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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,244 --> 00:00:13,579 ♪ Come and knock on our door ♪ 2 00:00:13,647 --> 00:00:15,091 ♪ Come and knock on our door ♪ 3 00:00:15,115 --> 00:00:16,514 ♪ We've been waitin' for you ♪ 4 00:00:16,584 --> 00:00:18,228 ♪ We've been waitin' for you ♪ 5 00:00:18,252 --> 00:00:20,731 ♪ Where the kisses are hers and hers and his ♪ 6 00:00:20,755 --> 00:00:23,655 ♪ Three's company too ♪ 7 00:00:23,724 --> 00:00:27,070 ♪ Come and dance on our floor ♪ ♪ Come and dance on our floor ♪ 8 00:00:27,094 --> 00:00:30,128 ♪ Take a step that is new ♪ ♪ Take a step that is new ♪ 9 00:00:30,197 --> 00:00:33,365 ♪ We've a loveable space that needs your face ♪ 10 00:00:33,434 --> 00:00:36,201 ♪ Three's company too ♪ 11 00:00:36,270 --> 00:00:39,137 ♪ You'll see that life is a ball again ♪ 12 00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:42,440 ♪ Laughter is calling for you ♪ 13 00:00:42,509 --> 00:00:45,677 ♪ Down at our rendezvous ♪ ♪ Down at our rendezvous ♪ 14 00:00:45,746 --> 00:00:47,846 ♪ Three's company too ♪ 15 00:00:55,088 --> 00:00:58,123 ♪ Down at our rendezvous ♪ ♪ Down at our rendezvous ♪ 16 00:00:58,191 --> 00:01:00,225 ♪ Three's company too ♪ 17 00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:08,099 Come on, Ter, it's your move. 18 00:01:09,870 --> 00:01:11,569 It's open, Larry! 19 00:01:11,639 --> 00:01:14,639 Hi. Listen, I need a quick answer. 20 00:01:14,708 --> 00:01:16,474 My date just cancelled on me. 21 00:01:16,543 --> 00:01:17,775 I made such big plans. 22 00:01:17,844 --> 00:01:19,411 How would you girls like 23 00:01:19,479 --> 00:01:21,158 to have an exotic dinner with me? 24 00:01:21,182 --> 00:01:23,882 Exotic dinner? Sure! 25 00:01:23,950 --> 00:01:25,250 Yeah, sounds wonderful. 26 00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:27,730 That's great. I just spent 6 bucks on Chinese takeout. 27 00:01:27,754 --> 00:01:29,665 I hate to see it go to waste. 28 00:01:29,689 --> 00:01:31,423 Ohh! 29 00:01:31,492 --> 00:01:34,259 Hi, Jan, Ter, Lar. 30 00:01:34,328 --> 00:01:36,261 Woo! Woo! 31 00:01:36,330 --> 00:01:37,473 Please, please, please, please, 32 00:01:37,497 --> 00:01:38,975 please, please, please, please, please. 33 00:01:38,999 --> 00:01:41,733 What, you got a date in a store window? 34 00:01:41,801 --> 00:01:43,201 What did you do, 35 00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:45,348 just fallen off a wedding cake? 36 00:01:45,372 --> 00:01:47,672 No. It just so happens 37 00:01:47,741 --> 00:01:50,041 that I'm going to a charity party tonight 38 00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:52,510 with Miss Jessica Barrish. 39 00:01:52,580 --> 00:01:54,880 Not the Jessica Barrish? 40 00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:56,092 That's right... 41 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:57,661 Queen of the jet-setters. 42 00:01:57,685 --> 00:01:58,817 So what if she's rich? 43 00:01:58,886 --> 00:02:01,019 I'm willing to accept her faults. 44 00:02:01,087 --> 00:02:03,855 What is she doing with you, slumming? 45 00:02:03,924 --> 00:02:04,924 That's funny. 46 00:02:04,991 --> 00:02:07,392 She happens to enjoy my company, Lawrence. 47 00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:10,295 Oh, yeah? Which company did you tell her you owned, 48 00:02:10,364 --> 00:02:12,831 AT&T or just IBM? 49 00:02:12,899 --> 00:02:16,601 That's funny. Listen, Shecky, I got a favor to ask you. 50 00:02:16,670 --> 00:02:18,703 Can I borrow your car for tonight? 51 00:02:18,772 --> 00:02:21,406 Sure. Can I borrow Jessica tomorrow night? 52 00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:22,718 Larry... I'll get the keys. 53 00:02:22,742 --> 00:02:24,276 Come here. 54 00:02:24,344 --> 00:02:25,377 Yeah. 55 00:02:25,445 --> 00:02:26,856 Can I ask you a question? 56 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,981 Of course, Janette, darling, anything. 57 00:02:30,050 --> 00:02:32,650 Does she think that you're rich? 58 00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:36,120 Well, she knows that I own a restaurant, 59 00:02:36,190 --> 00:02:37,755 among other things. 60 00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:39,104 What other things? 61 00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:40,959 We didn't go into details. 62 00:02:41,028 --> 00:02:42,760 She thinks he's rich. 63 00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:44,740 Jack, you are getting in over your head, 64 00:02:44,764 --> 00:02:46,176 pretending to be something you're not. 65 00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:47,332 Terri, I... look, I... 66 00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:49,334 Jack, let me ask you something. 67 00:02:49,402 --> 00:02:51,736 Don't you feel silly trying to keep up 68 00:02:51,805 --> 00:02:53,450 with her and her rich friends? 