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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,526 --> 00:00:06,049 "Who is Eckhart Tolle?" 2 00:00:06,223 --> 00:00:08,138 "Who is Eckhart Tolle?!" 3 00:00:08,312 --> 00:00:12,577 Who is Eckhart Tolle? 4 00:00:12,751 --> 00:00:15,798 Only one of the most famous spiritual teachers of our time, 5 00:00:15,972 --> 00:00:18,105 but most importantly, he's Oprah's bestie. 6 00:00:18,279 --> 00:00:21,630 I thought Gayle was Oprah's bestie. 7 00:00:21,804 --> 00:00:24,285 At least, according to the little TV on the gas pump. 8 00:00:24,459 --> 00:00:25,590 Short pants, short pants. 9 00:00:25,764 --> 00:00:28,550 "What are knickerbockers?!" 10 00:00:28,724 --> 00:00:32,293 Don't tell me you're still thinking of going on "Jeopardy!" 11 00:00:32,467 --> 00:00:34,643 It's not the same without Alex Trebek, rest in peace. 12 00:00:34,817 --> 00:00:37,428 No, of course not, but Alex would want it to go on, 13 00:00:37,602 --> 00:00:38,821 and he would want me to go on. 14 00:00:38,995 --> 00:00:40,301 He told me that... 15 00:00:40,475 --> 00:00:42,825 when I was on the hallucinogenic tea. 16 00:00:42,999 --> 00:00:47,134 Oh, well, if the drugs said so, you gotta do it. 17 00:00:47,308 --> 00:00:49,832 Stop trying to neg me, Dan. 18 00:00:50,006 --> 00:00:51,181 "What is Little Big Horn?" 19 00:00:51,355 --> 00:00:54,271 I mean, "Who is Custer?" Dammit, Jackie! 20 00:00:54,445 --> 00:00:57,970 You're going to "the show." Get it together. 21 00:00:58,145 --> 00:01:01,974 Grandpa, can we go to Laser Maxx Family Fun Center this weekend? 22 00:01:02,149 --> 00:01:03,498 They're social distancing. 23 00:01:03,672 --> 00:01:05,456 Oh, money's a little tight right now, honey. 24 00:01:05,630 --> 00:01:08,285 Hey, you want to play laser tag, let's go out in the yard 25 00:01:08,459 --> 00:01:10,853 and I'll chase you around with a flashlight. 26 00:01:14,813 --> 00:01:16,163 Oh! 27 00:01:18,730 --> 00:01:19,992 Hey, man. What's up? 28 00:01:20,167 --> 00:01:21,777 Oh. Nothing. 29 00:01:21,951 --> 00:01:25,998 Just thought I'd drop by and ask you to look out your window. 30 00:01:26,173 --> 00:01:27,783 It's a boat. 31 00:01:27,957 --> 00:01:29,785 Oh, it is a boat. 32 00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:33,745 Your commitment to these practical jokes is impressive. 33 00:01:33,919 --> 00:01:36,052 Uh, it's mine. I just bought it. 34 00:01:36,226 --> 00:01:38,141 It took me a minute to convince Anne-Marie, 35 00:01:38,315 --> 00:01:40,491 but once I got the grandkids to whine 36 00:01:40,665 --> 00:01:44,365 at that pitch that makes her crazy, she gave in. 37 00:01:44,539 --> 00:01:46,062 Good for you. Yeah. 38 00:01:46,236 --> 00:01:48,064 You want some coffee? No, I don't want some coffee. 39 00:01:48,238 --> 00:01:49,413 I-I want you to come look at my boat. 40 00:01:49,587 --> 00:01:51,850 I saw it. You want some coffee or not? 41 00:01:52,024 --> 00:01:53,635 Iwant to go see your boat! 42 00:01:53,809 --> 00:01:55,985 See, that's how you act when someone gets a boat. 43 00:01:57,943 --> 00:02:00,511 Come on. Get excited, man. 44 00:02:00,685 --> 00:02:03,210 We're gonna have a blast this summer on Lake Michigan. 45 00:02:03,384 --> 00:02:04,559 You know, I'm hoping you and Louise 46 00:02:04,733 --> 00:02:06,300 will be able to join us sometime, man. 47 00:02:06,474 --> 00:02:08,476 We can cruise around, drink beer. 48 00:02:08,650 --> 00:02:10,608 Sure. Sounds great. 49 00:02:12,567 --> 00:02:14,656 Kind of ironic, isn't it? 50 00:02:14,830 --> 00:02:16,266 What do you mean? 51 00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:18,573 No, I mean, it just goes to show you. 52 00:02:18,747 --> 00:02:21,271 Just goes to show you what? 53 00:02:21,445 --> 00:02:24,405 Well, it's funny how I'm the one that gave you a job, 54 00:02:24,579 --> 00:02:26,102 made you a partner in my business, 55 00:02:26,276 --> 00:02:29,845 and now you have a boat and I don't. 56 00:02:31,020 --> 00:02:32,195 What are you, uh... 57 00:02:32,369 --> 00:02:33,936 You saying I shouldn't have a boat? 58 00:02:34,110 --> 00:02:36,678 No, no, no. I'm not saying you shouldn't have a boat. 59 00:02:38,201 --> 00:02:42,205 I'm just saying I probably should have had a boat first. 