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1
00:00:00,812 --> 00:00:03,604
[Crow caws]
2
00:00:03,605 --> 00:00:05,840
Frankie: Out here in the middle,
we run on hope.
3
00:00:05,841 --> 00:00:07,674
We hope for a mild winter.
4
00:00:07,675 --> 00:00:09,711
We hope George Clooney will
stop making serious movies
5
00:00:09,711 --> 00:00:11,745
and do a nice romantic comedy.
6
00:00:11,746 --> 00:00:13,947
And sometimes we do
something so crazy,
7
00:00:13,948 --> 00:00:16,117
it can only have
been fueled by hope.
8
00:00:16,870 --> 00:00:19,538
I bought name-brand peas.
9
00:00:19,539 --> 00:00:22,409
I know it's a splurge, Mike,
but they're not regular peas.
10
00:00:22,410 --> 00:00:25,144
- They're hope peas.
- Hope peas?
11
00:00:25,145 --> 00:00:28,015
Yep, it's a sign of my
faith in our future.
12
00:00:28,016 --> 00:00:30,949
Ever since you and Rusty went
into this diaper thing together,
13
00:00:30,950 --> 00:00:33,719
I just feel like things could
be turning around for us.
14
00:00:33,719 --> 00:00:34,719
Who knows?
15
00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:38,624
If things go well, we could be the King
and Queen of novelty baby products.
16
00:00:38,625 --> 00:00:40,928
Well, let's not get ahead
of ourselves, Your Majesty.
17
00:00:40,929 --> 00:00:42,127
[Sighs] Wait.
18
00:00:42,128 --> 00:00:43,995
Don't tell me things
are not going well,
19
00:00:43,996 --> 00:00:46,665
'cause I also got takeout,
and I super-sized the fries.
20
00:00:46,666 --> 00:00:48,466
I'm spending like
a drunken sailor.
21
00:00:48,467 --> 00:00:50,468
Well, it's going fine.
22
00:00:50,469 --> 00:00:51,970
The store called
Rusty this morning,
23
00:00:51,971 --> 00:00:53,571
and, uh, the things are selling.
24
00:00:53,572 --> 00:00:55,540
They think they might
make a second order.
25
00:00:55,541 --> 00:00:56,942
[Sighs] Okay, this is weird.
26
00:00:56,943 --> 00:00:58,710
Everything you're
saying sounds good,
27
00:00:58,711 --> 00:01:00,545
but your face doesn't
match your words.
28
00:01:00,546 --> 00:01:02,681
How's this?
29
00:01:02,682 --> 00:01:04,549
Eh, go back to the old face.
30
00:01:04,550 --> 00:01:05,951
[Computer chimes]
31
00:01:05,952 --> 00:01:08,486
Hello, parentals.
What's the haps?
32
00:01:08,487 --> 00:01:09,955
Hi, honey. Nothing much.
We were just...
33
00:01:09,956 --> 00:01:11,624
Yeah, sorry,
I only have a minute,
34
00:01:11,624 --> 00:01:14,092
and I actually just
called to talk to Brick.
35
00:01:14,093 --> 00:01:15,961
Are those name-brand peas?
36
00:01:15,962 --> 00:01:18,864
Brick,
your sister's on the thing.
37
00:01:21,434 --> 00:01:23,101
Okay, yes,
I did borrow that book
38
00:01:23,102 --> 00:01:25,136
that Mom gave you
when you turned 13,
39
00:01:25,137 --> 00:01:27,505
but I just had a few questions
that needed clarifying.
40
00:01:27,506 --> 00:01:30,108
- You what?
- Nothing! How's college?
41
00:01:30,109 --> 00:01:32,944
Well, how would you like
to find out for yourself?
42
00:01:32,945 --> 00:01:35,714
Because you are getting
an all-expense-paid trip
43
00:01:35,715 --> 00:01:37,382
to East Indiana State!
44
00:01:37,383 --> 00:01:39,117
Ahh! It's not actually
all-expense-paid.
45
00:01:39,118 --> 00:01:41,053
I'm gonna need money
for his food, Mom.
46
00:01:42,888 --> 00:01:44,489
Hmm.
47
00:01:44,490 --> 00:01:45,991
Well, Cindy's parents
are making her try out
48
00:01:45,992 --> 00:01:48,526
for volleyball this weekend,
so I'm free.
49
00:01:48,527 --> 00:01:51,730
Yay! We can go out for pizza.
50
00:01:51,731 --> 00:01:54,466
You can see where my classes are,
meet my R.A..
51
00:01:54,467 --> 00:01:57,669
But just so you know, Brick, there are
all types of people here at college,
52
00:01:57,670 --> 00:01:59,571
so you might hear some
music with explicit lyrics.
53
00:01:59,572 --> 00:02:00,805
Uh, hello?
54
00:02:00,806 --> 00:02:02,807
I didn't hear the word
"library" in there.
55
00:02:02,808 --> 00:02:06,144
Yeah, that's because I was
saving the best for last.
56
00:02:06,145 --> 00:02:10,145
They have a library here,
Brick, with 52,000 books.
57
00:02:10,549 --> 00:02:12,384
You can request a book,
58
00:02:12,385 --> 00:02:14,753
and they will actually send
it down to you in an elevator.
59
00:02:14,754 --> 00:02:15,920
It's a book elevator!
60
00:02:15,921 --> 00:02:17,722
A book elevator?
61
00:02:17,723 --> 00:02:21,092
Hold on. I need a minute.
I'm a little dizzy.
62
00:02:21,093 --> 00:02:22,460
[Door opens]
63
00:02:22,461 --> 00:02:25,764
- Hey. What you doing?
- Nothing.
64
00:02:25,765 --> 00:02:28,133
Why don't you turn something on?
It's weird.
65
00:02:28,134 --> 00:02:30,368
Are you okay?
