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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:12,262 --> 00:00:14,014 NOT AGAIN. 2 00:00:14,055 --> 00:00:16,808 BOW DOWN BEFORE RECYCLOPS. 3 00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:18,184 FIVE YEARS AGO, CORPORATE SAID 4 00:00:18,226 --> 00:00:20,103 WE HAD TO START A RECYCLING PROGRAM FOR EARTH DAY. 5 00:00:20,145 --> 00:00:21,896 SO DWIGHT TOOK THE LEAD ON THAT 6 00:00:21,938 --> 00:00:24,315 AND INTRODUCED US TO A VERY CLOSE FRIEND OF HIS 7 00:00:24,357 --> 00:00:25,984 NAMED RECYCLOPS. 8 00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:28,862 HAPPY EARTH DAY, EVERYONE, I'M RECYCLOPS. 9 00:00:28,903 --> 00:00:30,363 DID YOU KNOW THAT AN OLD MILK CARTON 10 00:00:30,405 --> 00:00:32,782 CAN BE SAWED IN HALF AND USED AS A PLANTER? 11 00:00:32,824 --> 00:00:36,494 THE NEXT YEAR HE REALLY STEPPED THINGS UP. 12 00:00:36,536 --> 00:00:41,082 WHO HAS PUT A NUMBER SEVEN PLASTIC IN A NUMBER FOUR BIN? 13 00:00:41,124 --> 00:00:46,212 A YEAR AFTER THAT, RECYCLOPS REALLY BEGAN TO TAKE SHAPE. 14 00:00:46,254 --> 00:00:51,593 RECYCLOPS WILL DROWN YOU IN YOUR OVERWATERED LAWNS. 15 00:00:51,634 --> 00:00:54,929 THEN TRAGEDY STRUCK RECYCLOPS WHEN HIS FICTIONAL PLANET 16 00:00:54,971 --> 00:00:56,890 WAS ATTACKED BY SOME OTHER FICTITIOUS THING. 17 00:00:56,931 --> 00:00:58,099 I CAN'T REMEMBER. 18 00:00:58,141 --> 00:01:01,978 RECYCLOPS WILL HAVE HIS REVENGE. 19 00:01:02,020 --> 00:01:03,605 I THINK THIS WAS ALSO THE YEAR THAT HE RENOUNCED 20 00:01:03,646 --> 00:01:07,525 EARTH DAY AND VOWED TO DESTROY THE PLANET HE ONCE LOVED. 21 00:01:07,567 --> 00:01:09,903 OH, MY GOD, YOU GUYS, LOOK, IT'S RECYCLOPS! 22 00:01:09,944 --> 00:01:13,198 RECYCLOPS DESTROYS! 23 00:01:13,239 --> 00:01:17,118 [growling] 24 00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:19,120 OH, IS TODAY RECYCLOPS DAY? 25 00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:20,580 YES. 26 00:01:20,622 --> 00:01:21,539 I THOUGHT YOU WERE KILLED BY POLLUTICORN OR SOMETHING. 27 00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:23,708 OH, POLLUTICORN WISHES. 28 00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:25,669 THAT'S AEROSOL SPRAY. 29 00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:27,045 IT'S TERRIBLE FOR THE ENVIRONMENT. 30 00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:29,130 HUMANS ARE TERRIBLE FOR THE ENVIRONMENT. 31 00:01:29,172 --> 00:01:32,217 [growling] 32 00:01:32,258 --> 00:01:34,219 THE THING I LIKE MOST ABOUT RECYCLOPS 33 00:01:34,260 --> 00:01:37,931 IS THAT HE'S CREATING A DIFFERENT WORLD FOR OUR CHILD. 34 00:01:37,972 --> 00:01:41,101 A WORLD WHERE YOU TRULY CAN BE ANYTHING YOU WANT. 35 00:01:41,142 --> 00:01:44,854 GOD BLESS YOU, RECYCLOPS AND YOUR COLD ROBOT HEART. 36 00:01:46,731 --> 00:01:49,693 [cheerful music] 37 00:01:49,734 --> 00:01:56,783 {\an8}♪ ♪ 38 00:02:18,888 --> 00:02:20,807 {\an8}OKAY, OKAY, HOW ABOUT THIS? 39 00:02:22,392 --> 00:02:23,435 {\an8}THAT'S GREAT. 40 00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:24,936 {\an8}I WANT IT TO BE BETTER THAN GREAT, PAM. 41 00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:26,813 {\an8}HOW ABOUT I REMAIN SEATED 42 00:02:26,855 --> 00:02:28,732 {\an8}AND I JUST DO A LITTLE BIT OF A NOD. 43 00:02:28,773 --> 00:02:30,608 {\an8}- SORT OF A HUMBLE THING. - SURE. 44 00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:33,069 {\an8}NO, THEN MY FACE IS DOWN AND THEY CAN'T SEE MY FACE. 45 00:02:33,111 --> 00:02:34,279 {\an8}AND IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE TAKING A DUMP. 46 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:38,199 {\an8}ALAN BRAND IS THE CEO OF THE COMPANY, 47 00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:42,871 {\an8}IF TITLE'S IMPORTANT TO YOU, HAS PERSONALLY INVITED MOI 48 00:02:42,912 --> 00:02:46,124 {\an8}TO GO TO NEW YORK TO THE SHAREHOLDER'S MEETING 49 00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:48,543 {\an8}AND SIT UP ON THE STAGE WITH THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS. 50 00:02:48,585 --> 00:02:51,379 {\an8}AND AT SOME POINT THEY ARE GOING TO INTRODUCE ME 51 00:02:51,421 --> 00:02:56,134 {\an8}AS THE MOST SUCCESSFUL BRANCH MANAGER THAT THEY HAVE. 52 00:02:56,176 --> 00:03:00,638 {\an8}AND THEN MICHAEL SCOTT TURNS AND WAVES TO THE CROWD 53 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:02,807 {\an8}AND THE CROWD GOES WILD. 54 00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:06,436 {\an8}LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, FROM SCRANTON PENNSYLVANIA, 55 00:03:06,478 --> 00:03:10,565 {\an8}PLEASE WELCOME MICHAEL "THE MACHINE" SCOTT. 56 00:03:14,694 --> 00:03:15,862 {\an8}DON'T DO THE TWIRL. 57 00:03:15,904 --> 00:03:16,988 {\an8}- LOSE THE TWIRL. - TWIRL SUCKS. 58 00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,490 {\an8}MICHAEL, I HATED THE TWIRL. 59 00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:20,075 {\an8}HATE THE TWIRL. 60 00:03:20,116 --> 00:03:22,077 {\an8}OKAY, OBVIOUSLY, I'M NOT GOING TO DO THE TWIRL. 61 00:03:22,118 --> 00:03:23,995 {\an8}I ONLY DID IT BECAUSE I NAILED THE WAVE. 62 00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:25,372 {\an8}YEAH, GOOD, DON'T DO IT. 63 00:03:25,413 --> 00:03:28,333 {\an8}I'M NOT GOING TO DO THE TWIRL. 64 00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:29,834 {\an8}ALL RIGHT? 65 00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:33,672 {\an8}IT'S NOT EVEN A TWIRL, IT'S A SPIN. 66 00:03:33,713 --> 00:03:35,590 {\an8}I MIGHT DO THE SPIN. 67 00:03:35,632 --> 00:03:37,717 {\an8}THE LONG TERM PROBLEM IS BAD INVESTMENTS 68 00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:39,469 {\an8}THAT THEY NEED TO DUMP. 69 00:03:39,511 --> 00:03:41,680 {\an8}THE SHORT TERM PROBLEM IS THE COMPANY HAS NO CASH 70 00:03:41,721 --> 00:03:43,056 {\an8}AND THERE'S NOWHERE TO GET IT. 71 00:03:43,098 --> 00:03:44,974 {\an8}OKAY, OSCAR, I DON'T NEED THE WHOLE ENCHILADA. 72 00:03:45,016 --> 00:03:46,059 {\an8}JUST BULLET POINTS. 73 00:03:46,101 --> 00:03:47,227 {\an8}THOSE ARE THE BULLET POINTS. 