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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,906 --> 00:00:03,744 Bunny, I'm so excited you finally decided to visit. 2 00:00:03,869 --> 00:00:05,797 Well, we always said if we were both single, right? 3 00:00:06,250 --> 00:00:08,682 Right. I mean, we were two ships passing in the night. 4 00:00:08,807 --> 00:00:09,850 You always had your boyfriend, 5 00:00:09,975 --> 00:00:10,951 I was always, you know, busy. 6 00:00:11,076 --> 00:00:12,846 As I told you, I'm a very busy person. 7 00:00:13,012 --> 00:00:15,488 But now we're at the same harbor, huh? 8 00:00:15,613 --> 00:00:16,822 I can hear the waves crashing. 9 00:00:16,947 --> 00:00:18,891 I thought I just heard a foghorn. 10 00:00:19,016 --> 00:00:19,728 [Imitating foghorn] 11 00:00:20,017 --> 00:00:21,694 I smell fish. 12 00:00:21,819 --> 00:00:23,363 I mean, not...not on you. 13 00:00:23,488 --> 00:00:25,398 I don't even smell fish. I made that...I'm sorry. 14 00:00:25,523 --> 00:00:26,999 Um... 15 00:00:27,124 --> 00:00:28,401 And, um... 16 00:00:28,526 --> 00:00:30,236 I don't know where these horses came from, 17 00:00:30,361 --> 00:00:31,448 but those are horses. 18 00:00:31,695 --> 00:00:36,442 So... right here we got the, uh, breakfast foyer, 19 00:00:36,567 --> 00:00:39,744 and, um, the entertainment center, of course, 20 00:00:39,869 --> 00:00:43,148 and, uh, balloons, I guess. 21 00:00:43,273 --> 00:00:45,350 It looks like rubber gloves and condoms. 22 00:00:45,475 --> 00:00:46,818 Yeah, no, they are. 23 00:00:46,943 --> 00:00:50,788 Um, probably just my roommates' way of saying welcome to you, 24 00:00:50,913 --> 00:00:52,056 'cause they're funny, 25 00:00:52,181 --> 00:00:53,458 and we're never gonna meet them together, 26 00:00:53,583 --> 00:00:54,892 'cause I don't want you to. 27 00:00:55,017 --> 00:00:58,308 Well, why don't we take this tour to your bedroom? 28 00:00:58,474 --> 00:01:01,061 I'm not saying I'm gonna be rusty, but... 29 00:01:01,227 --> 00:01:02,567 Hey, Ders. 30 00:01:02,692 --> 00:01:04,134 You want a... you want a haircut? 31 00:01:04,259 --> 00:01:06,065 I'm like a shear genius with these scissors. 32 00:01:06,190 --> 00:01:07,234 Why is this happening? 33 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:10,974 Karl's getting married. We're losing a dude. 34 00:01:11,099 --> 00:01:15,659 [All screaming] 35 00:01:15,825 --> 00:01:19,746 Sync and correction by Mlmlte www.addic7ed.com 36 00:01:27,837 --> 00:01:30,048 We're not having a wedding in this house ever. 37 00:01:30,214 --> 00:01:32,794 Well, Ders, I wish you would've brought it up earlier 38 00:01:32,919 --> 00:01:34,636 because it's in, like, five hours, 39 00:01:34,802 --> 00:01:37,264 and we sent a "save the dates" out yesterday. 40 00:01:37,430 --> 00:01:38,432 Did you not get it? 41 00:01:38,598 --> 00:01:41,969 No, you got it. I slipped one under your door. 42 00:01:44,664 --> 00:01:45,607 because I was eating Froot Loops. 43 00:01:45,732 --> 00:01:47,065 - Dang it. - Our bad. 44 00:01:47,231 --> 00:01:48,510 Come on, Ders, Hannah's amazing. 45 00:01:48,635 --> 00:01:49,484 I'm changing for her. 46 00:01:49,650 --> 00:01:51,045 Yep, uh, he's definitely changing. 47 00:01:51,170 --> 00:01:52,912 He sold the rape van, and he quit selling weed, 48 00:01:53,037 --> 00:01:54,281 - which is... - Yeah, how stupid. 49 00:01:54,406 --> 00:01:56,074 - A life decision. - Yeah, that's dumb. 50 00:01:56,240 --> 00:01:57,993 Yeah, and I got glasses to fix the wonky eye. 51 00:01:58,159 --> 00:01:59,686 - Can you put 'em on me? - Yep, mm-hmm. 52 00:01:59,811 --> 00:02:00,620 - Nice. - Check that out. 53 00:02:00,786 --> 00:02:02,088 Check it out. Wonk gone. 54 00:02:02,213 --> 00:02:05,417 Come on. Weddings. 55 00:02:05,583 --> 00:02:07,627 No, uh, they're gonna go, and we're gonna... 56 00:02:07,752 --> 00:02:11,330 No, we've got to help. 57 00:02:11,455 --> 00:02:13,258 How can we help you guys? 58 00:02:13,424 --> 00:02:14,926 Are you sure our neighbors won't mind? 59 00:02:15,225 --> 00:02:16,935 Oh, no. We steal stuff from 'em all the time. 60 00:02:17,060 --> 00:02:18,930 Bikes, lemons, internet. Yeah. 61 00:02:19,096 --> 00:02:21,224 Garden weasel weaseling over. Whoa. 62 00:02:21,390 --> 00:02:22,575 Careful. 63 00:02:22,700 --> 00:02:25,310 Ah! One down, one down. 64 00:02:25,435 --> 00:02:27,279 I think it's really cool you and Ders had a pact 65 00:02:27,404 --> 00:02:29,441 that if you're ever single, you guys bone each other. 66 00:02:29,607 --> 00:02:30,848 Did you tell them? 67 00:02:30,973 --> 00:02:32,611 No, I never used the word "bone". 68 00:02:32,777 --> 00:02:34,029 He said, "bone." 69 00:02:34,477 --> 00:02:36,573 Anyway, we're gonna be over here, guys. 70 00:02:36,739 --> 00:02:38,256 You know, I used to have a marriage pact. 71 00:02:38,381 --> 00:02:39,290 - That's cool. - It's true. 72 00:02:39,415 --> 00:02:41,024 I was 16, she was 11. 