60 00:02:42,379 --> 00:02:46,078 You know what, Dan, you're right. 61 00:02:46,253 --> 00:02:49,169 How dare I have a boat before you? 62 00:02:49,343 --> 00:02:50,692 Come on, I didn't mean it like that. 63 00:02:50,866 --> 00:02:51,867 Oh, yes, you did. 64 00:02:52,041 --> 00:02:53,695 You just didn't know you did. 65 00:02:53,869 --> 00:02:57,220 You know, I'll try and remember to stay a step below you, Dan. 66 00:02:57,394 --> 00:02:59,918 What are you getting so worked up about? 67 00:03:00,092 --> 00:03:02,182 I told you I like your stupid boat. 68 00:03:02,356 --> 00:03:03,661 Now sit down and have some coffee. 69 00:03:03,835 --> 00:03:05,185 Oh, don't tell me what to do. 70 00:03:05,359 --> 00:03:07,230 I don't even know why I came over here. 71 00:03:45,399 --> 00:03:48,228 --Captions by VITAC-- 72 00:03:49,968 --> 00:03:51,318 Wow. 73 00:03:51,492 --> 00:03:53,450 I can't believe I have my own office. 74 00:03:53,624 --> 00:03:54,973 Well, if it's too much for you, 75 00:03:55,147 --> 00:03:56,758 we can always get you a milk crate and a stool. 76 00:03:56,932 --> 00:03:58,499 No, no. No. 77 00:03:58,673 --> 00:04:01,023 I-It's weird, but it's kinda cool. 78 00:04:01,197 --> 00:04:04,940 In the meantime, I've, uh, set up some interviews for you 79 00:04:05,114 --> 00:04:07,029 so you can hire an assistant. 80 00:04:07,203 --> 00:04:08,335 An assistant? 81 00:04:08,509 --> 00:04:09,727 Uh, I'm pretty much the kind of person 82 00:04:09,901 --> 00:04:11,555 that likes to do everything by myself. 83 00:04:11,729 --> 00:04:13,470 Just ask my boyfriend how I am in bed. 84 00:04:13,644 --> 00:04:16,212 I did. He said you need an assistant. 85 00:04:18,170 --> 00:04:19,302 You were 10 minutes late today. 86 00:04:19,476 --> 00:04:21,261 I was 15 minutes late yesterday. 87 00:04:21,435 --> 00:04:24,220 How 'bout an 'atta girl? 88 00:04:26,744 --> 00:04:31,227 So, this is what it's like living inside Robin's butt. 89 00:04:31,401 --> 00:04:33,229 Where do you keep the stick? 90 00:04:33,403 --> 00:04:35,231 Okay, did you come here just to torment me? 91 00:04:35,405 --> 00:04:36,754 Mostly. 92 00:04:36,928 --> 00:04:39,061 But I'm also here on Union Steward business. 93 00:04:39,235 --> 00:04:41,411 The time clock is five minutes off, 94 00:04:41,585 --> 00:04:44,458 so we're getting written up for coming in late. 95 00:04:44,632 --> 00:04:47,199 Maybe you people up here could put down your caviar spoons 96 00:04:47,374 --> 00:04:49,550 for a minute and come down and fix it. 97 00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:51,856 Okay, okay. I'll -- I'll look into it. 98 00:04:52,030 --> 00:04:53,293 Now beat it. 99 00:04:53,467 --> 00:04:54,903 I gotta interview some assistants. 100 00:04:55,077 --> 00:04:56,339 You know, in an interview, 101 00:04:56,513 --> 00:04:58,428 you have to pretend to listen to people. 102 00:04:58,602 --> 00:05:02,911 All I have to do is look in their eyes, nod periodically, 103 00:05:03,085 --> 00:05:06,088 and then, you know, there's the smiling. 104 00:05:06,262 --> 00:05:08,743 And that's how the Joker became the Joker. 105 00:05:13,008 --> 00:05:14,226 Hmm. 106 00:05:14,401 --> 00:05:15,793 Yeah. 107 00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:22,104 Couldn't hold me down, could you, Lanford? 108 00:05:22,278 --> 00:05:24,236 Who's the bitch now? 109 00:05:24,411 --> 00:05:25,629 Excuse me? 110 00:05:25,803 --> 00:05:27,457 Oh. I'm here for the interview? 111 00:05:27,631 --> 00:05:29,633 Oh, my God. Hi. I'm so sorry. 112 00:05:29,807 --> 00:05:31,853 I'm Darlene Conner. First question -- 113 00:05:32,027 --> 00:05:34,116 you still want to work for me after hearing that? 114 00:05:34,290 --> 00:05:35,987 No worries. My last boss 115 00:05:36,161 --> 00:05:38,773 shot a champagne cork out his window and killed a bird. 116 00:05:38,947 --> 00:05:40,557 Um... 117 00:05:40,731 --> 00:05:42,429 Okay. 118 00:05:42,603 --> 00:05:44,431 Where should we start? 