66
00:02:30,369 --> 00:02:32,904
You seem like you're in
kind of a strange mood.
67
00:02:32,905 --> 00:02:35,840
It'll pass.
68
00:02:35,841 --> 00:02:38,811
69
00:02:43,783 --> 00:02:45,083
[Chuckles]
70
00:02:45,084 --> 00:02:46,684
Uh, Brick,
I don't think you're gonna need
71
00:02:46,685 --> 00:02:49,020
your branch of real cotton
on your weekend with Sue.
72
00:02:49,021 --> 00:02:51,089
Eh, I've still got a
few days to decide.
73
00:02:51,090 --> 00:02:52,690
I'll put it in the "maybe" pile.
74
00:02:52,691 --> 00:02:55,527
Hey, let me ask you something.
75
00:02:55,528 --> 00:02:59,528
Does your Dad seem to be
acting a little... Odd lately?
76
00:03:00,566 --> 00:03:01,800
[Rattling]
77
00:03:01,801 --> 00:03:04,836
Never mind.
I'm asking the wrong guy.
78
00:03:04,837 --> 00:03:07,939
Okay, so, you're gonna want to
hang tight to your Brick-tinerary.
79
00:03:07,940 --> 00:03:11,076
If we want to see everything, we are
gonna have to stick to schedule.
80
00:03:11,077 --> 00:03:13,578
As long as I get to see the
book elevator, I'm good.
81
00:03:13,579 --> 00:03:15,680
Now, what kind of line are
we looking at for that?
82
00:03:15,681 --> 00:03:18,483
- An hour? Two?
- Uh, I think we'll be fine.
83
00:03:18,484 --> 00:03:20,685
I have also got a loose
verbal commitment from Axl
84
00:03:20,686 --> 00:03:22,353
- to meet us for pizza later.
- Mm!
85
00:03:22,354 --> 00:03:23,855
But we're keeping it flex.
86
00:03:23,856 --> 00:03:25,590
See, Brick, that's the kind of
thing people say at college.
87
00:03:25,591 --> 00:03:27,025
Holy crap! Is that Logan?
88
00:03:27,026 --> 00:03:28,059
[Gasps]
89
00:03:28,060 --> 00:03:29,094
Who's Logan?
90
00:03:29,095 --> 00:03:30,595
Logan!
91
00:03:30,596 --> 00:03:32,497
The Abercrombie guy
who asked me to prom,
92
00:03:32,498 --> 00:03:34,666
and then we had that magical night
after I got sprayed with cheese.
93
00:03:34,667 --> 00:03:37,068
Does not ring a bell.
94
00:03:37,069 --> 00:03:39,904
I can't tell if it's him. Is it him?
Brick, go see if it's him.
95
00:03:39,905 --> 00:03:42,674
I've never met him. How do
I know what he looks like?
96
00:03:42,675 --> 00:03:47,011
He's dreamy. He's got washboard abs.
You get lost in his eyes.
97
00:03:47,012 --> 00:03:49,582
Oh, yeah. That's him.
98
00:03:52,151 --> 00:03:53,852
Ugh, what is he doing here?
99
00:03:53,853 --> 00:03:55,887
I mean, yeah,
we had a great time at prom,
100
00:03:55,888 --> 00:03:57,956
but then he went to
Texas for the Summer,
101
00:03:57,957 --> 00:04:00,125
and I texted him,
but he never texted me back,
102
00:04:00,126 --> 00:04:02,527
which could be explained
by bad cell service,
103
00:04:02,528 --> 00:04:04,762
'cause I don't know what the
service is like in Texas.
104
00:04:04,763 --> 00:04:05,930
[Chuckles]
105
00:04:05,931 --> 00:04:07,098
Oh, well.
Let's go to the library.
106
00:04:07,099 --> 00:04:08,566
Wait, wait, wait, Brick, Brick.
107
00:04:08,567 --> 00:04:11,803
What am I supposed to say to him?
I am drawing a total blank.
108
00:04:11,804 --> 00:04:15,840
Will you please just come with me until
you see that it's going well between us?
109
00:04:15,841 --> 00:04:17,143
Fine.
110
00:04:18,477 --> 00:04:20,111
[Gasps] Oh!
Okay, they're leaving.
111
00:04:20,112 --> 00:04:21,846
Uh, um,
how do I get his attention?
112
00:04:21,847 --> 00:04:24,048
What's a fun, caszh way
to get him to notice me?
113
00:04:24,049 --> 00:04:27,418
Every time I practiced this in my
mind, we were at a market in Paris,
114
00:04:27,419 --> 00:04:28,920
and we both reached
for the same baguette.
115
00:04:28,921 --> 00:04:30,855
[Gasps] Maybe they're
going to the cafeteria.
116
00:04:30,856 --> 00:04:31,890
I can follow him.
117
00:04:31,891 --> 00:04:33,091
Ah!
118
00:04:33,092 --> 00:04:37,428
Sue!
Is that you?
119
00:04:37,429 --> 00:04:39,464
Logan? [Chuckles]
120
00:04:39,465 --> 00:04:42,066
Wow, what are you doing here?
121
00:04:42,067 --> 00:04:43,902
I, uh...
I road-tripped down from Purdue
122
00:04:43,903 --> 00:04:46,004
'cause, uh, my buddy's
playing in the soccer game.
123
00:04:46,005 --> 00:04:49,107
Oh, big college road trip.
That's exciting.
124
00:04:49,108 --> 00:04:50,875
Yeah.
125
00:04:50,876 --> 00:04:53,077
Uh, wow,
I haven't seen you since prom.
126
00:04:53,078 --> 00:04:54,112
Yeah.
127
00:04:54,113 --> 00:04:56,014
- I like your haircut.
- Yeah?
128
00:04:56,015 --> 00:04:57,882
Thank you. [Chuckles]
129
00:04:57,883 --> 00:05:00,051
Was that 'cause of the cheese?
