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In last week's episode of Soap,
Chester had a plan.
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00:00:06,072 --> 00:00:08,073
To keep from being lonelyin the basement,
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00:00:08,074 --> 00:00:10,576
he made friends with a pet ratnamed Arnold.
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00:00:10,577 --> 00:00:12,578
Unfortunately,
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00:00:12,579 --> 00:00:14,079
Benson didn't know he was a pet.
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00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:15,581
This ruined Chester's plan...
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00:00:15,582 --> 00:00:18,083
not to mention any plansArnold might have had.
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00:00:18,084 --> 00:00:19,585
Meanwhile,
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00:00:19,586 --> 00:00:21,587
Burt told Danny a planto help him change Elaine.
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00:00:21,588 --> 00:00:24,089
And Carol told Jody her planto keep the baby.
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00:00:24,090 --> 00:00:25,591
Tim and Corinne's planfor their wedding night
12
00:00:25,592 --> 00:00:27,092
was interrupted
13
00:00:27,093 --> 00:00:30,596
by a call from Tim's mothersaying she was dying.
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00:00:30,597 --> 00:00:32,097
Tim, who was sureshe was faking,
15
00:00:32,098 --> 00:00:34,600
decided to go to herimmediately...
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00:00:34,601 --> 00:00:36,101
or by the weekend,at the latest.
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00:00:36,102 --> 00:00:37,603
Dutch had to go on the run,
18
00:00:37,604 --> 00:00:39,104
but planned to returnto see Eunice.
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00:00:39,105 --> 00:00:40,606
And Chester,
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00:00:40,607 --> 00:00:43,108
although he hadn't plannedanything of the kind,
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00:00:43,109 --> 00:00:45,110
had an attackand was rushed to the hospital.
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Confused?
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00:00:46,613 --> 00:00:47,613
You won't be
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00:00:47,614 --> 00:00:50,116
after this week's episodeof Soap.
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00:00:53,119 --> 00:00:56,121
This is the storyof two sisters,
26
00:00:56,122 --> 00:00:58,123
Jessica Tate...
27
00:00:58,124 --> 00:01:00,626
and Mary Campbell.
28
00:01:00,627 --> 00:01:02,629
These are the Tates.
29
00:01:04,130 --> 00:01:06,632
And these are the Campbells.
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00:01:08,134 --> 00:01:10,636
And this is... Soap.
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00:01:37,664 --> 00:01:40,666
At approximately 9:05,
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00:01:40,667 --> 00:01:42,167
the doorbell rang, then what?
33
00:01:42,168 --> 00:01:43,669
Then what?
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00:01:43,670 --> 00:01:44,670
I told you.
35
00:01:44,671 --> 00:01:45,671
Tell us again.
36
00:01:45,672 --> 00:01:46,672
Tell us again.
37
00:01:46,673 --> 00:01:48,173
I went to the door.
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00:01:48,174 --> 00:01:49,675
I opened it.
39
00:01:49,676 --> 00:01:52,177
I discovered Mr. Tate
on the doorstep, unconscious.
40
00:01:52,178 --> 00:01:53,178
I don't know how much longer
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00:01:53,179 --> 00:01:55,180
I can stand this waiting.
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00:01:55,181 --> 00:01:56,181
Don't worry, Mother,
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00:01:56,182 --> 00:01:57,182
I'm sure we're gonna hear soon.
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00:01:57,183 --> 00:01:58,684
You'd think they'd have
45
00:01:58,685 --> 00:02:00,185
a pinball machine
or something around here.
46
00:02:00,186 --> 00:02:02,187
Billy...
47
00:02:02,188 --> 00:02:03,689
Hey, a person can be sad
48
00:02:03,690 --> 00:02:05,190
and still play pinball
at the same time.
49
00:02:05,191 --> 00:02:07,192
Mrs. Tate.
50
00:02:07,193 --> 00:02:09,194
Mrs. Tate, your husband
is still in a coma.
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00:02:09,195 --> 00:02:10,696
Oh...
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00:02:10,697 --> 00:02:13,198
And we won't have the tests back
for at least 24 hours.
53
00:02:13,199 --> 00:02:14,199
Oh, the poor, dear man.
54
00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:16,201
And you can't do
anything until then?
55
00:02:16,202 --> 00:02:17,703
Well, I'm afraid
my hands are tied...
56
00:02:17,704 --> 00:02:21,206
But there is someone here
who just might be able to help.
57
00:02:21,207 --> 00:02:23,709
It's this lad right over here.
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00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:25,210
Me?
59
00:02:25,211 --> 00:02:26,211
I don't understand.
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00:02:26,212 --> 00:02:27,713
Well, you see, Mrs. Tate,
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00:02:27,714 --> 00:02:29,715
there's still very little
we know about the power of love.
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00:02:29,716 --> 00:02:31,216
Just a few minutes ago,
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00:02:31,217 --> 00:02:32,718
your husband
spoke his son's name
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00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:34,720
and seemed
to draw strength from it,
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00:02:34,721 --> 00:02:36,722
and I feel
if we brought this boy
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00:02:36,723 --> 00:02:38,223
to his father's bedside,
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00:02:38,224 --> 00:02:40,726
he just might mean
the difference
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00:02:40,727 --> 00:02:42,728
between life and death.
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00:02:42,729 --> 00:02:44,229
Well, yes.
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00:02:44,230 --> 00:02:46,231
Certainly, by all means.
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00:02:46,232 --> 00:02:47,733
You must be quite a human being
72
00:02:47,734 --> 00:02:49,735
to have touched
another person so deeply.
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00:02:49,736 --> 00:02:52,237
Thank you, sir.
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00:02:52,238 --> 00:02:53,739
This way, Arnold.
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00:02:56,743 --> 00:02:58,243
Um, doctor!
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00:02:58,244 --> 00:02:59,745
Doctor, I believe there's been
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00:02:59,746 --> 00:03:00,746
a slight misunderstanding.
