All language subtitles for The Mick S01E15 1080p Amazon WEB-DL DD+ 5.1 x264-TrollHD_track3_[eng]

She's inappropriate,
but in charge.

-She's The Mick.
-Can I have some more ice cream?

Oh! Aaah!

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BEN: And then the
monster ripped my guts out,

but I was still alive,
and then he started eating them

even though they smelled
like barf, but he didn't care.

And then I screamed for help,
but no one came,

and then he slipped in the barf,
and then I woke up.

W-Wait, I am confused.

Did it just smell like barf,

or was there actual barf?

Both.
Okay.
Oh.

Look, Ben, that sounds really
scary, I totally understand,

but you're just having
nightmares, you know?

Monsters aren't real.

It is real! One night,

he's gonna come
and finish the job,

and you'll be sorry.

Ay, Benny, come on.

Yeah, all good, bro. I-I get it.

For sure.

Hey, I'm sorry, too.

And listen, like...

Oh, totally, totally.

Dope, dope.

All right.

Peace.

Damn it.

Who was that?

My new lab partner, Dylan.

Dude's the freaking man.

And we've had
this amazing week together.

Just, you know,
crushing our lab reports,

farting in beakers.

Laughing
our freaking balls off.

Just vibing.

So you guys, like, a thing now?
(Alba and Mickey laugh)

I wish.
Being friends with this kid

would blast me
into a new social stratosphere.

Well, what's the problem?
You're the problem.

I invited him
to sleep over

and seal the deal,

but his stupid mom
won't let him.

How's that my fault?

Because everybody thinks

this is an unsupervised
trash house.

Unsupervised?
Yeah.

Are you kidding me?

I supervise.

Alba, did you know about this?

Oh, yeah, it is said often.

By many people.

Mm.
(stammering)

Well, I did not think you cared.

I-I thought you were proud
of your trash brand.

I don't care. But what's
the point of working my ass off

if nobody knows
I'm working my ass off?

'Cause it is a blessing, okay?

This place has been heaven
ever since these kids

got booted from the system.

What system?

Ay, the system
where you take someone's kid,

you give their parents
the night off.

Then the next weekend,

they return the favor.

And round and round it goes.

That sounds amazing.

Not for me it wasn't.
Poodle would pop her pills

while Alba was left to scrub the
urine from the sleeping bags.

Hold on a second,
so these parents are cool

with a pillhead watching
their kids but not me?

Oh, hell no.

These Greenwich turds
are gonna show me

the respect I deserve.
What does that mean?

It means you're gonna
sleep with that boy.

(indistinct chatter)

There she is.
That's Dylan's mom.

And that's Dylan.

Keep it in your pants
and follow my lead.

'Sup, D-Money?

Oh, Mint Chocolate Chip.

What's good, playboy?

Chip, are you
forgetting something?

Your raw yogurt with bee pollen.

You know
what I always say.

When we feed our brains,
our minds can get to work.

Right, totally.

You're never not saying that.

Hi there, uh, I'm
Chip's Aunt Mackenzie.

I'm Karen, Dylan's mom.

Oh, my goodness, I am so happy

to finally meet you.

Chip here is just head over
heels for your little Dylan.

Aunt Mackenzie.

Yeah?
Can Dylan sleep over tonight?

MICKEY:
Oh, Chip, I do know

you have a history
paper due on Monday.

I already wrote it.

Well, you saying there's
no room for improvement?

Why, I have all day Sunday.
Wh-What about church?

I could do it after.
I don't see how that

leaves room for puzzle
hour at the senior center.
Please.

Mm-hmm. Yep, ye-- okay.

Well, it has to be okay
with Dylan's mom.

Oh, Mom, can I, please?

Oh, I don't think so,
sweetheart.

It's no offense,
I just don't know you very well.

Absolutely, no offense taken.
I'm the exact same way.

Come on, we'll be
good. I promise.

Well...

My husband is out of town,
and I'm kind of short-handed.

Honestly, it's perfectly fine.

Just let me take him
off your hands.

Run a bubble bath, slug down
a bottle of... of, uh,

a glass, have a glass
of wine. You know?

That does sound nice.
Yeah.

Okay, what the heck?

Totes.
I guess it's all right.

