All language subtitles for Gilmore Girls S02E18 1080p WEB-DL DD+ 2.0 x264-TrollHD_track3_[und]

Mom?
No.

We're starving.
We're waiting for your
Father.

It's gonna get cold.
We're waiting for
Your father.

We've been waiting
Forever.
We have not been
Waiting forever.

Godot was just here, he said,
"I ain't waiting for richard,"

Grabbed a roll, and left.

When we gather as a family,
We eat as a family.

We don't eat in shifts.
You know that.

When did he get that antique
Car?

A couple of horrible
Weeks ago.

What happened to that
Oil-painting hobby?

You know your father,
When he couldn't foresee

Rivaling cezanne, he lost
Interest, so he bought that car.

Lorelai!

Mom, it's not dinner.
It's just my private stash.

It's eating, and we're not
Eating.

You're bound by the rules
Of the geneva convention

Mother, just like everyone else.

No one told me it was
Casual friday.
Hello, everyone.

You haven't started?!

We were waiting.
I thought you're almost done.

I was, but this car
Has its own mind.

As I turned to leave, it began
Spraying green solution at me.

Yuck.
Yuck indeed.
Well, go on, start.

No sense in waiting for me.
Coolness!

Stop!
Gomer said!

In 35 years, I have never, ever
Started a dinner without you

Unless you were out of town
Or seriously ill.

Elsa, take everything away
And keep it warm.

Now please go upstairs
And get ready

So we can all enjoy a nice
Family dinner together.

I'll be right back.

Right back, dad.
Like, right back.

In fact, change on the way
Upstairs.

Make it a navy shower --
Quick soap, quick rinse,

And no
Excessive posing!

Hungry...

* if you're out
On the road *

* feelin' lonely
And so cold *

* all you have to do
Is call my name *

* and I'll be there
On the next train *

* where you lead,
I will follow *

* anywhere that you tell me to *

* if you need
If you need *

* you need me to be with you *

* I will follow *

* oh, oh, oh *

* where you lead,
I will follow *

* any, anywhere
That you tell me to *

* if you need
If you need *

* you need me to be with you *

* I will follow where you lead *

Hey, there.
Anywhere?

Anywhere you want.

Could you move, please?
What?

Anywhere where there's
No people.

Oh, like I'm a mind reader.
I was just joking.

Hmm, that's funny.
What?

Something's different here.
Something's changed.

Impossible.

No, I swear, there's
Something.

I'd be very disappointed if
Something changed in here.

Why are you
So anti-change?

Because most change sucks.
That's true.

[ gasps ]
The chalkboard.
What about it?

"Luke's special omelet" --
That is brand-new.

A new special?

His 4-slice french toast has
Been up there since I was born.

You just gotta let that go,
Baby.

You have a new special.
I sure do.

Nice. What is
The special omelet?

You won't like it.
How do you know?

I know you.
You won't like it.
Can I hear what it is?

It's three eggs
With bacon...
I like bacon.

...Cubed tomatoes, swiss cheese,
And a dash of oregano.

A dash, he says.
Got other customers.

I'm gonna go with the special
Omelet.

With a side of bacon.
Bacon's
In the omelet.

Skip the bacon.
The side?

In the omelet.
Hold the bacon.

Can I get jack cheese
Instead of swiss?

Fine, jack cheese.

Also, I think I'm allergic to
Oregano, so hold that, too.

And some coffee.
So just the eggs, tomatoes,
And jack cheese.

Not too many tomatoes.
Light on the tomatoes.

Just a teeny, tiny amount,
Practically none.

Skipping the tomatoes. It's
An omelet with jack cheese.

Perfect.
You did this on purpose.

Did what?
French toast for me.

That was cruel.
I know.

Look how hard he worked on
That sign and everything.

Look at the handwriting.

It's so precise,
So determined.

It's focused luke.
That's jess' handwriting.

Really?
How do you know jess' writing?

Oh, well, I lent him a book,
And he wrote some stuff in it.

He vandalized one of
Your books?

He didn't vandalize it.

He wrote in the margins,
Thoughts and stuff.

What, like, "Play basketball,
Eat a sandwich"?

No. Stuff.
Like margin stuff.

People like mark twain wrote
In margins.

"Pilot a steamboat,
Write 'huckleberry finn'"?

Forget it.
No, no.

I'm sure margin writing
Is very common.

You didn't tell me dean was
Joining us.

Hey.
Hi.

What are you doing here?

Just dropped by to say
Hello.

How'd you know we
Were here?
'cause you're always here.

We're not always here.

Do you wanna eat with us,
Dean?

Rory?
Is that okay?

Yes. Oh, yes.
You don't have to ask.

Hey, we're three.

I did the math.
You gonna eat something?

Sure, yeah, I'll take the
Special omelet.

You put him up to this?
No, I did not!

You don't know what's in it.
You'll send it back.

No.
Right. I'll come back when I've
Got time for this.

What was that all about?

I think it was something in your
Attitude, mister.

So is everything in the
Materials clear to everyone?

Oh, were we reading these now?

That's why we've all been quiet
For the past 10 minutes.

I thought it was, like,
Prayer time or something.
Good grief.

I'm still reading mine.
What?

I read slow so I don't miss
Anything.
It's not the bhagavad gita.

It's simple instructions
For the business fair.

Someone's not taking to elba
Too kindly.
What does that mean?

