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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:56,844 --> 00:03:00,388 How embarrassing. Look at that. 2 00:03:00,597 --> 00:03:04,392 If I were with a real guy doing this, I would've gotten a pedicure. 3 00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:06,143 And a wax. 4 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:09,105 Oh, shit, that one's worse. 5 00:03:09,273 --> 00:03:12,024 -Sorry I didn't get a pedicure. -What? 6 00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:15,027 My toes. 7 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,280 -I'm sorry. -I'm not looking at your toes. 8 00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:20,491 -I'm looking at your cervix. -Right. 9 00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:23,286 Now I kind of wish you were looking at my toes. 10 00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:25,913 -All done. -That's it? 11 00:03:26,081 --> 00:03:30,042 We'll elevate your legs for 1 0 minutes and you'll be good to go. 12 00:03:31,670 --> 00:03:34,672 First time I hear that ticking clock and I'm not freaking out. 13 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:38,009 -Good. Just relax. -I can't. I'm totally freaking out. 14 00:03:38,176 --> 00:03:40,052 Come on. Everything's gonna be great. 15 00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:42,221 I have a feeling that you and... 16 00:03:42,431 --> 00:03:46,726 ...CRM-1 014 are gonna make beautiful babies together. 17 00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:51,439 Yeah. Thank you. 18 00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:02,909 Oh, God, I hope this works. 19 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:05,995 I've wanted this for so long. 20 00:04:06,204 --> 00:04:09,916 Maybe this isn't how I pictured it exactly. 21 00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:11,959 Thought I'd have a little more support. 22 00:04:12,127 --> 00:04:17,048 -No! You don't want kids. Trust me. -Easy for you to say. You have four. 23 00:04:17,215 --> 00:04:21,302 -And it's awful. They've ruined my life! -Hi, munchkins. 24 00:04:21,470 --> 00:04:22,845 What? No! Go away! 25 00:04:23,013 --> 00:04:25,890 Have you seen my vagina? I mean, have you? 26 00:04:26,058 --> 00:04:29,393 Because I would show it to you. I will show it to you just to prove... 27 00:04:29,561 --> 00:04:33,397 ...that you don't want to have kids. I will show you my vagina. 28 00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:35,566 I don't want to see that. I want a baby. 29 00:04:35,734 --> 00:04:38,736 I think you're tired of being alone. Haven't met the right guy. 30 00:04:38,904 --> 00:04:43,491 Not about a guy. I've dated hundreds of guys over the past five years. 31 00:04:43,659 --> 00:04:45,534 Not one of them's close to being the one. 32 00:04:45,702 --> 00:04:47,328 It's just not happening for me. 33 00:04:47,537 --> 00:04:50,706 -Yeah, but doesn't mean that it won't. -Doesn't mean that it will. 34 00:04:50,874 --> 00:04:53,417 Is that my chicken? What are you doing? 35 00:04:53,585 --> 00:04:54,669 Give it back! 36 00:04:54,836 --> 00:04:58,798 That is your dinner, not a toy! 37 00:04:59,591 --> 00:05:02,259 I hate them. Do you smell pee? 38 00:05:03,095 --> 00:05:06,180 So, l had to figure it out on my own. 39 00:05:06,348 --> 00:05:10,601 I examined every possibility and arrived at the most logical conclusion. 40 00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:12,728 Will you be my baby-daddy? 41 00:05:13,897 --> 00:05:16,983 What? No, I can't be the father. Are you out of your mind? 42 00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,652 What are you talking--? No. I am in my sexual prime. 43 00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:23,823 I have more women to bed before I do something as idiotic as having a baby. 44 00:05:23,991 --> 00:05:26,993 Clive, you're my friend. Don't you want to help me? 45 00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:30,579 We don't have to have sex. You don't have to be involved at all. 46 00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:33,791 All right? Just give me your sperm. 47 00:05:35,836 --> 00:05:39,755 Okay. Okay, you're feeling lonely, right? 48 00:05:39,923 --> 00:05:41,882 Maybe a little dead down there. 49 00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:45,344 I get it, I get it. Been a long time since you've had, you know. 50 00:05:45,512 --> 00:05:46,554 Just shut up, okay? 51 00:05:46,722 --> 00:05:48,973 -Just forget it. Forget the whole thing! -What? 52 00:05:49,141 --> 00:05:51,267 Well, that was a bust. 53 00:05:51,435 --> 00:05:56,063 So I took life by the horns... 54 00:05:56,231 --> 00:06:00,067 ...and I did what I had to do. 55 00:06:00,444 --> 00:06:02,028 Yeah. 56 00:06:03,530 --> 00:06:05,364 It's gonna be okay. 57 00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:08,200 I have a plan. 58 00:06:10,912 --> 00:06:12,496 Ding. 59 00:06:16,418 --> 00:06:19,253 -You don't have to walk like that. -What? Oh, okay. 60 00:06:19,421 --> 00:06:22,840 By the way, I know an excellent support group for single moms... 61 00:06:23,008 --> 00:06:26,552 -...if you're interested. -Great. Great. 62 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:30,014 Maybe we should hug. We might have just made a baby together. 63 00:06:31,475 --> 00:06:34,351 -Good luck. -Okay. All right. 64 00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:38,939 Hi. 65 00:06:39,107 --> 00:06:40,274 -Hi. -Hi. 66 00:06:52,287 --> 00:06:54,789 -Hi! -Get away from me! 67 00:07:00,295 --> 00:07:01,378 Taxi! 68 00:07:10,013 --> 00:07:11,639 Hallelujah! 69 00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:15,226 Excuse me. This is my cab. 70 00:07:15,393 --> 00:07:18,020 -What, you own it? -No, but I'm about to rent it. 71 00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:22,983 If someone hails a cab and it pulls up, you can't jump in and say it's yours. 72 00:07:23,151 --> 00:07:25,277 -I didn't see you. -I saw you see me. 73 00:07:26,321 --> 00:07:29,740 Sir. Sir, excuse me. Who saw you first? 74 00:07:33,537 --> 00:07:36,622 Look, maybe you're not from around here, but there's a code. 75 00:07:36,832 --> 00:07:40,167 -Certain rules that we try to follow. -Fine! Forget it. I'll get out. 76 00:07:40,335 --> 00:07:43,546 You're not right, but I'm in a terrific mood and you're ruining it. 77 00:07:43,713 --> 00:07:45,422 No, I'll get out. 78 00:07:47,509 --> 00:07:49,301 -Now what? -I don't know. You tell me. 79 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:52,680 -Hey, hey! -Where's he going? Come back! 80 00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:58,727 Well, that was stupid. Why'd you get out, you stupid-head? 81 00:07:58,895 --> 00:08:02,106 You said you were in a great mood and I was ruining it. I felt bad. 82 00:08:02,274 --> 00:08:05,276 I'm sorry, did you just call me a stupid-head? 83 00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:23,460 How's your great mood now? 84 00:08:23,628 --> 00:08:26,213 Please, stop talking to me. 85 00:08:28,925 --> 00:08:32,094 So why are you in such a good mood anyway? 86 00:08:32,262 --> 00:08:35,389 Not that it's your business, but good things are happening to me. 87 00:08:35,557 --> 00:08:37,850 Wow, that's great. I hope it continues. 88 00:08:39,978 --> 00:08:41,437 Thanks. 89 00:08:41,897 --> 00:08:45,566 Well, have a nice life. And try not to steal any more cabs. 90 00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:47,359 Yeah, you do the same. 91 00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:52,198 Hey, there's a penny right there. 92 00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:54,450 Why don't you pick it up? It's good luck. 93 00:08:55,452 --> 00:08:56,911 Only if it's heads. 94 00:09:00,207 --> 00:09:02,958 Now somebody else can have good luck. Bye. 95 00:09:03,668 --> 00:09:05,169 Bye. 96 00:09:36,993 --> 00:09:39,662 Thank you for coming to Hudson Mutts. 97 00:09:39,829 --> 00:09:41,288 Hi, Nutsy! 98 00:09:41,456 --> 00:09:43,415 Oh, my God. You're glowing. 99 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:45,751 -Hello. -Oh, my God. She's glowing, right? 100 00:09:45,919 --> 00:09:47,878 -Tell us everything. -Not much to tell. 101 00:09:48,046 --> 00:09:50,214 You got shot up with red-headed freckle sperm. 102 00:09:50,382 --> 00:09:51,632 There's something to tell. 103 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:54,093 He had red hair and freckles? Why'd you do that? 104 00:09:54,261 --> 00:09:56,220 -Tried to talk her out of it. -Red pubes. 105 00:09:56,388 --> 00:09:58,514 Never saw his pubes. It was a vial of semen. 106 00:09:58,682 --> 00:10:00,975 So come on, what happened? 107 00:10:01,142 --> 00:10:03,269 I lay down, put my feet over my head. 108 00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:06,188 Five minutes later, it was over. I barely felt a thing. 109 00:10:06,356 --> 00:10:09,400 So basically, it was like having sex with Clive. 110 00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:12,486 -You wish. -l'll be in the back, legs over my head. 111 00:10:12,654 --> 00:10:14,863 -Red hair and freckles! -You had your chance! 112 00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,827 -What? -I don't know. It's just weird. 113 00:10:19,995 --> 00:10:21,954 Who is this guy she was with anyway? 114 00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:23,706 She wasn't actually with him. 115 00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:26,750 Yeah, but I still want to kick his ass. Is that wrong? 116 00:10:26,918 --> 00:10:28,544 You're stupid. 117 00:10:52,902 --> 00:10:54,361 Okay, all right. 118 00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:58,198 Welcome to Single Mothers and Proud. 119 00:10:58,408 --> 00:11:02,995 As the name suggests, we are all single, mothers... 120 00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,581 ...and proud. 121 00:11:05,749 --> 00:11:07,166 Hey, all right. 122 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:08,917 Okay. Some of us have adopted. 123 00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:11,587 Some of us have conceived with a donor. 124 00:11:11,755 --> 00:11:15,215 Every story is different, but with the same common denominator. 125 00:11:15,425 --> 00:11:19,053 We wanted a child, and we made it happen on our own. 126 00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:20,888 We sure did. We sure did. 127 00:11:21,056 --> 00:11:26,018 Are you already a single mother or are you trying to become one? 128 00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:28,979 Oh, I was just inseminated a few days ago. 129 00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:33,275 Inseminated. Makes me feel like a cow or something. 130 00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:38,572 Well, we do what we have to do when we don't have a penis partner. 131 00:11:38,740 --> 00:11:41,867 -That's right. -So let's hear about you. 132 00:11:42,077 --> 00:11:47,164 Oh, okay. Let's see. Well, l own a pet store. 133 00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:52,878 Yeah. I used to work in the corporate world, which was great for a while... 134 00:11:53,046 --> 00:11:56,256 ...but it just didn't feel like the life that I wanted to live. 135 00:11:56,424 --> 00:12:03,055 So now I'm happy on the work front, but you know. 136 00:12:03,223 --> 00:12:05,974 I don't know. Even though I have more balance... 137 00:12:06,184 --> 00:12:07,893 ...it's personal. 138 00:12:08,103 --> 00:12:11,688 I still haven't found "the one," so that's why I'm.... 139 00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:14,608 Well, the elusive one. 140 00:12:14,776 --> 00:12:16,026 -Good luck. -Right. 141 00:12:16,194 --> 00:12:18,404 If I had a dollar for every time I heard that. 142 00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:21,073 I thought I'd be married with kids by now... 143 00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:24,076 ...but that's just not happening... 