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[Crow caws]
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00:00:02,624 --> 00:00:04,982
Synced and Corrected by Nsiko
www.Addic7ed.com
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Frankie: Out here in the middle,
4
00:00:06,822 --> 00:00:09,257
there are a lot of two-job families.
5
00:00:09,325 --> 00:00:12,327
In our case, we're about
a four or five-job family.
6
00:00:12,394 --> 00:00:15,630
Okay, you are all booked
to rapid city, south Dakota.
7
00:00:15,698 --> 00:00:17,398
Now, we know you have
a choice in air travel,
8
00:00:17,466 --> 00:00:19,534
so we appreciate you flying with us.
9
00:00:19,602 --> 00:00:22,570
Yes, I know we're the only
carrier that flies there.
10
00:00:22,638 --> 00:00:25,306
Look, it's just something
we gotta say, okay?
11
00:00:25,374 --> 00:00:28,009
Mike and I were like two
ships passing in the night...
12
00:00:28,077 --> 00:00:31,813
Two tired, Rusty, "should
started a college fund" ships.
13
00:00:38,387 --> 00:00:40,989
Yep, our anniversary
was pretty lame, as usual.
14
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We don't normally care all that much,
15
00:00:43,259 --> 00:00:44,592
but it's a lot harder
16
00:00:44,660 --> 00:00:46,427
when you're staring
young love in the face.
17
00:00:48,764 --> 00:00:50,732
Darrin's been carrying me everywhere today.
18
00:00:50,799 --> 00:00:52,600
My feet haven't touched the ground once.
19
00:00:52,668 --> 00:00:54,769
That's because I've
declared it "Sue Heck week."
20
00:00:54,837 --> 00:00:56,104
- For no reason.
- Ah!
21
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- Where to, my love?
- Fro-yo!
22
00:00:59,208 --> 00:00:59,974
Aah!
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00:01:00,042 --> 00:01:02,043
I'm okay!
24
00:01:02,111 --> 00:01:04,279
Sue: Darrin filled my room with balloons!
25
00:01:04,346 --> 00:01:05,380
Can you believe it?!
26
00:01:07,216 --> 00:01:08,716
[Indistinct talking on television]
27
00:01:08,784 --> 00:01:11,653
Darrin: [Singsong voice] A little warmer...
28
00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:13,388
Warmer...
29
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A little cooler.
30
00:01:15,558 --> 00:01:17,358
Cold...
31
00:01:17,426 --> 00:01:18,693
Now you're freezing.
32
00:01:18,761 --> 00:01:19,894
- A little less freezing.
- [Gasps]
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00:01:21,030 --> 00:01:22,463
Here.
34
00:01:22,531 --> 00:01:24,432
[Gasps]
35
00:01:24,500 --> 00:01:26,034
Darrin, what is this?
36
00:01:26,101 --> 00:01:27,802
Pioneer galaxy jewelers?
37
00:01:27,870 --> 00:01:29,737
At the mall?!
38
00:01:29,805 --> 00:01:30,972
That place is fancy!
39
00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:32,941
They have a security guard and everything!
40
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Open it.
41
00:01:35,177 --> 00:01:37,111
[Inhales sharply] Oh, my God.
42
00:01:37,179 --> 00:01:38,713
It's a necklace...
43
00:01:38,781 --> 00:01:41,282
With a heart and key...
44
00:01:41,350 --> 00:01:43,585
It's because she holds the key to my heart.
45
00:01:43,652 --> 00:01:45,186
Yeah, Darrin, we get it.
46
00:01:47,423 --> 00:01:48,523
[Sighs]
47
00:01:49,770 --> 00:01:51,537
Dude, like, how many different things
48
00:01:51,605 --> 00:01:53,239
do we have to write checks for?
49
00:01:53,306 --> 00:01:55,141
Why is there even a gas bill? Hmm?
50
00:01:55,208 --> 00:01:57,510
You don't put gas in a
house. It's not a car.
51
00:01:57,577 --> 00:01:59,412
What about water? Why
should we pay for that?
52
00:01:59,479 --> 00:02:01,480
- Stuff falls out of the sky for free.
- Yeah.
53
00:02:01,548 --> 00:02:03,759
They're making money off
God. That's just wrong.
54
00:02:03,759 --> 00:02:05,528
I'm telling you... we're gonna
have to get a couple roommates
55
00:02:05,528 --> 00:02:06,563
if we want to pay off these bills.
56
00:02:06,563 --> 00:02:09,622
A couple? [Scoffs] We need 20.
57
00:02:09,689 --> 00:02:11,023
Wait...
58
00:02:11,091 --> 00:02:12,124
That's a great idea.
59
00:02:12,192 --> 00:02:13,394
That frat house
down the street...
60
00:02:13,394 --> 00:02:16,031
it's the same size as ours,
and they're jammed with people.
61
00:02:16,031 --> 00:02:17,350
That could be us!
62
00:02:17,350 --> 00:02:20,332
If we had 20 people paying rent,
we wouldn't have to pay a dime.
63
00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:21,282
We'd be making money.
64
00:02:21,282 --> 00:02:23,335
Man, I don't want to live
with a bunch of dudes.
65
00:02:23,403 --> 00:02:25,704
So we let dudes and girls in. Hmm?
66
00:02:25,772 --> 00:02:27,840
It'd be like a fraternity and a sorority...
67
00:02:29,109 --> 00:02:30,509
a "fratority."
68
00:02:30,577 --> 00:02:32,511
Oh, hell, yes!
69
00:02:32,579 --> 00:02:33,746
What are we gonna call it?
70
00:02:33,814 --> 00:02:34,966
Well, it should have our names in it.
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00:02:34,966 --> 00:02:35,650
[Chuckles]
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00:02:35,650 --> 00:02:37,850
But we need to throw
some Greek letters at it
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00:02:37,918 --> 00:02:38,951
so people know it's legit.
74
00:02:39,019 --> 00:02:40,152
Hmm. Hmm.
