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♪ come and knock on our door ♪
2
00:00:13,614 --> 00:00:15,058
♪ come and knock on our door ♪
3
00:00:15,082 --> 00:00:16,593
♪ we've been waiting for you ♪
4
00:00:16,617 --> 00:00:18,061
♪ we've been waiting for you ♪
5
00:00:18,085 --> 00:00:21,064
♪ where the kisses are
Hers and hers and his ♪
6
00:00:21,088 --> 00:00:24,201
♪ three's company too ♪
7
00:00:24,225 --> 00:00:25,502
♪ come and dance on our floor ♪
8
00:00:25,526 --> 00:00:27,371
♪ come and dance on our floor ♪
9
00:00:27,395 --> 00:00:30,240
- ♪ take a step that is new ♪
- ♪ take a step that is new ♪
10
00:00:30,264 --> 00:00:33,343
♪ we've a lovable space
That needs your face ♪
11
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:35,700
♪ three's company too ♪
12
00:00:42,510 --> 00:00:45,588
- ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
- ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
13
00:00:45,612 --> 00:00:47,279
♪ three's company too ♪
14
00:00:54,855 --> 00:00:57,334
- ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
- ♪ down at our rendezvous ♪
15
00:00:57,358 --> 00:01:00,225
♪ three's company too. ♪
16
00:01:03,597 --> 00:01:07,377
Hi, janet. I jogged three miles,
Down to the pier and back.
17
00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:10,147
Isn't that great? Hey, chrissy.
18
00:01:10,171 --> 00:01:11,814
Uh, you look nice.
19
00:01:11,838 --> 00:01:14,117
Now don't you pick on me, jack.
20
00:01:14,141 --> 00:01:16,386
- huh?
- janet yelled
At me enough.
21
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,755
- because you look nice?
- no.
22
00:01:18,779 --> 00:01:21,024
- because you look nasty?
- no.
23
00:01:21,048 --> 00:01:23,393
- jack...
- chrissy, I wouldn't
Yell at you.
24
00:01:23,417 --> 00:01:25,295
I don't have a
Temper like janet.
25
00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:27,830
Jack, I feel so bad about it.
26
00:01:27,854 --> 00:01:30,167
Chrissy, take it easy.
27
00:01:30,191 --> 00:01:32,802
Nothing's worth
Getting so upset about.
28
00:01:32,826 --> 00:01:34,871
- no?
- no.
29
00:01:34,895 --> 00:01:37,006
You're right, it was
An honest mistake.
30
00:01:37,030 --> 00:01:39,543
Of course it was, little fishy.
31
00:01:39,567 --> 00:01:42,345
Now what went wrong, huh?
32
00:01:42,369 --> 00:01:45,115
Well, I threw away today's mail.
33
00:01:45,139 --> 00:01:47,150
- you what?!
- jack,
34
00:01:47,174 --> 00:01:49,919
I didn't mean it, I just went
Down to the trash pail
35
00:01:49,943 --> 00:01:51,721
And the trashman
Already emptied it.
36
00:01:51,745 --> 00:01:54,023
Christy, my g.I.-check
Must be in today's mail,
37
00:01:54,047 --> 00:01:55,925
It's already three days late.
38
00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:57,744
Jack, take it easy.
Remember, you said there
39
00:01:57,768 --> 00:01:59,463
Was nothing worth
Getting so upset about.
40
00:01:59,487 --> 00:02:02,132
Right, nothing is, but
This check is worth $300.00
41
00:02:02,156 --> 00:02:05,135
And I've been stalling the
School on my tuition for weeks.
42
00:02:05,159 --> 00:02:07,204
Today is the absolute deadline.
43
00:02:07,228 --> 00:02:08,505
What do you want
Me to do about it?
44
00:02:08,529 --> 00:02:11,763
Go down to the city dump
And dig up 10 blocks of trash?
45
00:02:14,701 --> 00:02:15,912
No, that would take too long.
46
00:02:15,936 --> 00:02:17,581
Thank you.
47
00:02:17,605 --> 00:02:20,383
Look, jack, couldn't the government
Just rush out a duplicate check?
48
00:02:20,407 --> 00:02:22,341
The government rush?
49
00:02:24,411 --> 00:02:26,856
I better rush. I'm
Gonna be late for work.
50
00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:28,492
Oh, me too.
51
00:02:28,516 --> 00:02:31,294
Look, jack, don't worry, we'll
Have to get out of this somehow.
52
00:02:31,318 --> 00:02:33,563
Yeah, I've already thought
Of one thing I could do.
53
00:02:33,587 --> 00:02:35,298
Really? What?
