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1
00:00:24,916 --> 00:00:30,916
Sync && corrections by XhmikosR
www.addic7ed.com
2
00:00:35,317 --> 00:00:36,884
- Good morning.
- Hey, Deac.
3
00:00:36,951 --> 00:00:39,153
Didn't Doug tell you I have
my law firm picnic today?
4
00:00:39,221 --> 00:00:41,701
Actually, Arthur left me a message
saying come over right away.
5
00:00:41,723 --> 00:00:43,324
It's "code blue."
6
00:00:43,392 --> 00:00:44,592
You know what that means?
7
00:00:44,660 --> 00:00:46,561
Yeah, code blue. Could be
anything from chest pains
8
00:00:46,628 --> 00:00:48,496
to "look what I made
out of paper clips."
9
00:00:48,564 --> 00:00:51,399
Dad, Deacon's here!
10
00:00:51,466 --> 00:00:53,200
Send him down.
11
00:00:56,571 --> 00:00:59,474
Any way he can come up here?
12
00:00:59,541 --> 00:01:01,275
I've never been down there.
13
00:01:01,343 --> 00:01:05,162
Hey, dad, why don't you come
up here and talk to him, OK?
14
00:01:05,230 --> 00:01:06,397
No can do.
15
00:01:06,465 --> 00:01:08,999
This matter is
far too intimate.
16
00:01:11,036 --> 00:01:13,971
If he's wearing a robe,
eyes up, OK?
17
00:01:16,274 --> 00:01:18,676
Are you really gonna make me wear
this shirt to this stupid picnic?
18
00:01:18,744 --> 00:01:20,311
Yes. Would you
stop complaining?
19
00:01:20,378 --> 00:01:22,313
You look adorable.
20
00:01:22,380 --> 00:01:24,849
I look like fruit-striped gum.
21
00:01:28,654 --> 00:01:32,357
The people I work with
are gonna be there.
22
00:01:32,424 --> 00:01:33,992
You need to look nice.
23
00:01:34,059 --> 00:01:36,194
What was wrong with
the t-shirt I had on?
24
00:01:36,261 --> 00:01:38,562
OK, not sure my bosses
need to know
25
00:01:38,630 --> 00:01:41,431
that you're an official
bikini inspector.
26
00:01:45,403 --> 00:01:48,422
Well, this shirt's
got a rip in it.
27
00:01:48,489 --> 00:01:50,491
I just bought that.
Where?
28
00:02:00,452 --> 00:02:02,286
Right here.
29
00:02:08,377 --> 00:02:10,111
Be right with you, son.
30
00:02:10,178 --> 00:02:11,612
Grab yourself a seat.
31
00:02:29,430 --> 00:02:32,583
So, Arthur, what's going on?
32
00:02:32,651 --> 00:02:34,735
Well, I was tracing
my ancestry,
33
00:02:34,803 --> 00:02:37,505
and I had these documents
sent to me.
34
00:02:37,573 --> 00:02:40,341
Turns out my great-grandfather
had a small farm,
35
00:02:40,409 --> 00:02:44,278
and on that farm
he had some...
36
00:02:44,346 --> 00:02:49,033
Chickens?
E-i-e-i-o?
37
00:02:49,101 --> 00:02:51,718
No. He had--
38
00:02:51,786 --> 00:02:57,558
Let's just say he had a
little help around the house.
39
00:03:00,312 --> 00:03:04,548
Slaves, I tell ya.
The man had slaves.
40
00:03:04,616 --> 00:03:07,802
Wow. OK. Well, um...
41
00:03:07,870 --> 00:03:11,105
You know, a lot of people
had slaves back then.
42
00:03:11,172 --> 00:03:14,358
But this is my family, and I
need to set things straight.
43
00:03:16,628 --> 00:03:18,863
Uh, what are you doing?
44
00:03:18,931 --> 00:03:21,582
I want to write you a check.
45
00:03:25,753 --> 00:03:27,955
For reparations.
46
00:03:28,023 --> 00:03:30,123
Why would you want to pay me?
47
00:03:30,191 --> 00:03:31,342
Well, you're black,
48
00:03:31,409 --> 00:03:35,913
and the only other black
people I know are on TV.
49
00:03:35,981 --> 00:03:37,548
Toss a number at me.
