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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:25,867 --> 00:00:27,733 Make sure I'm in the frame. 2 00:00:27,867 --> 00:00:29,699 Make sure you get my head. I want to see my hair. 3 00:00:29,834 --> 00:00:31,633 - All right, all right. - Janis, hurry up! 4 00:00:31,766 --> 00:00:33,001 It's not easy making a movie. 5 00:00:33,134 --> 00:00:34,699 You better not drop my phone. 6 00:00:35,333 --> 00:00:36,467 You got it? 7 00:00:36,599 --> 00:00:38,433 Yep. Yep. Yep. Okay, here we go. 8 00:00:38,566 --> 00:00:40,034 - Hey... Oh, Lord. - Shit. 9 00:00:40,168 --> 00:00:42,134 We're Cloverfielding. Pick it up. 10 00:00:42,268 --> 00:00:44,466 - Give me a minute. - Make sure I'm in the frame, girl. 11 00:00:44,599 --> 00:00:47,499 Give me a minute! Am I in the frame? 12 00:00:47,633 --> 00:00:48,767 - I'm in there? - Yes. 13 00:00:48,901 --> 00:00:50,234 Get me in the frame? Yeah. 14 00:00:50,367 --> 00:00:51,400 You got my head in there? Yeah. 15 00:00:51,533 --> 00:00:53,666 Boom, let's go. 16 00:00:53,801 --> 00:00:56,168 ♪ It's a cautionary tale ♪ 17 00:00:56,300 --> 00:00:57,934 ♪ Of fear and lust and pride ♪ 18 00:00:58,067 --> 00:01:02,333 ♪ Based on actual events Where people died ♪ 19 00:01:02,466 --> 00:01:03,666 No one died. 20 00:01:03,801 --> 00:01:04,834 ♪ But how far Would you go ♪ 21 00:01:04,967 --> 00:01:07,433 ♪ To be popular and hot? ♪ 22 00:01:07,566 --> 00:01:10,168 ♪ Would you resist temptation? ♪ 23 00:01:10,300 --> 00:01:11,533 ♪ No, you would not! ♪ 24 00:01:11,666 --> 00:01:13,300 ♪ Just admit it sometimes ♪ 25 00:01:13,432 --> 00:01:18,466 ♪ Mean is what you are Mean is easier than nice ♪ 26 00:01:18,599 --> 00:01:21,466 ♪ And though mean Can take you far ♪ 27 00:01:21,599 --> 00:01:24,934 ♪ Maybe this will Make you think twice ♪ 28 00:01:25,067 --> 00:01:26,734 Spin. Clicker. Fosse! 29 00:01:26,867 --> 00:01:30,633 ♪ This is a cautionary tale ♪ 30 00:01:31,566 --> 00:01:33,734 ♪ About corruption And betrayal ♪ 31 00:01:33,867 --> 00:01:36,134 ♪ And getting hit by a bus! ♪ 32 00:01:36,268 --> 00:01:39,499 ♪ You can't buy integrity ♪ 33 00:01:39,633 --> 00:01:44,734 ♪ At the mall It's not for sale ♪ 34 00:01:44,867 --> 00:01:45,666 Truth. 35 00:01:45,801 --> 00:01:49,432 ♪ This is a cautionary ♪ 36 00:01:49,566 --> 00:01:55,867 ♪ Tale! ♪ 37 00:02:12,834 --> 00:02:14,432 ♪ I used To think I would spend ♪ 38 00:02:14,566 --> 00:02:17,533 ♪ Every second I have ♪ 39 00:02:18,300 --> 00:02:20,867 ♪ Right where my story began ♪ 40 00:02:22,867 --> 00:02:24,533 ♪ I'd be happy here ♪ 41 00:02:24,667 --> 00:02:27,201 ♪ Every day, month Year of my life ♪ 42 00:02:27,333 --> 00:02:31,767 ♪ But now I'm wishing For whatever comes After goodbye ♪ 43 00:02:32,566 --> 00:02:35,599 ♪ On every star in the sky ♪ 44 00:02:37,333 --> 00:02:41,700 ♪ And I'm dreaming of What I could become ♪ 45 00:02:41,834 --> 00:02:44,901 ♪ This is where home will be ♪ 46 00:02:45,034 --> 00:02:48,566 ♪ As long as my lungs Can breathe ♪ 47 00:02:48,700 --> 00:02:52,201 ♪ But my heart is dyin' To leave ♪ 48 00:02:52,332 --> 00:02:54,967 ♪ 'Cause I know there's more To me ♪ 49 00:02:55,101 --> 00:02:57,399 ♪ I don't want to live with What ifs... ♪ 50 00:02:57,533 --> 00:02:58,767 Cady? 51 00:02:58,901 --> 00:03:00,700 I've been thinking about what you said. 52 00:03:00,834 --> 00:03:03,599 About being frustrated by my decision 53 00:03:03,734 --> 00:03:05,300 and feeling a little stuck here, 54 00:03:05,432 --> 00:03:06,499 just me and you. 55 00:03:06,634 --> 00:03:08,001 I'm sorry I yelled. 56 00:03:08,134 --> 00:03:10,168 But you have a point. 57 00:03:10,300 --> 00:03:11,466 Maybe I've been a little selfish, 58 00:03:11,599 --> 00:03:13,168 putting my research ahead 59 00:03:13,300 --> 00:03:14,967 of your social and emotional development. 60 00:03:15,101 --> 00:03:17,201 I called the people from Northwestern back. 61 00:03:17,332 --> 00:03:18,700 I took the job. 62 00:03:19,399 --> 00:03:20,566 What? 63 00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:22,268 But they need me to start on September 9th. 64 00:03:22,399 --> 00:03:25,934 ♪ I don't want to live With what ifs, might haves ♪ 65 00:03:26,067 --> 00:03:29,667 ♪ Could have been if I had ♪ Cady? 66 00:03:29,801 --> 00:03:34,268 ♪ Only tried, not held back Oh, no ♪ 67 00:03:34,399 --> 00:03:36,168 ♪ That's not a part of my plan ♪ 68 00:03:36,299 --> 00:03:39,634 ♪ That's not the me that I That's not the me that I am ♪ 69 00:03:39,767 --> 00:03:42,533 ♪ This time There's no lookin' back ♪ 70 00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:47,034 ♪ I'm crossing things Off my list ♪ 71 00:03:47,168 --> 00:03:50,834 ♪ Don't want to run out of time Before I wake up and find ♪ 72 00:03:50,967 --> 00:03:53,600 ♪ There was a life That I missed ♪ 73 00:03:54,533 --> 00:03:57,466 ♪ My limit doesn't exist ♪ 74 00:04:07,332 --> 00:04:08,934 I'll pick you up at 3:00. 75 00:04:14,901 --> 00:04:18,734 ♪ I don't want to live With what ifs, might haves ♪ 76 00:04:18,867 --> 00:04:22,533 ♪ Could have been if I had ♪ 77 00:04:22,667 --> 00:04:26,533 ♪ Only tried, not held back Oh, no ♪ 78 00:04:26,667 --> 00:04:30,101 ♪ That's not a part of my plan That's not the me that I am ♪ 79 00:04:30,233 --> 00:04:33,067 ♪ No what ifs, regrets ♪ 80 00:04:33,201 --> 00:04:36,801 ♪ Wear my strengths And weakness ♪ 81 00:04:36,934 --> 00:04:41,168 ♪ I won't hide my feelings Oh, no ♪ 82 00:04:41,299 --> 00:04:44,332 ♪ That's not a part of my plan That's not the... ♪ 83 00:04:44,466 --> 00:04:46,534 Bitch, move. 84 00:04:55,734 --> 00:04:57,267 Hope you all had a good summer. 85 00:04:57,399 --> 00:04:58,634 Mine was pretty good. 86 00:04:58,767 --> 00:05:01,201 I worked in my brother-in-law's 87 00:05:01,332 --> 00:05:02,834 golf pro shop. 88 00:05:02,967 --> 00:05:05,767 Did not make a lot of money, so of course I am back 89 00:05:05,901 --> 00:05:08,867 to help shepherd you all into the future. 90 00:05:14,534 --> 00:05:16,299 May I have everyone's attention, please? 91 00:05:16,432 --> 00:05:18,700 Eyes to the front of the room. 92 00:05:18,834 --> 00:05:21,801 You may notice we have a new student joining us today. 93 00:05:21,934 --> 00:05:23,634 She just moved here from Kentucky. 94 00:05:23,767 --> 00:05:24,500 Kenya. 95 00:05:24,634 --> 00:05:27,067 Kenya. Her name is Caddy. 96 00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:28,801 It's Cady. Cady Heron. 97 00:05:28,934 --> 00:05:31,432 My apologies. I will commit that to memory. 98 00:05:31,567 --> 00:05:35,366 Cady, like the Canadian songstress k.d. lang, 99 00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:38,934 and Heron, like the illegal street drug. 100 00:05:39,700 --> 00:05:41,567 Thank you, Caddy. It's Cady. 101 00:05:41,700 --> 00:05:44,366 Cady, hi. I'm Ms. Norbury. I'll be your homeroom teacher. 102 00:05:44,500 --> 00:05:45,700 This is your roster. 103 00:05:45,834 --> 00:05:47,534 I see I also have you for A.P. Calculus. 104 00:05:47,667 --> 00:05:49,700 You must have had excellent teachers at your old school. 105 00:05:49,834 --> 00:05:51,534 Oh, I was homeschooled. Homeschooled? 106 00:05:51,667 --> 00:05:54,366 Oh, that's a fun way to take jobs from my union. 107 00:05:54,500 --> 00:05:55,767 No, I'm joking. It's fine. Ah. 108 00:05:55,901 --> 00:05:57,734 Um, do you think you can follow this schedule? 109 00:05:57,867 --> 00:05:59,534 Yeah, I think so. Okay, you're gonna be moving 110 00:05:59,667 --> 00:06:01,267 from class to class with each... 111 00:06:03,134 --> 00:06:04,001 That's it. 112 00:06:04,734 --> 00:06:06,432 Everybody find a seat. 113 00:06:06,967 --> 00:06:07,867 Please. 114 00:06:11,600 --> 00:06:13,467 This is first period: 115 00:06:13,600 --> 00:06:15,067 American Literature. 116 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:17,067 ♪ My name is Mister Rapp ♪ 117 00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:19,500 ♪ And I take no...? ♪ 118 00:06:21,133 --> 00:06:23,934 ♪ My name is Mister Rapp And I take no...? ♪ 119 00:06:24,534 --> 00:06:25,767 "...care of myself"? 120 00:06:25,901 --> 00:06:30,767 "Crap." Correct answer was "crap." 121 00:06:32,001 --> 00:06:33,200 Find a seat. 122 00:06:33,332 --> 00:06:35,001 I don't want you to think of me 123 00:06:35,133 --> 00:06:36,467 as just any other teacher. 124 00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:37,901 I prefer to think of myself 125 00:06:38,034 --> 00:06:39,901 as a time traveler. 126 00:06:40,034 --> 00:06:43,834 Maintenant nous choisissons nos noms français. 127 00:06:44,500 --> 00:06:45,967 Cady. Comment tu t'appelles? 128 00:06:46,100 --> 00:06:48,332 Je m'appelle Cady. Incorrecte! 129 00:06:48,467 --> 00:06:50,967 You have to pick a French name. 130 00:06:51,100 --> 00:06:52,267 All the French people I know 131 00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:54,467 just call me Cady. 132 00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:56,500 Just say Marie. 133 00:06:57,233 --> 00:06:59,034 Um... Marie? 134 00:06:59,167 --> 00:07:00,600 Marie. 135 00:07:00,734 --> 00:07:03,200 J'anice. J'anice. 136 00:07:03,332 --> 00:07:05,901 Chanel. Non. 137 00:07:06,034 --> 00:07:07,332 Fantine. Non. 138 00:07:07,467 --> 00:07:08,767 Celine Dion? 139 00:07:08,901 --> 00:07:09,901 Non. 140 00:07:10,366 --> 00:07:11,767 Beyoncé. 141 00:07:11,901 --> 00:07:13,700 Quais. Mais non. 142 00:07:15,567 --> 00:07:18,267 Welcome to "Health and Human Sexuality." 143 00:07:18,400 --> 00:07:20,600 Now, this fall we'll be getting 144 00:07:20,734 --> 00:07:23,867 into the state-mandated unit on Abstinence. 145 00:07:24,001 --> 00:07:25,767 Of course then followed by, in the spring, 146 00:07:25,901 --> 00:07:27,600 Condoms and Choking. 147 00:07:27,734 --> 00:07:30,267 Where do you think you're going there, hotshot? 148 00:07:30,400 --> 00:07:32,034 I need to urinate. 149 00:07:32,167 --> 00:07:33,267 No way, José. 150 00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:34,934 Uh, it's Cady. 151 00:07:35,066 --> 00:07:36,267 Well, Cady, 152 00:07:36,400 --> 00:07:38,332 first thing you need to do is ask permission. 153 00:07:38,467 --> 00:07:40,001 But the second thing you'll need 154 00:07:40,133 --> 00:07:42,133 is this lavatory pass 155 00:07:42,267 --> 00:07:44,133 that is shaped like a sperm whale. 156 00:07:44,267 --> 00:07:45,500 Get it? 157 00:07:45,967 --> 00:07:47,167 Um... 158 00:07:47,299 --> 00:07:49,233 May I please have the lavatory pass? 159 00:07:49,367 --> 00:07:51,467 No, you may not. You may go sit back down. 160 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:54,299 You can go at lunch. Nice try, kiddo. 161 00:07:54,433 --> 00:07:55,734 All right, let's jump into this! 162 00:07:55,867 --> 00:07:58,400 This won't be awkward at all, I swear to God. 163 00:08:48,433 --> 00:08:50,801 Are you okay in there? 164 00:08:50,934 --> 00:08:52,100 Uh, yes. 165 00:08:52,233 --> 00:08:53,801 'Cause you've been in there a very long time. 166 00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:55,333 We're concerned you're either doing drugs 167 00:08:55,467 --> 00:08:56,834 or having a toilet baby. 168 00:08:59,467 --> 00:09:00,901 Hi. I'm Janis. 169 00:09:01,033 --> 00:09:02,834 And je m'appelle Sasha Fierce. 170 00:09:02,966 --> 00:09:04,033 This is Damian. 171 00:09:04,167 --> 00:09:05,400 He is almost too gay to function. 172 00:09:05,534 --> 00:09:07,834 But I push through. I manage. 173 00:09:07,966 --> 00:09:09,000 Hi. 174 00:09:09,133 --> 00:09:10,300 We've been watching you all day. 175 00:09:10,433 --> 00:09:11,700 You're a mess. 176 00:09:11,834 --> 00:09:15,901 So we volunteer to amplify your lunch experience. 177 00:09:16,033 --> 00:09:18,901 Yeah, what Damian is saying is we will help you, Caddy. 178 00:09:19,033 --> 00:09:23,167 Thanks so much. Um... it's Cady. 179 00:09:23,300 --> 00:09:25,433 Yeah. I'm gonna call you Caddy. 180 00:09:26,133 --> 00:09:27,200 Get out of the toilet! 181 00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:28,801 Mkay. 182 00:09:28,934 --> 00:09:31,933 You just need to find your clique and commit to it. 183 00:09:32,066 --> 00:09:33,367 You have your Jocks. 184 00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:38,000 Your Corny Horny Band Freaks. 185 00:09:41,367 --> 00:09:42,734 Your Classic Burnouts. 186 00:09:44,534 --> 00:09:45,634 Do any of these feel like your people? 187 00:09:45,767 --> 00:09:47,634 - I don't think so. - Hmm... 188 00:09:47,767 --> 00:09:49,600 You know what might be cute for her? 189 00:09:49,734 --> 00:09:50,901 What, Grade Grubbers? 190 00:09:51,033 --> 00:09:53,300 No, I was gonna say Theater Mess. 191 00:09:59,100 --> 00:10:00,700 And who's at that table? 192 00:10:00,834 --> 00:10:03,234 Oh, no, no, no. 193 00:10:03,367 --> 00:10:04,700 We call them the Plastics 194 00:10:04,834 --> 00:10:06,500 'cause they're shiny, fake and hard. 195 00:10:06,634 --> 00:10:08,167 Yeah, that's Gretchen Wieners. 196 00:10:08,300 --> 00:10:10,400 She knows everything about everybody. 197 00:10:10,534 --> 00:10:12,167 That's why her hair's so big. 198 00:10:12,300 --> 00:10:13,933 It's full of secrets. 199 00:10:14,066 --> 00:10:15,367 And that's Karen Shetty. 200 00:10:15,500 --> 00:10:16,966 She's the dumbest person you'll ever meet. 201 00:10:17,100 --> 00:10:20,634 I once saw her put a D in the word "orange." 202 00:10:23,300 --> 00:10:25,634 Could I just sit with you guys? 203 00:10:26,300 --> 00:10:27,600 I actually don't know. 204 00:10:27,734 --> 00:10:29,100 We've never been asked that question before. 205 00:10:29,234 --> 00:10:30,268 Could she? 206 00:10:30,400 --> 00:10:32,500 We are very exclusive, 207 00:10:32,634 --> 00:10:36,066 but I think we can make an exception. 208 00:10:38,168 --> 00:10:40,400 What was that? Oh, Lord, it's the Queen Bee. Don't look her in the eye! 209 00:10:53,634 --> 00:10:58,634 ♪ My name is Regina George ♪ 210 00:10:59,500 --> 00:11:04,667 ♪ And I am a massive deal ♪ 211 00:11:05,333 --> 00:11:07,767 ♪ Fear me, love me ♪ 212 00:11:07,900 --> 00:11:11,534 ♪ Stand and stare at me ♪ 213 00:11:11,667 --> 00:11:13,966 ♪ And these? ♪ 214 00:11:14,100 --> 00:11:15,767 ♪ These are real ♪ 215 00:11:15,900 --> 00:11:19,667 ♪ I've got money and looks ♪ 216 00:11:21,033 --> 00:11:25,500 ♪ I am, like, drunk with power ♪ 217 00:11:25,634 --> 00:11:31,168 ♪ This whole school Humps my leg ♪ 218 00:11:31,300 --> 00:11:34,667 ♪ Like a Chihuahua ♪ 219 00:11:34,801 --> 00:11:39,900 ♪ I'm the prettiest poison You've ever seen ♪ 220 00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:45,234 ♪ That filter you use Looks just like me ♪ 221 00:11:45,367 --> 00:11:50,134 ♪ My name is Regina George ♪ 222 00:11:50,268 --> 00:11:54,866 ♪ And I am a massive deal ♪ 223 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:59,734 ♪ I don't care who you are ♪ 224 00:11:59,866 --> 00:12:02,400 ♪ I don't care ♪ 225 00:12:02,534 --> 00:12:09,600 ♪ How you feel ♪ 226 00:12:09,734 --> 00:12:10,833 You. 227 00:12:10,966 --> 00:12:12,600 Yeah, you. Come here. 228 00:12:21,500 --> 00:12:22,700 Why don't I know you? 229 00:12:22,833 --> 00:12:25,833 I'm new. I just moved here from Kenya. 230 00:12:25,966 --> 00:12:27,467 Shut up. 231 00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:29,033 Shut up! 232 00:12:29,168 --> 00:12:30,667 I didn't say anything. 233 00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:32,467 You're, like, really pretty. 234 00:12:33,567 --> 00:12:35,534 Thanks. So you agree? 235 00:12:35,667 --> 00:12:37,033 You think you're really pretty? 236 00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:39,667 Oh, I don't know. 237 00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:42,966 You're an international student. That is so fetch. 238 00:12:43,101 --> 00:12:44,201 What is "fetch"? 239 00:12:44,333 --> 00:12:47,134 It's like slang from an old movie. 240 00:12:47,268 --> 00:12:50,268 Juno, I think. 241 00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:51,634 Have you ever touched a tiger? 242 00:12:51,766 --> 00:12:54,268 Uh, no, those aren't indigenous to Kenya. 243 00:12:54,400 --> 00:12:56,900 'Cause that's one of my life goals. 244 00:12:57,034 --> 00:12:59,300 To not touch a tiger. 245 00:12:59,433 --> 00:13:01,400 Hey, new girl! You want to see a trick? 246 00:13:01,534 --> 00:13:02,866 I can guess any girl's bra size. 247 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,000 All you got to do is jump one time. 248 00:13:05,134 --> 00:13:07,134 Ew, Jason! Do me. 249 00:13:07,268 --> 00:13:08,634 Oh, my God, Jason. 250 00:13:08,766 --> 00:13:11,634 You do not come to a party at my house with Gretchen 251 00:13:11,766 --> 00:13:13,500 and then skeeze on the new girl right in front of me. 252 00:13:13,634 --> 00:13:15,534 Do you want to have sex with him? 253 00:13:15,667 --> 00:13:17,966 Oh, uh... no, thank you. 254 00:13:18,101 --> 00:13:19,201 Okay, then it's settled. 255 00:13:19,333 --> 00:13:20,467 Jason, no one thinks you're funny. 