship. 151 00:07:23,913 --> 00:07:25,680 - Aww... - (Mockingly) Aww... 152 00:07:27,650 --> 00:07:29,384 Get it? 153 00:07:29,386 --> 00:07:30,952 Hilarious! 154 00:07:33,422 --> 00:07:35,490 (Sighs) Here. 155 00:07:35,492 --> 00:07:36,658 Your coupon is honored. 156 00:07:36,660 --> 00:07:40,028 One "This is How Much I Love You" bulletin board. 157 00:07:41,664 --> 00:07:42,831 Karen: Oh... 158 00:07:42,833 --> 00:07:46,000 I don't know how I'm gonna get everything done. 159 00:07:46,002 --> 00:07:50,004 I haven't even started cooking Momma's famous Christmas Eve dinner yet. 160 00:07:50,006 --> 00:07:51,072 Well... 161 00:07:51,074 --> 00:07:53,842 I'd offer you my "Draw Me a Bath" coupon... 162 00:07:53,844 --> 00:07:54,776 Oh. 163 00:07:54,778 --> 00:07:56,945 But I kinda need it for myself. 164 00:07:56,947 --> 00:07:58,480 (Chuckles) 165 00:07:58,482 --> 00:08:01,149 Double bubble me, bro. 166 00:08:01,151 --> 00:08:04,285 You don't have to use all the coupons in the same day, Munch. 167 00:08:04,287 --> 00:08:06,254 You're supposed to spread them out! 168 00:08:06,256 --> 00:08:08,623 Hey, I don't know if I'll be here tomorrow. 169 00:08:08,625 --> 00:08:10,258 I could get hit by a bus. 170 00:08:11,694 --> 00:08:12,760 Don't tease me. 171 00:08:17,500 --> 00:08:18,700 Hey, Mom! 172 00:08:18,702 --> 00:08:21,703 Oh, your hair looks amazing! Merry Christmas! 173 00:08:21,705 --> 00:08:23,438 I invited Gemma and some of the Voltage crew 174 00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:24,772 over for dinner tonight. Is that okay? 175 00:08:24,774 --> 00:08:26,374 Did I mention your hair looks amazing? 176 00:08:26,376 --> 00:08:28,009 Please, please, please. Thank you. I love you. Hair looks great. 177 00:08:28,011 --> 00:08:29,677 Okay. 178 00:08:29,679 --> 00:08:31,980 It's going to be tough, but there is always room 179 00:08:31,982 --> 00:08:34,148 for more at Momma's famous Christmas Eve dinner. 180 00:08:34,150 --> 00:08:35,884 So, now keep out of the kitchen. 181 00:08:35,886 --> 00:08:38,720 Oh, and... and tell Joey to put out the fancy toilet paper. 182 00:08:38,722 --> 00:08:40,355 We have guests now. 183 00:08:40,357 --> 00:08:41,890 (Doorbell) 184 00:08:48,531 --> 00:08:49,831 Hello, Artie. 185 00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:52,767 Your lord of leaping is here. 186 00:08:56,705 --> 00:08:57,739 What do you want? 187 00:08:57,741 --> 00:09:00,875 Well, I made you a seasonal treat. 188 00:09:00,877 --> 00:09:02,544 Minions, reveal. 189 00:09:09,051 --> 00:09:11,986 An exact replica of our future home. 190 00:09:14,423 --> 00:09:19,093 A gingerbread house from your ginger-haired suitor. 191 00:09:20,930 --> 00:09:22,830 Minions, we ride! 192 00:09:22,832 --> 00:09:25,333 There are stockings to be hung by the chimney with care 193 00:09:25,335 --> 00:09:27,835 in hopes that Liv Rooney soon will be there. 194 00:09:31,774 --> 00:09:34,842 All right, here are your presents, Coach Santa. 195 00:09:34,844 --> 00:09:36,444 Watch out for lap tinklers. 196 00:09:37,780 --> 00:09:39,948 Where were you an hour go? 197 00:09:41,750 --> 00:09:45,420 Uh, hey, Willow, do you mind if you give me back that coal? 198 00:09:45,422 --> 00:09:47,455 'Cause I really wanna... wanna give it to Liv. 199 00:09:47,457 --> 00:09:48,523 Yeah, sure. 200 00:09:48,525 --> 00:09:51,192 And after that, you can spit in her face and say "Merry Christmas." 