69 00:02:53,474 --> 00:02:56,041 Janet, I can keep up with that rich crowd just fine. 70 00:02:56,110 --> 00:02:57,476 Now let me ask you something. 71 00:02:57,544 --> 00:02:59,144 Can I borrow $30? 72 00:03:00,981 --> 00:03:02,114 What? 73 00:03:02,183 --> 00:03:04,516 Well, look, it costs $50 per person to get in. 74 00:03:04,585 --> 00:03:07,418 I paid Angelino the rent money, so I'm a little short. 75 00:03:07,488 --> 00:03:10,088 Short? Okay, you can borrow my high heels. 76 00:03:10,156 --> 00:03:12,824 Would you... Janet, please. I'll pay you back Thursday. 77 00:03:12,892 --> 00:03:13,925 Please, please. 78 00:03:13,994 --> 00:03:15,460 Give it to him, Janet. 79 00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:17,706 I can't stand to see a grown man cry. 80 00:03:17,730 --> 00:03:18,997 Okay, okay. Okay. 81 00:03:19,066 --> 00:03:20,076 All right, all right, all right. 82 00:03:20,100 --> 00:03:21,199 Thank you so much. 83 00:03:21,268 --> 00:03:23,213 I've only got a couple of 20s, Terri. 84 00:03:23,237 --> 00:03:24,413 You think you have change? 85 00:03:24,437 --> 00:03:25,849 Let me just take a look. 86 00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:27,472 You guys are great. You see that? 87 00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:29,174 You're real friends, you know? 88 00:03:32,112 --> 00:03:34,146 Surprise. 89 00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:36,548 Jessica. Uh, hi. 90 00:03:36,617 --> 00:03:39,795 Uh, you were supposed to meet me at my restaurant. 91 00:03:39,819 --> 00:03:41,286 Well, I got there early, 92 00:03:41,355 --> 00:03:42,954 and I couldn't wait to see you, 93 00:03:43,023 --> 00:03:45,123 so I asked your helper where to find you, 94 00:03:45,192 --> 00:03:47,292 and here I am. I hope you don't mind. 95 00:03:47,361 --> 00:03:48,441 Well, uh... 96 00:03:48,495 --> 00:03:50,228 You don't live here, do you? 97 00:03:50,297 --> 00:03:51,441 Yes. What? 98 00:03:51,465 --> 00:03:53,009 Yes, I don't live here. 99 00:03:53,033 --> 00:03:54,366 Oh. 100 00:03:54,435 --> 00:03:56,634 I thought not. 101 00:03:56,703 --> 00:03:58,403 Okay, Jack, here's your money. 102 00:03:58,472 --> 00:04:00,038 Oh, thank you, thank you. 103 00:04:00,107 --> 00:04:03,175 Uh... and if you're ever late with the rent again, 104 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:04,575 it's sidewalk time. 105 00:04:04,644 --> 00:04:05,577 What? 106 00:04:05,646 --> 00:04:06,646 You heard me. 107 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:08,146 Did I tell you 108 00:04:08,215 --> 00:04:09,581 I also dabble in real estate? 109 00:04:09,649 --> 00:04:10,849 Oh. 110 00:04:10,918 --> 00:04:14,953 Give these tenants an inch, they'll rob you blind. 111 00:04:15,022 --> 00:04:16,855 Well, well... 112 00:04:16,924 --> 00:04:20,270 My, my, my. Who's this vision of loveliness? 113 00:04:20,294 --> 00:04:23,662 That's Miss Barrish to you, Lawrence. 114 00:04:23,730 --> 00:04:27,231 And out of uniform again. Look at this. My chauffeur. 115 00:04:28,836 --> 00:04:31,670 He's, uh... You'll have to excuse his manners. 116 00:04:31,738 --> 00:04:34,573 He's totally lost when he's not behind the wheel. 117 00:04:34,641 --> 00:04:36,007 I'm so sorry, sir. 118 00:04:36,076 --> 00:04:38,343 I... I got carried away. 119 00:04:38,411 --> 00:04:40,177 No problem, Lawrence. Very good. 120 00:04:40,246 --> 00:04:42,013 We won't be needing you this evening. 121 00:04:42,081 --> 00:04:43,915 We're going to use Miss Barrish's car. 122 00:04:43,983 --> 00:04:45,083 Very good, sir. 123 00:04:45,152 --> 00:04:47,719 Oh. About tomorrow, sir. 124 00:04:47,787 --> 00:04:50,027 Will you be using the Caddy or the Rolls? 125 00:04:52,226 --> 00:04:53,659 The... The Rolls. 126 00:04:53,727 --> 00:04:55,393 Very good, sir. 127 00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:57,195 The blue or the green? 128 00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:01,733 It doesn't matter. 129 00:05:01,802 --> 00:05:04,369 Top up or down? Get out! 130 00:05:04,438 --> 00:05:06,478 Whatever you say, sir. 131 00:05:07,608 --> 00:05:10,408 So hard to get decent help nowadays, isn't it? 132 00:05:10,477 --> 00:05:12,176 Oh, dear. Shall we go? 133 00:05:12,246 --> 00:05:14,879 Uh, Mr. Tripper, sir, may we have a word with you? 134 00:05:14,948 --> 00:05:16,648 Oh, that's all right. 135 00:05:16,717 --> 00:05:19,217 I'll let you finish your business. 136 00:05:19,286 --> 00:05:20,619 I'll wait downstairs. 137 00:05:20,688 --> 00:05:24,255 I... I hate to leave my Jaguar alone in this neighborhood. 138 00:05:24,325 --> 00:05:26,391 Lordy, I know what you mean. 139 00:05:28,561 --> 00:05:29,760 What? 140 00:05:29,829 --> 00:05:31,730 So, Muffin... 141 00:05:31,798 --> 00:05:33,598 now we're just tenants. 142 00:05:33,666 --> 00:05:35,266 Yes, Binkie. 143 00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:37,702 A minute ago, we were his friends. 