130
00:05:00,052 --> 00:05:03,421
[Laughs] No.
The cheese came out fine.
131
00:05:03,422 --> 00:05:05,957
I burned it off with a
garage-sale curling iron.
132
00:05:05,958 --> 00:05:06,991
Ah.
133
00:05:06,992 --> 00:05:08,726
[Both laugh]
134
00:05:08,727 --> 00:05:10,595
Excuse me, Logan.
Would you say this is going well?
135
00:05:10,596 --> 00:05:12,363
Brick!
136
00:05:12,364 --> 00:05:16,467
Perhaps you would like to go on ahead to
the library, and I will meet you there.
137
00:05:16,468 --> 00:05:17,735
It's going well.
138
00:05:17,736 --> 00:05:19,837
[Sighs]
139
00:05:19,838 --> 00:05:22,373
[Both chuckle]
140
00:05:22,374 --> 00:05:24,976
Uh, I remembered you said
you were going to East Indy.
141
00:05:24,977 --> 00:05:26,778
I was hoping I'd run into you.
142
00:05:26,779 --> 00:05:28,146
[Chuckles]
143
00:05:28,147 --> 00:05:29,647
I would have called,
but after I gave you my number
144
00:05:29,648 --> 00:05:31,015
and didn't hear from you,
I thought, you know,
145
00:05:31,016 --> 00:05:32,150
"she doesn't want
to talk to me."
146
00:05:32,151 --> 00:05:34,752
What? No. No. No, no, no.
I swear I texted you.
147
00:05:34,753 --> 00:05:36,087
I wrote, "howdy, pardner.
How's Texas?"
148
00:05:36,088 --> 00:05:37,755
And then didn't
hear anything back.
149
00:05:37,756 --> 00:05:42,093
- What? What number did you have?
- 812-555-0122.
150
00:05:42,094 --> 00:05:43,695
I think. [Chuckles]
151
00:05:43,696 --> 00:05:47,365
- Ah, no, you were one number off.
- So you weren't ignoring me.
152
00:05:47,366 --> 00:05:49,367
I thought it was the "howdy,
pardner" that threw you.
153
00:05:49,368 --> 00:05:51,135
I was debating whether to
put that or, "hey, y'all,"
154
00:05:51,136 --> 00:05:52,670
- and I put the h...
- Logan, let's go.
155
00:05:52,671 --> 00:05:55,006
Uh...
156
00:05:55,007 --> 00:05:57,775
You know what? Uh, if you're
not doing anything later,
157
00:05:57,776 --> 00:05:59,497
maybe we could grab dinner
or something before...
158
00:05:59,521 --> 00:06:00,209
Yes!
159
00:06:00,646 --> 00:06:03,414
[Chuckles] Yeah. Yeah, I'm...
Yeah. I mean, sure.
160
00:06:03,415 --> 00:06:04,749
Cool. [Chuckles]
161
00:06:04,750 --> 00:06:06,484
Whatevs. I'm flex.
162
00:06:06,485 --> 00:06:09,687
All right.
Uh, meet you here, say 5:00?
163
00:06:09,688 --> 00:06:11,789
I promise I won't take you
anywhere with potatoes.
164
00:06:11,790 --> 00:06:12,790
[Chuckles]
165
00:06:12,791 --> 00:06:14,592
Lates!
166
00:06:14,593 --> 00:06:17,730
167
00:06:20,866 --> 00:06:22,968
[Sighs]
168
00:06:25,404 --> 00:06:26,871
Hey. There's my guy.
169
00:06:26,872 --> 00:06:28,673
I've been waiting
for you to get home.
170
00:06:28,674 --> 00:06:30,875
How about taking this biker
babe on a little ride?
171
00:06:30,876 --> 00:06:32,577
- No, thanks.
- Oh, come on.
172
00:06:32,578 --> 00:06:34,846
I mean, I admit, when you
first brought the bike home,
173
00:06:34,847 --> 00:06:37,782
I wasn't so sure, but I think
it could be a lot of fun.
174
00:06:37,783 --> 00:06:39,817
Besides, you haven't even
taken me out once yet.
175
00:06:39,818 --> 00:06:43,121
Eh, it's running a little rough.
Might need a tune-up.
176
00:06:43,122 --> 00:06:44,789
All right.
177
00:06:44,790 --> 00:06:47,125
Hey, how about a little
hoop ball instead, huh?
178
00:06:47,126 --> 00:06:49,794
Yeah, that's right.
Let's go, shorty.
179
00:06:49,795 --> 00:06:51,829
Loser defrosts dinner, huh?
180
00:06:51,830 --> 00:06:54,098
Think you can stop me?
You think you can stop me?
181
00:06:54,099 --> 00:06:55,934
I don't think so. Whoo!
182
00:06:58,570 --> 00:07:00,972
Seriously, Mike,
what is up with you?
183
00:07:00,973 --> 00:07:02,774
It'll pass.
184
00:07:02,775 --> 00:07:04,809
Well, I tried.
185
00:07:04,810 --> 00:07:06,577
He said it would pass.
186
00:07:06,578 --> 00:07:08,847
Maybe I just needed
to let it pass.
187
00:07:10,780 --> 00:07:14,216
Apparently, ferrets like to eat couches
more than they like to eat ants,
188
00:07:14,378 --> 00:07:15,827
so Axl and hutch
had to improvise.
189
00:07:16,101 --> 00:07:18,812
I am telling you,
this hammock thing is awesome.
190
00:07:18,812 --> 00:07:21,714
Couches are so last year.
My Mom sits on a couch.
191
00:07:21,715 --> 00:07:23,649
I'm not a fan.
I had a lady over last night,
192
00:07:23,650 --> 00:07:25,618
trying to make the
hammock-to-hammock transfer,
193
00:07:25,619 --> 00:07:29,622
and I ended up on the floor with a
face full of ants, and she bolted.
