All language subtitles for Southern Charm S08E15 Wreck the Halls 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-NTb_track4_[eng]

Previously
on "Southern Charm"...

[laughter]

[kiss smack]

[screams]

Yes.

While some of us were
having fun in St. Simons--

Let's play a drinking game
about their conversation.

OK.
Every time he says happy.

Crazy or happy.

- Are you crazy?

- Crazy.
- He said crazy.

I'm happy.

Cheers, mother----ers.

Whitney decided
to push the envelope...

Which pissed off Shep...

And made Austen
lose his cool.

OK.

I can't with Shep being like,
"Taylor, listen to me.

I love you."

You've been an
embarrassment too long.

ing moron.

You are the biggest embarrassment

of my----ing life.

You call her 24/7
to control the situation.

I can't believe
I'm sharing oxygen with you!

♪ The kids go loco

But by the next morning,

we were all one big,
happy family... again.

- Bringing home the bacon.
- Ooh.

Anybody that
walked in right now

would think we were just
like, normal people.

Whoa.

And after a day
of shrimping and golf...

God damn it.
I knew I'd do that.

♪ Can't swing this game

----ing asshole.

♪ Don't you know?

We were even planning
our next get-together.

Sewing Down South
had a really good year,

and we're going to throw a,
like, Winter Wonderland party.

That is, until Venita
chose the wrong side.

Might be helpful
if we just acknowledge

his feelings right now.

- Venita, shut up.
- Wow.

Oh, the classy girl
at the table

is telling people
to shut up now.

Got it. Got it. Got it.

I--don't talk to me,
'cause I don't talk

to people who disrespect me.

Leaving me out in the cold.

You're not
welcome to my party.

That just took it
a little too far.

This is why I don't
hang out with you,

because this brings me to
a level that I don't like.

So enjoy your dinner.

♪ It's easy as the birds
and the bees and the 1-2-3 ♪

Mm-hmm.

[jazzy "Jingle Bells"
rendition]

♪

I'm excited.

Christmas time, holiday time.

The tree is now permanently
on for the season.

Guys, also, we're
going to throw, like,

a winter wonderland gala

to celebrate Sewing Down South.

So hopefully,
you're all excited

and you won't get sick
of Christmas music too soon.

[laughter]

What are we looking for?

There's this winter
wonderland-themed party.

We pulled one dress
for Marcie that is--

- I love that look.
---I think so fun.

- Oh, my gosh.
- I haven't felt sexy.

Yeah.

So now I really
want to go like, sexy.

Oh, yeah.

Can I see what
you're going to wear?

There's this one.

Is that going to
have a nipple issue?

You said show up.

Show up, not show out.

[laughter]

Here. Let me see.

See, these are elegant.

Shep, I'm going to wear this,
like, to the golf course.

I'm going to wear this, like,
to Bulls Bay.

You look like Roger Federer.

- I feel like Roger Federer.
- At Wimbledon.

Oh.

Come on. Help. Push.

This here.

Therapist said to stay calm.

I need cold air because
I'm in my 40s and I get hot.

Lucy, you're restless, and
you're giving me anxiety

right now with all your pacing.

[phone ringing]

Hi.

- Hey.
- How are you?

Good.

I'm setting up my new office
on my third floor, so-- -

Anyway.

I just was like, I don't--

I don't have the energy.

Like, I want to be home
with my kid.

But I heard bits and pieces
from Naomie.

Naomie he was like,
really mean.

And she was bawling.

Yet another reason
I didn't want to be there,

'cause Thanksgiving, like,
kind of hurt

my feelings for her.

My crazy ex-girlfriend
wants to come

have a conversation with her.
- Don't say crazy.

Paige isn't--Leva, stop.

When he goes off on Naomie, like,

I'm innately going to be protective.

I don't want to fight
with Craig again,

because obviously
Craig's my friend too.

But I also don't think it's
OK to talk to people that way.

Yeah.

[upbeat music]

♪

[grunts]

♪

Hey.

Wait, this is so cute.

I got your favorite things.

See if you like this one.
- Oh, my god, I love this.

Mm. What's this kind?

That's a cheeseball.

It's a big bite, but--
- Yeah.

[quirky music]

♪

Wow, I've been----ing up
not eating cheese balls.

[laughs]

I feel so Christmasy
right now.

Very cozy.

Wait, I want to show you the
mockups for the event.

This is the layout.

Ooh, I love those trees.

I absolutely love Christmas.

And I have always
dreamt about having

a company big enough
where we can have

a company Christmas party.

Wait, is this, like,
a full sit-down dinner?

- Yeah.
- Question.

Are you doing, like,
a seating chart?

No.

I just--for an event like this
where most everyone

knows each other,
everyone is grown up enough

to pick where they want to sit.
- Right.