119 00:05:44,605 --> 00:05:45,780 Can I sit down? 120 00:05:45,954 --> 00:05:48,086 Oh, my God. Yes. Please sit down. 121 00:05:53,048 --> 00:05:56,268 So...um... 122 00:05:57,879 --> 00:05:59,446 I'm interested in you. 123 00:05:59,620 --> 00:06:00,969 Oh. 124 00:06:01,143 --> 00:06:02,797 Uh, what's that you got in your hand? 125 00:06:02,971 --> 00:06:04,538 Oh, this is just a little rabbit's foot 126 00:06:04,712 --> 00:06:06,278 my daughter Ruthie gave me. 127 00:06:06,453 --> 00:06:08,803 If I get this job, she can get her own computer. 128 00:06:08,977 --> 00:06:10,152 She's been using the computer 129 00:06:10,326 --> 00:06:12,067 at the halfway house down the block, 130 00:06:12,241 --> 00:06:13,808 but I'm really not comfortable with her asking the junkies 131 00:06:13,982 --> 00:06:16,463 how to spell things. 132 00:06:18,029 --> 00:06:19,509 You're hired. 133 00:06:19,683 --> 00:06:21,424 Whoa. Really? 134 00:06:21,598 --> 00:06:23,165 No other questions? 135 00:06:23,339 --> 00:06:25,994 Oh, God, no. I wouldn't put either one of us through that. 136 00:06:26,168 --> 00:06:28,300 Thank you so much! Oh, this is gonna be great. Yeah. 137 00:06:28,475 --> 00:06:31,086 Okay. Oh. What do you usually wear to work? 138 00:06:31,260 --> 00:06:32,609 Um...I don't know. 139 00:06:32,783 --> 00:06:34,176 Something kind of like what I'm wearing today. 140 00:06:34,350 --> 00:06:35,307 Why? 141 00:06:35,482 --> 00:06:37,701 Let me just take a quick photo. 142 00:06:37,875 --> 00:06:39,660 That way, I can be sure we coordinate. 143 00:06:39,834 --> 00:06:41,966 I want people to know I belong to you. 144 00:06:42,140 --> 00:06:43,533 Mm! 145 00:06:47,972 --> 00:06:51,236 You always get the last laugh, don't you, Lanford? 146 00:06:55,066 --> 00:06:56,503 I don't know what you're trying to flatten, 147 00:06:56,677 --> 00:06:58,766 but it must be pretty curled to need all those books. 148 00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:01,943 Well, I realized that there are some "Jeopardy!" categories 149 00:07:02,117 --> 00:07:03,335 I'm not as strong in, 150 00:07:03,510 --> 00:07:05,207 so I'm trying to memorize history. 151 00:07:05,381 --> 00:07:06,774 Which part? 152 00:07:06,948 --> 00:07:08,384 Human. 153 00:07:09,907 --> 00:07:11,256 Hey, can I come in? 154 00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:13,215 I've been tested for all sorts of things, 155 00:07:13,389 --> 00:07:15,783 but the COVID one is good. 156 00:07:15,957 --> 00:07:16,914 Sure. 157 00:07:17,088 --> 00:07:19,439 Alright. 158 00:07:19,613 --> 00:07:20,570 Jackie. 159 00:07:20,744 --> 00:07:22,659 Dwight. 160 00:07:22,833 --> 00:07:25,009 Chuck asked me to drop this off. 161 00:07:25,183 --> 00:07:26,054 What's in it? 162 00:07:26,228 --> 00:07:27,795 It's a bill. 163 00:07:27,969 --> 00:07:29,536 Chuck is officially breaking up the partnership, 164 00:07:29,710 --> 00:07:30,928 and he assumes you're gonna keep 165 00:07:31,102 --> 00:07:32,408 all the equipment you guys bought, 166 00:07:32,582 --> 00:07:34,715 so he wants to be reimbursed for half. 167 00:07:34,889 --> 00:07:36,151 Chuck's breaking up your partnership? 168 00:07:36,325 --> 00:07:37,631 What happened? 169 00:07:37,805 --> 00:07:39,589 I didn't do cartwheels over his dumbass boat 170 00:07:39,763 --> 00:07:41,635 and he lost his mind about it. 171 00:07:41,809 --> 00:07:43,854 He knows I'm struggling to hang onto my house 172 00:07:44,028 --> 00:07:46,509 and he pulls a boat into my driveway? 173 00:07:46,683 --> 00:07:47,989 Might as well park it in my be-hind 174 00:07:48,163 --> 00:07:50,905 and call it the "S.S. Take That." 175 00:07:51,079 --> 00:07:54,038 You know what would show Chuck a thing or two 176 00:07:54,212 --> 00:07:56,171 is if you got yourself a new partner. 177 00:07:56,345 --> 00:07:59,217 An attractive, young one. 178 00:07:59,391 --> 00:08:01,568 I'm done with partners. 179 00:08:01,742 --> 00:08:04,266 Okay. So we're negotiating. 180 00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:06,094 You're offering me nothing. 181 00:08:06,268 --> 00:08:08,009 I will take a silent partnership 182 00:08:08,183 --> 00:08:09,358 and I'll work for minimum wage. 183 00:08:09,532 --> 00:08:10,751 Final offer. 