144 00:12:24,786 --> 00:12:28,580 ...so I guess it's time for my backup plan. So. 145 00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:31,792 Well, Zoe, listen. If you really want a baby... 146 00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:35,045 ...we here at Single Mothers and Proud... 147 00:12:36,965 --> 00:12:38,257 ...can be your partners. 148 00:12:38,425 --> 00:12:42,177 From inception to graduation, everything in between. 149 00:12:42,345 --> 00:12:43,846 We can be here for you. 150 00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,183 Great. 151 00:12:48,351 --> 00:12:49,476 Thank you. 152 00:12:49,644 --> 00:12:52,062 Dakota was born right here. 153 00:12:52,230 --> 00:12:54,022 In this very room. 154 00:12:54,649 --> 00:12:57,401 -Right where you're sitting, actually. -Really? 155 00:12:58,903 --> 00:13:00,529 Right here? 156 00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:03,323 Imagine that. Funny. 157 00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:05,617 So how old is your baby now? 158 00:13:06,536 --> 00:13:07,870 I'm 3. 159 00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:11,790 So cute. 160 00:13:12,876 --> 00:13:14,751 Why do you need a support group? 161 00:13:14,919 --> 00:13:17,045 -You're not very supportive. -What? 162 00:13:17,213 --> 00:13:19,173 You just told me that if I breast-feed... 163 00:13:19,340 --> 00:13:22,759 ...my girls are gonna wind up looking like empty tube socks. 164 00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:24,970 Hey, I'm just being honest. 165 00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:29,433 Don't even get me started on what childbirth does to your bladder. 166 00:13:29,851 --> 00:13:32,102 What does it do to your bladder? 167 00:13:34,272 --> 00:13:36,940 I think I just peed a little bit. 168 00:13:38,318 --> 00:13:41,487 Don't think I'm pregnant anyway. Doctor says it takes a few tries. 169 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:44,198 Something about frozen sperm being lazy. 170 00:13:44,407 --> 00:13:45,866 Oh, come with me for a minute. 171 00:13:46,034 --> 00:13:49,828 I have to make some muffins for some bullshit teacher-appreciation day. 172 00:13:49,996 --> 00:13:53,248 -You're gonna make muffins? -Oh, hell, no. 173 00:13:53,416 --> 00:13:55,375 But there's a place here that sells them. 174 00:13:55,543 --> 00:13:58,962 I pick out the worst ones and I pretend I made them. 175 00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:01,632 Come on. 176 00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:04,760 Okay, which is the ugliest? 177 00:14:04,928 --> 00:14:07,304 Seems like a lot of trouble for something trivial. 178 00:14:07,472 --> 00:14:09,181 Welcome to motherhood. 179 00:14:25,740 --> 00:14:28,784 -There's that guy. -What guy? 180 00:14:28,952 --> 00:14:31,787 The one selling cheese. I know him. 181 00:14:31,996 --> 00:14:33,497 He's hot. 182 00:14:35,625 --> 00:14:39,127 -He sells cheese? -You sell hamsters. 183 00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:43,215 -Can I help you ladies? -No. We're good, thank you. 184 00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:46,760 Like what you see? 185 00:14:47,637 --> 00:14:50,389 -What? -Just talking about the muffins. 186 00:14:50,807 --> 00:14:52,558 -Hey, you. -Hey. 187 00:14:54,018 --> 00:14:58,021 Hi. What a nice surprise. How did you know l worked here? 188 00:14:58,940 --> 00:15:00,023 I didn't. 189 00:15:00,984 --> 00:15:02,526 Oh, okay. 190 00:15:02,694 --> 00:15:04,611 Did you follow me here? 191 00:15:04,779 --> 00:15:06,655 Follow you? 192 00:15:06,823 --> 00:15:09,408 To the Farmers' Market? Are you kidding me? 193 00:15:09,576 --> 00:15:13,036 No, we came to buy muffins. You were here. Tell him. 194 00:15:13,204 --> 00:15:15,914 You better buy something. You ate all my samples. 195 00:15:16,958 --> 00:15:21,420 Well, it's really nice to see you, but I never got your name. I'm Stan. 196 00:15:21,796 --> 00:15:23,839 -Oh, Zoe. -Zoe. 197 00:15:24,007 --> 00:15:26,466 I'm Mona. So how do you two not know each other? 198 00:15:26,634 --> 00:15:28,594 -He stole my cab. -She stole my cab. 199 00:15:30,638 --> 00:15:31,722 Okay. 200 00:15:33,683 --> 00:15:35,350 We should go. 201 00:15:35,518 --> 00:15:37,811 -We should? -Yeah, we have that important thing. 202 00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:39,855 Can your thing wait just a few minutes? 203 00:15:40,023 --> 00:15:41,773 I'll give you a taste of my cheese. 204 00:15:44,819 --> 00:15:46,612 I can rephrase that. 205 00:15:46,821 --> 00:15:49,364 Okay. This is our basic ch�vre. 206 00:15:49,574 --> 00:15:53,702 Probably our best seller and the cheese that started it all, as they say. 207 00:15:53,911 --> 00:15:57,122 These are our surface-ripened cheeses. These are fantastic. 208 00:15:57,290 --> 00:16:01,168 And these are the aged raw-milk cheeses. Now-- 209 00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:06,131 This is really boring, isn't it? 210 00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:08,008 -No. -Yes. 211 00:16:08,885 --> 00:16:10,719 This is Louie. He works for me. 212 00:16:11,346 --> 00:16:12,554 -Hi. -Hi. Zoe. 213 00:16:12,722 --> 00:16:13,764 -Zoe. -Mona. 214 00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:16,433 -Can I give you a sample box? -Oh, yeah. 215 00:16:16,601 --> 00:16:17,976 -I'm okay. -We're okay. 216 00:16:18,144 --> 00:16:20,896 You're not lactose intolerant, are you? l hate that. 217 00:16:21,064 --> 00:16:23,273 Hey. You're still coming over tonight, right? 218 00:16:25,526 --> 00:16:27,194 Yeah. Yeah. 219 00:16:29,113 --> 00:16:30,530 We should go. 220 00:16:31,199 --> 00:16:33,492 -Are you ready? -I want a sample box. 221 00:16:33,660 --> 00:16:36,244 Okay. Well, I gotta go. Bye. 222 00:16:38,081 --> 00:16:43,585 Bye. 223 00:16:44,420 --> 00:16:46,296 -You said free sample box, right? -Yes. 224 00:16:46,464 --> 00:16:47,631 -Free? Okay. -Absolutely. 225 00:16:47,799 --> 00:16:49,675 In that case.... 226 00:16:58,726 --> 00:17:00,894 Okay, spill it. Who is he, what does he do... 227 00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:02,979 -...how do we know him? -Who? 228 00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:07,109 Stan from the Farmers' Market. He's called twice already. 229 00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:08,944 I'm gonna kill Mona. 230 00:17:09,320 --> 00:17:11,029 Is he a farmer? 231 00:17:13,449 --> 00:17:16,118 -He makes cheese. -He's a Pilgrim? 232 00:17:16,327 --> 00:17:18,120 Mona said his feta was incredible. 233 00:17:18,329 --> 00:17:19,955 That makes so much more sense now. 234 00:17:20,123 --> 00:17:21,456 Who is this guy? 235 00:17:21,624 --> 00:17:23,750 He's nobody. He's just some guy. 236 00:17:23,918 --> 00:17:26,795 -Are you blushing? -You're totally blushing. 237 00:17:26,963 --> 00:17:29,131 Can we calm down, get ready for the book signing? 238 00:17:29,298 --> 00:17:30,382 -No. -This is exciting. 239 00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:31,633 I'm not calming down. 240 00:17:31,801 --> 00:17:34,803 He's nobody. And even if he was somebody, it doesn't matter... 241 00:17:34,971 --> 00:17:37,889 ...because I don't want to be with anybody. Okay? 242 00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:40,058 So let's just get back to work. 243 00:17:40,685 --> 00:17:44,229 -Finding a relationship is work. -I don't want a relationship. 244 00:17:45,273 --> 00:17:47,232 Well, it is. 245 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:49,151 Yo, taxi. 246 00:17:49,318 --> 00:17:52,112 So dogs have an ingrained pack mentality. 247 00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:54,448 If we don't assert leadership over our dogs... 248 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:58,827 ...our dogs are going to show unstable behaviour or dominant behaviour. 249 00:17:58,995 --> 00:18:01,538 In other words, in the dog world... 250 00:18:01,706 --> 00:18:04,875 ...who you are is stable or unstable energy, leader or a follower. 251 00:18:05,042 --> 00:18:09,045 So when a dog introduces himself to another dog, what do they do? 252 00:18:10,673 --> 00:18:13,258 Exactly. When a human wants to meet a dog: 253 00:18:13,426 --> 00:18:16,344 "Oh, my God, he's so--" 254 00:18:16,512 --> 00:18:19,848 So I mean, it's like, poor dog, you know? 255 00:18:21,058 --> 00:18:24,811 And so they're interacting based on energy and also the nose.... 256 00:18:24,979 --> 00:18:26,521 Okay. Now this is getting weird. 257 00:18:26,689 --> 00:18:29,483 I know. We keep running into each other. It's crazy. 258 00:18:29,650 --> 00:18:31,943 So your being here is just another coincidence? 259 00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:34,988 -Oh, no. I love this guy. -Don't you have someplace... 260 00:18:35,156 --> 00:18:37,073 -...to be tonight? -Not till later. 261 00:18:37,241 --> 00:18:38,408 Do you even have a dog? 262 00:18:38,576 --> 00:18:42,746 No. But I might get one now that I can "be the pack leader." 263 00:18:42,914 --> 00:18:45,916 The dogs would just shake it. "Do you want to play again?" 264 00:18:46,501 --> 00:18:49,044 -I'm really busy here. -You have a boyfriend. 265 00:18:49,212 --> 00:18:50,837 -Just tell me. I can take it. -No. 266 00:18:51,005 --> 00:18:53,131 You just know you're not interested in me? 267 00:18:53,299 --> 00:18:56,176 You're making a big mistake. I'm very interesting. 268 00:18:57,011 --> 00:18:59,346 I'm just not interested in men right now, okay? 269 00:18:59,514 --> 00:19:02,682 -Oh, you're gay? -I'm not gay. 270 00:19:03,226 --> 00:19:04,392 -Quiet. -Hey, you two. 271 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:06,186 Would you please take it outside? 272 00:19:06,354 --> 00:19:08,230 -Sorry. -Okay, sorry about that. 273 00:19:08,397 --> 00:19:10,273 -That was awkward. -Yeah. 274 00:19:10,733 --> 00:19:15,278 This is not a good time for me, okay? I'm going through some changes. 275 00:19:15,446 --> 00:19:16,780 Menopause? 276 00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:19,366 Menopause? Seriously? 277 00:19:19,534 --> 00:19:20,784 How old do you think l am? 278 00:19:20,952 --> 00:19:22,327 Let's start over. 279 00:19:22,495 --> 00:19:25,288 The more I think about it, we'd never make it as a couple. 280 00:19:25,456 --> 00:19:27,499 You're too sceptical. We should be friends. 281 00:19:27,667 --> 00:19:30,168 -I have enough friends. -You can never have too many. 282 00:19:30,336 --> 00:19:33,296 -What you doing tonight? -Getting take-out, going to bed. 283 00:19:33,464 --> 00:19:36,007 Clearly, you don't have that many friends. 284 00:19:36,509 --> 00:19:38,051 Okay, here's my proposition. 285 00:19:38,219 --> 00:19:40,929 Don't freak out. It requires very little commitment. 286 00:19:41,097 --> 00:19:44,683 I'm getting take-out too. Let's walk together to the same place... 287 00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:48,770 ...order and pay for our own respective meals, and then we'll say goodbye. 288 00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:50,856 Where do you want to go? 289 00:19:57,613 --> 00:19:58,905 -Here you go. -Thank you. 290 00:19:59,073 --> 00:20:02,534 No fair. You chose this place because it takes, like, two seconds. 291 00:20:02,702 --> 00:20:04,995 No, I chose it because it's the best. 292 00:20:05,162 --> 00:20:09,165 I want to see you take a bite of that. I don't believe you're gonna eat it. 293 00:20:10,126 --> 00:20:11,376 Fine. 294 00:20:15,715 --> 00:20:17,883 There. Happy now? 295 00:20:18,301 --> 00:20:20,385 You have no idea how good this is. 296 00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:23,722 Lived in New York your whole life, never gone to Gray's Papaya. 297 00:20:23,890 --> 00:20:26,933 -What's wrong with you? -Haven't lived here my whole life. 298 00:20:27,101 --> 00:20:30,770 We moved out of the city when my parents bought the farm. 299 00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:35,859 No, not died. They actually bought a farm and we moved upstate. 