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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 2 00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:36,031 Subtitles by explosiveskull 3 00:00:54,762 --> 00:00:57,663 I swear she's older than my mom. 4 00:00:57,665 --> 00:01:00,034 Fucking kill me if I'm still doing this at her age. 5 00:01:02,335 --> 00:01:05,540 Kill you now if you ask me nicely. 6 00:01:07,374 --> 00:01:09,206 You know we're not allowed to eat or drink in here. 7 00:01:09,208 --> 00:01:12,444 - Yeah. - Oh, fuck off. 8 00:01:12,446 --> 00:01:14,245 What did you say? 9 00:01:14,247 --> 00:01:17,351 Uh, I believe I said, "Oh, fuck off." 10 00:01:18,351 --> 00:01:19,720 Pack up. 11 00:01:22,523 --> 00:01:24,155 I'm almost finished 12 00:01:24,157 --> 00:01:26,027 - with this document. - Now. 13 00:02:25,652 --> 00:02:27,117 Ugh. 14 00:03:02,156 --> 00:03:03,591 Psst-psst. 15 00:03:04,791 --> 00:03:06,627 Come on. 16 00:03:15,502 --> 00:03:17,870 Since when did you get picky? 17 00:03:17,872 --> 00:03:18,940 Hmm? 18 00:03:40,527 --> 00:03:41,796 Hey, taxi! 19 00:04:06,353 --> 00:04:08,154 Oh, thank you. 20 00:04:11,891 --> 00:04:14,626 But then there was nobody left, 21 00:04:14,628 --> 00:04:18,095 and I was standing by myself. 22 00:04:18,097 --> 00:04:20,465 And how long until your next book will come out? 23 00:04:20,467 --> 00:04:22,633 Good question. Uh... 24 00:04:22,635 --> 00:04:24,635 Well, this is a surprise. 25 00:04:24,637 --> 00:04:26,705 You invited me, did you not? 26 00:04:26,707 --> 00:04:28,573 You didn't reply. 27 00:04:28,575 --> 00:04:30,075 Coat check? 28 00:04:30,077 --> 00:04:32,847 At my party, we just threw the coats on the bed. 29 00:04:33,580 --> 00:04:35,280 Good to see you, too, Lee. 30 00:04:35,282 --> 00:04:37,683 You never called me back, and I... 31 00:04:37,685 --> 00:04:39,650 I have new ideas. 32 00:04:39,652 --> 00:04:41,254 Is this why you came? 33 00:04:42,022 --> 00:04:44,556 - Yeah. - Well, I'm glad you're here. 34 00:04:44,558 --> 00:04:45,857 Try to have a good time. 35 00:04:45,859 --> 00:04:49,227 I like interviews. Don't get me wrong. 36 00:04:49,229 --> 00:04:53,732 I just wish that you could get it all done at once. 37 00:05:03,710 --> 00:05:04,910 Did you read it? It was... 38 00:05:04,912 --> 00:05:06,710 I haven't missed a day of writing 39 00:05:06,712 --> 00:05:09,147 for the past 25 years. 40 00:05:09,149 --> 00:05:11,148 And do you ever have trouble beginning? 41 00:05:11,150 --> 00:05:14,652 I don't subscribe to the notion of writer's block. 42 00:05:14,654 --> 00:05:16,487 You never experience it? 43 00:05:16,489 --> 00:05:17,688 Writer's block is a term 44 00:05:17,690 --> 00:05:19,624 invented by the writing community 45 00:05:19,626 --> 00:05:21,659 to justify their laziness. 46 00:05:21,661 --> 00:05:22,926 My success is nothing more than 47 00:05:22,928 --> 00:05:24,462 that I have the determination and stamina 48 00:05:24,464 --> 00:05:26,431 to sit and get the work done. 49 00:05:26,433 --> 00:05:28,967 - It's simple. - Jackass. 50 00:05:28,969 --> 00:05:31,236 I mean, I find his distaste 51 00:05:31,238 --> 00:05:34,775 for linear plot structure downright macabre. 52 00:05:57,565 --> 00:05:59,898 Well, that was quick. Did you get properly fed? 53 00:05:59,900 --> 00:06:02,167 This week, will you return my call? 54 00:06:02,169 --> 00:06:03,934 Sure. We'll see. 55 00:06:03,936 --> 00:06:06,571 I'm working on a lot of fascinating projects. 56 00:06:06,573 --> 00:06:09,573 I just need my agent to call me back. 57 00:06:09,575 --> 00:06:11,109 I don't think the world is waiting 58 00:06:11,111 --> 00:06:13,677 for another Fanny Brice biography, Lee. 59 00:06:13,679 --> 00:06:15,013 And we may disagree 60 00:06:15,015 --> 00:06:17,918 on what is considered fascinating. 61 00:06:18,652 --> 00:06:19,652 Good night. 62 00:06:20,387 --> 00:06:23,054 Why do you have mostly-used toilet paper rolls 63 00:06:23,056 --> 00:06:24,891 in the cabinet in your bathroom? 64 00:06:26,058 --> 00:06:28,928 So that the guests can have a full roll. 65 00:06:29,662 --> 00:06:31,865 Well, that's batshit, Marjorie. 66 00:06:42,243 --> 00:06:45,510 I lost my ticket, but that's my coat over there. 67 00:06:45,512 --> 00:06:47,415 There on the end. 68 00:06:51,952 --> 00:06:54,321 Have a good night, ma'am. 69 00:07:18,178 --> 00:07:20,378 You'll be a very rich man. 70 00:07:31,959 --> 00:07:33,592 We'll talk about it in a few years. 71 00:07:33,594 --> 00:07:35,927 I want to talk about it now! 72 00:07:35,929 --> 00:07:37,528 There are lots of things to consider. 73 00:07:37,530 --> 00:07:39,097 After all, they are first cousins. 74 00:07:39,099 --> 00:07:40,931 Well, that's not unusual, our grandmother 75 00:07:40,933 --> 00:07:42,568 and grandfather were first cousins. 76 00:07:42,570 --> 00:07:44,035 Yes, and look at us. 77 00:07:50,844 --> 00:07:52,710 Here, Jersey girl. 78 00:07:52,712 --> 00:07:55,780 I brought your favorite. I brought you shrimpy. 79 00:07:55,782 --> 00:07:57,818 Hmm? Come on. It's your favorite. 80 00:08:00,486 --> 00:08:05,525 Very well. I assure yo, Oscar, I will think about it.. 81 00:08:11,397 --> 00:08:14,599 So, you still have a balance, Miss Israel. 82 00:08:14,601 --> 00:08:16,667 Yeah, I'm aware of that. 83 00:08:16,669 --> 00:08:20,371 But she's really sick and she's very old. 84 00:08:20,373 --> 00:08:22,107 I'm sorry, but the doctor told me that 85 00:08:22,109 --> 00:08:23,674 I need to have at least half the balance 86 00:08:23,676 --> 00:08:25,345 before I do any tests. 87 00:08:26,813 --> 00:08:29,181 Didn't you people take a Hippocratic oath? 88 00:08:29,183 --> 00:08:31,549 You owe us $82. 89 00:08:31,551 --> 00:08:34,053 God. Wow. 90 00:08:43,364 --> 00:08:45,933 You know, if she did come out here, she'd see this. 91 00:08:51,871 --> 00:08:54,538 All right, I have $14. 92 00:08:54,540 --> 00:08:56,976 I'm sorry, but I can't. 93 00:08:59,178 --> 00:09:01,048 No, we need half the balance. 94 00:09:20,299 --> 00:09:21,599 God... 95 00:09:21,601 --> 00:09:22,937 Asshole. 96 00:09:34,347 --> 00:09:36,851 Okay. Just these. 97 00:09:37,918 --> 00:09:41,152 Come on, man. I schlepped these all the way here. 98 00:09:41,154 --> 00:09:42,921 I'll give you two dollars. 99 00:09:42,923 --> 00:09:44,922 I don't want the others. 100 00:09:44,924 --> 00:09:46,257 I don't even need that much. 101 00:09:46,259 --> 00:09:48,793 I just don't want to carry them around anymore. 102 00:09:48,795 --> 00:09:50,628 I got a sick cat, and I... 103 00:09:50,630 --> 00:09:52,497 I told you I don't want the others. 104 00:09:52,499 --> 00:09:54,132 There's people waiting. 105 00:09:54,134 --> 00:09:57,000 You know, you don't have to be so disrespectful. 106 00:09:57,002 --> 00:09:59,939 Okay? You have actually carried my books here. 107 00:10:00,807 --> 00:10:01,973 And you are? 108 00:10:01,975 --> 00:10:04,075 I'm Lee Israel. 109 00:10:04,077 --> 00:10:06,845 Oh, Miss Israel. We have copies 110 00:10:06,847 --> 00:10:08,948 of your latest work right over there. 111 00:10:12,419 --> 00:10:13,718 You're a rude little ape. 112 00:10:13,720 --> 00:10:14,786 Okay, get your garbage 113 00:10:14,788 --> 00:10:16,457 - off my counter. - No! 114 00:10:31,871 --> 00:10:33,870 - Miss Israel? - Hi, Andrei. 115 00:10:33,872 --> 00:10:35,339 It's been three months. 116 00:10:35,341 --> 00:10:37,808 I know. I'm sorry. I'm working on it. 117 00:10:37,810 --> 00:10:39,645 I don't want to call the management. 118 00:10:40,446 --> 00:10:43,580 Can you just cut me a little slack? I'm... 119 00:10:43,582 --> 00:10:46,683 going through a rough patch, and I just lost my job. 120 00:10:46,685 --> 00:10:48,420 I think it was ageism. 121 00:10:48,422 --> 00:10:50,153 You've been here longer than I have, 122 00:10:50,155 --> 00:10:52,926 and you've been kind to my mother. 123 00:10:53,994 --> 00:10:56,594 - Just get it to me soon. - I will. 124 00:10:56,596 --> 00:10:58,465 Absolutely. Thank you. 125 00:11:00,699 --> 00:11:02,499 Uh, hey, in the meantime, 126 00:11:02,501 --> 00:11:04,668 do you think you could send an exterminator 127 00:11:04,670 --> 00:11:06,071 up to my apartment? 128 00:11:06,073 --> 00:11:08,608 I have an untenable fly situation. 129 00:11:35,534 --> 00:11:37,469 Good afternoon, darling. 130 00:11:37,471 --> 00:11:39,336 Hey, Jack Handsome. 131 00:11:39,338 --> 00:11:41,105 Can I have a beer, pretty please? 132 00:11:41,107 --> 00:11:43,142 I don't know. Can you? 133 00:11:49,848 --> 00:11:51,950 Lee Israel? 134 00:11:54,654 --> 00:11:56,388 It's Jack Hock. 135 00:11:56,390 --> 00:11:58,922 Last time I saw you... Thank you. 136 00:11:58,924 --> 00:12:01,024 We were both pleasantly pissed 137 00:12:01,026 --> 00:12:02,726 at some horrible book party. 138 00:12:02,728 --> 00:12:03,728 Am I right? 139 00:12:03,730 --> 00:12:06,697 It's slowly flooding back to me. 140 00:12:06,699 --> 00:12:07,864 Hey, what can I get you? 141 00:12:07,866 --> 00:12:10,200 You're friends with, um, Julia some... 142 00:12:10,202 --> 00:12:11,636 - Steinberg! - Yeah. 143 00:12:11,638 --> 00:12:14,305 She's not an agent anymore. She died. 144 00:12:14,307 --> 00:12:16,608 She did? Jesus, that's young. 145 00:12:16,610 --> 00:12:18,243 Maybe she didn't die. 146 00:12:18,245 --> 00:12:20,878 Maybe she just moved back to the suburbs. 147 00:12:20,880 --> 00:12:22,580 I always confuse those two. 148 00:12:22,582 --> 00:12:23,814 No, that's right. 149 00:12:23,816 --> 00:12:25,749 She got married and had twins. 150 00:12:25,751 --> 00:12:26,984 Better to have died. 151 00:12:26,986 --> 00:12:28,455 Indeed. 152 00:12:34,026 --> 00:12:35,893 I've just come from having my teeth bleached. 153 00:12:35,895 --> 00:12:37,195 How do they look? 154 00:12:37,197 --> 00:12:38,930 Why would you do that? 155 00:12:38,932 --> 00:12:40,834 Oh, teeth are a dead giveaway. 156 00:12:41,500 --> 00:12:44,134 - Okay. - Can I buy you a drink? 157 00:12:44,136 --> 00:12:45,870 Even though you're the posh writer? 158 00:12:45,872 --> 00:12:47,370 - Thank you. - Craigy? 159 00:12:47,372 --> 00:12:48,641 - Yeah? - Top her up. 160 00:12:50,409 --> 00:12:52,442 You know, I keep trying to remember 161 00:12:52,444 --> 00:12:55,178 that party that you mentioned. 162 00:12:55,180 --> 00:12:57,816 And something keeps flashing in my head. 163 00:12:57,818 --> 00:12:59,050 I know something happened, 164 00:12:59,052 --> 00:13:01,585 but I can't seem to put my finger on it. 165 00:13:01,587 --> 00:13:03,089 Bad shrimp? 166 00:13:03,689 --> 00:13:06,659 - Here you go. - Jack Hock, you said, huh? 167 00:13:07,427 --> 00:13:10,494 That's me. The renegade, the rebel. 168 00:13:10,496 --> 00:13:12,466 Jack Hock, big cock. 169 00:13:13,900 --> 00:13:15,568 I'm sure it'll come back to me. 170 00:13:17,404 --> 00:13:19,706 How's old life been treating you? 171 00:13:20,073 --> 00:13:21,406 I can honestly boast 172 00:13:21,408 --> 00:13:23,644 that I'm banned from Crosby Street Booksellers. 173 00:13:26,746 --> 00:13:29,180 I'm banned from Duane Reade. 174 00:13:29,182 --> 00:13:30,981 All of them. 175 00:13:30,983 --> 00:13:33,017 I have a little shoplifting problem. 176 00:13:33,019 --> 00:13:35,619 Well, it's all in the past, but, uh, 177 00:13:35,621 --> 00:13:39,824 but for some reason, I have a very memorable mug. 178 00:13:39,826 --> 00:13:41,392 And now I have to take a bus 179 00:13:41,394 --> 00:13:45,432 just to buy shampoo and aspirin and stuff. 180 00:13:46,699 --> 00:13:51,404 I'm joking. Duane Reade's not the only rodeo in town. 181 00:13:52,138 --> 00:13:53,470 You pissed in a closet. 182 00:13:53,472 --> 00:13:57,611 - I did what? - You pissed in a closet. 183 00:13:58,245 --> 00:13:59,976 Now I remember. 184 00:13:59,978 --> 00:14:01,211 Nobody could stop talking 185 00:14:01,213 --> 00:14:03,047 about the handsome English gentleman... 