Rory's the leader of this group,
Napoleon and you're not.

Excuse me, leader? You wanna
Lead here? You've got anarchy.

I'm just enjoying the show.

Hi, I think this is
My group.

Brad, hey.

Oh, you remember me.

Of course I do.
Cool.

So you're back at
Chilton now.
Oh, yeah.

My psychiatrist convinced my
Parents I should face my fears

Instead of running away from
Them, and my rabbi agreed.

Nice to have you back.
Take a seat.

Paris.

Her name is paris, right?

Brad, there's going to be
An interschool

Business fair in three weeks.

Each group has to come up with
A consumer product.

So we pick our product and we
Make a prototype of it.

Then we use our imaginary
Million-dollar budget

To mass-produce, market, and
Distribute it.

And we'll present all of this
At the fair.

Cool.
Hey, brad.

Your festive interjections are a
Real kick in the pants,

But we're low on time,
So can it.

In two days, we're going to
Reconvene and pitch ideas.

Ah, class dismissed?

Well, well, we haven't even
Discussed business advisors.

Right, we're supposed to get
A parent who's in business

To advise us.

My dad's got scheduling
Conflicts up the wazoo.

My dad's in hong kong, but he
Can video-conference in.

No for paris.
My dad's traveling.

My dad's in court for the next
Six weeks.

Lawyer? Defendant.

I have no idea what he's up on
Anyway.

No one's mom works?

Working moms are so '90s.

My mom works.

She's a curator at the hartford
Natural museum.

We need experienced business
Advisors, brad,

Not someone who poses animal
Carcasses.

What about your mom?
My mom?

Yeah, that's right,
She runs a hotel.

It's just an inn.
A small inn.

It's still a business.
She must keep books.

Yeah, but they're really
Small books.

Look. It's not perfect,

But a better option than brad's
Mom, the buffalo stuffer.

She doesn't stuff the animals.
That's taxidermy.

Who is this rabbi that
Encouraged you to come back?

Give me his address.
I'm gonna go pop him one.

Hold it, I don't think my mom is
Right for this.

You need to do everything
To make it happen.

Otherwise, maybe you shouldn't
Be the group leader.

A coup d'etat.
How exciting.

There's no coup d'etat.
I'll ask her.

Good.

30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35.
Sookie, look.

Can't look.
Making meringue.

37 -- fine science.
You got a package.

39 -- gotta count.
40 -- can't overwhip.

I think it's your wedding
Invitations.

Whoo-hooo!
Gimme!

Oh, I gotta see 'em!
Oh, you're gonna love these.

They're pearly white with this
Beautiful lavender str--

I'm gonna choke somebody by
The neck

Until brains ooze out of
Their ears.

What?
They're beautiful.

The name!
Look at the name!

"The marriage of his daughter
Susie st. James."

Who's susie st. James?

I think it's you.
It can be changed.

These have to go out
In a week!

We're calling right now.

I am so not a susie!

Good morning.
Beautiful morning.

It sucks from where I'm
Sitting.

Lorelai, you remember I have
Tomorrow afternoon off.

I remember.
Big plans?

Yes, my mother is coming
To visit.

Hello, yes.
Customer service, please.

Thanks.
Sorry.

About what?
Your mother's coming.

But I'm excited.
I never get to see her.

Oh, I must be projecting.
Your mother's coming?

She's coming down for
Three days.

She staying here?
No, she stays with me,
Of course.

In your tiny place?
Oh, she's fine with it.

We stay up all night gabbing and
Watching movies.

We have a ball.
Wow, I can't
Wait to meet her.

Oh, hello, yes.

We have a problem with some
Wedding invitations we ordered.

Okay, they're
Transferring me.

I heard that.

He's really happy about his
Mother coming to visit.

I heard that, too.

Totally foreign to me.
Hi, oh, great.

I'm gonna pass you over
To my friend

Who has a problem with some
Merchandise she ordered.

Hold on one sec.
Listen to me.

I've a lot of experience
Dealing with people

Who screwed something up.

You've a better chance of
Getting help

If you don't get
All hysterical.

Okay.
Okay.

How dare you do
This to me?!

You're ruining my wedding!

It's the most important day
Of my life!

My life, not susie st. James!
Are you listening to me?!

Good girl.
You'd better be listening!
No, you be quiet and listen!

Hey.
Oh, hi.

Thought you couldn't get here
Till later.

Meeting didn't go as long as
I thought.

Well, lucky for me, more work
For you.

Here -- chronological order.
So how was your day?

I got an "A"
On my physics test,

And I convinced a boy that paris
Would never attack his rabbi.

So uneventful, huh?
Pretty much.

Mom, I know you 're probably not
Gonna wanna do this.

Yes, I will, unless it's
Something I don't wanna do.

Do you wanna be the parent
Advisor on my economics project?

Oh, rory, gosh.

I'm kind of in a spot.

No one else can do it?
Nope.

You double-checked?
Yes.

No one else can do it, so
You came slumming after me?

Of course.
I appreciate that.

I'm totally stuck.

Well, if you're stuck,
I'll do it.
Thanks.

What about your grandfather,
Retired business titan?

What about him?
He'd be perfect.

But this is a business project,

And the word "Business" has been
Kind of taboo in that house.

Asking him might remind him of
That and upset him.

Or he'll be thrilled that you
Thought of him.