50
00:03:37,616 --> 00:03:39,366
You don't need to
pay me reparations.
51
00:03:39,434 --> 00:03:41,402
You didn't do anything wrong.
52
00:03:41,469 --> 00:03:44,055
My family committed
a crime against humanity,
53
00:03:44,122 --> 00:03:45,423
and I'm gonna make it right!
54
00:03:45,490 --> 00:03:47,224
Toss a number at me.
55
00:03:47,292 --> 00:03:48,876
OK, look, how about this.
56
00:03:48,944 --> 00:03:51,611
Why don't you just pay me
what you owe me from poker?
57
00:03:51,679 --> 00:03:53,481
That is a separate issue!
58
00:03:53,549 --> 00:03:57,034
Arthur, it's very nice that you're
so concerned about slavery,
59
00:03:57,102 --> 00:04:01,939
but as you may or may not
know, I'm already free.
60
00:04:02,007 --> 00:04:05,409
So we're good.
61
00:04:05,477 --> 00:04:06,811
I gotta go.
62
00:04:06,878 --> 00:04:08,312
Are you sure?
63
00:04:08,380 --> 00:04:10,281
I wouldn't want things
to get weird between us.
64
00:04:10,348 --> 00:04:12,283
That ship has sailed.
65
00:04:25,263 --> 00:04:27,314
That's 2 dead!
66
00:04:27,382 --> 00:04:28,949
2 dead!
67
00:04:29,017 --> 00:04:32,219
And that's how I found out
I'm lactose intolerant.
68
00:04:32,287 --> 00:04:35,822
That's... wild.
69
00:04:35,890 --> 00:04:37,424
All right,
this next guy's a lefty!
70
00:04:37,492 --> 00:04:39,710
Cover the line!
He came your way last time,
71
00:04:39,777 --> 00:04:42,512
Mrs. Randolf!
72
00:04:42,580 --> 00:04:46,300
On top of that,
now I'm allergic to wheat.
73
00:04:46,367 --> 00:04:47,601
Oh.
74
00:04:47,668 --> 00:04:49,286
And you know
how much I love bread.
75
00:04:49,354 --> 00:04:52,273
Yep, that is your rep.
76
00:04:52,341 --> 00:04:54,842
Oh, it looks like we're
back out in the field.
77
00:04:54,909 --> 00:04:56,109
We'll pick this up
next inning.
78
00:04:56,144 --> 00:04:58,145
Absolutely. OK.
79
00:04:58,213 --> 00:05:00,981
Unless I'm hiding
in the porta-potty.
80
00:05:01,049 --> 00:05:02,516
Did you see that catch?
81
00:05:02,583 --> 00:05:03,384
Yes, I did.
82
00:05:03,535 --> 00:05:06,136
You are running around
like a lunatic out there.
83
00:05:06,204 --> 00:05:08,255
All right, come on.
I made my rounds, we can go.
84
00:05:08,323 --> 00:05:09,040
What?
85
00:05:09,107 --> 00:05:11,342
You dragged me here,
now I'm having fun.
86
00:05:11,409 --> 00:05:14,645
Besides, we got a chance
of winning this thing.
87
00:05:14,713 --> 00:05:17,865
Doug, nobody cares
about this thing but you.
88
00:05:17,933 --> 00:05:21,618
For god's sake, the shortstop
has a full plate of chicken.
89
00:05:21,686 --> 00:05:24,188
OK, see right there, that's the
difference between you and I.
90
00:05:24,256 --> 00:05:27,792
When it comes to picnic softball,
you got nothing in here.
91
00:05:27,859 --> 00:05:29,393
Excuse me.
92
00:05:31,913 --> 00:05:34,715
While I'm up, would you
get me a plate of chicken?
93
00:05:58,640 --> 00:06:01,592
Yeah! Whoo-hoo!
94
00:06:01,659 --> 00:06:03,527
Ha ha ha! You!
95
00:06:03,595 --> 00:06:05,612
Oh, my god!
96
00:06:11,419 --> 00:06:13,420
Yeah!
97
00:06:19,161 --> 00:06:21,462
Hey, babe, you ready
to hit El Cholo's?