186 00:14:03,049 --> 00:14:04,248 Why, thank you. 187 00:14:04,250 --> 00:14:06,350 ...who was so shit-faced 188 00:14:06,352 --> 00:14:09,688 he mistook the coat closet for the can. 189 00:14:10,423 --> 00:14:12,923 You ruined thousands of dollars' worth of furs. 190 00:14:12,925 --> 00:14:14,258 Well, I... 191 00:14:14,260 --> 00:14:19,129 Those old biddies didn't know what hit 'em. 192 00:14:21,635 --> 00:14:25,637 Oh, their disgusting furs covered in piss. 193 00:14:25,639 --> 00:14:27,971 Dogs followed them home. 194 00:14:34,948 --> 00:14:37,315 I'm glad somebody found it amusing. 195 00:14:37,317 --> 00:14:40,350 Some folks stopped talking to me after that night. 196 00:14:40,352 --> 00:14:43,356 - Well, fuck 'em. - Cheers. 197 00:14:47,459 --> 00:14:49,326 So, do you work, Jack Hock? 198 00:14:49,328 --> 00:14:50,894 Oh, this and that. 199 00:14:50,896 --> 00:14:52,064 Mostly that. 200 00:14:52,731 --> 00:14:55,099 I happen to have some very nice cocaine, 201 00:14:55,101 --> 00:14:56,234 if you're interested. 202 00:14:56,236 --> 00:14:58,235 No, I'm not. 203 00:14:58,237 --> 00:15:00,171 Oh, Jesus, it's not like I have it all the time. 204 00:15:00,173 --> 00:15:02,040 Boy's gotta do what a boy's gotta do. 205 00:15:02,042 --> 00:15:04,274 Anyways, who are you to judge? 206 00:15:04,276 --> 00:15:06,244 It's four in the afternoon, and you're drunk. 207 00:15:06,246 --> 00:15:09,247 - I'm hardly drunk. - Mmm? 208 00:15:09,249 --> 00:15:11,919 It's not "anyways," it's "anyway." 209 00:15:12,885 --> 00:15:15,853 Anyways, let's keep drinking. 210 00:15:15,855 --> 00:15:16,988 The day is young. 211 00:15:24,063 --> 00:15:25,332 Hey! 212 00:15:30,002 --> 00:15:32,405 You getting off at the next stop? 213 00:15:33,005 --> 00:15:35,505 79th. And you? 214 00:15:35,507 --> 00:15:37,242 Yeah, I'll get out there. 215 00:15:37,244 --> 00:15:38,942 Works for me. 216 00:15:41,414 --> 00:15:43,346 I think I saw you at Zabar's once. 217 00:15:43,348 --> 00:15:45,115 You were shouting at someone. 218 00:15:45,117 --> 00:15:47,551 They have terrible customer service. 219 00:15:47,553 --> 00:15:49,823 I shopped there for years. 220 00:15:51,090 --> 00:15:53,594 They've really great bread. 221 00:16:00,866 --> 00:16:02,602 Oh, it's delicious. 222 00:16:03,602 --> 00:16:06,937 - It's really good. - So good. 223 00:16:08,540 --> 00:16:11,209 Oh, my. That's the guy. 224 00:16:11,211 --> 00:16:12,777 Who? 225 00:16:12,779 --> 00:16:14,912 That's the asshole from Crosby Street Bookseller. 226 00:16:14,914 --> 00:16:16,446 No. 227 00:16:16,448 --> 00:16:19,651 - What are the odds of that? - Oh, I love the way you smell. 228 00:16:21,553 --> 00:16:23,921 Pen and paper. Quick, quick, quick. 229 00:16:23,923 --> 00:16:25,259 Why? 230 00:16:27,360 --> 00:16:30,464 - Come on. - I've got... Hang on. I... 231 00:16:47,112 --> 00:16:49,482 - Got it! - Shh! 232 00:16:57,255 --> 00:16:59,255 This is me. 233 00:16:59,257 --> 00:17:00,492 Nice place. 234 00:17:00,494 --> 00:17:04,261 Used to be a lot nicer. How about you? 235 00:17:04,263 --> 00:17:06,033 Couple of blocks along. 236 00:17:08,700 --> 00:17:09,870 Well... 237 00:17:11,437 --> 00:17:14,304 Jack, this was not unpleasant. 238 00:17:14,306 --> 00:17:16,075 See you tomorrow? 239 00:17:16,708 --> 00:17:17,942 You shall. 240 00:18:37,591 --> 00:18:39,456 "Lee, today was to have been 241 00:18:39,458 --> 00:18:41,257 "the Esquire shoot with Spenc. 242 00:18:41,259 --> 00:18:43,461 "Difficult days, these. 243 00:18:43,463 --> 00:18:46,897 "Thank you for your sympathy and understanding. 244 00:18:46,899 --> 00:18:48,698 "Ever yours, Kate. 245 00:18:48,700 --> 00:18:52,704 "P.S. Forgive the splotches. All tears lately." 246 00:18:52,706 --> 00:18:56,109 What a lovely apology. 247 00:18:57,610 --> 00:19:00,880 This is very special. Why would you part with it? 248 00:19:01,380 --> 00:19:02,646 Clutter. 249 00:19:02,648 --> 00:19:05,015 You know, I'm not a very sentimental gal. 250 00:19:05,017 --> 00:19:06,951 Handwritten even. 251 00:19:06,953 --> 00:19:08,485 You're the Lee Israel? 252 00:19:08,487 --> 00:19:10,754 Jesus, is there another one? 253 00:19:10,756 --> 00:19:12,991 I've read your biographies. 254 00:19:12,993 --> 00:19:15,359 - Have you? - You're a wonderful writer. 255 00:19:15,361 --> 00:19:17,028 Thank you. 256 00:19:17,030 --> 00:19:19,696 You might want to remind my publisher. 257 00:19:19,698 --> 00:19:21,765 Well, her letters usually have 258 00:19:21,767 --> 00:19:23,367 the intimacy of a phone book, 259 00:19:23,369 --> 00:19:26,204 but this one is really nice. 260 00:19:26,206 --> 00:19:29,006 How does $175 sound? 261 00:19:29,008 --> 00:19:31,009 Sounds terrific. 262 00:19:40,219 --> 00:19:42,920 I rang you. You didn't ring me back. 263 00:19:42,922 --> 00:19:45,656 - Should I take it personally? - Well, why wouldn't you? 264 00:19:45,658 --> 00:19:47,157 I'd never get out of bed. 265 00:19:47,159 --> 00:19:49,359 Then luckily for me, you did. 266 00:19:49,361 --> 00:19:50,860 I'm coming over to join you. 267 00:19:50,862 --> 00:19:54,633 I'm not good at reading social cues. 268 00:19:55,567 --> 00:19:57,435 Uh, scotch and soda, Craig, 269 00:19:57,437 --> 00:19:59,937 - and I'll buy his next one. - You got it. 270 00:19:59,939 --> 00:20:01,638 Mmm, things are looking up. 271 00:20:01,640 --> 00:20:03,573 Aren't you writing a new book? 272 00:20:03,575 --> 00:20:04,908 About Fanny Brice. 273 00:20:04,910 --> 00:20:06,012 Who? 274 00:20:07,013 --> 00:20:08,212 Fanny Brice. 275 00:20:08,214 --> 00:20:10,984 Just the greatest vaudeville comedian of her time. 276 00:20:12,284 --> 00:20:14,451 You sure you're a fag? 277 00:20:14,453 --> 00:20:16,723 Mm-hmm. 278 00:21:31,497 --> 00:21:33,566 Hmm. 279 00:21:42,175 --> 00:21:46,877 Just recently found out that my cousin, Sidney, 280 00:21:46,879 --> 00:21:50,214 was in possession of this delightful bonne bouche. 281 00:21:50,216 --> 00:21:54,051 And I just thought that you might be interested in it. 282 00:21:54,053 --> 00:21:56,454 Fanny Brice. One of my favorites. 283 00:21:56,456 --> 00:21:58,856 I'm writing a new biography about her. 284 00:21:58,858 --> 00:22:00,690 Well, what a funny coincidence then, 285 00:22:00,692 --> 00:22:02,261 that your cousin had this. 286 00:22:04,362 --> 00:22:07,598 Didn't she say, "Wrong is for other people"? I love that. 287 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:09,669 She did say that. 288 00:22:12,671 --> 00:22:15,238 So, what do you think? 289 00:22:15,240 --> 00:22:16,741 I believe I can sell this. 290 00:22:16,743 --> 00:22:19,642 I could give you $75. 291 00:22:19,644 --> 00:22:21,111 Oh. Uh... 292 00:22:21,113 --> 00:22:23,347 I could give more for better content. 293 00:22:23,349 --> 00:22:25,315 It's a bit bland is all. 294 00:22:25,317 --> 00:22:26,783 True. 295 00:22:26,785 --> 00:22:29,686 Um, well, do you think you could pay in cash? 296 00:22:29,688 --> 00:22:31,957 Oh. Let me see if I have enough. 297 00:22:32,691 --> 00:22:34,926 I'm glad to hear you're writing another book. 298 00:22:34,928 --> 00:22:37,130 I'll be the first to buy it. 299 00:22:38,630 --> 00:22:41,131 Did you hear Tom Clancy is getting paid 300 00:22:41,133 --> 00:22:42,166 three million dollars 301 00:22:42,168 --> 00:22:44,401 to write more right-wing macho bullshit? 302 00:22:44,403 --> 00:22:45,802 Are you kidding me? 303 00:22:45,804 --> 00:22:48,105 That blowhard's getting three million dollars? 304 00:22:48,107 --> 00:22:49,674 Oh, to be a white male 305 00:22:49,676 --> 00:22:52,243 that doesn't even know he's full of crap, right? 306 00:22:52,245 --> 00:22:56,045 I've tried to write a little. Short stories. 307 00:22:56,047 --> 00:22:58,682 I know better than to presume they're any good. 308 00:22:58,684 --> 00:23:01,484 Oh, I can't believe I just admitted that. 309 00:23:01,486 --> 00:23:03,186 I'm sure they're terrible. 310 00:23:03,188 --> 00:23:05,025 They might be. 311 00:23:06,292 --> 00:23:08,358 Or they might not be. 312 00:23:08,360 --> 00:23:10,130 You know, I could take a look. 313 00:23:11,162 --> 00:23:12,295 Really? 314 00:23:12,297 --> 00:23:14,063 I'll be honest. 315 00:23:14,065 --> 00:23:16,266 Unfortunately, I believe you. 316 00:23:16,268 --> 00:23:17,871 $75. 317 00:23:20,407 --> 00:23:22,606 - Ms. Israel! - I hear they got Tom Clancy 318 00:23:22,608 --> 00:23:23,874 three million dollars 319 00:23:23,876 --> 00:23:26,342 to write some more red-baiting propaganda. 320 00:23:26,344 --> 00:23:29,480 Lee, my morning has been long enough already. 321 00:23:29,482 --> 00:23:31,282 He's a fraud. 322 00:23:31,284 --> 00:23:32,249 What's your point? 323 00:23:32,251 --> 00:23:34,984 He was drinking sherry at your party. 324 00:23:34,986 --> 00:23:37,521 No self-respecting writer would drink sherry. 325 00:23:37,523 --> 00:23:39,089 Oh, Lord, Lee. 326 00:23:39,091 --> 00:23:40,624 I need you to get me a book advance 327 00:23:40,626 --> 00:23:42,560 on my Fanny Brice book. 328 00:23:42,562 --> 00:23:44,261 I need you to get ten thousand dollars. 329 00:23:44,263 --> 00:23:47,330 I'm months behind in my rent, and my cat is sick. 330 00:23:47,332 --> 00:23:49,500 And isn't this the exact reason that I have an agent? 331 00:23:49,502 --> 00:23:52,270 I can't get you an advance like that, Lee. I just can't. 332 00:23:52,272 --> 00:23:54,404 Give me one reason why that cocky shit 333 00:23:54,406 --> 00:23:55,571 gets three million dollars... 334 00:23:55,573 --> 00:23:57,607 and you can't get me ten thousand? 335 00:23:57,609 --> 00:23:59,009 Are you that bad of an agent? 336 00:23:59,011 --> 00:24:01,211 Toni, could you please close the door? 337 00:24:01,213 --> 00:24:05,116 Ms. Israel and I have some sensitive business to discuss. 338 00:24:05,118 --> 00:24:06,684 Yeah, God forbid you have to hear 339 00:24:06,686 --> 00:24:09,019 an adult conversation, Toni! 340 00:24:09,021 --> 00:24:10,687 I'll give you three reasons. 341 00:24:10,689 --> 00:24:13,956 Number one, Tom Clancy is famous. 342 00:24:13,958 --> 00:24:15,959 Here we go! 343 00:24:15,961 --> 00:24:18,628 Yes, you have written a couple of successful biographies 344 00:24:18,630 --> 00:24:19,796 and you've managed to disappear 345 00:24:19,798 --> 00:24:21,330 behind your subject matter, 346 00:24:21,332 --> 00:24:24,368 but because of that, nobody knows who you are! 347 00:24:24,370 --> 00:24:26,102 Because I'm doing my job. 348 00:24:26,104 --> 00:24:29,039 Number two, Tom Clancy does every radio show. 349 00:24:29,041 --> 00:24:32,242 He does Larry King. He goes to every book signing. 350 00:24:32,244 --> 00:24:33,510 He plays the game. 351 00:24:33,512 --> 00:24:35,545 Meanwhile, you have destroyed 352 00:24:35,547 --> 00:24:37,348 every bridge I have built for you. 353 00:24:37,350 --> 00:24:40,417 See, that is beside the point. I am doing good writing! 354 00:24:40,419 --> 00:24:43,954 Number three. Nobody wants a book about Fanny Brice. 355 00:24:43,956 --> 00:24:48,125 There is nothing new or sexy about Fanny Brice. 356 00:24:48,127 --> 00:24:50,060 I couldn't get you a $10 advance 357 00:24:50,062 --> 00:24:52,198 for a book about Fanny Brice. 358 00:24:54,332 --> 00:24:57,504 I had a book on the New York Times bestseller list. 359 00:24:58,438 --> 00:25:01,908 That has to count for something. 360 00:25:06,012 --> 00:25:09,080 Lee, I have known you a long time, 361 00:25:09,082 --> 00:25:12,249 and believe me, it hurts to say this to you. 362 00:25:12,251 --> 00:25:14,784 Tell me what to do then, Marjorie. 363 00:25:14,786 --> 00:25:16,821 I have to do something. 364 00:25:16,823 --> 00:25:17,888 I'll take anything. 365 00:25:17,890 --> 00:25:20,090 Magazine pieces, cracker box copy. 366 00:25:20,092 --> 00:25:24,296 Okay. Okay. You have two options. 367 00:25:25,598 --> 00:25:27,130 You either become a nicer person, 368 00:25:27,132 --> 00:25:30,467 you put on a clean shirt, you stop drinking, 369 00:25:30,469 --> 00:25:32,135 you say "please" and "thank you." 370 00:25:32,137 --> 00:25:34,705 Oh, God. Give me a fucking break, please. 371 00:25:34,707 --> 00:25:37,707 Well, clearly that's not going to happen. 