All language subtitles for The Mick S01E06 1080p Amazon WEB-DL DD+ 5.1 x264-TrollHD_track3_[eng]

She's inappropriate,
but in charge.

-She's The Mick.
-Can I have some more ice cream?

Oh! Aaah!

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-That's attractive.
-Why would they--

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*

(swishing wine)

(gentle piano music playing)

Yeah.

Yeah.
Mm-hmm.

That's the one.
Yeah?

Uh-huh.
Thank you.

Jimmy, I got to tell you,
this place is awesome.

How'd you find it?

Oh, that's a funny
story, actually.

I was driving to work...

Eh. You don't have a job.

Okay. Fine.

I was driving to the
store, and this...

Well, now I feel like
you're lying.

Hey, could you just
listen, please?
Okay. Yeah.

All right. Fine.
I'm driving somewhere.

Okay. Good enough.

And this greasy goombah...

Okay. Geez, Jimmy.

It's an Italian restaurant.
Lower your voice.

Oh, sorry.

Okay. This greasy goombah

cuts me off out
of nowhere, right?
Yeah.

Okay, so I start
following him.

And I'm yelling at him
to pull over, right?

Then he pulls into
a parking lot.

I jump out. I grab
the tire iron.

I'm gonna tune him up.
Hmm.

And then it hits me.

This smell.

And I'm like,
"That's good.

That's, like,
real good."
Oh.

So I forget the goombah,
and I run in here,

and I put my name down
with the doorwoman.

The hostess?
I don't know, Mick.
The broad in the front.

Oh.

Well, that is,
uh, yeah.

That's quite a story. Okay.
Oh, yeah, yeah.

All right. Well, uh, look,

regardless of how we got here,
I'm having a really good time.

It's really nice of you.
Thanks.

Yeah? Well, you know, still got
a little speed on my fastball.

Guess so.
Yeah.

For the lady,
the spaghetti bolognese.

Thank you.

And for you,
the veal scalloppini.
Geez.

Yeah.
Buon appetito.
Wow.

Buon appetito.

Oh, my God, Jimmy.

Do you see how beautiful
my spaghetti is?

Yeah, I've never seen anything
like that in my life.

You know what?
I don't care if it's douchey.

I'm-a take a picture
of this spaghetti.

Yeah, document it.
I'm not judging.
Yeah.

I'm going to.

Yeah.

Get it real good.

Say "cheese."

(gasps)
Oh!

Mick.

I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
What the hell?!

I thought it would be funny
and ruin the photo, okay?

How was that funny, Jimmy?!

I was gonna
scramble the noodle,

flip a meatball or something.

What?
I didn't mean to ruin the dress

or the night, okay?

Turn around!
(groans)

I'm sorry.
All right.
You know what?

Just get up.
We're going.

No. Stop, stop, stop.
Sit down.

I am leaving now.

Hey. That's $40
worth of spaghetti.

Well, enjoy your date
with your spaghetti.

I'm taking the car
and going home.

Okay, Mick, come here.
Sit down! Mick.

Come on. S...
Ah, screw it.

Oh, that's hot!

Hot! Hot! Oh! Oh!

(muffled grunting)

(choking)

Mick! Help!

Seriously?
(gasping)

Will someone do something?

(patrons gasping)
You okay?

There you go.

Did you have that in your hand
the whole time?

A gentleman never
abandons his drink.

(sighs)

Teddy Grant.

Mm.

We're through, Jimbo.

Then he invited me
to dinner on his boat.

(chuckles)

There's nothing
more suspicious than a man

who can't live on land.

Well, I'll make do. Jimmy
used to live in a car.

Ooh, bum to a pirate. You're
really moving up in the world.

You're dating a pirate?

Does he have a hook?

No. He doesn't have a hook, Ben.

Because he's not a pirate.

Teddy Grant is a very sexy,
sophisticated gentleman.

What? Hold on. Teddy Grant?

Yeah. Why? What's wrong?
Is he a diddler or something?

That's dude is the heir
to a family in Greenwich

that has been around
since the Revolutionary War.

That boat

is a 90-foot yacht.

Ah! Really?

Is it a joke? Are you joking?

This isn't time for jokes.

He is insanely
out of your league.

He's not out of my league.
What are you talking about?

Eh, he's old money,
I'm new money.

You're no money.

