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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,265 --> 00:00:04,994 Attention, squad. 2 00:00:05,038 --> 00:00:06,580 Put your hands together 3 00:00:06,616 --> 00:00:09,424 for the long-anticipated reunion of... 4 00:00:09,460 --> 00:00:12,219 The DDC! 5 00:00:12,263 --> 00:00:13,220 - DD... - C! 6 00:00:13,264 --> 00:00:14,221 - DD... - C! 7 00:00:14,265 --> 00:00:15,222 Put a J with a G... 8 00:00:15,266 --> 00:00:16,267 You get DD... 9 00:00:16,310 --> 00:00:18,225 C! 10 00:00:18,269 --> 00:00:19,400 Uh, the gas face. 11 00:00:19,444 --> 00:00:20,575 What the hell is the DDC? 12 00:00:20,619 --> 00:00:21,924 I don't know, but I love it! 13 00:00:21,968 --> 00:00:23,274 The DDC is the Dope... 14 00:00:23,317 --> 00:00:24,405 - Denim... - Crew. 15 00:00:24,449 --> 00:00:25,754 Our 20-year high school reunion 16 00:00:25,798 --> 00:00:27,713 is tonight, and the party is '90s-themed, 17 00:00:27,756 --> 00:00:29,410 so we're dressing the way we did back then, 18 00:00:29,454 --> 00:00:31,456 AKA hella fresh. 19 00:00:31,499 --> 00:00:33,545 Can't wait to see everyone we graduated with 20 00:00:33,588 --> 00:00:35,416 and lie to them about what I've been up to 21 00:00:35,460 --> 00:00:36,939 for my own amusement. 22 00:00:36,983 --> 00:00:40,116 It's gonna be Fib City, population: Gina Clooney. 23 00:00:40,160 --> 00:00:41,335 But Jake, how can you be excited 24 00:00:41,379 --> 00:00:42,945 to return to your high school, 25 00:00:42,989 --> 00:00:44,599 the scene of... Tattlegate? 26 00:00:44,643 --> 00:00:46,912 What's Tattlegate? Why haven't I heard anything about it? 27 00:00:46,948 --> 00:00:49,648 It was junior year and Jake was riding high... 28 00:00:49,691 --> 00:00:52,191 Charles, no one wants to hear this story... 29 00:00:52,477 --> 00:00:53,434 from you. 30 00:00:53,478 --> 00:00:56,437 It was junior year, and Jake was riding high. 31 00:00:56,481 --> 00:00:58,526 Sophomore year was rough, but now I was back 32 00:00:58,570 --> 00:01:01,137 with a hot new look: an earring and long hair. 33 00:01:01,181 --> 00:01:02,791 Which was my look, and he just copied it. 34 00:01:02,835 --> 00:01:04,793 And it worked! I was finally cool, 35 00:01:04,837 --> 00:01:06,404 and becoming friends with the most popular kid 36 00:01:06,447 --> 00:01:08,536 in school: Brandon Bliss. 37 00:01:08,580 --> 00:01:10,408 - Dope name; sounds hot. - He was hot, Rosa. 38 00:01:10,451 --> 00:01:12,279 For the record, he could barely read. 39 00:01:12,323 --> 00:01:13,717 He didn't have to read, Gina. 40 00:01:13,753 --> 00:01:15,570 He lost his virginity when he was 12 years old. 41 00:01:15,606 --> 00:01:16,881 Which is horrifying. 42 00:01:16,917 --> 00:01:17,914 But it wasn't back then! 43 00:01:17,950 --> 00:01:20,655 Back then, it was... everything. 44 00:01:20,804 --> 00:01:22,463 He asked me to ditch class one day with him 45 00:01:22,507 --> 00:01:23,812 and his buddies, steal a school van, 46 00:01:23,856 --> 00:01:25,423 and go get drunk at his parents' cabin, 47 00:01:25,466 --> 00:01:26,989 but the day before we were supposed to go, 48 00:01:27,033 --> 00:01:29,601 someone ratted Brandon out, and he got suspended! 49 00:01:29,644 --> 00:01:31,167 He thought I was the one who told, 50 00:01:31,211 --> 00:01:32,517 and from that day forward, 51 00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:34,693 everyone called me "The Tattler." 52 00:01:34,736 --> 00:01:36,390 Tattler. It's a sexy nickname. 53 00:01:36,434 --> 00:01:37,857 It was not a sexy nickname! 54 00:01:37,893 --> 00:01:39,175 It was a scarlet letter, 55 00:01:39,219 --> 00:01:40,906 and it ruined my senior year, 56 00:01:41,352 --> 00:01:44,006 but luckily, I'm over all that now. 57 00:01:44,050 --> 00:01:45,971 Not me. I'm gonna go to this reunion tonight 58 00:01:46,007 --> 00:01:47,338 and kick Brandon Bliss in the butthole. 59 00:01:47,374 --> 00:01:49,449 Horrifying, but that won't be necessary, Charles, 60 00:01:49,485 --> 00:01:51,536 for my awesome life will do the butthole-kicking this eve. 61 00:01:51,579 --> 00:01:53,668 I've got a sweet job, and a super-smart, 62 00:01:53,712 --> 00:01:55,409 incredible wife. Tonight's gonna be awesome. 63 00:01:55,453 --> 00:01:56,863 - Right, Gina? - Damn straight! 64 00:01:56,899 --> 00:01:58,064 - DD... - C! 65 00:01:58,107 --> 00:01:59,152 - DD... - C! 66 00:01:59,195 --> 00:02:00,153 - DD... - C! 67 00:02:15,355 --> 00:02:19,355 Sync & corrections by emeline-whovian www.addic7ed.com 68 00:02:21,435 --> 00:02:23,089 Wow, this place hasn't changed 69 00:02:23,132 --> 00:02:24,786 one bit in 20 years. 70 00:02:24,830 --> 00:02:26,947 It's a real indictment of the public school system. 71 00:02:26,983 --> 00:02:28,630 Jake! Tina! 72 00:02:28,666 --> 00:02:30,662 No way! Mikey J! 73 00:02:30,705 --> 00:02:32,185 Amy, this is Mike Joseph, 74 00:02:32,228 --> 00:02:35,797 AKA the lead funk bassist from my legendary ska band, 75 00:02:35,841 --> 00:02:39,018 Skalvester Skallone. We had one song. 76 00:02:39,061 --> 00:02:40,236 ? Oh ? 77 00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:42,453 ? Stop or my mom will ska ? 78 00:02:43,326 --> 00:02:45,154 ? Stop or my mom will ska ? 79 00:02:45,198 --> 00:02:46,852 - Whoa! - Hey, man. 80 00:02:46,895 --> 00:02:49,550 We were so bad. I can't believe we thought we were gonna make it. 81 00:02:49,594 --> 00:02:51,186 So what have you been up to, man? 82 00:02:51,222 --> 00:02:53,442 Well, I'm still trying to get the music thing started. 83 00:02:53,598 --> 00:02:55,375 Oh, cool, cool, cool. Never give up. 84 00:02:55,411 --> 00:02:57,558 Anyway, how are you, Gina? What have you been up to? 85 00:02:57,602 --> 00:02:59,430 Nothing crazy. Yeah, just writing 86 00:02:59,473 --> 00:03:01,344 - those "Thor" movies. - Seriously? 