194
00:07:29,623 --> 00:07:32,424
So what you're saying is you
basically had a woman in a net,
195
00:07:32,425 --> 00:07:33,692
and you let her get away.
196
00:07:33,693 --> 00:07:35,761
These stupid ants are
ruining our lives!
197
00:07:35,762 --> 00:07:38,464
Well, it's not our fault.
It's the landlords'.
198
00:07:38,465 --> 00:07:41,367
How many times have we
complained to Derek and Andy
199
00:07:41,368 --> 00:07:43,702
about this dump,
and nothing's been done?!
200
00:07:43,703 --> 00:07:45,504
There's gaps in the floors!
201
00:07:45,505 --> 00:07:48,507
The back door doesn't close all the way.
That's how the ferret escaped.
202
00:07:48,508 --> 00:07:50,409
I can't even sleep upstairs
with that leaky pipe,
203
00:07:50,410 --> 00:07:52,178
and the drips don't
even happen evenly.
204
00:07:52,179 --> 00:07:53,846
They're like, "bloop...
205
00:07:53,847 --> 00:07:55,347
Bloop-bloop, bloop-bloop!"
206
00:07:55,348 --> 00:07:56,549
There's no rhythm to it.
207
00:07:56,550 --> 00:07:57,917
How am I supposed
to sleep to that?
208
00:07:57,918 --> 00:08:00,319
Well, it's gonna stop.
209
00:08:00,320 --> 00:08:02,588
We pay rent. We have rights.
210
00:08:02,589 --> 00:08:05,324
It's time we stopped complaining
like a bunch of little boys
211
00:08:05,325 --> 00:08:08,594
and start demanding some
changes around here!
212
00:08:08,595 --> 00:08:11,530
We are not gonna get treated like
men until we start acting like men!
213
00:08:11,531 --> 00:08:14,433
You're damn right.
I say we man up right now.
214
00:08:14,434 --> 00:08:15,634
What are you doing?
215
00:08:15,635 --> 00:08:17,303
I'm writing a letter
to our landlords
216
00:08:17,304 --> 00:08:18,871
telling them everything that's
wrong with this place...
217
00:08:18,872 --> 00:08:20,739
On my Dad's stationery.
218
00:08:20,740 --> 00:08:22,942
No one likes to get yelled
at by a dermatologist.
219
00:08:22,943 --> 00:08:25,311
A letter?
What is this, "Downtown Abbey"?
220
00:08:25,312 --> 00:08:27,646
That's not being a man.
Being a man is calling.
221
00:08:27,647 --> 00:08:30,349
We're not gonna put
some letter in the mail
222
00:08:30,350 --> 00:08:31,951
and wait days for a response.
223
00:08:31,952 --> 00:08:35,187
No, we are men!
Men demand immediate results.
224
00:08:35,188 --> 00:08:36,722
I like results.
225
00:08:36,723 --> 00:08:38,691
Yeah, and you know we're not
getting any from Derek and Andy.
226
00:08:38,692 --> 00:08:40,392
You know what?
They had their chance.
227
00:08:40,393 --> 00:08:42,261
Forget them.
We're going over their heads.
228
00:08:42,262 --> 00:08:43,896
We're gonna call the
city and report them
229
00:08:43,897 --> 00:08:45,397
'cause that's what men do.
230
00:08:45,398 --> 00:08:48,367
I like being a man.
I feel so powerful!
231
00:08:48,368 --> 00:08:49,902
[Ringing]
232
00:08:49,903 --> 00:08:51,503
Woman: You have reached
233
00:08:51,504 --> 00:08:53,305
the city of Gumford
housing complaint line.
234
00:08:53,306 --> 00:08:55,674
Please hold.
Your call is important to us.
235
00:08:55,675 --> 00:08:58,644
[Muzak plays]
236
00:08:58,645 --> 00:09:01,447
Oh! Don't lose that anger.
237
00:09:01,448 --> 00:09:03,583
Dance mad,
even though we like this song.
238
00:09:07,354 --> 00:09:09,288
239
00:09:09,289 --> 00:09:12,725
So it may not have been baguettes
in Paris, but Sue had a date.
240
00:09:12,726 --> 00:09:16,829
That settled, she floated to the
designated spot in front of the library
241
00:09:16,830 --> 00:09:18,364
to meet Brick.
242
00:09:18,365 --> 00:09:20,432
Brick?
243
00:09:20,433 --> 00:09:22,535
Brick?
244
00:09:23,737 --> 00:09:26,572
Brick?
245
00:09:26,573 --> 00:09:29,908
Bri-i-i-i-i-i-ck!
246
00:09:29,909 --> 00:09:31,544
[Knock on door]
247
00:09:36,650 --> 00:09:39,351
Welcome! Come in. Come in.
248
00:09:39,352 --> 00:09:41,920
Um, we don't have any more
buckets or milk crates,
249
00:09:41,921 --> 00:09:44,256
so you might have to
walk on some ants.
250
00:09:44,257 --> 00:09:47,293
Are you the guys who registered
a complaint with the city?
251
00:09:47,294 --> 00:09:51,797
Yes, we are the men who
registered said complaint, yes.
252
00:09:51,798 --> 00:09:53,832
Thank you for coming
out so expeditiously.
253
00:09:53,833 --> 00:09:55,901
We were very impressed
with your response.
254
00:09:55,902 --> 00:09:57,436
Indeed.
255
00:09:57,437 --> 00:09:59,839
We have a lot of complaints.
Hutch, the list.
256
00:10:02,676 --> 00:10:04,276
I'm not with the city.
257
00:10:04,277 --> 00:10:07,279
The city called me
because I'm the landlord.
258
00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:10,716
I'm from KHB
property management.
