All language subtitles for Welcome.Home.Nikki.Glaser.S01E05.720p.WEBRip.x264-GalaxyTV

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian Download
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,741 --> 00:00:10,831 - Were you a scared child? - Yeah. 2 00:00:10,874 --> 00:00:12,664 You know, going into your parents' bedroom to sleep. 3 00:00:12,702 --> 00:00:14,362 - Aw. - Like, I was afraid of Freddy 4 00:00:14,399 --> 00:00:15,789 from "Nightmare on Elm Street." - Mm-hmm. 5 00:00:15,835 --> 00:00:17,445 You would end up in your parents' bed a lot. 6 00:00:17,489 --> 00:00:21,189 Oh, I slept in my parents' bedroom till late eighth grade. 7 00:00:21,232 --> 00:00:23,452 I remember the last time, because I was old enough 8 00:00:23,495 --> 00:00:25,495 to know that my parents could be having sex. 9 00:00:25,541 --> 00:00:28,461 So I knocked to make sure that they weren't like, 10 00:00:28,500 --> 00:00:29,760 [exasperated voice] "Yeah?" 11 00:00:29,806 --> 00:00:32,326 I'd take my chances 1,000 out of 1,000 times 12 00:00:32,374 --> 00:00:34,164 with Freddy over my dad's balls. 13 00:00:34,202 --> 00:00:35,992 - Ugh. - [laughs] 14 00:00:36,030 --> 00:00:38,820 ♪ I wanna miss my flight 15 00:00:38,858 --> 00:00:44,208 ♪ I feel so all alone out on the road ♪ 16 00:00:44,255 --> 00:00:47,165 ♪ Can you welcome me home? 17 00:00:47,215 --> 00:00:50,905 [upbeat music] 18 00:00:50,957 --> 00:00:52,387 You guys, how was Chicago? 19 00:00:52,437 --> 00:00:54,307 Chi-town, what's goin' on, baby? 20 00:00:54,352 --> 00:00:56,012 Is that what you have to say when you say "Chicago"? 21 00:00:56,050 --> 00:00:57,140 You have to say that when you-- 22 00:00:57,181 --> 00:00:59,101 Chi-town, what's goin' on? 23 00:00:59,140 --> 00:01:01,360 It was awesome. We went to a bird sanctuary. 24 00:01:01,403 --> 00:01:04,013 - Oh, my gosh. - That was wild. 25 00:01:04,058 --> 00:01:05,358 Well, it's just a normal house. 26 00:01:05,407 --> 00:01:08,447 There were 70 cages. I mean, it's crazy. 27 00:01:08,497 --> 00:01:10,367 Oh, my God. I think this-- 28 00:01:10,412 --> 00:01:12,072 this might be it. - Oh, my... 29 00:01:12,109 --> 00:01:14,239 - Holy----. - [laughing] 30 00:01:14,285 --> 00:01:16,545 [bird cawing] - Oh, my God. 31 00:01:16,592 --> 00:01:18,992 Like, Chicago was great. But it was kind of awkward. 32 00:01:19,029 --> 00:01:20,729 I had to ride the elevator up 33 00:01:20,770 --> 00:01:24,120 with my parents and Chris up to our floor, 34 00:01:24,165 --> 00:01:26,725 and they saw us, you know, go off together, 35 00:01:26,776 --> 00:01:28,336 and probably knew what was going to happen, 36 00:01:28,386 --> 00:01:30,556 based on my act. - Wah-wah-wah-wah. 37 00:01:30,606 --> 00:01:37,216 So we consummated our... uh, love? 38 00:01:37,265 --> 00:01:39,265 Um, yeah, we had sex. 39 00:01:39,310 --> 00:01:41,270 Ready for a wild night? - No. 40 00:01:41,312 --> 00:01:45,142 Presently occupied. Yeah... 41 00:01:45,186 --> 00:01:47,276 I have no regrets. It was great, 42 00:01:47,318 --> 00:01:50,578 and I feel really secure about my decision to do that. 43 00:01:50,626 --> 00:01:52,186 I just feel like it was the most responsible sex 44 00:01:52,236 --> 00:01:54,756 I've ever had. 45 00:01:54,804 --> 00:01:57,374 Still didn't use a condom, but still responsible. 46 00:01:57,415 --> 00:01:59,105 Kerstin, do you want kids? 47 00:02:01,115 --> 00:02:03,155 I mean, I do if it happens. 48 00:02:03,204 --> 00:02:07,384 But I'm not gonna go like to the ends of the Earth to, like, 49 00:02:07,425 --> 00:02:11,335 "I must have a family to feel fulfilled!" 50 00:02:11,386 --> 00:02:13,256 Nikki, do you want kids? 51 00:02:13,301 --> 00:02:14,951 If we came up with a plan 52 00:02:14,998 --> 00:02:18,178 where it was like I wasn't the one having to do everything. 53 00:02:18,219 --> 00:02:22,139 Like, my dad was very-- he played with us all the time, 54 00:02:22,179 --> 00:02:24,049 all the time. My mom was not, like, 55 00:02:24,094 --> 00:02:25,884 on the floor playing with us. 56 00:02:25,922 --> 00:02:28,622 I feel like I'm ready to commit to Chris 57 00:02:28,664 --> 00:02:32,104 and move forward, but to ask him if he's down 58 00:02:32,146 --> 00:02:36,926 for marrying me some day and possibly having a family? 59 00:02:36,976 --> 00:02:39,496 We've never talked about things like that. 60 00:02:39,544 --> 00:02:41,814 We could still do what we've been doing, but, you know, 61 00:02:41,851 --> 00:02:43,291 with contracts involved. 62 00:02:43,331 --> 00:02:45,071 Does Brenna want kids? 63 00:02:45,115 --> 00:02:47,375 Mm... Look. 64 00:02:47,422 --> 00:02:50,162 By the time we have kids, she'll be an adult. 65 00:02:50,207 --> 00:02:52,777 [laughter] 66 00:02:52,818 --> 00:02:54,388 She's 25. 67 00:02:56,257 --> 00:02:57,777 When I play guitar and sing in my house, 68 00:02:57,823 --> 00:02:59,223 like, it's an embarrassing thing. 