87 00:03:01,388 --> 00:03:03,085 Oh, my God. Tell me everything. 88 00:03:03,129 --> 00:03:05,436 Legally, I can't get into it too much, 89 00:03:05,479 --> 00:03:06,698 but just know that the next one 90 00:03:06,741 --> 00:03:08,221 will have a lot more full frontal. 91 00:03:08,264 --> 00:03:10,947 Well, if you need some ska for your soundtrack... 92 00:03:10,983 --> 00:03:12,001 Oh! 93 00:03:12,399 --> 00:03:13,444 This is them. This is Marvel. 94 00:03:13,487 --> 00:03:17,665 They probably want to talk about "Thor 4: More Thor." I gotta take this. 95 00:03:17,709 --> 00:03:18,753 - Okay? - All right. 96 00:03:18,981 --> 00:03:20,591 So how you doing, Jake? 97 00:03:20,627 --> 00:03:23,236 I know the end of high school was a little... rough. 98 00:03:23,279 --> 00:03:24,846 Oh, uh... 99 00:03:24,890 --> 00:03:27,283 Jake's killing it now. He's a detective. 100 00:03:27,327 --> 00:03:30,069 Irie, mon! Irie, irie! 101 00:03:30,112 --> 00:03:31,244 Very nice. 102 00:03:31,287 --> 00:03:33,376 God, you must have some crazy stories. 103 00:03:33,420 --> 00:03:35,683 Oh, I don't know. I mean, is successfully negotiating 104 00:03:35,727 --> 00:03:38,773 a high-tension hostage situation in a bank crazy? 105 00:03:38,817 --> 00:03:39,818 Yes! 106 00:03:39,861 --> 00:03:41,210 Oh, well, then, I guess I do have 107 00:03:41,254 --> 00:03:42,951 some crazy stories, mon! 108 00:03:44,344 --> 00:03:47,086 Gosh, it's so cool how we all still dress the same. 109 00:03:49,001 --> 00:03:50,785 Is it so much to ask? You know what I'm saying? 110 00:03:50,829 --> 00:03:52,483 Why is everyone gathered around the radio? 111 00:03:52,526 --> 00:03:54,746 Ooh, are they testing the emergency broadcasting system? 112 00:03:54,789 --> 00:03:56,269 What? No. 113 00:03:56,312 --> 00:03:57,662 We're listening to a contest. 114 00:03:57,705 --> 00:03:59,490 This is 93.7, 115 00:03:59,533 --> 00:04:00,882 The Jamhouse, with... 116 00:04:00,926 --> 00:04:02,797 JC and the Horndog! 117 00:04:03,842 --> 00:04:05,191 FM radio... 118 00:04:05,234 --> 00:04:07,323 Yeah, the hosts are beyond disgusting, 119 00:04:07,367 --> 00:04:10,022 but they do a fun game where they play a mystery sound 120 00:04:10,065 --> 00:04:11,893 and callers guess what it is for a cash prize. 121 00:04:11,937 --> 00:04:13,765 Shh, they're about to play the new sound! 122 00:04:16,346 --> 00:04:17,451 It's a crinkle. I solved it. 123 00:04:17,487 --> 00:04:20,208 Yes, but you have to know what object is making the crinkle. 124 00:04:20,244 --> 00:04:21,686 But that's impossible. It could be anything. 125 00:04:21,729 --> 00:04:23,168 Yes, sir. That's the game. 126 00:04:23,204 --> 00:04:24,210 It's a bag of potato chips. 127 00:04:24,253 --> 00:04:25,298 Don't be an idiot! 128 00:04:25,341 --> 00:04:26,647 It's a bag of corn chips. 129 00:04:26,691 --> 00:04:27,996 Well, this is a total waste of time. 130 00:04:28,040 --> 00:04:29,824 Sure, but you can still have fun, 131 00:04:29,868 --> 00:04:31,609 - even if you're wasting time. - That's absurd. 132 00:04:31,652 --> 00:04:33,567 Productivity is what makes things fun. 133 00:04:33,611 --> 00:04:34,853 That's why humans go to work. 134 00:04:36,222 --> 00:04:37,440 It is? 135 00:04:37,484 --> 00:04:38,920 Hey. So you know 136 00:04:38,964 --> 00:04:40,400 how Alicia and I broke up because she moved to London, 137 00:04:40,443 --> 00:04:41,836 then we tried to make it work, 138 00:04:41,872 --> 00:04:43,074 but the distance was too much and we broke up again? 139 00:04:43,110 --> 00:04:45,364 No. The last thing you told me about yourself was that you were bi. 140 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:46,749 Well, a lot has happened since then. 141 00:04:46,785 --> 00:04:48,119 Anyway, I'm dating two other people. 142 00:04:48,155 --> 00:04:50,758 So much juice at one time. I'm drowning. 143 00:04:50,802 --> 00:04:52,847 Oh, gross. Charles, this is why I don't tell you anything. 144 00:04:52,891 --> 00:04:54,088 - I take it back. - Okay. 145 00:04:54,124 --> 00:04:55,676 Well, it's early stages, but they both tagged me 146 00:04:55,720 --> 00:04:58,287 in a bunch of photos online, and they found out about each other. 147 00:04:58,331 --> 00:04:59,502 - Yikes. - Yeah, I know. 148 00:04:59,538 --> 00:05:01,377 I shouldn't 'gram so much, but my brunch friends say 149 00:05:01,421 --> 00:05:02,770 it's the only way to promote my handmade jewelry line. 150 00:05:02,814 --> 00:05:03,739 Brunch? What? 151 00:05:03,775 --> 00:05:05,894 - Homemade... who... - Charles, focus. 152 00:05:05,930 --> 00:05:08,237 Anyway, they're both annoyed, and now I have to choose one of them, 153 00:05:08,471 --> 00:05:09,864 and I cannot make up my mind. 154 00:05:09,908 --> 00:05:12,142 It's insane. I never have trouble making decisions. 155 00:05:12,911 --> 00:05:14,342 Ugh. Choose the daughter. 156 00:05:14,652 --> 00:05:16,175 I always know exactly what to do, 157 00:05:16,218 --> 00:05:18,300 but for the first time in my life, I am stumped. 158 00:05:18,336 --> 00:05:20,294 Rosa, you've come to the right man. 159 00:05:20,330 --> 00:05:22,007 Boyles are genetically indecisive beings. 160 00:05:22,050 --> 00:05:23,835 So I chose the worst possible person to help me? 161 00:05:23,878 --> 00:05:25,314 No. We've developed 162 00:05:25,358 --> 00:05:27,055 a foolproof system to help us make choices. 163 00:05:27,099 --> 00:05:28,972 It used to take me so long to decide what to wear 164 00:05:29,008 --> 00:05:30,624 that I'd never change my clothes. 165 00:05:30,668 --> 00:05:31,985 Now look what I have on. 166 00:05:32,464 --> 00:05:34,316 Is this different than what you were wearing yesterday? 167 00:05:34,454 --> 00:05:35,526 Barely. 