300 00:20:36,193 --> 00:20:39,863 They retired to Phoenix five years ago, and I run the place now. 301 00:20:40,031 --> 00:20:41,823 What about your family? 302 00:20:42,658 --> 00:20:44,993 Actually, my parents died when l was young. 303 00:20:45,161 --> 00:20:47,996 It's just me and my grandmother now. 304 00:20:48,164 --> 00:20:52,584 -I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. -lt's okay. lt was a long time ago. 305 00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:54,210 Look, I really have to go. 306 00:20:54,378 --> 00:20:58,256 All right. But I can't let you walk home alone... 307 00:20:58,424 --> 00:21:01,468 ...because this is a very dangerous neighbourhood. 308 00:21:08,851 --> 00:21:10,727 What school did you go to? 309 00:21:10,895 --> 00:21:12,395 Well, l kind of dropped out. 310 00:21:12,563 --> 00:21:15,607 I met this Swedish girl during my semester abroad and.... 311 00:21:15,816 --> 00:21:19,235 Let me guess. You fell in love and got married. 312 00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:22,948 -And started an inn in Vermont. -Of course. 313 00:21:23,115 --> 00:21:26,451 It lasted like three seconds. I didn't know how to run an inn. 314 00:21:26,619 --> 00:21:30,330 And she didn't know how not to sleep with everyone who worked there... 315 00:21:30,498 --> 00:21:33,166 ...so we got divorced. Yeah, she took everything. 316 00:21:33,334 --> 00:21:36,753 I had to move back in with my parents, work myself out of debt... 317 00:21:36,921 --> 00:21:40,256 ...and figure out how not to blame every woman on the planet... 318 00:21:40,424 --> 00:21:41,883 ...for Ana's whorish ways. 319 00:21:42,051 --> 00:21:45,762 -How's that going? -Not so good. 320 00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:51,184 Okay, I want to know everything. 321 00:21:52,019 --> 00:21:53,645 First kiss? 322 00:21:54,814 --> 00:21:58,525 Some jerk with a dirt bike and chapped lips. 323 00:21:58,693 --> 00:21:59,734 You? 324 00:21:59,902 --> 00:22:03,196 Seventh grade. She wore braces and headgear. It was terrifying. 325 00:22:03,364 --> 00:22:04,781 Ouch. 326 00:22:05,700 --> 00:22:08,994 Hey. Look. 327 00:22:10,121 --> 00:22:11,788 -Here's one for you. -That's weird. 328 00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:18,044 Okay, best kiss? 329 00:22:20,464 --> 00:22:21,798 That's a tough one. 330 00:22:22,508 --> 00:22:27,012 Because if we weren't just friends, I'd kiss you right now. 331 00:22:27,179 --> 00:22:29,014 Then I'd be your best kiss. 332 00:22:30,433 --> 00:22:31,766 How do you know? 333 00:22:33,602 --> 00:22:35,186 I know. 334 00:22:47,491 --> 00:22:49,743 Is someone looking for you? 335 00:22:51,996 --> 00:22:54,205 Yeah. I have to go. 336 00:22:54,999 --> 00:22:57,417 -Okay. -Okay. 337 00:22:59,670 --> 00:23:03,131 -Bye. -Bye. I'll call you. 338 00:23:08,637 --> 00:23:12,974 -You think it was the muffin girl? -I guess. I don't know. 339 00:23:13,142 --> 00:23:14,809 Why do I even care? 340 00:23:15,770 --> 00:23:17,312 You like him! 341 00:23:17,521 --> 00:23:20,023 Oh, God. What if I'm pregnant? 342 00:23:20,191 --> 00:23:23,068 -Then it'll work out perfectly. -What do you mean? 343 00:23:23,277 --> 00:23:26,071 Because if you really like him, as soon as that happens... 344 00:23:26,238 --> 00:23:29,032 ...you'll break up with him, because you're pregnant. 345 00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:32,327 You won't have to put yourself out there, possibly get hurt. 346 00:23:32,495 --> 00:23:34,079 Hey, that's your dream. 347 00:23:34,246 --> 00:23:35,955 Be quiet. 348 00:23:36,123 --> 00:23:39,459 Besides, I'm not pregnant. 349 00:23:39,627 --> 00:23:41,795 And I'm okay on my own. 350 00:23:41,962 --> 00:23:43,463 Are you gonna see him again? 351 00:23:45,966 --> 00:23:48,134 Yeah, I think so. 352 00:24:00,356 --> 00:24:01,564 No. 353 00:24:04,902 --> 00:24:07,112 Not gonna happen, Nutsy. 354 00:24:11,826 --> 00:24:13,243 Hello. 355 00:24:13,786 --> 00:24:15,745 Oh, Stan. 356 00:24:36,142 --> 00:24:37,725 Go away. 357 00:24:43,023 --> 00:24:46,359 Stop it! You're making me nervous. 358 00:25:05,713 --> 00:25:08,047 You're early. I'll be a minute, okay? 359 00:25:09,758 --> 00:25:11,509 Three to five minutes, actually. 360 00:25:13,721 --> 00:25:17,348 -You want a beer? -Yeah, sure. You want one? 361 00:25:20,186 --> 00:25:21,477 -l'll let you know. -Okay. 362 00:25:22,855 --> 00:25:25,648 Oh, my God. Is he okay? 363 00:25:25,816 --> 00:25:29,110 He's fine. Happens all the time. 364 00:25:30,070 --> 00:25:31,571 Go. 365 00:25:33,490 --> 00:25:37,035 -I'm sorry. Can you give me a minute? -Yeah, yeah, yeah. 366 00:25:37,203 --> 00:25:38,870 Okay, good. 367 00:25:43,667 --> 00:25:45,126 Damn it, Nuts. 368 00:25:46,754 --> 00:25:49,714 Give me that. Give it to me. 369 00:25:49,882 --> 00:25:51,132 Let go. 370 00:25:52,635 --> 00:25:56,012 Let go right now! 371 00:25:56,180 --> 00:25:59,015 -Zoe, everything okay? -Yeah. 372 00:25:59,225 --> 00:26:01,768 You know, just showing him who's the pack leader. 373 00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:09,692 You idiot! 374 00:26:12,112 --> 00:26:14,948 You better not swallow that thing. Give it to me. Nutsy. 375 00:26:15,115 --> 00:26:17,492 Open. Open. 376 00:26:19,370 --> 00:26:21,704 -You look really pretty tonight. -Thank you. 377 00:26:21,872 --> 00:26:26,292 I mean, you always look really pretty, but tonight you look especially pretty. 378 00:26:26,794 --> 00:26:29,045 And that dress is-- 379 00:26:29,213 --> 00:26:30,546 It's really something. 380 00:26:30,798 --> 00:26:33,216 -Thank you. -You're welcome. 381 00:26:35,177 --> 00:26:38,096 Did you buy a new dress for our date tonight? 382 00:26:38,264 --> 00:26:41,015 -Don't flatter yourself. -l'll take that as a yes. 383 00:26:41,183 --> 00:26:44,519 -I guess you'll never know. -I guess not. 384 00:26:47,731 --> 00:26:50,984 -Except you left the price tag on. -What? 385 00:26:52,194 --> 00:26:53,569 Allow me. 386 00:26:55,781 --> 00:26:57,115 I got it. 387 00:27:09,670 --> 00:27:13,923 I've had this dress for a long time. It's just I haven't worn it yet... 388 00:27:14,091 --> 00:27:16,134 ...so that's why the tag was still on. 389 00:27:17,428 --> 00:27:18,928 You're not that special. 390 00:27:20,764 --> 00:27:21,931 Really? 391 00:27:49,126 --> 00:27:50,335 Look at this place. 392 00:27:51,128 --> 00:27:53,921 -I don't know what to say. -Finally. 393 00:27:54,089 --> 00:27:57,550 -What's that supposed to mean? -lt means good. Don't say anything. 394 00:27:57,718 --> 00:28:01,095 You don't have to say anything. Just come over here, sit down. 395 00:28:01,263 --> 00:28:04,140 -What, you think I talk too much? -I did not say that. 396 00:28:04,308 --> 00:28:06,559 -What did you say? -Just you're very quick. 397 00:28:06,727 --> 00:28:09,437 You always have a response for things, which I like. 398 00:28:09,605 --> 00:28:12,023 But tonight, just, you know, be surprised. 399 00:28:22,576 --> 00:28:23,659 Surprise. 400 00:28:26,997 --> 00:28:28,498 You're good. 401 00:28:28,665 --> 00:28:31,793 You worked for an Internet company? I don't see that at all. 402 00:28:31,960 --> 00:28:34,587 I was very important. You would've been impressed. 403 00:28:34,755 --> 00:28:37,423 Really? How did you get the pet store? 404 00:28:38,384 --> 00:28:40,343 Actually, it was through my dog, Nuts. 405 00:28:40,511 --> 00:28:43,012 I bought him at this fancy pet store near my house. 406 00:28:43,222 --> 00:28:46,933 Cutest puppy you have ever seen. Six months later, he almost dies. 407 00:28:47,101 --> 00:28:49,644 Turns out he was from one of those puppy mills... 408 00:28:49,812 --> 00:28:52,563 ...where dogs are so inbred, he was kind of falling apart. 409 00:28:52,731 --> 00:28:55,441 What did you do? Did you sue them? 410 00:28:55,609 --> 00:28:57,485 I thought about it. Then I thought: 411 00:28:57,653 --> 00:29:00,405 "What good would that do? They'll still sell inbred dogs." 412 00:29:00,572 --> 00:29:01,614 So I quit my job... 413 00:29:01,782 --> 00:29:05,034 ...and I took the stock-option money over to the pet store... 414 00:29:05,202 --> 00:29:07,078 ...and I bought it. 415 00:29:08,705 --> 00:29:11,707 I know how to milk a goat. Does that do anything for you? 416 00:29:13,419 --> 00:29:15,044 No, not really. 417 00:29:16,922 --> 00:29:19,257 Can I ask you a serious question, Zoe? 418 00:29:19,967 --> 00:29:21,467 What? 419 00:29:27,015 --> 00:29:29,517 Did you buy that dress to wear for me tonight? 420 00:29:43,991 --> 00:29:45,450 I will never tell. 421 00:29:47,453 --> 00:29:49,328 Really? Because... 422 00:29:52,583 --> 00:29:55,626 ...I have ways of making you talk. 423 00:30:07,806 --> 00:30:11,225 -Let me get that. Let me get that. -My dress! I got it. 424 00:30:11,435 --> 00:30:14,645 There's a hose over there behind the fence. 425 00:30:15,981 --> 00:30:19,400 You see it? Get the hose. 426 00:30:34,124 --> 00:30:37,043 -Okay, this is war. -What? No! 427 00:30:37,211 --> 00:30:39,754 Okay, hand it over. Hand it over! 428 00:30:47,513 --> 00:30:50,139 -lt was mean. -You weren't even pointing at the fire. 429 00:30:50,307 --> 00:30:52,683 -You just soaked me. -You were pointing at my face. 430 00:30:52,851 --> 00:30:55,019 But I wasn't trying to soak you. I swear! 431 00:30:55,187 --> 00:30:57,063 Oh, whatever! I looked into your eyes... 432 00:30:57,231 --> 00:31:00,149 ...and I saw you had this crazy look, like a crazy person. 433 00:31:00,317 --> 00:31:02,693 -That's not true. -lt is true. You know what else? 434 00:31:02,903 --> 00:31:07,698 I think I owe you another dress. And I definitely owe you another date. 435 00:31:09,201 --> 00:31:10,409 I'd like that. 436 00:31:11,203 --> 00:31:14,080 Why don't you come to the farm with me next weekend? 437 00:31:18,168 --> 00:31:19,835 I'll call you. 438 00:31:20,003 --> 00:31:21,379 I'll wait by the phone. 439 00:31:38,772 --> 00:31:39,981 What? 440 00:32:18,437 --> 00:32:20,396 Holy shit! 441 00:32:21,648 --> 00:32:23,816 -I know. -Are you sure? 442 00:32:23,984 --> 00:32:25,568 If I'm not, then my dog is. 443 00:32:25,736 --> 00:32:28,404 You're not making any sense. You're definitely pregnant. 444 00:32:29,114 --> 00:32:32,116 -Congratulations! How are we feeling? -We're freaking out! 445 00:32:32,284 --> 00:32:34,368 -What she said. -Why? 446 00:32:34,536 --> 00:32:36,704 We performed an inter-uterine insemination... 447 00:32:36,872 --> 00:32:38,831 ...using sperm that you purchased. 448 00:32:38,999 --> 00:32:41,292 This isn't exactly what we call an accident. 449 00:32:42,669 --> 00:32:45,671 It's just happening so fast. 450 00:32:45,839 --> 00:32:49,175 Keep breathing. Pump those arms. 451 00:32:49,343 --> 00:32:51,302 What did you all eat last night? 452 00:32:51,470 --> 00:32:54,055 -Hey, Arthur. -Well, hello, my dear. 453 00:32:54,222 --> 00:32:56,057 Oh, no, no, no, don't get up. It's okay. 454 00:32:56,224 --> 00:32:57,516 I can't get up. 455 00:32:57,684 --> 00:33:00,478 -Came to see my lovely fianc�e? -Yes. 456 00:33:00,687 --> 00:33:04,774 Oh, she's looking fine today, let me tell you. Just fine. 457 00:33:05,025 --> 00:33:06,400 -Hi, sweetheart. -Hey. 458 00:33:06,568 --> 00:33:08,903 -Baby. -Hey. I need to talk to you. 459 00:33:09,071 --> 00:33:11,489 -Sure. -Alone. 460 00:33:11,657 --> 00:33:13,115 Shirley. 461 00:33:13,283 --> 00:33:16,410 Don't worry about them. They can't hear anything anyway. 462 00:33:17,913 --> 00:33:24,168 -I'm pregnant. -What? 463 00:33:25,337 --> 00:33:27,338 -I'm pregnant. -I can't hear you, darling. 464 00:33:27,506 --> 00:33:31,634 Oh, Jesus, Judy! She's pregnant. Turn up your hearing aid. 465 00:33:35,514 --> 00:33:38,432 I'm confused. You said this is what you wanted. 466 00:33:39,935 --> 00:33:43,437 But this guy, he's special. And now the whole thing's gonna fall apart. 467 00:33:43,897 --> 00:33:45,773 What makes him so special? 468 00:33:45,941 --> 00:33:51,362 I don't know. He's very real. And funny. 469 00:33:52,322 --> 00:33:53,406 And different. 