75
00:02:40,220 --> 00:02:40,986
Hmm. Hmm.
76
00:02:41,054 --> 00:02:42,254
[Snap fingers]
77
00:02:42,322 --> 00:02:44,056
I got it. How about this?
78
00:02:44,124 --> 00:02:46,892
Hutch Axl pi.
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00:02:46,960 --> 00:02:48,360
Everybody loves hutch... mm.
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00:02:48,428 --> 00:02:50,062
Everybody loves Axl... well...
81
00:02:50,130 --> 00:02:51,897
And you know everybody loves pie.
82
00:02:51,965 --> 00:02:53,966
- Huh?
- Oh.
83
00:02:54,034 --> 00:02:55,634
[Both laugh]
84
00:02:55,702 --> 00:02:57,169
Check, check. Hello? Hello?
85
00:02:57,237 --> 00:02:59,972
You're not trying to face-time
the president again, are you?
86
00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:02,675
No. That's ridiculous. I'm
starting my own podcast.
87
00:03:02,742 --> 00:03:03,976
Hey, that could be fun.
88
00:03:04,018 --> 00:03:06,519
It's for the people who
are interested in fonts.
89
00:03:06,587 --> 00:03:10,056
Oh. Well, why don't you do
that and the president thing
90
00:03:10,124 --> 00:03:11,958
and see who answers first.
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00:03:12,026 --> 00:03:14,994
Hi. I'm Brick Heck, and this is...
92
00:03:15,062 --> 00:03:16,262
"The FontCast"...
93
00:03:16,330 --> 00:03:17,597
Or "footloose and fontsy free."
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00:03:17,665 --> 00:03:18,932
Still working on the title.
95
00:03:18,999 --> 00:03:21,034
Feel free to call in with suggestions.
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00:03:21,101 --> 00:03:24,270
Today's topic is the raging
debate of font versus typeface
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00:03:24,338 --> 00:03:26,673
and times new Roman's place in all of it.
98
00:03:26,740 --> 00:03:28,712
And then, in our last segment,
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00:03:28,924 --> 00:03:30,166
we'll get into the issue of kerning,
100
00:03:30,357 --> 00:03:31,837
which, for those of
you who don't know...
101
00:03:32,017 --> 00:03:32,626
[chuckling] As if...
102
00:03:32,844 --> 00:03:34,135
is the spacing between characters.
103
00:03:34,519 --> 00:03:37,588
[Washer lid closes] Now, this is a very
hot topic inside of the font community...
104
00:03:39,987 --> 00:03:42,176
- [Door opens]
- Dad, you've got to kno...
105
00:03:42,927 --> 00:03:43,867
Oh, hi, Sue!
106
00:03:43,867 --> 00:03:45,100
Brad, I just did something so crazy!
107
00:03:45,168 --> 00:03:46,735
You'll never guess what!
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00:03:46,803 --> 00:03:48,904
[Gasps] You dressed up as the
opposite gender and went out in public?
109
00:03:48,972 --> 00:03:51,240
No, even crazier. I stole Darrin's phone.
110
00:03:51,307 --> 00:03:53,308
[Gasps] Okay, I have two
questions and one comment.
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00:03:53,376 --> 00:03:54,776
How'd you do it?
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00:03:54,844 --> 00:03:56,512
J'adore that hoodie.
It makes your eyes pop.
113
00:03:56,579 --> 00:03:58,396
And why'd you steal your boyfriend's phone?
114
00:03:58,448 --> 00:04:01,280
Well, Darrin was being so amazing to me
115
00:04:01,280 --> 00:04:02,514
during the week of Sue
116
00:04:02,581 --> 00:04:04,649
with all the presents, including...
117
00:04:04,717 --> 00:04:06,151
- [Gasps]
- Love!
118
00:04:06,218 --> 00:04:07,419
I know, right?
119
00:04:07,486 --> 00:04:09,788
So now I want to do something nice for him,
120
00:04:09,855 --> 00:04:12,924
so I stole his phone to find
a picture of the two of us,
121
00:04:12,992 --> 00:04:15,193
and I want to get it put... on a blanket.
122
00:04:15,261 --> 00:04:17,762
Oh, my God! You two would
look so cute on a blanket!
123
00:04:17,830 --> 00:04:18,963
[Squealing] I know!
124
00:04:19,031 --> 00:04:21,166
Here. Help me look for a photo.
125
00:04:21,233 --> 00:04:23,034
Uh... No...
126
00:04:23,102 --> 00:04:24,269
Unh-unh...
127
00:04:24,336 --> 00:04:26,271
Ew, my hair looks bad...
128
00:04:26,338 --> 00:04:27,572
Still had braces...
129
00:04:27,640 --> 00:04:29,207
Hold on. Is that angel?
130
00:04:29,275 --> 00:04:32,277
Why does he have a picture
of his ex on his phone?
131
00:04:32,344 --> 00:04:34,012
Oh, Brad, it's fine.
132
00:04:34,080 --> 00:04:36,981
Wait a minute. What is she wearing?
133
00:04:37,049 --> 00:04:40,485
Doesn't that look like the
exact same necklace he gave me?
134
00:04:40,553 --> 00:04:41,586
Oh, my God.
135
00:04:41,654 --> 00:04:43,455
He gave a key to his heart to angel
136
00:04:43,522 --> 00:04:46,524
and then he gave a key to his heart to me?
137
00:04:48,639 --> 00:04:51,207
I thought this was the key to his heart,
138
00:04:51,275 --> 00:04:53,276
but apparently he made duplicates.
139
00:04:53,344 --> 00:04:55,578
Now, Sue, if this is true, it's devastating
140
00:04:55,646 --> 00:04:58,081
and would definitely
destroy your relationship,
141
00:04:58,149 --> 00:04:59,849
but let's not go there yet.
142
00:05:02,052 --> 00:05:03,753
Hey. What are you doing here?
143
00:05:03,821 --> 00:05:05,989
Did you know you have to pay for Wi-Fi?