You're not saying that
Because you don't wanna do it?

No, I really think he'd
Enjoy helping you.

You'd be doing me a favor.
I won't have to feel guilty

About being so reluctant to help
You out.

Alright,
I'll give it a shot.

Good girl.

Would you really have felt
Guilty?

No. But I'd have felt guilty
About not feeling guilty,

You could see how that could
Go on forever.

Miss gilmore in the
Vicious circle.
Mmm-hmm.

[ classical music playing ]

Hey, grandpa.

Rory, this is a surprise.

Was in the area,
Thought I'd pay a call.

Well, how very continental
Of you.

I would hug you but I've various
Forms of fluid on my clothing.

I'll take a rain check.
How's she running?

Ah, she's a bit, oh,
Obstinate today.

Girls can get that way.

Indeed.

So, you were in the
Neighborhood.

Yeah, and I actually have a
Little favor to ask you.

Oh, ask away.
Okay.

There's this project at
School,

And it's for
My economics class.

Good subject.
Pragmatic.

Yeah, and we have to come up
With a consumer product,

All make-believe, and there's
Sort of a contest at the end,

And we sort of need
An advisor.

An advisor.
Yeah.

Someone who's experienced
In business

Who can come to a few meetings,
Make suggestions.

I totally understand if you
Can't do it,

But I just thought
I would ask.

Well, I'm not sure how much
Help I could be.

I've never actually created a
Consumer product.

That's okay.
We kids haven't either.

Yes,
I suppose you haven't.

If you can't or
Don't wanna do it,

I totally understand.

Well, things are a little bit
Hectic right now.

Oh, yeah, I know.

And it is short notice,
After all.

Very short.
Very short.

You know what?
Forget I even asked.

Rory!
I didn't know you were here!

Hi, grandma.
You didn't hug your
Grandfather, did you?

I took a rain check.
Well, I better go.

You just got here. We have
Cookies. Would you like cookies?

No, thank you.
Mom's expecting me at the inn.

And grandpa, really, don't worry
About it. Just thought I'd ask.

I'm fine, rory.
Thank you for asking.

Bye.

Ask what?
What did she ask?

Something for her economics
Class. It's nothing, really.

That doesn't sound like nothing.
Is she having trouble?

No, emily, she merely asked me
To participate

In some project at school, and I
Respectfully declined.

You declined?
Why would you decline?

Let's talk about it later,
Emily. I'm busy.

Busy? You've been poking
Around that stupid engine

For three weeks, and all
It does is spray at you.

You're not too busy.
Emily, I'm in the middle
Of something here.

I don't expect you to
Understand it.

You're not gonna help her?
Can we talk about this
Later?

Well, I never thought I'd
See the day,

The day richard gilmore

Would disappoint his
Granddaughter like this.

Oh, emily, please.

Is this how it's gonna be
From now on?

What are you talking about?

I just wanna know what to
Expect from you

Because the bouncing from one
Thing to another, the moping,

All of that I accepted,

But your turning your back
On rory...

I did not turn my back
On her.

You adore that little girl.
She means everything to you.

Emily.
Are you that lost?

[ music volume increases ]

I'm incredibly disappointed
In you, richard!

Sales. Sales.
Lane. It's just
A stupid test.

"Lane kim, you have shown a
Genuine aptitude for sales."

It doesn't mean anything.
"Hello, ma'am.

"You're eyeing the new
Whip-o-matic.

"This baby's right off the
Truck.

"If you're looking to
Fulfill your whipping needs,

"You're at the right place,
As devo says,

"If a problem comes,
You must whip it,

As long as you whip it with
Whip-o-matic."

Wow, you are good.
I'll take two.

I don't wanna be in sales.
I wanna do something cool.

Sell refrigerators.
You're not funny.

You are taking this aptitude
Test way too seriously.

It's the fourth time it's come
Up "Sales."

In 10 years, we'll be having
Lunch in paris,

We'll not be discussing
If you made your quota.

Great. I'm gonna be a sucky
Salesman?!

Hey.

Oh, hey.
Hi, lane.

Only as good
As my last sale.
She's lost her mind.

Got it.
So what are you doing?

We're going to buy some
Shoes.

And pick up a job
Application.

You will now face the wall.

After that, come by my
Softball game.

You haven't been to a game
In a while.

You said you missed
Seeing them.

I do, but I thought we were
Getting together tonight.

We are.
Then I should get my philosophy
Homework done.

Do it at the game.
My homework?

Doesn't that defeat the point of
Going to see you play?

You can't glance up in between
Nihilistic theories?

I can but
What's the point?
What?

Why don't I do my homework
At home,

And I will go see you play
Next week?

Well, I...
I promise I'll be there.

Okay, sure.
Great.

So tonight?
I'll be by at 7:00.

Okay, do that pointing to the
Outfield thing.

That's always very popular.

I will.

Bye, lane.
Come again soon.

[ chuckles ]

[ sighs ]

Here and here.
What?

Cleaning supplier.
There.

Here.
That's the --

Staff insurance forms.

Initial here.
Date it here.
And I just --

You just okayed the vaccination
Of all those filthy ducks

In the south pond.

Oh, very nice.
Yes,
A regular dr. Doolittle.

[ gasps ]
French accent: michel!

Gilly.

Oh, mon dieu!
You are gorgeous!

Come! Come!

[ both speak french ]

What are you doing here?