201 00:09:52,394 --> 00:09:54,262 Hilarious! 202 00:09:57,866 --> 00:09:59,601 The coal was right here. 203 00:10:00,603 --> 00:10:01,936 (Gasps) 204 00:10:03,706 --> 00:10:06,140 You don't think we accidentally wrapped it, do you? 205 00:10:06,142 --> 00:10:09,877 I hope not, or some kid is gonna think Santa's given them coal for Christmas! 206 00:10:09,879 --> 00:10:10,945 (Gasps) 207 00:10:10,947 --> 00:10:13,448 This is so bad. We gotta find it. 208 00:10:13,450 --> 00:10:14,882 'Cause, I mean, anyone who gets a lump of coal 209 00:10:14,884 --> 00:10:16,551 is just gonna burst into tears. 210 00:10:20,956 --> 00:10:22,991 Do you even hear yourself? 211 00:10:26,829 --> 00:10:28,029 (Phone rings) 212 00:10:31,100 --> 00:10:32,634 (Beep) 213 00:10:32,636 --> 00:10:35,536 North Pole, Liv Rooney speaking. (Chuckles) 214 00:10:37,406 --> 00:10:41,876 No. Um, we did not order dinner from Wishnefsky's Deli. 215 00:10:42,978 --> 00:10:44,979 Okay. Thank you. Happy holidays. 216 00:10:44,981 --> 00:10:46,648 Watch out for reindeer! (Chuckles) 217 00:10:48,651 --> 00:10:50,118 Who was on the phone, honey? 218 00:10:50,120 --> 00:10:51,953 Um, Wishnefsky's Deli. 219 00:10:51,955 --> 00:10:53,154 They thought we ordered dinner from them, 220 00:10:53,156 --> 00:10:55,189 - but I told them we didn't need it. - (Chuckles) 221 00:10:55,191 --> 00:10:57,859 Take-out from a deli on Christmas Eve? 222 00:10:57,861 --> 00:10:59,360 Who would do such a thing? 223 00:10:59,362 --> 00:11:00,923 What have you done?! Give me the phone! 224 00:11:02,364 --> 00:11:04,499 What... what... Mom, Mom, Mom! 225 00:11:04,501 --> 00:11:05,967 Why are you freaking out? 226 00:11:05,969 --> 00:11:07,502 Why would we order dinner from a deli 227 00:11:07,504 --> 00:11:09,337 when you're in the kitchen with a turkey in the oven 228 00:11:09,339 --> 00:11:11,339 and gravy bubbling on the stove and... 229 00:11:11,341 --> 00:11:12,373 (Gasps) 230 00:11:12,375 --> 00:11:13,741 (Clatters) 231 00:11:15,944 --> 00:11:17,879 Oh, Mother, no. 232 00:11:22,051 --> 00:11:23,651 Mother... 233 00:11:23,653 --> 00:11:25,319 where's the turkey? 234 00:11:25,321 --> 00:11:26,521 Where's the bubbling gravy? 235 00:11:26,523 --> 00:11:27,889 Why... why aren't you cooking? 236 00:11:27,891 --> 00:11:30,692 What's going on? (Laughs nervously) 237 00:11:31,860 --> 00:11:34,929 I hate to pull the curtain off your childhood innocence, but... 238 00:11:36,298 --> 00:11:39,634 Momma's famous Christmas Eve dinner... 239 00:11:39,636 --> 00:11:40,702 isn't real. 240 00:11:45,708 --> 00:11:48,876 Oh, the deli is not answering! 241 00:11:48,878 --> 00:11:50,745 The message says that they closed early for Christmas. 242 00:11:50,776 --> 00:11:51,212 (Beep) 243 00:11:51,214 --> 00:11:53,748 Yeah, well, they probably went home to make dinner for their families, 244 00:11:53,750 --> 00:11:56,017 unlike you, you holiday hoodwinker! 245 00:11:56,019 --> 00:11:59,053 Liv, I am sorry. 246 00:11:59,055 --> 00:12:01,155 There are just so many things to do 247 00:12:01,157 --> 00:12:04,225 this time of year, that I... I always order dinner 248 00:12:04,227 --> 00:12:06,594 and pretend to cook when I'm actually wrapping presents 249 00:12:06,596 --> 00:12:08,763 and... and writing the family newsletter. 