But I see it as
controlling the chaos.

You know, like
you're probably not

going to want
Madison to randomly

end up sitting next to Olivia.
- Yeah.

Well, then they need to
not sit next to each other.

I'm really--
I guess, I'm just biased.

Like, I want who
I want around me.

Well, I uninvited Naomie,
as you know, but--

I feel like if you
don't invite her,

it's going to be a bigger
thing, and I just think--

I don't want
to be around her.

I think you not inviting
her is, like, a bit harsh

and makes you look petty,
and you're not.

I want this gala
to be happy

and to be a celebration,
and not me having

to deal with sh-- my past.

I think calling her
and being like,

"Hey, I want to re-invite you,"
is an olive branch.

Like, we can coexist
in the same room.

But we don't need
to be friends.

If she wants to come, fine.

I just don't want to
interact with her anymore.

[upbeat festive music]

♪

[doorbell rings]

- Hey.
- Hi.

How are you?

Thank you for having us.

- Oh, this is going to be fun.
- I know.

Chambongs and caviar.

You've done it before, though.

You told me the other day.
- Yup.

I have one.

I should have just
brought my own.

Who has their own
traveling chambong?

I do.

A friend of mine
gave me chambongs.

And I've never heard
of a chambong.

I figured you and Madison
might be the perfect people

to do it with.

They're like long,
stemmed pipes

that you pour the champagne in.

And you drink it all at once.

But I never get high
on champagne.

I mean, I'm sure I could do
five chambongs

and it wouldn't
have any effect.

[doorbell rings]

That must be Madison.

Merry Christmas.

Hey, darling.

Hey.

Come on in.

Let me set this down
here with the animals.

- How are you?
- You look so cute.

- Where's Whitney?
- Chambongs.

- Here, here, here.
- Yeah.

- Whitney.
- Good evening.

- Hi. Hi.
- You look lovely.

- Did you get a haircut?
- I did.

A little--
- It looks nice.

--a little off the top.

[pop]

- Oh.
- So chambongs.

- Wait a minute.
- Whoa.

- Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.
- It's all right.

It's all right. It's all right.
- All right.

I want to see you all
do it first.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

OK.
All the way?

Mm-hmm.

- Well, that was just a gulp.
- Whoa.

[laughter]

Open the throat.
No--

Jesus Christ.

I can't look.
- [laughs]

Of all the dignities I've
suffered in my lifetime

through my mother,
this reaches the top five.

That was amazing.

Let's do it again.

OK. Wait a minute.

Before we do it,
hand me the caviar.

Get a big one.
A big, flat one.

- Oh, I don't know if I--
- Get a big chip.

Put lots on.

Would anyone like
a normal beverage

as opposed to a chambong?

I would love one.

Stop, Whitney.

I have never seen anyone
do that in my life.

That is unacceptable.

[laughs]

You did that
like it was salsa.

[laughter]

Let's do it again.

Sure, we'll do another one.

That's about the proper pour.

Yeah.
That's a lot more than--

So be careful.

- Oh, God.
- OK.

- Cheers.
- Chambongs.

Chambong. Chambong.

Whoa.
[laughter]

It's right.

Piece of cake.

Oh, great. Thank you.

All right, y'all. Have fun.

[laughter]

[phone ringing]

Craig Conover is calling me.

Hello?

Hey, what's up?

Nothing.

[tense music]

Yeah. I don't know.

I feel like this is sort of a
conversation we've had before.

And then you do it again.

So I just feel like
I don't want to put myself

in that situation anymore.

OK.
Well, thank you for calling.

Thank you.

All right.

Bye.

Oh, hey.

Slithering down.

Go ahead.

Exactly.

Don't mind me.

[laughter]

So what are you thinking
you're going to do?

I don't know.

I still am not 100%
that I should go.

- I would go.
- Really?

Yeah. Your friends are there.

Um...

[laughs]

What are you about
to say right now?

Oh.

I think the champagne finally--

finally hit.

This has been litty titty.

You know what that means?

No, I have no idea.

Tell her.

We're about as lit as
that tree over there.

I prefer sh--faced.

That works too.

Coming up...

I love us together,
and it's like a dream.

I want to--

Yeah?

[sighs]

[upbeat music]

♪

Oh.

I'm excited.

I'm so excited.

This is my first winter gala.

Wow.

It looks so good.

[bright festive music]

♪

This looks like
a full wedding.

- Hi.
- Yeah.

This looks amazing.

We're not ready for you.

No, Amanda, you're
so good at this.

- Do you love it?
- It looks so good.

- Do you like it?
- Yeah, I love it.

- Thank you for doing all this.
- Yeah.

So this will be the photo
area with the balloons.

You can like, pose.
- Very cute.

So we're thinking we'll put,
like, some of the pillows here.