54
00:02:35,322 --> 00:02:37,434
Talk to someone at work
And see if they have an idea...
55
00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:39,035
- come.
- oh, fine.
56
00:02:39,059 --> 00:02:40,970
So you're just gonna
Leave me here alone.
57
00:02:40,994 --> 00:02:42,606
Well, thanks... Lana. Hi.
58
00:02:42,630 --> 00:02:44,941
I'm so glad I caught
You before you left.
59
00:02:44,965 --> 00:02:47,043
Lana, listen, I don't have
Any time to talk right now.
60
00:02:47,067 --> 00:02:50,514
I need $ 300.00 for my
School tuition today.
61
00:02:50,538 --> 00:02:54,717
Did you give furley the
Money for the rent yet?
62
00:02:54,741 --> 00:02:56,620
No, that's due tomorrow.
63
00:02:56,644 --> 00:02:58,355
Give that money to the school.
64
00:02:58,379 --> 00:03:01,691
I'll talk to ralph and buy
You some time on the rent.
65
00:03:01,715 --> 00:03:04,193
You know, he'll
Do anything for me.
66
00:03:04,217 --> 00:03:06,229
Could you, lana? That
Would be wonderful.
67
00:03:06,253 --> 00:03:09,131
It's no big deal, jack.
68
00:03:09,155 --> 00:03:12,935
He just insisted
That I go out with him.
69
00:03:12,959 --> 00:03:16,172
He'll take me to a dinner
At the monsterburger
70
00:03:16,196 --> 00:03:20,142
And order their
Two-for-one special.
71
00:03:20,166 --> 00:03:23,806
And he'll rush me to the
Movies before the prices change.
72
00:03:25,839 --> 00:03:29,786
And then he'll invite me to
His apartment for a nightcap.
73
00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:32,422
He'll be all over me.
74
00:03:32,446 --> 00:03:35,792
I have to kiss him before
I can get out of there.
75
00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:38,256
Lana, you'd go through
All of that for me?
76
00:03:41,388 --> 00:03:43,366
No.
77
00:03:43,390 --> 00:03:47,437
Even you aren't worth all that.
78
00:03:47,461 --> 00:03:49,105
Thanks anyway, lana.
79
00:03:49,129 --> 00:03:52,289
Hey, don't worry, I'll
Get the money somehow.
80
00:04:04,945 --> 00:04:07,123
Jack, hi. Any luck?
81
00:04:07,147 --> 00:04:09,626
No, and I tried everyplace.
82
00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:11,561
The only offer I got
Was from a guy who said
83
00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:13,730
He'd lend me some money
On my life insurance.
84
00:04:13,754 --> 00:04:16,788
- what's wrong with that?
- I have to die first.
85
00:04:18,525 --> 00:04:20,370
Jack, jack! I did it, I did it!
86
00:04:20,394 --> 00:04:21,771
What? What?
87
00:04:21,795 --> 00:04:23,729
Ta-dum!
88
00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:28,099
Ta-dum!
89
00:04:29,169 --> 00:04:31,681
Chrissy, what's this?
90
00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:35,552
You silly, it's money. It's $
300.00, I borrowed it for you.
91
00:04:35,576 --> 00:04:38,821
Chrissy, that's fantastic. How?
92
00:04:38,845 --> 00:04:42,292
Harry, our warehouseman at
Work, knew this man, mr. Bustamente.
93
00:04:42,316 --> 00:04:45,462
So I went down to his office and
He loaned me the money right away.
94
00:04:45,486 --> 00:04:47,464
$300.00, no strings.
95
00:04:47,488 --> 00:04:49,699
- no interest?
- oh, he was interested,
96
00:04:49,723 --> 00:04:52,736
That's why he
Loaned me the money.
97
00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:54,671
Harry called him a loan shark.
98
00:04:54,695 --> 00:04:56,795
But he seemed more
Like a guppy to me.
99
00:04:58,932 --> 00:05:00,777
- loan shark?
- loan shark.
100
00:05:00,801 --> 00:05:04,281
Chrissy, why don't you start
Over from the beginning?
101
00:05:04,305 --> 00:05:07,606
Okay. Ta-dum!
102
00:05:08,809 --> 00:05:10,987
Not that far back.
103
00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:12,756
Where are the loan papers?
104
00:05:12,780 --> 00:05:14,391
There aren't any.
He said all he wanted
105
00:05:14,415 --> 00:05:16,481
Was your name,
Address and next of kin.
106
00:05:19,453 --> 00:05:22,932
Chrissy, chrissy,
You've really done it.
107
00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:24,934
Thank you.
108
00:05:24,958 --> 00:05:27,659
But why... You're
Looking so unhappy.