69 00:02:59,260 --> 00:03:00,830 I don't really like him to overhear it. 70 00:03:00,870 --> 00:03:02,650 I'd rather you hear me masturbating, honestly, 71 00:03:02,698 --> 00:03:04,398 'cause it sounds pretty masturbatory. 72 00:03:04,439 --> 00:03:06,049 Yeah, I don't know what's the difference. 73 00:03:06,092 --> 00:03:08,272 [both laugh] 74 00:03:08,312 --> 00:03:10,492 My howls-- 75 00:03:10,532 --> 00:03:11,662 my lonesome howls. - Yeah, I was like, 76 00:03:11,707 --> 00:03:13,267 "Man, she hit that note finally." 77 00:03:13,317 --> 00:03:14,447 Yeah. 78 00:03:14,492 --> 00:03:17,672 [calm music] 79 00:03:17,713 --> 00:03:19,503 ♪ 80 00:03:19,541 --> 00:03:21,241 [knocking] [dogs barking] 81 00:03:21,282 --> 00:03:22,242 It's you. Come on in. 82 00:03:22,283 --> 00:03:23,633 - Hey, Julie. - Hey! 83 00:03:23,675 --> 00:03:25,325 - Hi, how are you? - Dad, this is Arya. 84 00:03:25,373 --> 00:03:26,503 - Hey, Arya. - Nice to meet you. 85 00:03:26,548 --> 00:03:28,108 Nice to meet you. 86 00:03:28,158 --> 00:03:30,328 - Hi! - Hi! 87 00:03:30,378 --> 00:03:31,898 So good to see you. 88 00:03:31,944 --> 00:03:34,034 - Hey, Luigi, please. - Luigi, quit it. 89 00:03:34,077 --> 00:03:35,207 Just stop it. 90 00:03:35,252 --> 00:03:36,432 You have a lovely home. 91 00:03:36,471 --> 00:03:38,861 Oh, my gosh. Thank you for being here. 92 00:03:38,908 --> 00:03:40,868 - Absolutely. - I wanna be taken seriously 93 00:03:40,910 --> 00:03:43,350 as a singer, so I actually started taking 94 00:03:43,391 --> 00:03:46,701 singing lessons a couple months ago with Arya, 95 00:03:46,742 --> 00:03:50,182 and... we haven't really done much singing. 96 00:03:50,224 --> 00:03:52,704 [chimes chiming] 97 00:03:52,748 --> 00:03:54,748 You really have awesome skin. 98 00:03:54,793 --> 00:03:56,583 I'm not a Christian or anything like that. 99 00:03:56,621 --> 00:03:58,141 - Sure, sure. - But, just like, mother nature 100 00:03:58,188 --> 00:03:59,228 give me a sign. - Right. 101 00:03:59,276 --> 00:04:00,536 Universe, give me a sign. 102 00:04:00,582 --> 00:04:02,372 My coach and I have just become friends, 103 00:04:02,410 --> 00:04:05,280 and I haven't sang one note yet. 104 00:04:05,326 --> 00:04:08,626 I guess what I would love for you to help us with today, 105 00:04:08,677 --> 00:04:10,547 because we are performing a song-- 106 00:04:10,592 --> 00:04:11,772 You guys both are? Together? 107 00:04:11,810 --> 00:04:13,290 Yeah, I'm doing a live podcasts tonight. 108 00:04:13,334 --> 00:04:15,554 I just learned it 15 minutes ago. 109 00:04:15,597 --> 00:04:17,597 Yeah, I mean, I learned this song too. 110 00:04:17,642 --> 00:04:20,042 But, you know, I've only sang it one day. 111 00:04:20,079 --> 00:04:24,559 ♪ There's a red truck sittin' under a street lamp ♪ 112 00:04:24,606 --> 00:04:27,126 ♪ Full of dents and rust 113 00:04:27,173 --> 00:04:29,263 ♪ The bed is empty 114 00:04:29,306 --> 00:04:30,786 I'll be singing the bulk of it, 115 00:04:30,829 --> 00:04:32,399 but then, my dad and I want to work 116 00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:34,220 on some harmonies for the chorus. 117 00:04:34,268 --> 00:04:35,918 Absolutely, absolutely. 118 00:04:35,965 --> 00:04:38,005 Can I have some vocal warm-ups, maybe, 119 00:04:38,054 --> 00:04:39,324 that would help? 120 00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:41,100 Yeah. Do you have a keyboard, or a-- 121 00:04:41,144 --> 00:04:42,154 Yeah, right over here. 122 00:04:42,188 --> 00:04:43,538 We have a tiny piano over there. 123 00:04:43,581 --> 00:04:47,321 It's my first time singing a sincere original song 124 00:04:47,368 --> 00:04:53,898 in front of people, and I am feeling nervous. 125 00:04:53,939 --> 00:04:57,599 I'm a beginner. I don't think I'm Adele. 126 00:04:57,639 --> 00:05:00,339 I think I'm a Dell computer... 127 00:05:00,381 --> 00:05:02,341 that the speakers are blown out. 128 00:05:02,383 --> 00:05:04,693 ♪ Ah ah ah ah ah 129 00:05:04,733 --> 00:05:06,913 ♪ Ah ah ah ah ah ♪ 130 00:05:06,952 --> 00:05:09,002 ♪ Brr 131 00:05:09,041 --> 00:05:11,131 ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah 132 00:05:11,174 --> 00:05:13,394 ♪ Ah ah ah ah ah 133 00:05:13,437 --> 00:05:16,137 ♪ Brr - Come on. 134 00:05:16,179 --> 00:05:18,049 ♪ Brr 135 00:05:18,094 --> 00:05:19,494 All right, all right. 136 00:05:19,530 --> 00:05:20,620 I haven't smoked weed for two months, 137 00:05:20,662 --> 00:05:22,272 and my voice has not changed at all. 138 00:05:22,316 --> 00:05:24,446 Like, it just feels like I still-- 139 00:05:24,492 --> 00:05:26,362 like, it's impossible. 140 00:05:26,407 --> 00:05:30,147 - Yeah, it is possible. - So frustrating. 141 00:05:30,193 --> 00:05:31,503 Oh, Nikki. 142 00:05:31,542 --> 00:05:34,462 - I just hate sounding bad. - You sound great. 