And then like we
thought you could take

pictures like this and stuff.
- Absolutely.

So bar there. Bar here.

Two bars?
That's perfect.

- Yeah, that's great.
- OK, good.

Oh, my God.
These are so cute.

Looks like a tux.
- Oh, did you see--

- Oh.
- See?

Yeah, the table.
Like, the theme is beautiful.

So you do need to decide
on seating chart.

Like, where you want everybody.

We're not doing one.

Oh.

I think in an event where
people didn't know everyone

and it wasn't friends,
then sure.

But like, who am I to tell
people where to sit?

OK.

I mean, as long as you
don't think it would create

drama by not having one.

- By having it, it will.
- OK. OK.

Whatever keeps this like calm,
and peaceful, and lovely.

With this group, who knows?

Oh.

All right.
- This looks so good.

You did an amazing job.
- Anything else?

I know you guys have to go
and like get ready and stuff.

- It really looks so good.
- OK.

I'm going to go
get back to work.

All right. Thank you.

[lively music]

♪

Hello.

- Hey, Tay-Tay.
- Hi.

Hi, buddy.

Hi, crazy boy.
Come on.

- Hey.
- Wait, here.

Will you hold that?
- Yeah.

I know you had some
anxiety about your dress.

Has that subsided?

It's fine.
I bought these little--

I think they're called
chicken cutlets. [laughs]

That's going to hopefully
help with my situation.

- Well, it's a beautiful dress.
- They're boob pads.

[both laugh]

What do they do?

I think it's supposed to
maybe help fill out that area.

Fill out the
dress a little bit?

Itty bitty titty committee.

And this is--

Oh, there it is.

- Oh, let's take this off.
- That's a pretty color.

Yeah.

Wow, babe.

That's really sharp.

That's going to look
really, really good.

OK.
Let's sit outside.

It's a beautiful day.
- OK.

It is a beautiful day.

Oh, man. Look at little Tim.

We forgot about him.

And he's still thriving...

sort of.

So I want to talk
to you about how

I'm just happy
that we're happy.

Like, I'm genuinely happy,
and I think you are too.

And yeah, I mean,

there's some things
that I need to work on,

and we've talked about it.

But I want you to be there
with me to do it.

I will.

And I will be here to help
in any way possible.

I know.
I know you will.

And then you--
- To love and encourage you.

I know.

And your love and encouragement
means the world to me.

It really does.

And I just feel really positive
about you being in my life

because it's important.

[tender music]

♪

And neither of us know,
you know,

how anything is going
to work out, ever.

But I like not knowing
what the future holds,

like, day to day.

But I like being
with you, knowing,

not knowing, you know?

[chuckles]

So everything that's happened
has gotten us right here.

And it's like a dream.

And you're the star
of my little dream.

[chuckles]

I want to go places
and have adventures,

and what better way
to do it than with you?

This is going to sound crazy,

but I've just been thinking
about it.

♪

Um...

Yeah?

[sighs]

I love us together.

I really do.

So I want you to quit your job.

We take $30,000, my money,

and we do a joint account,
me and you,

and we travel the world.

We go until we run out,
and then we come home.

Listen, traveling
is the ultimate barometer

of a relationship.

Bill Murray, he made a speech
here in Charleston,

and he said, you know,
if you love somebody,

travel to places that are hard
to get to,

hard to get back.

And if you still love
each other when you get back

to the airport,
ask her to marry you.

And it's like an investment
in our future, honestly.

- Oh, my.
- Think about it.

That's a lot.

- Think about it.
- I'm taking it in right now.

It'd be the best
money I ever spent.

Are you kidding me?

- I know. I just--
- Like, how fun.

I don't want to, you know.

I don't want to look like
I'm traveling on your dime.

That's like--
- I know you don't.

That gives me, like--

because I like
being independent.

I know it's a leap of faith.

I know you're into faith.

And it's scary. I get it.

Our relationship
is a leap of faith.

But I think we could benefit
from an adventure.

I would think
it's every girl's dream.

But if he is wanting
me to uproot my life

and put all my
eggs in one basket,

that gives me nothing
to lean on except for him.

I don't know how to feel.

I'm serious about it.

Well, like I said, there
is a lot to unpack here.

But, um--

I really think you
should think about it.

Yeah.

[soft dramatic music]

♪

Coming up...

[laughs]

Because you ain't
coming home tonight.

[lively music]

♪

Charles, darling, do you
want to get ready with me?

Come on.
[dog barks]

[dog grumbles]

[hair dryer whirring]

♪

Wow.

These make my dick look huge.

[laughs]

♪

Get ready.

I've got to cover my pimple.

- Where?
- It's annoying.

Right here.

Taylor, you're the only one
that sees these things.

What look am I
going to go for?

Take the cake.