109
00:05:28,729 --> 00:05:30,674
Chrissy, loan sharks are crooks.
110
00:05:30,698 --> 00:05:33,476
They loan money to people
At outrageous interest rates.
111
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:36,713
Janet, 25 is not that much.
112
00:05:36,737 --> 00:05:39,182
25 dollars?
113
00:05:39,206 --> 00:05:41,818
Even less than dollars, 25%.
114
00:05:41,842 --> 00:05:43,274
What?!
115
00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:50,259
25... 25% of $300.00 is $75.00.
116
00:05:50,283 --> 00:05:52,329
That can't be.
117
00:05:52,353 --> 00:05:56,533
Chrissy, those $ 75.00 is interest. That
Goes on top of the money you borrow.
118
00:05:56,557 --> 00:05:58,935
Chrissy, what's this
Bustamente's address?
119
00:05:58,959 --> 00:06:00,937
I got to get this money
Back to him right away.
120
00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:04,896
You don't have to worry. He said when
It was time he'd come looking for you.
121
00:06:07,234 --> 00:06:09,779
Where is the address?
122
00:06:09,803 --> 00:06:11,648
I wrote it on the
Back of an envelope.
123
00:06:11,672 --> 00:06:14,016
Gosh. Try to do somebody
A favor around here and...
124
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:15,719
Here it is, here it is.
125
00:06:15,743 --> 00:06:18,688
- 11 holland street.
- you don't want to go
Down there.
126
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:21,190
If I don't I'm gonna end up
At the bottom of the river.
127
00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:24,614
If you do, you'll end up at my auntie
Helen's house. That's her address.
128
00:06:27,488 --> 00:06:31,133
Here is the right one. I still
Don't see what all the fuss is about.
129
00:06:31,157 --> 00:06:33,169
Chrissy, I'll explain
It to you later.
130
00:06:33,193 --> 00:06:35,672
Jack... Good luck.
131
00:06:35,696 --> 00:06:39,342
Don't say it like that, janet.
I am coming back, you know.
132
00:06:39,366 --> 00:06:40,965
You'll be careful.
133
00:06:48,675 --> 00:06:51,755
That's beautiful.
134
00:06:51,779 --> 00:06:53,912
Come in.
135
00:06:57,317 --> 00:06:58,817
Mr. Bustamente?
136
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:03,399
- that's right.
- hi. I'm jack tripper.
137
00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:04,689
So?
138
00:07:05,859 --> 00:07:08,204
Do you remem... Do
You remember a...
139
00:07:08,228 --> 00:07:11,307
A girl named chrissy snow?
140
00:07:11,331 --> 00:07:13,851
She arranged a loan
For me this morning.
141
00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:16,779
- blonde girl?
- uhu.
142
00:07:16,803 --> 00:07:19,949
I remember. I still got a
Headache from the experience.
143
00:07:19,973 --> 00:07:22,384
- that's chrissy.
- oh, well.
144
00:07:22,408 --> 00:07:25,143
This is my executive
Secretary, floyd.
145
00:07:29,649 --> 00:07:32,150
Floyd... Hello, how do you do.
146
00:07:37,724 --> 00:07:39,884
I bet he's a strong typist.
147
00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:48,777
Mr. Bustamente, uh..
148
00:07:48,801 --> 00:07:51,113
I just came to return the money
149
00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:53,950
That chrissy got
For me this morning.
150
00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:56,841
Why? Is it the wrong size?
151
00:08:02,615 --> 00:08:04,927
No, it's... Uh...
152
00:08:04,951 --> 00:08:07,263
It's just that I
Don't need it really.
153
00:08:07,287 --> 00:08:10,333
It's all there, all 300,
Only used a few hours.
154
00:08:10,357 --> 00:08:12,668
Promptness don't count.
155
00:08:12,692 --> 00:08:16,339
You know, a minute or a
Week, the interest is still $75.00.
156
00:08:16,363 --> 00:08:18,674
Well, you see, the
Thing is, sir, I don't...
157
00:08:18,698 --> 00:08:22,000
I don't have $75.00.
158
00:08:23,370 --> 00:08:25,530
Excuse me, my fault, I'm sorry.
159
00:08:28,708 --> 00:08:31,020
I suggest you raise them.
160
00:08:31,044 --> 00:08:32,621
You see, I'm not... I'm not
Working at the moment,
161
00:08:32,645 --> 00:08:34,623
I'm going to cooking
School full time,
162
00:08:34,647 --> 00:08:36,158
But if you need some odd
Jobs done around here...
163
00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:39,661
Please, I've got enough
Deadbeats around here,
164
00:08:39,685 --> 00:08:44,200
I don't need... Did you
Say cooking school?
