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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:16,384 --> 00:00:19,220 I haven't used one in so many years. 2 00:00:26,494 --> 00:00:29,497 Oh good... 3 00:00:44,545 --> 00:00:48,682 Perfect. A perfect forgery. 4 00:00:48,716 --> 00:00:55,689 * "My Dearest Darling" by E.J. Bocage, P Gayten 5 00:00:55,723 --> 00:01:00,728 * All I need 6 00:01:01,395 --> 00:01:06,400 * is someone like you, 7 00:01:08,469 --> 00:01:12,473 * my dearest darling, 8 00:01:15,243 --> 00:01:19,247 * please love me too. 9 00:01:22,450 --> 00:01:26,454 * Within my heart, 10 00:01:29,390 --> 00:01:36,197 * I pray your answer's yes. 11 00:01:36,230 --> 00:01:41,235 * I'll make your life 12 00:01:41,902 --> 00:01:47,107 full of happiness. * 13 00:01:48,709 --> 00:01:51,745 Hi. I'm Candy Darling. 14 00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:56,350 I'm an actress here in New York. 15 00:01:56,384 --> 00:01:59,520 I've been in eight pictures. 16 00:01:59,553 --> 00:02:04,392 Small parts in big pictures and big parts in small pictures. 17 00:02:04,425 --> 00:02:06,594 We're doing a picture together. Candy Darling. 18 00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:10,498 Well, we're calling it "Blonde on a Bum Trip." 19 00:02:10,531 --> 00:02:13,267 Jane Fonda is going to be in Warhol's next movie 20 00:02:13,301 --> 00:02:16,270 - at least she thought so. Warhol did not. 21 00:02:16,304 --> 00:02:18,539 I hope! 22 00:02:18,572 --> 00:02:23,377 Who is certainly going to be in it is Warhol's newly discovered star: Candy. 23 00:02:23,411 --> 00:02:28,649 I call myself Candy Warhol now. (laughter) 24 00:02:28,682 --> 00:02:30,584 Cash me in! 25 00:02:32,786 --> 00:02:37,425 I was with my father and my uncle. I had done a reading. 26 00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:41,629 And they came to see it. And Candy was there. 27 00:02:41,662 --> 00:02:46,667 They became very courtly with her: she demanded that. 28 00:02:46,700 --> 00:02:52,473 I remember when she left, my uncle and my father stood up, 29 00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:54,808 and I'd never seen them do that before. 30 00:02:54,842 --> 00:02:57,511 Everybody had left the theater, it was 3 or 4 o'clock, 31 00:02:57,545 --> 00:03:01,415 and it was the two of us, and we spent like an hour there. 32 00:03:01,449 --> 00:03:03,817 But I remember this pasty white makeup that was kind of coming off, 33 00:03:03,851 --> 00:03:08,489 and underneath it I could see a beard, and, um... 34 00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:09,723 I said to them, I said, well, 35 00:03:09,757 --> 00:03:14,828 now I don't know if she is a transsexual or a transvestite, 36 00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:19,633 I said, but this is not a woman that was born a woman, like when she was born 37 00:03:19,667 --> 00:03:23,537 the doctor slapped her on the backside and said "it's a girl". 38 00:03:23,571 --> 00:03:27,841 And they went "what?", I mean, they both, like, ... 39 00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:30,711 Probably shouldn't say this, but I went out on the sidewalk afterward, 40 00:03:30,744 --> 00:03:32,980 and something about the division of the sexes, 41 00:03:33,013 --> 00:03:37,651 or something that must have gone back to my childhood, I threw up on the sidewalk. 42 00:03:37,685 --> 00:03:39,853 And after they recovered there for a few seconds, 43 00:03:39,887 --> 00:03:43,857 I remember my father taking a gulp of his beer, a couple big gulps, 44 00:03:43,891 --> 00:03:49,830 he said, "Well," he said, "God bless her, she certainly pulled it off." 45 00:03:49,863 --> 00:03:55,536 "WALK ON THE WILD SIDE" by Lou Reed* Candy came from out on the Island. 46 00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:59,640 In the back room, she was everybody's darling. 47 00:03:59,673 --> 00:04:03,911 But she never lost her head, even when she was giving head, 48 00:04:03,944 --> 00:04:11,485 she says Hey babe, take a walk on the wild side, hey babe take a walk...* 49 00:04:11,519 --> 00:04:13,421 I was in Max's, and she told me 50 00:04:13,454 --> 00:04:16,790 that Lou Reed had written a song about her. 51 00:04:16,824 --> 00:04:22,763 And I said, "In a pig's ass Lou Reed wrote a song about you!" 52 00:04:22,796 --> 00:04:25,899 And she said, "OK, Mr. Wise Guy, I'll show you," 53 00:04:25,933 --> 00:04:32,039 and she walked over to the jukebox and put on "Walk On the Wild Side". 54 00:04:32,072 --> 00:04:35,543 I was totally amazed. 55 00:04:38,846 --> 00:04:44,452 I made the, uh, transfer last night. I moved the ashes from, um, the urn... 56 00:04:44,485 --> 00:04:47,655 I just wanted to show this, 'cause... 57 00:04:47,688 --> 00:04:51,892 I don't know if I can get it out without much problem... 58 00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:57,531 um, this picture, little picture, meant so much to Candy. 59 00:04:57,565 --> 00:05:04,772 It could be Germany, it could be anywhere, it's, uh, sort of a dark church and a road, 60 00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:08,809 and Candy, when we lived together, always wanted it, you know. She really... 61 00:05:08,842 --> 00:05:11,779 And I liked it, I kept it, I said I don't want to give it to you. 62 00:05:11,812 --> 00:05:14,782 But when she was sick, I gave it to her. 63 00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:18,886 And she said that was her favorite possession. 64 00:05:18,919 --> 00:05:22,089 And I believe it, 'cause she really liked it for some reason. 65 00:05:22,122 --> 00:05:28,095 And she used to say, "Well, we'll both meet by the church and continue on this road." 66 00:05:28,128 --> 00:05:30,564 So, she's getting it. 67 00:05:30,598 --> 00:05:33,534 All right, let's take down the picture, Jeremiah! 68 00:05:33,567 --> 00:05:35,836 This is my life. 69 00:05:39,006 --> 00:05:41,709 Get her down, she's getting out! 70 00:05:41,742 --> 00:05:44,912 Get her out of here! We don't need her in this theater anymore! 71 00:05:44,945 --> 00:05:48,749 Get a close-up of this! Who is it, who is it? 72 00:05:48,782 --> 00:05:53,921 This is a piece of the dress that she wore when she was buried, 73 00:05:53,954 --> 00:05:58,592 and in it is her hair. 74 00:05:58,626 --> 00:06:04,565 The cat is interested in this. See. 75 00:06:04,598 --> 00:06:10,804 This is her hair, when she was healthy, and it's still very full and, you know... 76 00:06:10,838 --> 00:06:13,073 Uh-uh, get down... 77 00:06:13,106 --> 00:06:18,646 All right, well, she is taking all these things with her on her travels, 78 00:06:18,679 --> 00:06:21,782 and I wish her the very best. 79 00:06:21,815 --> 00:06:27,755 And when I was a child, I used to fill up the bathtub, 80 00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:34,995 and put blue food coloring in the bathtub to make the water blue, like in Technicolor. 81 00:06:35,028 --> 00:06:41,902 And a few years later, I discovered, uh, Kim Novak, in "The Eddie Duchin Story", 82 00:06:41,935 --> 00:06:46,440 and I was always attracted to women with white hair. 83 00:06:46,474 --> 00:06:49,409 I thought it was the prettiest. 84 00:06:51,779 --> 00:06:54,815 I remember Candy once told me that when she was very young, 85 00:06:54,848 --> 00:07:00,053 she sent away for an autographed photo of Kim Novak. 86 00:07:00,087 --> 00:07:05,959 When the mailman finally delivered that envelope, and she opened it up, 87 00:07:05,993 --> 00:07:11,732 and she saw the photo of Kim Novak, and it said 88 00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:17,771 "To James, love, Kim Novak", or something like that, 89 00:07:17,805 --> 00:07:22,810 she said that she couldn't stop looking at the photo... 90 00:07:25,112 --> 00:07:29,883 ...for the entire day. 91 00:07:29,917 --> 00:07:35,022 And she told me this story very, very seriously. 92 00:07:35,055 --> 00:07:40,894 It was apparent that it was one of the most important moments in her life. 93 00:07:40,928 --> 00:07:48,001 I had to understand, from that point on, that to be a movie star, 94 00:07:48,035 --> 00:07:53,807 to be considered a beautiful woman, to be considered a beautiful movie star, 95 00:07:53,841 --> 00:07:58,912 was the most important thing in Candy's life. 96 00:07:58,946 --> 00:08:05,853 She idolized women who had achieved this, and this is what she wanted to be. 97 00:08:05,886 --> 00:08:09,757 This was the most important thing in her life, this is why she was alive. 98 00:08:09,790 --> 00:08:10,891 [KIM NOVAK, IN "PICNIC", You know, some boys, 99 00:08:10,924 --> 00:08:13,594 well when they take a girl in their arms to dance, 100 00:08:13,627 --> 00:08:15,295 Some boys when they take a girl in their arms to dance 101 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:16,864 well they make you feel sort of uncomfortable. 102 00:08:16,897 --> 00:08:19,099 you feel sort of uncomfortable 103 00:08:19,132 --> 00:08:20,534 But with you, 104 00:08:20,568 --> 00:08:22,235 But with you I had the feeling 105 00:08:22,269 --> 00:08:25,606 that you knew exactly what you were doing, 106 00:08:25,639 --> 00:08:28,776 and I could follow you every step of the way. 107 00:08:30,310 --> 00:08:35,082 Did you see "Picnic?" You know when she said that to William Holden? 108 00:08:35,115 --> 00:08:35,949 Kim was my favorite star, 109 00:08:35,983 --> 00:08:38,051 I went nuts over her when she came out. 110 00:08:38,085 --> 00:08:39,152 - I know 111 00:08:39,186 --> 00:08:42,556 You know, she was so strong, that's why I liked her. 112 00:08:42,590 --> 00:08:49,930 There was something stable about Kim, something so strong and... 113 00:08:49,963 --> 00:08:52,165 Joan Crawford had that, and Barbara Stanwyck, 114 00:08:52,199 --> 00:08:55,035 we were talking about that before you came in, they had that very strong thing... 115 00:08:55,068 --> 00:08:57,304 Oh, but Kim, Kim was also vulnerable... 116 00:08:57,337 --> 00:09:00,908 - I understand that Kim... 117 00:09:00,941 --> 00:09:03,677 and I liked Kim's looks. 118 00:09:03,711 --> 00:09:09,316 Her model was something at least one, probably two, generations previous. 119 00:09:09,349 --> 00:09:12,986 That comes from, you know, I guess, watching television. 120 00:09:13,020 --> 00:09:17,925 Or, you know, looking at movie magazines, or, living in someone else's past, 121 00:09:17,958 --> 00:09:21,662 not even her own past. You know? So it was all a fantasy. 122 00:09:21,695 --> 00:09:25,933 No, she didn't live in the past. She was a humorist. 123 00:09:25,966 --> 00:09:30,103 She and her particular type of humor, had to do with 124 00:09:30,137 --> 00:09:35,142 making fun, a little bit, of film stars of the past. 125 00:09:35,175 --> 00:09:37,177 I don't need you... 126 00:09:42,049 --> 00:09:46,119 I don't need you! 127 00:09:46,153 --> 00:09:50,691 I don't need anyone! 128 00:09:50,724 --> 00:09:54,728 I'm Jeanne Eagels! 129 00:09:57,397 --> 00:10:01,201 That's Jeanne Eagels (laughter) 130 00:10:01,234 --> 00:10:03,270 I remember going to the Cedar Tavern with her once, 131 00:10:03,303 --> 00:10:07,374 and she was playing out the scene from Jeanne Eagels jumping off the fire escape. 132 00:10:07,407 --> 00:10:14,114 You know, there was a lot of dying as the young, beautiful star. 133 00:10:14,147 --> 00:10:18,318 She lived that out, it's very odd. 134 00:10:37,337 --> 00:10:42,042 Yeah, I want to arrange for a burial on Saturday. 