98
00:06:21,530 --> 00:06:22,746
Uh, yes, we will eat,
99
00:06:22,814 --> 00:06:25,215
just as soon as you
apologize to Mr. Thompson.
100
00:06:25,283 --> 00:06:29,053
You lured me down
here with Mexican food?
101
00:06:29,121 --> 00:06:32,673
Yes. And once again,
it worked.
102
00:06:32,741 --> 00:06:34,158
OK, here he comes.
103
00:06:34,226 --> 00:06:36,093
Uh, Mr. Thompson,
do you have a second?
104
00:06:36,161 --> 00:06:39,646
Doug, you remember Mr.
Thompson and Mr. Kaplan,
105
00:06:39,715 --> 00:06:40,848
one of the senior partners.
106
00:06:40,916 --> 00:06:42,282
Oh.
How you doing?
107
00:06:42,350 --> 00:06:45,419
- Good to see you again.
- How's it going? Oh.
108
00:06:45,486 --> 00:06:47,021
- Hey.
- Hey.
109
00:06:48,256 --> 00:06:50,040
Yeah, Doug just wanted
to apologize
110
00:06:50,108 --> 00:06:51,575
for running into you
like that at the game.
111
00:06:51,643 --> 00:06:52,610
Right, honey?
112
00:06:52,678 --> 00:06:54,244
Yeah, I'm sorry about that.
113
00:06:54,313 --> 00:06:57,481
I guess you won't be blocking the
plate next time, though, will you?
114
00:06:57,549 --> 00:07:00,133
Oh, don't worry about it.
It's his own fault.
115
00:07:00,201 --> 00:07:02,201
That's what happens when
you let a corporate lawyer
116
00:07:02,203 --> 00:07:04,104
do a litigator's job.
117
00:07:08,643 --> 00:07:10,877
That is funny.
118
00:07:10,945 --> 00:07:13,097
Anyway, this is great.
Thank you so much.
119
00:07:13,165 --> 00:07:14,514
I like the way you play, Doug.
120
00:07:14,583 --> 00:07:15,716
I like your hustle.
121
00:07:15,784 --> 00:07:16,800
Really?
122
00:07:16,868 --> 00:07:18,969
Carrie, could you
grab us some coffee?
123
00:07:19,037 --> 00:07:20,117
Doug, you want some coffee?
124
00:07:20,138 --> 00:07:21,538
Sure.
125
00:07:21,606 --> 00:07:22,906
Honey, you know how I like it.
126
00:07:26,511 --> 00:07:28,812
Sure. Be right back,
sweetie.
127
00:07:28,880 --> 00:07:32,065
You know, our firm has a team.
128
00:07:32,133 --> 00:07:34,968
We play in the lawyers' league
Saturdays in the park,
129
00:07:35,036 --> 00:07:38,506
and I am sick of getting
our heinies kicked.
130
00:07:38,573 --> 00:07:40,741
How'd you like
to come play for us?
131
00:07:40,809 --> 00:07:43,227
I'm not a lawyer.
132
00:07:43,295 --> 00:07:44,544
Well, nobody has to know that.
133
00:07:44,612 --> 00:07:46,246
Yeah!
134
00:07:46,314 --> 00:07:47,965
You get out there,
you fudge it.
135
00:07:49,300 --> 00:07:51,468
You could do that for us,
couldn't you, Doug?
136
00:07:51,536 --> 00:07:54,238
Well, I do like fudge.
137
00:07:54,306 --> 00:07:58,409
Excuse me, I really don't
think that's a good idea.
138
00:07:58,476 --> 00:07:59,676
Oh, I think it's a great idea.
139
00:07:59,711 --> 00:08:01,445
Why am I not drinking coffee?
140
00:08:01,513 --> 00:08:03,113
Right.
141
00:08:03,181 --> 00:08:04,301
So how would this work, now?
142
00:08:04,315 --> 00:08:07,651
I just show up at the ball
field carrying a briefcase?
143
00:08:07,719 --> 00:08:09,286
Oh, you're marvelous.
144
00:08:09,354 --> 00:08:11,756
No. You just tell them
you're new to the firm.
145
00:08:11,823 --> 00:08:14,658
We'll set you up with a phone
line here in case anybody calls.
146
00:08:14,726 --> 00:08:17,077
We'll have Carrie
answer the phone.