Was gonna pick you up at the
Airport, you wicked creature.

I had to come early. I wanted to
Buy presents before I see you

Since I know you are a
Materialistic vulture.

Alright, back up.

Da da da. Thank god,
I have the perfect son.

If you'd been ugly,
I don't know what I'd have done.

Boarding school?
In switzerland.

Come. Lorelai, this is my
Mother, giselle.

It's very nice to meet you.

Oh, my god, those eyes!
Are they real?

Yes, they are.

God is terribly cruel

To bestow those eyes and that
Face to one person.

I'm sorry, can you be
My mom, too?

I'm gonna show her around,
Okay?

Make sure you see sookie.
Sookie wants to meet your mom.

Yes, michel,
I must meet your friends.

I didn't raise you
To be rude.

You did too.
I didn't.

Come, show me off.

Have you been using those free
Weights I sent you?

Yes, they hold down my papers
Beautifully.

Lazy, silly woman.

Cruel and vicious boy.

I really appreciate you doing
This, grandpa.

I know you weren't really
Thrilled with the idea.

No,
That's not true.

I told everybody to have their
Idea pitches prepared

So we can get you in and out as
Quickly as possible.

This is an assignment. We will
Give it the time it requires.

However, efficient is
Always best.

I totally understand.

Hey.

Everyone, this is my
Grandfather, richard gilmore.

This is louise, madeline, paris,
Brad, and chip.

Nice to meet you all.

Do you wanna say a few
Words before we start?

No, I'm just here to
Advise.

I'll sit back here and observe
And advise if necessary.

Okay.

We can start with the idea
Pitches.

Who wants to go first?
I will.

Okay, louis
Has the floor.

I couldn't find my new lip
Gloss this morning.

I just bought it. It's the
Perfect shade of pink,

Plus it has this major shine
With minor stickiness,

Meaning no fear of your hair
Attaching itself to your face.

A coup.
I know.

So of course, 15 minutes later,
Tardy and glossless,

I left the house, and I had to
Rely on madeline

For my source of lip color
For the day.

Not an ideal solution.

Major skin-tone mismatch.

I'm sorry, group leader,
Could you ask the pigeon sisters

If there is a point to
This opus?

Louise, what's your idea?

A lipstick lojack.

Excuse me?
A lipstick-tracking device.

Attach it to a tube,
Hook it up to a remote,

Next time you're searching,
You just point and shoot.

I'd buy one.
Okay.

Um, louise, that's a very
Interesting idea,

But I think we should think of
Something

That appeals to both boys
And girls. Anyone else?

Okay, I've got one.
A locker robot.

It would talk and tell you
Facts,

Help you with your homework,
Carry your stuff,

And you could fit it
In your locker

Until you're ready
To go home.

Okay, but that means

That we would actually have to
Build a robot.

Yes, we would.

Who knows how to do that?
I don't know.

He looks like
He should know.

I've never built a robot.

But you've tried,
Haven't you?

Yes, I have.
Okay.

Let's just try to keep the
Ideas down to things

That we can actually
Accomplish.

And I guess paris is next.

The average teenager spends
Seven hours a day at school,

Seven hours where he or she is
Busy walking from class to class

Indoors, outdoors, in all
Types of weather.

At the same time, that same
Teenager

Is going through major
Physical changes

Within his or her own body.

The combo of the action with the
Environment

In addition to the hormonal
Imbalance

Can only lead to one thing --
Accidents.

What are you talking about?

Monday morning, muffin wakes up
And looks in the mirror.

"Oh, no, I have a zit on
My face.

"I'll look down
When I walk

So hunky football player won't
Notice," and bam,

Muffin smacks right into the
Cafeteria wall.

Ouch, that's gotta hurt.
Who's muffin?

This is why I'm proposing
Manufacturing something

That no teenager should be
Without -- a first-aid kit.

A first-aid kit?

Specially designed to fit
In a locker

With minimum space disruption --
Band-aids, antiseptic,

Cotton balls, q-tips, ace
Bandages, aspirin.

I don't know.
It's possible.

Does anyone have any
Questions about it?

They sell these things in every
Drug store, do they not?

Yes, they do.
There's also a registered
Nurse on every campus.

Her office would contain

The products that you're
Talking about, correct?

What makes you think you could
Get a young person

To spend good money on something
That they could get for free

Or, at least,
At a lower cost?

Because I know one thing
About the modern teenager.
And what is that?

You can make them buy anything
If it comes in leopard print.

True.
Very true.

We get them with style.

We dress up the kits with
Sparkles, colors,

Pictures of bands,
Sport themes for the boys,

Animal pictures for the puppy
And unicorn bunch,

Chess boards for the
Bobby fischer freaks --

A style for every taste.

Plus we use neon band-aids, pink
Or blue gauze for the bandages,

Anything that seems young or
Flashy or bright.

And that is how you intend

To set the business world
On its ear?

That's right.
Tricked-out first-aid kits.

For the locker.
And you really think
That's going to work?

Yes. I do.

So do I.

Really?
It's perfect.

It's simple, it's easy to
Produce.

The possibilities are endless.
I love it.

Well, I think we've got our
Product.

We need to go through this
Point by point.

Okay, let's do it.

Now, the secret to a great
Campaign is a great idea.

Now, we've got that.
Let's move on to finances.

Do any of you have
Dinner plans?