144 00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:39,983 I didn't know what to tell her. 145 00:05:40,007 --> 00:05:42,251 Try telling her the truth, Jack, that you're not rich. 146 00:05:42,275 --> 00:05:44,709 Yeah, she's bound to find out sooner or later. 147 00:05:44,778 --> 00:05:46,289 Then I don't have to tell her. 148 00:05:46,313 --> 00:05:47,445 Oh, Jack! 149 00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:50,014 You'd better tell her the truth tonight. 150 00:05:50,084 --> 00:05:51,783 Okay, okay. 151 00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:53,996 I'll tell her that I don't have any money, 152 00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:55,898 because you tenants are robbing me blind. 153 00:05:55,922 --> 00:05:57,822 Oh, Jack! Come back here... 154 00:06:00,327 --> 00:06:04,662 Number 6 a winner! Number 6 a winner! 155 00:06:08,535 --> 00:06:09,815 There she goes. 156 00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:11,981 Where she stops nobody knows. 157 00:06:12,005 --> 00:06:15,440 Okay, number 28 black is the winner. 158 00:06:15,509 --> 00:06:16,874 Number 28. 159 00:06:22,149 --> 00:06:24,415 Sure. Here you go, Barry... 160 00:06:24,484 --> 00:06:26,284 15,000 in chips. 161 00:06:26,353 --> 00:06:27,285 15,000? 162 00:06:27,354 --> 00:06:28,286 That's what everybody gets 163 00:06:28,355 --> 00:06:29,532 with the price of admission. 164 00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:31,423 Too bad it isn't real money. 165 00:06:31,491 --> 00:06:34,692 Ha ha! I wouldn't be giving it away then. 166 00:06:34,761 --> 00:06:35,827 Sign here. 167 00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:37,195 For play money? 168 00:06:37,264 --> 00:06:38,908 We've got to keep a strict count. 169 00:06:38,932 --> 00:06:41,310 Whoever wins the most at the end of the night 170 00:06:41,334 --> 00:06:42,267 wins the prize. 171 00:06:42,335 --> 00:06:43,634 Oh. All right. 172 00:06:46,673 --> 00:06:48,317 Good evening, Miss Barrish. 173 00:06:48,341 --> 00:06:49,407 Hello, Evelyn. 174 00:06:49,475 --> 00:06:51,542 Hello, Evelyn. I'm Jack Tripper. 175 00:06:51,611 --> 00:06:52,711 Here's my donation. 176 00:06:52,779 --> 00:06:53,712 Thank you. 177 00:06:53,780 --> 00:06:54,845 My pleasure. 178 00:06:57,417 --> 00:07:00,217 Wow! Your father lives here? 179 00:07:00,286 --> 00:07:01,686 Yes. 180 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:04,322 It's, uh... nice. 181 00:07:04,390 --> 00:07:06,469 Now that he's all alone, 182 00:07:06,493 --> 00:07:08,671 he really doesn't need a big place. 183 00:07:10,196 --> 00:07:11,307 Champagne? 184 00:07:11,331 --> 00:07:12,263 You got any beer? 185 00:07:12,332 --> 00:07:13,531 Beer? 186 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:16,667 It's just for later so I can shampoo my hair. 187 00:07:16,736 --> 00:07:19,437 That's okay, Jack. I like beer, too. 188 00:07:19,506 --> 00:07:21,551 You know, that's what I love about you... 189 00:07:21,575 --> 00:07:23,786 You're so down-to-earth and unpretentious. 190 00:07:23,810 --> 00:07:27,211 Well, it's just something I picked up at prep school. 191 00:07:27,281 --> 00:07:28,880 Champagne? 192 00:07:28,949 --> 00:07:29,881 Mm. 193 00:07:29,950 --> 00:07:31,049 My pleasure. 194 00:07:31,118 --> 00:07:33,584 Oh, I have such exciting plans for us... 195 00:07:33,653 --> 00:07:35,365 Opening night at the opera, 196 00:07:35,389 --> 00:07:37,500 the Grand Prix in Monte Carlo, 197 00:07:37,524 --> 00:07:40,737 skiing the slopes of St. Moritz in the springtime. 198 00:07:40,761 --> 00:07:41,993 St. Moritz? 199 00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:44,428 You will be able to get away, won't you? 200 00:07:44,497 --> 00:07:45,696 Get away. 201 00:07:45,766 --> 00:07:47,098 Uh... 202 00:07:47,167 --> 00:07:49,834 Jessica, there's something I have to tell you. 203 00:07:49,903 --> 00:07:51,180 It means a lot for me 204 00:07:51,204 --> 00:07:52,615 to be able to share these things 205 00:07:52,639 --> 00:07:54,451 with a man who's going to be my lover. 206 00:07:54,475 --> 00:07:57,108 Jessica, I'm not real... Your lover? 207 00:07:57,177 --> 00:07:58,376 Yes. 208 00:07:58,445 --> 00:08:00,323 Well, now, the prospect doesn't bother you, 209 00:08:00,347 --> 00:08:01,379 does it? 210 00:08:01,448 --> 00:08:03,481 No, no, not at all. 211 00:08:03,550 --> 00:08:06,651 Now, what were you going to say about St. Moritz? 212 00:08:06,719 --> 00:08:09,120 I'll start waxing my skis tomorrow. 213 00:08:10,890 --> 00:08:12,935 Jessica, darling, how are you? 214 00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:14,158 Oh, hello, Bradley. 215 00:08:14,228 --> 00:08:17,395 Jack, this is Bradley and Veronica Hastings. 216 00:08:17,464 --> 00:08:18,396 Delighted. 217 00:08:18,465 --> 00:08:19,397 Brad. Veron. 218 00:08:19,466 --> 00:08:20,666 Hello. 219 00:08:21,801 --> 00:08:24,001 They're Hastings Tissues. 