259
00:10:10,717 --> 00:10:13,285
We rented this house to Derek
and Andy five years ago,
260
00:10:13,286 --> 00:10:15,220
and from the look of things,
261
00:10:15,221 --> 00:10:18,457
it would seem they've been
illegally subletting to you.
262
00:10:18,458 --> 00:10:20,826
Look, I don't know what
you're implying here,
263
00:10:20,827 --> 00:10:23,362
but we have complete
authority to live here.
264
00:10:23,363 --> 00:10:26,498
We've been putting $550
under a rock every month
265
00:10:26,499 --> 00:10:28,801
for like... Over a year.
266
00:10:28,802 --> 00:10:31,437
First of all, the rent is $400.
267
00:10:31,438 --> 00:10:32,971
Oh! Derek and Andy, not cool!
268
00:10:32,972 --> 00:10:34,606
And under the
terms of the lease,
269
00:10:34,607 --> 00:10:38,477
we have the right to evict any and
all tenants effective immediately.
270
00:10:38,478 --> 00:10:39,611
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
271
00:10:39,612 --> 00:10:40,946
Come on, man.
You can't kick us out.
272
00:10:40,947 --> 00:10:42,848
- We're just little kids.
- Little kids, man.
273
00:10:42,849 --> 00:10:44,383
Take the blocks off. Show him how
little we are. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
274
00:10:44,384 --> 00:10:45,851
Look at how little we are.
275
00:10:45,852 --> 00:10:47,486
Check this out.
You're not even gonna believe it.
276
00:10:47,487 --> 00:10:48,487
It'll blow your mind.
277
00:10:48,488 --> 00:10:51,423
278
00:10:51,424 --> 00:10:52,424
Oh!
279
00:10:52,425 --> 00:10:55,194
I am so sorry I am late, but
you're not gonna believe this.
280
00:10:55,195 --> 00:10:58,598
- Are you ready to go to dinner?
- Sure.
281
00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:01,667
No! Oh, wait. I'm sorry.
282
00:11:01,668 --> 00:11:04,303
I want to, but I can't
'cause I lost my little brother.
283
00:11:04,304 --> 00:11:05,804
You don't understand.
He wanders.
284
00:11:05,805 --> 00:11:07,239
He's a wanderer.
285
00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:08,574
And if he's wandering
and reading, then...
286
00:11:08,575 --> 00:11:10,576
Sue, Sue, look at me.
It's gonna be okay.
287
00:11:10,577 --> 00:11:15,280
You and I will walk this whole campus if
we have to, but we are gonna find him.
288
00:11:15,281 --> 00:11:17,649
- Who?
- Your brother.
289
00:11:17,650 --> 00:11:20,219
Right, right.
Right, right, right.
290
00:11:20,220 --> 00:11:24,858
You know, actually, let's walk this
way 'cause more people will see us.
291
00:11:28,795 --> 00:11:32,431
- Are the Colts not playing?
- Yeah, they are.
292
00:11:32,432 --> 00:11:37,473
- You're not watching?
- Nah. I don't feel like it.
293
00:11:37,871 --> 00:11:42,174
All right, when Mike stops watching the
Colts, something is seriously wrong.
294
00:11:42,175 --> 00:11:44,209
I needed professional help.
295
00:11:44,210 --> 00:11:46,846
Well, hello, there,
Frankie Heck.
296
00:11:49,068 --> 00:11:50,501
- [Door closes]
- Frankie: Hey, Mike.
297
00:11:50,502 --> 00:11:51,903
Look who's here...
Reverend Timtom.
298
00:11:52,774 --> 00:11:54,475
Hey, why don't you entertain
him while I go look
299
00:11:54,476 --> 00:11:55,676
for the stuff to donate
to the church rummage sale
300
00:11:55,677 --> 00:11:58,479
that he drove all
the way here to get?
301
00:11:59,116 --> 00:12:02,985
- So, how's it going, Mike?
- Ah, it goes.
302
00:12:02,986 --> 00:12:05,287
Well,
I'm glad to hear it's going.
303
00:12:05,289 --> 00:12:07,224
Me? I'm going, too.
304
00:12:07,225 --> 00:12:09,326
Been at a charity car
wash all weekend...
305
00:12:09,327 --> 00:12:10,894
Suds for the Savior.
306
00:12:10,895 --> 00:12:13,396
Biggest car wash in
the history of Iowa.
307
00:12:13,397 --> 00:12:16,533
Even baptized a couple
of kids in a soap bucket.
308
00:12:16,534 --> 00:12:18,201
That's great. Good for them.
309
00:12:18,202 --> 00:12:22,202
So... No problems?
Life treating you okay?
310
00:12:23,141 --> 00:12:25,208
Yep. A-okay.
311
00:12:25,209 --> 00:12:26,476
Frankie: Reverend Timtom?
312
00:12:26,477 --> 00:12:28,178
Hey, could I just
see you for a second?
313
00:12:28,179 --> 00:12:29,547
Oh.
314
00:12:33,151 --> 00:12:37,487
Look, I should have told you this
before, but you can't go right at him.
315
00:12:37,488 --> 00:12:39,389
He's like an animal
you're trying to catch.
316
00:12:39,390 --> 00:12:41,091
If he senses you coming,
he's gone.
317
00:12:41,092 --> 00:12:44,127
You got to go around and
sneak up on the problem.
318
00:12:44,128 --> 00:12:45,962
But you understand,
as a man of the cloth,
319
00:12:45,963 --> 00:12:48,565
if he asks me why I'm really here,
I've got to tell him the truth.
320
00:12:48,566 --> 00:12:52,402
- What? Why?
- Well, lying is a sin.
321
00:12:52,403 --> 00:12:56,206
Is it though? I don't really
think all sins are the same.
322
00:12:56,207 --> 00:13:00,477
I mean, lying certainly isn't as big of a
sin as, say... I don't know... murder.