165
00:08:44,224 --> 00:08:46,424
Yes, sir, I'm studying
To be a chef.
166
00:08:47,994 --> 00:08:49,972
- you any good?
- well, I'm one of
167
00:08:49,996 --> 00:08:51,774
The top students in my class.
168
00:08:51,798 --> 00:08:52,863
Look.
169
00:08:57,337 --> 00:09:00,416
Now... My wife, she's
From the old country.
170
00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:02,551
Somehow or other she
Never learned how to cook,
171
00:09:02,575 --> 00:09:05,254
Can't even make a
Peanut butter sandwich.
172
00:09:05,278 --> 00:09:07,323
Without bragging,
Sir, I can put together...
173
00:09:07,347 --> 00:09:09,558
You show her how to
Make my favorite dish,
174
00:09:09,582 --> 00:09:12,561
Scampi a la calabrese,
175
00:09:12,585 --> 00:09:15,264
And I'll forgive your
Outstanding balance.
176
00:09:15,288 --> 00:09:18,067
- gee, mr. Bustamente...
- but, you know,
177
00:09:18,091 --> 00:09:21,904
My wife, she didn't take
Time to learn much english.
178
00:09:21,928 --> 00:09:23,839
I don't suppose
You speak italian.
179
00:09:23,863 --> 00:09:25,574
No, but my room mate does.
180
00:09:25,598 --> 00:09:27,876
Anyway, we'll be speaking
The language of food,
181
00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:30,612
Which is universal. You
Wife can start next week.
182
00:09:30,636 --> 00:09:32,748
- she can start in an hour.
- she can start in an hour.
183
00:09:32,772 --> 00:09:35,684
Why put things
Off. I'll be back.
184
00:09:35,708 --> 00:09:37,420
I hope so.
185
00:09:37,444 --> 00:09:39,621
Because I'll be there in two
Hours to check up on you.
186
00:09:39,645 --> 00:09:41,958
That doesn't give
Me much time, does it?
187
00:09:41,982 --> 00:09:43,725
I better get to
The market, uh...
188
00:09:43,749 --> 00:09:46,117
Okay, I'll see you later. Bye,
Nice... Will you excuse me?
189
00:09:47,753 --> 00:09:49,033
Don't get up.
190
00:09:53,626 --> 00:09:56,105
Okay, I've got the shrimps,
So I can get started
191
00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:58,307
As soon as she gets here.
Thank you for helping, girls.
192
00:09:58,331 --> 00:10:00,009
I hope my italian
Isn't too rusty.
193
00:10:00,033 --> 00:10:01,877
It has to be better than mine,
194
00:10:01,901 --> 00:10:03,534
All I know is merci beaukap.
195
00:10:05,505 --> 00:10:06,983
Look, look.
196
00:10:07,007 --> 00:10:11,353
Whatever the old girl's like,
No cracks, lots of respect.
197
00:10:11,377 --> 00:10:12,476
Okay, lots of respect.
198
00:10:14,580 --> 00:10:16,547
I'm lucia bustamente.
199
00:10:21,822 --> 00:10:23,599
- come in.
- gracias.
200
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:26,102
- oh sure.
- jack tripper?
201
00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:28,326
I'm jack tri... Tripper.
202
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:32,396
I'd like you to
Meet janet and...
203
00:10:33,599 --> 00:10:36,067
- chrissy.
- chrissy.
204
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,804
- bon giorno.
- merci beaukap.
205
00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:44,287
Jack.
206
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:52,962
Ahem... Welcome,
Mrs. Bustamente,
207
00:10:52,986 --> 00:10:56,699
And I hope you will enjoy your mini
Tour of the world of gourmet food.
208
00:11:05,932 --> 00:11:08,577
So if you're ready,
Why don't we go
209
00:11:08,601 --> 00:11:11,080
Into the kitchen and
Begin our lesson?
210
00:11:11,104 --> 00:11:12,181
Oh, jack.
211
00:11:26,052 --> 00:11:28,897
She's very
Enthusiastic, isn't she?
212
00:11:28,921 --> 00:11:31,800
Jack, look. You can't
Go through with this.
213
00:11:31,824 --> 00:11:34,736
Why not? She seems very anxious to
Get right to work and make something.
214
00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:37,239
I understood what mrs.
Bustamente was saying
215
00:11:37,263 --> 00:11:39,708
And the only thing that
She wants to make is you.
216
00:11:39,732 --> 00:11:41,999
Oh, come... What?
217
00:11:49,842 --> 00:11:52,154
But, janet, she's
A married woman
218
00:11:52,178 --> 00:11:53,755
And her husband's
A real tough cookie.