Because we're gonna be here for
A while. All turn to page four.

Here we go!

Now, january
Projections are...

[ telephone ringing ]

Aagh!
Hey.

Haagh.

Mom?

Hello?

That ringing is not in your
Head, you know?

Oh. Y-you've got to read this
Motley crue book.

I swear, you get to the point
Where ozzy osbourne

Snorts a row of ants, you think,
"It cannot get any grosser,"

And then you turn the page,
And, "Oh, hello. Yes, it can."

It's excellent!
Why didn't you
Answer the phone?

Because I firmly believe

That once you've experienced
Something 5,000 times,

You need to move on.
What?

I knew who it was.
Who?

The same person who's called so
Many times that I heard it sigh.

Dean?
Dean the determined.

Oh, man.
[ telephone rings ]

Five bucks says
I know who that is.

Hello.
Rory.
It's your grandfather.

Oh, hey, grandpa.

He did that on purpose.

I'd like to discuss
Tomorrow's meeting.
Okay.

I was thinking
That we should relocate.

Midtown?
Here.

Your house?

It'll be more comfortable,
With infinitely better snacks.

Yeah, that sounds great.
Wonderful.

I'll call the group.
Okay.

Then I guess
I'll see you tomorrow.

Tomorrow.
Bye.

What did he want?

To move the meeting
To his house tomorrow

And to cost you
Five bucks.

That's going well,
Grandpa doing that thing

With you at school?

Yeah, I think he's having fun
With it.

See? Did your brilliant mother
Call it or what?
Yes, she did.

You're damn lucky to have that
Woman in your life.

It's whispered in my ear
Every night.

You won't let me write it
In your underwear anymore.

Hey, check the machine
So I can erase the messages.

Aagh.

[ beeps ]
Dean: hey, it's me.It's 4:00.
Call me when you get home.

[ beeps ]
Hey, it's 4:30. I'm home.
Call me.

[ beeps ]
Quarter to 5:00. Where are you?
I'll try paging you.

[ beeps ]
5:30. Did you get my page?
Call with the answer. Bye.

They're not all
From him.

[ beeps ]
Forgot you were
Getting home at 6:00.

And oddly, after remembering
That information...

[ beeps ]
It's 5:45. Just thought I'd see
If you got home early.

That boy would make
A good drinking game.

This is crazy.
Ten messages?

Plus the four I took before
I stopped answering the phone.

Right.

Ease up on that love potion
You're giving him

Or he's gonna start showing up
At david letterman's house.

Hmm...
What's the matter?

14 messages.

Yeah, so,
It's a little --
Too much.

You guys fighting
Or something?
What are you talking about?

Did something happen to set off
The phone craze?

No, everything's fine.
Everything's calm.

No more incidents.
I don't get it.

If I had to guess, I'd say
He's feeling insecure.

But why?
Rory.

But I spend every free moment
With him.

I call him, I page him...

You've been good.
...And nothing seems
To be enough.

Nothing seems to make things
Normal again.

Give it some time.

Just want things to be
The way they were.

Relationships are hard.

Sometimes you go through
A weird patch

And things get funky
For a little while.

But just give it a chance.
Ride it out.

Things will
Calm down again.

I hope so.
I'm gonna erase the messages.

[ people laughing ]

Oh, stop that!
Stop making me laugh!

You're trying to kill me!

You're trying to make me
Laugh to death

So you can get away with
A grisly crime.

Your mind is evil.
Your soul is empty.

Do you want some coffee?
Yes, darling. Thank you.

I'll be
Right back.

Hello, blue eyes.

Hi, giselle.
How was lunch?

Oh, champagne, caviar.
The usual.
Ah, sure.

Then came mounds of pasta with
Terrible things in it.

It was [smooches]
Perfect.

You seem to be having
A wonderful time.

I am. I'll miss him
So much when I go home.

But thank goodness, he will have
An extra five pounds

To remember me by after
Eating all my pasta today,

That dirty, thieving boy.

Michel ate pasta?
Oh, yes.

Michel loves pasta.
He eats it all the time.

Not around us.

Here it's all no-carb,
Low-cal,

Can I eat less
Than the lab rats do?

Lab rats?
Better not explained.

Anyway, I'm glad you got him
Eating pasta.

He seems really happy.

Coffee, coffee,
Coffee.

Ohh! Mmm!

Mmm, this is horrible.

You will drink it
And like it.

You are a curse.
Let's go shop.

Let's go buy something
Completely useless

And pay way too much money
For it.

I love it!

Au revoir!
Au revoir.

That is so wrong.

We should have waited
For paris.

She's threw a fit about
Leaving no later than 3:10.

She could be standing outside
The school right now, waiting.

She has my cell number.

I thought you lost
Your phone.
I did...Oh.

We'll call
When we get inside.

[ doorbell rings ]
Tell her I wanted to wait,
Okay?

Paris.
Hey.

You're right on time.
Come on in.

Um...O-okay.

Richard: in the dining room,
Everyone.

Wow.

Welcome, everyone, to the first
Official board meeting

Of the style aid corporation.

Will everyone please
Take a seat?

I feel like ivan boesky.

Rory,
You are group leader,

Which translates into
Chairman of the board,

Which means you sit
At the head of the table.

But that's where you sit.
Not today.
Come on.

At this point, I'd like to
Turn the meeting over to paris

Who will bring us up to date on
Our latest development. Paris.