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00:03:00,747 --> 00:03:04,249
This is Billy.
This isn't Arnold.
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00:03:04,250 --> 00:03:05,751
Oh.
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00:03:05,752 --> 00:03:07,753
Arnold was a rat.
81
00:03:07,754 --> 00:03:09,755
Well, personality aside,
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00:03:09,756 --> 00:03:11,256
I still feel
if we can locate this Arnold
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00:03:11,257 --> 00:03:12,758
and bring him to Mr. Tate...
84
00:03:12,759 --> 00:03:14,259
No, no, that's not
possible, Doctor.
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00:03:14,260 --> 00:03:15,761
Benson killed Arnold.
86
00:03:15,762 --> 00:03:16,762
All right!
87
00:03:16,763 --> 00:03:18,764
Come on, buddy,
hands flat on the wall!
88
00:03:18,765 --> 00:03:20,265
I had him pegged from the start.
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00:03:20,266 --> 00:03:22,267
There was something
about his eyes.
90
00:03:22,268 --> 00:03:23,769
And, of course,
the color of my skin
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00:03:23,770 --> 00:03:26,272
has got nothing to do with it.
92
00:03:27,273 --> 00:03:29,775
Stop that.
Arnold was a real rat.
93
00:03:29,776 --> 00:03:30,776
A pet rat.
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00:03:30,777 --> 00:03:32,277
A rodent.
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00:03:32,278 --> 00:03:33,779
I killed him with a broom.
96
00:03:33,780 --> 00:03:34,780
Oh.
97
00:03:34,781 --> 00:03:37,282
I still don't like
those eyes of his.
98
00:03:37,283 --> 00:03:38,283
That's nothing.
99
00:03:38,284 --> 00:03:41,787
I don't like your entire body.
100
00:03:41,788 --> 00:03:42,788
Look, Mrs. Tate,
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00:03:42,789 --> 00:03:44,790
why don't you go home
and get some sleep?
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00:03:44,791 --> 00:03:45,791
I'll call you
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00:03:45,792 --> 00:03:47,292
as soon as I get
the reports back.
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00:03:47,293 --> 00:03:48,293
Thank you, Doctor.
105
00:03:48,294 --> 00:03:49,294
Sure.
106
00:03:49,295 --> 00:03:50,796
Uh, when you came upon Mr. Tate,
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00:03:50,797 --> 00:03:53,298
did any of you see this man
lurking in the area?
108
00:03:53,299 --> 00:03:56,301
Goes by the name of Dutch.
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00:03:56,302 --> 00:03:57,302
No. No.
No, no. Uh-uh.
110
00:03:57,303 --> 00:03:58,303
Thank you.
No!
111
00:03:58,304 --> 00:04:00,305
Just routine.
112
00:04:00,306 --> 00:04:01,306
Wait a minute.
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00:04:01,307 --> 00:04:02,808
Let me see that picture.
114
00:04:02,809 --> 00:04:06,311
Why, I've seen this man.
115
00:04:06,312 --> 00:04:07,312
You have?
116
00:04:07,313 --> 00:04:08,814
Of course.
117
00:04:08,815 --> 00:04:11,818
It's Benito Mussolini, you boob.
118
00:04:13,820 --> 00:04:14,821
Thank you.
119
00:04:15,822 --> 00:04:16,822
Uh, Officer?
120
00:04:16,823 --> 00:04:18,824
Do you think I might have that?
121
00:04:18,825 --> 00:04:20,325
Just in case I see
somebody suspicious
122
00:04:20,326 --> 00:04:21,326
in the neighborhood?
123
00:04:21,327 --> 00:04:22,327
Okay, sure, but be careful.
124
00:04:22,328 --> 00:04:23,829
He's considered dangerous.
125
00:04:23,830 --> 00:04:24,830
Thank you.
126
00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:26,832
I'll get the car
and meet you around front.
127
00:04:26,833 --> 00:04:27,833
Thank you, Benson.
128
00:04:27,834 --> 00:04:28,834
Billy, Major.
129
00:04:30,837 --> 00:04:33,338
Well, I... I suppose
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00:04:33,339 --> 00:04:34,339
you know why
I wanted the picture,
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00:04:34,340 --> 00:04:35,841
don't you, Mother?
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00:04:35,842 --> 00:04:38,343
Yes, Eunice. I know.
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00:04:38,344 --> 00:04:40,345
What do you think?
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00:04:40,346 --> 00:04:42,848
I think he looks
better in person.
135
00:04:42,849 --> 00:04:45,350
No, Mother.
I mean, about us.
136
00:04:45,351 --> 00:04:46,852
Well, Eunice,
137
00:04:46,853 --> 00:04:48,353
it's very hard
for me to approve.
138
00:04:48,354 --> 00:04:50,856
I mean, the man's
a convicted killer...
139
00:04:50,857 --> 00:04:54,860
but then, of course,
so is Daddy.
140
00:04:54,861 --> 00:04:56,361
And an embezzler too.
141
00:04:56,362 --> 00:05:00,866
Yes, so it's hard for me
to disapprove too.
142
00:05:00,867 --> 00:05:02,868
The difference is, Eunice,
143
00:05:02,869 --> 00:05:04,870
when your father and I
first started out,
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00:05:04,871 --> 00:05:07,372
we had all kinds
of possibilities.
145
00:05:07,373 --> 00:05:08,373
The world was ours.
146
00:05:08,374 --> 00:05:10,876
You and Dutch
wouldn't have that.
147
00:05:10,877 --> 00:05:12,878
But I love him, Mother.
148
00:05:12,879 --> 00:05:14,880
I know, Eunice...
149
00:05:14,881 --> 00:05:18,384
but sometimes love
just isn't enough.
150
00:05:31,397 --> 00:05:33,398
Hey! Hey!
151
00:05:33,399 --> 00:05:35,401
Oh.