I like the name of that one.

Hey, Craig, ready?

Yeah.

Oh, wow.
- You like the bow?

Yeah.

But, like, a hot Cindy Lou Who.

Yay.

[jazz music]

♪

- You look so pretty.
- Thanks, baby.

- Ah.
- [laughs]

Damn it, my hair
looked perfect.

Get me away from these trees.

["We Wish You
a Merry Christmas"]

♪

Oh, this looks so pretty.

Yeah, it does.

You did all of this.

So, like, you should be
really proud of yourself.

Yeah. You did it all.

My mind's processing
a lot right now.

And there's a lot of--
it's kind of like that scene

in the end of the movie
where your life

flashes between your eyes.

And you know, hopefully,
I'm not dying.

But I have all these images

going through my mind
right now.

[dramatic music]

I can't take you seriously

when you run your sewing machine.

Yeah.

It just has to be original.

It should be drawn
better so that it

doesn't look like clip art.

♪

This is a perfect
European sham for this couch.

Please stop laughing at me.

You sit home and you sew.

Craig, what the
[BLEEP] is this?

And you pretend to do things.

What's wrong with my sewing?

♪

- Hey, guys.
- Hey, guys.

A lot of people that doubted
Sewing Down South

are going to be
in this room tonight.

Dude, cheers.
Who would have thought?

Congratulations
to Sewing Down South.

To a successful year
and many more, buddy.

A successful three years.

And sure, it's a little
bit fun to be, like, ha ha.

Who didn't believe in me again?

Look at this.

- Are you excited?
- Yeah, I'm very excited.

Why, because you
get to dress up?

I love dressing up.

Oops.

OK.
I'm letting my dress down.

That would have
been a good entrance.

Wow, thank you.

- What's up?
- How are you?

You look fantastic.
- Hi.

Thank you. Hi.

- That's you.
- Yeah, that's the best.

You look great.
- You look beautiful, girl.

So do you.

This is good too though, right?

Oh, I'm happy.
It matches the venue.

- Hi.
- Hello.

Of course.
Thank you so much.

Thank you. Thank you.

Look at Craigie
looking sharp.

Oh, here's Venita. Hi.

Hi.

You look so nice.

Hi. Hi. How are you?

You look very dapper.

I was just about to say
you're looking lovely.

You look good. Thank you.

- Hi. Hello.
- Oh, wow.

Marcie had a child
seven days ago, somehow.

- Yeah.
- Well, two weeks ago.

- Yeah, but--
- No you didn't.

Really?
- That's absolutely insane.

- How are you?
- I'm good.

How are you?
- Good.

This is my partner, Jerry.
- Hey.

So congratulations
on everything.

[phone ringing]

Hello?

- Hi.
- Hi.

I am almost to your place,
pulling around the corner.

Well, your chariot awaits.

[gasps] Hi.

- Hello.
- [giggles]

You look nice.
- What?

Oh, my God.
I don't even want to hug you.

I'm going to get, like,
everything on you.

Mm. You look so nice.

- So do you.
- Mwah.

I like Olivia a lot.

And I think that
we could be something.

I see you went with the blue.

- Why?
- What do you mean, why?

Look how low this baby goes.

I don't have the right
equipment for that.

[laughs]

Because tell Robin that you
ain't coming home tonight.

["Jingle Bells"]

♪

Hello, Tina.

I'm OK for right now.

- Well, hello, Cinderelly.
- Hello.

Cinderelly, Cinderelly.

You look so good.

Oh, I literally was like--

- Oh, [BLEEP].
- I told you.

Oh, it's fine. Who cares?

- What's up?
- Oh, what's up?

How's the baby?
How's Edie?

Good. She's really good.

I'm like, so in love.

She's actually
like, a sweet baby.

And everybody's like,
well, just wait.

She's going to probably
start crying a lot.

I'm like, well, so far,
cross our fingers.

- Hello.
- Hey, guys.

You look great, man.
Thanks for coming.

So do you. Congratulations.

Hey, Ms. Pat.

Craigie. Craigie.

Thank you for coming.

Oh, it's fun.

[jazz music]

♪

OK, do you want
to do the hand-hold

or the, like,
walking down the altar?

Hand hold. My goodness.

♪

Hello, everybody.

What's up, buddy?

Thanks for having me, dude.

- Yeah, anytime.
- Congrats, guys.

Hi.

Oh, my god.

You beautiful lady.

[upbeat music]

♪

Are these as a result of--

- Yes.
- I love that.

- These are milk.
- Really?

But yes.

But the thing is, I was--

I'm looking up here.

I promise.

I heard y'all got drunk
together last night.

She got me drunk.

We did chambongs.

- I was sh--faced.
- Yeah.

Welcome to our world.
- I'll tell you--

[laughter]

Three----ing years ago,
man, like, you know,

would you be thinking this?

