All language subtitles for The King of Queens - 06x07 - Secret Garden.DVDRip.English.C.edit.Addic7ed.com

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:35,333 --> 00:00:37,618 Hey, stud, we gettin' dinner anytime soon? 2 00:00:37,686 --> 00:00:38,619 Oh, yeah. Lookin' good. 3 00:00:38,687 --> 00:00:41,538 We got burger, burger, chicken... 4 00:00:41,606 --> 00:00:45,058 And their sickly cousin tofu dog. 5 00:00:45,126 --> 00:00:47,111 Look at this. 6 00:00:47,179 --> 00:00:48,846 You guys are back together. 7 00:00:48,914 --> 00:00:50,514 We're all back together again. 8 00:00:50,582 --> 00:00:52,283 How great is this? 9 00:00:52,351 --> 00:00:53,631 Yeah. Next time either one of you 10 00:00:53,656 --> 00:00:57,271 feels like your marriage is broken and empty, walk it off. 11 00:00:57,338 --> 00:00:58,839 Uh, grill went out again. 12 00:00:58,907 --> 00:01:01,308 Is it? That's it. Care, let's just get a new grill. 13 00:01:01,376 --> 00:01:02,476 We don't need a new grill. 14 00:01:02,544 --> 00:01:05,179 Just do that thing you do to start it up again. 15 00:01:05,246 --> 00:01:06,966 You mean crank up the gas, throw on a match, 16 00:01:06,991 --> 00:01:09,016 and dive behind the trash cans? 17 00:01:09,083 --> 00:01:10,250 Yeah, that. 18 00:01:10,318 --> 00:01:11,638 Come on, let's just get a new one. 19 00:01:11,663 --> 00:01:13,654 I just saw in a catalog for 500 bucks 20 00:01:13,722 --> 00:01:16,290 you can get ones with personalized grates, 21 00:01:16,358 --> 00:01:20,260 and you can burn your own logo into the meat. 22 00:01:20,329 --> 00:01:22,563 Knicks, Jets, Islanders. 23 00:01:22,631 --> 00:01:23,998 Stupidest thing I've ever heard. 24 00:01:24,065 --> 00:01:26,350 OK, tell me you wouldn't love the maybelline logo 25 00:01:26,418 --> 00:01:28,719 seared right into your pork chop. 26 00:01:28,787 --> 00:01:30,371 Just light it! 27 00:01:30,438 --> 00:01:31,972 Fine. Deac, help me out, would you? 28 00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:33,874 Yeah. 29 00:01:33,942 --> 00:01:37,478 Hey, guess who I have an appointment with tomorrow at 10:15? 30 00:01:37,545 --> 00:01:38,479 Who? 31 00:01:38,546 --> 00:01:40,681 Your fancy gynecologist. 32 00:01:40,748 --> 00:01:42,916 Dr. Crawford. You got in. 33 00:01:42,984 --> 00:01:46,470 Yup. Thanks to your referral and a year on the waiting list. 34 00:01:46,538 --> 00:01:48,072 So, I'm really gonna love him? 35 00:01:48,140 --> 00:01:49,289 Carrie, there are no words. 36 00:01:49,357 --> 00:01:51,397 I mean, it's like you're not even at an appointment. 37 00:01:51,422 --> 00:01:52,860 It's like you're having lunch. 38 00:01:52,928 --> 00:01:54,495 I can't wait. 39 00:01:54,562 --> 00:01:57,064 I can't tell you how many jerks I've been to. 40 00:02:00,602 --> 00:02:03,070 You know that one guy was actually on the phone, 41 00:02:03,138 --> 00:02:05,639 pricing jaguars while I was... 42 00:02:07,675 --> 00:02:09,944 OK, you ready? Here we go. All right. 43 00:02:10,012 --> 00:02:11,245 Get set. 44 00:02:18,486 --> 00:02:19,987 Did it light? 45 00:02:20,055 --> 00:02:22,557 I have no idea. 46 00:02:22,624 --> 00:02:24,491 I see a little, but I'm not sure if it's-- 47 00:02:29,197 --> 00:02:30,130 Aah! 48 00:02:30,198 --> 00:02:32,166 Oh, God! 49 00:02:32,234 --> 00:02:35,386 That's it! We're getting a new grill! 50 00:02:35,454 --> 00:02:37,538 We don't need a new grill. You just did it wrong. 51 00:02:37,606 --> 00:02:40,023 I don't have any eyebrows! 52 00:02:40,091 --> 00:02:43,628 All right. We'll get you a new grill, you whiner. 53 00:02:43,695 --> 00:02:44,996 And it's out again. 54 00:02:45,063 --> 00:02:46,983 Deac, just give me a hand. We'll nuke this stuff. 55 00:02:47,008 --> 00:02:47,598 All right. 56 00:02:47,666 --> 00:02:48,599 Thanks. 57 00:02:48,667 --> 00:02:49,600 Hey, Danny. 58 00:02:49,668 --> 00:02:50,601 Hi. 59 00:02:50,669 --> 00:02:51,602 Oh, hey. 60 00:02:51,620 --> 00:02:52,837 Hey. So, what's goin' on? 61 00:02:52,904 --> 00:02:56,473 You barbecuin'? Havin' a little party? 62 00:02:56,541 --> 00:03:00,144 No, it's just us and Deacon and Kelly. 