Thank you, richard.

I'm glad
To see you all here today

At the beginning of what I think
Is going to be

A very exciting experiment.

Does she have the baseball
Bat in her hands?

Everyone to turn to
Page one

In your
Presentation booklets.

Hey...We haven't gotten to
The pencil part yet.

Oh. Sorry.

Ladies and gentlemen,
I give you...

The rx 2002.

Nice.
Very nice.

Listed in front of you are all
The contents

Contained in the rx 2002,

Plus the additional
Style options, 12 in all.

Every one of them waterproof,
Fireproof,

And comes with
A five-year warranty.

Which is longer than most of
Your high school careers.

He is funny!

Now, there's also a deluxe model
With extra features designed to

Personalize your kit even more
Specifically for your needs.

There will be
A snap-in c.D. Case

Which can hold up to
Ten c.D.S.

There's a lighted
Vanity mirror

And a divided compartment for
Makeup and knickknacks,

A picture frame, and a hidden
Minivault for valuables,

Which can be locked
For safety.

Terrific idea, richard.
Really. Top-notch.

Thank you, paris.
This is really amazing.
I want one of these.

Exactly the point.

Now let's check in with our
Marketing department.

Madeline, louise,
What have you got for us?

Okay, well, first, we go
For the obvious. Magazines.

You know, teen,
Young miss, seventeen...

Spin and rolling stone,
Especially to hit the guys.

I hear that jane magazine also
Has a young, hip following.

How do you know about
Jane magazine?

I have my ways, young lady.

We should check into placing
Them in mall stores.

Think we should go straight
To the source.

The schools?
Why not?

School bulletin-boards.
Websites.

You can set up tables at
Football games and pep rallies.

Well, how is everyone
Doing here?

Just fine, emily.

Good.
Is there enough food?

Yes,
There is plenty of food.

What about ice cream?
Would anyone like some ice --

Emily, we're in the middle of
A business meeting.

Oh! I -- well,
I'm very sorry.

Go back to your
Business meeting.

Now I think
Your projection for...

He's smiling.
I know!

He's smiling, and there's
No oil on the carpet.

Life is good.
Yes, it is.

Emily...Please.

I'm going,
I'm going.

Richard, do you have
The third year projections?

Well, yes, paris,
I do.

I have them right here.

[ instrumental music ]

Dean.
Hey.

Hey, how's it going?

Uh, just washing
Rory's car.

I can see that.

I came by to see her
And she wasn't here

I was just gonna wait on
The porch but I noticed

Her car looked dirty,
Thought I'd wash it.

'cause sometimes things can get
On your car. Like dirt, sap.

Can get into your paint.
Really hard to get off.

Even water spots. After it rains
They can be a real problem.

Okay.
Would you like a soda?

No, I'm fine.
Let's get a soda.

Put the squirting-water thing
Down and come in the kitchen.

Squirting thing down.
That's it. Come on.

I really didn't mean to
Bother you.

I can wait outside until
Rory gets home.

Honey, rory's working on her
School project today.

[ sighs ]
Oh, yeah.
I guess I forgot.

I mean, she must have
Told me that she --

I'm sorry. I forgot.

That's okay.

So I'll just go.
No, no. Come here.

Sit down for a sec, okay?

Are you alright?

Yeah, fine, I just don't
Remember rory telling me

About her studying today.

I swear I wouldn't have
Come over.

Can I maybe give you
A little advice?

Sure.
Okay.

First, I just wanna tell you
I think you are a great guy.

You're so good to rory.

Though I hoped she'd
Be the one girl in the world

Who wouldn't look at a boy
Till 38,

I'm really glad
She found you.
Thanks.

I know things have been a little
Off between you two lately.

Did she say that?
No. I'm saying that.

I can see it.
And by the way, I get it.

Sometimes when things
Are out of whack

It freaks us out a little

And makes us feel like
We're losing something

That's really important,
And that scares us even more,

We try really hard
To hold onto

Whatever it is we think
We're losing

And sometimes we hold on
A little too hard.

Too hard?

Like "Calling ten times in a
Three-hour period" too hard.

14 times.
Okay, see.

Was gonna let you slide but,
Hey, an honest man, I like that.

I'm holding on
Too hard?

I don't think you mean to.
You think I'm losing her?

I think you think
You are.

I just feel like nothing
I do is...

I just want things
Back the way they used to be.

I know you do.
And they can be.

How?
I know it sounds crazy...

But sometimes giving people
A little bit of space

Is actually
The best thing to do.

Space?
Just a little.

Like what?
Don't call her? Don't see her?

No. Just let her breathe.
Let her relax.

Let her come to you
For a change.

You're not telling me this to
Get rid of me?

If I was trying to, I'd have
Started this conversation with,

"Let me tell
You about my family..."

I'm not telling this to get rid
Of you but because I think

It might help things
Between you guys.

Just try it.

If it doesn't work, I promise,
You can wash my car, too.

Okay.
Do you want a soda?

No thanks.
I'm gonna go.

Uh, don't tell rory
I was here, okay?

I'm just sitting here at the
Table, talking to myself. Again.

Thanks.

Bye, dean.

[ door closes ]

You know what? Forget it! If
That's how you run business,

I deserve this for picking you
In the first place! I hate you!

Hey...
Okay...

New plan
For the invites.

We're getting married
May 15th,

4:00, front lawn --
Pass it on.

