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1
00:01:57,163 --> 00:02:01,042
Good morning. Is it Alice?
Julie Pirelli from Rush & Butcher.
2
00:02:01,123 --> 00:02:03,557
My first appointment fell through so...
3
00:02:05,123 --> 00:02:06,841
Tell me if I'm too early.
4
00:02:07,443 --> 00:02:09,957
What do you think? I haven't done much to it.
5
00:02:10,043 --> 00:02:13,672
I don't really get the time,
up and down to London every day.
6
00:02:13,763 --> 00:02:15,879
Can't believe I've been here six years now.
7
00:02:15,963 --> 00:02:18,397
No! Listen, I mean this room is...
8
00:02:19,323 --> 00:02:22,156
15'3"by 12'8".
9
00:02:23,843 --> 00:02:26,516
So you're looking for somewhere
a bit smaller, did you say?
10
00:02:26,603 --> 00:02:29,834
- But still in the Brighton area?
- Not through choice but...
11
00:02:29,923 --> 00:02:32,312
I mean, the service charge here now is sadistic.
12
00:02:32,403 --> 00:02:35,713
- Prudently administered.
- Yes, is that what I mean?
13
00:02:35,803 --> 00:02:38,522
I mean, it's a lovely block, lovely neighbours.
14
00:02:38,603 --> 00:02:40,673
Except for the flat above.
15
00:02:40,763 --> 00:02:45,200
There's a little boy likes to urinate
out of the window about six or seven times a day.
16
00:02:45,283 --> 00:02:47,399
I have put a note through their door.
17
00:02:47,483 --> 00:02:50,520
Everyone else seems to think
it's sweet, but then I'm odd.
18
00:02:53,603 --> 00:02:55,594
Washer-dryer, very nice.
19
00:02:56,363 --> 00:03:00,561
Are they any good these? Mine's just
totally packed up on me, damned thing.
20
00:03:00,643 --> 00:03:03,999
We can put it down as included
or you might want to negotiate.
21
00:03:05,283 --> 00:03:08,161
That was a moving-in present
from my mum and dad.
22
00:03:10,083 --> 00:03:11,801
Now both...
23
00:03:14,123 --> 00:03:16,432
I can't really bear to think about it at the moment.
24
00:03:16,523 --> 00:03:19,321
Well, you have a ponder and let me know.
25
00:03:20,323 --> 00:03:22,553
Okay, we'll get this printed up
26
00:03:22,643 --> 00:03:25,521
and if I could have that key, please, we're all set.
27
00:03:25,603 --> 00:03:26,718
Yes.
28
00:03:27,563 --> 00:03:31,636
Can I ask, incidentally, what made you
decide to place your property with our firm?
29
00:03:32,203 --> 00:03:35,832
Just the name I suppose.
Tends to stick in your mind, doesn't it?
30
00:03:36,123 --> 00:03:37,954
Rush & Butcher.
31
00:03:38,363 --> 00:03:40,797
Makes you think of Stalin's death camps.
32
00:03:42,083 --> 00:03:44,119
I suppose everyone says that.
33
00:03:44,203 --> 00:03:49,072
Not really. Fingers crossed then.
Got a couple of possibles for tomorrow.
34
00:03:49,443 --> 00:03:52,401
- Will you be back at work then?
- Back on the rat run.
35
00:03:53,163 --> 00:03:55,836
There's this lovely old chap actually,
two doors along,
36
00:03:55,923 --> 00:03:57,959
he gives me a lift to the station.
37
00:04:11,563 --> 00:04:14,839
Of course, he's not only lovely to me,
he's lovely to everyone,
38
00:04:14,923 --> 00:04:17,756
which, obviously, I have to build into my schedule.
39
00:04:17,843 --> 00:04:21,199
But, I don't know,
I just find myself wondering sometimes...
40
00:04:21,283 --> 00:04:22,557
Move!
41
00:04:22,643 --> 00:04:25,157
...when did those values go out of fashion?
42
00:05:01,563 --> 00:05:04,600
What if that woman can read my mind?
43
00:05:06,763 --> 00:05:10,551
Oh, God, that's a terrifying thought.
You're turning into a mad person.
44
00:05:11,843 --> 00:05:13,640
But what if she can?
45
00:05:14,403 --> 00:05:16,075
Hello?
46
00:05:17,323 --> 00:05:20,474
Of course she can't. It's completely impossible.
47
00:05:24,283 --> 00:05:29,118
Well, just don't think about her wig,
that's all, to be on the safe side.
48
00:05:32,243 --> 00:05:35,918
And if you have to think about it,
think only nice things.
49
00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:38,881
Do not think about how hideous it looks.
50
00:05:39,763 --> 00:05:42,516
I mean, the colour for a start, it's a car crash!
51
00:05:46,763 --> 00:05:49,402
Will you try and settle down?
52
00:05:49,483 --> 00:05:53,078
What it must be like to just
breeze through life instead of feeling as if...
53
00:05:53,163 --> 00:05:55,996
you're under this giant microscope all the while.
54
00:05:57,403 --> 00:06:01,635
I don't suppose there's another person in the
whole world who gets hung up on these things.
55
00:06:03,683 --> 00:06:06,880
MAN: Any second now it's going to change.
You know it.
56
00:06:07,883 --> 00:06:11,842
'Cause, I mean, we're almost there.
GBP9, I give him a 10.
57
00:06:11,923 --> 00:06:13,800
"Keep the change."It's perfect.
58
00:06:14,643 --> 00:06:19,000
If it can just stay on nine
till we pull up, just a couple more yards.
59
00:06:19,883 --> 00:06:21,601
There you go!
60
00:06:22,563 --> 00:06:25,441
Now we're into a complete recalculation.
61
00:06:25,563 --> 00:06:30,432
Now I've got to add to the note.
It's 80p, what kind of tip is that?
62
00:06:31,243 --> 00:06:33,632
It's like, "Don't insult me."
63
00:06:33,843 --> 00:06:37,677
So now, because I came out without coins,
I've got to give him two 10s.
64
00:06:38,603 --> 00:06:42,152
Two GBP10 notes for a 9.20 fare.
65
00:06:42,683 --> 00:06:45,641
And say what? "Take a pound for yourself."
66
00:06:45,723 --> 00:06:47,520
It's so patronising.
67
00:06:48,083 --> 00:06:51,871
And then he's going to have to fiddle about
in that big bag of change...
68
00:06:51,963 --> 00:06:55,478
Oh, God, why is this always so difficult?
69
00:06:56,163 --> 00:06:58,597
No wonder I've got hypertension.
70
00:06:58,683 --> 00:07:02,039
163 over 90. Sorry about that.
71
00:07:02,363 --> 00:07:07,198
The doctor said if it hadn't come down,
he'd try me on this... What is it?
72
00:07:07,323 --> 00:07:11,794
- Bendroflumethiazide?
- Yes, it's a diuretic. It can often help.
73
00:07:12,443 --> 00:07:14,320
Of course, you'll end up going a lot more.
74
00:07:14,403 --> 00:07:17,315
So, any long car journeys, I'd keep a bottle handy.
75
00:07:17,963 --> 00:07:20,875
No, I'm serious.
You could traumatise your bladder.
76
00:07:22,523 --> 00:07:25,720
- Have you ever had this done before?
- No, but it's...
77
00:07:25,803 --> 00:07:28,271
the same principle as the electric chair, right?
78
00:07:29,203 --> 00:07:32,240
Of course, driving. I'm always a wreck anyway.
79
00:07:32,323 --> 00:07:34,917
That's why I got a cab here, to try and relax.
80
00:07:35,723 --> 00:07:37,281
Big mistake.
81
00:07:37,363 --> 00:07:40,594
Of course, it didn't help
I'd read this story in the paper.
82
00:07:40,963 --> 00:07:43,841
The Earth's going to be hit by an asteroid.
83
00:07:44,403 --> 00:07:46,280
Did you see that?
84
00:07:46,363 --> 00:07:50,481
Forty years from now,
they're talking a 12% probability...
85
00:07:50,563 --> 00:07:53,839
of a headlong collision
that'll wipe out the whole of mankind.
86
00:07:54,163 --> 00:07:57,838
Okay, now if you can just lie still
and breathe normally for me.
87
00:08:01,843 --> 00:08:03,993
So, how's the comedy-writing going?
88
00:08:04,083 --> 00:08:06,472
Don't think I've seen your name come up lately.
89
00:08:06,603 --> 00:08:09,117
Not that I watch that much on the box these days.
90
00:08:09,203 --> 00:08:11,922
- One or two of the nature programmes.
- Uh-huh.
91
00:08:12,003 --> 00:08:15,359
The BBC, The Natural World.
92
00:08:15,443 --> 00:08:18,640
Oh, right. Last night was the hyenas, yeah.
93
00:08:19,363 --> 00:08:22,161
Ruined by all the canned laughter, of course.
94
00:08:22,443 --> 00:08:25,355
- Sorry?
- No, I was just being fashionable.
95
00:08:25,803 --> 00:08:27,839
Well, can't see any problems there,
96
00:08:27,923 --> 00:08:30,642
but we'll get it all sent off
and properly checked over.
97
00:08:30,723 --> 00:08:33,601
I've been doing a lot of work in the theatre so...
98
00:08:35,123 --> 00:08:39,958
Though I am having lunch today
with this supposedly hotshot TV producer.
99
00:08:40,763 --> 00:08:45,439
Said she wants to pick my brains.
Probably about some cranky new idea,
100
00:08:45,523 --> 00:08:48,959
like, for a sitcom set in a hollow tree
or something.
101
00:08:49,803 --> 00:08:51,998
Incidentally, how are things with you?