143 00:05:34,502 --> 00:05:36,162 I know, but I can't hit these high notes. 144 00:05:36,199 --> 00:05:38,509 I just wanna be Taylor Swift, and I can't. 145 00:05:38,549 --> 00:05:40,329 - [laughs] - I just won't ever be able 146 00:05:40,377 --> 00:05:41,767 to sing. - You're not gonna-- 147 00:05:41,813 --> 00:05:43,953 - Just sing a lower octave. - In these songs, 148 00:05:43,989 --> 00:05:45,559 you're not gonna be singing that high. 149 00:05:45,600 --> 00:05:47,650 But I can't even hit octaves she hits in her low octaves. 150 00:05:47,689 --> 00:05:49,299 Well, you have a different voice. 151 00:05:49,343 --> 00:05:50,653 - But I want-- - I can't sing 152 00:05:50,692 --> 00:05:52,652 like Frankie Valli, but big deal. 153 00:05:52,694 --> 00:05:54,874 I don't have the best voice. 154 00:05:54,913 --> 00:05:56,523 Can we sing the other song? - Please. 155 00:05:56,567 --> 00:05:58,047 I would love to hear the other song. 156 00:05:58,090 --> 00:05:59,700 There is a rasp, honey, 157 00:05:59,744 --> 00:06:02,014 'cause I smoked for many years. 158 00:06:02,051 --> 00:06:03,231 I just, like, seem like 159 00:06:03,269 --> 00:06:06,489 I'm an old, like, you know, talent agent. 160 00:06:06,534 --> 00:06:09,494 [guitar playing] 161 00:06:09,537 --> 00:06:11,667 ♪ 162 00:06:11,713 --> 00:06:16,153 ♪ Tell me something, Dad 163 00:06:16,195 --> 00:06:21,105 ♪ What did I do to make you so damn mad? ♪ 164 00:06:21,157 --> 00:06:23,807 ♪ This song's off the deep end ♪ 165 00:06:23,855 --> 00:06:26,205 ♪ Where did we go wrong? 166 00:06:26,249 --> 00:06:30,909 ♪ I want us to get along 167 00:06:30,949 --> 00:06:32,949 ♪ It's too late for that now ♪ 168 00:06:32,995 --> 00:06:35,515 ♪ I'm kicking you out now 169 00:06:35,563 --> 00:06:38,783 ♪ And I'm gonna bang your mom ♪ 170 00:06:38,827 --> 00:06:40,257 ♪ 171 00:06:40,306 --> 00:06:41,916 ♪ I'm gonna bang 172 00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:44,880 ♪ I'm gonna bang your mom 173 00:06:44,920 --> 00:06:49,930 ♪ I've heard you bang, I've heard you bang my mom ♪ 174 00:06:49,968 --> 00:06:51,538 ♪ I've heard her moans - That's not nice. 175 00:06:51,579 --> 00:06:54,539 ♪ Because we share a wall 176 00:06:54,582 --> 00:06:58,242 ♪ This is my impression of Mom ♪ 177 00:06:58,281 --> 00:07:00,241 Oh, God. I can hear this. 178 00:07:00,283 --> 00:07:05,243 ♪ Oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh 179 00:07:05,288 --> 00:07:08,158 ♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh 180 00:07:08,204 --> 00:07:09,774 ♪ Ah-ah-ah 181 00:07:09,814 --> 00:07:15,734 ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah 182 00:07:15,777 --> 00:07:18,257 ♪ This song is so gross now 183 00:07:18,301 --> 00:07:20,611 ♪ The end must be close now - ♪ Must be close now 184 00:07:20,651 --> 00:07:24,701 both: ♪ Where do we go from here? ♪ 185 00:07:24,742 --> 00:07:25,922 ♪ We gotta go 186 00:07:25,961 --> 00:07:28,571 ♪ We gotta end this show 187 00:07:28,616 --> 00:07:33,186 ♪ Grandma's got another sailor to blow ♪ 188 00:07:33,229 --> 00:07:35,059 - [sighs] - What the----? 189 00:07:35,100 --> 00:07:37,100 That is awful. 190 00:07:37,146 --> 00:07:38,926 That's every bit of hilarious and more. 191 00:07:38,974 --> 00:07:42,064 - Thanks. - When did you write that? 192 00:07:42,107 --> 00:07:43,587 Last summer. 193 00:07:43,631 --> 00:07:45,551 My mom would love this. She had a good sense of humor. 194 00:07:45,589 --> 00:07:46,719 - Yeah, yeah. - She'd definitely approve. 195 00:07:46,764 --> 00:07:48,114 - What about your wife... - And it's true. 196 00:07:48,157 --> 00:07:49,847 And what about your mother? About your mother? 197 00:07:49,898 --> 00:07:51,508 Oh, yeah, would you check with Mom? She's alive. 198 00:07:51,552 --> 00:07:52,902 You can actually check with Mom. 199 00:07:52,944 --> 00:07:53,904 I'm alive. I'm right here. 200 00:07:53,945 --> 00:07:55,025 We know you're fine with it. 201 00:07:55,077 --> 00:07:57,117 Ah, great. [laughter] 202 00:08:03,085 --> 00:08:04,255 Facials! 203 00:08:04,303 --> 00:08:05,353 It's like the spa. 204 00:08:05,391 --> 00:08:07,001 Oh, my God. 205 00:08:07,045 --> 00:08:08,605 [laughs] 206 00:08:08,656 --> 00:08:10,306 This ain't too bad. 207 00:08:10,353 --> 00:08:12,493 Do you think facialists really wanna put, like, 208 00:08:12,529 --> 00:08:13,699 eyes here and, like, do that top? 209 00:08:13,748 --> 00:08:15,578 Oh, my God, that is so fun. 210 00:08:15,619 --> 00:08:17,139 Oh, I got some eyes. 211 00:08:17,186 --> 00:08:18,396 Okay, this is weird. 212 00:08:18,448 --> 00:08:19,668 Just stay still. 213 00:08:19,710 --> 00:08:21,190 - Wait, now smoke a cigarette. - Here we go. 214 00:08:21,233 --> 00:08:22,633 [laughs] 215 00:08:22,670 --> 00:08:24,020 Mrs. Featherbottom. 