219
00:11:53,779 --> 00:11:55,925
Are you sure she was talking
About getting it on with me?
220
00:11:55,949 --> 00:11:58,160
Jack, you do not have
To understand italian
221
00:11:58,184 --> 00:12:00,129
To know what that
Lady was saying.
222
00:12:00,153 --> 00:12:02,798
I mean, she was shouting
It in body language.
223
00:12:02,822 --> 00:12:05,957
I thought she was getting a little
Worked up to be thinking about macaroni.
224
00:12:07,193 --> 00:12:09,772
Okay, you girls are
Gonna have to help me.
225
00:12:09,796 --> 00:12:13,242
If you hear anything that sounds
Like I'm in trouble in that kitchen,
226
00:12:13,266 --> 00:12:15,111
- you come in fast, okay.
- I can't.
227
00:12:15,135 --> 00:12:16,678
You know I have to get
Back to the flower shop.
228
00:12:16,702 --> 00:12:18,247
I know, but... Janet,
Please, I need you.
229
00:12:18,271 --> 00:12:20,682
I'm sorry, but that's my
Job we're talking about.
230
00:12:20,706 --> 00:12:22,351
- I'm already late.
- but, janet,
231
00:12:22,375 --> 00:12:24,876
- I need some help here.
- I'm sorry!
232
00:12:27,881 --> 00:12:32,161
Okay, chrissy. Will you help me
And not leave me alone with her?
233
00:12:32,185 --> 00:12:34,430
You want me to
Protect your honor?
234
00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:36,933
Chrissy... I'm serious.
235
00:12:36,957 --> 00:12:40,636
If her husband gets the idea that I'm
Messing around with her, it could be...
236
00:12:40,660 --> 00:12:43,039
- lucia:
Jack tripper!
- oh, jack tripper!
237
00:12:43,063 --> 00:12:44,063
Will you...
238
00:12:45,565 --> 00:12:48,925
If it sounds like I'm in trouble,
Get in there and fast, okay?
239
00:12:50,470 --> 00:12:53,549
Oh well, here we
Are. Mrs. Bustamente.
240
00:12:53,573 --> 00:12:56,152
Uh... Lesson number one
241
00:12:56,176 --> 00:12:58,254
In scampi a la calabrese.
242
00:12:58,278 --> 00:12:59,488
Here are the little shrimps...
243
00:13:05,651 --> 00:13:08,851
I knew I should have taken a
Language instead of woodshop.
244
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:12,701
Mrs. Bustamente, I think you
Can see better from up here.
245
00:13:12,725 --> 00:13:15,006
Whow! Now neither of us can see.
246
00:13:16,263 --> 00:13:18,007
Mrs. Bustamente,
247
00:13:18,031 --> 00:13:20,076
What about the cooking?
What about mr. Bustamente?
248
00:13:20,100 --> 00:13:22,433
Mr. Bustamente is
A big dumb turkey.
249
00:13:24,371 --> 00:13:28,006
Isn't that interesting how some
Italian words sound exactly like english?
250
00:13:29,242 --> 00:13:30,853
No, no, mrs.
Bustamente, seriously...
251
00:13:30,877 --> 00:13:33,155
- no hugging, no, no.
- please.
252
00:13:33,179 --> 00:13:35,491
Don't run the hair
Through your fingers.
253
00:13:35,515 --> 00:13:38,660
No, you don't want to kiss...
Mrs. Bustamente, she's...
254
00:13:38,684 --> 00:13:41,430
Hang on a second, will you?
255
00:13:41,454 --> 00:13:44,500
Chrissy, why aren't you
Coming in here to help me?
256
00:13:44,524 --> 00:13:48,059
You said to come in if you're in
Trouble. Sounded like you're having a ball.
257
00:13:49,629 --> 00:13:50,962
Get in here.
258
00:13:53,934 --> 00:13:56,345
Oh, chrissy, what a surprise.
259
00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:59,648
As long as you're here, why don't
You help look for my oregano?
260
00:13:59,672 --> 00:14:02,152
Take all day, if you have to.
261
00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:03,842
Okay.
262
00:14:08,748 --> 00:14:10,993
This your oregano? I'll
Be outside if you need me.
263
00:14:11,017 --> 00:14:14,319
Chrissy, chrissy...
264
00:14:15,888 --> 00:14:17,648
- we get cooking.
- yeah, uhm...
265
00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:20,469
Mrs. Bustamente, momento.
266
00:14:20,493 --> 00:14:23,461
Thank you, momentorrente,
Que sera, sera...