168 00:05:35,673 --> 00:05:37,718 Wow, your life sounds amazing. 169 00:05:37,762 --> 00:05:39,328 I'm really happy it worked out for you, 170 00:05:39,372 --> 00:05:41,592 you know, especially with the whole Tattler thing. 171 00:05:41,635 --> 00:05:44,029 What? The Tattler? Wow. 172 00:05:44,072 --> 00:05:45,639 I haven't heard that in a long time. 173 00:05:45,683 --> 00:05:46,853 Who even was the Tattler? 174 00:05:46,889 --> 00:05:48,281 You. That's why I'm bringing it up. 175 00:05:48,317 --> 00:05:50,817 Oh, right, I remember now that I was misidentified as the Tattler. 176 00:05:50,853 --> 00:05:52,610 That's so funny. But I wasn't the Tattler, 177 00:05:52,646 --> 00:05:53,675 so I'm pretty sure you got this wrong. 178 00:05:53,711 --> 00:05:55,657 No, no, no, I think I go... Hey, Eric. 179 00:05:55,801 --> 00:05:57,733 Didn't people call Jake the Tattler? 180 00:05:58,086 --> 00:05:59,087 Oh, yeah! 181 00:06:00,436 --> 00:06:02,264 Oh, good, more people are getting involved. 182 00:06:02,308 --> 00:06:04,789 After my initial design, they said it couldn't be done. 183 00:06:04,832 --> 00:06:06,617 They said it was too tall, too flashy... 184 00:06:06,660 --> 00:06:08,314 building codes, bureaucracy. 185 00:06:08,357 --> 00:06:11,447 Cut to the Freedom Tower as you see it today. 186 00:06:11,491 --> 00:06:12,623 Wow. 187 00:06:12,666 --> 00:06:14,483 Thank you. Yeah, I agree. 188 00:06:14,519 --> 00:06:15,974 Look, nobody cares about that stuff. 189 00:06:16,017 --> 00:06:17,453 We're all adults now. 190 00:06:17,497 --> 00:06:19,499 You're a cop. I work at a coffin factory. 191 00:06:19,542 --> 00:06:21,762 I'm not sitting around, thinking about how you tattled. 192 00:06:21,806 --> 00:06:23,451 Yes, we all have jobs and work on coffins. 193 00:06:23,487 --> 00:06:25,679 I didn't tattle, but whatevs. We don't have to keep talking about it. 194 00:06:25,723 --> 00:06:27,999 Great. 195 00:06:28,742 --> 00:06:29,933 But you were the Tattler, right? 196 00:06:29,969 --> 00:06:31,076 Brandon Bliss was my friend! 197 00:06:31,119 --> 00:06:32,686 Why would I tattle on my friend? 198 00:06:32,730 --> 00:06:34,688 The nickname was inaccurate, is all I'm saying. 199 00:06:34,732 --> 00:06:35,950 Anyways, as you can tell, 200 00:06:35,994 --> 00:06:37,604 I am totally over it. 201 00:06:37,648 --> 00:06:39,277 Ah, man, it's the Tattler. 202 00:06:39,313 --> 00:06:40,476 I didn't tattle! 203 00:06:41,652 --> 00:06:42,667 So... 204 00:06:42,870 --> 00:06:44,165 I think I might not be over it. 205 00:06:46,864 --> 00:06:48,474 Ugh, this is so unfair. 206 00:06:48,518 --> 00:06:49,780 Everyone remembers me as the Tattler, 207 00:06:49,823 --> 00:06:51,303 but somehow, no one remembers 208 00:06:51,347 --> 00:06:52,783 that Darren "Doo Doo" Donaldson 209 00:06:52,826 --> 00:06:54,263 crapped himself during PE. 210 00:06:54,306 --> 00:06:55,394 Look at him out there, 211 00:06:55,438 --> 00:06:56,743 dancing on the dance floor 212 00:06:56,787 --> 00:06:58,484 like he's lived a doo doo-free life. 213 00:06:58,528 --> 00:07:00,008 Jake, this isn't so bad. 214 00:07:00,051 --> 00:07:02,251 History is full of great tattlers. 215 00:07:02,287 --> 00:07:04,316 Martin Luther King tattled on racists. 216 00:07:04,360 --> 00:07:06,797 That's a pretty undercutting way of describing his accomplishments. 217 00:07:06,840 --> 00:07:08,494 I was trying to help. It felt bad. 218 00:07:08,538 --> 00:07:09,887 It's not even the nickname that bothers me. 219 00:07:09,931 --> 00:07:11,193 It's that I'm being wrongfully accused. 220 00:07:11,236 --> 00:07:12,977 I didn't tattle. I mean, if it was the truth, 221 00:07:13,021 --> 00:07:14,892 go ahead and call me the Tattler all day long. 222 00:07:14,936 --> 00:07:17,190 - Hey, Tattler. - Not cool, Jason! 223 00:07:17,677 --> 00:07:19,114 Let's just go home. 224 00:07:19,157 --> 00:07:20,680 No! We're not going anywhere. 225 00:07:20,724 --> 00:07:22,856 You were wrongfully accused. We're cops. 226 00:07:22,900 --> 00:07:24,684 Let's just find the real Tattler 227 00:07:24,728 --> 00:07:25,990 and prove your innocence. 228 00:07:26,034 --> 00:07:26,991 Yes! I love it! 229 00:07:27,035 --> 00:07:29,515 Why learn to grow when you can fix the past? 230 00:07:29,559 --> 00:07:31,300 This is exactly why I don't need therapy. 231 00:07:31,343 --> 00:07:33,413 Not sure that's the lesson I want you to take away from this. 232 00:07:33,449 --> 00:07:35,022 Too late! We're gonna prove I wasn't the Tattler. 233 00:07:35,058 --> 00:07:36,581 Therapy is a scam. Let's do this. 234 00:07:38,176 --> 00:07:39,177 No. 235 00:07:39,221 --> 00:07:41,005 The sound was more of a "khh." 236 00:07:41,049 --> 00:07:42,528 Ooh, how goes the crinkle hunt? 237 00:07:42,572 --> 00:07:44,400 I see you're not just wasting time. 238 00:07:44,443 --> 00:07:46,402 You're also wasting tin. 239 00:07:46,445 --> 00:07:47,651 It was only one piece. 240 00:07:49,126 --> 00:07:51,372 Okay, it was a ton of tin. 241 00:07:51,408 --> 00:07:52,886 Pretty sure it's a guy eating a sandwich. 242 00:07:53,265 --> 00:07:54,370 I'll prove it to you. 243 00:07:54,406 --> 00:07:56,064 I'm not buying you any more sandwiches, Scully. 244 00:07:56,107 --> 00:07:58,588 - I'm doing this for us! - Guys, we can't fight. 245 00:07:58,631 --> 00:08:00,155 That's what the Horndog wants. 246 00:08:00,198 --> 00:08:02,722 We're getting close. We just need to keep testing more things. 247 00:08:02,766 --> 00:08:04,681 Oh, that's a good idea. 248 00:08:04,724 --> 00:08:06,621 Have you tried a piece of paper? 249 00:08:08,163 --> 00:08:09,120 Is that your crinkle? 250 00:08:09,164 --> 00:08:10,861 Ooh, maybe... oh. 251 00:08:11,192 --> 00:08:13,690 Maybe it's these bags of coffee beans. 