216 00:08:24,062 --> 00:08:25,982 [British accent] What are you girls doing? 217 00:08:26,021 --> 00:08:29,151 You can't smoke inside, ma'am. 218 00:08:29,198 --> 00:08:31,638 Oh, this cigarette's delicious. 219 00:08:31,679 --> 00:08:33,809 Ma'am, your driver's waiting out back. 220 00:08:33,855 --> 00:08:36,635 [laughs] Okay, are you girls done? 221 00:08:36,684 --> 00:08:37,994 Yes. 222 00:08:38,033 --> 00:08:40,643 [normally] This has gone off the track. 223 00:08:40,688 --> 00:08:43,728 [upbeat music] 224 00:08:43,778 --> 00:08:45,388 Am I supposed to be doing anything? 225 00:08:45,431 --> 00:08:46,691 You can paddle. 226 00:08:46,737 --> 00:08:49,217 You know what--an issue I have with canoeing? 227 00:08:49,261 --> 00:08:50,481 What is it? 228 00:08:50,524 --> 00:08:52,354 That you always gotta keep switching sides. 229 00:08:52,395 --> 00:08:53,785 You actually don't. If you look at me, 230 00:08:53,831 --> 00:08:55,311 I'm doing the J stroke. 231 00:08:55,354 --> 00:08:57,404 Because I'm missing a muscle on my left side, 232 00:08:57,443 --> 00:08:58,883 I always paddle on the right. 233 00:08:58,923 --> 00:09:00,583 There's also something in the front 234 00:09:00,621 --> 00:09:02,751 called a cross-bow draw stroke, 235 00:09:02,797 --> 00:09:04,627 which is really cool. 236 00:09:04,668 --> 00:09:06,318 Cool. 237 00:09:06,365 --> 00:09:08,235 My dad loves the outdoors. 238 00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:09,590 He loves adventure. He loves canoeing. 239 00:09:09,630 --> 00:09:11,020 He loves trees. 240 00:09:11,066 --> 00:09:12,936 He loves eagles. He loves hawks. 241 00:09:12,981 --> 00:09:15,291 He loves every single thing about the outdoors. 242 00:09:15,331 --> 00:09:16,851 Listen. 243 00:09:16,898 --> 00:09:18,248 [distant birds calling] Hear that? 244 00:09:18,290 --> 00:09:20,080 No! 245 00:09:20,118 --> 00:09:23,338 And I don't care about the outdoors. 246 00:09:23,382 --> 00:09:25,522 Did Mom like outdoors when you first met her, 247 00:09:25,559 --> 00:09:27,039 or did you get her into it? 248 00:09:27,082 --> 00:09:29,742 Um... kind of got her into it, I guess. 249 00:09:29,780 --> 00:09:32,090 When did you know Mom was the one? 250 00:09:32,130 --> 00:09:33,740 When you got her pregnant? - I had to work-- 251 00:09:33,784 --> 00:09:35,354 - Just kidding. - [laughs] 252 00:09:35,394 --> 00:09:37,614 How soon did you ask if she wanted to have kids? 253 00:09:37,658 --> 00:09:38,918 Pretty quickly, 'cause if she didn't, 254 00:09:38,963 --> 00:09:40,183 I would just move on. 255 00:09:40,225 --> 00:09:42,395 How do you deal with conflict with Mom? 256 00:09:42,445 --> 00:09:44,225 Do you tell her right away? 257 00:09:44,273 --> 00:09:45,623 Uh, yeah. 258 00:09:45,666 --> 00:09:48,626 I mean, I do keep my mouth shut a lot of times. 259 00:09:48,669 --> 00:09:50,109 When it's someone I don't like romantically, 260 00:09:50,148 --> 00:09:52,848 I can stand up for myself anytime, 261 00:09:52,890 --> 00:09:55,760 but when it's a romantic pursuit, 262 00:09:55,806 --> 00:09:58,026 it becomes literally impossible 263 00:09:58,069 --> 00:10:01,989 because I just am so awkward when it comes to romance. 264 00:10:02,030 --> 00:10:05,600 Asking the guy you're dating and sleeping with now 265 00:10:05,642 --> 00:10:08,732 about your future and marriage and kids 266 00:10:08,776 --> 00:10:10,206 and all of these things 267 00:10:10,255 --> 00:10:12,165 that I should probably already know the answers to-- 268 00:10:12,214 --> 00:10:15,304 it's really scary, and I wanna be the cool girl. 269 00:10:15,347 --> 00:10:16,517 I don't wanna be the girl 270 00:10:16,566 --> 00:10:17,566 that's pressuring a guy to get married. 271 00:10:17,611 --> 00:10:19,351 Guys hate that girl. 272 00:10:19,395 --> 00:10:23,265 That's why I'm, like, excited about Chris more than ever. 273 00:10:23,312 --> 00:10:26,052 I just feel like he thinks the world of me, 274 00:10:26,097 --> 00:10:27,927 and like I know he loves me. 275 00:10:27,969 --> 00:10:29,839 Look at this battleship. 276 00:10:29,884 --> 00:10:32,804 - What? - Look at to the right. 277 00:10:32,843 --> 00:10:34,153 Okay, that actually is cool 278 00:10:34,192 --> 00:10:35,112 and worthy of interrupting my... 279 00:10:35,150 --> 00:10:36,590 That is a battle--[laughs] 280 00:10:36,630 --> 00:10:37,940 - Emotional... - That is so cool. 281 00:10:37,979 --> 00:10:39,679 Look at that. - Story. 282 00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:41,980 So you were saying, with Chris... 283 00:10:42,026 --> 00:10:44,326 He's so great and so-- he's always there for me. 284 00:10:44,376 --> 00:10:46,546 Look how cool that is. You know, I read about this. 285 00:10:46,596 --> 00:10:47,986 They have battleship wars. 286 00:10:48,032 --> 00:10:49,342 There's another one over there. 