144
00:05:06,056 --> 00:05:07,157
Yeah. I know.
145
00:05:07,224 --> 00:05:09,225
Well, I didn't 'cause
everything here is free.
146
00:05:09,293 --> 00:05:10,760
[Chuckles] For you, maybe.
147
00:05:10,828 --> 00:05:12,428
And by the way, if you're gonna
be living here next summer,
148
00:05:12,496 --> 00:05:14,030
we're gonna start making you pay for stuff.
149
00:05:14,098 --> 00:05:16,900
Yeah, like you're gonna
follow through on that.
150
00:05:16,967 --> 00:05:18,535
Why are you looking at tables?
151
00:05:18,602 --> 00:05:20,103
Hutch and I got some big plans.
152
00:05:20,171 --> 00:05:22,096
We're trying to class up our place,
153
00:05:22,096 --> 00:05:23,912
but we already hit all the
dumpsters, and they're empty.
154
00:05:24,116 --> 00:05:25,749
Ooh. Let's look on Craigslist.
155
00:05:25,944 --> 00:05:27,097
Scoot.
156
00:05:27,178 --> 00:05:29,279
[Clicks tongue] Let's see. Okay.
157
00:05:29,346 --> 00:05:33,449
Tents, televisions, transgender massage.
158
00:05:33,517 --> 00:05:34,751
Oh, tables.
159
00:05:34,818 --> 00:05:36,963
When are you guys gonna
be done with the computer?
160
00:05:37,154 --> 00:05:38,251
I have to do my FontCast.
161
00:05:38,628 --> 00:05:39,765
The second show is very important.
162
00:05:39,960 --> 00:05:42,158
- My fan is counting on me.
- Axl: Brick, we're busy!
163
00:05:42,158 --> 00:05:44,136
I don't think the world's gonna
miss your nerdcast for one day.
164
00:05:44,780 --> 00:05:45,895
Fine. I'll just run my "best of yesterday,"
165
00:05:45,963 --> 00:05:48,431
but I trust you two will
answer the angry letter.
166
00:05:49,709 --> 00:05:51,943
Okay. Ooh!
167
00:05:52,011 --> 00:05:53,378
What's this? Wow.
168
00:05:53,446 --> 00:05:57,315
A whole dining-room table
with chairs for only $52.
169
00:05:57,383 --> 00:05:59,951
[Chuckling] Yeah. I'm not spending $52.
170
00:06:00,019 --> 00:06:01,653
[Scoffs] This is a steal!
171
00:06:01,721 --> 00:06:04,589
Look... matched set, solid
maple, perfect condition.
172
00:06:04,657 --> 00:06:07,459
That's amazing! I can't
believe it's only 52 bucks.
173
00:06:07,527 --> 00:06:09,528
Aren't you past the age where
you get excited about stuff?
174
00:06:09,595 --> 00:06:10,962
Absolutely, but come on.
175
00:06:11,030 --> 00:06:13,665
Imagine how great that would
look in our dining room.
176
00:06:13,733 --> 00:06:16,301
Oh, it's so pretty.
177
00:06:16,369 --> 00:06:18,437
Now, I know we already
have a dining-room table,
178
00:06:18,504 --> 00:06:20,172
but seriously, if you'd seen the crap
179
00:06:20,239 --> 00:06:21,306
that it's been through...
180
00:06:21,374 --> 00:06:22,808
[Electric knife whirring]
181
00:06:23,843 --> 00:06:24,643
[Whirring stops]
182
00:06:30,616 --> 00:06:31,583
Oh!
183
00:06:34,641 --> 00:06:39,011
Yep, there's a reason why we
always have a tablecloth on it.
184
00:06:39,079 --> 00:06:40,880
And you know how I'm always saying
185
00:06:40,948 --> 00:06:43,282
the dining room is so
dark and claustrophobic?
186
00:06:43,350 --> 00:06:45,017
Sure, let's say I do. [Sighs]
187
00:06:45,085 --> 00:06:46,752
Well, this was maple.
188
00:06:46,820 --> 00:06:48,821
I mean, it would just
lighten the whole room.
189
00:06:48,889 --> 00:06:50,056
It reminds me of something
190
00:06:50,123 --> 00:06:51,824
that would be in that
movie with Diane Keaton,
191
00:06:51,892 --> 00:06:54,160
where she's the writer
and she writes and cries
192
00:06:54,227 --> 00:06:55,661
at that desk with her glasses on.
193
00:06:55,729 --> 00:06:56,662
Oh, you know the movie.
194
00:06:56,730 --> 00:06:57,596
No idea.
195
00:06:57,664 --> 00:06:58,698
Yes, you do.
196
00:06:58,765 --> 00:07:01,000
Anyway, there was this table in that movie,
197
00:07:01,068 --> 00:07:03,102
and they were always laughing around it
198
00:07:03,170 --> 00:07:04,971
and eating on plates with candles,
199
00:07:05,038 --> 00:07:07,606
and the whole house just
seemed so fresh and beachy.
200
00:07:07,674 --> 00:07:10,343
Of course, it was actually at the beach,
201
00:07:10,410 --> 00:07:12,278
so that probably
did... let's get it.
202
00:07:12,346 --> 00:07:15,162
What? What are you talking
about? We're not gonna get it.
203
00:07:15,536 --> 00:07:16,976
Who says? Let...
204
00:07:17,144 --> 00:07:18,275
[scoffs] Let's do it. Why not?
205
00:07:18,648 --> 00:07:19,585
Mike, we're trying to save for college,
206
00:07:19,653 --> 00:07:21,120
and we already have a table.
207
00:07:21,188 --> 00:07:23,589
We'll give it to Axl. It's
already wrecked anyway.
208
00:07:23,657 --> 00:07:24,623
Are you serious?
209
00:07:24,691 --> 00:07:25,658
Yeah, I am.
210
00:07:25,726 --> 00:07:27,226
We've been working our butts off.
211
00:07:27,294 --> 00:07:29,811
It's our 20-something-th anniversary.