74 00:03:47,268 --> 00:03:48,478 {\an8}WELL, COULD YOU CONDENSE IT, PLEASE? 75 00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:50,021 {\an8}THAT'S AS SIMPLE AS I CAN MAKE IT. 76 00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:51,439 {\an8}MICHAEL, THE LIMO'S HERE FOR YOU. 77 00:03:51,481 --> 00:03:53,108 {\an8}IT'S NOT A LIMO. IT'S A TOWN CAR. 78 00:03:53,149 --> 00:03:54,359 {\an8}TOWN CAR'S ARE ACTUALLY BETTER, THOUGH. 79 00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:56,319 {\an8}BETTER TORQUE, BETTER HANDLING. 80 00:03:56,361 --> 00:03:57,612 {\an8}HE SAID LIMOUSINE, SO... 81 00:03:57,654 --> 00:03:58,905 {\an8}CHECK IT OUT, GUYS. 82 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:00,907 {\an8}THERE'S A LIMO DOWN HERE. 83 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,207 {\an8}MICHAEL, LOOK. 84 00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:13,169 {\an8}OH, MAN. 85 00:04:13,211 --> 00:04:14,629 {\an8}THEY SENT A LIMO. 86 00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:16,006 {\an8}TOWN CARS SUCK. 87 00:04:16,047 --> 00:04:18,174 {\an8}A TOWN CAR IS SOMETHING THAT A COMPANY SENDS 88 00:04:18,216 --> 00:04:19,384 {\an8}WHEN THEY'RE IN TROUBLE. 89 00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:22,303 A LIMOUSINE IS SOMETHING THAT A COMPANY SENDS 90 00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:25,724 WHEN THEY HAVE CAUSE FOR CELEBRATION. 91 00:04:25,765 --> 00:04:29,936 AND IN THIS CASE, I THINK WE ARE CELEBRATING ME. 92 00:04:34,190 --> 00:04:36,192 OH, WAIT! WAIT! 93 00:04:36,234 --> 00:04:38,111 WOW! WOW! 94 00:04:38,153 --> 00:04:40,030 - OH, NO WAY. - LOOK AT THAT. 95 00:04:42,615 --> 00:04:44,743 WHAT KIND OF MILEAGE DOES THIS BABY GET? 96 00:04:44,784 --> 00:04:47,579 IT'S LIKE WHAT HIGH SCHOOL KIDS TAKE TO PROM ON TV SHOWS. 97 00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,164 THIS IS SO TYPICAL OF MANAGEMENT 98 00:04:49,205 --> 00:04:50,331 TO SPEND MONEY ON THIS. 99 00:04:50,373 --> 00:04:52,250 UH, THEY'RE A BUNCH OF BOOBS. 100 00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:53,626 HATE TO BREAK IT TO YOU, OSCAR, 101 00:04:53,668 --> 00:04:54,878 BUT SOME OF US LIKE BOOBS. 102 00:04:54,919 --> 00:04:56,838 CALVES, CALVES ALL THE WAY. 103 00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:58,131 I'M SO JEALOUS RIGHT NOW. 104 00:04:58,173 --> 00:05:00,967 HEY, YOU KNOW WHO YOU SHOULD BE JEALOUS OF? 105 00:05:01,009 --> 00:05:04,179 YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU'RE INVITED, 106 00:05:04,220 --> 00:05:06,348 AND YOU'RE INVITED, AND YOU'RE INVITED, 107 00:05:06,389 --> 00:05:07,432 AND YOU, AND YOU, AND YOU, AND YOU, AND YOU, AND YOU-- 108 00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:09,476 - CAR SEATS EIGHT. - AND YOU--WHAT? 109 00:05:09,517 --> 00:05:11,686 - THE CAR SEATS EIGHT. - THE LIMO SEATS EIGHT. 110 00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:14,731 OKAY, THEN JIM AND PAM, AND RYAN PLUS A GUEST. 111 00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:15,774 - NO THANKS. - NO. 112 00:05:15,815 --> 00:05:17,525 I'LL USE IT WHEN YOU'RE DONE. 113 00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:18,735 [humming] 114 00:05:18,777 --> 00:05:20,612 - I'LL GO-- - ME. 115 00:05:20,653 --> 00:05:22,739 WHOA... 116 00:05:22,781 --> 00:05:25,992 THE DUNDER MIFFLIN STOCK SYMBOL IS DMI. 117 00:05:26,034 --> 00:05:27,452 DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT STANDS FOR? 118 00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:29,329 DUMMIES, MORONS, AND IDIOTS 119 00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:32,123 BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT YOU'D HAVE TO BE TO OWN IT. 120 00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:33,291 AND AS ONE OF THOSE IDIOTS, 121 00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:35,126 I BELIEVE THE BOARD OWES ME ANSWERS. 122 00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:37,128 IF I GIVE YOU TEN BUCKS, CAN I SIT INSIDE? 123 00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:38,963 I HAD TO NARROW IT DOWN 124 00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:41,257 TO A COMBINATION OF WHO COULD FIT 125 00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:42,384 AND WHO WANTED TO COME. 126 00:05:42,425 --> 00:05:43,343 [IN A BRITISH ACCENT] LIFESTYLES 127 00:05:43,385 --> 00:05:44,761 OF THE RICH AND FAMOUS. 128 00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:47,097 [IN A BRITISH ACCENT] OF THE RICH AND FAMOUS. 129 00:05:47,138 --> 00:05:49,474 UH, DRIVER, PULL OVER. THIS IS MY STOP. 130 00:06:00,235 --> 00:06:01,945 I WISH THE WINDOWS WEREN'T TINTED 131 00:06:01,986 --> 00:06:03,822 SO PEOPLE COULD SEE US IN HERE. 132 00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:05,782 I HAVE ARRIVED. 133 00:06:05,824 --> 00:06:07,992 ACTUALLY, I WILL BE ARRIVING-- 134 00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:09,744 DRIVER, WHEN DO WE ARRIVE? 135 00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:11,162 ABOUT TWO HOURS. 136 00:06:11,204 --> 00:06:12,664 SEE, THAT'S THE THING ABOUT A LIMO: 137 00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:17,002 YOU'VE ACTUALLY ARRIVED BEFORE YOU EVEN ARRIVED, RIGHT? 138 00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:19,879 HEY GUYS, DO YOU THINK ANYONE MIGHT HAVE HAD SEX IN HERE? 139 00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:20,964 - DEFINITELY. - SOUNDS LIKE IT. 140 00:06:21,006 --> 00:06:22,007 DEFINITELY. 141 00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:23,425 LOOK, THEY GOT PILLOWS. 142 00:06:23,466 --> 00:06:25,510 THAT, THAT'S BIGGER THAN MY BED. 143 00:06:25,552 --> 00:06:28,179 - WORD! - YEAH, YEAH! 144 00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:30,056 WHO'S PLAYING WITH THE BUTTON? 145 00:06:30,849 --> 00:06:33,184 MICHAEL, WHAT IF SOMEBODY ASKS YOU A QUESTION 146 00:06:33,226 --> 00:06:34,352 AT THIS MEETING? 147 00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:35,854 ARE YOU JUST GONNA WAVE OR WHAT? 148 00:06:35,895 --> 00:06:37,272 I WILL HAVE TO ANSWER. 