135 00:10:42,075 --> 00:10:48,415 Uh, two people, my mom, and a person named Candy Darling, who was an actress, 136 00:10:48,448 --> 00:10:52,686 and my mother's name was Katherine Newton. 137 00:10:52,720 --> 00:10:57,725 And they died in 1974 and 1989, they were cremated. 138 00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:05,065 And when I di-- When she died, and I saw her lying in the coffin, 139 00:11:05,098 --> 00:11:09,169 it was almost as if I saw myself lying in the coffin. 140 00:11:09,202 --> 00:11:16,343 This horrible scream went through my body, and people really wrote me off afterwards, 141 00:11:16,376 --> 00:11:19,880 afterwards they thought, "well, you remind us so much of Candy, 142 00:11:19,913 --> 00:11:21,348 we really don't want you around." 143 00:11:27,821 --> 00:11:29,857 I wish she was here, but she's not. 144 00:11:29,890 --> 00:11:32,225 There's nothing I can do about it, nothing. 145 00:11:32,259 --> 00:11:36,063 I can't mix a potion, I can't stand on my head in Times Square, 146 00:11:36,096 --> 00:11:39,066 I can't do anything. It's over. 147 00:11:43,503 --> 00:11:47,174 When you're in your 30's and 40's, you don't think about death. 148 00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:50,110 It only comes later, it creeps up at you at night. 149 00:11:50,143 --> 00:11:56,149 The little voice says, "Well, you know, Jeremiah, where are you going to go when you die?" 150 00:12:07,995 --> 00:12:09,462 Honey, come on! 151 00:12:09,997 --> 00:12:12,332 I'm not answering the door, Lance! 152 00:12:12,365 --> 00:12:13,967 You open that fucking door, 153 00:12:14,001 --> 00:12:15,502 I'll kick your fucking face in! 154 00:12:15,535 --> 00:12:16,970 I'll answer it. 155 00:12:17,004 --> 00:12:18,038 NO! 156 00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:21,842 Come on! 157 00:12:21,875 --> 00:12:26,379 Hi, honey! Hi, honey! 158 00:12:26,413 --> 00:12:31,484 What the fuck is going on in here? 159 00:12:31,518 --> 00:12:34,788 * One, two testing one, two, 160 00:12:34,822 --> 00:12:40,794 And the date is October 15th, 1974 161 00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:50,971 I first met Candy on a street called Greenwich Avenue. 162 00:12:51,004 --> 00:12:57,010 I must have been about 15 years old. I was frightened of her. 163 00:12:57,044 --> 00:13:00,280 I didn't know whether she wanted me sexually... 164 00:13:00,313 --> 00:13:03,984 She told me to call her, and I called her and told her she couldn't stay with me, 165 00:13:04,017 --> 00:13:06,286 and she was very, very disappointed, 166 00:13:06,319 --> 00:13:09,289 because she was desperate to get out from where she was living. 167 00:13:09,322 --> 00:13:17,030 Oh, no! Oh, Lance! Please! That's all there is! 168 00:13:17,064 --> 00:13:19,532 You fucking cheap slut! 169 00:13:19,566 --> 00:13:21,935 I was living in Flushing, on a quiet little street, 170 00:13:21,969 --> 00:13:24,905 and the next-door neighbors would have talked. 171 00:13:24,938 --> 00:13:28,308 I didn't want them to think that I was living with some sort of drag queen. 172 00:13:28,341 --> 00:13:31,879 Stop it! 173 00:13:31,912 --> 00:13:35,916 Her personality was just so strong. I wasn't ready for her. 174 00:13:35,949 --> 00:13:42,289 (loud thump) Good riddance to bad rubbish. 175 00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:47,961 But, when I got my apartment in Manhattan, we were best friends, all of a sudden. 176 00:13:47,995 --> 00:13:51,564 We became really close friends. You know, it was like a book opened. 177 00:13:55,635 --> 00:13:58,906 Meet Andy Warhol. 178 00:13:58,939 --> 00:14:02,109 Oh really? Oh. 179 00:14:02,142 --> 00:14:10,017 "Andy Warhol" by David Bowie * Andy walking, Andy Tired, Andy take a little snooze 180 00:14:10,050 --> 00:14:17,057 Tie him up when he's fast asleep, Send him on a pleasant cruise 181 00:14:19,226 --> 00:14:25,065 When he wakes up on the sea. Be sure to think of me and you 182 00:14:25,098 --> 00:14:31,071 He'll think about paint and he'll think about glue. What a jolly boring thing to do * 183 00:14:31,104 --> 00:14:34,908 Andy came into a luncheonette where I was working as a waitress. 184 00:14:34,942 --> 00:14:40,213 And he came over to me and said "You should be in movies". (laughter) 185 00:14:40,247 --> 00:14:46,253 * Andy Warhol looks a scream, hang him on my wall. 186 00:14:46,286 --> 00:14:52,425 Andy Warhol, Silver Screen, Can't tell them apart at all* 187 00:14:54,061 --> 00:14:56,529 Andy, why is it you're making these films? 188 00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:59,666 Um, well, it's just easier to do. 189 00:14:59,699 --> 00:15:03,270 It's easier to do than, um, painting. 190 00:15:03,303 --> 00:15:08,675 Normal films, the burden is more on the director. 191 00:15:11,444 --> 00:15:13,146 And, I mean, if you're doing 192 00:15:13,180 --> 00:15:14,447 a scene, and you can't, 193 00:15:14,481 --> 00:15:16,149 if you don't feel well that day, 194 00:15:16,183 --> 00:15:21,654 or you can't think of anything to say, it's just too bad. 195 00:15:21,688 --> 00:15:24,557 You know, maybe you won't do another scene. 196 00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:27,194 Candy wanted to be a movie star. 197 00:15:27,227 --> 00:15:31,164 Candy was a man who wanted to be a female movie star. 198 00:15:31,198 --> 00:15:36,003 And, you know, fell into the clutches of Andy, who told her she was. 199 00:15:36,036 --> 00:15:39,072 And she thought that she was discovered, by Andy Warhol, 200 00:15:39,106 --> 00:15:45,612 you know, the new, the biggest, uh, the MGM of the East Coast, 201 00:15:45,645 --> 00:15:48,982 that he was going to really make her the next 202 00:15:49,016 --> 00:15:52,319 Jean Harlow, Lana Turner, Marilyn Monroe, all rolled into one, 203 00:15:52,352 --> 00:15:57,090 and she would be the biggest movie star on the planet. 204 00:15:57,124 --> 00:15:59,092 Tell us about the film, what's the film about? 205 00:15:59,126 --> 00:16:02,095 Uh, it's called "Blonde on a Bum Trip." What's it about? Candy? 206 00:16:02,129 --> 00:16:03,630 Islam! 207 00:16:03,663 --> 00:16:09,569 It's about, um, a naive young lady... 208 00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:13,240 who goes to Hollywood to make it big. 209 00:16:13,273 --> 00:16:15,708 And the thing about Candy that was kind of curious, in that 210 00:16:15,742 --> 00:16:20,447 here she was in the middle of this very avant-garde scene, of Andy Warhol's factory 211 00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:26,219 and underground film-making, and Pop Art, and she really was a throwback, you know, 212 00:16:26,253 --> 00:16:30,357 she was someone who wished the studio system still existed, 213 00:16:30,390 --> 00:16:35,528 and sort of saw Andy as Louis B. Mayer, except Andy, in some ways, was, 214 00:16:35,562 --> 00:16:38,398 but he didn't have the resources of a Louis B. Mayer. 215 00:16:38,431 --> 00:16:43,236 And she wanted to be Kim Novak, she wanted to be kind of the queen of the studio. 216 00:16:43,270 --> 00:16:49,276 *Oh yes we do, we love you Andy, and we'll be true... 217 00:16:49,309 --> 00:16:57,317 When you're not near to us, we're blue, Oh, Andy, we love you.* 218 00:16:57,784 --> 00:17:01,321 I think Candy was very avant-garde, 219 00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:06,393 in terms of who she was and how she invented herself. 220 00:17:06,426 --> 00:17:11,398 In terms of making comparisons between Andy's Superstars, I mean, 221 00:17:11,431 --> 00:17:14,767 there was nothing fragile about Candy, she was just a very potent, 222 00:17:14,801 --> 00:17:20,507 very confident, very powerful presence in a way. 223 00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:27,814 I had Limburger cheese and bagels for breakfast; garlic dressing for lunch; 224 00:17:27,847 --> 00:17:32,319 steak and onions for dinner; but you'll never know. 225 00:17:32,352 --> 00:17:40,360 Because I'll always stay "Kissing Sweet", the new "dazzle dental" way. 226 00:17:40,460 --> 00:17:42,395 Cut! 227 00:17:42,429 --> 00:17:44,464 Nico was the silent type, 228 00:17:44,497 --> 00:17:49,269 so you really were engaged with Nico on the level of the way she looked, 229 00:17:49,302 --> 00:17:52,305 which was very dynamic in its own way. 230 00:17:52,339 --> 00:17:55,575 I think Edie was maybe trying too hard, on a certain level, 231 00:17:55,608 --> 00:18:01,348 to assume a certain role or a certain stance, in terms of taking herself seriously. 232 00:18:01,381 --> 00:18:05,418 But I think Edie was searching, more, for the kind of identity 233 00:18:05,452 --> 00:18:07,254 that Candy had already arrived at. 234 00:18:08,855 --> 00:18:12,492 I think a lot of artists, their greatest work is themselves, 235 00:18:12,525 --> 00:18:16,763 I think Andy is in that category as well, and Candy was an artist, 236 00:18:16,796 --> 00:18:21,501 and her - she was her own artwork. 237 00:18:21,534 --> 00:18:24,837 Feel pretty good about being shown here at the Whitney Museum? 238 00:18:24,871 --> 00:18:28,408 Uh, oh, I don't know... Candy, what do you think? 239 00:18:28,441 --> 00:18:29,542 Well it's good... 240 00:18:29,576 --> 00:18:31,511 This is the first time Candy's been to a museum. 241 00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:34,914 Oh, is it? You've never been to a museum before? 242 00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:39,886 Um, maybe when I was, um, in school, but I live only across the street, 243 00:18:39,919 --> 00:18:41,721 so I can come here all the time. 244 00:18:44,857 --> 00:18:47,927 What do you think of the exhibit? 245 00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:53,833 Well, I think it's, uh, colorful, and, uh, it's so... it's all right... 246 00:18:53,866 --> 00:18:55,335 There's a lot of room here. 247 00:18:55,368 --> 00:18:58,838 I think that's more the part where Andy liked Candy, 248 00:18:58,871 --> 00:19:01,641 the fact it's a person playing the part of being themselves, 249 00:19:01,674 --> 00:19:07,747 it's a weird dichotomy, it's: they're real, but they're not real. 250 00:19:10,350 --> 00:19:15,955 I was in Toronto, Canada, on a publicity tour with Andy. It was so exciting. 251 00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:20,960 Did you see my picture in Photoplay? What? You didn't know? 252 00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:28,668 Yes my dear: your famous cousin has finally made page 5 of the January issue of our old bible. 253 00:19:28,701 --> 00:19:31,638 Remember how we used to pore over those fan magazines? 254 00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:35,442 Drooling over Liz and Kim, hating Debbie? 255 00:19:35,475 --> 00:19:40,980 Well, now they can drool over me, because I'm famous, and I'm beautiful. 256 00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:43,883 (In my 82 pounds of makeup.) 257 00:19:45,918 --> 00:19:49,989 Candy could be embarrassed. Candy got ashamed about things. 258 00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:53,593 Candy, he liked people who had a sense of shame. 259 00:19:53,626 --> 00:19:57,497 It's funny to say, but it was like, Jean Michel Basquiat was the same way, 260 00:19:57,530 --> 00:20:01,468 he would turn red, you know. And Andy, it touched him, 261 00:20:01,501 --> 00:20:03,035 because Andy was the same way. 262 00:20:03,069 --> 00:20:07,540 Andy was older than Candy, quite a bit, I would imagine, 263 00:20:07,574 --> 00:20:12,645 and Andy was obviously much more successful than Candy, um, 264 00:20:12,679 --> 00:20:17,584 but probably, just being gay anytime before five minutes ago, 265 00:20:17,617 --> 00:20:23,323 everyone had the same childhood, which was: Escape. And which was: Dream. 