- I don't know.
- Yeah.

It's like I'm taking
it all in.

Hey, dude.

If there's ever an
eating crow moment

without even having to say it.

Don't leave my side.

I'm walking into enemy
territory, Madison.

Craig hates me.

Hey, man.

It's your ex-girlfriend.

Oh, OK.

It's fine.
- Hi.

Hi. Hi.

I mean, I said, we have
to take pictures.

- How are you?
- [inaudible]

But hey.

I have to laugh to myself
because Naomie thought

leaving the law to sew

was the biggest clown idea
in the world.

And here she is walking into
my company's Christmas party.

I'm going to say hi to Naomie.

Hey, guys.

Thanks for coming, Naomie.
- Hi.

Thank you for having me.
- Of course. Of course.

Sorry for disinviting.

No one's on the blacklist.
- I know.

But cheers, guys.
Thank you for coming.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

- Thank you for having us.
- Yeah, of course. Good.

This feels really awkward.

But I came because it's just
something about the principle

of not allowing him to force
me out of a friend group

that we are both in.

[tense music]

Coming up...

When I was, like, in a very
uncomfortable position,

what did you do? Nothing.

You're going to walk
away because you don't want

to hear what I have to say,
but as my friend--

Right now,
we are not friends.

["Joy to the World"]

♪

- Thanks for coming.
- Yeah.

[interposing voices]
- Beautiful.

Thanks. Hey, what's up man?

How are you?
- Good to see you.

You too. Hi.

My God, you had a baby?

How are you?

Two weeks ago.

Get out.
Oh, my God.

- Thank you.
- You look absolutely gorgeous.

Thank you.

If I may interrupt
the [inaudible],

you look beautiful tonight.
- This is really cool.

I got to say.

I really want to get
a picture with you

over there in that winter
wonderland at some point.

I feel like a suburban mom.

They might be
over there a while.

Ladies, y'all are cute.

Yeah.

Ahh.

OK.

Can I please ask you
for a double tequila soda

splashed with orange please?

- Hey.
- Hi. How are you?

- Well.
- Maybe later.

Hi. Happy you came.

Yeah.

It was real dodgy
there for a second.

That's OK.
I'm happy you're here.

Half OJ, half soda, please.

Yeah, so things are good-ish?

Good enough?

Oh, no.

I'm going to interrupt. Sorry.

How are we?

We're good.

- All right.
- Yeah.

Um... OK.

Hi.

[inaudible]

Oh.

[tense music]

Naomie's kind of avoiding me.

I just walked up
to her two times.

Yeah. 100%.

Well...

[upbeat music]

Oh. Is this a raw bar, bitch?

I want one of these.

Did you help with
this party planning?

Not really.

Oh.
[both laugh]

Taylor, you look lovely.

[inaudible]

You having smoky eye thing
going on.

Yeah.
We both have a smoky eye.

- It's very winter wonderland.
- It is.

It's very--
- Ah.

[upbeat music]
- ♪ Ba-ba-doo

♪ Ba-ba dee

♪

Oh, there's Kathryn.

Oh, goodness.
- Let's get a drink.

Hold on.
Let's get refills.

I'm not ready for that.

I just--

look at this ice queen.

Hi. How are you?

- Is this a cloak?
- You look gorgeous.

- Thank you.
- Thank you so much.

- Hi.
- Good to see you.

You are a literally
the ice queen.

I love it. [laughs]

- Wait, did y'all meet?
- Hi.

- I'm so sorry.
- This is Jake.

Olivia.
- I'm Jake.

- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

Oh.

- Hi. How are you?
- I'm good.

Thank you for coming.
- How's it going?

Thanks for having me.
- Yeah, of course.

[inaudible]

- I take years off her life.
- Yeah.

Well, my ideas are,
like, impulsive.

And I know that they're
gonna work.

Ideas are the easy part.

You know that, right?

- Yeah.
- Oh, I know.

That's why I have my--

I was like, OK.

That's why I have my team.

She's good people.

Even when I'm mad at you,
I can't be because I love her.

Whatever. Venita likes me.

- Yeah.
- [laughs]

[upbeat music]

Oh, my God, you got a
little Christmas picture.

I know.

They literally are like
all so dependent on you.

Cheers, guys.
Thanks for coming.

Cheers.

To your success.

This is the best I've
ever seen you dressed.

Thank you.

I mean, not only that,
he put like--

he put an effort in.
- The clothes fit.

I went to a rental
tuxedo company.

Yeah, but it looks good.

- Is it a rental?
- Yeah.

By the way, Taylor got
me these cufflinks.

See, they're sharks' teeth.
- Yeah, those are sick.

- That's pretty cool.
- Oh, that's cool.