149 00:06:37,313 --> 00:06:39,357 - I'LL ASK YOU A QUESTION. - MAKE IT A SOFTBALL. 150 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:41,776 SOMETHING HE CAN, LIKE, CRANK OUT OF THE PARK. 151 00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:44,195 MICHAEL SCOTT, YOU RUN THE MOST PROFITABLE BRANCH 152 00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:45,947 OF DUNDER MIFFLIN, HOW DO YOU DO IT? 153 00:06:45,989 --> 00:06:47,532 NO, NO, THAT'S TOO HARD. 154 00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:51,286 SAY YOUR NAME IS ZAMBONI, AND THEN I WILL SAY, 155 00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:53,872 "WELL, WE'RE SORT OF ON THIN ICE." 156 00:06:53,913 --> 00:06:56,082 I WON'T SAY THAT, I'LL SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT. 157 00:06:57,751 --> 00:06:59,419 HEY, RYAN, COULD YOU START CONSOLIDATING 158 00:06:59,461 --> 00:07:01,379 ALL OF OUR ROLODEX INFORMATION INTO OUTLOOK? 159 00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:02,964 UH, IT DOESN'T SEEM LIKE THERE'S MUCH OF A POINT 160 00:07:03,006 --> 00:07:04,132 IF THE COMPANY'S GOING UNDER. 161 00:07:04,174 --> 00:07:05,633 BUT IF THE COMPANY DOESN'T GO UNDER, 162 00:07:05,675 --> 00:07:07,177 THEN WE'LL FINALLY HAVE ALL OUR CONTACTS IN ONE PROGRAM. 163 00:07:07,218 --> 00:07:08,345 THE COMPANY'S PROBABLY GOING UNDER, THOUGH. 164 00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:09,554 IT COULD GO EITHER WAY. 165 00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:10,764 SEEMS LIKE IT'S LEANING ONE WAY. 166 00:07:10,805 --> 00:07:11,848 MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST WAIT AND FIND OUT. 167 00:07:11,890 --> 00:07:12,849 - DEFINITELY. - OKAY. 168 00:07:12,891 --> 00:07:14,392 SO SHOULD WE WAIT TO FIND OUT 169 00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:15,852 BEFORE WE START DOING ALL THIS STUFF? 170 00:07:15,894 --> 00:07:18,313 NAH, MIGHT AS WELL DO IT NOW. 171 00:07:20,523 --> 00:07:22,609 YES, IT'S TRUE THAT THIS ALL MIGHT BE A WASTE OF TIME 172 00:07:22,650 --> 00:07:25,111 IF THE COMPANY GOES, AND LORD KNOWS 173 00:07:25,153 --> 00:07:27,614 I DON'T WANT TO WASTE RYAN'S TIME. 174 00:07:28,615 --> 00:07:30,116 MICHAEL, WAKE UP. WE'RE HERE. 175 00:07:30,158 --> 00:07:31,785 - WHAT? - WAKE UP. YO, YO, YO. 176 00:07:31,826 --> 00:07:32,952 OH, COME ON. 177 00:07:32,994 --> 00:07:36,164 YOU GUYS LET ME FALL ASLEEP IN THE LIMO? 178 00:07:36,206 --> 00:07:38,249 YOU GOT FAST FOOD? 179 00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:40,752 - GUYS. - IT WASN'T THAT GOOD. 180 00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:41,920 THE SUNDAES WERE GOOD. 181 00:07:41,961 --> 00:07:43,380 - YOU GOT SUNDAES. - MM-HMM. 182 00:07:43,421 --> 00:07:45,215 WE'LL STOP AGAIN ON THE WAY BACK. 183 00:07:45,256 --> 00:07:47,050 OH, I DON'T KNOW. TWICE IN ONE DAY? 184 00:07:47,092 --> 00:07:49,219 - WHAT DO I GET? NOTHING? - WHO CARES? 185 00:07:49,260 --> 00:07:51,388 THIS IS YOUR BIG DAY, COME ON. LET'S GO. 186 00:07:51,429 --> 00:07:53,098 - WHOO! - OH, MY GOD. 187 00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:55,975 THIS IS IT. 188 00:07:56,017 --> 00:07:57,435 ALL RIGHT. 189 00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:05,276 - MR. SCOTT? - YES. 190 00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:06,528 - I'M LAURIE. - OH, HI. 191 00:08:06,569 --> 00:08:07,862 THANK YOU FOR JOINING US. COME WITH ME. 192 00:08:07,904 --> 00:08:09,948 WELL, THANK YOU, AND PLEASE CALL ME-- 193 00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:13,118 - CONTINUE TO CALL ME MR. SCOTT. - OKAY. 194 00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:15,078 IF YOU JUST WANNA FOLLOW ME, I'LL TAKE YOU UP TO THE LOUNGE. 195 00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:17,163 WELL, I GUESS THAT'S AS FAR AS I CAN TAKE YOU GUYS. 196 00:08:17,205 --> 00:08:18,748 - SO... - GOOD LUCK, MICHAEL. 197 00:08:18,790 --> 00:08:20,166 SEE YOU LATER. 198 00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:23,753 OFFICERS. 199 00:08:23,795 --> 00:08:25,046 - THANK YOU. - RIGHT HERE, MR. SCOTT. 200 00:08:25,088 --> 00:08:27,090 THANK YOU. 201 00:08:27,132 --> 00:08:28,341 - MICHAEL. - HELLO. 202 00:08:28,383 --> 00:08:29,801 - SO GLAD YOU COULD MAKE IT. - THANK YOU. 203 00:08:29,843 --> 00:08:30,802 HOW WAS THE RIDE? 204 00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:32,470 OH, IT WAS AWESOME. 205 00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:34,472 - VERY, VERY SUBLIME. - I'M GLAD. 206 00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:36,307 I WANT TO INTRODUCE YOU TO EVERYONE. 207 00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:38,309 UH, FIRST WE'LL START WITH ALAN BRAND. 208 00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:41,646 ALAN, CEO, MICHAEL SCOTT, BRANCH MANAGER, SCRANTON. 209 00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:42,897 IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU, MICHAEL. 210 00:08:42,939 --> 00:08:43,982 NICE TO MEET YOU TOO. 211 00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:45,984 IT'S AN HONOR AND A PRIVILEGE. 212 00:08:46,026 --> 00:08:47,819 AND SEATED, WE HAVE THE FORMER CONGRESSMAN 213 00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:48,862 CHRIS O'KEEFE. 214 00:08:48,903 --> 00:08:50,864 AH, YOUR EMINENCE. 215 00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:53,408 FOR THOSE OF YOU WITH QUESTIONS, 216 00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:55,618 PLEASE LINE UP BEHIND ONE OF THE FOUR MICROPHONES 217 00:08:55,660 --> 00:08:56,786 THAT HAVE BEEN PLACED IN THE AISLES. 218 00:08:56,828 --> 00:08:58,872 COMING THROUGH. CHE, CHE, CHE, CHE! 219 00:09:04,919 --> 00:09:06,379 [clears throat] 220 00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:15,347 EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME. 221 00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:17,390 EXCUSE ME. EXCUSE ME. 222 00:09:17,432 --> 00:09:19,559 AHH, DAMN IT. 223 00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:23,605 WHAT--OKAY. [grunts] 224 00:09:25,065 --> 00:09:28,276 I WAS HOPING TO LOB MICHAEL A SOFTBALL QUESTION EARLY. 