256 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:21,733 Okay? And this thing you're doing 257 00:13:21,866 --> 00:13:23,201 where you lower your voice when you talk 258 00:13:23,333 --> 00:13:24,534 is making people really sad. 259 00:13:24,667 --> 00:13:26,534 Excuse me, anyone who would like Jason Weems 260 00:13:26,667 --> 00:13:28,534 to go back to his normal speaking voice, 261 00:13:28,667 --> 00:13:29,800 please raise your hand. 262 00:13:34,101 --> 00:13:35,433 Yeah. 263 00:13:35,933 --> 00:13:37,101 Bitch. 264 00:13:37,234 --> 00:13:38,567 Wow. 265 00:13:38,699 --> 00:13:40,833 You're really gonna get noticed around here. 266 00:13:41,534 --> 00:13:42,866 We should help you. 267 00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:46,333 Can you give us some privacy for a sec? 268 00:13:46,467 --> 00:13:48,699 Oh. Yeah, sure. 269 00:13:52,234 --> 00:13:54,534 I have your lunch! 270 00:13:55,733 --> 00:13:57,433 All right. 271 00:13:57,567 --> 00:13:59,534 So, we never really do this, but... 272 00:13:59,666 --> 00:14:01,101 ...you're invited to eat lunch with us 273 00:14:01,234 --> 00:14:03,101 for the rest of the week. Oh. Um... 274 00:14:03,234 --> 00:14:05,833 That's okay. On Wednesdays, we wear pink. 275 00:14:08,733 --> 00:14:10,567 They want me to have lunch with them all week. 276 00:14:10,699 --> 00:14:12,400 That is tits! 277 00:14:12,534 --> 00:14:13,900 She means "that's great." 278 00:14:14,034 --> 00:14:15,933 I don't really get why you guys hate them so much. 279 00:14:16,067 --> 00:14:18,201 Regina seems kind of cool. No, no... 280 00:14:18,333 --> 00:14:19,766 Regina George is not cool. 281 00:14:19,900 --> 00:14:21,666 She's a scum-sucking life ruiner. 282 00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:24,367 Janis hates Regina because when we were in sixth grade, 283 00:14:24,500 --> 00:14:26,699 she told everybody that she was-- Hey, Damian! 284 00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:27,766 What? 285 00:14:27,900 --> 00:14:28,699 Shall we not? 286 00:14:28,833 --> 00:14:30,234 I am providing context. 287 00:14:30,367 --> 00:14:31,367 Caddy? 288 00:14:31,500 --> 00:14:33,201 You should have lunch with them 289 00:14:33,333 --> 00:14:35,134 and then report back and tell us 290 00:14:35,268 --> 00:14:37,268 every stupid, moronic thing they said. 291 00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:39,800 Spy on them? That's bad. 292 00:14:39,934 --> 00:14:41,467 No! Look at us. 293 00:14:42,500 --> 00:14:45,067 Would we ever ask you to do something bad? 294 00:14:45,201 --> 00:14:46,900 Uh... 295 00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:50,833 Okay. Yes! 296 00:14:50,967 --> 00:14:53,067 Do you have a pink shirt I can borrow? 297 00:14:53,201 --> 00:14:55,201 No! Yes! What shade? 298 00:14:55,333 --> 00:14:57,268 Welcome to A.P. Calculus. 299 00:14:57,400 --> 00:15:02,666 Congratulations. You know more math than 85% of Americans. 300 00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:05,934 But you will not rest on your laurels this year. 301 00:15:06,067 --> 00:15:08,268 I plan to push you. 302 00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:09,567 So let's get started. 303 00:15:09,699 --> 00:15:12,699 Chapter One, "Limits and Their Properties." 304 00:15:12,833 --> 00:15:14,300 What the heck are limits, you say? 305 00:15:14,433 --> 00:15:15,733 If I write out the equation, 306 00:15:15,866 --> 00:15:18,766 "The limit as x approaches two of ," 307 00:15:18,901 --> 00:15:20,666 the function is what we're taking the limit of. 308 00:15:20,800 --> 00:15:22,567 I don't expect you to know how to do this yet. 309 00:15:22,699 --> 00:15:24,067 The limit equals three. 310 00:15:24,567 --> 00:15:26,101 That's right. 311 00:15:26,234 --> 00:15:27,467 Let's try another one. 312 00:15:27,599 --> 00:15:29,333 Find the value of k 313 00:15:29,467 --> 00:15:31,500 for which the following limit exists. 314 00:15:31,633 --> 00:15:34,034 K equals negative three. Damn, girl! 315 00:15:35,866 --> 00:15:37,067 Wow. 316 00:15:38,067 --> 00:15:40,633 Are you trying to make the rest of us feel dumb? 317 00:15:40,766 --> 00:15:43,800 No, I... I'm not trying to. It's just, uh, happening. 318 00:15:43,934 --> 00:15:48,001 Oh, okay, it's like that. All right, um, well... 319 00:15:49,034 --> 00:15:50,534 challenge accepted. 320 00:15:57,867 --> 00:16:00,001 ♪ When I was nine ♪ 321 00:16:00,134 --> 00:16:01,467 ♪ I fell in love ♪ 322 00:16:01,599 --> 00:16:03,566 ♪ This Peace Corps guy ♪ 323 00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:07,633 ♪ I waited hours Inside his tent with flowers ♪ 324 00:16:07,766 --> 00:16:10,268 ♪ Which made him laugh Which made me cry ♪ 325 00:16:10,400 --> 00:16:11,800 ♪ By 13 I gave up trying ♪ 326 00:16:11,934 --> 00:16:15,101 ♪ I decided I would be A mathematician ♪ 327 00:16:15,234 --> 00:16:16,599 ♪ 'Cause math is real ♪ 328 00:16:16,733 --> 00:16:18,566 ♪ I memorized a lot of pi ♪ 329 00:16:18,699 --> 00:16:21,067 ♪ Because addition And subtraction and division ♪ 330 00:16:21,201 --> 00:16:24,666 ♪ Would never make me feel So stupid with love ♪ 331 00:16:24,800 --> 00:16:26,201 ♪ I didn't get it ♪ 332 00:16:26,333 --> 00:16:29,134 ♪ I didn't get it, somehow ♪ 333 00:16:29,268 --> 00:16:32,168 ♪ Smart with math But stupid with love ♪ 334 00:16:32,300 --> 00:16:36,633 ♪ I didn't get it I didn't get it till now ♪ 335 00:16:37,699 --> 00:16:40,633 ♪ Mm, mm, mm ♪ 336 00:16:41,901 --> 00:16:44,533 ♪ So thank you, math For being there ♪ 337 00:16:44,666 --> 00:16:46,934 ♪ To bring me joy ♪ 338 00:16:48,168 --> 00:16:49,766 ♪ And thank you, math ♪ 339 00:16:49,901 --> 00:16:52,901 ♪ 'Cause now you've brought me This cute boy ♪ 340 00:16:53,034 --> 00:16:55,134 ♪ He's like someone from TV ♪ 341 00:16:55,268 --> 00:16:58,400 ♪ He's like that guy Who gives out roses To those women ♪ 342 00:16:58,533 --> 00:17:00,001 ♪ His clothes, his grooming ♪ 343 00:17:00,134 --> 00:17:02,134 ♪ And he's a foot away from me ♪ 344 00:17:02,268 --> 00:17:04,599 ♪ With swoopy hair And shiny eyes That I could swim in ♪ 345 00:17:04,733 --> 00:17:06,234 ♪ He's live and in the room! ♪ 346 00:17:12,834 --> 00:17:16,201 ♪ And I'm stupid with love I want to get it ♪ 347 00:17:16,333 --> 00:17:19,533 ♪ I want to get it, but how? ♪ 348 00:17:19,666 --> 00:17:22,767 ♪ Smart with math But stupid with love ♪ 349 00:17:22,901 --> 00:17:26,967 ♪ I want to get it I didn't get it till now ♪ 350 00:17:35,867 --> 00:17:38,834 ♪ I'm astounded and nonplussed ♪ 351 00:17:38,967 --> 00:17:41,801 ♪ I am filled with calcu-lust ♪ 352 00:17:41,934 --> 00:17:45,168 ♪ Does this guy work out? He must ♪ 353 00:17:45,300 --> 00:17:48,034 ♪ All sweaty at the gym ♪ 354 00:17:48,168 --> 00:17:51,101 ♪ Could that image Be more hot? ♪ 355 00:17:51,234 --> 00:17:54,101 ♪ Let me just enjoy That thought ♪ 356 00:17:54,234 --> 00:17:57,300 ♪ School was rough But now it's not ♪ 357 00:17:57,432 --> 00:17:59,533 ♪ 'Cause now there's him ♪ 358 00:17:59,666 --> 00:18:02,901 ♪ Stupid with love I didn't get it ♪ 359 00:18:03,034 --> 00:18:06,001 ♪ I didn't get it, somehow ♪ 360 00:18:06,134 --> 00:18:09,101 ♪ Smart with math But stupid with love ♪ 361 00:18:09,234 --> 00:18:12,566 ♪ I didn't get it I didn't get it till now ♪ 362 00:18:19,367 --> 00:18:20,234 I'm okay. 363 00:18:26,466 --> 00:18:29,134 Mom, you can't pick me up like this. 364 00:18:29,268 --> 00:18:30,633 It's embarrassing. 365 00:18:33,168 --> 00:18:34,867 You can't wear a tank top two days in a row 366 00:18:35,001 --> 00:18:38,234 and you can only wear your hair in a ponytail once a week. 367 00:18:38,367 --> 00:18:39,734 So I guess you've chosen today. 368 00:18:39,867 --> 00:18:43,734 Oh! And we only wear sweats or track pants on Fridays. 369 00:18:43,867 --> 00:18:45,599 If you break any of these rules, 370 00:18:45,734 --> 00:18:46,834 you can't sit with us. 371 00:18:46,967 --> 00:18:48,734 I mean, not just you, like, any of us. 372 00:18:48,867 --> 00:18:50,466 Like if I wore sweatpants today, 373 00:18:50,599 --> 00:18:51,801 I'd have to go sit over there... 374 00:18:51,934 --> 00:18:53,834 ...with the Art Freaks. 375 00:18:56,432 --> 00:18:57,734 That seems fair. 376 00:18:57,867 --> 00:19:00,366 120 calories and 48 calories from fat. 377 00:19:00,499 --> 00:19:01,432 What percent is that? 378 00:19:01,566 --> 00:19:04,001 Um, 48 into 120? 379 00:19:04,134 --> 00:19:05,901 There's no way of knowing. 380 00:19:06,801 --> 00:19:08,234 It's 40%. 381 00:19:08,366 --> 00:19:09,667 42 over 120 382 00:19:09,801 --> 00:19:11,967 equals x over 100, and then you cross-multiply 383 00:19:12,101 --> 00:19:13,700 to get the value of x. 384 00:19:14,234 --> 00:19:15,867 Hmm. 385 00:19:16,001 --> 00:19:17,934 Whatever. Um, I'm getting cheese fries. 386 00:19:23,934 --> 00:19:26,934 So, have you seen any guys you think are cute yet? 387 00:19:28,234 --> 00:19:32,466 Oh, um, well, actually, there's this one guy in my Calculus class. 388 00:19:32,599 --> 00:19:36,300 Ooh, a senior! Who is it? Uh, Aaron Samuels. 389 00:19:36,432 --> 00:19:39,934 You can't like Aaron Samuels! That is Regina's ex-boyfriend! No. No. Bad. Bad. Danger. 390 00:19:41,101 --> 00:19:44,001 Wait. I thought she dumped him for Shane Oman. 391 00:19:44,134 --> 00:19:45,300 Irregardless! 392 00:19:45,432 --> 00:19:46,667 Ex-boyfriends are off-limits for friends. 393 00:19:46,801 --> 00:19:48,700 That's just, like, the rules of feminism! 394 00:19:52,901 --> 00:19:53,801 Don't worry. 395 00:19:53,934 --> 00:19:56,366 I will never tell Regina what you said. 396 00:19:56,499 --> 00:19:58,067 I am very trustworthy. 397 00:19:58,201 --> 00:20:00,901 Karen's had sex with 11 people and I've never told anyone. 398 00:20:02,399 --> 00:20:03,432 Yo, Golf Bird. 399 00:20:03,566 --> 00:20:05,634 Those fractions were tight. What? 400 00:20:05,767 --> 00:20:08,867 "Caddy Heron." "Golf Bird." 401 00:20:09,001 --> 00:20:10,634 I don't like it. I don't get it. 402 00:20:10,767 --> 00:20:13,934 I'm Kevin Ganatra. I'm from your Calc class. 403 00:20:15,067 --> 00:20:16,600 I sit diagonally from you. 404 00:20:16,734 --> 00:20:18,767 I'm also captain of the North Shore Mathletes. 405 00:20:18,901 --> 00:20:22,700 We're a very chill, dope, extracurricular option. 406 00:20:22,834 --> 00:20:24,366 You know, serve your college rezzy 407 00:20:24,499 --> 00:20:26,466 and your thirst for knolly. Don't say "knolly." 408 00:20:26,600 --> 00:20:28,600 Also Ms. Norbury says we get twice as much funding 409 00:20:28,734 --> 00:20:30,801 if we had a girl on the team, so think about joining, 410 00:20:30,934 --> 00:20:32,600 because we'd love to get jackets. 411 00:20:32,734 --> 00:20:34,533 Okay, yeah, sure. Where do I... 412 00:20:34,667 --> 00:20:35,700 No, no, you cannot join Mathletes. 413 00:20:35,834 --> 00:20:37,134 That is, like, socially ruinous! 414 00:20:37,267 --> 00:20:40,067 Ew, no. Why is he by our table? 415 00:20:40,201 --> 00:20:41,466 I can hear you, by the way. 416 00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:43,134 Can you hear me now? 417 00:20:43,267 --> 00:20:45,299 Bye. 418 00:20:45,432 --> 00:20:49,001 Uh, anyways, uh, just take my card in case you change your mind? 419 00:20:55,533 --> 00:20:58,168 God, you are so lucky you have us to guide you. 420 00:20:58,299 --> 00:21:00,332 What are you doing after school today? 421 00:21:00,466 --> 00:21:02,134 I want to give you some shoes. 422 00:21:04,934 --> 00:21:06,168 What kind of shoes? 423 00:21:06,299 --> 00:21:09,432 I have no idea. I guess, um, something fancier than these? 424 00:21:09,867 --> 00:21:11,567 She's so rude! 425 00:21:11,700 --> 00:21:14,267 I mean, maybe she's just being generous. 426 00:21:14,399 --> 00:21:16,432 Maybe we can have a commensal relationship. 427 00:21:16,567 --> 00:21:18,700 What is that? I want one. 428 00:21:18,834 --> 00:21:22,499 So, in nature, okay, so lions, 429 00:21:22,634 --> 00:21:24,399 they're the apex predators, right? 430 00:21:24,534 --> 00:21:25,534 They're the top of the food chain. 431 00:21:25,667 --> 00:21:28,034 They can kill anything they want. 432 00:21:28,168 --> 00:21:30,001 But if you're a hyena, well, 433 00:21:30,134 --> 00:21:33,267 then you follow them around and you eat the carcasses that they leave behind. 434 00:21:33,399 --> 00:21:35,001 Whoa. Gretchen Wieners is a hyena. 435 00:21:35,134 --> 00:21:36,067 Got it. 436 00:21:36,201 --> 00:21:37,867 No, I did not say that. 437 00:21:38,001 --> 00:21:40,267 I'm just saying, if you're on Regina's good side... 438 00:21:40,399 --> 00:21:41,634 Whoa, Caddy! No, no, no. 439 00:21:41,767 --> 00:21:43,801 Regina George does not have a good side, okay? 440 00:21:43,934 --> 00:21:45,700 If you go over to her house today... 441 00:21:45,834 --> 00:21:47,001 I am not joking, 442 00:21:47,934 --> 00:21:49,534 be careful. 443 00:22:00,001 --> 00:22:01,901 ♪ Don't be fooled by the pink ♪ 444 00:22:02,034 --> 00:22:03,901 ♪ She is not playing dolls ♪ 445 00:22:04,034 --> 00:22:07,867 ♪ She is stalking the halls For the thrill of the kill ♪ 446 00:22:08,001 --> 00:22:11,867 ♪ Every person in school Is aware of her stare ♪ 447 00:22:12,001 --> 00:22:15,867 ♪ When she tosses her hair They go perfectly still ♪ 448 00:22:16,001 --> 00:22:19,867 ♪ All their eyes say "Don't attack me" ♪ 449 00:22:20,001 --> 00:22:23,867 ♪ Watch them sweat And pant and shake ♪ 450 00:22:24,001 --> 00:22:28,366 ♪ Every food chain Has its acme ♪ 451 00:22:28,500 --> 00:22:31,200 ♪ Regina George eats steak ♪ 452 00:22:31,332 --> 00:22:36,001 ♪ She's the queen of beasts She can smell your fear ♪ 453 00:22:36,134 --> 00:22:39,834 ♪ In this biosphere She's the apex predator ♪ 454 00:22:39,967 --> 00:22:41,901 ♪ Like a lioness ♪ 455 00:22:42,034 --> 00:22:45,700 ♪ Only with less fur Do not mess with her ♪ 456 00:22:45,834 --> 00:22:47,934 ♪ She's the apex predator ♪ 457 00:22:50,500 --> 00:22:53,332 Jason is crotch-sitting Taylor Wedell. 458 00:22:54,133 --> 00:22:56,034 Absolutely not. 459 00:22:56,167 --> 00:22:57,767 ♪ At the watering hole ♪ 460 00:22:57,901 --> 00:22:59,634 ♪ See the girls Who weren't nice ♪ 461 00:22:59,767 --> 00:23:02,001 ♪ Have to scatter like mice ♪ 462 00:23:02,133 --> 00:23:04,001 ♪ From a jungle cat ♪ 463 00:23:04,133 --> 00:23:07,734 ♪ And though Janis is great She does not have this power ♪ 464 00:23:07,867 --> 00:23:10,167 ♪ People literally cower ♪ 465 00:23:10,299 --> 00:23:11,667 ♪ Janis can't do that ♪ 466 00:23:11,801 --> 00:23:15,867 ♪ See her mark her territory ♪ 467 00:23:16,001 --> 00:23:19,101 ♪ As they follow in her train ♪ 468 00:23:20,133 --> 00:23:24,167 ♪ They were victims In their stories ♪ 469 00:23:24,299 --> 00:23:27,834 ♪ Now they shake their mane ♪ 470 00:23:27,967 --> 00:23:31,634 ♪ She's the queen of beasts And you're in her pride ♪ 471 00:23:31,767 --> 00:23:33,700 ♪ You have hitched a ride ♪ 472 00:23:33,834 --> 00:23:35,934 ♪ With the apex predator ♪ 473 00:23:36,067 --> 00:23:39,934 ♪ And it's kind of fun When she bares her claws ♪ 474 00:23:40,067 --> 00:23:41,767 ♪ You think You're safe because ♪ 475 00:23:41,901 --> 00:23:43,567 ♪ You're with The apex predator ♪ 476 00:23:43,700 --> 00:23:45,767 Do you think she'll be mad if I like Aaron? 477 00:23:45,901 --> 00:23:48,233 Samuels? Are you unwell? You can't like Aaron Samuels! 478 00:23:48,366 --> 00:23:49,299 Okay, okay! 479 00:23:49,433 --> 00:23:51,634 I'll be careful. I promise. 480 00:23:54,001 --> 00:23:57,600 ♪ Do not think You'll be protected ♪ 481 00:23:57,734 --> 00:24:01,500 ♪ By your new exotic pet ♪ 482 00:24:01,634 --> 00:24:05,801 ♪ Not a chance If she suspected ♪ 483 00:24:05,934 --> 00:24:09,400 ♪ You were any kind Of reproductive threat ♪ 484 00:24:09,534 --> 00:24:11,467 ♪ But she doesn't know yet ♪ 485 00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:13,767 ♪ She doesn't know yet! ♪ 486 00:24:13,901 --> 00:24:17,834 ♪ She's the queen of beasts At this beastly school ♪ 487 00:24:17,967 --> 00:24:21,934 ♪ Got to keep things cool With the apex predator! ♪ 488 00:24:31,801 --> 00:24:32,867 Get in, loser. 489 00:24:35,901 --> 00:24:38,001 ♪ With the apex predator! ♪ 490 00:24:38,133 --> 00:24:42,233 ♪ Will she braid your hair? Will she eat your heart? ♪ 491 00:24:42,367 --> 00:24:46,267 ♪ How can you outsmart ♪ 492 00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:48,367 ♪ The apex predator? ♪ 493 00:24:50,500 --> 00:24:51,867 ♪ The apex predator? ♪ 494 00:24:52,001 --> 00:24:54,333 ♪ The apex predator! ♪ 495 00:24:55,100 --> 00:24:58,467 You guys! Hey... 496 00:24:59,233 --> 00:25:01,801 Happy hump day, besties! 497 00:25:01,934 --> 00:25:04,700 Hi, Mrs. George. 498 00:25:04,834 --> 00:25:06,100 This is Cady. 499 00:25:06,233 --> 00:25:07,867 I just moved here. From Kenya. 500 00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:12,267 Welcome, Cady from Kenya. 501 00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:16,367 We haven't had any new meat in our little lady taco in so long. 502 00:25:16,500 --> 00:25:17,567 Mom, go make snacks. 503 00:25:17,700 --> 00:25:19,433 For sure. For sure, Regina, yeah. 504 00:25:19,567 --> 00:25:21,167 Thank you so much, Mrs. George. 