Shep told me y'all are
going to go travel around.

Like, OK.

You know, he just like
laid this one on me.

- Yeah.
- I'm like, whoa.

As much as I would love to
like, up and leave my job,

I've got like, a house here,
like a mortgage I have to pay.

And--

You can rent it out.

Yeah, I could, yeah.

So I've got a--yeah.

- There's a lot of--
- The gears are turning though.

I had a conversation
with Taylor today,

a really good one.
And I was like, look.

I want to show you
around the world.

When the money runs
out, we fly home.

Wait, wait, wait.
Hold on.

Like, where's that taking that?
- I don't know.

We fly to London.

Then we hit Paris, Greece.

Yeah, but his point is like,
so what then?

When the money's gone,
she doesn't have a job anymore.

Because if she quits her job,
there's no independence.

Now she's dependent on you.

It sounds like
a small step to me.

I think it's a great step.

Anyways, I'm still pissed
at you that you look this good

and you're two weeks out
of having a baby.

You look amazing too.
Oh, my God.

[tense music]

Can I take a second?

OK.

You are someone
that I care about.

So like, cut the sh--.

If you think I'm being
someone's pet,

be like, listen, V--

Let's just talk
about it another time.

Like--
- But will we actually, though?

'Cause, like,
this something that--

Probably not because--
probably not.

We've known each other
a long time.

But I realize like there's just
not a deep friendship there.

But are you trying for the--

Based on like, your actions.

Are you trying for
the deep friendship or no?

When I was, like, in a very
uncomfortable position--

- But that wasn't my--
- What did you do?

Nothing.
You don't care about me.

You only care about yourself.

I don't need that.

- That's just how I feel.
- But I don't need that.

- You do need that.
- No, I don't.

So that's--

Venita, I'm being honest
with you.

Don't shut me down.

Come to me as a friend
and be like, wait, hold on.

Enough. Enough.

And you're going to walk
away because you don't want

to hear what I have to say.

But as my friend--

Right now we are not friends.

My feelings are still hurt.

I mean, you showed your
true colors in a moment

where you know I'm being
attacked at a dinner table.

And I'm not really friends
with people that I don't trust.

So, yeah, this is kind of
a friendship-defining thing.

♪

Babe. No.

Babe, what is going on?
What is going on?

- I'm not going to make it.
- What do you mean?

What do you mean?

What did she just say to you?

When it comes to Naomie,
we have history.

♪

Yeah. No.

That's not going to be
an easy one to get over.

♪

Coming up...

I don't have
a seat at dinner.

They're throwing
a hissy fit over there.

But it's fine.

They can sit by themselves.

[sighs]

This is like
the dinner from hell.

[festive music]

Rock it hip to hip.

- Wait.
- Taylor.

- Wait, my sticky boob.
- Wait.

You have a boyfriend?
What the heck?

No, that's my friend, Jake.

Oh, OK. I was like, wait.
Curly hair.

Oh. OK. Perfect.

- BFF.
- Those are the best.

I can't kiss the bartender.

I have a boyfriend.

Aw.

Oh, we gotta go.

We're just here
for the cocktails.

- You guys have a dinner?
- Apparently, we have a dinner.

Oh, you have to leave?
- Yeah.

I'm going to drop my mom off.

I'm going to come back.

See you guys.

- Where should we sit?
- [inaudible]

Well, you and I are
going to be, like, here.

Oh, look.
They claimed with purses.

I know. I saw that.

Maybe we should have
done the seating chart.

Oh, OK.

[quirky music]

♪

Is there assigned seating?

If you want to sit
across from John--

No, it's OK.

I would sit next
to Taylor then.

Sit next to Taylor.
- OK.

Is there place settings?
No?

- No.
- Boys are on this side.

Girls are sitting across
from their dates on this side.

Why don't you sit
right there, Taylor?

- Wait.
- And then am I--

No, that's fine.

And, Shep, you're
sitting next to me.

Am I on the other
side of Paige?

Where do they want us to sit?

I don't know.

Craig is logistically
not the best.

Craig, think about Austen.
- OK.

We'll slide one.
We'll slide one.

Madison, would you
go here please?

OK.

Erica, will you
go there, please?

Would you come
right here, please?

Thank you.
- And then Austen--

and then--
- Yeah, and then Austen--

- Olivia and Austen.
- Will be right here.

Craig.

Are there seats?

Not in this table.

So you guys have to sit
at the other table.

[tense music]

OK.

This is so annoying.

Well, you didn't
have to come.

Yeah.

Thank you for making
me feel so awkward.

OK.

I can only do so much.

It's one thing for there
not to be a seating chart.

I get it.

But there has to be room
for everybody

to sit at the table.

And so this just feels
like tit for tat,

like, I'll invite
you to my party,

but you can't sit with us.