267
00:14:25,498 --> 00:14:27,609
Chrissy, I'm gonna have
To go down to furley's
268
00:14:27,633 --> 00:14:29,678
And cook this stuff there. You
Go entertain mrs. Bustamente.
269
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:31,680
But aren't you supposed
To teach her to cook?
270
00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:34,016
If this shrimp isn't cooked by
The time her husband gets here,
271
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:36,919
He's gonna cook my goose. Will you
Just open the door for me, please?
272
00:14:36,943 --> 00:14:38,142
Good god.
273
00:14:44,284 --> 00:14:45,364
Chrissy, you get...
274
00:14:48,488 --> 00:14:50,328
Chrissy, you're getting to me.
275
00:14:51,657 --> 00:14:54,103
Just entertain mrs.
Bustamente while I'm gone.
276
00:14:54,127 --> 00:14:55,537
But what am I supposed to say...
277
00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:58,796
Anything. Just talk to
Her, tell her a story.
278
00:15:03,803 --> 00:15:07,138
Hi, mrs. Bustamente. Why
Don't you have a seat?
279
00:15:08,641 --> 00:15:11,687
Did I ever tell you about the
Time when I was eight years old?
280
00:15:11,711 --> 00:15:16,158
My cousin and I had this frog,
His name was froggy, and...
281
00:15:19,485 --> 00:15:22,964
You don't like that
One? How about the time
282
00:15:22,988 --> 00:15:24,800
When they wouldn't let me on
My high school debating team?
283
00:15:24,824 --> 00:15:26,190
They said I argued too much.
284
00:15:28,328 --> 00:15:31,229
Lana, where are you? I've
Been waiting over an hour.
285
00:15:32,532 --> 00:15:34,443
Lana, I just think
It's really funny
286
00:15:34,467 --> 00:15:37,435
The way you keep pretending
That you don't wanna see me.
287
00:15:39,205 --> 00:15:42,784
Listen, when you get here I want you
To be all puckered up and ready to go,
288
00:15:42,808 --> 00:15:46,577
'cause I don't wanna waste time
Looking all over your face for lips.
289
00:16:02,995 --> 00:16:06,508
She must have run all the way.
290
00:16:06,532 --> 00:16:08,165
Lana, it's open.
291
00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:11,469
You're late, pookey pie.
292
00:16:15,441 --> 00:16:19,377
You're gonna learn soon that ralphie
Doesn't like his women to keep him waiting.
293
00:16:20,713 --> 00:16:23,714
Don't be nervous, come in
And get your giggle water.
294
00:16:29,088 --> 00:16:31,955
Uh... None for me, thanks.
295
00:16:33,726 --> 00:16:35,271
What are you doing here?
296
00:16:35,295 --> 00:16:37,606
I saw lana on her way
Out, she isn't coming.
297
00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:40,409
Oh, still playing
Hard to get, huh?
298
00:16:40,433 --> 00:16:43,279
Mr. Furley, there's a
Woman in my kitchen.
299
00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:45,847
I'm only responsible for
Mice and cockroaches.
300
00:16:45,871 --> 00:16:47,137
The woman is your problem.
301
00:16:48,741 --> 00:16:51,186
You don't understand. I
Was expecting an older lady
302
00:16:51,210 --> 00:16:54,590
To come over for a cooking lesson,
But instead she's young and beautiful.
303
00:16:54,614 --> 00:16:56,325
- beautiful?
- yeah.
304
00:16:56,349 --> 00:16:59,060
But she's italian, I can't understand
Her and she can't understand me.
305
00:16:59,084 --> 00:17:01,797
Every time I start to talk
Cooking, she's all over me.
306
00:17:01,821 --> 00:17:03,265
No kidding?
307
00:17:03,289 --> 00:17:05,334
No, I'm not kidding.
308
00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,469
I said scampi a la calabrese,
And she tried to kiss me.
309
00:17:07,493 --> 00:17:10,673
Of course, she's probably
Turned on by chefs.
310
00:17:10,697 --> 00:17:13,764
How could she know she
Was getting a chefette?
311
00:17:17,870 --> 00:17:21,205
Mr. Furley, would you mind if I
Used your kitchen for a while?
312
00:17:22,275 --> 00:17:23,707
No, be my guest.
313
00:17:26,579 --> 00:17:31,193
You say she really digs it when
You talk italian cooking to her, right?
314
00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:32,361
what? I can't hear you.
315
00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:34,385
Uh... Bake your
Little heart out.
316
00:17:39,725 --> 00:17:43,639
so then we decided to go down to
Where my kitty used to like to hide.
317
00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:46,374
That was the
Year after I was 12.
318
00:17:46,398 --> 00:17:48,209
When I was 13.