ALBA:
Well, I'm just happy

you finally find
a man you deserve.

You wasted too much time

on that trash bag, Jimmy.
Yeah.

(phone buzzing, Chip groans)

This number keeps
hammer-calling me.

What?!

Wait a minute.

Hello?

You guys, it's Mom and Dad!

BEN: Mommy!
What?
Dad!

Mom?
Poodle!
Dad.

Hey, Dad, can you hear me?
(static crackling)

CHRISTOPHER (distorted): Be
still, Fernando. We shouldn't...

POODLE: ...disgusting.
Daddy!

Mother!

Chip, shut up!
We can't hear them.

POODLE:
Shouldn't even be...

CHRISTOPHER:
Plain at the...

POODLE: Go bag in the...
(beep)

They're safe!

They called us
to let us know

that they're okay.

SABRINA: They didn't
call us, you idiot.

That was a butt dial.

Okay. It has to
mean something,

because my number
was in their phone.

You know what it means?
It means that they could've

been calling us this whole
time, but they haven't.

How do you call somebody
with your butt?

Okay, Benito, come on.
I think we go somewhere else.

Thanks, Alba.

All right. Guys, listen.

I recognize that this
is a really big deal.

But I got to figure out
an appropriate thing to wear

for a boat date.

Okay, Benito.

Don't pay any attention to them.

How about if I put
on a fun time kid's program?

(gasps) Annoying Orange!
Annoying Orange!

Annoying Orange!
Yeah, that
is definitely annoying.

Okay. Here you go, Benito.

Go on.

There you go.

Okay. Hmm.

*

TEDDY:
So here's a bunch

of dials and switches.
But I'm not gonna bore you

with what they all do.

Do you know what they do

or you got a guy for that?

I know exactly what they do.

I'm just kidding.
I got a guy for that.

(laughs)

And this is the bedroom.

Hmm.

(chuckles)

Mm.
Ooh!

You okay?
Yeah. I just get a little
seasick sometimes. It's fine.

I have something for that.

Oh, yeah?
You know, when you spend
as much time on a yacht

as I do, you tend
to become immune

to those things.
Mm-hmm.

Mm. Oh.

I can get you some water.
Thank you.

You know, I've got to say,
I've never seen anyone

get seasick
on a docked boat before...

Whoa! No!

Hmm?

You just drink that whole thing?

I mean, there's a little bit

left in the bottom
if you want it.

No. No. You're only
supposed to drink

a capful of this thing.
Do you want to sit down?

Oh, no.

Don't you worry about me.
I can handle my medicine.

(cackles)

Oh, hello, sir!

Where did you come from?

(laughs)
This guy'll be like,

(high-pitched voice):
"I miss my family! Put me back!"

Well...
Oh, God!

It's so gross, though,

you know, when you touch it.

Ooh!
Uh, you know, I could,

I could hold off,
I could hold off for a minute.

Maybe you should
hold off a minute.

(both laugh)

Believe this guy?
Okay, okay.

(laughs)

Hey, can I tell you a secret?

Okay. Here's my secret.

Okay.

Normally, I'd be
all over this deck,

just riding your brains out.

But I like you. I think there's
something sweet about you.

And so I want
to take it slow. Okay?

Okay. Yeah.
Slow, slow-- Okay.

(laughing): You don't need that.
Yeah. No, I do, I do, yes.

Slow is good.
Slow is really...

Why don't you have a seat?
Yeah! Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'll take this.

Um...
I'll take this guy.

Look, um...

Mickey, I like you.

And-and I want
to let you know that

I'm-I'm going away for a bit.

Yeah.

I'm, I'm going
to America's Cup.

It's a sailing race.

Yeah.
Look, I leave in three days.

I'm gonna be gone
for a couple months.
Okay.

Okay.
Okay.

Yeah. Um...

Me, too.

Should I get you some water?

Mm-mm!

I'm good.

You good?
Yeah.

All right, I'm gonna
get you some water.
It's good. No, no, no!

No. All's good.
Yeah?

You know what? I'm just gonna
take a quick mosey around,

find the place
where ladies go pee-pee.

I'll be back in one second.

It's actually inside.
Uh...

(screams, water splashes)

Oh, my God.
(screams)

Mickey, are you okay?

Oh, uh, whoopsie. Oh.

Oh, you guys.