63 00:03:00,212 --> 00:03:01,596 Oh, I get it. It's a couples thing. 64 00:03:01,663 --> 00:03:05,466 So if I was dating someone, I would've been invited. 65 00:03:05,533 --> 00:03:08,402 Uh... yeah. Sure. 66 00:03:08,470 --> 00:03:11,255 Cool. Another time, then. 67 00:03:11,323 --> 00:03:12,839 Anyway, I don't wanna hold you up. 68 00:03:12,907 --> 00:03:14,627 Just wanted you guys to be the first to know 69 00:03:14,652 --> 00:03:17,043 that I am jumping back into the small business world. 70 00:03:17,111 --> 00:03:20,330 Great. You got the bankruptcy paperwork already filled out or-- 71 00:03:20,398 --> 00:03:22,399 Would you stop it? What are you doing, hon? 72 00:03:22,467 --> 00:03:24,501 Gonna be doin' a little landscaping on the side, 73 00:03:24,569 --> 00:03:25,937 like I did in college. 74 00:03:26,004 --> 00:03:28,324 Just, uh, dropping off some fliers around the neighborhood. 75 00:03:28,391 --> 00:03:29,691 Thought maybe you guys would hand out a few to your friends. 76 00:03:29,759 --> 00:03:30,674 Oh. 77 00:03:30,742 --> 00:03:33,477 "The garden of weedin'." 78 00:03:39,351 --> 00:03:42,969 What does that mean? You put weeds into people's gardens? 79 00:03:43,037 --> 00:03:44,677 No, no. I take 'em out. It's a good thing. 80 00:03:44,722 --> 00:03:47,074 Why would you even wanna call attention to weeds? 81 00:03:47,142 --> 00:03:49,260 OK, you're overthinking it. It's catchy. 82 00:03:49,327 --> 00:03:50,647 It is. And you've seen his patio. 83 00:03:50,696 --> 00:03:51,662 It's gorgeous. 84 00:03:51,730 --> 00:03:53,331 I'd be happy to pass some of these out. 85 00:03:53,398 --> 00:03:54,465 Thank you. You're welcome. 86 00:03:54,533 --> 00:03:55,899 OK, we are good to go. 87 00:03:55,967 --> 00:03:57,401 Cool. Okay. Make some room. 88 00:03:57,469 --> 00:04:00,871 Whoa! Somethin' smelling good around here, huh? 89 00:04:00,939 --> 00:04:02,956 What've you got, there? Some burgers, some chicken? 90 00:04:05,611 --> 00:04:06,931 All right. I'll let you get to it. 91 00:04:06,999 --> 00:04:08,079 OK. Good to see you, Danny. 92 00:04:08,104 --> 00:04:09,099 Bye-bye. 93 00:04:10,866 --> 00:04:14,251 And that's it. We're done here. 94 00:04:14,319 --> 00:04:15,820 Shut up. 95 00:04:15,887 --> 00:04:17,521 It's over? 96 00:04:17,589 --> 00:04:18,706 Yes, ma'am. 97 00:04:18,773 --> 00:04:21,458 My God. The time just flew by. 98 00:04:21,526 --> 00:04:23,446 Well, I'm glad to hear it wasn't too bad for you. 99 00:04:23,494 --> 00:04:26,447 Are you kidding me? The classical music, 100 00:04:26,515 --> 00:04:30,384 the fur-lined stirrups, and this... 101 00:04:30,452 --> 00:04:32,603 This gown! What is this, Egyptian cotton? 102 00:04:32,671 --> 00:04:35,389 300-thread count. 103 00:04:35,456 --> 00:04:36,640 Well, can I, like, buy one? 104 00:04:36,708 --> 00:04:38,675 Do you have a gift shop here or something? 105 00:04:40,061 --> 00:04:41,462 Hey, you're funny. 106 00:04:41,530 --> 00:04:46,199 And, if I might add, you have a fabulous uterus to boot. 107 00:04:48,069 --> 00:04:49,903 Thank you. 108 00:04:49,971 --> 00:04:51,505 Dr. Crawford. 109 00:04:51,573 --> 00:04:53,139 Uh, yes, Marilyn? 110 00:04:53,207 --> 00:04:55,909 Your 11:00 just called. She's gonna be late. 111 00:04:55,977 --> 00:04:57,444 Sheila Carrasco again? 112 00:04:57,512 --> 00:04:58,712 Yeah. 113 00:04:58,780 --> 00:05:01,248 Tell her she doesn't need to bother coming in today, 114 00:05:01,315 --> 00:05:04,668 and she can use the time to find another gynecologist. 115 00:05:04,736 --> 00:05:06,854 So, Carrie, 116 00:05:06,922 --> 00:05:08,940 do you have any other questions for me, 117 00:05:09,007 --> 00:05:11,208 or anything else you'd like to discuss? 118 00:05:11,276 --> 00:05:15,079 Well, I'm guessing I shouldn't be late for my next appointment. 119 00:05:15,146 --> 00:05:16,897 It's not ideal. 120 00:05:16,965 --> 00:05:20,734 OK. Let me just make a few notes in your chart here. 121 00:05:20,801 --> 00:05:21,752 All right. 122 00:05:21,903 --> 00:05:23,103 You mind if I move your purse? 