All language subtitles for Diary.of.a.future.president.S02E08.LAZY.English-WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

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Where do I even begin, Diary?

Muy presidencial.

The Student Rep race was gonna be tight,

even with my campaign squad behind me.

But you're not all in the clear.

Rashmi's got the mathletes.
Emilio's got the athletes.

And then, my mom went out of town.

It's gonna be fine, Ma.

Except it wasn't fine.

Because we threw an unsupervised
party for Bobby and his new friends.

Yeah, well. Maybe that's because
my new friends don't embarrass me.

Which didn't turn out
exactly as he planned.

And we thought we got away
with the party until...

What party?

My stomach hurts, and my hands are cold.

Can you check my pulse to
make sure I'm still alive?

Elena, can you chill?

I cannot "chill."

I'm a first-time offender. I
don't know how any of this works.

Why won't Mami just tell
us our punishment already?

She'll probably make us
sweat it out for a while.

What?

Weirdo.

I can't believe they threw a party.

Elena doesn't break the rules.

She didn't even have a lemonade stand

because she couldn't
obtain a vendor's permit.

Gab, I'm so sorry. I checked
in with them every 30 minutes.

I shoulda just skipped poker.

Hey, this is not on you. They
took advantage of both of us.

They were supposed to be watching
The Great British Baking Show.

We have to do something.

Right?

Yeah. We have to lay down the
law. You and me, a united front.

Just like Marguerite and
those candied cherries.

God, their lies were so specific.

Are we gonna go? They
can't get away with this.

Mm-mmm. Not yet. We're gonna make
them sweat it out for a while.

They're gonna charge you for that robe.

What? Oh, God.

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Melissa! What's up?

We've been driving to my
grandpa's for six hours

and are somehow still in Florida.

- Honey, your turn.
- Again, Mom,

I don't wanna play "I Spy."
I'm busy running a campaign.

Rashmi dropped out.

Of school? Of society?

Oh, the race. Sorry. I'm a mess.

Wait, Rashmi dropped out of the race?

There you go.

Mathletes made Nationals, so
now she's gotta focus on prep.

It's a real boys club, so we
appreciate the work she's doing.

- Thank you, Rashmi.
- Thank you, Rashmi.

Now, her votes are up for grabs.

Spring break is usually a dead week,

which is why I agreed
to be trapped in a car

with my family for
like half of my life...

... but now it'll just be a
scramble between you and Emilio.

You need to put in a lot of face
time to secure Rashmi's votes.

No problem. Melissa, I
think we can win this thing.

- You're both grounded for two weeks.
- What?

Wait, what? That's not fair.

I'm on spring break. Bobby
at least gets to go to school.

I only get to go to
school? Are you kidding me?

I know I'm hilarious, but
for once this is no joke.

Okay. So I'll go to campaign
events and nothing else.

What? You can't go to campaign
events. Grounded means grounded.

But, Mami, Rashmi
dropped out of the race.

Campaigning right now is crucial.

You'll campaign in two weeks.

- Are you kidding me?
- Okay, what about Night League?

Again, grounded means grounded.

Come on, Ma!

I mean, you were young. Once.

Aren't we allowed to make mistakes?

Mami, this is my future
we're talking about.

Do you even want me to win Student Rep?

Hey, it's not just your mom.

Oh, come on.

Mom, two weeks is like
ten years in high school.

- Can't you let me off with a warning?
- You can't do this, okay?

- Please?
- Please?

You can still do the
campaign events, right?

Not for two weeks. This is a nightmare.

Did you tell your mom
we're in the final stretch?

That we only have a month left?

You... The vote to...
Malala's that one...

Sasha, you keep breaking up.

It's 'cause she's a free
woman, cruising the open ocean,

away from Wi-Fi signals and
crushing prison sentences.

I'm so jealous.

I'm stuck on this dumb mountain,

and they won't allow
kids in the hot tub.

I'm so sor... Wi-Fi... Engine room.

I think what Sasha's trying to say is

that Emilio's already
getting his face out there.

Yeah. He was a guest judge
for the Rubik's Cubers,

and he helped out the air
guitar band with their car wash.

I heard Poetry Club is
doing a slam tomorrow night,

and they wanted a Student
Rep candidate to emcee.

He'll probably do that too.

No. Let me do it. I have to do it.

How? You're a prisoner.

We can figure something out.
Right, Melissa? I can just video in.

I guess that could work.

We'll say it's a part of
your pro-technology platform.

"Elena is the future."

Oh, I like that.

I'll text them now.

Great! Gotta run.

We just got to the Pensacola dinosaurs,

and my mom's really into
perspective photography.