252 00:08:13,733 --> 00:08:15,692 All right, sir. I think you've made your point. 253 00:08:15,735 --> 00:08:18,365 My point? Oh, I'm just trying to have fun by wasting time. 254 00:08:18,956 --> 00:08:21,698 Oh, maybe it's this crinkly-crunkly yogurt. 255 00:08:24,490 --> 00:08:25,752 Terry heard a crinkle. 256 00:08:25,788 --> 00:08:27,225 Holt heard a crinkle, too. 257 00:08:27,261 --> 00:08:29,045 So suddenly, it's not a waste of time? 258 00:08:29,081 --> 00:08:30,738 Not a waste of time if we win! 259 00:08:31,417 --> 00:08:32,750 What are you waiting for, Jeffords? 260 00:08:33,188 --> 00:08:34,692 Call the Horndog! 261 00:08:34,928 --> 00:08:36,495 So then I said to Steve, 262 00:08:36,539 --> 00:08:38,584 "What if we drop the '-lications,' 263 00:08:38,628 --> 00:08:40,195 just call them 'apps'?" 264 00:08:40,238 --> 00:08:41,404 That's incredible. 265 00:08:42,110 --> 00:08:44,025 - Do you miss him? - Oh, every day, Laura. 266 00:08:44,068 --> 00:08:46,223 - Every day. - You should talk to Quentin Chase. 267 00:08:46,259 --> 00:08:48,203 He's a big-time Silicon Valley investor now, 268 00:08:48,246 --> 00:08:49,465 and he was just telling me all about it. 269 00:08:49,508 --> 00:08:50,596 Quentin, come here. 270 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:52,033 You have got to talk to Gina. 271 00:08:52,076 --> 00:08:53,817 She basically invented apps. 272 00:08:53,860 --> 00:08:55,558 They were going to be called "lications." 273 00:08:55,601 --> 00:08:56,776 You really bungled that. 274 00:08:56,820 --> 00:08:57,995 What you been working on? 275 00:08:58,039 --> 00:08:59,736 Currently, I have been working 276 00:08:59,779 --> 00:09:02,270 on an app called Toddler. 277 00:09:02,306 --> 00:09:04,393 It's like Tinder, but for toddlers. 278 00:09:04,436 --> 00:09:05,742 Tinder for toddlers. 279 00:09:05,785 --> 00:09:07,396 I like it. How are you gonna spell that? 280 00:09:07,439 --> 00:09:08,571 How many D's? 281 00:09:08,614 --> 00:09:10,573 Five. 282 00:09:11,072 --> 00:09:12,966 All right, we should start by talking to Brandon Bliss 283 00:09:13,010 --> 00:09:14,925 and find out who told him you were the Tattler. 284 00:09:14,968 --> 00:09:16,405 Unfortunately, Bliss is not here. 285 00:09:16,448 --> 00:09:19,016 Probably in the VIP section at a Fatboy Slim concert. 286 00:09:19,060 --> 00:09:20,931 Would that be cool for a 37-year-old? 287 00:09:20,974 --> 00:09:22,585 The funk soul brother is timeless, Ames. 288 00:09:22,628 --> 00:09:24,761 All right, I don't know who told Brandon, 289 00:09:24,804 --> 00:09:26,284 but I heard it was someone on the football team. 290 00:09:26,328 --> 00:09:28,199 Okay, well, we need more information than that, 291 00:09:28,243 --> 00:09:30,158 so take me back to the day. Spare no details. 292 00:09:30,201 --> 00:09:31,463 Okay, I saw Brandon 293 00:09:31,507 --> 00:09:33,117 after second period, and everything seemed tight. 294 00:09:33,161 --> 00:09:34,945 - _ - ? Hey now, you're an all-star ? 295 00:09:34,988 --> 00:09:37,121 ? Get your game on go play ? 296 00:09:37,165 --> 00:09:38,905 But then, when I saw him after third period... 297 00:09:38,949 --> 00:09:40,907 - _ - something had clearly changed. 298 00:09:40,951 --> 00:09:42,474 ? Get paid ? 299 00:09:42,518 --> 00:09:44,476 ? All that glitters is gold ? 300 00:09:44,520 --> 00:09:46,087 After that, there was 301 00:09:46,130 --> 00:09:47,740 little color left in the world for young Jake. 302 00:09:47,784 --> 00:09:51,396 My earring, less gold, my JNCO jeans less purple. 303 00:09:51,440 --> 00:09:53,268 Are you sure you were becoming cool? 304 00:09:53,311 --> 00:09:54,312 Yeah. Why? 305 00:09:54,356 --> 00:09:55,792 I know how to solve this. 306 00:09:55,835 --> 00:09:57,054 We just have to find out which football player 307 00:09:57,098 --> 00:09:58,534 had third period with Brandon Bliss. 308 00:09:58,577 --> 00:09:59,839 We need his class schedule. 309 00:09:59,883 --> 00:10:01,145 Yeah, but where are we gonna find that? 310 00:10:01,189 --> 00:10:02,973 In the coolest room in the school. 311 00:10:05,541 --> 00:10:06,977 Good lord! 312 00:10:07,020 --> 00:10:08,413 You coulda just picked the lock. 313 00:10:08,457 --> 00:10:09,632 I know. I'm sorry. 314 00:10:09,675 --> 00:10:11,503 I'm just so amped up about Admin. 315 00:10:11,886 --> 00:10:14,637 Okay, this is the Boyle decision-making manual. 316 00:10:14,680 --> 00:10:16,117 One of these sections will help you 317 00:10:16,160 --> 00:10:17,596 with choosing your partner. 318 00:10:17,640 --> 00:10:20,425 Here we go. What do you prefer, eyes or butt, brains or body? 319 00:10:20,469 --> 00:10:21,478 - Brains. - Uh... 320 00:10:21,514 --> 00:10:22,993 Sorry, no, that's for deciding lunch. 321 00:10:23,036 --> 00:10:25,300 - Horrifying. - Oh, I found the romance section. 322 00:10:25,343 --> 00:10:27,084 Now, first, I will need the names 323 00:10:27,128 --> 00:10:28,999 of the two people you're choosing between. 324 00:10:29,042 --> 00:10:30,783 I will not be telling you any information about them. 325 00:10:30,827 --> 00:10:32,367 No problem. We can work with that. 326 00:10:32,403 --> 00:10:34,004 I will just call them by their initials. 327 00:10:34,047 --> 00:10:35,266 - No. - I will call them 328 00:10:35,310 --> 00:10:36,240 - "Couscous" and "Quinoa." - Whatever. 329 00:10:36,276 --> 00:10:37,476 Okay, now, for this to work right, 330 00:10:37,512 --> 00:10:39,429 you need to answer these questions without thinking. 331 00:10:39,784 --> 00:10:40,999 - Who makes you laugh more? - Quinoa. 332 00:10:41,035 --> 00:10:42,134 - Who has softer lips? - Couscous. 333 00:10:42,170 --> 00:10:43,365 A new Cirque du Soleil's in town. 334 00:10:43,401 --> 00:10:44,611 You have the two best seats in the house. 