147
00:08:17,145 --> 00:08:18,945
Won't that be cute?
148
00:08:19,013 --> 00:08:21,732
If I can just
offer a thought here--
149
00:08:21,799 --> 00:08:24,835
You know what my thought is?
Bagels.
150
00:08:24,903 --> 00:08:27,504
Onion.
151
00:08:36,848 --> 00:08:38,549
- Hey.
- Hey, Carrie.
152
00:08:38,617 --> 00:08:39,983
Is that Deacon?
153
00:08:41,769 --> 00:08:45,005
I need a one-on-one
with you asap.
154
00:08:45,073 --> 00:08:47,391
Well, what is it?
155
00:08:47,459 --> 00:08:49,693
Not here.
156
00:08:54,132 --> 00:08:56,233
So, slugger's wife,
157
00:08:56,267 --> 00:08:59,637
you want to apologize to me
now or later with interest?
158
00:08:59,704 --> 00:09:01,972
And by interest I mean...
159
00:09:02,039 --> 00:09:05,709
Wah wah wah reowrrr.
160
00:09:08,313 --> 00:09:10,614
Stomach cramps?
161
00:09:10,682 --> 00:09:12,432
No. Sex.
162
00:09:12,500 --> 00:09:15,119
And which one of us
is making that noise?
163
00:09:15,186 --> 00:09:17,488
Me, when you do the wah...
164
00:09:17,555 --> 00:09:19,956
Never mind.
All right, the point is
165
00:09:20,024 --> 00:09:21,174
you have nothing to
worry about, all right?
166
00:09:21,242 --> 00:09:22,242
Your bosses love me.
167
00:09:22,310 --> 00:09:23,910
I'm gonna be their ringer,
for god sakes.
168
00:09:23,945 --> 00:09:25,379
Yeah, about that--
169
00:09:25,446 --> 00:09:27,214
What?
170
00:09:27,281 --> 00:09:29,233
Um, look, I think you're
a great softball player.
171
00:09:29,300 --> 00:09:30,667
OK, no doubt about that.
172
00:09:30,735 --> 00:09:32,815
It's just this whole
pretending to be a lawyer thing.
173
00:09:32,837 --> 00:09:36,440
I think we should slip the pin
back in the grenade on that one.
174
00:09:38,192 --> 00:09:40,727
What are you talking about?
You don't think I should play?
175
00:09:40,795 --> 00:09:43,263
No, I don't.
There's many ways
176
00:09:43,330 --> 00:09:44,748
this thing could go south,
and then all of sudden
177
00:09:44,816 --> 00:09:45,816
they don't love you so much,
178
00:09:45,884 --> 00:09:48,085
and then they
don't love me so much.
179
00:09:48,153 --> 00:09:49,770
So what you're saying
is lawyer-wise,
180
00:09:49,837 --> 00:09:53,206
you don't think I have
enough convincibility.
181
00:09:54,725 --> 00:09:56,494
Convincibility?
182
00:09:56,561 --> 00:09:59,864
OK, you're gonna
commit to that word?
183
00:09:59,931 --> 00:10:01,214
Shut up.
184
00:10:02,517 --> 00:10:04,284
I can pass as a lawyer,
no problem.
185
00:10:04,352 --> 00:10:06,587
Doug, look, you can pass
as a lot of things, OK?
186
00:10:06,654 --> 00:10:10,240
Furnace guy, uh, roofer,
mall security,
187
00:10:10,392 --> 00:10:12,909
anything in the mall,
really, but lawyer?
188
00:10:14,195 --> 00:10:16,964
That's funny, 'cause
everybody at the firm
189
00:10:17,031 --> 00:10:19,432
seems to think I can
handle it just fine.
190
00:10:19,500 --> 00:10:20,684
They're sending me a limo
for the freakin' games,
191
00:10:20,751 --> 00:10:24,254
and as I recall, they've asked
you to answer my phone!
192
00:10:25,589 --> 00:10:26,957
If you don't watch your step,
193
00:10:27,025 --> 00:10:28,592
you're gonna be making
your next pot of potatoes
194
00:10:28,660 --> 00:10:30,594
on the unemployment line.
195
00:10:33,565 --> 00:10:34,932
Not these, though.
I want these.