73 00:02:41,149 --> 00:02:43,327 She acted really old, though. She acted like... 74 00:02:43,452 --> 00:02:44,956 - 13 at least. - That's old. 75 00:02:45,122 --> 00:02:46,166 I was gonna wait for her, 76 00:02:46,332 --> 00:02:48,499 but then girls in my grade started to develop, 77 00:02:48,624 --> 00:02:49,633 so I sort of went that way. 78 00:02:49,758 --> 00:02:51,602 - I wonder how old she is now. - Boobs rule. 79 00:02:51,879 --> 00:02:52,869 Oh, my goodness. 80 00:02:52,994 --> 00:02:55,133 Tell me these are the arrangements for the wedding. 81 00:02:55,299 --> 00:02:58,011 Thank you, thank you, this is awesome. 82 00:02:58,177 --> 00:02:59,375 Blake, before I forget, I really just wanted 83 00:02:59,500 --> 00:03:00,776 to give you this. 84 00:03:00,901 --> 00:03:03,079 It's a token of my appreciation 85 00:03:03,349 --> 00:03:04,914 for you being the best best man 86 00:03:05,039 --> 00:03:06,048 in the entire universe. 87 00:03:06,173 --> 00:03:07,149 - Gas masks. - Yeah. 88 00:03:07,274 --> 00:03:08,605 Is that an antique Zong? 89 00:03:08,771 --> 00:03:09,719 - Yeah. - This is old school. 90 00:03:09,844 --> 00:03:11,553 And all your slammers? Very cool. 91 00:03:11,678 --> 00:03:13,088 All of my slammers, everything. 92 00:03:13,213 --> 00:03:14,194 Why are you giving this all to me? 93 00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:15,153 I'm moving on. 94 00:03:15,382 --> 00:03:17,459 That was me, and this is me. 95 00:03:17,738 --> 00:03:20,795 Adam, I'd think about cutting down on the smoking. 96 00:03:20,920 --> 00:03:21,827 Oh, that isn't weed. 97 00:03:21,993 --> 00:03:23,578 But this is your favorite stuff. 98 00:03:23,744 --> 00:03:25,601 Blake, it's like "Shakesbeers" once penned: 99 00:03:25,726 --> 00:03:27,749 "If you love a girl, and you love her a lot, 100 00:03:28,394 --> 00:03:31,606 "then it's your responsibility... nay, your duty... 101 00:03:31,731 --> 00:03:35,924 To change completely to be more similar doth that girl." 102 00:03:36,090 --> 00:03:37,676 Yeah, doth... doth must change. 103 00:03:37,842 --> 00:03:38,802 I am changing. 104 00:03:38,968 --> 00:03:39,980 Shakespeare was a smart dude. 105 00:03:40,105 --> 00:03:42,138 - He was the president of Rome. - That is correct. 106 00:03:42,304 --> 00:03:43,390 - Is this tear gas? - Yeah. 107 00:03:43,556 --> 00:03:44,975 I caught that up in a riot in Seattle. 108 00:03:45,141 --> 00:03:46,309 I thought you'd like it. 109 00:03:46,475 --> 00:03:49,688 Adam, how are we doing on the music for the ceremony? 110 00:03:49,854 --> 00:03:52,024 Well, I told you that I needed money 111 00:03:52,149 --> 00:03:53,149 if I was gonna get anyone good. 112 00:03:53,315 --> 00:03:54,494 So I haven't really... 113 00:03:54,619 --> 00:03:55,944 Plus it's not all about you today, man. 114 00:03:56,220 --> 00:03:58,398 Look at me, I'm dateless. You have love, I have nothing. 115 00:03:58,523 --> 00:03:59,398 I have nothing in my life. 116 00:03:59,523 --> 00:04:01,257 I'm an unlovable, dateless loser. 117 00:04:01,782 --> 00:04:04,236 Okay, so here is my entire life savings 118 00:04:04,361 --> 00:04:05,771 in $100 bills. 119 00:04:05,896 --> 00:04:06,872 I give it to you so that you 120 00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:09,198 can get a band that is very classy. 121 00:04:09,623 --> 00:04:11,377 I'm thinking Primus or Green Day. 122 00:04:11,502 --> 00:04:13,312 Them or Jakob Dylan. 123 00:04:13,437 --> 00:04:14,379 Did you just say, "Jakob Dylan"? 124 00:04:14,545 --> 00:04:15,505 Wallflowers' Jakob Dylan? 125 00:04:15,671 --> 00:04:16,748 That Jakob Dylan. 126 00:04:16,873 --> 00:04:19,150 I know what I have to do. 127 00:04:19,425 --> 00:04:21,919 Hyah! Hyah! Hyah! Was that... 128 00:04:22,044 --> 00:04:23,755 Hyah! That's a stopping sound. 129 00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:24,848 Good work. 130 00:04:25,014 --> 00:04:28,726 [Knocks on door] 131 00:04:28,851 --> 00:04:30,979 Guess who came back for you. 132 00:04:31,145 --> 00:04:34,531 Oh, yeah. We're done. 133 00:04:34,656 --> 00:04:35,799 We're done. Nice job. 134 00:04:35,924 --> 00:04:37,934 What do you say we hit the sack? 135 00:04:38,059 --> 00:04:39,235 - Anders. - Come on. 136 00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:41,672 - You said we would help. - Okay, I-I'm sorry. 137 00:04:41,797 --> 00:04:43,774 I'm not being sensitive, you're probably not in the mood, 138 00:04:43,899 --> 00:04:45,442 we're out here sweating under the hot sun. 139 00:04:45,567 --> 00:04:47,579 Give me your hands. Let's play a game. 140 00:04:47,745 --> 00:04:51,333 It's called "how close can you get to me without kissing me?" 141 00:04:54,942 --> 00:04:56,719 - This close. - Uh-oh. 142 00:04:56,844 --> 00:04:59,049 - Come on. Jesus! - Looks like love is in the air. 143 00:04:59,215 --> 00:05:00,759 Scared the hell out of me, man. 144 00:05:00,925 --> 00:05:02,325 Oh, my gosh. These are looking great. 