225 00:09:28,318 --> 00:09:30,236 I WANTED TO SWING BY THE GARMENT DISTRICT 226 00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:32,447 AND PICK UP A FEW CRATES OF MY SHIRTS. 227 00:09:32,489 --> 00:09:33,907 I GOT A SHIRT GUY. 228 00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:37,369 CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS? 229 00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:39,245 THE MONEY THEY SPENT ON THIS CONVENTION HALL. 230 00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:41,039 EXCUSE ME, MISS. 231 00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:43,041 I JUST WANT TO TAKE THOSE STUPID BOARD OF DIRECTORS 232 00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:44,167 BY THEIR NECKS. 233 00:09:44,209 --> 00:09:47,253 - THIS IS SO SIMPLE. - OH, YEAH. 234 00:09:47,295 --> 00:09:49,214 WELL, YOU SHOULD DO THAT. GET IN LINE. 235 00:09:49,255 --> 00:09:51,174 OH, WHAT A GREAT IDEA. AND LOSE MY JOB? 236 00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:54,052 NO, THANK YOU. 237 00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:57,597 LOOK, DON'T YOU WANNA BE ABLE TO TELL YOUR GRANDKIDS 238 00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:58,890 YOU STOOD UP FOR YOURSELF 239 00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:02,852 DURING AMERICA'S BIGGEST FINANCIAL CRISIS? 240 00:10:02,894 --> 00:10:05,480 HOW IS HE GONNA HAVE GRANDKIDS? 241 00:10:06,773 --> 00:10:08,650 YOU GUYS EVER PROTECT THE PRESIDENT? 242 00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:10,068 NO. 243 00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:11,569 WHAT ABOUT MADONNA? 244 00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:14,447 OR THE OBAMA TWINS? ANYBODY FAMOUS? 245 00:10:14,489 --> 00:10:16,199 WE'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TALK ABOUT IT. 246 00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:17,409 NELLY FURTADO. 247 00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:19,786 ALL RIGHT, GUYS. 248 00:10:19,828 --> 00:10:20,995 ARE YOU READY? 249 00:10:21,037 --> 00:10:22,872 * ROCK AND ROLL ♪ 250 00:10:27,252 --> 00:10:30,338 [crowd booing] 251 00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,938 DUNDER MIFFLIN IS STILL A STRONG COMPANY. 252 00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:49,441 WE ARE POISED TO COME THROUGH THIS 253 00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:52,986 MORE STREAMLINED AND PROFITABLE THAN EVER. 254 00:10:53,028 --> 00:10:54,779 [overlapping shouting] 255 00:10:54,821 --> 00:10:57,073 THIS IS NOT AS MUCH FUN AS I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE. 256 00:10:57,115 --> 00:10:59,617 IT WAS FUN WHEN WE WEREN'T ON THE BRINK OF BANKRUPTCY. 257 00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:01,161 WE'RE GOING BANKRUPT, YOU THINK? 258 00:11:01,202 --> 00:11:03,705 [overlapping shouting] 259 00:11:03,747 --> 00:11:06,332 THEY ARE REALLY ANGRY. 260 00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:09,044 THE SHAREHOLDERS NEED TO EMPOWER OUR LEADERSHIP... 261 00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:10,587 I'M JUST GONNA RUN TO THE BATHROOM. 262 00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:11,546 WILL YOU SAVE MY PLACE? 263 00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:12,714 - SURE. - NO. 264 00:11:12,756 --> 00:11:14,716 - YOU WILL NOT. - EXCUSE ME? 265 00:11:14,758 --> 00:11:16,634 OH, I'M SORRY, WERE YOU RAISED IN A HOUSEHOLD 266 00:11:16,676 --> 00:11:18,094 WITH NO CONSEQUENCES? 267 00:11:18,136 --> 00:11:19,554 IT'LL JUST BE A SECOND. 268 00:11:19,596 --> 00:11:22,724 OH, IF ONLYS AND JUSTS WERE CANDIES AND NUTS, 269 00:11:22,766 --> 00:11:25,518 THEN EVERYDAY WOULD BE ERNTEDANKFEST. 270 00:11:28,313 --> 00:11:30,523 THERE ARE MANY THINGS TO BE OPTIMISTIC ABOUT 271 00:11:30,565 --> 00:11:32,025 IN DUNDER MIFFLIN'S FUTURE, 272 00:11:32,067 --> 00:11:35,362 AND ONE OF THEM IS HERE WITH US TODAY. 273 00:11:35,403 --> 00:11:39,282 MICHAEL SCOTT, SCRANTON BRANCH MANAGER. 274 00:11:39,324 --> 00:11:40,825 [applauding] YES! 275 00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:42,369 IN THESE UNCERTAIN TIMES, MICHAEL HAS MANAGED 276 00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:45,747 TO MAINTAIN STEADY PROFITS FROM HIS SCRANTON BRANCH. 277 00:11:45,789 --> 00:11:49,042 WE ALL THANK YOU, MICHAEL. 278 00:11:49,084 --> 00:11:50,752 [minimal applause] 279 00:11:50,794 --> 00:11:53,213 ANOTHER BRIGHT SPOT IN THE DUNDER MIFFLIN LANDSCAPE, 280 00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:57,175 OUR NEW WASTE-PULP RE-PURPOSING PLANT IN MILFORD. 281 00:11:57,217 --> 00:12:00,970 [applause] 282 00:12:01,012 --> 00:12:03,682 HEY, PHYLLIS, ARE YOU JUST GETTING BACK FROM LUNCH NOW? 283 00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:05,392 BOB TOOK ME TO CAPELLO'S. 284 00:12:05,433 --> 00:12:07,644 WE GOT A LITTLE TIPSY. 285 00:12:07,686 --> 00:12:09,270 OKAY, SHOULDN'T BE TELLING ME THAT STUFF 286 00:12:09,312 --> 00:12:11,731 AND ALSO SHOULDN'T BE TAKING TWO HOUR LUNCHES 287 00:12:11,773 --> 00:12:12,941 WITHOUT TELLING ME. 288 00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:14,484 OH, IT'S OKAY, MICHAEL DOESN'T REALLY CARE 289 00:12:14,526 --> 00:12:15,652 ABOUT THESE THINGS. 290 00:12:15,694 --> 00:12:16,945 I CARE ABOUT 'EM, 291 00:12:16,986 --> 00:12:18,613 AND I'M JUST AS MUCH OF A BOSS AS MICHAEL. 292 00:12:18,655 --> 00:12:20,865 [laughter] 293 00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:23,326 WHAT'S SO FUNNY? I'M A CO-MANAGER. 294 00:12:23,368 --> 00:12:24,661 THAT DOESN'T MAKE YOU A BOSS. 295 00:12:24,703 --> 00:12:27,122 IT'S NOT LIKE YOU CAN FIRE PEOPLE OR ANYTHING. 296 00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:30,500 WELL, WHO--HOW DID YOU-- WHO TOLD YOU THIS? 297 00:12:30,542 --> 00:12:32,419 - WE CAN'T SAY. - RYAN. 298 00:12:32,460 --> 00:12:33,837 SORRY, I'M PLASTERED. 