- You're missing it, honey!
- I'm literally coming.

I tried talking to my cruise
friends... Which means that wh...

Just keep telling yourself that, Elen...

Robertico, what part of "no Night
League" don't you understand?

It is school and home. That's it.

Trouble in paradise?

Remember at poker when you said
I had nothing to worry about?

Kids lied and threw a party.

Ah, just as you feared. They
took advantage of the sub.

Wait, I'm not the sub.
I'm a vice principal.

Or the cool teacher
that enriches their lives

and sits backwards in his chair.

That's probably why
they threw the party.

You shouldn't be part of
the school system at all.

You should just be a parent.

Hey, we both laid down the law. I
even said, "Grounded means grounded."

Gabi and I are a team.

I don't care that you
don't love me. I love you.

... and that's final.

All right. Bye, Mom.

Hey. Can I sit with you?

Oh, hey, uh...

Is this about the party? I, um...

I wanted to tell you I'm
sorry. That wasn't cool of me.

It's not about the party.

Jada dumped me.

Whoa, I'm... I'm sorry,
dude. What happened?

Something about how she hasn't
been single in high school

and needs to find her
identity without me.

That's rough.

I mean, she might be right.
I joined a whole club for her.

But I have a composting garden now.

And my grandma loves that thing.
How am I gonna break it to her?

Hey. You can still compost.

True.

I guess we did get wrapped up
in each other a bit there, huh?

Yeah, a little bit.

I mean...

You really liked each
other, so... I got it.

You gonna be okay though?

Yeah, I'm okay.

And my gran and I are making
eucalyptus candles from the garden,

so that should help.

Wait, why aren't you talking
to Danny and Ziggy about this?

I don't know, man.

They just don't get me like you do.

Well, I'm here if you want to talk.

And I really am sorry about the party.

I got so caught up in impressing...

Uh, my new friends, and,
um... I was out of line.

It's okay. We're all good.

And for the record, I begged
Danny not to bring that keytar.

Elenita, dinner!

I'm going to eat some dinner.
My mom thinks I'm a sinner.

But Ashley's haiku was a winner.

Elenita, put the phone away.

Next up, we have Lynyrd Skynyrd.

Just kidding. It's Albert Friedman
with a sonnet about his dad.

It's time to eat. No
phones at the table.

That doesn't rhyme.

You too, Bobby.

Elena has her phone out.

What part of "no phones at the
table" don't you understand?

Mami, this is a live feed,
and you're killing the vibe.

... and those are all
the ways I love my dad.

Wow! Let's hear it for the son
of the year, Albert Friedman.

Great use of iambic pentameter.

Okay. Bobby, Elena. Phones, now.

Thanks. Right?

- You heard your mom.
- Yeah.

Since I'm a prisoner, this is the
only way I can emcee the poetry slam.

If you really think about it,
you brought my phone to the table.

Ooh, hey, that's good.

Yeah, mine too.

Okay, that's it.

Hey! This is my property.
How can you do this to me?

You can call them after.

It won't be going on after.

And now, an epic in 12 parts.

Sounds like it will.

Are you forgetting that you
are grounded, young lady?

You're ruining my life.

That's it. Two more weeks.

- What?
- What?

- That's not fair.
- You too, buddy.

Can you do that?

Can he do that?

Yes, he can.

I don't like the way you two
have been ganging up on your mom.

Two more weeks. The law has
been laid. End of discussion.

They need to learn they
can't take advantage of us.

Yes, but we have to
show them a united front.

That's what I was doing.

I don't think it is, Sam.

So when I sit backwards in my
chair, they walk all over me,

and when I hand out
detentions, I get suspended?

That doesn't make sense.

Neither does this.

Hey! Bobby.

- Hey.
- Great party.

Thanks. It was fun hanging out with you.

And, you know, everyone.

So, see you at Night League tonight?

I wish. I can't come tonight.

Or... for the next month.

Oh, man. You got busted?

Yeah, and I know we were supposed
to be doubles partners tonight.

Think you can manage without me?

It'll be tough.

Oh, hey, Bobby. CJ, right?

Yeah. Oh, hey, Bobby just bailed
on me as a doubles partner.

Any chance you play tennis?

Yeah. Yeah, I used
to be Bobby's partner.

If you're not busy, you
want to stop by Night League?

Bobby, you can give him the rundown?

Uh, yeah, sure.

- Cool.
- Cool.

Hey, you really threw an awesome party.

Yeah, um... ... you don't
have to go to Night League.

It's, uh, it's kind of
late. It's a whole crew.

I just... I don't know
if it's really your thing.

But it sounds fun.