287 00:10:49,381 --> 00:10:52,471 I feel like one's going in my heart right now. 288 00:10:53,821 --> 00:10:55,911 Not to make this not romantic, 289 00:10:55,953 --> 00:10:57,873 but you're just a good... 290 00:10:57,912 --> 00:10:59,702 - We're a good team. - You're a good teammate. 291 00:10:59,740 --> 00:11:01,350 He gets me out of my head and-- - I'm good for perspective. 292 00:11:01,393 --> 00:11:02,533 Yeah. 293 00:11:02,568 --> 00:11:04,308 Anybody could've helped Nikki with that. 294 00:11:04,353 --> 00:11:05,833 They just had to-- 295 00:11:05,876 --> 00:11:08,706 But they don't have sex with me at the same time. 296 00:11:08,749 --> 00:11:10,529 Your perspective is my back. 297 00:11:10,576 --> 00:11:12,616 No! Stop! 298 00:11:12,666 --> 00:11:14,406 Come on. 299 00:11:14,450 --> 00:11:16,710 [both laughing] 300 00:11:17,888 --> 00:11:20,938 [upbeat music] 301 00:11:20,978 --> 00:11:21,978 Julie, what do you think about one of these 302 00:11:22,023 --> 00:11:23,943 in our house? - Don't touch it. 303 00:11:23,981 --> 00:11:25,641 Hi! How's it going? 304 00:11:25,679 --> 00:11:26,769 Good. How are you? 305 00:11:26,810 --> 00:11:27,770 Are you guys coming to the show? 306 00:11:27,811 --> 00:11:29,201 Nice! 307 00:11:30,553 --> 00:11:32,293 Oh, look at this mirror. Did you see this mirror? 308 00:11:32,337 --> 00:11:35,947 Yeah. If you want body dysmorphia... 309 00:11:35,993 --> 00:11:38,003 That's great. Look, Jules, look. 310 00:11:38,039 --> 00:11:39,609 This is so Hank Williams, Jr. 311 00:11:39,649 --> 00:11:41,389 What about it? 312 00:11:41,433 --> 00:11:43,873 Do you think I haven't seen one of these mirrors before? 313 00:11:43,914 --> 00:11:45,834 Like, how old are you? 314 00:11:45,873 --> 00:11:47,313 7:00. Showtime. 315 00:11:47,352 --> 00:11:49,572 Nikki, I'm gonna have to plug in our stuff. 316 00:11:49,615 --> 00:11:50,785 - Okay. - Yeah. 317 00:11:50,834 --> 00:11:52,234 Andrew, are you ready? 318 00:11:52,270 --> 00:11:53,450 - We gotta go sit down. - We gotta go sit down. 319 00:11:53,489 --> 00:11:54,579 You know I always am. 320 00:11:54,620 --> 00:11:56,060 ♪ 321 00:11:56,100 --> 00:11:57,970 Hi. Are you Arya? 322 00:11:58,015 --> 00:11:59,275 - I am. - I'm Chris. 323 00:11:59,321 --> 00:12:00,411 Did I say that right? - It's nice to meet you. 324 00:12:00,452 --> 00:12:01,722 Nice to meet you. 325 00:12:01,758 --> 00:12:03,018 This is Noa. 326 00:12:03,064 --> 00:12:05,544 She's a producer on Nikki's podcast. 327 00:12:05,588 --> 00:12:07,108 [soft guitar music] 328 00:12:07,155 --> 00:12:08,585 ♪ Have you ever done a podcast? ♪ 329 00:12:08,634 --> 00:12:09,904 ♪ I have 330 00:12:09,940 --> 00:12:11,510 ♪ Have you ever done a live one? ♪ 331 00:12:11,550 --> 00:12:12,730 ♪ I have 332 00:12:12,769 --> 00:12:14,599 ♪ I'm about to go out there 333 00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:16,950 ♪ And I'm experiencing stage fright ♪ 334 00:12:16,991 --> 00:12:18,861 [music winds down] 335 00:12:18,906 --> 00:12:20,816 I believe in living your dreams, 336 00:12:20,864 --> 00:12:22,304 but I just don't wanna be 337 00:12:22,344 --> 00:12:25,744 the actress who switches to singing, and everyone goes, 338 00:12:25,782 --> 00:12:27,572 "Mm, stick to what you're good at." 339 00:12:27,610 --> 00:12:29,090 Okay, I'm ready. 340 00:12:29,133 --> 00:12:32,443 Like, I don't wanna hear Taylor Swift do comedy. 341 00:12:32,484 --> 00:12:34,314 [indistinct announcement] - Here we go. 342 00:12:34,356 --> 00:12:35,786 And I fear that Taylor Swift would be better at comedy 343 00:12:35,836 --> 00:12:36,876 than me right out of the gate, 344 00:12:36,924 --> 00:12:39,544 because she's good at everything. 345 00:12:40,101 --> 00:12:41,711 And here's Nikki! 346 00:12:41,755 --> 00:12:45,315 [cheers and applause] 347 00:12:53,418 --> 00:12:55,938 [upbeat music] 348 00:12:55,986 --> 00:12:58,376 Here's Nikki! [cheers and applause] 349 00:12:58,423 --> 00:13:02,823 Welcome to "The Nikki Glaser Podcast" Live Edition! 350 00:13:02,863 --> 00:13:05,173 [cheers and applause] Oh, my God! 351 00:13:05,213 --> 00:13:08,693 Noa, how are we feeling? 352 00:13:08,738 --> 00:13:11,048 - This is unbelievable, Nikki. - It's so exciting. 353 00:13:11,088 --> 00:13:13,658 Uh, you texted me, "Mandy's here," 354 00:13:13,699 --> 00:13:15,659 and I was like, "Who's Mandy?" 355 00:13:15,701 --> 00:13:17,181 And you go, "The masseuse." 356 00:13:17,225 --> 00:13:18,965 She's going to join us on stage, 357 00:13:19,009 --> 00:13:21,229 and she's just gonna rub my feet during the show, 358 00:13:21,272 --> 00:13:22,622 if that's okay with people, 359 00:13:22,665 --> 00:13:24,615 because embracing my bunions has been very hard. 360 00:13:24,667 --> 00:13:26,497 Mandy, come on up, but please don't speak. 361 00:13:26,538 --> 00:13:28,368 [cheers and applause] 362 00:13:28,410 --> 00:13:30,370 I'm just kidding. Welcome Mandy to the stage. 