323
00:13:00,478 --> 00:13:03,647
- Well, I-I guess you're right.
- I know I'm right.
324
00:13:03,648 --> 00:13:05,649
Now, go out there and
knock my socks off.
325
00:13:05,650 --> 00:13:07,918
And remember, go around.
326
00:13:07,919 --> 00:13:10,320
327
00:13:10,321 --> 00:13:14,024
Oh, my God.
There's 10 different floors.
328
00:13:14,025 --> 00:13:16,092
Sue, Sue, look in my eyes.
329
00:13:16,093 --> 00:13:17,594
It's okay.
330
00:13:17,595 --> 00:13:19,095
What is?
331
00:13:19,096 --> 00:13:20,664
Right. Brick.
332
00:13:20,665 --> 00:13:21,965
Yeah. Brick.
333
00:13:21,966 --> 00:13:23,033
[Sighs]
334
00:13:23,034 --> 00:13:24,568
Maybe we should split up.
335
00:13:24,569 --> 00:13:26,970
[Sighs] Of course we should.
336
00:13:26,971 --> 00:13:31,374
You're a shirtless God,
and I am a lowly potato girl.
337
00:13:31,375 --> 00:13:34,211
I-I meant split up and,
you know, look for your brother.
338
00:13:34,212 --> 00:13:37,981
Got it!
That's what I meant, too.
339
00:13:37,982 --> 00:13:40,150
[Chuckles]
340
00:13:40,151 --> 00:13:41,184
No.
341
00:13:41,185 --> 00:13:43,186
Brick?
342
00:13:43,187 --> 00:13:45,155
Brick?
343
00:13:45,156 --> 00:13:46,556
Brick?!
344
00:13:46,557 --> 00:13:48,926
Brick?
345
00:13:52,630 --> 00:13:54,364
[Chuckles]
346
00:13:54,365 --> 00:13:57,133
[Sighs] Brick! Where were you?
347
00:13:57,134 --> 00:13:59,970
Well,
you said go to the library,
348
00:13:59,971 --> 00:14:01,404
but on the campus
map you gave me,
349
00:14:01,405 --> 00:14:03,139
there were 12 libraries,
so I just went
350
00:14:03,140 --> 00:14:05,242
and stood in front of each
one for a little while.
351
00:14:05,243 --> 00:14:06,309
Also, I got a burrito.
352
00:14:06,310 --> 00:14:08,144
Wait, why were you outside?
353
00:14:08,145 --> 00:14:10,547
Well, they wouldn't let me
in without a student I.D..
354
00:14:10,548 --> 00:14:13,216
I didn't even get a chance
to read a single book.
355
00:14:13,217 --> 00:14:15,953
- Why didn't you call me?
- You left your phone at home.
356
00:14:17,255 --> 00:14:18,488
Oh! Right.
357
00:14:18,489 --> 00:14:20,090
I took it out
'cause I needed room
358
00:14:20,091 --> 00:14:22,192
for my statue of a cowboy
made out of bent forks.
359
00:14:22,193 --> 00:14:25,228
Okay, Brick, do you have any idea
what could have happened to you?
360
00:14:25,229 --> 00:14:27,364
You scared me and
Logan half to death!
361
00:14:27,365 --> 00:14:29,899
[Gasps] Logan!
362
00:14:29,900 --> 00:14:31,301
Stay!
363
00:14:31,302 --> 00:14:33,870
[Door closes]
364
00:14:33,871 --> 00:14:37,307
Logan! I found him!
365
00:14:37,308 --> 00:14:39,009
Logan!
366
00:14:39,010 --> 00:14:40,577
Logan?
367
00:14:40,578 --> 00:14:41,979
Logan?
368
00:14:43,180 --> 00:14:44,382
Logan?
369
00:14:49,153 --> 00:14:52,022
So...
How about those Colts, huh?
370
00:14:52,023 --> 00:14:54,024
[Chuckles] Didn't
watch them today.
371
00:14:54,025 --> 00:14:55,625
Well, now, that's interesting.
372
00:14:55,626 --> 00:14:58,295
I thought everybody around
here watched the Colts.
373
00:14:58,296 --> 00:15:03,066
Someone must have a pretty good
reason to not watch the Colts.
374
00:15:03,067 --> 00:15:06,970
- Nothing I want to talk about.
- Got it.
375
00:15:06,971 --> 00:15:10,206
Say,
you ever drive down route 42?
376
00:15:10,207 --> 00:15:13,376
You know, the one with all
the corn and that green barn?
377
00:15:13,377 --> 00:15:15,145
I love that drive.
378
00:15:15,146 --> 00:15:18,282
Reverend Timtom, can I get
another quick consult over here?
379
00:15:22,286 --> 00:15:23,553
[Sighs]
380
00:15:23,554 --> 00:15:25,322
Look,
I don't know where you're going
381
00:15:25,323 --> 00:15:27,991
with this route 42 stuff,
but you're dying out there.
382
00:15:27,992 --> 00:15:29,292
I mean, green barn?
383
00:15:29,293 --> 00:15:31,027
That is not exactly
your best work.
384
00:15:31,028 --> 00:15:32,462
Mike can see it a mile away.
385
00:15:32,463 --> 00:15:34,230
Oh, I'm sorry.
386
00:15:34,231 --> 00:15:36,900
W-what exactly would
you like me to say?
387
00:15:36,901 --> 00:15:38,935
Well [Scoffs] I'm not gonna
spoon-feed you the words.
388
00:15:38,936 --> 00:15:40,303
You're the expert.
389
00:15:40,304 --> 00:15:44,607
All I know is I can't afford a real
therapist, so I really need you to fix him.
390
00:15:44,608 --> 00:15:47,043
Okay, I don't mean to be
a fly in the holy water,
391
00:15:47,044 --> 00:15:49,112
but you're kind of
getting in my head here.