Sookie...
That's it.
Word of mouth.

They used it for
The revolutionary war.

Who the hell am I to
Poo-poo history, I ask you?

What the hell is wrong
With you?

With me?
Yes, you!

What are you talking about?

Why would you tell my mother
That I do not eat carbs?!

Because you don't.
That is private information.

Private about me.
Everybody in stars hollow
Knows you don't eat carbs.

So what?!
Calm down.
Have some toast.

Do not talk to my mother again.
Do you understand?

No, I don't understand.

You guys seem
Crazy about each other.

I assumed, since you gave up
Carbs a year ago, she knew.

You know what happens
When you assume.

What?
I don't know!
Something about a donkey!

It's a stupid
American phrase!

You and your mother seem to have
The perfect relationship.

Yes.
Because I tell her nothing!

We keep all subjects
Light and fluffy.

We talk about
Clothes and food

And posh spice and david beckham
And that is all.

Nothing of value.
Nothing of substance.
I'm sorry.

Now she knows I've been hiding
Something from her.

Suddenly
She's asking questions.

"Why did I leave at 18?
Where do I go at night?

"Who are my friends? What
They do? Where they live?

Why I've chosen this career?"

On and on and on!
It never ends! I can't stand it!

She's a complete pain!
She won't stop!

I took a six-hour bath
Last night

Just to escape
The incessant nagging.

You did this to me!

You turned my giselle into a
Mother, and I hate you for it!

I hate you very, very much!

So...

Feel better now?

Yeah, I do.
Thanks.
Mm-hmm.

Okay, I've swept the room,
And I have to tell you --

All sad.
I think we're a lock.

Actually thought the
Locker alarm was pretty good.

No one looks
When a car alarm goes off.

How effective is a
Locker alarm going to be?

Nope. I feel it.
We are it.

What's the word?

Every single idea in this room
Is completely worthless.

Yes!
There's a lot of wasted
Cardboard in here.

We're going to win!
Yes, we're!

Two of you need to
Take a timeout.

Richard?
Richard, hello.

Hanlin, good to see you.

What are you doing here?

Well, I'm actually advising rory
On her business project.

The rx 2002.

Oh, well, that's wonderful.
You look great.

I feel great.
We don't see you
At the club much.

No, I've been
Very busy lately.

Did I hear correctly?
Did you retire?

Right before christmas.
So it's true.

Biddy and I couldn't
Believe it when we heard.

Well, a man can't work forever.

No, that's true. I just can't
Picture you retired.

It's been wonderful lately.
Best move I've ever made.

It's given me time to do
Wonderful things.

That does sound nice.
What kinds of things?

Well, this.

Well...There you go.

Unfortunately, some of us aren't
Living the good life quite yet.

I've got to get back.
It's been wonderful seeing you.

Let's have dinner soon.
I would like that very much.

I'll have biddy
Give 'em a call.

You do that.

Did you see the hose-hook
Idea over at table five?

A hook on your belt
For your garden hose.

There's a buster keaton routine
Waiting to happen.

So, how are we doing?

Paris is practicing spiking the
Football and doing a backflip.

Excuse me,
Ladies and gentlemen...

All the projects
Have now been reviewed.

Here we go.
Before we announce
The winner,

I must commend everyone for
Their fine work.

There are many, many good ideas
Here today.

It makes me proud.

Move it along, padre.

Now I'd like to announce
The winner...

Table ten. Miss chester's class
With the locker alarm.

I don't understand.
How's that possible?

That alarm doesn't even work.
I was just over there.

This is the most ludicrous
Thing!

Grandpa,
It doesn't matter.
It certainly does.

You've put in an extraordinary
Amount of time

And effort and thought
Into this.

It deserved to win!
Yeah!

I wanted to win too,
But we didn't.

I'm gonna talk to
The headmaster.

I wish you wouldn't.
You were robbed, rory,

And I'm not gonna sit back
And simply watch it happen.

Hanlin...Good.
I want a word with you.

Is something wrong?

This contest
Is a disgrace!

I beg your pardon?

I've been in the business world
For 35 years,

And in those 35 years

I've seen ideas come
And I've seen ideas go

And I've learned
A few things

About what flies
And what doesn't.
I'm sure you have.

I am telling you that out there,
In the real world,

There is no way
That a locker alarm

That doesn't even
Work properly

Would be a viable
Business investment.

We're not in the real world.
We are in a school.

A school that should be training
Children for the real world.

Calm down.
I demand a recount!

Very well.

I just recounted.
The alarm still wins.

Hanlin --
Your project was very good.

It was definitely in the
Running. You should be proud.

This is not my project!

This is their project.
The children's project.

Really?
Yes!

This has nothing to do with me!
It's for the children!

But they're not the ones whose
Causing the public scene.

You are.

It was awful.
He looked so upset.

His face was turning red
And he was practically shaking.

Did you notice when
He gets mad he gets taller?

I don't know how
But he actually grows!

The day I told him I was
Pregnant -- 24 feet tall.

Hey, I'm upset here.
Honey, you did nothing.

You went to your grandfather
Who you greatly admire,

And actually like hanging out
With, to ask for his help.

That's lovely
And thoughtful.

[ doorbell rings ]
Help me out tonight.

No mention of work or chilton
Or school or retirement.

Nothing but politics
And religion. Got it.

Hello, girls.