363 00:13:30,412 --> 00:13:32,282 Hi, Mandy. 364 00:13:32,327 --> 00:13:34,587 Thank you so much. This is, like, amazing. 365 00:13:34,633 --> 00:13:37,463 I am so excited for this. You're welcome. 366 00:13:37,506 --> 00:13:40,156 [laughter] 367 00:13:40,204 --> 00:13:42,864 Should we bring in... Andrew! 368 00:13:42,903 --> 00:13:45,383 [cheers and applause] 369 00:13:45,427 --> 00:13:48,257 Hey, hey. Buddy, hey. 370 00:13:48,299 --> 00:13:50,389 Hey! 371 00:13:50,432 --> 00:13:52,002 ♪ 372 00:13:52,042 --> 00:13:53,612 Have you ever seen a foot like this? 373 00:13:53,652 --> 00:13:54,872 Her dad has the same foot, I learned. 374 00:13:54,915 --> 00:13:56,385 This bunion's even bigger. 375 00:13:58,440 --> 00:14:00,660 Okay, so I went over to my parents' house 376 00:14:00,703 --> 00:14:03,793 and had a singing lesson with my new best friend, Arya, 377 00:14:03,837 --> 00:14:05,837 to coach me and my dad on a song 378 00:14:05,882 --> 00:14:06,882 because there might be some music 379 00:14:06,927 --> 00:14:08,147 later on in the show. 380 00:14:08,189 --> 00:14:09,709 It makes me feel really insecure 381 00:14:09,755 --> 00:14:11,405 when I'm singing in front of people. 382 00:14:11,453 --> 00:14:14,463 I would literally rather do, like, a donkey show 383 00:14:14,499 --> 00:14:16,239 than this. 384 00:14:16,284 --> 00:14:18,034 But I just have to remember, 385 00:14:18,068 --> 00:14:19,328 doing stand-up for the first time 386 00:14:19,374 --> 00:14:21,074 my freshman year of college, I was so nervous, 387 00:14:21,115 --> 00:14:22,415 because a lot was riding on this. 388 00:14:22,464 --> 00:14:24,254 This didn't work out, I didn't-- 389 00:14:24,292 --> 00:14:25,772 I don't know what I was gonna do. 390 00:14:25,815 --> 00:14:27,505 Oh, my dad called me today, 391 00:14:27,556 --> 00:14:29,856 and he told me that he really wants me 392 00:14:29,906 --> 00:14:32,296 to stop smoking so much pot. 393 00:14:32,343 --> 00:14:35,093 He thinks I'm losing interest in things that I once loved, 394 00:14:35,129 --> 00:14:37,309 which--completely not true, 395 00:14:37,348 --> 00:14:39,788 because I still, like, love smoking pot. 396 00:14:39,829 --> 00:14:42,179 [laughter] 397 00:14:42,223 --> 00:14:44,573 I remember having my jokes on a little piece of paper 398 00:14:44,616 --> 00:14:46,656 that was, like, soaked in sweat, 399 00:14:46,705 --> 00:14:48,005 and as soon as I got my first laugh, 400 00:14:48,055 --> 00:14:49,095 I was like, "Okay, I got this." 401 00:14:49,143 --> 00:14:51,363 So with singing, that's all I want. 402 00:14:51,406 --> 00:14:53,536 We have just a little more show left for you, 403 00:14:53,582 --> 00:14:55,982 and it's gonna change the tone a little bit. 404 00:14:56,019 --> 00:14:57,539 Dad, do you wanna set up? 405 00:14:57,586 --> 00:14:58,976 - Sure. - Okay, my dad, EJ, 406 00:14:59,022 --> 00:15:01,112 is gonna play a song with me. 407 00:15:01,155 --> 00:15:04,195 Thank you, Andrew! Thank you, Noa. 408 00:15:04,245 --> 00:15:06,725 [soft guitar music] 409 00:15:06,769 --> 00:15:08,989 It's a really good song, by the way. Matt-- 410 00:15:09,032 --> 00:15:10,862 I love that you have to tell them that. 411 00:15:10,904 --> 00:15:14,124 No, he's a hell of a songwriter. 412 00:15:14,168 --> 00:15:16,298 ♪ There's a red truck 413 00:15:16,344 --> 00:15:18,964 ♪ Sitting under a streetlamp 414 00:15:18,999 --> 00:15:21,829 ♪ Full of dents and rust 415 00:15:21,871 --> 00:15:23,311 ♪ But my bed is empty 416 00:15:23,351 --> 00:15:25,441 ♪ It's the same deal 417 00:15:25,483 --> 00:15:28,273 ♪ Up in this hotel room 418 00:15:28,312 --> 00:15:30,232 ♪ I've been known to feel 419 00:15:30,271 --> 00:15:32,931 ♪ More than my manager tells me ♪ 420 00:15:32,969 --> 00:15:36,969 ♪ And I'm praying to you 421 00:15:37,017 --> 00:15:40,147 ♪ St. Lou 422 00:15:40,194 --> 00:15:45,904 both: ♪ I'm praying to you, St. Lou ♪ 423 00:15:45,939 --> 00:15:48,159 ♪ 424 00:15:48,202 --> 00:15:51,122 [cheers and applause] 425 00:15:51,161 --> 00:15:53,511 Thank you, thank you. 426 00:15:53,555 --> 00:15:55,635 I'm actually really proud of myself 427 00:15:55,687 --> 00:15:57,167 singing about St. Louis. 428 00:15:57,211 --> 00:16:00,131 The song is amazing, and I also love St. Louis 429 00:16:00,170 --> 00:16:02,000 because my family's here. 430 00:16:02,042 --> 00:16:03,172 You can sing. 431 00:16:03,217 --> 00:16:04,517 - Ugh, thank you. - Yeah. 432 00:16:04,566 --> 00:16:07,346 Girl, oh, my gosh. Thank you. 433 00:16:07,395 --> 00:16:08,565 Although it wasn't perfect, 434 00:16:08,613 --> 00:16:10,143 and I could pick it apart to pieces, like, 435 00:16:10,180 --> 00:16:11,570 I'm never gonna sound like Adele 436 00:16:11,616 --> 00:16:13,046 or Ariana Grande, 437 00:16:13,096 --> 00:16:15,576 but you don't really have to sound perfect. 