102
00:08:52,083 --> 00:08:54,677
You must be getting pretty excited.
What is it, a month to go?
103
00:08:54,763 --> 00:08:58,802
Masses to do and no time to do it.
Never get married, Mr Raymond.
104
00:08:58,883 --> 00:09:01,795
Ah! Well, now we're talking science fiction.
105
00:09:01,883 --> 00:09:04,033
I used to think that, but...
106
00:09:04,123 --> 00:09:08,082
You know, these days, with all
the stupid pressure you have to deal with.
107
00:09:08,163 --> 00:09:12,076
And if you're in your 30s and
still single then you're Bridget Jones.
108
00:09:13,203 --> 00:09:18,072
I mean, life is life, you can't make it happen.
I was just very lucky.
109
00:09:18,683 --> 00:09:23,518
Yeah, 'cause I guess here we all are
in this great cosmic nature programme...
110
00:09:23,603 --> 00:09:27,881
And you can never tell, believe me,
where your heart's going to take you.
111
00:09:27,963 --> 00:09:31,239
- With my luck, the cardiology ward.
- Go away.
112
00:09:47,083 --> 00:09:50,200
Look, do hang on to the receipt, just in case.
113
00:09:50,283 --> 00:09:51,841
Thank you. Okay.
114
00:09:56,403 --> 00:09:59,793
My God, Ali, I don't know.
You wouldn't recognise it, would you,
115
00:09:59,883 --> 00:10:03,000
if it jumped up and bit you? Did you see that?
116
00:10:03,083 --> 00:10:05,802
What are you blathering about now, Cleo?
117
00:10:05,883 --> 00:10:10,001
Why do you think he comes in twice a week?
No one goes through that much aftershave.
118
00:10:10,083 --> 00:10:13,155
And when you're not about,
I've seen him, he just goes away again.
119
00:10:13,243 --> 00:10:16,713
- He's smitten, sticks out a mile.
- Grow up.
120
00:10:16,803 --> 00:10:20,398
Anyway, I've too many other things
on my plate at the moment, I told you,
121
00:10:20,483 --> 00:10:22,872
to get drawn into your fantasy world.
122
00:10:24,123 --> 00:10:26,478
Think we could do with a new tester on here,
123
00:10:26,563 --> 00:10:30,158
if you could uncouple your bottom
from that stool for a moment?
124
00:10:33,763 --> 00:10:37,278
So why doesn't he say something, then?
You've just got a vivid imagination.
125
00:10:37,363 --> 00:10:40,002
Trust me. I know the type he goes for.
126
00:10:40,083 --> 00:10:42,802
He went out with Noleen in John Lewis for a while.
127
00:10:42,883 --> 00:10:45,272
She said he was really nice, just not very pushy.
128
00:10:45,403 --> 00:10:48,679
Noleen? In John Lewis?
129
00:10:50,003 --> 00:10:54,758
- I don't think I find that very flattering.
- It should be perfect for you, shouldn't it?
130
00:10:54,843 --> 00:10:56,720
To know he's not bothered about looks.
131
00:10:56,803 --> 00:10:59,271
You're always saying the guys you meet
are too shallow.
132
00:10:59,363 --> 00:11:02,719
The only thing, he has got this one little quirk,
133
00:11:02,803 --> 00:11:05,795
which, of course, she couldn't deal with,
which is why she dumped him.
134
00:11:05,883 --> 00:11:08,397
But then, of course, she hasn't got
your sense of adventure.
135
00:11:08,483 --> 00:11:12,271
Listen, I'm not that adventurous...
if it's anything to do with eels
136
00:11:12,363 --> 00:11:13,921
or mummification.
137
00:11:14,003 --> 00:11:17,791
He just happens to have a thing for feet.
That's all it is.
138
00:11:17,883 --> 00:11:20,443
It's hardly even a perversion by today's standards.
139
00:11:20,523 --> 00:11:24,436
So long as your toenails are nice and clean.
You wouldn't want him to get a throat infection.
140
00:11:24,523 --> 00:11:27,037
Can we talk about something else, please?
141
00:11:29,803 --> 00:11:31,873
Is Milly all right this morning?
142
00:11:31,963 --> 00:11:35,160
Oh, boyfriend trouble, I think.
I'll have a word at lunch.
143
00:11:54,763 --> 00:11:58,472
- Gil? How are you? Gina Massey.
- Yes, good to see you.
144
00:11:58,563 --> 00:12:02,351
- Hi. Have I kept you waiting long? I'm sorry.
- No, just a few minutes.
145
00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:07,801
- Would you like anything to drink?
- I'm just going to have some still water with...
146
00:12:07,883 --> 00:12:09,760
- Have you got any fresh lime?
- Yes.
147
00:12:09,843 --> 00:12:11,799
That'd be great, thanks.
148
00:12:13,283 --> 00:12:17,640
Can I ask, are you comfortable here?
We can move to another table.
149
00:12:18,483 --> 00:12:22,920
This is perfect. Don't you just love the feel
of this place, the whole energy here?
150
00:12:23,803 --> 00:12:26,715
Anything to get out of that high-rise sweat-box.
151
00:12:26,803 --> 00:12:30,557
I'm really not an indoor person at all
if you want the truth, but...
152
00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:34,075
So listen, did Karen explain to you
what we're up to?
153
00:12:34,163 --> 00:12:37,712
Just that you were trying to get
some writers together for this new project.
154
00:12:37,803 --> 00:12:42,115
Okay, basically, it's six hours,
each one self-contained,
155
00:12:42,203 --> 00:12:46,481
which the network have already bought
in principle, called Love Soup.
156
00:12:47,243 --> 00:12:51,202
The brief being as wide as you want to
make it, a comedy about relationships.
157
00:12:51,283 --> 00:12:53,319
From there, it's over to you.
158
00:12:53,403 --> 00:12:56,793
You know, because I'm not a writer,
that's what we pay you guys to do.
159
00:12:56,883 --> 00:12:58,601
I'm a great believer in that.
160
00:12:58,683 --> 00:13:02,835
Give good people the freedom
to express themselves, you'll get good work.
161
00:13:02,923 --> 00:13:06,472
Love Soup? Did you come up with that?
162
00:13:06,563 --> 00:13:08,474
- You hate it, okay.
- Your water.
163
00:13:08,563 --> 00:13:12,602
- Thanks.
- No, not at all, it's good.
164
00:13:15,563 --> 00:13:17,440
So should we order...?
165
00:13:19,923 --> 00:13:22,596
I mean, I just think it's typical of my luck,
that's all.
166
00:13:22,683 --> 00:13:26,676
I meet this really great bloke,
I'm completely mad about, he's mad about me.
167
00:13:26,763 --> 00:13:30,199
And when he said, "I must warn you,
my grandparents came from Germany,"
168
00:13:30,283 --> 00:13:34,196
- I was like, "Yeah, okay. So what?"
- It's not like they were Nazis or anything.
169
00:13:34,283 --> 00:13:36,922
You know, it's ancient history, right?
170
00:13:37,003 --> 00:13:40,200
And then when he told me
his surname was Alzheimer.
171
00:13:40,283 --> 00:13:43,480
Because for two weeks
I'd just known him as Kevin.
172
00:13:43,563 --> 00:13:47,442
Now, that is a bummer, Milly,
I've got to be honest. What are the chances?
173
00:13:47,523 --> 00:13:50,401
I mean, he's all right at the moment,
obviously, but...
174
00:13:50,523 --> 00:13:53,276
- How do you mean?
- Well, we don't know, do we?
175
00:13:53,363 --> 00:13:57,595
If it was in his family to start with and it's still
lurking about somewhere in the genes?
176
00:13:57,683 --> 00:14:00,834
That's where you lose
all your memory and everything, right?
177
00:14:00,923 --> 00:14:03,278
That's what my grandad died of.
178
00:14:03,363 --> 00:14:08,198
Well, it wasn't exactly what he died of, was it?
He just forgot to put his seat belt on.
179
00:14:08,283 --> 00:14:11,514
You see, I don't think
it was the person who first had the disease.
180
00:14:11,603 --> 00:14:14,959
I think it was probably named after
the doctor who discovered it so, you know,
181
00:14:15,043 --> 00:14:17,557
he could have
quite a distinguished family history.
182
00:14:17,643 --> 00:14:19,474
Yeah, but...
183
00:14:20,403 --> 00:14:23,361
what kind of a name is that
to go through married life with?
184
00:14:23,443 --> 00:14:27,880
Mrs Milly Alzheimer? "The doctor
will see you now, Mrs Alzheimer."
185
00:14:28,443 --> 00:14:30,240
All the jokes you'd get,
186
00:14:30,323 --> 00:14:33,360
like if our children were the first
to turn up at a party or something,
187
00:14:33,443 --> 00:14:35,638
"Oh, dear, we've got early Alzheimers."
188
00:14:35,723 --> 00:14:39,079
Do you think he'd consider changing it, then?
To something like Bruckheimer...
189
00:14:39,163 --> 00:14:43,236
Did anyone read about this asteroid?
It's absolutely incredible.
190
00:14:43,323 --> 00:14:47,362
That's not going to embarrass the little ones, is it?
One of the co-producers of Batman.
191
00:14:47,443 --> 00:14:52,119
Forty years from now, they're saying if it hits us,
it will be the end of life on this planet.
192
00:14:52,203 --> 00:14:54,842
That's a bit of a worry, isn't it?
193
00:14:54,923 --> 00:14:56,754
Why is it only on page five?
194
00:14:56,843 --> 00:14:59,437
Well, I don't suppose there's anything
we can do about it.
195
00:14:59,523 --> 00:15:03,516
But doesn't that totally terrify you,
that one day we might all just be complete...