Hi, mom.
Hi, grandma.

Come in, come in.

Dinner's almost ready.

Richard, the girls are here.
Richard?

[ sighs ] He came home today,
Didn't say a word,

Stomped off to his study,
Slammed the door.

And he's been holed up in there
Ever since.

Can't even get him
To answer me.

You sure
He's still in?

Of course.
The door's right there.

I'd have seen
If he came out.
Sorry.

Not everyone leaves this house
By climbing out the window.

Maybe someone
Should talk to him.

I don't know.
What on earth happened today?

Things didn't go well
At the business fair.
What happened?

10th graders staged a hostile
Takeover of the 11th graders!

Our project didn't win,
Grandpa took it badly.

Well, I'm at my wit's end.

If that man's gonna to fall
Apart over a school project...

It's a weird time
For him.
I feel awful.

Maybe he should go
Talk to somebody.

Like whom?
Like a psychiatrist.

What?
Maybe it would help.

We do not go
To psychiatrists.

Mom, there's nothing wrong
With getting help.

Lorelai gilmore, are you
Seriously suggesting

That your father go to
A complete stranger

And talk about
His personal life?

Lots of people
Swear by it.

Yes. Disturbed people.
Deviants.

People with multiple
Personalities who see things

And hear dogs
Talking to them

And roam the streets
Talking to themselves

And licking parking meters.
Mom.

Next thing you'll be suggesting
I go to a psychiatrist.

Hmm...Too many comebacks.
I cannot pick.

[ door opens ]
Richard? Is that you?

Of course, it's me.

Oh, rory, you're here.
Wonderful!

Hello, lorelai.
Hey.

Well, I am starving.
What's for dinner?

"What's for dinner?"

What do you mean,
"What's for dinner?"

I thought the question
Was relatively clear,

But I'd be glad to
Rephrase it for you.

Uh, what sort of food products

Will appear on various plates
This evening?

Richard, you come home in a huff

Then you lock yourself in that
Study all afternoon...

Well, I had a lot of
Thinking to do.

A lot of thinking. I owe
That to you, young lady.

I'm sorry.
You should certainly
Not be sorry.

Richard, what -- put that roll
Down and explain yourself!

This whole week,
This whole experience with rory

And the locker first-aid kit --

That is a damn good idea,
By the way,

No matter what those yarnheads
At that school of yours say --

Anyway, this whole week made me
Realize something.

I don't want to be retired.
You what?!

I don't like it. I hate it,
As a matter of fact.

But dad...
It's boring.

I have absolutely no idea
What to do with myself.

And frankly, I am tired of
Trying to find something

To fill up my time.

What're you going to do?
I'm going to work.

Are you asking for
Your job back?

Oh, god, no.
No, no, no, no, no.

I have decided to go into
Business for myself.

Wow.
What?

Cool.
It is cool, isn't it?

What are you gonna do?
I'm not sure yet.

Perhaps I'll consult,
Maybe take on a partner.

Maybe I'll even teach.
What?

You don't have to
Say it like that.
Sorry.

[ cheerfully ]
What?

I think 35 years of experience
Will qualify me

To teach a course or two at that
Local business college of yours.

Oh, my god. It's "Who's the
Boss? The later years."

Richard, are you serious
About this?

As a heart attack.
But...

I haven't felt this good in a
Very long time, emily.

I have "The buzz."

And I owe it all to you.
Glad to be of service.

He's going to teach.

Or consult.
Or consult.

So, licking a parking meter
Is just around the corner.

Okay, that dinner
Was good.

All of grandma's dinners
Are good.

But this one
Had the rolls.

Oh, those were
Excellent rolls.
Weren't they?

Hot and buttery with that
Split-top thing going on.

I miss the rolls.

She can make more
Next week.

That's okay.
I got four in my purse.
You do not.

Go ahead and check.

Have you no shame?
Ha!

[ pager beeps ]
Oh, who's that?

It's dean.
Really?

How many pages
Does that make for today?

Just one.
You're kidding.

In two days.
Wow.

I know.

He hasn't called or mysteriously
Appeared by my side or anything.

Hmm, maybe he's
Calming down.

Hope so. I actually got
A chance to miss him today.

That sounds good.
It is good.

Do you wanna
Grab my cellphone and call?

Uh, no.
Tomorrow's fine.

You sure? It's early. You guys
Could hook up for a little.

I'm hanging out with lane.

Lane?
Yeah.

We have some serious
C.D. Listening to do.

We're way behind on all the
Elvis costello reissues.

I didn't think lane could
Hang out past 9:00.

Her mom's at an antique fair in
Woodbury until sunday.

Her grandmother's staying with
Her, she's asleep by 6:00.

We thought we'd be really bad
And sneak out to luke's.

You're going to luke's?
Yeah, maybe.

Why go to luke's?
I mean, you just had 10 rolls.

You had 10.
I don't even know if we'll go.

It's just a maybe.

Okay, okay.
Well, you guys have fun.

Okay. See you later.

Sure you don't wanna
Call dean?

Nope.
Tomorrow's fine.

Yeah.
Tomorrow's fine.

[ slow rock 'n' roll plays ]

* la-la la-la-la *

* la-la la-la-la *

* la-la la-la... *

Dean...

She likes jess, doesn't she?

[ sighs ]

* la-la la-la-la *

* la-la la-la-la *

[ theme music ]