145 00:05:02,450 --> 00:05:04,158 Bunny, you're doing an excellent job. 146 00:05:04,283 --> 00:05:06,060 - Those look beautiful. - Thank you. 147 00:05:06,185 --> 00:05:08,730 Uh, Anders, if you could do me a favor 148 00:05:08,855 --> 00:05:10,298 and put the red ones to the outside, 149 00:05:10,423 --> 00:05:11,833 and the white ones on the inside, 150 00:05:11,958 --> 00:05:12,867 that'd be much appreciated. 151 00:05:12,992 --> 00:05:14,856 It's just a tad bit classier. 152 00:05:15,022 --> 00:05:16,471 So you want this to be classier? 153 00:05:16,596 --> 00:05:17,525 Yeah. 154 00:05:17,691 --> 00:05:19,861 None of this is gonna be classy, 155 00:05:20,027 --> 00:05:21,279 because it's your wedding, 156 00:05:21,445 --> 00:05:24,034 and you're dirty brown water trash. 157 00:05:24,323 --> 00:05:29,579 And you're always going to be dirty brown water trash. 158 00:05:34,179 --> 00:05:35,621 Why are you so mean to him? 159 00:05:35,746 --> 00:05:37,170 He seems like a total sweetheart. 160 00:05:37,336 --> 00:05:39,058 He seems? You don't know him, okay? 161 00:05:39,183 --> 00:05:40,793 This is the guy who borrows 162 00:05:40,918 --> 00:05:43,496 my VHS autographed copy of D.A.R.Y.L, 163 00:05:43,621 --> 00:05:45,887 - and then never returns it. - I'm sorry, who is Daryl? 164 00:05:46,053 --> 00:05:47,667 What's D.A.R.Y.L.? D.A.R.Y.L is a movie. 165 00:05:47,792 --> 00:05:50,470 It's, like, the best movie ever made about an android boy 166 00:05:50,595 --> 00:05:52,371 that, like, just wanted to be a real human child, 167 00:05:52,496 --> 00:05:53,436 but didn't know... 168 00:05:53,697 --> 00:05:54,729 Well, it sounds awful. 169 00:05:54,895 --> 00:05:57,743 - Yeah. - No, the movie. 170 00:05:57,868 --> 00:05:59,110 The movie's great. 171 00:05:59,235 --> 00:06:01,778 You're thinking of a.I., which was still pretty good. 172 00:06:01,944 --> 00:06:04,549 I was 16, you were 11. 173 00:06:04,674 --> 00:06:06,658 My mom paid you to help me with my math. 174 00:06:06,824 --> 00:06:07,826 What are you doing here? 175 00:06:07,992 --> 00:06:09,353 I'm a rich dude now, 176 00:06:09,478 --> 00:06:11,622 and I came to proclaim my love. 177 00:06:11,747 --> 00:06:12,789 So look at the top hat, 178 00:06:13,048 --> 00:06:15,750 and also the $70 dress that I got you, 179 00:06:15,916 --> 00:06:19,430 $22 in flowers, $66 in jelly beans. 180 00:06:19,555 --> 00:06:21,766 Is that buttered popcorn? [Sniffs] 181 00:06:21,891 --> 00:06:24,667 Yeah, it is. Your favorite. And I remember that. 182 00:06:24,792 --> 00:06:27,220 And that's not scary that I remembered it at all. 183 00:06:27,386 --> 00:06:28,471 What is this for? 184 00:06:28,762 --> 00:06:30,139 We were already supposed to be tongue-deep 185 00:06:30,264 --> 00:06:32,141 in each other by now, so this is awkward. 186 00:06:32,266 --> 00:06:35,244 You forgot about our marriage pact, didn't you? 187 00:06:35,369 --> 00:06:37,647 Yeah, 'cause you said that when you were 18, 188 00:06:37,772 --> 00:06:40,181 that we would get married under the moonlit sky, 189 00:06:40,306 --> 00:06:41,735 and I would buy you apple pucker, 190 00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:44,029 and we would both drink it into the night. 191 00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:45,487 But I'm not ready for that right now, 192 00:06:45,612 --> 00:06:47,157 so put it back in your pants, okay? 193 00:06:47,323 --> 00:06:49,758 I'm just looking for a date to my drug dealer's wedding, 194 00:06:49,883 --> 00:06:52,060 and quite frankly, you developed into... 195 00:06:52,185 --> 00:06:54,596 Just a real sexy broad. 196 00:06:54,721 --> 00:06:58,033 Those...those are some real classy dogs up top. 197 00:06:58,158 --> 00:07:00,068 - They're barking at me. - I'm Melissa's father. 198 00:07:00,193 --> 00:07:02,380 Can I help you? 199 00:07:02,546 --> 00:07:06,051 200 00:07:08,677 --> 00:07:12,057 [Playing harmonica] 201 00:07:12,223 --> 00:07:14,391 {pub}So... 202 00:07:14,516 --> 00:07:16,644 I was thinking for the dinner beverage, 203 00:07:16,810 --> 00:07:20,148 we have a four loko watermelon from '09. 204 00:07:20,314 --> 00:07:24,402 That's when it was still, like, you know, the good stuff. 205 00:07:24,568 --> 00:07:25,868 Looks [Bleep] Stupid. 206 00:07:25,993 --> 00:07:28,571 Okay. Talk to me. 207 00:07:28,696 --> 00:07:30,540 All right, man. 208 00:07:30,665 --> 00:07:33,078 Hannah's this fancy chick who works at a credit union. 209 00:07:33,244 --> 00:07:34,243 D d me? 210 00:07:34,368 --> 00:07:37,582 I'm stupid, dumb, ugly, brown water trash. 211 00:07:37,748 --> 00:07:38,792 Don't say that. 212 00:07:38,958 --> 00:07:40,415 Maybe I should just call it off. 213 00:07:40,540 --> 00:07:41,984 I'll stand by that decision. 214 00:07:42,109 --> 00:07:43,797 It's just that she makes me so happy, you know? 215 00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:46,174 She lets me pork her while she's sleeping. 