196
00:15:06,363 --> 00:15:09,036
Is it my imagination or have you...
197
00:15:10,123 --> 00:15:12,432
perked up a bit in the last half hour?
198
00:15:12,523 --> 00:15:15,720
She just wants to get noticed
by the new security guy when he comes in.
199
00:15:15,803 --> 00:15:18,681
If he comes in. Suppose there's still time.
200
00:15:20,243 --> 00:15:24,441
All right, I had to cheat a little.
Sometimes nature needs a helping hand.
201
00:15:24,523 --> 00:15:26,479
And Plasticine's so versatile.
202
00:15:27,403 --> 00:15:29,439
Yes, all the same,
203
00:15:29,523 --> 00:15:33,835
if you can make sure Wallace and Gromit
are gone by the time we get back to the counter.
204
00:15:34,563 --> 00:15:38,397
I don't know, what is it with you people?
The only topic of conversation is men.
205
00:15:38,483 --> 00:15:42,158
How to get them, what happens when
you've got them, and then how to get rid of them.
206
00:15:42,243 --> 00:15:44,632
God, it's all I ever hear, is men.
207
00:15:45,803 --> 00:15:47,634
She needs a man.
208
00:15:47,723 --> 00:15:50,362
Come on, Ali, it's not rocket salad.
209
00:15:50,443 --> 00:15:53,753
And you know what I said before,
if you're looking for a dead cert...
210
00:15:53,843 --> 00:15:55,879
Thank you, Cleo, no.
211
00:15:55,963 --> 00:15:58,557
I am not going out with a foot fetishist.
212
00:15:59,363 --> 00:16:01,240
I caught a few Lollipop Men,
213
00:16:01,323 --> 00:16:04,633
which I thought,
considering it was quite a safe, ensemble piece,
214
00:16:04,723 --> 00:16:07,362
there were some nice edgy things in there.
Did it do well?
215
00:16:07,443 --> 00:16:12,722
Sadly, yes. But I said no to the next series
'cause I feel I've been there too many times.
216
00:16:12,803 --> 00:16:15,033
Because you did a lot of sitcom work back home.
217
00:16:15,123 --> 00:16:18,354
Eight years, making shit-loads of money and...
218
00:16:18,443 --> 00:16:22,436
I mean, just sitting in a room all day
with a bunch of guys trading lines,
219
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:26,641
you know, and everyone's there
trying to top each other's gag, but...
220
00:16:26,723 --> 00:16:31,751
It's all so mechanistic, you know,
with wall-to-wall put-downs
221
00:16:31,843 --> 00:16:33,993
and smart aleck remarks.
222
00:16:34,083 --> 00:16:36,995
You've got all these Neanderthals
from the network
223
00:16:37,083 --> 00:16:39,836
who think
they've discovered the secret of comedy,
224
00:16:39,923 --> 00:16:43,916
which actually no one in the world knows,
certainly not me.
225
00:16:44,403 --> 00:16:47,236
Like it's just a recipe for a soufflé or something.
226
00:16:47,883 --> 00:16:52,798
- Sorry, I didn't come here to sermonise.
- No, it's really interesting.
227
00:16:52,883 --> 00:16:57,081
Because, it's like,
intellectuals can only intellectualise.
228
00:16:57,163 --> 00:17:01,600
Anything that's just intuitive
that they can't dissect, or explain,
229
00:17:01,683 --> 00:17:04,481
frustrates the hell out of them.
I've always thought that.
230
00:17:05,363 --> 00:17:08,719
Absolutely. Yes, that's absolutely it.
231
00:17:11,483 --> 00:17:15,556
- So, then, what brought you to England?
- What else? A woman.
232
00:17:16,163 --> 00:17:19,155
Her name was Lucy.
She worked for an English production company
233
00:17:19,243 --> 00:17:21,313
I was involved with for a while.
234
00:17:21,443 --> 00:17:27,200
And it was, you know, a life-changing decision.
I sold my house in the valley, everything.
235
00:17:27,283 --> 00:17:30,400
Bought this lovely old place in the country here
236
00:17:30,483 --> 00:17:33,600
where we were going to grow old together and...
237
00:17:34,643 --> 00:17:38,113
You know, I'm off the plane three hours...
238
00:17:38,643 --> 00:17:41,237
How can you have found someone else?
Is this a joke?
239
00:17:41,323 --> 00:17:43,996
All right!
Stop making me feel so shitty about it, okay?
240
00:17:44,083 --> 00:17:47,393
I mean, how do you think I feel
as the guilty party in all this?
241
00:17:47,483 --> 00:17:50,600
It's not as if I planned for it to happen,
he just landed in my lap.
242
00:17:50,683 --> 00:17:54,358
- I'll bet he enjoyed that.
- I can't explain it, Robby can't explain it.
243
00:17:54,443 --> 00:17:56,479
It's just like the two of us have this chemistry.
244
00:17:56,563 --> 00:17:59,361
Yeah, so did Watson and Crick,
they didn't sleep together!
245
00:17:59,443 --> 00:18:02,879
So here I am, jilted for a man named Robby.
246
00:18:04,043 --> 00:18:06,432
Gosh, we're so fickle, aren't we?
247
00:18:08,243 --> 00:18:13,237
But there you go, if all that hadn't happened,
I wouldn't be sitting with you here today so...
248
00:18:15,363 --> 00:18:17,354
- Great.
- Thank you very much.
249
00:18:18,163 --> 00:18:21,758
- Incidentally, that was great, thanks.
- You're very welcome.
250
00:18:22,803 --> 00:18:27,354
Listen, I've written this play,
I don't know if it would interest you.
251
00:18:27,443 --> 00:18:31,197
It's kind of like a little fringe thing
on Friday, about a couple of young guys
252
00:18:31,283 --> 00:18:35,117
who were working the clubs in Greenwich Village,
New York, back in the '60s,
253
00:18:35,203 --> 00:18:39,082
who are one day destined to grow into
these two great cultural icons.
254
00:18:39,163 --> 00:18:42,872
One's a comedian and one's a folk singer.
It's a kind of a, what do you call it,
255
00:18:42,963 --> 00:18:46,114
a roman à clef, called The Joker To The Thief.
256
00:18:46,203 --> 00:18:49,559
I mean, you know, I don't suppose
257
00:18:49,643 --> 00:18:53,556
- it's something that really falls within your...
- It sounds great.
258
00:18:53,643 --> 00:18:58,114
- Next Friday? Can I come?
- Yeah, I'd love you to come.
259
00:18:58,203 --> 00:19:02,037
I mean, as long as you're aware, that's all,
that we're still breaking it in.
260
00:19:02,123 --> 00:19:05,001
So, great, I'll organise...
261
00:19:06,683 --> 00:19:08,674
- two tickets, then?
- Would you?
262
00:19:08,763 --> 00:19:11,880
And let me make a note of that
or I know I'll forget.
263
00:19:11,963 --> 00:19:15,160
- The Joker and the Thief.
- No, that's The Joker To The Thief.
264
00:19:15,243 --> 00:19:19,521
It's from All Along the Watchtower.
You know, "There must be some way out of here."
265
00:19:19,603 --> 00:19:23,596
Hang on. I've got a meeting at 5:30.
Might go on for a bit.
266
00:19:23,683 --> 00:19:25,196
Okay, well...
267
00:19:25,283 --> 00:19:29,162
Why don't you leave my ticket at the box office?
Just in case I'm not there in time.
268
00:19:29,243 --> 00:19:33,919
And maybe we could have a drink
afterwards, whatever, and talk about it.
269
00:20:03,203 --> 00:20:04,272
Move!
270
00:21:09,683 --> 00:21:12,914
Well, who else could it be?
She's the only one with a key.
271
00:21:13,003 --> 00:21:15,233
Besides, I recognised the colour.
272
00:21:15,323 --> 00:21:18,793
And it's obviously been more than once,
the way that fabric conditioner's gone down.
273
00:21:18,883 --> 00:21:21,192
Well, you want to complain. Definitely.
274
00:21:21,283 --> 00:21:23,433
Because, I mean, that is seriously not on.
275
00:21:23,523 --> 00:21:25,718
Good morning. What's happening?
What've I missed?
276
00:21:25,803 --> 00:21:29,512
Ali found an estate agent's bra
in her washing machine.
277
00:21:29,603 --> 00:21:33,198
- Get out of town! That's outrageous.
- Can you believe that?
278
00:21:33,283 --> 00:21:37,196
When she's supposed to have been showing
people around. I don't know,
279
00:21:37,283 --> 00:21:40,832
you give people access to your property,
suddenly they're bringing in laundry.
280
00:21:40,923 --> 00:21:44,313
No, that is crossing the line,
I'm sorry, of professional conduct.
281
00:21:44,403 --> 00:21:47,713
You do not want someone else's underwear
anywhere near your food surfaces.
282
00:21:47,803 --> 00:21:50,033
Underwear and God knows what else.
283
00:21:50,123 --> 00:21:53,718
I left home in the morning, that dial
was definitely set to colour-fast cotton.
284
00:21:53,803 --> 00:21:57,079
- And then when I get home...
- Don't tell me, acrylics?
285
00:21:57,163 --> 00:22:00,599
The sheer gall of the woman.
I mean, when you think of it,
286
00:22:00,683 --> 00:22:03,243
she could be doing anything in that place
while I'm out.
287
00:22:03,323 --> 00:22:07,316
That's a point. She could be using it
to have an affair with a married man
288
00:22:07,403 --> 00:22:09,075
- or something.
- Oh, God, yeah!
289
00:22:09,163 --> 00:22:12,394
And then washing all the sheets and everything
afterwards to cover her tracks.