196
00:10:36,835 --> 00:10:37,535
Take the check.
197
00:10:37,602 --> 00:10:38,835
- No.
- Please.
198
00:10:38,903 --> 00:10:40,053
I can't sleep.
199
00:10:40,121 --> 00:10:41,906
I was tossing
and turning all night.
200
00:10:41,973 --> 00:10:43,574
My sheets are
soaked with sweat.
201
00:10:43,642 --> 00:10:44,842
- Feel them.
- No, that's all right.
202
00:10:44,910 --> 00:10:46,030
- Feel them!
- I believe you.
203
00:10:46,077 --> 00:10:47,711
Fine. I'll take
the money, OK?
204
00:10:47,779 --> 00:10:49,913
Thank you.
205
00:10:49,981 --> 00:10:53,466
Huh. $237.
206
00:10:53,534 --> 00:10:55,202
I think that's a fair number.
207
00:10:55,270 --> 00:10:56,119
It's a little random.
208
00:10:56,271 --> 00:10:57,904
I mean, how'd you
come up with that?
209
00:10:57,972 --> 00:11:00,174
Simple. There were
12 slaves on the farm,
210
00:11:00,241 --> 00:11:03,076
but my great-grandfather
only owned half the farm.
211
00:11:03,144 --> 00:11:04,928
Of his 6,
2 lived in the house.
212
00:11:04,996 --> 00:11:07,364
Let's face it.
That's a sweet deal.
213
00:11:13,822 --> 00:11:16,256
Doug, we're gonna be
at the game in 10 minutes.
214
00:11:16,324 --> 00:11:17,490
Focus.
215
00:11:17,558 --> 00:11:19,359
Where did you
go to law school?
216
00:11:19,427 --> 00:11:20,660
Excuse me. Ahem.
217
00:11:20,728 --> 00:11:24,081
Jeremy? Doug
from the back again.
218
00:11:24,148 --> 00:11:25,032
Yeah, listen.
219
00:11:25,099 --> 00:11:26,499
Could you goose up
the heat a bit?
220
00:11:26,567 --> 00:11:28,218
I'm a little tight.
221
00:11:28,286 --> 00:11:29,787
Thank you.
222
00:11:31,055 --> 00:11:33,290
You, go.
223
00:11:33,357 --> 00:11:35,726
Where did you
go to law school?
224
00:11:35,794 --> 00:11:37,160
I didn't.
I was homeschooled.
225
00:11:37,228 --> 00:11:39,630
Doug, come on! You said you'd
let me coach you through this.
226
00:11:39,697 --> 00:11:41,498
All right, fine.
If anybody asks,
227
00:11:41,566 --> 00:11:43,434
I'll just say
I went to Stamford.
228
00:11:43,501 --> 00:11:46,637
I'm sorry. Did you just say
"Stamford" with an "m"?
229
00:11:46,704 --> 00:11:48,772
Yeah.
Stamford law school.
230
00:11:48,840 --> 00:11:52,943
OK, the school you're thinking
of is Stanford, with an "n."
231
00:11:53,011 --> 00:11:54,511
No. It's Stamford.
232
00:11:54,579 --> 00:11:55,779
I know.
I delivered there.
233
00:11:55,846 --> 00:11:57,314
I've seen the sign.
234
00:11:57,381 --> 00:12:01,067
OK, dumb-ass, you're thinking
of Stamford, Connecticut, OK?
235
00:12:01,135 --> 00:12:04,121
Stanford law school
is in California.
236
00:12:05,023 --> 00:12:06,239
You know what?
237
00:12:06,307 --> 00:12:08,175
I don't like all this
negativity before a game.
238
00:12:08,242 --> 00:12:10,360
It's disco time.
239
00:12:29,180 --> 00:12:31,782
How long you been
at Kaplan Hornstein?
240
00:12:31,850 --> 00:12:33,717
Actually, I, uh, just started.
241
00:12:33,785 --> 00:12:35,019
Where were you before that?
242
00:12:35,086 --> 00:12:39,823
I was over at Carson...
Daly... and Leibowitz.
243
00:12:52,871 --> 00:12:55,739
Doug Heffernan's office.
244
00:12:55,807 --> 00:12:57,975
No, Doug.
No messages.