216 00:07:46,340 --> 00:07:47,842 - Sleep assault? - Yeah. 217 00:07:48,008 --> 00:07:49,594 - That's your favorite. - I know. 218 00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:50,804 I mean, that's love. 219 00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:52,222 Now you know what I'm dealing with. 220 00:07:52,388 --> 00:07:54,595 I think I know what we're gonna do. 221 00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:55,892 We're gonna throw you 222 00:07:56,058 --> 00:08:01,369 the classiest, bestest wedding that we can! 223 00:08:01,647 --> 00:08:04,104 I apologize for saying, "Big-titted Freak Show." 224 00:08:04,229 --> 00:08:05,538 I will say that. 225 00:08:05,663 --> 00:08:07,440 But I have a marriage pact with your daughter, 226 00:08:07,565 --> 00:08:11,345 and we love each other, so... 227 00:08:11,470 --> 00:08:12,242 Hi, dad. 228 00:08:12,504 --> 00:08:13,446 I lied to you, okay? 229 00:08:13,571 --> 00:08:15,411 I wasn't 11, I was 9. 230 00:08:15,577 --> 00:08:18,039 I'm 16 right now, not 18. 231 00:08:18,205 --> 00:08:19,219 Wow. 232 00:08:19,344 --> 00:08:20,686 I wasn't even attracted d to you. 233 00:08:20,811 --> 00:08:22,418 I just used you to get rid to the B.K. 234 00:08:22,584 --> 00:08:25,004 - I'm so sorry. - Okay. 235 00:08:25,170 --> 00:08:26,792 You wouldn't happen to have a connection 236 00:08:26,917 --> 00:08:29,134 with singer-songwriter Jakob Dylan, would you? 237 00:08:29,300 --> 00:08:30,296 Shouldn't b be helping? 238 00:08:30,421 --> 00:08:31,597 There's still a lot more flowers to do, 239 00:08:31,722 --> 00:08:33,099 and I know they need more chairs outside. 240 00:08:33,224 --> 00:08:34,267 Well, they don't. It will be fine. 241 00:08:34,392 --> 00:08:35,334 I want to give you the rest of a that tour. 242 00:08:35,459 --> 00:08:36,401 Okay. 243 00:08:36,526 --> 00:08:38,270 Why does this keep happening to me? 244 00:08:38,395 --> 00:08:39,504 Get out! 245 00:08:39,629 --> 00:08:40,605 Get out! You get out! 246 00:08:40,730 --> 00:08:42,697 This is my room in my house. 247 00:08:44,398 --> 00:08:46,818 - No! I need that! - Stop! 248 00:08:47,337 --> 00:08:48,194 [All gasp] 249 00:08:48,360 --> 00:08:50,405 - Oh! - Okay. 250 00:08:50,571 --> 00:08:52,216 You just ruined the bride's dress. 251 00:08:52,489 --> 00:08:53,650 The sequins ruined the dress. 252 00:08:53,775 --> 00:08:54,785 I just spilled wine on it, 253 00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:56,536 and I'm not feeling bad about it at all. 254 00:08:56,702 --> 00:08:58,555 You have some real problems. 255 00:08:58,680 --> 00:09:00,024 Yeah, I have some problems. 256 00:09:00,149 --> 00:09:01,425 One, two, three problems. 257 00:09:01,550 --> 00:09:02,542 I got 40 problems in the front yard, 258 00:09:02,708 --> 00:09:03,794 10 in the back yard. 259 00:09:03,919 --> 00:09:05,029 These are people running around my house 260 00:09:05,154 --> 00:09:06,462 when I'm just trying to buck my soul mate. 261 00:09:06,628 --> 00:09:07,505 Because that's the way I feel about you. 262 00:09:07,671 --> 00:09:08,531 It's been so long and I feel like 263 00:09:08,656 --> 00:09:10,166 we got this connection going. 264 00:09:10,291 --> 00:09:13,303 But we can't do anything because they're having this wedding! 265 00:09:13,594 --> 00:09:14,703 Look, I'm sorry. Let me be honest. 266 00:09:14,828 --> 00:09:16,239 I just haven't bucked in, like, a year and a half, 267 00:09:16,364 --> 00:09:17,273 and I'm trying to buck. 268 00:09:17,398 --> 00:09:18,892 Your butt cheeks are driving me insane. 269 00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:19,842 Let me buck you. 270 00:09:19,967 --> 00:09:21,186 I don't do bucking. 271 00:09:21,352 --> 00:09:22,103 How's it going? 272 00:09:22,336 --> 00:09:23,946 Beverages in the back, help yourself. 273 00:09:24,071 --> 00:09:25,148 Good to see you. 274 00:09:25,405 --> 00:09:27,515 I do not know who they are. Where are all your friends? 275 00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:30,361 These are, like, real showered humans. 276 00:09:30,527 --> 00:09:32,254 No, they're all Hannah's friends from the credit union. 277 00:09:32,379 --> 00:09:33,822 They had suits, so I invited them, dude. 278 00:09:33,947 --> 00:09:35,490 I'm trying to class it up. 279 00:09:35,615 --> 00:09:37,692 I couldn't have Hannah meeting all my scumbag friends. 280 00:09:37,817 --> 00:09:39,527 Except for sewer Dwayne, he's here. 281 00:09:39,652 --> 00:09:41,762 He's running around with, uh, no shirt, overalls. 282 00:09:41,887 --> 00:09:42,763 - Nice. - You seen him? 283 00:09:42,888 --> 00:09:43,833 Yeah, I know sewer Dwayne. 284 00:09:43,999 --> 00:09:45,532 Good, good, good, good, good guy. 285 00:09:45,657 --> 00:09:47,801 Hey, Ders. We got any more chairs? 286 00:09:47,926 --> 00:09:49,172 I need some more chairs. 287 00:09:49,338 --> 00:09:51,174 Check the South side of the house! 288 00:09:54,032 --> 00:09:55,720 Never eat shredded... 