212
00:07:30,249 --> 00:07:32,017
And besides, the next time we splurge
213
00:07:32,084 --> 00:07:33,418
on something made of wood,
214
00:07:33,486 --> 00:07:34,920
it'll probably be coffins. Oh!
215
00:07:34,987 --> 00:07:37,389
Come on. It'll be our gift to each other.
216
00:07:37,456 --> 00:07:39,991
[Sighs] But it seems so extravagant.
217
00:07:40,059 --> 00:07:42,127
I mean, can we really do that?
218
00:07:42,194 --> 00:07:44,062
Frankie, you've been
complaining about that table
219
00:07:44,130 --> 00:07:45,297
since the day we got it.
220
00:07:45,364 --> 00:07:46,565
You hate that thing.
221
00:07:46,632 --> 00:07:48,633
Come on, 20-something
years is long enough.
222
00:07:48,701 --> 00:07:49,734
You've done your time.
223
00:07:49,802 --> 00:07:51,536
Really? We're gonna do it?
224
00:07:52,538 --> 00:07:54,039
Oh, my God! We're gonna do it!
225
00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:57,042
Ooh, I got to get that thing.
It's gonna get snatched up.
226
00:08:04,984 --> 00:08:06,251
[Door opens]
227
00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:08,353
Oh, hey. I wanted to call
you, but I can't find my phone.
228
00:08:08,421 --> 00:08:09,788
Yeah, I know. I have it.
229
00:08:09,855 --> 00:08:10,956
Oh, great.
230
00:08:11,023 --> 00:08:12,223
No, not great, Darrin.
231
00:08:13,723 --> 00:08:16,025
I stole it to find a
picture of the two of us
232
00:08:16,092 --> 00:08:18,027
so I could make you a photo blanket
233
00:08:18,094 --> 00:08:19,127
because you were being so sweet to me
234
00:08:19,127 --> 00:08:20,228
during the week of Sue.
235
00:08:20,580 --> 00:08:22,380
You're gonna make me a photo blanket?
236
00:08:22,448 --> 00:08:23,548
I love photo blankets.
237
00:08:23,616 --> 00:08:25,450
Yeah, I know, Darrin. Everybody does.
238
00:08:25,518 --> 00:08:27,819
It's a photo on a blanket.
It is a great idea!
239
00:08:27,887 --> 00:08:28,887
This is weird.
240
00:08:28,955 --> 00:08:30,555
It's like you're saying nice things,
241
00:08:30,623 --> 00:08:32,123
but I get the feeling you're mad.
242
00:08:32,191 --> 00:08:34,025
Yeah, you know, actually, I am mad.
243
00:08:34,093 --> 00:08:36,895
When I went through your phone,
I found a picture of angel
244
00:08:36,963 --> 00:08:39,197
wearing the exact same
necklace you gave me.
245
00:08:39,265 --> 00:08:41,266
Oh. Is that bad?
246
00:08:41,334 --> 00:08:43,401
Well, it's not good!
247
00:08:43,469 --> 00:08:45,337
You told me this was the key to your heart,
248
00:08:45,404 --> 00:08:46,938
and then I find out
249
00:08:47,006 --> 00:08:48,773
you already gave the key to
your heart to somebody else!
250
00:08:48,841 --> 00:08:50,976
You know it's not really
the key to my heart, right?
251
00:08:51,043 --> 00:08:54,246
But it's supposed to be
a symbol of your love.
252
00:08:54,313 --> 00:08:56,081
You know, I was so excited
253
00:08:56,148 --> 00:08:58,884
that my boyfriend got a
special necklace just for me,
254
00:08:58,951 --> 00:09:01,086
and then I find out it's just some thing
255
00:09:01,153 --> 00:09:02,821
you give to anybody you date.
256
00:09:02,889 --> 00:09:05,824
Look, it's only 'cause I'm
really bad at buying presents.
257
00:09:05,892 --> 00:09:08,560
When I got angel the
necklace, she really liked it,
258
00:09:08,628 --> 00:09:10,061
so I thought you would, too.
259
00:09:10,129 --> 00:09:11,963
I mean, my mom really likes hers.
260
00:09:12,031 --> 00:09:13,598
Oh, my God! Your mom, too?!
261
00:09:13,666 --> 00:09:16,501
You know, that's a lot of
keys to your heart, Darrin!
262
00:09:16,569 --> 00:09:19,304
Why even bother locking
it if everybody's got one?!
263
00:09:19,372 --> 00:09:21,473
Sue... no! Just forget it!
264
00:09:21,541 --> 00:09:23,341
Forget it, Darrin! It is over!
265
00:09:23,409 --> 00:09:26,411
Here, take your stupid
necklace back, and your phone!
266
00:09:29,148 --> 00:09:31,616
By the way, your dentist
appointment got changed to 4:00.
267
00:09:39,459 --> 00:09:40,960
When you've been married
as long as we have,
268
00:09:41,027 --> 00:09:43,032
sometimes you gotta splurge,
269
00:09:43,414 --> 00:09:45,265
and without the old dining table in there,
270
00:09:45,265 --> 00:09:47,489
the dining room was
actually quite elegant.
271
00:09:47,769 --> 00:09:49,784
[Vacuum clanking, sputtering]
272
00:09:50,218 --> 00:09:51,885
Hey, Bri. How's the podcast going?
273
00:09:53,250 --> 00:09:54,720
I got to tell you, it's a real grind.
274
00:09:54,720 --> 00:09:57,322
You got to churn out show
after show after show.
275
00:09:57,390 --> 00:09:59,124
Haven't you only done like three?
276
00:09:59,191 --> 00:10:02,227
Yeah. Show after show after show.
277
00:10:03,329 --> 00:10:04,663
What are you doing it for, then?
278
00:10:04,730 --> 00:10:06,031
Well, I do it for the fan.
279
00:10:06,098 --> 00:10:07,699
Without the fan, I'm nothing.
280
00:10:07,767 --> 00:10:09,200
You'd better finish up that vacuuming.