152
00:05:40,406 --> 00:05:42,407
New York University?
153
00:05:42,408 --> 00:05:44,409
Don't tell me somebody
in this house
154
00:05:44,410 --> 00:05:46,011
is actually thinking
of going to college?
155
00:05:47,914 --> 00:05:49,414
I am going to go to college.
156
00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:54,920
Does the college know?
157
00:05:54,921 --> 00:05:56,922
"Does the college know?"
158
00:05:58,424 --> 00:06:00,425
Well, it may come
as a shock to you,
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00:06:00,426 --> 00:06:01,927
things have changed.
160
00:06:01,928 --> 00:06:02,928
For instance,
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00:06:02,929 --> 00:06:04,930
they no longer use
quills and parchments.
162
00:06:04,931 --> 00:06:06,431
Quills and parchments!
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00:06:10,436 --> 00:06:11,937
I really don't care
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00:06:11,938 --> 00:06:13,940
to discuss this
with you, Elaine.
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00:06:21,447 --> 00:06:23,949
Aren't you gonna feel
awfully out of it?
166
00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:26,452
No. Why should I?
167
00:06:27,954 --> 00:06:28,955
Because you're so old.
168
00:06:30,957 --> 00:06:33,959
Elaine, I may not be 20,
but I'm not a dinosaur.
169
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:36,462
A dinosaur!
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00:06:38,965 --> 00:06:40,465
I don't know.
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00:06:40,466 --> 00:06:42,467
If I was your age,
I wouldn't go to college.
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00:06:42,468 --> 00:06:43,468
Probably wouldn't
leave the house.
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00:06:43,469 --> 00:06:44,970
That's it!
174
00:06:47,974 --> 00:06:49,975
Hey, hold it! Whoa!
175
00:06:49,976 --> 00:06:51,476
What's happening?
176
00:06:51,477 --> 00:06:52,978
She's crazy!
I'm going to go upstairs.
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00:06:52,979 --> 00:06:54,980
Take it easy!
Take it easy!
178
00:06:54,981 --> 00:06:56,481
Why didn't you let me...
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00:06:56,482 --> 00:06:57,482
Why didn't you let me kill her?
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00:06:57,483 --> 00:06:58,484
I want to!
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00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:15,500
Ma!
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00:07:15,501 --> 00:07:18,503
Ma, you don't have to kill her,
because we got a plan.
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00:07:18,504 --> 00:07:21,506
Yeah. Listen, it's a great plan.
184
00:07:21,507 --> 00:07:22,507
Oh, good.
What is it?
185
00:07:22,508 --> 00:07:25,510
A knife? Poison? What?
186
00:07:25,511 --> 00:07:28,013
We're gonna kill her
with kindness.
187
00:07:28,014 --> 00:07:30,515
You're gonna kill her
with kindness?
188
00:07:30,516 --> 00:07:32,017
That's right...
189
00:07:32,018 --> 00:07:34,020
and I think it's time
to get started.
190
00:07:36,022 --> 00:07:38,023
You see, what he's gonna do
191
00:07:38,024 --> 00:07:41,526
is not let her dress, eat,
sleep, nothing...
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00:07:41,527 --> 00:07:43,528
because there isn't anything
good enough for her.
193
00:07:43,529 --> 00:07:45,030
And she can't get mad,
194
00:07:45,031 --> 00:07:47,033
because it's all done
out of love, you see?
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00:07:48,034 --> 00:07:50,035
He's gonna kill her
with kindness.
196
00:07:50,036 --> 00:07:52,037
If that doesn't work,
can I just kill her?
197
00:07:52,038 --> 00:07:53,039
Sure.
198
00:07:59,045 --> 00:08:01,547
Your mother needs hormone shots.
199
00:08:04,550 --> 00:08:05,550
Don't.
200
00:08:05,551 --> 00:08:08,053
It's a brand new dress.
201
00:08:08,054 --> 00:08:10,055
Danny!
202
00:08:10,056 --> 00:08:12,557
Oh, I don't want
garbage like this
203
00:08:12,558 --> 00:08:13,559
touching your skin.
204
00:08:16,062 --> 00:08:18,563
Danny, what is going on?
205
00:08:18,564 --> 00:08:20,565
It's not good enough for you.
206
00:08:20,566 --> 00:08:23,569
Nothing good enough for you,
baby.
207
00:08:25,571 --> 00:08:28,073
Well, it's true,
it only costs $400...
208
00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:30,575
$400?
209
00:08:30,576 --> 00:08:31,576
But wait a second...
210
00:08:31,577 --> 00:08:33,078
Well, I'm sorry,
211
00:08:33,079 --> 00:08:34,579
but it won't do.
212
00:08:34,580 --> 00:08:37,583
Not for you.
Not for my woman.
213
00:08:39,585 --> 00:08:41,086
This isn't like you.
214
00:08:41,087 --> 00:08:42,087
Good God!
215
00:08:42,088 --> 00:08:44,089
Look at this garbage.
216
00:08:44,090 --> 00:08:45,590
I'm sorry, Elaine,
217
00:08:45,591 --> 00:08:47,092
but you can forget about these.
218
00:08:47,093 --> 00:08:48,093
No! No! No!
Wait! Wait!
219
00:08:48,094 --> 00:08:49,094
Please...
220
00:08:49,095 --> 00:08:50,595
No, no, absolutely not, no way.
221
00:08:50,596 --> 00:08:51,596
Elaine, I'm sorry, but, uh,
222
00:08:51,597 --> 00:08:53,098
I love you too much
223
00:08:53,099 --> 00:08:56,102
to see you dressed
in rags like this.
224
00:08:58,604 --> 00:08:59,604
Elaine...
225
00:08:59,605 --> 00:09:00,605
What?
226
00:09:00,606 --> 00:09:01,606
What the hell is that?
227
00:09:01,607 --> 00:09:02,607
What?
That!
228
00:09:02,608 --> 00:09:03,608
What? Oh!