123 00:05:23,170 --> 00:05:24,271 Oh, yeah. Sorry. 124 00:05:24,338 --> 00:05:27,374 "The garden of weedin'." 125 00:05:27,442 --> 00:05:30,076 What is this, a landscaper? 126 00:05:30,144 --> 00:05:31,712 Yeah, it's my husband's cousin. 127 00:05:31,780 --> 00:05:32,763 Oh. Is he good? 128 00:05:32,830 --> 00:05:33,630 Well, he's just, uh, 129 00:05:33,697 --> 00:05:34,897 getting back into the business, 130 00:05:34,922 --> 00:05:36,383 but he has a real knack for it. 131 00:05:36,451 --> 00:05:38,652 Huh. That could really work out well for me. 132 00:05:38,720 --> 00:05:40,688 We need a little work done on our front yard. 133 00:05:40,756 --> 00:05:44,124 But I only wanna spend $500. 134 00:05:44,192 --> 00:05:45,926 Give him a call. Take a flier. 135 00:05:45,993 --> 00:05:48,194 Great. Thanks. 136 00:05:48,262 --> 00:05:49,613 Feel free to help yourself 137 00:05:49,681 --> 00:05:52,049 to an ice-blended coffee on your way out. 138 00:06:06,547 --> 00:06:09,199 You know that's not a TV you're watching, right? 139 00:06:09,267 --> 00:06:11,434 Ha ha ha! Good one. 140 00:06:12,436 --> 00:06:13,904 Actually, for your information, 141 00:06:13,972 --> 00:06:16,040 I'm on-line doing a little research. 142 00:06:16,107 --> 00:06:19,943 "Adventures in meat.com." 143 00:06:20,011 --> 00:06:21,411 It's the charmaster web site. 144 00:06:21,479 --> 00:06:24,614 I'm taking a virtual tour of the 6-burner platinum edition. 145 00:06:24,683 --> 00:06:26,316 Where's the grill? 146 00:06:26,384 --> 00:06:29,036 We're in it. It's a steak-eye view. 147 00:06:30,638 --> 00:06:33,073 Look at this. We're zooming into the drip tray 148 00:06:33,141 --> 00:06:35,208 and back up to the lava rocks. 149 00:06:35,276 --> 00:06:38,145 Drip tray, lava rocks. 150 00:06:38,212 --> 00:06:40,347 Feels sexy, don't it? 151 00:06:40,414 --> 00:06:44,184 Would you just pick one of these freaking things and just buy it? 152 00:06:45,520 --> 00:06:47,955 Hello? 153 00:06:48,023 --> 00:06:49,773 Oh, hi, Dr. Crawford. 154 00:06:49,841 --> 00:06:51,525 Look. Look. Look. Sauce warmer. 155 00:06:51,593 --> 00:06:52,842 Corn-cob caddy. 156 00:06:52,910 --> 00:06:56,163 Shh! It's my new gynecologist. 157 00:06:57,415 --> 00:06:58,582 Hey, Doug. Is Arthur home? 158 00:06:58,649 --> 00:07:00,117 No, he's out now. 159 00:07:00,184 --> 00:07:02,319 Oh, OK. Can you see that he gets this? 160 00:07:02,386 --> 00:07:03,787 A slim-Jim? 161 00:07:03,855 --> 00:07:06,123 Yeah. Yeah, he brought one on our walk today, 162 00:07:06,191 --> 00:07:07,791 and a couple of the dogs tag-teamed him 163 00:07:07,859 --> 00:07:09,526 and took it away. 164 00:07:10,562 --> 00:07:12,729 You made a special trip for this? 165 00:07:12,797 --> 00:07:15,015 He was pretty insistent. 166 00:07:15,082 --> 00:07:16,916 OK, I'll pass it on. 167 00:07:16,984 --> 00:07:18,252 Great, thanks. 168 00:07:18,319 --> 00:07:19,720 - Oh, hey, Hol. - Hey. 169 00:07:19,788 --> 00:07:22,690 That was Dr. Crawford calling to tell me 170 00:07:22,757 --> 00:07:25,258 what a great job Danny did on his front yard. 171 00:07:25,326 --> 00:07:27,528 I guess somebody was wrong about him. 172 00:07:27,595 --> 00:07:29,763 OK, my idiot cousin can dig a ditch. 173 00:07:29,830 --> 00:07:32,432 Oh, how I've misjudged him. 174 00:07:33,401 --> 00:07:35,286 Did you just say Dr. Crawford, 175 00:07:35,353 --> 00:07:37,354 as in Dr. Roy Crawford? 176 00:07:37,422 --> 00:07:39,056 Is he your gynecologist? 177 00:07:39,124 --> 00:07:40,624 Yeah. 178 00:07:40,692 --> 00:07:42,593 Gosh, I hear he's the best. 179 00:07:42,660 --> 00:07:44,428 I mean, is there any way you could get me in? 180 00:07:44,496 --> 00:07:47,431 Why? What's wrong with your guy? 181 00:07:47,499 --> 00:07:50,033 Dr. Ambrose? Well, I saw him a couple of times, 182 00:07:50,102 --> 00:07:53,737 and then he kept calling me late at night. 183 00:07:54,872 --> 00:07:56,192 I mean, is there any way you could 184 00:07:56,217 --> 00:07:57,941 put in a good word for me with Crawford? 