289 00:09:55,886 --> 00:09:57,722 - Wheat. - There we go. 290 00:09:59,971 --> 00:10:03,561 [Chuckles] Sewer Dwayne, you dog. 291 00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:06,987 You don't have 40s. 292 00:10:07,112 --> 00:10:08,955 I...you know, I'll call the cops on you. 293 00:10:09,080 --> 00:10:10,190 You threatening me? 294 00:10:10,315 --> 00:10:13,125 I'll call the... I'll call the cops on you. 295 00:10:13,250 --> 00:10:14,526 Spare some change? 296 00:10:14,651 --> 00:10:16,795 How 'bout you spare me your bad attitude, okay? 297 00:10:16,920 --> 00:10:18,030 I'm sick of girls 298 00:10:18,155 --> 00:10:20,265 thinking they can take and take and take from me, 299 00:10:20,390 --> 00:10:24,582 'cause I'm done giving. 300 00:10:24,748 --> 00:10:28,139 A little slug for you, a little slug for me. 301 00:10:28,264 --> 00:10:30,541 A little...what? Oh, you're ignoring me now? 302 00:10:30,666 --> 00:10:32,743 Oh, 'cause you guys are [Bleep]. 303 00:10:32,868 --> 00:10:34,778 Do you need a hand? 304 00:10:34,903 --> 00:10:35,885 No, I'm good. Thank you. 305 00:10:36,051 --> 00:10:37,348 Let me help. 306 00:10:37,473 --> 00:10:40,018 I feel bad for trying to mooch. 307 00:10:40,143 --> 00:10:43,587 O-okay. Okay. 308 00:10:43,712 --> 00:10:45,489 Wow, you're being very pleasant. 309 00:10:45,614 --> 00:10:47,157 Most human girls are very mean to me. 310 00:10:47,282 --> 00:10:48,591 - No. - Like, I'm more of a... 311 00:10:48,716 --> 00:10:50,593 I'm kind of an animal guy. What are you doing? 312 00:10:50,718 --> 00:10:52,193 - Ow, stop it! - Suck it, bitch! 313 00:10:52,359 --> 00:10:53,163 Give me back my malt liquor! 314 00:10:53,288 --> 00:10:54,737 - [Laughs] - You get back here! 315 00:10:54,903 --> 00:10:57,200 [Laughs] 316 00:10:57,325 --> 00:10:58,335 Give it! 317 00:10:58,615 --> 00:11:00,827 - Give it to me! You thief! - No! No! No! No! 318 00:11:00,993 --> 00:11:03,621 [Both screaming] 319 00:11:05,732 --> 00:11:07,417 - Hey. - Hi. 320 00:11:07,583 --> 00:11:10,446 Are you a size four? 321 00:11:10,571 --> 00:11:13,149 Blake, I'm getting real nervous, man. 322 00:11:13,274 --> 00:11:14,340 Hannah's not here yet. 323 00:11:14,506 --> 00:11:15,842 I'm about to have a cow, dude. 324 00:11:16,008 --> 00:11:19,053 Oh, Karl, come on. You're gonna be fine, huh? 325 00:11:19,219 --> 00:11:20,955 She's the one, right? 326 00:11:21,221 --> 00:11:23,266 - She is. She's the one. - Hey, baby. 327 00:11:23,432 --> 00:11:25,393 Hey! There's my baby doll. 328 00:11:25,985 --> 00:11:28,953 Blake, I'd love for you to meet Hannah. 329 00:11:29,354 --> 00:11:29,864 Hi. 330 00:11:29,989 --> 00:11:32,150 [Stammers] Hi. 331 00:11:38,655 --> 00:11:40,332 {pub}So, um, I should be getting ready. 332 00:11:40,457 --> 00:11:41,492 It was nice to meet you. 333 00:11:41,658 --> 00:11:42,910 - Yeah, I met you too. - I'll see you guys. 334 00:11:43,126 --> 00:11:44,602 Do that, babe. You look great already. 335 00:11:44,727 --> 00:11:45,570 Thank you. 336 00:11:45,695 --> 00:11:47,332 Isn't she just fucking classy? 337 00:11:47,564 --> 00:11:48,773 Well, yeah. 338 00:11:48,898 --> 00:11:50,675 Thank you. Thank you. 339 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:52,503 We should probably talk about something, I'm thinking. 340 00:11:52,669 --> 00:11:54,964 [Trumpet impression] Presenting... 341 00:11:55,130 --> 00:11:59,917 Mr. and Mrs. Adam "Kill Zone" Demamp. 342 00:12:00,042 --> 00:12:01,052 This is Rachel. 343 00:12:01,177 --> 00:12:02,954 She's hot as hell. She's not homeless. 344 00:12:03,079 --> 00:12:04,222 We're gonna get fucked up, right? 345 00:12:04,347 --> 00:12:06,090 Yeah, we're gonna get [Bleep] Up, definitely. 346 00:12:06,215 --> 00:12:07,560 - Whatever you want. - Hey, Adam. 347 00:12:07,726 --> 00:12:08,978 - See you got a date there. - Hey. Mm-hmm. 348 00:12:09,144 --> 00:12:10,146 Probably wondering where mine went. 349 00:12:10,312 --> 00:12:11,328 I'm not, really. 350 00:12:11,453 --> 00:12:13,029 We didn't even buck, and she left, 351 00:12:13,154 --> 00:12:14,525 and it's Karl's fault, so I'm gonna make him pay. 352 00:12:14,691 --> 00:12:16,233 Yeah, definitely, definitely, definitely. 353 00:12:16,358 --> 00:12:18,279 This is my date. Her name is Rachel. 354 00:12:18,445 --> 00:12:20,436 She's never been homeless, so scoreboard for me. 355 00:12:20,561 --> 00:12:21,872 - Hang on to her, man. - Count that. 356 00:12:21,997 --> 00:12:23,173 - What have you got? - It doesn't last forever. 357 00:12:23,298 --> 00:12:24,911 I got, uh, booze... 358 00:12:25,077 --> 00:12:27,766 Dude, I wanna take a [Bleep] Header to the dome. 359 00:12:28,163 --> 00:12:31,459 Okay, uh, real drugs. Not my cup o' tea. 360 00:12:31,705 --> 00:12:32,882 Where's your medicine cabinet? 361 00:12:33,007 --> 00:12:34,083 It's this way. 362 00:12:34,208 --> 00:12:35,550 Sometimes, I-I take a bunch of Ambien 363 00:12:35,675 --> 00:12:36,651 and see how long I can masturbate. 364 00:12:36,776 --> 00:12:37,799 You're such a pussy. 