I just have a few guidelines.

No dairy, no refined
sugar, no gluten.

For a cool kid,

this guy comes with a
lot of instructions.

Yeah, he's a nerd.

Hey, Alba, just the woman
I wanted to see.

Okay, I'm gonna need you

to fill the essential oil
diffuser in Dylan's humidifier.

Ooh, no can do.

I am Poodling tonight.

What?
And it says "No heavy
machinery," so...

No... Damn you.

I mean, look at all this crap.

Whoa.

What's that for?

That's an adrenaline shot.

That's to bring Dylan back
from the dead in the event

he finds himself
in the same room as a peanut.

God. I love a good sleepover.

You know? The bonding,
the secrets, the pranks.

I guarantee you,

someone gets this jammed
in their ass tonight.

All right. This is an
important night for me.

I don't need Dylan going
home and telling his mom

he was sharing secrets

and jamming asses with
a strange grown man.

In fact, take Ben to bed.

All right.
What about the monster?

Buddy.
(sighs)

If you encounter any monsters
tonight, tell you what,

just dream up some ice picks,
you know?

And stab him in his face a
bunch of times. Sound good?

Yeah.
Okay.
(retches)

Ooh!

Swoopy bang brothers.

Good to see you guys.

Hey, Dylan,

did you want your fish oils now,
or did you want to wait

and have them with your ginseng
and milk-thistle lozenges?

You don't have to actually
do all that stuff.

My mom's
kind of crazy.

Well, no... no crazier than me.

Right, Chip? I'm, like,
the craziest mom in town.

You're not a mom.
Well, I'm strict as hell.

And I'm crossing every single
item off of this list.

Including... no cell
phones after 8:00.

Thank you.

(quietly): Dude, I thought
you said she was chill.

Well, she is, just...

Mickey, a word?

Hmm?

Listen, I kind of told
Dylan you were chill,

so I'm gonna need you to go
ahead and be chill, you feel me?

Yeah, I feel you. Yeah.

Here you go, buddy, go nuts.

You're kidding, right?
I gave you $200.

Yeah, you're gonna want
to learn to bribe better.

That's about as crazy
as it's gonna get tonight.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, missy.

Where do you think you're going?

None of your business, jackass.

Whoa! Wha... That's no way
to talk to your superior.

That will be one...
demerit for you.

Okay, whatever you're doing,
stop it.

I'm going to study at Kylie's.

Good, good.

Go study. Study hard.

School is very
important to me, Dylan.

You'll want to tell your mom
that. Tell all the moms.

Screw this. Come on, homie.

Let's go kick it in my dojo.

(snoring)

(man speaking Spanish
on television)

JIMMY:
Oh...

First one asleep.

Sorry, Alba.

Rules are rules.

Dylan, time for your melatonin
tea, and then lights out.

CHIP:
Just a second.

Come on,
hurry up.

What's going on in there?
(chuckles)

You know we don't lock
the doors in this house.

(bumping, clattering)

Hurry.
I am.

Smells like lip balm
and cigarettes in here.

(clattering, coughing)

I can explain.

(giggles)

Who's this?

I'm Olivia.

Who the hell are you?

(laughs)

Where the hell did this chick
come from?
She's Dylan's girlfriend.

She showed up
like this, I swear.

That's, like, a $500 bottle
of cognac.
It tastes like ass.

Well, you look like ass.

Give that to me.
Please don't
tell my mom.

Okay, she'll freak
if she finds out.
(doorbell rings)

Okay, just, you...
Don't move.

I am not done
with you two.

(laughing)

Get off the bed.
No.

Hey. Can I help you?

I'm sorry to bother you; I'm
looking for my daughter Olivia.

Is she here?

Uh, Olivia, no.

No, nobody here
by that name.

Yeah, sorry about that.

Uh, please, please.

She raided my liquor cabinet
and snuck out.

I tracked the GPS on
my phone to this house.

Can you just check for me?

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, of course I can.
Excuse me.

Chip!

It's your girlfriend.
This is your house.

Oh, well, at least
she was drinking

on a full stomach-- real good.

Okay, Olivia's dad's downstairs.

He tracked her phone here.

What? What-What
are we gonna do?