281
00:10:09,268 --> 00:10:10,669
I'm gonna have a hot mic in a minute.
282
00:10:10,736 --> 00:10:12,437
We're talking garamond today.
283
00:10:12,505 --> 00:10:14,573
How am I gonna get fired up for that?
284
00:10:14,640 --> 00:10:15,807
Mm.
285
00:10:17,443 --> 00:10:19,411
- Oh!
- [Both laugh]
286
00:10:19,478 --> 00:10:20,912
Unh!
287
00:10:20,980 --> 00:10:22,380
Oh, this looks sweet!
288
00:10:22,448 --> 00:10:23,515
Check it out...
289
00:10:23,583 --> 00:10:25,517
the table fits perfectly here.
290
00:10:25,981 --> 00:10:27,416
I always wondered what that light was for.
291
00:10:27,604 --> 00:10:29,641
[Chuckles] Hey, and
did you see the car mats
292
00:10:29,641 --> 00:10:30,550
I put in front of the toilet?
293
00:10:30,866 --> 00:10:32,025
Oh, yeah. Those are classy.
294
00:10:32,025 --> 00:10:33,392
And they really soak up the pee.
295
00:10:33,459 --> 00:10:35,560
Did you notice I put the
bathroom door back on its hinges?
296
00:10:35,628 --> 00:10:37,696
I think we'll both appreciate that.
297
00:10:37,764 --> 00:10:40,699
Oh, yeah. We classed the crap
out of this place. [Laughs]
298
00:10:40,767 --> 00:10:43,368
Everybody's gonna want to
be a part of hutch Axl pi.
299
00:10:43,436 --> 00:10:44,536
Oh!
300
00:10:49,008 --> 00:10:50,142
Oh! Oh!
301
00:10:50,209 --> 00:10:51,076
No. Yeah?
302
00:10:51,144 --> 00:10:52,144
Did you do... oh.
303
00:10:52,211 --> 00:10:53,145
We'll work on the handshake.
304
00:10:53,212 --> 00:10:55,013
Hey, mom. Hmm?
305
00:10:55,081 --> 00:10:56,381
Can I ask you something?
306
00:10:56,449 --> 00:10:58,850
I have a lot of coloring to
do before the table gets here.
307
00:10:58,918 --> 00:11:01,253
I-if you grab a pen and
help, you can ask me anything.
308
00:11:01,321 --> 00:11:03,155
Okay. Well...
309
00:11:03,222 --> 00:11:05,257
You know what happened with me and Darrin.
310
00:11:05,325 --> 00:11:06,625
Mm-hmm.
311
00:11:06,693 --> 00:11:10,629
Uh, but I'm thinking I might
have overreacted a little,
312
00:11:10,697 --> 00:11:14,599
so I-I wanted to write him a
poem or a letter or something
313
00:11:14,634 --> 00:11:15,567
to apologize,
314
00:11:15,635 --> 00:11:17,936
but I-I'm feeling kind of stuck.
315
00:11:22,842 --> 00:11:26,545
You and dad have been in
love way longer than me.
316
00:11:26,612 --> 00:11:29,081
How would you describe love?
317
00:11:29,148 --> 00:11:32,122
Oh. Uh...
318
00:11:32,280 --> 00:11:33,981
Well, let's see.
319
00:11:34,049 --> 00:11:35,382
What is love?
320
00:11:35,450 --> 00:11:37,017
Uh, well...
321
00:11:37,085 --> 00:11:38,652
It's like when you're young
322
00:11:38,720 --> 00:11:41,222
and you see a sweater in the store window
323
00:11:41,289 --> 00:11:44,191
and you're so excited and
you just gotta have it.
324
00:11:44,259 --> 00:11:47,294
And you get it and you wear it all the time
325
00:11:47,362 --> 00:11:49,430
and it's so amazing.
326
00:11:49,498 --> 00:11:51,632
But after a while,
327
00:11:51,700 --> 00:11:54,401
the sweater starts to get ratty and smell,
328
00:11:54,469 --> 00:11:55,769
but you still love it.
329
00:11:55,837 --> 00:11:58,639
And people say, "why don't
you get rid of that old thing?"
330
00:11:58,707 --> 00:12:00,574
But you keep on wearing it
331
00:12:00,642 --> 00:12:03,744
'til eventually it starts losing its shape
332
00:12:03,812 --> 00:12:06,013
and it's sagging in places.
333
00:12:06,081 --> 00:12:09,383
But what are you gonna
do? It's your sweater.
334
00:12:12,466 --> 00:12:15,039
Maybe I'll just write
down my favorite lines
335
00:12:15,039 --> 00:12:16,048
from "the fault in our stars"
336
00:12:16,048 --> 00:12:17,482
and I'll put it on his windshield.
337
00:12:18,618 --> 00:12:19,618
Good call.
338
00:12:21,287 --> 00:12:22,554
[Rock music plays]
339
00:12:22,622 --> 00:12:24,089
Hey... Nick!
340
00:12:24,157 --> 00:12:25,624
- Welcome to hutch Axl pi.
- [Chuckles]
341
00:12:25,691 --> 00:12:27,159
Thanks. This place is great. I really...
342
00:12:27,226 --> 00:12:28,827
Yeah, yeah, cool.
So, uh, tell me...
343
00:12:28,895 --> 00:12:30,462
if you were to apply for a car loan,
344
00:12:30,530 --> 00:12:32,931
would the dealership look at
your bank statement and laugh
345
00:12:32,999 --> 00:12:34,432
or smile and hand you some keys?
346
00:12:34,500 --> 00:12:36,034
Oh, uh, I don't know. [Chuckles]
347
00:12:36,102 --> 00:12:38,904
I'm... I'm not really in the
market for a car right now.
348
00:12:38,971 --> 00:12:41,072
Well, I-I actually just
bought a flat-screen TV.
349
00:12:41,140 --> 00:12:42,908
Welcome, brother Nick!