365 00:12:37,965 --> 00:12:39,454 So, uh, what were you... what were you telling me? 366 00:12:39,579 --> 00:12:40,522 You had something to tell me? 367 00:12:40,647 --> 00:12:42,690 Uh...Yes, I did. I did. 368 00:12:42,815 --> 00:12:44,592 - Uh, sewer Dwayne. - Right. 369 00:12:44,717 --> 00:12:46,227 I caught him munchin' buhzoombuhs like... 370 00:12:46,352 --> 00:12:47,695 Like cinnamon rolls, basically. 371 00:12:47,820 --> 00:12:50,064 Oh, my God. Speaking of buhzoombuhs... 372 00:12:50,189 --> 00:12:50,937 Mommy! 373 00:12:51,103 --> 00:12:53,902 [Laughs] Oh! 374 00:12:54,027 --> 00:12:56,442 Blake, I'd love for you to meet the best mommy 375 00:12:56,608 --> 00:12:59,672 in the entire universe, my mommy. 376 00:12:59,797 --> 00:13:01,239 Mommy, this is Blake. 377 00:13:01,405 --> 00:13:03,977 Miss Karl, hey, I wish it was better circumstances. 378 00:13:04,102 --> 00:13:06,619 I'm joking. And congratulations. 379 00:13:06,785 --> 00:13:08,648 This is gonna be fucking wild. 380 00:13:08,773 --> 00:13:10,039 Oh. 381 00:13:10,205 --> 00:13:12,685 You see, today is the most special day 382 00:13:12,810 --> 00:13:13,876 of my entire existence, 383 00:13:14,042 --> 00:13:16,789 and I realize now that if anything were to go wrong, 384 00:13:16,914 --> 00:13:19,966 I would probably just [Bleep] Kill myself like my dad. 385 00:13:21,758 --> 00:13:23,362 Hey, Hannah, are you in there? 386 00:13:23,487 --> 00:13:24,887 - Hannah. - What do you want? 387 00:13:25,053 --> 00:13:26,966 I just need to talk to Hannah very, very... 388 00:13:27,091 --> 00:13:28,200 Okay, well, she's busy, 389 00:13:28,325 --> 00:13:29,835 and another guy already ruined her dress, so... 390 00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:31,669 - Okay, I didn't do that. - No boys allowed. 391 00:13:31,794 --> 00:13:34,355 But I... [Grunts] 392 00:13:34,597 --> 00:13:35,982 Okay. 393 00:13:39,001 --> 00:13:42,180 - So starchy. - Need a hand there, partner? 394 00:13:42,305 --> 00:13:45,483 Uh, yeah, sure. I appreciate it, braj. 395 00:13:45,608 --> 00:13:47,117 My pleasure. 396 00:13:47,242 --> 00:13:48,552 So you ready for the big day? 397 00:13:48,677 --> 00:13:49,553 Oh, a thousand times, "yes." 398 00:13:49,678 --> 00:13:51,221 - I love Hannah so much. - Mm-hmm. 399 00:13:51,346 --> 00:13:52,689 She works at a credit union, man, 400 00:13:52,814 --> 00:13:54,325 she's really, really classy. 401 00:13:54,450 --> 00:13:55,725 Did I tell you that? 402 00:13:55,850 --> 00:13:57,336 You did. Very cool. 403 00:13:57,752 --> 00:13:58,695 So what about you and bunny? 404 00:13:58,820 --> 00:14:01,298 You think there's a future there? 405 00:14:01,423 --> 00:14:03,166 Nope, not any more. 406 00:14:03,291 --> 00:14:05,268 Really? Why not? She was cool. 407 00:14:05,393 --> 00:14:07,305 She sure was, but she's gone. 408 00:14:07,562 --> 00:14:10,639 And we never bucked, so... What are you gonna do? 409 00:14:10,764 --> 00:14:12,275 I got my eye on somebody else, though. 410 00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:15,178 - Nice. - Yeah. 411 00:14:15,303 --> 00:14:17,036 Here we go. Perfect. 412 00:14:17,439 --> 00:14:18,680 Now if you don't mind, Karl, 413 00:14:18,805 --> 00:14:23,885 I'm gonna go buck your mom. 414 00:14:24,010 --> 00:14:25,944 No! 415 00:14:34,520 --> 00:14:36,497 Oh, my God. Oh. 416 00:14:36,622 --> 00:14:38,711 This is delicious. 417 00:14:38,877 --> 00:14:41,202 It's a mixture of red wine, pain-killers, cough syrup, 418 00:14:41,327 --> 00:14:42,769 and bath salts. 419 00:14:42,894 --> 00:14:44,008 A lot of bath salts. 420 00:14:44,174 --> 00:14:46,773 - Is that safe? - Not for your brain. 421 00:14:46,898 --> 00:14:50,010 But it's the best high we're gonna have tonight. 422 00:14:50,135 --> 00:14:51,724 [Imitating Mrs. Doubtfire] Hello! 423 00:14:51,890 --> 00:14:54,268 Euphegenia Henderson, my dear. 424 00:14:54,434 --> 00:14:56,782 I'm the great-great-grandmother of the bride. 425 00:14:56,907 --> 00:14:57,939 How is my lovely? 426 00:14:58,176 --> 00:14:59,524 I can see your face, idiot. 427 00:15:00,211 --> 00:15:02,155 Take off her dress, and leave us alone. 428 00:15:02,280 --> 00:15:04,657 You're not funny. 429 00:15:04,782 --> 00:15:07,031 [Still as Mrs. Doubtfire] Hello! 430 00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:09,585 Hannah? 431 00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:17,449 {pub}Oh, you're wonderful. Remember, I taught you? 432 00:15:17,574 --> 00:15:19,851 I do, I do. I know. That was awesome. 433 00:15:19,976 --> 00:15:21,128 [Music stops] 434 00:15:21,294 --> 00:15:23,287 Ders, what are you doing? 435 00:15:23,412 --> 00:15:25,656 I'm just, uh, looking for the hole in the ceiling, 436 00:15:25,781 --> 00:15:27,324 because I'm pretty sure you fell from heaven. 437 00:15:27,449 --> 00:15:28,359 Hi, I'm Anders. 438 00:15:28,484 --> 00:15:30,561 Oh, wow, I like him. 439 00:15:30,686 --> 00:15:32,930 Mommy, this is Ders, and Ders is evil, 440 00:15:33,055 --> 00:15:34,559 and he needs to leave. 