229
00:09:03,609 --> 00:09:04,609
This!
230
00:09:04,610 --> 00:09:06,111
Oh, no!
231
00:09:06,112 --> 00:09:07,612
Danny stop!
Stop it!
232
00:09:07,613 --> 00:09:09,114
You nuts?
233
00:09:09,115 --> 00:09:11,117
Look at how flimsy that is.
234
00:09:13,619 --> 00:09:15,120
I don't believe this.
235
00:09:16,622 --> 00:09:17,622
Don't sit!
236
00:09:25,631 --> 00:09:27,632
This cushion is not clean.
237
00:09:27,633 --> 00:09:30,135
Other people have sat here.
238
00:09:30,136 --> 00:09:31,136
Danny!
239
00:09:31,137 --> 00:09:33,638
We have to be
at a restaurant in 15 minutes.
240
00:09:33,639 --> 00:09:35,140
Let me see
if I can find something
241
00:09:35,141 --> 00:09:36,141
to wear, okay?
242
00:09:36,142 --> 00:09:39,144
Maybe I have something
that you like.
243
00:09:39,145 --> 00:09:40,145
Okay.
244
00:09:40,146 --> 00:09:42,648
Okay, I'll go get cleaned up.
245
00:09:54,660 --> 00:09:56,662
I can't keep my hands off you.
246
00:09:57,663 --> 00:09:59,665
And this one is no good either.
247
00:10:06,672 --> 00:10:08,173
So, is it working?
248
00:10:08,174 --> 00:10:09,174
I don't know.
249
00:10:09,175 --> 00:10:10,675
It's a little too soon to tell,
250
00:10:10,676 --> 00:10:12,677
but she seems very confused.
251
00:10:12,678 --> 00:10:14,179
So am I.
252
00:10:15,681 --> 00:10:17,182
Danny.
253
00:10:17,183 --> 00:10:19,184
Oh, you ready so soon, babe?
254
00:10:19,185 --> 00:10:20,185
Is this all right?
255
00:10:20,186 --> 00:10:23,188
Well, that's more like it.
256
00:10:23,189 --> 00:10:24,689
You're sure?
257
00:10:24,690 --> 00:10:26,191
You're sure that you like this?
258
00:10:26,192 --> 00:10:29,195
It looks almost as good as you.
259
00:10:37,703 --> 00:10:39,204
Don't wait up.
260
00:10:39,205 --> 00:10:40,205
Yeah, have a nice time.
261
00:10:40,206 --> 00:10:42,207
Thanks.
262
00:10:44,710 --> 00:10:45,710
I'm sorry,
263
00:10:45,711 --> 00:10:46,711
but it didn't look as good
264
00:10:46,712 --> 00:10:48,213
from the back.
265
00:11:00,726 --> 00:11:02,727
Well?
266
00:11:02,728 --> 00:11:04,229
What do you say?
267
00:11:06,232 --> 00:11:07,732
Carol, generally,
268
00:11:07,733 --> 00:11:09,234
when a girl gets
a marriage proposal,
269
00:11:09,235 --> 00:11:11,737
she looks up
from her Chicken Yakitori.
270
00:11:13,239 --> 00:11:14,740
What about... sex?
271
00:11:21,247 --> 00:11:22,747
What about it?
272
00:11:22,748 --> 00:11:24,749
You said you would never
273
00:11:24,750 --> 00:11:26,251
go to bed with me again.
274
00:11:26,252 --> 00:11:27,752
Uh, call it old-fashioned,
275
00:11:27,753 --> 00:11:29,754
but I consider
sex with my husband
276
00:11:29,755 --> 00:11:30,756
a part of marriage.
277
00:11:40,766 --> 00:11:41,766
Well, I'd try.
278
00:11:41,767 --> 00:11:43,268
You'd try?
279
00:11:43,269 --> 00:11:44,769
Yeah.
280
00:11:44,770 --> 00:11:45,770
Oh, wonderful.
281
00:11:45,771 --> 00:11:48,273
That's a very relaxing
way to live...
282
00:11:48,274 --> 00:11:49,774
with a guy who closes his eyes
283
00:11:49,775 --> 00:11:51,777
and pretends his wife
is Arnold Schwarzenegger.
284
00:11:57,783 --> 00:11:59,284
Carol, I'm not sure,
285
00:11:59,285 --> 00:12:00,785
but I think when one person
286
00:12:00,786 --> 00:12:01,786
asks someone else to marry them,
287
00:12:01,787 --> 00:12:03,288
no one's supposed
to make fun of anybody
288
00:12:03,289 --> 00:12:04,789
for at least a minute or two.
289
00:12:04,790 --> 00:12:06,791
Why are you doing this, guilt?
290
00:12:06,792 --> 00:12:07,792
No.
291
00:12:07,793 --> 00:12:09,794
Well, it's true,
I think I should,
292
00:12:09,795 --> 00:12:11,796
but, Carol, what's also true
293
00:12:11,797 --> 00:12:14,799
is I'm actually kind of excited
about having the baby.
294
00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:17,302
Somehow I never pictured that.
295
00:12:17,303 --> 00:12:18,803
Neither did I.
296
00:12:18,804 --> 00:12:21,806
Well, I'm not what Dr. Spock
had in mind
297
00:12:21,807 --> 00:12:23,808
when he wrote his chapter,
"Becoming A Father."
298
00:12:23,809 --> 00:12:26,311
It's, uh, it's very hard
not to be involved
299
00:12:26,312 --> 00:12:28,813
when you're bringing a new life
into the world.
300
00:12:28,814 --> 00:12:31,316
Carol, this is my baby too.
301
00:12:33,319 --> 00:12:35,320
And since I've been a part
of its beginning,
302
00:12:35,321 --> 00:12:38,323
I want to be a part
of the rest of its life.
303
00:12:38,324 --> 00:12:40,325
It can work, Carol.