I made a real ass out of myself.

And he's leaving in three days.

No. Do not give up, Miss Mickey.

You cannot got back to Jimmy

and his smells.
I can't wait

till Mom and Dad get back home
so I don't have to listen

to these inane conversations
anymore.

They are not coming home.

How can you say that?

Hey, guys, come on.
We got to stick together.

I know this is a really tough
situation.

It's not a tough situation.
It's very straightforward.

They're not coming
back. Okay? (scoffs)

What are we even talking about?

You know what? I'm moving
into their bedroom.

No frickin' way.
Well, hold-hold on.

Don't go crazy. You're not
moving into my bedroom.

(laugh) Oh. Obviously not.
Your bedroom is gross.

I'm taking the master.

I thought I was in the master.

(laughing):
Oh! Mickey.

This is the master.

MICKEY:
What?! Where has this been?

SABRINA: Well, maybe you should
broaden your horizons

beyond your bedroom
and the refrigerator.

Oh, I'm-a rip Teddy
to shreds in here.

Nobody's ripping anybody
to shreds in here.

Okay? Get away from that!
Put that down.

And take
your frickin' shoes off.

Or what? You'll tell Mom?

I'll take them off for you.

Why don't I just tell Mom
myself? Hey, Mom?

I'm getting mud all over
your carpet. Do you mind?

Oh. Guess not.

Don't touch that drawer. Okay?
Don't touch her jewelry!

Don't even look at it. You're
playing a dangerous game, woman.

Oh, is Little Orphan Annie
getting mad?

Oh, oh.

Okay. Okay. Okay.
Everybody relax.

We don't need to scream at each
other in front of your brother.

(dramatic music playing
on tablet)

(woman screaming)

I've had about
enough of this.

You guys are trespassing.

You know what?
He's got a good point.

You guys are trespassing.
Please go.

Yeah. That's cute.
I'm the oldest Pemberton.

This room is mine.

Well, I'm your leader.
So this room is mine.

Yeah. Well,
I'm the man of the house,

and I say no one gets it.

You already have a room.

Hmm, my room sucks.
I'm gonna take this one.

Well, Mom and Dad are coming
home, and I can prove it.

"Well, Mom and Dad are coming
home, and I can prove it."

I'm serious.
I have hard evidence.

What are you talking about?

I record all my phone calls.

What?

Creepy.

Is it? Is it creepy

to be ahead of everybody
at all times?

Yeah.
Definitely.

No.

All righty.

Okay.

How much time
did you spend on that?

More time than you've spent
on anything in your life.

First, we will listen
to this call as a group.

Second, we will isolate
each and every noise

that we hear.
Oh, my God. Just play it.

CHIP: If I don't get that
sports channel bundle,

I'm suing your family...
Okay. All right.

All right, that's different.
That's different.

Let's, um...

Let's refocus.

Okay?

SABRINA: Mom?
MICKEY: Poodle.
CHIP: Dad.

CHRISTOPHER: I will...
CHIP: Hey, Dad, can you hear me?

CHRISTOPHER:
Please tell Fernando we...

CHIP:
Daddy! Mother!

SABRINA:
Chip, shut up.

We can't hear them.

POODLE:
We shouldn't even be...

CHRISTOPHER: Plain at...
(goose squawks)

POODLE:
It's... go bag in the...

Okay.

So what did we hear?

I heard a sad little boy
whose mommy doesn't love him.

I heard the honk
of a goose.

I think it was
the honk of a horn.

You're actually both right.

There was a goose honk
and a foghorn.

Also, the words "Fernando,"
"plane," and "go-bag."

Now, I did some research,
and most of the world's

major ports with native geese
are in South America,

which lines up with Fernando.

And where did Mom and Dad go
on their honeymoon?

Chile.

So you think Mom and Dad
are in Chile?

No. But they were.

But between go-bags and plane,

I think Fernando
smuggled them out of Chile

and is bringing them home.

MICKEY:
Okay.

I guess that settles it.

I'm moving into the master.

So I think this new bedroom
will be a good thing

for you and ocean man Teddy.

I don't know, Alba.
I told you,

I went full beast mode
on our date.

I'm not sure he's into it.

But you've come so far
from that tragedy man Jimmy.

You must try.

You really hate Jimmy, huh?

He is dog.