290
00:22:12,483 --> 00:22:14,872
Do you think? What, and then ironing them?
291
00:22:14,963 --> 00:22:18,319
That depends. I suppose the fitted
undersheet you wouldn't really need to.
292
00:22:18,403 --> 00:22:21,918
And you wouldn't want it to look too perfect
or it'd be obvious what was going on.
293
00:22:22,003 --> 00:22:25,439
- So you think she'd just rough-dry them?
- Then go over them with a cool iron.
294
00:22:25,523 --> 00:22:27,798
Might want to open the window for a bit
to let it air.
295
00:22:27,883 --> 00:22:30,033
Yes, have you two finished?
296
00:22:30,123 --> 00:22:34,514
I mean, let's not build this up too far, shall we?
Into a global conspiracy.
297
00:22:35,043 --> 00:22:37,398
She's been found out and that's that.
298
00:22:37,483 --> 00:22:41,761
And I shall be straight round their office
tomorrow, I can tell you, to get that key back.
299
00:22:41,843 --> 00:22:45,040
Well, that's not going to be good enough, is it?
What if she's made copies?
300
00:22:45,123 --> 00:22:48,479
- Are you serious?
- Oh, God, Ali, you're so trusting.
301
00:22:48,563 --> 00:22:50,554
That's how people take advantage of you.
302
00:22:50,643 --> 00:22:53,601
If that was me, no argument,
I'd get the locks changed.
303
00:22:56,243 --> 00:23:00,316
ANNOUNCER: Would all staff please return
to your stations. The store is now open.
304
00:23:08,443 --> 00:23:11,321
GIL: No, that sounds very generous.
305
00:23:11,803 --> 00:23:16,160
Even minus your percentage, that's going to be...
Yeah, fine.
306
00:23:17,283 --> 00:23:18,557
Sorry?
307
00:23:19,363 --> 00:23:21,752
Oh, surprisingly...
308
00:23:23,563 --> 00:23:25,599
Not what I expected, no.
309
00:23:25,683 --> 00:23:29,471
In fact, I think, you know,
it could be quite a fun thing to do
310
00:23:29,563 --> 00:23:31,155
and quite liberating.
311
00:23:31,243 --> 00:23:33,837
Plus, she's coming to see the play on Friday so...
312
00:23:33,923 --> 00:23:36,676
Well, you know... Anyway, we'll see.
313
00:23:38,763 --> 00:23:40,196
Now...
314
00:23:41,323 --> 00:23:45,794
I think I got my next door neighbours
looming here so I'm going to have to go.
315
00:23:46,123 --> 00:23:49,354
No, they're nice people, it's just...
316
00:23:49,443 --> 00:23:52,879
they never wear enough clothes
for my liking in this weather.
317
00:23:52,963 --> 00:23:56,273
And, you know, I could do without all
that moist flesh on my upholstery.
318
00:23:57,923 --> 00:23:58,799
Okay, Tim, I'll see you tomorrow.
319
00:24:00,323 --> 00:24:02,996
- Hey, how are you?
- Gil, how are you doing?
320
00:24:03,083 --> 00:24:05,756
Not interrupting your creative flow, are we?
321
00:24:06,443 --> 00:24:09,594
Probably glad of a breather, I'll bet.
Hot day like this.
322
00:24:09,683 --> 00:24:11,719
- It's gorgeous!
- Isn't it?
323
00:24:11,803 --> 00:24:15,398
- Erm... can I get you anything to drink?
- We can't stay long.
324
00:24:15,483 --> 00:24:18,680
But, thank you. A little water, I think,
would be nice, wouldn't it?
325
00:24:18,763 --> 00:24:21,072
- Yeah.
- Water? Yeah, okay.
326
00:24:23,043 --> 00:24:27,161
Yes. Just wondering if we could ask
our usual favour of you, Gil?
327
00:24:27,243 --> 00:24:30,713
Saturday week, we're off to Irene's sister's
for a long weekend.
328
00:24:30,803 --> 00:24:32,919
- You know, down in St Ives.
- It should be nice.
329
00:24:33,003 --> 00:24:36,393
With my new digital camera
someone bought me for my birthday.
330
00:24:36,483 --> 00:24:39,919
Yeah, she's been having fun with that thing.
She's gone real digital junkie.
331
00:24:40,003 --> 00:24:42,676
- Stuck in front of that computer.
- I'm guessing you'd like
332
00:24:42,763 --> 00:24:45,357
the old tomatoes watered while you're gone.
No problem.
333
00:24:45,443 --> 00:24:48,913
- Would you mind? Just be four days.
- Absolutely. No, my pleasure.
334
00:24:49,323 --> 00:24:51,632
- Good.
- Bless you, that'll be a real big help.
335
00:24:54,603 --> 00:24:57,276
So, are things good with you, Bob?
You're looking well.
336
00:24:57,363 --> 00:24:59,513
Well, not missing the bank, that's for sure.
337
00:24:59,603 --> 00:25:02,322
I think I told you,
I'm at the gym three times a week now.
338
00:25:02,403 --> 00:25:06,362
I try and eat sensibly, you know.
Now I just have to watch the old whisky levels.
339
00:25:06,443 --> 00:25:09,321
- You are very disciplined.
- That's right, I meant to say.
340
00:25:09,403 --> 00:25:11,519
- You go to the Pineways Health Club, right?
- Yeah.
341
00:25:11,603 --> 00:25:14,117
I was down there this morning, signing up.
342
00:25:14,203 --> 00:25:17,673
You know, I'm on all these diuretics and stuff
for my blood pressure...
343
00:25:17,763 --> 00:25:19,958
- Of course.
- Got to get more exercise in.
344
00:25:20,043 --> 00:25:24,480
- You'll have a great time in that place.
- You've been going there, what, three years?
345
00:25:24,563 --> 00:25:26,713
They got all the gear, personal trainers...
346
00:25:26,803 --> 00:25:31,081
I know, if they can just come around and prise me
out of bed in the morning. That would be...
347
00:25:31,163 --> 00:25:33,836
You know, with a tyre lever or something.
348
00:25:35,723 --> 00:25:38,442
Oh, but what about that guy Tuesday morning?
349
00:25:39,523 --> 00:25:43,072
Collapsed and died on the running machine. Wow.
350
00:25:43,163 --> 00:25:48,112
Right in front of everyone. I mean,
he was in his 70s, these things happen, but...
351
00:25:50,203 --> 00:25:53,957
You were at the gym Tuesday morning.
You didn't say anything about this.
352
00:25:54,803 --> 00:25:58,591
Well, no, obviously because
it would have upset you to hear about it so...
353
00:25:58,683 --> 00:26:01,675
- Well, it would.
- I mean, God, it upset me.
354
00:26:02,323 --> 00:26:05,952
I mean, poor old guy just lying there.
Terrible thing.
355
00:26:08,563 --> 00:26:12,238
Incidentally, if you find any ripe ones out there,
you know the drill, just help yourself.
356
00:26:12,323 --> 00:26:15,201
- They're lovely and sweet.
- Yeah. Great. I'll do that.
357
00:26:15,283 --> 00:26:19,481
- We're going to have masses, as ever.
- Definitely. I'll keep my eye out. Thanks.
358
00:26:19,563 --> 00:26:22,794
Yeah. 'Cause we got to
look after our prostates, right?
359
00:26:24,083 --> 00:26:27,792
Didn't I read that somewhere,
tomatoes are really good for all that?
360
00:26:27,883 --> 00:26:30,841
So I believe, especially when
they're in a tin for some reason.
361
00:26:30,923 --> 00:26:34,199
Personally, I would never
keep my prostate in a tin
362
00:26:34,283 --> 00:26:37,559
because, you know, it is inconvenient,
to say the least.
363
00:26:41,323 --> 00:26:44,315
No, I just think it's odd you didn't say anything.
That's all.
364
00:26:44,403 --> 00:26:47,361
Because I distinctly remember
when you came home I asked you,
365
00:26:47,443 --> 00:26:50,594
"How did it go today?"
And you made a big joke about it.
366
00:26:50,963 --> 00:26:53,636
You said, "Oh, I think this exercise
is really doing me good."
367
00:26:53,723 --> 00:26:56,681
And then suddenly clutched your chest
and started staggering about
368
00:26:56,763 --> 00:26:59,755
as if you were having a heart attack. I mean...
369
00:27:00,683 --> 00:27:03,800
after you've just seen someone
having a fatal coronary?
370
00:27:04,963 --> 00:27:09,639
- Doesn't sound as if you were that upset.
- No, I suppose, in hindsight maybe...
371
00:27:09,723 --> 00:27:13,796
it was my way of dealing with it. Sorry.
372
00:27:13,883 --> 00:27:16,397
You know, I didn't really think it through.
373
00:27:18,683 --> 00:27:21,516
Well, we should go, I think.
374
00:27:21,603 --> 00:27:24,322
- Let you get on with your life.
- Okay, well...
375
00:27:24,403 --> 00:27:26,200
While we get on with ours.
376
00:27:26,283 --> 00:27:31,403
Don't you dare talk to me about the truth
when our whole relationship has been one big lie.
377
00:27:31,483 --> 00:27:34,202
Sweetheart, please.
Can't we just sit down and talk about this?
378
00:27:34,283 --> 00:27:36,672
- This is yours, I think.
- Steady on.
379
00:27:36,763 --> 00:27:40,073
- And these are all yours.
- Oh, God, no.
380
00:27:40,683 --> 00:27:42,435
Bob, what the hell's going on?
381
00:27:42,523 --> 00:27:45,720
I just hope you're happy now.
You've totally destroyed my life.
382
00:27:45,803 --> 00:27:48,158
- Thank you very much.
- What did I do?