266 00:20:23,356 --> 00:20:26,025 Your real prospects: not fabulous. 267 00:20:26,058 --> 00:20:28,561 "Pink Shoe Laces" by Mickie Grant 268 00:20:28,595 --> 00:20:34,000 * Tan shoes and pink shoelaces. A polkadot vest and man O man. 269 00:20:34,033 --> 00:20:39,939 Tan shoes and pink shoelaces and a big Panama, with a purple hat band * 270 00:20:39,972 --> 00:20:44,010 She grew up very near where I grew up, in a town called Massapequa, 271 00:20:44,043 --> 00:20:47,747 in eastern Nassau County, and I grew up in Plainview, 272 00:20:47,780 --> 00:20:52,719 and these were towns that were sort of built on potato fields in the mid-1950's. 273 00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:54,754 It was very flat. 274 00:20:54,787 --> 00:20:58,858 They built these developments with all ranch houses, or all Cape Cods, 275 00:20:58,891 --> 00:21:04,030 or all split-levels, and everybody came from Brooklyn or the Bronx. 276 00:21:04,063 --> 00:21:06,433 These communities were, like, uniformly middle-class, 277 00:21:06,466 --> 00:21:09,035 they were very uniform in so many ways. 278 00:21:09,068 --> 00:21:12,038 And all the public schools were completely new, everything was completely new: 279 00:21:12,071 --> 00:21:14,774 the churches were new, the shopping centers were new, 280 00:21:14,807 --> 00:21:18,311 and it was all very sterile in a way. 281 00:21:18,345 --> 00:21:22,349 Uniformity was really prized in these communities. 282 00:21:22,382 --> 00:21:26,386 * ...and a big Panama with a purple hat band...* 283 00:21:33,059 --> 00:21:40,800 It's evening now. I'm home and I'm very tired. Thinking all day about Candy. 284 00:21:40,833 --> 00:21:48,074 Terry showed me some pictures of Candy, when Candy was 14 or so. 285 00:21:48,107 --> 00:21:53,513 Candy looked so incredibly adorable, and sexy, for a little boy. 286 00:21:53,546 --> 00:21:56,816 Candy always had very good legs. 287 00:21:56,849 --> 00:22:01,454 I can picture her as a little boy, showing her legs off to the best advantage, 288 00:22:01,488 --> 00:22:06,325 sneakers and heavy white socks, and her long legs. 289 00:22:08,928 --> 00:22:13,500 She told me how abusive her father had been to her, 290 00:22:13,533 --> 00:22:20,440 very abusive father, and that, even in kindergarten, that she knew, 291 00:22:20,473 --> 00:22:22,442 again, that there was something different about her, 292 00:22:22,475 --> 00:22:26,479 that she wasn't the way other five-year-olds are. 293 00:22:28,114 --> 00:22:33,052 I have lived most of my life starving for affection. 294 00:22:33,085 --> 00:22:39,959 Both spiritual and emotional hunger. I lived through movie stars. 295 00:22:39,992 --> 00:22:46,866 Most of my teen and pre-teen years were spent very lonely, looking at movie magazines. 296 00:22:46,899 --> 00:22:49,636 I was in love with Laurence Harvey. 297 00:22:49,669 --> 00:22:52,839 Every day I would watch the Million Dollar Movie and long for him. 298 00:22:57,910 --> 00:23:02,915 Too gentle. Too gentle for the bullies. 299 00:23:07,186 --> 00:23:10,056 Nobody loves me, or wants me. 300 00:23:10,089 --> 00:23:15,895 I lead a dull, uninteresting existence. 301 00:23:15,928 --> 00:23:20,467 I'm in homeroom now, and there's a bunch of chicks in here, and they all hate me. 302 00:23:20,500 --> 00:23:25,938 Someday, I'll be a movie star. That's it. 303 00:23:25,972 --> 00:23:30,477 And I'll be rich, and famous, and have all the friends I want. 304 00:23:32,244 --> 00:23:35,615 And she told me how her mother would try to protect her. 305 00:24:25,097 --> 00:24:29,135 Terry said that Candy would come home and, um, 306 00:24:29,168 --> 00:24:33,172 she would see, her lips would be very red, and she'd say, "Why, uh, Jimmy, 307 00:24:33,205 --> 00:24:37,544 are you wearing lipstick?" and Candy would say "No, no, of course not!" 308 00:24:37,577 --> 00:24:40,713 And sometimes Candy's cheeks would be a little bit flushed, 309 00:24:40,747 --> 00:24:43,550 and Terry would say "Are you wearing makeup?" 310 00:25:43,242 --> 00:25:45,712 It was a place for people who didn't fit in. 311 00:25:45,745 --> 00:25:48,781 Not people who pretended not to fit in. 312 00:25:48,815 --> 00:25:54,186 People who actually could go to jail. People who actually couldn't get a job. 313 00:25:54,220 --> 00:25:57,657 People who actually did something that no one was interested in. 314 00:26:01,928 --> 00:26:06,933 A lot of people were either really crazy, or pretending to be really crazy, 315 00:26:06,966 --> 00:26:10,803 you know, both of which were annoying. 316 00:26:10,837 --> 00:26:15,341 People were so stoned, and so screwed up, that from one minute to the next, 317 00:26:15,374 --> 00:26:18,711 you didn't even know who you were talking to. 318 00:26:18,745 --> 00:26:20,880 People were becoming more into image, 319 00:26:20,913 --> 00:26:24,951 and less into what was the reality of things. 320 00:26:24,984 --> 00:26:28,988 And you basically were what you said you were. 321 00:26:33,926 --> 00:26:38,698 When I first met Candy, Candy wasn't even in women's clothing, 322 00:26:38,731 --> 00:26:41,968 because it was illegal in New York. It was called female impersonation, 323 00:26:42,001 --> 00:26:47,239 if you were wearing any, uh, any women's clothes, they would arrest you. 324 00:26:47,273 --> 00:26:52,011 You know, you had to wear pants, or, you know, she... we all dressed with bulky sweaters, 325 00:26:52,044 --> 00:26:54,981 mohair sweaters as a matter of fact, 326 00:26:55,014 --> 00:26:58,851 tight pants, and just a little bit of mascara, 327 00:26:58,885 --> 00:27:00,586 that's all you could get away with. 328 00:27:00,619 --> 00:27:04,090 And if the cops put a flashlight to your face, and they said "you're wearing mascara", 329 00:27:04,123 --> 00:27:06,392 and it was true, (sqwish) they would throw you in jail, 330 00:27:06,425 --> 00:27:08,995 that's how tough New York was at that time. 331 00:27:09,028 --> 00:27:12,431 It was dangerous for a man to walk down the street wearing a dress. 332 00:27:12,464 --> 00:27:14,066 You know, it was illegal. 333 00:27:14,100 --> 00:27:16,736 And it wasn't just dangerous with cops; it was dangerous. 334 00:27:16,769 --> 00:27:19,405 And believe me, if someone had gotten beaten up for doing that, 335 00:27:19,438 --> 00:27:22,141 no one would have felt sorry for that person. 336 00:27:22,174 --> 00:27:26,746 Well, I'm a surviving street queen from Christopher Street, 337 00:27:26,779 --> 00:27:30,850 and, like, a generation of people who were on the streets who were gay, 338 00:27:30,883 --> 00:27:35,922 just hung out together, and Greenwich Village was the place to do it. 339 00:27:35,955 --> 00:27:42,061 The times were not easy, and, as I said, a lot of us had to carry shopping bags with our drag, 340 00:27:42,094 --> 00:27:44,897 and later, stepping into doorways and what have you, 341 00:27:44,931 --> 00:27:49,769 got further in drag, until the magic hour, after dark. 342 00:27:49,802 --> 00:27:54,807 But much later, you were screaming, screaming, and feeling very comfortable, 343 00:27:54,841 --> 00:27:56,575 because there were so many. 344 00:27:56,608 --> 00:28:02,148 For want or reason, we would all get out, and stand under the street sign that said "Gay", 345 00:28:02,181 --> 00:28:06,452 and yell "what is the name of this street?" "GAY STREET!" 346 00:28:06,485 --> 00:28:12,058 But Candy would do it so much like a glamorous star: "Gay Street..." 347 00:28:12,091 --> 00:28:15,161 Not many people really, like, knew her during that, 348 00:28:15,194 --> 00:28:21,200 because she was "Hope Slattery" then. She went through many personas. 349 00:28:21,233 --> 00:28:24,503 She was trying to, like, figure out where she was going. 350 00:28:24,536 --> 00:28:30,142 The very first time I met Candy, was, uh, I remember, 351 00:28:30,176 --> 00:28:37,216 I was facing Washington Square Park. And Candy was against the railing. 352 00:28:37,249 --> 00:28:41,821 And, um, she was sort of, she hadn't gone completely drag at that time. 353 00:28:41,854 --> 00:28:44,123 She was sort of like at a transition stage, you know. 354 00:28:44,156 --> 00:28:48,861 And, um, I thought she was, at first I thought she was a lesbian. 355 00:28:48,895 --> 00:28:52,832 You see, when we first met, a long time ago, 356 00:28:52,865 --> 00:28:56,068 she was staying at the Hotel Seventeen, and I was living here, 357 00:28:56,102 --> 00:29:00,106 and we bumped into each other, and she used to wear the same suit all the time, 358 00:29:00,139 --> 00:29:04,010 so I knew it was her, 'cause then she was sneaking out of the Hotel Seventeen, 359 00:29:04,043 --> 00:29:07,847 'cause she wasn't paying her bill, you know. 360 00:29:07,880 --> 00:29:12,251 She and Jackie became very close, and Jackie was into theater, 361 00:29:12,284 --> 00:29:15,988 she was a playwright, you know, she was into the Off-off-Broadway thing, 362 00:29:16,022 --> 00:29:20,893 you know, she was into theater and Candy, you know, normally, got into it. 363 00:29:20,927 --> 00:29:28,935 And then she got the love from an audience. Every night. And started becoming a star. 364 00:29:29,135 --> 00:29:31,337 "Jackie Curtis' campy 'Glamor, Glory, and Gold', 365 00:29:31,370 --> 00:29:35,141 at the Playwrights Workshop," and this is by Dan Sullivan in the New York Times, 366 00:29:35,174 --> 00:29:39,178 "a skinny actress billed as Candy Darling also makes an impression. 367 00:29:39,211 --> 00:29:43,015 Hers was the first female impersonation of a female impersonator 368 00:29:43,049 --> 00:29:45,117 that I have ever seen." 369 00:29:45,151 --> 00:29:48,988 Warhol came to see the first "Glamor, Glory, and Gold" and gave us a quote: 370 00:29:49,021 --> 00:29:52,291 "For the first time, I wasn't bored." 371 00:29:52,324 --> 00:29:55,594 This was about, this was about 1967, right? 372 00:29:55,627 --> 00:29:59,465 Right, she wasn't that notorious yet, you know. 373 00:29:59,498 --> 00:30:04,170 She wasn't always as careful then about her beard. 374 00:30:04,203 --> 00:30:08,841 She was just a talented girl, as far as I was concerned, that at that time, 375 00:30:08,875 --> 00:30:11,310 needed her hair bleached to blonde. 376 00:30:11,343 --> 00:30:15,447 And then, after that, she, she stayed blonde. 377 00:30:15,481 --> 00:30:17,950 And she also stayed with that blonde attitude. 378 00:30:17,984 --> 00:30:22,955 "MAKEUP" by Lou Reed * Then comes pancake, Factor Number One, 379 00:30:22,989 --> 00:30:27,193 eyeliner, rosehips, and lip gloss, such fun; 380 00:30:27,226 --> 00:30:32,331 you're a slick little girl; 381 00:30:32,364 --> 00:30:36,368 you're a slick little girl... 382 00:30:38,470 --> 00:30:43,342 Rouge and coloring, incense and ice; 383 00:30:43,375 --> 00:30:47,513 perfume and kisses, ooh, it's all so nice; 384 00:30:47,546 --> 00:30:53,019 you're a slick little girl; 385 00:30:53,052 --> 00:30:59,225 you're such a slick little girl...* 386 00:30:59,258 --> 00:31:04,330 I am an irresistible magnet, with the power to attract unto myself 387 00:31:04,363 --> 00:31:09,101 everything that I divinely desire, according to my thoughts, feelings, 388 00:31:09,135 --> 00:31:13,572 and the mental pictures I constantly entertain and radiate. 389 00:31:13,605 --> 00:31:16,075 I am the center of my universe. 