245
00:13:10,738 --> 00:13:13,090
So, the bailiff walks in,
and he's like, "all rise."
246
00:13:13,158 --> 00:13:14,158
I'm like, "you know what?
247
00:13:14,159 --> 00:13:15,258
I don't feel
like rising today."
248
00:13:15,326 --> 00:13:16,493
And I didn't.
249
00:13:16,561 --> 00:13:18,461
You're crazy, Heffernan.
250
00:13:18,529 --> 00:13:20,363
You know me.
I don't care.
251
00:13:40,201 --> 00:13:41,919
Doug Heffernan's office.
252
00:13:41,986 --> 00:13:45,355
Not loving the way
you're answering my phone.
253
00:13:45,423 --> 00:13:46,740
I'm busy.
254
00:13:46,808 --> 00:13:49,092
I'm just saying you could
be a little friendlier.
255
00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:50,560
"Good afternoon, and thank you
256
00:13:50,628 --> 00:13:52,162
"for calling
Mr. Heffernan's office.
257
00:13:52,230 --> 00:13:54,264
How may I assist you today?"
258
00:13:54,332 --> 00:13:55,632
What do you want?
259
00:13:55,700 --> 00:13:57,380
Just checking to see
if I got any messages.
260
00:13:57,384 --> 00:14:00,336
For the 40th time,
no messages.
261
00:14:00,488 --> 00:14:04,458
Not a whole lot of people
looking for a fake lawyer.
262
00:14:07,361 --> 00:14:09,295
Honey, your other line
is ringing.
263
00:14:09,363 --> 00:14:11,932
Be charming. Use the good
greeting. "Good afternoon" --
264
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,467
Doug Heffernan's office.
265
00:14:14,535 --> 00:14:17,838
Uh, no, he's not in.
266
00:14:17,906 --> 00:14:20,307
Could you hold on
for one second, sir?
267
00:14:20,374 --> 00:14:21,725
Thanks so much.
268
00:14:21,843 --> 00:14:22,943
I gotta call you back.
269
00:14:23,011 --> 00:14:23,727
Wait. Who is it?
270
00:14:23,795 --> 00:14:25,862
Gary Rogers from
Epstein & Epstein.
271
00:14:25,930 --> 00:14:28,732
He's calling to congratulate you
on a great game on Saturday.
272
00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:30,634
Really?
Patch me through.
273
00:14:30,701 --> 00:14:32,369
No, I'm not going
to patch you through.
274
00:14:32,437 --> 00:14:34,037
He's a senior partner.
275
00:14:34,105 --> 00:14:36,940
I can handle it. Do your
job, and you patch me through.
276
00:14:37,008 --> 00:14:39,058
Fine, but just
take the compliment,
277
00:14:39,126 --> 00:14:41,795
say "Thank you", and hang up
as fast as you can.
278
00:14:45,349 --> 00:14:47,717
Oh, thanks for
joining us, Doug.
279
00:14:47,786 --> 00:14:49,519
Oh, thanks for calling me.
280
00:14:49,587 --> 00:14:51,872
Nothing like a good mar-tooni
after a tough day at...
281
00:14:51,939 --> 00:14:53,640
Law.
282
00:14:53,708 --> 00:14:54,625
I hear that.
283
00:14:54,692 --> 00:14:55,926
It does get to be a grind.
284
00:14:55,994 --> 00:14:57,527
Yes, it do, but...
285
00:14:57,595 --> 00:14:59,395
I wouldn't trade it for
anything in the world.
286
00:14:59,396 --> 00:15:01,732
Oh, you love your work, huh?
287
00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:04,200
I do. I really do.
288
00:15:10,291 --> 00:15:12,609
In a lot of ways,
uh-ahem--
289
00:15:12,677 --> 00:15:16,113
being a lawyer, which I think
we can agree we all are...
290
00:15:18,016 --> 00:15:22,752
Is a lot like, uh,
being a package delivery guy.
291
00:15:22,820 --> 00:15:24,404
How so, Doug?
292
00:15:24,472 --> 00:15:27,941
Oh, uh, well, you...
knock on doors,
293
00:15:28,009 --> 00:15:31,078
and you hope you
don't get bit by a dog.
294
00:15:31,145 --> 00:15:33,225
Sounds like you've been in
front of judge Farnsworth.