Wh-Wh-Whoa, whoa, whoa,
just relax, milk thistle, okay?

We don't have a lot of time.

Now, who else knows she's here?

Just us.
Okay, great.

So get on her phone
and delete anything

that traces her
back to the house.

Text messages,
pictures, whatever.

Jimmy!
It's locked.

Yeah, so wipe the puke off her
thumb and unlock it. Jimmy!

What...
What the hell is this?

"Come over to Chip's house."
No, wait, dude, hold on.

"We can use his room
to make out."
No, n-no, it's
not like that.

"I think he might be
in love with me."
Dude, dude, dude.

You're reading that
totally out of context.

"He's trying to impress me

by sniffing his own farts."

Bro, I thought you
thought it was funny.

I did, I thought it
was mad funny, dude,

but you kept doing it
and it got weird.

Forget you-- let's
feed him to the wolves.

All right, no...
Please do not feed
me to the wolves.

No one's gonna be feeding
anybody to the wolves.

All right?
This is my one shot

to get into the system,

and you guys are not gonna
blow it for me-- understood?

Oh... that is gross
but excellent.
I know.

What? No, no, no,
no, I know, no.

I'm gonna draw on her.
I know you want
to draw on her,

but you can't 'cause
her dad's downstairs.

He traced her here
through her phone,

like come kind of freakin'
CIA agent.

I need you to take the phone
and get it as far away

from this house as possible.

Mischief.
I like it.

Just keep him on the move
long enough for us

to get his daughter home safely.

Done.
Okay. Oh...

Epic night.
Jimmy!

Yeah?

You want to take the phone?

Oh, yeah.
I was so excited.

You got excited, I know.
I'm, like, halfway.

I know you are.
Dylan, you start mopping up.

Chip? You ever want to have
anybody over to the house again,

come with me.

Hey, yeah, so she's not here.

(sighs)

But my nephew did want
to tell you something.

Go ahead, Chip.

Olivia was here,
but she's gone now.

(sighs) Did she say
where she was going?

I don't know, it was kind
of hard to understand her.

She was really liquored up.

Oh, God, not again.

Yeah, it kind of seemed
like she wanted to hook up.

I mean, I wasn't even
attracted to her,

'cause I like
confident women...

Knock it off, knock it off.
That'll do.

So sorry about
your daughter.

And we do hope you find her.

But wait, wait, wait.
It says right here...

She's on the move.
Oh?

I'm sorry, I've got to go.
CHIP:
All right.

It's cool, good luck, yeah.
Hope you find her.

I mean...

Is he gone?
MICKEY:
Yeah, for now.

We've got to move fast.

Okay, Chip,
open it up.

What? Not the trunk.
You trying to get me crucified?

I'm sorry, I've never held a...

(retching)
Oh!

Oh, my God.
Okay.

I thought she got it all
out in the living room.

My bad. Trunk it is.
We're not going too far.

Come on.

(panting)

Yeah.

Do a water and a beer.

Mischief.

(sighs):
Yeah.

(sighs):
Yeah.

(panting)

(ringtone): * 'Cause it feels
so good to be bad *

* I don't even try to be,
but it's all right... *

You son of a bitch.

Oh.

Oh.

All right, you know,
I can explain this.

Aunt Mickey,
I had a nightmare.

Aunt Mickey?

Hello?

Anybody there?

Where are you guys?
(footstep splats)

He's here. He's here.
He's here. (gasps)

Alba.

Alba.

Alba, wake up!

There's a monster in the house!

Wake up.

Alba!

(gurgling)
Where is she?

Where is she?!

(grunts)

What are you doing
with my daughter's phone?!

I don't know.

(groans)

I just found it,
all right?

Pack of girls comes in
here like Coyote Ugly,

and one of
'em drops it.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God, I'm sorry.

What have I done?

I'm just...

I'm scared to death
about my daughter.

(groans)

How old is she?

She's 14.

Yeah, that's about the time
they start going nuts.

Their whole system
down there is

firing off
God knows when.

They got every magazine cover
telling them they're ugly,

uncomfortable shoes
and lotions and creams.

Too much, for everybody.

You're a dad, too?

Oh... yeah, big-time.

18, 14 and seven.