And I'm totally free since Jada and I

are finding our own identities, so...

Yeah. Thanks, bud.

Of course. I...

I'm sorry. I let you all down.

Who's gonna vote for the candidate

whose mom embarrassed
her on a live feed?

Emilio would be a good
Student Rep, I guess.

Wait, where's Sasha?

Apparently, there's like no
service in the middle of the ocean.

But, Elena...

Have you seen the poetry slam video?

What about it?

The comments, the views, the likes.

What are you talking about?
It was so humiliating.

By "humiliating," do you
mean "relatable"? Go look.

Mom, can you turn the child lock off?

I'm old enough to control my own window.

"Elena's mom destroying
her freedom is all of us."

"My parents are ruining my life too.

They won't let me wear a crop top."

Unfair punishments?
The parental bickering?

People ate it up.

"#ElenaGetsUs." It's trending
in the Orange Bay network.

And "#EmiliolsCoolio" is declining.

Listen. MiniGolfJason says,

"My mom once grounded me too,

and I was like, 'I
didn't ask to be born.'"

That's such a good point.

This might be the best
thing for your campaign.

If your popularity keeps going up,

you have a real shot at
getting Rashmi's votes.

Okay. How do I keep my popularity up?

They want videos. You give them videos.

But don't hold back, okay?

This is a clickbait audience, and
they have short attention spans.

Totally. Got it. Wait, what do you mean?

You gotta keep feeding them.

Keep feeding them.

Oh, my God. People are
making out in the hot tub.

Wait, are those my parents?

I gotta go barf.

So, if the client
pleads guilty Thursday,

we have a shot at a shorter sentence.

Sound good?

Yes. I think it's best.

Unless, the judge offers a sentence

and a second judge overrules
and extends that sentence

without conferring with the first judge?

But what if the second judge

was trying to be a united
front with the first judge,

who was getting totally
ragged on by the defendants?

The first judge is
used to being ragged on

by the defendants and had it covered.

I was just doing what we agreed on.

I'm sorry for trying to help you out.

We're set for Thursday.

Keep feeding them. Keep feeding them.

Okay.

Hello, Orange Bay Middle.

Thank you for your sweet words
about what happened during slam.

As you know, I am grounded, and my
sentence just got upped to a month.

Good one, rAiNbOwLuVr4.

That's not a sentence.
That is a paragraph.

My mom is being so unfair, as you saw.

You want more mom stories? Okay.

Oh, this morning she got all mad at me

for not putting my dish in the sink.

I still had like five Floatie-O's left.

I didn't know there was
a time limit on breakfast

when I'm on house arrest, you know?

I couldn't have said it
better myself, MermaidBianca.

I am a prisoner in my own home...

... and my mother is the warden.

Yes, of course I have more stories.

Wait till you hear what she said

when I asked if I could
shave above the knee.

Spoiler alert! It wasn't yes.

Wow. There so many likes and comments.

Clearly my experiences mean
something to the student body.

I'll get to all of you, I
promise. Remember, vote for Elena.

Triple-your-pointseramma.

Will you take it?

I'll take it.

Don't put those phones so close to
your face. You're gonna go blind.

These are our eyes, and we're fine.

Sandra Bullockness monster.

I wanna tell her she can't
talk to her mom that way,

but I figure I should
check in with you first.

I got it under control. It's okay, Sam.

What the hell? Who is that?

Robertico. Language.

It's not even a swear.

Yeah, it's in the Bible.
Mami, you're out of control.

Okay, that's enough.

I'm gonna get more popcorn.

Hey, how was Night League?

Oh, yeah. It was great. I
didn't think about Jada at all.

When they turn the headlights on
though, that's a real moment, huh?

It is.

So, uh... did you and CJ win, or...

Oh, no. I didn't play with CJ.

Shay and I went against
him and some other guy.

But we won best out of three.

Ah, yeah, I think, um...

I think CJ posted a
picture with him actually.

- It said, uh, "reunited" ...
- ... I think.

Was it... was it like his older brother

visiting from college or something?

Well, I think they were friends?

But he said he'd be coming
back tonight for a bit,

so I can ask for you, if that...

No. No. I...

No. I mean... ... don't do that. It's...

Are you good, Bobby?

Ah, yeah. Just going a little stir-crazy

from being stuck at home.

Happy you had fun.

Yeah. Yeah, it was a good time.

But hey, you'll be
back before you know it.

Yeah.

And the only makeup my mom
lets me wear is Vaseline.

That's right, UnicornQueen305.
My lips are not a baby's butt.

When your mom wants
you to dress like her,

but you're not feeling the look?

Oh, you want some examples?