390 00:31:17,276 --> 00:31:22,114 There was a period when Candy was going around 391 00:31:22,148 --> 00:31:29,521 picking up, uh, handmaidens. Little assistants, little slaves, all of the above! 392 00:31:29,555 --> 00:31:31,157 You know what I mean? Without paying them. 393 00:31:31,190 --> 00:31:37,063 Just, you know, just: "You are in the presence of..." You know, that was enough. 394 00:31:37,096 --> 00:31:43,302 I, I think Jeremiah, at one point, was one of Candy's little, 395 00:31:43,335 --> 00:31:46,072 "Would you like this, would you like that?", you know... 396 00:31:46,105 --> 00:31:52,311 Jeremiah Newton was like a younger brother to Candy Darling. 397 00:31:52,344 --> 00:31:56,482 Um, she knew he was star-struck by her beauty and her talent, 398 00:31:56,515 --> 00:32:00,086 and therefore would do anything for her. 399 00:32:00,119 --> 00:32:05,624 He was willing to do anything for her. And Jeremiah did everything for her. 400 00:32:05,657 --> 00:32:09,495 She did open doors for me, no doubt about that. 401 00:32:09,528 --> 00:32:13,199 And of course, the Factory, she brought me up to the Factory, 402 00:32:13,232 --> 00:32:19,271 and introduced me to Andy and Fred and Bob and Vincent and Fran Lebowitz, 403 00:32:19,305 --> 00:32:25,244 and all these people, and they were very cool, so... And, um, and great, 404 00:32:25,277 --> 00:32:29,181 you know? That was great, the fact that I could go up to the Factory, 405 00:32:29,215 --> 00:32:32,584 and when I got up to the floor, this eye would look in the door, 406 00:32:32,618 --> 00:32:34,153 the door was always locked, 407 00:32:34,186 --> 00:32:37,523 and there was a peephole, and the eye would look in the elevator, like this, 408 00:32:37,556 --> 00:32:40,159 and you'd still be standing in the elevator, 409 00:32:40,192 --> 00:32:42,328 and then when they'd see me, they'd open the door. 410 00:32:42,361 --> 00:32:45,697 "Oh, it's Jeremiah, let him in," you know? And that was very cool. 411 00:32:47,533 --> 00:32:53,472 Going out with people who don't enjoy my fame. And people who enjoy it too much. 412 00:32:53,505 --> 00:32:57,276 People who are constantly looking at me when I go out. 413 00:32:57,309 --> 00:33:02,448 There are so many different kinds of fame. My type is curious. 414 00:33:02,481 --> 00:33:07,486 When strangers talk to me, they don't really listen. They're too busy looking. 415 00:33:07,519 --> 00:33:13,192 If one desires money and fame too much, it can poison this life. 416 00:33:13,225 --> 00:33:17,229 I must conquer New York - or be conquered. 417 00:33:17,263 --> 00:33:19,298 * "In Crowd" by Bryan Ferry 418 00:33:19,331 --> 00:33:26,272 I'm in with the "In" crowd, I go where the "In" crowd goes 419 00:33:26,305 --> 00:33:34,313 I'm in with the "In" crowd, and I know what the "In" crowd knows * 420 00:33:34,413 --> 00:33:37,616 Part of our life then was going to Max's every night. 421 00:33:37,649 --> 00:33:42,521 So, you know, you'd go to Max's, and you'd go to the back room, and you'd meet Candy Darling. 422 00:33:42,554 --> 00:33:47,259 A wonderful, simple, minimal, pink sculpture in the corner of the room, 423 00:33:47,293 --> 00:33:49,628 where I, which was my table, and Nico's. 424 00:33:49,661 --> 00:33:53,332 And then Andy had a big round table over in the other corner, 425 00:33:53,365 --> 00:33:59,638 with whoever it was he was flattering, Candy, Jackie, whoever. 426 00:34:03,575 --> 00:34:08,814 I wanted to go. I wanted a cool place to go. I knew Candy went there. 427 00:34:11,883 --> 00:34:18,357 She'd go into the back room, and you know... models, fashion designers, 428 00:34:18,390 --> 00:34:25,397 they were all going oh, oh, Candy, Jackie, Holly, mwah, mwah, can I touch you! 429 00:34:26,465 --> 00:34:28,867 Basically, you're talking about an entire group of people 430 00:34:28,900 --> 00:34:32,104 who'd have a tantrum if everyone wasn't paying attention to them. 431 00:34:32,138 --> 00:34:33,805 And it was not just for the attention of Andy, 432 00:34:33,839 --> 00:34:39,111 it was for the attention of the back room at Max's, you know, they wanted to be stars. 433 00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:45,851 Once in a while Candy would say "Oh!", let out a slight shout, 434 00:34:45,884 --> 00:34:51,490 and then go back into her glamour, just being watched. 435 00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:58,764 I remember sitting there, and a few of my high school chums, 436 00:34:58,797 --> 00:35:02,434 that I didn't like, saw me in the back room. 437 00:35:02,468 --> 00:35:06,605 And the guard at the back room said, "Boys, you can't come in here. This is special." 438 00:35:06,638 --> 00:35:10,476 And they were so mad, they couldn't believe it. And I loved it, I said "Yes! 439 00:35:10,509 --> 00:35:14,180 This is good, this is really good. I'm so happy now!" 440 00:35:18,717 --> 00:35:21,620 People were very interesting. I mean, even in retrospect. 441 00:35:21,653 --> 00:35:25,157 Not every person. It was a, I think, pretty interesting group. It was fun. 442 00:35:25,191 --> 00:35:26,492 I mean, it was really fun. 443 00:35:37,669 --> 00:35:40,939 Oh yes, I'd love to. 444 00:35:40,972 --> 00:35:45,644 Well, um, I'm at the Factory. I'm at the Factory, 445 00:35:45,677 --> 00:35:49,815 924-4344. 446 00:35:52,684 --> 00:35:57,656 "Dear Candy Darling, I'm sure you remember me. 447 00:35:57,689 --> 00:36:03,729 I was the manager of the Vista Theater on Sunset Drive, Hollywood, California. 448 00:36:03,762 --> 00:36:09,268 You meet me" - he wrote "meet me" and not "met me" - "you meet me last November" 449 00:36:09,301 --> 00:36:16,775 - he's an Indian, I think - "while seeing the movie 'Lorna', a Russ Meyer production. 450 00:36:16,808 --> 00:36:21,713 I am currently in the New York area for the next few months, 451 00:36:21,747 --> 00:36:24,350 but will return to Hollywood for a similar position." 452 00:36:24,383 --> 00:36:29,321 Maybe he'll take me with him... if I get in a similar position. 453 00:36:29,355 --> 00:36:31,557 "If you are in the New York area" - 454 00:36:31,590 --> 00:36:33,859 I have a dirty mind these days, I don't know what happens to me. 455 00:36:33,892 --> 00:36:39,298 I think that something happened to me since I became a redhead - I got more torrid. 456 00:36:39,331 --> 00:36:42,301 Uh... do you like the color of my hair? 457 00:36:42,334 --> 00:36:45,937 Well, I think the atmosphere of Andy's studio in the early 70's 458 00:36:45,971 --> 00:36:49,975 was a big departure from the Silver Factory. 459 00:36:50,008 --> 00:36:52,878 It was considered by some more formal. 460 00:36:52,911 --> 00:36:58,350 So there was this time, I think '70 to '73, um, when the 60's were over, 461 00:36:58,384 --> 00:37:00,819 but the 70's hadn't started. 462 00:37:00,852 --> 00:37:06,325 And that's when this surge of Hollywood nostalgia came in, and Candy was right in there, 463 00:37:06,358 --> 00:37:09,628 somewhere between the past and the future. 464 00:37:13,432 --> 00:37:15,901 There was really something there. 465 00:37:15,934 --> 00:37:21,740 There was really something about to be... really like Marilyn, it was there. 466 00:37:21,773 --> 00:37:24,410 It needed urging, and bringing out, 467 00:37:24,443 --> 00:37:29,681 and being in love with by the person on the other side of the camera. 468 00:37:29,715 --> 00:37:34,486 And being adored, and being allowed. 469 00:37:34,520 --> 00:37:39,891 That's the biggest verb in anyone's life, is to be allowed, to be yourself. 470 00:37:39,925 --> 00:37:41,793 Candy fit in perfectly. 471 00:37:41,827 --> 00:37:43,362 Because she was like a real 472 00:37:43,395 --> 00:37:45,864 movie star from MGM or something, at the time 473 00:37:45,897 --> 00:37:48,967 only in a world that was filled with LSD. 474 00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:53,305 And speed, really. Speed. 475 00:37:53,339 --> 00:37:55,907 There was a concerted effort to have a stable of stars. 476 00:37:55,941 --> 00:37:59,378 I mean, Andy collected film stills, framed, of various movie stars, 477 00:37:59,411 --> 00:38:02,914 there was a studio that started evolving. 478 00:38:02,948 --> 00:38:10,489 And Jackie, and Candy, and Holly Woodlawn, those were the three pre-eminent ladies, 479 00:38:10,522 --> 00:38:15,060 in quotes, if you want to say, but those were the three, you know, stars. 480 00:38:15,093 --> 00:38:21,367 And Jackie would give you an hour of, a philosophical hour of something, 481 00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:25,771 you know, and Holly'd just, you know, swig something and say "Motherfucker", 482 00:38:25,804 --> 00:38:33,545 and Candy'd just give you that look: the "I'm too grand to sink to your level" look. 483 00:38:33,579 --> 00:38:36,948 They lived from hand to mouth, they moved in with friends, 484 00:38:36,982 --> 00:38:43,121 they would come to the office once in a while, drop in to use the phone, 485 00:38:43,154 --> 00:38:46,458 'cause they didn't have phones. They couldn't have phones, didn't pay phone bills. 486 00:38:51,062 --> 00:38:55,100 Candy could come up and just hang around there, and look through scrapbooks. 487 00:38:55,133 --> 00:38:58,570 Or, you know, wait for Andy to come, when he was done shopping, and say 488 00:38:58,604 --> 00:39:00,338 "I want to talk to you about something," 489 00:39:00,372 --> 00:39:04,876 and maybe she'd have an idea for a way to get money out of him, or an idea for a movie, 490 00:39:04,910 --> 00:39:06,578 and, you know, he'd be glad to see her. 491 00:39:06,612 --> 00:39:11,650 I remember when she came up with Jeremiah Newton, as a young kid, 492 00:39:11,683 --> 00:39:13,985 you know, I think we were always trying to figure out what was going on there, 493 00:39:14,019 --> 00:39:17,523 and Andy liked to ponder these kinds of things, so it was interesting. 494 00:39:17,556 --> 00:39:20,459 Andy never was afraid of Candy. 495 00:39:20,492 --> 00:39:23,395 Andy never, never thought that Candy would turn on him. 496 00:39:23,429 --> 00:39:27,466 Andy never had to be locked up in the editing room because of Candy. 497 00:39:27,499 --> 00:39:31,069 He did because of Jackie, and Holly, when they would completely freak out, 498 00:39:31,102 --> 00:39:35,173 and demand money, and be screaming and shouting and pounding on the door. 499 00:39:35,206 --> 00:39:38,610 You attract a lot of those people up at the Factory, though, in your films? 500 00:39:38,644 --> 00:39:40,612 What? Closet queens? 501 00:39:40,646 --> 00:39:43,081 Not closet queens, drag queens. 502 00:39:43,114 --> 00:39:49,521 Drag queens... well, the people we use aren't really drag queens, 503 00:39:49,555 --> 00:39:55,694 because drag queens are people who just sort of dress up, for, uh, you know, 504 00:39:55,727 --> 00:39:58,964 8 hours a day or something like that. 505 00:39:58,997 --> 00:40:03,535 And the kind of people we really use are people who think they, uh, 506 00:40:03,569 --> 00:40:06,638 are really girls and stuff, so that's sort of different. 507 00:40:06,672 --> 00:40:11,142 Pre-op, post-op, transvestite, drag queen, 508 00:40:11,176 --> 00:40:17,082 transvestite that's straight and fucks women, transvestite that's gay and fucks men, 509 00:40:17,115 --> 00:40:22,754 daytime drag queens, the, the, the classifications go on and on and on. 510 00:40:22,788 --> 00:40:26,525 And Candy was not a transvestite. Candy was a transsexual. 511 00:40:26,558 --> 00:40:28,326 She wanted to be a woman. 