372 00:25:37,709 --> 00:25:39,975 Or you can take the time to go out 373 00:25:39,977 --> 00:25:42,312 and make a name for yourself. 374 00:25:42,314 --> 00:25:44,715 And then maybe, maybe, 375 00:25:44,717 --> 00:25:47,618 I can get you paid for your work again. 376 00:25:47,620 --> 00:25:50,786 And how is it that I'm supposed to do that, Marjorie? 377 00:25:50,788 --> 00:25:52,755 I'm a 51-year-old woman 378 00:25:52,757 --> 00:25:55,159 who likes cats better than people. 379 00:25:55,893 --> 00:25:58,696 Not exactly hot and sexy, as you like to say. 380 00:25:58,698 --> 00:26:00,397 Write your book in your own voice. 381 00:26:00,399 --> 00:26:03,434 Well, you've been threatening to do it for 10 years. 382 00:26:03,436 --> 00:26:05,269 I'd love to, Marjorie. 383 00:26:05,271 --> 00:26:07,671 Except that I have bills to pay. 384 00:26:07,673 --> 00:26:09,372 And not everybody has an ex-husband 385 00:26:09,374 --> 00:26:12,311 who left them a Classic Six on the Park! 386 00:26:14,947 --> 00:26:18,014 You can be an asshole when you're famous, 387 00:26:18,016 --> 00:26:19,817 but as an unknown, 388 00:26:19,819 --> 00:26:23,122 you can't be such a bitch, Lee. 389 00:26:23,889 --> 00:26:25,990 Nobody is going to pay 390 00:26:25,992 --> 00:26:29,792 for the writer Lee Israel right now. 391 00:26:29,794 --> 00:26:32,263 My suggestion to you is you go out there 392 00:26:32,265 --> 00:26:35,901 and you find another way to make a living. 393 00:27:17,810 --> 00:27:18,945 Hmm. 394 00:27:33,691 --> 00:27:35,193 "P.S. 395 00:27:36,027 --> 00:27:40,531 "I have a new grandkid, and he got my old nose. 396 00:27:40,533 --> 00:27:42,032 "Do I have to leave him 397 00:27:42,034 --> 00:27:44,001 "an extra something for repairs?" 398 00:28:02,420 --> 00:28:05,155 Yeah, I can definitely get a lot more for this one. 399 00:28:05,157 --> 00:28:08,425 I mean, the P.S. makes it priceless. 400 00:28:10,563 --> 00:28:13,265 How does $350 sound? 401 00:28:15,834 --> 00:28:18,269 So, one of each, twice a day, in her food. 402 00:28:18,271 --> 00:28:20,771 The infection will probably go away in a day or two, 403 00:28:20,773 --> 00:28:22,438 but keep giving her the pills. 404 00:28:22,440 --> 00:28:24,076 It'll stabilize her. 405 00:28:29,413 --> 00:28:31,982 And here, your mom needed some milk. 406 00:28:31,984 --> 00:28:33,650 Thank you, Miss Israel. 407 00:28:33,652 --> 00:28:36,954 You're welcome. Your hair looks nice today. 408 00:28:36,956 --> 00:28:39,022 Oh, no, no, no. 409 00:28:39,024 --> 00:28:40,490 Are you still having insect problems? 410 00:28:40,492 --> 00:28:42,993 Yeah, it's awful. I mean, there's dead flies everywhere. 411 00:28:42,995 --> 00:28:46,032 - I'm going to take care of it. - Thanks. 412 00:29:49,026 --> 00:29:50,392 My dear Billy... 413 00:29:50,394 --> 00:29:52,428 I fear I must decline your invitation 414 00:29:52,430 --> 00:29:55,764 as this weekend heralds the arrival of Marlene. 415 00:29:55,766 --> 00:29:57,534 The canny old kraut remains 416 00:29:57,536 --> 00:29:59,037 one of my most cherished friends 417 00:29:59,405 --> 00:30:01,972 despite her predisposition to whining 418 00:30:01,974 --> 00:30:04,243 ad nauseam about her aging process 419 00:30:05,274 --> 00:30:06,176 as though she were the first gorgeous lady 420 00:30:06,178 --> 00:30:08,145 undone by Father Time. 421 00:30:08,147 --> 00:30:09,849 Ever yours, Noël. 422 00:31:58,923 --> 00:31:59,822 Welcome. 423 00:31:59,824 --> 00:32:01,660 Good afternoon. 424 00:32:02,160 --> 00:32:03,292 Um... 425 00:32:03,294 --> 00:32:04,994 I'm aware that you sell 426 00:32:04,996 --> 00:32:07,597 memorabilia and first editions. 427 00:32:07,599 --> 00:32:11,001 Is that also for typed, signed letters? 428 00:32:11,003 --> 00:32:12,401 Yes, all of that. 429 00:32:12,403 --> 00:32:14,207 What can I do for you? 430 00:32:18,409 --> 00:32:22,648 Wondering if these might be of interest to you? 431 00:32:37,830 --> 00:32:41,266 These are wonderful. Yes, I'd be very interested. 432 00:32:44,402 --> 00:32:46,703 My cousin was a collector. 433 00:32:46,705 --> 00:32:49,339 He's asked me to help sell some of his treasures 434 00:32:49,341 --> 00:32:51,608 so he can afford the early bird specials 435 00:32:51,610 --> 00:32:52,641 in Palm Beach. 436 00:32:52,643 --> 00:32:55,411 Hard to find letters that have a real... 437 00:32:55,413 --> 00:32:58,313 taste of the author's personality, 438 00:32:58,315 --> 00:33:00,282 but these do just that. 439 00:33:00,284 --> 00:33:02,918 Yes. I thought so, too. 440 00:33:02,920 --> 00:33:05,724 He's a very, very clever man. 441 00:33:06,457 --> 00:33:08,827 I can give you $200 for them. How does that sound? 442 00:33:10,795 --> 00:33:13,263 I'm afraid I can probably get double that elsewhere, so... 443 00:33:13,265 --> 00:33:14,531 Okay. 444 00:33:14,533 --> 00:33:16,867 You're probably right. 445 00:33:16,869 --> 00:33:18,404 Name your price. 446 00:33:21,107 --> 00:33:22,975 $400 seems fair. 447 00:33:24,709 --> 00:33:25,775 Okay. 448 00:33:31,115 --> 00:33:32,182 Um... 449 00:33:32,184 --> 00:33:33,751 Do you happen to have cash? 450 00:33:33,753 --> 00:33:36,719 My cousin has closed all of his banking accounts. 451 00:33:36,721 --> 00:33:38,021 It's complicated. 452 00:33:38,023 --> 00:33:40,293 I think I've got it. 453 00:33:44,662 --> 00:33:47,763 And please, if you come across anything else, bring it in. 454 00:33:47,765 --> 00:33:50,699 I've got high-end clients who come in frequently, 455 00:33:50,701 --> 00:33:55,138 or I'll call them if I have something I know they'll like. 456 00:33:55,140 --> 00:33:56,706 Sure thing. 457 00:33:56,708 --> 00:33:59,176 In fact, I have a buyer who actually knew Mr. Coward. 458 00:33:59,178 --> 00:34:01,176 He's gonna love these. 459 00:34:01,178 --> 00:34:02,946 Really? 460 00:34:02,948 --> 00:34:04,382 Wonderful. 461 00:34:08,686 --> 00:34:09,721 Okay, then. 462 00:34:14,026 --> 00:34:15,492 Crosby Street. 463 00:34:15,494 --> 00:34:17,926 I'm looking for the tall guy. The book buyer. 464 00:34:17,928 --> 00:34:18,861 This is he. 465 00:34:18,863 --> 00:34:20,363 Oh, hello, thank God! 466 00:34:20,365 --> 00:34:23,633 This is Lillian Schuster from the fourth floor. 467 00:34:23,635 --> 00:34:25,200 There's been an emergency. 468 00:34:25,202 --> 00:34:26,568 The building's on fire! 469 00:34:26,570 --> 00:34:28,604 Oh, God! 470 00:34:28,606 --> 00:34:31,073 Can you get in? Can you get into the building? 471 00:34:31,075 --> 00:34:32,475 - My dog is in there. - No! 472 00:34:32,477 --> 00:34:35,312 There's flames coming out of your window right now. 473 00:34:39,151 --> 00:34:40,283 That was very enjoyable. 474 00:34:40,285 --> 00:34:41,383 Go, go, go! 475 00:34:41,385 --> 00:34:42,785 You do a very good voice. 476 00:34:42,787 --> 00:34:43,986 Oh! 477 00:34:43,988 --> 00:34:46,023 You know what, I got no jingle in my jeans. 478 00:34:46,025 --> 00:34:47,090 You got a token? 479 00:34:49,360 --> 00:34:53,129 This is a celebratory drinking session, 480 00:34:53,131 --> 00:34:54,798 and not a wallowing one. 481 00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:57,233 It's hard to tell the difference with you. 482 00:34:57,235 --> 00:34:58,604 No offense. 483 00:34:59,805 --> 00:35:03,472 I have figured out a way to pay my bills 484 00:35:03,474 --> 00:35:05,408 without shoveling shit. 485 00:35:05,410 --> 00:35:07,510 And it is a good feeling. 486 00:35:07,512 --> 00:35:09,345 Well, chin-chin. 487 00:35:10,447 --> 00:35:12,481 You going to tell me how? 488 00:35:12,483 --> 00:35:14,917 No. You'd be too scandalized. 489 00:35:14,919 --> 00:35:16,285 Oh, my! 490 00:35:16,287 --> 00:35:18,521 You clearly don't know me very well. 491 00:35:18,523 --> 00:35:20,423 Some things 492 00:35:20,425 --> 00:35:22,291 are just better kept to oneself, 493 00:35:22,293 --> 00:35:25,093 even if they are brilliant. 494 00:35:25,095 --> 00:35:27,967 Come on! Spill the beans! 495 00:35:31,135 --> 00:35:32,505 Oh, God. 496 00:35:34,539 --> 00:35:35,805 Can you keep a secret? 497 00:35:35,807 --> 00:35:39,078 I have no one to tell. All my friends are dead. 498 00:35:40,579 --> 00:35:45,215 Quite by accident, I find myself in a rather... 499 00:35:45,217 --> 00:35:46,416 criminal position. 500 00:35:46,418 --> 00:35:50,519 I can't fathom what criminal activity 501 00:35:50,521 --> 00:35:51,787 you could possibly involve in, 502 00:35:51,789 --> 00:35:53,222 except a crime of fashion, of course. 503 00:35:53,224 --> 00:35:56,392 I'm embellishing... 504 00:35:56,394 --> 00:35:58,494 documents, if you will. 505 00:35:58,496 --> 00:36:00,664 Are you forging checks? 506 00:36:00,666 --> 00:36:01,664 No. 507 00:36:01,666 --> 00:36:03,999 Literary letters by prominent writers. 508 00:36:04,001 --> 00:36:07,602 Not checks, not money, just letters? 509 00:36:07,604 --> 00:36:11,274 You're not understanding the world of elite... 510 00:36:11,276 --> 00:36:14,376 collectible, literary artifacts. 511 00:36:14,378 --> 00:36:16,479 I suppose not. But how thrilling 512 00:36:16,481 --> 00:36:19,381 to be forging pieces of paper that go where? 513 00:36:19,383 --> 00:36:20,515 Libraries? 514 00:36:20,517 --> 00:36:22,551 No, I am selling to collectors. 515 00:36:22,553 --> 00:36:24,187 How much are you getting for them? 516 00:36:24,189 --> 00:36:26,088 I don't know why I told you. 517 00:36:26,090 --> 00:36:27,756 It's a waste of a secret. 518 00:36:27,758 --> 00:36:28,925 I should have gone out there 519 00:36:28,927 --> 00:36:30,494 and gotten a rock and told the rock, 520 00:36:30,496 --> 00:36:32,294 'cause I'd get a better response. 521 00:36:32,296 --> 00:36:34,499 Who else have you told about this? 522 00:36:36,535 --> 00:36:38,200 You're not the only one without friends. 523 00:36:39,537 --> 00:36:41,972 No. I remember you had someone. 524 00:36:41,974 --> 00:36:44,006 We broke up. She was a pain in my ass. 525 00:36:44,008 --> 00:36:45,075 Why? 526 00:36:45,077 --> 00:36:47,109 Because she wanted things. 527 00:36:47,111 --> 00:36:48,445 Like what? Money? 528 00:36:48,447 --> 00:36:49,678 No. 529 00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:51,948 She wanted me to listen to her troubles, 530 00:36:51,950 --> 00:36:54,283 and become closer with her friends 531 00:36:54,285 --> 00:36:56,787 and shit like that. 532 00:36:56,789 --> 00:36:58,491 The nerve. 533 00:37:00,392 --> 00:37:04,329 I haven't been in a relationship for years. 534 00:37:04,963 --> 00:37:08,030 It's very hard to meet someone at my age. 535 00:37:08,032 --> 00:37:09,365 I'm losing my hair. 536 00:37:09,367 --> 00:37:11,970 I don't think that's the reason. 537 00:37:15,506 --> 00:37:17,240 Wasn't this, uh... 538 00:37:17,242 --> 00:37:20,577 One line here was particularly clever, don't you think? 539 00:37:20,579 --> 00:37:23,546 It's wonderful. I love his writing. 540 00:37:23,548 --> 00:37:27,216 And Dorothy Parker as well. Caustic wit, you know? 541 00:37:27,218 --> 00:37:29,151 Caustic wit is my religion. 542 00:37:29,153 --> 00:37:32,220 I can't carry it off. You certainly can. 543 00:37:32,222 --> 00:37:34,524 Doesn't help too much in the relationship department. 544 00:37:34,526 --> 00:37:36,762 I'm sure that's not true. 545 00:37:39,130 --> 00:37:41,363 Okay, shall we settle up? 546 00:37:41,365 --> 00:37:42,700 Yeah. 547 00:37:47,606 --> 00:37:49,640 I know. Cash. 548 00:37:58,483 --> 00:37:59,649 This has my number. 549 00:37:59,651 --> 00:38:02,721 Well, the number of the store. 550 00:38:03,689 --> 00:38:05,722 If you're ever in the neighborhood, 551 00:38:05,724 --> 00:38:08,861 and, you know, want to get a drink or coffee sometime. 552 00:38:12,530 --> 00:38:13,798 Sounds good. 553 00:38:15,300 --> 00:38:16,802 I would like that. 554 00:38:34,820 --> 00:38:36,218 You look like shit. 555 00:38:36,220 --> 00:38:37,590 Oh, ditto. 556 00:38:43,628 --> 00:38:46,297 You are looking at one month's rent. 557 00:38:49,702 --> 00:38:50,970 Who's Marlene? 558 00:38:51,970 --> 00:38:53,669 It's Marlene. 559 00:38:53,671 --> 00:38:55,805 God, I don't know why I bother showing you anything. 