All right. Well, I don't know
what you want me to do.

You need to bring Teddy up
to the boom-bang room,

and you need... just... and...

and then... and then...

Oh... (teeth clatter)

You know, seal the deal.

Yeah. I want all of that.
Hmm.

But I don't know what
I'm supposed to do.

He hasn't called me.
Well, then, call him.

Me call him?
Have you lost your mind?

Oh. I know, I know.

You can, uh,
by accident, call him.

You know, you
put the phone

by the butt.

It makes the call.

Like Christopher and Poodle did.

The old butt-dial.

Butt-dial, yeah.

Hmm.

I don't know, Mickey.
This is a bit intense.

Okay, maybe this is not
the time to be subtle.

It's too late now.
Just come on.

Thanks again for
waxing my bikini line,

like you do every
single week, Marta.

Sure. You are my
favorite waxing client.

You make this job
an absolute joy.

Oh, by the way,
how did the date go?

Well, not great.
Thanks for asking.

I think I was just
really nervous.

It didn't help that I was so
exhausted from all those Kegels.

Sure. Well, your hard work
has paid off,

because in over 30 years
in this business,

I have never seen a more
perfect downstairs on a lady.

Hm. Thanks, Marta.

It is so soft,
and young and supple,

like the neck of a turkey.

Ooh... ooh...

I-I mean, it's just that
I wish Teddy could find it

in his heart to give me
a second chance.

That's mine! That's mine!
(coughs)

I swallowed a frog.
(clears throat)

I wish I could... Teddy could
find it in his heart

to give me a second chance.
(whispers inaudibly)

Anyway, uh, thanks
for letting me

pour my heart out
to you, Marta.

I love you equally as
a friend and an employee.

Sure. And I love listening
to your many, many problems.

I...
I want to squeeze you
around your neck

until you can't
breathe anymore.
I just...

So you thought saying that

it resembled the neck
of a turkey would be...

They are majestic animals.

I can't even wrap my mind
around what that means.

In my country,
it's a real high compliment.

Is that what... Oh!
(cell phone ringing)

(screams)
Oh, oh!

Shut up! Shut up!
Shut up! Shut up!

Hello?

Oh, hey, stranger.

(laughing)

God, I'm still so embarrassed
about the butt dial.

Sorry about that.

It's a shame I'm going so soon.

Yeah. It really is.
It really is.

I think we're just gonna have
to kick things up a notch.

What happened
to taking things slowly?

Oh, that? No.

That was, that was so stupid.

I said that forever ago,
when I was young and dumb.

But I'm not that anymore.

Now I'm old and wise.

Hmm, no, not old.

(laughs)
I'm wise.

And young and hot.

Guess what?

What?

I just got dibs on a brand-new
master bedroom

that I didn't even know existed.

I don't know what that means,
but... I'm in.

Oh, come on.

What the hell do you think
you're doing?

Settling in.
Oh, I'm sorry.

Did I forget
to take my shoes off?

(yells)

Oh... my God!

Show some respect!

(grunting)

Idiot.

(grunts)
(yells)

(glass shatters)

No face shots.

(screams)

(grunts)

That was my face,
you... (grunts)

(grunting)

(slow, distorted shouting)

(grunting)

I'm going to kill you.
I'll kill you more.

(slow, distorted grunting)

(slow, distorted grunting)

SABRINA: You like that?
Remind you of Mommy, Chip?

(muffled):
Alba! (screams)

(muffled):
Alba! Alba!

(muffled): No! Come back!
That's right, come here.

(muffled screams)

(grunts)

(groans)

(screaming)
(yelling)

Well, if it isn't
the two little pigs.

They wrote a story
about you guys.

That's the three little pigs.

Oh. Well, you're the expert.

Who are they?

Why, are you jealous?

(laughs)

(grunts)
Oh!

(grunts)
(glass shatters)

Hey, hey!
All right! Stop it!

What are you doing?

Okay, Chip.
Chip.
What the hell?

Hey, you guys stop it
right now!
Oh, my God. No.

(grunting)
Whoa, hey,
knock it off.

Walk away!
I'll kill you!

(slow, distorted shouting)

(grunting)

(yells)

CHIP:
Oh, my God.

Oh, my God,
I think I killed her.

(screams):
Sabrina!

(high-pitched crying)

(slow, distorted shouting)

Oh! Oh, okay,
okay, okay, okay.