185 00:07:58,009 --> 00:07:59,843 Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Um. 186 00:07:59,911 --> 00:08:01,412 No. No. 187 00:08:01,479 --> 00:08:02,563 Well- I can't. 188 00:08:02,631 --> 00:08:03,751 If you just- I don't want to. 189 00:08:03,776 --> 00:08:04,815 It won't take 2 seconds. 190 00:08:04,882 --> 00:08:05,816 I just don't want to. 191 00:08:05,883 --> 00:08:07,003 OK, thank you. OK. All right. 192 00:08:07,028 --> 00:08:08,295 Thanks very much. Thanks. 193 00:08:12,140 --> 00:08:13,390 Your boyfriend's here. 194 00:08:17,829 --> 00:08:19,163 Hey, what's up? 195 00:08:19,230 --> 00:08:20,230 Just came by to thank you 196 00:08:20,298 --> 00:08:21,398 for hooking me up with the good doctor. 197 00:08:21,465 --> 00:08:22,399 Oh, yeah! I just got off the phone with him. 198 00:08:22,466 --> 00:08:23,400 He's thrilled. 199 00:08:23,467 --> 00:08:24,401 I know. 200 00:08:24,468 --> 00:08:25,788 And as a token of my appreciation, 201 00:08:25,813 --> 00:08:28,172 I bought you a prunus persica. 202 00:08:28,239 --> 00:08:31,608 Or, as you kids call it, an apple tree. 203 00:08:31,676 --> 00:08:33,444 Sweet. You can never have too many apples. 204 00:08:33,512 --> 00:08:36,947 And you're gonna be buried in them in about 18 years. 205 00:08:37,015 --> 00:08:38,715 Well, I'm glad this worked out. 206 00:08:38,783 --> 00:08:40,783 Yeah. Thanks to you, I'm really getting legit here. 207 00:08:40,808 --> 00:08:42,235 Like an actual business! 208 00:08:42,303 --> 00:08:44,805 Dr. Crawford will receive his bill 209 00:08:44,872 --> 00:08:48,108 on official garden of weedin' stationery. 210 00:08:48,175 --> 00:08:50,043 Look, I even got my own logo. 211 00:08:51,312 --> 00:08:53,012 Is that a drawing of you naked? 212 00:08:54,449 --> 00:08:56,650 No, that's me with a really big green thumb. 213 00:09:01,856 --> 00:09:04,958 Wait a minute. This bill is for $958. 214 00:09:05,026 --> 00:09:06,326 Yeah? So? So? 215 00:09:06,394 --> 00:09:08,445 He only wanted to spend $500. 216 00:09:08,513 --> 00:09:10,497 The job ran over. It happens. 217 00:09:10,565 --> 00:09:12,799 OK. He's gonna freak out when he sees this. 218 00:09:12,867 --> 00:09:14,517 He can freak out all he wants. 219 00:09:14,585 --> 00:09:18,822 He got his hedges. Now I gets my cabbage. 220 00:09:18,889 --> 00:09:21,124 Yeah, and he drops me as a patient 221 00:09:21,192 --> 00:09:22,592 'cause he's gonna blame me for this. 222 00:09:22,617 --> 00:09:24,394 Oh, come on. No, I'm serious. 223 00:09:24,462 --> 00:09:26,313 You don't cross this guy, OK? 224 00:09:26,380 --> 00:09:28,115 Sorry, pal. You're only charging him $500. 225 00:09:28,183 --> 00:09:29,149 I can't do that. 226 00:09:29,217 --> 00:09:30,017 You're doing it. 227 00:09:30,084 --> 00:09:31,602 I can't! I already owe it all! 228 00:09:31,669 --> 00:09:34,004 I got all these plants on credit from the nursery. 229 00:09:34,072 --> 00:09:34,992 I gotta pay my workers. 230 00:09:35,017 --> 00:09:36,774 This thing alone was $63. 231 00:09:36,841 --> 00:09:38,576 You charged him for my apple tree?! 232 00:09:38,643 --> 00:09:41,862 It's how the business works! 233 00:09:41,930 --> 00:09:43,563 You're a moron! 234 00:09:43,631 --> 00:09:45,299 Don't let me bother you, kids. 235 00:09:45,367 --> 00:09:47,401 Just measuring out a new spot for my grill. 236 00:09:47,469 --> 00:09:49,453 Sorry, Carrie. The bill is what it is, all right? 237 00:09:49,521 --> 00:09:51,538 I'm not doing this for charity. I'm a businessman. 238 00:09:51,606 --> 00:09:53,373 Well, fine. I'm just gonna call him and tell him not to pay you. 239 00:09:53,441 --> 00:09:54,708 Well, then, I'll sue him. 240 00:09:54,776 --> 00:09:56,176 Or, better yet, I'll go to his house 241 00:09:56,201 --> 00:09:57,277 and rip out all my plants. 242 00:09:57,345 --> 00:09:58,278 Pardon me. 243 00:09:58,346 --> 00:09:59,613 I can't believe you! 244 00:09:59,681 --> 00:10:00,881 Yeah, well, believe it, baby. 245 00:10:02,450 --> 00:10:05,636 I'm gonna lose my gynecologist. 246 00:10:05,703 --> 00:10:07,938 Holly's guy sounded pretty good. 247 00:10:17,716 --> 00:10:19,316 Hey, hon. 248 00:10:19,383 --> 00:10:20,951 Watching a western? 