184 00:08:10,925 --> 00:08:12,535 That's less than I pay you now. 185 00:08:12,709 --> 00:08:14,929 Yes, but I'm a partner. 186 00:08:15,103 --> 00:08:18,280 Sounds way better on Farmers Only. 187 00:08:18,454 --> 00:08:20,717 You city girls don't know what you want. 188 00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:24,329 Anything you want me to pass on to Chuck? 189 00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:25,766 Oh, yeah. 190 00:08:25,940 --> 00:08:27,202 Yeah, you can tell him I'll get him his money 191 00:08:27,376 --> 00:08:29,857 when I'm damn good and ready! 192 00:08:32,207 --> 00:08:34,209 Okay. I'll give him the message. 193 00:08:34,383 --> 00:08:37,647 But I don't think I can replicate your ferocity. 194 00:08:43,827 --> 00:08:46,830 Lisa, can you print the latest production reports 195 00:08:47,004 --> 00:08:48,310 and put them on my desk, please? 196 00:08:48,484 --> 00:08:50,312 Sure. Oh! Hey, boss? 197 00:08:50,486 --> 00:08:51,966 Do you want me to get Ruthie on her new computer 198 00:08:52,140 --> 00:08:54,490 so she can say thank you to her Auntie Darlene? 199 00:08:54,664 --> 00:08:57,145 Aww, that's sweet, but no. 200 00:08:57,319 --> 00:09:01,105 Uh, and I'm not really comfortable with Auntie Darlene. 201 00:09:01,279 --> 00:09:02,585 Let's start with Ms. Conner 202 00:09:02,759 --> 00:09:04,805 and see where it goes after five or six years. 203 00:09:08,156 --> 00:09:10,027 Darlene Conner's office. 204 00:09:11,333 --> 00:09:13,770 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 205 00:09:13,944 --> 00:09:15,685 It's Ginette from Sales. 206 00:09:23,519 --> 00:09:25,652 Hey, Ginette. 207 00:09:29,264 --> 00:09:30,526 Uh...I-I'm sorry. 208 00:09:30,700 --> 00:09:32,615 Let me put you on hold for a second. 209 00:09:32,789 --> 00:09:34,617 Why is Ginette screaming at me? 210 00:09:34,791 --> 00:09:37,838 She just called me something I only hear in Tarantino films. 211 00:09:38,012 --> 00:09:39,579 Oh. Right. 212 00:09:39,753 --> 00:09:41,537 You know, she called earlier 213 00:09:41,711 --> 00:09:43,583 saying there's a lot of orders coming in 214 00:09:43,757 --> 00:09:45,193 and that you need to get on your people 215 00:09:45,367 --> 00:09:47,238 to increase their output. 216 00:09:47,412 --> 00:09:48,849 I told her that you said 217 00:09:49,023 --> 00:09:51,025 your people are working as fast as they can 218 00:09:51,199 --> 00:09:52,635 and to get off your back 219 00:09:52,809 --> 00:09:56,117 or you'll come down there and kick her ass. 220 00:09:56,291 --> 00:09:58,162 What? Why would you do that? 221 00:09:58,336 --> 00:10:00,077 Ginette's just trying to push you around 222 00:10:00,251 --> 00:10:01,862 because you're a new boss. 223 00:10:02,036 --> 00:10:05,343 You need to shank someone right away to get respect. 224 00:10:05,517 --> 00:10:07,519 Ginette? 225 00:10:07,694 --> 00:10:11,915 Ginette. 226 00:10:12,089 --> 00:10:14,135 Look, why don't I come down to your office 227 00:10:14,309 --> 00:10:16,659 and we can hash this out, okay? 228 00:10:18,356 --> 00:10:20,097 Alright, we've got a problem. 229 00:10:20,271 --> 00:10:21,838 Are you mad at me? 230 00:10:22,012 --> 00:10:23,710 No. 231 00:10:23,884 --> 00:10:25,625 No, this is your first day, 232 00:10:25,799 --> 00:10:27,365 and I should have made it clear 233 00:10:27,539 --> 00:10:30,238 that you shouldn't threaten department heads on my behalf. 234 00:10:30,412 --> 00:10:32,980 Well, that would've helped. 235 00:10:33,154 --> 00:10:34,764 My bad. 236 00:10:38,333 --> 00:10:39,726 Oh, my God! "Twilight"! 237 00:10:39,900 --> 00:10:41,292 I want to see this. 238 00:10:41,466 --> 00:10:43,077 Mary, it's way past your bedtime. 239 00:10:43,251 --> 00:10:44,992 What are you doing up? 240 00:10:45,166 --> 00:10:46,820 It's hard to sleep with all that's going on in the world. 241 00:10:46,994 --> 00:10:48,604 Shh. 242 00:10:51,085 --> 00:10:52,303 You know what, Josh? 243 00:10:52,477 --> 00:10:54,262 I've seen this movie so many times. 244 00:10:54,436 --> 00:10:57,439 What I really want to watch right now is C-SPAN. Mm. 245 00:10:58,962 --> 00:11:03,575 Next order of business, item number 1742. 