505 00:25:21,300 --> 00:25:22,967 You have a beautiful mansion. 506 00:25:23,100 --> 00:25:26,767 Just slay, queens. Slay like no one's watching. 507 00:25:26,901 --> 00:25:29,901 But everybody's watching. Because you're gorgeous! 508 00:25:34,834 --> 00:25:36,834 Wow, your room is really nice. 509 00:25:36,966 --> 00:25:40,767 Thanks. It used to be my parents', but I made them trade me. 510 00:25:48,567 --> 00:25:51,767 Cady! I made you a Spotify playlist 511 00:25:51,901 --> 00:25:53,966 to help you catch up on culture. 512 00:25:54,100 --> 00:25:57,400 Karen, come here. I want to fix your eyebrows. 513 00:25:57,534 --> 00:25:58,500 Can I still have two? 514 00:25:58,634 --> 00:26:01,100 Gretchen, move. Sorry. 515 00:26:01,233 --> 00:26:03,901 God, my hips are so wide. 516 00:26:04,033 --> 00:26:05,433 God, my pores are huge! 517 00:26:05,567 --> 00:26:07,700 I want skin like Cady's. 518 00:26:08,567 --> 00:26:10,801 My B.O. smells like crayons. 519 00:26:13,534 --> 00:26:16,268 Um, me, too! I'm ugly, too. 520 00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:19,033 Oh, my God, I love her. She's like a Martian. 521 00:26:19,167 --> 00:26:20,966 Who's hungry? 522 00:26:21,100 --> 00:26:22,333 Now, Cady, 523 00:26:22,467 --> 00:26:25,966 this is a very American snack called guac. 524 00:26:26,100 --> 00:26:28,268 Is it okay or are you vegan? 525 00:26:28,433 --> 00:26:30,300 Oh, no, I'm an omnivore. 526 00:26:30,433 --> 00:26:32,333 Yum-yum-yum. Okay, come here! 527 00:26:32,467 --> 00:26:35,033 I need you to tell me everything. 528 00:26:35,167 --> 00:26:38,300 Have you seen any boys that you think are cute yet? 529 00:26:38,433 --> 00:26:41,767 Oh. Uh, well, I... 530 00:26:41,900 --> 00:26:43,066 No. 531 00:26:43,201 --> 00:26:45,433 Well, don't worry. It's just a matter of time. 532 00:26:45,567 --> 00:26:49,467 You know, I always say that this school district has the highest taxes, 533 00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:51,966 but the hottest boys. That's disgusting. 534 00:26:52,100 --> 00:26:54,567 Oh, Regina! You're never gonna believe what I found 535 00:26:54,700 --> 00:26:56,100 in your closet this morning. 536 00:26:56,234 --> 00:26:57,567 Why were you in my closet? 537 00:26:57,700 --> 00:26:59,467 Because I'm doing that Japanese organizing thing 538 00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:02,201 where you take a little nap in the closet. 539 00:27:03,734 --> 00:27:06,734 I found your Burn Book! 540 00:27:06,867 --> 00:27:09,867 Cady, this is just, like, the funniest thing 541 00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:11,033 that the girls used to do. 542 00:27:11,167 --> 00:27:12,600 - Please leave. - You got it, baby. 543 00:27:12,734 --> 00:27:14,433 But, girls, I'm gonna be right downstairs 544 00:27:14,567 --> 00:27:16,133 if you need to talk to me about anything. 545 00:27:16,268 --> 00:27:20,367 I mean it. Deep stuff or boy troubles or blackheads 546 00:27:20,500 --> 00:27:22,634 or alcohol poisoning. 547 00:27:22,767 --> 00:27:24,966 You know, I have been through it all. 548 00:27:25,100 --> 00:27:27,500 Honey, I am not a regular mom. 549 00:27:27,634 --> 00:27:30,467 I'm @coolmom with six O's. 550 00:27:30,600 --> 00:27:32,600 Hashtag AgingHotly. Hashtag... 551 00:27:32,734 --> 00:27:34,634 - Get out. - Okay. 552 00:27:34,767 --> 00:27:37,000 Girls, just have so much fun. 553 00:27:37,133 --> 00:27:41,801 Remember, these are the best days of your life. 554 00:27:42,734 --> 00:27:45,000 It does not get better. 555 00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:51,333 I remember this. It was the week they took all of our phones away. 556 00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:56,600 "Trang Pham is a grotsky little byotch." 557 00:27:56,734 --> 00:27:58,168 Still true. 558 00:27:58,300 --> 00:28:01,201 "Dawn Schweitzer is a horny shrimp." 559 00:28:01,333 --> 00:28:02,767 Well, she's taller now. 560 00:28:02,900 --> 00:28:06,767 Oh, my God. "Janis 'Imi'ike, Pyro-Lez." 561 00:28:06,900 --> 00:28:08,134 I forgot about that. 562 00:28:08,268 --> 00:28:09,667 Oh, my God, she is so weird. 563 00:28:09,801 --> 00:28:11,667 She is? She's in my homeroom. 564 00:28:11,801 --> 00:28:14,700 Oh, well, watch out, 'cause she's violent. 565 00:28:14,833 --> 00:28:16,866 Yeah, people think she's really good at art, 566 00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:19,000 but it's just 'cause she had to do art therapy. 567 00:28:19,134 --> 00:28:21,767 Yeah, Regina tried to be friends with her in middle school. 568 00:28:21,900 --> 00:28:23,400 Oh, my God, she was obsessed with me. 569 00:28:23,534 --> 00:28:25,933 And then when I got my first boyfriend, Kyle, 570 00:28:26,066 --> 00:28:28,066 she lit my backpack on fire. 571 00:28:29,534 --> 00:28:30,734 Who's that? 572 00:28:30,866 --> 00:28:33,033 Mmm... That's that kid Damian. 573 00:28:33,168 --> 00:28:35,800 Oh, yeah, he's almost too gay to function. 574 00:28:37,300 --> 00:28:39,333 No, I didn't... I didn't mean that in a bad way. 575 00:28:39,467 --> 00:28:41,634 No, that's funny. Put that in there. 576 00:28:41,767 --> 00:28:42,833 Um... 577 00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:45,400 No, I don't... Oh! No, no. 578 00:28:45,534 --> 00:28:47,700 Don't worry, Cady, we only write stuff about randos in here. 579 00:28:47,833 --> 00:28:51,101 Friends are, like, very deserving of respect. 580 00:28:51,234 --> 00:28:53,800 Gretchen... she gets it. 581 00:28:54,367 --> 00:28:55,634 Go find the shoes. 582 00:28:57,534 --> 00:28:59,667 The shoes we're giving to Cady. 583 00:28:59,800 --> 00:29:03,500 Oh, my God, you are literally being so annoying. 584 00:29:05,101 --> 00:29:06,000 Sorry. 585 00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:16,900 Are you okay? 586 00:29:17,033 --> 00:29:18,966 No... uh, totally. 587 00:29:19,101 --> 00:29:20,700 Regina's just joking. 588 00:29:20,833 --> 00:29:22,833 These are cute. Try 'em. 589 00:29:24,833 --> 00:29:27,333 Once I processed that Regina's love language is anger, 590 00:29:27,467 --> 00:29:28,733 it's been much... 591 00:29:30,034 --> 00:29:32,067 Aw. 592 00:29:32,201 --> 00:29:35,467 It's the music box I gave Regina that my abuelito gave me. 593 00:29:44,866 --> 00:29:47,500 ♪ Tell me What's wrong with me ♪ 594 00:29:47,634 --> 00:29:50,467 ♪ My body, face, my hair ♪ 595 00:29:51,300 --> 00:29:54,766 ♪ Tell me all my many faults ♪ 596 00:29:54,900 --> 00:29:56,667 ♪ Tell me like you care ♪ 597 00:29:56,800 --> 00:29:59,933 ♪ When we both Know you're cruel ♪ 598 00:30:00,067 --> 00:30:03,400 ♪ And we both know You're right ♪ 599 00:30:03,534 --> 00:30:06,600 ♪ I could listen to you ♪ 600 00:30:06,733 --> 00:30:09,699 ♪ Like a fool all night ♪ 601 00:30:09,833 --> 00:30:12,766 ♪ What's wrong with me? ♪ 602 00:30:12,900 --> 00:30:15,800 ♪ How I speak? How I dress? ♪ 603 00:30:15,933 --> 00:30:19,433 ♪ What's wrong with me? ♪ 604 00:30:19,567 --> 00:30:22,900 ♪ You keep me guessing ♪ 605 00:30:23,034 --> 00:30:28,201 ♪ Mama called me "beautiful" Don't believe her anymore ♪ 606 00:30:28,333 --> 00:30:31,634 ♪ Now I'm listening to you ♪ 607 00:30:31,766 --> 00:30:34,900 ♪ What do I do that for? ♪ 608 00:30:35,034 --> 00:30:41,333 ♪ Please don't ignore me ♪ 609 00:30:46,300 --> 00:30:47,367 Gretchen! 610 00:30:47,500 --> 00:30:49,067 What are you doing in there? 611 00:30:49,201 --> 00:30:50,500 I'm... I'm gonna go. 612 00:30:50,634 --> 00:30:52,967 Yep. Be right there! 613 00:30:57,800 --> 00:30:59,866 ♪ What's wrong with me? What can I do? ♪ 614 00:31:00,001 --> 00:31:02,666 ♪ What's wrong with me? Could it be you? ♪ 615 00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:04,333 ♪ It's probably me ♪ 616 00:31:04,467 --> 00:31:07,201 ♪ See that? You see? ♪ 617 00:31:07,333 --> 00:31:10,333 ♪ What's wrong with me? ♪ 618 00:31:23,666 --> 00:31:26,001 They have this book, this "Burn Book," 619 00:31:26,134 --> 00:31:28,300 where they write mean things about girls in our grade. 620 00:31:28,433 --> 00:31:30,733 Ooh, ooh! What does it say about me? 621 00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:33,666 Um... you're not in it. 622 00:31:34,101 --> 00:31:35,333 Those bitches! 623 00:31:35,467 --> 00:31:37,001 What is this, by the way? It's terrible. 624 00:31:37,134 --> 00:31:38,567 Oh, it's a Kälteen bar. 625 00:31:38,699 --> 00:31:40,733 Here, my mom used to give them to elderly people in Kapedo 626 00:31:40,866 --> 00:31:43,168 to help them gain weight. Mmm. 627 00:31:43,300 --> 00:31:44,833 I can feel it working. 628 00:31:44,967 --> 00:31:47,400 We should, like, crush this up and put it in Regina's food! 629 00:31:47,534 --> 00:31:49,001 What? Oh. 630 00:31:49,134 --> 00:31:50,433 No. No, no. 631 00:31:50,567 --> 00:31:52,333 I will keep having lunch with them, that's it. 632 00:31:52,467 --> 00:31:55,467 Also, we feel bad we yelled at you 633 00:31:55,599 --> 00:31:57,234 about liking Aaron. 634 00:31:57,367 --> 00:31:59,500 You should go for what you want. 635 00:31:59,633 --> 00:32:01,766 Hetero allyship. Oh, okay. 636 00:32:01,901 --> 00:32:04,599 It's so dumb. I only ever see him in Calc anyway. 637 00:32:04,733 --> 00:32:08,367 Oh. You're definitely safe in Calc. 638 00:32:08,500 --> 00:32:10,567 Regina will never set foot in there. 639 00:32:23,733 --> 00:32:25,901 New shoes? Uh, yeah. 640 00:32:26,034 --> 00:32:27,467 Regina gave them to me. 641 00:32:27,599 --> 00:32:30,001 Huh. I didn't know you guys were friends. 642 00:32:30,134 --> 00:32:32,067 Okay, let's get back into it. 643 00:32:32,201 --> 00:32:33,633 Continuity. Removable discont... 644 00:32:33,766 --> 00:32:35,400 Cady? Eyes up front, please. 645 00:32:36,500 --> 00:32:38,599 Let's get back into where we were Thursday. 646 00:32:38,733 --> 00:32:40,967 Who was awake Thursday? Who was still awake? 647 00:32:42,534 --> 00:32:44,300 I like your jacket. 648 00:32:44,433 --> 00:32:45,599 Thanks, I made it. 649 00:32:45,733 --> 00:32:47,500 But why do you sew on top of your drawings? 650 00:32:47,633 --> 00:32:50,400 It's... like the drawings are facts 651 00:32:50,533 --> 00:32:51,934 and the threads are feelings. 652 00:32:52,067 --> 00:32:54,367 It's so cool. 653 00:32:56,633 --> 00:32:59,333 So, you talk to your man yet? 654 00:33:01,101 --> 00:33:02,901 I mean, I don't even know what to say to him. 655 00:33:03,034 --> 00:33:06,201 I always come off sounding like a lunatic. 656 00:33:06,333 --> 00:33:08,467 Do you like gum? Sure. 657 00:33:09,500 --> 00:33:11,967 Oh, I don't have any. I was just... 658 00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:20,599 What? Why did you say that? 659 00:33:20,733 --> 00:33:24,400 Maybe just try to have one successful interaction per day? 660 00:33:27,201 --> 00:33:29,134 I like your shirt. Thanks. 661 00:33:29,268 --> 00:33:31,834 It smells like sausage from the last time I wore it. 662 00:33:35,234 --> 00:33:36,801 Dear God, woman. 663 00:33:36,934 --> 00:33:40,599 Have you successfully been a functioning human being even once? 664 00:33:42,001 --> 00:33:45,499 On October 3rd, he asked me what day it was. 665 00:33:45,633 --> 00:33:48,268 What day is it? It's October 3rd. 666 00:33:48,400 --> 00:33:52,300 ♪ October 3rd ♪ 667 00:33:52,433 --> 00:33:54,333 That was two weeks ago. 668 00:33:55,433 --> 00:33:56,733 But today I kind of... 669 00:33:56,867 --> 00:33:58,201 I don't know, I tried something 670 00:33:58,333 --> 00:34:01,400 and it just came to me instinctively. 671 00:34:03,067 --> 00:34:04,367 I said I was lost. 672 00:34:04,499 --> 00:34:07,400 I'm totally lost. Can you help me? 673 00:34:08,201 --> 00:34:09,499 But I wasn't lost. 674 00:34:09,633 --> 00:34:11,101 I knew exactly what Ms. Norbury was talking about. 675 00:34:11,234 --> 00:34:14,801 It's the derivative of the natural log function. 676 00:34:14,934 --> 00:34:17,867 You just take the reciprocal of the ln. 677 00:34:19,433 --> 00:34:20,533 Thanks. 678 00:34:21,533 --> 00:34:23,767 You're so smart. 679 00:34:25,867 --> 00:34:26,867 He was wrong. 680 00:34:27,001 --> 00:34:28,433 Wait, wait. Hold up. 681 00:34:28,566 --> 00:34:30,400 Guys, pause! Oh. 682 00:34:33,333 --> 00:34:34,867 You pretended to be dumb 683 00:34:35,001 --> 00:34:37,499 so you could keep talking to a guy? 684 00:34:37,633 --> 00:34:40,400 Uh... Yeah. It worked. 685 00:34:40,533 --> 00:34:42,268 'Cause that shit always works, Caddy. 686 00:34:42,400 --> 00:34:43,767 It doesn't mean that it's not evil. 687 00:34:43,901 --> 00:34:47,034 Fracking "works." Red-lining "works." 688 00:34:47,168 --> 00:34:48,834 Gasoline and rags... 689 00:34:48,967 --> 00:34:51,367 Aren't you worried Regina will eat your face if she finds out? 690 00:34:51,499 --> 00:34:53,001 No, she won't find out. 691 00:34:53,134 --> 00:34:56,699 It's just my little Calculus class secret. 692 00:34:56,834 --> 00:34:59,201 Oh, um... 693 00:34:59,333 --> 00:35:02,134 So its h prime of x equals five. 694 00:35:02,268 --> 00:35:04,101 You just forgot the Product Rule. 695 00:35:04,234 --> 00:35:06,001 I don't get any of this. 696 00:35:07,466 --> 00:35:08,432 Nice job, Cady. 697 00:35:08,566 --> 00:35:10,633 It sure seems like you get it. 698 00:35:16,001 --> 00:35:20,666 Hey, my friend Chris is, uh, having a Halloween party. 699 00:35:20,801 --> 00:35:22,234 Would you want to come to that? 700 00:35:22,399 --> 00:35:24,967 It's like a costume party. People get pretty into it. 701 00:35:25,101 --> 00:35:26,566 Grool. 702 00:35:26,700 --> 00:35:29,700 I meant to say "great," and then I started to say "cool." 703 00:35:29,834 --> 00:35:30,967 Okay. 704 00:35:31,734 --> 00:35:32,901 Grool. 705 00:35:38,399 --> 00:35:39,566 Hi. 706 00:35:39,700 --> 00:35:41,201 ♪ If I could change the world ♪ 707 00:35:41,333 --> 00:35:45,566 ♪ I'd make it Halloween ♪ 708 00:35:46,432 --> 00:35:49,268 ♪ Every single day ♪ 709 00:35:49,399 --> 00:35:52,667 ♪ And also have world peace ♪ 710 00:35:52,801 --> 00:35:55,767 ♪ Maybe world peace Should be first ♪ 711 00:35:55,901 --> 00:35:58,499 ♪ World peace And then Halloween ♪ 712 00:35:58,633 --> 00:36:00,366 Wait, let me start over. 713 00:36:03,333 --> 00:36:04,466 Hi. 714 00:36:04,599 --> 00:36:05,801 ♪ If I could change the world ♪ 715 00:36:05,934 --> 00:36:10,366 ♪ I'd make us have world peace ♪ 716 00:36:10,499 --> 00:36:14,300 ♪ And also Halloween ♪ 717 00:36:14,432 --> 00:36:16,667 ♪ Every single day ♪ 718 00:36:16,801 --> 00:36:18,168 ♪ On Halloween ♪ 719 00:36:18,300 --> 00:36:22,399 ♪ You can pretend To be someone else ♪ 720 00:36:22,533 --> 00:36:25,001 ♪ It's like the Internet ♪ 721 00:36:25,134 --> 00:36:31,201 ♪ Only in person And with candy ♪ 722 00:36:31,332 --> 00:36:34,268 Wait. Mama, use the back camera. 723 00:36:34,399 --> 00:36:37,700 It's prettier 'cause science. 724 00:36:37,834 --> 00:36:39,566 ♪ When you are The hot one ♪ 725 00:36:39,700 --> 00:36:41,201 ♪ It's a full-time gig ♪ 726 00:36:41,332 --> 00:36:44,268 ♪ Lookin' like what people Want to see ♪ 727 00:36:44,399 --> 00:36:48,101 ♪ Once a year I'm not I dress up and dream big ♪ 728 00:36:48,234 --> 00:36:50,466 ♪ Disguised as someone else Who is not me ♪ 729 00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:52,168 ♪ But is still hot! ♪ 730 00:36:52,299 --> 00:36:53,399 ♪ I can be ♪ 731 00:36:53,533 --> 00:36:55,867 ♪ Who I want to be and sexy! ♪ 732 00:36:56,001 --> 00:36:59,168 ♪ I can be Who I want to be and hot! ♪ 733 00:36:59,299 --> 00:37:02,967 ♪ Don't like who you are Then hit that costume shop ♪ 734 00:37:03,101 --> 00:37:06,767 ♪ Rock a new And different sexy look ♪ 735 00:37:06,901 --> 00:37:10,001 ♪ Why be so downhearted? Blast some trashy pop ♪ 736 00:37:10,134 --> 00:37:13,432 ♪ And drop it to this hot And sexy hook ♪ 737 00:37:13,566 --> 00:37:17,600 ♪ I can be Who I want to be and sexy! ♪ 738 00:37:17,734 --> 00:37:21,267 ♪ I can be Who I want to be and hot! ♪ 739 00:37:21,399 --> 00:37:24,366 ♪ Be somebody new ♪ 740 00:37:24,499 --> 00:37:28,499 ♪ Do a total transformation ♪ 741 00:37:28,634 --> 00:37:32,067 ♪ Animal or mineral, too ♪ 742 00:37:32,201 --> 00:37:36,134 ♪ Or even vegetation! ♪ 743 00:37:36,267 --> 00:37:37,734 I give you sexy corn. 744 00:37:37,867 --> 00:37:41,168 ♪ I can be who I want to be ♪ 745 00:37:41,299 --> 00:37:43,934 ♪ And sexy! ♪ 746 00:37:54,834 --> 00:37:56,466 Why are you dressed so scary? 747 00:37:56,600 --> 00:37:57,767 It's Halloween. 748 00:37:57,901 --> 00:37:59,466 Cady, if you don't dress slutty, 749 00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:01,534 that is slut-shaming us. 750 00:38:06,634 --> 00:38:10,101 Um, it's just, like, traditionally, 751 00:38:10,233 --> 00:38:11,700 girls had to be witches or clowns 752 00:38:11,834 --> 00:38:14,901 and we've worked really hard to progress past that. 753 00:38:15,034 --> 00:38:16,867 That makes sense. 754 00:38:19,233 --> 00:38:21,168 I'm gonna go find Aaron. 