Wow, okay. Well, I have a picture.

Wait, I have something even better.

Can you believe this suit?

My mom was so into it.

She cried when I got my
Lavender Orchard VIP card.

It was...

So weird.

Oh! Hi, JoeyFeldstein5.

I agree. This outfit is so insane, lol.

But don't worry. I'll pick my
own clothes for your bar mitzvah.

One time, my mom tried to read my diary.

I know! Invasion of privacy much?

Next time pick up the
new Jodi Picoult novel

instead of my private thoughts.

Seriously, my mom has like one
friend. And she has to pay her.

Oh. Wow. Lot of likes for that one.

Gotta keep feeding them.

My mom always says we're
like two peas in a pod.

More like one pea in one pod
and a second pea that rolled away

from the first pea and
started its own pea plant.

Who knows what I'm talking about?

Wow, there so many comments.

"I need my independence.
I'm 13." I hear that.

"Ever since I snuck out
to a Skyler Zaxton concert,

my dad's been on me."

Hmm.

"My moms are back together, and
they're making my life hell."

Sorry to hear that, Flip.
I get you. All of you.

Wow.

It is really such a privilege
to connect with the student body.

Okay. That's it for today.

Thank you for all the love.

Keep liking and sharing,

and remember, vote for the
Student Rep candidate who gets you.

See you next time.

Who're you talking to?

Oh. A little thing called the public.

I thought being grounded would
be the worst thing in the world,

but I've actually never
been more relatable.

My poll numbers are through the
roof, and I've barely left this room.

Oh, by the way, do you have
any horror stories about Mami?

Uh...

She always leaves lipstick
on my face when she kisses me.

That is so hypocritical.

She can wear lipstick and I can't.

I'm gonna talk about
that in my next video.

What're you doing?

I kinda wanna go to Night League.

I hate missing it, especially
because I have this, uh...

Friend?

Yeah. Friend.

I don't know. It seems like
he's forgetting about me.

Or moving on. Or both.

God, this is stupid.

Then, go to Night League.

You think I should sneak out?

You know that's breaking a rule, right?

The rules are unfair.

If the system isn't just, we
must fight against the system.

At least that's what
AtlanticSubscriber13

said in a comment on one of my videos.

Yeah. I mean, this punishment sucks.

And we're not alone.

There are like thousands of people

who watch my videos
and feel the same way.

Okay, I average like 50 per video,
but not everyone watches live.

Plus, they could be co-viewing

because they, unlike us,
are not stuck in isolation.

Go to him.

Wow. I really thought you
were gonna talk me out of it.

I'm a whole new woman. A
woman caged is a woman changed.

Oh, look at you.

Convincing me to sneak out and
dragging Mom on the Internet.

What? That's what you're doing.

No, Bobby. You don't understand.

I'm connecting with my fellow students.

Yeah, and I'm gonna get out of
here before you change your mind.

Hey.

"Section C. Subsection 15.

Never, under any circumstance,
raise your voice at Mami."

Do know that Elena helped me
write this binder when she was ten?

Wow. When I was ten I licked
a salamander on a dare.

Who is that girl? And what
has she done with my mini-me?

Gab, I'm sorry you trusted me with
the kids and they took advantage.

I didn't want that to happen again,

so I did the two more weeks
thing, which was wrong.

Not necessarily.

It's just, we came up
with a punishment together,

and then you went rogue.

I was trying to help.

I know, and I love you for that,
but I wish you would have told me.

Otherwise I look like I don't
know what I'm doing, which I don't,

but they don't need to know that.

Wait. You don't know what you're doing?

Occasionally I do,
but it changes quickly.

So we have to be on the same
page before making sudden moves.

Sometimes I forget

I have a 15-year head
start on all of this.

You know, I really thought the
longer punishment was a good idea.

That's two more weeks of them
making our lives miserable.

Wow. You're good at this.

You're getting there.

- All right, cool.
- All right.

Look who escaped Alcatraz.
Ready to play some doubles?

I thought you, uh,
already had a partner.

Oh, so you've been checking up on me.

What? No, I... Liam told me that
he and Shay played against...

Yeah. That was my cousin. Drew.

I knew it was family.

I mean, chill.

Hmm, why? You jealous?

What if I am?

Hey, Liam.

Hey. Bobby. You're back.

Uh, yeah. I snuck out.

Oh, great.

Shay, uh... wanted me to come get you

because we're gonna do kickball instead.

Yeah. Um, chill. Uh, let's play.

Let's do it.

- Sasha?
- I can hear you.

I've been trying to get
service this whole cruise.

It's a floating dead zone.

Are you having fun?

Yeah.