470 00:33:55,158 --> 00:33:56,992 I like him, Nana. 471 00:33:58,203 --> 00:33:59,412 What should I do? 472 00:34:01,081 --> 00:34:02,289 Zoe. 473 00:34:04,793 --> 00:34:08,045 You always get ahead of yourself. You barely know him. 474 00:34:08,213 --> 00:34:12,633 Spend some time with him. See what he's really like. 475 00:34:13,385 --> 00:34:17,263 He could be a total douche bag and then the whole thing is moot. 476 00:34:17,472 --> 00:34:20,391 Yeah. Yeah. 477 00:34:23,812 --> 00:34:26,230 -Maybe he is a douche bag. -Oh, come on. 478 00:34:26,440 --> 00:34:29,859 You think he'd ask you away for the weekend if he had a girlfriend? 479 00:34:30,026 --> 00:34:34,238 There's no way he's dating that muffin bitch, Zoe. Trust me. 480 00:34:34,406 --> 00:34:37,032 Who can say? Maybe he's looking to get laid. 481 00:34:37,200 --> 00:34:39,201 Oh, well, don't have sex with him, okay? 482 00:34:39,369 --> 00:34:41,787 That will really complicate things. 483 00:34:41,955 --> 00:34:43,330 -I know. -lt'll be hard... 484 00:34:43,498 --> 00:34:46,709 ...with three times the amount of blood coursing through your body. 485 00:34:46,877 --> 00:34:49,003 -Excuse me? -Oh, yeah. 486 00:34:49,421 --> 00:34:52,381 That's why pregnant women are so horny all the time. 487 00:34:52,549 --> 00:34:55,426 Is that what it is? I thought it was me. 488 00:34:55,635 --> 00:34:59,805 Oh, no. When I was pregnant, my whole body was so sensitive... 489 00:34:59,973 --> 00:35:02,016 ...I could have an orgasm sitting on a bus. 490 00:35:02,184 --> 00:35:04,685 -I think I'm gonna be sick. -Me too. 491 00:35:04,895 --> 00:35:07,021 Why? It's a happy story. 492 00:35:07,773 --> 00:35:10,775 -All right, I'm just gonna go up there... -Disgusting. 493 00:35:10,942 --> 00:35:14,320 ...and tell him that I'm pregnant. Just lay all my cards on the table. 494 00:35:14,488 --> 00:35:16,614 Okay, good. Just don't lay on the table. 495 00:35:16,782 --> 00:35:19,366 Okay? Because you cannot have sex. 496 00:35:42,182 --> 00:35:43,808 Don't look at me like that. 497 00:35:43,975 --> 00:35:46,227 I know. This is a big mess we're in. 498 00:35:46,978 --> 00:35:48,979 I'm gonna fix it. 499 00:35:53,693 --> 00:35:56,529 Shit. Here it is. 500 00:36:43,702 --> 00:36:45,703 Watch out for that tree. 501 00:36:46,288 --> 00:36:48,163 Yeah, thanks. 502 00:36:54,004 --> 00:36:55,921 -Hi. -Hi. 503 00:36:57,841 --> 00:37:00,259 The tree should not be there. All I'm gonna say. 504 00:37:00,468 --> 00:37:03,220 Whatever, Mrs. Magoo. 505 00:37:04,431 --> 00:37:06,348 -Come on. I'm glad you're here. -Okay. 506 00:37:07,934 --> 00:37:09,685 Me too. 507 00:37:10,103 --> 00:37:11,645 Stan. 508 00:37:12,856 --> 00:37:14,857 There's something I need to tell you. 509 00:37:17,360 --> 00:37:18,944 I'm pregnant. 510 00:37:21,489 --> 00:37:23,824 Yes, pregnant. 511 00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:32,583 Okay, maybe like: 512 00:37:35,420 --> 00:37:37,796 I'm gonna have a baby. 513 00:37:42,385 --> 00:37:44,261 I'm with child. 514 00:37:47,098 --> 00:37:49,350 Shit. 515 00:37:49,559 --> 00:37:50,601 Stan. 516 00:37:50,769 --> 00:37:52,811 Stan. Stan. 517 00:37:52,979 --> 00:37:55,314 I've been inseminated. 518 00:37:55,523 --> 00:37:58,984 Yes, inseminated. 519 00:38:00,195 --> 00:38:03,155 I'm gonna have a baby! 520 00:38:11,122 --> 00:38:12,539 Stan? 521 00:38:30,475 --> 00:38:32,893 Spoon, spoon. 522 00:39:04,759 --> 00:39:06,427 Would you like a plate? 523 00:39:11,349 --> 00:39:13,267 A napkin, trough? 524 00:39:15,812 --> 00:39:18,772 -These are for you. -That's so sweet. Thank you. 525 00:39:18,940 --> 00:39:19,982 You're welcome. 526 00:39:20,150 --> 00:39:21,525 You're good. 527 00:39:23,695 --> 00:39:25,070 Okay. 528 00:39:25,238 --> 00:39:27,656 It's just that stew was so delicious. 529 00:39:27,824 --> 00:39:29,533 I knew you'd like it. 530 00:39:29,701 --> 00:39:32,161 So, what's the next step for a cheese farmer? 531 00:39:32,328 --> 00:39:33,454 Very funny. 532 00:39:34,414 --> 00:39:37,666 I want to start a sustainable gourmet shop, okay? 533 00:39:37,834 --> 00:39:41,962 Cheese, wine, bread, prepared foods, but everything local. 534 00:39:42,130 --> 00:39:46,759 Nothing from farther than 30 miles. All based on the Farmers' Markets. 535 00:39:46,926 --> 00:39:48,927 -That's a good idea. -Thank you very much. 536 00:39:49,554 --> 00:39:53,015 I'm good at ideas. I'm just not good with follow-through. 537 00:39:53,183 --> 00:39:55,059 I wasn't good at marriage. 538 00:39:55,226 --> 00:39:57,895 I wasn't good at running a bed-and-breakfast. 539 00:39:58,063 --> 00:40:00,439 Thank God we didn't have kids. 540 00:40:01,357 --> 00:40:03,859 -You don't want kids? -I don't think so. 541 00:40:04,027 --> 00:40:05,486 Well, l don't know. 542 00:40:05,653 --> 00:40:09,740 For years, l never thought about the future. I just lived in the moment. 543 00:40:09,908 --> 00:40:12,117 But maybe I'm different now. 544 00:40:12,327 --> 00:40:17,206 I really want to take the next step. I really want to move on with my life. 545 00:40:17,373 --> 00:40:19,374 About the future. 546 00:40:20,293 --> 00:40:21,710 -Let's talk about that. -Okay. 547 00:40:21,878 --> 00:40:25,172 Because the future is now. 548 00:40:26,007 --> 00:40:27,925 -Right? -Right. 549 00:40:31,721 --> 00:40:33,972 There's something that I need to tell you. 550 00:40:34,390 --> 00:40:35,766 Hold that thought. 551 00:40:36,434 --> 00:40:38,227 Come here. 552 00:40:53,118 --> 00:40:55,327 -I want to show you something. -What is it? 553 00:40:55,495 --> 00:40:57,704 -lt's cheese. -I can see that. 554 00:40:57,872 --> 00:40:59,832 No, no, no, it's new. 555 00:40:59,999 --> 00:41:03,168 I had this idea to use these two different types of goat's milk... 556 00:41:03,336 --> 00:41:05,921 ...to come up with something really unique. 557 00:41:06,089 --> 00:41:08,590 It's sweet... 558 00:41:08,758 --> 00:41:11,593 ...and sassy and complex. 559 00:41:13,638 --> 00:41:15,472 I was inspired. 560 00:41:15,640 --> 00:41:19,351 So, what are you saying, I'm your cheese muse? 561 00:41:19,519 --> 00:41:20,978 Yeah. 562 00:41:32,782 --> 00:41:34,575 You're kind of hard to read right now. 563 00:41:37,954 --> 00:41:41,165 Well, l really want to kiss you... 564 00:41:41,833 --> 00:41:47,588 ...but it smells like cheese in here. 565 00:42:02,103 --> 00:42:05,647 We have to take it slow, okay? 566 00:42:06,191 --> 00:42:07,441 We can't have sex. 567 00:42:07,650 --> 00:42:11,236 -Fine. -Okay. Okay. 568 00:42:12,780 --> 00:42:18,202 Okay. 569 00:42:37,347 --> 00:42:38,388 Did you just--? 570 00:42:51,236 --> 00:42:53,320 Holy shit! 571 00:42:54,197 --> 00:42:57,199 Is my nose bleeding? You punched me. 572 00:42:57,367 --> 00:43:00,244 -I'm sorry. -No. It's okay. 573 00:43:00,411 --> 00:43:01,995 It was amazing. 574 00:43:02,163 --> 00:43:03,789 It was like over-the-top amazing. 575 00:43:03,957 --> 00:43:06,959 What was that, like three or four for you? 576 00:43:07,293 --> 00:43:10,212 Stan. Stan. 577 00:43:12,006 --> 00:43:14,758 There's something I have to tell you. 578 00:43:15,134 --> 00:43:16,510 Okay. 579 00:43:18,012 --> 00:43:19,513 What is it? 580 00:43:28,773 --> 00:43:30,607 Zoe? 581 00:43:36,489 --> 00:43:37,781 Why are you crying? 582 00:43:39,575 --> 00:43:40,784 I'm pregnant. 583 00:43:42,287 --> 00:43:44,663 I'm pretty sure it doesn't happen that fast. 584 00:43:44,831 --> 00:43:48,375 No, I know. It's hard to explain. 585 00:43:48,543 --> 00:43:50,210 What are you talking about? 586 00:43:56,217 --> 00:43:57,384 I'm pregnant. 587 00:44:07,312 --> 00:44:08,603 Who's the father? 588 00:44:10,106 --> 00:44:11,273 I don't know. 589 00:44:11,441 --> 00:44:14,443 I mean, I know who it is. I just don't know his name, exactly. 590 00:44:14,610 --> 00:44:16,111 It's a donor from a sperm bank. 591 00:44:16,279 --> 00:44:18,655 Seriously, what the hell are you talking about? 592 00:44:19,699 --> 00:44:23,827 -When did all this happen? -Actually, it was the day we met. 593 00:44:23,995 --> 00:44:26,872 Yeah, I didn't think to tell you... 594 00:44:27,040 --> 00:44:30,751 ...because I didn't think there was any way that I could be pregnant so fast. 595 00:44:30,918 --> 00:44:32,627 But why? 596 00:44:32,795 --> 00:44:34,421 Because I wanted a baby. 597 00:44:35,131 --> 00:44:38,467 I never met the right guy and I thought that if I waited any longer... 598 00:44:38,634 --> 00:44:40,427 ...I might miss my chance. 599 00:44:40,595 --> 00:44:42,095 All right, we just made love. 600 00:44:42,263 --> 00:44:44,931 You tell me you're pregnant with some stranger's child. 601 00:44:45,099 --> 00:44:47,726 Don't say it like that. You make it sound dirty. 602 00:44:47,894 --> 00:44:50,896 I wanted a baby and I thought I had to do it alone. 603 00:44:51,064 --> 00:44:54,358 -lt was before I met you. -I don't know what to say. 604 00:44:55,276 --> 00:44:56,526 What am I supposed to say: 605 00:44:56,694 --> 00:44:59,196 "Congratulations, this is terrific news"? 606 00:45:00,615 --> 00:45:03,492 I made this big decision to do this thing. 607 00:45:03,659 --> 00:45:05,035 And then I met you. 608 00:45:07,372 --> 00:45:09,373 -I'm sorry. -About what? 609 00:45:09,540 --> 00:45:11,666 Getting pregnant or lying to me about it? 610 00:45:11,834 --> 00:45:14,878 -I didn't lie. -You didn't tell the truth. 611 00:46:19,444 --> 00:46:22,028 -Where are you going? -I thought this would be easier. 612 00:46:22,196 --> 00:46:26,116 To just disappear at the crack of dawn? Don't I get a say? 613 00:46:26,284 --> 00:46:28,160 You said everything last night. 614 00:46:28,327 --> 00:46:29,786 No, I didn't. 615 00:46:29,954 --> 00:46:33,623 You left out the part that you had a girlfriend. That was pretty convenient. 616 00:46:33,791 --> 00:46:35,625 I don't have a girlfriend. 617 00:46:36,210 --> 00:46:38,086 That girl from the Farmers' Market. 618 00:46:38,713 --> 00:46:40,755 She's not my girlfriend. 619 00:46:40,923 --> 00:46:43,341 She was, but that was a few years ago. 620 00:46:48,431 --> 00:46:51,850 Olivia's in my class. We study together. 621 00:46:53,227 --> 00:46:54,311 Study what? 622 00:46:55,021 --> 00:46:58,482 I'm a student. I'm still in school. I go at night. 623 00:46:58,691 --> 00:47:02,861 -Why didn't you want to tell me? -Because it's embarrassing. 624 00:47:03,112 --> 00:47:07,616 You're this incredibly accomplished person and I didn't even finish college. 625 00:47:07,783 --> 00:47:10,494 I mean, I got this great life... 626 00:47:10,703 --> 00:47:14,039 ...but I'm barely passing economics. You know? 627 00:47:24,175 --> 00:47:27,010 -Where are you going? -Look, let's not drag this out, okay? 628 00:47:27,178 --> 00:47:29,471 I lied to you, you lied to me. 629 00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:31,264 We both have other plans... 630 00:47:31,432 --> 00:47:34,267 ...and being together is just messing everything up. 631 00:47:34,435 --> 00:47:38,980 We should just go our separate ways. Goodbye. 632 00:49:32,553 --> 00:49:33,803 So how did you two meet? 633 00:49:34,889 --> 00:49:38,058 We can talk later in your office or whatever. 634 00:49:38,476 --> 00:49:39,851 Okay. 635 00:49:40,019 --> 00:49:43,188 Well, everything seems right on track. 636 00:49:43,731 --> 00:49:45,857 A little blood. Quite normal. 637 00:49:46,067 --> 00:49:48,568 You don't have to stay in here if you don't want. 638 00:49:48,736 --> 00:49:50,403 I'm fine. I'm good. 639 00:49:50,571 --> 00:49:54,824 Now, I'm gonna do an ultrasound. This is how we view the foetus. 640 00:49:56,869 --> 00:49:58,578 Oh, you rub it on her stomach. 641 00:49:58,746 --> 00:50:00,914 I thought you were gonna put that huge thing-- 642 00:50:01,082 --> 00:50:02,123 In her vagina? 643 00:50:03,668 --> 00:50:07,128 It's too early to go through the abdomen, you see. 644 00:50:07,296 --> 00:50:09,339 So we have to go through the vagina. 645 00:50:09,507 --> 00:50:12,092 Vagina, vagina, vagina. 646 00:50:12,301 --> 00:50:16,638 Maybe if I say it often enough, you'll feel a little more comfortable. Vagina. 647 00:50:16,806 --> 00:50:18,473 -lt's not working. -Okay. 648 00:50:19,850 --> 00:50:22,227 Okay, now, Zoe. 649 00:50:22,853 --> 00:50:26,439 With a little bit of luck, we'll see a heartbeat. 