755 00:38:21,299 --> 00:38:22,534 Okay. 756 00:38:24,667 --> 00:38:27,299 ♪ A sexy Quint From sexy Jaws ♪ 757 00:38:27,432 --> 00:38:28,867 ♪ Catching sexy sharks ♪ 758 00:38:29,001 --> 00:38:32,332 ♪ Sexy Eleanor Roosevelt Or sexy Joan of Arc ♪ 759 00:38:32,466 --> 00:38:36,134 ♪ I can be a sexy pirate Or a sexy ballet dancer ♪ 760 00:38:36,267 --> 00:38:41,200 ♪ I can be a sexy doctor And cure some sexy cancer! ♪ 761 00:38:41,332 --> 00:38:43,534 That's not right, is it? No. 762 00:38:44,399 --> 00:38:46,200 I can sexy cure some cancer? 763 00:38:46,332 --> 00:38:47,801 No. 764 00:38:47,934 --> 00:38:49,700 I can cure sex cancer! 765 00:38:49,834 --> 00:38:51,967 Sex cancer doesn't exist. 766 00:38:52,101 --> 00:38:54,200 I did it. 767 00:38:54,332 --> 00:38:55,200 Dance break. 768 00:39:07,399 --> 00:39:09,399 ♪ Happy Halloween! ♪ 769 00:39:12,667 --> 00:39:16,267 ♪ This is Modern feminism talkin' ♪ 770 00:39:16,432 --> 00:39:20,134 ♪ Watch me as I run the world In shoes I cannot walk in ♪ 771 00:39:20,267 --> 00:39:23,467 ♪ I can be who I want to be ♪ 772 00:39:23,600 --> 00:39:27,167 ♪ And sex... sex ♪ 773 00:39:27,299 --> 00:39:31,567 ♪ Sexy! ♪ 774 00:39:32,734 --> 00:39:35,500 I'm a sexy mouse. Duh! 775 00:39:39,233 --> 00:39:40,700 Hey. Hi. 776 00:39:40,834 --> 00:39:41,967 Cady! 777 00:39:42,101 --> 00:39:43,500 Hi! 778 00:39:43,634 --> 00:39:45,767 - Ow. - Hey. 779 00:39:45,901 --> 00:39:47,534 I like your costume. 780 00:39:47,667 --> 00:39:49,467 Different from everyone else's. 781 00:39:49,600 --> 00:39:52,332 I didn't know I was supposed to... 782 00:39:53,634 --> 00:39:55,267 I'm such a weird foreign loser. 783 00:39:55,399 --> 00:39:57,067 No. It's great. 784 00:39:58,299 --> 00:39:59,399 You want a drink? 785 00:39:59,534 --> 00:40:01,767 Thanks. Uh, do they have juice? 786 00:40:03,133 --> 00:40:04,967 I can check. Wait here. 787 00:40:07,500 --> 00:40:10,366 I think you and Aaron would be a really cute couple. 788 00:40:10,500 --> 00:40:11,634 Really? Yeah. 789 00:40:11,767 --> 00:40:13,067 I just said so. Don't be thirsty. 790 00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:16,433 You know, I could talk to him for you. If you want. 791 00:40:16,567 --> 00:40:18,667 See if he likes you back. 792 00:40:18,801 --> 00:40:20,934 You would do that for me? Mm-hmm. 793 00:40:21,067 --> 00:40:23,901 Trust me. I know exactly how to play it. 794 00:40:27,467 --> 00:40:29,767 I need to talk to you. Me? 795 00:40:29,901 --> 00:40:31,600 I thought you were done talking to me 796 00:40:31,734 --> 00:40:33,200 when you started talking to Shane last summer. 797 00:40:33,332 --> 00:40:36,967 Shut up. 'Cause you know that homeschooled girl, Cady? 798 00:40:38,066 --> 00:40:39,667 Yeah, I invited her tonight. 799 00:40:40,734 --> 00:40:42,367 Yeah, well, be careful. 800 00:40:42,500 --> 00:40:44,167 'Cause she has a huge crush on you. 801 00:40:44,299 --> 00:40:47,001 Really? 802 00:40:47,133 --> 00:40:48,767 Don't be gross. 803 00:40:49,299 --> 00:40:50,867 She's my friend and... 804 00:40:51,001 --> 00:40:54,967 ...she's, like, really inexperienced and, um... 805 00:41:00,534 --> 00:41:02,734 Wow, sorry. 806 00:41:02,867 --> 00:41:05,001 I didn't think this would be so hard for me. 807 00:41:05,133 --> 00:41:06,200 What? 808 00:41:06,332 --> 00:41:07,634 I don't know, I guess I just... 809 00:41:07,767 --> 00:41:11,001 just have, like, a lot of, like, unresolved trauma 810 00:41:11,133 --> 00:41:12,801 from how things ended with us. 811 00:41:12,934 --> 00:41:14,500 Give me a break. 812 00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:19,433 Regina. 813 00:41:21,367 --> 00:41:23,100 Regina. Leave me alone. 814 00:41:23,233 --> 00:41:25,033 G, why are you upset? 815 00:41:25,167 --> 00:41:26,233 Please. 816 00:41:26,367 --> 00:41:29,400 What do you mean, please? G! 817 00:41:41,967 --> 00:41:44,867 ♪ Yes, I look perfect ♪ 818 00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:47,433 ♪ Ice Queen That's what you see ♪ 819 00:41:47,567 --> 00:41:50,767 ♪ It's what they all expect From me ♪ 820 00:41:50,901 --> 00:41:53,700 ♪ But it's all show ♪ 821 00:41:53,834 --> 00:41:56,567 ♪ Face it, you used me ♪ 822 00:41:56,700 --> 00:41:59,433 ♪ You saw the sexy clothes ♪ 823 00:41:59,567 --> 00:42:03,333 ♪ My supermodel pose ♪ 824 00:42:03,467 --> 00:42:05,534 ♪ What did you know? ♪ 825 00:42:05,667 --> 00:42:08,667 ♪ Was I a game to you? ♪ 826 00:42:08,801 --> 00:42:11,534 ♪ Was I a way to be cool? ♪ 827 00:42:11,667 --> 00:42:14,966 ♪ I truly cared ♪ 828 00:42:15,100 --> 00:42:17,634 ♪ Was I the fool? ♪ 829 00:42:17,767 --> 00:42:20,300 ♪ It's fine for you ♪ 830 00:42:20,433 --> 00:42:23,467 ♪ It's fine to flirt ♪ 831 00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:28,467 ♪ It's fine ♪ 832 00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:30,133 ♪ Till someone gets hurt ♪ 833 00:42:35,934 --> 00:42:38,400 ♪ Feel my heart beating? ♪ 834 00:42:38,534 --> 00:42:41,500 ♪ I'm just like her or you ♪ 835 00:42:41,634 --> 00:42:44,634 ♪ People forget I'm human, too ♪ 836 00:42:44,767 --> 00:42:47,066 ♪ Yes, they do that ♪ 837 00:42:48,300 --> 00:42:50,801 ♪ This is performance ♪ 838 00:42:50,933 --> 00:42:53,867 ♪ This is all self-defense ♪ 839 00:42:54,000 --> 00:42:57,167 ♪ I thought you had the sense ♪ 840 00:42:57,300 --> 00:42:59,600 ♪ To see through that ♪ 841 00:42:59,734 --> 00:43:02,534 ♪ Was I too proud with you? ♪ 842 00:43:02,667 --> 00:43:05,834 ♪ Was I too cold And forbidding? ♪ 843 00:43:05,966 --> 00:43:09,200 ♪ You chose her over me Well ♪ 844 00:43:09,367 --> 00:43:11,600 ♪ Are you kidding? ♪ 845 00:43:11,734 --> 00:43:14,268 ♪ It's fine for you ♪ 846 00:43:14,400 --> 00:43:16,867 ♪ It's fine to flirt ♪ 847 00:43:17,567 --> 00:43:22,333 ♪ It's fine ♪ 848 00:43:22,467 --> 00:43:24,367 ♪ Till someone gets hurt ♪ 849 00:43:28,634 --> 00:43:34,033 ♪ Till someone gets hurt! ♪ 850 00:43:35,734 --> 00:43:37,167 ♪ Poor little me ♪ 851 00:43:37,300 --> 00:43:41,367 ♪ I'm trapped In this fabulous show ♪ 852 00:43:41,500 --> 00:43:44,268 ♪ You could set me free ♪ 853 00:43:44,400 --> 00:43:49,400 ♪ But if you're going, go ♪ 854 00:43:51,600 --> 00:43:54,567 ♪ It's fine for you ♪ 855 00:43:54,700 --> 00:43:57,400 ♪ It's fine to flirt ♪ 856 00:43:57,534 --> 00:44:00,600 ♪ And, God, you're hot! ♪ 857 00:44:00,734 --> 00:44:03,567 ♪ Why do you even Wear a shirt? ♪ 858 00:44:03,700 --> 00:44:07,600 ♪ No, it's fine ♪ 859 00:44:07,734 --> 00:44:09,700 ♪ Damn, you're fine! ♪ 860 00:44:09,834 --> 00:44:15,100 ♪ And it's fine ♪ 861 00:44:15,234 --> 00:44:16,367 ♪ Till someone gets... ♪ 862 00:44:44,801 --> 00:44:48,201 She took him back. She took Aaron back. 863 00:44:48,333 --> 00:44:49,966 Of course she did. 864 00:44:50,100 --> 00:44:52,801 It's because Regina's a life ruiner! 865 00:44:52,933 --> 00:44:54,467 When we were in sixth grade, she told everybody 866 00:44:54,600 --> 00:44:55,933 that Janis was... Damian! 867 00:44:56,066 --> 00:44:58,201 Okay. She does not need to hear that right now. 868 00:44:58,333 --> 00:45:00,367 No, I know the story. 869 00:45:00,500 --> 00:45:03,101 You lit a fire 'cause Regina got a boyfriend. 870 00:45:03,234 --> 00:45:04,767 She said what? 871 00:45:04,900 --> 00:45:05,866 Oh, hell no. 872 00:45:06,000 --> 00:45:09,433 Damian... No! The truth will be told. 873 00:45:09,567 --> 00:45:10,933 Stay with me, Cady. 874 00:45:15,134 --> 00:45:18,866 Like all history, this is emotionally layered and culturally dense. 875 00:45:22,534 --> 00:45:24,734 Janis and Regina were best friends in middle school. 876 00:45:24,866 --> 00:45:29,300 And at that time, females expressed their identities through collectible plushies. 877 00:45:29,433 --> 00:45:30,900 I don't know what those... 878 00:45:31,033 --> 00:45:35,333 It's these bastards. And they were everywhere. 879 00:45:35,467 --> 00:45:38,800 Regina gave Janis a BFF set for her birthday. 880 00:45:38,933 --> 00:45:41,201 Janis put a rainbow patch on hers. 881 00:45:41,333 --> 00:45:43,067 This is how she came out to her friend. 882 00:45:43,201 --> 00:45:44,433 And Regina put one on hers, too, 883 00:45:44,567 --> 00:45:47,067 out of allyship because she used to be human. 884 00:45:47,201 --> 00:45:52,234 Cut to eight months later, Regina becomes obsessed with this gross boy. Kyle! 885 00:45:52,367 --> 00:45:54,866 Your scale is completely off. Hush! 886 00:45:56,667 --> 00:45:58,734 One night, they were all playing spin the bottle... 887 00:45:58,866 --> 00:46:01,734 And Regina was worried that Kyle liked Karen more. 888 00:46:01,866 --> 00:46:05,534 So when she spun and got Janis, 889 00:46:06,201 --> 00:46:07,833 Regina put on a little show. 890 00:46:11,300 --> 00:46:12,567 And Kyle was like "boing"! 891 00:46:12,700 --> 00:46:13,900 And Regina was like... 892 00:46:14,034 --> 00:46:15,433 ..."I knew she would let me! 893 00:46:15,567 --> 00:46:18,034 She's, like, obsessed with me!" 894 00:46:18,168 --> 00:46:19,367 Not okay. 895 00:46:19,500 --> 00:46:21,333 Please put this all back in its box. 896 00:46:21,467 --> 00:46:23,201 They got into a huge fight. 897 00:46:23,333 --> 00:46:25,168 Regina started avoiding Janis at school, 898 00:46:25,300 --> 00:46:27,067 but did she give back that plush animal? 899 00:46:27,201 --> 00:46:29,766 Oh, no. She took it everywhere. 900 00:46:29,900 --> 00:46:32,634 She named her "Sissy Liz" and she made everyone say 901 00:46:32,766 --> 00:46:34,134 "good morning" to it every day, 902 00:46:34,268 --> 00:46:35,433 and it was very weird and boring. 903 00:46:35,567 --> 00:46:36,667 Fast forward. 904 00:46:36,800 --> 00:46:38,600 One day in Science, 905 00:46:38,733 --> 00:46:41,367 Regina was making everyone say hi to Sissy Liz. 906 00:46:41,500 --> 00:46:43,367 And Janis finally heard it. 907 00:46:43,500 --> 00:46:45,833 "Sissy Liz" was short for "Obsessed Lesbian." 908 00:46:45,966 --> 00:46:49,134 Regina had been making fun of Janis this entire time 909 00:46:49,268 --> 00:46:50,699 and everyone but her knew it. 910 00:46:51,534 --> 00:46:53,833 So, and this is regrettable... 911 00:46:56,168 --> 00:46:57,667 Janis took her Bunsen burner... 912 00:46:59,400 --> 00:47:01,800 and torched the doll. 913 00:47:01,933 --> 00:47:04,067 And Regina's backpack caught on fire a little bit 914 00:47:04,201 --> 00:47:07,400 and Janis was kicked out of school for the remainder of the year. 915 00:47:07,534 --> 00:47:10,001 And the adults didn't know why. 916 00:47:10,134 --> 00:47:12,600 Janis just seemed crazy. 917 00:47:14,699 --> 00:47:16,833 I'm really sorry that happened. 918 00:47:18,600 --> 00:47:20,467 It's worse than my thing. 919 00:47:21,666 --> 00:47:23,300 Caddy, don't be sorry. 920 00:47:23,433 --> 00:47:26,800 Now you know Regina George is not your friend. 921 00:47:26,933 --> 00:47:28,433 We are your friends. 922 00:47:28,567 --> 00:47:30,367 And we're gonna make her pay. 923 00:47:33,866 --> 00:47:35,134 ♪ You know what friends do? ♪ 924 00:47:35,268 --> 00:47:36,967 ♪ They got your back ♪ 925 00:47:37,101 --> 00:47:39,866 ♪ And they are fun To be around ♪ ♪ Whoa ♪ 926 00:47:40,001 --> 00:47:42,034 ♪ When someone hurts you Then they attack ♪ 927 00:47:42,168 --> 00:47:44,666 ♪ And grind your foe Into the ground! ♪ 928 00:47:44,800 --> 00:47:46,367 ♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪ 929 00:47:46,500 --> 00:47:49,001 ♪ Imagine a party With dresses and cake ♪ 930 00:47:49,134 --> 00:47:51,967 ♪ And singing and dancing And cake ♪ 931 00:47:52,101 --> 00:47:55,268 ♪ And there's a magic act That saws Regina in half ♪ 932 00:47:55,400 --> 00:47:58,766 ♪ And this time It'll take ♪ 933 00:47:58,900 --> 00:48:03,134 Now that's a party! ♪ It's a revenge party A party that ends ♪ 934 00:48:03,268 --> 00:48:05,333 ♪ With somebody's head On a spike ♪ 935 00:48:05,467 --> 00:48:09,300 ♪ It's a revenge party With your two best friends ♪ 936 00:48:09,433 --> 00:48:12,600 ♪ It's like a party With revenge Is what it's like ♪ 937 00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:15,234 Caddy, in order for this to work, 938 00:48:15,367 --> 00:48:16,900 you need to act like a huge phony. 939 00:48:17,034 --> 00:48:18,300 Can you do it? 940 00:48:18,433 --> 00:48:19,633 I... I think so. 941 00:48:19,766 --> 00:48:21,134 Practice. 942 00:48:21,268 --> 00:48:24,168 Regina wanted me to tell you that she tried to talk to Aaron, 943 00:48:24,300 --> 00:48:27,534 but he just wanted her back, and that's not Regina's fault. 944 00:48:27,666 --> 00:48:29,633 Of course. Oh, my gosh. 945 00:48:30,333 --> 00:48:31,599 Love ya. See you at lunch. 946 00:48:31,733 --> 00:48:34,534 Perfect! On to phase two. 947 00:48:34,666 --> 00:48:36,633 ♪ I'll bring The glow sticks ♪ 948 00:48:36,766 --> 00:48:40,034 ♪ I'll bring balloons And we'll have Chocolate ice cream cones ♪ 949 00:48:40,168 --> 00:48:41,633 ♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪ 950 00:48:41,766 --> 00:48:44,067 ♪ I'll be the DJ Spinnin' the tunes ♪ 951 00:48:44,201 --> 00:48:47,101 ♪ On a turntable made Of her bones ♪ 952 00:48:47,234 --> 00:48:50,534 ♪ We'll get a piñata 'Cause that would be fun ♪ 953 00:48:50,666 --> 00:48:51,967 ♪ And play dress up And Barbies ♪ 954 00:48:52,101 --> 00:48:53,699 ♪ And tag ♪ 955 00:48:53,833 --> 00:48:55,234 ♪ And we'll roll on the grass ♪ 956 00:48:55,367 --> 00:48:56,901 ♪ And stare up at the sun ♪ 957 00:48:57,034 --> 00:48:59,800 ♪ Then we'll stuff her remains In a bag ♪ 958 00:48:59,934 --> 00:49:01,633 ♪ And throw 'em in the river! ♪ 959 00:49:01,766 --> 00:49:04,867 ♪ A revenge party A party that ends ♪ 960 00:49:05,001 --> 00:49:07,433 ♪ With entrails All over the lawn ♪ 961 00:49:07,566 --> 00:49:10,833 ♪ A revenge party With your two best friends ♪ 962 00:49:10,967 --> 00:49:13,467 ♪ And I end up with Aaron When she's gone ♪ 963 00:49:13,599 --> 00:49:15,934 ♪ Yes, bitch! ♪ 964 00:49:17,400 --> 00:49:19,901 I end up with Aaron when she's gone. 965 00:49:20,367 --> 00:49:21,833 Yes, bitch. 966 00:49:31,268 --> 00:49:32,467 I think I need a tutor. 967 00:49:32,599 --> 00:49:35,001 I could tutor you, if you want. 968 00:49:36,400 --> 00:49:38,333 ♪ What's Regina doin'? ♪ 969 00:49:38,467 --> 00:49:39,666 ♪ What's Regina wearin'? ♪ 970 00:49:39,800 --> 00:49:41,633 ♪ Is she back with Aaron? ♪ 971 00:49:41,766 --> 00:49:45,967 ♪ Regina! Regina! She has everything She gets everything ♪ 972 00:49:47,467 --> 00:49:49,500 ♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪ 973 00:49:50,333 --> 00:49:51,367 What is that? 974 00:49:51,500 --> 00:49:53,101 Ugh, I'm so fat and disgusting. 975 00:49:53,234 --> 00:49:54,367 I'm not having anything 976 00:49:54,500 --> 00:49:56,201 but Kälteen bars until I lose weight. 977 00:49:56,333 --> 00:49:57,666 Well, I need to lose three pounds. 978 00:49:57,800 --> 00:49:59,001 How many calories from fat? 979 00:49:59,134 --> 00:50:00,201 Zero. 980 00:50:00,333 --> 00:50:01,867 You cross-multiply x over a thousand 981 00:50:02,001 --> 00:50:03,733 and divide it by 0.5 because it's in kilograms. 982 00:50:03,867 --> 00:50:06,400 Whatever. Bring me a whole box. 983 00:50:06,533 --> 00:50:08,834 No, um, bring me two. 984 00:50:15,666 --> 00:50:18,566 ♪ A revenge party A party that ends ♪ 985 00:50:18,699 --> 00:50:21,599 ♪ With somebody crushed And alone ♪ ♪ And ugly-crying! ♪ 986 00:50:21,733 --> 00:50:24,599 ♪ A revenge party With your two best friends ♪ 987 00:50:24,733 --> 00:50:27,367 ♪ It's like a party With revenge Is what we're throwin'! ♪ 988 00:50:44,367 --> 00:50:46,201 ♪ What's Regina eating? ♪ 989 00:50:46,333 --> 00:50:47,834 ♪ God, look at her figure ♪ 990 00:50:47,967 --> 00:50:50,633 ♪ Did her boobs get bigger? Regina! Regina! ♪ 991 00:50:50,767 --> 00:50:52,268 ♪ She has everything! ♪ 992 00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:54,633 ♪ She gets everything! ♪ 993 00:50:54,767 --> 00:50:57,566 ♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪ 994 00:51:01,201 --> 00:51:04,234 Six weeks and all we've done is make Regina hotter and revive the wet look. 995 00:51:04,367 --> 00:51:05,967 We have to pivot. 996 00:51:06,101 --> 00:51:08,666 If we can make Gretchen Wieners think that Regina is mad at her... 997 00:51:08,801 --> 00:51:10,767 No, no, no. Gretchen is fragile. 998 00:51:10,901 --> 00:51:12,333 Exactly! 999 00:51:12,466 --> 00:51:14,367 If we crack her open, maybe she'll spill something we can use. 1000 00:51:22,367 --> 00:51:24,034 ♪ Party ♪ 1001 00:51:24,168 --> 00:51:26,666 Hey, girl, you sending any candy canes this year? 1002 00:51:26,801 --> 00:51:29,934 Oh. I don't send them. I just get them. 1003 00:51:31,367 --> 00:51:33,666 Um, stop pulling it down. 1004 00:51:33,801 --> 00:51:36,300 Your hair looks so sexy pushed back. 1005 00:51:37,168 --> 00:51:38,633 Cady, would you please tell him 1006 00:51:38,767 --> 00:51:41,034 that his hair looks sexy pushed back? 1007 00:51:42,533 --> 00:51:44,633 Your hair looks sexy pushed back. 1008 00:51:44,767 --> 00:51:45,801 Oh... 1009 00:51:51,268 --> 00:51:52,499 Thanks. 