Seven was a surprise.

My wife had her tubes tied,
but my guys busted through.

I'm sorry I kicked
your ass like that.

Yeah, you didn't really
kick my ass, all right?

You just... you got
a drop on me.

Thank you.

You just drive...
just drive safe.

(door closes)

(groaning)

Come on, this chick is heavy.

She's got, like, a
million freakin' keys.

There's a car coming!
Okay last one,

and we're tossing
her in the bushes.

Oh, you got
lucky, bitch.

(Olivia coughing)

Oh, come on, Chip.

I thought she was
gonna yak on me.

You and the backstabber
take over from here.

Dude, I'm sorry, okay?
(grunts)

I-I only said those things
to make Olivia laugh.

Oh, so I'm like
a joke to you now.

All right, fine.
I'll admit it, at first,

we just needed
a place to hook up.

But then I really
started to like you.

Okay, so now you're using me
for my trash house?

Hey! Stop calling it that, okay?
It's a mansion.

All right, come on,
as if you weren't using me

for my popularity.

It wasn't
like that, Dylan.

It was always about you.

Can't we just be homies again?

I wish we could, but it's
a little too late for that now.

Okay, can you guys
either fight or kiss

or just shut the
hell up, please?

(door closes,
footsteps approaching)

(whispers):
Someone's home.

Okay, hide, hide, hide.
Where?

Uh, here.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Shh, shh, shh. Shh!

MICKEY:
Ouch!

Oh, Olivia. Thank God.

DYLAN (whispering):
Oh, God, the jig is up.

We're so toast.
Shh.

If he sees us, he's within
his rights to shoot us.

If you guys don't shut up,
I'm gonna shoot you.

You scared the hell
out of me tonight, kiddo.

Look, I know I haven't
always been the best father,

but you have got to cool it
with this behavior.

She's damaged goods.

I want a freakin'
grilled cheese.

God, that sounds good.
I'm starving.

Shh.

Just get some rest.

(sighs)

We'll talk about it
in the morning.

(footsteps receding)

(sighs)
Shh.

Better tell your mom

I was like a freaking
prison warden.

(doorbell rings)
(gasps)

Shh.

Shh, shh.

(doorbell rings)

Shh.

Hello.

DYLAN: Mom?
(door closes)

Damn it, Dylan, your mom
tracked your phone here.

My-my phone doesn't
have tracking.

Then what's she doing here?

DON:
You would not believe

the night I've had.

Poor baby.

Let me make it all better.

(Karen and Don moaning)

(gasping)
Shh.

(Karen and Don laughing)

This... is... awesome.

Alba, wake up!

(screaming)

(screaming)

Monster!

Benito!

(shouting)

Oh, no.

(grunts)

Oh, no. That's not good.

No. Ugh!

Benito!

Oh, no!

Where you go?!

(chuckles)
All right, guys.

Yo, check this out.

(Karen and Don sigh)

Better?

So much better.

(laughs)

(Karen sighs)

For what it's worth, your mom's
got a pretty rocking body.

Chip, shut up.

Oh!

Don is live

and uncut.

Gross.
DON: How'd you get away, anyway?

Dylan's spending the night
at his friend Chip's.

Chip Pemberton?

Short little toad, red hair?

KAREN:
Yeah.

I think he's in love
with Dylan or something.

DON: I was at his house
earlier looking for Olivia.

He didn't say anything
about Dylan being there.

That's weird.

DON: Olivia was pretty hammered
when she got home, too.

Come on.

That's it.
I'm calling right now.

(phone vibrating)

No, no, no, no.

That bitch just
hung up on me.

I'm driving over there.
Right now?

What? Come on.

Bye. Thank you.

All right, mom of the year's
got a head start,

so we got to hurry.
Go, go, go.

I don't want to alarm you,
but we hit anything below dog,

and we're not stopping.

(engine revving)

You guys go upstairs.
She's gonna be here soon.

What's this?
Aunt Mickey!

The monster's real
and it's scary!

(groans)
He either wants to

drown me in his barf

or skin me alive with his claws!
I know.

It's okay, it's okay,
don't worry, don't worry.

Listen, I know you're upset,
and you're scared of the monster

and I'm sorry, but I've
told you a hundred times,

they're not real, okay?