304
00:12:40,326 --> 00:12:41,826
We really care for each other,
305
00:12:41,827 --> 00:12:42,827
and we love being together,
306
00:12:42,828 --> 00:12:44,829
and you'd never have to worry
307
00:12:44,830 --> 00:12:47,332
about me looking
at another woman.
308
00:12:49,335 --> 00:12:53,338
I don't know, Jody.
I just don't know.
309
00:12:53,339 --> 00:12:55,340
Carol, I promise you
that if we get married,
310
00:12:55,341 --> 00:12:56,842
I'll never touch another man
again.
311
00:13:00,846 --> 00:13:02,347
Excuse me, please.
312
00:13:02,348 --> 00:13:04,850
I think I just stabbed myself.
313
00:13:16,862 --> 00:13:18,863
What's wrong?
314
00:13:18,864 --> 00:13:20,865
You stick a rusty knife
into my heart
315
00:13:20,866 --> 00:13:22,367
by leaving the priesthood
316
00:13:22,368 --> 00:13:24,369
and you want to know
what's wrong?
317
00:13:24,370 --> 00:13:26,871
Ma, there's no knife
in anybody's heart.
318
00:13:26,872 --> 00:13:29,874
I feel I've got an elephant
on chest...
319
00:13:29,875 --> 00:13:31,376
and he contradicts me.
320
00:13:31,377 --> 00:13:32,877
That's the kind of thing
321
00:13:32,878 --> 00:13:36,381
a mother really wants to hear
just before she dies.
322
00:13:36,382 --> 00:13:39,384
Sorry, Ma, but the dying act
323
00:13:39,385 --> 00:13:40,885
doesn't work anymore.
324
00:13:40,886 --> 00:13:41,886
You're not fooling anyone.
325
00:13:41,887 --> 00:13:44,389
Tim, I don't think you should be
quite so hard on her.
326
00:13:44,390 --> 00:13:45,390
Oh, perfect!
327
00:13:45,391 --> 00:13:46,891
Your mother's at death's door
328
00:13:46,892 --> 00:13:48,894
and you have to bring along
the bimbo!
329
00:13:51,397 --> 00:13:53,398
Well, it's true
we haven't gotten along
330
00:13:53,399 --> 00:13:54,899
quite as well as we might...
331
00:13:54,900 --> 00:13:55,900
Oh, why stop there?
332
00:13:55,901 --> 00:13:57,402
While you're at it,
333
00:13:57,403 --> 00:14:00,405
why don't you just step forward
and spit on the bed?
334
00:14:00,406 --> 00:14:01,406
Ma!
335
00:14:01,407 --> 00:14:03,408
Listen, you just remember
one thing.
336
00:14:03,409 --> 00:14:04,909
You remember
that if anybody asks you
337
00:14:04,910 --> 00:14:06,911
who killed your mother,
338
00:14:06,912 --> 00:14:08,413
remember to say,
339
00:14:08,414 --> 00:14:10,915
"it was me, Timothy Flotsky,
340
00:14:10,916 --> 00:14:12,917
the fallen priest."
341
00:14:12,918 --> 00:14:14,419
Now get out of here
342
00:14:14,420 --> 00:14:15,920
and let me die in peace.
343
00:14:15,921 --> 00:14:17,422
Look, Ma,
344
00:14:17,423 --> 00:14:19,424
I fell in love with Corrine
345
00:14:19,425 --> 00:14:20,925
and...
and I married her.
346
00:14:20,926 --> 00:14:22,427
For the first time in my life,
347
00:14:22,428 --> 00:14:24,429
I did something for me
instead of for you.
348
00:14:24,430 --> 00:14:27,932
It's called
living your own life, Ma.
349
00:14:27,933 --> 00:14:28,933
But, of course,
350
00:14:28,934 --> 00:14:29,934
you wouldn't know about that.
351
00:14:29,935 --> 00:14:31,436
You know...
all you know about
352
00:14:31,437 --> 00:14:32,437
is making my life miserable
353
00:14:32,438 --> 00:14:33,938
and treating Corrine
like garbage.
354
00:14:33,939 --> 00:14:37,442
You're a real expert at that.
355
00:14:37,443 --> 00:14:38,444
Tim?
356
00:14:39,945 --> 00:14:42,447
She's not breathing.
357
00:14:42,448 --> 00:14:44,449
Of course she's not breathing.
358
00:14:44,450 --> 00:14:45,950
She's playing
359
00:14:45,951 --> 00:14:47,952
her "hold my breath until
I get what I want" routine.
360
00:14:47,953 --> 00:14:50,455
Tim, I think she's dead.
361
00:14:50,456 --> 00:14:51,456
She's not dead.
362
00:14:51,457 --> 00:14:52,957
She's dead.
363
00:14:52,958 --> 00:14:54,459
She's not dead.
364
00:14:54,460 --> 00:14:55,460
She's dead.
365
00:14:55,461 --> 00:14:56,961
She's dead!
She's dead!
366
00:14:56,962 --> 00:14:58,463
She's dead.
She's dead.
367
00:14:58,464 --> 00:14:59,464
She's dead.
She's dead!
368
00:14:59,465 --> 00:15:00,965
She's dead!
She's dead!
369
00:15:00,966 --> 00:15:01,967
She's dead!
370
00:15:04,970 --> 00:15:05,970
Okay. I'll tell him.
371
00:15:05,971 --> 00:15:06,971
Right. Okay.
372
00:15:06,972 --> 00:15:07,973
Bye-bye.
373
00:15:11,477 --> 00:15:12,977
Don't you ever go to lunch?
374
00:15:12,978 --> 00:15:15,480
No, I have it catered.
375
00:15:16,482 --> 00:15:18,983
Um, Mr. DiBlazio called.
376
00:15:18,984 --> 00:15:20,485
Said if he doesn't
have a payment
377
00:15:20,486 --> 00:15:21,486
on your wife's loan by Friday,
378
00:15:21,487 --> 00:15:23,488
he sincerely hopes you have
379
00:15:23,489 --> 00:15:25,491
a good orthopedic surgeon.