319
00:17:48,233 --> 00:17:51,447
Now, normally cats like
To hide under a porch.
320
00:17:51,471 --> 00:17:54,572
But not my kitty. We
Don't have a porch.
321
00:17:58,277 --> 00:18:00,956
I knew you'd like that one.
322
00:18:00,980 --> 00:18:03,525
Anyway, I wasn't gonna ask
My parents to buy a new house
323
00:18:03,549 --> 00:18:05,883
Just so fifi could
Have a place to hide.
324
00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:12,033
Anyway, me and my cousin went
Down there and guess what?
325
00:18:12,057 --> 00:18:14,157
The kitty wasn't there.
326
00:18:15,394 --> 00:18:17,573
I'd always figured
She was hiding.
327
00:18:17,597 --> 00:18:20,141
I'll be right back,
Just a minute.
328
00:18:20,165 --> 00:18:21,932
There's more. Al dente.
329
00:18:23,268 --> 00:18:25,335
Mama mia...
330
00:18:30,510 --> 00:18:32,220
Hi, mr. Furley.
331
00:18:32,244 --> 00:18:33,744
Bon journey.
332
00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:36,424
You feeling all right?
333
00:18:36,448 --> 00:18:38,827
Fit as a pizza.
334
00:18:38,851 --> 00:18:40,729
Listen, jack asked
Me to come up here
335
00:18:40,753 --> 00:18:43,064
And keep a young
Italian girl company.
336
00:18:43,088 --> 00:18:44,566
I understand she's
In the kitchen?
337
00:18:44,590 --> 00:18:48,036
But she doesn't speak much
English. Will you know what to say?
338
00:18:48,060 --> 00:18:50,461
Did romeo know what
To say to cleopatra?
339
00:18:52,164 --> 00:18:55,243
Arrivederci! Chef ralph.
340
00:18:58,638 --> 00:19:00,882
You're really a knockout.
341
00:19:00,906 --> 00:19:03,352
And how do I look to
You? Pretty good, eh?
342
00:19:11,784 --> 00:19:14,819
I knew it, and now a little cooking
Talk to really get us warmed up.
343
00:19:16,322 --> 00:19:20,257
I just finished preparing a
Fantastic linguini bambardo.
344
00:19:21,327 --> 00:19:23,205
Lombardi... Lombardo.
345
00:19:23,229 --> 00:19:25,596
Linguini. Oh.
346
00:19:29,502 --> 00:19:32,214
Uh, now I'm really getting
To you, aren't I? So...
347
00:19:35,975 --> 00:19:38,220
I was just gonna ask
You for a date tonight.
348
00:19:42,047 --> 00:19:44,360
I've heard about
You fiery italians.
349
00:19:44,384 --> 00:19:47,195
There is no-no on your
Lips, but si-si in your heart.
350
00:19:50,790 --> 00:19:52,950
If this is what turns
You on, the date is off.
351
00:19:53,793 --> 00:19:56,460
Hey, hold it, stop it.
352
00:20:01,901 --> 00:20:03,412
What's going on?
353
00:20:03,436 --> 00:20:06,636
Mr. Furley is keeping mrs.
Bustamente company in there.
354
00:20:07,973 --> 00:20:10,073
Hell, by destroying our kitchen?
355
00:20:11,377 --> 00:20:13,221
The scampi turned out
Fantastic. Take a bite.
356
00:20:13,245 --> 00:20:14,412
Jack, what...
357
00:20:15,748 --> 00:20:17,893
Mr. Furley, how could
That happen to you?
358
00:20:17,917 --> 00:20:20,696
She's not italian, she's crazy.
359
00:20:24,891 --> 00:20:27,324
Oh, jack.
360
00:20:30,496 --> 00:20:32,362
Uh, no, I made the scampi...
361
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:35,734
Ahem.
362
00:20:45,345 --> 00:20:47,047
We were just cooking
Together... We were
363
00:20:47,071 --> 00:20:49,012
Cooking together, we
Were just making some...
364
00:20:50,316 --> 00:20:53,217
Mr. Bustamente,
Would you... How... Eat.
365
00:21:06,833 --> 00:21:08,232
This is marvelous.
366
00:21:09,902 --> 00:21:11,079
- you two cooked this up?
- oh yeah.
367
00:21:11,103 --> 00:21:16,652
Well, you're a genius
Instructor, mr. Tripper.
368
00:21:16,676 --> 00:21:18,954
It's the best I ever tasted.
369
00:21:18,978 --> 00:21:21,058
Oh, well, thank you. You
Know, mrs. Bustamente
370
00:21:21,082 --> 00:21:22,958
Could be a fine cook
If she wanted to be.