560 00:38:55,807 --> 00:38:57,176 How much did you get? 561 00:38:58,242 --> 00:38:59,642 I got $400 for two. 562 00:38:59,644 --> 00:39:01,544 That's a little more than I just made. 563 00:39:01,546 --> 00:39:03,512 What? 564 00:39:03,514 --> 00:39:05,283 I just sold a little coke. 565 00:39:06,351 --> 00:39:08,017 Right here? To whom? 566 00:39:08,019 --> 00:39:11,220 Some fool. Mostly laxative. Just left. 567 00:39:11,222 --> 00:39:12,222 You know what? Do me a favor 568 00:39:12,224 --> 00:39:13,657 and keep me away from your seedy dealings. 569 00:39:13,659 --> 00:39:15,725 Hello, ladies. 570 00:39:15,727 --> 00:39:17,429 I resent that. 571 00:39:18,063 --> 00:39:20,430 Mmm. May I ask... 572 00:39:20,432 --> 00:39:22,566 ...how sweet your cinnamon roll is? 573 00:39:22,568 --> 00:39:24,867 It's perfect. 574 00:39:24,869 --> 00:39:26,535 If you don't like it, I'll eat it. 575 00:39:26,537 --> 00:39:27,872 Oh. 576 00:39:30,441 --> 00:39:31,341 Yeah, I'll have a coffee. 577 00:39:31,343 --> 00:39:33,142 Oh. 578 00:39:33,144 --> 00:39:35,714 - And can you warm it up? - 'Course I can. 579 00:39:39,050 --> 00:39:41,617 How are you gonna eat it with his dick in your mouth? 580 00:39:41,619 --> 00:39:43,220 - First things first. - Hmm. 581 00:39:43,222 --> 00:39:45,222 God, you're shameless. 582 00:39:45,224 --> 00:39:46,689 He started it. 583 00:39:46,691 --> 00:39:49,091 - Oh, help yourself. - Okay. 584 00:39:49,093 --> 00:39:52,829 So, now we've both got some money. 585 00:39:52,831 --> 00:39:54,133 What are we gonna do? 586 00:39:54,765 --> 00:39:56,164 What do you mean? 587 00:39:56,166 --> 00:39:58,702 Gamble? Shop? Drink? 588 00:39:58,704 --> 00:40:00,068 I don't suppose you dance? 589 00:40:00,070 --> 00:40:03,974 Unlike you, I prefer to put my money to good use. 590 00:40:03,976 --> 00:40:06,843 Like buying groceries or securing shelter. 591 00:40:06,845 --> 00:40:08,644 I just thought we should do something. 592 00:40:08,646 --> 00:40:10,983 I mean, life is dreary. 593 00:40:17,088 --> 00:40:20,157 ♪ And love me even half as much ♪ 594 00:40:20,159 --> 00:40:26,796 ♪ As I love you ♪ 595 00:40:26,798 --> 00:40:28,367 Let's go sit down. 596 00:40:47,485 --> 00:40:48,950 Thank you. 597 00:40:48,952 --> 00:40:51,421 This next song goes out 598 00:40:51,423 --> 00:40:53,256 to all the agoraphobic junkies 599 00:40:53,258 --> 00:40:55,791 who couldn't be here tonight. 600 00:40:55,793 --> 00:40:57,526 We don't have to stay long. 601 00:40:57,528 --> 00:40:59,562 One drink? 602 00:40:59,564 --> 00:41:01,263 Yeah, I like it. It's good. 603 00:41:02,700 --> 00:41:03,867 Scotch and soda? 604 00:41:03,869 --> 00:41:04,901 Well, I'm here. 605 00:41:04,903 --> 00:41:09,138 ♪ Ladies, good night ♪ 606 00:41:09,140 --> 00:41:15,780 ♪ It's time to say goodbye ♪ 607 00:41:16,581 --> 00:41:19,016 - Two scotch and sodas, please. - You got it. 608 00:41:20,952 --> 00:41:23,822 ♪ Good night, ladies ♪ 609 00:41:25,856 --> 00:41:30,859 ♪ Ladies, good night ♪ 610 00:41:30,861 --> 00:41:33,896 ♪ It's time to say ♪ 611 00:41:33,898 --> 00:41:37,367 ♪ Goodbye ♪ 612 00:41:37,369 --> 00:41:38,836 Sing it! 613 00:41:41,805 --> 00:41:45,374 ♪ All night long you've been drinking ♪ 614 00:41:45,376 --> 00:41:49,982 ♪ Your tequila ♪ 615 00:41:52,117 --> 00:41:57,653 ♪ But now you sucked your lemon peel dry ♪ 616 00:41:57,655 --> 00:42:03,492 ♪ So why not get high? ♪ 617 00:42:03,494 --> 00:42:05,729 ♪ Good night, ladies ♪ 618 00:42:05,731 --> 00:42:07,763 ♪ Ladies, good night ♪ 619 00:42:14,840 --> 00:42:17,506 ♪ It's a lonely ♪ 620 00:42:17,508 --> 00:42:20,675 ♪ Saturday ♪ 621 00:42:20,677 --> 00:42:24,849 ♪ Night ♪ 622 00:42:28,985 --> 00:42:31,153 No, it's not worth half that. 623 00:42:31,155 --> 00:42:33,055 Really, a very fair price. 624 00:42:33,057 --> 00:42:34,858 Here is the signature. 625 00:42:34,860 --> 00:42:37,327 This is a $60 book. 626 00:42:37,329 --> 00:42:39,997 Really worth probably about $150. 627 00:42:40,698 --> 00:42:42,064 Oh, baby, I hope 628 00:42:42,066 --> 00:42:43,700 they've got some booze. 629 00:42:43,702 --> 00:42:46,769 They most certainly do not have booze. 630 00:42:46,771 --> 00:42:49,240 Maybe you can find some coke. 631 00:42:50,006 --> 00:42:51,640 How much is that? 632 00:42:51,642 --> 00:42:53,044 $200. 633 00:42:54,244 --> 00:42:57,048 How do you know he really signed it? 634 00:42:57,883 --> 00:42:59,149 It's authenticated. 635 00:42:59,151 --> 00:43:02,050 - By whom? - By an authenticator. 636 00:43:02,052 --> 00:43:04,288 Silly twat. 637 00:43:05,724 --> 00:43:07,590 Oh, look, cards. 638 00:43:10,427 --> 00:43:12,428 - Hello. - Hi. 639 00:43:12,430 --> 00:43:13,564 Hey, Carl. 640 00:43:14,298 --> 00:43:15,367 Hi. 641 00:43:16,034 --> 00:43:18,867 - Such a hoot, isn't he? - Brilliant. 642 00:43:18,869 --> 00:43:20,602 Such a hoot. 643 00:43:20,604 --> 00:43:21,937 Oh! 644 00:43:21,939 --> 00:43:24,774 Take a look at this beauty. 645 00:43:24,776 --> 00:43:27,111 I just got this one in. 646 00:43:28,012 --> 00:43:30,181 Dorothy Parker. 647 00:43:31,349 --> 00:43:32,914 Wow. 648 00:43:32,916 --> 00:43:34,684 I was born 30 years too late. 649 00:43:34,686 --> 00:43:36,919 I feel the same way. 650 00:43:36,921 --> 00:43:38,687 How much is that? 651 00:43:38,689 --> 00:43:40,923 Oh, that... 652 00:43:40,925 --> 00:43:43,559 We're not buying. We're just looking today. 653 00:43:43,561 --> 00:43:46,195 No problem. I am asking $600. 654 00:43:46,197 --> 00:43:48,097 Wow! 655 00:43:51,135 --> 00:43:53,035 But if you are tempted, 656 00:43:53,037 --> 00:43:54,537 make sure you do your homework. 657 00:43:54,539 --> 00:43:58,841 Not all of the other dealers are as discerning as we are. 658 00:43:58,843 --> 00:44:00,343 Oh? 659 00:44:00,345 --> 00:44:03,682 Some care more than others about getting the real thing. 660 00:44:05,550 --> 00:44:09,454 Just in case, who should we look out for? 661 00:44:10,755 --> 00:44:12,023 That one. 662 00:44:12,456 --> 00:44:13,525 The bowtie? 663 00:44:14,959 --> 00:44:17,095 I'd stay away from him. 664 00:44:17,963 --> 00:44:19,327 You run your mouth too much. 665 00:44:19,329 --> 00:44:20,896 - What'd I say? - Too much. 666 00:44:20,898 --> 00:44:23,032 Oh, good. He's almost finished. 667 00:44:23,034 --> 00:44:24,401 Let's go to your place. 668 00:44:24,403 --> 00:44:25,334 - Come on. - Finally. 669 00:44:25,336 --> 00:44:27,472 Those flies are driving me crazy. 670 00:44:39,883 --> 00:44:42,318 Oh! It smells horrible. 671 00:44:42,320 --> 00:44:45,189 I'll come back when it's cleaned up. 672 00:44:46,189 --> 00:44:48,425 What's going on in there? 673 00:44:48,427 --> 00:44:50,526 What? Nothing. 674 00:44:50,528 --> 00:44:51,727 It smells really bad. 675 00:44:51,729 --> 00:44:53,863 Yeah, do you think I'm deaf? 676 00:44:53,865 --> 00:44:55,600 I heard them. 677 00:44:57,135 --> 00:45:00,403 Jesus, I'll do some straightening. 678 00:45:08,278 --> 00:45:10,113 I don't mind, Lee. Come on. 679 00:45:10,115 --> 00:45:12,448 Let me in. I'll come and help you. 680 00:45:37,508 --> 00:45:39,177 Oh, my God! 681 00:45:47,619 --> 00:45:49,121 Oh, God. 682 00:45:53,258 --> 00:45:55,160 That's the last of it. 683 00:45:56,693 --> 00:45:57,894 Ugh. 684 00:45:57,896 --> 00:45:59,598 I need a break. 685 00:46:09,840 --> 00:46:10,974 Hello? 686 00:46:10,976 --> 00:46:13,142 Hello? Elaine? 687 00:46:13,144 --> 00:46:14,943 Who is this? 688 00:46:14,945 --> 00:46:16,077 Who is this? 689 00:46:16,079 --> 00:46:18,613 You called me. 690 00:46:18,615 --> 00:46:20,182 What is your name? 691 00:46:20,184 --> 00:46:21,550 What's your name? 692 00:46:21,552 --> 00:46:23,385 Harrison fucking Ford. 693 00:46:23,387 --> 00:46:25,088 Who the hell are you? 694 00:46:35,867 --> 00:46:37,600 Roush Agency. 695 00:46:37,602 --> 00:46:39,568 Yes, is Marjorie there? 696 00:46:39,570 --> 00:46:41,236 Lee Israel calling. 697 00:46:41,238 --> 00:46:43,740 I'm sorry. She's unavailable right now. 698 00:46:43,742 --> 00:46:45,240 Oh, I see. 699 00:46:45,242 --> 00:46:48,111 Will you please leave word for her that I called? 700 00:46:48,113 --> 00:46:49,410 Thank you. 701 00:46:55,986 --> 00:46:57,887 Roush Agency. 702 00:46:57,889 --> 00:47:00,289 Yes, I have Nora Ephron calling. 703 00:47:00,291 --> 00:47:02,691 Certainly, one moment. 704 00:47:02,693 --> 00:47:03,959 Nora, hello. 705 00:47:03,961 --> 00:47:05,361 Is this a good time? 706 00:47:05,363 --> 00:47:07,830 Of course it is. So wonderful to hear from you. 707 00:47:07,832 --> 00:47:09,231 You star fucker! 708 00:47:09,233 --> 00:47:10,867 Is that one word or two? 709 00:47:20,044 --> 00:47:21,813 Who's Elaine? 710 00:47:24,749 --> 00:47:26,718 None of your business. 711 00:47:31,356 --> 00:47:33,588 Came out well. Don't you think? 712 00:47:33,590 --> 00:47:34,892 Lovely. 713 00:47:36,427 --> 00:47:39,463 Okay, Miss Parker, that will be $35.50. 714 00:47:44,901 --> 00:47:46,135 Dear Joshua, 715 00:47:46,137 --> 00:47:47,602 Alan told me to write and apologize. 716 00:47:47,604 --> 00:47:51,340 I have a hangover that is a real museum piece. 717 00:47:51,342 --> 00:47:53,742 I'm sure I must have said something terrible. 718 00:47:53,744 --> 00:47:56,445 To save me this kind of exertion in the future, 719 00:47:56,447 --> 00:47:57,847 I am thinking of having 720 00:47:57,849 --> 00:47:59,448 little letters run off, saying 721 00:47:59,450 --> 00:48:02,184 "Can you ever forgive me? Dorothy." 722 00:48:02,186 --> 00:48:03,486 But until I do that, 723 00:48:03,488 --> 00:48:06,925 can you ever forgive me? Dorothy. 724 00:48:13,030 --> 00:48:14,095 Dearest Ralph. Dear friend. 725 00:48:14,097 --> 00:48:15,330 Dear Timothy. Dear Germaine... 726 00:48:15,332 --> 00:48:17,466 Gertrude Stein was right about the roses, 727 00:48:17,468 --> 00:48:19,734 but she was all wet about California. 728 00:48:19,736 --> 00:48:22,271 She said there was no "there", there. 729 00:48:22,273 --> 00:48:24,106 Well, I'm here to tell you there is. 730 00:48:24,108 --> 00:48:26,209 Yours, Dorothy Parker. 731 00:48:26,211 --> 00:48:28,343 Dear Edith, that terrible old fart... 732 00:48:28,345 --> 00:48:30,245 the tyranny addict, Joe Kennedy, 733 00:48:30,247 --> 00:48:31,479 ruined Gloria Swanson 734 00:48:31,481 --> 00:48:33,048 by luring her away from Paramount... 735 00:48:33,050 --> 00:48:36,452 Dear Sidney, I had no idea you knew Dottie Parker. 736 00:48:36,454 --> 00:48:39,988 A tragic loss, but she had been dying for decades. 737 00:48:39,990 --> 00:48:42,158 Whether it was drink or chemistry 738 00:48:42,160 --> 00:48:43,459 or character, she was unable... 739 00:48:43,461 --> 00:48:44,526 I hate the Kennedys... 740 00:48:44,528 --> 00:48:46,796 What are you now? Waitress? 741 00:48:46,798 --> 00:48:48,564 No, I robbed a bank. 742 00:48:48,566 --> 00:48:49,499 Miss Israel. 743 00:48:49,501 --> 00:48:50,966 How you doing, Mrs. Ungur? 744 00:48:50,968 --> 00:48:52,233 Thank you for those cookies. 745 00:48:52,235 --> 00:48:53,836 Those were good cookies, weren't they? 746 00:48:53,838 --> 00:48:57,006 Not as good as the chocolate babka, but good. 747 00:48:57,008 --> 00:48:58,807 I'll have to remember that. 748 00:48:58,809 --> 00:49:01,242 Hey, tell your son to go easy on me, huh? 749 00:49:01,244 --> 00:49:03,914 Can't kick a old dog out on the street, right? 750 00:49:05,349 --> 00:49:06,816 Affectionately, Lillian Hellman. 751 00:49:06,818 --> 00:49:08,017 Yours, Edna Ferber. 752 00:49:08,019 --> 00:49:10,119 - Dorothy Parker. - Judy Holliday. 753 00:49:10,121 --> 00:49:11,653 - Louise Brooks. - Marlene Dietrich. 754 00:49:11,655 --> 00:49:13,254 Sincerely yours, Noël Coward. 755 00:49:24,300 --> 00:49:25,501 You're Lee? 756 00:49:25,503 --> 00:49:28,439 - Ms. Israel. - Alan. 757 00:49:30,474 --> 00:49:32,073 So, what do you got? 758 00:49:32,075 --> 00:49:33,544 Uh... 759 00:49:37,014 --> 00:49:38,382 Mmm. 760 00:49:40,584 --> 00:49:42,117 Mmm-hmm. 761 00:49:42,119 --> 00:49:44,486 Very witty, don't you think? 762 00:49:44,488 --> 00:49:47,492 She had quite the mouth. 