380
00:15:26,492 --> 00:15:27,992
Oh, no...
381
00:15:27,993 --> 00:15:29,494
Problems?
382
00:15:29,495 --> 00:15:30,995
Yep.
383
00:15:30,996 --> 00:15:33,998
Oh, you're too nice
to have problems.
384
00:15:33,999 --> 00:15:35,500
Thanks, Sal.
385
00:15:35,501 --> 00:15:37,503
You're much too nice.
386
00:15:40,005 --> 00:15:41,506
Uh, Sally?
387
00:15:41,507 --> 00:15:43,508
Uh... uh, Sally,
388
00:15:43,509 --> 00:15:45,009
what are you doing back there?
389
00:15:45,010 --> 00:15:46,010
Nothing.
390
00:15:46,011 --> 00:15:48,012
Uh, Sally, I'm a married man,
391
00:15:48,013 --> 00:15:49,013
remember?
392
00:15:49,014 --> 00:15:51,516
Oh, I'm... I'm sorry.
393
00:15:51,517 --> 00:15:53,017
I'm really sorry.
394
00:15:53,018 --> 00:15:55,019
I... I just got
carried away.
395
00:15:55,020 --> 00:15:57,021
I mean, it's so hard.
396
00:15:57,022 --> 00:15:59,023
Every day I see you,
397
00:15:59,024 --> 00:16:02,527
and you're so...
incredibly good-looking.
398
00:16:04,029 --> 00:16:08,032
You must know
how irresistible you are.
399
00:16:08,033 --> 00:16:11,035
And it's just so hard not to...
400
00:16:11,036 --> 00:16:13,038
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
401
00:16:16,542 --> 00:16:17,542
It's okay.
402
00:16:17,543 --> 00:16:19,544
I'm just really sorry.
403
00:16:19,545 --> 00:16:22,547
Hey, it's really okay.
404
00:16:22,548 --> 00:16:24,549
Anyway...
405
00:16:24,550 --> 00:16:27,051
I'm sure you must be
used to it by now.
406
00:16:27,052 --> 00:16:29,554
Women crawling all over you.
407
00:16:29,555 --> 00:16:31,055
I'm sure you can't even
408
00:16:31,056 --> 00:16:33,057
take public transportation
anymore.
409
00:16:33,058 --> 00:16:35,560
Well, no, that hasn't happened.
410
00:16:35,561 --> 00:16:37,562
I mean,
if Al Pacino ever saw you,
411
00:16:37,563 --> 00:16:39,063
he'd probably never
leave his house again.
412
00:16:39,064 --> 00:16:40,565
I mean, why bother?
413
00:16:40,566 --> 00:16:43,067
Well, I don't know about that.
414
00:16:43,068 --> 00:16:44,569
Believe me.
415
00:16:47,573 --> 00:16:51,576
He is a little short, I hear.
416
00:16:51,577 --> 00:16:54,579
I am sorry, Danny,
and I promise it'll...
417
00:16:54,580 --> 00:16:56,080
it'll never happen again.
418
00:16:56,081 --> 00:16:59,584
From now on,
I'll just look at you...
419
00:16:59,585 --> 00:17:00,586
And be happy.
420
00:17:02,087 --> 00:17:04,088
I don't know, I don't know.
421
00:17:04,089 --> 00:17:05,089
A break is fine,
422
00:17:05,090 --> 00:17:06,090
but I think it's a mistake
423
00:17:06,091 --> 00:17:07,592
for guys
on girders 40 stories high
424
00:17:07,593 --> 00:17:10,596
to be horsing around
with a Frisbee.
425
00:17:11,597 --> 00:17:12,597
I'll go break it up.
426
00:17:12,598 --> 00:17:14,098
Thanks, Danny.
427
00:17:14,099 --> 00:17:15,600
Any messages, Sal?
428
00:17:15,601 --> 00:17:17,602
Nothing, uh-uh.
Oh, good.
429
00:17:17,603 --> 00:17:19,103
I'm so bushed.
430
00:17:19,104 --> 00:17:20,605
Oh, thank you.
431
00:17:23,108 --> 00:17:26,110
Oh... oh, oh.
432
00:17:26,111 --> 00:17:27,612
Oh, that's terrific.
433
00:17:27,613 --> 00:17:30,615
Oh, a massage.
Oh.. oh, boy.
434
00:17:30,616 --> 00:17:32,617
That's terrific.
435
00:17:32,618 --> 00:17:34,118
Oh, massages are wonderful.
436
00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:36,621
I really love that.
437
00:17:36,622 --> 00:17:38,623
Oh, and yes, massaging the head.
438
00:17:38,624 --> 00:17:40,625
That's... nice touch...
very nice touch.
439
00:17:40,626 --> 00:17:42,126
Oh, that's nice.
440
00:17:42,127 --> 00:17:43,628
That's... ooh, hey.
441
00:17:43,629 --> 00:17:45,630
Thank you, thank you...
Thank you very much...
442
00:17:45,631 --> 00:17:47,132
Oh, hey...
Okay, thank you!
443
00:17:49,635 --> 00:17:51,636
Oh, God.
I'm sorry.
444
00:17:51,637 --> 00:17:53,137
I'm really sorry.
445
00:17:53,138 --> 00:17:54,639
It's okay. It's okay.
446
00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:57,142
Your nose got stuck.
That could happen.
447
00:17:59,144 --> 00:18:00,645
It's so hard for me.
448
00:18:02,147 --> 00:18:05,150
I mean, you must know.
You see how women respond...
449
00:18:06,151 --> 00:18:08,152
To what?
450
00:18:08,153 --> 00:18:09,154
To you.
451
00:18:10,656 --> 00:18:11,656
You're at that age...