438 00:16:15,620 --> 00:16:18,190 You just have to sound like you. 439 00:16:18,232 --> 00:16:19,452 Lay-nay. 440 00:16:19,494 --> 00:16:20,674 Thank you so much for coming. 441 00:16:20,712 --> 00:16:21,672 Oh, yeah, of course. 442 00:16:21,713 --> 00:16:23,153 I was right here the whole time. 443 00:16:23,193 --> 00:16:24,853 Did you have fun? - Yeah, it was fun. 444 00:16:24,890 --> 00:16:25,980 I mean, the song was great. 445 00:16:26,022 --> 00:16:26,982 - Thank you. - Yeah. 446 00:16:27,023 --> 00:16:28,203 Thank you. 447 00:16:28,242 --> 00:16:29,552 Good to see you. 448 00:16:29,591 --> 00:16:30,641 Good night. 449 00:16:30,679 --> 00:16:33,549 ♪ 450 00:16:33,595 --> 00:16:35,245 Oh, my gosh, I love your shirt. 451 00:16:35,292 --> 00:16:37,562 You guys were so awesome when you sang that song. 452 00:16:37,599 --> 00:16:38,949 Like, I started crying. You guys were so great. 453 00:16:38,992 --> 00:16:40,082 - Really? - Yeah. 454 00:16:40,123 --> 00:16:41,173 - Thank you! - You're amazing. 455 00:16:41,211 --> 00:16:42,731 Thank you. 456 00:16:42,778 --> 00:16:44,348 Bye, girl. 457 00:16:44,388 --> 00:16:46,038 Too bad her zipper was down. 458 00:16:46,086 --> 00:16:48,036 [laughing] 459 00:16:48,088 --> 00:16:49,518 I should've told her. 460 00:16:55,921 --> 00:17:00,191 [upbeat music] 461 00:17:00,230 --> 00:17:02,320 Oh, mother of God! 462 00:17:02,363 --> 00:17:04,233 Jesus Christ. 463 00:17:04,278 --> 00:17:06,058 [sly music] 464 00:17:06,106 --> 00:17:08,016 Hello? 465 00:17:08,064 --> 00:17:09,414 Hello! - Hey. 466 00:17:09,457 --> 00:17:10,937 - You brought me presents? - No, it's not for you. 467 00:17:10,980 --> 00:17:12,810 It's for Andrew. - What? 468 00:17:12,851 --> 00:17:14,291 How you doing? 469 00:17:14,331 --> 00:17:16,331 - Hi! - How's a gal? 470 00:17:16,855 --> 00:17:17,935 How do they look? 471 00:17:17,987 --> 00:17:19,247 Pretty good, actually. 472 00:17:19,293 --> 00:17:21,083 I'm doing, like, multi-colors. - Are you doing-- 473 00:17:21,121 --> 00:17:22,731 Have you ever painted a nail? 474 00:17:22,774 --> 00:17:25,654 We did something that you were like, very-- 475 00:17:25,690 --> 00:17:27,000 Makeup? 476 00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:28,220 Maybe it was makeup. 477 00:17:28,258 --> 00:17:29,738 I just love putting on makeup 478 00:17:29,781 --> 00:17:32,311 'cause guys can look better with, like, slight makeup. 479 00:17:32,349 --> 00:17:33,999 Yeah, like what? 480 00:17:34,047 --> 00:17:36,307 Like, if--I would just define your brows a little bit more. 481 00:17:36,353 --> 00:17:37,493 What's that supposed to mean? 482 00:17:37,528 --> 00:17:39,308 They're undefined, just like us. 483 00:17:39,356 --> 00:17:41,486 [light music] 484 00:17:41,532 --> 00:17:43,142 That's really funny. 485 00:17:43,186 --> 00:17:44,876 What did you bring Andrew? 486 00:17:44,927 --> 00:17:46,667 Because I've come over here and tried to make a pizza, 487 00:17:46,711 --> 00:17:48,241 and I feel like he's desperate for it, 488 00:17:48,278 --> 00:17:51,328 this guy, and then a pizza cutter. 489 00:17:51,368 --> 00:17:53,238 Thank you so much! 490 00:17:53,283 --> 00:17:55,553 I'm so tired of watching him saw at things 491 00:17:55,590 --> 00:17:58,590 with a knife that's made to, like, cut fruit. 492 00:17:58,636 --> 00:18:01,026 It's kind of humiliating. There's a tool for every job. 493 00:18:01,074 --> 00:18:02,164 Yeah. 494 00:18:02,205 --> 00:18:03,505 Oh, did you see Poppy and Arlo? 495 00:18:03,554 --> 00:18:04,734 - Yeah. - How'd that go? 496 00:18:04,773 --> 00:18:05,773 It was so cute. 497 00:18:05,817 --> 00:18:07,077 - Yeah? - They like me so much. 498 00:18:07,123 --> 00:18:08,473 - Yeah! - So nice. 499 00:18:08,516 --> 00:18:09,596 I always think they're gonna forget me. 500 00:18:09,647 --> 00:18:10,467 When was the last time you saw them? 501 00:18:10,518 --> 00:18:12,128 At Lauren's baby sprinkle. 502 00:18:12,172 --> 00:18:13,352 Hi! 503 00:18:13,390 --> 00:18:15,350 When I see you, I want more of you, 504 00:18:15,392 --> 00:18:17,742 but I'm not guaranteed to get one like you. 505 00:18:17,786 --> 00:18:22,356 And my sister's pregnant A-F. She's so pregnant. 506 00:18:22,399 --> 00:18:23,879 How often do you see your niece and nephew? 507 00:18:23,922 --> 00:18:25,662 I think you see them, like, every day, don't you? 508 00:18:25,707 --> 00:18:27,187 Not every day, but pretty often. 509 00:18:27,230 --> 00:18:28,840 Do you want kids? 510 00:18:28,884 --> 00:18:33,064 Uh, I think I could be convinced on kids, 511 00:18:33,106 --> 00:18:35,406 which I know is not the best. 512 00:18:35,456 --> 00:18:38,366 I've honed an ability to ask men questions 513 00:18:38,415 --> 00:18:41,025 that I'm deeply invested in knowing the answers to 514 00:18:41,070 --> 00:18:42,250 in a way that makes it seem 515 00:18:42,289 --> 00:18:43,729 like, "Oh, I don't care about the answer. 