249 00:10:21,019 --> 00:10:22,786 Yeah. 250 00:10:22,854 --> 00:10:24,938 Who made saloon furniture? 251 00:10:25,006 --> 00:10:28,775 Never really held up during a fight. 252 00:10:28,843 --> 00:10:30,043 And those banisters, 253 00:10:30,111 --> 00:10:31,945 what's the point of even having one? 254 00:10:33,398 --> 00:10:35,799 Ha ha! 255 00:10:35,866 --> 00:10:38,735 That's why I love you. I never know what you're gonna say. 256 00:10:42,006 --> 00:10:44,441 Okay, what do you want? 257 00:10:47,178 --> 00:10:47,878 Here's the thing. 258 00:10:47,946 --> 00:10:49,896 I don't know if you heard 259 00:10:49,964 --> 00:10:51,432 what went down with Danny and I, 260 00:10:51,499 --> 00:10:54,168 but it turns out he's gonna overcharge my gynecologist 261 00:10:54,235 --> 00:10:55,869 by, like, $400. 262 00:10:55,937 --> 00:10:57,237 Yeah? 263 00:10:57,304 --> 00:10:59,104 OK, now, I'm just throwing this out there, OK? 264 00:10:59,123 --> 00:11:03,093 I'm just spitballing. I want you to keep an open mind, all right? 265 00:11:03,161 --> 00:11:05,713 I want us to pay the extra $400. 266 00:11:11,503 --> 00:11:13,086 OK, cool. All right. 267 00:11:13,153 --> 00:11:14,473 So I'm just gonna go scoot on down 268 00:11:14,498 --> 00:11:15,605 to the ATM, all right? 269 00:11:15,673 --> 00:11:17,491 And I'll see you in a minute. 270 00:11:17,558 --> 00:11:20,594 Saloon furniture. You're crazy, man! 271 00:11:20,661 --> 00:11:21,361 Hey! Hey! 272 00:11:21,429 --> 00:11:22,629 You don't gotta go to the ATM, 273 00:11:22,680 --> 00:11:24,280 I got it right here. I got it right here. 274 00:11:24,305 --> 00:11:25,382 Not a problem. 275 00:11:25,450 --> 00:11:28,786 Here it is, 100, 200, 300, 276 00:11:28,853 --> 00:11:30,788 no hundred ever. 277 00:11:31,973 --> 00:11:34,291 Come on, Doug! 278 00:11:34,359 --> 00:11:35,892 No, it's insane. I'm not paying for Danny's screwup. 279 00:11:35,960 --> 00:11:37,177 Let Danny pay for it. 280 00:11:37,245 --> 00:11:38,578 He can't pay for it. He doesn't have the money. 281 00:11:38,646 --> 00:11:39,980 Besides, he's a loose Cannon. 282 00:11:40,047 --> 00:11:42,916 He could freak out and leave a dead shrub in the guy's bed. 283 00:11:42,984 --> 00:11:45,435 Let me just get the 500 from Crawford, 284 00:11:45,503 --> 00:11:47,003 put it in with our money, 285 00:11:47,071 --> 00:11:48,472 and I'll give it all to Danny. 286 00:11:48,539 --> 00:11:51,174 Nobody has to know anything, and everybody's happy. 287 00:11:51,242 --> 00:11:53,343 Except for chubby. 288 00:11:54,529 --> 00:11:57,480 Doug... please. 289 00:11:57,549 --> 00:12:01,251 I cannot lose this gynecologist. 290 00:12:01,318 --> 00:12:02,903 What is it about this guy? 291 00:12:02,971 --> 00:12:06,339 What-what goes on in that room? 292 00:12:07,208 --> 00:12:09,493 I don't know. It's everything. 293 00:12:09,561 --> 00:12:12,229 I mean, even the lighting in there, Doug. 294 00:12:12,296 --> 00:12:14,598 I stayed after to redo my makeup, 295 00:12:14,666 --> 00:12:18,235 and it came out perfect. 296 00:12:18,302 --> 00:12:22,473 Well, maybe losing your gynecologist is a good lesson for you. 297 00:12:22,540 --> 00:12:25,376 Maybe next time you wanna do something nice for Danny, 298 00:12:25,443 --> 00:12:28,612 you'll think to yourself, "ooh. Last time I did this, 299 00:12:28,680 --> 00:12:32,082 I lost my gynecologist." 300 00:12:32,149 --> 00:12:35,052 Look, I know in a logical world, it makes no sense, 301 00:12:35,119 --> 00:12:37,387 but I think if you were a woman, you would understand. 302 00:12:37,455 --> 00:12:39,122 Even if we do pay the 400 bucks, 303 00:12:39,189 --> 00:12:41,429 that's all the extra money we got lying around, you know? 304 00:12:41,492 --> 00:12:43,192 How am I gonna pay for my grill? 305 00:12:43,260 --> 00:12:44,595 Yeah. 306 00:12:44,662 --> 00:12:47,030 Oh... my God. 307 00:12:47,098 --> 00:12:49,332 Come on. We'll just cancel the new one, 308 00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:50,667 and I'll light the old one. 309 00:12:50,735 --> 00:12:52,702 You never have to touch it. 310 00:12:52,770 --> 00:12:54,530 Great, so I'll still have my crappy old grill 311 00:12:54,555 --> 00:12:58,309 and a wife with a smoking head. 312 00:12:59,277 --> 00:13:01,178 Sorry, toots. Ain't gonna happen. 