452
00:18:11,657 --> 00:18:13,157
That time of your life
453
00:18:13,158 --> 00:18:15,660
when you're at
your most attractive.
454
00:18:15,661 --> 00:18:18,162
Well, yeah... well...
455
00:18:18,163 --> 00:18:20,164
Oh, you are.
456
00:18:20,165 --> 00:18:22,667
You're so...
dynamic.
457
00:18:22,668 --> 00:18:24,669
That's what it is.
458
00:18:24,670 --> 00:18:28,172
You're
dy... na... mic.
459
00:18:28,173 --> 00:18:29,674
Oh... Well, I don't know.
460
00:18:29,675 --> 00:18:31,175
Let's see...
461
00:18:31,176 --> 00:18:33,678
I've been taking
this new Vitamin-B complex.
462
00:18:33,679 --> 00:18:35,179
That's probably
what's doing it...
463
00:18:35,180 --> 00:18:36,681
And it's so hard for me
464
00:18:36,682 --> 00:18:38,182
to be around you every day...
465
00:18:38,183 --> 00:18:39,684
to... to have to
look at you
466
00:18:39,685 --> 00:18:42,186
and to feel your presence.
467
00:18:42,187 --> 00:18:44,188
Sometimes I almost feel faint.
468
00:18:44,189 --> 00:18:46,190
Well, that's not eating
a good breakfast, Sal.
469
00:18:46,191 --> 00:18:48,192
You know, that's a feeling
of faintness,
470
00:18:48,193 --> 00:18:49,193
that's all it is.
471
00:18:49,194 --> 00:18:50,194
No.
Yeah...
472
00:18:50,195 --> 00:18:51,195
It's from you.
473
00:18:51,196 --> 00:18:52,697
No, a couple of eggs,
a few sausages,
474
00:18:52,698 --> 00:18:54,699
you'll be just fine.
475
00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:56,701
I look at you, and I get weak.
476
00:18:56,702 --> 00:18:59,705
It's been that way for weeks,
this weakness.
477
00:19:05,210 --> 00:19:10,715
You're the most masculine man...
I've ever seen.
478
00:19:16,221 --> 00:19:17,722
It's the plaid shirt, Sal.
479
00:19:17,723 --> 00:19:19,223
You're responding
to a plaid shirt.
480
00:19:19,224 --> 00:19:21,726
I got to... Where's Danny?
I got to go find Danny.
481
00:19:21,727 --> 00:19:24,228
If I know Danny,
he's joined the Frisbee team.
482
00:19:24,229 --> 00:19:25,730
It's a...
It's a plaid shirt.
483
00:19:25,731 --> 00:19:27,231
And don't you worry about that.
484
00:19:27,232 --> 00:19:30,234
I mean, I've seen it
happen a lot in Oregon...
485
00:19:30,235 --> 00:19:31,235
all the time.
486
00:19:31,236 --> 00:19:33,738
Girls fainting over lumberjacks.
487
00:19:46,251 --> 00:19:48,252
Oh, doctor, are you sure?
488
00:19:48,253 --> 00:19:50,755
Oh, yes, this is definitely
a lesion of the brain.
489
00:19:50,756 --> 00:19:52,256
You see, it's the type of lesion
490
00:19:52,257 --> 00:19:54,759
that can totally alter
a person's behavior.
491
00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:57,261
For example, a completely
mild-mannered person
492
00:19:57,262 --> 00:19:58,763
might suddenly turn violent.
493
00:19:58,764 --> 00:20:01,265
Well, if that's the case,
494
00:20:01,266 --> 00:20:03,267
then surely a man
in his condition
495
00:20:03,268 --> 00:20:04,268
couldn't be held responsible
496
00:20:04,269 --> 00:20:05,269
for his acts.
497
00:20:05,270 --> 00:20:06,771
Oh, no. Certainly not.
498
00:20:06,772 --> 00:20:09,273
Any behavior induced
by the lesion is, of course,
499
00:20:09,274 --> 00:20:10,274
entirely beyond his control,
500
00:20:10,275 --> 00:20:11,776
and as I understand it,
501
00:20:11,777 --> 00:20:13,778
there has been
a recent unpleasantness.
502
00:20:13,779 --> 00:20:16,781
Is he referring to the murder
503
00:20:16,782 --> 00:20:19,283
or the stock fraud?
504
00:20:19,284 --> 00:20:21,786
Well, whatever the problem,
legally speaking,
505
00:20:21,787 --> 00:20:23,788
he is suffering
from temporary insanity,
506
00:20:23,789 --> 00:20:25,289
and this brain scan alone
507
00:20:25,290 --> 00:20:27,291
is medical proof
of his condition.
508
00:20:27,292 --> 00:20:28,793
Well, what can be done?
509
00:20:28,794 --> 00:20:30,795
I mean, about the lesion itself?
510
00:20:30,796 --> 00:20:32,296
We could do nothing
511
00:20:32,297 --> 00:20:33,798
and perhaps the attacks
would subside,
512
00:20:33,799 --> 00:20:34,799
but, on the other hand,
513
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:36,300
he might become
permanently violent,
514
00:20:36,301 --> 00:20:38,803
and lastly,
he might just drop dead.
515
00:20:40,305 --> 00:20:41,806
Now, on the other hand,
516
00:20:41,807 --> 00:20:42,807
we could operate,
517
00:20:42,808 --> 00:20:45,309
but, you see, he might not
survive the operation.
518
00:20:45,310 --> 00:20:47,311
Or he might come out
of the surgery alive,
519
00:20:47,312 --> 00:20:50,315
but with the personality
of a cod fish.
520
00:20:52,818 --> 00:20:56,321
Well, it's nice to have
so many choices.
521
00:20:57,823 --> 00:21:00,324
I just wish
one of them were good.
522
00:21:00,325 --> 00:21:01,325
Y... Y... Yes...
523
00:21:01,326 --> 00:21:03,327
Well, this decision
is... is...