383
00:27:48,243 --> 00:27:49,995
What didn't you do?
384
00:27:50,083 --> 00:27:52,756
Opened your great big mouth
so now the genie's out of the bottle.
385
00:27:52,843 --> 00:27:55,118
And I'm out on the street. Thanks a bundle.
386
00:27:55,203 --> 00:27:57,797
Just because you didn't tell her
what happened in the gym?
387
00:27:57,883 --> 00:28:01,000
I wasn't in the gym. I never go to the bloody gym.
388
00:28:01,083 --> 00:28:04,758
For God's sake, I get my exercise elsewhere.
389
00:28:05,603 --> 00:28:07,275
What are you talking about?
390
00:28:07,363 --> 00:28:09,638
Do you know how hard it is
to effect that kind of cover?
391
00:28:09,723 --> 00:28:11,998
Have you any idea the work involved?
392
00:28:12,083 --> 00:28:15,234
- I don't understand.
- No, you don't understand anything
393
00:28:15,323 --> 00:28:18,076
about how a marriage works after 25 years.
394
00:28:18,163 --> 00:28:22,236
How much I still love my wife
and how a little stress relief
395
00:28:22,323 --> 00:28:25,872
three times a week with a professional lady
never hurt anything or anyone
396
00:28:25,963 --> 00:28:27,840
until you came along.
397
00:28:29,043 --> 00:28:33,400
- That's yours and that's yours and this is yours.
- Please.
398
00:28:34,323 --> 00:28:36,473
And aren't we forgetting one more thing?
399
00:28:36,563 --> 00:28:38,235
No, Irene.
400
00:28:38,323 --> 00:28:40,359
I think this is yours.
401
00:28:41,323 --> 00:28:42,597
Oh!
402
00:28:43,523 --> 00:28:46,276
For mercy's sake, Irene, please.
403
00:28:46,643 --> 00:28:48,713
Now just go!
404
00:28:49,563 --> 00:28:52,600
God, this is just...
I mean, what are you trying to do to me?
405
00:28:52,683 --> 00:28:56,756
- God Almighty.
- And don't ever come back!
406
00:28:59,723 --> 00:29:04,433
Maybe I'm overreacting, I don't know.
She was so apologetic on the phone.
407
00:29:04,523 --> 00:29:08,357
I mean, practically in tears.
How unprofessional it was.
408
00:29:08,443 --> 00:29:10,877
What would happen if her boss found out?
409
00:29:10,963 --> 00:29:14,160
She's promised faithfully to send me
another bottle of Comfort.
410
00:29:14,243 --> 00:29:18,555
No, you're being very sensible.
A thing like that happens, you don't take chances.
411
00:29:19,363 --> 00:29:21,194
Some of the stories I could tell you.
412
00:29:21,283 --> 00:29:26,198
Right, I bet you get to hear about
some real nasty happenings in your business.
413
00:29:26,283 --> 00:29:30,435
An old girlfriend of mine once
said to me, "People are gross."
414
00:29:31,163 --> 00:29:32,881
I always remember that.
415
00:29:32,963 --> 00:29:36,035
We are supposed to be
evolving as a species, don't they say?
416
00:29:37,043 --> 00:29:40,592
- God help us in 100 years' time.
- I know, it's like even when you look back
417
00:29:40,683 --> 00:29:43,561
at those quiz shows from just 20 years ago.
418
00:29:44,043 --> 00:29:48,036
People who went on them
had a certain humility and dignity.
419
00:29:48,123 --> 00:29:50,193
Today it would just be seen as wet.
420
00:29:51,683 --> 00:29:54,402
Let not Ambition mock their useful toil
421
00:29:55,763 --> 00:29:59,233
their homely joys, and destiny obscure.
422
00:30:00,843 --> 00:30:02,162
Gray's Elegy.
423
00:30:03,803 --> 00:30:06,363
It was one of my father's favourite poems.
424
00:30:06,443 --> 00:30:09,355
It just completely summed up
the sort of man he was.
425
00:30:11,163 --> 00:30:12,755
All his life...
426
00:30:13,283 --> 00:30:15,922
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...
427
00:30:16,403 --> 00:30:17,722
No, no, no.
428
00:30:18,243 --> 00:30:21,553
It's just, my father only died a month ago so...
429
00:30:21,883 --> 00:30:23,077
Oh, no.
430
00:30:23,163 --> 00:30:25,757
He'd been very poorly for about 18 months.
431
00:30:26,923 --> 00:30:32,555
But it didn't help that some
bastard, pardon my language,
432
00:30:32,643 --> 00:30:36,636
broke into his flat and started
knocking him about for his pension.
433
00:30:38,123 --> 00:30:40,762
If you'd seen the state he left him in.
434
00:30:42,803 --> 00:30:44,998
Five broken bones,
435
00:30:45,083 --> 00:30:47,392
33 stitches needed in his face.
436
00:30:48,323 --> 00:30:50,473
And I don't suppose they ever caught him.
437
00:30:50,563 --> 00:30:52,713
Caught him...
438
00:30:52,803 --> 00:30:57,081
but couldn't make the charges stick
because my dad was half blind.
439
00:30:59,083 --> 00:31:00,994
But he knew who did it.
440
00:31:03,283 --> 00:31:07,720
Anyway, I don't suppose we're going to put
the world to rights, are we, between us?
441
00:31:07,803 --> 00:31:10,317
However hard we try so...
442
00:31:12,603 --> 00:31:15,197
No, but then again...
443
00:31:15,283 --> 00:31:17,274
we could try a bit harder.
444
00:31:22,243 --> 00:31:25,553
Look, apart from anything else,
don't you think that's a public health hazard?
445
00:31:25,643 --> 00:31:28,111
And, frankly, I don't see
why I should have to put up with it.
446
00:31:28,203 --> 00:31:30,763
You have got a lavatory in this flat, I take it?
447
00:31:30,843 --> 00:31:33,038
Excuse me, would you mind lowering your voice?
448
00:31:33,123 --> 00:31:35,398
I've got a six-month-old baby in there
trying to sleep.
449
00:31:35,483 --> 00:31:37,758
It's a good thing I haven't got a window box.
450
00:31:37,843 --> 00:31:40,801
You call yourself a mother, I suggest
you try bringing him up a bit better.
451
00:31:40,883 --> 00:31:43,522
I don't think I need a lecture
on parenting skills from you.
452
00:31:43,603 --> 00:31:46,436
How many children have you brought
into the world, I wonder?
453
00:31:46,523 --> 00:31:48,354
I've told him it's wrong and he mustn't do it.
454
00:31:48,443 --> 00:31:52,152
He's just going through a dysfunctional phase
where he needs to express himself.
455
00:31:52,243 --> 00:31:55,713
Yes, well, maybe you need to make the point
a little more firmly.
456
00:31:55,803 --> 00:31:58,920
- Are you suggesting I should hit my son?
- When did I say that?
457
00:31:59,003 --> 00:32:01,915
Give him a good clip round the ear?
That'll soon knock some sense into him.
458
00:32:02,003 --> 00:32:03,914
Now you're just putting words in my mouth.
459
00:32:04,003 --> 00:32:06,392
I think we all know
where you stand on the issues of the day.
460
00:32:06,483 --> 00:32:09,475
Maybe you hadn't noticed.
We're not living in Victorian England anymore.
461
00:32:09,563 --> 00:32:12,555
- You should learn to be a bit more tolerant.
- Victorian...
462
00:32:12,643 --> 00:32:15,794
Now just a minute. I beg your pardon.
463
00:32:26,723 --> 00:32:28,998
Well, that could have gone better.
464
00:32:29,443 --> 00:32:33,675
So now I feel like Rhodes Boyson or someone.
Why didn't you stop me?
465
00:32:33,763 --> 00:32:36,755
- Is this the final damage?
- Lf you wouldn't mind.
466
00:32:36,843 --> 00:32:41,200
To Adam Coates, please. C-O-A-T-E-S.
467
00:32:43,243 --> 00:32:46,315
I don't know.
Don't see me ever selling this place now.
468
00:32:47,363 --> 00:32:49,354
I'm obviously just stuck here.
469
00:32:49,443 --> 00:32:51,957
With one expense after another.
470
00:32:52,043 --> 00:32:54,876
Oh, dear. Sounds like you need cheering up.
471
00:32:55,283 --> 00:32:58,798
No, come in.
I was just sorting out some more things.
472
00:32:58,883 --> 00:33:00,635
Trying to get my head around it all.
473
00:33:00,723 --> 00:33:03,362
I'm probably the last person
you'd want to see right now,
474
00:33:03,443 --> 00:33:05,673
but when I heard that gunshot...
475
00:33:05,763 --> 00:33:08,072
Yes, well...
476
00:33:08,163 --> 00:33:10,723
That was just me being bitter and twisted.
477
00:33:10,803 --> 00:33:13,601
Something else for him to collect in the morning.
478
00:33:15,003 --> 00:33:16,482
Have a seat.
479
00:33:16,563 --> 00:33:19,282
All that stuff out there with you and Bob
480
00:33:19,363 --> 00:33:22,116
really churned me up inside,
you know, the whole thing.
481
00:33:22,203 --> 00:33:24,922
I mean, you make one innocent remark
like that and...
482
00:33:25,003 --> 00:33:27,517
It's not the fact that he was seeing a prostitute.
483
00:33:27,603 --> 00:33:29,958
It's the fact that he lied to me.
484
00:33:30,043 --> 00:33:33,240
Is that how it's supposed to go? Well, I'm sorry.
485
00:33:33,323 --> 00:33:37,635
It is the fact that he was seeing a prostitute.
And the fact that he lied to me.
486
00:33:37,723 --> 00:33:40,521
I mean, how does he think
I'm going to react to something like that?