512 00:40:28,359 --> 00:40:32,531 She didn't want to be called "he"; she wanted to be called "she", because she was a she. 513 00:40:32,564 --> 00:40:36,101 She was a beautiful, female goddess. 514 00:40:36,134 --> 00:40:38,670 Candy Darling, what is a goddess? 515 00:40:38,704 --> 00:40:43,709 A goddess is someone that's worshipped from afar. 516 00:40:43,742 --> 00:40:48,246 And a star is someone that has an unknown quality. 517 00:40:48,279 --> 00:40:53,552 A transgender person, uh, the medical profession call them transsexuals, 518 00:40:53,585 --> 00:40:56,187 perceive themselves as women. 519 00:40:56,221 --> 00:41:00,492 They either want to be a woman, or they already perceive themselves as a woman, 520 00:41:00,526 --> 00:41:03,729 and they were gypped by having a male's body, 521 00:41:03,762 --> 00:41:06,565 so what you do, you take hormones. Candy took hormones. 522 00:41:06,598 --> 00:41:10,602 She took hormones in order to make her body fit what was in her brain. 523 00:41:23,815 --> 00:41:27,786 The doctor told me that, um, the pills she was taking, 524 00:41:27,819 --> 00:41:31,723 which was the cancerous pills, did nothing for her. 525 00:41:31,757 --> 00:41:34,225 And I threw them down the toilet bowl. 526 00:41:34,259 --> 00:41:40,766 They were big, black pills, shaped like an eye, like sort of, um, almond shaped. 527 00:41:40,799 --> 00:41:44,903 And they sat in that toilet and looked at me, so help me God, 528 00:41:44,936 --> 00:41:48,674 they just sat, they wouldn't dissolve, they just sat there. 529 00:41:48,707 --> 00:41:51,643 And she said "Put your hand in the toilet and get the pills out," 530 00:41:51,677 --> 00:41:52,944 and I said "I'm not doing that." 531 00:41:52,978 --> 00:41:54,713 And when you get to a point where you're doing the hormones, 532 00:41:54,746 --> 00:41:59,851 and you're looking good, and you can pass in the streets, you're like, you can breathe. 533 00:41:59,885 --> 00:42:05,724 You're like, no one's yelling "faggot" at me anymore. No one's calling me a man. 534 00:42:05,757 --> 00:42:09,761 Someone's saying, (cat whistle)"Baby, you want a date?" 535 00:42:09,795 --> 00:42:13,298 And that's a big, hunky straight man talking. And Candy loved that. 536 00:42:16,935 --> 00:42:19,805 She was really cool looking, I'll tell you. 537 00:42:19,838 --> 00:42:22,641 You didn't care if it was a guy. 538 00:42:22,674 --> 00:42:25,744 As a girlfriend, Candy was totally feminine. 539 00:42:25,777 --> 00:42:33,785 I never thought of Candy as a man, I never had any sense of a man there with me. 540 00:42:34,352 --> 00:42:36,788 It was always a woman. 541 00:42:36,822 --> 00:42:39,791 One time she suggested we get together and wash each other's hair, 542 00:42:39,825 --> 00:42:43,294 and I thought "I wash my hair in the shower; I don't think I'm ready for that!" 543 00:42:43,328 --> 00:42:47,799 "She's About a Mover" by Doug Sham * Whoa, she was walking down the street 544 00:42:47,833 --> 00:42:50,969 looking fine as she could be? 545 00:42:51,002 --> 00:42:52,771 It's a little bit over the top. 546 00:42:52,804 --> 00:42:58,009 Although, Candy kept it, but there were times, sometimes, you could see, it was a little... 547 00:42:58,043 --> 00:43:02,848 the reactions, the movements, you know, 548 00:43:02,881 --> 00:43:07,018 "oh yes", that kind of thing, even the voice, 549 00:43:07,052 --> 00:43:13,058 the serenity of the voice - you know, women don't speak like that all the time. 550 00:43:15,093 --> 00:43:20,398 * Hey, hey, She's About a Mover, (mover) 551 00:43:20,431 --> 00:43:25,103 She's About a Mover She's about a Mover * 552 00:43:25,136 --> 00:43:30,341 A real woman doesn't think about it. You know, I mean, it's not a goal. 553 00:43:30,375 --> 00:43:33,912 So there's not all that intention. And there's not all that desire. 554 00:43:33,945 --> 00:43:38,684 And real women know all the, also, bad things there are about being a woman. 555 00:43:38,717 --> 00:43:43,889 Candy loved it. She attracted so many men. 556 00:43:47,125 --> 00:43:51,863 She dated, uh... she tended to date, uh... 557 00:43:51,897 --> 00:43:54,966 She never was with anybody. Not that I know of. 558 00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:59,738 ...European nobility. Minor nobility. 559 00:43:59,771 --> 00:44:02,941 I...she never discussed any of that with me. 560 00:44:02,974 --> 00:44:05,744 I don't know anything about any of that. 561 00:44:05,777 --> 00:44:09,881 She would borrow my clothes, when she was living with me in Queens, 562 00:44:09,915 --> 00:44:13,151 and she would go off in my clothes... 563 00:44:13,184 --> 00:44:17,756 Maybe she talked to other people about it. But me, she would just sort of - 564 00:44:17,789 --> 00:44:22,093 and then come back the next day, and they would be ripped, shredded, 565 00:44:22,127 --> 00:44:25,897 I would say "well obviously your date didn't go, you know", 566 00:44:25,931 --> 00:44:29,200 and she would say, "he wanted me to put out!" 567 00:44:29,234 --> 00:44:32,103 * Yeah, baby what'd I say 568 00:44:32,137 --> 00:44:34,472 She was engaged to an Italian count. He was gorgeous. 569 00:44:34,505 --> 00:44:37,042 And I know she was in love with Gerard Malanga. 570 00:44:37,075 --> 00:44:38,309 I'm flattered. I didn't know that. 571 00:44:38,343 --> 00:44:40,378 And I would tell her, I said, you know, honey, 572 00:44:40,411 --> 00:44:42,881 eventually you're going to have to come out, you know, and be honest, 573 00:44:42,914 --> 00:44:48,887 and say hello, you know, this, in here, down here, whatever, you know, 574 00:44:48,920 --> 00:44:53,191 is not what you... you know... and you either love me for me, 575 00:44:53,224 --> 00:44:59,464 and this is the icing, or, you know... Keep on looking, Candy. 576 00:44:59,497 --> 00:45:01,833 I am not a genuine woman. 577 00:45:01,867 --> 00:45:05,336 But I am not interested in genuineness. 578 00:45:05,370 --> 00:45:10,708 I am interested in the product of being a woman, and how qualified I am. 579 00:45:13,178 --> 00:45:20,819 He called me beautiful. I am! 580 00:45:20,852 --> 00:45:27,926 You are. Just... just beautiful. Come on. 581 00:45:40,038 --> 00:45:45,443 They all had to say I was beautiful. 582 00:45:45,476 --> 00:45:50,481 Prettier than she is. 583 00:45:53,584 --> 00:45:55,353 She was at the Italian Consulate, 584 00:45:55,386 --> 00:45:58,223 and she came down the stairs into the ballroom. 585 00:45:58,256 --> 00:46:03,161 People stopped, dead, she looked that good. 586 00:46:04,996 --> 00:46:09,434 And she said to me afterwards, she said, "You know, all these men love me, 587 00:46:09,467 --> 00:46:13,038 but if they knew, they would kill me." 588 00:46:13,071 --> 00:46:16,007 I have always found that socially unacceptable people 589 00:46:16,041 --> 00:46:20,879 make the best lovers because they are more sensitive. 590 00:46:20,912 --> 00:46:25,884 Sandy spoke to me on the phone today and suggested a sex change. 591 00:46:25,917 --> 00:46:27,986 Tricky Mother Nature. 592 00:46:28,386 --> 00:46:32,958 She realized that, uh, she wouldn't be Candy Darling any more. 593 00:46:32,991 --> 00:46:36,427 She had seen other people who had sex changes, and they weren't fabulous, 594 00:46:36,461 --> 00:46:38,997 they were like normal women. 595 00:46:39,030 --> 00:46:42,901 I showed some pictures to Steven of how I used to look. 596 00:46:42,934 --> 00:46:50,876 There was a picture of me about 8 years old. I was so beautiful and real. 597 00:46:50,909 --> 00:46:52,543 It had a very sobering effect on me. 598 00:46:55,113 --> 00:46:59,885 There's a tremendous earnestness in wanting to be another gender. 599 00:46:59,918 --> 00:47:03,088 I mean, what's more earnest than that? And naive? 600 00:47:03,121 --> 00:47:06,992 I mean, I think it's tremendously naive. Especially a man who wants to be a woman. 601 00:47:07,025 --> 00:47:11,629 You know, I mean: Keep your winning hand. 602 00:47:11,662 --> 00:47:18,069 I've been up all night, alone, wondering about my identity, 603 00:47:18,103 --> 00:47:23,909 trying to look for an explanation for living this strange, stylized sexuality. 604 00:47:23,942 --> 00:47:27,979 Realization cuts feeling off. 605 00:47:28,013 --> 00:47:32,050 I try to explain my identity as being a male who has assumed the attitudes, 606 00:47:32,083 --> 00:47:38,957 and somewhat the emotions, of a female. I don't know which role to play. 607 00:47:38,990 --> 00:47:42,427 A 25 year old man, who becomes a 25 year old woman, 608 00:47:42,460 --> 00:47:46,431 is not a woman at all, because a woman first has to be a little girl, 609 00:47:46,464 --> 00:47:51,102 okay, a man first has to be a boy. Candy was never a girl. 610 00:47:51,136 --> 00:47:54,105 Candy was a fantasy. She created herself. 611 00:47:54,139 --> 00:47:58,676 If you called Candy a "he", it was a flinch. Like with me, 612 00:47:58,709 --> 00:48:02,914 if I hear "he", it's a flinch. It's like someone slapping you in the face. 613 00:48:02,948 --> 00:48:06,084 You have to accept a transgender person's perception of what they are, 614 00:48:06,117 --> 00:48:11,022 or you are disrespecting their gender, and that is really wrong. 615 00:48:11,056 --> 00:48:14,993 And to those people that want to call Candy a "he", you are transphobe, 616 00:48:15,026 --> 00:48:15,994 and you shut your mouth. 617 00:48:29,707 --> 00:48:34,645 I mean, we were very happy when we were in the play that we did last summer, 618 00:48:34,679 --> 00:48:36,247 called "Vain Victory". 619 00:48:36,281 --> 00:48:37,648 Oh, we had our, you know, tiffs. 620 00:48:37,682 --> 00:48:42,020 Oh yes, but even that was fun, it was exciting, you know, 621 00:48:42,053 --> 00:48:47,225 we were always appearing in front of people, and getting a lot of applause. 622 00:48:47,258 --> 00:48:50,228 I mean, I love the sound of applause. 623 00:48:50,261 --> 00:48:54,165 I mean, I suppose these days, you're not supposed to like those things, you know, 624 00:48:54,199 --> 00:48:59,170 you're supposed to be very humble and like the earth, and all that. And we do. 625 00:48:59,204 --> 00:49:03,208 You know, actually, I'm very athletic, which nobody ever seems to realize, 626 00:49:03,241 --> 00:49:08,646 because, I mean, I would love to go camping sometime, but, I mean, 627 00:49:08,679 --> 00:49:11,316 my friends never ask me, because they just, uh, 628 00:49:11,349 --> 00:49:14,685 probably always think of me as the salon type! 629 00:49:14,719 --> 00:49:18,723 * da,da,da,da,da,da,da,da 630 00:49:23,394 --> 00:49:31,336 * "Oh, Flo, such a shame you know, When she left the Village she was shy, 631 00:49:31,369 --> 00:49:39,377 But alas and alack, she's come back, With a naughty little twinkle in her eye."* 632 00:49:40,378 --> 00:49:43,748 It was the first Off-off-Broadway show to rehearse for six months, 633 00:49:43,781 --> 00:49:47,352 as opposed to a week, and it ran for six months, 634 00:49:47,385 --> 00:49:52,090 which is the first time an Off-off-Broadway show had run for longer than two weeks. 635 00:49:52,123 --> 00:49:54,225 So we were successful in that way. 636 00:49:54,259 --> 00:49:59,230 And everybody came to see us, either in rehearsals, or when it actually opened. 637 00:49:59,264 --> 00:50:02,233 I mean, even Andy Warhol showed up for opening night. 638 00:50:02,267 --> 00:50:04,302 Candy was the real star of the show. 639 00:50:04,335 --> 00:50:12,343 * My place tonight fellas, my place tonight fellas... 640 00:50:12,677 --> 00:50:18,249 Who is that lucky boy * 641 00:50:18,283 --> 00:50:20,818 "Vain Victory" was a living piece of theater. 