299 00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:36,089 OKAY, WHO ELSE HAS HEARD THE RUMOR 300 00:12:36,131 --> 00:12:39,551 THAT I AM NOT AS MUCH IN CHARGE AS MICHAEL? 301 00:12:43,972 --> 00:12:46,474 STUFF GETS AROUND. I DON'T PARTICIPATE. 302 00:12:46,516 --> 00:12:49,102 WHO HERE HEARD IT FROM RYAN? 303 00:12:49,144 --> 00:12:51,479 - DOES AN EMAIL COUNT? - YES. 304 00:12:51,521 --> 00:12:53,106 THEN YEAH. 305 00:12:53,148 --> 00:12:55,233 I AM JUST AS MUCH OF A BOSS AS MICHAEL, 306 00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:57,610 AND I CAN DO ANYTHING THAT MICHAEL CAN DO. 307 00:12:57,652 --> 00:12:59,112 ALL RIGHT. 308 00:12:59,154 --> 00:13:01,906 WHO HERE BELIEVES THAT I HAVE AS MUCH POWER AS MICHAEL? 309 00:13:08,163 --> 00:13:10,457 I FORGOT I HAVE TO SUPPORT HIM NO MATTER WHAT. 310 00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:12,250 CLOSE ONE. 311 00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:15,128 BUT NO, JIM DOESN'T HAVE VERY MUCH POWER. 312 00:13:15,170 --> 00:13:16,546 IT'S A TOUGH OFFICE. 313 00:13:16,588 --> 00:13:20,008 HE SHOULD, FOR SURE. HE'S EARNED IT. 314 00:13:20,050 --> 00:13:22,969 OKAY, HERE'S THE THING. WHAT IS A CO-MANAGER? 315 00:13:23,011 --> 00:13:26,723 MOVE IT UP, BUDDY. COME ON. 316 00:13:26,765 --> 00:13:29,601 I WAS THE SHORTEST EVER LINE LEADER IN PRESCHOOL. 317 00:13:29,642 --> 00:13:31,144 I WAS 3'2", 318 00:13:31,186 --> 00:13:33,480 BUT I WAS IN CHARGE OF KEEPING CHILDREN UP TO 3'6" 319 00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:35,065 IN A SINGLE FILE. 320 00:13:35,106 --> 00:13:38,985 THEY HATED ME, BUT I WASN'T THERE TO MAKE FRIENDS. 321 00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:39,986 MOVE IT. 322 00:13:40,028 --> 00:13:41,738 THESE QUESTIONS ARE BUSH LEAGUE. 323 00:13:41,780 --> 00:13:44,032 YOU SHOULD GET UP AND SAY SOMETHING. 324 00:13:44,074 --> 00:13:47,577 YOU GOTTA BE TRUE TO WHAT'S IN THERE. 325 00:13:47,619 --> 00:13:49,829 DON'T BE A WUSS. 326 00:13:49,871 --> 00:13:51,289 OSCAR, THINK ABOUT IT. 327 00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:53,667 DON'T YOU WANT TO BE ABLE TO TELL YOUR GRANDKIDS 328 00:13:53,708 --> 00:13:55,877 THAT YOU STOOD UP FOR YOURSELF? 329 00:13:55,919 --> 00:13:57,545 ASSUMING YOU FIND A SURROGATE 330 00:13:57,587 --> 00:13:59,839 AND THEN YOUR SON FINDS A SURROGATE. 331 00:13:59,881 --> 00:14:03,301 THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT OUR PLAN... 332 00:14:03,343 --> 00:14:06,054 IF YOU GO, I'LL GO. 333 00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:09,224 YOU KNOW WHAT? LET'S DO IT. 334 00:14:11,893 --> 00:14:12,977 I'VE ALWAYS BEEN THE GUY 335 00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:15,063 WHO CAN RALLY OTHER PEOPLE TO REBEL. 336 00:14:15,105 --> 00:14:16,606 IN HIGH SCHOOL, I ORGANIZED A WALKOUT 337 00:14:16,648 --> 00:14:17,899 OVER STANDARDIZED TESTING. 338 00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:21,069 GOT OVER 500 STUDENTS TO JUST SKIP THE SATS. 339 00:14:21,111 --> 00:14:22,487 AT THE LAST SECOND, I CHICKENED OUT. 340 00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:24,531 TOOK IT ANYWAY. GOT A 1220. 341 00:14:24,572 --> 00:14:26,574 ALWAYS REGRETTED IT. 342 00:14:26,616 --> 00:14:29,911 I FEEL LACHRYMOSE. 343 00:14:29,953 --> 00:14:33,081 BELIEVE ME, EVERYONE IS WORKING VERY HARD, 344 00:14:33,123 --> 00:14:36,292 WORKING WEEKENDS, STRUGGLING, TRYING TO RIGHT THE SHIP. 345 00:14:36,334 --> 00:14:37,585 YOU'RE CRIMINALS! 346 00:14:37,627 --> 00:14:38,753 - [overlapping shouting] - HEY, HEY, HEY! 347 00:14:38,795 --> 00:14:41,756 I'M SORRY. THESE ARE NOT CRIMINALS. 348 00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:42,966 THEY'RE NICE. 349 00:14:43,008 --> 00:14:45,301 THEY INVITED ME TO COME HERE TODAY. 350 00:14:45,343 --> 00:14:48,096 THEY INVITED ME TO THEIR HOSPITALITY SUITE, 351 00:14:48,138 --> 00:14:51,558 WHERE I HAD FREE FOOD, AND IT WAS DELICIOUS. 352 00:14:51,599 --> 00:14:53,268 GET THIS. YOU KNOW HOW NICE THEY ARE? 353 00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:54,936 THEY SENT A STRETCH LIMO 354 00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:57,063 ALL THE WAY TO PICK ME UP IN SCRANTON. 355 00:14:57,105 --> 00:14:59,441 - LIMOUSINE? - YES. 356 00:14:59,482 --> 00:15:02,068 YOU'RE ALL CORRUPT. YOU SHOULD BE IN JAIL! 357 00:15:02,110 --> 00:15:04,779 QUIET! QUIET, PLEASE! 358 00:15:04,821 --> 00:15:07,949 PLEASE, QUIET! QUIET, PLEASE. 359 00:15:07,991 --> 00:15:11,286 WE WANT TO HEAR YOUR QUESTIONS. 360 00:15:11,327 --> 00:15:15,123 DO YOU LOVE HER, OR DO YOU LOVE THE IDEA OF HER? 361 00:15:15,165 --> 00:15:17,625 I DON'T KNOW, MAN. I JUST DON'T KNOW. 362 00:15:17,667 --> 00:15:19,627 I GOTTA MAKE AN EXAMPLE OUT OF HIM. 363 00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:20,628 SHOULD I JUST FIRE HIM? 364 00:15:20,670 --> 00:15:22,380 CAN YOU ACTUALLY FIRE PEOPLE? 365 00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:23,840 TO BE HONEST, I DON'T KNOW. 366 00:15:23,882 --> 00:15:26,301 BUT MAYBE I COULD JUST YELL AT HIM IN FRONT OF PEOPLE. 367 00:15:26,343 --> 00:15:28,720 WELL, I CAN'T REALLY IMAGINE YOU YELLING AT ANYONE. 368 00:15:28,762 --> 00:15:30,638 OH, I YELL. YOU'VE HEARD ME YELL. 369 00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:33,016 OKAY. I'VE HEARD YOU EXCLAIM. 370 00:15:33,058 --> 00:15:36,519 LIKE THE TIME YOU SAID, "HEY LOOK, WE PARKED OVER HERE." 371 00:15:36,561 --> 00:15:37,562 WELL, THAT WAS APPLE PICKING DAY. 372 00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:38,813 THERE'S NO NEED TO YELL THAT DAY. 373 00:15:38,855 --> 00:15:40,899 YOU KNOW, I WAS JUST EXCITED TO FIND THE CAR. 374 00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:43,860 PERFECT END TO A PERFECT DAY. 375 00:15:43,902 --> 00:15:46,446 WELL, YOU'LL FIGURE IT OUT. 376 00:15:48,365 --> 00:15:50,200 SO WHAT I GUESS WHAT MY QUESTION IS, 377 00:15:50,241 --> 00:15:53,161 IS HOW EXACTLY... [microphone pops] 378 00:15:53,203 --> 00:15:55,830 - THIS MIC ISN'T WORKING. - I'M SORRY. 379 00:15:55,872 --> 00:15:59,793 WHY DOESN'T YOUR LINE JUST JOIN IN WITH THAT LINE OVER THERE? 