335 00:10:44,647 --> 00:10:46,508 - Who are you bringing? - Is this a reward or a punishment? 336 00:10:46,544 --> 00:10:47,418 - You decide. - Quinoa. 337 00:10:47,454 --> 00:10:49,247 Great. Next question: You die and become a ghost. 338 00:10:49,283 --> 00:10:51,624 The rules of the afterlife are that of the movie "Casper." 339 00:10:51,660 --> 00:10:52,670 Whose house would you rather haunt? 340 00:10:52,706 --> 00:10:54,128 How many more of these questions are there? 341 00:10:54,164 --> 00:10:55,426 309. 342 00:10:55,849 --> 00:10:57,877 - Okay, I've got something. - Oh. 343 00:10:57,913 --> 00:10:59,386 That's not Brandon's profile. It's mine. 344 00:10:59,422 --> 00:11:01,348 I just want a quick peek at your attendance record. 345 00:11:01,553 --> 00:11:02,641 Zero absences. 346 00:11:02,685 --> 00:11:04,861 Oh, mama... 347 00:11:04,904 --> 00:11:06,036 Printing this for later. 348 00:11:06,079 --> 00:11:07,646 Keep it in your pants, Santiago. 349 00:11:07,690 --> 00:11:09,474 Oh, that's exactly where it's going. 350 00:11:11,084 --> 00:11:13,043 Okay, here's Brandon's info. 351 00:11:13,086 --> 00:11:14,523 Third period, first semester... 352 00:11:14,566 --> 00:11:16,220 Any of these people on the football team? 353 00:11:16,264 --> 00:11:18,788 Scott Alford, Taylor Black... wow, Tom Brady? 354 00:11:18,831 --> 00:11:20,616 Different Tom Brady. He was in theater. 355 00:11:20,659 --> 00:11:23,096 Although he was the MVP of that year's production of "Fiddler." 356 00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:24,588 - Hm. - Wait a minute. 357 00:11:24,624 --> 00:11:25,751 Danny Matthews. That's the guy. 358 00:11:25,795 --> 00:11:27,057 He was on the football team. 359 00:11:27,100 --> 00:11:28,319 That's the bastard who set me up. 360 00:11:28,363 --> 00:11:29,753 Yeah, and look at this. 361 00:11:30,365 --> 00:11:32,541 You did so much community service. 362 00:11:32,584 --> 00:11:34,238 Me like-y. 363 00:11:36,647 --> 00:11:38,649 Guys, you know how I thought it would be so much fun 364 00:11:38,685 --> 00:11:39,881 to lie to everyone tonight? 365 00:11:39,917 --> 00:11:40,908 Yeah. Did it finally catch up with you? 366 00:11:40,944 --> 00:11:43,680 No, the opposite. Someone wants to buy a company I made up on the spot. 367 00:11:43,716 --> 00:11:45,732 The elevator pitch had him drooling. 368 00:11:45,776 --> 00:11:47,517 As a mother, I'm always struggling 369 00:11:47,560 --> 00:11:48,997 to find quality playdates. 370 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:51,869 Most two-year-olds are boring, lame duds. 371 00:11:51,913 --> 00:11:53,697 All of my daughter's friends suck. 372 00:11:53,740 --> 00:11:56,265 Well, with Todddddler's proprietary algorithm, 373 00:11:56,308 --> 00:11:58,920 you will be matched with top tots, 374 00:11:58,963 --> 00:12:00,095 and those boring duds... 375 00:12:00,138 --> 00:12:01,531 they'll stay where they belong: 376 00:12:01,574 --> 00:12:04,079 the hell away from you and your family. 377 00:12:05,230 --> 00:12:07,363 I'm not really sure how to close this. 378 00:12:07,406 --> 00:12:09,365 Maybe you guys could pretend to be heirs 379 00:12:09,408 --> 00:12:12,934 to a canned-goods fortune who want to buy my company! 380 00:12:12,977 --> 00:12:14,587 Gina, we don't have time for your thing right now. 381 00:12:14,631 --> 00:12:16,415 Oh, smart. Big-time him. 382 00:12:16,459 --> 00:12:17,808 That's the perfect idea. 383 00:12:17,851 --> 00:12:19,157 I won't forget you when I'm rich. 384 00:12:19,201 --> 00:12:20,854 Thanks so much, Jake and Jake's wife. 385 00:12:20,898 --> 00:12:22,247 She knows your name. Oh, look! 386 00:12:22,291 --> 00:12:23,814 It's Danny Matthews! But he'll never talk 387 00:12:23,857 --> 00:12:25,163 with all these people around. 388 00:12:25,207 --> 00:12:26,773 Not a problem. Just be in the science lab 389 00:12:26,817 --> 00:12:28,427 in ten minutes. I'll get him alone. 390 00:12:28,471 --> 00:12:29,559 What are you gonna do? 391 00:12:29,602 --> 00:12:32,127 Let's just say I'm not above using my feminine wiles. 392 00:12:32,170 --> 00:12:33,737 Danny Matthews, I'm with the school. 393 00:12:33,780 --> 00:12:35,043 You need to follow me right now. 394 00:12:35,086 --> 00:12:37,146 - Is everything... - I said now, mister. 395 00:12:38,742 --> 00:12:40,004 I'm one caller away. 396 00:12:40,048 --> 00:12:41,310 I can't believe we figured it out. 397 00:12:41,353 --> 00:12:43,637 And I can't believe it took you this long. 398 00:12:43,673 --> 00:12:45,753 Yogurt is literally your one thing. 399 00:12:45,789 --> 00:12:47,536 - Okay, okay. - Well, I'm just saying. 400 00:12:47,572 --> 00:12:49,488 If the sound were eating damp rice, 401 00:12:49,524 --> 00:12:50,972 I would've gotten it immediately. 402 00:12:51,015 --> 00:12:52,364 Guys, they're taking another guess. 403 00:12:52,408 --> 00:12:54,062 All right, Brenda from Yonkers. 404 00:12:54,105 --> 00:12:55,977 It's time for you to name that sound. 405 00:12:56,020 --> 00:12:57,413 Hi. Quick shout-out 406 00:12:57,456 --> 00:12:59,241 to the nurses at United Pediatric. 407 00:12:59,284 --> 00:13:00,851 This money'll do those kids a lot of good. 408 00:13:00,894 --> 00:13:02,374 Cry me a river. Brenda from Yonkers. 409 00:13:02,418 --> 00:13:04,681 We've all had budget cuts. Just take your guess. 410 00:13:04,724 --> 00:13:05,987 Is it Styrofoam? 411 00:13:06,030 --> 00:13:07,553 Wrong! 412 00:13:07,597 --> 00:13:09,816 Oh, I can't believe she guessed Styrofoam. 413 00:13:09,860 --> 00:13:10,985 What a dumb nurse. 414 00:13:11,644 --> 00:13:13,472 Next caller, you're on with the Horndog. 415 00:13:13,516 --> 00:13:14,473 It's me! 416 00:13:14,517 --> 00:13:16,736 The sound is a yogurt 417 00:13:16,780 --> 00:13:18,042 being opened. 