642 00:50:20,851 --> 00:50:25,390 There was a structure and a story, but it kept evolving. 643 00:50:25,423 --> 00:50:28,526 This is all I could find, it's done by Bob Gruen, 644 00:50:28,559 --> 00:50:32,163 who was John and Yoko's official photographer, 645 00:50:32,197 --> 00:50:37,268 and this was taken at LaMaMa's rehearsal loft, on Great Jones Street. 646 00:50:37,302 --> 00:50:42,273 We have Ondine, who's in heaven, Candy, who's in heaven, 647 00:50:42,307 --> 00:50:44,809 Jackie Curtis, who is in heaven, 648 00:50:44,842 --> 00:50:49,280 and then we have Dorian Gray, who is in heaven, and then there's "moi". 649 00:50:49,314 --> 00:50:52,850 Many playwrights were doing so many kinds of things, there was no wrong, 650 00:50:52,883 --> 00:50:54,552 you were expressing yourself. 651 00:50:54,585 --> 00:50:56,254 We lived very hard. 652 00:50:56,287 --> 00:50:59,157 We lived 24 hours a day. I mean, we were all on speed. 653 00:51:03,361 --> 00:51:09,300 Candy would say "oh, our tits are flying now! Let's go!" 654 00:51:11,869 --> 00:51:15,440 I think that it was probably an outlet for transvestites as well, 655 00:51:15,473 --> 00:51:18,443 because, well, it was the Village, a lot of it was happening in the Village, 656 00:51:18,476 --> 00:51:22,347 and there was such a lack of discrimination on every level 657 00:51:22,380 --> 00:51:28,153 that everybody had a chance to develop without society's judgment on them. 658 00:51:28,186 --> 00:51:35,326 Pacino was in that basement, and Jill Clayburgh, and DeNiro, of course, and a lot of people. 659 00:51:35,360 --> 00:51:40,198 She was totally accepted there. That's what saved her, really. 660 00:51:40,231 --> 00:51:44,502 And she could get right into the fantasy world, you know, of the avant-garde, 661 00:51:44,535 --> 00:51:47,338 because the plays were above reality. 662 00:51:47,372 --> 00:51:54,179 A story so touching, it must be told with a whip. 663 00:51:54,212 --> 00:51:58,283 A love tale of vicious simplicity, involving two pyromaniacs, 664 00:51:58,316 --> 00:52:01,219 freaked out over a couple of flip-out hairdressers, 665 00:52:01,252 --> 00:52:03,521 who chained them to a beige hairdryer, 666 00:52:03,554 --> 00:52:07,458 to match the lithograph of the Maltese Vertebrae. 667 00:52:07,492 --> 00:52:11,629 It's a very difficult thing to make someone believe your fantasy. 668 00:52:11,662 --> 00:52:16,467 And Candy did that. 669 00:52:16,501 --> 00:52:20,471 I was always looking for something that was different, that was theatrical. 670 00:52:20,505 --> 00:52:24,375 And I thought she would be great, theatrical, in a nightclub act, to do a show. 671 00:52:24,409 --> 00:52:30,415 So I had several meetings at my office, just with Candy Darling. 672 00:52:32,517 --> 00:52:36,487 Now I'd never seen her sing. But I didn't care. 673 00:52:36,521 --> 00:52:39,557 Because I know that she would have been good, and even if she wasn't good, 674 00:52:39,590 --> 00:52:42,560 she'd be interesting enough just to sit and talk about her life. 675 00:52:42,593 --> 00:52:46,531 And I could have staged her in such a way, you know, with 676 00:52:46,564 --> 00:52:51,202 black, with very white, hot light... 677 00:52:51,236 --> 00:52:53,538 She was witty, funny, smart, beautiful, 678 00:52:53,571 --> 00:52:58,209 and had a certain cachet as being revolutionary, just by how she lived her life, 679 00:52:58,243 --> 00:53:01,379 especially at that time. She was one of the front-runners of that. 680 00:53:01,412 --> 00:53:07,252 The other ones were freakish, and she was beautiful, in a way that really put people off, 681 00:53:07,285 --> 00:53:10,355 and drew them to her at the same time, because it confused them. 682 00:53:10,388 --> 00:53:12,657 You could say "well, she was an actress every second of her life." 683 00:53:12,690 --> 00:53:15,560 You know, that's what you would call it now, you know, but then you might say 684 00:53:15,593 --> 00:53:17,995 "she was phony every second of her life." 685 00:53:18,028 --> 00:53:19,464 I never went that far with Candy Darling, 686 00:53:19,497 --> 00:53:22,500 with really getting her out there to do something with her, because... 687 00:53:22,533 --> 00:53:25,603 I don't know what stopped us. Maybe Andy stopped it. 688 00:53:25,636 --> 00:53:29,374 Maybe Andy wanted to get too involved. Would have been an amazing thing. 689 00:53:29,407 --> 00:53:32,377 Because I think it would have been big in Europe. 690 00:53:32,410 --> 00:53:35,246 Paris, and Germany - and forget about America. 691 00:53:35,280 --> 00:53:36,914 You do a couple of cities here, and that's about it. 692 00:53:36,947 --> 00:53:44,855 If we still had French Symbolist poets, they'd all have written poems about her. 693 00:53:44,889 --> 00:53:50,728 She was just somebody who was kind of this figure, floating through all kinds of scenes. 694 00:54:00,571 --> 00:54:04,475 Visually, photographically, and conversationally, 695 00:54:04,509 --> 00:54:07,845 she was every time a coconut. Everything was interesting. 696 00:54:16,487 --> 00:54:21,592 You know, they gave me a 75 dollar hairdo. Can you believe it? 697 00:54:21,626 --> 00:54:25,696 I didn't pay for it. I can see it now, in the light, what they did. 698 00:54:25,730 --> 00:54:27,532 Was it good? Was it worth it? 699 00:54:27,565 --> 00:54:35,506 Oh God, no... I wouldn't even pay for it. 700 00:54:35,540 --> 00:54:41,912 I never pay for anything. I never have. I don't have to. 701 00:54:41,946 --> 00:54:45,650 I never pay for a thing, I never pay rent, I never buy my own clothes, 702 00:54:45,683 --> 00:54:48,386 I don't pay for anything. I put it all in the bank... 703 00:54:48,419 --> 00:54:51,656 The reality... she wouldn't deal with it. 704 00:54:51,689 --> 00:54:55,526 You're only the star of an Andy Warhol movie, and as we all know, Andy Warhol, 705 00:54:55,560 --> 00:55:00,698 well, we're not talking MGM here, you get $25 a scene for Andy Warhol, 706 00:55:00,731 --> 00:55:04,435 everything else is, you know, your next meal is coming from 707 00:55:04,469 --> 00:55:06,637 hopefully being invited to a party, you know: 708 00:55:06,671 --> 00:55:11,809 you meet rich people, and they take you out to dinner, and then, 709 00:55:11,842 --> 00:55:17,748 the next morning, you're eating what's left over from the dinner from the night before. 710 00:55:17,782 --> 00:55:20,651 Do you think I like eating bean soup and peanut butter 711 00:55:20,685 --> 00:55:26,023 for strength and protein, instead of steak? Well I don't like it. 712 00:55:26,056 --> 00:55:30,561 Do you think I like this mop of goldish-red hair, instead of the darkest ash blonde, 713 00:55:30,595 --> 00:55:34,632 with tan pearl streaks? Well, I don't like it. 714 00:55:34,665 --> 00:55:37,702 And I don't like wet cakes, and day-old bread, either. 715 00:55:37,735 --> 00:55:44,575 And I'm tired of going to beauty culture schools for a permanent. I'm just tired. 716 00:55:44,609 --> 00:55:47,044 She always had this glamorous aura about her, 717 00:55:47,077 --> 00:55:50,615 but she was always sleeping on somebody's couch. 718 00:55:50,648 --> 00:55:54,719 I had a studio apartment then, too, with red walls, I remember, 719 00:55:54,752 --> 00:55:59,757 and I would go to work in the morning, and she'd be sleeping, 720 00:55:59,790 --> 00:56:03,127 and I'd come home at six, seven o'clock, and she'd still be just getting out of bed, 721 00:56:03,160 --> 00:56:04,762 in a black slip. 722 00:56:04,795 --> 00:56:07,532 And I used to get very annoyed, I'd say, "Look at this. 723 00:56:07,565 --> 00:56:09,767 How does she get away with that?" 724 00:56:09,800 --> 00:56:15,873 She managed to convince her mother, and a number of her friends, 725 00:56:15,906 --> 00:56:22,547 that she needed to devote her entire life to trying to become a movie star. 726 00:56:22,580 --> 00:56:25,850 So she didn't even have to get a job. 727 00:56:25,883 --> 00:56:31,021 I would say that Candy is probably one of the greatest hustlers I have ever known. 728 00:56:31,055 --> 00:56:34,625 As a hustler, Candy was an ace. 729 00:56:34,659 --> 00:56:40,598 I think Candy, in order to survive - she was a survivor 730 00:56:40,631 --> 00:56:44,769 - would go and do a lot of things that she didn't talk about. 731 00:56:44,802 --> 00:56:49,740 No. She never did that. No, I'm telling you, they're wrong. 732 00:56:49,774 --> 00:56:52,943 She didn't do that. She didn't have to do that. 733 00:56:52,977 --> 00:56:56,113 Too many people loved giving her money because she was so fabulous. 734 00:57:26,110 --> 00:57:27,812 I know, she hated it. 735 00:57:32,149 --> 00:57:38,122 I now live at 14 West 68th Street, with Sam Green, who took me in. 736 00:57:38,155 --> 00:57:41,225 I will live here until, God forbid, he throws me out. 737 00:57:41,258 --> 00:57:47,464 Not that he will, and even if something did happen, I could always go to Jeremiah. 738 00:57:49,734 --> 00:57:53,838 It is now November 24th, about 4 a.m. 739 00:57:53,871 --> 00:57:59,910 Today is my birthday, and I am happy. Jeremiah is such a dear. 740 00:57:59,944 --> 00:58:05,816 He called and wants to have a party for me. I hope we are friends forever. 741 00:58:05,850 --> 00:58:09,186 I had a birthday party for her, um, 742 00:58:09,219 --> 00:58:13,223 it was fantastic, we invited tons and tons of people. 743 00:58:13,257 --> 00:58:21,265 Dear Kathy, it is Wednesday morning, December 16th, 1970, 5:30 a.m. 744 00:58:21,365 --> 00:58:29,073 I got up a little while ago. There is a storm outside. The wind is very scary. 745 00:58:29,106 --> 00:58:32,309 Candy moved in with me, this is where I had her famous birthday party 746 00:58:32,342 --> 00:58:37,782 - can I go in with you? I used to live here. I lived here in 1969. 747 00:58:40,184 --> 00:58:45,289 The party was a great success. Candy was fabulous. 748 00:58:45,322 --> 00:58:47,925 Everyone was fabulous. 749 00:58:47,958 --> 00:58:54,899 I had balloons up, and streamers, and somebody gave Candy a 1923 box of Kotex, 750 00:58:54,932 --> 00:58:58,068 all sorts of really crazy things. 751 00:58:58,102 --> 00:59:01,038 There was a lot of grass. 752 00:59:01,071 --> 00:59:07,612 It's a good thing you did not come to the party. I'm glad you didn't. 753 00:59:07,645 --> 00:59:09,914 First of all, these unexpected people showed up 754 00:59:09,947 --> 00:59:13,884 and left a boy there who was mentally retarded. 755 00:59:13,918 --> 00:59:17,187 Every time I moved, he would sit right next to me. 756 00:59:20,124 --> 00:59:24,294 And there was a boy, who looked perfectly normal, 757 00:59:24,328 --> 00:59:27,164 except he wasn't, he was retarded. 758 00:59:27,197 --> 00:59:32,369 And he adored Candy, he sat at her feet, and he just adored, he said 759 00:59:32,402 --> 00:59:36,173 "You're so beautiful, you're so beautiful." 760 00:59:36,206 --> 00:59:39,977 And she said "Yes, I know, I know." 761 00:59:40,010 --> 00:59:44,014 Jeremiah said "Do you want to sit down in the next room?" 762 00:59:44,048 --> 00:59:49,720 knowing he was cuckoo. And the boy said "No. 763 00:59:49,754 --> 00:59:53,057 I want to sit right here, next to her." 764 00:59:53,090 --> 01:00:00,097 And every time I looked at him, he looked away in shyness. Well, nobody knew what to do. 765 01:00:00,130 --> 01:00:04,301 But Jeremiah took the boy's wallet, and found his name and address in Connecticut, 766 01:00:04,334 --> 01:00:07,071 and called his parents at 2 a.m. 767 01:00:07,104 --> 01:00:12,977 He had been missing for two weeks. I was not surprised! 