487
00:33:40,603 --> 00:33:43,640
That I'm just going to roll over,
like she does, and take it?
488
00:33:43,723 --> 00:33:46,362
Still, as long as I know now that you're okay...
489
00:33:46,443 --> 00:33:49,560
And what's that supposed to mean?
May I be so bold as to ask?
490
00:33:49,643 --> 00:33:51,361
"It was only sex."
491
00:33:51,443 --> 00:33:54,355
Like that's some kind of
mitigating factor or something.
492
00:33:54,443 --> 00:33:58,038
And it's all okay
because he doesn't love her or respect her.
493
00:33:58,123 --> 00:34:02,480
I said, "Listen, if that's how you show
your respect for me, I can live without it."
494
00:34:02,563 --> 00:34:05,282
You'll probably want some time
on your own right now,
495
00:34:05,363 --> 00:34:07,035
to get your thoughts together...
496
00:34:07,123 --> 00:34:10,399
Sex, right? Seems to be what it's all about.
497
00:34:10,483 --> 00:34:12,872
The wonderful F-word. God!
498
00:34:14,243 --> 00:34:16,677
Don't you think we were like that to begin with?
499
00:34:16,763 --> 00:34:21,120
Of course we were.
F-wording each other's brains out!
500
00:34:21,203 --> 00:34:24,161
The way you do when it's all still an adventure.
501
00:34:24,243 --> 00:34:26,996
Sex is what brings you together.
502
00:34:27,083 --> 00:34:29,756
It's not what keeps you together.
503
00:34:29,843 --> 00:34:31,959
That's something else entirely.
504
00:34:35,203 --> 00:34:36,477
Black.
505
00:34:37,323 --> 00:34:39,837
He always had this thing for me in black.
506
00:34:40,523 --> 00:34:42,593
Whenever we'd go out for the night,
507
00:34:42,683 --> 00:34:45,834
I'd put on some short, clinging black dress.
508
00:34:46,883 --> 00:34:48,919
Really showed off my legs.
509
00:34:50,403 --> 00:34:53,156
I had great legs in those days.
510
00:34:53,243 --> 00:34:55,438
In sheer black tights.
511
00:34:55,523 --> 00:35:01,439
You know, that really fine, silky nylon that
almost whispers when your thighs brush together.
512
00:35:03,483 --> 00:35:05,838
Black high-heeled shoes.
513
00:35:07,083 --> 00:35:09,392
God, he couldn't wait to get me home.
514
00:35:10,283 --> 00:35:13,195
And, of course, there'd be more
of the same underneath.
515
00:35:13,603 --> 00:35:16,037
I mean, I could never see it but...
516
00:35:17,523 --> 00:35:19,798
he said that's how it was for most men.
517
00:35:21,163 --> 00:35:22,960
I can see the appeal.
518
00:35:24,643 --> 00:35:27,316
I mean, we all have our fantasies.
519
00:35:28,163 --> 00:35:31,633
I mean, I've never seen anything wrong with that.
It's just...
520
00:35:32,723 --> 00:35:36,477
when you start putting them into practice
is when it gets dangerous.
521
00:35:39,083 --> 00:35:42,120
Don't know if you're involved
with anyone at the moment, Gil.
522
00:35:42,203 --> 00:35:45,752
Well, maybe something in the pipeline.
Who knows?
523
00:35:48,403 --> 00:35:52,237
It's just so hard, you know, in this world.
524
00:35:54,323 --> 00:35:57,395
I mean, don't you ever wonder sometimes?
525
00:35:57,483 --> 00:36:02,238
What are the chances
you'll ever meet that one human being...
526
00:36:02,803 --> 00:36:05,237
who's just really right for you?
527
00:36:05,323 --> 00:36:07,359
And so perfect?
528
00:36:08,003 --> 00:36:11,200
Not perfect in themselves but...
529
00:36:11,283 --> 00:36:12,921
perfect for you.
530
00:36:13,003 --> 00:36:16,962
So you know that whatever happens,
they'll see it through your eyes
531
00:36:17,043 --> 00:36:19,034
and you'll see it through theirs.
532
00:36:19,123 --> 00:36:22,593
And there isn't anything life can throw at you
533
00:36:22,683 --> 00:36:25,197
that you won't get through together.
534
00:36:26,723 --> 00:36:29,191
I mean, I really used to believe that...
535
00:36:30,083 --> 00:36:32,677
in my soppy girlie way.
536
00:36:34,363 --> 00:36:38,322
That there was one person
fate had put on earth for each of us.
537
00:36:39,603 --> 00:36:41,912
And that with Bob I'd found him.
538
00:36:46,123 --> 00:36:48,557
But, of course, the awful thing is...
539
00:36:50,443 --> 00:36:52,434
that person could exist...
540
00:36:54,643 --> 00:36:57,111
and we may never get to meet them.
541
00:37:01,523 --> 00:37:03,479
Here we go again.
542
00:37:09,963 --> 00:37:12,113
IRENE: Hello? Yes.
543
00:37:13,323 --> 00:37:16,599
Please, don't you dare start up
with all that bullshit
544
00:37:16,683 --> 00:37:19,277
because it's all bullshit and you know it.
545
00:37:19,363 --> 00:37:22,799
Really? Well, you can just forget that idea.
546
00:37:22,883 --> 00:37:26,193
No chance. You've said all there is to be said, Bob,
547
00:37:26,283 --> 00:37:28,638
and if you want to collect
the rest if your things tomorrow,
548
00:37:28,723 --> 00:37:30,679
they'll be in a box on the front lawn.
549
00:37:30,763 --> 00:37:34,756
Don't give me all that whinging hypocritical crap.
550
00:37:34,843 --> 00:37:37,311
What am I? Some kind of moron?
551
00:37:37,403 --> 00:37:39,963
God, I can't believe I could have been so naive.
552
00:37:40,043 --> 00:37:44,639
All this time, you lying, underhand piece of shit!
553
00:37:45,923 --> 00:37:49,199
For God's sake, don't waste your breath.
554
00:37:50,123 --> 00:37:53,115
Well, I'm sorry, I don't want to talk about it.
555
00:37:53,243 --> 00:37:57,122
Because I don't want to talk about it
and you needn't bother ringing again
556
00:37:57,203 --> 00:37:59,478
because I won't be answering!
557
00:38:02,963 --> 00:38:06,512
Er, look, I've got some work
to catch up on actually
558
00:38:06,603 --> 00:38:09,071
and lunch with my agent tomorrow, in town.
559
00:38:09,163 --> 00:38:11,040
So that's going be half the day gone.
560
00:38:11,123 --> 00:38:12,841
Okay, well.
561
00:38:12,923 --> 00:38:16,199
Thanks for all your concern, anyway, about me.
562
00:38:16,283 --> 00:38:19,878
And, you know, don't be a stranger.
563
00:40:53,283 --> 00:40:55,035
GINA: Stop it, now it's hurting.
564
00:40:56,843 --> 00:41:00,916
- I think I'm getting a stitch.
- Hurting? By this time, I'm about to implode.
565
00:41:01,003 --> 00:41:03,961
- And then when I get in there...
- You couldn't do it because...
566
00:41:04,043 --> 00:41:08,241
Anatomically, it's like,
it just switched over to the other channel.
567
00:41:08,323 --> 00:41:11,554
And then of course,
the more you try and make it go away,
568
00:41:11,643 --> 00:41:13,201
the worse it gets.
569
00:41:13,283 --> 00:41:15,080
You know, as I'm standing there,
570
00:41:15,163 --> 00:41:17,996
thinking about chess problems
and Ernest Borgnine.
571
00:41:18,083 --> 00:41:21,553
You see, this is what
you should be putting in the script.
572
00:41:21,643 --> 00:41:24,953
I've always said the best comedy
is based on truth and observation.
573
00:41:25,043 --> 00:41:26,715
Yeah, I can hear the calls now.
574
00:41:26,803 --> 00:41:28,998
"I don't pay my licence fee
to watch people getting
575
00:41:29,083 --> 00:41:32,234
"involuntary erections at funerals.
Thank you very much.
576
00:41:33,243 --> 00:41:35,962
"You're just another example of lazy writing."
577
00:41:36,763 --> 00:41:41,041
Have you noticed how the phrase "lazy writing"
has itself become an example of lazy writing?
578
00:41:42,683 --> 00:41:45,641
And what's ironic, of course,
if she hadn't said that to me the other night,
579
00:41:45,723 --> 00:41:47,520
I'd probably never have noticed.
580
00:41:47,603 --> 00:41:50,117
Oh, this is your neighbour
who's just thrown her husband out.
581
00:41:50,203 --> 00:41:53,195
You want to watch yourself there,
now she's a single woman again.
582
00:41:53,283 --> 00:41:55,558
Hey, you do not know of what you speak.
583
00:41:55,643 --> 00:42:00,034
I tell you, when she said, "We all have
our fantasies," she wasn't kidding.
584
00:42:00,123 --> 00:42:04,639
I mean, if someone had cloned your face
onto their partner's body in a photo,
585
00:42:04,723 --> 00:42:07,078
how worried do you think I should be about that?
586
00:42:07,163 --> 00:42:09,438
- You are joking?
- It was in a bag full of trash
587
00:42:09,523 --> 00:42:11,912
of stuff she was throwing out. But I mean...
588
00:42:12,003 --> 00:42:15,075
It was like a picture of me cuddling up to her
589
00:42:15,163 --> 00:42:17,552
that she'd put together on the computer.
590
00:42:17,683 --> 00:42:21,642
I mean, I didn't say anything,
I wouldn't have known what to say,
591
00:42:21,723 --> 00:42:23,839
but kind of weird, don't you think?