350
00:12:42,975 --> 00:12:45,811
I love the whole "bro/babe"
vibe this place is throwing down.
351
00:12:45,878 --> 00:12:47,145
I want in.
352
00:12:47,213 --> 00:12:49,981
Only prob is, my wallet's
not too fat right now.
353
00:12:50,049 --> 00:12:51,583
So, if you guys could, like,
354
00:12:51,651 --> 00:12:53,285
let me slide on the first payment,
355
00:12:53,352 --> 00:12:56,555
pretty sure I could scrounge
the cash by month two.
356
00:12:56,622 --> 00:12:57,889
I'm gonna go ahead
357
00:12:57,957 --> 00:13:00,091
and put a little "X" on
your name tag for no reason.
358
00:13:00,159 --> 00:13:01,726
[Chuckles]
359
00:13:01,794 --> 00:13:04,563
I may have trouble paying
the first month's rent.
360
00:13:04,630 --> 00:13:06,998
My dad cut me off for partying too much.
361
00:13:07,066 --> 00:13:08,133
Hey, don't you worry.
362
00:13:08,201 --> 00:13:09,701
There's always a bed at hutch Axl pi
363
00:13:09,769 --> 00:13:10,802
for a girl like you.
364
00:13:10,870 --> 00:13:11,636
[Clicks tongue]
365
00:13:17,043 --> 00:13:18,310
Sue.
366
00:13:19,288 --> 00:13:20,315
What are you doing?
367
00:13:20,964 --> 00:13:23,581
_
368
00:13:25,750 --> 00:13:28,596
_
369
00:13:29,668 --> 00:13:33,020
_
370
00:13:33,760 --> 00:13:35,885
_
371
00:13:39,168 --> 00:13:42,819
_
372
00:13:44,344 --> 00:13:46,845
That one was actually from
Jane Seymour's jewelry ad,
373
00:13:46,913 --> 00:13:48,647
but I just thought it was so good.
374
00:13:48,715 --> 00:13:49,648
Sue...
375
00:13:49,716 --> 00:13:51,450
Look, Darrin...
376
00:13:51,518 --> 00:13:53,686
[Door closes] I am so, so sorry.
377
00:13:53,753 --> 00:13:55,587
I was just jealous and crazy,
378
00:13:55,655 --> 00:13:57,289
and I took it out on you.
379
00:13:57,357 --> 00:13:59,825
Pbht. How could something that
started with a photo blanket
380
00:13:59,893 --> 00:14:01,927
spin so far out of control?
381
00:14:03,196 --> 00:14:05,664
Can you please give me the necklace again?
382
00:14:05,732 --> 00:14:08,400
And we can just go back
to the way things were.
383
00:14:08,468 --> 00:14:10,002
Sue, I don't know anymore.
384
00:14:10,070 --> 00:14:11,882
These past couple days have been kind of
385
00:14:11,882 --> 00:14:13,372
an emotional RollerCoaster for me.
386
00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:15,040
And normally I love RollerCoasters,
387
00:14:15,108 --> 00:14:16,742
but you really hurt my feelings,
388
00:14:16,810 --> 00:14:18,577
and then you wouldn't talk to me.
389
00:14:19,946 --> 00:14:21,547
I think I just need some time...
390
00:14:22,949 --> 00:14:24,249
time to figure things out.
391
00:14:25,385 --> 00:14:26,485
I'm sorry.
392
00:14:29,989 --> 00:14:31,290
[Doorknob rattles]
393
00:14:31,358 --> 00:14:32,758
[Clears throat]
394
00:14:32,826 --> 00:14:35,928
Can you please go now so I can
ring the doorbell for my mom?
395
00:14:43,970 --> 00:14:45,170
And remember...
396
00:14:45,238 --> 00:14:47,873
any more than three fonts
in the same document,
397
00:14:47,941 --> 00:14:49,641
and you're just showing off.
398
00:14:49,709 --> 00:14:51,510
Hey, you doing your... shh.
399
00:14:51,578 --> 00:14:55,596
So, in conclusion, it's with a heavy heart
400
00:14:55,852 --> 00:14:58,242
that I announce that this
will be my final FontCast.
401
00:14:59,324 --> 00:15:01,981
When I started on Monday,
I was a different person.
402
00:15:02,833 --> 00:15:05,081
That first show was an incredible high,
403
00:15:05,220 --> 00:15:06,821
the second was a little less so,
404
00:15:06,889 --> 00:15:08,856
and by the third, well...
405
00:15:08,924 --> 00:15:10,592
I was just going through the motions.
406
00:15:10,659 --> 00:15:11,893
I've always said
407
00:15:11,961 --> 00:15:13,895
when I didn't have the
joy anymore, I'd walk away.
408
00:15:13,963 --> 00:15:16,531
It wouldn't be fair to
you, the fan, to keep going.
409
00:15:16,599 --> 00:15:19,334
I just want to thank you for
allowing me into your home
410
00:15:19,401 --> 00:15:21,035
for the better part of a week.
411
00:15:21,103 --> 00:15:23,171
I leave you with this...
412
00:15:23,238 --> 00:15:25,239
your choice of font says more about you
413
00:15:25,307 --> 00:15:26,941
than the words it's written in.
414
00:15:27,009 --> 00:15:30,511
If you're feeling bold, always italicize.
415
00:15:30,579 --> 00:15:34,549
And don't be afraid to
let your freak font fly.
416
00:15:34,617 --> 00:15:38,119
I'm Brick Heck, and it has been my honor.
417
00:15:39,755 --> 00:15:41,656
[Voice breaking] That was a
little harder than I thought it'd be.
418
00:15:41,724 --> 00:15:44,659
Oh, hey, you were on longer
than a lot of font shows.
419
00:15:44,727 --> 00:15:46,928
The important thing to remember is...
420
00:15:46,996 --> 00:15:48,896
- [doorbell rings]
- [Gasps] My table!
421
00:15:51,567 --> 00:15:52,500
Hi.
422
00:15:53,535 --> 00:15:54,602
Okay.