220 00:08:24,070 --> 00:08:27,338 Hastings Tiss-yues? Oh, yes. 221 00:08:27,407 --> 00:08:30,108 I use them quite regularly, I must say. 222 00:08:30,176 --> 00:08:32,310 I see all your commer-see-als. 223 00:08:32,379 --> 00:08:35,313 How do they go? Uh... uh... 224 00:08:35,382 --> 00:08:38,550 ♪ All Hasting Tissues are two blows thick ♪ 225 00:08:38,618 --> 00:08:41,819 ♪ So reach for a Hastings when you are sick ♪ 226 00:08:41,888 --> 00:08:43,821 Pppt-ppt, ppt-ppt! 227 00:08:43,891 --> 00:08:44,822 Whoop! 228 00:08:44,892 --> 00:08:45,892 Whoops! 229 00:08:48,728 --> 00:08:49,927 That's marvelous. 230 00:08:49,996 --> 00:08:52,096 Love to have you come down to the house 231 00:08:52,165 --> 00:08:53,297 and sing that for Daddy. 232 00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:55,399 He wrote the damn thing. 233 00:08:55,468 --> 00:08:57,614 Where have you been hiding this one? 234 00:08:57,638 --> 00:08:58,903 I'm not talking. 235 00:08:58,972 --> 00:09:01,350 Well, you must bring him to our party next Friday. 236 00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:02,619 See you then. 237 00:09:02,643 --> 00:09:04,709 Wonderful. Nice to meet you, B, V. 238 00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:05,844 Take care. 239 00:09:09,116 --> 00:09:11,116 You made a hit. My friends like you. 240 00:09:11,184 --> 00:09:13,562 Well, I must have them come up to my house 241 00:09:13,586 --> 00:09:14,886 and play a polo match. 242 00:09:14,955 --> 00:09:17,622 We can all horse around or something like that. 243 00:09:17,691 --> 00:09:21,025 Jessica! I didn't see you come in. 244 00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:22,627 Hi, Dad. 245 00:09:22,696 --> 00:09:23,940 Is this the thief? Huh? 246 00:09:23,964 --> 00:09:26,404 The one who stole my daughter's heart? 247 00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:30,635 Oh, Dad. 248 00:09:30,704 --> 00:09:32,537 Jack, this is my father. 249 00:09:32,606 --> 00:09:33,805 Pleasure to meet you, sir. 250 00:09:33,874 --> 00:09:36,274 Don't be too sure. You don't know me yet. 251 00:09:39,178 --> 00:09:41,613 It seems like a nice turnout, Dad. 252 00:09:41,681 --> 00:09:43,292 Yes, everything's going just fine. 253 00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:45,094 A couple of the waitresses didn't show up, 254 00:09:45,118 --> 00:09:46,451 so I've been filling in. 255 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:48,680 Well, it's better than filling out, isn't it? 256 00:09:50,323 --> 00:09:52,690 Oh, that's a good one! 257 00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:55,304 Jessica, you've finally picked a winner. 258 00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:56,528 Hyah! Oh. 259 00:09:58,865 --> 00:10:00,776 Jack, it's good to have you with us. 260 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:01,732 Thank you. 261 00:10:01,801 --> 00:10:03,045 You wouldn't believe 262 00:10:03,069 --> 00:10:04,881 some of the phonies she's brought home. 263 00:10:04,905 --> 00:10:07,172 Oh, I knew you'd like him. 264 00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:09,384 Well, you're not gonna make any money standing around here, 265 00:10:09,408 --> 00:10:10,528 so come with me. 266 00:10:10,577 --> 00:10:11,943 Sure. 267 00:10:12,011 --> 00:10:13,110 We'll set you up. 268 00:10:13,180 --> 00:10:14,180 Okay. 269 00:10:14,214 --> 00:10:17,381 Here's 15,000 in chips. Enjoy. 270 00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:19,550 $15,000? 271 00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:20,918 Fiftee... f-fitty thousa doll... 272 00:10:20,987 --> 00:10:22,386 $15,000? $15,000? 273 00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:23,565 Something wrong? 274 00:10:24,724 --> 00:10:26,924 $15,000? $15,000. 275 00:10:26,993 --> 00:10:28,359 No, it's just that I thought 276 00:10:28,427 --> 00:10:30,361 this was gonna be a real game. 277 00:10:30,430 --> 00:10:31,796 A real game! 278 00:10:31,865 --> 00:10:33,242 I like him. Sign here. 279 00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:34,198 Huh? 280 00:10:34,267 --> 00:10:35,678 We've got to keep a record, 281 00:10:35,702 --> 00:10:37,213 so sign your real name. 282 00:10:37,237 --> 00:10:40,338 Oh. Here we go. 283 00:10:40,406 --> 00:10:42,173 Thank you very much, sir. 284 00:10:42,242 --> 00:10:44,041 Look at this... $15,000. 285 00:10:44,110 --> 00:10:45,276 Enjoy! 286 00:10:46,346 --> 00:10:47,278 My chip. 287 00:10:47,347 --> 00:10:48,424 Oh, sorry. Those are my... 288 00:10:48,448 --> 00:10:49,380 Hey, freeze! 289 00:10:49,449 --> 00:10:50,381 Oh, I'm sorry. 290 00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:52,149 No problem. I don't... 291 00:10:52,218 --> 00:10:55,520 I don't want you to exert yourself, you know. 292 00:10:55,589 --> 00:10:58,923 I'll get... Those? No, those are yours, okay. 293 00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:01,926 Let the chips fall where they may. 294 00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:03,227 Let's play some roulette. 