592
00:42:24,643 --> 00:42:28,636
Sounds as if there were a few cracks
appearing on both sides of the marriage.
593
00:42:28,723 --> 00:42:31,521
Well, I don't know, she had just got this camera.
594
00:42:31,603 --> 00:42:34,276
She was probably just like a child with a new toy,
595
00:42:34,363 --> 00:42:36,718
playing around, seeing what she could do with it.
596
00:42:36,803 --> 00:42:39,033
I mean, and she had just thrown it away.
597
00:42:39,123 --> 00:42:42,081
So, maybe I shouldn't read too much into it.
598
00:43:18,323 --> 00:43:22,635
God, this is the place to be, isn't it?
Not like my chicken coop.
599
00:43:23,123 --> 00:43:25,876
It's seen better days obviously.
600
00:43:25,963 --> 00:43:29,922
My grandfather first moved here
after the war and, I mean, you know,
601
00:43:30,003 --> 00:43:32,119
I try and keep it ticking over.
602
00:43:32,963 --> 00:43:35,477
How long were you away for, then, in the army?
603
00:43:35,563 --> 00:43:39,158
- Bet you couldn't wait to get back.
- Fourteen years in uniform.
604
00:43:40,243 --> 00:43:42,996
Knocks a lot of sense into you, you know,
605
00:43:43,083 --> 00:43:45,722
when you just wake up one day to the reality of it.
606
00:43:46,763 --> 00:43:51,439
Politicians, it suits their purposes
to paint you all as heroes but...
607
00:43:51,523 --> 00:43:55,118
you'd be surprised how few of us
Join up for the posthumous recognition.
608
00:43:56,243 --> 00:43:58,313
So you saw a lot of action?
609
00:43:59,403 --> 00:44:02,520
Unfortunately, so did my wife, while I was gone.
610
00:44:02,603 --> 00:44:04,480
And after she moved out,
611
00:44:04,563 --> 00:44:08,841
there weren't a whole lot of options open to me,
so eventually got into this game.
612
00:44:10,123 --> 00:44:13,274
And how many other customers
have you invited round for dinner?
613
00:44:13,363 --> 00:44:15,558
Don't suppose I'm the first.
614
00:44:15,643 --> 00:44:17,395
I'll be honest,
615
00:44:17,483 --> 00:44:21,158
after what Sharon did to me,
it was such a kick in the teeth,
616
00:44:21,243 --> 00:44:24,633
I just thought, "Do I really want to
put myself through that whole..."
617
00:44:24,723 --> 00:44:26,793
Game of soldiers.
618
00:44:26,883 --> 00:44:29,875
I mean, I don't know, because...
619
00:44:29,963 --> 00:44:34,434
I just think the chances for me now
that something's actually going to...
620
00:44:34,523 --> 00:44:36,320
work out, you know...
621
00:44:37,403 --> 00:44:38,882
But then again...
622
00:44:38,963 --> 00:44:40,715
Most of us need the eggs.
623
00:44:41,363 --> 00:44:44,355
No, it's... Didn't you ever? Annie Hall.
624
00:44:44,803 --> 00:44:48,762
The way we're all still drawn
into relationships over and over again.
625
00:44:48,843 --> 00:44:52,631
Even though we know
it's complete insanity most of the time.
626
00:44:53,003 --> 00:44:54,880
We're gluttons for punishment.
627
00:44:57,643 --> 00:45:00,521
Oh, those potatoes aren't burning, are they?
628
00:45:00,603 --> 00:45:02,036
Oh, God.
629
00:45:02,883 --> 00:45:06,080
I went out with a girl from Montana one time,
630
00:45:06,163 --> 00:45:08,233
who was a real, you know,
631
00:45:08,323 --> 00:45:11,281
Rocky Mountain, country type of girl.
632
00:45:11,883 --> 00:45:15,398
With, you know, I think I would describe it
as a rustic sexuality.
633
00:45:15,763 --> 00:45:18,994
You know, her underarm hair was all in pigtails.
634
00:45:20,723 --> 00:45:22,759
And with the gingham teeth.
635
00:45:22,843 --> 00:45:24,561
Looked really cute, you know.
636
00:45:24,643 --> 00:45:27,715
And I went back one night.
637
00:45:27,803 --> 00:45:31,682
She invited me back to her log cabin in the forest.
638
00:45:32,163 --> 00:45:33,994
And I said to her,
639
00:45:34,083 --> 00:45:36,472
"I think you should know this about me,
640
00:45:36,563 --> 00:45:39,760
"because it's something you're going to
have to deal with,
641
00:45:39,843 --> 00:45:42,277
"that I am like an animal in bed."
642
00:45:42,843 --> 00:45:45,232
So she got out her gun and shot me.
643
00:45:46,443 --> 00:45:50,038
So what are you telling me,
you have feelings for him, are you serious?
644
00:45:50,123 --> 00:45:52,000
Based on what?
645
00:45:52,083 --> 00:45:55,280
You know, he has absolutely no contact
with his audience.
646
00:45:55,363 --> 00:45:56,716
No warmth.
647
00:45:56,803 --> 00:45:59,556
Jesus, you come to my show, it's real funny, right?
648
00:45:59,643 --> 00:46:01,281
You have a good time.
649
00:46:01,363 --> 00:46:03,672
This guy, you know, he can't open his mouth
650
00:46:03,763 --> 00:46:08,473
without it's all bleakness and misery
and premonitions of doom.
651
00:46:08,963 --> 00:46:11,682
You know, you have sex with me, you get all that.
652
00:46:11,803 --> 00:46:14,795
Will you hush your mouth? He's about to start.
653
00:46:14,923 --> 00:46:17,676
Hush my mouth?
What are we, in downtown Dixieland?
654
00:46:18,323 --> 00:46:21,281
You should lay off the grits. I think I told you that.
655
00:46:24,083 --> 00:46:26,643
♪ One time I came upon
656
00:46:26,723 --> 00:46:29,874
♪ A crooked canyon in the east
657
00:46:30,803 --> 00:46:33,636
♪ Far from the frozen bone yards
658
00:46:33,723 --> 00:46:36,476
♪ Where the kings and prophets feast
659
00:46:37,243 --> 00:46:40,201
♪ The buzzards they were circling
660
00:46:40,283 --> 00:46:43,355
♪ As the Prince of Fools came by
661
00:46:43,443 --> 00:46:46,799
♪ And bared his broken teeth to grin
662
00:46:46,883 --> 00:46:50,273
♪ Whilst pointing at the sky
663
00:46:50,363 --> 00:46:52,718
♪ And in the temple no one wept
664
00:46:52,803 --> 00:46:56,318
♪ But for a blinded child
665
00:46:56,403 --> 00:47:00,157
♪ Who fled to where a hundred broken bodies
666
00:47:00,243 --> 00:47:02,234
♪ Were all piled
667
00:47:02,323 --> 00:47:05,315
♪ And cried into a hurricane
668
00:47:05,403 --> 00:47:08,122
♪ That from the west did blow
669
00:47:08,203 --> 00:47:11,479
♪ Saying I have seen the future that
670
00:47:11,563 --> 00:47:14,760
♪ No man will ever know ♪
671
00:47:35,683 --> 00:47:37,992
So, anyway, you weren't bored?
672
00:47:38,403 --> 00:47:39,677
I'm sorry?
673
00:47:39,763 --> 00:47:41,958
I just worry the subtext could be clearer.
674
00:47:42,043 --> 00:47:46,639
You know, that the clown will always lose out
to the poet who's going to steal the girl
675
00:47:46,723 --> 00:47:49,635
because he's got depth and mystery.
676
00:47:49,723 --> 00:47:52,920
Because. You know, you capture their mind,
you capture their heart.
677
00:47:53,683 --> 00:47:55,799
Well, there I'd take issue with you
678
00:47:55,883 --> 00:47:57,839
because don't they say that
679
00:47:57,923 --> 00:48:00,198
laughter is a great aphrodisiac?
680
00:48:00,843 --> 00:48:02,435
Hmm, don't know.
681
00:48:02,523 --> 00:48:05,356
Would you rather go to
bed with Keats or Laurel and Hardy?
682
00:48:05,443 --> 00:48:08,799
Personally, I'd rather go to bed...
683
00:48:15,003 --> 00:48:18,040
My flatmate. Hi, Mel, what's up?
684
00:48:22,923 --> 00:48:24,322
When?
685
00:48:26,283 --> 00:48:27,716
Oh, God.
686
00:48:29,683 --> 00:48:31,992
Oh, dear.
687
00:48:33,443 --> 00:48:35,354
Did you see it happen?
688
00:48:37,283 --> 00:48:38,762
No, no.
689
00:48:40,683 --> 00:48:43,243
Okay. What can you do?
690
00:48:46,763 --> 00:48:48,594
Thanks for calling.
691
00:48:49,443 --> 00:48:50,558
Bye.
692
00:48:53,803 --> 00:48:55,600
Bad news?
693
00:48:55,683 --> 00:48:57,514
My cat's been run over.
694
00:48:59,003 --> 00:49:01,722
- Oh, shit.
- Yeah, I know.
695
00:49:02,923 --> 00:49:05,642
I had him five years, since he was born.
696
00:49:06,123 --> 00:49:09,354
- My longest-ever relationship.
- Oh, God.
697
00:49:09,443 --> 00:49:10,796
Yeah.
698
00:49:14,883 --> 00:49:16,362
Oh, dear.
699
00:49:19,723 --> 00:49:20,917
Oh, well.
700
00:49:26,283 --> 00:49:27,432
So...
701
00:49:29,083 --> 00:49:30,880
where were we?