380 00:15:59,834 --> 00:16:01,670 - PLEASE. THAT'S FINE. - WAIT, WAIT. WHAT? 381 00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:04,089 JOIN IN? NO, THAT IS NOT HOW IT WORKS. 382 00:16:04,130 --> 00:16:06,007 NOT OKAY. BACK OF THE LINE. 383 00:16:06,049 --> 00:16:07,717 ALAN, YO. HELP ME OUT HERE. 384 00:16:07,759 --> 00:16:10,470 HELLO? OH, THANK YOU. IT'S MUCH BETTER. 385 00:16:10,512 --> 00:16:12,847 IT'S NOT OUR FAULT THAT HER MIC IS BROKEN! 386 00:16:12,889 --> 00:16:15,975 IS THAT BOARD MEMBER WAVING AT YOU? 387 00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:18,269 YEAH, THAT'S MY UNCLE CHAUNCEY. 388 00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:20,230 HI, UNCLE CHAUNCEY. 389 00:16:20,271 --> 00:16:21,981 [chuckles] HE'S HILARIOUS. 390 00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:24,526 DOES AN INCREDIBLE GERALD FORD IMPRESSION. 391 00:16:24,567 --> 00:16:25,527 THAT'S JUST GREAT. 392 00:16:25,568 --> 00:16:27,153 YOU KNOW, YOU NEVER MENTIONED 393 00:16:27,195 --> 00:16:28,738 THAT YOU HAD A RELATIVE ON THE BOARD. 394 00:16:28,780 --> 00:16:31,366 MM, YEAH. I GUESS NOT. 395 00:16:31,408 --> 00:16:33,743 YOU'VE BEEN PUSHING ME TO RISK MY JOB. 396 00:16:33,785 --> 00:16:35,453 AND I'M GUESSING THERE'S NO WAY IN THE WORLD 397 00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:37,038 THAT YOU COULD EVER GET FIRED. 398 00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:39,374 I COULD BE FIRED. 399 00:16:39,416 --> 00:16:43,211 IT'S JUST MY DAD WOULD PROBABLY THEN FIRE CHAUNCEY'S KID. 400 00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:46,131 IT WOULD MAKE THANKSGIVING PRETTY WEIRD. 401 00:16:46,172 --> 00:16:48,216 WHAT? 402 00:16:48,258 --> 00:16:52,262 YEAH, I HAVE AN UNCLE ON THE BOARD, BIG DEAL. 403 00:16:52,303 --> 00:16:54,556 I ALSO HAVE A GRANDFATHER WHO'S DRIVING A ROLLS-ROYCE 404 00:16:54,597 --> 00:16:56,433 AROUND THE WORLD AND A COUSIN 405 00:16:56,474 --> 00:16:59,185 WHO'S GONNA BE THE NINTH COMMERCIAL SPACE TOURIST. 406 00:16:59,227 --> 00:17:01,396 NOT EVERYTHING IS RELEVANT. 407 00:17:01,438 --> 00:17:04,983 OKAY, WE'RE GONNA TAKE A 15-MINUTE BREAK, 408 00:17:05,025 --> 00:17:06,901 AND THEN WE'RE GONNA ANSWER MORE QUESTIONS. 409 00:17:06,943 --> 00:17:08,069 YOU HAVEN'T SAID ANYTHING YET, 410 00:17:08,111 --> 00:17:09,612 AND WE'RE HEADED FOR BANKRUPTCY. 411 00:17:09,654 --> 00:17:11,239 [overlapping shouting] 412 00:17:11,281 --> 00:17:12,907 YEAH, WELL, THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN. 413 00:17:12,949 --> 00:17:14,117 THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN. 414 00:17:14,159 --> 00:17:15,535 WE'LL BE BACK WITH SOME ANSWERS. 415 00:17:15,577 --> 00:17:17,996 WHAT? WHAT ANSWERS? 416 00:17:18,038 --> 00:17:21,291 I--OKAY, I KNOW, THAT YOU'RE MAD AT ME 417 00:17:21,332 --> 00:17:22,792 AND YOU'RE MAD AT ALL OF THEM-- 418 00:17:22,834 --> 00:17:24,210 HOW ARE YOU GONNA FIX THE COMPANY? 419 00:17:24,252 --> 00:17:27,881 OKAY, ALL RIGHT... [cheers and applause] 420 00:17:27,922 --> 00:17:31,343 ALL RIGHT, WE ARE GONNA-- WE'RE GONNA GO OUT THERE 421 00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:35,597 DURING THIS BREAK, AND WE ARE GONNA COME BACK WITH A PLAN. 422 00:17:35,638 --> 00:17:37,474 WE'RE GONNA COME BACK WITH A PLAN FOR YOU. 423 00:17:37,515 --> 00:17:39,642 IT'S A 45-DAY PLAN. 424 00:17:39,684 --> 00:17:42,896 45 DAYS TO GET US BACK ON TRACK. 425 00:17:42,937 --> 00:17:44,272 YEAH! [applause] 426 00:17:44,314 --> 00:17:46,483 45 POINTS. 427 00:17:46,524 --> 00:17:49,527 IT'S A 45-DAY, 45-POINT, ONE POINT PER DAY. 428 00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:51,905 WE GET 45 POINTS, WE'RE BACK IN BUSINESS. 429 00:17:51,946 --> 00:17:54,324 [cheers and applause] 430 00:17:54,366 --> 00:17:57,327 AND YOU CAN TAKE THAT TO THE BANK. 431 00:17:57,369 --> 00:17:59,579 AND LIMO LADY, 432 00:17:59,621 --> 00:18:01,956 WE ARE GOING COMPLETELY CARBON NEUTRAL. 433 00:18:01,998 --> 00:18:04,209 [cheers and applause] 434 00:18:07,879 --> 00:18:10,090 I LOVE YOU, NEW YORK! 435 00:18:26,523 --> 00:18:28,191 YOU! YOU! 436 00:18:31,778 --> 00:18:33,029 HEY, RYAN, HOW'S IT GO-- 437 00:18:33,071 --> 00:18:34,447 HERE'S THE THING, UM, 438 00:18:34,489 --> 00:18:36,866 I'VE TRIED IT, LIKE, FIVE DIFFERENT WAYS IN MY HEAD, 439 00:18:36,908 --> 00:18:38,576 AND--OH, GOT ONE, 440 00:18:38,618 --> 00:18:42,872 UM, I'M SUCH A PERFECTIONIST THAT I'D KINDA RATHER 441 00:18:42,914 --> 00:18:45,000 NOT DO IT AT ALL THAN DO A CRAPPY VERSION. 442 00:18:45,041 --> 00:18:46,167 IT'S SIMPLE DATA ENTRY, THOUGH, 443 00:18:46,209 --> 00:18:47,669 SO THERE'S REALLY ONLY ONE WAY TO DO IT. 444 00:18:47,711 --> 00:18:49,504 SOUNDS LIKE YOU HAVE A REALLY SPECIFIC VISION FOR IT. 445 00:18:49,546 --> 00:18:51,131 DO YOU WANNA MAYBE JUST TAKE A WHACK AT IT? 446 00:18:51,172 --> 00:18:52,298 HOW DO I PUT THIS? 447 00:18:52,340 --> 00:18:55,385 IT'S HARD FOR ME TO GET IT UP 448 00:18:55,427 --> 00:18:58,221 FOR A SYSTEM I THINK IS CORRUPT, 449 00:18:58,263 --> 00:19:01,224 AND CAPITALISM IS CORRUPT. 450 00:19:01,266 --> 00:19:02,517 - YOU KNOW WHAT? - WHAT? 451 00:19:02,559 --> 00:19:04,060 - I THINK I KNOW THE PROBLEM. - GREAT. 452 00:19:04,102 --> 00:19:06,730 - I THINK YOU SEEM DISTRACTED. - YEP, THAT IS THE PROBLEM. 453 00:19:06,771 --> 00:19:08,148 AND YOU KNOW WHAT, I CAME UP WITH SOMETHING. 454 00:19:08,189 --> 00:19:09,607 AND I THINK IT'S REALLY GONNA HELP. 455 00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:11,109 WELL, I'M GLAD YOU'RE FINALLY BEING PROACTIVE, JIM. 456 00:19:11,151 --> 00:19:13,194 I AM TOO. LET ME SHOW YOU. 457 00:19:15,447 --> 00:19:17,991 WOW, THINGS ARE REALLY PICKING UP. 458 00:19:18,033 --> 00:19:19,451 WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT? 459 00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:22,537 - WHAT? - YOU WERE SUPPOSE TO WAVE. 460 00:19:22,579 --> 00:19:24,122 I DID WAVE. I DID A LOT MORE THAN WAVE. 461 00:19:24,164 --> 00:19:25,457 WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TELL THEM NOW? 462 00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:27,250 OKAY, YOU'VE DUG US QUITE A HOLE. 463 00:19:27,292 --> 00:19:29,210 WE TELL THEM THE PLAN, RIGHT? 