392
00:15:49,113 --> 00:15:50,980
You know, I'm not used to
getting all these notes.
393
00:15:50,981 --> 00:15:53,049
I-I usually operate with
one shepherd guiding me,
394
00:15:53,050 --> 00:15:54,951
and that's the big guy upstairs.
395
00:15:54,952 --> 00:15:57,087
Yeah, and if that were working,
that would be great,
396
00:15:57,088 --> 00:15:59,389
but in the meantime,
I need you to kick it up a notch.
397
00:15:59,390 --> 00:16:01,291
We're not dealing with
some eighth grader
398
00:16:01,292 --> 00:16:03,393
who didn't get asked on a
date to the roller rink.
399
00:16:03,394 --> 00:16:05,528
We got a seven-foot
wall of pain out there.
400
00:16:05,529 --> 00:16:08,498
Now get back in and give me your
"A" game!
401
00:16:08,499 --> 00:16:10,967
[Sighs]
402
00:16:10,968 --> 00:16:13,537
[Ukulele playing]
403
00:16:15,272 --> 00:16:16,873
I hope you don't mind.
404
00:16:16,874 --> 00:16:20,944
I haven't picked one of these up
since the Lord's luau for leprosy.
405
00:16:20,945 --> 00:16:23,880
I saw it lying there and
thought I'd play a little.
406
00:16:23,881 --> 00:16:26,883
Oh, Jesus never got to
have no midlife crisis
407
00:16:26,884 --> 00:16:29,519
No sports car, hair plugs,
young blonde wiveses
408
00:16:29,520 --> 00:16:32,422
Never traded his robes
for tight jeans one day
409
00:16:32,423 --> 00:16:35,291
He never quit his job
to go write a screenplay
410
00:16:35,292 --> 00:16:38,161
Oh, Jesus never got to
have no midlife crisis
411
00:16:38,162 --> 00:16:40,997
No tattoos, veneers,
Botox around the eyeses
412
00:16:40,998 --> 00:16:43,566
He never showed up with
his hair and beard dyed
413
00:16:43,567 --> 00:16:45,535
Never got the chance
'cause at only 33
414
00:16:45,536 --> 00:16:46,970
He was crucified
415
00:16:46,971 --> 00:16:48,872
Oh, Jesus never...
416
00:16:48,873 --> 00:16:51,141
Look,
I-I-I appreciate the effort,
417
00:16:51,142 --> 00:16:54,979
and I get you had to drive over here
and everything, but this is not...
418
00:16:57,448 --> 00:16:59,983
It's just not.
419
00:16:59,984 --> 00:17:03,187
Good luck with the rummage sale.
420
00:17:04,488 --> 00:17:08,892
[Sighs] Look, you were great.
Just a little off tonight.
421
00:17:08,893 --> 00:17:10,326
I mean, Mike's tough.
It was a hard one.
422
00:17:10,327 --> 00:17:12,896
I just think if I had my guitar,
I could have done it.
423
00:17:12,897 --> 00:17:14,297
The gravity of the message...
424
00:17:14,298 --> 00:17:16,466
It doesn't [Strums note]
come across on the ukulele.
425
00:17:16,467 --> 00:17:18,902
Can I come back tomorrow
and take another crack?
426
00:17:18,903 --> 00:17:20,437
Nope, nope, nope, nope.
It's done.
427
00:17:20,438 --> 00:17:22,505
We had a window,
and we just didn't hit it.
428
00:17:22,506 --> 00:17:25,909
But, uh, don't worry.
I'll use you again.
429
00:17:25,910 --> 00:17:27,310
Have a good night.
430
00:17:27,311 --> 00:17:29,913
431
00:17:29,914 --> 00:17:31,315
[Sighs]
432
00:17:32,917 --> 00:17:35,952
Really, Frankie? The roving rev?
433
00:17:35,953 --> 00:17:38,455
Look, I'm sorry.
I didn't know what else to do.
434
00:17:38,456 --> 00:17:42,125
I mean, all you do is walk around
here, staring out windows.
435
00:17:42,126 --> 00:17:46,229
You know, a regular-size person
radiates about this much mopey.
436
00:17:46,230 --> 00:17:51,201
But you're big, so you make this big
mope cloud that just covers everything.
437
00:17:51,202 --> 00:17:54,204
I told you. I just need a little time.
It'll pass.
438
00:17:54,205 --> 00:17:55,538
Will it, Mike? Will it pass?
439
00:17:55,539 --> 00:17:59,409
'Cause you've been saying it'll pass,
and guess what... It's still here.
440
00:17:59,410 --> 00:18:00,910
Okay.
441
00:18:00,911 --> 00:18:02,011
You really want to
know what's bugging me?
442
00:18:02,012 --> 00:18:06,049
[Sighs] Yes! Have I not made
myself clear until now?
443
00:18:06,050 --> 00:18:08,952
Fine.
You're turning 50.
444
00:18:08,953 --> 00:18:12,489
- Wait, what?
- Yeah, I know.
445
00:18:12,490 --> 00:18:14,257
It's just... I don't know.
It's just bugging me.
446
00:18:14,258 --> 00:18:16,226
You're bugged that
I'm turning 50?
447
00:18:16,227 --> 00:18:18,595
Your birthday's coming up,
and suddenly, it just hit me...
448
00:18:18,596 --> 00:18:20,563
I'm gonna be married
to a 50-year-old woman.
449
00:18:20,564 --> 00:18:24,634
Oh, my God. Seriously?
You turned 50 over a year ago.
450
00:18:24,635 --> 00:18:26,402
Yeah,
it didn't bug me the same way.
451
00:18:26,403 --> 00:18:30,073
Really, Mike? Really? You're
stealing my midlife crisis.
452
00:18:30,074 --> 00:18:32,275
So, what,
you want to have an affair? Hmm?
453
00:18:32,276 --> 00:18:34,277
You want a new wife now?