702
00:49:47,363 --> 00:49:51,151
- What breed was he?
- Sorry?
703
00:49:52,563 --> 00:49:56,351
Oh. Just big old moggie, you know.
704
00:50:12,643 --> 00:50:16,682
- What's the matter?
- No, I'm just...
705
00:50:18,283 --> 00:50:20,239
- Sorry.
- Are you okay?
706
00:50:20,323 --> 00:50:23,838
Yes, thanks. I'm okay.
707
00:50:27,523 --> 00:50:30,162
I mean, five, you know.
708
00:50:32,003 --> 00:50:33,800
That's no age at all.
709
00:50:36,283 --> 00:50:39,719
No. I guess not.
710
00:50:41,563 --> 00:50:44,555
No, I don't even know now how I got into retail.
711
00:50:44,643 --> 00:50:46,918
Just always been a bit of a drifter, I suppose.
712
00:50:47,003 --> 00:50:50,234
Gadding about too much early on
when I should have been putting down roots.
713
00:50:50,323 --> 00:50:53,838
I mean, they're a lovely bunch,
do anything for you, incredibly loyal.
714
00:50:55,043 --> 00:50:56,761
But sometimes it's like...
715
00:50:56,843 --> 00:50:59,403
they could be talking Martian
for all the sense they make.
716
00:50:59,483 --> 00:51:02,236
There's one of them been trying to
pair me off with this bloke
717
00:51:02,323 --> 00:51:03,915
who comes in the store.
718
00:51:04,003 --> 00:51:08,121
Who's very nice, as it happens,
but apparently, likes women's feet.
719
00:51:09,883 --> 00:51:12,397
So, today there's this
big discussion going on about
720
00:51:12,483 --> 00:51:14,235
what the technical term for that is.
721
00:51:14,323 --> 00:51:16,393
Is he a "paedophile"
722
00:51:16,483 --> 00:51:18,838
- or a "pedestriophile"?
- Okay.
723
00:51:18,923 --> 00:51:21,517
Either way, he's likely to get
a petrol bomb through his door.
724
00:51:21,603 --> 00:51:24,071
So I'd do well to avoid him.
725
00:51:24,163 --> 00:51:25,676
Oh, God.
726
00:51:25,763 --> 00:51:28,072
And every day I have to listen to this.
727
00:51:29,603 --> 00:51:32,356
You feel like you're the only sane voice
in a mad world.
728
00:51:32,443 --> 00:51:34,081
That's exactly it.
729
00:51:34,163 --> 00:51:37,200
Little kid does his toilet job out the window.
730
00:51:37,283 --> 00:51:38,875
You try and complain.
731
00:51:38,963 --> 00:51:41,238
- You're accused of harassment.
- I know.
732
00:51:41,323 --> 00:51:45,077
And look at that bloke who attacked your father.
God rest his soul.
733
00:51:45,163 --> 00:51:47,631
You knew who it was and he gets away with it.
734
00:51:47,723 --> 00:51:50,032
That must have been very hard to take.
735
00:51:51,323 --> 00:51:54,793
- It was hard, yeah.
- Should have been put away for 10 years at least.
736
00:51:54,883 --> 00:51:57,158
And he's still walking round scot-free.
737
00:51:58,163 --> 00:52:00,438
How can that be right?
738
00:52:04,123 --> 00:52:08,275
ALICE: Well, now I've seen a live barn owl,
I think my life is definitely complete.
739
00:52:12,283 --> 00:52:14,877
Ooh, what have you got for me in here?
740
00:52:15,483 --> 00:52:18,361
Something you might get a little kick out of.
741
00:52:18,443 --> 00:52:20,718
- Come here.
- It's not going to bite me?
742
00:52:23,123 --> 00:52:26,195
Look, I know we only met
for the first time yesterday, Alice.
743
00:52:26,283 --> 00:52:30,117
But I think you know, don't you,
when someone's on your wavelength.
744
00:52:30,883 --> 00:52:32,282
Well.
745
00:52:33,003 --> 00:52:35,312
We see eye to eye on a few things.
746
00:52:35,403 --> 00:52:37,963
And I think we'll see eye to eye on this thing.
747
00:52:56,523 --> 00:52:59,720
You said 10 years, I thought 15.
748
00:53:00,163 --> 00:53:02,961
Which means he's got just under 14 left to serve.
749
00:53:03,443 --> 00:53:07,277
Way I see it is if we get no joy from the courts,
750
00:53:07,363 --> 00:53:11,038
it is down to us to make our own justice.
751
00:53:12,003 --> 00:53:16,281
Isn't that right, Jeffrey Gordon Blunstone?
752
00:53:16,363 --> 00:53:20,038
You bastard! You're insane, you are.
A bloody mental case!
753
00:53:20,483 --> 00:53:24,442
Can't you see what he's done?
You can't keep me here, it's illegal!
754
00:53:25,283 --> 00:53:28,081
Let me out, you bloody psycho! Let me out!
755
00:53:28,483 --> 00:53:30,917
You can't keep me here. Tell him.
756
00:53:32,363 --> 00:53:35,082
It's getting a bit chilly now. You fancy a coffee?
757
00:54:13,523 --> 00:54:14,922
Here, here, look!
758
00:54:19,483 --> 00:54:21,280
Hey, you, leave my dog alone.
759
00:54:42,923 --> 00:54:46,199
Gosh, you have no idea
what that smile of his does to me.
760
00:54:46,283 --> 00:54:48,433
I think we've got a pretty good idea.
761
00:54:50,043 --> 00:54:51,192
Sorry?
762
00:54:51,283 --> 00:54:55,162
Think he wasn't so much smiling
as doubling up, Cleo. He's not the only one.
763
00:54:58,083 --> 00:55:00,677
That's never happened before. God!
764
00:55:07,843 --> 00:55:09,674
Ali, you just missed it.
765
00:55:09,763 --> 00:55:13,438
You know that fellow that she fancies
over there, he was just at the...
766
00:55:13,523 --> 00:55:15,673
What's happened? What's the matter?
767
00:55:16,603 --> 00:55:19,401
You're not still moping
about that nutter the other night?
768
00:55:20,523 --> 00:55:23,879
The man who gives me a lift
to the station every day...
769
00:55:23,963 --> 00:55:27,035
some yob tried to steal his car the other morning
770
00:55:27,123 --> 00:55:29,956
and his dog was still in the back.
771
00:55:30,043 --> 00:55:33,240
- Jumped up and bit his ear off.
- Well, good for him.
772
00:55:33,843 --> 00:55:35,993
I know, except...
773
00:55:36,083 --> 00:55:38,438
Frank just rang me, he said...
774
00:55:39,963 --> 00:55:41,954
he'd just had a letter.
775
00:55:42,523 --> 00:55:45,640
They're saying the dog's got to be destroyed.
776
00:55:48,803 --> 00:55:51,078
What is wrong with this world?
777
00:55:54,843 --> 00:55:58,802
Well, actually not that well right now.
778
00:55:58,883 --> 00:56:03,081
I thought I had something,
but now it's all unravelling in my head
779
00:56:03,163 --> 00:56:06,917
and, as usual, I'm losing faith
in the whole premise so...
780
00:56:10,483 --> 00:56:13,156
Listen, last Friday night...
781
00:56:14,323 --> 00:56:16,393
ended on a bit of a strange note.
782
00:56:17,123 --> 00:56:20,320
I'm sorry about that. Sometimes I just get this...
783
00:56:21,123 --> 00:56:24,479
I don't know what it is, sense of alienation that...
784
00:56:24,563 --> 00:56:27,555
But listen, I was wondering if you wanted...
785
00:56:31,803 --> 00:56:33,839
Oh! Really?
786
00:56:37,603 --> 00:56:41,073
Okay. Is that someone you just met or...
787
00:56:45,283 --> 00:56:49,435
No, no, there's no need for you
to feel bad about anything.
788
00:56:51,883 --> 00:56:56,081
As someone said, you never can tell
where your heart's going to take you so...
789
00:56:57,803 --> 00:57:01,273
But let me take a wild guess,
he's got to be a poet, right?
790
00:57:08,123 --> 00:57:11,559
GIL: I don't know,
the mysteries of sexual attraction.
791
00:57:11,843 --> 00:57:14,357
I guess I'll never manage to fathom.
792
00:57:14,803 --> 00:57:17,192
And now I'm going to have that awful feeling.
793
00:57:17,643 --> 00:57:19,918
Where she's eating away at me inside,
794
00:57:20,003 --> 00:57:23,313
invading every thought in my head
every minute of the day.
795
00:57:23,403 --> 00:57:24,995
Face it, you know,
796
00:57:25,083 --> 00:57:29,679
there aren't too many people out there who are
going to take on a major basket case like you.
797
00:57:30,363 --> 00:57:33,560
It's like it was such a little thing, surely.
798
00:57:35,123 --> 00:57:37,842
Why did you have to go and blow it like that?
799
00:57:40,643 --> 00:57:43,237
ALICE: Maybe he had the right idea after all.
800
00:57:43,323 --> 00:57:46,998
Doesn't seem to matter who does what,
we're all punished for it in the end.
801
00:57:47,803 --> 00:57:50,237
God, he was such an athlete as well,
by the look of him.
802
00:57:50,323 --> 00:57:53,474
I probably missed out
on the experience of a lifetime there.
803
00:57:54,083 --> 00:57:56,756
Yes, or he could have snapped my spine.
804
00:57:58,723 --> 00:58:02,318
Anyway, I'm sure it pays
to keep trying different things.
805
00:58:05,163 --> 00:58:08,200
I must remember
to get some more milk tomorrow.
806
00:58:17,323 --> 00:58:19,883
And I think I'm out of eggs.
70983
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