418 00:13:18,086 --> 00:13:21,089 That is... 419 00:13:21,132 --> 00:13:22,394 Wrong! 420 00:13:22,438 --> 00:13:23,613 What? No! 421 00:13:23,656 --> 00:13:25,615 You b-b-b-blew it! 422 00:13:25,658 --> 00:13:27,526 Damn you, Horndog. 423 00:13:27,747 --> 00:13:29,445 Okay, I have tabulated your responses, 424 00:13:29,488 --> 00:13:31,273 and the results are definitive. 425 00:13:31,316 --> 00:13:33,405 - Amazing. - It's a dead tie. 426 00:13:33,449 --> 00:13:34,885 This is dumb. I'm just gonna end it 427 00:13:34,928 --> 00:13:36,017 - with both of them. - Rosa, stop. 428 00:13:36,060 --> 00:13:37,426 There is one more method. 429 00:13:37,462 --> 00:13:39,107 Ancient Boyles believed 430 00:13:39,150 --> 00:13:41,848 that suspending yourself by your feet forces your blood 431 00:13:41,892 --> 00:13:43,589 to the decision center of your brain. 432 00:13:43,906 --> 00:13:47,637 We call this method the "Upside-Down Coward." 433 00:13:47,680 --> 00:13:49,291 You want me to hang from the ceiling like a bat? 434 00:13:49,334 --> 00:13:51,162 The bat is nature's most decisive animal. 435 00:13:51,206 --> 00:13:52,816 The creature that flails around frantically? 436 00:13:52,859 --> 00:13:54,035 Those are all micro-decisions. 437 00:13:54,078 --> 00:13:55,514 Now, let's get you strapped up. 438 00:13:56,559 --> 00:13:57,690 How do you feel? 439 00:13:57,734 --> 00:13:58,822 Nauseous. 440 00:13:58,865 --> 00:14:00,663 Good. It's working. 441 00:14:00,911 --> 00:14:02,086 - Q? - Yeah. 442 00:14:02,130 --> 00:14:03,087 Get off the phone. 443 00:14:03,131 --> 00:14:04,219 Now, I'm not sure 444 00:14:04,262 --> 00:14:05,655 how serious you were about funding, 445 00:14:05,698 --> 00:14:09,267 but I should tell you there's 103 other bidders. 446 00:14:09,311 --> 00:14:11,356 Oof, I am not a fan of getting into bidding wars. 447 00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:14,011 Then don't make an offer, 'cause I want babies on my app, 448 00:14:14,055 --> 00:14:15,839 but not in my boardroom. 449 00:14:15,882 --> 00:14:17,058 Oh, damn, Gina. 450 00:14:17,101 --> 00:14:18,711 Did you just "oh, damn" yourself? 451 00:14:18,755 --> 00:14:19,799 Someone had to. 452 00:14:19,843 --> 00:14:20,758 Okay. 453 00:14:22,232 --> 00:14:23,412 Let's talk numbers. 454 00:14:23,455 --> 00:14:25,283 Mr. Peralta, I believe you know Danny Matthews. 455 00:14:25,327 --> 00:14:27,068 Jake. Hey, what's going on, man? 456 00:14:27,111 --> 00:14:28,286 The answer to that question 457 00:14:28,330 --> 00:14:31,246 goes back to a brisk day in 1997, 458 00:14:31,606 --> 00:14:33,683 a day you told a lie. 459 00:14:33,726 --> 00:14:36,816 But the lying stops right now! 460 00:14:36,860 --> 00:14:38,383 Oh, no! 461 00:14:38,427 --> 00:14:40,081 You broke some poor kid's science project! 462 00:14:40,124 --> 00:14:41,187 We have to fix it. 463 00:14:41,223 --> 00:14:42,528 Kind of in the middle of something. 464 00:14:42,564 --> 00:14:44,955 Oh, you know what? Krebs cycle. I got this. 465 00:14:44,998 --> 00:14:46,783 Great. So, Danny, 466 00:14:46,826 --> 00:14:47,914 true or false? 467 00:14:47,958 --> 00:14:49,220 You were on the football team. 468 00:14:49,264 --> 00:14:50,961 - True? - And true or false: 469 00:14:51,004 --> 00:14:53,050 you had third period with Brandon Bliss. 470 00:14:53,094 --> 00:14:54,399 Mm, I honestly don't remember... 471 00:14:54,443 --> 00:14:55,792 It was true! We checked the records, 472 00:14:55,835 --> 00:14:57,272 and I have one more question. 473 00:14:57,315 --> 00:14:59,100 Ooh, Jake, can you get me that oxygen on the floor? 474 00:14:59,143 --> 00:15:00,325 - Little red guy. - What? 475 00:15:00,361 --> 00:15:01,894 Sorry. You know what? Yeah, I'll get it. 476 00:15:03,016 --> 00:15:04,192 Why did you tell Brandon Bliss 477 00:15:04,235 --> 00:15:05,671 that I was the Tattler? 478 00:15:05,715 --> 00:15:07,282 Because you were. I saw you talking to principal. 479 00:15:07,325 --> 00:15:08,544 I remember it, clear as day. 480 00:15:08,587 --> 00:15:10,111 Look, you couldn't have seen me, 481 00:15:10,154 --> 00:15:11,677 because I wasn't there. I didn't tattle. 482 00:15:11,721 --> 00:15:13,418 Man, it was you, okay? 483 00:15:13,462 --> 00:15:15,464 You had your long hair and your little earring, 484 00:15:15,507 --> 00:15:18,238 and the denim jacket you are literally wearing right now. 485 00:15:19,076 --> 00:15:20,243 Oh, no. 486 00:15:20,817 --> 00:15:21,916 It wasn't me, 487 00:15:23,118 --> 00:15:24,785 but it was the DDC. 488 00:15:24,995 --> 00:15:26,388 Gina. 489 00:15:26,431 --> 00:15:28,999 Jake, guess who just sold her app idea. 490 00:15:29,042 --> 00:15:30,174 Don't trust her. 491 00:15:30,218 --> 00:15:31,654 Everything she's told you is a lie. 492 00:15:31,697 --> 00:15:33,177 She made up the company and everything else. 493 00:15:33,221 --> 00:15:34,396 She's a liar. 494 00:15:34,439 --> 00:15:36,006 Jake, whatever strategy this is 495 00:15:36,049 --> 00:15:37,834 is not necessary. I already closed the deal. 496 00:15:37,877 --> 00:15:39,444 I know you were the Tattler. 497 00:15:43,304 --> 00:15:45,215 Amy, I'm ready to go. 498 00:15:45,251 --> 00:15:46,295 Yep, totally. 499 00:15:46,542 --> 00:15:47,847 I'm almost done with this project, 500 00:15:47,883 --> 00:15:49,319 but I don't need to finish it, 501 00:15:49,355 --> 00:15:50,487 because what matters 502 00:15:50,523 --> 00:15:52,481 is that you are going through something, 503 00:15:52,517 --> 00:15:55,540 and as your wife, and love of your life... 504 00:15:55,576 --> 00:15:57,230 Are you vamping so you can finish that? 505 00:15:57,273 --> 00:15:58,622 I only have two molecules left. 506 00:15:58,666 --> 00:16:00,842 - Come on, man. - Jake, we need to talk. 507 00:16:00,886 --> 00:16:02,539 Yeah, you guys do need to talk. 508 00:16:02,583 --> 00:16:05,325 That sounds excellent. Friendship, so much history... 