295 00:11:03,296 --> 00:11:05,508 Number 7 red is a winner. 296 00:11:05,532 --> 00:11:06,997 Number 7 red. 297 00:11:07,066 --> 00:11:08,644 Well, there goes another 10,000. 298 00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:11,769 But as long as you're having fun. 299 00:11:11,838 --> 00:11:14,705 That's what I always say. 300 00:11:14,775 --> 00:11:16,007 Well, what shall we bet? 301 00:11:16,076 --> 00:11:20,711 Uh... well, I'll bet a dollar on, uh... 302 00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:23,314 That's a hundred dollar chip, sir. 303 00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:25,783 A hun... 304 00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:27,597 Uh, do you have change? 305 00:11:27,621 --> 00:11:29,520 $100 is the minimum bet, sir. 306 00:11:29,589 --> 00:11:31,367 Oh! Oh, yes, of course, of course. 307 00:11:31,391 --> 00:11:33,069 You don't have any micro-chips, do you? 308 00:11:33,093 --> 00:11:35,237 Little ones? No? Okay, let's see. 309 00:11:35,261 --> 00:11:36,472 Uh, 8's my lucky number, 310 00:11:36,496 --> 00:11:37,628 so why don't we do... 311 00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:38,874 Wait. Hang on one second. 312 00:11:38,898 --> 00:11:39,830 You know something? 313 00:11:39,899 --> 00:11:41,310 17. That's my birthday, the 17th. 314 00:11:41,334 --> 00:11:44,102 Can't go wrong there. One second. 315 00:11:44,170 --> 00:11:45,903 What month is September? 9, right? 316 00:11:45,972 --> 00:11:47,838 Let me do 9 for sure. Where's 9? 317 00:11:47,907 --> 00:11:50,075 There. Little 9. 318 00:11:50,143 --> 00:11:51,076 Jack. Yeah? 319 00:11:51,144 --> 00:11:52,444 You're holding up the table. 320 00:11:52,512 --> 00:11:54,657 Maybe... You know something? Let me do 100 on the red. 321 00:11:54,681 --> 00:11:55,613 No problem. 322 00:11:55,682 --> 00:11:57,048 And, uh, to play it safe, 323 00:11:57,117 --> 00:11:58,516 100 on the black. 324 00:11:58,584 --> 00:12:01,886 Betting on both colors? You can't win that way. 325 00:12:01,955 --> 00:12:04,922 Oh. Then, uh, why bother? 326 00:12:04,991 --> 00:12:06,090 Spin it. 327 00:12:07,294 --> 00:12:09,226 Maybe you'd like something 328 00:12:09,296 --> 00:12:11,596 a little more exciting. 329 00:12:11,665 --> 00:12:13,998 Oh, I would, I would. 330 00:12:14,066 --> 00:12:15,866 Craps is much more fun. 331 00:12:15,935 --> 00:12:17,568 Oh. Craps. 332 00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:22,173 Number 3 the winner, number 3. 333 00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:23,674 We're looking for a new shooter. 334 00:12:23,744 --> 00:12:24,675 Right here. 335 00:12:24,745 --> 00:12:26,025 Reach for the sky. 336 00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:28,579 Oh, I see. Oh, me? 337 00:12:28,648 --> 00:12:31,049 Uh... okay. 338 00:12:31,118 --> 00:12:32,951 Come on, 7-11. 339 00:12:33,019 --> 00:12:35,086 You have to place a bet first. 340 00:12:35,155 --> 00:12:36,921 Oh, I knew that. 341 00:12:36,990 --> 00:12:39,357 Just, uh, being jocular. 342 00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:41,893 Let's see, uh, eeny-meeny-miney... 343 00:12:41,962 --> 00:12:44,629 Uh, why don't you let me place the bet? 344 00:12:44,697 --> 00:12:46,164 I feel lucky. 345 00:12:46,233 --> 00:12:47,698 Sure, go ahead. 346 00:12:48,769 --> 00:12:49,868 Bet it all. 347 00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:50,936 All? 348 00:12:52,506 --> 00:12:55,272 Snake eyes. You lose. 349 00:12:55,341 --> 00:12:56,585 I didn't mean... Wait a minute. 350 00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:57,887 No, no. That was a mis... 351 00:12:57,911 --> 00:12:59,155 Sir, could I speak... That was... 352 00:12:59,179 --> 00:13:00,256 Lose all your money? 353 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:01,679 The man took the mon... 354 00:13:01,748 --> 00:13:06,084 Well, easy come, easy go! 355 00:13:16,729 --> 00:13:19,230 Isn't this great? 356 00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:23,835 Yeah. Nothing like eating out of a paper box. 357 00:13:23,903 --> 00:13:26,181 Actually, Larry, when you asked us out to dinner tonight, 358 00:13:26,205 --> 00:13:28,572 I was kind of hoping we'd get out of the apartment. 359 00:13:28,642 --> 00:13:29,774 Well, if Terri doesn't mind, 360 00:13:29,843 --> 00:13:32,210 you and I could take this stuff up to my place. 361 00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:36,847 Just a thought. 362 00:13:40,420 --> 00:13:41,597 Hey, Jack! 363 00:13:41,621 --> 00:13:43,454 Hi, guys. What's happenin'. 364 00:13:45,224 --> 00:13:47,036 What are you doing home so early? 365 00:13:47,060 --> 00:13:52,329 Oh, it's just that the party was so boring. 366 00:13:52,398 --> 00:13:54,577 Oh. Why don't you come join us? Come here. 367 00:13:54,601 --> 00:13:56,281 No, thanks. I'm not hungry. 