423
00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:57,372
Oh.
424
00:15:57,439 --> 00:15:58,573
What's this?
425
00:15:58,641 --> 00:16:00,008
Huh.
426
00:16:02,211 --> 00:16:04,145
Must be the bolts or something.
427
00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:05,580
[Paper tearing]
428
00:16:13,222 --> 00:16:15,123
[Sighs]
429
00:16:20,468 --> 00:16:22,467
- [Indistinct talking on television]
- Hey.
430
00:16:22,660 --> 00:16:24,281
- [Door closes]
- Where's the new table?
431
00:16:24,687 --> 00:16:26,320
Oh, it's there.
432
00:16:26,388 --> 00:16:28,222
Really? I didn't see it.
433
00:16:28,290 --> 00:16:29,691
Look closer.
434
00:16:29,758 --> 00:16:31,459
[TV shuts off]
435
00:16:31,527 --> 00:16:32,293
The...
436
00:16:34,263 --> 00:16:36,197
It's Dollhouse furniture, Mike.
437
00:16:36,265 --> 00:16:38,132
That's why it was only 50 bucks.
438
00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:40,902
I mean, who on earth pays
50 bucks for doll furniture?
439
00:16:40,969 --> 00:16:42,537
- Apparently, we do.
- [Sighs]
440
00:16:42,604 --> 00:16:44,072
Frankie, how'd this happen?
441
00:16:44,139 --> 00:16:46,274
Hey, you're the one who said, "get it."
442
00:16:46,341 --> 00:16:47,909
Wasn't there a picture?
443
00:16:47,976 --> 00:16:49,243
Yes...
444
00:16:49,311 --> 00:16:52,580
That made it look like a
regular table in a regular room.
445
00:16:52,648 --> 00:16:53,948
I mean, come on,
446
00:16:54,016 --> 00:16:55,550
that is not how you take
a picture of a doll table.
447
00:16:55,617 --> 00:16:57,218
This is how you take a
picture of a doll table.
448
00:16:57,286 --> 00:16:58,753
You take a table. You take a pen.
449
00:16:58,821 --> 00:17:00,254
You put them next to each other.
450
00:17:00,322 --> 00:17:01,656
The person looking at the picture says,
451
00:17:01,724 --> 00:17:03,725
"oh, this table's only as big as a pen.
452
00:17:03,792 --> 00:17:05,626
I can't have Thanksgiving dinner on it."
453
00:17:05,694 --> 00:17:08,193
Well, I hope you kept
the number of this place
454
00:17:08,381 --> 00:17:09,604
'cause I'm getting them
on the phone right now
455
00:17:09,604 --> 00:17:10,816
and they're taking this back.
456
00:17:10,816 --> 00:17:12,383
Oh, you don't think I tried that?
457
00:17:12,451 --> 00:17:13,417
It did not go well.
458
00:17:13,485 --> 00:17:14,919
For people who make tiny furniture
459
00:17:14,987 --> 00:17:16,287
for the pleasure of children,
460
00:17:16,355 --> 00:17:18,389
they're real douche bags.
461
00:17:18,457 --> 00:17:19,624
[Sighs]
462
00:17:19,691 --> 00:17:21,159
Well, guess there's
only one thing we can do.
463
00:17:21,226 --> 00:17:23,528
We got to replace the rest
of our stuff with tiny stuff,
464
00:17:23,595 --> 00:17:25,196
or this table is gonna look ridiculous.
465
00:17:25,264 --> 00:17:26,230
[Laughs]
466
00:17:26,298 --> 00:17:28,833
Oh, Mike, I'm sorry.
467
00:17:28,901 --> 00:17:31,669
I was dumb. I was so dumb!
468
00:17:31,737 --> 00:17:33,604
Eh, it's not your fault. It's both of ours.
469
00:17:33,672 --> 00:17:34,939
We tried to find joy,
470
00:17:35,007 --> 00:17:36,941
and the universe clearly
does not want us to have it.
471
00:17:37,009 --> 00:17:39,243
I just wanted something nice for a change.
472
00:17:39,311 --> 00:17:42,013
I know. Well, someday we'll learn.
473
00:17:42,080 --> 00:17:43,181
How to be happy?
474
00:17:43,248 --> 00:17:44,615
No... to stop trying.
475
00:17:44,683 --> 00:17:46,818
[Chuckles]
476
00:17:46,885 --> 00:17:48,286
[Sighs]
477
00:17:48,353 --> 00:17:51,923
[Rock music plays]
478
00:17:51,990 --> 00:17:53,457
[Laughter]
479
00:17:53,525 --> 00:17:55,159
Oh! Dude!
480
00:17:55,227 --> 00:17:56,761
[Chuckling] Can you believe this?
481
00:17:56,829 --> 00:17:58,830
I know. This is so awesome!
482
00:17:58,897 --> 00:18:00,631
How many people did you give bids to?
483
00:18:00,699 --> 00:18:02,466
Uh, I don't know. I just
started letting everybody in.
484
00:18:02,534 --> 00:18:03,434
Me too!
485
00:18:03,502 --> 00:18:06,037
We're gonna make so much money!
486
00:18:06,104 --> 00:18:07,138
[Both laugh]
487
00:18:07,206 --> 00:18:08,472
[Chanting] Hutch Axl pi!
488
00:18:08,540 --> 00:18:09,707
Hutch Axl pi! Hutch Axl pi!
489
00:18:09,775 --> 00:18:12,310
All: Hutch Axl pi! Hutch Axl pi!
490
00:18:12,377 --> 00:18:13,611
Hutch Axl pi!
491
00:18:13,679 --> 00:18:14,779
- [Wood cracking]
- Hutch Axl pi!
492
00:18:14,847 --> 00:18:16,280
Young woman: Aah! Aah!
493
00:18:16,348 --> 00:18:17,615
[Music stops]
494
00:18:18,417 --> 00:18:19,483
Whoo!
495
00:18:19,551 --> 00:18:20,585
All: [Chanting] Hutch Axl pi!