295
00:15:34,532 --> 00:15:35,832
Good old Farnsworth.
296
00:15:35,900 --> 00:15:37,017
Hey, Farnsie!
297
00:15:43,490 --> 00:15:46,910
Oh, anyway, Doug,
let me cut to the chase.
298
00:15:46,977 --> 00:15:48,537
We want to know
if you have any interest
299
00:15:48,579 --> 00:15:51,715
in coming over to Epstein,
Epstein, Rogers & Wolf.
300
00:15:51,782 --> 00:15:54,985
To do what?
301
00:15:55,053 --> 00:15:57,353
I don't know.
Corporate litigation?
302
00:15:57,421 --> 00:15:58,688
We'll find a place for you,
303
00:15:58,756 --> 00:16:02,542
as long as you bring that
big bat of yours with you.
304
00:16:02,610 --> 00:16:05,912
So, what's Kaplan
paying you over there?
305
00:16:07,232 --> 00:16:10,067
Oh, I-I get the going rate...
306
00:16:10,134 --> 00:16:14,571
And an extra $10
for each conviction.
307
00:16:14,638 --> 00:16:18,575
Well, I'm prepared to
offer you a base of 150,000.
308
00:16:18,643 --> 00:16:19,776
What do you say?
309
00:16:32,807 --> 00:16:34,040
Hey, guys.
310
00:16:35,209 --> 00:16:36,459
Why are you wearing a suit?
311
00:16:36,527 --> 00:16:39,396
What'd you do?
312
00:16:40,497 --> 00:16:42,565
Nothing. Just had a little
power lunch with the boys
313
00:16:42,633 --> 00:16:45,068
over at Epstein,
Epstein, Rogers and...
314
00:16:45,136 --> 00:16:46,937
- Wolf?
- Bingo.
315
00:16:47,004 --> 00:16:48,355
You had lunch with them?
316
00:16:48,422 --> 00:16:51,424
I told you just to say
thank you and hang up!
317
00:16:53,995 --> 00:16:57,330
To which I responded,
"I carry my own knife."
318
00:16:57,398 --> 00:16:59,265
Well, what the hell
did you talk about?
319
00:16:59,333 --> 00:17:01,901
Well, first,
we talked about our kids--
320
00:17:01,969 --> 00:17:04,971
by the way,
if it comes up, we have 2.
321
00:17:06,407 --> 00:17:07,474
And then--
322
00:17:07,541 --> 00:17:09,242
well, then
they offered me a job.
323
00:17:09,310 --> 00:17:10,577
What?
324
00:17:10,645 --> 00:17:11,895
Don't worry.
I'll bring you over with me,
325
00:17:11,963 --> 00:17:14,347
you know, once I get settled.
326
00:17:14,414 --> 00:17:15,949
You took the job?
327
00:17:16,017 --> 00:17:18,051
Well, not yet,
but I'm mulling it over.
328
00:17:18,118 --> 00:17:19,685
Congratulations, Douglas.
329
00:17:21,572 --> 00:17:23,239
He's not a lawyer.
330
00:17:23,307 --> 00:17:24,540
You're not a lawyer.
331
00:17:24,609 --> 00:17:25,809
Really? Why
don't you tell that
332
00:17:25,843 --> 00:17:27,460
to the 2 firms
currently wooing me?
333
00:17:27,528 --> 00:17:29,829
My god.
Are you insane?
334
00:17:29,897 --> 00:17:31,114
The man just made lawyer.
335
00:17:31,181 --> 00:17:33,717
Why do you have
to piss all over it?
336
00:17:35,035 --> 00:17:36,470
I'll tell you why.
'Cause that's what she does.
337
00:17:39,574 --> 00:17:41,695
As far as I'm concerned,
if they hire him as a lawyer,
338
00:17:41,709 --> 00:17:43,209
he's a lawyer.
339
00:17:43,277 --> 00:17:44,917
When I got hired as
a school psychologist,
340
00:17:44,962 --> 00:17:46,463
do you think I knew the
first thing about it?
341
00:17:46,530 --> 00:17:47,263
Thank you.
342
00:17:47,331 --> 00:17:49,049
Thank you.
343
00:17:50,551 --> 00:17:52,352
Well, thank you
very much, dad.