441 00:15:34,725 --> 00:15:35,665 Karl, I'm not evil. 442 00:15:35,790 --> 00:15:38,368 Well, maybe I am. I don't know. 443 00:15:38,493 --> 00:15:40,537 But seriously, I just wanted to show you guys a few steps, 444 00:15:40,662 --> 00:15:42,305 a few moves that I know, that could, you know, 445 00:15:42,430 --> 00:15:43,526 help you out tonight on the dance floor. 446 00:15:43,692 --> 00:15:45,442 - Really? - Mommy, no. 447 00:15:45,567 --> 00:15:47,778 First thing's first, let's, uh, switch this beat up. 448 00:15:47,903 --> 00:15:50,013 [R&b music playing] Now we're talking. 449 00:15:50,138 --> 00:15:52,201 You bring the rhythm, I'll bring the blues. 450 00:15:52,367 --> 00:15:54,996 Ooh. Black music. 451 00:15:55,162 --> 00:15:58,253 Yes. 452 00:15:58,378 --> 00:15:59,522 You know, when I'm dancing, 453 00:15:59,647 --> 00:16:02,024 I like to see how close I can get without kissing. 454 00:16:02,149 --> 00:16:04,964 I find it very erotic. 455 00:16:07,921 --> 00:16:11,433 But sometimes, you got to save that...For later. 456 00:16:11,558 --> 00:16:13,167 Okay? 457 00:16:13,292 --> 00:16:17,839 So, uh, Karl, the bowtie, come on. 458 00:16:17,964 --> 00:16:22,444 [Whispered] I can do anything I want with her. 459 00:16:22,569 --> 00:16:24,368 Okay? Hey, great meeting you. 460 00:16:24,691 --> 00:16:27,028 - I'll see you out there? - Lovely meeting you. 461 00:16:27,194 --> 00:16:29,614 Well, it's, uh, go time... 462 00:16:29,780 --> 00:16:34,869 Unless, uh, we're thinking maybe we don't want a go time. 463 00:16:35,035 --> 00:16:37,057 Welcome, everyone, to the marriage 464 00:16:37,182 --> 00:16:39,516 of Karl Carlos hevacheck, 465 00:16:39,641 --> 00:16:41,792 and...Hannah. 466 00:16:42,352 --> 00:16:44,831 Well, let's just get right off t-t-to the important stuff. 467 00:16:44,956 --> 00:16:46,714 Does anybody here have an objection? 468 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,424 Does anybody object to the marriage? 469 00:16:48,590 --> 00:16:50,635 Speak now, forever hold your peace. 470 00:16:50,801 --> 00:16:52,219 Any objections? 471 00:16:52,385 --> 00:16:54,039 Oh! Ha-ha! I knew it. 472 00:16:54,164 --> 00:16:55,765 Yes, sir, what's your object... 473 00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:58,267 No? Well, you moved a little. 474 00:16:58,433 --> 00:16:59,978 - I think we're good, bro. - Okay. All right. 475 00:17:00,103 --> 00:17:02,347 Last call, any objections? 476 00:17:02,472 --> 00:17:04,899 Yes, I have an objection. Yep, that's right. 477 00:17:05,065 --> 00:17:09,220 I have an objection because I saw this girl 478 00:17:09,345 --> 00:17:10,946 basically just getting the butter 479 00:17:11,363 --> 00:17:13,282 sucked out of her boobs by sewer Dwayne. 480 00:17:13,448 --> 00:17:15,826 That's right. Karl, I'm sorry. 481 00:17:15,951 --> 00:17:16,994 I had to tell you this 482 00:17:17,160 --> 00:17:18,829 because I'm just a really good friend of yours, 483 00:17:18,995 --> 00:17:21,164 and you're changing for all the wrong reasons. 484 00:17:21,289 --> 00:17:22,265 Okay, whatever. 485 00:17:22,390 --> 00:17:23,834 I was just trying to piss my parents off 486 00:17:23,959 --> 00:17:25,302 by marrying water trash. 487 00:17:25,427 --> 00:17:27,337 And then you started dressing all weird and... 488 00:17:27,504 --> 00:17:29,305 We were gonna have a house in the suburbs, 489 00:17:29,430 --> 00:17:30,573 we were gonna have babies, 490 00:17:30,698 --> 00:17:33,344 and then those babies were gonna suck on your titties. 491 00:17:33,510 --> 00:17:34,845 What the [Bleep] Is up with your hair? 492 00:17:35,011 --> 00:17:36,445 - It's for you. - It's stupid. 493 00:17:36,570 --> 00:17:38,982 It's classy. It's like yours. 494 00:17:39,107 --> 00:17:42,519 Hannah, I might be water trash, 495 00:17:42,644 --> 00:17:44,647 but I'm also a water human. 496 00:17:44,813 --> 00:17:46,649 That doesn't even mean anything. 497 00:17:46,815 --> 00:17:49,725 Mommy, let's... 498 00:17:49,850 --> 00:17:51,278 Mommy? Blake, where's mommy? 499 00:17:51,444 --> 00:17:52,427 - I... - She's with Ders. 500 00:17:52,552 --> 00:17:53,614 Mommy! Mommy! 501 00:17:53,780 --> 00:17:55,700 Mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy mommy, mommy, mommy. 502 00:17:55,866 --> 00:17:56,732 I got it! 503 00:17:56,857 --> 00:17:59,734 I'll take care of it. 504 00:17:59,859 --> 00:18:00,801 Hey, gang. 505 00:18:00,926 --> 00:18:02,123 I know that we saw one love 506 00:18:02,289 --> 00:18:04,291 dissolve into oblivion. 507 00:18:04,457 --> 00:18:08,004 But did we see another love blossom into fruitation? 508 00:18:08,170 --> 00:18:10,214 Can I have my [Bleep] Drink back, please? 