246 00:11:05,273 --> 00:11:07,928 Does Josh know that mental illness runs in our family? 247 00:11:08,102 --> 00:11:10,104 It's not mental illness. 248 00:11:10,278 --> 00:11:14,108 It's, uh -- It's uh, drug abuse, alcoholism, and poor diet. 249 00:11:19,243 --> 00:11:20,680 You're rich, right, Josh? 250 00:11:20,854 --> 00:11:22,856 Are you going to give Harris some of that money? 251 00:11:23,030 --> 00:11:24,814 Let's go. 252 00:11:32,256 --> 00:11:33,518 "Twilight"? 253 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:35,303 That's a tricky one for a girl your age. 254 00:11:35,477 --> 00:11:36,826 They're in love, but he wants to suck her blood out 255 00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:38,262 and kill her. 256 00:11:38,436 --> 00:11:40,700 Remember, you deserve better than that. 257 00:11:43,790 --> 00:11:45,792 Have you talked to Chuck yet? 258 00:11:45,966 --> 00:11:47,576 No point. 259 00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:50,100 I'm writing up a custody agreement about our equipment. 260 00:11:50,274 --> 00:11:52,494 I figure we could do every other week. 261 00:11:52,668 --> 00:11:53,930 The important thing is that 262 00:11:54,104 --> 00:11:56,846 the tools don't think it's their fault. 263 00:11:57,020 --> 00:11:59,501 You guys have known each other for over 40 years. 264 00:11:59,675 --> 00:12:03,287 You're really gonna throw this relationship away over a boat? 265 00:12:03,461 --> 00:12:04,680 I'll make new friends. 266 00:12:04,854 --> 00:12:08,031 No, you won't. You're very unpleasant. 267 00:12:08,205 --> 00:12:09,816 Okay, maybe I was a little jealous, 268 00:12:09,990 --> 00:12:11,339 but he's the one that blew the whole thing up. 269 00:12:11,513 --> 00:12:14,908 Come on, Dan. He's your best friend. 270 00:12:15,082 --> 00:12:16,953 If something good happened to you -- 271 00:12:17,127 --> 00:12:19,434 not that it's ever going to -- who would you call? 272 00:12:20,565 --> 00:12:22,611 When Roseanne went into labor with Becky, 273 00:12:22,785 --> 00:12:24,874 who was the first person at the hospital? 274 00:12:25,048 --> 00:12:26,223 Chuck. 275 00:12:26,397 --> 00:12:27,616 But he only beat me there 276 00:12:27,790 --> 00:12:29,270 because the place he was drinking 277 00:12:29,444 --> 00:12:31,359 was closer to the hospital than the place I was drinking. 278 00:12:31,533 --> 00:12:36,190 And...who'd you call first when Roseanne died? 279 00:12:38,235 --> 00:12:40,934 You should just call him. 280 00:12:43,675 --> 00:12:45,765 Oh, wait a minute. 281 00:12:45,939 --> 00:12:48,898 Oh, maybe we can get our own damn boat 282 00:12:49,072 --> 00:12:52,815 because I just made the "Jeopardy!" audition phase! 283 00:12:52,989 --> 00:12:55,600 Talk to Chuck or not, I don't care. 284 00:13:02,869 --> 00:13:05,480 So, not only did you not fix the clock, 285 00:13:05,654 --> 00:13:07,699 but now we can't make eye contact with you 286 00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:09,136 in the hallway?! 287 00:13:09,310 --> 00:13:11,573 What? 288 00:13:12,704 --> 00:13:14,054 Oh, my God. 289 00:13:14,228 --> 00:13:16,143 This wasn't me -- this was Lisa. 290 00:13:16,317 --> 00:13:17,666 I mean, I kinda like the concept, 291 00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:19,755 but it's not appropriate. 292 00:13:19,929 --> 00:13:21,539 This woman is out of control. 293 00:13:21,713 --> 00:13:24,847 Well, you did ask her one whole question in the interview. 294 00:13:25,021 --> 00:13:26,806 What more could you do? 295 00:13:26,980 --> 00:13:28,764 Well, I only needed one question, 296 00:13:28,938 --> 00:13:30,897 but it should have been, "Are you insane?" 297 00:13:31,071 --> 00:13:32,420 You gotta fire her. 298 00:13:32,594 --> 00:13:34,030 No, no. 299 00:13:34,204 --> 00:13:35,771 That's what our bosses always have done to us, 300 00:13:35,945 --> 00:13:38,208 and we always complained that we didn't get a second chance. 301 00:13:38,382 --> 00:13:41,429 When I got fired in Chicago, it literally killed me. 302 00:13:41,603 --> 00:13:43,431 I came home, I cried to Mom, 303 00:13:43,605 --> 00:13:45,302 and I didn't even know how to move forward. 