768 01:00:13,010 --> 01:00:17,314 At about six-thirty, a very normal looking man with two sons appeared at the door 769 01:00:17,347 --> 01:00:20,150 and was very appreciative. 770 01:00:20,184 --> 01:00:25,222 There were tears in the eyes. It was very touching. 771 01:00:25,255 --> 01:00:30,728 And Jeremiah even refused the $20 the father pressed into his hand in gratitude. 772 01:00:30,761 --> 01:00:34,999 That should give you a clue as to Jeremiah's character. 773 01:00:35,032 --> 01:00:41,706 I do hope the man didn't hear me whispering "Keep it, we need it." 774 01:00:53,483 --> 01:00:56,687 Oh, I see: "Politically Involved Girls". 775 01:00:56,721 --> 01:00:59,189 I don't suppose you've heard about women's liberation. 776 01:00:59,223 --> 01:01:04,428 Women's liberation has shown me just who I am and just what I can be! 777 01:01:04,461 --> 01:01:08,332 I can't stand the sight of men. 778 01:01:08,365 --> 01:01:12,837 And if I can't make it with men, then I'll make it with women. 779 01:01:18,408 --> 01:01:19,710 This is absurd. 780 01:01:19,744 --> 01:01:27,451 * 781 01:01:27,484 --> 01:01:31,188 I think in Women in Revolt, she's just charming, and lovely, 782 01:01:31,221 --> 01:01:35,793 and funny, and, uh, she's a true star. She's a real movie star. 783 01:01:35,826 --> 01:01:38,763 I don't think there's anything that ironic about her. 784 01:01:38,796 --> 01:01:43,200 I think Candy, certainly, uh, you saw something totally wonderful 785 01:01:43,233 --> 01:01:49,740 and likable and good. Enormous identity. Enormous distinction she had: 786 01:01:49,774 --> 01:01:54,178 not just her beautiful appearance, but the attitude and the tone of voice, 787 01:01:54,211 --> 01:01:58,749 and the hard work that went into doing what it was she did. 788 01:01:58,783 --> 01:02:04,755 We're going to invite the chic-est, richest, 789 01:02:04,789 --> 01:02:07,758 prettiest, youngest people 790 01:02:07,792 --> 01:02:09,760 - PIG'S - in Manhattan. 791 01:02:09,794 --> 01:02:12,529 I think Women in Revolt is one of the best Warhol movies. 792 01:02:12,562 --> 01:02:15,766 I think it was originally called P.I.G.S, "Politically Involved Girls", 793 01:02:15,800 --> 01:02:18,535 and I think it was Paul making fun of feminism, but in a weird way, 794 01:02:18,568 --> 01:02:21,772 it is a feminist movie. It's a real feminist movie, 795 01:02:21,806 --> 01:02:24,541 that comes across, I think, very well, politically. 796 01:02:24,574 --> 01:02:27,912 When the women's movement started in New York, 797 01:02:27,945 --> 01:02:35,385 they published this manifesto saying Candy Darling was a threat to women everywhere, 798 01:02:35,419 --> 01:02:37,855 and she should be destroyed. 799 01:02:37,888 --> 01:02:40,891 And Candy thought that it was very funny, but she was scared. 800 01:02:40,925 --> 01:02:43,460 She said "Those bitter lesbians..." 801 01:02:43,493 --> 01:02:44,661 I just remember at the opening, 802 01:02:44,694 --> 01:02:47,798 we had the "WOMEN IN REVOLT" up on the marquee, you know, 803 01:02:47,832 --> 01:02:49,633 the typeface that we had picked out. 804 01:02:49,666 --> 01:02:55,039 It was known as a porn house, and Candy worked the line of the people coming to the premiere, 805 01:02:55,072 --> 01:02:58,042 you know, doing her number down perfectly. 806 01:02:58,075 --> 01:03:01,846 And thinking it was a porn movie, "Women in Revolt", these guys would be walking in, 807 01:03:01,879 --> 01:03:05,482 "hey, we're gonna see something," and it's not what they expected. 808 01:03:05,515 --> 01:03:08,919 What are you, anyways, a he or a she? 809 01:03:08,953 --> 01:03:12,957 I'm young. I wanna be loved. 810 01:03:12,990 --> 01:03:15,893 You've been loved, and you've been loved by me, your own brother. 811 01:03:15,926 --> 01:03:21,465 There's nothing like mass love. My psychiatrist says I need mass love. 812 01:03:21,498 --> 01:03:28,038 The incest... Incest, lesbianism... 813 01:03:28,072 --> 01:03:35,980 Incest, lesbianism: I'm ready for Hollywood, right, Johnny? 814 01:03:36,013 --> 01:03:40,918 We did get an invitation to the first Los Angeles film festival, 815 01:03:40,951 --> 01:03:45,589 with "Women in Revolt", in, I think, '71 or '72, I'm not sure. 816 01:03:45,622 --> 01:03:50,594 So we took Candy - not Jackie and not Holly - 817 01:03:50,627 --> 01:03:55,966 it was obvious that Candy wanted to go to Hollywood, and I sat next to Candy, 818 01:03:56,000 --> 01:03:59,536 in sort of a back row, and at some point she turned to me, and she said, 819 01:03:59,569 --> 01:04:03,073 "You know, Paul, I can't believe what I'm seeing. 820 01:04:03,107 --> 01:04:07,544 I'm here in Hollywood, in Grauman's Chinese Theater, watching myself in a movie, 821 01:04:07,577 --> 01:04:11,515 and the audience is clapping and liking the movie so much." 822 01:04:11,548 --> 01:04:14,451 She said "This is unbelievable to me." 823 01:04:14,484 --> 01:04:22,492 That this dream of hers, to have, uh, to be in a movie, to come to Hollywood, 824 01:04:22,659 --> 01:04:30,000 uh, it was unreal. 825 01:04:33,003 --> 01:04:35,139 Andy Warhol 826 01:04:35,172 --> 01:04:41,511 All I can tell you is, don't get involved with drag queens. It's trouble. 827 01:04:41,545 --> 01:04:42,612 Truman Capote 828 01:04:42,646 --> 01:04:44,949 Candy Darling would make a great mistake 829 01:04:44,982 --> 01:04:47,617 to have that sex change operation. 830 01:04:47,651 --> 01:04:50,054 Oh, she doesn't want one. 831 01:04:50,087 --> 01:04:52,990 You should really write a play for Candy. 832 01:04:53,023 --> 01:04:57,261 She's really a great actress, and there's no chance of her even going anywhere 833 01:04:57,294 --> 01:05:02,266 unless someone important writes something for her. 834 01:05:02,299 --> 01:05:05,135 Tennessee should write a play for her. 835 01:05:05,169 --> 01:05:10,174 She has a certain vulnerability about her that doesn't have anything to do with 836 01:05:10,207 --> 01:05:17,047 whether she's pretty, or not pretty: She has an aura. 837 01:05:17,081 --> 01:05:19,683 We could line up 300 girls who are prettier than Candy in every way, 838 01:05:19,716 --> 01:05:24,021 but they just don't have any aura. 839 01:05:27,724 --> 01:05:31,695 It was Tennessee Williams who finally decided to champion her. 840 01:05:35,065 --> 01:05:39,103 She was so excited about being in Tennessee Williams' play. 841 01:05:39,136 --> 01:05:44,141 She was so happy. I never saw her so happy in my life. 842 01:05:47,744 --> 01:05:53,050 Tennessee Williams didn't suffer fools. I mean, maybe if they were a cute guy. 843 01:05:53,083 --> 01:05:57,321 But they weren't sleeping together. He liked her, plain and simple. 844 01:05:57,354 --> 01:06:01,225 I saw "Small Craft Warnings" and I loved it. 845 01:06:01,258 --> 01:06:07,031 It was at a small theater uptown, and Candy was just heaven, you know. 846 01:06:07,064 --> 01:06:11,035 And it was like, my wonderful acting teacher, Herbert Bergdorf, 847 01:06:11,068 --> 01:06:16,406 said he wants to see an actor go on stage right out of real life, and just continue. 848 01:06:16,440 --> 01:06:21,211 [ROBERT HEIDE]: Candy, uh, after the performance, came out in a white chinchilla coat, 849 01:06:21,245 --> 01:06:24,381 and a big hat, and looked like a Ziegfeld girl. 850 01:06:24,414 --> 01:06:29,353 Walked down the street with Tennessee in his cream-colored Southern suit, 851 01:06:29,386 --> 01:06:32,389 and little hat, and all eyes turned. 852 01:06:34,358 --> 01:06:39,096 It was her first chance to get away from just doing the Warhol stuff. 853 01:06:39,129 --> 01:06:44,201 She was beginning to believe that she, you know, could do a lot of other things. 854 01:06:47,137 --> 01:06:51,241 Did you have any difficulties with Candy playing Violet at all? 855 01:06:56,280 --> 01:07:01,285 How did you feel that Candy related to the other people in the play? 856 01:07:13,297 --> 01:07:16,300 I remember. It was all cluttered and full of junk. 857 01:07:25,309 --> 01:07:32,149 Here Candy gets dangled her dream, which, how could it ever happen? 858 01:07:32,182 --> 01:07:38,555 How could it ever happen that her dream was coming true? 859 01:07:38,588 --> 01:07:41,158 She was with Tennessee Williams. 860 01:07:41,191 --> 01:07:42,292 Tennessee? 861 01:07:42,326 --> 01:07:48,298 Yes, darling? (laughter, conversation) 862 01:07:51,201 --> 01:07:56,206 Thank you for having me in the play. It's wonderful. 863 01:08:03,180 --> 01:08:08,652 And then, all of a sudden, it turned out to be this ephemeral thing. 864 01:08:08,685 --> 01:08:11,221 And the carnival had moved on. 865 01:08:14,524 --> 01:08:22,132 Saturday morning. Four a.m. I have no one. Everyone has left me. 866 01:08:22,166 --> 01:08:28,772 I am alone here tonight, in room 1005 at the Diplomat Hotel. 867 01:08:28,805 --> 01:08:33,643 I was not meant for this world. I don't know. 868 01:08:33,677 --> 01:08:41,685 All I know is, I love, and I am not loved. I do not know happiness. 869 01:08:41,785 --> 01:08:46,590 I know despair, loneliness, and longing. 870 01:08:46,623 --> 01:08:51,461 My biggest problem is I have no man to love me. 871 01:08:51,495 --> 01:08:55,665 So nothing else matters, or makes much of a difference. 872 01:08:55,699 --> 01:09:02,772 "CANDY SAYS" by Lou Reed. * Candy says, 873 01:09:02,806 --> 01:09:08,945 I've come to hate my body, 874 01:09:08,978 --> 01:09:17,187 and all that it requires, in this world. 875 01:09:21,558 --> 01:09:27,264 Candy says, 876 01:09:27,297 --> 01:09:33,303 I'd like to know completely, 877 01:09:33,337 --> 01:09:41,345 what others so discreetly talk about. 878 01:09:45,515 --> 01:09:53,357 I'm going to watch the bluebirds fly, 879 01:09:53,390 --> 01:09:57,327 over my shoulder, 880 01:09:57,361 --> 01:10:04,701 I'm going to watch them pass me by. 881 01:10:04,734 --> 01:10:08,472 Maybe when I'm older 882 01:10:08,505 --> 01:10:13,743 What do you think I'd see, 883 01:10:13,777 --> 01:10:19,783 if I could walk away from me * 884 01:10:21,885 --> 01:10:25,822 Could you pick this up here, and let me see how deep that is? 885 01:10:25,855 --> 01:10:32,862 That's three feet, that's not... that doesn't seem very deep, does it? 886 01:10:34,764 --> 01:10:38,802 I'll be worried that somebody will dig them up. 887 01:10:38,835 --> 01:10:45,875 You know, some fan will come and, you know... 888 01:10:45,909 --> 01:10:50,547 I'm worried that she's not really protected, and that it's not deep enough. 889 01:10:53,583 --> 01:10:55,852 Yeah, hi, this is Jeremiah Newton again. 890 01:10:55,885 --> 01:10:57,687 I just wanted to ask you something. 891 01:10:57,721 --> 01:11:03,627 The funeral is tomorrow, and I'd like them a little deeper. 892 01:11:03,660 --> 01:11:08,665 Yeah, but I really want it a little deeper. I'll dig it myself, you know. 893 01:11:08,698 --> 01:11:14,504 I want to make sure she's OK, if there's a flood or something? I'm just worried about that. 894 01:11:21,345 --> 01:11:25,949 Well, I don't think she expected to die. Or trust me with her legacy. 895 01:11:25,982 --> 01:11:31,988 I just, I thought I stepped up to the plate, because nobody else was going to do it. 896 01:11:34,924 --> 01:11:40,730 I started doing audio interviews with everyone I could, 897 01:11:40,764 --> 01:11:45,802 and I interviewed everyone from Tennessee Williams to Candy's parents. 898 01:11:45,835 --> 01:11:48,938 And I wanted to know more about her through these interviews. 899 01:11:48,972 --> 01:11:54,944 I would play them, and listen to the words. 900 01:11:54,978 --> 01:12:00,884 I stayed in touch with the mother and, uh, we wrote back and forth. 