Is that it?
454
00:18:34,278 --> 00:18:37,046
No. You're... Fine.
455
00:18:37,047 --> 00:18:40,250
But this isn't about you.
This is about us getting old.
456
00:18:40,251 --> 00:18:43,219
Hell,
I read that Fonzie is turning 70.
457
00:18:43,220 --> 00:18:46,656
What kind of world do we
live in where the Fonz is 70?
458
00:18:46,657 --> 00:18:48,458
Okay, I...
459
00:18:48,459 --> 00:18:50,260
I guess I'm just
kind of surprised
460
00:18:50,261 --> 00:18:54,531
'cause you don't usually have these type
of feelings, or any feelings, really.
461
00:18:54,532 --> 00:18:58,968
You think I don't know that? I'm pissed
at myself. I'm a stupid clich??.
462
00:18:58,969 --> 00:19:00,436
I feel like I'm one
of Sue's posters.
463
00:19:00,437 --> 00:19:02,105
Okay,
you're kind of scaring me now.
464
00:19:02,106 --> 00:19:05,308
You know, it's like when you get turbulence
and the flight attendant sits down
465
00:19:05,309 --> 00:19:06,910
and you know it's time to panic.
466
00:19:06,911 --> 00:19:10,113
You're my flight attendant. So stand
up and get the beverage cart moving.
467
00:19:10,114 --> 00:19:11,481
I will.
468
00:19:11,482 --> 00:19:16,653
I told you it'll pass, but you keep prying
and sending reverends with ukuleles.
469
00:19:16,654 --> 00:19:18,488
I told him to go around.
470
00:19:18,489 --> 00:19:21,291
Look,
this isn't that big a deal.
471
00:19:21,292 --> 00:19:24,427
I-I-I just... lately,
I've been feeling...
472
00:19:24,428 --> 00:19:26,329
I don't know.
473
00:19:26,330 --> 00:19:29,132
In my life, I always know
what the next thing is,
474
00:19:29,133 --> 00:19:31,534
and I just do the next
thing and the next thing.
475
00:19:31,535 --> 00:19:34,938
And now with the kids off at
school and the house half empty,
476
00:19:34,939 --> 00:19:36,940
I don't know what
the next thing is.
477
00:19:36,941 --> 00:19:43,294
And then when I think about it, and...
All I could come up with is death.
478
00:19:51,555 --> 00:19:55,058
[Sighs]
479
00:19:55,059 --> 00:19:58,061
Well, maybe we should be like
those bone-density people.
480
00:19:58,062 --> 00:20:00,063
You know,
the ones in the commercial?
481
00:20:00,064 --> 00:20:01,998
They take the
bone-density stuff,
482
00:20:01,999 --> 00:20:06,169
and then their bones are strong and
they end up living an active lifestyle,
483
00:20:06,170 --> 00:20:09,038
you know,
refurbishing furniture together,
484
00:20:09,039 --> 00:20:12,041
walking through the
woods with big visors on.
485
00:20:12,042 --> 00:20:14,444
486
00:20:14,445 --> 00:20:15,912
[Door closes]
487
00:20:15,913 --> 00:20:17,180
That was a miserable weekend.
488
00:20:17,181 --> 00:20:18,615
I was at 12 libraries,
489
00:20:18,616 --> 00:20:20,316
and I didn't get a chance
to read a single book.
490
00:20:20,317 --> 00:20:21,951
Do you know what that's
like for a person like me?
491
00:20:21,952 --> 00:20:24,420
Yeah, it's kind of like
not getting to kiss Logan.
492
00:20:24,421 --> 00:20:25,655
- [Door closes]
- I was this close!
493
00:20:25,656 --> 00:20:29,225
Now, before you freak out, we
don't want to be here, either.
494
00:20:29,226 --> 00:20:33,529
Apparently, Derek and Andy were not the
badass landlords we thought they were.
495
00:20:33,530 --> 00:20:36,265
Our real landlord is some
dingus named Mr. Callen
496
00:20:36,266 --> 00:20:38,868
who red-tagged our
house and kicked us out.
497
00:20:38,869 --> 00:20:42,405
- Hang on. You got evicted?
- Yeah.
498
00:20:42,406 --> 00:20:44,607
Apparently, our house is deemed
"unfit for human habitation,"
499
00:20:44,608 --> 00:20:46,609
but, I mean,
shouldn't that be our judgment?
500
00:20:46,610 --> 00:20:48,144
Mom! Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom!
501
00:20:48,145 --> 00:20:51,280
Okay, and the worst part is, what
if Logan thinks I ditched him?
502
00:20:51,281 --> 00:20:52,949
He doesn't have my phone number,
and the number I have for him
503
00:20:52,950 --> 00:20:55,385
is one number off,
but I don't know which one it is.
504
00:20:55,386 --> 00:20:56,894
What am I supposed to do, just start dialing
numbers?
505
00:20:56,894 --> 00:20:59,088
Anyway, we're gonna be crashing here for the
next couple of weeks till we figure it out.
506
00:20:59,089 --> 00:21:01,933
- We're gonna crash here?
- I appreciate it, Mr. heck.
507
00:21:01,991 --> 00:21:03,259
And I hate to be a burden,
but is there a way
508
00:21:03,360 --> 00:21:06,329
we could set up a shower
schedule or something?
509
00:21:10,501 --> 00:21:12,168
- [All talking]
- Turns out... All this life crap
510
00:21:12,169 --> 00:21:14,604
is just one big
distraction from death.
511
00:21:14,605 --> 00:21:16,572
But it's a pretty good one.
512
00:21:16,573 --> 00:21:19,542
So that's why you got to keep
the hope peas on the shelf.
513
00:21:19,543 --> 00:21:23,177
And for the love of God,
stay too busy to think.
514
00:21:23,227 --> 00:21:27,777
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