509 00:16:05,368 --> 00:16:07,066 I'm just gonna get this out of your way. 510 00:16:07,109 --> 00:16:08,581 Oh, man. 511 00:16:09,407 --> 00:16:10,567 What the hell, Gina? 512 00:16:10,603 --> 00:16:12,375 You ruined my entire senior year. 513 00:16:12,419 --> 00:16:13,725 How could you do that to me? 514 00:16:13,768 --> 00:16:15,161 Jake, I was only trying to help. 515 00:16:15,204 --> 00:16:16,728 You were hanging out with those guys 516 00:16:16,771 --> 00:16:18,437 and getting close, and they weren't good people. 517 00:16:18,642 --> 00:16:20,557 Do you know why Brandon wasn't at the reunion tonight? 518 00:16:20,601 --> 00:16:21,994 I don't know. Probably 'cause he was shooting 519 00:16:22,037 --> 00:16:23,299 a beer commercial where the whole plot 520 00:16:23,343 --> 00:16:24,553 was that everyone wanted to sleep with him. 521 00:16:24,589 --> 00:16:26,302 No, 'cause he's on parole. 522 00:16:26,346 --> 00:16:28,391 He's not allowed to leave the state of Delaware. 523 00:16:28,435 --> 00:16:30,219 Oh, okay, so that's obviously a bummer, 524 00:16:30,263 --> 00:16:31,743 but I wasn't gonna end up like him. 525 00:16:31,786 --> 00:16:34,180 You were starting to. You wanted to steal a van with him, 526 00:16:34,223 --> 00:16:36,542 and I told you not to, and you weren't listening to me. 527 00:16:36,578 --> 00:16:38,575 I mean, what would've happened if you got caught? 528 00:16:38,736 --> 00:16:39,751 I don't know. 529 00:16:39,794 --> 00:16:41,567 You would never have become a cop. 530 00:16:41,603 --> 00:16:43,319 Yeah, I'm the reason you're a cop. 531 00:16:43,363 --> 00:16:44,930 I'm your origin story, dude. 532 00:16:44,973 --> 00:16:46,540 You can't be mad at me. 533 00:16:46,583 --> 00:16:48,107 I feel like I'm still pretty mad. 534 00:16:48,150 --> 00:16:49,935 Peter Parker wasn't mad at his spider. 535 00:16:49,978 --> 00:16:51,893 Yeah, but they weren't best friends before the bite, 536 00:16:51,937 --> 00:16:53,808 and it still doesn't explain how you let everyone think 537 00:16:53,852 --> 00:16:55,679 I was the Tattler for 20 years. 538 00:16:55,723 --> 00:16:57,681 Well, I didn't want to lose our friendship. 539 00:16:57,725 --> 00:16:58,987 I was being weak. 540 00:16:59,286 --> 00:17:00,454 I'm sorry. 541 00:17:01,453 --> 00:17:03,078 Okay. 542 00:17:03,122 --> 00:17:04,558 And if it makes you feel any better, 543 00:17:04,601 --> 00:17:06,821 that app thing completely blew up in my face. 544 00:17:06,865 --> 00:17:08,266 I mean, my night sucked. 545 00:17:08,823 --> 00:17:10,564 Okay, I can see from your expression 546 00:17:10,607 --> 00:17:12,218 that your night was worse, 547 00:17:12,261 --> 00:17:14,558 and I should've left it at "sorry." 548 00:17:14,916 --> 00:17:16,265 So did you hear? 549 00:17:16,309 --> 00:17:17,353 Someone guessed the sound. 550 00:17:17,397 --> 00:17:18,790 It was a bag of chips. 551 00:17:18,833 --> 00:17:20,095 Wow. So the lesson here 552 00:17:20,139 --> 00:17:21,749 is to listen to Hitchcock and Scully more? 553 00:17:21,793 --> 00:17:23,098 - No, that can't be possible. - Yeah, I don't think 554 00:17:23,142 --> 00:17:24,665 - we earned that today. - Agreed. 555 00:17:24,708 --> 00:17:26,449 Sorry for dragging you into that dumb game. 556 00:17:26,493 --> 00:17:28,669 You were right. It was a waste of time. 557 00:17:28,712 --> 00:17:29,791 No, it wasn't. 558 00:17:29,827 --> 00:17:32,099 Even though it was pointless, I did enjoy myself. 559 00:17:32,135 --> 00:17:33,892 I can't wait to go home and tell Kevin 560 00:17:33,935 --> 00:17:36,808 you can have fun without being productive. 561 00:17:36,851 --> 00:17:39,448 Hey, guys, they're about to play the new mystery sound. 562 00:17:39,898 --> 00:17:41,160 I can tell Kevin tomorrow. 563 00:17:41,203 --> 00:17:42,465 I'll bet Sharon's already asleep. 564 00:17:42,509 --> 00:17:44,163 And I've got no one in my life. 565 00:17:44,206 --> 00:17:46,379 Scully, play that damn noise. 566 00:17:47,106 --> 00:17:48,820 Quentin, can I talk to you for a minute? 567 00:17:48,863 --> 00:17:50,560 Are you here to give me a long speech 568 00:17:50,604 --> 00:17:52,127 about how you still deserve my money? 569 00:17:52,171 --> 00:17:53,172 No. 570 00:17:53,215 --> 00:17:54,390 I am. 571 00:17:54,434 --> 00:17:55,827 Very cool entrance. 572 00:17:55,870 --> 00:17:57,176 Thank you. Listen. 573 00:17:57,219 --> 00:17:59,091 Gina Linetti is not a perfect person. 574 00:17:59,134 --> 00:18:01,571 Mm, I'm hoping this gets more supportive as it goes along. 575 00:18:01,615 --> 00:18:02,964 But what she lacks in perfection, 576 00:18:03,008 --> 00:18:04,531 she makes up for 577 00:18:04,574 --> 00:18:06,228 with an utter and total belief that she is perfect. 578 00:18:06,272 --> 00:18:07,577 Ooh, you said "but," and then you said 579 00:18:07,621 --> 00:18:09,405 - something worse. - She is fiercely loyal. 580 00:18:09,951 --> 00:18:11,973 She will do the right thing for you 581 00:18:12,201 --> 00:18:13,893 even when you can't see it for yourself, 582 00:18:14,777 --> 00:18:17,239 and she's saved my ass countless times. 583 00:18:17,283 --> 00:18:18,501 And it's been 12. I counted. 584 00:18:18,545 --> 00:18:19,981 She came up with an idea on the spot 585 00:18:20,025 --> 00:18:21,461 that you were interested in. 586 00:18:21,504 --> 00:18:23,855 Imagine what she could do with time and resources. 587 00:18:23,898 --> 00:18:25,769 Do the world a favor. 588 00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:28,076 Invest in Gina Linetti. 589 00:18:31,950 --> 00:18:33,168 Hard pass. 590 00:18:33,212 --> 00:18:35,040 - What? - But my great speech. 