No, no, just...

(screams)

Oh, no.
What did you do?

I didn't mean to do it.
I didn't mean it!

Pull it out!
Alba!

No, no, no. Bed, bed, bed.
Go away.

You get out of here.
You shouldn't see this.

(whimpering)

(both screaming)

(screaming)

Cool.
(screaming continues)

Okay, I think he'd like me
to travel with him.

So I can operate... I can
operate this, I can do it.

Okay. You are really...

Get that woman
away from me!

Uh, just call me. If they...

Uh...
(whimpering)

If they give you
a glass eye, you just...
Get away!

Get away!
Okay. Okay. I'll wait for you.

Sorry. All right,
good luck. You call me.

We'll do a rain check. Okay?
(Teddy cries out)

(breathing heavily)

(phone buzzing)

Damn it, they called again
when we were fighting.

Oh, just play it.

(phone beeps)

(passionate moaning over phone)
Oh, my God, is that...?

Fast forward.
Fast forward.

POODLE:
Oh, so overweight.

CHRISTOPHER:
Well, you're an alcoholic.

Is that to-go bag with that
salad still in the fridge?

POODLE:
Oh, God. You just ate a pizza.

CHRISTOPHER:
Well, it was very plain.

I'm calling downstairs
to the front desk.

POODLE: Can't you just
leave them alone?

CHRISTOPHER:
What are you talking about?

Fernando loves me.
(phone beeps)

Maybe they're trying to
tell us something in code?

Chip.

Why couldn't they just call
and tell us that they miss us?

You know what?
Screw them. Okay?

I'm here.

You're right.
Screw them.

You should take the room.

Nah, I'm good.

Hey. You looking for Chris
and Poodle Pemberton?

This is a direct line. Enjoy.

(dramatic music,
screaming)

Ben, are you watching Alien?

Oh, come on, man.

Aliens is a way
better movie.

I didn't know.
(scoffs)

Jimmy, we're watching Aliens.
I'll show you.

Give me that.

That is gonna put me
in a weird space, but okay.

You'll be all right.

All right, you guys.

Here.
Thanks.

(grumbles)

CHIP (recording):
Hey, Jen. It's Chip. (chuckles)

Just calling to see what's up.

MAN (recording):
Chip, this is Jennifer's dad.

This is the 76th consecutive day
you've called her.
Oh.

It's getting scary.
(both chuckling)

I need you to never,
ever call again.

Mm.
(phone chimes)

Incoming call.
Okay.

Ignore it and trace
the voice mail.

(beeps)

CHIP (recording):
You've reached Chip Pemberton.

Please leave a message.

CHRISTOPHER:
Hey, buddy. It's Dad.

I've got to make this fast.

I'm so sorry
we haven't been in touch,

but it's very dangerous
for us to call.

Look, I wish I could be there
for your lacrosse games.

I hope that bonehead coach

is giving you the playing time
you deserve.

Anyway, I need you to be brave
for me, son.

We don't know
when we can come home,

but your mom and I care about
you kids more than anything.

We'll fix this, Chip.

We love you.
Mm.

Did you get it?
(beeping)

Got 'em.

Captioning sponsored by
20TH CENTURY FOX TELEVISION

CHIP:
Chile.

Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org

My name is Eric Carter.

Whatever you think
you know about me...
you don't.

Eric. Bin-Khalid's
people found us.

They're coming for you next.

-(phone rings)
-Carter. Where are you?

We're blown.

This is payback.

Killing the Rangers
is only the beginning.

These codes go out,
they launch attacks
all over the country.

WOMAN: Thousands could die.

Carter was the youngest
squad leader in the history
of the Rangers.

He doesn't fail.

Go, go! Go, go, go!

My name is Eric Carter.

Do you two have any idea
what this number is?

-Last night's winning Lotto.
-The number of cats
in your apartment.

It's the amount of money
you two cost the city
working together for three days.

You've been on the job 25 years.
Not a nick on you.

You get partnered with Riggs
three days,

you crashed two cars
and nearly got yourself killed.

-You ever feel like you made
the wrong career choice?
-Yeah, the day I met you.

ANNOUNCER:
Lethal Weapon. Wednesdays.

Man, take
the damn shades off!

Man, put the damn shades
back on.

On Fox.