763 00:49:48,226 --> 00:49:51,494 I think what she had was a very big personality. 764 00:49:51,496 --> 00:49:55,330 Uh-huh. Liked the ladies, too, I heard. 765 00:49:55,332 --> 00:49:57,302 You sure these are the real thing? 766 00:49:59,836 --> 00:50:01,204 I assume so. 767 00:50:01,206 --> 00:50:05,106 Nah, most people will believe anything you tell them anyway. 768 00:50:05,108 --> 00:50:07,309 And people love this stuff. 769 00:50:07,311 --> 00:50:09,477 Personally, I don't get it. 770 00:50:09,479 --> 00:50:14,048 To Fanny Brice, Noël Coward, and Dorothy Parker. 771 00:50:14,050 --> 00:50:16,785 May their brilliance live on. 772 00:50:16,787 --> 00:50:21,189 And to Lee, a brilliant writer who happens to still be alive. 773 00:50:21,191 --> 00:50:23,394 That's negotiable. 774 00:50:24,394 --> 00:50:27,296 Wouldn't it be incredible if, after you passed on... 775 00:50:27,298 --> 00:50:29,298 people were selling your letters? 776 00:50:29,300 --> 00:50:30,865 Why on earth would I want that? 777 00:50:30,867 --> 00:50:33,602 Well, because. Most of us mortals just disappear. 778 00:50:33,604 --> 00:50:36,070 This way, you still kind of exist. 779 00:50:36,072 --> 00:50:38,541 No. When I die, who cares? 780 00:50:38,543 --> 00:50:41,109 I just want somebody to feed my cat. 781 00:50:41,111 --> 00:50:42,747 I'll feed your cat. 782 00:50:43,947 --> 00:50:45,914 Thank you. 783 00:50:45,916 --> 00:50:47,582 Have you ever written about yourself? 784 00:50:47,584 --> 00:50:50,486 Nah. I don't think I'd find myself very interesting. 785 00:50:50,488 --> 00:50:52,354 I would. You should. 786 00:50:52,356 --> 00:50:54,021 Instead of waiting for someone 787 00:50:54,023 --> 00:50:56,527 to write a biography about you. 788 00:50:57,427 --> 00:51:00,331 You're very flattering, Anna. 789 00:51:02,967 --> 00:51:06,403 I can't believe that I'm doing this, but... 790 00:51:07,505 --> 00:51:09,637 Here's one of my stories. 791 00:51:09,639 --> 00:51:11,372 You brought it with you. 792 00:51:11,374 --> 00:51:13,443 I'm an idiot, I know. 793 00:51:13,445 --> 00:51:15,510 No, I mean, I'll give it a read. 794 00:51:15,512 --> 00:51:17,646 I've only taken a couple of classes... 795 00:51:17,648 --> 00:51:20,885 Oh, don't worry about it. I'm... I'm honored. 796 00:51:31,229 --> 00:51:33,095 You wear glasses. 797 00:51:33,097 --> 00:51:35,263 Only recently. 798 00:51:35,265 --> 00:51:37,401 I like them. They look good. 799 00:51:38,135 --> 00:51:40,336 I wasn't sure about the frames. 800 00:51:40,338 --> 00:51:42,403 They're nice. 801 00:51:42,405 --> 00:51:44,707 I used to have perfect vision. 802 00:51:44,709 --> 00:51:46,508 Don't you hate getting older 803 00:51:46,510 --> 00:51:49,044 and watching your parts fall apart? 804 00:51:49,046 --> 00:51:50,678 Nah. You're too young. 805 00:51:50,680 --> 00:51:52,080 Hardly. 806 00:51:52,082 --> 00:51:54,115 I really thought that I'd have accomplished 807 00:51:54,117 --> 00:51:55,651 more by this time in my life. 808 00:51:55,653 --> 00:51:57,852 You just need to drink more alcohol. 809 00:51:57,854 --> 00:52:01,760 I mean, plus, you own the shop, right? 810 00:52:02,559 --> 00:52:05,561 Well, I inherited it, yeah. 811 00:52:05,563 --> 00:52:09,133 Truth be told, it's more pressure than I thought. 812 00:52:10,434 --> 00:52:13,269 My father took real pride in it. 813 00:52:13,271 --> 00:52:14,906 Almost too much. 814 00:52:15,305 --> 00:52:18,443 I try to live up to that. 815 00:52:20,378 --> 00:52:22,343 Where did you grow up? 816 00:52:22,345 --> 00:52:24,113 Woodside, Queens. 817 00:52:24,115 --> 00:52:27,749 My parents live in Florida, may they rest in peace. 818 00:52:27,751 --> 00:52:29,218 I also have a ridiculous brother 819 00:52:29,220 --> 00:52:31,789 who lives on Long Island, so... 820 00:52:32,122 --> 00:52:33,356 What about you? 821 00:52:33,358 --> 00:52:34,856 I'm an only child... 822 00:52:34,858 --> 00:52:37,425 but I'm close with a few of my cousins, though. 823 00:52:37,427 --> 00:52:40,129 I think I have some cousins. I think. 824 00:52:41,398 --> 00:52:43,030 Not into the family thing? 825 00:52:43,032 --> 00:52:44,868 No, I like my alone time. 826 00:52:45,570 --> 00:52:48,570 Well, not every second, though. 827 00:52:48,572 --> 00:52:50,207 You're here with me right now. 828 00:52:51,941 --> 00:52:55,746 Oh, hey. I always need a drinking buddy. 829 00:53:16,599 --> 00:53:18,633 Thank you. That was fun. 830 00:53:18,635 --> 00:53:20,501 I think I'm a little tipsy. Are you? 831 00:53:20,503 --> 00:53:21,870 It takes a lot more than that. 832 00:53:21,872 --> 00:53:24,573 Oh, no. Have I embarrassed myself? 833 00:53:24,575 --> 00:53:26,108 What did Dorothy say? 834 00:53:26,110 --> 00:53:28,646 "Can you ever forgive me?" 835 00:53:33,383 --> 00:53:36,119 What? Did I say something wrong? 836 00:53:36,854 --> 00:53:37,818 No. 837 00:53:37,820 --> 00:53:40,155 You didn't say anything wrong. 838 00:53:40,157 --> 00:53:41,659 Good. 839 00:53:43,394 --> 00:53:44,928 This has been very nice. 840 00:53:46,028 --> 00:53:47,764 It was. 841 00:53:48,499 --> 00:53:50,267 It's always nice to make a new friend. 842 00:53:52,001 --> 00:53:53,904 Indeed. 843 00:53:54,972 --> 00:53:56,671 Speak soon? 844 00:53:56,673 --> 00:53:58,673 When I read your story, I'll let you know. 845 00:53:58,675 --> 00:54:00,809 I'm pretty busy these days, 846 00:54:00,811 --> 00:54:04,948 so I don't know if I'll get to it right away, but... 847 00:54:06,349 --> 00:54:07,684 That's okay. 848 00:54:08,418 --> 00:54:09,483 Good night. 849 00:54:09,485 --> 00:54:11,188 Good night. 850 00:55:19,590 --> 00:55:21,390 My dear boy, 851 00:55:21,392 --> 00:55:23,291 I enjoyed our talk tremendously 852 00:55:23,293 --> 00:55:26,760 and was not the least bit upset about the article. 853 00:55:26,762 --> 00:55:28,162 My professional demise 854 00:55:28,164 --> 00:55:30,566 has been gleefully predicted for years, 855 00:55:30,568 --> 00:55:33,234 but nonetheless, I await the return 856 00:55:33,236 --> 00:55:35,836 of your ruby-red lips to Blue Harbor 857 00:55:35,838 --> 00:55:38,506 in the event my spirit should falter. 858 00:55:38,508 --> 00:55:42,144 Yours and very much anticipating, 859 00:55:42,146 --> 00:55:44,215 Noël. 860 00:55:46,316 --> 00:55:47,649 This is quite something. 861 00:55:48,785 --> 00:55:50,184 I thought so, too. 862 00:55:50,186 --> 00:55:51,921 Well, as you know, 863 00:55:51,923 --> 00:55:53,888 I think I already have a buyer for it. 864 00:55:53,890 --> 00:55:55,590 I'm gonna call him as soon as you leave. 865 00:55:55,592 --> 00:55:57,028 Huh. 866 00:55:58,095 --> 00:56:01,296 I sent the Marlene Dietrich to Los Angeles. 867 00:56:01,298 --> 00:56:04,936 I got a request from a collector out there. 868 00:56:05,602 --> 00:56:06,901 Wonderful. 869 00:56:06,903 --> 00:56:10,338 You guys do that? You sell to other collectors? 870 00:56:10,340 --> 00:56:11,740 Oh, yeah. 871 00:56:11,742 --> 00:56:14,943 There's a whole world of wheeling and dealing... 872 00:56:14,945 --> 00:56:17,079 most of which I don't partake in. 873 00:56:17,081 --> 00:56:20,816 There are a lot of characters in this line of work. 874 00:56:20,818 --> 00:56:24,954 Hey, for a while there, we had The Hitler Diaries. 875 00:56:24,956 --> 00:56:25,754 Hmm. 876 00:56:25,756 --> 00:56:28,423 Remember that? 877 00:56:28,425 --> 00:56:30,027 Criminal. 878 00:56:31,162 --> 00:56:33,128 Yeah. Not everyone gets into this 879 00:56:33,130 --> 00:56:37,298 because they respect talent and history... 880 00:56:37,300 --> 00:56:39,836 if you know what I mean. 881 00:56:40,537 --> 00:56:42,173 Yep. 882 00:57:07,564 --> 00:57:09,099 Lee? 883 00:57:14,738 --> 00:57:17,039 You really should replace the shower curtain, Lee. 884 00:57:17,041 --> 00:57:20,242 You wanna discuss decorating with me? 885 00:57:20,244 --> 00:57:22,577 Who beat you up? 886 00:57:22,579 --> 00:57:24,379 It's my own fault. 887 00:57:24,381 --> 00:57:25,648 I didn't have enough money, 888 00:57:25,650 --> 00:57:28,483 and I didn't know until after, and... 889 00:57:28,485 --> 00:57:31,155 Until it was too late. 890 00:57:32,289 --> 00:57:34,592 I'm not even going to try to understand that. 891 00:57:35,226 --> 00:57:37,825 I used to get away with so much. 892 00:57:37,827 --> 00:57:40,163 Do you think it'll scar? 893 00:57:41,631 --> 00:57:42,898 I couldn't find my keys, 894 00:57:42,900 --> 00:57:45,802 I couldn't get into my apartment. 895 00:57:47,070 --> 00:57:47,968 What? 896 00:57:47,970 --> 00:57:50,041 And where is said apartment? 897 00:57:52,642 --> 00:57:55,077 It was on Ninety-Second... 898 00:57:55,079 --> 00:57:58,180 then it was on Ninety-Sixth. 899 00:57:58,182 --> 00:57:59,884 You... 900 00:58:00,718 --> 00:58:03,321 You can sleep on my couch. 901 00:58:04,220 --> 00:58:06,356 Thank you. 902 00:58:12,463 --> 00:58:14,396 Are you ready to order? 903 00:58:14,398 --> 00:58:17,832 Uh, yeah, I'll have a burger, rare, with onions. 904 00:58:17,834 --> 00:58:20,200 I'll have the same, thanks. 905 00:58:20,202 --> 00:58:23,338 You said you wanted a steak. Get a steak. 906 00:58:23,340 --> 00:58:25,042 You sure? 907 00:58:25,476 --> 00:58:26,742 He's gonna have the steak. 908 00:58:26,744 --> 00:58:27,975 Why don't you have a steak? 909 00:58:27,977 --> 00:58:29,644 'Cause we came here to get you a steak. 910 00:58:29,646 --> 00:58:30,745 Thank you. 911 00:58:30,747 --> 00:58:32,215 Skirt or T-bone? 912 00:58:35,718 --> 00:58:38,887 He's gonna have the T-bone, medium-rare, 913 00:58:38,889 --> 00:58:40,525 and we'll have another round. 914 00:58:42,793 --> 00:58:44,825 How've you gotten by as long as you have? 915 00:58:44,827 --> 00:58:48,762 Do not underestimate sparkly blue eyes... 916 00:58:48,764 --> 00:58:50,633 and a little bit of street smarts. 917 00:58:50,635 --> 00:58:52,968 They go a long way in this city. 918 00:58:52,970 --> 00:58:56,704 Although I may have stretched my limits recently. 919 00:58:56,706 --> 00:58:59,041 Yeah, but who did you wanna be? 920 00:58:59,043 --> 00:59:01,309 I mean, what was the actual plan? 921 00:59:01,311 --> 00:59:03,512 I honestly don't know what to say. 922 00:59:03,514 --> 00:59:06,914 I imagined I'd figure it out as I went along, 923 00:59:06,916 --> 00:59:08,550 and for the most part, I have. 924 00:59:08,552 --> 00:59:09,984 I certainly have no regrets. 925 00:59:09,986 --> 00:59:12,588 That can't be true. 926 00:59:12,590 --> 00:59:13,821 Oh. 927 00:59:13,823 --> 00:59:16,791 You mean, why don't I have 928 00:59:16,793 --> 00:59:19,095 some brilliant talent for copying like you do? 929 00:59:19,963 --> 00:59:21,162 Is that what you think I'm doing? 930 00:59:21,164 --> 00:59:22,731 - You think I'm copying? - Mm-hmm. 931 00:59:22,733 --> 00:59:24,332 I'll have you know, I'm a better 932 00:59:24,334 --> 00:59:26,334 Dorothy Parker than Dorothy Parker. 933 00:59:26,336 --> 00:59:28,905 Oh, I'll drink to that. Cheers. 934 00:59:40,217 --> 00:59:43,350 - Get your feet off the couch. - Really? 935 00:59:43,352 --> 00:59:44,084 Look at it. 936 00:59:44,086 --> 00:59:46,153 This is not a flop house. 937 00:59:49,961 --> 00:59:51,126 There you go. 938 00:59:51,128 --> 00:59:52,894 How old is that old hairball anyway? 939 00:59:52,896 --> 00:59:54,995 She's 12. 940 00:59:54,997 --> 00:59:58,533 That is fucking old. What's that in cat years? 941 01:00:01,338 --> 01:00:03,805 This is Paul from Armada Books. 942 01:00:03,807 --> 01:00:07,441 Ms. Israel, I was wondering if you could come in tomorrow? 943 01:00:07,443 --> 01:00:09,410 I have a couple of questions regarding 944 01:00:09,412 --> 01:00:12,247 the last Coward letter I purchased. 945 01:00:12,249 --> 01:00:15,450 Please come in or call as soon as you can. 946 01:00:15,452 --> 01:00:16,550 Uh-oh. 947 01:00:16,552 --> 01:00:18,519 It's important. 948 01:00:52,189 --> 01:00:55,526 Thank you. Thank you for bringing it in. 949 01:00:57,227 --> 01:00:58,825 Hi, Lee. 950 01:00:58,827 --> 01:01:01,164 What seems to be the problem? 951 01:01:02,532 --> 01:01:06,536 You know I've got that client who knew Noël Coward. 