368 00:13:58,738 --> 00:14:00,872 All right, girls. Now for some fun! 369 00:14:00,941 --> 00:14:03,874 It's fortune cookie time. 370 00:14:03,943 --> 00:14:08,112 Oh, enough, Larry. You're spoiling us. 371 00:14:09,315 --> 00:14:10,848 No, no, no. This came with the dinner. 372 00:14:13,886 --> 00:14:15,186 Let me see here. 373 00:14:15,255 --> 00:14:18,189 "A fool and his money are soon parted." 374 00:14:22,996 --> 00:14:26,563 "True love has no price tag." 375 00:14:30,336 --> 00:14:31,802 "Confucious say: 376 00:14:31,872 --> 00:14:35,206 "man who has money to burn makes an ash of himself." 377 00:14:40,847 --> 00:14:42,458 Jack, what's the matter? 378 00:14:45,618 --> 00:14:47,530 Come on. What's the matter? 379 00:14:47,554 --> 00:14:48,965 Come on. Oh, Janet. 380 00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:51,922 The party wasn't boring. I snuck out. 381 00:14:51,992 --> 00:14:53,469 I didn't even say goodbye to Jessica. 382 00:14:53,493 --> 00:14:57,462 Why not? They had gambling there. 383 00:14:57,530 --> 00:14:59,363 Oh, yeah? How'd you do, pal? 384 00:14:59,432 --> 00:15:02,767 I lost $15,000. 385 00:15:02,835 --> 00:15:05,370 $15,000? 386 00:15:05,438 --> 00:15:07,805 You don't have $15,000. 387 00:15:07,874 --> 00:15:09,874 I know, but Mr. Barrish made me sign for it 388 00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:13,544 and now I have to come up with $15,000. 389 00:15:17,050 --> 00:15:21,385 Don't look at me. I just blew my whole wad on this dinner. 390 00:15:21,454 --> 00:15:23,054 Larry! 391 00:15:24,190 --> 00:15:25,790 Jack... 392 00:15:25,858 --> 00:15:27,725 I lost every... 393 00:15:27,794 --> 00:15:29,038 Wait a minute. What's this? 394 00:15:29,062 --> 00:15:31,329 Oh, I forgot about these. 395 00:15:31,398 --> 00:15:33,331 Hey, hey! We're back in business! 396 00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,299 Larry, this is only $400. 397 00:15:35,368 --> 00:15:36,912 That's all we need to win your money back. 398 00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:39,976 Are you crazy? That's how he got into the mess in the first place. 399 00:15:40,039 --> 00:15:41,606 Don't you see? 400 00:15:41,674 --> 00:15:43,140 He didn't know what he was doing. 401 00:15:43,209 --> 00:15:45,943 But with me by his side, we'll win all his money back. 402 00:15:46,012 --> 00:15:47,089 How can I do that? 403 00:15:47,113 --> 00:15:50,881 I have a system! He has a system! 404 00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:52,894 No time to talk, Janet. Larry's gotta get changed. 405 00:15:52,918 --> 00:15:54,263 You got a tux? Got a tux. 406 00:15:54,287 --> 00:15:55,931 He's got a tux and he's got a system. 407 00:15:55,955 --> 00:15:57,421 Work with me, Larry. 408 00:15:59,359 --> 00:16:01,158 Do you think they'll win his money back? 409 00:16:01,227 --> 00:16:02,271 Are you kidding? 410 00:16:02,295 --> 00:16:04,261 Okay. Then it's up to us. 411 00:16:04,330 --> 00:16:06,497 We're gonna have to talk to Jessica's father. 412 00:16:06,565 --> 00:16:08,332 We'll tell him that Jack got carried away 413 00:16:08,401 --> 00:16:10,146 and he doesn't really have that kind of money. 414 00:16:10,170 --> 00:16:11,914 Do you think he'll buy that? 415 00:16:11,938 --> 00:16:14,439 Terri, this is a charity affair. 416 00:16:14,507 --> 00:16:16,173 All they want to do is raise some money. 417 00:16:16,242 --> 00:16:17,909 They don't want to get anybody in trouble. 418 00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:21,078 Oh, I don't know if it'll do any good. 419 00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:23,981 Would you rather leave it up to the Chinese takeout artist? 420 00:16:24,049 --> 00:16:26,150 Let's go. 421 00:16:33,827 --> 00:16:35,404 Seven. A winner. 422 00:16:35,428 --> 00:16:37,295 Oh, wow. Look at this place. 423 00:16:39,532 --> 00:16:40,843 Just a moment. Huh? 424 00:16:40,867 --> 00:16:42,700 Where are your tickets? 425 00:16:42,769 --> 00:16:44,379 Oh, um, we're not guests. 426 00:16:44,403 --> 00:16:46,515 No, no. We just have to see Mr. Barrish. 427 00:16:46,539 --> 00:16:49,106 Oh, you should have been here hours ago. 428 00:16:49,175 --> 00:16:50,285 What? 429 00:16:50,309 --> 00:16:51,942 The kitchen's back that way. 430 00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:53,911 You'll find your waitress uniforms there. 431 00:16:53,980 --> 00:16:56,447 Waitress uniforms? 432 00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:58,160 No, you see, we're... We're, uh, changing. 433 00:16:58,184 --> 00:17:00,024 Changing right now. Come on, Terri. 434 00:17:03,555 --> 00:17:06,523 What did I tell you? Look at this place. 435 00:17:09,662 --> 00:17:11,206 Well, hello again, Evelyn. 436 00:17:11,230 --> 00:17:12,607 Welcome back, Mr. Tripper. 437 00:17:12,631 --> 00:17:15,332 Nice to be back. Thank you, thank you. Evie. 438 00:17:15,401 --> 00:17:18,569 Excuse me, sir. Do you have a ticket? 439 00:17:18,638 --> 00:17:20,871 How much are they? $50. 