1010 00:51:56,268 --> 00:51:58,499 I'll, uh, see you in Calc. 1011 00:52:00,168 --> 00:52:02,834 ♪ At every party There might be a low ♪ 1012 00:52:02,967 --> 00:52:06,333 ♪ Where the energy dips ♪ ♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa ♪ 1013 00:52:06,466 --> 00:52:13,234 ♪ You might be thinking "It's late, we should go And they ran out of chips" ♪ 1014 00:52:13,367 --> 00:52:17,067 ♪ No! I can't even watch When she touches his hair ♪ 1015 00:52:17,201 --> 00:52:19,834 ♪ And I've watched a snake Eat a cow ♪ 1016 00:52:19,967 --> 00:52:23,533 ♪ Regina needs to be toppled Sorry, Gretchen, I swear ♪ 1017 00:52:23,667 --> 00:52:26,834 ♪ We'll get our party now! ♪ 1018 00:52:26,967 --> 00:52:29,001 One candy cane, please! 1019 00:52:31,168 --> 00:52:34,599 ♪ A revenge party A party that ends ♪ 1020 00:52:34,734 --> 00:52:36,767 ♪ With lions in a Roman arena ♪ 1021 00:52:36,901 --> 00:52:39,934 ♪ She has everything! She gets everything! ♪ 1022 00:52:41,001 --> 00:52:42,934 ♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪ 1023 00:52:43,067 --> 00:52:44,566 Ho, ho, ho! 1024 00:52:44,700 --> 00:52:46,767 Candy Cane Gram for Shane Oman! 1025 00:52:46,901 --> 00:52:48,300 ♪ She has everything! ♪ 1026 00:52:48,432 --> 00:52:50,366 And one for Cady Heron. 1027 00:52:50,499 --> 00:52:51,867 ♪ She gets everything! ♪ 1028 00:52:52,001 --> 00:52:53,901 Four for Glenn Cocco? 1029 00:52:54,034 --> 00:52:55,634 You go, Glenn Cocco! 1030 00:52:55,767 --> 00:52:57,967 ♪ Glenn Cocco! Glenn Cocco! Glenn Cocco! ♪ 1031 00:52:59,001 --> 00:53:02,934 And... none for Gretchen Wieners, bye. 1032 00:53:03,533 --> 00:53:04,499 Who sent that? 1033 00:53:04,634 --> 00:53:05,734 Oh, it's from... 1034 00:53:05,867 --> 00:53:07,834 ♪ Regina! Regina! Regina! ♪ 1035 00:53:07,967 --> 00:53:11,268 "Thanks for being such a great best friend." 1036 00:53:11,399 --> 00:53:12,566 Aw. 1037 00:53:13,268 --> 00:53:14,667 Oh. 1038 00:53:15,801 --> 00:53:16,867 Okay. 1039 00:53:18,034 --> 00:53:19,834 If you and Regina are "best friends" now, 1040 00:53:19,967 --> 00:53:22,533 then you can be in charge of keeping all her secrets, okay? 1041 00:53:22,667 --> 00:53:25,767 For example, she gave you those high-heel shoes just to make fun of you 1042 00:53:25,901 --> 00:53:28,834 because she knew you wouldn't be able to walk in them. Sorry! 1043 00:53:28,967 --> 00:53:31,700 Also, she says she has a nose job, 1044 00:53:31,834 --> 00:53:33,366 but that's just to distract from the fact 1045 00:53:33,499 --> 00:53:35,767 that she had one of her ears moved! 1046 00:53:35,901 --> 00:53:38,533 Also, she totally cheats on Aaron. 1047 00:53:38,667 --> 00:53:41,499 Yeah. Every Tuesday, she says she has College Prep, 1048 00:53:41,634 --> 00:53:43,234 but really she's hooking up with Shane Oman 1049 00:53:43,399 --> 00:53:44,901 in the third-floor janitorial closet 1050 00:53:45,034 --> 00:53:47,767 on the bags of sawdust that they use for barf! 1051 00:53:47,901 --> 00:53:49,901 And I never told anyone 1052 00:53:50,034 --> 00:53:52,268 because I'm such a good friend! 1053 00:53:54,168 --> 00:53:57,432 And I'm only telling you because you're such a good friend. 1054 00:54:03,901 --> 00:54:05,700 ♪ It's a revenge party ♪ 1055 00:54:05,834 --> 00:54:07,466 ♪ A party that ends ♪ 1056 00:54:07,600 --> 00:54:10,034 ♪ With somebody's head On a spike! ♪ 1057 00:54:10,168 --> 00:54:13,067 ♪ A revenge party With your two best friends ♪ 1058 00:54:13,201 --> 00:54:17,332 ♪ It's like a party With revenge Is what it's like ♪ 1059 00:54:35,901 --> 00:54:38,366 ♪ A party with revenge Is what it's like ♪ 1060 00:54:39,299 --> 00:54:42,299 ♪ A party with revenge ♪ 1061 00:54:42,432 --> 00:54:46,201 ♪ With revenge ♪ 1062 00:54:46,332 --> 00:54:47,967 ♪ Is what it's like! ♪ 1063 00:55:00,332 --> 00:55:03,634 Hey, do you have time to go over derivatives for a minute? 1064 00:55:04,233 --> 00:55:06,567 Oh, um... no, not today. 1065 00:55:09,101 --> 00:55:10,332 Cady? 1066 00:55:12,366 --> 00:55:13,934 Um... 1067 00:55:14,067 --> 00:55:16,399 You've failed your last five quizzes. Is everything okay? 1068 00:55:16,534 --> 00:55:18,901 I'm... I'm sorry. I'll just try harder. 1069 00:55:19,034 --> 00:55:20,734 Okay, because if you need extra help, 1070 00:55:20,867 --> 00:55:22,801 there's a Mathletes meeting starting in a couple minutes. 1071 00:55:22,934 --> 00:55:25,267 I can't. I'm sorry. I have to go to my friend Regina's house. 1072 00:55:25,399 --> 00:55:27,101 We're doing a dance in the talent show. 1073 00:55:27,233 --> 00:55:29,634 "Rockin' Around the Pole"? Yeah, how did you know? 1074 00:55:29,767 --> 00:55:31,600 They do it every year. It's like a... 1075 00:55:31,734 --> 00:55:33,700 Tradition? Recurring nightmare. 1076 00:55:34,667 --> 00:55:37,200 Okay, I could probably get Kevin to tutor you. 1077 00:55:37,332 --> 00:55:38,967 Well, Aaron's tutoring me now, so... 1078 00:55:39,101 --> 00:55:41,734 Oh, he's tutoring you? Sure, okay, well, 1079 00:55:41,867 --> 00:55:44,034 let Aaron know that the weird thing with your quizzes 1080 00:55:44,167 --> 00:55:47,399 is that all the work is right and only the answers are wrong. 1081 00:55:47,534 --> 00:55:49,700 Huh. Huh. 1082 00:55:49,834 --> 00:55:52,700 Cady, I am not gonna stop pushing you, because I'm a pusher. 1083 00:55:52,834 --> 00:55:54,867 And I know you're smarter than this. 1084 00:55:55,001 --> 00:55:59,167 Maybe I should just push your seat away from Aaron's. 1085 00:55:59,299 --> 00:56:02,134 Ugh! And she was like, "I'm a pusher, Cady. I'm a pusher." 1086 00:56:02,267 --> 00:56:04,634 Wait, what does she even mean, she's a "pusher"? 1087 00:56:04,767 --> 00:56:09,200 Like a drug pusher? I don't know. She's so weird. 1088 00:56:09,332 --> 00:56:12,366 Let it all out, honey. Put it in the book. 1089 00:56:14,734 --> 00:56:17,067 Look at this thing! 1090 00:56:18,267 --> 00:56:21,233 I can't even see it. It's sexy, like a face breast. 1091 00:56:21,366 --> 00:56:25,101 It happens to me, too. It's just the Kälteen bars flushing your toxins. 1092 00:56:25,233 --> 00:56:26,500 Huh. Okay. 1093 00:56:26,634 --> 00:56:28,867 Well, this skin stuff you gave me sucks! 1094 00:56:29,366 --> 00:56:30,834 Where did you get it? 1095 00:56:40,167 --> 00:56:41,233 The Paris airport. 1096 00:56:41,366 --> 00:56:42,500 Oh, "the Paris airport." 1097 00:56:42,634 --> 00:56:44,700 Well, it's garbage. And so are you. 1098 00:56:47,167 --> 00:56:49,934 She's just grouchy because Aaron broke up with her. 1099 00:56:50,067 --> 00:56:51,366 He did? 1100 00:56:51,500 --> 00:56:53,332 Someone told him about Shane. 1101 00:56:54,034 --> 00:56:55,767 Do you think it was Santa? 1102 00:56:56,867 --> 00:56:58,332 Oh... 1103 00:56:58,467 --> 00:57:01,167 Also, all that she's been eating are those Kälteen bars, 1104 00:57:01,299 --> 00:57:03,667 and I don't think she's pooped in, like, two weeks. 1105 00:57:03,801 --> 00:57:05,001 Uh... 1106 00:57:05,133 --> 00:57:07,067 Hey, G, we've practiced a bunch with Cady. 1107 00:57:07,200 --> 00:57:08,233 You want to run it once? 1108 00:57:08,366 --> 00:57:10,332 Why? I'm perfect every year. 1109 00:57:10,467 --> 00:57:11,700 Mm-hmm. 1110 00:57:11,834 --> 00:57:13,867 Yeah, but it's, uh, Cady's first time 1111 00:57:14,001 --> 00:57:15,867 and there's a bunch of traffic patterns... 1112 00:57:16,001 --> 00:57:18,967 Stop playing with that stupid babyish book! 1113 00:58:03,801 --> 00:58:05,834 Uh, that was Damian Hubbard singing... 1114 00:58:05,967 --> 00:58:08,433 ...the iCarly theme song 1115 00:58:08,567 --> 00:58:10,167 in French for extra credit. 1116 00:58:10,333 --> 00:58:11,534 Yeah! 1117 00:58:12,834 --> 00:58:15,299 Our next act describes their music 1118 00:58:15,433 --> 00:58:18,600 as "Like a sine wave, they don't stop." 1119 00:58:18,734 --> 00:58:22,167 Please welcome Kevin G and the Power of Three. 1120 00:58:22,299 --> 00:58:24,333 Uh. Yeah. 1121 00:58:24,467 --> 00:58:26,367 ♪ All you ♪ 1122 00:58:26,500 --> 00:58:28,700 ♪ Suckah emcees Ain't got nothin' on me ♪ 1123 00:58:28,834 --> 00:58:31,133 ♪ From my grades to my rhymes You can't touch Kevin G ♪ 1124 00:58:31,267 --> 00:58:32,333 ♪ I'm a Mathlete ♪ 1125 00:58:32,467 --> 00:58:34,100 ♪ So good under pressure ♪ 1126 00:58:34,233 --> 00:58:35,967 ♪ I'ma find acute angles To prioritize your pleasure ♪ 1127 00:58:36,100 --> 00:58:38,267 ♪ I'm a Model UN rep Out in these streets ♪ 1128 00:58:38,400 --> 00:58:40,667 ♪ But I'm a overachiever Under the sheets ♪ 1129 00:58:40,801 --> 00:58:43,367 ♪ She be like "Uhhhh, Kevin G!" ♪ 1130 00:58:43,500 --> 00:58:44,967 Inappropriate. 1131 00:58:45,100 --> 00:58:46,367 Kevin, we talked about this. 1132 00:58:46,500 --> 00:58:48,967 Well, happy holidays, everybody. 1133 00:58:51,233 --> 00:58:53,534 Why is this so tight? 1134 00:58:53,667 --> 00:58:55,333 You've had it since the sixth grade. 1135 00:58:55,467 --> 00:58:57,167 You're probably maturing. 1136 00:58:57,300 --> 00:59:00,233 Um, do you just, like, want to run it one time real quick? 1137 00:59:00,367 --> 00:59:03,500 Gretchen, literally no one cares. 1138 00:59:03,634 --> 00:59:05,600 Mm-hmm. No, totally. 1139 00:59:05,734 --> 00:59:07,801 Um, do you just want to run the acro? 1140 00:59:07,934 --> 00:59:09,934 Because none of us really does gymnastics anymore 1141 00:59:10,066 --> 00:59:12,100 and when we made up this dance, we all weighed, like, 70 pounds, 1142 00:59:12,233 --> 00:59:15,667 so maybe we should just make sure everyone's center of gravity is still... 1143 00:59:15,801 --> 00:59:16,901 Still what? 1144 00:59:18,100 --> 00:59:19,033 Nothing. 1145 00:59:26,200 --> 00:59:30,066 Thank you, Shelby and Timmy, for tapping. 1146 00:59:30,200 --> 00:59:31,867 Also, if anyone finds a retainer 1147 00:59:32,000 --> 00:59:35,300 in a bright aqua case, that is mine. 1148 00:59:35,433 --> 00:59:36,700 Please return it. 1149 00:59:36,834 --> 00:59:39,300 My insurance won't cover a replacement. 1150 00:59:40,333 --> 00:59:41,901 Karen, I can see your bra. 1151 00:59:42,033 --> 00:59:43,834 It's on purpose. I'm going for a look. 1152 00:59:43,966 --> 00:59:45,700 Is it "girl who slept with 11 people"? 1153 00:59:45,834 --> 00:59:47,367 'Cause you're nailing it. 1154 00:59:48,867 --> 00:59:51,734 I think your top is fetch. Gretchen! 1155 00:59:51,867 --> 00:59:53,966 Stop trying to make "fetch" happen. 1156 00:59:54,100 --> 00:59:56,966 It's not going to happen. 1157 01:00:00,534 --> 01:00:03,201 Okay, please welcome Santa's Helpers 1158 01:00:03,333 --> 01:00:05,167 doing "Rockin' Around the Pole." 1159 01:00:15,033 --> 01:00:17,433 ♪ We're gonna Take a Christmas train ♪ 1160 01:00:17,567 --> 01:00:19,500 ♪ To where Santa lives ♪ 1161 01:00:19,634 --> 01:00:22,367 ♪ Up through the sleet And snow ♪ 1162 01:00:22,500 --> 01:00:25,867 ♪ Then we'll hop and bop Straight to the top ♪ 1163 01:00:26,000 --> 01:00:28,933 ♪ Last stop the North Pole ♪ 1164 01:00:30,534 --> 01:00:34,066 ♪ And we'll be rock, rock Rockin' around the pole ♪ 1165 01:00:34,201 --> 01:00:37,066 ♪ Where the northern lights Are bright ♪ 1166 01:00:37,201 --> 01:00:40,834 ♪ Rock, rock, rockin' Around the pole ♪ 1167 01:00:40,966 --> 01:00:43,933 ♪ We'll rock that pole All night ♪ 1168 01:00:44,066 --> 01:00:47,300 ♪ And we'll be sing, sing Singin' a Christmas tune ♪ 1169 01:00:47,433 --> 01:00:49,033 Thank you, next! 1170 01:00:50,400 --> 01:00:54,100 ♪ Yeah, we'll be rock Rock, rockin' up on that pole ♪ 1171 01:00:54,234 --> 01:00:57,066 ♪ Rockin' till the break Of day ♪ 1172 01:00:57,201 --> 01:01:00,100 ♪ Yeah, we'll be rockin' Stuffin' a stockin' ♪ 1173 01:01:00,234 --> 01:01:03,234 ♪ And they'll be talkin' About us in town ♪ 1174 01:01:03,367 --> 01:01:05,433 ♪ Yeah, we'll be rockin' ♪ 1175 01:01:05,567 --> 01:01:07,333 ♪ And rollin' and lockin' And strollin' ♪ 1176 01:01:07,467 --> 01:01:11,234 ♪ Till the North Pole police Come shut us down ♪ 1177 01:01:32,933 --> 01:01:36,100 So, I went to the Christmas show and it was a mess, y'all. 1178 01:01:36,234 --> 01:01:37,966 Regina ate total shit. 1179 01:01:38,100 --> 01:01:39,534 I think people saw her nipple. 1180 01:01:39,667 --> 01:01:41,000 It's just unprofessional. 1181 01:01:41,134 --> 01:01:42,467 This was kind of hilarious. 1182 01:01:44,734 --> 01:01:46,134 I've watched 1183 01:01:46,268 --> 01:01:49,667 this video a thousand times. Gretchen piledrived Regina. 1184 01:01:49,800 --> 01:01:51,400 Regina really should be lifting through her glutes. 1185 01:01:51,534 --> 01:01:53,433 Regina challenge! 1186 01:01:53,567 --> 01:01:55,134 You know what that bitch gets? 1187 01:01:55,268 --> 01:01:56,433 Not my sympathy. 1188 01:01:56,567 --> 01:01:57,800 It's not like we like Regina anyway. 1189 01:01:57,933 --> 01:01:59,700 She's such a bitch. She's so spoiled. 1190 01:01:59,833 --> 01:02:01,900 Regina always wanted to be the center of attention. 1191 01:02:02,033 --> 01:02:04,268 Girl, we all see you. 1192 01:02:04,433 --> 01:02:06,300 Regina got what she deserves. 1193 01:02:06,433 --> 01:02:08,168 But you know, that Cady girl was kind of cute. 1194 01:02:08,300 --> 01:02:09,234 You know, she stayed, she waved. 1195 01:02:09,367 --> 01:02:11,534 She ate, like, house down. 1196 01:02:11,667 --> 01:02:13,234 Cady Heron was the only one that acted normal. 1197 01:02:13,367 --> 01:02:14,866 - Oh, yeah. - I think she salvaged 1198 01:02:15,000 --> 01:02:16,634 the worst tradition of the year. 1199 01:02:16,766 --> 01:02:18,600 Period. She was... She's kind of hot. 1200 01:02:18,734 --> 01:02:20,600 She might even be hotter than Regina George. 1201 01:02:20,734 --> 01:02:23,500 No zits. Gum health. American Eagle. 1202 01:02:23,634 --> 01:02:25,201 Cady doesn't even have to wear deodorant. 1203 01:02:25,333 --> 01:02:26,667 I'm thinking of going red. 1204 01:02:26,800 --> 01:02:28,234 Okay, so, somebody sent me this look, and I was like, 1205 01:02:28,367 --> 01:02:30,201 "Hot girls, we are going back to red! 1206 01:02:30,333 --> 01:02:32,033 Y2K fire-crotch is back!" 1207 01:02:32,168 --> 01:02:33,700 Thank you, Cady Heron. 1208 01:02:33,833 --> 01:02:35,766 Cady was looking good. 1209 01:02:37,168 --> 01:02:38,600 Caddy! 1210 01:02:39,367 --> 01:02:41,000 Did you hear me? 1211 01:02:41,134 --> 01:02:43,433 What? We did it. 1212 01:02:43,567 --> 01:02:44,800 Regina lost her hot boyfriend. 1213 01:02:44,933 --> 01:02:46,367 She lost her status over everyone. 1214 01:02:46,500 --> 01:02:48,067 She popped her blemish against the stage floor. 1215 01:02:48,201 --> 01:02:49,634 That's rock bottom. 1216 01:02:50,367 --> 01:02:52,367 We can stop. We're even. 1217 01:02:52,500 --> 01:02:54,067 Finally you don't have to talk to them anymore. 1218 01:02:54,201 --> 01:02:56,500 We can finally have lunch together tomorrow. 1219 01:02:56,634 --> 01:02:57,966 I'm getting dumplings. 1220 01:02:58,101 --> 01:03:00,034 Unless they have pizza bagels, then I might get both. 1221 01:03:00,168 --> 01:03:01,833 So good. I can't. 1222 01:03:04,034 --> 01:03:05,933 I need one more lunch. 1223 01:03:29,500 --> 01:03:32,467 I'm sorry, Regina. You can't sit with us. 1224 01:03:34,667 --> 01:03:36,067 What? 1225 01:03:37,067 --> 01:03:39,966 You're wearing sweatpants. It's Thursday. 1226 01:03:40,800 --> 01:03:42,500 Whatever. Those rules aren't real. 1227 01:03:42,634 --> 01:03:43,933 They were real that day I wore a vest. 1228 01:03:44,067 --> 01:03:45,634 Yeah, because that vest was disgusting! 1229 01:03:45,766 --> 01:03:48,168 You can't sit with us! 1230 01:04:00,933 --> 01:04:03,634 These sweatpants are all that fit me right now. 1231 01:04:07,001 --> 01:04:08,367 What do you think, Cady? 1232 01:04:15,201 --> 01:04:19,001 Sorry, Regina. Rules are rules. 1233 01:04:21,034 --> 01:04:22,067 Fine. 1234 01:04:24,367 --> 01:04:27,467 Oh. 1235 01:04:29,534 --> 01:04:31,699 Take a picture, losers. It'll last longer. 1236 01:04:40,001 --> 01:04:41,699 And that... ...was the beginning... 1237 01:04:41,833 --> 01:04:42,833 ...of the... ...mother******* 1238 01:04:42,967 --> 01:04:44,567 ...end. 1239 01:04:47,866 --> 01:04:49,400 Hello, may I have your attention 1240 01:04:49,534 --> 01:04:51,268 for this morning's announcements? 1241 01:04:52,500 --> 01:04:53,967 In honor of Women's History Month, 1242 01:04:54,101 --> 01:04:57,633 the cafeteria is offering vegan "Confident Joannes" 1243 01:04:57,766 --> 01:05:00,534 which are Sloppy Joes made of beans. 1244 01:05:02,500 --> 01:05:04,067 Secondly, we want to wish good luck 1245 01:05:04,201 --> 01:05:06,567 to junior, Janis 'Imi'ike... 1246 01:05:06,699 --> 01:05:07,934 ...who is a finalist 1247 01:05:08,067 --> 01:05:10,567 in the Illinois Art Expo this Saturday. 1248 01:05:10,699 --> 01:05:13,168 Go, Lions! Even for Art. 1249 01:05:13,300 --> 01:05:14,800 - Art, art, art! - Next up, 1250 01:05:14,934 --> 01:05:17,333 the Students Activities Committee voted, 1251 01:05:17,467 --> 01:05:18,967 and the theme for this year's Spring Fling... 1252 01:05:19,101 --> 01:05:21,766 What's that lip color? Oh, it's e.l.f. O Face in... 1253 01:05:21,901 --> 01:05:22,934 No, amazing, yeah. 1254 01:05:23,067 --> 01:05:24,733 I was just making sure your ears still worked. 1255 01:05:24,866 --> 01:05:29,433 And finally, the nominees for Spring Fling King and Queen 1256 01:05:29,567 --> 01:05:30,967 are as follows: 1257 01:05:31,101 --> 01:05:32,866 For King, Aaron Samuels, 1258 01:05:33,001 --> 01:05:36,067 Christian Wiggins and Shane Oman. 1259 01:05:36,201 --> 01:05:38,400 And Damian Hubbard. What? 1260 01:05:39,234 --> 01:05:40,467 For Queen... 