952 01:01:07,438 --> 01:01:08,736 And he said that... 953 01:01:08,738 --> 01:01:13,075 Mr. Coward would never have been as explicit as he was 954 01:01:13,077 --> 01:01:17,144 regarding his orientation. 955 01:01:17,146 --> 01:01:19,315 It was illegal in those days, and... 956 01:01:20,015 --> 01:01:23,550 Anyway, apparently, the letter is a fake. 957 01:01:23,552 --> 01:01:25,320 I'm shocked. 958 01:01:25,322 --> 01:01:28,189 I mean, my uncle would be appalled. 959 01:01:28,191 --> 01:01:30,325 You mean, your cousin? 960 01:01:30,327 --> 01:01:31,626 Yes. 961 01:01:31,628 --> 01:01:37,133 My cousin has always been very avuncular toward me. So. 962 01:01:43,206 --> 01:01:48,443 I also got a call from Los Angeles, Lee. 963 01:01:48,445 --> 01:01:52,981 It seems one of your letters was quite the controversy 964 01:01:52,983 --> 01:01:55,619 at a convention out there. 965 01:01:56,352 --> 01:01:59,756 I hate to say it, but your name's been put on a list. 966 01:02:01,325 --> 01:02:02,490 On a list? 967 01:02:02,492 --> 01:02:04,728 People are on alert. 968 01:02:05,662 --> 01:02:07,164 That's all. 969 01:02:07,865 --> 01:02:10,368 They won't buy from you anymore. 970 01:02:27,584 --> 01:02:29,286 Hello? 971 01:02:31,320 --> 01:02:32,756 Alan? 972 01:02:34,023 --> 01:02:36,157 You got my messages. 973 01:02:36,159 --> 01:02:38,258 - Thanks for coming. - Yeah. 974 01:02:38,260 --> 01:02:41,729 I brought some wonderful Faulkners that I unearthed. 975 01:02:41,731 --> 01:02:43,131 Not why I called. 976 01:02:43,133 --> 01:02:45,636 Listen, the FBI has been in here to see me. 977 01:02:46,702 --> 01:02:48,202 The FBI? 978 01:02:48,204 --> 01:02:50,307 They asked me to wear a wire. 979 01:02:52,209 --> 01:02:55,443 I'm not gonna do that to you. I'm a good guy. 980 01:02:55,445 --> 01:02:57,477 And if they want me to be a witness... 981 01:02:57,479 --> 01:02:59,146 I'll lie. 982 01:02:59,148 --> 01:03:02,619 But you're gonna pay me $5,000. 983 01:03:05,222 --> 01:03:08,023 I don't know what you're talking about. 984 01:03:09,459 --> 01:03:12,227 Well, come on, I'm not gonna rat you out or anything. 985 01:03:12,229 --> 01:03:15,265 That's very generous of you. 986 01:03:16,599 --> 01:03:19,335 I don't have $5,000. 987 01:03:19,970 --> 01:03:22,771 You're a clever woman. 988 01:03:22,773 --> 01:03:24,842 Figure it out. 989 01:03:31,715 --> 01:03:33,080 Oh, hello, welcome. 990 01:03:33,082 --> 01:03:35,883 Oh, thank you very much. Um... 991 01:03:35,885 --> 01:03:37,385 My grandmother just died, and... 992 01:03:37,387 --> 01:03:38,720 - Oh. - No, it's all right. 993 01:03:38,722 --> 01:03:39,921 And I discovered these 994 01:03:39,923 --> 01:03:41,423 when I was going through her closet 995 01:03:41,425 --> 01:03:45,394 and wondered if they might be of interest to you or not. 996 01:03:45,396 --> 01:03:47,861 - "Edna Ferber." - You've heard of her? 997 01:03:47,863 --> 01:03:49,263 Oh, yes. 998 01:03:49,265 --> 01:03:52,100 She wrote that movie with James Dean. 999 01:03:52,102 --> 01:03:54,535 I guess I'm not really up on all these things. 1000 01:03:54,537 --> 01:03:58,407 Just look at that. Such wonderful knick-knacks. 1001 01:03:58,409 --> 01:04:01,642 So your granny collected letters? 1002 01:04:01,644 --> 01:04:03,077 I don't know any of the people in them, 1003 01:04:03,079 --> 01:04:05,914 but I feel they must be worth something. 1004 01:04:05,916 --> 01:04:07,448 And how did you know 1005 01:04:07,450 --> 01:04:09,117 that I bought this kind of thing? 1006 01:04:09,119 --> 01:04:11,318 - Do you? - Sure. 1007 01:04:11,320 --> 01:04:16,024 Yeah. I could give you $50 a piece. 1008 01:04:16,026 --> 01:04:17,559 I feel I could do better than that. 1009 01:04:17,561 --> 01:04:19,894 No offense, but a store in Brooklyn 1010 01:04:19,896 --> 01:04:23,064 offered me $200 for one. 1011 01:04:23,066 --> 01:04:24,599 For one? 1012 01:04:24,601 --> 01:04:26,903 Why didn't you sell it to them, then? 1013 01:04:28,305 --> 01:04:30,372 I hate the boroughs. 1014 01:04:30,374 --> 01:04:32,006 I'm really good at this. 1015 01:04:32,008 --> 01:04:33,475 You should see me at it. 1016 01:04:33,477 --> 01:04:35,242 When last did you go outside, Lee? 1017 01:04:35,244 --> 01:04:36,410 How much did you get? 1018 01:04:36,412 --> 01:04:39,046 First place gave me $600. 1019 01:04:39,048 --> 01:04:41,615 The other guy gave me $1,000. 1020 01:04:41,617 --> 01:04:43,417 You just got closer to paying back 1021 01:04:43,419 --> 01:04:46,320 that asshole with his own money. 1022 01:04:46,322 --> 01:04:48,423 He gave me $1,000! 1023 01:04:48,425 --> 01:04:50,624 - Was he suspicious? - Oh, hell, no. 1024 01:04:50,626 --> 01:04:52,529 I always did want to be an actor. Here. 1025 01:05:03,307 --> 01:05:05,407 How much did you say he gave you? 1026 01:05:05,409 --> 01:05:06,477 What? 1027 01:05:08,345 --> 01:05:10,178 You're stealing from me? 1028 01:05:10,180 --> 01:05:12,347 No. Uh... 1029 01:05:12,349 --> 01:05:14,048 What did I say? 1030 01:05:14,050 --> 01:05:17,551 He gave me $1,400 plus 600. I mean... 1031 01:05:17,553 --> 01:05:19,153 - Isn't that what I said? - No, moron. 1032 01:05:19,155 --> 01:05:20,287 It's not what you said. 1033 01:05:20,289 --> 01:05:21,689 You're stealing from me... 1034 01:05:21,691 --> 01:05:23,992 and you don't even know what it is you're selling. 1035 01:05:23,994 --> 01:05:25,292 Okay. 1036 01:05:25,294 --> 01:05:26,961 I made a mistake. 1037 01:05:26,963 --> 01:05:29,863 Okay? Here. Here. 1038 01:05:29,865 --> 01:05:31,568 Here. 1039 01:05:33,470 --> 01:05:35,637 Okay, they're literary treasures. 1040 01:05:35,639 --> 01:05:38,907 One of a kind, carefully written witticisms, okay? 1041 01:05:38,909 --> 01:05:41,443 They're not just a piece of paper. 1042 01:05:41,445 --> 01:05:45,146 It's a portal into a better time 1043 01:05:45,148 --> 01:05:47,080 and a better place where people 1044 01:05:47,082 --> 01:05:49,718 still actually honored the written word. 1045 01:05:49,720 --> 01:05:51,119 Okay! I get it. 1046 01:05:51,121 --> 01:05:52,352 Yeah, do you get it? 1047 01:05:52,354 --> 01:05:53,854 You better learn how to respect 1048 01:05:53,856 --> 01:05:54,923 what it is you're selling, 1049 01:05:54,925 --> 01:05:56,724 because it's my writing! 1050 01:05:56,726 --> 01:05:58,494 Well... 1051 01:05:59,463 --> 01:06:00,760 What? 1052 01:06:00,762 --> 01:06:03,530 I mean... 1053 01:06:03,532 --> 01:06:05,099 you're impersonating other people, 1054 01:06:05,101 --> 01:06:06,200 I mean, very well, I'm sure, 1055 01:06:06,202 --> 01:06:07,501 but come on. 1056 01:06:07,503 --> 01:06:09,872 Nobody is buying Lee Israel letters. 1057 01:06:15,579 --> 01:06:19,015 You steal from me again, and I'll fucking kill you. 1058 01:07:05,528 --> 01:07:06,827 This was your grandmother's? 1059 01:07:06,829 --> 01:07:10,064 Found it in her suitcase. I assume it's real. 1060 01:07:10,066 --> 01:07:11,198 Do you think it's real? 1061 01:07:11,200 --> 01:07:13,401 - Looks that way. - Good. 1062 01:07:13,403 --> 01:07:15,303 But there have been some forgeries going around, 1063 01:07:15,305 --> 01:07:16,771 so I'm gonna have to get it authenticated 1064 01:07:16,773 --> 01:07:18,972 before I can purchase it, if that's all right. 1065 01:07:18,974 --> 01:07:21,044 You brought it back, right? 1066 01:07:22,678 --> 01:07:24,611 I couldn't. I didn't know what to do. 1067 01:07:24,613 --> 01:07:26,981 You left it there? God, you idiot. 1068 01:07:26,983 --> 01:07:28,515 Stop calling me an idiot. 1069 01:07:28,517 --> 01:07:31,053 I'm gonna go to jail for this. 1070 01:07:31,055 --> 01:07:33,254 I'm just gonna kill myself first. 1071 01:07:33,256 --> 01:07:35,524 And you can't do this anymore. 1072 01:07:35,526 --> 01:07:37,358 Lee, come on. We can't stop now. 1073 01:07:37,360 --> 01:07:39,628 Well, everybody is on high alert. 1074 01:07:39,630 --> 01:07:42,430 I don't have a shot at paying that schmuck back. 1075 01:07:42,432 --> 01:07:44,497 Maybe you could steal more real ones 1076 01:07:44,499 --> 01:07:46,734 like you did at first, and I'll sell them. 1077 01:07:46,736 --> 01:07:48,669 Finding those letters was a complete fluke. 1078 01:07:48,671 --> 01:07:51,472 Well, where did the real ones go? Who has those? 1079 01:07:51,474 --> 01:07:54,075 Archives and museums. 1080 01:07:54,077 --> 01:07:57,311 And you have to have proof that you're doing research. 1081 01:07:57,313 --> 01:07:59,079 They don't just let anybody walk in. 1082 01:07:59,081 --> 01:08:02,585 You can get into archives. You're a famous writer. 1083 01:08:03,419 --> 01:08:05,954 You can steal the letters, copy them... 1084 01:08:05,956 --> 01:08:09,392 replace them with your copies, sell the originals. 1085 01:08:10,660 --> 01:08:13,294 In my sticky finger days... 1086 01:08:13,296 --> 01:08:14,928 I'd choose the thing that I wanted... 1087 01:08:14,930 --> 01:08:17,864 the things always had to come in boxes like toothpaste... 1088 01:08:17,866 --> 01:08:20,767 and then when nobody is paying attention, 1089 01:08:20,769 --> 01:08:22,602 I'd take the toothpaste out of the box, 1090 01:08:22,604 --> 01:08:23,805 slip it into my pocket, 1091 01:08:23,807 --> 01:08:26,641 and replace it with a used tube. 1092 01:08:26,643 --> 01:08:28,676 If anyone was suspicious, 1093 01:08:28,678 --> 01:08:33,080 they'd come back to the shelf and see nothing is missing. 1094 01:08:36,253 --> 01:08:37,621 Win-win, baby. 1095 01:08:39,857 --> 01:08:42,390 Well, not the store. 1096 01:08:42,392 --> 01:08:43,691 What do you mean? 1097 01:08:43,693 --> 01:08:47,761 Win-win doesn't apply to the story you just told. 1098 01:08:47,763 --> 01:08:49,898 You always put a downer on everything, you know. 1099 01:08:49,900 --> 01:08:51,932 Just eat your noodles. 1100 01:08:51,934 --> 01:08:54,668 She needs fresh water... 1101 01:08:54,670 --> 01:08:56,738 and two pills twice a day. 1102 01:08:56,740 --> 01:08:59,507 And you gotta mash it up in the... 1103 01:08:59,509 --> 01:09:00,909 Knock it off. 1104 01:09:00,911 --> 01:09:02,310 You gotta mash it up in the food like I showed you. 1105 01:09:02,312 --> 01:09:04,845 - I will. - No snooping. 1106 01:09:04,847 --> 01:09:07,347 Stay out of my bed, and no smoking. 1107 01:09:07,349 --> 01:09:09,186 Okay. 1108 01:09:11,054 --> 01:09:12,556 All right. 1109 01:10:00,269 --> 01:10:01,502 Can I help you? 1110 01:10:01,504 --> 01:10:04,571 Let's hope. I'm doing a in-depth look 1111 01:10:04,573 --> 01:10:06,172 at writers and alcoholism. 1112 01:10:06,174 --> 01:10:08,376 Hence, Lillian Hellman. 1113 01:10:08,378 --> 01:10:11,244 Here's my contract with my publisher. 1114 01:10:11,246 --> 01:10:13,513 I'm primarily interested in 1115 01:10:13,515 --> 01:10:16,051 more personal, archival materials. 1116 01:10:16,053 --> 01:10:17,784 You know, any kind of correspondence... 1117 01:10:17,786 --> 01:10:19,720 letters, diaries, journals. 1118 01:10:19,722 --> 01:10:21,625 I'll give you what we've got. 1119 01:10:25,027 --> 01:10:27,395 I told him I had to get it authenticated. 1120 01:10:27,397 --> 01:10:29,265 He seemed pretty nervous. 1121 01:10:38,273 --> 01:10:41,010 Does this look familiar? 1122 01:10:42,012 --> 01:10:43,577 Yes, I bought this from her. 1123 01:11:02,264 --> 01:11:03,565 Hello. 1124 01:11:15,745 --> 01:11:18,649 "Commissioned, Viking Press commissioned..." 1125 01:11:20,549 --> 01:11:21,783 What is all this stuff? 1126 01:11:21,785 --> 01:11:23,617 Why do you collect old typewriters? 1127 01:11:23,619 --> 01:11:27,957 It's too complicated to explain. It's my work. 1128 01:11:29,058 --> 01:11:31,628 I don't invite many people to my home. 1129 01:11:32,362 --> 01:11:33,962 I'm a very private person. 1130 01:11:33,964 --> 01:11:37,100 Well, I take it you're not much of a TV watcher. 1131 01:11:37,733 --> 01:11:40,968 Rots the brain. I don't believe in it. I'm a reader. 1132 01:11:42,272 --> 01:11:44,640 Hello, kitty. 