509 00:18:10,380 --> 00:18:12,914 Rachel, this is for you. 510 00:18:13,039 --> 00:18:14,802 Jakob Dylan, hit it. 511 00:18:14,968 --> 00:18:16,282 [Pop ballad music] 512 00:18:16,407 --> 00:18:19,719 I don't care if you're drunk and you're toothless 513 00:18:19,844 --> 00:18:23,056 I don't care if your body stinks 514 00:18:23,181 --> 00:18:26,225 I don't care that you live in an alley 515 00:18:26,350 --> 00:18:29,316 'cause them titties make my heart sing 516 00:18:29,854 --> 00:18:33,032 I don't care if you eat from a dumpster 517 00:18:33,157 --> 00:18:36,501 I don't care that you beg for change 518 00:18:36,626 --> 00:18:39,805 I don't care that I don't really know you 519 00:18:39,930 --> 00:18:42,107 'cause those titties make my heart insane 520 00:18:42,232 --> 00:18:45,210 I wanna suck 521 00:18:45,335 --> 00:18:48,312 suck on your boobs 522 00:18:48,437 --> 00:18:51,415 maybe some kisses 523 00:18:51,540 --> 00:18:54,009 and back to the booze 524 00:18:54,549 --> 00:18:56,487 whoa-oh 525 00:18:56,612 --> 00:18:58,556 let them say 526 00:18:58,681 --> 00:19:01,626 what they want 527 00:19:01,751 --> 00:19:04,028 Are we gonna do this, braj? 528 00:19:04,153 --> 00:19:06,062 So you have a wonky eye too? Okay, wow. 529 00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:09,200 Oh, whoa, ho, ho 530 00:19:09,481 --> 00:19:11,650 [Music drops out] ha, ha, ha, ha, ha 531 00:19:11,816 --> 00:19:12,818 What are you lookin' at? 532 00:19:12,984 --> 00:19:14,612 Mommy! 533 00:19:14,778 --> 00:19:15,905 Did you buck mommy? 534 00:19:16,071 --> 00:19:18,908 No, Karl, I didn't buck mommy. 535 00:19:19,074 --> 00:19:21,644 For a second, I imagined having a kid that was part you, 536 00:19:21,769 --> 00:19:23,903 and my dick went back inside my body. 537 00:19:24,496 --> 00:19:25,815 - Happy? - Cool. Thank you. 538 00:19:25,940 --> 00:19:28,542 Let's shut this stupid party down. 539 00:19:28,708 --> 00:19:32,955 Okay, all right, show's over, you credit union dickheads! 540 00:19:33,080 --> 00:19:33,889 Tear gas, incoming! 541 00:19:34,014 --> 00:19:35,549 - Adam, cover your face. - Thank you. 542 00:19:35,715 --> 00:19:39,678 Thank you. Thank you so much. 543 00:19:39,844 --> 00:19:42,331 Ooh. 544 00:19:42,456 --> 00:19:44,225 Whoo! 545 00:19:44,391 --> 00:19:45,810 Thanks for coming. 546 00:19:45,976 --> 00:19:47,435 Thank you! 547 00:19:47,560 --> 00:19:48,938 Get out of here! 548 00:19:49,104 --> 00:19:50,397 We're good. We can take 'em off. 549 00:19:50,630 --> 00:19:52,607 Well, it's good to have you back, Karl. 550 00:19:52,732 --> 00:19:53,651 Uh, here's all your stuff. 551 00:19:53,817 --> 00:19:54,976 Thank you, thank you. 552 00:19:55,101 --> 00:19:56,410 And it's great to be back, you know? 553 00:19:56,535 --> 00:19:58,312 Gonna grow my hair out again. 554 00:19:58,437 --> 00:19:59,947 Gonna get the rape van back somehow. 555 00:20:00,072 --> 00:20:02,415 But, uh, until then, hey, Ders... 556 00:20:02,540 --> 00:20:03,617 - This is for you, man. - Whoo! 557 00:20:03,742 --> 00:20:06,053 Consider it a present for not [Bleep] My mom. 558 00:20:06,178 --> 00:20:07,287 I really appreciate that. 559 00:20:07,412 --> 00:20:08,913 No way, man. My d.A.R.Y.L tape. 560 00:20:09,457 --> 00:20:10,724 - Cool. - Yeah. 561 00:20:10,849 --> 00:20:12,259 Wait a second. This isn't it. 562 00:20:12,384 --> 00:20:13,994 - It's out of control. - Mm-hmm. 563 00:20:14,119 --> 00:20:15,928 - My favorite compilation. - Yes! 564 00:20:16,053 --> 00:20:17,496 Definitely gonna buck myself to that tonight. 565 00:20:17,621 --> 00:20:18,884 - Thanks, man. - Nice, man. Friends? 566 00:20:19,123 --> 00:20:20,511 No. I-I want my tape. 567 00:20:20,677 --> 00:20:22,334 Where's...where's my date? 568 00:20:22,459 --> 00:20:24,056 She left without even saying good-bye? 569 00:20:24,222 --> 00:20:26,392 To her credit, we did just tear gas everyone. 570 00:20:26,558 --> 00:20:27,740 Also, she's insane. 571 00:20:27,865 --> 00:20:29,075 You know, it might be the bath salts talking, 572 00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:30,855 - but I love that girl. - Awesome. 573 00:20:31,021 --> 00:20:32,077 Dude, if you're in love with her, 574 00:20:32,202 --> 00:20:35,113 then we need to go find her, like, now. 575 00:20:35,238 --> 00:20:37,282 She spends most of her time under a bridge on 12th street. 576 00:20:37,407 --> 00:20:39,918 She's got a box. It's a good little spot. 577 00:20:40,043 --> 00:20:42,154 Uh, fastest way there is the 405. 578 00:20:42,279 --> 00:20:43,946 Really? 579 00:20:44,326 --> 00:20:46,158 Let's take this thing on the freeway! 580 00:20:46,283 --> 00:20:47,391 - Yeah, baby! - Oh, let's do it! 581 00:20:47,516 --> 00:20:48,625 I wanna suck 582 00:20:48,750 --> 00:20:50,583 Get 'em, Adam. Make 'em go faster. 583 00:20:50,749 --> 00:20:51,595 Suck on your boobs 584 00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:52,629 All right, well, 585 00:20:52,754 --> 00:20:53,864 we're gonna continue going this pace. 586 00:20:53,989 --> 00:20:56,046 - Just two horsepower, so. - Okay. 587 00:20:56,212 --> 00:20:58,048 Sync and correction by Mlmlte www.addic7ed.com 588 00:20:58,098 --> 00:21:02,648 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 42429

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