250 00:12:08,765 --> 00:12:13,434 Mom, but my crew is coming over for Momma's famous Christmas Eve dinner, 251 00:12:13,436 --> 00:12:16,104 and we don't have any food and we don't have any time 252 00:12:16,106 --> 00:12:17,572 and all the stores are closed. 253 00:12:17,574 --> 00:12:19,107 I mean, what are we gonna do, Momma? 254 00:12:19,109 --> 00:12:19,689 Oh. 255 00:12:19,720 --> 00:12:22,009 Oh, if only there were someone who knew their way 256 00:12:22,011 --> 00:12:23,945 around a kitchen who would do anything for you. 257 00:12:25,380 --> 00:12:26,447 (Gasps) 258 00:12:27,783 --> 00:12:30,084 - Artie! - No! 259 00:12:30,086 --> 00:12:33,121 - Yes! - Wha... 260 00:12:33,123 --> 00:12:35,022 Bah humbug! 261 00:12:37,025 --> 00:12:39,360 - (Trumpets play) - Joy to the world 262 00:12:39,362 --> 00:12:41,596 Artie has come 263 00:12:41,598 --> 00:12:47,135 Let Liv receive her king! 264 00:12:49,905 --> 00:12:52,140 Ho, ho, ho! 265 00:12:52,142 --> 00:12:54,942 Merry Christmas! 266 00:12:56,645 --> 00:12:58,112 All right. 267 00:13:00,582 --> 00:13:01,883 So, the coal... 268 00:13:01,885 --> 00:13:03,671 is in one of those presents. 269 00:13:03,702 --> 00:13:04,819 (Willow sighs) 270 00:13:04,821 --> 00:13:06,087 What do we do? 271 00:13:06,089 --> 00:13:08,122 We're gonna do what any good elf would do. 272 00:13:08,124 --> 00:13:10,825 We go out there and we take presents away from children! 273 00:13:15,030 --> 00:13:16,631 We need your present! (Laughs nervously) 274 00:13:16,633 --> 00:13:19,534 It's official elf business! 275 00:13:22,137 --> 00:13:23,971 Oh, no coal. 276 00:13:23,973 --> 00:13:26,207 Remote control car. Beat it. 277 00:13:27,309 --> 00:13:29,911 Ho, ho, hold it right there! 278 00:13:29,913 --> 00:13:33,581 All right, let's take a trip over to Santa's workshop, where the... 279 00:13:33,583 --> 00:13:37,652 What in the name of Rudolph's rosy red nose is going on here?! 280 00:13:39,021 --> 00:13:43,224 Are you stealing presents from children?! 281 00:13:44,326 --> 00:13:47,028 Santa gave me coal! (Cries) 282 00:13:50,599 --> 00:13:53,134 I didn't give anybody coal! 283 00:13:53,136 --> 00:13:56,037 Maddie: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, it wasn't... that wasn't... 284 00:13:56,039 --> 00:13:58,039 Hi. That wasn't Santa, right? 285 00:13:58,041 --> 00:14:00,007 Because, I mean, Santa would never do that! 286 00:14:00,009 --> 00:14:03,845 That... it was... um... uh... 287 00:14:04,780 --> 00:14:06,848 - It was me. - (Gasps) 288 00:14:06,850 --> 00:14:08,349 You heard it here first! 289 00:14:08,351 --> 00:14:10,284 Maddie Rooney has ruined Christmas! 290 00:14:10,286 --> 00:14:12,086 I... 291 00:14:15,490 --> 00:14:19,093 Minions, show me what you found in the Rooney cupboards. 292 00:14:22,297 --> 00:14:26,100 Eight cans of yellow wax beans and a bag of oyster crackers? 293 00:14:28,203 --> 00:14:30,137 For shame, Mrs. Rooney! 294 00:14:30,139 --> 00:14:31,239 (Clicks) 295 00:14:31,241 --> 00:14:33,708 Holiday newsletter. No time to listen. 296 00:14:33,710 --> 00:14:35,476 Liv, when did they offer you Voltage? 297 00:14:35,478 --> 00:14:37,178 Was it September or August? 298 00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:40,581 And when did I buy that dead guy suit that turned Joey cool for a day? 299 00:14:45,053 --> 00:14:48,923 So, Artie, do you think that you could pull off Christmas Eve dinner? 