650 00:50:28,275 --> 00:50:30,068 That's it? That little thing? 651 00:50:30,820 --> 00:50:34,197 -ls everything okay? -Everything is just.... 652 00:50:36,701 --> 00:50:38,201 What? 653 00:50:40,287 --> 00:50:41,996 I see another heartbeat. 654 00:50:42,289 --> 00:50:43,456 It has two hearts? 655 00:50:43,624 --> 00:50:45,792 No, but you have two babies. 656 00:51:02,685 --> 00:51:04,644 Are you gonna leave now? 657 00:51:04,812 --> 00:51:07,147 Because this is more than you bargained for. 658 00:51:07,314 --> 00:51:10,567 You know, it's more than I bargained for. 659 00:51:10,735 --> 00:51:14,195 But just tell me, okay? So I can be prepared. 660 00:51:14,363 --> 00:51:18,408 I just need to sit here, you know? 661 00:51:19,118 --> 00:51:20,660 -Okay. -Okay. 662 00:51:24,874 --> 00:51:27,917 -But then are you gonna leave? -Okay, one kid is a lot. 663 00:51:28,419 --> 00:51:29,878 Two kids is a posse. 664 00:51:30,588 --> 00:51:32,464 I'm just getting used to us as a couple. 665 00:51:32,631 --> 00:51:34,799 And now all of a sudden you're having a posse. 666 00:51:35,593 --> 00:51:37,093 Are you ready for a posse? 667 00:52:02,411 --> 00:52:04,829 I don't even know if I like kids. 668 00:52:05,706 --> 00:52:08,708 Hey, beat it, pal. All right? 669 00:52:08,876 --> 00:52:10,668 Look, I don't want to cause a scene... 670 00:52:10,836 --> 00:52:12,921 ...but get your hands out of your pockets... 671 00:52:13,088 --> 00:52:14,756 ...and get the hell out of here. 672 00:52:14,924 --> 00:52:17,717 No, I'm talking to you, because you're the only pervert... 673 00:52:17,885 --> 00:52:20,220 ...with his hands in his pockets at a playground. 674 00:52:20,387 --> 00:52:23,223 -I'm not a pervert! -If you don't have kids, get lost. 675 00:52:23,390 --> 00:52:24,682 I have kids, okay? 676 00:52:24,892 --> 00:52:27,185 A week ago, I didn't even know she was pregnant... 677 00:52:27,353 --> 00:52:28,561 ...and now she's having twins. 678 00:52:28,729 --> 00:52:33,107 I just saw the ultrasound. The one that goes inside. 679 00:52:34,485 --> 00:52:36,319 I know what you need. 680 00:52:38,072 --> 00:52:39,155 How did this happen? 681 00:52:51,293 --> 00:52:52,794 -Just take that off. -This here? 682 00:52:52,962 --> 00:52:54,754 -Yeah. -Oh, man, I'm dizzy. 683 00:52:54,922 --> 00:52:57,048 I'm sweaty and dizzy. 684 00:52:58,300 --> 00:53:01,344 -That's normal, bro. -ls it? Which one's yours? 685 00:53:02,763 --> 00:53:03,888 -l've got three. -Three? 686 00:53:04,056 --> 00:53:08,059 Yeah, look. That's Charlie right there, and that's Roxy. 687 00:53:08,227 --> 00:53:09,561 -See that fellow? -Yeah. 688 00:53:09,728 --> 00:53:11,271 That's Mack. 689 00:53:12,648 --> 00:53:14,482 He's eating sand. 690 00:53:14,650 --> 00:53:17,610 Yeah. By the time you get to the third one... 691 00:53:17,778 --> 00:53:19,863 ...you don't worry so much about that stuff. 692 00:53:21,156 --> 00:53:23,741 What's it like, the whole kid thing? 693 00:53:23,909 --> 00:53:25,702 It's great! 694 00:53:28,789 --> 00:53:32,792 Except for the lack of sleep, free time... 695 00:53:32,960 --> 00:53:35,044 ...sex with my wife... 696 00:53:35,212 --> 00:53:37,171 ...buck-naked Fridays in the family room. 697 00:53:37,339 --> 00:53:40,300 That's not the answer I was looking for, man. lt's fine. 698 00:53:42,720 --> 00:53:45,305 The best way I can describe it is... 699 00:53:45,472 --> 00:53:48,808 ...it's awful, awful, awful... 700 00:53:49,852 --> 00:53:53,563 ...and then something incredible happens. 701 00:53:54,899 --> 00:54:00,987 And then awful, awful, awful. 702 00:54:01,530 --> 00:54:03,573 Then something incredible happens again. 703 00:54:03,782 --> 00:54:08,494 It's like this all day, every day, man. I feel like I'm drowning... 704 00:54:08,662 --> 00:54:12,040 ...like I'm gasping to get my old life back. 705 00:54:12,207 --> 00:54:14,876 And then a small moment happens... 706 00:54:16,629 --> 00:54:17,837 ...that's so magical... 707 00:54:18,547 --> 00:54:22,759 ...so life-affirming that it makes it all worthwhile. 708 00:54:23,969 --> 00:54:25,845 This will be the best thing you ever do. 709 00:54:26,180 --> 00:54:28,014 Dada! 710 00:54:29,975 --> 00:54:31,559 Hey, son. 711 00:54:32,311 --> 00:54:34,520 I guess this would be that moment, huh? 712 00:54:34,730 --> 00:54:36,439 Yeah, this would be it. 713 00:54:36,607 --> 00:54:38,608 Hey, what do you have there, son? 714 00:54:39,276 --> 00:54:41,027 Poo-poo. 715 00:54:44,323 --> 00:54:46,366 Well, almost. 716 00:54:47,743 --> 00:54:49,327 Son, is that cat shit? 717 00:54:49,495 --> 00:54:51,329 No. 718 00:54:51,622 --> 00:54:53,498 -That's your shit? -No. 719 00:54:56,293 --> 00:54:58,044 This ain't even his shit. 720 00:54:59,797 --> 00:55:02,423 Charlie, Roxy, meet me at the bathroom. 721 00:55:02,591 --> 00:55:05,426 What did I tell you about playing with other people's shit? 722 00:55:06,095 --> 00:55:08,012 So why are you upset? 723 00:55:08,347 --> 00:55:09,764 It's so lucky. 724 00:55:09,932 --> 00:55:12,976 To get pregnant on the first try with frozen sperm is rare... 725 00:55:13,143 --> 00:55:16,646 ...but to get pregnant with twins? I mean, come on, that is unheard of. 726 00:55:17,439 --> 00:55:20,358 Okay, okay. When you want to speak, you can. 727 00:55:20,526 --> 00:55:23,236 Does anyone else have anything in the meantime... 728 00:55:23,404 --> 00:55:24,904 ...that they'd like to share? 729 00:55:25,114 --> 00:55:26,990 -Tabitha. -Yeah, I'm having a hard time. 730 00:55:27,157 --> 00:55:29,909 Luca keeps asking me why his friends have two parents... 731 00:55:30,077 --> 00:55:31,202 ...and he only has one. 732 00:55:31,370 --> 00:55:33,871 I knew this would happen someday. I wasn't prepared-- 733 00:55:34,039 --> 00:55:35,206 -There's this guy. -What? 734 00:55:35,374 --> 00:55:37,458 His name is Stan, and he's fantastic. 735 00:55:37,626 --> 00:55:38,751 Wasn't I just speaking? 736 00:55:38,919 --> 00:55:40,837 You know how you never meet somebody? 737 00:55:41,005 --> 00:55:44,090 The kind of guy who makes you rethink everything. 738 00:55:44,258 --> 00:55:46,217 Like, maybe I can be a stay-at-home mom. 739 00:55:46,385 --> 00:55:48,845 Maybe I can. I'll love being barefoot and pregnant. 740 00:55:49,013 --> 00:55:51,931 He can teach me how to make cheese. We can live off the land. 741 00:55:52,099 --> 00:55:56,269 Zoe, this group is called Single Mothers and Proud. 742 00:55:56,812 --> 00:55:57,979 I know. 743 00:55:58,522 --> 00:56:01,274 I know, I know. I'm sorry. 744 00:56:01,692 --> 00:56:03,818 I wasn't planning to meet anybody. 745 00:56:03,986 --> 00:56:06,195 It just happened. 746 00:56:06,363 --> 00:56:08,990 And now that I've thrown all my plans out the window... 747 00:56:09,158 --> 00:56:12,994 ...and really fallen for this guy... 748 00:56:14,663 --> 00:56:17,373 ...I'm just afraid that he might not stay. 749 00:56:19,460 --> 00:56:21,210 What should I do? 750 00:56:25,507 --> 00:56:26,841 I don't know. 751 00:56:27,468 --> 00:56:31,971 This is wildly outside my field of expertise. 752 00:56:32,139 --> 00:56:35,767 Yeah, because we're a single mothers group. 753 00:56:36,226 --> 00:56:40,021 So we don't tend to give advice on how to get your boyfriend to commit. 754 00:56:40,189 --> 00:56:41,230 Not usually. 755 00:56:41,398 --> 00:56:44,108 Maybe you should join a different group. 756 00:56:44,693 --> 00:56:45,735 -Ding-dong. -No. 757 00:56:45,903 --> 00:56:49,197 Okay. We are gonna have to take a vote on this, Zoe... 758 00:56:49,364 --> 00:56:52,033 ...because I think we, collectively, feel... 759 00:56:52,201 --> 00:56:53,993 ...that you are in a very... 760 00:56:54,495 --> 00:56:58,206 ...wildly different place than where we are. 761 00:56:58,373 --> 00:57:00,958 So we are going to take a vote. 762 00:57:02,252 --> 00:57:03,711 Okay. 763 00:57:13,180 --> 00:57:14,597 Taxi! 764 00:57:25,984 --> 00:57:27,235 Hi. 765 00:57:28,695 --> 00:57:30,029 How did you find me? 766 00:57:30,197 --> 00:57:32,365 I called the store. Said it was an emergency. 767 00:57:32,533 --> 00:57:34,117 What is it? 768 00:57:38,914 --> 00:57:40,456 You're crazy. 769 00:57:42,126 --> 00:57:43,918 I don't expect you to stay. 770 00:57:44,128 --> 00:57:46,796 I don't expect you to expect me to stay. 771 00:57:47,381 --> 00:57:49,006 What if I want to stay? 772 00:57:49,424 --> 00:57:51,717 Well, then I'd be surprised. 773 00:57:53,220 --> 00:57:54,428 And happy. 774 00:57:55,806 --> 00:57:58,266 -I can't promise anything. -Neither can I. 775 00:57:58,433 --> 00:58:00,184 Okay. 776 00:58:02,896 --> 00:58:04,981 Okay, fine. Give me the hot dog. 777 00:58:13,782 --> 00:58:14,824 Perry and Hudson. 778 00:58:14,992 --> 00:58:17,326 -Feel free to run every red light. -You got it. 779 00:58:19,163 --> 00:58:21,747 -Here we go. -Here we go. 780 00:58:27,754 --> 00:58:29,839 This sucks! 781 00:58:30,007 --> 00:58:32,967 Nothing fits me! Please, just let me wear sweats. 782 00:58:33,135 --> 00:58:35,803 Honey, you can't wear sweats. This is important. 783 00:58:35,971 --> 00:58:38,097 -l'll get that. -Wait, let me suck it in. 784 00:58:42,102 --> 00:58:44,228 Have you got a jacket or something? 785 00:58:52,362 --> 00:58:55,239 -Got you. I got you. Are you all right? -Yes. 786 00:58:58,994 --> 00:59:00,578 I can't. 787 00:59:05,876 --> 00:59:07,335 Oh, watch it. 788 00:59:14,885 --> 00:59:17,011 -I'm gonna throw up. -What? 789 00:59:19,556 --> 00:59:21,182 -Good to see you. -How are you? 790 00:59:21,350 --> 00:59:24,936 Stan. Oh, you are a prince. Thanks for coming. 791 00:59:25,520 --> 00:59:26,979 Sea urchins? 792 00:59:29,149 --> 00:59:30,524 Excuse me. 793 00:59:40,827 --> 00:59:42,203 -Hi. -Hi. 794 00:59:48,502 --> 00:59:52,255 I split my dress. And I didn't want to go. How about that? 795 01:00:15,904 --> 01:00:17,029 What is that thing? 796 01:00:17,197 --> 01:00:19,824 Oh, Mona gave it to me. It's supposed to help me sleep. 797 01:00:21,743 --> 01:00:22,994 Okay. 798 01:00:27,374 --> 01:00:29,292 -Hold on. -Okay. 799 01:00:48,020 --> 01:00:49,520 Zoe? 800 01:00:53,775 --> 01:00:55,026 It's been two weeks now... 801 01:00:55,193 --> 01:00:57,987 ...and all she ever wants to do is sleep with that pillow. 802 01:00:58,155 --> 01:01:00,323 The pillow is a bitch. Totally replacing you? 803 01:01:00,490 --> 01:01:03,826 -Completely. She drags it everywhere. -My wife, she drew eyes on hers. 804 01:01:03,994 --> 01:01:06,037 I make a move in the middle of the night... 805 01:01:06,204 --> 01:01:08,039 -...the pillow is staring at me. -Yeah. 806 01:01:08,206 --> 01:01:11,751 -Like, "Bro, l don't think so." -We used to have sex all the time. 807 01:01:11,918 --> 01:01:14,754 Every day. Now I can't touch her. I can barely go near her. 808 01:01:14,921 --> 01:01:16,380 She's pregnant. You can't win. 809 01:01:16,548 --> 01:01:18,924 -The only one who wins is the pillow! -The pillow! 810 01:01:19,092 --> 01:01:22,636 -Screw that pillow, man. -You might have to. I did once. 811 01:01:24,639 --> 01:01:26,724 We're gonna be fine. 812 01:01:26,892 --> 01:01:29,518 Gonna get through this. Everything's gonna be fine. 813 01:01:29,686 --> 01:01:32,688 In a year's time, this is just gonna be a funny memory, right? 814 01:01:32,856 --> 01:01:35,858 That's right. Before you know it, the kids will be in school... 815 01:01:36,026 --> 01:01:39,987 ...and you'll long for the days when a pillow was your biggest problem. 816 01:01:41,239 --> 01:01:43,407 Must be hard when they first go off to school. 817 01:01:43,575 --> 01:01:45,368 Little school shoes, little backpacks. 818 01:01:45,535 --> 01:01:47,745 No, saying goodbye to the kid is easy. 819 01:01:47,913 --> 01:01:50,706 Saying goodbye to 20 grand, now, that's hard. 820 01:01:50,874 --> 01:01:53,584 What are you talking about? What's 20 grand? 821 01:01:54,086 --> 01:01:56,337 And you have twins. 822 01:01:57,297 --> 01:01:58,798 Double-whammy. 823 01:01:59,883 --> 01:02:02,968 That's a whole lot of Parmesan. 824 01:02:03,136 --> 01:02:04,303 Parmesan. 825 01:02:07,808 --> 01:02:10,017 Oh, my God. 826 01:02:10,185 --> 01:02:13,187 All right, this one says, "most natural nipple." 