It just feels fishy.

Well, in the meantime,
what you have missed

is that I don't have
a seat at dinner.

Like, I literally
can't anymore.

I would never have an event
and invite people one by one

and then not have
enough seats for them.

And so this is
looking like you're

deliberately making your
ex-girlfriend feel stupid.

I'm going to go sit
beside Madison right there.

- Yeah.
- Madison.

You OK?

I would like to sit
with Amanda, honestly,

and Jerry. That'd be good.

It's so demeaning.

I don't even know why I'm
friends with some people.

Like why am I even--

So----ing toxic.

[tense music]

They're throwing
a hissy fit over there.

Should have done
place settings, bro.

No, we shouldn't, because
we're all----ing adults.

It's on the people that can't--
- [laughs]

This is my party.

And it is.

It's not my party
and I'll cry if I want to.

It's my party and I'm going
to have fun if I want to.

And you two...

are trying to keep me
from having fun.

If I made a seating chart
and put them over there,

that would have been
a dickhead move.

But it's fine.

They can sit by themselves.

♪

Sh-- happens.

This is a really
uncomfortable situation.

I am ready.

I am ready for food.

That looks really good.

I'm probably going
to eat all of it.

Oh, this looks nice.

It does. It looks so dainty.

Love you.

What the [BLEEP]?

I don't think Leva
got the dress code memo.

Winter wonderland,
not slutty ho.

Babe, what's wrong?

I just don't like that.

I know.

The mean girl energy.

I'm like,
uncomfortable with it.

Hey, guys.

We want to eat,
so Taylor is going to say--

or maybe should I try?

You say the prayer,
and then I'll

give a speech in a second.

- OK.
- Say the blessing.

- I'll say the blessing. OK?
- OK.

I'm going to do
the best I can

because I'm really out of--

Bro, this is a step.

I want to hear the blessing.
- This is a big step.

Everybody hold hands.

Is that a thing? Yes.

Olivia. Hold hands.

Shep, are you
saying the grace?

I'm trying.

Oh, he's trying.
You got it.

- I'm almost all out of grace.
- You got it.

[laughter]
- [inaudible]

Shush. All right.

God, um--

Oh, God. Are you listening?

God, thank you
for all our friends here.

And thank you
for this beautiful setting

and these wonderful,
wonderful drinks and food.

And may they make us happy,
and get us to the new year,

and have a greater
new year after that.

Here, here.
Thank you.

Amen.

- Whoo!
- Come about.

Amen.
- I didn't know the words.

May we pray.

God, um, long time no see.

[laughter]

This is, like,
the dinner from hell.

[plucky music]

The lamb is actually
really good.

The scallops are
a blessing to all of us.

- It's really good.
- It is amazing.

All right, guys,
I'd love for you to dig in,

but I did want to say
a few words.

To the people of my past,
present and the people

that are going
to be in my future...

I wanted to thank
Jerry and Amanda

for coming into my life.

That's the reason
that my vision

has turned into a brand.

And I remember Shep just being
like, you're a----ing idiot.

But you stuck with me
to push me through.

And without that,
maybe I wouldn't be here.

You're welcome. [laughs]

[laughter]

So thanks for being here.

And I love sharing
this with everyone.

So cheers, guys.
- Here, here.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

- Cheers. Yeah.
- Whoo.

Thanks for being here.
Where the hell is my name?

Harumph, harumph, harumph.

Where was my name
in that speech?

Didn't even thank the wife.

God, almighty.

- Was that OK?
- You did great.

I'm going to get a drink.
What are you doing?

I want to go sit down
with Amanda and Jerry.

- Do you want one?
- Um, probably not.

- I'll bring you one.
- Just water.

- Just water?
- Yeah.

No.
I have a water right here.

- Cheers.
- Salut.

Cheers, Austen.

Merry Christmas. Cheers.

Yeah.

Whitney.

Sorry.
Been dealing with stuff.

Help me.
What do I do?

I feel--I mean, we're, like,
awkwardly sitting at the end.

And I'm like, OK.
We probably should leave.

OK, well...

[clears throat]

Guess what the dessert is?

- What?

- Crème brulée.
- Ahh.

No. That's not.
That's a flan.

Yes, it is, babe.
It is a crème brulée.

That's a flan.

I feel like
it's a banana one.

A banana fosters flan.

It's more of like
an egg custard.

Hey.

Can we talk to you and Jerry?

How are you?
- Really?

- Yeah.
- No, but for real.

Craig is out of line.

Oh, my God.

Craig, Leva is sitting
with your team.

[tense music]

- What is happening?
- What is going on?

I don't function that way.

And that's why I'm upset.

Her going and sitting
there is crazy.

Here, wait.

You sit here.
- No, I mean--

Sit.
No, you're squatting.