300 00:14:48,925 --> 00:14:53,327 Well, this is a tall order and I'm a short man... 301 00:14:55,230 --> 00:14:59,133 but there is one thing that would put a lift in my shoes... 302 00:15:00,535 --> 00:15:03,905 a holiday card picture with you on my arm. 303 00:15:05,240 --> 00:15:10,511 We can look back on it fondly years from now... when we're married. 304 00:15:11,580 --> 00:15:12,780 Fine. 305 00:15:12,782 --> 00:15:15,116 - She said yes! - No, no, no, no, no, no. 306 00:15:15,118 --> 00:15:19,086 To the... to the one... the one photo. Not the... not the marriage. 307 00:15:19,088 --> 00:15:22,089 Well, I have a holiday miracle to make. 308 00:15:22,091 --> 00:15:23,157 Taylor Minion. 309 00:15:24,293 --> 00:15:27,295 Go to my root cellar and get me everything we don't need for New Year's Eve. 310 00:15:27,297 --> 00:15:29,463 Joel Minion. 311 00:15:29,465 --> 00:15:33,634 Fetch me the finest turkey in Stevens Point. 312 00:15:33,636 --> 00:15:35,436 Other one. 313 00:15:35,438 --> 00:15:37,171 Nudge Liv a little closer. 314 00:15:41,043 --> 00:15:45,446 Hark, the herald angels sing 315 00:15:45,448 --> 00:15:49,717 Liv and Artie gonna do this thing! 316 00:15:53,555 --> 00:15:54,956 (Doorbell) 317 00:15:59,227 --> 00:16:01,095 Merry Christmas, Liv's brother! 318 00:16:01,097 --> 00:16:03,130 Season's greetings, Liv's director! 319 00:16:03,132 --> 00:16:04,432 (Both chuckle) 320 00:16:04,434 --> 00:16:08,069 Oh, you guys are in for such a treat! 321 00:16:09,638 --> 00:16:17,078 I just cashed in a coupon for "Parker's Christmas Candy Cane Cavalcade"! 322 00:16:18,180 --> 00:16:23,217 I have no idea what you're taking about, but I am in. 323 00:16:24,186 --> 00:16:25,319 Parker! 324 00:16:26,822 --> 00:16:28,155 It's showtime. 325 00:16:31,426 --> 00:16:33,160 (Jazz holiday music plays) 326 00:16:50,345 --> 00:16:51,379 (Doorbell) 327 00:16:51,381 --> 00:16:52,780 Oh. Huh. 328 00:16:52,782 --> 00:16:55,683 Well, who could that be? 329 00:16:58,320 --> 00:16:59,387 (Gasps) 330 00:17:01,823 --> 00:17:03,124 What?! 331 00:17:03,126 --> 00:17:09,330 I invited the girls from your class to come watch you dance whilst dressed 332 00:17:09,332 --> 00:17:11,265 like a cute, little candy cane! 333 00:17:12,334 --> 00:17:13,401 (Giggling) 334 00:17:13,403 --> 00:17:14,735 Joey! 335 00:17:14,737 --> 00:17:19,373 I am not dancing in front of Kristin Alvez! 336 00:17:19,375 --> 00:17:20,541 Hey, Kristin. 337 00:17:22,210 --> 00:17:25,112 Nothing under that tree is worth humiliating myself. 338 00:17:32,220 --> 00:17:34,555 (Crying) 339 00:17:34,557 --> 00:17:39,593 Hey, little girl... don't be sad. 340 00:17:39,595 --> 00:17:42,296 But Santa gave me coal. 341 00:17:43,698 --> 00:17:46,200 Um... you know what? 342 00:17:46,202 --> 00:17:48,169 Actually, can I take a look at this? 343 00:17:49,671 --> 00:17:51,772 Uh-huh... oh. 344 00:17:51,774 --> 00:17:53,207 Wow. 345 00:17:53,209 --> 00:17:55,209 Just as I suspected. 346 00:17:55,211 --> 00:17:57,211 This is not actually coal. 347 00:17:57,213 --> 00:17:59,880 This is the... 348 00:17:59,882 --> 00:18:03,017 merry magic... 