464 00:19:29,252 --> 00:19:31,254 THERE IS NO PLAN. 465 00:19:32,756 --> 00:19:35,884 THERE'S ALWAYS A WAY OUT, ALWAYS. 466 00:19:35,925 --> 00:19:39,137 WHAT DOES A RABBIT DO WHEN IT CATCHES ITS LEG IN A TRAP? 467 00:19:39,179 --> 00:19:41,306 IT CHEWS ITS OWN LEG OFF. 468 00:19:41,348 --> 00:19:43,058 AND WHAT DOES THAT LEAVE BEHIND? 469 00:19:43,099 --> 00:19:46,311 A RABBIT'S FOOT, AND THAT'S LUCKY. 470 00:19:46,353 --> 00:19:48,480 AND THAT'S WHAT I FEEL LIKE RIGHT NOW, 471 00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:50,982 THAT I HAVE A LUCKY RABBIT'S FOOT. 472 00:19:51,024 --> 00:19:52,484 HERE'S WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO. 473 00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:55,904 THE 45-DAY THING THAT I OUTLINED, WE GO WITH THAT. 474 00:19:55,945 --> 00:19:57,405 DAY 45: COMPANY SAVED. 475 00:19:57,447 --> 00:19:59,491 DAY 44, GO. WHAT HAVE WE GOT? 476 00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:01,618 - WE HAVE 15 MINUTES. - EXCUSE ME? 477 00:20:01,659 --> 00:20:04,245 JUST WHATEVER COMES TO MIND, SHOUT IT OUT. 478 00:20:04,287 --> 00:20:05,413 WHO THE HELL IS THIS GUY? 479 00:20:05,455 --> 00:20:08,833 I AM THE GUY WHO ROUSED THAT CROWD... 480 00:20:08,875 --> 00:20:10,085 - YES... - GOT 'EM ON THEIR FEET. 481 00:20:10,126 --> 00:20:11,419 - YES. - THEY WERE SO HAPPY 482 00:20:11,461 --> 00:20:12,587 - DOWN THERE. - YES. 483 00:20:12,629 --> 00:20:13,546 WHO CARES? 484 00:20:15,757 --> 00:20:18,259 OKAY, ALL RIGHT. 485 00:20:18,301 --> 00:20:20,720 WELL, I KNOW A GUY-- THIS MEXICAN GUY. 486 00:20:20,762 --> 00:20:23,598 HE IS A MATH WHIZ; HE KNOWS ECONOMICS 487 00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:25,517 AS WELL AS HE KNOWS BULLFIGHTING, 488 00:20:25,558 --> 00:20:28,728 AND I AM GOING TO CALL IN A LITTLE FAVOR. 489 00:20:28,770 --> 00:20:30,522 NO, NO, DON'T CALL ANYBODY, MICHAEL. 490 00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:31,981 WELL, I'M TEXTING HIM, SO... 491 00:20:32,023 --> 00:20:33,942 PLEASE DO NOT TEXT ANYBODY NOW. 492 00:20:33,983 --> 00:20:36,194 MICHAEL. 493 00:20:36,236 --> 00:20:37,570 IT'S DONE. 494 00:20:38,321 --> 00:20:40,448 [phone buzzing] 495 00:20:43,076 --> 00:20:45,245 OH, THERE HE IS. 496 00:20:45,286 --> 00:20:47,080 COME ON IN. COME ON IN. 497 00:20:47,122 --> 00:20:49,290 GENTLEMAN, I WOULD LIKE YOU TO MEET OSCAR--COME ON IN. 498 00:20:49,332 --> 00:20:50,375 DON'T BE SHY. 499 00:20:50,417 --> 00:20:52,168 THIS IS OSCAR MARTINEZ. 500 00:20:52,210 --> 00:20:53,837 OSCAR, WHY DON'T YOU COME OVER HERE? 501 00:20:53,878 --> 00:20:56,965 LET ME PRESENT YOU. STEP UP. STEP UP THERE. 502 00:20:57,007 --> 00:20:59,884 OSCAR IS AN ACCOUNTANT EXTRAORDINAIRE 503 00:20:59,926 --> 00:21:01,553 AT THE SCRANTON BRANCH, 504 00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:04,139 AND HE HAS A WONDERFUL IDEA AS TO HOW TO GET US OUT 505 00:21:04,180 --> 00:21:05,724 OF THIS MURKY, MURKY SITUATION. 506 00:21:05,765 --> 00:21:07,267 TAKE IT AWAY. 507 00:21:11,438 --> 00:21:13,440 I THINK THIS IS REALLY GONNA HELP. 508 00:21:13,481 --> 00:21:15,650 IF YOU CAN JUST HOLD UP HERE ONE SECOND. 509 00:21:15,692 --> 00:21:17,152 HEY, GUYS, JUST A QUICK ANNOUNCEMENT. 510 00:21:17,193 --> 00:21:18,737 IF I COULD HAVE EVERYONE'S ATTENTION. 511 00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:20,113 I JUST FIGURED YOU NEEDED A PLACE 512 00:21:20,155 --> 00:21:21,406 WHERE YOU COULD CONCENTRATE 513 00:21:21,448 --> 00:21:23,783 AND NOT BE BOTHERED BY BOTHERING PEOPLE. 514 00:21:23,825 --> 00:21:26,202 - OKAY. - LET ME SHOW YOU WHAT I MEAN. 515 00:21:26,244 --> 00:21:27,912 YOUR NEW OFFICE. 516 00:21:27,954 --> 00:21:29,831 HOW GREAT IS THAT, RIGHT? 517 00:21:29,873 --> 00:21:31,082 FOR A JOB WELL DONE. 518 00:21:31,124 --> 00:21:32,500 WELL, NOT DONE. 519 00:21:32,542 --> 00:21:35,253 I WILL--UH, I WILL DO MY WORK RIGHT NOW. 520 00:21:35,295 --> 00:21:36,463 - I WILL STAY LATE TONIGHT. - RIGHT. 521 00:21:36,504 --> 00:21:39,299 UM, I'M VERY SORRY ABOUT EVERYTHING. 522 00:21:39,341 --> 00:21:40,425 YOU'RE A GOOD KID. YOU KNOW WHAT? 523 00:21:40,467 --> 00:21:41,885 IT GETS BIGGER ONCE YOU'RE IN THERE. 524 00:21:41,926 --> 00:21:42,844 ENJOY IT. 525 00:21:47,057 --> 00:21:48,808 IS THERE INTERNET? 526 00:21:54,105 --> 00:21:55,440 UM... 527 00:21:56,941 --> 00:22:00,904 TELL THEM WHAT YOU TOLD ME. THIS IS GENIUS. 528 00:22:00,945 --> 00:22:03,948 TELL THEM ABOUT THE CASH FLOW. 529 00:22:03,990 --> 00:22:05,950 AND THE DUMPING OF PROPERTIES. 530 00:22:05,992 --> 00:22:08,578 AND THIS IS ALL... 531 00:22:08,620 --> 00:22:10,246 - UM... - IT'S ALL GOOD. 532 00:22:10,288 --> 00:22:13,875 IT'S ALL GOOD STUFF. LAY IT ON 'EM. 533 00:22:13,917 --> 00:22:16,586 I FEEL, AS DOES MR. SCOTT, 534 00:22:16,628 --> 00:22:18,755 THAT WE ARE IN THE BEST OF HANDS-- 535 00:22:18,797 --> 00:22:19,964 UH, CAPABLE HANDS-- 536 00:22:20,006 --> 00:22:23,551 THAT WASN'T WHAT YOU WERE SAYIN' TO ME. 537 00:22:23,593 --> 00:22:27,138 HE WAS MUCH MORE ARTICULATE, AND THAT WAS BETTER. 538 00:22:27,180 --> 00:22:28,264 - THAT'S-- - MUCH BETTER. 539 00:22:28,306 --> 00:22:29,516 I THINK THIS HAS GONE VERY WELL. 540 00:22:29,557 --> 00:22:30,725 - I-- - AND I THANK YOU. 541 00:22:30,767 --> 00:22:31,851 OKAY... 542 00:22:34,604 --> 00:22:36,231 HEY, HEY. 543 00:22:36,272 --> 00:22:37,899 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 544 00:22:37,941 --> 00:22:39,651 MICHAEL, I DIDN'T ASK TO COME UP HERE. 545 00:22:39,693 --> 00:22:42,987 WOW, MAN, THAT-- THAT WAS EMBARRASSING. 546 00:22:43,029 --> 00:22:44,489 - FOR ME. - FOR ME TOO. 547 00:22:44,531 --> 00:22:45,824 - FOR YOU? - YOU EMBARRASSED ME. 548 00:22:45,865 --> 00:22:47,742 YOU... HMM. 549 00:22:50,995 --> 00:22:54,165 WELL... 550 00:22:54,207 --> 00:22:56,543 THAT WAS A WASTE OF A TEXT. 551 00:22:56,584 --> 00:22:58,211 LET'S GET DOWN TO BRASS TACKS. 552 00:22:58,253 --> 00:23:00,338 I THINK THAT WE MIGHT BE IN TROUBLE. 553 00:23:00,380 --> 00:23:02,465 WE DON'T SEEM TO HAVE A PLAN, SO I'M THINKING, 554 00:23:02,507 --> 00:23:06,011 I GO DOWN THERE, MAYBE RATTLE OFF A FEW JOKES. 