So you don't...

(groaning):
Benito...
(screams)

Oh!

Alba? Oh.

You don't come creeping up
behind someone...

(doorbell rings)
Coming!

Here you go. You see?
That's all you got to do.

Karen? Hey. Oh.
Dylan?

Come on in.

Is, um, s-something
the matter?

I called, but
no one answered.

I know. Oh, gosh.

The-the reception's
real spotty.

(scoffs)
You know.

Oh, hey, Mom.
What are you doing here?

Well, I was worried, but...

...looks like
everything is okay.

CHIP:
Evening, Ms. Sherman.

Mm-hmm.
Got a real glow about you.

What is that?

What?

Did you not read the list?

Oh.

I was very clear.

No phone after 8:00.

MICKEY:
Yeah, I know.

No, the thing is
I-I did read the list.

Right? I read the list.
Yeah.

Yeah, I just must have
forgotten that one.

You just missed that one?
(chuckles)

I'm sorry, but that's
not gonna fly with me.

Huh. Yeah, gosh.

Just seems like a pretty small
thing in the whole scheme

of what could've
gone wrong tonight, you know?

Dylan, we're leaving.

What? Mom, stop.

Hush. I trusted this woman,

despite her reputation,

and she has betrayed
Mommy's trust.

Oh, hmm. Just like
you betrayed Dad's?

Mm-kay, ginseng, you sure
you know what you're doing here?

What?

Uh, I know about
you and Don.

How?

I-It doesn't matter how, Karen!

'Cause I freaking
know everything!

So why don't you mind your own

little messed up life

and butt out of mine?

(doorbell rings)

(chuckles):
Okay.

Excuse me.

I'm gonna get that.

But is it just me,
or do you feel like

I'm not the worst parent
in the room?

(laughs)

(exhales)

(chuckles)

(dance music playing,
girls laughing)

(car door closes,
Sabrina snoring)

MICKEY: Hmm.
GIRL: Good night, princess!

No idea who that is.
(car drives off, girls whooping)

Come on, Dylan.

We're leaving.

Listen, I'm sorry
I've been such a jerk, man.

Water under the bridge.

I'm sorry you had
to see your mom naked.

That's got to be pretty intense.

Yeah. Yeah, it was, but...

hey, at least I came out of it
with a homie, right?

For sure, brah.

(groans)

Oh, Chip 'n Dip,
by the way, next week,

sleepover at my house,
all right?

For sure, D-Train.

All right,
word to Big Bird, bro.

Okay.

All in all, I think that's
one for the win column, huh?

We are totally in the
system, my friend.

And I totally
bagged Dylan.

I wish you could
hear yourself.

(groans)

Want to bring her inside?

No. I don't
feel like it.

Morning.

Morning.

(Mickey snoring)

(exhales)

(Mickey continues snoring)

SABRINA:
None of your business, jackass.

Now that you've gotten
to know The Mick,

here are a few more shows
to check out
from Fox.

We are in the heart
of one of the world's
most remote jungles

deep in the South Pacific.

Along with ten
tough survivalists

from all walks of life.

But they don't quite know
what they're in for yet.

Surviving this game
will be the hardest thing
that you have ever done

because you won't be
paired with each other.

You'll be paired...
with these guys.

(all cheering)
WOMAN: Hi!

Ten total novices
who have never spent a night
camping in their own backyard,

let alone surviving
in the wilderness.

Oh, boy.

So we've "game-ified" surviving
in the wild.

(whimpering)
So that is like
the first big challenge,

right, for these novices--

just staying alive.

-(shouting)
-(screaming)

(laughing)

-Aaah!
-Are you okay?

SIMONE: They have to learn how
to make fire and to get food.

(screaming)

And then,
with their teammate,

they go on to the challenges
that we've prepared for them.

MAN: If you love action,
you're gonna see contestants

propelling down waterfalls.

If you love drama,

you're gonna see
relationships forming

and romances forming
in the reality
that we're shooting.

And if you love humor,
you're gonna see
this incredible humor

of these people that really
don't belong in the jungle
trying to survive out here.

So they have to survive
each other and the jungle
and the game.

(buzzing)

(animals chirping, tweeting)