1133 01:11:47,509 --> 01:11:49,579 What do you got here? 1134 01:11:49,946 --> 01:11:52,779 Oh, a little coke, a little dope... 1135 01:11:52,781 --> 01:11:55,751 and little old me. 1136 01:12:00,455 --> 01:12:02,793 Let's get this party started. 1137 01:12:09,732 --> 01:12:11,132 Hello? 1138 01:12:11,134 --> 01:12:12,300 Uh... 1139 01:12:12,302 --> 01:12:14,101 Hello. Elaine? 1140 01:12:14,103 --> 01:12:15,436 No. 1141 01:12:15,438 --> 01:12:16,870 Is she there? 1142 01:12:16,872 --> 01:12:19,507 No, would you like to leave a message? 1143 01:12:19,509 --> 01:12:21,542 Yes, this is Lee Israel. 1144 01:12:21,544 --> 01:12:23,377 Oh. 1145 01:12:25,581 --> 01:12:27,181 And who is this? 1146 01:12:27,183 --> 01:12:28,619 This is Marie. 1147 01:12:29,786 --> 01:12:31,618 Well, okay, Marie. 1148 01:12:31,620 --> 01:12:34,587 Could you please tell her that I called? 1149 01:12:34,589 --> 01:12:36,157 Same number. 1150 01:12:36,159 --> 01:12:37,995 Thank you. 1151 01:13:00,883 --> 01:13:03,720 Where is that bloody cat? 1152 01:13:12,762 --> 01:13:15,197 Psst-psst-psst-psst. 1153 01:13:16,366 --> 01:13:18,669 Two. 1154 01:13:23,874 --> 01:13:26,309 Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty. Psst. 1155 01:13:27,210 --> 01:13:28,574 Ugh. 1156 01:13:28,576 --> 01:13:30,211 Jersey. 1157 01:13:30,213 --> 01:13:32,413 Psst-psst-psst-psst. 1158 01:13:32,415 --> 01:13:34,681 Psst. Come and get it. 1159 01:13:34,683 --> 01:13:36,385 Come on. 1160 01:13:36,820 --> 01:13:39,022 Thank God. 1161 01:13:47,095 --> 01:13:48,865 Ma'am. 1162 01:13:50,666 --> 01:13:53,267 Good morning. The Lillian Hellman box 1163 01:13:53,269 --> 01:13:54,668 I was working on yesterday. 1164 01:13:54,670 --> 01:13:57,571 Ah, yes, the book on drunk authors. 1165 01:13:57,573 --> 01:13:59,205 Who else are you gonna be writing about? 1166 01:13:59,207 --> 01:14:01,812 You know what? I have a bus to catch. 1167 01:14:03,013 --> 01:14:04,645 Of course. 1168 01:14:04,647 --> 01:14:06,950 I'll get what you need. 1169 01:14:13,089 --> 01:14:14,890 Fuck. 1170 01:15:33,303 --> 01:15:36,069 Here you go. Sorry about the rush. 1171 01:15:36,071 --> 01:15:38,972 I get overly anxious when I travel. 1172 01:15:38,974 --> 01:15:42,845 Oh. Of course. I do, too. 1173 01:16:00,996 --> 01:16:03,133 - Thank you. - Yeah. 1174 01:16:17,746 --> 01:16:19,913 Jack? 1175 01:16:19,915 --> 01:16:23,018 Jersey, Mama's home. 1176 01:16:29,058 --> 01:16:32,059 What has he done to our home? 1177 01:16:32,061 --> 01:16:33,694 Huh? 1178 01:16:33,696 --> 01:16:35,931 Where are you? 1179 01:16:36,433 --> 01:16:38,231 Aha. 1180 01:16:38,233 --> 01:16:40,001 Hey, there. 1181 01:16:40,003 --> 01:16:42,238 You hiding, huh? 1182 01:16:53,448 --> 01:16:56,018 Oh, shit. 1183 01:16:56,786 --> 01:17:00,721 All right. I know it looks bad, Lee, but... 1184 01:17:00,723 --> 01:17:02,623 Get out. 1185 01:17:02,625 --> 01:17:04,091 All right. 1186 01:17:04,093 --> 01:17:07,694 I couldn't resist him. He's so adorable. 1187 01:17:07,696 --> 01:17:08,861 You have to understand, Lee. 1188 01:17:08,863 --> 01:17:10,597 Get out of my house. 1189 01:17:10,599 --> 01:17:12,033 Why? 1190 01:17:12,035 --> 01:17:14,334 What's happened? 1191 01:17:14,336 --> 01:17:15,636 My cat is dead! 1192 01:17:15,638 --> 01:17:17,504 What? Oh, no. 1193 01:17:17,506 --> 01:17:19,006 What's going on? 1194 01:17:19,008 --> 01:17:21,874 Oh, for fuck's sake, get the fuck out of my house! 1195 01:17:21,876 --> 01:17:23,177 Darling, I can explain. 1196 01:17:23,179 --> 01:17:25,445 Okay, this is too fucked up for me. 1197 01:17:25,447 --> 01:17:28,016 Lee, I'm so sorry. It's not my fault. 1198 01:17:28,018 --> 01:17:30,685 It must have just happened right now. 1199 01:17:30,687 --> 01:17:33,354 Get out. Get out! Get out! 1200 01:17:33,356 --> 01:17:36,159 Sorry. I did what you... 1201 01:18:15,531 --> 01:18:17,131 Oh, hi, Miss Israel. 1202 01:18:17,133 --> 01:18:19,501 Is Jersey okay? 1203 01:18:22,472 --> 01:18:24,640 Oh, no. I'm so sorry. 1204 01:18:27,476 --> 01:18:29,409 Um, I don't have a backyard or anything, 1205 01:18:29,411 --> 01:18:31,645 so I wasn't sure what to do with her. 1206 01:18:31,647 --> 01:18:35,552 It's okay. We can... They can take care of that here. 1207 01:19:09,117 --> 01:19:11,787 Thanks for coming. 1208 01:19:12,888 --> 01:19:14,456 It sounded important. 1209 01:19:15,625 --> 01:19:16,556 It is. 1210 01:19:16,558 --> 01:19:20,227 Looks like you brought Jersey with you. 1211 01:19:20,229 --> 01:19:22,665 How is that old bitch? 1212 01:19:23,197 --> 01:19:25,065 That's what I wanted to talk to you about. 1213 01:19:25,067 --> 01:19:27,133 She, uh... 1214 01:19:27,135 --> 01:19:29,438 - She just died. - Oh. 1215 01:19:30,406 --> 01:19:33,039 I just figured, since she was a gift from you... 1216 01:19:33,041 --> 01:19:34,811 Was she? 1217 01:19:36,745 --> 01:19:39,113 I got too attached to her. 1218 01:19:39,115 --> 01:19:40,981 Getting another one? 1219 01:19:40,983 --> 01:19:42,882 No. 1220 01:19:42,884 --> 01:19:44,952 No, I couldn't replace her. 1221 01:19:44,954 --> 01:19:46,986 That wouldn't feel right. 1222 01:19:46,988 --> 01:19:49,392 Maybe in time. 1223 01:19:52,128 --> 01:19:55,395 You know, I still go to Aunt Eleanor's 1224 01:19:55,397 --> 01:19:57,498 pretty regularly. 1225 01:19:57,500 --> 01:20:00,333 Oh, my God. I haven't thought about that place in years. 1226 01:20:00,335 --> 01:20:03,037 It's still there? On Ninety-Six? 1227 01:20:03,039 --> 01:20:05,439 Exactly the same. 1228 01:20:05,441 --> 01:20:08,911 I mean, you know, different cats. 1229 01:20:09,245 --> 01:20:11,611 You still on Eighty-Second? 1230 01:20:11,613 --> 01:20:13,648 Where else would I be? 1231 01:20:14,049 --> 01:20:17,420 You all right? You look all right. 1232 01:20:18,620 --> 01:20:21,690 You can't imagine what I've done to survive. 1233 01:20:22,858 --> 01:20:24,794 Are you sleeping, Lee? 1234 01:20:25,728 --> 01:20:27,430 Fits and starts. 1235 01:20:28,330 --> 01:20:31,731 I was just supposed to be... 1236 01:20:31,733 --> 01:20:34,868 something more than this. 1237 01:20:34,870 --> 01:20:36,002 I mean, wasn't I? 1238 01:20:36,004 --> 01:20:39,273 That's why you wanted to see me. 1239 01:20:39,275 --> 01:20:42,112 No, I needed to see you. 1240 01:20:43,946 --> 01:20:46,580 I'm having a crisis here. 1241 01:20:46,582 --> 01:20:48,382 And you know me. 1242 01:20:48,384 --> 01:20:49,315 No, Lee. 1243 01:20:49,317 --> 01:20:51,118 There was always a wall between us. 1244 01:20:51,120 --> 01:20:53,423 Something I couldn't penetrate. 1245 01:20:55,624 --> 01:20:57,123 I tried. 1246 01:20:57,125 --> 01:20:58,458 You know, God damn it, Elaine, 1247 01:20:58,460 --> 01:21:01,895 I tried more with you than anybody else ever. 1248 01:21:01,897 --> 01:21:04,199 No, you didn't. 1249 01:21:04,933 --> 01:21:07,168 You did everything you could to keep your distance. 1250 01:21:07,170 --> 01:21:09,836 You lied, you drank constantly, 1251 01:21:09,838 --> 01:21:11,137 you were self-involved. 1252 01:21:11,139 --> 01:21:13,207 Well, I didn't say I was perfect. 1253 01:21:13,209 --> 01:21:15,144 You were so miserable. 1254 01:21:17,278 --> 01:21:19,448 - No, I wasn't. - Yes, you were. 1255 01:21:20,215 --> 01:21:22,282 I tried to get you to trust me. 1256 01:21:22,284 --> 01:21:25,487 Certain point, I just stopped trying. 1257 01:21:27,756 --> 01:21:30,626 Yeah, I wish you hadn't. 1258 01:21:31,626 --> 01:21:35,428 Well, you don't have to go yet. Come on. 1259 01:21:35,430 --> 01:21:38,664 Lee, it's not my job anymore. 1260 01:21:38,666 --> 01:21:42,938 To talk you off the ledge. It's exhausting. 1261 01:21:46,209 --> 01:21:48,278 I got a class. 1262 01:21:51,612 --> 01:21:53,547 Let them authenticate all they want. 1263 01:21:53,549 --> 01:21:55,082 They're real. Don't settle. 1264 01:21:55,084 --> 01:21:58,251 Lee. Are we gonna talk about it? 1265 01:21:58,253 --> 01:21:59,686 I mean, I'm really sorry. 1266 01:21:59,688 --> 01:22:01,721 Okay, afterwards, you come here immediately. 1267 01:22:01,723 --> 01:22:04,190 I'll do good. You'll see, Lee. I'll make it up to you. 1268 01:22:04,192 --> 01:22:05,325 And get a written receipt. 1269 01:22:05,327 --> 01:22:06,894 I wanna know how much you get paid. 1270 01:22:06,896 --> 01:22:08,360 Oh, come on. 1271 01:22:08,362 --> 01:22:11,132 How long are you gonna freeze me out, huh? 1272 01:22:11,134 --> 01:22:12,865 I trusted you. 1273 01:22:12,867 --> 01:22:16,102 I don't know if you've noticed this, but I don't do that. 1274 01:22:16,104 --> 01:22:18,038 And you have reminded me why that is. 1275 01:22:18,040 --> 01:22:21,775 Lee, I took care of your cat. I swear. 1276 01:22:21,777 --> 01:22:24,244 It was an accident, and I feel awful. 1277 01:22:24,246 --> 01:22:25,544 We will continue to work together 1278 01:22:25,546 --> 01:22:27,114 because I have no other option. 1279 01:22:27,116 --> 01:22:28,347 But we are not friends, 1280 01:22:28,349 --> 01:22:29,983 and I don't think we actually ever were. 1281 01:22:29,985 --> 01:22:31,485 Lee. Lee. 1282 01:22:31,487 --> 01:22:33,153 We will meet in public, 1283 01:22:33,155 --> 01:22:34,354 and you will not fuck this up like 1284 01:22:34,356 --> 01:22:36,023 you fuck everything else up in your life. 1285 01:22:36,025 --> 01:22:37,925 You will sell those papers, you will get the money, 1286 01:22:37,927 --> 01:22:39,461 you will bring me a receipt. 1287 01:22:41,330 --> 01:22:43,633 I'll be back after the sale. 1288 01:22:53,442 --> 01:22:55,478 Aren't they fabulous? 1289 01:22:56,312 --> 01:22:58,848 I just know someone is going to treasure them. 1290 01:23:04,219 --> 01:23:06,686 I need another one. 1291 01:23:06,688 --> 01:23:08,691 That's debatable. 1292 01:23:10,325 --> 01:23:11,661 How much do you want for them? 1293 01:23:12,327 --> 01:23:14,563 I was thinking $300, each. 1294 01:23:17,900 --> 01:23:20,036 Actually, do you have cash? 1295 01:23:24,807 --> 01:23:26,442 That's 500. 1296 01:23:26,842 --> 01:23:28,478 $600. 1297 01:23:29,777 --> 01:23:30,979 Thank you so much. 1298 01:23:39,187 --> 01:23:41,356 - Come on, right here. - Mm-mmm. 1299 01:23:42,089 --> 01:23:44,792 No. I'm waiting for somebody. 1300 01:23:44,794 --> 01:23:46,193 It's clearly marked. 1301 01:23:46,195 --> 01:23:48,160 I'm pretty sure they were stolen, 1302 01:23:48,162 --> 01:23:50,967 but I didn't want to ask. 1303 01:23:51,433 --> 01:23:53,300 She asked me to sell them for her as a favor... 1304 01:23:53,302 --> 01:23:56,736 so, I said, "Of course I will." 1305 01:23:56,738 --> 01:23:57,839 As a favor? 1306 01:23:59,073 --> 01:24:00,774 You don't accept a cut? 1307 01:24:00,776 --> 01:24:02,810 Well, a small one. 1308 01:24:02,812 --> 01:24:03,877 Very small. 1309 01:24:05,247 --> 01:24:06,883 You know what? 1310 01:24:11,286 --> 01:24:13,720 Oh, I got him. That's... 1311 01:24:17,660 --> 01:24:21,494 Lee Israel? I'm Agent Solanas. This is Agent Doyle. 1312 01:24:21,496 --> 01:24:22,930 We're here to deliver a subpoena 1313 01:24:22,932 --> 01:24:25,199 to appear before a federal grand jury. 1314 01:24:25,201 --> 01:24:28,834 Your appearance is scheduled for two weeks from today. 1315 01:24:28,836 --> 01:24:31,504 We've intercepted your employee, Jack Hock. 1316 01:24:31,506 --> 01:24:32,873 He's cooperating, 1317 01:24:32,875 --> 01:24:35,242 as are the dealers you've done business with. 1318 01:24:35,244 --> 01:24:36,575 Mr. Hock requests 1319 01:24:36,577 --> 01:24:37,910 that you do not try to reach him 1320 01:24:37,912 --> 01:24:41,116 or telephone or harass him in any way. 1321 01:24:42,250 --> 01:24:43,617 You are forbidden to destroy 1322 01:24:43,619 --> 01:24:46,822 any evidence pertinent to this case. 1323 01:25:08,878 --> 01:25:09,946 Headache? 1324 01:25:10,979 --> 01:25:12,048 Awful. 1325 01:25:13,415 --> 01:25:15,184 Can't say I blame you. 1326 01:25:15,951 --> 01:25:18,721 Looking at this stuff, it is pretty bad. 1327 01:25:19,955 --> 01:25:23,626 We're probably looking at some time behind bars. 1328 01:25:26,428 --> 01:25:30,763 That said, these letters are pretty incredible. 1329 01:25:30,765 --> 01:25:33,536 I especially enjoyed the Louise Brooks. 