827 01:02:13,563 --> 01:02:16,023 That looks nothing like my nipples, Nana. 828 01:02:16,191 --> 01:02:18,192 This one says, "BPA free." 829 01:02:18,360 --> 01:02:21,112 -What's BPA? -I don't know. 830 01:02:21,279 --> 01:02:23,030 So how do you know you don't want it? 831 01:02:23,198 --> 01:02:25,908 It's Bisphenol A, and you do not want it. 832 01:02:26,076 --> 01:02:28,786 If you're gonna use a bottle, which we do not advocate... 833 01:02:28,954 --> 01:02:31,163 -...because breast is best... -Better. 834 01:02:31,331 --> 01:02:32,498 ...use a glass bottle. 835 01:02:33,125 --> 01:02:35,835 -How are you, honey? -I'm good. 836 01:02:36,753 --> 01:02:38,379 We missed you at the meetings. 837 01:02:38,547 --> 01:02:40,965 Okay, yes. 838 01:02:41,633 --> 01:02:46,220 I never heard back after the vote, so I just assumed that I was out. 839 01:02:46,430 --> 01:02:51,434 Oh, no, it was unanimous. Didn't anyone call you? 840 01:02:51,935 --> 01:02:53,310 No? 841 01:02:54,438 --> 01:02:55,896 -Okay. -Okay. 842 01:02:56,064 --> 01:02:59,358 Well, this is my Nana, and this is Arthur, her fianc�. 843 01:02:59,526 --> 01:03:00,734 -Hello. -Nice to meet you. 844 01:03:00,902 --> 01:03:03,028 -How you doing? -When are you getting married? 845 01:03:03,196 --> 01:03:06,991 She's kept me waiting for 22 years, so I'm not holding my breath. 846 01:03:07,159 --> 01:03:10,953 Zoe, can l put you on the phone tree? 847 01:03:11,121 --> 01:03:13,873 I kind of want the whole group there when it happens. 848 01:03:15,125 --> 01:03:17,126 Thanks. That means a lot. 849 01:03:17,294 --> 01:03:19,044 Okay. Well, happy shopping. 850 01:03:19,212 --> 01:03:22,590 And check out the strollers on aisle six, because they're awesome. 851 01:03:22,757 --> 01:03:24,091 -Did you not call her? -Okay. 852 01:03:24,259 --> 01:03:25,676 -I don't know. -Okay. 853 01:03:41,318 --> 01:03:44,695 Stan! 854 01:03:44,863 --> 01:03:46,655 -Lookie! -Zoe? 855 01:03:47,824 --> 01:03:49,283 -Hey. -What is that? 856 01:03:49,451 --> 01:03:53,829 It's a Twin X Deluxe, the Rolls-Royce of strollers. Isn't it awesome? 857 01:03:53,997 --> 01:03:55,247 It's big. 858 01:03:55,415 --> 01:03:57,208 Supposed to fit through most doorways. 859 01:03:57,375 --> 01:04:00,586 I don't think so. Just let me get it sideways. 860 01:04:02,380 --> 01:04:04,548 -Keep trying. -lt's gotta have a thing here. 861 01:04:06,593 --> 01:04:08,135 Hang on. 862 01:04:08,970 --> 01:04:10,095 Oh, shit! 863 01:04:10,263 --> 01:04:12,223 -Are you okay? -lt bit me. 864 01:04:15,602 --> 01:04:17,144 What the hell is going on here? 865 01:04:17,354 --> 01:04:20,022 An outfit to bring the babies home in from the hospital. 866 01:04:20,190 --> 01:04:21,815 How many babies are you having? 867 01:04:22,025 --> 01:04:25,528 I just got two of everything. Look, baby Village People. 868 01:04:26,363 --> 01:04:29,448 How much money did you spend? Where are we gonna put all this? 869 01:04:29,616 --> 01:04:32,618 -Don't worry. It'll be okay. -I don't see how that's possible. 870 01:04:32,786 --> 01:04:35,287 Haven't even had the babies and everything's changed. 871 01:04:36,623 --> 01:04:39,625 You know what? There's the door. If you want to go, you can go. 872 01:04:39,793 --> 01:04:42,169 Stop it. I hate it when you do that. 873 01:04:47,425 --> 01:04:49,760 I know. I'm sorry. 874 01:04:55,183 --> 01:04:56,725 Let me see. 875 01:05:00,855 --> 01:05:02,439 Sorry. 876 01:05:10,824 --> 01:05:13,617 Have you gotten to page 279 yet? 877 01:05:14,244 --> 01:05:17,037 No, I stopped reading when you tore out one of my pages... 878 01:05:17,205 --> 01:05:19,248 ...and used it as a napkin. 879 01:05:19,833 --> 01:05:22,710 Well, it says here that women in their third trimester... 880 01:05:22,877 --> 01:05:24,628 ...experience hormonal mood swings... 881 01:05:24,796 --> 01:05:29,216 ...and their partners just have to be extra understanding about it. 882 01:05:31,303 --> 01:05:34,263 Are you coming on to me right now? It's kind of hard to tell. 883 01:05:46,151 --> 01:05:49,153 -What? -You have chicken in your hair. 884 01:05:49,321 --> 01:05:51,155 -I do? -Right there, yeah. 885 01:05:51,656 --> 01:05:53,282 Did I get it? 886 01:05:58,413 --> 01:06:00,414 You know what, honey? 887 01:06:03,043 --> 01:06:07,421 I'm sorry, but not tonight, okay? Okay? 888 01:06:10,800 --> 01:06:12,134 Okay. 889 01:06:25,523 --> 01:06:27,900 -Sorry. -That's okay. 890 01:06:58,723 --> 01:07:01,100 Hey, babe. Hey. You want some breakfast? 891 01:07:02,727 --> 01:07:04,395 No, thank you. 892 01:07:05,313 --> 01:07:07,773 It's still nighttime. Are you okay? 893 01:07:07,982 --> 01:07:10,943 Yeah, I'm good. I'm good. Do you know how much preschool is? 894 01:07:11,111 --> 01:07:13,737 Twenty grand. For circle time. 895 01:07:13,905 --> 01:07:17,282 What about college? I think colleges run about 50 grand right now. 896 01:07:17,450 --> 01:07:20,786 But that's right now, so in 1 8 years, it'll be double that, at least. 897 01:07:20,954 --> 01:07:22,830 And we have twins, so double it again. 898 01:07:23,331 --> 01:07:25,874 So, what's that, like 200 grand a year? 899 01:07:26,042 --> 01:07:28,669 We haven't even bought books or clothes or shit. 900 01:07:29,546 --> 01:07:31,922 They're probably gonna need cars at school. 901 01:07:32,090 --> 01:07:35,509 You know I'm gonna be a pushover and buy them whatever they want. 902 01:07:35,677 --> 01:07:38,387 So, what's that, like half a million a year? 903 01:07:38,847 --> 01:07:42,099 I don't have half a million a year. I'm in night school. 904 01:07:42,308 --> 01:07:45,018 Just something I was thinking about. It's no big deal. 905 01:07:49,983 --> 01:07:52,317 Why don't you come back to bed, honey? 906 01:07:52,902 --> 01:07:54,570 Okay. 907 01:08:08,376 --> 01:08:10,961 -Did I wake you up? -No. 908 01:08:18,094 --> 01:08:20,304 We're gonna be okay. 909 01:08:20,472 --> 01:08:22,431 I have money saved. 910 01:08:25,351 --> 01:08:27,519 It's not just about the money. 911 01:08:28,938 --> 01:08:31,607 I'll figure out a way to make enough money. 912 01:08:31,775 --> 01:08:33,400 What is it, then? 913 01:08:35,945 --> 01:08:37,446 It's just-- 914 01:08:38,740 --> 01:08:40,657 I need to know. 915 01:08:42,619 --> 01:08:44,828 Are you still in there? 916 01:08:50,627 --> 01:08:52,795 I'm still here. 917 01:10:00,989 --> 01:10:04,491 Excuse me. Can I help you? 918 01:10:04,659 --> 01:10:06,451 What do you think? 919 01:10:12,166 --> 01:10:13,959 It's a bit overwhelming, huh? 920 01:10:14,127 --> 01:10:17,504 There are so many, and they're so big. 921 01:10:17,672 --> 01:10:20,132 Well, they have to be big. Two babies, right? 922 01:10:20,300 --> 01:10:23,677 Yeah, but babies are small. 923 01:10:25,221 --> 01:10:28,056 These are for, like, giant mutant babies. 924 01:10:28,224 --> 01:10:33,020 You should see some of the babies that come in here. Total fat-asses. 925 01:10:34,063 --> 01:10:38,734 By the way, my boyfriend and I do custom work. 926 01:10:39,819 --> 01:10:42,029 We can solve this. 927 01:11:23,738 --> 01:11:25,197 Zoe? 928 01:11:27,951 --> 01:11:29,785 What are you doing? 929 01:11:29,953 --> 01:11:32,704 Nothing. How was your exam? 930 01:11:32,872 --> 01:11:34,790 Shitty. Come on, what were you doing? 931 01:11:35,625 --> 01:11:37,167 Nothing. 932 01:11:40,129 --> 01:11:42,047 I gained three more pounds this week. 933 01:11:42,215 --> 01:11:44,091 And I think it went all to my ass. 934 01:11:44,300 --> 01:11:48,679 You look great. You always look great. I missed you today. 935 01:11:48,846 --> 01:11:50,555 I miss my old ass. 936 01:11:50,723 --> 01:11:53,642 You know what's weird? I never knew your old ass. 937 01:11:53,851 --> 01:11:56,728 It was kind of like this ass, but way hotter. 938 01:12:07,365 --> 01:12:08,532 -Baby. -Yeah? 939 01:12:08,700 --> 01:12:10,033 This is my old ass. 940 01:12:14,080 --> 01:12:15,539 What? 941 01:12:19,877 --> 01:12:21,753 Why do you have a picture of your ass? 942 01:12:21,921 --> 01:12:23,964 My college boyfriend took it. 943 01:12:24,674 --> 01:12:27,592 So in all fairness, it doesn't look exactly like that... 944 01:12:28,219 --> 01:12:30,679 ...but it's pretty close. It's held up. 945 01:12:30,847 --> 01:12:33,098 Yeah, it's a nice ass. 946 01:12:34,517 --> 01:12:37,269 Look, this is me in the seventh grade. 947 01:12:39,313 --> 01:12:42,024 This is me and Nana at my confirmation. 948 01:12:47,447 --> 01:12:49,865 This is the last picture I have of my mom. 949 01:12:50,908 --> 01:12:53,618 She lived for a few more years after this. 950 01:12:53,828 --> 01:12:55,370 But we didn't take any pictures. 951 01:12:55,538 --> 01:12:57,831 She didn't want us to remember her that way. 952 01:12:58,708 --> 01:13:01,293 I was 8 years old when she died. 953 01:13:03,629 --> 01:13:05,547 I can't imagine. 954 01:13:08,426 --> 01:13:11,678 She had this great laugh. And really soft hands. 955 01:13:12,346 --> 01:13:15,515 She used to rub my back before I went to sleep. 956 01:13:18,519 --> 01:13:22,064 It's such a small thing, but I think about it all the time. 957 01:13:28,905 --> 01:13:31,740 Why don't you ever talk about your dad? 958 01:13:33,868 --> 01:13:37,037 She was in a coma for two years after this. 959 01:13:37,205 --> 01:13:39,748 He didn't stick around. 960 01:13:39,916 --> 01:13:42,209 Oh, God, Zoe. 961 01:13:43,252 --> 01:13:44,836 I'm so sorry. 962 01:13:45,004 --> 01:13:46,129 It's no big deal. 963 01:13:47,423 --> 01:13:49,549 It was an important lesson for me. 964 01:13:49,717 --> 01:13:52,385 That's when I realised that nothing lasts forever. 965 01:13:55,515 --> 01:13:57,682 So now you know everything. 966 01:14:03,815 --> 01:14:05,899 Some things can last forever. 967 01:14:07,693 --> 01:14:09,444 Maybe. 968 01:14:11,531 --> 01:14:13,824 About my exam. 969 01:14:15,076 --> 01:14:17,327 I didn't exactly-- 970 01:14:18,621 --> 01:14:20,580 That's weird. 971 01:14:26,879 --> 01:14:30,048 I'm confused. Why'd you say you'd come in the first place? 972 01:14:30,216 --> 01:14:32,676 It seemed like a good idea at the time. 973 01:14:33,553 --> 01:14:34,761 -ls that Zoe? -Zoe! 974 01:14:35,179 --> 01:14:37,722 -Hey. -lt is so nice of you to come. 975 01:14:37,890 --> 01:14:39,057 Hi. 976 01:14:39,225 --> 01:14:42,894 Yeah, we just wanted to stop by and say a quick "hi" and good luck. 977 01:14:43,062 --> 01:14:46,690 No, you're staying. You have to stay. Lori wants us all here for this. 978 01:14:47,108 --> 01:14:49,860 I really want to stay. 979 01:14:51,779 --> 01:14:53,864 She's having a contraction. 980 01:15:04,542 --> 01:15:07,127 Okay. So, what were you saying? 981 01:15:08,880 --> 01:15:09,921 This is Stan. 982 01:15:10,089 --> 01:15:13,175 -Of course. -Hi. Hi. 983 01:15:13,342 --> 01:15:15,802 -Congratulations. -Thank you. 984 01:15:15,970 --> 01:15:17,888 Hey, you two should get in here. 985 01:15:18,055 --> 01:15:19,973 No, this is your special moment... 986 01:15:20,141 --> 01:15:22,434 -...and we should go. -No. Oh, God, I'm not shy. 987 01:15:22,602 --> 01:15:24,394 Come on, I've been through it before. 988 01:15:24,562 --> 01:15:27,606 I am not shy. It is really quite beautiful. 989 01:15:37,491 --> 01:15:40,160 How long do we have to stay here? 990 01:15:40,328 --> 01:15:44,080 -Just wait till it starts. We'll sneak out. -Okay. 991 01:15:48,085 --> 01:15:51,171 Come on, everyone. lt's happening. 992 01:15:51,339 --> 01:15:55,258 Come on. She's about to get into the water. 993 01:15:57,553 --> 01:15:59,095 The what? 994 01:16:03,476 --> 01:16:06,269 I'm gonna be out here, okay? 995 01:16:09,565 --> 01:16:12,359 Just relax. Breathe. 996 01:16:17,031 --> 01:16:18,365 I know. Isn't it amazing... 997 01:16:18,532 --> 01:16:21,368 ...how the human body can just open up like that? 998 01:16:24,872 --> 01:16:27,582 I'm gonna go get a little air. I'm feeling a little-- 999 01:16:27,750 --> 01:16:30,210 No, Zoe. Don't you move, Zoe. 1000 01:16:30,378 --> 01:16:31,670 You're my focal point. 1001 01:16:31,837 --> 01:16:34,965 -What? -Oh, God. 1002 01:16:35,132 --> 01:16:36,800 Push, Lori. Push. 1003 01:16:38,886 --> 01:16:40,679 Holy shit! 1004 01:16:42,640 --> 01:16:44,557 You can't leave. You're her focal point. 