524
00:21:03,328 --> 00:21:04,829
Thank you.
525
00:21:04,830 --> 00:21:06,330
Yours and yours
alone, Mrs. Tate,
526
00:21:06,331 --> 00:21:08,332
and, uh, I'm afraid
527
00:21:08,333 --> 00:21:09,834
that there is simply
not much time.
528
00:21:09,835 --> 00:21:11,836
Oh, yes, I understand.
529
00:21:11,837 --> 00:21:12,837
Of course,
it would be much easier
530
00:21:12,838 --> 00:21:14,338
if this were a routine surgery
531
00:21:14,339 --> 00:21:16,841
but this procedure
is far from routine.
532
00:21:16,842 --> 00:21:18,843
It's the kind of surgery
that requires
533
00:21:18,844 --> 00:21:23,347
an extraordinary combination
of knowledge, skill,
534
00:21:23,348 --> 00:21:26,851
not to mention courage
and stamina.
535
00:21:26,852 --> 00:21:29,353
Yes, well, uh, Jessica,
536
00:21:29,354 --> 00:21:30,855
I think if you had an hour or so
537
00:21:30,856 --> 00:21:31,856
alone with your thoughts,
538
00:21:31,857 --> 00:21:32,857
then maybe...
539
00:21:32,858 --> 00:21:34,859
Yes, sir, if I could
pull this one off,
540
00:21:34,860 --> 00:21:36,861
this would be quite a feat.
541
00:21:36,862 --> 00:21:38,362
Doctor.
542
00:21:38,363 --> 00:21:39,363
Oh, yes!
543
00:21:39,364 --> 00:21:40,865
Well, that's neither here
nor there.
544
00:21:40,866 --> 00:21:42,366
Well, I...
545
00:21:42,367 --> 00:21:44,869
I guess you'd better go ahead.
546
00:21:44,870 --> 00:21:46,370
You want me to go ahead
with the surgery?
547
00:21:46,371 --> 00:21:48,372
Yes!
Oh!
548
00:21:48,373 --> 00:21:50,875
You made a wise decision,
Mrs. Tate.
549
00:21:50,876 --> 00:21:52,376
This will be good
for everyone concerned,
550
00:21:52,377 --> 00:21:54,879
and the chances of your husband
pulling through are very good.
551
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:59,885
And I, of course,
will be launched into stardom.
552
00:22:01,887 --> 00:22:03,387
Oh, Mary...
553
00:22:03,388 --> 00:22:05,890
I didn't know what to do.
554
00:22:05,891 --> 00:22:08,893
Do you think I did
the right thing?
555
00:22:08,894 --> 00:22:10,394
I'm sure you did, Jess.
556
00:22:10,395 --> 00:22:11,896
I'm sure you did.
557
00:22:11,897 --> 00:22:14,899
Golly, it's just such
a difficult decision to make.
558
00:22:14,900 --> 00:22:15,900
I know.
559
00:22:15,901 --> 00:22:17,401
Chester might die.
560
00:22:17,402 --> 00:22:18,903
He won't.
561
00:22:18,904 --> 00:22:20,404
But the doctor said...
No.
562
00:22:20,405 --> 00:22:23,407
He'll be fine,
I just know he will.
563
00:22:23,408 --> 00:22:24,909
Do you think so?
564
00:22:24,910 --> 00:22:26,911
Yes, I do.
565
00:22:26,912 --> 00:22:28,913
Chester is very strong.
566
00:22:28,914 --> 00:22:31,916
That's right. He is, isn't he?
567
00:22:31,917 --> 00:22:35,920
Oh, yes, Mary, do you remember
the winter we all had the flu
568
00:22:35,921 --> 00:22:38,422
and Chester had the flu,
and he did all the cooking,
569
00:22:38,423 --> 00:22:39,423
flu and all?
570
00:22:39,424 --> 00:22:42,927
Of course,
he did all the eating too...
571
00:22:44,429 --> 00:22:47,431
Mary, he's just
got to be all right.
572
00:22:47,432 --> 00:22:49,434
He has to be.
573
00:22:52,938 --> 00:22:55,941
I don't think
I could stand anything else.
574
00:23:01,446 --> 00:23:04,448
I'll buy you a cheeseburger.
575
00:23:04,449 --> 00:23:05,950
With French fries?
576
00:23:05,951 --> 00:23:06,952
Mm-hmm.
577
00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:17,962
Will Burt and Danny's planreally change Elaine?
578
00:23:17,963 --> 00:23:20,965
If it does,what will she change into?
579
00:23:20,966 --> 00:23:22,967
Will Carolaccept Jody's proposal?
580
00:23:22,968 --> 00:23:25,970
Will Tim blame himselffor his mother's death forever?
581
00:23:25,971 --> 00:23:27,972
Or justfor the rest of his life?
582
00:23:27,973 --> 00:23:29,473
What is Sally up to?
583
00:23:29,474 --> 00:23:31,976
And are either Burt or Dannyup to what she's up to?
584
00:23:31,977 --> 00:23:34,979
Will Eunice ever spendanother night with Dutch?
585
00:23:34,980 --> 00:23:36,981
And if so,will there be passion,
586
00:23:36,982 --> 00:23:38,482
desire, lust?
587
00:23:38,483 --> 00:23:40,484
Or at leastsome nice refreshments?
588
00:23:40,485 --> 00:23:42,486
Has Jessica madethe right decision,
589
00:23:42,487 --> 00:23:44,488
to go aheadwith Chester's operation?
590
00:23:44,489 --> 00:23:45,990
And if it doesn't work out,
591
00:23:45,991 --> 00:23:48,993
will she find happinessliving with a cod fish?
592
00:23:48,994 --> 00:23:50,995
These questions and many others
593
00:23:50,996 --> 00:23:53,999
will be answeredon next week's episode of Soap.
594
00:23:59,004 --> 00:24:01,506
Soap is videotapedbefore a studio audience.
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