516 00:18:43,768 --> 00:18:45,338 "Like, it's just a thing I thought of. 517 00:18:45,379 --> 00:18:46,729 "I haven't been thinking about this for weeks 518 00:18:46,771 --> 00:18:48,211 "and, like, working up the courage to ask you. 519 00:18:48,251 --> 00:18:49,381 "I'm not really serious. 520 00:18:49,426 --> 00:18:50,946 "Do you wanna be with me forever, like... 521 00:18:50,993 --> 00:18:52,473 "This is, like, Facebook quiz. Do you wanna take it? 522 00:18:52,516 --> 00:18:54,946 Like, do you, like, love me?" 523 00:18:54,997 --> 00:18:56,777 So, like, with you and me, 524 00:18:56,825 --> 00:18:57,905 do you ever think about, how... 525 00:18:57,956 --> 00:18:59,176 - No. - Like, my thoughts about-- 526 00:18:59,219 --> 00:19:01,699 [laughs] 527 00:19:01,743 --> 00:19:04,883 I'll pretend not to be deeply offended 528 00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:08,970 by the ease at which that joke came out of your mouth. 529 00:19:09,011 --> 00:19:11,231 But do you ever think about that with us? 530 00:19:11,274 --> 00:19:14,064 With what? 531 00:19:14,103 --> 00:19:17,193 Of us having kids. 532 00:19:17,237 --> 00:19:18,927 [lightly edgy music] 533 00:19:18,977 --> 00:19:19,977 Um, yeah, I would. 534 00:19:20,022 --> 00:19:23,592 I would do, like, anything for... 535 00:19:23,634 --> 00:19:26,464 like, the person that I ended up with or... 536 00:19:28,465 --> 00:19:31,285 You know, and I think that having kids 537 00:19:31,338 --> 00:19:33,818 could be a lot of fun. 538 00:19:34,776 --> 00:19:35,816 All right. 539 00:19:35,864 --> 00:19:37,694 Just wanted to throw it out there. 540 00:19:37,735 --> 00:19:39,555 - I would say-- - Listen, I don't even know 541 00:19:39,607 --> 00:19:41,257 if you want me to be your girlfriend anytime soon. 542 00:19:41,304 --> 00:19:42,744 Neither of us do. 543 00:19:42,784 --> 00:19:44,314 I-I would like it, yeah. 544 00:19:44,351 --> 00:19:45,661 I know that I would like it. 545 00:19:45,700 --> 00:19:48,270 Honestly, if we get back together, 546 00:19:48,311 --> 00:19:49,881 we should just get engaged. 547 00:19:49,921 --> 00:19:52,621 Oh, yeah? 548 00:19:52,663 --> 00:19:55,753 Sometimes, I'm like, "Glase just wants to be a wife, 549 00:19:55,797 --> 00:19:59,277 "and it's whatever sucker is willing to do it." 550 00:19:59,322 --> 00:20:00,672 I could be married right now... 551 00:20:00,715 --> 00:20:02,455 - I'm just kidding. - If I wanted to be anyone. 552 00:20:02,499 --> 00:20:04,239 No, I know you think that sometimes. 553 00:20:04,284 --> 00:20:06,554 - I'm just kidding! - You do. 554 00:20:06,590 --> 00:20:08,550 You said it as a joke, but I know you think that. 555 00:20:08,592 --> 00:20:10,642 - All right. - You think you're a sucker. 556 00:20:10,681 --> 00:20:12,731 I could find some schmuck to marry me. 557 00:20:12,770 --> 00:20:14,420 This isn't the hard thing. 558 00:20:14,468 --> 00:20:16,028 I want you, Chris! 559 00:20:16,078 --> 00:20:20,598 I think we just fundamentally don't understand each other, 560 00:20:20,648 --> 00:20:25,698 and we--we keep failing to communicate how we feel. 561 00:20:25,740 --> 00:20:27,480 - Nice. - Um----. 562 00:20:27,524 --> 00:20:29,314 Okay, I gotta go... 563 00:20:29,352 --> 00:20:31,662 jump on some calls. 564 00:20:33,835 --> 00:20:35,445 [laughs] I'm out of here. 565 00:20:35,489 --> 00:20:36,879 - Yeah, you're ready. - I'm out. 566 00:20:36,925 --> 00:20:38,135 - We're ready. - All right. 567 00:20:38,187 --> 00:20:40,097 Let's start right now. 568 00:20:41,103 --> 00:20:43,023 What are you doing walking around St. Poo-is? 569 00:20:43,061 --> 00:20:44,981 I literally just got poop on my hands 570 00:20:45,020 --> 00:20:46,330 from not having a bag. 571 00:20:46,369 --> 00:20:47,409 [upbeat music] 572 00:20:47,457 --> 00:20:48,627 Oh! 573 00:20:48,676 --> 00:20:49,756 Golf is the worst. 574 00:20:49,807 --> 00:20:50,767 Ah,----. 575 00:20:50,808 --> 00:20:52,328 Makes me want to throw a racket! 576 00:20:52,375 --> 00:20:53,895 I've been texting with JR. 577 00:20:53,942 --> 00:20:56,292 I'm entertaining the idea of hanging out with other guys. 578 00:20:56,336 --> 00:20:57,856 Are you an F-boy or a nice guy? 579 00:20:57,902 --> 00:20:59,162 I don't wanna say I'm a nice guy. 580 00:20:59,208 --> 00:21:00,338 That has the same connotations, right? 581 00:21:00,383 --> 00:21:01,563 That's a good answer. 582 00:21:01,602 --> 00:21:03,432 I've still never felt a feeling before. 583 00:21:03,473 --> 00:21:04,523 It sounds awesome. 584 00:21:04,561 --> 00:21:05,521 I like that you are saying 585 00:21:05,562 --> 00:21:07,092 you don't feel feelings. 586 00:21:07,129 --> 00:21:08,999 [laughs] Busted. 41862

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.