They put on Mamma Mia! every night,

and I'm, like, the
coolest kid in teen camp.

Ugh, but I saw bits and
pieces of the poetry slam.

How'd you come back from
that? That was rough.

That's what I thought, but it
went viral. Well, Orange Bay viral.

But it got more views than that
video of Kevin's grandma rapping.

Really? She's iconic.

So now I'm hanging on to the
momentum by making other videos

where I speak truth to power.

I wish I could watch them.

So like open forums
to talk about issues?

Exactly.

One of them that got a lot of
likes was about how my mom makes

these super annoying binders full
of, like, all of this information.

Um... didn't you help her write those?

Well, yes. But, Sash, don't you get it?

Saying these things
about my mom is relatable.

I'm connecting with my constituents.

Okay.

Let me tell you about
this one that did well.

I put on that Lavender Orchard suit
that my mom was so obsessed with,

the one from the Meet the
Candidates that we fixed,

and I talked all about her
questionable fashion sense.

Okay. I hear how that sounds,

but you're not getting any
of this without watching.

Context is everything.

And Joey Feldstein thought my mom's
top ten tech fails was hilarious.

Stop looking at me like
that. You haven't seen them.

Let me tell you about this
other one that did really well

about how my mom makes me text her
four times whenever I go somewhere.

Once when I leave, once halfway
to make sure I'm still alive,

once when I get there,
and once for the chisme.

But that's just thorough
I guess. I'm thorough too.

Saying this stuff out loud
really takes the fun out of it.

The videos are doing
super well, I swear.

I did cowrite a lot of
those binders though.

And one of the rules was

not to throw unsupervised
parties, which I did.

In her house.

And I lied and yelled a lot.

Oh, no. Sasha, what have I done? Sasha?

Sasha? Can you even hear me?

Wait, wait. What about Lavender Orchard?

Hey. Hey. Wait up.

Oh, I... I gotta get
home. I snuck out and...

You avoided me all night after
I saw you talking with CJ.

Yeah, that's because I was
super focused on the game.

I mean, kickball takes
a lot of concentration,

and, you know me.

I'm more of... more
of an arm sports guy,

not a... not a leg sp...

Yep.

Look. CJ and I are friends, okay?

He... he's cool.

Well, you know, if you were more
than friends, that'd be cool too.

We're not.

But...

it'd be kinda chill if we were.

That's great, Bobby.

Yeah?

Yeah. Look, I hope it works out.

Thanks, man.

Of course.

I've been sweating this
conversation for a long time.

Yeah, but look. I just want you
to be happy, dude. All right?

If there's ever a thunderstorm
in the middle of the night,

my mom will run into my room
to make sure I'm quote "okay."

No. I'm not. You woke me up.

We live in a tropical climate.
This happens all the time.

Hey, number one in the polls.
You got a ton of virtual requests.

A Q&A and an AMA. Both want
you putting your mom on blast.

You've been invited
to do a panel for kids

who wanna divorce their parents.

I mean, we know you're
not there yet, but...

I can't do it.

Oh, no. Is your mom taking
away your computer now?

Called it.

I mean, what about my relationship
with my mom has anything

to do with how good of
a Student Rep I'll be?

This isn't about your mom.
It's about getting votes.

But I don't want to
get my votes this way.

I thought I was being here for everyone,

but I was really just
being there for myself.

I'm gonna make one more video

about all the things
I respect about my mom

instead of the little
stuff that annoys me.

Then, I'm going to
delete everything else.

This is a flip-flop.
I don't know if we can spin it.

Yeah. I don't see that
video getting many likes.

I'll like it. That's what matters.

Well, you can't like your
own video. That's insane.

But I get what you're saying.

I broke the rules. I got grounded.

And now I'm gonna use the rest of
my break to work on my final speech.

No pressure.

But you gotta knock it out of the park

if you're gonna come back from this.

I think I can do that.

Fine.

I spy something...

pastel.

Ooh, pastel. That's a toughie.

I'm sorry, Mami,

for throwing the party,
for yelling at you,

for agreeing with MiniGolfJason.

What?

Nothing.

Thank you for apologizing.

But you're still grounded.

I know.

I love you.

Hmm. I love you too.

Hey, Elena? Didn't I ask you to
empty the dishwasher this morning?

Could you do it now, please?

You better do what Sam says.

No problem. I'm happy to help.

Four likes. Me, Melissa,
Jessica and Sasha.

You know, sometimes what is
right is not always popular

and what is popular is not always right.

My mom and I put that
quote in a binder one time.

Ooh, Diary, did you miss me?

I was busy using the
Internet as my diary.

Let's just say, I do not recommend.

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