304 00:13:45,476 --> 00:13:47,652 I'm not gonna do that to somebody else. 305 00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:50,394 Okay, can I do it? 306 00:13:50,568 --> 00:13:51,743 No. 307 00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:53,571 I've got to step up and be a boss. 308 00:13:53,745 --> 00:13:56,139 I'll be her mentor the way Robin mentored me. 309 00:13:56,313 --> 00:13:59,142 But let's be honest, how good of a job did Robin really do? 310 00:13:59,316 --> 00:14:01,275 I mean, look at you. You're a mess. 311 00:14:01,449 --> 00:14:02,624 No, I'm not. 312 00:14:02,798 --> 00:14:04,931 I'm forging my own management style. 313 00:14:05,105 --> 00:14:07,063 It's a mix of conflict avoidance, 314 00:14:07,237 --> 00:14:09,631 blue-collar guilt, with a dash of IBS. 315 00:14:09,805 --> 00:14:11,589 Chef's kiss. 316 00:14:15,724 --> 00:14:18,118 Boy, this really is a nice boat. 317 00:14:18,292 --> 00:14:21,164 I took the ferry to Muskegon one time. 318 00:14:21,338 --> 00:14:25,516 I didn't experience the pure joy of boating... 319 00:14:25,690 --> 00:14:29,477 because I was in my truck eating a cheeseburger. 320 00:14:29,651 --> 00:14:30,957 What do you want, Dan? 321 00:14:31,131 --> 00:14:32,872 Permission to come aboard? 322 00:14:34,090 --> 00:14:36,397 Suit yourself. 323 00:14:38,573 --> 00:14:40,444 Look... 324 00:14:40,618 --> 00:14:43,186 I'm sorry I didn't jump up and down about the boat, 325 00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:45,493 but you know what kind of money troubles I got. 326 00:14:45,667 --> 00:14:48,365 I guess it felt like you were... 327 00:14:48,539 --> 00:14:50,498 shoving the thing in my face. 328 00:14:50,672 --> 00:14:53,675 Oh. But you know me better than that, Dan. 329 00:14:53,849 --> 00:14:56,112 I just wanted you to be happy for me -- that's all. 330 00:14:56,286 --> 00:14:57,984 Part of me was, 331 00:14:58,158 --> 00:15:01,117 but part of me was mad at myself that I didn't get one, too. 332 00:15:01,291 --> 00:15:04,294 Hey, it's not my fault that you suck at money. 333 00:15:04,468 --> 00:15:08,037 You couldn't hold onto a dollar bill if it had a handle. 334 00:15:08,211 --> 00:15:09,604 Look, neither one of us had a lot. 335 00:15:09,778 --> 00:15:11,998 The difference was that I put away 20 bucks a week 336 00:15:12,172 --> 00:15:13,869 for 40 years. 337 00:15:15,305 --> 00:15:16,480 Yeah. 338 00:15:16,654 --> 00:15:18,221 But I bet you never had the joy of 339 00:15:18,395 --> 00:15:20,441 blowing your entire paycheck at the state fair 340 00:15:20,615 --> 00:15:24,010 on things that aren't supposed to be fried but are. 341 00:15:24,184 --> 00:15:25,968 I'm a Black man. 342 00:15:26,142 --> 00:15:29,058 I got fried all day every day at home. 343 00:15:29,232 --> 00:15:31,582 Look, I get why you were pissed at me, 344 00:15:31,756 --> 00:15:34,977 but I don't know why you had to bust up the business. 345 00:15:35,151 --> 00:15:38,807 Look, because you were going on and on about doing me a favor 346 00:15:38,981 --> 00:15:42,419 for bringing me onto your crew and making me your partner. 347 00:15:42,593 --> 00:15:44,204 You think that stuff happened 348 00:15:44,378 --> 00:15:45,727 because I couldn't do it on my own? 349 00:15:45,901 --> 00:15:47,250 I didn't say that. 350 00:15:47,424 --> 00:15:49,165 Well, I couldn't. 351 00:15:49,339 --> 00:15:52,429 Because I'm Black and you're white. 352 00:15:52,603 --> 00:15:54,388 What does that have to do with anything? 353 00:15:54,562 --> 00:15:55,824 Are you kidding? 354 00:15:55,998 --> 00:15:57,304 Lanford in those days? 355 00:15:57,478 --> 00:15:58,958 A Black man running a construction company 356 00:15:59,132 --> 00:16:00,960 wasn't gonna happen. 357 00:16:01,134 --> 00:16:03,658 I couldn't get a lumber yard to give me credit. 358 00:16:03,832 --> 00:16:06,139 I couldn't get a loan from a bank. 359 00:16:06,313 --> 00:16:07,749 And there were plenty of white customers 360 00:16:07,923 --> 00:16:10,099 that wouldn't trust me with their business. 