Oh, yeah, don't do that.

Amanda, you don't
have to talk to her.

She's acting like a child.

Leva, you can actually
leave if you want.

You're acting like
a child, and you're

making this all about you.

And this is actually about me,
and my business, and my team.

But it's starting
to get to the point

that you should probably
leave because you

made it all about you.

♪

Oh, my God.

Craig.

Leva is sitting with your team.

Craig is out of line.

Amanda, you don't
have to talk to her.

She's acting like a child.

Leva, you can actually
leave if you want.

You're acting like a child,

and you're making this
all about you.

And this is actually about me
and my business and my team.

But it's starting
to get to the point

that you should probably
leave because you

made it all about you.
- Did I, Craig?

Yeah. You threw
a bunch of hissy fits.

'Cause you're so rude.

Look, either leave or--

Somebody didn't teach
you how to speak to people.

If you're not happy here,
then leave.

Bro, you're not Elon Musk.

Let's keep it----ing real.

A person who has blood,
sweat, and tears

tied up in a business
isn't screaming

at their business gala.

You are looking
like an asshole.

- Oh, no.
- Good for you.

Oh, Leva.

Went 0 to 100.

I think other people
at this table

know what my 100 looks like.

Everybody at this table
has seen you go 0 to 100.

Leva, then I'm going
to kindly ask you to leave.

I'm so tired of this.

I was literally
talking to three people.

Leva, just go.

Why are you at a party
that you're not invited--

- I'm leaving.
- Like, go. Leva, just go.

I also have a business
on the same street

as these people, the people
who actually run your business.

Not you, you clown.

Oh, my God.

That was so rude.
- Crazy.

Crazy.
- That was extremely rude.

Ooh, this is good.

I'll have security escort
you out, or you can go.

It's time. It's time.
- I'm leaving.

Go.

I'm sorry that you
got to this point.

- Really?
- Go.

Just go home.
Go home.

- What are you doing?
- Go home.

You want me to run?

- Go home.
- You're a loser.

Jesus Christ.

What an embarrassing
way to go out.

That was----ing rude.

[BLEEP] her.

[BLEEP] you, Craig.
Such a joke.

And you know what?
And that's Christmas.

You know what?
That's, that's, uh--

Hey. We're not only
cold-hearted bitches here.

That was awesome.
[BLEEP] yeah.

Love that. I love it.
Time to go.

It really--
it had been time to go.

You're such a bitch.

Whoa. OK.

Good talking to you.

You too.

[dramatic music]

♪

- Leva, do you need someone?
- No, I'm done.

I'm done.
- Leva, Leva, Leva.

Stay. Just stay.
- No.

I'm done.

I mean, I understand
what she's saying.

We can't like--

No, I'm not going
to force her to stay

if she really doesn't want to.

I mean, I understand
that feeling.

♪

[upbeat music]

♪

- Hey.
- Hey, you.

[deep voice] ♪ Silent night

♪ Ho--

Hol...
- Um.

I love this band.

Whoo. Party.

I just don't understand why--
why can't we all get along?

Maybe this is the end.

I mean, I'm telling Taylor, like,

let's get the [BLEEP]
out of the country.

Hey, guys.

♪ We've got two tickets
to paradise ♪

We have been planning this
trip for a few months now.

[upbeat music]

♪

[dramatic music]

♪

Next time on
the "Southern Charm Reunion."

Craig, you just ripped
your pants?

A little bit.

Why don't you wear underwear?
[laughter]

I don't think anyone
is surprised

to learn Austen is boring
in bed.

Something stuck me around
for three years.

Ahh.
[laughter]

How many times did you have
to sneak out of Pat's house?

[laughter]
- I remember.

Why do you wanna see
Craig's dick?

Andy, will you help us
explore our love?

Yes. I would love
to facilitate that.

Everyone in this group
has shared one lover.

I think Thomas and Olivia, right?

Sorry, did you just pull that
out of your fake ass or what?

No, my ass is actually real.

[dramatic music]

You just don't hook up with
people's exes.

Maybe you're still in love
with her.

♪

[BLEEP] you, Leva.

And [BLEEP] you, Venita,
because then

I saw what you said,
which is a bold----ing lie.

How did I talk sh--
about you?

Oh, my God.

Venita, are you watching
the same show?

You said sh-- about me,
point blank.

Like what? I mean,
I don't talk about you.

- She doesn't do anything to--
- Stop. You literally--

Because of what you did
to her--

Let me voice what I feel.

You----ed another person
in Texas, Shep.

Like, it's been two months
since we've broken up.

- He is single now.
- I don't care.

He's----ed allegedly
over 300 whores.

Like, I was the whore that
stuck around for long enough.

I'm sorry you feel that way.

Why do you care
if it's over?

Because I----ing love him.