313 00:13:04,565 --> 00:13:08,968 Hey. Uh, I gotta talk to you about this danny/ gynecologist thing. 314 00:13:09,036 --> 00:13:10,796 Hey, did you hear about that? Carrie wants us 315 00:13:10,821 --> 00:13:13,173 to pay $400 to Danny, man. Freakin' crazy. 316 00:13:13,241 --> 00:13:14,607 Yeah, crazy. 317 00:13:14,675 --> 00:13:16,926 I'm gonna need you to pay that. 318 00:13:16,994 --> 00:13:19,362 What? Why should I pay it? 319 00:13:19,430 --> 00:13:20,180 Because your cousin was referred 320 00:13:20,248 --> 00:13:21,665 to Dr. Crawford by your wife, 321 00:13:21,733 --> 00:13:23,099 who was referred by my wife, 322 00:13:23,167 --> 00:13:24,401 and now my wife's hysterical 323 00:13:24,469 --> 00:13:25,589 that if this thing blows up, 324 00:13:25,637 --> 00:13:27,103 she's going down with Carrie. 325 00:13:27,171 --> 00:13:30,307 What is wrong with you people? 326 00:13:30,374 --> 00:13:32,574 Look, all I know is I just got back together with Kelly. 327 00:13:32,642 --> 00:13:33,842 I don't need her running around 328 00:13:33,867 --> 00:13:35,562 crying about losing her gynecologist. 329 00:13:35,630 --> 00:13:37,030 Sorry, dude, I can't do it. 330 00:13:37,098 --> 00:13:39,433 Oh, you're doing it. 331 00:13:39,500 --> 00:13:40,784 Oh, really? You're gonna make me? 332 00:13:40,852 --> 00:13:42,719 Maybe I will. 333 00:13:42,787 --> 00:13:44,921 All right, then let's go. 334 00:13:44,989 --> 00:13:46,072 Ow! 335 00:13:47,959 --> 00:13:49,542 You said let's go! 336 00:13:49,610 --> 00:13:51,795 Did not expect that! 337 00:13:51,863 --> 00:13:53,479 I'm sorry, man. 338 00:13:53,547 --> 00:13:56,283 Look, I'm just trying to put my marriage back together here. 339 00:13:56,350 --> 00:13:57,483 Fine! I'll do it. 340 00:13:57,551 --> 00:13:59,152 Thank you. 341 00:13:59,220 --> 00:14:00,820 What is it with this doctor? 342 00:14:00,888 --> 00:14:02,488 What do they love so much about him? 343 00:14:02,556 --> 00:14:04,624 I don't know. He-he's soothing. 344 00:14:04,691 --> 00:14:06,759 He puts them at ease. 345 00:14:08,762 --> 00:14:11,031 He's like the vagina whisperer. 346 00:14:24,328 --> 00:14:26,062 Hey. 347 00:14:27,665 --> 00:14:29,599 How's it going? 348 00:14:31,669 --> 00:14:35,004 Don't worry. Nobody's trying to light you. 349 00:14:36,274 --> 00:14:38,542 Just gonna check out your gas flow. 350 00:14:41,279 --> 00:14:44,414 So... how about them Knicks, huh? 351 00:14:46,551 --> 00:14:47,751 I tell you, I think this year 352 00:14:47,819 --> 00:14:49,820 they're looking pretty good if they-- 353 00:14:54,859 --> 00:14:56,793 I will see you in hell. 354 00:14:58,763 --> 00:15:01,164 Hi, honey. What are you doing? 355 00:15:01,232 --> 00:15:03,433 Oh, just trying to cook dinner and not die. 356 00:15:03,501 --> 00:15:05,435 Look, I know you hate this grill, 357 00:15:05,503 --> 00:15:07,671 but everything worked out great. 358 00:15:07,739 --> 00:15:09,739 Danny thinks Dr. Crawford paid for the whole thing. 359 00:15:09,774 --> 00:15:11,842 Dr. Crawford thinks he only paid $500. 360 00:15:11,909 --> 00:15:14,511 It's over. And I promise you next year, 361 00:15:14,579 --> 00:15:16,580 I will buy you an even better grill. 362 00:15:16,647 --> 00:15:17,864 Stop saying grill. 363 00:15:17,932 --> 00:15:20,800 All right, I'm gonna go cook this meat inside, OK? 364 00:15:22,837 --> 00:15:24,972 Aah! 365 00:15:29,944 --> 00:15:31,744 Honey, there's a message on the machine. 366 00:15:31,812 --> 00:15:33,213 Did you check it? No! 367 00:15:35,349 --> 00:15:36,549 Greetings, Americans, 368 00:15:36,617 --> 00:15:39,352 and welcome to today's moron report. 369 00:15:39,420 --> 00:15:41,721 Seems Dr. Crawford was so happy with the job 370 00:15:41,789 --> 00:15:44,224 this moron did in his front yard 371 00:15:44,292 --> 00:15:47,694 that he just hired him to do his whole backyard. 