440 00:17:20,940 --> 00:17:22,974 Even for the press? 441 00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:25,843 Oh, are you with a newspaper? 442 00:17:25,912 --> 00:17:27,232 You better go in without me, Jack. 443 00:17:27,279 --> 00:17:30,147 I should be covering that party at the Western White House. 444 00:17:30,216 --> 00:17:32,216 Oh, wait, please. 445 00:17:32,285 --> 00:17:35,286 Mr.? Scoop Dallas is the name. 446 00:17:37,022 --> 00:17:39,590 Mr. Dallas, could you give us a few minutes? 447 00:17:39,659 --> 00:17:42,293 It's a very, very worthy cause. 448 00:17:42,362 --> 00:17:45,463 Well, if it's for a worthy cause... 449 00:17:45,531 --> 00:17:47,309 Do you have any complimentary chips? 450 00:17:47,333 --> 00:17:49,614 Excuse me. Come on, Scooper. 451 00:17:57,643 --> 00:18:01,012 Now how do we find out which one Jessica's father is? 452 00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:02,513 We'll ask somebody. 453 00:18:02,581 --> 00:18:04,114 Why didn't I think of that? 454 00:18:05,818 --> 00:18:07,150 Excuse me, sir. 455 00:18:07,220 --> 00:18:08,952 Well, well. 456 00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:11,622 A tasty dish carrying a tasty dish. 457 00:18:11,691 --> 00:18:14,991 I don't know which one to try first! 458 00:18:15,060 --> 00:18:16,393 Try this. 459 00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:23,267 Four, four! A field roll four. 460 00:18:23,336 --> 00:18:26,381 Hurry up, Larry. How long does it take for this system of yours to get started? 461 00:18:26,405 --> 00:18:27,549 Jack. What do I bet on? 462 00:18:27,573 --> 00:18:29,106 I'm working on it. Let's see. 463 00:18:29,175 --> 00:18:31,809 First a five came up, then a nine. 464 00:18:31,878 --> 00:18:34,912 Then a craps, then that gorgeous redhead passed by. 465 00:18:34,981 --> 00:18:36,358 Larry, would you get on top of this? 466 00:18:36,382 --> 00:18:37,414 Okay, all right. 467 00:18:37,483 --> 00:18:39,083 Bet it all on 11. 468 00:18:39,152 --> 00:18:41,163 Maybe it's nine. What? 469 00:18:41,187 --> 00:18:43,888 11.11 a winner! 11! 470 00:18:43,957 --> 00:18:45,089 I won! I won! 471 00:18:45,157 --> 00:18:47,358 You see, my system works every time. 472 00:18:47,426 --> 00:18:50,194 Larry, look at that. I doubled my money! 473 00:18:50,263 --> 00:18:52,129 We'll never find him at this rate. 474 00:18:52,197 --> 00:18:53,275 I know. 475 00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:55,466 Oh, there's Mr. Barrish now. Oh, Good. 476 00:18:55,535 --> 00:18:58,268 Wait! I'm not done! 477 00:18:58,337 --> 00:19:00,437 Oh, here. 478 00:19:02,174 --> 00:19:03,340 Hors d'oeuvre? 479 00:19:03,409 --> 00:19:05,889 No, I'd rather have something to eat. 480 00:19:10,182 --> 00:19:13,618 Wow. People really seem to be having fun at this party. 481 00:19:13,686 --> 00:19:15,319 Well, that's the idea. 482 00:19:15,388 --> 00:19:18,089 Yeah, but it probably wouldn't be too much fun 483 00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:20,958 if somebody lost a whole lot of money gambling. 484 00:19:21,027 --> 00:19:22,404 Why not? Well... 485 00:19:22,428 --> 00:19:24,227 You know, if they couldn't afford it. 486 00:19:24,296 --> 00:19:26,130 Couldn't afford it? 487 00:19:26,199 --> 00:19:27,977 We're not playing with real money. 488 00:19:28,001 --> 00:19:29,566 You're not? 489 00:19:29,636 --> 00:19:31,168 No, this is for fun. 490 00:19:31,237 --> 00:19:34,738 Now who would be stupid enough to think this was for real? 491 00:19:34,807 --> 00:19:36,173 I won again! 492 00:19:37,476 --> 00:19:38,876 Look at this, Larry. 493 00:19:38,945 --> 00:19:41,712 I won back everything I lost. We can go home now. 494 00:19:41,780 --> 00:19:44,982 Whoa! When you're on a roll, let it ride. No, no... 495 00:19:45,051 --> 00:19:47,117 Guaranteed, Jack. Jack, I'm telling you... 496 00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:48,297 Let... Yikes! 497 00:19:48,321 --> 00:19:50,321 11! Another winner! 498 00:19:51,957 --> 00:19:54,658 See, you just have to know what you're doing, you know? 499 00:19:54,727 --> 00:19:57,628 Okay, talk to me again. Make it work. 500 00:19:57,696 --> 00:20:00,130 Move it, mama! Aye! 501 00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:02,933 Seven, a natural! Seven! A natural. 502 00:20:03,002 --> 00:20:07,638 But that's $30,000. Ahh! 503 00:20:10,109 --> 00:20:11,042 Pssst! 504 00:20:11,110 --> 00:20:13,143 Leave him alone. He's hot. 505 00:20:13,212 --> 00:20:16,280 Luck, you'd better be some kind of lady tonight. 506 00:20:17,816 --> 00:20:21,252 Seven! Another winner! Seven! 507 00:20:21,321 --> 00:20:22,520 I did it again! 508 00:20:22,588 --> 00:20:24,888 Partners. Remember, partners. 509 00:20:24,957 --> 00:20:26,134 I have to talk to you. 510 00:20:26,158 --> 00:20:27,758 Not now, he's on a roll. 511 00:20:27,827 --> 00:20:30,828 Hum baby, hum baby, hum baby, hye... 512 00:20:30,896 --> 00:20:33,363 Yo, 11! Yo, 11! 