1261 01:05:40,599 --> 01:05:41,833 ...Regina George... 1262 01:05:41,967 --> 01:05:44,500 ...Karen Shetty and Gretchen Wieners. 1263 01:05:44,633 --> 01:05:46,901 - Same old, same old. - And Caddy Heron. 1264 01:05:49,967 --> 01:05:51,101 Wow. 1265 01:05:51,234 --> 01:05:52,367 Wait, my mistake. 1266 01:05:54,867 --> 01:05:56,333 Cady Heron. 1267 01:06:00,333 --> 01:06:01,599 Oh, my God. 1268 01:06:01,733 --> 01:06:04,934 Oh, my God, so many people are texting me. 1269 01:06:05,067 --> 01:06:07,833 Should I, um, text Aaron and congratulate him? 1270 01:06:07,967 --> 01:06:08,867 No. 1271 01:06:09,001 --> 01:06:10,733 Hey, do you want a lift this weekend? 1272 01:06:10,867 --> 01:06:13,001 'Cause Damian's borrowing his grandma's Jazzy. 1273 01:06:13,134 --> 01:06:14,733 A lift to what? 1274 01:06:15,967 --> 01:06:18,500 My art show. Didn't you just hear Mr. Duvall talking about it? 1275 01:06:18,633 --> 01:06:21,168 Oh, that's this weekend? Yeah. 1276 01:06:21,300 --> 01:06:25,300 Oh, shoot. I have tickets to this thing in Madison with my mom. 1277 01:06:25,433 --> 01:06:26,800 Uh, I'm sorry. 1278 01:06:28,633 --> 01:06:31,367 Yeah, you seem super sad about it. 1279 01:06:33,967 --> 01:06:36,268 So, what are we doing this weekend? 1280 01:06:36,400 --> 01:06:38,101 Why is everyone asking me about the weekend? 1281 01:06:38,234 --> 01:06:39,467 It's Tuesday. 1282 01:06:39,599 --> 01:06:42,934 Yeah, the weekend is only... several days away. 1283 01:06:43,067 --> 01:06:45,433 I have to go to this thing in Madison with my mom. 1284 01:06:45,566 --> 01:06:47,268 Your mom is going away? You should have people over. 1285 01:06:47,400 --> 01:06:48,867 No, I'm going with her. 1286 01:06:49,001 --> 01:06:52,400 Well, if you have people over, you can invite Aaron. 1287 01:06:55,699 --> 01:06:56,834 Huh. 1288 01:06:56,967 --> 01:06:58,599 Yeah, I guess I could get out of it. 1289 01:06:58,733 --> 01:07:00,733 But, like, 1290 01:07:00,867 --> 01:07:04,234 we would keep it small, right? Like five or six people? 1291 01:07:04,400 --> 01:07:05,599 Yes! Sure! 1292 01:07:05,733 --> 01:07:08,101 Why are you doing this to me?! 1293 01:07:08,234 --> 01:07:11,034 I promised my friend Janis I'd go to her art show! 1294 01:07:11,168 --> 01:07:13,533 But, binti, we've had these tickets for months. 1295 01:07:13,666 --> 01:07:15,134 You love Neil deGrasse Tyson. 1296 01:07:15,268 --> 01:07:16,234 Mom! 1297 01:07:16,367 --> 01:07:18,566 Janis is my best friend! 1298 01:07:18,699 --> 01:07:20,433 Do you not want me to be a good friend?! 1299 01:07:20,566 --> 01:07:21,801 No! Yes! What? 1300 01:07:21,934 --> 01:07:25,901 You can, uh, stay home on your own, I guess. 1301 01:07:26,034 --> 01:07:28,168 Hey. I'm having a small get-together 1302 01:07:28,300 --> 01:07:31,466 at my house tomorrow night. My mom's away, so... 1303 01:07:31,599 --> 01:07:32,733 Is Regina going? 1304 01:07:32,867 --> 01:07:35,433 No! Do you think I'm an idiot? No. 1305 01:07:35,566 --> 01:07:37,466 It's just gonna be a few cool people, 1306 01:07:37,599 --> 01:07:39,566 and you better be one of them, byotch. 1307 01:07:40,499 --> 01:07:42,599 Okay. I'll be there. 1308 01:08:00,466 --> 01:08:01,901 No, no, no! 1309 01:08:13,432 --> 01:08:15,168 Have you seen Aaron? 1310 01:08:15,300 --> 01:08:17,001 What? Aaron! 1311 01:08:17,134 --> 01:08:18,734 Karen? 1312 01:08:19,901 --> 01:08:20,934 Hi. 1313 01:08:25,234 --> 01:08:27,399 Whoo! 1314 01:08:34,432 --> 01:08:36,034 I've been looking for you. 1315 01:08:36,901 --> 01:08:38,300 Me as well. 1316 01:08:38,432 --> 01:08:41,466 I like your costume. I mean, um, your dress. 1317 01:08:42,566 --> 01:08:44,168 Is this you holding a crocodile? 1318 01:08:44,333 --> 01:08:47,268 Oh, my God, don't look at that. That is so embarrassing. 1319 01:08:47,399 --> 01:08:49,867 No, it's not. It's awesome. 1320 01:08:50,834 --> 01:08:51,967 You miss Kenya? 1321 01:08:52,101 --> 01:08:53,201 Yes. 1322 01:08:53,333 --> 01:08:55,001 No. I mean, I... 1323 01:08:56,067 --> 01:08:57,667 Well, I miss... 1324 01:08:57,801 --> 01:09:00,201 I could see a lot more sky there. 1325 01:09:00,333 --> 01:09:01,533 At night. 1326 01:09:01,667 --> 01:09:04,867 My mom and I used to map the constellations. 1327 01:09:05,499 --> 01:09:07,001 The stars. 1328 01:09:15,767 --> 01:09:17,499 You still on the treadmill, honey? 1329 01:09:17,633 --> 01:09:19,533 No, I'm over there. 1330 01:09:20,633 --> 01:09:24,034 You got any plans tonight? It's Saturday. 1331 01:09:24,168 --> 01:09:26,201 Mom, don't bother me. 1332 01:09:26,333 --> 01:09:29,599 I know you're not feeling your best about your body right now, 1333 01:09:29,734 --> 01:09:33,700 but remember that real beauty comes from the face. 1334 01:09:33,834 --> 01:09:37,634 Don't ever talk about my body! 1335 01:09:37,767 --> 01:09:39,734 Okay, okay. 1336 01:09:43,034 --> 01:09:46,566 Wait, honey, why are you eating Kälteen bars? 1337 01:09:46,700 --> 01:09:48,834 These are what we gave Nana Joan 1338 01:09:48,967 --> 01:09:50,901 when we needed her to gain weight. 1339 01:10:14,533 --> 01:10:16,366 I am drinking 1340 01:10:16,499 --> 01:10:18,432 not juice tonight. 1341 01:10:18,566 --> 01:10:20,634 I know. I can tell. 1342 01:10:21,366 --> 01:10:22,466 We should go downstairs. 1343 01:10:22,600 --> 01:10:25,134 No, no, no, sit down. I'm amazing. 1344 01:10:31,634 --> 01:10:34,801 I think you should wear your hair however you want. 1345 01:10:34,934 --> 01:10:37,834 I think it looks good both ways. 1346 01:10:41,466 --> 01:10:44,101 Thank you for inviting me tonight. 1347 01:10:44,234 --> 01:10:47,201 I think I've spent too much time being pissed at Regina. 1348 01:10:47,332 --> 01:10:48,667 Yeah, you really have. 1349 01:10:48,801 --> 01:10:51,967 No more liars. I would never lie to you. 1350 01:10:53,432 --> 01:10:55,600 I mean, I did lie to you once. 1351 01:10:55,734 --> 01:10:58,234 But you are totally gonna laugh when I tell you. 1352 01:10:58,399 --> 01:10:59,567 Tell me what? 1353 01:10:59,700 --> 01:11:01,801 We're in here! 1354 01:11:06,834 --> 01:11:09,801 I pretended to be bad at math 1355 01:11:09,934 --> 01:11:12,499 to get you to help me, but I'm not bad at math. 1356 01:11:12,634 --> 01:11:15,034 I'm actually... I'm actually really good at math. 1357 01:11:15,168 --> 01:11:19,168 You're the one who's only kind of okay at math. 1358 01:11:19,299 --> 01:11:21,399 Anyways, um, now I'm failing. 1359 01:11:21,534 --> 01:11:25,700 So isn't that so dumb? That is dumb, yeah. 1360 01:11:26,600 --> 01:11:27,934 Why wouldn't you just talk to me? 1361 01:11:28,067 --> 01:11:29,901 Because of Regina. 'Cause you were her property. 1362 01:11:30,034 --> 01:11:32,134 Her property? Shut up. Not her property. 1363 01:11:32,267 --> 01:11:33,667 Don't tell me to shut up. 1364 01:11:35,201 --> 01:11:37,399 What? Aaron, sit down. 1365 01:11:37,534 --> 01:11:39,233 You are a clone of Regina. 1366 01:11:42,168 --> 01:11:43,567 No. No, no, no! 1367 01:11:43,700 --> 01:11:46,168 What are you thinking about? 1368 01:11:46,299 --> 01:11:47,366 Chicken wings later. 1369 01:11:47,500 --> 01:11:48,734 Do you ever think about me? 1370 01:11:48,867 --> 01:11:51,867 Sometimes. When I'm looking right at you. 1371 01:12:00,233 --> 01:12:02,299 Cady, Cady, Cady! No, no, no. 1372 01:12:06,233 --> 01:12:07,534 Aaron! 1373 01:12:16,567 --> 01:12:18,634 You dirty little liar. 1374 01:12:19,432 --> 01:12:20,734 I... I can explain. 1375 01:12:20,867 --> 01:12:22,567 Explain how you're supposed to be out of town 1376 01:12:22,700 --> 01:12:24,101 but there are 60 different people 1377 01:12:24,233 --> 01:12:25,734 posting pictures from your party? 1378 01:12:25,867 --> 01:12:27,299 You know I couldn't invite you. 1379 01:12:27,432 --> 01:12:29,233 I... I have to act like I don't know you. 1380 01:12:29,366 --> 01:12:31,299 You are full of lies! 1381 01:12:31,432 --> 01:12:33,200 Janis, I cannot stop this Jazzy. 1382 01:12:33,332 --> 01:12:34,399 You know I have a curfew! 1383 01:12:34,534 --> 01:12:36,167 You would hate this party. 1384 01:12:36,299 --> 01:12:38,134 Why? Aren't you having an amazing time 1385 01:12:38,267 --> 01:12:39,534 with your amazing friends? 1386 01:12:39,667 --> 01:12:41,299 Janis, I can't spend every minute with you. 1387 01:12:41,432 --> 01:12:43,767 It's not my fault you're like obsessed with me or something! 1388 01:12:46,700 --> 01:12:50,267 What? Oh, no, she didn't. 1389 01:12:50,399 --> 01:12:52,600 See, this is the problem with you Plastics. 1390 01:12:52,734 --> 01:12:54,667 You think everyone is obsessed with you 1391 01:12:54,801 --> 01:12:56,534 when actually everybody hates you. 1392 01:12:56,667 --> 01:12:58,467 You made me like this. 1393 01:12:58,600 --> 01:13:00,667 It was your idea for me to pretend to be Plastic! 1394 01:13:00,801 --> 01:13:02,433 Buddy, it's not pretend! 1395 01:13:02,567 --> 01:13:04,034 ♪ You are as plastic As they come ♪ 1396 01:13:04,167 --> 01:13:05,734 ♪ You think Your shit don't stink ♪ 1397 01:13:05,867 --> 01:13:07,399 ♪ You think The rest of us are dumb ♪ 1398 01:13:07,534 --> 01:13:09,001 ♪ I hate Regina's guts ♪ 1399 01:13:09,133 --> 01:13:10,433 ♪ But here's what You don't comprehend ♪ 1400 01:13:10,567 --> 01:13:11,901 ♪ At least she has the guts ♪ 1401 01:13:12,034 --> 01:13:14,534 ♪ To not pretend To be my friend! ♪ 1402 01:13:15,834 --> 01:13:16,734 Here. 1403 01:13:17,500 --> 01:13:20,567 Have this. It won an award. Janis. 1404 01:13:20,700 --> 01:13:23,934 ♪ No, it's fine ♪ 1405 01:13:24,067 --> 01:13:27,001 ♪ Really fine ♪ 1406 01:13:27,133 --> 01:13:32,901 ♪ Go be fine! ♪ 1407 01:13:34,200 --> 01:13:36,034 And I want my pink shirt. 1408 01:14:14,600 --> 01:14:19,100 ♪ My name is Regina George ♪ 1409 01:14:19,967 --> 01:14:25,299 ♪ And I am a massive deal ♪ 1410 01:14:25,433 --> 01:14:31,167 ♪ I will grind you to sand ♪ 1411 01:14:31,299 --> 01:14:36,367 ♪ Beneath my Louboutin-ed heel ♪ 1412 01:14:36,500 --> 01:14:41,167 ♪ This is what I get For helping ♪ 1413 01:14:41,299 --> 01:14:46,333 ♪ Helping someone lame fit in ♪ 1414 01:14:46,467 --> 01:14:48,734 ♪ Cady Heron ♪ 1415 01:14:48,867 --> 01:14:53,867 ♪ Enjoy your temporary win ♪ 1416 01:14:57,233 --> 01:15:01,467 ♪ My name is Regina George ♪ 1417 01:15:02,367 --> 01:15:07,567 ♪ "This girl is a fugly cow" ♪ 1418 01:15:07,700 --> 01:15:10,133 ♪ Hey, Cady ♪ 1419 01:15:10,267 --> 01:15:17,500 ♪ How you like me now? ♪ 1420 01:15:18,734 --> 01:15:21,133 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1421 01:15:21,267 --> 01:15:23,834 ♪ I brought the gasoline ♪ 1422 01:15:23,967 --> 01:15:26,066 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1423 01:15:26,200 --> 01:15:29,333 ♪ And everyone get mean ♪ 1424 01:15:29,467 --> 01:15:31,734 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1425 01:15:31,867 --> 01:15:33,901 ♪ I got the gasoline ♪ 1426 01:15:34,033 --> 01:15:36,534 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1427 01:15:36,667 --> 01:15:40,167 ♪ And everyone get ♪ 1428 01:15:40,300 --> 01:15:44,700 ♪ Mean ♪ 1429 01:16:00,834 --> 01:16:03,734 ♪ Cady, time to Watch your back ♪ 1430 01:16:03,867 --> 01:16:06,333 ♪ Cady, time to turn and cough ♪ 1431 01:16:06,467 --> 01:16:08,966 ♪ Because you took me down ♪ 1432 01:16:09,100 --> 01:16:14,100 ♪ But you didn't finish me off ♪ 1433 01:16:16,834 --> 01:16:19,200 ♪ My name is Regina George ♪ 1434 01:16:19,333 --> 01:16:21,867 ♪ And in case You're keeping score ♪ 1435 01:16:22,000 --> 01:16:24,367 ♪ Cady may have won the battle ♪ 1436 01:16:24,500 --> 01:16:27,167 ♪ But I will win the war ♪ 1437 01:16:28,901 --> 01:16:32,167 I'm just so upset, Mr. Duvall. 1438 01:16:32,300 --> 01:16:33,600 We found it in the hallway. 1439 01:16:33,734 --> 01:16:36,200 I mean, the things it says about me? 1440 01:16:36,333 --> 01:16:37,634 The things it says about all of us? 1441 01:16:37,767 --> 01:16:39,500 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1442 01:16:39,634 --> 01:16:42,133 ♪ Trang Pham Is a grotsky byotch! ♪ 1443 01:16:44,066 --> 01:16:48,100 "Rachel Hamilton fills her inhaler with vodka"? 1444 01:16:48,234 --> 01:16:50,667 I mean... does that work? 1445 01:16:52,734 --> 01:16:54,167 ♪ I got the gasoline ♪ 1446 01:16:54,300 --> 01:16:55,700 ♪ Ms. Norbury's ♪ 1447 01:16:55,834 --> 01:16:57,268 ♪ A drug pusher! ♪ No, no, no. No! 1448 01:16:57,400 --> 01:17:00,667 "Ms. Norbury is a sad, old drug pusher"? 1449 01:17:02,234 --> 01:17:05,033 "Haley Fralenger has" ...what? 1450 01:17:05,167 --> 01:17:06,268 What's this? Hairy nips. 1451 01:17:08,167 --> 01:17:09,767 Good Lord. 1452 01:17:09,900 --> 01:17:12,801 ♪ Mmm, I want To make the world burn ♪ 1453 01:17:12,933 --> 01:17:15,201 ♪ Janis is a pyro-lez! ♪ 1454 01:17:15,333 --> 01:17:17,500 Don't you worry. We're gonna find out who did this. 1455 01:17:17,634 --> 01:17:20,433 There's only three girls in the whole school who aren't in it. 1456 01:17:20,567 --> 01:17:23,234 ♪ Regina is a fugly cow! ♪ 1457 01:17:23,367 --> 01:17:25,600 ♪ Regina is a fugly cow! ♪ 1458 01:17:25,734 --> 01:17:27,500 ♪ You wrote this ♪ 1459 01:17:27,634 --> 01:17:30,801 ♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa! ♪ 1460 01:17:30,933 --> 01:17:33,400 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1461 01:17:33,534 --> 01:17:35,866 ♪ I got the gasoline ♪ 1462 01:17:36,000 --> 01:17:38,433 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1463 01:17:38,567 --> 01:17:41,367 ♪ And everyone turn ♪ 1464 01:17:41,500 --> 01:17:46,066 ♪ Mean... Mean ♪ 1465 01:17:46,201 --> 01:17:51,467 ♪ Mean! ♪ 1466 01:17:51,600 --> 01:17:53,634 "Damian Hubbard is too gay to function"? 1467 01:17:53,767 --> 01:17:55,300 That is only okay when I say it. 1468 01:17:55,433 --> 01:17:56,966 Only Cady could have written that. 1469 01:18:01,400 --> 01:18:06,700 ♪ I want to watch The world burn ♪ 1470 01:18:06,833 --> 01:18:11,066 ♪ I want to make The world turn ♪ 1471 01:18:11,201 --> 01:18:16,400 ♪ So mean! ♪ 1472 01:18:16,534 --> 01:18:18,300 Oh, hell no! 1473 01:18:18,433 --> 01:18:22,066 I did not go to graduate school for this. 1474 01:18:22,201 --> 01:18:27,433 ♪ I want to watch The world burn! ♪ 1475 01:18:27,567 --> 01:18:33,168 All junior girls report to the gymnasium immediately! 1476 01:18:33,300 --> 01:18:35,000 Immediately! 1477 01:18:47,433 --> 01:18:50,467 Never in my 31 years as an educator 1478 01:18:50,600 --> 01:18:52,134 have I seen such behavior. 1479 01:18:52,268 --> 01:18:55,433 I have half a mind to cancel your Spring Fling dance! 1480 01:18:55,567 --> 01:18:57,500 No! I object. 1481 01:18:59,433 --> 01:19:00,600 But we're not gonna do that 1482 01:19:00,734 --> 01:19:02,367 because we've already paid the DJ. 1483 01:19:02,500 --> 01:19:07,168 But I am taking this "Burn Book" seriously. 1484 01:19:07,300 --> 01:19:09,433 Now who has something to say about this? 1485 01:19:17,766 --> 01:19:18,933 Someone wrote in that book 1486 01:19:19,067 --> 01:19:20,300 that I'm lying about being a virgin 1487 01:19:20,433 --> 01:19:22,866 because I use super-jumbo tampons. 1488 01:19:23,000 --> 01:19:25,300 But I can't help it if I have a heavy flow 1489 01:19:25,433 --> 01:19:26,833 and a wideset vagina. 1490 01:19:26,966 --> 01:19:30,933 Okay. Thank you. Hold that thought. 1491 01:19:31,933 --> 01:19:34,367 Sharon, you need to run this. Oh, come on. 1492 01:19:34,500 --> 01:19:36,067 I need to be able to tell parents 1493 01:19:36,201 --> 01:19:38,268 that we fixed this, and honestly, 1494 01:19:38,400 --> 01:19:40,067 you need to prove whoever called you 1495 01:19:40,201 --> 01:19:43,268 a drug pusher was just joking. 1496 01:19:43,400 --> 01:19:45,168 Okay, fine, but you are walking the dogs 1497 01:19:45,300 --> 01:19:47,201 every morning for the rest of the week. 1498 01:19:47,333 --> 01:19:48,900 Thank you. I love you. 1499 01:19:49,034 --> 01:19:50,667 I love you, too. 1500 01:19:55,766 --> 01:19:56,966 ♪ Well ♪ 1501 01:19:57,101 --> 01:19:59,000 Excuse me. 1502 01:20:00,433 --> 01:20:04,400 Well, okay, hotshots, 1503 01:20:05,067 --> 01:20:06,667 who wrote all this junk? 1504 01:20:09,201 --> 01:20:10,367 Cady? 1505 01:20:11,134 --> 01:20:12,800 Any ideas? 1506 01:20:15,134 --> 01:20:16,001 No. 1507 01:20:16,134 --> 01:20:17,500 Interesting. 1508 01:20:17,634 --> 01:20:19,067 Um, can I just say, 1509 01:20:19,201 --> 01:20:21,367 I don't think we have a clique problem at this school? 1510 01:20:21,500 --> 01:20:23,800 And some of us shouldn't have to participate 1511 01:20:23,933 --> 01:20:25,600 in whatever this is, 1512 01:20:25,733 --> 01:20:27,567 um, just because of a few bad people. 1513 01:20:27,699 --> 01:20:29,833 "A few bad people." Mm-hmm. 1514 01:20:29,966 --> 01:20:33,800 Okay. Well, let's unpack that. 1515 01:20:33,933 --> 01:20:36,534 I want everybody to close your eyes. 1516 01:20:38,567 --> 01:20:39,766 And I want you to raise your hand 1517 01:20:39,900 --> 01:20:41,933 if you have ever had a girl say something bad 1518 01:20:42,067 --> 01:20:43,467 about you behind your back. 1519 01:20:45,234 --> 01:20:47,600 Open your eyes. 1520 01:20:50,467 --> 01:20:52,234 Now close them again. 