371
00:21:22,982 --> 00:21:26,094
Now, why were
You kissing my wife.
372
00:21:26,118 --> 00:21:29,420
Kissing... Kissing...
373
00:21:41,233 --> 00:21:43,701
Mr. Tripper, come here.
374
00:21:50,343 --> 00:21:53,577
Janet, you can have my
Clock radio. Chrissy...
375
00:21:56,148 --> 00:21:58,427
My wife explained
What was going on here.
376
00:21:58,451 --> 00:22:00,161
Uhm?
377
00:22:00,185 --> 00:22:02,731
You're gonna learn that when a
Man fools around with a woman
378
00:22:02,755 --> 00:22:06,435
The way you have, he's
Gonna have to pay for it.
379
00:22:06,459 --> 00:22:08,069
Don't you think
I'm a little young?
380
00:22:08,093 --> 00:22:11,607
Of course not. You're just
The right age to start a family.
381
00:22:11,631 --> 00:22:15,110
- huh? I mean... Huh?
- forget the $75.00.
382
00:22:15,134 --> 00:22:18,502
And here is a little something
To help with the blessed event.
383
00:22:19,572 --> 00:22:22,017
And... Lucia...
384
00:22:22,041 --> 00:22:25,320
Come my dear, you could
Cook dinner for me tonight.
385
00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:26,444
Momento.
386
00:22:33,686 --> 00:22:35,664
Congratulatione.
387
00:22:35,688 --> 00:22:37,466
- ciao.
- ciao.
388
00:22:37,490 --> 00:22:39,657
Merci beaukap.
389
00:22:42,327 --> 00:22:44,840
I wonder what she said to
Get me off the hook like that?
390
00:22:44,864 --> 00:22:48,777
- she just stretched
The truth a little.
- how?
391
00:22:48,801 --> 00:22:51,146
Well, I didn't get all of it,
But it went something like...
392
00:22:51,170 --> 00:22:53,514
She was kissing you
Because she'd just found out
393
00:22:53,538 --> 00:22:56,406
That you and your wife chrissy
Were expecting a little tripper.
394
00:22:59,145 --> 00:23:01,422
- what?
- a little tripper.
395
00:23:01,446 --> 00:23:04,347
And chrissy needed the money
To pay for the baby doctor.
396
00:23:05,585 --> 00:23:07,195
And he believed that?
Well, he must have,
397
00:23:07,219 --> 00:23:09,500
I'm standing here without
Any extra holes in my head.
398
00:23:11,190 --> 00:23:14,350
I'm not mrs. Tripper. I'm
Gonna go straighten him out.
399
00:23:16,729 --> 00:23:18,295
Chrissy!
400
00:23:26,238 --> 00:23:28,038
- uh, yeah.
- why...
401
00:23:29,108 --> 00:23:30,652
Jack, I've got good news.
402
00:23:30,676 --> 00:23:33,588
The government sent a
Duplicate of your check that I lost.
403
00:23:33,612 --> 00:23:36,291
Great! Chrissy, where is it?
404
00:23:36,315 --> 00:23:39,227
I wanted to put it in a safe place,
So I thought of the clothes hamper.
405
00:23:39,251 --> 00:23:41,196
No, chrissy, not
The clothes hamper.
406
00:23:41,220 --> 00:23:43,531
I emptied that this morning, I
Put everything in the washer.
407
00:23:43,555 --> 00:23:44,666
Oh no.
408
00:23:44,690 --> 00:23:46,467
That's what I
Thought might happen,
409
00:23:46,491 --> 00:23:48,503
So I thought a better place
Would be under the kitchen sink.
410
00:23:48,527 --> 00:23:50,471
Chrissy, the sink
Has a leak in it.
411
00:23:50,495 --> 00:23:52,896
Yeah, I didn't like
The sink either.
412
00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:55,610
Chrissy, where is it?
413
00:23:55,634 --> 00:23:57,645
I put it in the
Safest place I know.
414
00:23:57,669 --> 00:23:58,836
In my shoe.
415
00:24:01,207 --> 00:24:04,252
Oh, no check. It is not
Here, oh no, I did it again.
416
00:24:04,276 --> 00:24:06,121
Chrissy, chrissy,
Take it easy, calm down.
417
00:24:06,145 --> 00:24:08,478
Calm down. Try the other shoe.
418
00:24:12,885 --> 00:24:14,930
I knew it.
419
00:24:14,954 --> 00:24:16,887
Well, I only missed by one.
420
00:24:46,852 --> 00:24:49,364
Ritter's voice: "Three's
Company" was videotaped
421
00:24:49,388 --> 00:24:51,268
in front of a studio audience.
32815
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