349 00:18:03,019 --> 00:18:04,518 - Christmas rock! - (Gasps) 350 00:18:07,022 --> 00:18:08,289 What's that? 351 00:18:08,291 --> 00:18:10,191 (Chuckles) What's that? 352 00:18:10,193 --> 00:18:13,360 Obviously, it means you win a prize. 353 00:18:14,362 --> 00:18:15,696 Yeah. 354 00:18:15,698 --> 00:18:17,731 The biggest prize of all! 355 00:18:17,733 --> 00:18:19,733 A prize? 356 00:18:19,735 --> 00:18:21,335 What prize? 357 00:18:22,571 --> 00:18:24,872 Both: Um... 358 00:18:26,274 --> 00:18:27,541 - It, uh, you... - Um... 359 00:18:27,543 --> 00:18:28,809 you win a... 360 00:18:28,811 --> 00:18:30,277 - um... - You, um... 361 00:18:30,279 --> 00:18:31,345 Both: Santa? 362 00:18:32,948 --> 00:18:39,453 Oh. Uh... uh... You get to do the weather with Johnny Nimbus! 363 00:18:40,789 --> 00:18:42,123 Yay! 364 00:18:42,125 --> 00:18:44,492 I'm gonna make it sunny all week! 365 00:18:44,494 --> 00:18:46,594 (Chuckles) Go ahead, kid. 366 00:18:46,596 --> 00:18:48,162 I make it up all the time. 367 00:18:49,731 --> 00:18:52,500 Hello, Stevens Point! 368 00:18:52,502 --> 00:18:55,302 This is your ol' pal, Raina, with the weather. 369 00:18:58,940 --> 00:19:01,775 Hey, girls, can you hold down the throne for a minute? 370 00:19:01,777 --> 00:19:04,111 Santa sees some cookies with his name on it. 371 00:19:04,113 --> 00:19:05,846 Yeah. Hey, save some room 372 00:19:05,848 --> 00:19:08,816 - for Momma's famous Christmas Eve dinner! - (Sighs) 373 00:19:08,818 --> 00:19:11,585 Ah, dinner with family and friends. 374 00:19:11,587 --> 00:19:14,321 That sounds a whole lot better than reheating a burrito 375 00:19:14,323 --> 00:19:17,258 and acting surprised when you open a present you gave to yourself. 376 00:19:18,493 --> 00:19:21,428 Well, Johnny, why don't you come to my house for dinner? 377 00:19:21,430 --> 00:19:24,298 I mean, my mom always makes the most amazing meal. 378 00:19:24,300 --> 00:19:26,367 You'd do that for me? 379 00:19:26,369 --> 00:19:27,801 Yeah. I mean... 380 00:19:27,803 --> 00:19:29,103 I mean, it's Christmas, right? 381 00:19:29,105 --> 00:19:32,439 Oh, and Johnny, I got you a little somethin'. 382 00:19:32,441 --> 00:19:35,442 Oh, you elves are gonna make me cry. 383 00:19:36,811 --> 00:19:38,812 This is too much. Really, I... (Gasps) 384 00:19:38,814 --> 00:19:40,181 (Giggles) 385 00:19:41,349 --> 00:19:42,416 Coal?! 386 00:19:43,451 --> 00:19:45,386 I'm already in an emotional state! 387 00:19:45,388 --> 00:19:47,454 (Both laugh) 388 00:19:49,324 --> 00:19:50,691 I get it now! 389 00:19:50,693 --> 00:19:52,293 - It's hilarious! - Right?! 390 00:19:58,667 --> 00:19:59,967 (Overlapping chatter) 391 00:20:05,740 --> 00:20:08,542 Oh, you did it, Artie! 392 00:20:08,544 --> 00:20:10,544 Dinner looks amazing. 393 00:20:10,546 --> 00:20:14,381 I'll see you tomorrow for our holiday card photo shoot. 394 00:20:14,383 --> 00:20:15,549 Artie, wait. 395 00:20:22,657 --> 00:20:26,093 You really saved me today... 396 00:20:26,095 --> 00:20:30,864 and I was wondering if you might want to join 397 00:20:30,866 --> 00:20:33,267 me and my family for dinner tonight. 398 00:20:35,003 --> 00:20:36,403 Thank you, Liv. 399 00:20:36,405 --> 00:20:37,571 That means a lot. 400 00:20:38,673 --> 00:20:41,976 I'd love to, but I'm not dressed for dinner. 