361 00:16:10,273 --> 00:16:12,493 You never talked to me about this. 362 00:16:12,667 --> 00:16:14,364 Come on, man. 363 00:16:14,538 --> 00:16:16,062 You've been in the world. 364 00:16:16,236 --> 00:16:19,587 Even if I told you, you don't live it. 365 00:16:19,761 --> 00:16:22,590 You wouldn't understand. 366 00:16:22,764 --> 00:16:25,462 Look -- Look, don't get me wrong. 367 00:16:25,636 --> 00:16:27,377 I appreciate the job and the fact that 368 00:16:27,551 --> 00:16:31,642 your giant, pale, puffy face helped me get my boat. 369 00:16:31,816 --> 00:16:34,428 Well, sometimes behind a giant, white face 370 00:16:34,602 --> 00:16:37,257 is somebody that wants the best for you. 371 00:16:37,431 --> 00:16:40,477 I hope you learned a little bit about race here today. 372 00:16:41,913 --> 00:16:43,654 Screw you, old man. 373 00:16:47,832 --> 00:16:50,183 And just so you know, 374 00:16:50,357 --> 00:16:51,445 when I hired you, 375 00:16:51,619 --> 00:16:53,882 I thought I was hiring a friend. 376 00:16:54,056 --> 00:16:55,840 No, we weren't damn friends. 377 00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:58,278 I did what I had to do to get by. 378 00:16:58,452 --> 00:17:02,412 And it turned out that you were a -- you were a good guy. 379 00:17:02,586 --> 00:17:06,460 So, hell yeah, nowwe're damn friends. 380 00:17:06,634 --> 00:17:08,766 You're like a 14-year-old girl, Dan. 381 00:17:08,940 --> 00:17:12,509 I'll get you a friendship bracelet. 382 00:17:12,683 --> 00:17:14,946 I want the kind where we each get half a heart. 383 00:17:16,818 --> 00:17:18,428 Hey, what do you say we tear up this custody agreement, 384 00:17:18,602 --> 00:17:20,735 get back to work, huh? 385 00:17:20,909 --> 00:17:22,476 Yeah, well, uh... 386 00:17:22,650 --> 00:17:26,132 I've been thinking about that lately, Dan. 387 00:17:26,306 --> 00:17:27,959 I'm tired. 388 00:17:28,134 --> 00:17:31,572 I've decided I'm gonna retire. 389 00:17:31,746 --> 00:17:32,964 What? 390 00:17:33,139 --> 00:17:34,749 I-I-I don't want to work anymore. 391 00:17:34,923 --> 00:17:36,577 I want to enjoy my life. 392 00:17:36,751 --> 00:17:38,187 Why would you want to enjoy your life 393 00:17:38,361 --> 00:17:41,147 when you can work yourself to death with me? 394 00:17:41,321 --> 00:17:43,192 I'm sorry, Dan. 395 00:17:43,366 --> 00:17:46,326 Oh, don't be. I get it. 396 00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:48,545 Ah. 397 00:17:48,719 --> 00:17:50,678 We should celebrate. 398 00:17:50,852 --> 00:17:53,289 Too bad you ain't got no beer on this boat. 399 00:17:53,463 --> 00:17:55,117 Oh, lift up the seat cushion. 400 00:17:55,291 --> 00:17:56,118 Which one? 401 00:17:56,292 --> 00:17:57,380 Any one. 402 00:17:59,991 --> 00:18:01,950 Ta-da! Whoo! 403 00:18:02,124 --> 00:18:05,127 Oh, this is so great. 404 00:18:05,301 --> 00:18:07,521 I want to do this with all my furniture. 405 00:18:13,570 --> 00:18:15,572 Hey, Darlene. 406 00:18:15,746 --> 00:18:17,357 Look who knows where you live. 407 00:18:17,531 --> 00:18:18,662 Oh. 408 00:18:18,836 --> 00:18:20,316 I'm so sorry, 409 00:18:20,490 --> 00:18:21,970 but I wanted to prepare you before you got to work. 410 00:18:22,144 --> 00:18:23,580 I tried to move your parking spot 411 00:18:23,754 --> 00:18:25,756 to the front of the building by saying you had rickets. 412 00:18:25,930 --> 00:18:27,323 Now they're asking for a doctor's note, 413 00:18:27,497 --> 00:18:29,717 so we're gonna have to figure something out. 414 00:18:29,891 --> 00:18:32,285 Okay, sit down. We need to talk. 415 00:18:32,459 --> 00:18:33,895 I was just gonna shoot you a text, 416 00:18:34,069 --> 00:18:35,157 but I didn't want you to freak out, 417 00:18:35,331 --> 00:18:36,115 'cause you know how you do. 418 00:18:40,684 --> 00:18:42,077 What are you doing, Becky? 419 00:18:42,251 --> 00:18:44,471 As the Union Steward, I feel I should be here 420 00:18:44,645 --> 00:18:47,300 to protect the interests of this employee. 421 00:18:47,474 --> 00:18:48,170 You can't stay. 422 00:18:48,344 --> 00:18:49,737 Fine. 423 00:18:49,911 --> 00:18:51,434 Good luck with everything. 424 00:18:51,608 --> 00:18:53,523 I don't need luck. I let my work do the talking. 