901 01:12:00,917 --> 01:12:02,952 She told me she had remarried. 902 01:12:02,986 --> 01:12:07,824 She married a man who was very, very anti-gay. He hated homosexuals. 903 01:12:07,857 --> 01:12:11,828 He had no idea that there was another child that was now dead, 904 01:12:11,861 --> 01:12:16,866 and if I visit her, promise, don't say anything to anybody. 905 01:12:16,900 --> 01:12:20,837 Well, her husband was away out of town, so I got on the bus - 906 01:12:20,870 --> 01:12:25,442 it was like a 4 or 5 hour bus ride - and the mother met me, 907 01:12:25,475 --> 01:12:29,713 and we really talked about Candy, and her papers and possessions. 908 01:12:29,746 --> 01:12:34,818 Which the mother said, "Go through everything, and take what you want, 909 01:12:34,851 --> 01:12:39,689 and leave the rest, and I'll send them to you next week." 910 01:12:39,723 --> 01:12:41,858 I took as much as I could carry. 911 01:13:13,089 --> 01:13:17,761 * Getting on the bus, the mother gave me her son's ashes, and said 912 01:13:17,794 --> 01:13:22,398 "Take this back to New York, Candy always wanted to be with you." 913 01:13:24,734 --> 01:13:27,737 I never saw the mother again. 914 01:13:31,808 --> 01:13:34,978 And I asked for the rest of the papers and costumes, 915 01:13:35,011 --> 01:13:38,815 and she said that they were all destroyed. She'd burnt them all. 916 01:13:38,848 --> 01:13:43,687 She didn't want her husband to know anything. She was so ashamed of her son. 917 01:13:48,124 --> 01:13:53,162 Candy said, "Jeremiah, you must never leave things behind. 918 01:13:53,196 --> 01:13:55,465 Keep everything, don't lose everything. 919 01:13:55,499 --> 01:14:00,504 If you don't want it, you can keep it at my mother's house. 920 01:14:00,537 --> 01:14:07,176 Don't ever give anything up." She was right. 921 01:14:14,784 --> 01:14:20,957 The Sixties were over everywhere. 922 01:14:20,990 --> 01:14:23,793 Andy wouldn't have continued on in the Sixties mentality 923 01:14:23,827 --> 01:14:28,965 any more than the rest of the world did, least of all Andy. 924 01:14:28,998 --> 01:14:33,036 There was a whole turning point. It was the beginning of yuppies. 925 01:14:33,069 --> 01:14:38,174 I think the baby boom generation turned its focus very much towards hedonism, 926 01:14:38,207 --> 01:14:44,247 consumerism, materialism, and Andy, and "Interview", 927 01:14:44,280 --> 01:14:47,183 and certainly Paul Morrissey, Fred Hughes, they were all, 928 01:14:47,216 --> 01:14:50,086 we were all part of that wave, we weren't resisting that at all. 929 01:14:50,119 --> 01:14:55,258 We were out there trying to sell ads for "Interview" and sell portraits to rich people, 930 01:14:55,291 --> 01:14:57,994 so that "Interview" could exist, actually. 931 01:14:58,027 --> 01:15:01,798 She really believed that Andy was going to take care of her 932 01:15:01,831 --> 01:15:04,901 like Louis B. Mayer. He just wasn't. 933 01:15:04,934 --> 01:15:08,605 And he got kind of - Andy would get tired of people, 934 01:15:08,638 --> 01:15:12,141 and sort of toss them away like Kleenex. 935 01:15:12,175 --> 01:15:16,179 And they already made a movie without her. They made "Heat". 936 01:15:16,212 --> 01:15:19,015 And they didn't even invite her to the opening of it. 937 01:15:19,048 --> 01:15:22,619 'Cause at that time, Andy said "Oh, I don't want to use chicks with dicks anymore, 938 01:15:22,652 --> 01:15:25,555 I want to use real women, that's what Hollywood wants." 939 01:15:25,589 --> 01:15:27,891 So they started making other movies. 940 01:15:47,076 --> 01:15:52,949 She was very unhappy about it. She was very, very unhappy about it. 941 01:15:52,982 --> 01:15:56,653 She didn't like it at all. She didn't know what to do. 942 01:15:57,353 --> 01:16:03,226 One: a beautiful big house in Long Island, and one in California. 943 01:16:03,259 --> 01:16:07,330 Two: Learn languages and sew. 944 01:16:07,363 --> 01:16:11,267 Three: Cabin on Lake Winnipesaukee. 945 01:16:11,300 --> 01:16:18,341 Rug for my room, color TV, fall new clothes, white backless shoes, 946 01:16:18,374 --> 01:16:22,345 hormone treatment, electrolysis. 947 01:16:22,378 --> 01:16:28,284 Dog. Fur coat. Car. New house. 948 01:16:28,317 --> 01:16:35,191 Well, sometime in the future, I may hope to be married. 949 01:16:35,224 --> 01:16:39,228 I mean, I know it might sound ridiculous to my friends, but - 950 01:16:39,262 --> 01:16:39,996 No, it doesn't sound ridiculous. 951 01:16:40,029 --> 01:16:41,364 It doesn't? Oh - 952 01:16:41,397 --> 01:16:43,299 We're with you, behind you, all the way. 953 01:16:43,332 --> 01:16:49,639 Well, um, I mean... 954 01:16:49,673 --> 01:16:52,408 I've already made myself happy. 955 01:16:52,441 --> 01:17:00,283 I mean, because I am in film, and, um, well, there's nothing quite like it. 956 01:17:03,987 --> 01:17:07,957 I feel like I'm living in a prison. 957 01:17:07,991 --> 01:17:11,728 There are so many things I may not experience. 958 01:17:11,761 --> 01:17:16,933 I cannot go swimming, can't visit relatives, 959 01:17:16,966 --> 01:17:23,172 can't get a job, can't have a boyfriend. 960 01:17:23,206 --> 01:17:30,379 I see so much of life I cannot have. I am living in a veritable prison. 961 01:17:32,348 --> 01:17:39,455 What? Are you kidding? 962 01:17:39,488 --> 01:17:46,129 What did I do to you? Well, where will I go? 963 01:17:51,801 --> 01:17:59,008 Okay... Thank you very much for making me wish I were dead. 964 01:18:07,083 --> 01:18:11,054 She said "Put your hand on my tummy," and I put my hand on her tummy, 965 01:18:11,087 --> 01:18:14,290 and it was swollen. Like, you know... 966 01:18:14,323 --> 01:18:17,393 and I said "Whoa, what is this?" She said "I'm pregnant. 967 01:18:17,426 --> 01:18:21,464 God has answered my prayers." 968 01:18:21,497 --> 01:18:25,068 Then she said she was going to the doctors. 969 01:18:25,101 --> 01:18:30,807 And they examined her, and they told her she had a tumor, a huge tumor inside of her. 970 01:18:30,840 --> 01:18:34,343 I didn't believe it. I thought she was making it up. 971 01:18:34,377 --> 01:18:38,447 I was at work, and she called me, and she, "I have a tumor." 972 01:18:38,481 --> 01:18:41,084 I, "Oh come on: a tumor?" 973 01:18:41,117 --> 01:18:45,288 The word "cancer" was never mentioned. 974 01:18:45,321 --> 01:18:48,391 So, uh, off she went into the hospital. 975 01:18:53,863 --> 01:18:57,867 She said more than once, like she was acting in a Susan Hayward movie, 976 01:18:57,901 --> 01:19:00,236 "I don't want to die! I don't want to die!" 977 01:19:00,269 --> 01:19:04,473 But she was saying it in a very, kind of, uh, the way Candy would say it, 978 01:19:04,507 --> 01:19:11,848 as if she was, uh, making fun of, a little bit, Susan Hayward, saying it. 979 01:19:11,881 --> 01:19:17,954 I had the secret feeling that she was enjoying it. 980 01:19:17,987 --> 01:19:21,390 It was another role for her to play. 981 01:19:21,424 --> 01:19:25,361 She was going to play it because she believed it. 982 01:19:25,394 --> 01:19:29,899 And she believed it, this time, because it was true. 983 01:19:29,933 --> 01:19:37,941 Jean Harlow, Marilyn Monroe, they all died young, blonde, and beautiful. 984 01:19:38,374 --> 01:19:43,813 Candy, in a way, wanted to go that route. 985 01:19:53,923 --> 01:19:55,892 Candy had to be what she was. 986 01:19:55,925 --> 01:20:00,930 She, she had to be what she was; she couldn't have been anything else. 987 01:20:00,964 --> 01:20:04,500 And then it was her time to go, and she could die thinking, 988 01:20:04,533 --> 01:20:10,406 "Well, I lived my life the way I thought, and I lived my life the way I felt it." 989 01:20:23,086 --> 01:20:24,921 I went with him when he went up to take that picture. 990 01:20:24,954 --> 01:20:28,191 She asked him to come up and take that picture. 991 01:20:28,224 --> 01:20:36,232 I was kind of horrified at the idea. I said to Peter, "She's dying, she's sick. 992 01:20:36,499 --> 01:20:40,136 Why would she want her picture taken?" 993 01:20:40,169 --> 01:20:44,874 And she loved that picture, and she really made a big effort to look like that, 994 01:20:44,908 --> 01:20:47,176 because she already looked very unwell. She was extremely sick 995 01:20:47,210 --> 01:20:49,412 when that photograph was taken. 996 01:20:58,287 --> 01:21:03,126 I will not cease to be myself for foolish people. 997 01:21:03,159 --> 01:21:08,364 For foolish people make harsh judgments on me. 998 01:21:08,397 --> 01:21:15,271 You must always be yourself, no matter what the price. 999 01:21:15,304 --> 01:21:19,242 It is the highest form of morality. 1000 01:21:19,275 --> 01:21:23,279 * " Candy Says" by Lou Reed 1001 01:21:38,361 --> 01:21:46,369 * Candy says I've come to hate my body, 1002 01:21:47,136 --> 01:21:55,144 and all that it requires in this world 1003 01:21:55,244 --> 01:22:03,186 Candy says I'd like to know completely, 1004 01:22:03,219 --> 01:22:11,227 what others so discreetly talking about 1005 01:22:11,327 --> 01:22:19,335 I'm gonna watch the blue bird fly over my shoulder, 1006 01:22:19,435 --> 01:22:26,042 I'm gonna watch him pass me by 1007 01:22:26,075 --> 01:22:28,444 Maybe when I'm older 1008 01:22:28,477 --> 01:22:36,485 What do you think I'd see, If I could walk away from me 1009 01:22:40,223 --> 01:22:48,231 Candy says I hate the quiet places, 1010 01:22:48,631 --> 01:22:56,639 that cause the smallest taste of what will be 1011 01:22:57,240 --> 01:23:05,248 Candy says I hate the big decisions 1012 01:23:05,781 --> 01:23:11,154 that cause endless revisions in my mind 1013 01:23:11,187 --> 01:23:14,423 That's why I'm doing fine 1014 01:23:14,457 --> 01:23:22,465 Oh, I'm gonna watch the blue bird fly over my shoulder, 1015 01:23:22,798 --> 01:23:28,204 I'm gonna watch it pass me by 1016 01:23:28,237 --> 01:23:31,074 when I'm older. 1017 01:23:31,107 --> 01:23:39,115 What do you think I'd see, if I could walk away from me 1018 01:24:16,119 --> 01:24:24,127 Oh, I'm gonna watch the blue bird fly over my shoulder, 1019 01:24:24,327 --> 01:24:31,167 I'm gonna watch it pass me by 1020 01:24:31,200 --> 01:24:33,269 when I'm older 1021 01:24:33,302 --> 01:24:41,310 What do you think I'd see, if I could walk away from me? 1022 01:24:58,194 --> 01:25:04,133 To whom it may concern: By the time you read this, I will be gone. 1023 01:25:04,167 --> 01:25:09,905 Unfortunately, before my death, I had no desire left for life. 1024 01:25:09,938 --> 01:25:13,676 Even with all my friends, and my career on the upswing, 1025 01:25:13,709 --> 01:25:18,414 I felt too empty to go on in this unreal existence. 1026 01:25:18,447 --> 01:25:25,454 I have arranged my own funeral, with a guest list, and it is paid for. 1027 01:25:25,488 --> 01:25:30,726 I would like to say goodbye to Jackie Curtis: I think you're fabulous. 1028 01:25:30,759 --> 01:25:36,765 Holly, Sam Green, a true friend and noble person. 1029 01:25:36,799 --> 01:25:44,807 Ron Link, I'll never forget you. Andy Warhol: what can I say. 1030 01:25:45,241 --> 01:25:51,714 Paul Morrissey, you know I loved you. Andy, you too. 1031 01:25:51,747 --> 01:25:56,219 Jeremiah, don't take it too badly. Just remember what a bitch I was. 1032 01:25:56,252 --> 01:26:01,390 I guess you saw it coming. I'm better off now. 1033 01:26:01,424 --> 01:26:07,196 Did you know I couldn't last? I always knew it. 1034 01:26:07,230 --> 01:26:11,400 I wish I could meet you all again. Goodbye for now, 1035 01:26:11,434 --> 01:26:14,203 love always, Candy Darling. 92245

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