1005 01:16:44,725 --> 01:16:46,059 Can't she use somebody else? 1006 01:16:46,227 --> 01:16:48,687 She's in labour. You can't argue with her now. 1007 01:16:48,896 --> 01:16:51,273 Someone grab her legs. Lift them up. Lift them up. 1008 01:16:51,482 --> 01:16:54,818 -Push. That's it, push. -Breathe. 1009 01:16:58,030 --> 01:17:00,156 Jesus, what is that? 1010 01:17:00,324 --> 01:17:03,827 Perfectly natural. Sometimes the bowels just release. 1011 01:17:03,995 --> 01:17:07,455 -Ridley, if you could. -Okay, okay, Lori. 1012 01:17:09,709 --> 01:17:13,128 No, Zoe! Don't you move! You are my focal point. 1013 01:17:13,296 --> 01:17:15,130 What does that even mean? 1014 01:17:15,298 --> 01:17:17,841 I need to turn over! I need to turn over, please! 1015 01:17:18,009 --> 01:17:21,011 -We are here for you, sister! -I need to turn over. 1016 01:17:24,265 --> 01:17:26,933 We are all pushing with you! 1017 01:17:32,398 --> 01:17:33,940 Here comes the head! 1018 01:17:34,483 --> 01:17:38,236 -Get me a mirror! I want to see it! -No! You don't! 1019 01:17:38,404 --> 01:17:41,489 -Goddamn it, Zoe, don't move! -I thought you wanted a mirror. 1020 01:17:41,657 --> 01:17:43,074 Stan, the mirror! 1021 01:17:43,784 --> 01:17:45,118 -What? -The mirror! 1022 01:17:45,536 --> 01:17:46,661 What mirror? 1023 01:17:46,829 --> 01:17:48,913 -Get the mirror! For the love of God! -Stan! 1024 01:17:49,123 --> 01:17:51,458 -Stan, get the mirror! -Get the mirror! 1025 01:17:57,214 --> 01:18:00,592 -Hi, I'm Stan. I'm sorry. -Give me the mirror. Nobody cares. 1026 01:18:00,801 --> 01:18:03,762 -Okay. -No. No. 1027 01:18:03,929 --> 01:18:07,515 -Look at all that hair. -That's not the baby's hair. 1028 01:18:08,059 --> 01:18:10,935 One last push! 1029 01:18:35,169 --> 01:18:37,837 Everyone says it's so beautiful. 1030 01:18:39,256 --> 01:18:41,633 I thought it was terrifying. 1031 01:18:42,468 --> 01:18:44,552 I don't ever want to see that again. 1032 01:18:46,806 --> 01:18:49,015 But you want to see ours, right? 1033 01:18:50,601 --> 01:18:53,269 I don't know, baby. It was just-- 1034 01:18:53,437 --> 01:18:55,230 I shouldn't have seen that. 1035 01:19:02,947 --> 01:19:05,990 Hey, I was just coming by to see if you were okay. 1036 01:19:06,158 --> 01:19:08,410 I was worried about you after the exam. 1037 01:19:08,577 --> 01:19:11,871 -What happened with your exam? -I was trying to tell you last night. 1038 01:19:16,585 --> 01:19:19,671 -What happened? -I walked out of the exam. 1039 01:19:19,839 --> 01:19:22,048 -Why? -I'm quitting school. 1040 01:19:22,216 --> 01:19:25,176 I can't believe you're pregnant. 1041 01:19:25,678 --> 01:19:27,011 Why are you quitting school? 1042 01:19:27,179 --> 01:19:29,806 Because if l stay in school, I can only work part-time. 1043 01:19:29,974 --> 01:19:33,101 If I work part-time, I can't afford our expenses. I need to work. 1044 01:19:33,269 --> 01:19:36,521 I had no idea it was this serious. You're having a baby? 1045 01:19:36,689 --> 01:19:38,773 I didn't know you'd been together that long. 1046 01:19:38,941 --> 01:19:41,818 Well, yeah, they're not mine, but yes, we're having a baby. 1047 01:19:41,986 --> 01:19:44,446 We're having twins, actually. 1048 01:19:45,072 --> 01:19:47,782 -What do you mean, "Not mine"? -Didn't mean it like that. 1049 01:19:48,409 --> 01:19:50,368 -Why would you say that? -I'm sorry. 1050 01:19:50,536 --> 01:19:52,203 I'm not exactly thinking straight. 1051 01:19:52,371 --> 01:19:55,165 I've been up all night watching Orca give birth. 1052 01:19:56,208 --> 01:19:58,126 -I am such an idiot. -No, Zoe. 1053 01:19:58,294 --> 01:20:00,712 Oh, God, l am so stupid. 1054 01:20:00,880 --> 01:20:03,631 This is not about money... 1055 01:20:03,799 --> 01:20:05,717 ...or that you can't afford kids. 1056 01:20:05,885 --> 01:20:08,261 You don't want this. That's the problem. 1057 01:20:08,429 --> 01:20:10,305 He always told me he didn't want kids. 1058 01:20:10,473 --> 01:20:11,598 Why are you still here? 1059 01:20:12,308 --> 01:20:14,684 -Okay. -That's it, isn't it? 1060 01:20:14,852 --> 01:20:18,605 Really? After everything we've been through, you think I don't want kids? 1061 01:20:18,772 --> 01:20:21,357 -That's what you just said. -lt's what you just heard. 1062 01:20:21,525 --> 01:20:22,734 There's a big difference. 1063 01:20:24,570 --> 01:20:26,738 I don't think you're ready for this. 1064 01:20:27,281 --> 01:20:28,740 Now that it's all happening... 1065 01:20:28,908 --> 01:20:30,950 ...now you've seen a woman push a baby out... 1066 01:20:31,118 --> 01:20:33,870 ...now it's all too real for you. And you're scared. 1067 01:20:34,038 --> 01:20:37,373 Damn right, I'm scared. Yeah. 1068 01:20:37,541 --> 01:20:39,709 -Aren't you scared? -Know what I'm scared of? 1069 01:20:39,877 --> 01:20:41,794 I'm scared I'm gonna have these babies... 1070 01:20:41,962 --> 01:20:43,630 ...and then you're gonna walk away. 1071 01:20:43,797 --> 01:20:46,508 You're gonna say, "They're not mine," and just walk away. 1072 01:20:46,675 --> 01:20:48,676 You look for some hint that I'm leaving... 1073 01:20:48,844 --> 01:20:51,095 ...no matter how many times I tell you I'm not. 1074 01:20:51,263 --> 01:20:54,265 I don't know what else to do. What else am I supposed to do? 1075 01:20:59,146 --> 01:21:00,188 Nothing. 1076 01:21:03,567 --> 01:21:05,360 So, what are you saying? 1077 01:21:07,029 --> 01:21:08,947 -Just go now. -I don't want to go. 1078 01:21:09,114 --> 01:21:12,158 -Go. -This is crazy, Zoe. It's crazy. 1079 01:21:13,744 --> 01:21:16,037 If you don't go, I'll go. 1080 01:21:29,468 --> 01:21:33,054 You know what? Just so you know when you do the autopsy here... 1081 01:21:33,222 --> 01:21:36,808 ...you better realise you have no one to blame but yourself. 1082 01:21:47,444 --> 01:21:49,112 You had to come along, didn't you? 1083 01:21:50,239 --> 01:21:52,198 I was fine with my plan. 1084 01:21:52,408 --> 01:21:54,534 Totally fine with it. 1085 01:22:52,509 --> 01:22:53,801 You've lost your mind. 1086 01:22:53,969 --> 01:22:55,136 Just give me a boost. 1087 01:22:55,304 --> 01:22:57,722 If you think you are getting into this Dumpster-- 1088 01:22:57,890 --> 01:23:01,142 I need that pillow, okay? I can't sleep. 1089 01:23:01,310 --> 01:23:03,478 I will never sleep again without that pillow. 1090 01:23:03,646 --> 01:23:05,855 Well, go to his house. 1091 01:23:06,023 --> 01:23:08,524 Tell him you're sorry. Then you'll be able to sleep. 1092 01:23:08,692 --> 01:23:11,235 This has nothing to do with that stupid pillow. 1093 01:23:11,403 --> 01:23:14,989 I'm not going to his house, okay? He walked away from me. 1094 01:23:15,157 --> 01:23:16,324 You made him walk away. 1095 01:23:16,492 --> 01:23:18,159 What do you know? You weren't there. 1096 01:23:18,327 --> 01:23:20,203 I've known you for 30 years. 1097 01:23:20,371 --> 01:23:22,830 I know that you would never see this through. 1098 01:23:22,998 --> 01:23:25,208 I know that you don't trust people. 1099 01:23:25,376 --> 01:23:27,502 You and your grandmother, crazy-pants. 1100 01:23:27,670 --> 01:23:29,837 She's been engaged to Arthur for how long now? 1101 01:23:30,005 --> 01:23:31,422 She's never gonna marry him. 1102 01:23:31,590 --> 01:23:34,008 Just like you were never gonna stay with Stan. 1103 01:23:34,176 --> 01:23:35,343 Okay, Mona. 1104 01:23:35,511 --> 01:23:37,845 I mean, no wonder you got a sperm donor. 1105 01:23:38,013 --> 01:23:41,599 He's the perfect boyfriend. He'll never let you down. 1106 01:23:48,190 --> 01:23:52,068 You know, I used a sperm donor because I wanted a baby. 1107 01:23:53,654 --> 01:23:56,197 Because I wanted a family. 1108 01:23:58,325 --> 01:24:01,411 Because Nana's not gonna live forever... 1109 01:24:02,121 --> 01:24:04,330 ...and then it'll just be me. 1110 01:24:05,749 --> 01:24:10,712 Look, just go home. Okay? I don't need you here. 1111 01:24:10,879 --> 01:24:12,463 I need my pillow. 1112 01:24:23,851 --> 01:24:25,893 I'm sorry. 1113 01:24:26,061 --> 01:24:28,187 That was too far. 1114 01:24:29,440 --> 01:24:32,400 Yeah. That was too far. 1115 01:24:34,319 --> 01:24:36,404 But you know I'm right. 1116 01:24:39,032 --> 01:24:41,075 Stop talking. 1117 01:24:41,243 --> 01:24:45,246 My pillow doesn't talk. It just lies there and shuts up. 1118 01:24:57,426 --> 01:24:59,093 Don't beg, Nuts. 1119 01:25:00,554 --> 01:25:03,014 My God, you are stubborn. 1120 01:25:03,223 --> 01:25:05,308 Knock, knock. 1121 01:25:05,476 --> 01:25:07,101 Who's ready to celebrate? 1122 01:25:07,269 --> 01:25:09,020 Oh, Mona, I'm so glad you're here... 1123 01:25:09,188 --> 01:25:12,106 ...because now I can tell both of you together. 1124 01:25:12,983 --> 01:25:14,192 I'm getting married. 1125 01:25:14,568 --> 01:25:15,610 -What? -What? 1126 01:25:15,778 --> 01:25:19,238 Next weekend. We finally decided to do it. 1127 01:25:21,033 --> 01:25:22,909 Oh, my God. 1128 01:25:24,620 --> 01:25:28,748 It finally hit me. This man loves me, and I love him. 1129 01:25:30,375 --> 01:25:32,084 What the hell am I waiting for? 1130 01:25:33,545 --> 01:25:35,838 Oh, I have you to thank for it, Zoe. 1131 01:25:36,006 --> 01:25:40,218 Just seeing you and Stan together, how happy you are. 1132 01:25:40,385 --> 01:25:43,221 You know, the way you've just thrown caution to the wind... 1133 01:25:43,388 --> 01:25:45,389 ...and decided to go for it. 1134 01:25:45,557 --> 01:25:47,558 I want some of that too. 1135 01:25:50,562 --> 01:25:52,021 What? 1136 01:25:53,482 --> 01:25:54,982 Stan and I broke up. 1137 01:25:57,694 --> 01:26:01,072 -He said the babies weren't his. -He didn't mean to say it. 1138 01:26:01,240 --> 01:26:03,950 -Tell her the whole story. -He said it. 1139 01:26:04,117 --> 01:26:07,119 If he said it, he thinks it. If he thinks it, then he feels it. 1140 01:26:07,287 --> 01:26:09,539 And if he feels it, what choice do l have? 1141 01:26:09,706 --> 01:26:12,291 Zoe, you know that's not true. 1142 01:26:12,459 --> 01:26:15,586 You're just looking for another way to back out. 1143 01:26:15,754 --> 01:26:17,672 -Thank you. -I'm not gonna do this. 1144 01:26:17,881 --> 01:26:21,884 This man has chosen to be with you and raise your kids as his own. 1145 01:26:22,094 --> 01:26:27,431 You're just gonna throw that all away for some stupid word choice? 1146 01:27:08,765 --> 01:27:12,476 -Look at you. -Oh, look at you. 1147 01:27:21,194 --> 01:27:22,737 I'm worried about you. 1148 01:27:22,946 --> 01:27:25,281 No, don't worry. 1149 01:27:26,241 --> 01:27:29,994 I'm great. I'm great. 1150 01:27:30,162 --> 01:27:31,579 I'm just emotional. 1151 01:27:32,039 --> 01:27:33,956 Come on, let me just finish your makeup. 1152 01:27:34,124 --> 01:27:36,834 Honey, you don't always have to be so strong. 1153 01:27:37,002 --> 01:27:40,588 I know you learned it from me, but it's no good. What does it get you? 1154 01:27:40,797 --> 01:27:44,592 It means that I take care of myself, just like you always did. 1155 01:27:44,760 --> 01:27:46,886 No, Arthur takes care of me. 1156 01:27:47,054 --> 01:27:50,890 He's been taking care of me for 22 years. I just didn't want to admit it. 1157 01:27:51,058 --> 01:27:55,186 Zoe, stop pushing people away. 1158 01:27:56,146 --> 01:27:59,190 -I don't want to talk about this, okay? -Listen to me. 1159 01:27:59,399 --> 01:28:02,151 Zoe, you will never have a healthy relationship... 1160 01:28:02,319 --> 01:28:04,820 ...with Stan or any man if you don't. 1161 01:28:05,489 --> 01:28:08,991 You have to learn to trust people. 1162 01:28:20,879 --> 01:28:22,505 Okay? 1163 01:28:31,014 --> 01:28:32,056 What is that? 1164 01:28:32,224 --> 01:28:36,435 It's your custom stroller, the Twin X Torpedo. 1165 01:28:38,480 --> 01:28:39,689 I didn't order this. 1166 01:28:39,856 --> 01:28:41,607 Your husband did. Or your boyfriend. 1167 01:28:41,817 --> 01:28:44,735 I don't know exactly what your relationship is. 1168 01:28:44,903 --> 01:28:47,863 Stan? When did he do that? 1169 01:28:48,031 --> 01:28:49,949 About a month ago. 1170 01:28:51,827 --> 01:28:55,079 You don't like it. Shit. We worked really hard on this one. 1171 01:28:58,834 --> 01:29:00,376 He wasn't gonna leave, was he? 1172 01:29:08,593 --> 01:29:11,137 I'm not really sure what's happening here. 1173 01:29:11,304 --> 01:29:13,556 Oh, God. We gotta go get him. 1174 01:29:13,724 --> 01:29:15,933 What? I'm getting married in 20 minutes. 