401 00:20:44,846 --> 00:20:46,413 And now I am! 402 00:20:50,085 --> 00:20:52,253 Minions, leave us. 403 00:20:52,255 --> 00:20:54,622 We'll do Christmas bonuses tomorrow with my family 404 00:20:54,624 --> 00:20:56,590 while opening presents in our PJs. 405 00:20:59,261 --> 00:21:01,295 (Sighs) Okay. 406 00:21:01,297 --> 00:21:03,030 Smells great, kiddies. 407 00:21:03,032 --> 00:21:05,432 Okay, now out of my way. 408 00:21:05,434 --> 00:21:07,568 I swear, I have worked so hard. 409 00:21:07,570 --> 00:21:08,636 (Chuckles) 410 00:21:10,872 --> 00:21:14,675 Here comes Momma's famous Christmas Eve dinner! 411 00:21:18,213 --> 00:21:20,247 Thanks for having us, Liv. 412 00:21:20,249 --> 00:21:21,649 Can someone please pass the gravy? 413 00:21:21,651 --> 00:21:22,783 Oh. 414 00:21:22,785 --> 00:21:25,886 I like to start with that as a base and then pile the food on top. 415 00:21:25,888 --> 00:21:28,188 Told you. I come to eat. 416 00:21:30,325 --> 00:21:34,061 - The gravy is on its way-vy. - Oh. 417 00:21:34,063 --> 00:21:36,630 Many thanks again for having me. 418 00:21:36,632 --> 00:21:38,766 Haven't had this much fun on Christmas Eve 419 00:21:38,768 --> 00:21:42,936 since I covered that torrential rainstorm in Fond du Lac. 420 00:21:42,938 --> 00:21:45,172 I used to be a storm chaser. 421 00:21:45,174 --> 00:21:46,674 Tell me everything. 422 00:21:47,776 --> 00:21:50,811 Did you just ask Johnny Nimbus to talk about the weather? 423 00:21:50,813 --> 00:21:54,481 'Cause it's 82 and sunny in Cancun, and we can be there by New Year's. 424 00:21:57,352 --> 00:21:58,686 - Muy caliente. - Oh. 425 00:22:03,658 --> 00:22:05,626 Weird. 426 00:22:05,628 --> 00:22:07,294 Anyway... 427 00:22:07,296 --> 00:22:10,297 I'm sorry I got so carried away with those coupons. 428 00:22:10,299 --> 00:22:13,167 I told Mom to give you all your presents. 429 00:22:13,169 --> 00:22:14,668 Thanks, but I get it. 430 00:22:14,670 --> 00:22:17,338 I'm too old to still be giving coupon books as gifts. 431 00:22:17,340 --> 00:22:20,040 Maybe, but I got you something to make it up to you. 432 00:22:23,011 --> 00:22:26,380 A "Free Hugs from Joey for Life" coupon? 433 00:22:26,382 --> 00:22:27,481 Thanks. 434 00:22:27,483 --> 00:22:29,850 You wanna cash it in now? 435 00:22:31,853 --> 00:22:33,687 I do. 436 00:22:33,689 --> 00:22:35,422 Merry Christmas, Willow. 437 00:22:37,726 --> 00:22:38,792 (Gasps) 438 00:22:40,295 --> 00:22:42,629 Free Joey hugs for life?! 439 00:22:42,631 --> 00:22:45,499 God bless us, everyone! 440 00:22:45,501 --> 00:22:47,735 (Sighs dreamily) 441 00:22:50,372 --> 00:22:51,705 Let's eat. 442 00:22:57,145 --> 00:22:58,712 Liv and Artie: Deck the halls 443 00:22:58,714 --> 00:23:00,848 With boughs of holly 444 00:23:00,850 --> 00:23:04,551 Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la 445 00:23:04,553 --> 00:23:08,389 'Tis the season to be jolly 446 00:23:08,391 --> 00:23:11,992 Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la 447 00:23:11,994 --> 00:23:15,696 Don we now our gay apparel 448 00:23:15,698 --> 00:23:19,333 Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la 449 00:23:19,335 --> 00:23:22,870 Troll the ancient yuletide carol 450 00:23:22,872 --> 00:23:26,673 Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la 451 00:23:28,676 --> 00:23:29,843 Pete: Christmas. 452 00:23:29,893 --> 00:23:34,443 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 32611

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