1330 01:25:35,137 --> 01:25:37,072 Thank you. 1331 01:25:38,807 --> 01:25:40,641 Look, if you want me to represent you... 1332 01:25:40,643 --> 01:25:41,909 there are a few things you're going to 1333 01:25:41,911 --> 01:25:43,646 have to do before appearing in court. 1334 01:25:44,213 --> 01:25:45,278 Like what? 1335 01:25:45,280 --> 01:25:46,579 Clean up your act. 1336 01:25:46,581 --> 01:25:48,914 First, you're getting a job. Any kind of job. 1337 01:25:48,916 --> 01:25:50,784 Second, you're enrolling in community service 1338 01:25:50,786 --> 01:25:52,618 to show just how penitent you are. 1339 01:25:52,620 --> 01:25:55,187 What? What kind of service? 1340 01:25:55,189 --> 01:25:56,856 Something with children. 1341 01:25:56,858 --> 01:25:58,925 Ah, Jesus. No. 1342 01:25:58,927 --> 01:26:01,694 Animals, then. Sick people, whatever. 1343 01:26:01,696 --> 01:26:05,434 You have to show that you've turned over a new leaf. 1344 01:26:07,603 --> 01:26:09,138 And you've got to go to AA. 1345 01:26:17,045 --> 01:26:19,578 Can I ask you a question? 1346 01:26:19,580 --> 01:26:22,083 Everyone I sold to... 1347 01:26:24,753 --> 01:26:26,555 do you think they all know? 1348 01:26:28,823 --> 01:26:32,428 Yeah. They all probably know. 1349 01:26:33,228 --> 01:26:35,932 But right now, that's the least of your worries. 1350 01:26:45,406 --> 01:26:46,640 She is seeking employment 1351 01:26:46,642 --> 01:26:49,275 with Scholastic Books as a copy editor 1352 01:26:49,277 --> 01:26:50,577 and has already put in 1353 01:26:50,579 --> 01:26:52,980 over 40 hours of community service 1354 01:26:52,982 --> 01:26:55,551 at a cat shelter. 1355 01:27:01,290 --> 01:27:02,922 Before I render my verdict, 1356 01:27:02,924 --> 01:27:04,891 have you, in the last 24 hours, 1357 01:27:04,893 --> 01:27:07,593 used drugs, pills, alcohol... 1358 01:27:07,595 --> 01:27:09,328 anything that could affect your ability 1359 01:27:09,330 --> 01:27:11,500 to understand what's going on? 1360 01:27:12,602 --> 01:27:13,733 Uh, no, ma'am. 1361 01:27:13,735 --> 01:27:14,801 Have you anything additionally 1362 01:27:14,803 --> 01:27:15,901 you'd like to say to the court 1363 01:27:15,903 --> 01:27:17,772 before I offer your sentence? 1364 01:27:18,374 --> 01:27:19,876 Yes. 1365 01:27:26,715 --> 01:27:29,716 "I have been living in a state of enormous guilt 1366 01:27:29,718 --> 01:27:33,686 "and anxiety for many months." 1367 01:27:33,688 --> 01:27:35,922 Not so much because 1368 01:27:35,924 --> 01:27:38,091 I felt like what I was doing was wrong 1369 01:27:38,093 --> 01:27:44,396 but because I was just always afraid of being found out. 1370 01:27:44,398 --> 01:27:48,635 I can't specifically say that I regret any of my actions. 1371 01:27:48,637 --> 01:27:49,906 Lee. 1372 01:27:51,506 --> 01:27:53,808 I don't. 1373 01:27:57,112 --> 01:28:02,552 I mean, in many ways, this has been the best time of my life. 1374 01:28:06,521 --> 01:28:10,757 I mean, it's the only time... 1375 01:28:10,759 --> 01:28:15,931 recently, that I can remember being proud of my work. 1376 01:28:17,665 --> 01:28:20,833 But it wasn't really my work, was it? 1377 01:28:20,835 --> 01:28:21,734 I mean... 1378 01:28:21,736 --> 01:28:25,904 if I had put in my work... 1379 01:28:25,906 --> 01:28:31,780 then I would've been opening myself up to criticism. 1380 01:28:34,148 --> 01:28:39,988 And I'm too much of a coward to do that. 1381 01:28:44,794 --> 01:28:47,162 Then I lost my cat. 1382 01:28:49,296 --> 01:28:52,099 She was probably the only soul 1383 01:28:52,101 --> 01:28:54,937 that truly loved me. Maybe ever. 1384 01:28:58,272 --> 01:29:00,440 And I lost my friend... 1385 01:29:00,442 --> 01:29:03,377 who may have been an idiot, but he... 1386 01:29:03,379 --> 01:29:06,015 he tolerated me. 1387 01:29:06,749 --> 01:29:09,818 And he was nice to have around. 1388 01:29:10,552 --> 01:29:14,089 And I think I have realized that I am... 1389 01:29:16,625 --> 01:29:19,095 ...not a real writer. 1390 01:29:21,396 --> 01:29:23,099 And that... 1391 01:29:23,965 --> 01:29:25,668 ...I think, in the end, it... 1392 01:29:26,401 --> 01:29:30,639 ...I would say, was not worth it. 1393 01:29:32,640 --> 01:29:34,343 I would say that. 1394 01:29:36,245 --> 01:29:37,444 Uh... 1395 01:29:37,446 --> 01:29:40,713 "I will accept the judgment of the court as valid 1396 01:29:40,715 --> 01:29:45,052 "and fulfill whatever sentence I may receive... 1397 01:29:46,254 --> 01:29:49,691 "...with full understanding that I have earned... 1398 01:29:51,492 --> 01:29:52,995 "...said punishment." 1399 01:30:00,602 --> 01:30:02,668 Lee Israel, the court sentences you 1400 01:30:02,670 --> 01:30:04,303 to five years' probation 1401 01:30:04,305 --> 01:30:06,739 plus six months' house arrest. 1402 01:30:06,741 --> 01:30:08,641 You may only leave home to go 1403 01:30:08,643 --> 01:30:10,543 to and from your place of employment, 1404 01:30:10,545 --> 01:30:11,878 your work in the community, 1405 01:30:11,880 --> 01:30:14,347 and to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. 1406 01:30:14,349 --> 01:30:17,583 You are not to leave the state or consort with felons, 1407 01:30:17,585 --> 01:30:19,185 and you are to pay restitution 1408 01:30:19,187 --> 01:30:21,922 to your victims within your means. 1409 01:30:21,924 --> 01:30:24,293 Thank you, Your Honor. 1410 01:30:32,300 --> 01:30:34,402 This is a good thing. 1411 01:30:35,303 --> 01:30:37,303 Very fair. 1412 01:30:37,305 --> 01:30:39,306 Mmm. 1413 01:30:39,308 --> 01:30:40,507 Good. 1414 01:30:40,509 --> 01:30:42,111 Yeah. 1415 01:30:46,714 --> 01:30:48,284 Mm-mmm. 1416 01:33:09,723 --> 01:33:12,025 Thanks for coming. 1417 01:33:12,027 --> 01:33:14,793 It was quite inconvenient. 1418 01:33:14,795 --> 01:33:16,331 I moved some meetings around. 1419 01:33:18,933 --> 01:33:21,367 Can I get you a drink? I'm buying. 1420 01:33:22,537 --> 01:33:24,169 Not today. 1421 01:33:24,171 --> 01:33:29,476 My new meds make gin taste like mouthwash. 1422 01:33:29,478 --> 01:33:31,580 Takes the fun out of it. 1423 01:33:34,115 --> 01:33:36,684 I guess you cut a deal? 1424 01:33:36,951 --> 01:33:38,918 Ratting on me worked out? 1425 01:33:38,920 --> 01:33:41,287 Three years' probation. 1426 01:33:41,289 --> 01:33:42,888 At least you're out and about. 1427 01:33:42,890 --> 01:33:44,291 So are you. 1428 01:33:44,293 --> 01:33:47,493 No. I'm at an AA meeting on Tenth Street right now. 1429 01:33:49,564 --> 01:33:52,065 Criminals at large. 1430 01:33:52,067 --> 01:33:54,766 I can't imagine what was so important 1431 01:33:54,768 --> 01:33:57,369 that Lee Israel swallowed her pride 1432 01:33:57,371 --> 01:34:00,342 and asked to meet me, so spit it out. 1433 01:34:03,445 --> 01:34:06,011 I've been thinking about writing a new book. 1434 01:34:06,013 --> 01:34:09,414 About what happened, and... 1435 01:34:09,416 --> 01:34:12,552 what I did, and... 1436 01:34:12,554 --> 01:34:14,587 about you, if you'll let me. 1437 01:34:14,589 --> 01:34:16,523 Like hell I will. 1438 01:34:16,525 --> 01:34:17,891 What will my boyfriend say 1439 01:34:17,893 --> 01:34:20,760 if he heard about my shadier dealings? 1440 01:34:20,762 --> 01:34:22,962 I doubt our crimes even rank 1441 01:34:22,964 --> 01:34:25,731 on your top ten of shady dealings. 1442 01:34:25,733 --> 01:34:27,432 Fair enough. 1443 01:34:27,434 --> 01:34:29,235 But I don't want a book out there about me. 1444 01:34:29,237 --> 01:34:32,041 I'm a very private person. 1445 01:34:33,174 --> 01:34:37,543 I need to do something, and I need to write again. 1446 01:34:37,545 --> 01:34:38,878 Mmm. 1447 01:34:38,880 --> 01:34:42,047 What about Fanny... Price? 1448 01:34:42,049 --> 01:34:45,053 God damn. It's Brice. 1449 01:34:46,688 --> 01:34:49,355 As terrifying as it sounds, I... 1450 01:34:49,357 --> 01:34:52,393 I think I'm supposed to be writing about us. 1451 01:34:54,897 --> 01:34:56,729 I'm still mad at you, you know. 1452 01:34:56,731 --> 01:34:58,800 You treated me like shit. 1453 01:34:59,500 --> 01:35:01,669 I don't think you're a very nice person, Lee. 1454 01:35:02,737 --> 01:35:04,406 I would agree with you. 1455 01:35:07,107 --> 01:35:09,842 I suppose you might be mad at me as well. 1456 01:35:09,844 --> 01:35:13,678 Well, I mean, if you didn't look so decrepit, I might be. 1457 01:35:13,680 --> 01:35:15,215 Yeah, well... 1458 01:35:15,217 --> 01:35:18,519 it was gonna catch up to me eventually. 1459 01:35:19,653 --> 01:35:22,521 You did fuck your way through Manhattan, I mean... 1460 01:35:25,058 --> 01:35:27,461 I'd like that on my tombstone. 1461 01:35:40,509 --> 01:35:42,244 Could you make me 29? 1462 01:35:44,446 --> 01:35:45,345 With perfect skin. 1463 01:35:45,347 --> 01:35:48,082 Don't make me sound stupid. Hmm? 1464 01:35:57,092 --> 01:35:59,327 Thank you. 1465 01:36:06,233 --> 01:36:08,336 I'm late for a board meeting. 1466 01:36:09,071 --> 01:36:11,305 My driver's waiting. 1467 01:36:13,575 --> 01:36:15,874 Life of a millionaire. 1468 01:36:15,876 --> 01:36:18,513 What? 1469 01:36:21,683 --> 01:36:25,885 I had such an urge to trip you just then. 1470 01:36:27,255 --> 01:36:29,290 Wow. 1471 01:36:36,063 --> 01:36:38,832 You're a horrid cunt, Lee. 1472 01:36:38,834 --> 01:36:41,503 You too, Jack. 1473 01:37:23,612 --> 01:37:26,378 Jack would not tell me what story he'd cook up 1474 01:37:26,380 --> 01:37:29,649 to explain his possession of the letters. 1475 01:37:29,651 --> 01:37:31,450 Nor would he take any suggestions 1476 01:37:31,452 --> 01:37:33,752 from me about a backstory. 1477 01:37:33,754 --> 01:37:37,422 It didn't finally matter, because he was succeeding. 1478 01:37:37,424 --> 01:37:40,258 He always got the price he asked for. 1479 01:37:40,260 --> 01:37:42,828 His narratives, whatever they were, 1480 01:37:42,830 --> 01:37:44,096 kept my rent paid 1481 01:37:44,098 --> 01:37:46,364 and his mouth full of large, gorgeous, 1482 01:37:46,366 --> 01:37:49,034 extraordinarily white teeth. 1483 01:38:28,110 --> 01:38:30,810 I have a friend's birthday coming up. 1484 01:38:30,812 --> 01:38:31,944 You know, he would love to own 1485 01:38:31,946 --> 01:38:33,412 that Dorothy Parker in the window. 1486 01:38:33,414 --> 01:38:36,449 Ah. She's a beauty, isn't she? 1487 01:38:36,451 --> 01:38:39,452 Can I ask you how much a letter like that runs? 1488 01:38:39,454 --> 01:38:42,320 We're asking 1,900, framed and matted, 1489 01:38:42,322 --> 01:38:45,324 and it comes with a letter of authenticity. 1490 01:38:45,326 --> 01:38:46,726 Does the letter of authenticity 1491 01:38:46,728 --> 01:38:48,662 come with a letter of authenticity? 1492 01:38:48,664 --> 01:38:49,761 No. 1493 01:38:49,763 --> 01:38:52,398 I can assure you it's the real thing. 1494 01:38:52,400 --> 01:38:54,266 No one can write like Miss Parker could. 1495 01:38:54,268 --> 01:38:57,305 Not before and not since. 1496 01:38:57,673 --> 01:39:00,739 My dear sir, I offer my droopy salutations 1497 01:39:00,741 --> 01:39:02,141 from the great beyond. 1498 01:39:02,143 --> 01:39:05,144 I understand that you are selling my personal letters 1499 01:39:05,146 --> 01:39:07,413 to the tune of nearly two grand. 1500 01:39:07,415 --> 01:39:09,181 To think poor Lee Israel 1501 01:39:09,183 --> 01:39:10,784 received a tiny fraction of that sum 1502 01:39:10,786 --> 01:39:14,620 when she sold them to someone, who then sold them to you. 1503 01:39:14,622 --> 01:39:16,455 I dearly hope that this letter 1504 01:39:16,457 --> 01:39:18,024 will not affect the selling price 1505 01:39:18,026 --> 01:39:20,359 of your valuable artifact. 1506 01:39:20,361 --> 01:39:22,194 As I most famously muttered 1507 01:39:22,196 --> 01:39:24,363 mere moments after my cremation, 1508 01:39:24,365 --> 01:39:27,099 "Darling, excuse my dust." 1509 01:39:27,101 --> 01:39:29,905 Yours, Dorothy Parker. 1510 01:41:39,237 --> 01:41:41,333 Subtitles by explosiveskull 1510 01:41:42,305 --> 01:41:48,312 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 105531

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