591 00:18:35,083 --> 00:18:36,345 Yeah, the speech was great, 592 00:18:36,389 --> 00:18:39,044 but I've also been lying the whole night. 593 00:18:39,087 --> 00:18:40,480 I'm not a tech mogul. 594 00:18:40,523 --> 00:18:41,829 I came here to mess with people. 595 00:18:41,873 --> 00:18:43,700 - How dare you? - Speaking of which, 596 00:18:43,744 --> 00:18:45,659 did either one of you drive? 'Cause I could use a ride. 597 00:18:45,702 --> 00:18:47,922 - No, Quentin. - Oh, Quentin. 598 00:18:49,228 --> 00:18:50,446 Okay. 599 00:18:50,490 --> 00:18:51,752 Now open your eyes, 600 00:18:51,795 --> 00:18:54,015 and the person you are meant to be with 601 00:18:54,059 --> 00:18:55,950 should appear before you. 602 00:18:58,585 --> 00:19:00,239 Sorry. I was just watching. 603 00:19:00,282 --> 00:19:02,049 Get out of here, Hitchcock! 604 00:19:02,632 --> 00:19:04,591 - Ugh. - This isn't working. 605 00:19:04,634 --> 00:19:06,027 I'm no closer to making a decision. 606 00:19:06,071 --> 00:19:07,333 I'm jumping down. 607 00:19:07,376 --> 00:19:08,900 Well, you can't just jump down. 608 00:19:09,422 --> 00:19:11,337 - My goodness! - It's over. 609 00:19:11,380 --> 00:19:12,512 I'm gonna put 'em both in a group text 610 00:19:12,555 --> 00:19:13,643 - and say "peace out." - Uh, no! 611 00:19:13,687 --> 00:19:14,949 There's still more options. 612 00:19:14,993 --> 00:19:16,342 We haven't even done roleplay yet. 613 00:19:16,385 --> 00:19:17,509 What? 614 00:19:17,655 --> 00:19:18,787 Ugh. 615 00:19:18,823 --> 00:19:21,477 I took too long getting back to Quinoa and they got mad and ended it. 616 00:19:21,521 --> 00:19:23,044 And that's how it's done. 617 00:19:23,088 --> 00:19:24,717 - What are you talking about? - The process worked. 618 00:19:24,753 --> 00:19:26,395 Boyles don't make decisions. 619 00:19:26,439 --> 00:19:27,744 We delay our decisions 620 00:19:27,788 --> 00:19:29,442 until the universe makes them for us. 621 00:19:29,485 --> 00:19:31,618 That way, we never make a wrong choice. 622 00:19:31,661 --> 00:19:33,794 That is very sad, but also, I guess it worked. 623 00:19:33,837 --> 00:19:35,187 - Mm-hmm. - I do feel pretty good. 624 00:19:35,230 --> 00:19:36,884 Couscous is dope. She's funny. 625 00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:38,364 Couscous is a she! I knew it! 626 00:19:38,407 --> 00:19:40,366 - Did you? - No, and I still don't know. 627 00:19:40,409 --> 00:19:42,411 There's equal chance you called them "she" to throw me off. 628 00:19:42,455 --> 00:19:43,568 You get me, Boyle. 629 00:19:45,632 --> 00:19:48,809 So I think I figured out an awesome and dramatic way 630 00:19:48,852 --> 00:19:51,159 to reveal that I was the Tattler. 631 00:19:51,203 --> 00:19:52,944 It'll be a dance. There'll be costumes. 632 00:19:52,987 --> 00:19:55,424 Gina, it's fine. I don't care anymore. 633 00:19:55,468 --> 00:19:57,426 - It's all in the past. - Oh, thank God. 634 00:19:57,470 --> 00:19:58,950 That is such a relief, 635 00:19:58,993 --> 00:20:01,213 'cause I didn't want people thinking I was a tattler. 636 00:20:01,256 --> 00:20:03,128 Where's Amy? 637 00:20:03,171 --> 00:20:04,390 She is in the library, writing 638 00:20:04,433 --> 00:20:05,739 a book report on "Jane Eyre," 639 00:20:05,782 --> 00:20:08,263 and she told me "not to wait up." 640 00:20:08,307 --> 00:20:09,438 - Oy. - Yeah. 641 00:20:10,831 --> 00:20:12,485 Thanks for trying to help with Quentin. 642 00:20:12,528 --> 00:20:14,008 It's funny. Even though it wasn't real, 643 00:20:14,052 --> 00:20:16,878 it was so fun, imagining running my own company. 644 00:20:16,914 --> 00:20:18,133 So why don't your pursue it? 645 00:20:18,169 --> 00:20:20,449 I can't raise my kid and create an app 646 00:20:20,493 --> 00:20:22,060 and work at the Nine-Nine. It's too much. 647 00:20:22,103 --> 00:20:24,279 Well, then prepare for me to murder your parents 648 00:20:24,323 --> 00:20:25,367 right in front of your face. 649 00:20:25,411 --> 00:20:26,586 - Rude. - No. 650 00:20:26,629 --> 00:20:28,153 It's Batman's origin story, 651 00:20:28,196 --> 00:20:30,068 like the radioactive spider thing you did with me. 652 00:20:30,111 --> 00:20:31,634 I don't read comic books. 653 00:20:32,940 --> 00:20:34,376 You helped me become who I am, 654 00:20:34,420 --> 00:20:36,074 so now I'm gonna return the favor. 655 00:20:38,032 --> 00:20:39,016 Gina... 656 00:20:39,816 --> 00:20:41,731 I think your talents might be wasted at the Nine-Nine. 657 00:20:42,166 --> 00:20:44,473 I love you, but it might be time for you to move on. 658 00:20:44,517 --> 00:20:46,127 Um, are you firing me? 659 00:20:46,171 --> 00:20:48,129 What? No. I don't think I could even do that. 660 00:20:48,173 --> 00:20:49,435 Good, because I quit. 661 00:20:49,478 --> 00:20:50,914 You know, tonight I realized 662 00:20:50,958 --> 00:20:52,307 that my talents 663 00:20:52,351 --> 00:20:53,830 are being wasted at the Nine-Nine. 664 00:20:53,874 --> 00:20:55,745 Okay, that's kind of exactly what I just said. 665 00:20:55,789 --> 00:20:58,166 Jake, let me finish. This is serious. 666 00:20:59,272 --> 00:21:00,835 It's time for me to move on. 667 00:21:01,099 --> 00:21:02,727 For real, though, it is. 668 00:21:03,101 --> 00:21:04,058 Really? 669 00:21:08,296 --> 00:21:10,064 Okay. 670 00:21:10,293 --> 00:21:11,537 Proud of you. 671 00:21:11,761 --> 00:21:12,893 Thank you. 672 00:21:12,936 --> 00:21:14,155 I'm proud of me, too. 673 00:21:15,527 --> 00:21:16,659 Guys! 674 00:21:17,028 --> 00:21:18,290 Vice principal caught me in the library. 675 00:21:18,333 --> 00:21:19,365 Let's roll! 676 00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:25,040 Sync & corrections by emeline-whovian www.addic7ed.com 49369

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