372 00:15:48,863 --> 00:15:50,697 Huh! Guess he didn't have any problem 373 00:15:50,764 --> 00:15:52,565 with the $900 after all. 374 00:15:52,633 --> 00:15:55,568 Ooh! File this under "burned." 375 00:15:57,538 --> 00:16:00,057 Ow! What was that for? 376 00:16:00,124 --> 00:16:01,491 You're gonna call Dr. Crawford. 377 00:16:01,559 --> 00:16:03,894 You're gonna tell him you're sick, tell him you died, 378 00:16:03,962 --> 00:16:06,663 tell him you sliced off your foot with a garden weasel. 379 00:16:06,731 --> 00:16:08,231 Just get out of it. 380 00:16:08,299 --> 00:16:10,150 Why should I get out of it? The guy loves me. 381 00:16:10,217 --> 00:16:12,385 He couldn't have been happier with the job I did. 382 00:16:12,452 --> 00:16:15,688 Because he thought it cost $500. 383 00:16:15,756 --> 00:16:18,007 What are you talking about? He paid me 900. 384 00:16:18,075 --> 00:16:19,259 No, he paid you 500, 385 00:16:19,327 --> 00:16:21,761 and Doug and I paid the rest out of our pockets. 386 00:16:21,829 --> 00:16:23,546 You did? Yeah. 387 00:16:23,614 --> 00:16:26,849 So Crawford thought I did all that work for just 500? 388 00:16:26,917 --> 00:16:29,185 Again, yeah. 389 00:16:29,253 --> 00:16:30,987 Uh-oh. 390 00:16:31,055 --> 00:16:33,723 Uh-oh? Uh-oh what? 391 00:16:33,791 --> 00:16:37,193 W - well, I thought he was fine paying double the estimate, 392 00:16:37,261 --> 00:16:39,529 so I thought I'd give triple a shot. 393 00:16:39,597 --> 00:16:43,199 Oh, my God! You are the stupidest person alive! 394 00:16:43,267 --> 00:16:44,867 I don't suppose you guys would be willing 395 00:16:44,902 --> 00:16:46,742 to pay the difference one more time, would you? 396 00:16:46,767 --> 00:16:49,105 Ow! Same one! 397 00:16:49,173 --> 00:16:52,208 Would you please get your goldfish out of my bathtub? 398 00:16:52,276 --> 00:16:53,677 All right, they're not goldfish, OK? 399 00:16:53,744 --> 00:16:54,977 They're Japanese kol, 400 00:16:55,045 --> 00:16:57,046 and they're really expensive, so hands off. 401 00:16:57,114 --> 00:16:59,882 Whoa, whoa. Are those kol for Dr. Crawford? 402 00:16:59,950 --> 00:17:02,018 Yeah. Did he ask for kol? 403 00:17:02,085 --> 00:17:04,053 Not in so many words. 404 00:17:04,121 --> 00:17:05,856 It's one word! 405 00:17:05,923 --> 00:17:07,323 About my bath? 406 00:17:07,391 --> 00:17:09,192 Is this the way you take a bath? 407 00:17:09,259 --> 00:17:10,393 Yeah. 408 00:17:10,461 --> 00:17:13,229 You look like Ernie from Sesame Street. 409 00:17:13,297 --> 00:17:14,464 What did I do to you? 410 00:17:14,532 --> 00:17:16,265 I don't-- Nothing. I'm sorry. 411 00:17:16,333 --> 00:17:18,101 What was I thinking? 412 00:17:18,168 --> 00:17:19,903 I- I can't run a business. 413 00:17:19,971 --> 00:17:23,272 Oh, man! Why did I listen to that fortune cookie?! 414 00:17:23,340 --> 00:17:24,540 I hate me! 415 00:17:24,608 --> 00:17:26,568 All right, all right! Pull yourself together here. 416 00:17:26,593 --> 00:17:28,344 Call Dr. Crawford. I will dial. 417 00:17:28,412 --> 00:17:29,379 All right, but I'll tell you right now. 418 00:17:29,446 --> 00:17:30,914 He's gonna be pretty pissed. 419 00:17:30,982 --> 00:17:34,050 I already dug up his yard and I may have cut his phone line. 420 00:17:35,452 --> 00:17:38,722 OK, Danny. I guess you have to go through with this. 421 00:17:38,789 --> 00:17:41,424 But here's how it's gonna go down. 422 00:17:41,492 --> 00:17:43,059 Look at me. I can't. 423 00:17:43,127 --> 00:17:45,562 Look at me! 424 00:17:45,630 --> 00:17:49,032 You're gonna give him exactly what he asked for 425 00:17:49,099 --> 00:17:52,502 for exactly the amount you told him it was gonna cost, 426 00:17:52,570 --> 00:17:55,639 and it's gonna be friggin' gorgeous, 427 00:17:55,706 --> 00:17:59,075 or I'm gonna give you a gynecological exam. 428 00:18:07,518 --> 00:18:08,418 Yeah. 429 00:18:08,486 --> 00:18:09,986 It was funny. 430 00:18:10,054 --> 00:18:12,656 Hey, nice job up there with the karaoke, my friend. 431 00:18:12,723 --> 00:18:15,659 Oh, thanks, man. And I wasn't just talking smack. 432 00:18:15,726 --> 00:18:17,661 You do have Bette Davis eyes. 433 00:18:21,899 --> 00:18:24,400 Carrie, this is Dr. Crawford. 