496
00:18:20,652 --> 00:18:22,220
- [Music resumes]
- Hutch Axl pi!
497
00:18:22,287 --> 00:18:23,554
Hutch Axl pi!
498
00:18:23,622 --> 00:18:24,922
Hutch Axl pi!
499
00:18:24,990 --> 00:18:25,957
Hutch Axl pi!
500
00:18:26,024 --> 00:18:27,725
[Birds chirping]
501
00:18:27,793 --> 00:18:29,861
[Snoring]
502
00:18:34,166 --> 00:18:37,668
Look at this place. Everything's busted.
503
00:18:37,736 --> 00:18:40,504
Oh, man, fratorities are expensive.
504
00:18:40,572 --> 00:18:43,507
Well, better get your checkbook out
505
00:18:43,507 --> 00:18:44,951
'cause we got a lot of stuff to replace.
506
00:18:45,289 --> 00:18:47,199
No. Come on. You know we can't afford that.
507
00:18:47,199 --> 00:18:48,248
We got to figure out something else.
508
00:18:48,685 --> 00:18:51,295
Well, there is one thing we could do.
509
00:18:55,163 --> 00:18:57,423
He's not pink-sweater
girl, but he's quiet,
510
00:18:57,587 --> 00:18:58,492
and he pays his rent on time.
511
00:18:58,695 --> 00:19:00,867
And, you know... he's family.
512
00:19:01,733 --> 00:19:04,258
So, Axl and hutch had found
the man of their dreams,
513
00:19:04,625 --> 00:19:07,445
but, sadly, the balloons
Darrin had left in Sue's room
514
00:19:07,445 --> 00:19:09,407
had lasted longer than their relationship.
515
00:19:09,606 --> 00:19:13,387
"I miss you, and I will not give up on us.
516
00:19:13,613 --> 00:19:16,819
- As Ryan Gosling says in 'the notebook'...
- [door opens]
517
00:19:16,998 --> 00:19:18,675
Darrin: I don't care
what Ryan Gosling says.
518
00:19:18,919 --> 00:19:19,842
Darrin?!
519
00:19:20,096 --> 00:19:21,862
I only care what you have to say, Sue.
520
00:19:22,039 --> 00:19:23,819
[Breathless] What I would
have to say? What I say?
521
00:19:23,819 --> 00:19:26,042
Um, I-I would say that I love you
522
00:19:26,456 --> 00:19:28,258
and I am so, so sorry
523
00:19:28,451 --> 00:19:29,688
and you're the best sweater ever
524
00:19:29,688 --> 00:19:32,122
and... and... ah, I don't
even know what I'm saying!
525
00:19:32,138 --> 00:19:33,148
I just want to hold you!
526
00:19:33,355 --> 00:19:35,092
Me too! Where are you?!
527
00:19:35,622 --> 00:19:36,338
[Balloons popping] Oh, I'm over here!
528
00:19:36,406 --> 00:19:37,572
I don't see you!
529
00:19:37,640 --> 00:19:39,574
Now I'm by the door! Hurry!
530
00:19:39,642 --> 00:19:41,109
Stay there! I'll come find you!
531
00:19:43,112 --> 00:19:46,114
[Balloons popping]
532
00:19:46,182 --> 00:19:46,949
[Gasps]
533
00:19:47,016 --> 00:19:48,784
[Breathing heavily]
534
00:19:52,288 --> 00:19:53,121
I love you, Sue Heck.
535
00:19:53,189 --> 00:19:54,656
I love you, too.
536
00:19:54,724 --> 00:19:57,592
You now have the only key to my heart.
537
00:19:57,660 --> 00:19:59,962
[Crying] Ooh!
538
00:20:00,029 --> 00:20:03,231
My mom cried a little
bit, but... She understood.
539
00:20:03,299 --> 00:20:05,267
[Sighs]
540
00:20:08,504 --> 00:20:11,106
Young love... it's
filled with ups and downs
541
00:20:11,174 --> 00:20:12,674
and rooms full of balloons,
542
00:20:12,742 --> 00:20:14,943
but there's no way any normal couple
543
00:20:15,011 --> 00:20:17,112
can sustain that kind of passion.
544
00:20:17,180 --> 00:20:19,448
- [Door opens]
- But sometimes, on a special occasion,
545
00:20:19,515 --> 00:20:21,850
like your 20-something-th anniversary...
546
00:20:21,918 --> 00:20:23,151
You can still try.
547
00:20:23,219 --> 00:20:24,486
[Chuckling] What's all this?
548
00:20:24,554 --> 00:20:26,421
Happy anniversary.
549
00:20:29,759 --> 00:20:31,593
Wow.
550
00:20:31,661 --> 00:20:34,262
You really went to town here.
551
00:20:34,330 --> 00:20:36,698
Well, you know, I was thinking about it,
552
00:20:36,766 --> 00:20:41,456
and I realized when I sit down to dinner
553
00:20:41,456 --> 00:20:42,866
at a tiny table,
554
00:20:43,260 --> 00:20:45,261
there's no one I'd rather
sit across from and see
555
00:20:45,329 --> 00:20:46,229
than you.
556
00:20:50,367 --> 00:20:51,134
[Gasps]
557
00:20:53,003 --> 00:20:54,904
[Laughs]
558
00:21:02,183 --> 00:21:03,067
[Sighs]
559
00:21:06,138 --> 00:21:07,407
You're out in five, Jimmy.
560
00:21:07,407 --> 00:21:10,186
Give me a minute,
I just lost my favorite podcast.
561
00:21:11,226 --> 00:21:13,998
I went on top too. So classic.
562
00:21:16,168 --> 00:21:17,875
What is that?
Helvetica again?
563
00:21:18,711 --> 00:21:19,739
What a surprise.
564
00:21:20,319 --> 00:21:22,984
Can't throw in Century
Gothic once in a while?
565
00:21:24,490 --> 00:21:25,652
What are we, animals?
566
00:21:25,702 --> 00:21:30,252
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