1175 01:29:16,101 --> 01:29:21,939 -Weddings never start on time. -We can't be late. He's 93 years old. 1176 01:29:28,905 --> 01:29:30,364 Stop it. 1177 01:29:30,532 --> 01:29:32,116 Pick up. 1178 01:29:32,284 --> 01:29:34,285 He has to pick up. 1179 01:29:35,871 --> 01:29:39,248 I'm gonna hurl that thing into the fucking holy water. 1180 01:30:16,578 --> 01:30:19,121 Is this new? "The Zoe?" 1181 01:30:19,706 --> 01:30:21,665 Yeah, it's the first week it's been out. 1182 01:30:21,833 --> 01:30:23,667 Can I have a sample? What's it like? 1183 01:30:23,877 --> 01:30:28,506 It's stubborn, overly suspicious and distrustful of men. 1184 01:30:33,887 --> 01:30:37,139 -This song is taking forever. -This song's never gonna be over. 1185 01:30:49,611 --> 01:30:54,532 What time is it, Shadybrook? That's right. It's conga time. 1186 01:30:56,034 --> 01:30:59,161 Everybody, get out there and shake those titanium hips. 1187 01:31:00,664 --> 01:31:02,998 -Conga. -Conga time. 1188 01:31:03,166 --> 01:31:04,959 I need to talk to you for two seconds. 1189 01:31:05,127 --> 01:31:07,419 -We really gotta go. Come on. -We have to go. 1190 01:31:19,850 --> 01:31:21,183 Please, get me out of here. 1191 01:31:21,351 --> 01:31:23,936 I can't find any exit signs behind the purple flowers. 1192 01:31:24,104 --> 01:31:26,313 Who knew the conga was this much fun? 1193 01:31:31,653 --> 01:31:33,362 I have rhythm all of a sudden. 1194 01:31:37,159 --> 01:31:38,701 Oh, shit. 1195 01:31:39,953 --> 01:31:41,078 Why is the floor wet? 1196 01:31:41,246 --> 01:31:45,499 -Damn it, not again. No, not me. -lt wasn't me. 1197 01:31:45,667 --> 01:31:47,001 -Not me. -Nope. 1198 01:31:47,169 --> 01:31:49,587 I think my water just broke. 1199 01:31:51,381 --> 01:31:52,840 Baby time! 1200 01:32:02,434 --> 01:32:03,684 Stop it! 1201 01:32:03,852 --> 01:32:06,604 What can we do for you, darling? 1202 01:32:06,771 --> 01:32:08,647 This dress is tight. 1203 01:32:08,815 --> 01:32:11,275 I can do it. If you want to let me. Grab the strap. 1204 01:32:12,444 --> 01:32:14,820 -Fingernail. -Can we make a pit stop? 1205 01:32:29,461 --> 01:32:30,669 You can't drive in here! 1206 01:32:30,837 --> 01:32:33,255 Okay. Move it. Out of the way. Lady with a baby. 1207 01:32:36,760 --> 01:32:38,510 -What's going on? -Your muffins suck! 1208 01:32:38,678 --> 01:32:40,679 -I'm going out of my mind. -What are you doing? 1209 01:32:40,847 --> 01:32:43,933 I'm trying to call you and doing the conga. My dress is falling. 1210 01:32:44,100 --> 01:32:47,269 When they say labour's painful, they're not kidding. Really hurts. 1211 01:32:47,437 --> 01:32:51,065 -You're in labour? -But the stroller came. It's so beautiful. 1212 01:32:51,233 --> 01:32:54,401 Oh, God! That hurts. 1213 01:32:54,569 --> 01:32:56,570 -Why didn't you pick up your phone? -When? 1214 01:32:56,738 --> 01:32:59,531 I called you a hundred times. I wanted you at the wedding. 1215 01:32:59,699 --> 01:33:01,533 -What wedding? -lt was so beautiful. 1216 01:33:01,701 --> 01:33:02,910 And then it wasn't. 1217 01:33:03,078 --> 01:33:06,413 People slipping everywhere. Oh, God, l hope nobody got hurt. 1218 01:33:06,581 --> 01:33:09,041 -You're not making any sense. -No, that's just it. 1219 01:33:09,251 --> 01:33:11,752 Everything makes sense. 1220 01:33:12,587 --> 01:33:17,383 All of a sudden, everything is just so crystal clear. 1221 01:33:17,550 --> 01:33:19,301 And the thing that's the clearest... 1222 01:33:19,469 --> 01:33:24,390 ...is that l am so madly, deeply, and completely in love with you. 1223 01:33:25,267 --> 01:33:28,602 I can't imagine spending another minute apart. 1224 01:33:37,279 --> 01:33:38,487 Stan. 1225 01:33:39,781 --> 01:33:41,365 Stan? 1226 01:33:42,617 --> 01:33:45,536 Zoe, after all this time, you come in here and you expect-- 1227 01:33:49,040 --> 01:33:51,208 I gotta go to the hospital. I gotta go. 1228 01:33:51,376 --> 01:33:54,753 -Zoe. -Let's go. Move it! Get the lead out. 1229 01:33:54,921 --> 01:33:58,632 -Zoe, wait up! Zoe, wait. -Let's go, let's go, let's go. 1230 01:33:59,175 --> 01:34:03,012 Listen. How do I know when things get tough, you won't just run away again? 1231 01:34:03,179 --> 01:34:07,766 I can't handle it. You broke my heart. You completely destroyed me. 1232 01:34:07,934 --> 01:34:11,645 You destroyed me too! It's not like this has been easy for me! 1233 01:34:11,813 --> 01:34:13,605 Son of a bitch! 1234 01:34:13,773 --> 01:34:15,858 Just breathe through it. It's gonna be okay. 1235 01:34:16,026 --> 01:34:18,027 Don't you tell me it's gonna be okay! 1236 01:34:18,194 --> 01:34:21,071 You don't know it's gonna be okay. It hurts. I'm scared. 1237 01:34:21,239 --> 01:34:22,448 It is gonna be okay! 1238 01:34:22,615 --> 01:34:25,242 -Refrain from yelling at the patient. -I'm not yelling! 1239 01:34:25,410 --> 01:34:28,037 -I'm getting her to see my point! -Sounds like yelling. 1240 01:34:28,204 --> 01:34:30,789 What will it take for you to believe I'm here forever? 1241 01:34:30,957 --> 01:34:32,583 You had to see a stupid stroller? 1242 01:34:32,751 --> 01:34:35,627 I've been to every doctor's appointment with you. 1243 01:34:35,795 --> 01:34:37,421 I picked out names with you. 1244 01:34:39,924 --> 01:34:43,886 I saved this from the very first day we met. 1245 01:34:44,095 --> 01:34:46,805 It's the one that was tails-up. You flipped it to heads. 1246 01:34:46,973 --> 01:34:48,724 I've kept it this whole time. 1247 01:34:51,895 --> 01:34:54,521 And it's brought me the most incredible luck. 1248 01:34:56,983 --> 01:34:58,567 I can't believe you kept that. 1249 01:34:59,569 --> 01:35:01,695 What about the fact that, like it or not... 1250 01:35:01,863 --> 01:35:04,239 ...I will be here holding your hand through this? 1251 01:35:05,533 --> 01:35:09,203 What about the fact that I'm gonna be here when these babies are born? 1252 01:35:09,746 --> 01:35:12,289 Because I love their mommy. 1253 01:35:12,457 --> 01:35:15,709 And what I want more than anything else in the world... 1254 01:35:17,629 --> 01:35:19,546 ...is to be their daddy. 1255 01:35:24,928 --> 01:35:28,680 But you have to promise me that from now on... 1256 01:35:28,848 --> 01:35:31,725 ...you'll believe me when I say I'm in. 1257 01:35:31,893 --> 01:35:34,478 And I'm not going anywhere. 1258 01:35:37,816 --> 01:35:39,942 Can you do that? 1259 01:35:46,116 --> 01:35:47,866 Can you? 1260 01:35:54,749 --> 01:35:55,791 Yes. 1261 01:36:09,848 --> 01:36:10,889 Okay. 1262 01:36:11,057 --> 01:36:14,309 -All right, now push. Time to push. Go. -Okay. 1263 01:36:14,936 --> 01:36:16,812 Breathe, breathe. 1264 01:36:17,814 --> 01:36:19,440 Breathe. 1265 01:36:25,280 --> 01:36:27,072 "Remember my three rules. 1266 01:36:27,240 --> 01:36:29,741 No touch, no talk and no eye contact... 1267 01:36:29,909 --> 01:36:32,786 ...while the dog's nose is busy analysing our energy... 1268 01:36:32,954 --> 01:36:35,581 ...and all the different scents in our body. 1269 01:36:35,748 --> 01:36:38,792 This sniffing can last from three seconds to a minute. 1270 01:36:38,960 --> 01:36:40,961 It's important not to interrupt the dog... 1271 01:36:41,129 --> 01:36:43,797 ...while she's intent on accomplishing this ritual." 1272 01:36:45,049 --> 01:36:46,717 You know, one day... 1273 01:36:46,885 --> 01:36:50,304 ...I'm gonna tell you girls the story of your mommy and me. 1274 01:36:50,472 --> 01:36:52,806 Cesar should write a book about that one. 1275 01:36:53,433 --> 01:36:56,018 Talk about a bestseller. 1276 01:36:56,227 --> 01:36:57,811 Come here. 1277 01:37:01,566 --> 01:37:03,775 That's nice. 1278 01:37:11,993 --> 01:37:13,035 Come here. 1279 01:37:15,205 --> 01:37:18,749 It was a battle, but they finally fell asleep. 1280 01:37:20,668 --> 01:37:22,002 Penny had a poop and then-- 1281 01:37:22,170 --> 01:37:25,923 Don't talk about Penny's poop when I'm about to kiss you. 1282 01:37:26,090 --> 01:37:27,508 Okay. 1283 01:37:48,780 --> 01:37:50,197 It's perfect. 1284 01:37:50,406 --> 01:37:51,907 You know what the best part is? 1285 01:37:53,284 --> 01:37:55,452 You can stop in for lunch every single day. 1286 01:37:57,372 --> 01:38:00,999 -All right. You're here. -Speech. Speech. 1287 01:38:01,709 --> 01:38:03,669 Okay, thank you. 1288 01:38:06,005 --> 01:38:07,256 Thank you all for coming. 1289 01:38:07,465 --> 01:38:10,759 This has been a dream for me for a long time. 1290 01:38:13,555 --> 01:38:17,266 And I need to thank one person for giving me the courage to do it. 1291 01:38:18,560 --> 01:38:21,228 -To Zoe. -Zoe! 1292 01:38:21,396 --> 01:38:24,565 From the moment you stole my cab... 1293 01:38:24,899 --> 01:38:27,609 ...from the day you dissed me at the Farmers' Market... 1294 01:38:27,777 --> 01:38:32,489 ...I have been totally and completely under your spell. 1295 01:38:33,575 --> 01:38:34,950 I love you. 1296 01:38:35,451 --> 01:38:38,036 And you've made me the happiest man alive. 1297 01:38:38,204 --> 01:38:39,454 It was my cab. 1298 01:38:41,874 --> 01:38:43,375 Come over here for a minute. 1299 01:38:43,543 --> 01:38:46,712 -Give me that. -What? 1300 01:38:48,131 --> 01:38:51,675 Since we do everything backwards and in hyperspeed... 1301 01:38:51,843 --> 01:38:53,510 ...I was wondering if we could do... 1302 01:38:53,678 --> 01:38:56,138 ...what naturally follows having twins together. 1303 01:38:58,057 --> 01:38:59,182 Oh, my.... 1304 01:38:59,392 --> 01:39:01,435 Holy shit! 1305 01:39:02,770 --> 01:39:04,146 Will you marry me? 1306 01:39:07,275 --> 01:39:08,859 Say yes. 1307 01:39:13,531 --> 01:39:14,865 Yes. 1308 01:39:31,382 --> 01:39:34,593 -I can't believe it. -I know. 1309 01:39:35,720 --> 01:39:39,097 -Did we really just get engaged? -Yes, we did. 1310 01:39:40,433 --> 01:39:42,809 Soon you will be my wife. 1311 01:39:50,109 --> 01:40:01,161 Stan. 1312 01:40:17,136 --> 01:40:19,971 -Action. -What? 1313 01:40:37,699 --> 01:40:41,243 Dakota was born right here. Right where you're sitting, actually. 1314 01:40:41,452 --> 01:40:43,286 How did you do that here in this chair? 1315 01:40:43,454 --> 01:40:45,580 The seat comes up. 1316 01:40:48,710 --> 01:40:52,212 -What do you have in your hand? -Daddy, poo-poo. 1317 01:40:56,134 --> 01:40:59,261 What a good girl. You're okay. Tuck, get up there. Go on. 1318 01:40:59,429 --> 01:41:02,848 Go on. Go on. Go on. 1319 01:41:06,060 --> 01:41:08,812 Now, wait a minute! Just one second! 1320 01:41:09,021 --> 01:41:11,565 When did you eat corn? Is this cat shit? 1321 01:41:11,733 --> 01:41:13,233 No. 1322 01:41:14,152 --> 01:41:16,945 We don't even know what kind of shit it is. 1323 01:41:21,659 --> 01:41:24,369 Go on, go on. Good, good, good. Go on, go on, go on. 1324 01:41:25,830 --> 01:41:29,416 Take one. Take five. Take ten. Fifteen. Twenty-four. 1325 01:41:29,625 --> 01:41:32,335 -There. Happy now? -You know what goes in those things? 1326 01:41:32,837 --> 01:41:34,880 -Oh, my God. -Awesome. 1327 01:41:35,381 --> 01:41:38,675 Yeah, do that. That would be nice. Oh, God. 1328 01:41:38,885 --> 01:41:43,346 Breast to face. There is no better bond that could be made. 1329 01:41:43,514 --> 01:41:45,432 Breast to face. 1330 01:41:45,641 --> 01:41:48,894 Buck-naked Fridays in the family room. Buck-naked Wednesdays. 1331 01:41:49,061 --> 01:41:51,855 Buck-naked Friday while the maid cleans your living room. 1332 01:41:52,023 --> 01:41:54,357 Buck-naked. Buck-naked. Naked. 1333 01:41:54,525 --> 01:41:56,151 Oh, God. Oh, God. 1334 01:42:01,741 --> 01:42:04,576 Perfectly natural. Sometimes the bowels just release. 1335 01:42:04,744 --> 01:42:05,786 My mother is dead. 1336 01:42:05,953 --> 01:42:10,123 If she was here, she would probably let me feed from her teat. 1337 01:42:15,838 --> 01:42:19,883 Get the mirror, Stan! I will rip your throat out! 1338 01:42:25,640 --> 01:42:28,099 Oh, no. Oh, no. 1339 01:42:34,023 --> 01:42:35,982 Not tonight, okay? 1340 01:42:38,027 --> 01:42:39,361 Okay. 1341 01:42:44,909 --> 01:42:47,160 -And cut. -Food in my hair. 101926

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