425 00:18:53,697 --> 00:18:57,136 Okay. 426 00:18:57,310 --> 00:19:00,139 Listen, here's the thing. 427 00:19:00,313 --> 00:19:02,750 You've been messing up a lot, 428 00:19:02,924 --> 00:19:05,796 but I'm gonna be the kind of boss I wish I'd had, 429 00:19:05,970 --> 00:19:07,233 so instead of firing you, 430 00:19:07,407 --> 00:19:09,148 I'm gonna give you one warning. 431 00:19:09,322 --> 00:19:11,150 Let me stop you right there. 432 00:19:11,324 --> 00:19:13,804 My job is to protect you. 433 00:19:13,978 --> 00:19:16,067 I'm the Doberman that's going to protect 434 00:19:16,242 --> 00:19:19,506 the junkyard that is Darlene Conner. 435 00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:23,118 Okay, I'm gonna give you an extra warning. 436 00:19:23,292 --> 00:19:25,076 Thank you so much. If you had fired me, 437 00:19:25,251 --> 00:19:27,122 I don't know what I would have told Janie. 438 00:19:27,296 --> 00:19:28,732 Who's Janie? 439 00:19:28,906 --> 00:19:30,473 My daughter. 440 00:19:30,647 --> 00:19:33,433 Part of being a good manager is remember people's names. 441 00:19:33,607 --> 00:19:35,130 This is why you need me. 442 00:19:35,304 --> 00:19:37,437 Your daughter's name is Ruthie. 443 00:19:37,611 --> 00:19:40,048 Oh, I did say that. Oops. 444 00:19:40,222 --> 00:19:41,745 I made her up to get the job. 445 00:19:41,919 --> 00:19:43,617 This is another reason why you need me. 446 00:19:43,791 --> 00:19:46,054 You're gullible. 447 00:19:46,228 --> 00:19:47,882 Okay, you're fired. 448 00:19:48,056 --> 00:19:49,710 What?! 449 00:19:49,884 --> 00:19:51,625 Look, a-as someone who considered being your mentor, 450 00:19:51,799 --> 00:19:53,540 you should know there's something missing 451 00:19:53,714 --> 00:19:55,455 or broken in your head. 452 00:19:55,629 --> 00:19:59,023 I can't have another firing on my résumé. 453 00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:01,461 I was unemployed for months before this. 454 00:20:01,635 --> 00:20:05,813 Look, I've been there, and it is gonna work out. 455 00:20:05,987 --> 00:20:07,641 How? 456 00:20:07,815 --> 00:20:09,599 How am I going to pay my bills? 457 00:20:09,773 --> 00:20:11,645 Well, that's a good point. 458 00:20:11,819 --> 00:20:13,647 But you don't have a kid anymore, 459 00:20:13,821 --> 00:20:14,996 so that'll save you money. 460 00:20:15,170 --> 00:20:17,564 Can you still be my mentor? 461 00:20:20,175 --> 00:20:23,352 I think that might be hard since you'll have a new job 462 00:20:23,526 --> 00:20:25,702 and also you won't be allowed in our building anymore, 463 00:20:25,876 --> 00:20:27,922 'cause that's my next call. 464 00:20:30,838 --> 00:20:32,405 So, I'm super easy to work for, 465 00:20:32,579 --> 00:20:34,145 and I guess I just have one question -- 466 00:20:34,320 --> 00:20:36,104 you're not gonna love me too much 467 00:20:36,278 --> 00:20:37,845 and do weird things, are you? 468 00:20:38,019 --> 00:20:39,586 Oh, no. 469 00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:42,023 You're an atheist and full of the devil. 470 00:20:42,197 --> 00:20:45,592 I have to pray to God every time I leave your presence. 471 00:20:45,766 --> 00:20:48,334 Perfect. We're gonna get along just fine. 472 00:20:48,508 --> 00:20:52,294 Oh. And here is a picture of Lisa. 473 00:20:52,468 --> 00:20:55,297 One of your jobs is to keep her away from me. 474 00:20:55,471 --> 00:20:58,039 How permanently do you want me to do that? 475 00:20:58,213 --> 00:20:59,823 What do you mean? 476 00:20:59,997 --> 00:21:04,872 Well, the hand of God will smite thine enemies for 250 bucks. 477 00:21:05,046 --> 00:21:08,528 Are you talking about 250 bucks for a hitman? 478 00:21:08,702 --> 00:21:11,095 No. That would be wrong. 479 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:13,750 It's a contribution to my prayer circle. 480 00:21:13,924 --> 00:21:16,492 It worked for my friend with the abusive husband. 481 00:21:16,666 --> 00:21:18,581 He fell in the shower. 482 00:21:22,846 --> 00:21:25,153 Um, well, I only have a couple more people to interview, 483 00:21:25,327 --> 00:21:27,416 but I think this went well. 33298

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