555 00:23:06,052 --> 00:23:07,429 CONGRESSMAN COULD FOLLOW. 556 00:23:07,470 --> 00:23:08,763 HE'S OUR BEST MANAGER? 557 00:23:08,805 --> 00:23:11,850 WHERE'S THE OFF BUTTON ON THIS MORON? 558 00:23:11,891 --> 00:23:15,645 UH, I'M NOT A MORON. 559 00:23:15,687 --> 00:23:20,358 TIME AFTER TIME, MY BRANCH LEADS IN SALES. 560 00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:23,194 I HAVE PERSONALLY WON OVER 17 DUNDEE AWARDS, 561 00:23:23,236 --> 00:23:24,696 SO I AM NOT A MORON. 562 00:23:24,738 --> 00:23:28,283 AND I'M JUST TRYING TO HELP, YOU KNOW, SO... 563 00:23:28,324 --> 00:23:29,784 YOU'RE THE MORON. 564 00:23:33,079 --> 00:23:35,707 ALL RIGHT, FELLAS, WE HAVE TO GET BACK DOWNSTAIRS. 565 00:23:35,749 --> 00:23:37,625 YES, WE DO, SO LET'S DO THIS THING. 566 00:23:37,667 --> 00:23:41,796 MICHAEL, WE'RE GONNA TAKE IT FROM HERE, OK? 567 00:23:41,838 --> 00:23:42,964 WITHOUT YOU. 568 00:23:45,508 --> 00:23:46,760 OKAY, ALL RIGHT. 569 00:23:46,801 --> 00:23:48,386 I'LL HOLD DOWN THE FORT UP HERE. 570 00:23:48,428 --> 00:23:49,763 I THINK IT WOULD ACTUALLY BE BETTER 571 00:23:49,804 --> 00:23:51,765 IF YOU WEREN'T HERE WHEN WE GOT BACK. 572 00:23:53,391 --> 00:23:55,352 OKAY? 573 00:23:55,393 --> 00:23:57,645 ALL RIGHT. 574 00:23:57,687 --> 00:23:59,147 I... 575 00:23:59,189 --> 00:24:01,566 I WILL BE ROCKING THE LIMO. 576 00:24:01,608 --> 00:24:04,986 UH, HE CAN TAKE THE BUS. HE'S HAD HIS LIMO RIDE. 577 00:24:07,113 --> 00:24:09,282 THE GENTLEMAN IN THE GLASSES. 578 00:24:10,450 --> 00:24:12,702 DWIGHT SCHRUTE. SCRANTON BRANCH. 579 00:24:12,744 --> 00:24:14,245 I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT I HAVE BEEN STANDING 580 00:24:14,287 --> 00:24:16,581 IN THIS LINE ALL DAY. 581 00:24:16,623 --> 00:24:19,584 AND IF THIS LINE IS ANY INDICATION 582 00:24:19,626 --> 00:24:21,294 OF HOW THIS COMPANY IS BEING RUN, 583 00:24:21,336 --> 00:24:23,463 THEN WE ARE IN BIG TROUBLE. 584 00:24:23,505 --> 00:24:25,340 [cheers and applause] 585 00:24:29,344 --> 00:24:30,470 THANK YOU. 586 00:24:30,512 --> 00:24:32,972 RIGHT. I KNOW. 587 00:24:33,014 --> 00:24:36,726 AND I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT I BELIEVE 588 00:24:36,768 --> 00:24:39,062 THAT ARE OPTIONS OUT THERE. 589 00:24:39,104 --> 00:24:42,607 A TAKE-A-NUMBER OPTION LIKE THEY HAVE IN A DELI. 590 00:24:44,067 --> 00:24:46,945 WHAT ABOUT LINE VARIETIES, LIKE AN EXPRESS LINE, 591 00:24:46,986 --> 00:24:49,739 FOR QUICK COMMENTS OF TEN WORDS OR LESS? 592 00:24:49,781 --> 00:24:52,409 THEY CAN MOVE MUCH MORE EFFICIENTLY. 593 00:24:53,993 --> 00:24:57,372 WHAT ABOUT ROPES ALONG THE LINES THAT YOU CAN HOLD ON TO? 594 00:24:57,414 --> 00:24:59,749 THANK YOU. 595 00:24:59,791 --> 00:25:01,793 THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUGGESTIONS. 596 00:25:01,835 --> 00:25:03,003 YES. 597 00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:32,907 YES, IT IS A THRILL TO BE HONORED BY ONE'S COMPANY. 598 00:25:32,949 --> 00:25:34,701 TO HAVE THE PEOPLE THAT YOU WORK FOR 599 00:25:34,743 --> 00:25:36,661 STOP FOR A MINUTE AND SAY, 600 00:25:36,703 --> 00:25:39,205 "WOW, GREAT JOB." THAT'S WHAT IT'S ABOUT. 601 00:25:39,247 --> 00:25:41,291 THAT IS WHAT IT IS ALL ABOUT. 602 00:25:41,332 --> 00:25:42,834 NOT THE PERKS. THE PERKS-- 603 00:25:42,876 --> 00:25:45,128 THE PERKS, I COULD TAKE OR LEAVE THE PERKS. 604 00:25:45,170 --> 00:25:46,838 OSCAR! OSCAR, COME ON! 605 00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:50,300 BUT LIMOS ARE FOR PEOPLE WHO MAKE THE COMPANY MONEY, 606 00:25:50,342 --> 00:25:52,761 NOT LOSE MILLIONS AND HAVE NO PLAN, 607 00:25:52,802 --> 00:25:54,429 SO WE'RE LEAVING EARLY. 608 00:25:54,471 --> 00:25:56,181 - WHOO-HOO! - GO, GO, GO, GO, GO! 609 00:25:56,222 --> 00:25:57,515 GO, GO GO, GO! 610 00:25:57,557 --> 00:26:00,352 [cheering] 611 00:26:00,393 --> 00:26:01,686 DID YOU STEAL THAT? 612 00:26:01,728 --> 00:26:04,064 AFTER ALL, WE ARE THE ONLY ONES 613 00:26:04,105 --> 00:26:05,982 WITH ANYTHING TO CELEBRATE. 614 00:26:06,024 --> 00:26:09,194 all: SCRANTON, SCRANTON, SCRANTON, SCRANTON! 615 00:26:09,235 --> 00:26:11,946 [cheering] 616 00:26:11,988 --> 00:26:13,907 DUNDER MIFFLIN! 617 00:26:18,119 --> 00:26:21,915 UM, I HAVE A DENTIST APPOINTMENT TOMORROW MORNING. 618 00:26:21,956 --> 00:26:23,416 IT'S BEEN SCHEDULED A WHILE, 619 00:26:23,458 --> 00:26:24,834 AND I MIGHT BE A FEW MINUTES LATE. 620 00:26:24,876 --> 00:26:26,670 OKAY, THANKS FOR TELLING ME. 621 00:26:26,711 --> 00:26:28,922 IT'S JUST I THINK I HAVE A CAVITY, 622 00:26:28,963 --> 00:26:30,799 AND I DON'T WANT IT TO GET ANY WORSE. 623 00:26:30,840 --> 00:26:33,635 - THAT'S NO PROBLEM. - OKAY. 624 00:26:36,179 --> 00:26:38,223 I'LL JUST CANCEL IT. 625 00:26:38,264 --> 00:26:40,016 OH, I'LL CANCEL IT. 626 00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:52,320 OH, WAKE UP, MIKEY. 627 00:26:52,362 --> 00:26:53,988 COME ON, LITTLE ANGEL. 628 00:26:54,030 --> 00:26:55,949 HOME AGAIN, HOME AGAIN. JIGGITY JIG. 629 00:26:55,990 --> 00:26:58,827 - OH, OKAY. - MMM. 630 00:26:58,868 --> 00:27:01,579 OH, NO. NO, NO, NO, NO. 631 00:27:01,621 --> 00:27:03,832 GUYS, COME ON. 632 00:27:03,873 --> 00:27:05,667 IT'S OKAY. I GOT YOU SOME. 633 00:27:05,709 --> 00:27:07,168 NO, BUT I WANTED TO EAT IT 634 00:27:07,210 --> 00:27:08,878 WHILE WE WERE DRIVING IN THE LIMO. 635 00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:10,880 - THAT'S THE WHOLE THING. - IT JUST KIND OF HAPPENED. 636 00:27:10,922 --> 00:27:13,675 - HOW MANY MINUTES DO WE HAVE? - ONE. 637 00:27:13,717 --> 00:27:15,135 OKAY. 638 00:27:16,511 --> 00:27:18,847 OH. 639 00:27:18,888 --> 00:27:21,224 MMM, THAT'S PRETTY-- [gags] 640 00:27:22,726 --> 00:27:24,728 - WHAT FLAVOR IS THAT? - PISTACHIO. 641 00:27:24,769 --> 00:27:26,688 - WHAT THE HELL, DWIGHT? - YOU DON'T HAVE TO EAT IT. 642 00:27:26,730 --> 00:27:29,274 NO, I'LL EAT IT. I'LL EAT IT. 643 00:27:44,956 --> 00:27:46,583 UGH! 644 00:27:47,083 --> 00:27:50,045 {\an8}[cheerful music] 645 00:27:50,086 --> 00:27:57,052 {\an8}♪ ♪ 646 00:28:18,865 --> 00:28:20,950 {\an8}[bugle toots] 46748

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