344
00:17:52,420 --> 00:17:53,820
Could you-what?
Could you move this crap?
345
00:17:53,888 --> 00:17:55,088
What is this?
346
00:17:55,156 --> 00:17:57,390
That's my ancestry report.
347
00:17:57,458 --> 00:17:58,991
This isn't even for you.
348
00:17:59,060 --> 00:18:01,928
This is for Arthur Spinner.
349
00:18:06,367 --> 00:18:08,434
Deacon, thank you for the
ride to the senior center.
350
00:18:08,502 --> 00:18:09,970
You drive wonderfully.
351
00:18:10,037 --> 00:18:11,537
You're welcome,
and by the way,
352
00:18:11,605 --> 00:18:12,572
with that money you gave me,
353
00:18:12,639 --> 00:18:14,357
I put some sweet new
speakers in my car.
354
00:18:14,425 --> 00:18:16,042
Here. Check it out.
355
00:18:16,110 --> 00:18:17,777
Marvelous. Very rhythmic.
356
00:18:17,845 --> 00:18:21,998
That being said,
you'll have to return them.
357
00:18:22,065 --> 00:18:23,800
What?
358
00:18:23,868 --> 00:18:26,536
I got the wrong
ancestry report.
359
00:18:26,604 --> 00:18:28,805
My family were
actually Irish gypsies.
360
00:18:28,872 --> 00:18:32,676
We never owned slaves.
We were drunken thieves.
361
00:18:33,660 --> 00:18:34,678
So?
362
00:18:34,745 --> 00:18:37,681
So I want my money back.
363
00:18:37,748 --> 00:18:40,066
Look, you forced me to take
the money in the first place.
364
00:18:40,134 --> 00:18:42,001
I bought speakers.
They're now part of my car.
365
00:18:42,069 --> 00:18:43,429
I'm not giving you
your money back.
366
00:18:43,470 --> 00:18:46,022
- Well, I think you are!
- Oh, I think I'm not!
367
00:18:46,089 --> 00:18:48,591
Damn it, man! You took those
reparations under false pretenses.
368
00:18:48,659 --> 00:18:52,211
No, I took those reparations to get
the hell out of your basement.
369
00:18:54,298 --> 00:18:55,832
Look, Arthur,
370
00:18:55,900 --> 00:18:57,333
I'd give you your money
back if I could,
371
00:18:57,401 --> 00:19:00,270
but I'm sorry. I just don't
have the cash right now.
372
00:19:01,756 --> 00:19:03,556
Well, what about this?
373
00:19:03,624 --> 00:19:07,026
In lieu of cash,
maybe you can pay me back
374
00:19:07,094 --> 00:19:10,630
in some type of... services.
375
00:19:10,698 --> 00:19:12,582
Huh?
376
00:19:12,649 --> 00:19:14,584
You know, help out
around the house.
377
00:19:14,651 --> 00:19:16,820
Perhaps...
378
00:19:16,887 --> 00:19:19,355
Work the yard a bit.
379
00:19:23,594 --> 00:19:27,013
You want me to be your slave?
380
00:19:28,599 --> 00:19:29,732
It's not my first choice,
381
00:19:29,800 --> 00:19:32,669
but it would get us
out of this mess.
382
00:19:39,693 --> 00:19:41,795
Hey. Did you talk to Rogers?
383
00:19:41,862 --> 00:19:42,962
Did you tell him no yet?
384
00:19:43,030 --> 00:19:44,363
No, I haven't
talked to him yet.
385
00:19:44,431 --> 00:19:45,932
I'm still mulling.
386
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:49,269
And you're still not a lawyer.
387
00:19:57,111 --> 00:20:00,346
I'd be an awesome lawyer.
388
00:20:02,166 --> 00:20:03,633
Oh!
389
00:20:45,325 --> 00:20:47,661
Oh, god!
390
00:20:47,728 --> 00:20:50,396
Oh, that is not good!
391
00:20:52,382 --> 00:20:55,402
Boy, they sure yanked that
limo pretty quick, huh?
392
00:20:58,406 --> 00:21:00,206
Shamahama!
393
00:21:02,731 --> 00:21:08,731
Sync && corrections by XhmikosR
www.addic7ed.com
28099
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