1521 01:20:52,367 --> 01:20:54,567 This time I want you to raise your hand 1522 01:20:54,699 --> 01:20:56,567 if you have ever said something bad 1523 01:20:56,699 --> 01:20:58,666 about a friend behind her back. 1524 01:21:07,433 --> 01:21:09,034 Open your eyes. 1525 01:21:12,367 --> 01:21:13,467 Hmm. 1526 01:21:13,600 --> 01:21:15,268 Seems like maybe we could take a break 1527 01:21:15,400 --> 01:21:18,234 from being victims in this situation 1528 01:21:18,367 --> 01:21:20,101 and start taking responsibility 1529 01:21:20,234 --> 01:21:21,866 for our own actions. 1530 01:21:22,001 --> 01:21:24,400 Okay, we're gonna write out some apologies 1531 01:21:24,534 --> 01:21:26,800 to people that we've hurt in our lives. 1532 01:21:26,934 --> 01:21:28,433 Everybody up. 1533 01:21:30,800 --> 01:21:32,934 I'm gonna kill you. 1534 01:21:33,067 --> 01:21:35,800 'Cause one thing I know for sure, guys: 1535 01:21:35,934 --> 01:21:39,766 Calling someone "ugly" is not gonna make you better looking. 1536 01:21:39,900 --> 01:21:43,433 Calling somebody else "stupid" does not make you any smarter. 1537 01:21:43,567 --> 01:21:46,168 And we as women have to be able to trust 1538 01:21:46,300 --> 01:21:48,866 and support each other. 1539 01:21:49,001 --> 01:21:50,034 Like this. 1540 01:21:53,633 --> 01:21:55,234 Okay, that was good. That was really good. 1541 01:21:55,367 --> 01:21:57,699 That could have really backfired. 1542 01:21:57,833 --> 01:21:59,001 Alyssa, 1543 01:21:59,134 --> 01:22:01,034 I'm sorry I said you look like you comb your hair 1544 01:22:01,168 --> 01:22:02,400 with a chicken bone. 1545 01:22:04,067 --> 01:22:06,300 I know you're vegetarian. 1546 01:22:09,400 --> 01:22:12,534 Gretchen, I'm sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea 1547 01:22:12,666 --> 01:22:14,666 on the Ferris wheel. 1548 01:22:14,800 --> 01:22:16,766 And I'm sorry for repeating it now. 1549 01:22:16,901 --> 01:22:19,067 And I'm sorry to the people who were below us. 1550 01:22:22,300 --> 01:22:23,400 Soona, 1551 01:22:23,534 --> 01:22:25,234 I'm sorry I said you were dragging 1552 01:22:25,367 --> 01:22:27,333 during "Revenge Party." 1553 01:22:27,467 --> 01:22:29,201 There was just, like, so much pressure on us 1554 01:22:29,333 --> 01:22:31,067 to move the story forward through montage. 1555 01:22:31,201 --> 01:22:32,168 Like, you know how it is. 1556 01:22:32,300 --> 01:22:34,534 What is going on? 1557 01:22:34,666 --> 01:22:35,800 Don't worry about it. 1558 01:22:35,934 --> 01:22:37,867 I just wish we could all get along 1559 01:22:38,001 --> 01:22:40,234 like we used to in elementary school. 1560 01:22:40,367 --> 01:22:42,599 I wish I could bake a cake 1561 01:22:42,733 --> 01:22:45,901 made out of rainbows and smiles. 1562 01:22:46,034 --> 01:22:48,566 Then we could all eat it and be happy. 1563 01:22:48,699 --> 01:22:51,333 She don't even go here! 1564 01:22:52,300 --> 01:22:53,967 Do you go to this school? 1565 01:22:54,101 --> 01:22:56,500 I'm here for a track meet. 1566 01:22:56,633 --> 01:22:58,766 I just have a lot of feelings! 1567 01:22:58,901 --> 01:23:01,001 Okay, sweetheart, you got to go home. 1568 01:23:03,034 --> 01:23:04,566 - Come on, we're gonna... - Oh, thank you. 1569 01:23:04,699 --> 01:23:06,533 ...we're gonna call your grown-up. 1570 01:23:07,101 --> 01:23:08,433 My turn, I guess. 1571 01:23:08,566 --> 01:23:10,433 Watch, this is either gonna be some really crappy art 1572 01:23:10,566 --> 01:23:11,967 or really good fire. 1573 01:23:19,400 --> 01:23:21,168 Okay, sure. 1574 01:23:21,300 --> 01:23:23,333 I have an apology. 1575 01:23:24,467 --> 01:23:26,367 My friend and I thought it would be fun 1576 01:23:26,499 --> 01:23:29,268 to mess up Regina George's life. 1577 01:23:29,400 --> 01:23:31,467 So we got these candy-bar things 1578 01:23:31,599 --> 01:23:33,201 to make her gain weight... 1579 01:23:33,333 --> 01:23:36,067 ...and we told her lard was face cream. 1580 01:23:37,499 --> 01:23:40,733 And we turned her best friends against her. 1581 01:23:41,533 --> 01:23:43,201 And then my friend Cady... 1582 01:23:43,333 --> 01:23:45,699 Yeah, you all know my friend Cady. 1583 01:23:45,834 --> 01:23:50,733 She got Regina's boyfriend to dump her! 1584 01:23:50,867 --> 01:23:52,499 Oh! 1585 01:23:52,633 --> 01:23:53,801 And it turns out, 1586 01:23:53,934 --> 01:23:55,901 Cady's actually just as selfish 1587 01:23:56,034 --> 01:23:58,767 and phony as Regina George. 1588 01:24:00,268 --> 01:24:02,499 So this apology is to myself. 1589 01:24:03,533 --> 01:24:05,566 Because I should've known better. 1590 01:24:06,901 --> 01:24:08,466 ♪ So your best friend Screwed you over ♪ 1591 01:24:08,599 --> 01:24:10,268 ♪ Acted nice when She's not nice ♪ 1592 01:24:10,400 --> 01:24:12,001 ♪ Well, I have some advice ♪ 1593 01:24:12,134 --> 01:24:13,967 ♪ 'Cause it's happened To me twice ♪ 1594 01:24:14,101 --> 01:24:17,201 ♪ Here's my secret strategy It always works because ♪ 1595 01:24:17,333 --> 01:24:20,333 ♪ The world doesn't end It just feels like it does ♪ 1596 01:24:20,466 --> 01:24:23,499 ♪ Just raise your right finger ♪ 1597 01:24:23,633 --> 01:24:27,767 ♪ And solemnly swear ♪ 1598 01:24:27,901 --> 01:24:31,134 ♪ Whatever they say about me ♪ 1599 01:24:31,268 --> 01:24:34,300 ♪ I don't care ♪ 1600 01:24:34,432 --> 01:24:36,432 ♪ I won't twist in knots To join your game ♪ 1601 01:24:36,566 --> 01:24:38,300 ♪ I will say "You make me mad" ♪ 1602 01:24:38,432 --> 01:24:41,466 ♪ And if you treat me bad I'll say, "You're bad" ♪ 1603 01:24:41,599 --> 01:24:43,432 ♪ If I eat alone From this moment on ♪ 1604 01:24:43,566 --> 01:24:45,168 ♪ That's just what I'll do ♪ 1605 01:24:45,300 --> 01:24:48,499 ♪ 'Cause I'd rather be me I'd rather be me ♪ 1606 01:24:48,633 --> 01:24:51,168 ♪ I'd rather be me ♪ 1607 01:24:51,300 --> 01:24:53,801 ♪ Than be with you ♪ 1608 01:24:59,067 --> 01:25:00,734 ♪ We're supposed To all be ladies ♪ 1609 01:25:00,867 --> 01:25:02,633 ♪ And be nurturing and care ♪ 1610 01:25:02,767 --> 01:25:04,134 ♪ Is that really fair? ♪ 1611 01:25:04,268 --> 01:25:05,967 ♪ Boys get to fight We have to share ♪ 1612 01:25:06,101 --> 01:25:07,333 ♪ Here's the way that That turns out ♪ 1613 01:25:07,466 --> 01:25:09,234 ♪ We always understand ♪ 1614 01:25:09,367 --> 01:25:12,432 ♪ How to slap someone down With our underhand ♪ 1615 01:25:12,566 --> 01:25:16,268 ♪ So here is my right finger ♪ 1616 01:25:16,399 --> 01:25:19,700 ♪ To how girls should behave ♪ 1617 01:25:19,834 --> 01:25:23,367 ♪ 'Cause sometimes What's meant to break you ♪ 1618 01:25:23,499 --> 01:25:26,499 ♪ Makes you brave ♪ 1619 01:25:26,633 --> 01:25:29,901 ♪ So I will not act all innocent I won't fake apologize ♪ 1620 01:25:30,034 --> 01:25:31,734 ♪ Let's just fight And then make up ♪ 1621 01:25:31,867 --> 01:25:33,666 ♪ Not tell these lies ♪ 1622 01:25:33,801 --> 01:25:35,466 ♪ Let's call our damage even ♪ 1623 01:25:35,599 --> 01:25:37,300 ♪ Clean the slate Till it's like new ♪ 1624 01:25:37,432 --> 01:25:40,700 ♪ It's a new life for me Where I'd rather be me ♪ 1625 01:25:40,834 --> 01:25:43,300 ♪ I'd rather be me ♪ 1626 01:25:43,432 --> 01:25:45,767 ♪ Than be with you ♪ 1627 01:25:47,234 --> 01:25:48,967 ♪ I'll say, "No" ♪ ♪ No! ♪ 1628 01:25:49,101 --> 01:25:50,599 ♪ I'll say, "Knock it off With your notes ♪ 1629 01:25:50,734 --> 01:25:52,667 ♪ And your rules And your games" ♪ 1630 01:25:52,801 --> 01:25:54,801 ♪ And those sycophants Who follow you I'll remember all their names ♪ 1631 01:25:54,934 --> 01:25:58,034 ♪ And when they drag you down Like they inevitably do ♪ 1632 01:25:58,168 --> 01:25:59,901 ♪ I will not laugh along With them ♪ 1633 01:26:00,034 --> 01:26:01,366 ♪ And approve Their palace coup ♪ 1634 01:26:01,499 --> 01:26:03,399 ♪ 'Cause that's not me ♪ 1635 01:26:05,134 --> 01:26:06,700 ♪ I don't need Their good opinions ♪ 1636 01:26:06,834 --> 01:26:08,834 ♪ I've got plenty of opinions ♪ 1637 01:26:08,967 --> 01:26:12,001 ♪ Every asshole has opinions But it doesn't make 'em true ♪ 1638 01:26:12,134 --> 01:26:15,566 ♪ What's true is being me And I'd rather be me ♪ 1639 01:26:15,700 --> 01:26:17,967 ♪ I'd rather be me ♪ 1640 01:26:18,101 --> 01:26:20,801 ♪ Than be with you ♪ 1641 01:26:22,101 --> 01:26:26,001 ♪ So raise 'em high 'Cause playing nice and shy ♪ 1642 01:26:26,134 --> 01:26:30,168 ♪ Is insulting my IQ ♪ 1643 01:26:30,300 --> 01:26:33,734 ♪ I'd rather be me I'd rather be me ♪ 1644 01:26:33,867 --> 01:26:37,268 ♪ I'd rather be me Than be with you ♪ 1645 01:26:37,399 --> 01:26:38,834 Walk away, turd. 1646 01:26:38,967 --> 01:26:41,667 Regina, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you! 1647 01:26:41,801 --> 01:26:44,067 You are a lowlife version of me... 1648 01:26:44,201 --> 01:26:47,667 ♪ I'd rather be me I'd rather be me ♪ 1649 01:26:47,801 --> 01:26:53,134 ♪ I'd rather be me Than be with ♪ 1650 01:26:53,268 --> 01:26:56,801 ♪ You! ♪ 1651 01:27:04,801 --> 01:27:07,801 And that's how Regina George died. 1652 01:27:07,934 --> 01:27:11,168 Again, no one died! 1653 01:27:11,299 --> 01:27:14,168 I mean, technically, Regina did die for, like, 15 seconds 1654 01:27:14,299 --> 01:27:15,901 but then she was revived. 1655 01:27:16,034 --> 01:27:19,067 And of course, the rumor mill started going insane. 1656 01:27:19,201 --> 01:27:21,466 I just saw Regina get hit by a bus. 1657 01:27:21,600 --> 01:27:23,967 An artery come out of her neck and her head went all the way around! 1658 01:27:24,101 --> 01:27:25,600 Guys, street safety is so important. 1659 01:27:25,734 --> 01:27:27,734 I'm just sad, like, that's all I can say. 1660 01:27:31,634 --> 01:27:33,366 We are sending our love and prayers... 1661 01:27:33,499 --> 01:27:35,700 Link in bio to my GoFundMe page to raise money. 1662 01:27:35,834 --> 01:27:37,101 Regina, we knew you would pull through. 1663 01:27:37,234 --> 01:27:38,567 How do I get this off my algorithm? 1664 01:27:38,700 --> 01:27:40,299 I'm not one to spread rumors, 1665 01:27:40,432 --> 01:27:42,600 but I'm pretty sure I saw Cady push her right in front of it. 1666 01:27:42,734 --> 01:27:44,567 On my life, Cady pushed her. 1667 01:27:44,700 --> 01:27:46,967 I literally saw Cady push Regina. 1668 01:27:47,101 --> 01:27:48,901 Don't fill up my comments, but... karma. 1669 01:27:49,034 --> 01:27:52,201 Girls are made deranged by what's called hormones. 1670 01:27:52,332 --> 01:27:53,466 Hormones. 1671 01:27:53,600 --> 01:27:58,299 W-H-O-R... 1672 01:28:03,834 --> 01:28:06,399 - F that bitch. - F that wench. 1673 01:28:13,534 --> 01:28:14,867 All right. 1674 01:28:15,001 --> 01:28:19,101 Ms. Norbury is on a, uh, temporary leave of absence. 1675 01:28:19,233 --> 01:28:20,634 Jail. Hey. 1676 01:28:20,767 --> 01:28:23,399 I heard that, Miss Rockwell. 1677 01:28:23,534 --> 01:28:26,134 Anyways, we're not sure who your substitute... 1678 01:28:26,267 --> 01:28:28,299 I did it. 1679 01:28:30,168 --> 01:28:33,567 I wrote that Ms. Norbury is a drug pusher, and it's a lie. 1680 01:28:43,767 --> 01:28:46,634 Three-week suspension. 1681 01:28:46,767 --> 01:28:50,101 This is not who I know you to be. 1682 01:28:50,233 --> 01:28:51,399 I know. 1683 01:28:55,399 --> 01:28:56,700 Where is my Ndebele vase? 1684 01:28:56,834 --> 01:28:59,734 - What? - What do you mean, what? 1685 01:28:59,867 --> 01:29:02,767 You know, the colorful vase that's always in that window. 1686 01:29:02,901 --> 01:29:04,366 Where is it? 1687 01:29:08,567 --> 01:29:11,567 I had some friends over when you were away. 1688 01:29:11,700 --> 01:29:12,801 Go. 1689 01:29:12,934 --> 01:29:14,299 Go do your homework! 1690 01:29:14,432 --> 01:29:16,600 Um, also... 1691 01:29:17,834 --> 01:29:20,200 I need you to sign my Calculus test, 1692 01:29:20,332 --> 01:29:21,700 'cause I'm failing. 1693 01:29:52,634 --> 01:29:53,967 Hey. 1694 01:29:54,101 --> 01:29:57,433 I guess you'll need this back to set an alarm for tomorrow. 1695 01:29:58,067 --> 01:29:59,500 Don't want it. 1696 01:29:59,634 --> 01:30:01,700 You only have one message. 1697 01:30:01,834 --> 01:30:04,433 From someone named Karen, who says: 1698 01:30:04,567 --> 01:30:07,867 "Donut worry. I am still your freend." 1699 01:30:12,167 --> 01:30:14,233 How bad is it gonna be tomorrow? 1700 01:30:14,366 --> 01:30:16,034 I was thinking maybe I should go back 1701 01:30:16,167 --> 01:30:17,567 to being homeschooled. 1702 01:30:17,700 --> 01:30:18,667 Sweetie, no. 1703 01:30:18,801 --> 01:30:20,433 It's too small, me and you. 1704 01:30:20,567 --> 01:30:22,400 And I think you're learning things now 1705 01:30:22,534 --> 01:30:24,600 that I don't know how to teach. 1706 01:30:30,801 --> 01:30:32,332 Good night. 1707 01:30:33,167 --> 01:30:34,967 Mom? Hmm? 1708 01:30:36,567 --> 01:30:40,834 Can you sit with me till I fall asleep? 1709 01:30:41,467 --> 01:30:42,667 Mm-hmm. 1710 01:30:54,001 --> 01:30:56,299 Oh, sweetie. 1711 01:31:16,333 --> 01:31:18,634 Oh, hi. Did you want to buy some drugs? 1712 01:31:18,767 --> 01:31:21,467 No, I was just handing my quiz back. 1713 01:31:21,600 --> 01:31:24,299 You know, when the police tore apart my house 1714 01:31:24,433 --> 01:31:25,867 looking for imaginary heroin, 1715 01:31:26,001 --> 01:31:29,001 I found this old calculator that I thought I lost, so... 1716 01:31:29,133 --> 01:31:30,734 totally worth it. 1717 01:31:31,433 --> 01:31:32,767 I'm really sorry. 1718 01:31:32,901 --> 01:31:34,133 Thank you. 1719 01:31:34,267 --> 01:31:36,233 But I know you didn't write that whole book yourself. 1720 01:31:36,367 --> 01:31:37,867 You gonna tell Mr. Duvall who did? 1721 01:31:39,100 --> 01:31:40,299 No. 1722 01:31:40,433 --> 01:31:42,367 Trying this new thing where I don't talk 1723 01:31:42,500 --> 01:31:43,801 about people behind their backs. 1724 01:31:43,934 --> 01:31:47,467 Getting hit by a bus seems like enough punishment. 1725 01:31:48,534 --> 01:31:51,000 100. Welcome back, nerd. 1726 01:31:52,767 --> 01:31:55,200 Will you be attending the Spring Fling this weekend? 1727 01:31:55,333 --> 01:31:57,467 No. Everyone hates me. 1728 01:31:57,600 --> 01:31:59,867 Perfect, because I figured out a way for you 1729 01:32:00,000 --> 01:32:01,133 to earn some extra credit. 1730 01:32:01,267 --> 01:32:02,767 Hey, Bird, you ready to suit up 1731 01:32:02,901 --> 01:32:04,834 and show off your math schquills? 1732 01:32:04,967 --> 01:32:06,867 Kev, stop trying to make "schquills" happen. It's not gonna happen. 1733 01:32:07,000 --> 01:32:10,400 Jacob, get off my dick. Hey! PG-13, please. 1734 01:32:27,801 --> 01:32:30,367 Welcome to the ICMT State Math Championships. 1735 01:32:30,500 --> 01:32:32,268 Sponsored by SeatGeek. 1736 01:32:32,400 --> 01:32:33,801 Yeah, SeatGeek! 1737 01:32:33,934 --> 01:32:35,500 Tonight will be the culmination 1738 01:32:35,634 --> 01:32:38,433 of all you've worked for. 1739 01:32:38,567 --> 01:32:40,500 Each right answer will be worth two points. 1740 01:32:40,634 --> 01:32:44,268 The highest score at the end of 40 minutes of play wins. 1741 01:32:44,400 --> 01:32:47,467 As always, no calculators. 1742 01:32:48,500 --> 01:32:51,333 Question one. Two, three, four! 1743 01:32:56,300 --> 01:32:59,367 Determine the equation of the tangent line to the graph. 1744 01:33:00,700 --> 01:33:02,734 - The answer is B. - Correct. 1745 01:33:02,867 --> 01:33:05,734 Solve the equation above using prime numbers. 1746 01:33:05,867 --> 01:33:08,033 Prime factor 41. 1747 01:33:08,167 --> 01:33:09,467 Correct. 1748 01:33:09,600 --> 01:33:11,268 Please solve for x. 1749 01:33:11,400 --> 01:33:13,500 - x = 2? - Incorrect. 1750 01:33:13,634 --> 01:33:15,268 x is greater than the value of y. 1751 01:33:15,400 --> 01:33:17,367 Correct. 1752 01:33:18,600 --> 01:33:20,700 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1753 01:33:20,834 --> 01:33:23,500 ♪ I didn't get it ♪ 1754 01:33:23,634 --> 01:33:27,734 ♪ I didn't get it, somehow ♪ 1755 01:33:27,867 --> 01:33:31,700 ♪ Smart with math But stupid with love ♪ 1756 01:33:31,834 --> 01:33:34,000 ♪ I didn't get it ♪ 1757 01:33:34,133 --> 01:33:35,167 Negative two! 1758 01:33:35,300 --> 01:33:36,234 Correct. 1759 01:33:36,367 --> 01:33:38,333 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1760 01:33:39,867 --> 01:33:42,167 ♪ Whoa-oa-oa Stupid with love ♪ 1761 01:33:42,300 --> 01:33:44,700 = mx + c. Correct. 1762 01:33:44,834 --> 01:33:46,966 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1763 01:33:48,634 --> 01:33:50,201 ♪ Whoa-oa-oa Stupid with love ♪ 1764 01:33:50,333 --> 01:33:51,667 Both polynomials are second degree, 1765 01:33:51,801 --> 01:33:53,333 so the asymptote is at y = 5. 1766 01:33:53,467 --> 01:33:54,900 Excellent. 1767 01:33:55,033 --> 01:33:56,600 ♪ I feel my brain Begin to rust ♪ 1768 01:33:56,734 --> 01:33:58,734 ♪ I am filled with calcu-lust ♪ 1769 01:33:58,866 --> 01:34:00,700 ♪ Does this guy work out? He must ♪ 1770 01:34:00,834 --> 01:34:02,900 ♪ All sweaty at the gym ♪ 1771 01:34:03,033 --> 01:34:07,133 ♪ Could that image be more hot? Let me just enjoy That thought ♪ 1772 01:34:07,268 --> 01:34:08,534 ♪ School was rough ♪ 1773 01:34:08,667 --> 01:34:09,634 ♪ But now it's not ♪ 1774 01:34:09,767 --> 01:34:10,866 Negative four? 1775 01:34:11,000 --> 01:34:12,168 True. 1776 01:34:12,300 --> 01:34:13,333 29? 