434 00:18:24,468 --> 00:18:27,437 Sorry about the connection. I'm on my cell. 435 00:18:27,504 --> 00:18:30,073 Something's wrong with my home phone. 436 00:18:30,140 --> 00:18:33,309 Anyway, I'm just calling because Danny dug up my yard, 437 00:18:33,377 --> 00:18:35,745 but I haven't been able to get a hold of him since. 438 00:18:35,813 --> 00:18:38,147 I'm going out of town tonight until Monday, 439 00:18:38,215 --> 00:18:41,818 but if you speak to him, please leave me a message. 440 00:18:41,886 --> 00:18:45,455 Thanks. Bye! 441 00:18:45,522 --> 00:18:47,757 You let your cousin do another job for him? 442 00:18:47,825 --> 00:18:49,775 I didn't know until after he started it. 443 00:18:49,843 --> 00:18:50,860 Well, where is he? 444 00:19:06,026 --> 00:19:09,862 OK. It's 1 A.M. I'm standing in your gynecologist's backyard 445 00:19:09,930 --> 00:19:12,899 planting a pear tree. 446 00:19:12,966 --> 00:19:14,767 That's right. And after this, 447 00:19:14,835 --> 00:19:17,103 we have a whole row of morning glories to plant, 448 00:19:17,171 --> 00:19:18,338 so keep it moving. 449 00:19:18,406 --> 00:19:20,273 Why the hell am I pushing the damn wheelbarrow? 450 00:19:20,341 --> 00:19:21,341 He's your doctor! 451 00:19:21,409 --> 00:19:23,309 Just keep it down. How's it going? 452 00:19:23,377 --> 00:19:25,257 Not good. I don't know what I'm looking at here. 453 00:19:25,282 --> 00:19:26,315 I think I'm gonna cry. 454 00:19:27,981 --> 00:19:29,149 Deacon, what are you doing? 455 00:19:29,216 --> 00:19:30,336 Relax. The guy's out of town. 456 00:19:30,404 --> 00:19:31,771 I just want to check out his place. 457 00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:34,004 What's he got going on in there? 458 00:19:34,071 --> 00:19:36,673 Oh, my God! He's got vaginas in jars! 459 00:19:39,309 --> 00:19:41,745 I think those are peaches. 460 00:19:46,550 --> 00:19:48,217 Oh. 461 00:19:48,285 --> 00:19:49,953 Oh, yeah, yeah. 462 00:19:50,021 --> 00:19:51,904 Can you guys get back to work, please? 463 00:19:51,972 --> 00:19:53,422 Aw, man. 464 00:19:53,491 --> 00:19:55,959 I never felt like less of a man in my life. 465 00:19:57,895 --> 00:20:00,296 Oh, this is just a joke! 466 00:20:00,364 --> 00:20:02,632 Turn it off! 467 00:20:02,700 --> 00:20:05,135 I don't know where it's probably on a timer! 468 00:20:05,203 --> 00:20:07,163 You guys, don't worry about it. Just keep digging. 469 00:20:07,188 --> 00:20:08,705 What?! What? It's just water! 470 00:20:08,772 --> 00:20:10,223 What are you, a big baby? 471 00:20:10,291 --> 00:20:12,825 Oh, my God, look at this! 472 00:20:12,893 --> 00:20:16,162 He's got the charmaster 8000! He's got my grill! 473 00:20:18,832 --> 00:20:22,435 With a Patriots logo! That is so wrong! 474 00:20:28,759 --> 00:20:30,260 And that's it. 475 00:20:30,327 --> 00:20:32,262 We are done here. 476 00:20:32,329 --> 00:20:34,063 Really? 477 00:20:34,131 --> 00:20:38,101 Wow. That was delightful. 478 00:20:38,168 --> 00:20:39,753 Super. 479 00:20:39,820 --> 00:20:41,771 I can't tell you how happy I am 480 00:20:41,839 --> 00:20:43,773 that I don't have to go to Dr. Ambrose anymore. 481 00:20:43,841 --> 00:20:45,508 Thank you so much for fitting me in. 482 00:20:45,576 --> 00:20:47,994 Well, normally you'd have to wait at least a year, 483 00:20:48,062 --> 00:20:50,864 but you called on the right day. 484 00:20:50,931 --> 00:20:53,466 I came home early from my vacation last night 485 00:20:53,534 --> 00:20:55,602 and found 2 of my patients 486 00:20:55,670 --> 00:20:58,104 soaking wet, standing in a hole in my backyard 487 00:20:58,172 --> 00:21:01,841 slapping each other. Can you imagine? 488 00:21:01,909 --> 00:21:04,861 There are a lot of sick people in this world. 489 00:21:16,039 --> 00:21:17,240 Hello? 490 00:21:17,308 --> 00:21:18,708 Hello, Carrie? 491 00:21:18,775 --> 00:21:21,744 This is Dr. Ambrose. 492 00:21:21,812 --> 00:21:24,013 Oh, hi. 493 00:21:24,081 --> 00:21:25,781 What's up? 35202

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.