513 00:20:33,432 --> 00:20:34,443 Look at this. 514 00:20:34,467 --> 00:20:36,178 Excuse me, who needs your tissues. 515 00:20:36,202 --> 00:20:37,746 From now on, I'm gonna blow my nose 516 00:20:37,770 --> 00:20:40,438 in $100 bills. Excuse me! 517 00:20:42,608 --> 00:20:44,252 Jack. 518 00:20:44,276 --> 00:20:46,121 You came back. Oh, did I ever. 519 00:20:46,145 --> 00:20:48,112 Look at all this money I won! 520 00:20:48,181 --> 00:20:49,780 Ya-ya-ya-ya-yahoo! 521 00:20:49,849 --> 00:20:51,994 Jack, you're making a fool of yourself. 522 00:20:52,018 --> 00:20:53,896 You know perfectly well this isn't real money. 523 00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:56,053 Maybe not to you, but to a poor guy like me, 524 00:20:56,122 --> 00:20:57,487 this is a fortune. 525 00:20:57,556 --> 00:21:00,657 Poor? Well, I was, but not anymore. 526 00:21:00,727 --> 00:21:02,905 You mean you lied to me? 527 00:21:02,929 --> 00:21:05,763 Just a little bit. I will make it up to you in St. Moritz. 528 00:21:05,832 --> 00:21:07,998 Okay, come on. Yap yap yap, yap yap yap. Ah-ha! 529 00:21:09,235 --> 00:21:12,135 Seven! Another winner! Seven! 530 00:21:12,205 --> 00:21:15,072 Jack! There is over $100,000 here! 531 00:21:15,140 --> 00:21:16,707 I'm rich! I'm rich! 532 00:21:16,775 --> 00:21:18,442 We're rich! We're rich! 533 00:21:20,913 --> 00:21:22,791 God, look at this. Look at this. 534 00:21:22,815 --> 00:21:25,081 Jack! Jack! 535 00:21:25,150 --> 00:21:27,162 Janet, Terri, what are you doing here? 536 00:21:27,186 --> 00:21:28,452 It's about the money. 537 00:21:28,521 --> 00:21:31,032 Oh, yeah. Your $30. Here you go, sweetheart. 538 00:21:31,056 --> 00:21:32,734 Keep the change. Interest. 539 00:21:32,758 --> 00:21:34,503 Give something to the blonde woman, Larry. 540 00:21:34,527 --> 00:21:37,487 There you go. There's more where that came from. 541 00:21:37,863 --> 00:21:41,532 Well, you're certainly the big winner tonight. 542 00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:43,934 You said it, Pops, and you can say it again. 543 00:21:47,039 --> 00:21:48,405 Ladies and gentlemen, 544 00:21:48,474 --> 00:21:51,408 the big winner tonight is Mr. Jack Tripper. 545 00:21:51,477 --> 00:21:54,357 There you go. Thank you. 546 00:21:57,650 --> 00:22:00,562 Uh, sorta empty isn't it? Where's the money? 547 00:22:00,586 --> 00:22:02,419 The cup is the prize. 548 00:22:03,789 --> 00:22:06,056 Is this worth $100,000? 549 00:22:06,124 --> 00:22:07,591 Of course not. 550 00:22:07,660 --> 00:22:10,394 Wait a minute. Huh? 551 00:22:10,463 --> 00:22:14,965 Don't tell me you thought you were gambling for real money? 552 00:22:16,502 --> 00:22:17,634 Listen, everybody! 553 00:22:17,703 --> 00:22:20,570 He thought he was playing for real money! 554 00:22:28,514 --> 00:22:30,013 Jessica, listen. I... 555 00:22:30,082 --> 00:22:32,416 Come, Jessica. There's someone I want you to meet. 556 00:22:32,485 --> 00:22:34,017 Gladly. 557 00:22:37,489 --> 00:22:38,534 See that, Larry? 558 00:22:38,558 --> 00:22:40,235 Everybody's walking out on me. 559 00:22:40,259 --> 00:22:42,426 You talking to me, stranger? 560 00:22:47,266 --> 00:22:48,666 Oh, Jack. 561 00:22:48,734 --> 00:22:50,968 This is the worst night of my life. 562 00:22:51,037 --> 00:22:53,015 Come on. It's not that bad. 563 00:22:53,039 --> 00:22:55,105 Yeah. Come on. Cheer up. 564 00:22:55,174 --> 00:22:57,107 Ch... Terri. 565 00:22:57,176 --> 00:23:00,143 I lost my girl, I lost my self-respect, 566 00:23:00,212 --> 00:23:01,779 I lost my play money. 567 00:23:03,482 --> 00:23:07,084 The only consolation is, I don't have anything else to lose. 568 00:23:07,152 --> 00:23:08,418 Wait a minute! 569 00:23:08,487 --> 00:23:10,988 It was my system, it's my cup. 570 00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:28,705 Okay. 571 00:23:33,613 --> 00:23:34,945 Hi. Hi. 572 00:23:35,014 --> 00:23:36,279 You wanna go home now? 573 00:23:37,717 --> 00:23:40,618 I'd like to go into a deep hole and never come out. 574 00:23:40,686 --> 00:23:44,154 Oh, come on. At least you learned a lesson from all this. 575 00:23:44,223 --> 00:23:46,724 That I did. Yeah. 576 00:23:46,792 --> 00:23:49,092 Don't try to be something that you're not. 577 00:23:49,162 --> 00:23:51,362 And don't ever lie about yourself. 578 00:23:51,430 --> 00:23:53,363 Try to remember that. 579 00:23:53,433 --> 00:23:54,931 Excuse me. 580 00:23:55,001 --> 00:23:56,333 Didn't we meet in the Bahamas? 581 00:23:56,402 --> 00:23:57,645 No. 582 00:23:57,669 --> 00:23:59,569 Sorry. 583 00:24:01,407 --> 00:24:04,642 I think it was Monte Carlo. 584 00:24:04,710 --> 00:24:05,887 See you back at the beach house. 585 00:24:05,911 --> 00:24:06,951 Ta-ta! 586 00:24:18,223 --> 00:24:21,183 Closed-Captioned by J.R. Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA 587 00:24:38,744 --> 00:24:42,345 Three's Company was videotaped in front of a studio audience. 37732

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