1777 01:34:13,467 --> 01:34:14,467 The slope is zero. 1778 01:34:14,600 --> 01:34:15,734 Incorrect. 1779 01:34:15,866 --> 01:34:17,333 The slope of the tangent line is four. 1780 01:34:17,467 --> 01:34:20,033 Excellent. 1781 01:34:20,168 --> 01:34:22,734 Well, this has only ever happened once before. 1782 01:34:22,866 --> 01:34:26,066 Ladies and gentlemen, we have a tie. 1783 01:34:28,333 --> 01:34:29,567 In the event of a tie, 1784 01:34:29,700 --> 01:34:32,268 we move into a one-on-one sudden-death round 1785 01:34:32,400 --> 01:34:34,634 where each team may choose their opponent. 1786 01:34:41,066 --> 01:34:42,667 We pick the girl. 1787 01:34:44,268 --> 01:34:46,000 We pick the girl, too. 1788 01:34:48,667 --> 01:34:51,134 Ms. Krafft, Ms. Heron, please step forward. 1789 01:35:07,700 --> 01:35:10,600 Nice to meet you. Whatever, slut. 1790 01:35:10,734 --> 01:35:14,500 Contestants, please find the limit of this expression. 1791 01:35:18,866 --> 01:35:20,800 You know, it's not me against you. 1792 01:35:20,933 --> 01:35:24,500 It's North Shore versus Marymount. 1793 01:35:25,400 --> 01:35:27,268 A very wise teacher... 1794 01:35:27,400 --> 01:35:28,966 The limit is negative one. 1795 01:35:30,367 --> 01:35:32,333 That answer is incorrect. 1796 01:35:34,333 --> 01:35:37,333 If Ms. Heron can answer correctly, we have a winner. 1797 01:35:37,467 --> 01:35:40,000 You got this, Golf Bird. 1798 01:35:40,134 --> 01:35:43,201 Why can't I remember anything about limits? 1799 01:35:43,333 --> 01:35:45,500 Honey, I don't know your life. 1800 01:35:46,833 --> 01:35:48,833 Why did you waste time insulting me? 1801 01:35:48,966 --> 01:35:50,966 Why did I waste time judging your hair? 1802 01:35:51,101 --> 01:35:52,833 This is not a competition. 1803 01:35:53,534 --> 01:35:55,300 It kind of is, though. 1804 01:35:55,433 --> 01:35:57,067 Right. 1805 01:35:57,966 --> 01:35:59,433 A math one. 1806 01:36:00,600 --> 01:36:02,667 ♪ I was stupid ♪ 1807 01:36:03,634 --> 01:36:05,168 ♪ But now I get it ♪ 1808 01:36:05,300 --> 01:36:09,433 ♪ No what ifs, might haves Could have been if I had ♪ 1809 01:36:09,567 --> 01:36:11,733 ♪ Only tried, not held back ♪ 1810 01:36:11,866 --> 01:36:14,000 ♪ That's not a part of my plan ♪ 1811 01:36:14,134 --> 01:36:16,067 ♪ I see the things That I missed ♪ 1812 01:36:16,201 --> 01:36:18,367 ♪ No, that's not the me That I am ♪ 1813 01:36:18,500 --> 01:36:21,833 ♪ The limit It doesn't exist! ♪ 1814 01:36:22,667 --> 01:36:24,333 The limit does not exist. 1815 01:36:24,467 --> 01:36:27,333 Our new state champions, the North Shore Mathletes. 1816 01:36:31,600 --> 01:36:33,067 Yeah, you like that, Marymount? 1817 01:36:33,201 --> 01:36:35,400 Get some! Get some! 1818 01:36:35,534 --> 01:36:37,168 Don't hold me back! Don't hold me back! 1819 01:36:37,300 --> 01:36:39,134 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1820 01:36:39,800 --> 01:36:41,534 ♪ But now I get it ♪ 1821 01:36:41,667 --> 01:36:44,001 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1822 01:36:44,134 --> 01:36:46,134 ♪ But now I get it ♪ 1823 01:36:46,268 --> 01:36:47,966 ♪ Stupid with love ♪ 1824 01:36:48,101 --> 01:36:51,534 ♪ But now I get it Stupid! ♪ 1825 01:36:52,001 --> 01:36:52,866 Have you seen Jason? 1826 01:36:53,001 --> 01:36:55,134 Like right now or like ever in life? 1827 01:36:55,268 --> 01:36:56,600 Ohhh, miss! 1828 01:36:56,733 --> 01:36:58,933 I'm supposed to hang with my fallback in there 1829 01:36:59,067 --> 01:37:00,534 but, you know, if you wanted to slip out, 1830 01:37:00,667 --> 01:37:02,866 meet in my Jeep or... Jason! 1831 01:37:03,001 --> 01:37:04,234 It's me! 1832 01:37:04,367 --> 01:37:05,634 "Fallback"? 1833 01:37:05,766 --> 01:37:08,034 No, I... I know. Yeah, I knew the whole time. 1834 01:37:08,168 --> 01:37:10,134 No, we are done! 1835 01:37:10,268 --> 01:37:11,300 Because you know what? 1836 01:37:11,433 --> 01:37:15,300 I have a 140 IQ, very toned legs, 1837 01:37:15,433 --> 01:37:17,367 and my parents love me! 1838 01:37:17,500 --> 01:37:19,433 And you will regret this when you're old 1839 01:37:19,567 --> 01:37:21,833 because I am fricking fetch! 1840 01:37:21,967 --> 01:37:24,900 That's how you use it. Come on. 1841 01:37:26,766 --> 01:37:28,866 Okay, attention, everybody. 1842 01:37:29,666 --> 01:37:32,800 Whoo-hoo-hoo, let's go! 1843 01:37:40,067 --> 01:37:41,300 Regina! 1844 01:37:44,101 --> 01:37:45,733 You look pretty. 1845 01:37:47,833 --> 01:37:50,367 I'm wearing a corrective neck collar. 1846 01:37:56,367 --> 01:37:59,733 I'm sorry about the bus. I feel like it's all my fault. 1847 01:37:59,866 --> 01:38:02,067 No... No, it's not your fault. 1848 01:38:02,201 --> 01:38:04,833 Cady, don't apologize for things that aren't your fault. 1849 01:38:04,967 --> 01:38:07,766 But, yeah, I forgive you, 'cause... 1850 01:38:09,467 --> 01:38:11,234 I'm on a lot of pain medication right now. 1851 01:38:11,367 --> 01:38:14,034 You know I died for 15 seconds? 1852 01:38:14,168 --> 01:38:15,400 Yeah. 1853 01:38:16,699 --> 01:38:20,800 Anyway, my mom was really pumped to be on the news. 1854 01:38:21,967 --> 01:38:23,400 It's weird when people treat you 1855 01:38:23,534 --> 01:38:24,633 like you're famous or something. 1856 01:38:27,268 --> 01:38:28,733 Until it's not. 1857 01:38:30,168 --> 01:38:34,500 Look, I... I know I have to change. 1858 01:38:35,400 --> 01:38:37,433 And I was harsh. 1859 01:38:37,567 --> 01:38:39,034 And people say that I'm a bitch. 1860 01:38:39,168 --> 01:38:41,934 You know what they would call me if I was a boy? 1861 01:38:42,067 --> 01:38:44,699 Strong. "Reginald." 1862 01:38:44,833 --> 01:38:48,633 That's what my mom was gonna name me if I was a boy, so... 1863 01:38:48,766 --> 01:38:51,967 Honestly, I would rather be "bitch." 1864 01:38:57,867 --> 01:38:59,699 I like you. 1865 01:38:59,833 --> 01:39:02,599 But this medicine makes me like everyone, so... 1866 01:39:02,733 --> 01:39:04,833 Okay, do we have all of our nominees 1867 01:39:04,967 --> 01:39:07,566 for the Spring Fling King and Queen onstage? 1868 01:39:07,699 --> 01:39:09,833 I just want to say you're all winners. 1869 01:39:09,967 --> 01:39:15,201 And I am retiring as soon as this evening is over. 1870 01:39:16,599 --> 01:39:19,268 The winner of the Spring Fling King is... 1871 01:39:19,433 --> 01:39:21,134 Shane Oman. 1872 01:39:23,268 --> 01:39:24,967 Whoo! Yeah! 1873 01:39:28,268 --> 01:39:29,500 Hey. 1874 01:39:30,967 --> 01:39:32,867 Um, have you seen Janis? 1875 01:39:33,001 --> 01:39:34,867 Every day since 2009. 1876 01:39:35,001 --> 01:39:36,467 But she doesn't want to see you. 1877 01:39:36,599 --> 01:39:39,168 And your Spring Fling Queen... 1878 01:39:39,300 --> 01:39:41,800 Damian, I'm... I'm really sorry. 1879 01:39:41,934 --> 01:39:44,268 Cady Heron. 1880 01:39:44,400 --> 01:39:46,834 What? I mean, of course she is. 1881 01:39:49,467 --> 01:39:51,333 Go, Cady! 1882 01:39:52,800 --> 01:39:54,001 Where is Cady? 1883 01:40:08,433 --> 01:40:09,834 Congratulations. 1884 01:40:13,834 --> 01:40:14,867 Um... 1885 01:40:16,034 --> 01:40:17,699 I think people voted for me 1886 01:40:17,834 --> 01:40:19,300 because they think I pushed someone 1887 01:40:19,433 --> 01:40:20,599 in front of a bus. 1888 01:40:20,733 --> 01:40:24,300 It's not your fault. A bus pushed me. 1889 01:40:27,967 --> 01:40:31,067 But what is my fault is 1890 01:40:31,201 --> 01:40:32,834 the way I treated my friends. 1891 01:40:34,268 --> 01:40:37,699 I used you and I lied to you and I'm... I'm so sorry. 1892 01:40:41,101 --> 01:40:43,499 I'm also sorry to everyone 1893 01:40:43,633 --> 01:40:45,566 whose feelings got hurt from the Burn Book. 1894 01:40:45,699 --> 01:40:47,234 You know, it's really not required 1895 01:40:47,367 --> 01:40:48,733 for you to make a speech. 1896 01:40:48,867 --> 01:40:51,134 Right. Almost done, I promise. Um... 1897 01:40:52,067 --> 01:40:55,901 I think everyone looks like royalty tonight. 1898 01:40:56,034 --> 01:41:01,867 It just seems weird for one person to win this. 1899 01:41:04,367 --> 01:41:07,300 I mean, it's just a chunk of plastic. 1900 01:41:09,300 --> 01:41:11,901 We could just share it. 1901 01:41:15,767 --> 01:41:19,901 ♪ Cheap, fake Easy to break ♪ 1902 01:41:20,034 --> 01:41:22,967 ♪ That's how I used to be ♪ 1903 01:41:23,101 --> 01:41:25,599 Here... Take it. 1904 01:41:25,734 --> 01:41:27,901 ♪ Now I'm awake ♪ 1905 01:41:28,034 --> 01:41:30,633 ♪ I'll tell you what I see ♪ 1906 01:41:30,767 --> 01:41:33,666 ♪ Plastic don't shine Glitter don't shine ♪ 1907 01:41:33,801 --> 01:41:37,767 ♪ Rhinestones don't shine The way you do ♪ 1908 01:41:37,901 --> 01:41:41,067 ♪ You are so real You are so rare ♪ 1909 01:41:41,201 --> 01:41:43,967 ♪ I see you there ♪ 1910 01:41:44,101 --> 01:41:47,533 ♪ I see you ♪ 1911 01:41:47,666 --> 01:41:49,767 ♪ I see stars ♪ 1912 01:41:49,901 --> 01:41:53,268 ♪ So many stars tonight ♪ 1913 01:41:53,399 --> 01:41:57,432 ♪ You could make diamonds dull ♪ 1914 01:41:57,566 --> 01:42:01,168 ♪ You are so beautiful ♪ 1915 01:42:01,300 --> 01:42:03,867 ♪ I see stars ♪ 1916 01:42:04,001 --> 01:42:07,566 ♪ You shine as bright as day ♪ 1917 01:42:07,700 --> 01:42:10,700 ♪ I will look out for you ♪ 1918 01:42:10,834 --> 01:42:14,533 ♪ We'll light each other's way ♪ 1919 01:42:14,666 --> 01:42:18,967 ♪ You're all stars ♪ 1920 01:42:20,633 --> 01:42:22,300 All right, have a good time, everyone. 1921 01:42:22,432 --> 01:42:23,333 No vaping. 1922 01:42:23,466 --> 01:42:24,533 Rachel Hamilton! 1923 01:42:24,667 --> 01:42:25,901 Give me that inhaler. 1924 01:42:40,533 --> 01:42:42,300 Are you still mad at me? 1925 01:42:42,432 --> 01:42:44,934 I don't know. Are you still an asshole? 1926 01:42:45,633 --> 01:42:47,366 I don't think so? 1927 01:42:53,432 --> 01:42:54,967 Cute. 1928 01:42:56,499 --> 01:42:59,067 ♪ Wherever darkness falls ♪ 1929 01:42:59,201 --> 01:43:04,234 ♪ I'll be the light ♪ 1930 01:43:04,366 --> 01:43:07,901 ♪ To guide you home ♪ 1931 01:43:08,034 --> 01:43:10,101 She sounds good. 1932 01:43:10,901 --> 01:43:13,399 But she does not go here, y'all. 1933 01:43:13,533 --> 01:43:16,566 Would you look over there? Oh, my gosh! 1934 01:43:18,634 --> 01:43:20,967 Do you want to dance? Yeah. 1935 01:43:25,600 --> 01:43:28,566 Congrats on winning state. The jacket looks, uh, really good on you. 1936 01:43:28,700 --> 01:43:32,299 Thanks. It has a pocket inside for a calculator. 1937 01:43:32,432 --> 01:43:33,734 What? Yeah. 1938 01:43:33,867 --> 01:43:34,867 Grool. 1939 01:43:36,299 --> 01:43:37,767 Grool. 1940 01:43:40,299 --> 01:43:43,399 ♪ You stars ♪ 1941 01:43:43,533 --> 01:43:47,067 ♪ So many stars tonight ♪ 1942 01:43:47,201 --> 01:43:49,767 ♪ I see stars ♪ 1943 01:43:49,901 --> 01:43:51,499 And that was the first time in history 1944 01:43:51,634 --> 01:43:53,901 that Spring Fling was actually fun. 1945 01:43:54,034 --> 01:43:58,634 Ms. Norbury and Mr. Duvall got wasted. JK, JK. 1946 01:43:58,767 --> 01:44:01,432 Karen discovered the safe joy 1947 01:44:01,567 --> 01:44:04,533 of dancing with theater boys. 1948 01:44:04,667 --> 01:44:08,399 And Plastics and Jocks partied with math nerds. 1949 01:44:08,533 --> 01:44:10,067 Janis danced to a pop song 1950 01:44:10,201 --> 01:44:11,934 and didn't burst into flames. 1951 01:44:12,600 --> 01:44:14,466 Ow. Ow. Ow! 1952 01:44:14,600 --> 01:44:17,767 And everyone else just kind of floated. 1953 01:44:19,934 --> 01:44:22,101 So the moral of our story is thus: 1954 01:44:22,234 --> 01:44:24,600 Calling someone stupid won't make you any smarter. 1955 01:44:24,734 --> 01:44:26,634 And even the people you really don't like 1956 01:44:26,767 --> 01:44:29,233 are still people who just want to coexist. 1957 01:44:29,366 --> 01:44:31,934 So get off their dicks! 1958 01:44:34,867 --> 01:44:36,934 ♪ I see ♪ 1959 01:44:37,067 --> 01:44:40,801 ♪ Stars! ♪ 1960 01:44:44,934 --> 01:44:46,567 ♪ Where she at? What she doing? ♪ 1961 01:44:46,700 --> 01:44:48,567 ♪ Who she with And where she from? ♪ 1962 01:44:48,700 --> 01:44:50,499 ♪ Well, she's this Oh, she's that ♪ 1963 01:44:50,634 --> 01:44:52,734 ♪ She's a flight risk On the run ♪ 1964 01:44:52,867 --> 01:44:54,567 ♪ She's back, she's back ♪ 1965 01:44:54,700 --> 01:44:56,466 ♪ Yeah, I'm back, bitch Are you done? ♪ 1966 01:44:56,600 --> 01:45:00,200 ♪ Excuse me While I bite my tongue ♪ 1967 01:45:00,332 --> 01:45:04,233 ♪ I'm back on that same shit From before ♪ 1968 01:45:04,366 --> 01:45:07,967 ♪ I can't take this pettiness Now I'm bored ♪ 1969 01:45:08,101 --> 01:45:12,168 ♪ We can champagne There's enough for us all ♪ 1970 01:45:12,299 --> 01:45:15,168 ♪ Told you who I am And what it is It's not my fault ♪ 1971 01:45:15,299 --> 01:45:19,200 ♪ It's not my fault You came with her But she might leave with me ♪ 1972 01:45:19,332 --> 01:45:23,101 ♪ It's not my fault You've got to pay For what I get for free ♪ 1973 01:45:23,233 --> 01:45:25,067 ♪ It's not my fault ♪ 1974 01:45:25,200 --> 01:45:27,067 ♪ You're like, you're like You're like in love with me ♪ 1975 01:45:27,200 --> 01:45:29,233 ♪ It's not my fault You're like in love with me ♪ 1976 01:45:29,366 --> 01:45:31,299 ♪ You're like in love with me ♪ 1977 01:45:31,432 --> 01:45:34,967 ♪ Get her number, get her name Get a good thing While you can ♪ 1978 01:45:35,101 --> 01:45:39,200 ♪ Kiss a blonde, kiss a friend Can a gay girl get an amen? ♪ 1979 01:45:39,332 --> 01:45:42,734 ♪ I'm back on that same shit From before ♪ 1980 01:45:42,867 --> 01:45:46,634 ♪ I can't take this pettiness Now I'm bored ♪ 1981 01:45:46,767 --> 01:45:50,700 ♪ We can champagne There's enough for us all ♪ 1982 01:45:50,834 --> 01:45:52,867 ♪ I told you who I am And what it is ♪ 1983 01:45:53,001 --> 01:45:55,299 ♪ It's not my fault It's not my fault ♪ 1984 01:45:55,432 --> 01:45:57,734 ♪ You came with her But she might leave with me ♪ 1985 01:45:57,867 --> 01:45:59,634 ♪ It's not my fault ♪ 1986 01:45:59,767 --> 01:46:02,067 ♪ You've got to pay For what I get for free ♪ 1987 01:46:02,200 --> 01:46:05,734 ♪ It's not my fault You're like, you're like You're like in love with me ♪ 1988 01:46:05,867 --> 01:46:08,332 ♪ It's not my fault You're like in love with me ♪ 1989 01:46:08,467 --> 01:46:10,133 ♪ You're like in love with me ♪ 1990 01:46:10,267 --> 01:46:12,034 ♪ I mean, who wouldn't want To be in love with me ♪ 1991 01:46:12,167 --> 01:46:14,034 ♪ I'm a mood board Girls got to Pinterest me ♪ 1992 01:46:14,167 --> 01:46:16,067 ♪ I'm a stallion but they come And f... me like Trojan ♪ 1993 01:46:16,200 --> 01:46:18,299 ♪ And it wouldn't be me If I ain't cause commotion ♪ 1994 01:46:18,433 --> 01:46:21,001 ♪ I'm so bad Dudes thought I was AI I ballin' like AI ♪ 1995 01:46:21,133 --> 01:46:23,600 ♪ I stick to a whole lot Of paper like a stapler Stack like Jenga ♪ 1996 01:46:23,734 --> 01:46:25,332 ♪ And you basic bitch Get stroke like a painter ♪ 1997 01:46:25,467 --> 01:46:27,433 ♪ It's funny how the mean girl Open all the doors ♪ 1998 01:46:27,567 --> 01:46:29,567 ♪ I've been told y'all I'm the black Regina George ♪ 1999 01:46:29,700 --> 01:46:31,299 ♪ Bikini top, booty shorts Megan core ♪ 2000 01:46:31,433 --> 01:46:33,133 ♪ You was hating back then Now you finna hate more ♪ 2001 01:46:33,267 --> 01:46:35,101 ♪ I got influence They do anything I endorse ♪ 2002 01:46:35,233 --> 01:46:37,534 ♪ I run s... To be a bad bitch is a sport ♪ 2003 01:46:37,667 --> 01:46:40,067 ♪ I woke up hotter Than I was yesterday ♪ 2004 01:46:40,200 --> 01:46:44,332 ♪ Don't care about no rules 'Cause I always get my way ♪ 2005 01:46:44,467 --> 01:46:46,001 ♪ It's not my fault ♪ 2006 01:46:46,133 --> 01:46:48,400 ♪ You came with her But she might leave with me ♪ 2007 01:46:48,534 --> 01:46:51,834 ♪ It's not my fault You've got to pay For what I get for free ♪ 2008 01:46:51,967 --> 01:46:55,700 ♪ It's not my fault You're like, you're like You're like in love with me ♪ 2009 01:46:55,834 --> 01:46:58,734 ♪ It's not my fault You're like in love with me ♪ 2010 01:46:58,867 --> 01:47:00,299 ♪ You're like in love with me ♪ 2011 01:47:02,901 --> 01:47:05,167 ♪ A sexy Quint From sexy Jaws ♪ 2012 01:47:05,299 --> 01:47:06,834 ♪ Catching sexy sharks ♪ 2013 01:47:06,967 --> 01:47:10,167 ♪ Sexy Eleanor Roosevelt Or sexy Joan of Arc ♪ 2014 01:47:10,299 --> 01:47:14,066 ♪ I can be a sexy pirate Or a sexy ballet dancer ♪ 2015 01:47:14,200 --> 01:47:18,867 ♪ I can be a sexy doctor And cure some sexy cancer! ♪ 2016 01:47:30,700 --> 01:47:32,734 ♪ Happy Halloween! ♪ 2017 01:47:36,167 --> 01:47:39,433 ♪ This is Modern feminism talkin' ♪ 2018 01:47:39,567 --> 01:47:43,332 ♪ Watch me as I run the world In shoes I cannot walk in ♪ 2019 01:47:43,467 --> 01:47:46,667 ♪ I can be who I want to be ♪ 2020 01:47:46,801 --> 01:47:50,333 ♪ And sex... sex ♪ 2021 01:47:50,467 --> 01:47:55,200 ♪ Sexy! ♪ 2022 01:47:55,333 --> 01:47:57,700 I'm a sexy mouse. Duh! 2023 01:51:56,866 --> 01:51:57,933 You're next. 2024 01:51:58,066 --> 01:52:00,800 You could be really hot if you change, like, 2025 01:52:00,933 --> 01:52:02,367 everything. 155902